#You and your stupid stupid heart and you did it to yourself
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niilue · 3 days ago
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—when you hear vi call caitlyn cupcake, hurt and jealousy remind you that, no matter how much it hurts, you will never be more than a shadow in her life.—
cw: female reader, angst, jealousy, emotional pain, drama, this is short tho…. maybe need a sec. part
part ii
you remain motionless, feeling the heat of anger begin to crawl up your neck, setting every nerve in your body on fire. your fists clench at your sides, nails digging into your palms, and the taste of rage mixes with something uglier, something harder to swallow: jealousy.
you don’t want to feel this way. you shouldn’t feel this way, because you have no right. you and vi are nothing, there are no promises or bonds that allow you to claim any part of her. but the fact that vi still calls her “cupcake” after everything that happened, after how caitlyn left her hurt and alone, makes you sick. because you were the one who was there. you were the one who found vi after that fight, doubled over in pain, trying to hide her vulnerability behind a broken smile.
you remember those nights underground, when vi got drunk to bury the disappointment and threw herself into stupid fights, looking for blows that might distract her from the real pain. it was you who followed her, who made sure she didn’t end up with her head cracked open in a dark alley, who endured her shouts and outbursts when you tried to help her. you took care of her, even when she didn’t want you to, even when you knew she would never thank you for it.
but here you are now, standing like an idiot, watching vi call caitlyn by that nickname, as if none of it mattered, as if everything you did for her was insignificant. you feel something break inside you, something you had been trying so hard to hold together. the fury and sadness swirl in your chest, and for a second, you can’t breathe.
“really?” you spit out the words, your voice full of venom before you can stop yourself. vi turns to you, her blue eyes narrowing in confusion. there’s something in her expression that makes your blood boil even more, as if she can’t understand why you’re so upset. as if the fact that this hurts you is a mystery.
“what?” vi frowns, crossing her arms over her chest as if preparing for a confrontation. you can see how the muscles of her abdomen still tense slightly, a reminder of where caitlyn hit her with the shotgun, and that only fuels your anger.
you step forward, and your words come out fast and full of rage. “cupcake? seriously? after everything that happened?” your voice trembles, and you hate how vulnerable you sound, but you can’t stop. “after she left you lying in the dirt, kicking up dust, because she decided you weren’t worth it? after i was the one who had to pick up your pieces, who tried to keep you from beating yourself to death out of your own damn self-destructiveness?”
vi blinks, clearly taken aback by the intensity of your words. her lips part, and you can see how she hardens, how her eyes become sharp, as if trying to find something to say, some kind of defense. but you don’t give her the chance.
“i was the one who was there,” you continue, and your voice cracks, but you push on. “i was the one who made sure you didn’t bleed out in some alley, who tried to make you feel like you weren’t alone. but of course, that doesn’t matter, right?!” your throat tightens, and you feel tears burning behind your eyes, but you force them to stay where they are. you won’t cry. not here, not now.
vi clenches her jaw, and her eyes flash with something you can’t decipher. “why do you care so much?” she asks, and though her tone is defensive, there’s something else there, something that seems uncertain. as if she can’t understand why all of this affects you so deeply. “why are you acting like… like this is personal?”
the silence that follows is almost deafening. your heart beats so hard that it feels like it’s going to burst out of your chest, and for a second, you can’t find the words. because you don’t have an answer you can give her without revealing everything you’ve been trying to deny.
“because…” you try, and your voice breaks again. you can’t tell her that you’ve started to feel something for her, something that scares you and hurts you and fills you with hope all at once. you can’t tell her that just seeing her smile at caitlyn, hearing her use that damned nickname, makes you feel like nothing more than a shadow in her life, someone who will always come second.
“because we’re nothing,” you finally say, and each word is a dagger in your chest. “and we might never be anything, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.” your voice is a whisper full of bitterness, and your shoulders slump slightly, as if the weight of your own emotions is too much to bear.
vi watches you, and you can see how her expression changes. there’s something in her eyes, a mix of guilt and something you can’t quite identify, but you don’t say anything else. you take a step back, shaking your head, trying to push away the storm of feelings that threatens to break you.
“forget it,” you murmur, and you turn around before vi can see how hurt you are. “it doesn’t matter.”
but as you walk away, letting the distance grow between you, you know that it does matter. it matters more than you want to admit, and even though you hate feeling this way, you know that this pain, this jealousy, won’t go away so easily.
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deliciousangelfestival · 3 days ago
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You're the One - 2
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Summary: A daughter uncovers the wild, untold story of how her parents’ marriage began—and it’s way better than any romance movie she’s ever watched.
Character: Husband!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader
Genre: Romance, Comedy
Words Count : 1,654
Chapter 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , -
Main Masterlist || If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee on Ko-fi 🙏🏻
Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️
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“So, that’s it,” Bucky finished, leaning back in his chair.
Jade sat frozen, her mouth slightly open, her hand hovering over the popcorn bowl she’d forgotten about entirely. Her eyes were wide with disbelief. “Hold on, Dad!” she blurted out, breaking the silence. “You can’t just end the story like that!”
Bucky shifted uncomfortably, rubbing the back of his neck. The way she said it—the tone, the determination—it reminded him so much of you that it gave him chills.
“Clark Jordan?” Jade said, her voice rising. “That Jordan? Oh my God, Mom was actually going to marry a conglomerate heir?” She gasped dramatically, throwing her hands in the air.
Bucky groaned and rolled his eyes. “Excuse me! Your father also owns a successful business, you know.”
Jade couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s just a joke. Don’t get all defensive.” She rested her chin in her palm, tilting her head as she studied him. Her expression softened. “But seriously… if you loved Mom so much, why did you two break up?”
Bucky’s jaw tightened, and he looked down at his hands, which were fidgeting with the label of the water bottle he’d grabbed earlier. He let out a slow sigh before answering. “I can’t explain it,” he said quietly. “We were young and stupid… Well, I was the stupid one for letting her go.”
Jade nodded slowly, her face thoughtful. “Yeah, I can see that,” she said, her tone teasing but not cruel.
Bucky shot her a pointed look, but his lips twitched in a reluctant smile. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, kid.”
Jade shrugged, grinning now. “Anytime.”
“What happened next?” Jade leaned forward, her curiosity growing. “Did anyone chase after you two?”
Bucky sighed, rubbing his temples. “That’s a lot to unpack,” he muttered.
🔔💍🔔💍
Flashback
The church erupted into chaos. Gasps echoed through the hall, bridesmaids huddled together whispering in disbelief, and the Jordans were already barking orders at security. The bride was gone—snatched right out of her own wedding.
You were still reeling. Sitting stiffly in the passenger seat of a moving car, your hands gripped your bouquet so tightly that the petals were beginning to wilt. Your heart pounded against your ribcage as you stared out of the window, the landscape blurring past.
In the driver’s seat, Bucky’s grip on the wheel was steady. His expression was calm, almost infuriatingly so, as though he hadn’t just crashed your wedding and whisked you away in front of hundreds of people.
Your voice finally found its way out. “Why are you doing this?”
Bucky didn’t answer, his eyes fixed on the road ahead.
“Turn this car around, Bucky. You don’t understand the trouble you’re in.”
He ignored you, his jaw tight, and your frustration bubbled over. You knew exactly what kind of chaos this would cause. Your parents, already controlling, would unleash their full fury, and the Jordans—especially Clark—wouldn't take this humiliation lying down.
Suddenly, the car jerked to a stop. Your body pitched forward slightly, and you braced yourself against the dashboard.
Bucky turned to you, his movements deliberate. His gaze locked with yours, intense and unwavering. Leaning closer, his presence filled the space between you, and instinctively, you leaned back.
“I’ve made a lot of mistakes,” he said, his voice steady, his words slicing through the charged silence. “But the biggest mistake I ever made was letting you go.”
You froze, the weight of his confession catching you off guard.
The breakup had been mutual—or at least, that’s what you had told yourself back then. The truth was, Bucky had been the one to pull away. It had hurt, but you’d respected his decision, thinking he had his reasons. You never imagined he’d regret it.
“Then why did you suggest it?” The question slipped out before you could stop it.
For a moment, he didn’t answer. His gaze flicked away, focusing on the distant horizon outside the windshield. When he finally spoke, his voice was lower, tinged with something raw.
“When we were together, I felt like I wasn’t enough for you. You deserved more—better than the life I could give you at the time. So I thought… if I let you go, you’d find that ‘better.’”
The weight in your chest grew heavier as you listened. His words didn’t erase the pain of the past, but they unraveled pieces of the mystery that had lingered for so long.
He continued, his voice steady but quieter. “And then I saw that article… the one with you and Clark. That photo of him holding your hand. I knew I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t try one last time.”
You turned to look at him, his profile outlined in the faint light of the dashboard. His hand on the wheel was steady, but there was a tension in his shoulders, like he was bracing for rejection.
“One week,” he said, breaking the silence. He held up a finger. “Give me one week to prove to you that this”—he gestured between the two of you—“is worth fighting for.”
You blinked, the audacity of his demand rendering you momentarily speechless.
“Are you out of your mind?”
“Maybe,” he said, his lips twitching into the faintest hint of a smirk. “But I’m not going to spend the rest of my life wondering what could’ve been. If I can’t change your mind in a week, I’ll take you back. No drama. No excuses. I’ll even apologize to both families.”
His words hung in the air, daring you to respond. The car was quiet, save for the hum of the engine and the sound of your shallow breathing.
"You can't just barge in and demand a second chance, Bucky," you snapped, your voice sharp as you yanked the veil from your head. The delicate lace caught briefly on your hair, but you didn’t care. “If we’d never broken up, none of this would’ve happened.”
Bucky’s grip on the steering wheel tightened. His jaw clenched as he glanced at you, his voice calm but with an edge of frustration. “Both of us agreed, remember? You kept walking that day.”
Your mind flashed back to that day—the one that had changed everything. The apartment you’d shared was nearly empty, save for a few boxes. You had been standing in the doorway, one hand on the knob, the other clutching a bag.
“I didn’t want to walk away!” you shot back, your eyes blazing as you turned to him. “I was hoping you’d stop me. That you’d chase after me.” Your voice cracked slightly, but you pushed through. “But you didn’t. You just… kept walking.”
His breath hitched at your words, his body stiffening as though they’d hit him like a punch to the gut. The realization sank in slowly, and he sat there in silence for a moment, staring at you with wide, almost vulnerable eyes.
“Wait… are you saying there was still a chance back then?” His voice was quieter now, almost disbelieving.
You crossed your arms and looked away, unwilling to give him an easy answer. The memory of that day was too raw, the hurt too deep.
Bucky’s lips pressed into a thin line as he absorbed your words. Slowly, a flicker of hope sparked in his expression, something unspoken but undeniable.
Without another word, he started the car again, the engine humming to life.
“You said once that you wanted to try skydiving,” he said suddenly, his voice breaking the tension. “Let’s do that together.”
Your head whipped around to face him, your eyes narrowing. “Excuse me?"
A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips, the playful glint in his eyes unmistakable. “Oh, it won’t just be skydiving. We’ll do everything on your bucket list. Every. Single. Thing.”
Your bucket list? You blinked, caught off guard. “You remembered that?”
“Of course I did,” he said, glancing at you briefly before returning his focus to the road. “I’ve always remembered.”
His tone was softer now, almost wistful, and you hated how much it made your heart ache. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, unsure of how to respond.
“You’re not saying no,” he added after a beat, his smirk returning. “Does that mean you’re having second thoughts about this wedding?”
Your glare snapped back to him, but you didn’t have the words to argue. Instead, you crossed your arms and said firmly, “Be quiet and drive.”
Bucky’s grin widened as he looked ahead. “Yes, ma’am.”
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Present Time
"I never knew Mom had that side of her," Jade said, her voice full of surprise. "It’s pretty obvious she was having second thoughts about marrying Clark."
Bucky leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, looking a little smug. "I did the right thing."
Jade nodded, then her expression shifted. "But what about grandpa? Was he mad at you? Because right now you and grandpa were pretty close."
Bucky chuckled, running a hand through his hair. "Well, if I could change your mom’s mind, I figured I could convince him too." He laughed again, but it was a little forced as he rubbed his back, probably remembering that time. "Let’s just say, he wasn’t thrilled about me stealing his daughter."
"You already know how this ends," Bucky said with a chuckle. "Your mom and I ended up together."
Jade leaned in, her eyes full of curiosity. "But I want to know the full story! How did she end up giving you a second chance? Please..." She gave him her best puppy eyes, the kind she knew always worked on him.
"Come on, Dad, you’re holding back! Did you two really go skydiving? What happened next?"
Bucky leaned forward, a sly grin on his face. He paused for a second, clearly enjoying the suspense. "I’m not spilling all the details just yet."
Jade groaned in frustration. "Dad!"
Bucky just winked at her. "You’ll find out eventually. But trust me, that was just the beginning of the adventure."
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Author Note: What do you want to see next between the reader and Bucky?
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xoluvx · 1 day ago
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cause i wonder; b.eilish ❥₊ ⊹
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as the decade would play us for fools and you saw my bones out with somebody new
stay with me ya'll cause i'm feeling a bit emo. just imagine billie seeing you after you've broken up. the first time she's seen you since it all went down. you quit each other; no contact only painful blistering ache. it harbored in your hearts. you carried it like an anchor sinking to the pit of your stomach. it was debilitating and all consuming and now you were at her show. standing with your friends like you weren't hanging on by a thread threatening to snap any second. like you weren't completely shattered on the inside.
she'd spotted you almost instantly. when your eyes met, all the noise drowned out. all you could hear was the sound of your heart beating rapidly, wanting to jump out of your chest and run right up to her on stage. she looked away and tried composing herself, but you could tell she was off. she was confused. you were confused and you couldn't outwardly feel any of it. not in this crowd. not with your friends. not even with yourself because you'd both chosen this.
it could've been so easy to fight for it, but you didn't. instead you lived with the pain and regret and the tears forming in your eyes and the quiet sniffles and excuses to go to the bathroom because you couldn't bare to carry the pain and you couldn't bare pretending it was all okay when you were both walking with open wounds.
so if i sell my apartment and you have some kids with an internet starlet, will that make your memory fade from this scarlet maroon like it never happened?
could it be enough to just float in your orbit?
wounds too large to heal. you almost prayed they didn't heal because you could still feel her in every fiber of your being. in every step you took and every song you listened to. twirled in your thoughts and your memories. intimate memories of arms brushing, fingers lacing, legs tangling. soft whispering and gentle caresses. longing moans and tender sighs. hands touching while lips kissed. tongues tussling while nails clawed. whimpers and shivers down spines. they all replayed in your head like a cruel fucking joke.
all you could do was wish you could go back to your bubble and hide from the world like you didn't exist. longing to go back to your safe space instead of standing in an arena of people chanting her name. you reverted to spacing out just like you did every day. going about in a daze. everything losing its color and taste. coffee bland. eyes blank. heart bruised. bubble bursting suddenly leaving you raw and shivering. so you watched her from afar doing what she loved. smiling faintly when your friends tugged on your arm forcing you to dance. clapping when she bowed.
she was your sun and you just existed to orbit around her. you would've done it for decades if she'd asked you to.
and if you want to tear my world apart say you'll always wonder. cause i wonder.
but neither of you could admit to the love still festering in your hearts and neither of you could admit to the pain you both caused. neither of you would pick up the phone and admit defeat to the cruel game with no winners. you were two losers yearning for each other. clapping at your seat. wondering who was waiting for her backstage. who she was going to wrap her arms around. who she was longing for. so stupid and oblivious to the fact that her heart still belong to you. searching for you in the sea of people while you still wondered.
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saladoffruitcolored · 3 days ago
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Yandere platonic omega father x neglected child reader PT 8
You were in the living room enjoying one of your few moments of rest, since your father married Sarah it's still weird not to call her Dr. Sarah your whole life has changed drastically
During the wedding planning your father warned you that there would be changes, changes for the better, but honestly nothing prepared you for it, for years your life was a constant monotony suddenly everything changed and you were uprooted from everything you ever knew
The first change was the house, the house you always knew was gone, Sarah sold it for the lowest bid possible and donated the money to some needy orphanage saying
"the past belongs in the past, I don't want any old memories to work on our bright future as a family, do you understand that right dear? Sometimes the best thing to do is to TOTALLY get rid of the past and everything that reminds you of it, so you can focus TOTALLY on the future”
She said these words with such a bright smile that you didn’t have the courage to disagree despite the sadness you felt when saying goodbye for the last time to the house that had been your home since you were born
Now you lived in a big and cozy house, the colors were handpicked and Sarah insisted that you should paint the walls by hand to create nice modern decor together, she was right, despite the sadness you felt for being in a house that was completely foreign to you, it would be a lie to say that you didn’t have fun painting the living room walls a cheerful shade of soft yellow, watching Sarah trip and spill blue paint on your father was completely hilarious
The second change was school, your enrollment in the private school was canceled and now you study at home learning directly from the best tutors that money can buy, it was expected that you could learn several subjects, languages ​​and musical instruments at the same time
And you HAD to be able to learn, failure is not an option, you HAD to show that you are not a failure, show that you are sorry, that you are not USELESS, if you could prove this maybe Sarah wouldn't decide to leave like HE was
You weren't stupid, you knew very well that your school payments were late, it was easy to notice the different way the teachers treated you, always singling you out and never letting you participate in parties or extracurricular activities, you weren't blind enough not to notice the dirty looks that the other parents gave your father or the look of pity that the principal had on her face whenever she talked to your father
It was just a matter of feeling sorry until you were asked to leave school, you were already mentally preparing yourself for the embarrassment that would be all your classmates whispering about you they already were
Your prediction was right, you really did leave school but not the just as you imagined, instead of leaving with your head down you walked out next to Sarah while she was being pampered by the principal, the faculty that had previously ignored you at the very least were now showering Sarah with praise, each one trying their best to cement their place as a helpful educator in the memory of your new stepmother
Your whole life has changed so quickly that you feel like the world has turned upside down
It was already night and you were home alone, your tutors had already left a few hours ago leaving you with a series of homework assignments that needed to be done perfectly and turned in as soon as possible
While you were writing your last essay you heard a noise, loud laughter and shouted whispers, they both seemed happy
Ah it seems your father and stepmother have arrived
You want to feel happy that the two of you get along so well, you really want to feel happy that your father has moved on but deep down, inside your already hurt heart, you you feel the cold feeling of fear whispering insecurities in your ear, what if Sarah gets pregnant? Will you be forgotten and left aside again? Will the only person you love leave you and start loving this new baby more than he loves you? It would make sense, why would he love you, the fruit of a failed marriage, when he can love a new baby from a new love?
You force yourself to silence these insecurities by forcing yourself to focus on the lesson in front of you, it's a lesson taught by a college business professor, Sarah personally chose him to teach you
You hear them before you see them, it's impossible not to, they both look euphoric as they enter your new room, your father looks happy happier than you've seen him in years and Sarah is smiling and smiling
"Today we had an indescribable victory in court", your father's words were breathless, he was euphoric and happy, you could see the happiness in his eyes, he stumbled in the air the same way a sailor used to being at sea for a long time would stumble when stepping on dry land again after months
It was as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders
Sarah on the other hand seemed more in control, the only difference between her normal appearance and the current one is that her hair was literally messy and she was blushing happy on the cheeks
She is so beautiful and smart, if she got pregnant the baby would be infinitely more beautiful than you, you would be overshadowed in beauty and intelligence, if you don't stand out in one of the two what would be your use in the family?
“We were thinking of celebrating, what do you think of a family outing? Maybe a picnic? A stay at a hotel on the beach? Oh we can take a trip to France, I used to go there with my parents all the time, I have wonderful memories, I’ll show you all my favorite places” as she listed everything the three of you would do as a family and all the girl-only activities the two of you could do you felt a little numb
Ironically when you were just a little puppy, before the divorce, your omega father promised to take you on a trip to France, he of course never kept his promise, at least not to you because the last time you looked at his social media, before blocking and permanently deleting you, he took a trip with his daughters to the city of lights
For years you wanted to visit Paris and it seemed like now you would be able to, ironically your omega father was partly responsible for giving you that experience
“By the way about your clothes”, Sarah’s nose twitched in slight disgust
Your clothes? Sarah doesn’t like them? You've already gotten her disapproval... why are you so useless
“How about we give them all to charity? Since we're going to Paris we might as well take the opportunity to buy you dozens of new clothes, you don't have to wear these anymore”
“Sure, I'd love to”, your voice cracked a little, maybe your father and Sarah thought it was due to excitement but in reality it was because of embarrassment, was there something wrong with your clothes? Did she think you were badly dressed? Did everyone think that?
You thought you were well dressed, you made money yourself by selling schoolwork to your classmates, you saved up to buy them and did your best to sew them when they eventually ripped
“WONDERFUL!! I knew you would like the idea, I can't wait, we're going to have a GREAT time together, we can even buy clothes together”, Sarah happily left your room after wishing you a good night, her loud and cheerful voice could be heard as she talked about how this would be the best trip ever and how she needed to start planning the trip right now
Your father finally approached you and hugged you
“Good night dear, remember these are changes for the better, changes for the better”, the hug comforted you a little, but not enough, after he left the room you were alone
Looking in the mirror you started to feel very
self-conscious“I have to do it, I can't ruin daddy's happiness... I'm going to do it”, you needed to change, it was necessary to change, that's okay, even if it hurt to know that your appearance didn't seem to be enough
These are changes for the better, if to evolve it's necessary to change everything about yourself then everything Well, everything will be fine
You repeated these words to yourself like a will throughout the night, unfortunately your attempt to convince yourself of this did not take away the pain in your heart
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sweetheartsaku · 2 days ago
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(BLLK) FOR MY LOVE IS COLD
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𝜗𝜚 ITOSHI RIN: AEONIUM
a/n: [gn!reader, 1.6k wc] OOC RIN OOC RIN!!! dw rin kissers,, fluff will drop after exam szn :3c
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"could you stop leeching onto me? it looks pathetic."
you had hit rock bottom for what felt like the 27th time this week, and all you wanted was to be held by your boyfriend. he was watching one of his previous games in his room. you had come home exhausted and distressed, trying your hardest to keep it all in as your eyes sting, blinking at the ceiling. all you wanted right then and there was the precious gaze of your one and most beloved boyfriend, itoshi rin.
you gently place yourself next to him as he intently watches his game. your gentle hand instinctively reaches out to caress a stray hair out of his face, eyes lovingly glued onto him. that was, before he swatted you away. your eyes widen.
oh. okay, again? mistake, maybe? only innocently yearning the warmth of your beloved after a freezing morning, you reach out again. before being proven wrong as he swatted your hand away from his jaw, again, this time with more venom.
"can't you control yourself? its annoying me." he scowls, his tone cold and careless. his turquoise eyes making contact with yours, showing you a side you've never seen before.
"oh— uhm..." what was happening right now? you felt your heartstring tug. hard.
"how much more embarrassing can you be?"
your eyes widen, your heart sinks like a messy melody that abruptly stops. an out of tune violin's string snaps.
“do y-you mean that?” you whisper under your breath, breaking eye contact as the smallest tears can't help but swell in your eyes. rin lets out a scoff, noticing you break eye contact and the tears which forms in your eyes. he leans down once to be at eye level with you.
"tch- why would i say it if i didn't mean it? don't get all emotional." he says coldly.
you pull away, gently pushing yourself off the spot next to him, still using your gentleness as you walk off.
“i.. need to go to the bathroom.”
rin's eyes narrow, seeing you push yourself away from him. he's not even sure why you're reacting in this way. he lets out a grunt before he watches you start to walk away, his eyes following suit. but what? what is making him walk over to your direction? he didn't need to; he could've just let you rot. right?
locking yourself inside; curling up against the door, like a blossom shrivelling from the merciless, dry sun. knees pressed at your chest, like a bandaid which temporarily covers the wet wound. wiping your endless flow of tears, you place your head on your knees.
rin sighs at hearing the sound of the door being locked, a part of him is feeling irritated. yet— guilty? he makes his way to the door, knocking on it.
the irritated side of him spits. "this is so stupid." he whispers under his breath, yet that was all the silence needed to be filled.
you choke on your own sob and instantly cover your mouth. was he really saying all that? that's not the rin you fell in love with. that was probably the last response you’d ever want to hear. what has gotten into your own boyfriend?
rin's eyebrows furrow at the sound of the broken sob. he knows you're upset because of his tone and words, but, it's not like he meant to make you cry. right? he bangs on the door, this time a little harder than before.
"let me in." he says firmly.
scared at what he might do at the harshness of the knocks, you immediately open the door. did i just open the door out of fear? your eyes widen at the thought, and you step back as your meet his eyes through your glossy lids.
rin doesn't say a word upon seeing your face, his eyes studying your features up close. the sight of you looking like that because of his words and tone, just makes his heart... ache. seeing you look at him so fearfully breaks him, he's feeling regret for what he said. he's never seen you like this before, it's heartbreaking for him to see.
he sighs deeply, his expression softening somewhat.
"are you... going to keep crying?" he asks lowly, the slightest hint of regret clear in his voice.
"why are you so mean?"
welp, here you were.
dishevelled and hot, bothered and uncomfy. some sort of funny feeling lingered in the air as it got stuck in your throat, like a lyric that doesn't rhyme in a romantic dissonance.
he frowns at your question, "i am not trying to be mean. you are just thinking too much about everything." he tries to deny himself, responding bluntly, eyes studying your expression. your eyes widen even more as more tears can't help but stream down. you felt like you were going to puke. why was he like this? why... would he say that?
rin's eyes widen slightly at seeing your reaction, more tears falling down your face and your eyes widening, it's making his heart ache even more, for some reason.
he clenches his jaw, feeling even more regret and guilt. he didn't mean to make you this emotional and scared. he sighs deeply once more.
"w-wait. don't cry, you know i didn't mean it—" did itoshi rin just... stutter? he says it softly, taking a step closer to you.
you flinch immediately, the same feeling after opening the door out of fear comes back. rin watches the way you flinch away from him, it makes his heart ache even more. he feels like the shittiest boyfriend ever. but why can't he admit it? he then slowly and gently reaches a hand out to grab your wrist, making him come even closer to you, his body now a few inches away from yours.
"don't be scared, i won't hurt you…" he says quietly. it's like he was a monster.
“b-but you just did-!”
rin lets out another deep sigh, it's like your words are further stabbing him in the heart.
he doesn't even know where it all went wrong, he just didn't want to seem weak and vulnerable, he didn't mean to make you feel scared or hurt. he swallows thickly, his eyes meeting yours.
"that wasn't my intention…don't look at me like that." he whispers, his hand still on your wrist.
“b-but i asked you! if you.. really meant those words and you instantly replied 'yes-!'"
rin's eyes widen in realization and his expression falters hearing those words. he feels his stomach drop upon realizing what you said, a wave of guilt washing over him.
he goes silent. eyes glued to everything but your soaked face, knowing he did that to you. his hand still gripping your wrist.
he doesn't say anything else, he just watches you.
“i d-didnt mean to be clingy and embarrassing-- i just wanted to be held by my boyfriend—! at one of the lowest points of my life— i thought spending time with my— what i call ‘boyfriend’ would make me feel better, b-because it always does--!” you hiccup, letting your true emotions flow in love and care for rin.
your words hit his heart like a brick. you're telling him everything, and you look so hurt and vulnerable, and it's his fault. he's the reason for that. his heart aches, it's painful for him to see you like this. he clenches his jaw, swallowing thickly as he's still staring at you.
"you thought being with me would make you feel better?" he says quietly, his voice wavering slightly.
“y-yes ofcourse—! it always does and i— ive never felt stupid or embarrassing when im around you— because i thought you loved me and I love you—!”
rin's heart feels like bursting out of his chest right now. your words and your tone, the way you're looking at him. he's the reason your self-esteem is probably the lowest its ever been right now. he swallows again, his jaw clenching even tighter.
"i-i do love you. you know i do.." he says in a quiet strained voice.
in a quick response, “well why would you say those things? out of love?”
he hesitates for a moment before he responds. his eyes glance to the side briefly before he looks back at yours. he swallows once more, feeling the guilt building up inside him. rin’s heart aches upon hearing your words. you're trying, more than hard enough, and he just wasn't able to see it. he was frustrated and he didn't mean to be so harsh.
"your hands were all over, and it was starting to get on my nerves. i didn't mean to hurt you…" he says, a note of clear regret in his voice.
“i am trying to be as loving and as patient as i can... just like before we started dating… and i st-still am-! loving you is as easy as pie but i just— just—! never thought you would say that stuff.”
he takes a step closer to you, standing directly in front of you. he sighs once more, his eyes meeting yours again, guilt clear in them.
"i wasn't thinking. i didn't think before i said it." he confesses.
“there are so many rude comments i could make right now. so many voices i can raise and so much anger and sadness i could lash on you. but i choose not to because i love you.”
he swallows thickly once more, his heart hurting even more. you're going to be the death of him. his hands subconsciously curl into fists at his sides.
"i don't deserve you, i'm so sorry…"
you instantly capture him and hold him in your arms, gently saying, just like you has been for the past couple minutes, what came out of your heart.
“don't say that, sweetheart.”
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a1ecmcdowell · 2 days ago
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mechanic!dean x bimbo!reader headcanons!
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you have a car that he fucking loves and he tried to tell you when you brought it in for the first time and you were just like
"yes i love the white ones!!"
because of course daddy bought it for you and you knew nothing about it
just that it's white and it goes really fast
and that it breaks when you accidentally run over the curb in the mall parking lot, yes the one that is taller than a speedbump for the very reason of keeping people from hitting it
he knew he'd be in for it when you hopped out of that driver's seat in pink heels and a little black dress
and when he saw the dash and back glass lined with pretty pink tulle and those stupid pink fuzzy dice hanging from the rearview mirror
and dean could not resist teasing you at ALLLL then like
"how can you see through the mirror with all that glittery shit in there?"
and proceeded to actually stop dead in his tracks when you, without looking up from your phone, said "that's what the mirror is for?"
like he honestly could not believe it
he's like ... oddly endeared by your antics but also so fucking stressed out
because at one point before you started dating it was like you didn't know that you could just. come in and see him
no you were popping tires and busting your radiator and, at one point, casually confessed to a hit and run on someone's mailbox
just so you had a reason to show up to his work
like ??? he did not even know what to do about that. call the police ??? no. fuck the cops
but one time he was driving down the backroads himself in baby, heading a longer way home from work and he saw a mailbox on the ground
and he knew you did that. like he just knew
that was the moment he realized that he was going to ask you out. something about the fact that you were so desperate to see him that you saw a mailbox and promptly went "whoopsies!" before ramming into it
omfg he was sold
at one point early on, too, so he didn't have any secrets from you, he tried to tell you about the family business that the winchesters had, at one point, before sam went to college and he shifted into mechanic work instead of demon hunting
and you were perched on the hood of your car, him next to you, as he poured his heart out
and the very first thing you said after he finished, terrified that you'd run for the hills, was "so you just put seasoned the floors and read the bible?"
there's just something so INNOCENT about your naivety that he gets so attached to it
of course he calls you princess. you are his princess. his pretty pink princess
he drops 75 bucks on your fresh manicure every paycheck too
and you are so excited to show him what he paid for every time
it's like when you pretend to care about his work rants, while barely even knowing what a spark plug is
because he has no idea what pink aura acrylics with chrome means
sometimes you offer to drive on your dates and he's like NOOO it's okay baby let me treat you alright let me do this right
but really he is fucking terrified that he's going to end up an accomplice in one of your mailbox murders
and he really can't add that to his criminal record.
that you know about btw. ate him up too about it like "y'know college kids make fake ids. you don't have to like ... steal them"
those random moments of clarity in your pretty little head were always at his expense and it never failed to catch him off guard
the backseat and the passenger seat's leather are literally embedded with your perfume
he gets into the car and takes a big ol whiff every time. like habit
yes you do let him try on your pink satiny underwear HEHEHE
and yes he DOOO LIKE IT HEHEHEEH
he did not like when you made him do a spin like he was a little puppy in a sweater or something
you tried to teach yourself how to bake for him so he could have a treat after the longer shifts at the shop
and it was a travesty really. you knew the pie was burnt but like ... thought it was salvageable ?
and dean still ate it yessir. to keep the tears out of your eyes at your disappointment that it flopped
"i'm jus gonna eat around the burnt parts pretty thing no big deal!!"
it was such a big deal to you though. every little misstep even if it was so silly
you have big feelings alright. big feelings for someone who was so small
even in your heels dean towers over you
he lets you paint his nails. complains like "can't let the fuckin' rednecks that come to the shop see this shit" all grumbly like
but then you find another pretty color and he's got his nails already ready like 💅
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notes, omfg i hope u guys like this this was so fun. i just wanted to try something new while i'm on like ... very minor writing block rn </3 i think "tough guy" dean x soft ditzy girl who keeps him on his toes but softens his edges and the walls he put up is just SOOOO < 3333
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just-dreaming-marvel · 3 days ago
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Love That Burns ~ 35
LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST
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< previous chapter
Word Count: 3,090ish
Summary: You and Logan fight to save Mariko.
Warnings: wounds, fighting, near death experiences
Notes: I have loved all the reactions I've received! Please keep them coming. They all mean so much to me! This is the last chapter before we start on the two different endings! Ending 1 will come out before ending 2. Also, before the ending 1 starts coming out, I'm going to post the one-shot for this series about their everyday lives from the ten year gap.
Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks! 
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You gasped as you woke up naked on the medical bed you had died on. Looking around, you could tell that you were alone. Meaning that Logan had followed through with going to save Mariko, which was what you had asked of him. You were honestly surprised that you had risen from the dead again, but you couldn't waste any more time. You needed to get to Logan.
You quickly found some clothes to wear and the location of Yashida’s birthplace. Thankfully, rich people always had a few cars lying around, and you were off. Racing to get to Logan before he did anything incredibly stupid.
~~~
Logan’s anger was fueling him forward. He needed to rescue Mariko and finish off Dr. Green. He needed to get his revenge for you. When Logan arrived at the town, he was met with Harada, waiting in the streets for him. Logan could sense that there were others nearby, hiding in the shadows.
“I see you’ve come to fight,” Harada stated, coming towards Logan. “It’s pointless. You’re outnumbered. The Black Clan has protected the House of Yashida for 700 years.”
The Black Clan began emerging from the shadows, from the alleys and the rooftops.
“Is that all the men you brought?” Logan challenged. “I’m going to get to Mariko.”
“We are grateful for your protection of Mariko. But there is one more sacrifice you must make for her family.”
“Go fuck yourself, pretty boy.”
Harada yelled, and the fighting began. It didn’t take long for the other Black Clan members to jump down and join, with more continuing to appear on the rooftops. Hard ordered them to begin firing arrows as Logan started to run through the streets. Logan got halfway through town before the arrows began to have heavy wires attached. Logan grunted as he tried to continue on despite the resistance of the wires. He groaned as a poisoned arrow hit the middle of his back. His vision began to blur, but Logan continued to move forward. The Black Clan continued to shoot wired arrows into his back until Logan collapsed face-first into the snow.
~~~
You followed the tracks of a fight in the snow once you reached the town. Your heart clenched at the sight of the clear marks of someone being dragged. You knew it had to be Logan. You continued to follow the tracks, slipping into the large house on the hill. With your powers fully restored, it was easy to take down the Black Clan members in your way. Eventually, you reached the center of the building, revealing to be a large, open lab spanning the whole building. 
Glancing down, you saw Logan locked up in some machine that kept his hands facing outward. You could see him moving slightly and groaning like he was waking up. With a sudden tug, you could see Logan trying to free himself. Slowly and quietly, you began to sneak down.
“Stand back," Dr. Green ordered the nearby Black Clan members as she waltzed up. “There is no need.”
“Where’s Mariko?” Logan demanded. “Where is she?”
“Are you pinning for someone who is not your wife? For shame. Where is your wife anyway?” Logan simply growled. “Did she not make it? Too weak?”
“Shut the fuck up!”
Dr. Green smirked before looking away at the giant samurai nearby. “Impressive, no? He is made of adamantium, just like you.” Logan continued to try to break free. “Oh, Logan, you know what, I get it. You’re frustrated.” 
She pressed some buttons, moving the machine that Logan was stuck in forward. The machine pulled his arms forward, away from his body. Logan kept heaving breaths as the machine kept him still, drilling into him and inflicting pain.
“I know Mariko is here,” Logan panted. “I want to see her.”
"You want answers,” Dr. Green stated.
“Yes, I want answers!”
“I’m sorry, I wish I could say more, but I was hired in part for my discretion.” Dr. Green leaned forward, up against the machine, taunting Logan. 
“I’m sure you were."
“That and a certain talent for combining biochemistry and metaphysics. High-grade toxins are my specialty. It helps to be genetically immune to every poison known to man, as I am. And immune to the toxin of man himself… as I am.”
“I’ll tell you what, you twisted mutant bitch, why don’t you open these bracelets, and we'll see who’s made of what?” Logan released his claws. Almost as soon as he did, the machine clamped down further around his fists, preventing his claws from retracting.
“The claws,” Dr. Green smiled. "Now we can begin. The suppressant bug you found inside of you and your wife was mine. You took it out on your own. I didn’t see that coming. Did you take your wife's out, too? Is that why she’s not here?”
“You don’t deserve to talk about her!”
“You are strong. You have courage. Real courage. But that won’t help much now.”
The giant metal samurai ripped itself free from the wires it was connected to. It stomped over to Logan, going around him, before stopping in front. You arrived on the same floor they were on in time to see the giant samurai pull a huge sword out and line it up with Logan’s claws. Your eyes widened as you noticed the sword heat up as it lifted. You rushed over and threw yourself between Logan and the samurai.
“Stop!” You shouted. 
The samurai lost its concentration, hitting the back of the machine Logan was in, throwing you, Logan, and Dr. Green around while the samurai fell back. Logan grunted as he landed on his knees.
“Y/N!” He yelled.
You looked up and over at him, shooting him a smile. “Hey, handsome,” you breathed out. “Miss me?”
Logan opened his mouth to say something, but before he could, he noticed the samurai getting back up. Slamming the leftover wrist clamp against the stairs, it came clattering off. He ran over to you and grabbed your hand, tugging you up harshly to stumble against his chest. His lips quickly captured yours for a brief kiss.
“You gotta stop doing that, sweetheart,” he whispered. 
“Gotta keep you on your toes somehow, honey,” you replied with a smirk.
He smirked back. “You’re gonna be the death of me.” The samurai stomping closer caused Logan to start to drag you in the opposite direction. “Run! Go!”
You and Logan ran side-by-side. You noticed Dr. Green rushing to cut you off. You threw your hands out, launching her over the railing and down a few floors in a ball of flames. Harada and Mariko rushed out of a room a few floors up.
“Go!” Logan urged, waving them off. “Run!”
The two of you began running down the stairs. The giant samurai jumped down to the level you had reached. Logan let out a roar as he flung himself at the samurai, causing himself and the samurai to fall down a few levels.
“Logan!” You screamed, looking over the railing to see him squaring up with the samurai. 
You spun around and tried to take the stairs two at a time to get to Logan. You could hear him groaning, straining to keep the samurai’s sword still as he used his claws as a shield. You reached the floor in time to see the samurai pull out a second sword that was quickly heating up. Using the railing, you launched yourself onto the back of the samurai and took hold of the heated sword with one of your hands. You focused on heating the sword up further, causing it to begin to lose its shape. It dropped the melting sword and reached back. It grabbed you and threw you over the railing.
“Y/N!” Logan roared.
You cried out in pain as you harshly landed a few floors down. You could hear Logan and the samurai fighting for a few moments before you heard a thud close by. Logan was quickly kneeling beside you, checking you over.
“Are you okay?” He asked, eyes still frantically searching you over. He carefully helped you sit up.
“Honestly, I’m ready to go home,” you responded.
He let out a hearty chuckle. “Me, too, darling.”
The samurai dropped down onto the level the two of you were on. Logan pulled you up and dragged you over to the electrical boxes. Using his claws, he ruined the boxes, turning off most of the lights in the building. You and Logan quietly hid behind nearby posts as the samurai searched for the two of you. The samurai passed the two of you, allowing Logan to jump on its back and retrieve another sword it had. 
“Y/N!” Logan shouted. 
He tossed you the sword, and you caught it. Holding it with both hands, you began to heat it up. The samurai spun around, kicking Logan down, allowing you to cut the head off the samurai. Logan launched himself at the samurai again, forcing him and the metal monster down to the bottom floor. The samurai slammed against the wall, breaking a hole into it that Logan was launched through.
“Logan!” You yelled.
You ran down the flights of stairs as Logan climbed back into the building. You dropped to your knees in front of him, the two of you quickly wrapping your arms around each other. In a blink of an eye, the samurai grabbed your ankles and tore you from Logan’s grasp.
“No!” Logan shouted, hands barely brushing against your arms as you’re torn out of reach.
The samurai spun you around and grasped onto your hands. The metal clamped against your wrists, and three drills from each of the metal hands appeared and began drilling into your fists, right into your bones. You screamed out in pain.
“Let her go!” Logan demanded.
The middle of the samurai opened up to reveal Yashida.
“Logan-san,” he greeted. “Don't look so shocked. With you at my side, I survived Nagasaki. Surely, I could survive this.” You let out another scream as the drills pushed further into you. “It’s alright. It won’t take long.”
“What are you doing to her?!” Logan didn't know what move to make without hurting you.
“Dr. Green and I have been waiting. It’s only this armor that's kept me alive. We built it to make me strong so I can take what you would not give. And transfer your unwanted healing to my body. It’s only by mere coincidence that your wife could also provide what you would not give. My legacy must be preserved. Your mistake was to believe that a life without end can have no meaning. It is the only life that can.”
Logan was watching as the life slowly drained from your body. You were growing older while Yashida was growing younger. He couldn’t get his eyes to look away from you. He couldn’t force himself to move.
“Logan!” Yukio shouted, throwing one of the large swords in his direction.
Logan caught it, gripping it with both hands, causing it to heat up. He stood up and, with a shout, threw the sword into Yashida’s head. The metal hands retracted the drills and let you go. Logan caught you before you could collapse onto the ground. Yashida stumbled back, gasping for breath, before falling out of the building to his death.
“Sweetheart,” Logan shook you, trying to get you to gain consciousness. “Wake up… I really can’t handle this again… I need you to wake up.” Yukio slowly came over, watching the scene. “Come on, honey.” 
The only hope Logan had was the fact that you were still breathing. You had to wake up. Yukio placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder.
“We need to get her some medical attention,” Yukio said.
Logan nodded, hoisting you further up into his arms before standing up. Yukio led the way out, where Mariko and Harada were waiting safely.
“Logan! Y/N!” Mariko exclaimed, rushing towards Logan. “Oh my gosh!” Mariko looked you over, immediately seeing your increase in age. “We need to get her to a hospital.”
“No,” Logan pulled you closer. “Too dangerous.”
“Logan, I have my grandfather’s business under my control. I have resources. The two of you have helped me so much. Please let me return the favor.”
“Mariko can help,” Harada agreed.
Logan scoffed. “Not really caring for your word right now, bub,” he muttered.
“Trust me,” Mariko pressed. “I won’t let any happen to either of you anymore.”
~~~
Logan snarled at anyone who tried to pry you from his arms the moment Mariko had the group escorted to a private wing of a nearby hospital. Yukio and Mariko had to work together to coax him into setting you on the bed. He insisted on staying near you the entire time. 
The doctor Mariko had called in specialized in mutants, giving Logan hope and making him even more cautious. Logan’s eyes created a rotation going from your rising chest, your face, to the monitors and back. He wanted to know everything and not miss a second of anything. He stood on the edge of every room you were brought into, like a constant guarding shadow. Mariko and Yukio took turns trying to get Logan to rest, but he couldn’t leave you.
It took a few hours for the doctor to get any results from the tests they had run. The doctor informed the group that you were slowly healing and de-aging. They said that you’d be fine in a day or two and would most likely sleep the entire time. The doctor encouraged the group to keep you there until you woke up, and Logan reluctantly agreed. 
“There's one other thing,” the doctor added, after updating the group. “I talked to Dr. McCoy on the phone, and he informed me of the incident that happened ten years ago when Y/N returned from the dead like a Phoenix.”
“What about it?” Logan asked. 
“Was that the only time?”
“No. She did it about a day ago.”
“That would explain what we saw in the blood we took.”
Logan took a protective step closer. “What did you see, doc?”
“Mr. Howlett, your wife is a powerful mutant, but when she rises from the dead like that, it sucks away at some of her abilities. The tests we ran and compared to previous tests that Dr. McCoy had run, show that her mutation is slowly decaying.”
“Are you saying that she’s dying?”
“Not exactly. She could still live another hundred years as long as she is careful. The more she rises from the dead, the faster her mutation will decay, meaning the faster—“
“She’ll die… Can she use the other parts of her mutant?”
“Of course. But I would be wary of bringing her into any more life-threatening situations. I have sent our findings to Dr. McCoy for his records, and so that he can keep track of Y/N himself.”
Logan clenched his jaw as he stared at you, processing the information. Mariko stepped forward and placed a hand on Logan’s back.
“Thank you, Doctor,” Mariko said.
“Of course,” the doctor replied. “I’ll be around if there’s anything you need.” 
The doctor left as Logan walked over to your bedside. You were slowly returning to the woman he knew. But, even if you hadn’t, Logan would have loved you anyway.
“I need to take her home,” Logan murmured.
“I’ll have the plane ready for as soon as she wakes,” Mariko said.
“No,” Logan shook his head. “I need to get her home now.”
“Logan—“
“I appreciate what you’ve done. But it’s my duty to take care of her and the best way I can manage that is at home.”
“If you’re sure.” Logan nodded, causing Mariko to sigh. “I’ll go make the calls.”
Mariko left to go to as she said. Logan gently took your hand and lifted it up, pressing a kiss to the back of it.
“We’re going home, sweetheart,” Logan whispered. “And we’ll never leave again.”
~~~
You needed to move, but you were trapped. The familiar weight of Logan’s arms around your waist was comforting, with his head resting on your shoulder. But you felt like you hadn’t moved in days; your muscles were stiff. As you slowly opened your eyes, you quickly realized that you were no longer in Japan. You were home. Logan’s head was on your shoulder, with his arms around you, keeping you against his bare chest. You lifted your arm and began scratching Logan’s arm. He groaned as he began to wake.
“Sweetheart?” He mumbled into your neck.
“It’s me,” you whispered.
Logan’s head lifted to fully look at you as his arms tightened around you. “You have to stop worrying me… I can’t take anymore.”
“I'm sorry. I’ll try hard not to.” Logan leaned down and kissed you softly. “When did we get home?”
“Last night. The doctor cleared you, and I wanted you home.”
You reached up and cupped Logan’s cheek. You could tell that the concern was still lingering. “I’m sorry I scared you.”
“I know, darling.” Logan grabbed your wrist and turned his head to kiss the palm of his hand. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
Logan then explained what the doctor had found out about your ability to rise from the dead. You could feel Logan trembling as he spoke, like he was finally letting all his concerns out. Once he was finished, you pulled him to lay on top of you. Logan was careful not to fully put his whole weight on you but appreciated you holding him.
“I’m not going anywhere,” you quietly promised Logan.
“No more danger,” Logan muttered. “No more missions.” He pulled back enough to allow your eyes to meet. “I need you safe. I need you here.”
“I won’t promise that unless you can promise the same thing… I can't lose you either.”
“I’m not the one with the habit of dying.”
“I promise I don't try to.”
“I know, sweetheart… Alright, no missions. No danger. For either of us.” He leaned down and gave you a brief kiss. “I never asked, how are you feeling?”
You smiled up at him. “I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“I’ll let you know if it changes, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I do have one thing, though.”
“Anything.”
“Can we stay in bed all day?”
Logan gave a hardy laugh as he wrapped you in his arms and rolled over so you were on top of him. “Sounds like a plan, sweetheart.”
Ending 1 next chapter >
Ending 2 next chapter >
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whokilledsamara · 2 days ago
Note
I loved ur alphabet nsfw with scarletella!!! BUTTT SPECIFICALLY the umbrella one!!! Is it possible to ummm maybe you'd write that whole situation down?? ANDDD I feel like he'd only do it if he's mad n being a lil petty!
MISUSE
a Mr. Scarletella x afab!reader fic. {an: ooo... i like this one.. i have a similar request and i will do both of them. love me some misuse of an object}
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warnings! : misuse of an umbrella {handle is inserted, but you get poked with the tip}, bleeding, hatefucking, sadism, afab reader {i can write amab in another request if needed}, bondage, non/dub-con, "forced" blowjob
{an : i was super excited to write this one, as soon as i got the notification for this request i had to write it. thank you all for the support! this one could be considered non-con, but its really just hate fucking, reader doesnt say no. sorry this one isnt long, its just a quick thing im writing before i go to sleep}
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hiding didn't work. you could hear the static in your head, matter of fact you could see it too. the cold, and slightly damp flooring made your senses all the more tingling, head a bit woozy from all the running. it was innocent really, the man who always happened to be crawling brought you a gift, and in return you gave him a small peck on the cheek. you hadn't thought anything of it, but you saw him. he saw you too.
bold move. he saw it as defiance. doesn't matter if it was innocent or not, he noticed. he notices everything even when you don't know he is there. the moment you saw red flash in the corner of your eye, you knew you fucked up.
why did you touch that stupid umbrella..
hours passed and nothing happened. you assumed everything was fine, and that perhaps Mr. Scarletella had just gotten his feelings hurt, not angry as you had assumed. but your hopes were cut short when you heard him, his voice filled with static and coldness as usual.
"Knees."
the way he said it in his language unwillingly did something to you, though you would never admit it. sighing to yourself, you obey his command and slowly sink to your knees. your gaze is locked on the floor as his eyes glare at you. though you aren't looking at him, you can feel it.
his presence alone makes the room feel thick and uncomfortable, but having his cock shoved down your throat definitely didn't make it any better. it was your fault really. you knew better than to attempt to get past him. his strong hand on your hair made sure you were kept up as high as you could go without actually leaving your knees, his thick length clouding your senses as you desperately tried to choke it down. tears welled in your eyes and all you could see was that sadistic grin that he almost always had on his face, though it was wider this time.
once he had his fill, and so did you, he yanked your head off of him, watching sadistically as you gasp for air. the dried tears on your face only made his heart rate speed up, that shit eating grin never leaving his face.
"You, remove, clothing." he says. not even as a question, but a statement. sputtering and coughing up his leftovers, you grudgingly slip off your bottoms, eyes closed and face flushed with embarrassment. his head tilts and he hums in response, crouching down in front of you.
your body is tense, and your eyes are squeezed tight with anticipation. his long, slender hand makes you shiver at the coldness as he parts your leg, putting you on display for him. a few seconds go by, and just as you are about to open your eyes, you feel a cold poke to your clit. its cold, and strange, making your eyes snap open to stare at the foreign object.
his umbrella.
you start stuttering and looking up at him with a worried expression, the tip of it pressed firmly against your clit. he experimentally moves it back and fourth, making your hips unwillingly jerk from the sensations. your face heats up and you watch carefully as he flips the object around, suddenly pressing the edge of the handle against your opening. "w-what the fuck.. what? that wont fit.. what are you do-" you begin to argue, but are quickly cut off as he pushes it in, using the curled part to his advantage and pushing it as deep as he can. you let out a shriek, thighs trembling and hands firmly planted on the damp ground beside you. he makes a few curious thrusts with it, seemingly getting off on the view, or maybe even feeling it himself.
"a-ah.. hurts.. mngh.." you manage to choke out, your voice a low whine as he twists the handle inside of you. he seems to notice a bit of blood around your opening, only exciting him further as he thrusts it faster. your legs lift slightly and you cry out, his hand shooting to cover your mouth as to not alert the other members. eyes clenched shut, he curves the handle just the perfect amount, that for some reason makes your vision go black for a second as you unwillingly orgasm around the foreign object.
pathetic noises leave your lips, his hand tightening around your lower face as his grin only grows wider. "Good." he mutters, slowly pulling the umbrella out of you. his hand leaves your face and before you can think properly he is pushing the handle into your mouth, effectively making you taste the mix of cum and blood off of it. "Clean." and so you do. you quickly suck off whatever you can, your face tired and worn. he pulls it out of your mouth and pats your head, before static surrounds him.
and hes gone.
{ made by @whokilledsamara }
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parfaitblogs · 3 days ago
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hi! im not the anon who asked for the headcanon but it was SO good. you should do one for lila where he and reader are not dating but she stills likes him!!!! and goes under complete transformation after the pool kiss with stuff like, she stops taking coffee or lunch with him and starts doing so with emily. like passive rejection from reader? but it’s just her protecting her heart, omg.
lowkey my favourite thing to do… (ignore someone i’m not dating because they didn’t give me the attention my brain conjured up because limerence is my best friend forever 🎀). this got even longer Goodness Gracious somebody take my keyboard away from me.
s1 spencer… much different to s8… and you are not dating him… but because this is parfaitblogs’ fanfiction blog he has a big fat crush on you back. as god intended.
as someone who grew up without romantic relationships, i feel like he would take the attention lila’s giving him in a sort of quick attachment way. but it still feels wrong because he’s pretty sure he likes you, but nothing has ever happened between you two so he believes it’s a silly crush he needs to get over!! never mind the teasing and the lingering touches and the nights you spend cooped up at work with him to finish case details. they were just friendly!! and this is what he needed to get over you.
except you’re distancing yourself from him because why does him kissing lila hurt so much and why do you hate the jokes morgan keeps making about spencer’s actress girlfriend? and he notices it immediately, because even if he’s supposed to be paying attention to this new girl he’s started something with, he can’t stop thinking about you and the walls you’ve put up.
maybe you’re on a case! and he can’t sleep because he’s thinking about his best friend turned stranger (you), and you’re thinking about him in that stupid pool kissing lila, so you both decide to go to the diner across the street of the hotel. just because the universe loves to twiddle their thumbs and meddle in your business.
and it’s a very awkward acknowledgement that you’re going to be spending that night in the diner together, because why wouldn’t you? but then he’s asking if he did something in the smallest voice possible, and you’re shrugging your shoulders and not really saying anything. so, like the genius he is, he goes through recent groundbreaking events that has happened for the two of you, and he lands on the kiss with lila. maybe it’s a twitch in your hand, or a readjustment of how you’re sitting, but he knows it’s that, and things start to fall into place.
he’s asking why you’re upset because of that, and it’s a lot of verbal poking and prodding at you before you finally express that it made you jealous, and you don’t feel like you have any right to be jealous, so you just ignored him instead. he tells you if he caught you kissing some other guy he’d probably feel the same, then realises he probably shouldn’t have told you that, and stammers to try and explain himself.
but he’s really cute, and you smile at him for the first time since that kiss with lila, and he’s pretty sure everything’s okay between you two again.
and also he gets to take you on a date as an apology for kissing a girl he doesn’t really like.
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amethystwrytes · 3 days ago
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Safe (Part Seven)
Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X Fem. Reader X Lee Minho
Summary: A broke ER Nurse offers up her services to a large crime organization in exchange for much higher pay and benefits that are unconventional, but lucrative. The life proves to be questionable at best, and downright isolating at worst which leaves her feeling unsure, unstable and dangerous. 
Warnings: Explicit language. Explicit depictions of sex (some chapters will be more explicit than others sexually). Violence. Blood. Trauma injuries. (Organized) Crime. Emotional manipulation. Discussion of murder and physical assault. Medical inaccuracy galore. Smoking. Past addiction. 18+ Only MDNI.
Chapter WC: 3.5K
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~ Part Seven ~ (Series M. List Here)
Two vibrant, undeniably visible pink lines scream at you from the bathroom countertop. 
“What does it say?” Seungmin hobbles up behind you. 
“Get out! God, you fucking leech! I’m literally staring at a plastic stick dripping with my piss here, can I get a minute to myself?!” you scream and shove him out the door, he stumbles back and hits the opposite wall with a thud as you slam and lock the bathroom door. 
“I guess I’ll take that as a positive then!” he yells, “Hormonal asshole! I’ve just been shot in the leg today, no big deal!” you hear him hobble back down the hallway. 
Actually it’s a double positive, since you’ve taken two tests. One might be a dud, right? It happens. It’s possible. You, as a nurse, had personally never seen a false positive on a pregnancy test, but you hear things, right? It’s happened. So you squeezed out a little more pee for test #2, after all, that’s probably why they give you two in a box anyhow. Yet even with barely enough urine to soak the stupid scratchy tip of the test, the lines were so clearly there that you had no choice but to believe them. 
“Fuck.” 
The word comes out in a choked sob as you sit back down on the toilet, your face in your hands. 
How? You are a fucking nurse. How did you let this happen? 
Working at the hospital had always had its perks, like how you could just drop into gynecology, sign a paper, and have the nurse give you your shot, most of the time it was someone you knew and were friendly with. It was convenient, it was easy, you were able to do it on your breaks for goodness sake. You never made an appointment or anything, so there wouldn’t be any kind of reminder from the office to come back to stay on schedule. Evidently you were the type of person who needed them though, because here you sit on a toilet, in a house that doesn’t belong to you, pregnant with…
With whose fucking child? You laugh, audibly laugh, and it slowly turns into sobs. You don’t even know who the father is. Hyunjin? Minho? One of them, obviously. You’ve been fucking them both longer than six weeks, which is what you put yourself at if you’re getting nauseous and vomiting. Of course you can’t know for certain, that will have to be confirmed at an obstetrics appointment, which you will now have to go to, routinely. 
The words abortion, adoption flash in your mind. You did not plan this, you did not want this. Yet even as you sit here, drops of pee all over the place, sobbing into your hands, you can’t quite seem to change the “did not want” to “do not want” in your head. 
“I do not want this,” you say it out loud, because maybe you just need to audibly hear yourself say it, but it comes out as a complete and utter lie. You feel in your very heart that it’s a lie. 
“I want this,” you whisper, the ghost of a smile spreading across your lips, and suddenly the scared and ugly tears are replaced with a sense of overwhelming excitement. “I want this.” 
You clean up the bathroom and roll up the pregnancy tests in a paper towel, you have no idea why you feel like saving them, but you roll them up anyway. 
When you walk back into the kitchen Seungmin is sitting at the table, his bandaged leg propped up on a chair, “Well?” 
“I’m pregnant,” you state, shocked at your own calmness, picking up your supplies from patching him up earlier to put them back where they belong. 
“Shit,” he whistles low, “Well what are you going to do?” he asks. 
“Have a baby, Seungmin, that’s what I’m going to do.” 
“Do you really think-...”
“What I really think is you should shut your mouth, because you have absolutely zero fucking opinions that matter regarding this, do you want to try me Kim Seungmin? I dare you.” 
“No ma’am.” 
“Good then.” 
🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️
When Minho, Hyunjin and Jisung walk through your door later that evening your very blood turns to ice; an indescribable feeling of excitement, fear, elation and dread consuming your every fiber. 
“How’s the leg?” Hyunjin asks Seungmin, smacking the back of his shoulder. 
“It’s uh,” he looks at you nervously which causes the other three men to look at you as well, “It’s fine. Doc here stitched me up.” Smooth Seungmin, smooth as silk you fucking twat. 
“Did you all get into a wrestling match or something? What’s with the vibes?” Jisung teases. 
“Nothing,” Seungmin answers too fast, “take me home Han, can I get some pain meds or something?” he looks in your general direction but refuses to make eye contact with you. 
“Already sorted them out,” you say pointedly, sliding a little bag across the table, “don’t take them all at once, that would be a pity.”
He sneers at you then stands up, hobbling towards the door, “Han. Now.” 
Jisung closes the refrigerator he was about to descend upon and scurries over, “Shit, okay.” 
You watch as the two of them disappear and close the door. You can feel Minho and Hyunjin staring you down. 
“Did he say something to you again? Because if so we can drag his ass back in here and set it straight,” Minho asks. 
“No,” you shake your head and sit down, “No, he just knows something that you don’t,” you look up at him, terrified of how the next few minutes will play out. Wondering if you shouldn’t bring it up right now, but knowing you’ve said too much not to at this point. 
“What would that be?” Minho frowns. 
“I found out today…” your voice waivers which only seems to concern both men more. 
“Found what out, sweetheart?” Hyunjin sits next to you, his fingers caressing your forearm. 
You pick a spot on the table to look at, because you can’t bring yourself to look at either of them, “I’m pregnant.” 
Silence. Well, the only sound is Minho pulling out the other dining chair for himself, probably so he doesn’t collapse where he stands. 
The three of you sit there for several moments in just total and complete silence. The hum of the ceiling fan sounding more and more like nails on a chalkboard with every passing second. 
“What do you want to do, baby?” it’s Hyunjin that speaks first, and you can tell that he is trying to keep any emotion from his expression, but you can’t tell if he’s hiding a reaction that’s good or bad. 
“I want,” you exhale slowly, “I am going to be a mother, I will not abort this pregnancy, I do not want to talk about adoption. I will not discuss either, and I don’t want to hear it.” 
At this Minho stiffens, his face contorting into something between disgust and hurt, “___, baby, I would never ask you to do something you didn’t want…we…Hyunjin and I…” he stops talking and chuckles. 
“How do we want to do this?” he looks at you and Hyunjin. You know what he’s really asking is  what the fuck is the plan on raising a baby with three parents? but you also don’t have an answer to that. 
“Let’s please not worry or talk about that right now,” you laugh painfully, “I can’t deal with that part right now. Obviously one of you…you know…impregnated me,” you clear your throat, “but there’s no way for me to know who at this point, not without a DNA test and honestly…I love both of you so I just don’t think I want to know, does that make sense?” 
“Makes sense to me,” Hyunjin smiles and effectively ends that part of the discussion, “We’re having a baby?” his voice drips with elation and every muscle in your body relaxes. 
You nod, happy tears brimming your lids, “Yes.” 
“We’re having a baby,” Minho laughs, and you’re surprised to see tears in his eyes as well.
🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️
“You know,” you sit at the bathroom vanity applying your moisturizer when Minho steps out of the shower, “I was terrified to tell you.” 
“Me specifically?” he points to his naked chest. 
“Honestly? Yes…” 
Minho nods and gnaws at his lip, “I guess I deserve that, but I promised you I’d never give you another reason to be scared of me, and I meant it - you never have to be scared of me baby.” 
“I wasn’t scared that you’d be mad at me, I don’t think, I guess I just thought you’d be upset at the idea of having a child. We are not a traditional couple in any way shape or form, so we’ve not really talked about traditional things, like marriage or babies or futures. I didn’t know what you wanted for your life, I still don’t I suppose,” you explain. 
He sits next to you on the bench, “Seola…” his voice cracks at the mention of his late wife's name, “she wanted children, she wanted to be a mother,” he covers his mouth with his hand and squeezes his eyes shut, tears roll down his cheeks and you throw your arms around him. 
“I am so sorry,” you sob with him, “I’m so sorry you lost her, lost your life with her, a future with her. Minho, I’m so sorry.”  
He cries into the small of your neck for a moment before taking a deep breath and righting himself. 
“When the words first came out of your mouth, I felt so guilty, because all I could think about was how she was robbed of that moment, that moment she would get to tell me she was pregnant, but I was so happy anyway, happy without her - it doesn’t seem fair, or right.” 
“It’s not,” you cup his face, “It is not fair.” 
“I was always undecided,” he sniffs, “Part of me, of course, adores the thought of having a son or daughter to raise, to love, someone who can become my whole world and someone to leave a legacy to but then I look around, at the guns, at the murder - is that really what I want to leave anyone with, let alone someone I love so much? Which actually,” he sighs,  “Actually that brings me to something I’ve been thinking about the past couple hours.” 
“What?” 
“I own lots of properties, here in the city and surrounding areas primarily, some are safe houses, some are renters for additional income, but there’s one property, one that absolutely no other soul on Earth knows I own, it’s a last resort - my ‘absolutely have exhausted all options and efforts’ backup - located in Applecross, Scotland,-” 
“Scotland?” you snort, “That is the most random thing I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth. I don’t think I’ve ever once heard you utter the word Scotland,” you chuckle. 
“There’s a reason for that, and now you’re the only other person who knows I own a house there,” he says, an uneasy expression on his face. 
“Why are you telling me?” 
“Because I want you to go there, you can take Hyunjin with you if you want, and when all this shit is over I’ll come join you - we can have the baby there, and someday when the dust settles we can come back here, but you’ll be safer-” 
“No,” you shake your head. 
“You won’t even hear me out?” he argues. 
“No, I won’t, I’m not going anywhere, not without you, I won’t,” you look at him, fighting back tears. 
“But you’ll be safe there,” he continues. 
“Physically? Maybe, but my heart will break if I can’t see you, if I don’t know what’s happening here, happening to you. I will spend every moment miserable and I don’t want it,” you tell him seriously. “No. I will not go.” 
“Fine, okay,” he nods, pushing his wet hair back out of his face. “I’m not going to argue with the mother of my child,” he smirks, “but promise me that you’ll think about it, it really is a lovely location - a little foggy - but if things get too heated here, please remember what I’ve said.” 
“I will keep it in the back of my mind, but I’m not going anywhere without you,” you lean over and kiss his lips. 
“I love you,” he whispers against your mouth, “I love you so much.” His hand finds purchase on your stomach, his fingers fanning out across, “I’m so happy for us.” 
Hyunjin is relaxed on a chair, doodling in his sketchbook when you and Minho emerge from the master bath. 
You frown, “Why are you not in your pajamas? Are you working tonight…again?” 
Hyunjin sets the book down, “I am. Changbin, Felix and I have a meeting with one of Parks guys, they have some intel on the storehouse Jeongin and Seungmin scouted. Park has dabbled in Taehyungs heroin deals in the past, he’s had guys in the building, we’re going to try and map it out so we know exactly where we’re going  the night it all goes down,” he explains with a yawn. 
“You’re all so tired,” you shake your head, “I worry about your clarity.” 
“Don’t worry baby,” he scoots to the edge of the chair, nuzzling his nose against your belly, “Tonight will be friendly, we’ll play cards and smoke and talk, I’ll try to draw out a map based on the information, no danger, promise.” 
“When do you have to leave?” you ask, glancing at the wall clock, just after 10:30pm. 
“Hmm, probably around midnight, that’s usually when they all meet up at their little club house,” he chuckles, “Why?” 
You grin, biting at your lip as you pull the ribbon on your bathrobe, slowly exposing your nudity underneath. 
“I have been insatiably horny the past few days, I guess I know why now,” you giggle, “unfortunately the horniness seems to be constantly competing with unimaginable nausea, but as of this moment, guess who isn’t nauseous?” 
Minho licks his lips and stands behind you, tugging at the opening of the robe, helping it fall gently down your shoulders and arms. 
Hyunjin smiles, dropping to his knees and lifting one of your legs up to rest on the chair he was previously sat on, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through baby,” he whispers, his lips ghosting over the flesh of your inner thigh, leaving goosebumps. 
“Let’s take special care of our girl,” Minho says, his lips on the shell of your ear, his delicate fingers gently massaging your breasts. 
“I like the sound of that,” you chuckle. 
Hyunjin uses his fingers to spread you open, placing a gentle kiss against your clit and your head rolls back, resting on Minhos shoulder as you let out a soft breath. 
“Fuck,” Minhos voice is raspy and dark in your ear, “I love watching him eat you out, it’s so fucking hot.”
“Mmm,” is all you can muster as an agreement. 
Hyunjin is being soft tonight, delicate, savoring. You can feel yourself practically dripping around his tongue, his lips. Your eyes close, the sound of his soft kisses and wet licks consuming you, your need to orgasm so heavy that it aches. It’s his little whimper into your pussy that pushes you over the edge, poor Minho takes the brunt of your full weight as you dig your fingers into Hyunjins scalp, riding out your high on his face. 
Hyunjin stands, pressing himself, with his hard erection against your front, capturing your mouth with his sopping wet lips. You can feel Minho stroking your hair, his cock pressed against your backside. You turn around to face him, gently pushing him back onto the bed behind. 
He shimmies out of his pants before scooting back onto the pillows as you crawl over him, dipping your head down to kiss trails up his thighs. His hard length throbbing, tip dark and waiting eagerly for relief. You spit, his eyes widening as he watches your saliva drip down his shaft before you take it into your fist and pump, causing his head to fall back onto the pillows while you work him slowly. 
Meanwhile, you feel Hyunjin behind you, his hips rutting against your backside, seeking permission to fill you from behind, which you’re more than happy to give. 
“Hard or soft baby?” Hyunjin rasps, straining against you. 
“Soft and slow, and deep,” you reply. You sink your mouth onto Minhos cock as Hyunjin pushes into you, inciting a collective moan from each of you simultaneously. 
If someone had asked you where you thought you’d end up when you agreed to work for Lee Minho, you could’ve given so many answers. I’ll end up rich. I’ll end up in jail. I’ll end up living comfortably for the first time in my life. I’ll end up dead. The list of possible answers was long. However, I’ll end up in a state of complete euphoric pleasure, wedged between two men I love, one of which being the biological father to my unborn child, was never, ever something you’d think of, or even dream up for that matter. 
You barely register Hyunjin groggily getting out of the bed to retreat to the bathroom for a quick wash before venturing off to map out drug houses and smoke cigarettes over cards. The warmth of Minhos body has you cocooned in a heavy blanket of peacefulness, his fingers gently scratching against your scalp. Your eyes are so heavy you don’t even attempt to open them. If you could bottle this moment, retreat back to it anytime you feel afraid or anxious, you would do it in a heartbeat. 
“Love you guys,” you hear Hyunjin whisper as he heads out the bedroom door. 
“Love you too,” Minho responds for the both of you, you’re too tired to speak, but you drift off with a smile on your lips. 
🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️
You sleep late and wake up feeling better than you have in several days, though the nausea is there, bubbling under the surface. You decide to make some lemon ginger tea, and get up to do just that. You’ve got things to do today, like try and find an OBGYN who doesn’t know who you are for starters. You plan to set up a space in the kitchen to do some investigating over your tea.
In your kitchen however, sits Hyunjin, Minho, Felix and Changbin, all looking smug and happy with themselves. 
“Did I miss something?” you wonder as you retrieve the items you need for the tea. 
“Parks guy was more than helpful,” Hyunjin smiles, “He had pictures of the warehouse on his phone, we’ve got everything. Room by room.” 
“That’s good?”
Minho grins, “It’s great baby. Not only are we going to get my fucking guns back, but I’m going to burn his shit to the ground, every ounce of Heroin he’s got is going to go up in flames. Let’s try and watch him replace that.” 
“What happens after that?” you ask, a nervous feeling in your stomach. 
“What happens after that is this shit between Kim Taehyung and I ends, for good.”
Endnotes:
This is an extremely trying and scary time for women right now, and I want to make it very clear that I am 100% Pro-Choice 100% of the time. For the sake of this story, my OC is choosing to continue her pregnancy, but there is no deeper meaning or message that I'm trying to send by writing it that way, and given the current state of things, I personally needed people reading this to know that.
This is a shorter chapter because for me this is a very transitional chapter as we prepare to dive a little deeper into the heavier criminal aspects of the story. I wanted to obvs confirm OC's pregnancy since I left Ch. 6 off with a very "is she/isn't she?" type deal. I also wanted to establish Minho and Hyunjins attitude about it all. Some of you may have anticipated our Minho to go completely off the deep end, but in the end, I just didn't want him to be like that. Anyway, now that I've rambled, as usual here's your virtual smooch and I'll tag my beautiful taglist besties in the replies bc that is so much easier for me. Thanks for being kind and patient while I went through my little dark period. 🫂💜
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echantedtoon · 3 days ago
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A Lovers' Circle (Poly Haishira x Reader) Ch17 Setting Hearts A Blaze P3
Taglist: @shadyd3ar @jcrml
@tengensangel @miniverse-zen @mysteri0uz @jjamsbangtan
@the-unknown-fandom
@lavenderdropp @mimisweetz. @purplesoulsapphire
@kksmush @denkpanda18 @whomisi @lessthanimperfect @silver-rin
@namis-noodlebox
@k1ttyluverz @akiramente
@rascalraccoon @ravenclawkae1
@gilded-sunrays @crescent-blades
@yukari1k @bloodymarysgirl21
@artbyrebel @abaker74
Remember if you want to be added to the taglist lemme know
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You didn't want to do this. But they asked to see your aunt. If they found out that you didn't ask her then they'll be upset. But if I DO ask her I know she's going to do something embarrassing like take their cups to read their tea leaves or show up in her fortune teller's outfit. Gods. What if she does the same thing she did when she met Gyomei?!
Your body cringed inwards on itself just picturing your aunt feeling Kyojuro's arm and then declaring he'd make a wonderful husband for someone she knew. Your gut feeling BEGGED you to not go through with it, and you had asked your boyfriend's opinion on the matter. He knew what she was like so surely he'd be against the idea too right?
"They requested her presence didn't they? It would be unkind to everyone if you don't at least tell her about the invitation."
Crap. He was right. Sigh. You'd have to go tell her the next time you saw her, which happened to be the very next day. So with a heavy feeling in your stomach, you drove all the way to her house and forced yourself to climb up the steps and enter the house where you found your aunt trying to manhandle giant boxes of Christmas decorations out of the thin entrance to her attic. 
"They want to what?"
"They wanted to invite you to dinner." You ducked avoiding the top plastic pine needles of a Christmas tree. "To thank you for helping them out. Um..Do want a hand?"
"I'm not old as dirt yet! I can put up a stupid tree." You only watched her struggle with the big thing until she wobbly placed it hard on the floor with a thud before sighing and stepping back to admire her work. "When is this dinner?"
"Um..I think Kyojuro said it was tomorrow night?"
"NO CAN DO, KIDDO!" She pointed up spinning on her heel and walking over to a big box labeled 'ornaments'. "I'm going to a speed dating event! There's only so much of me to go around!"
You sighed. A wave of relief flooding over you for a long moment. "So.. You'll be busy?"
"Honey, broken hearts and lonely souls are an epidemic in the world. When the world's calling me I must answer!"
"Well you didn't have to say it like a line written out of a story."
She waved you off. "Life is a story. Who's writing the story is whoever you decide to give the pencil to." Her arm then made a come here gesture. "Now come help me decorate the place! The halls won't deck themselves."
Everything seemed to go well enough the next day. Of course being a Saturday you had no work, but you still had the project with Giyuu and Shinobu to do due the last day of November which wasn't too far off. You opted to do it early in the morning so you could just go grocery shopping. So you did what you've been doing every morning. Getting up and ready before leaving to meet up with your friends at their house. Just ended up doing an hour of yoga before leaving to go grocery shopping at the local supermarket. Giyuu offered to drive you back but you declined as pretty much everything was within walking distance, even if it was pretty cold out. 
No doubt the first snow wouldn't be too far behind. That's what you thought to yourself as you walked into the thankfully warm grocery store, and grabbed a shopping cart to start pushing it around to start grabbing groceries and things you'd need for dinner tomorrow night, some rice and eel cutlets for unadon. So it really was a surprise for you to just be carting around listening to the generic Christmas music already being played over the loudspeakers and the squeaky wheel of the cart as you pushed it along, stopping every so while to grab milk and eggs and other small things, only to turn the corner into the other aisle and then completely pause.
You blinked before a big smile pressed against your lips at the realization of a familiar face. A man with short ink black hair was standing sideways at the end of the aisle. Shopping basket in one hand while his other ran across canned goods looking at each label for a specific product. Murata didn't see you as you started up towards him.
"Murata!"
"GAH?!" Said man jumped and whirled around as fast as a startled cat but he paused and blinked upon seeing you. "Y/n?!"
You giggled. "Yep! It's me!"
"Don't do that! I could've had a heart attack!"
Despite his frown you giggled again. "Sorry. I haven't seen you in like a month! How have you been?"
"Hmph. I've been fine. Trying to pay for rent and go to classes hasn't been easy to multitask lately is all."
"Oh. I'm so sorry. Your boyfriend ok?"
"Sabito's fine. Like I said, it's just been super busy." Murata paused taking a moment to lean over and look behind you for something. Or really someone. "Is..your boyfriend here too?"
"Gyomei? No. He's helping a friend move some stuff. Why?"
He didn't answer at first. Continuing to look behind you and then behind him as if making sure you both were alone before looking back at you in a dead serious face. "Are you here by yourself?"
"Um.." Your brow rose at him. "Yes? You're being kinda weird, Dude."
"I just wanted to make sure none of...those people were around here." 'Those people'? Who was he talking about? Looking around once more, Murata looked back to your confused face. "Remember when I said I had something important to tell you?" You nodded. You did but he never told you what he wanted to talk about. "I wanted to warn you sooner but you were surrounded by those guys all the time."
"Warn me?" That certainly surprised you. "Warn me about what? And what are you talking about?" 
"I'm talking about the polycule nuts!" You blinked as he groaned. "I'm talking about your boyfriend's boyfriends..and girlfriends!"
"You mean Giyuu and Shinobu?"
"And the rest of them!"
You were surprised. What about your friends warranted Murata wanting to warn you? It confused you to the core. "Why? What's so wrong with them?"
"Um. Everything??" He held up his hands. "When I first saw that guy I thought he looked familiar but I didn't know he was Himejima. If I'd known who it was then I would've told you to not go out with him!"
"Why? What's so wrong with him?"
"How do you not know about their reputation?!" He facepalmed with a loud groan. 
"Murata, WHAT are you talking about?"
"People call them the 'Haishira' on campus." He explained looking up from his hands. "And they're pretty notorious for their lifestyle."
"You mean the fact that they're polyamorous?" Your brow rose with a frown. "Murata, there's lots of people in the world that's polyamorous. I'm not being cheated on or anything if that's what you're worried about. I already know about Gyomei having other partners and I'm fine with that-"
"It's not just that!" He cut you off with a look. "It's already super weird, but it's WAY beyond having like an extra boyfriend or girlfriend on the side! I'm worried about you being around them. Especially dangerous people like Shinazugawa and Iguro Obanai. And that Tengen guy!"
Sanemi and Obanai? Why? What was wrong with them? And Tengen?  Your questions were answered as Murata continued talking in your silence.
"Both of them have got a bad reputation on campus and for good reason. They're always getting into fights and Sanemi sent a guy to the hospital his first year of Uni just cuz someone hit on his girlfriend! Everyone's scared of them cuz they're loose cannons! Not to mention that Tengen guy is like the biggest womanizer on campus! He's always flirting with people and winking and posing naked for the art classes-"
"Don't... people usually volunteer as nude models for art class all the time so the students can practice drawing anatomy?"
"That doesn't change the fact that they're all super weird to be around! Look! I'm like REALLY worried about you here! And as your friend, I'm begging you to stay away from those guys! They're trouble and there's a reason why people avoid them!"
Haishira? Avoiding them? Well you knew from Gyomei that many people tended to opt out of dating him due to his blindness or after learning about his orientation, but you never heard anything about them all having any kind of 'reputation'. The closest thing to that is when you had encountered Jake a second time at the pub. One of his friends had seemed to recognize Sanemi causing the group of them to flee the scene.
But Sanemi dangerous?
Not to you. He'd been nothing but respectful and passive towards most people outside of his relationships you've seen him interact with. He wasn't rude to anyone that didn't decide to poke him with a stick or decide to be rude or try to cause trouble to someone he seemed to care for. Most of the time around other people he just seemed neutral. Obanai...well you didn't know him too well. You've only spoken to him a handful of times but he didn't seem like someone who would harm someone on a whim either. As for Tengen, he was flirty whenever you spoke to him but that seemed more like his personality than him going around womanizing people.
"They never acted that way when I was around them."
"That's because you're dating their boyfriend! Which is a sentence I never thought I would ever say! *Sigh* Look. I just don't want to see you get hurt again!" His hand found your shoulder and a look of concern came over him. "I'd ask you to break up with him but I don't know if I'm in a position to do that. So instead I'm gonna warn you."
You still stared at him for a long, silent moment before sighing. "Murata, I appreciate your concern and I'm glad I have such a good friend. But I'm happy. Gyomei's not perfect, far from it actually, but for the first time I'm seeing someone who makes me happy and I'm worried about if he's going to ghost me or is secretly married. He makes me happy, and I actually like making friends with them. They're good people despite what rumors or people say. You don't have to worry about me."
Murata slowly sighed again deflating with a nod. "I had a feeling you'd probably say something like that. But...Would you at least please, PLEASE promise me you'll be careful?"
You smiled at him. "I promise but you don't have to worry about me. I'll be fine."
**************************************
You didn't know what to feel for the rest of the day. Running into Murata had left a bad taste in your mouth in your otherwise happy mood. It's not that you believed the rumors that were repeated to you in worry by him. Of course you didn't believe Sanemi was actually dangerous or any of the other ridiculous things Murata warned you about, but there was something bugging you.
Rumors usually didn't start out of no where.
Usually they were started by someone or they were based off something that did happen or sometimes a bit of both. So now which of the three was it? You debated calling Sanemi and asking him yourself but it would've been too awkward to just ask if he'd ever beat up someone and put him in the hospital. So instead you just went home and put your groceries away in some attempt to get your mind off the fact despite it still bugging you. Your day had gone by normally then but you still didn't shake the feeling of curiosity surrounding it all. In fact you nearly forgotten about the time because you were so distracted by it all. The clock showed up five p.m and the dinner was supposed to be at six.
OH CRAP!! YOU WERE GONNA BE LATE!!
It was a rush to shower and throw on a cute sweater before grabbing what you needed and running out of the door and towards the restaurant Kyojuro had insisted on you coming too. Luckily you knew exactly what restaurant it was. It was the new one Mitsuri wanted to go to but couldn't because it had been closed. It was right across from the park and the park wasn't too far away from your house as well. 
Of course the afternoon was cold and nearly dark as the days grew shorter this time of year, but you held your purse halfway in your teeth as you yanked your coat over your shoulders and hoped the wind didn't smear your makeup. You were going to be late. You were going to be late. Oh you hoped they weren't going to be mad at you for being late. The trip as the sun set quickly took you along the sidewalks on your usual route to the university only to go straight through the park as some kind of short cut and straight to the streets and buildings on the other side. Where you went to was the first big building  that let delicious smelling food waft on the breeze. That should be the one.
With a brisk pace you made towards the older styled building and opened the front door setting off a bell above your head, and a wave of warn air washed over your cold skin. Immediately after you stepped in, someone else was standing right there in front of you with a wide smile. 
"Greetings!," he greeted you with a smile on his customer service face and a waiter's suit slapped on his body. "Do you have a reservation, Ma'am?"
"Um." You pushed the hair from your face attempting to smooth it over from the wind blowing it about. "N-No."
"Oh. I'm afraid I can't seat you without a reservation."
"I'm actually meeting someone here. Uh..Rengoku?"
"Rengoku? Hm. Let's see." From his podium thing he looked down at what you assumed was a check book. "Ah, yes. Table fourteen. Of course." With a gesture of his arm he pointed towards the inside massive room of tables. "Please follow me."
You did hoping you didn't look too out of place amongst the fancy furnishings and dressed up people. Until you spotted a familiar face and head of red hair. ...And a very familiar sounding voice.
"Umai!....Umai!....Umai!!"
You heard him before you saw him. Following him to the table in question revealed three identical figures of long red hair. One of which was a young man shoving pieces of wagyu steak pieces into his mouth and yelling out each time he took a bite. Yep. That was definitely Kyojuro alright.
The worker stopped behind Kyojuro whom had his back towards you but gained the attention of his parents. Shinjuro and Ruka if you remembered right from the party. "Excuse me, S-"
"UMAI!!"
Both the worker and yourself jumped back as Kyojuro just whirled around to surprise both of you. His wide grin only instantly widened more and his eyes brightened up when he saw you standing there. 
"Y/N!!" Kyojuro announced loudly catching the attention of more tables turning to look towards the loud voice. "You've made it!"
With a blink or two you slowly relaxed back and awkwardly nodded. "Um. Y-Yeah. Sorry I'm late. I got..distracted."
"Nonsense! You arrived just in time!" With a scoot over, he easily moved his plate over and gestured to the place next to him. "Come sit! Join us and have something to eat!"
Taking the opportunity to make this less awkward, you quickly sat down next to Kyojuro and across from his father. The older man sat there with a neutral expression on his face as he watched you sit down in front of him. With a smile you turned to Kyojuro whom smiled widely and softly at you. A little strange but you figured it was out of gratitude for what you and your aunt did for them. 
"I'm glad you could make it!," he started with a bright tone, "With your busy schedule I was afraid you wouldn't make it."
You waved him off. "Oh no. I wouldn't miss this! It was really nice of your family to invite me for dinner."
"Indeed! Speaking of which, I don't see your aunt anywhere? Is she running late as well?," he asked looking over your shoulder and around the restaurant in search of anyone else coming towards their table. 
"I'm sorry but she couldn't make it since she's working tonight."
"That's a shame." Mrs. Rengoku smiled at you softly. "I was so looking forward to meeting her, but maybe next time. However I'm happy to make your acquaintance again. You're Y/n correct?"
You nodded. "That's me. I'm happy to hear that you're situation has improved!"
"Yes! My husband and I are very grateful! Thank you!" ....Ms. Ruka turned to her husband before lightly bumping her elbow into his arm.
He jolted turning to her. "What?" Ruka motioned her eyes towards you as he stared. "Oh. Right." He sighed before turning to you with a semi frown. "Thank you I suppose but I didn't need any help. It was nothing I couldn't have solved myself.. Eventually."
"There's no need to thank me really!" You held up your hands. "I'm just glad you all are doing better!"
"Well the least we can do is buy you dinner."
"Oh, you don't have to. I can pay for my own food."
You stopped blinking up as Kyojuro placed a hand on yours which he was still holding up. You blinked again looking between him and where he held your hand before he spoke up again.
"I insist. My treat. One meal is the least I can do to pay you back for all the kindness that you shown me."
"You?"
"Uh! M-My family too!," he quickly corrected. "I truly do insist! Please get whatever you'd like and I'll take care of it!"
"Well...I usually don't like taking other people's money like this."
"Then just take it as paying you back for those delicious cookies you've made us and we can call it even!"
You hummed again thinking it over. "Mmm...Ok. But just this once."
He beamed. "OF COURSE!! You won't regret it! Order whatever you'd like!"
"Thank you!" ....You looked down. "Um. Kyojuro." He hummed in question. "You're still holding my hand."
Immediately his eyes shot down and a bright pink color slapped across his upon the realization. "AH!! APOLOGIES!!" He immediately cried out loudly dropping your hand and making his mother giggle, his brother blink, and his father sigh and roll his eyes.
The dinner was nice. Casual even. Nothing really strange about it. You all talked about where everyone worked, what Ms. Ruka did as a calligraphy teacher, how Kyojuro came to work part time at the local shelter, a little bit about Senjuro's studies, and at one point Kyojuro asked how the project with Giyuu and Shinobu was going. Just a casual, normal family conversation...Minus yourself as you weren't a part of the Rengoku Family.
Slowly things came to a close. You did try to one more time pay for the small meal you had ordered but Kyojuro had pushed your card away and slapped down enough money to easily pay for both of your meals plus a tip for the waiter....
It was odd though. 
His parents paid for their own and his brother's meals. Wasn't he paying for everyone? You brushed it off in the moment as you all made for the exit and then as you turned to bid them goodnight, Kyojuro turned to you sharply.
"Let me walk you home." You blinked at him. "It's getting dark and I'm sure Gyomei would appreciate that I didn't let his girlfriend walk home alone one dark winter night."
"What about your home? Isn't it in the opposite direction?"
"Haha! I don't live with my parents and my home is much closer to yours than theirs. I'll be fine!"
You were a bit confused with the sudden gesture, but Gyomei and even Giyuu once or twice had walked you home before so Kyojuro walking you home wasn't a bad thing. "Ok. If you're sure."
That's when he offered his arm out to you taking you aback again. Wasn't expecting him to do that. Was it ok to accept? After debating on it for a moment, you accepted his arm and (after thanking his parents for dinner and telling them all good bye-) you both walked back towards the park. It was mostly silent now in the dark with the night sky overhead. The only lights in the park being the stars and street lamps. Eerie. You were kinda glad you accepted Kyojuro's offer after all.
Midway through the park you slowly glanced up at him. He wasn't looking at you and instead continuing to walk and look around with you leading him towards your house....Maybe..HE had answers to your problem?
"Kyojuro?" He snapped to you immediately with a questioning him. It was kinda spooky how fast he reacted. Hesitating you looked away from him. "Can I..ask you something?"
"BUT OF COURSE!!," His loud voice echoed over the park. "Ask away!"
You hesitated again feeling a bit guilty. "Well...N-Not too long ago I ran into someone else who goes to the university." You decided it was best not to throw Murata under the metaphorical bus and keep his name out of it. "And...they told me some stuff about you guys-"
You stopped. Well Kyojuro immediately holted to a stop yanking you back too. The sudden jolt had you blinking, looking at him in instinct only to pause at the way he was staring at you. Still smiling but it looked more...serious.
"I see..", he slowly said after a moment, "What kind of 'stuff' did they tell you?"
"Oh..N-Nothing I actually believe of course." You quickly added holding up your free hand. "It's just some rumors."
"What kind of 'rumors'?"
You winced shrinking up a little bit and looking away again. "Well...T-They said that...Sanemi and Obanai were dangerous- Again I don't believe that! And t-t-that Te-Tengen was a...playboy I guess- Again I don't believe any of it!" You again looked at him nervously. "I-It's just something that someone else told me and I-I thought you guys should know about it is all!"
.... Kyojuro blinked. "Oh. Is that all?" You were again taken aback when he threw his head back and laughed loudly. His laughing echoing off the wind before he looked at you. "Those old rumors again. You have nothing to worry about." He assured you waving a hand. "Those are baseless rumors people had made up over misunderstandings and bad intentions!"
A sigh of relief left you despite it all. Yeah. You already figured as much, but hearing someone else confirm it put you at ease. "I figured that already... Although there is one more thing bugging me."
His head tilted. "And what might that be?"
"This person also told me Sanemi got into a really bad fight with someone who ended up in the hospital." You couldn't shake the way those men literally feared Sanemi at the pub. Something clearly happened. "Is that true?'
Kyojuro stared at you still, looked you up and down, before sighing. "It is but it's exaggerated way out of context. What really happened was someone else tried to kiss Hinatsuru without her consent at a party. When they wouldn't leave her alone, Sanemi more or less punched him in the face."
"So..he did make someone go to the hospital?"
"Well I suppose technically but the only thing he had was a broken nose. People like to make it seem like he had beaten the man into a coma but it's simply just a matter of him defending someone he cares about."
"Like he did for me."
Kyojuro smiled wider. "Yes. Exactly! You get it! Is that everything that concerns you?"
You nodded in relief. "Yes it does. Thank you, Kyojuro. It's been really comforting. I guess it goes to show there's still things to learn about you guys."
A glimmer of excitement formed in his eyes. "Then you should come celebrate with Tengen next weekend!"
You blinked. "Huh?"
"There's this cloud we're celebrating Mario's birthday at! Since you'd like to learn more about us you should come along and spend time with everyone!"
"I-...I don't know. I haven't even been invited." 
"I'll throw the idea their way! If they say yes, you should come! It'll be lots of fun!"
"Well..Maybe. I'll have to think about it first!"
"SPLENDID!! Now come! It's getting colder and as much as I enjoy the beautiful night, Gyomei wouldn't be happy if I allowed you to catch a cold."
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sturnswrites · 1 day ago
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drenched in us
Matt Sturniolo x Fem!Reader
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⤳ angst, fluff
⤳ you and matt aren't officially dating but after you see him flirting with another girl at a party, you're forced to question your feelings for each other.
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The party was everything you hated—loud music, sweaty bodies, and fake smiles plastered on unfamiliar faces. You hadn’t even wanted to come, but Matt had begged you. It’ll be fun, y/n, he’d said, his signature grin making it impossible to say no.
But now, you regretted it.
You leaned against the wall in the corner of the living room, nursing your cup of a barely-touched drink, eyes scanning the crowd. You were trying to find him—not because you needed him, or so you told yourself, but because he’d asked you to be here. You’d shown up for him, not for this mess. The least he could do was not leave you alone to fend off boredom and the occasional sloppy flirtation from random guys.
Then you spotted him.
Matt stood across the room, his face illuminated by the flickering neon lights. His messy brown hair was perfectly tousled, his shoulders loose, and that stupid smirk you couldn’t get out of your head was aimed at her.
You didn’t recognize her but she was gorgeous. Laughing at whatever joke he’d just cracked, she leaned in close, her manicured hand grazing his tattoo covered arm.
You froze as the world seemed to stop. 
Your stomach twisted, tightening with every second he didn’t pull back or look uncomfortable. In fact, he looked like he was enjoying it. That smirk wasn’t one you saw often—it wasn’t the soft, teasing one he gave you when you tried to argue about something dumb, or the one he used to get you to smile when you were in a bad mood. This was different.
And it broke something inside you.
The worst part? You didn’t even have a right to feel this way. Matt wasn’t yours. The two of you weren’t dating, weren’t anything official.
But you couldn’t take it anymore. You slammed your cup down on the nearest surface and pushed through the crowd, weaving past people who were too drunk to notice your stormy expression. You needed to get as far away as you could from the boy before something more unraveled in front of your face. 
By the time you reached the front door, the cool night air combined with the rain that had started to fall hit your face, but it did nothing to cool the fire raging inside you.
“Y/n!”
You knew that voice from anywhere. His voice. Stopping you dead in your tracks. 
You turned, your heart pounding as Matt stepped out onto the porch. His brows were furrowed, his chest rising and falling like he’d run after you. “What’s going on?”
“What’s going on?” you repeated, bitterness dripping from your words. “You tell me, Matt. Because from where I was standing, it looked like you were having the time of your life with her.” 
His confused expression faltered for a moment. “Are you—wait.” He stepped closer, his voice dropping. “Were you…jealous?”
“Yes!” you snapped, your voice breaking, wet streaks streaming down your face, you couldn’t tell what was tears or rain. The word tumbled out before you could stop it, raw and unfiltered. “Of course I was jealous! Do you even get how hard it is for me to see you with someone else? Whatever we have right now is not enough, Matt. I can’t keep doing this—watching you look at someone the way you look at me.”
The words hung in the air between you, heavy and undeniable. Suddenly the roles had reversed and now Matt was the one who was frozen. 
Matt’s face softened, his wide eyes searching yours as the rain dripped from his lashes. “Y/n…”
“No,” you interrupted, your voice trembling. “I mean it, Matt. I need you to make this official. Right now. Because I can’t keep pretending this doesn’t hurt. You can’t keep acting like I don’t feel anything, like you don’t feel anything. You take me to dinner, hold me until I fall asleep every night, hell, I’ve met your parents, but you can’t even make me your girlfriend.” 
The rain fell harder, the sound drowning out the muffled music from the party.
Matt took a step closer, his eyes locked on yours. “I wasn’t flirting with her because I wanted to,” he said, his voice soft but firm. “I was trying to distract myself. Because every time I look at you, I want things I’m scared to mess up.”
His words made your breath hitch, your anger faltering under the weight of his confession.
“But I can’t do this anymore either,” he continued, rain streaming down his face as he ran a hand through his wet hair. “I want you. I’ve always wanted you. I was just too scared to ruin what we have.”
Your lips parted, but no words came out. You didn’t know what to say, how you felt. 
Then, without warning, Matt stepped forward and cupped your face with his hands. His palms were cold from the rain, but his touch was warm, grounding.
“I’m sorry for making you feel like you weren’t enough,” he murmured. His voice cracked, a vulnerability in his tone that you’d never heard before. “You’ve always been more than enough for me.”
Before you could respond, his lips were on yours, crashing into you with all the emotion he’d held back for so long.
The kiss was everything—soft and desperate, warm and urgent despite the cold rain pouring down. It was everything you’d wanted to hold on to forever but never thought you could have.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours. His brown eyes searched yours, and for the first time that night, you saw no hesitation, no fear.
“No more distracting myself from how I really feel. Let’s do this,” he whispered, his lips curving into a small smile. “Officially. You and me.”
A watery laugh escaped you as you nodded, tears mixing with the rain on your face. “You and me,” you echoed, the words feeling lighter and truer than anything you’d said in weeks.
And just like that, the storm between you two finally passed.
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hiii first fan fic bare with me I don’t really know what I’m doing 😀
⭒ margot
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awkward-fink · 17 hours ago
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„Love you, please take care of yourself.” You say, your fingers clutching onto the doorframe so hard you would surely leave imprints behind, but you didn’t care in this moment. Because in front of you stands your husband, lopsided smile on his face, clean shaven and his mohawk freshly touched up by your hands and his careful instructions. "Love ye back, hen. Ah'll be back quicker than ye can believe." He murmurs to you, accent thick and his eyes bright.
You don’t want him to go, you don’t want him to leave you behind again and do something crazy he will tell you all about later (or Gaz will spill the beans, like the time your husband decided to nearly drop a half of a warehouse on his head! Thank you Gaz.).
“It’s jist three months, gie or tak a wee bit, love. Ah’ll be back sune.” “I’m gonna miss you so much, Love.” “Ah'm gonnae miss ye even mair.” “Did you pack the lunch I ma-“ you cant end your sentence as your husband leans into your face, his lips warm and inviting and firm on your own, shutting up every train of thought you had as he kisses you breathless and stupid.
You only remember after you had closed the front door, calmed your racing heart and looked into the kitchen. And there it was, the small package of sandwiches you had made for your husband to take with him, untouched and sloppily wrapped, just like you had placed them there. And the lunch you had made, spaghettis with tomato sauce, was also untouched. Your heart sank.
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“-and then he just goes off to wherever and leaves behind the meal I made for him! This isn’t fair, Leonora!” you pant at the end of your tirade, angrily huffing and growling as you drink the tea your friend and neighbor made in one go, nearly burning your tongue in the process.
“Oh dear, well, honey, how do I say this…” your elderly neighbor wiggled her glasses with one finger, tilting her head from left to right, the curls on top of her head not even moving once. (Soap had once joked that Leonora put so much gel and hairspray into her mountain of curls, she could headbutt any men or women into submission with only one headshake.) “Your food is…” Your shoulders shake and sag as you watch your friend try to think of a way to describe your food in a way that would not totally mortify you or send your soul into hell.
“Bad? A disaster? Hellish? Even a demon would recoil from that torture?” “No, Honey- what I meant to say was, that you have a talent.” Your posture straightens and your eyes glimmer in hope- “You have the talent to burn water.” – only to turn watery and gloomy as your friend goes on with her words.
“That’s not nice…” “But sadly true.”
Leonora leans over the table to pat your shoulder gently, giving you a smile like only a loving grandmother can give. Your eyes turn towards the forgotten sandwiches, which looked even sadder than before and yes, maybe it smelled a little off, but it surely couldn’t be that bad…
You both watch as the single cucumber slice slowly slides down at the side, giving a squelching plopping sound as it hit the table. There is silence for a few seconds before you turn hurt and sad eyes on Leonora, who only pats your shoulders again.
“Kyle told me, that Johnny prefers the mess hall food over mine. The mess hall! No one likes the food from the mess hall!” you are close to sobbing, clutching the mug of tea to your chest like a lifeline.
“Oh dear... Well, there is one thing we can do.” “There is?” “I meet my other friends every Tuesday night for a bit of cards and cooking. How about you come beforehand, and I can teach you some recipes? And the base techniques of cooking?” “You would do that for me?” “Yes, dear. Can’t have your man avoiding home because you cant cook. Think about the children you will have to feed someday!” “You are a saint! Thank you! Please, I beg of you, help me!”
You felt better now, Leonora would help you, she would rescue your culinary skills from the depths of nothing they were at and rise you up towards normal housewife-level meals, you were sure! This would be a piece of cake!
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IT WAS NOT A PIECE OF CAKE! Leonora was menace, a demon from hell! She was a strict and harsh teacher, and you lost count of all the times she hit your arse with a wooden cooking spoon. It felt like you lived through a montage of training! It started with only Tuesdays and then Thursdays as well, and Sundays to help with baking for church! And then Leonoras friends, a gang of grannies, took it upon themselves to further your training!
You chopped and sliced and diced and julienned until your hands could do it perfectly in your sleep (“That is not uniform, this piece of carrot it slightly off! Again!” Julia barked at you, the waif of a woman poking you with her bony fingers until you got it right).
You helped with shopping, hauling load after load of ingredients, having to run back to the shops every time you got some of the listed items wrong (“This is a bitter melon and not a cucumber, run again little chicken, run again!” Tia Zia cackled after you, sending you right back out into the rain again to run to the store before it closed in 5 minutes).
Soon you were frying (“Make it hotter, the potatoes will soak up all the oil if its not hot enough!”), baking (“Is that salt in the cookies? Honey where was your head?”), kneading Pasta from scratch and finally, you cooked a whole meal for the gang of furious grannies and felt like you were back in school, in your exams, your heart racing as the committee of specialists discussed your results before turning to you with hard eyes and grim faces.
“Dear, this food is-“your heart sank and raced at the same time, your stomach dropping as Aunty Angela cracked her neck as she tried to look at you sternly, “this food is good. It is edible and even tastes better than what my niece Lilly makes. Congratulations!”
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“You sure you don’t want to go to another diner before I get you home to your wife?” Johnny snorted and rubbed his overfilled stomach. He was sure he was having a foodbaby growing in there after this morning and this midday. His teammates had stuffed him with pancakes and hashbrowns and every other item of breakfast they could get their hands on and then they did it again at lunch! He was so full; he would hurl if he had to eat another piece of food!
“Naw, it’s awright. Ah’m fair burst, ah cannae eat another thing. An’ Gaz promised he’d send me a care package in a few days.” He smiles at his Captain, rubbing his bulging stomach and fighting down a burp that was stuck in his throat. “Yeah well... next mission is not so far away, no worry. And Ghost packed the rest of the MRE’s into your bag for emergencies.” “Ta, Captain. She's a braw wife in everythin' else, but her cookin' is…” he falls silent and only grins. And then the car is already coming to a stop and his heart beats faster in his chest. He is so close to take his wife into his arms again, to kiss her silly and then sweep her off her feet and into the bedroom, where- “Cheers fur the lift, Captain. Right nice o’ ye!.” “Was on the way. See you soon, stay strong.” “A'll dae that! See ye in a few days tae weeks!" Johnny gives a sloppy salute before rolling out of the car, dragging his luggage out from the backseat to lug it right after him.
And then he is off, loping up the way towards the front door, which is already opening and his wife, the love of his life stands before him, her eyes shining and her hair glossy and her skin looking silky smooth and soft and he can’t wait to wrap his rough hands around her and sink into her softness, be back home again.
He doesn’t remember what he said, or what she wanted to say, his lips are on hers, his arms hold her tight to himself and they stumble inside. And then he comes to a stop, his nose twitching as he sniffs the air, his head turning towards the kitchen. “Sointhing smells awfy guid.” He murmurs and stares at you as if you had grown a second head. “Thank you, it’s a new recipe I tried.” He swallows, his mouth watering. His eyes roaming over her happy glowing face. “Ye... ye cooked this?" “Yeah. And don’t worry, I followed the recipe to a T.” You beam at him, your hands stroking over his arms and shoulders and down his torso, making sure he was alright, holding onto him with delight and happiness radiating from you.
And Johnny, still filled with food and stuffed to the gills with cheap cheeseburgers from lunch, takes another whiff before a soft, but cautious smile steals over his lips. “Ah could dae with some food."
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He must have died. It tasted great.
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xoluvx · 2 days ago
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lecture; b.eilish ❤︎₊ ⊹
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she’d been eyeing you the whole lecture. nerdy little glasses falling down the bridge of her nose. plaid shirt hanging loose over her pants. pants she was constantly fixing like she was packing. god, you really wished she was, but that wasn't something you were going to openly admit. you also weren't going to admit that you'd been quivering in your chair each time she flipped her hair to the side. clenching your thighs each time she bit her lip in concentration.
whatever the professor was saying was totally irrelevant now. you were feigning interest. the only interesting thing was her. you wanted her to wrap her hand around your neck. grip it tight like she did her pen. you wanted her to bite your lip the way she was biting hers. you wanted her to bend you over the desk. show you what she was hiding under her pants and fuck you into oblivion with those fucking glasses you just couldn't stand seeing her in-
"hey," her voice rung in your ears as you blinked away the fantasy. she hovered over you. classroom empty. body so close you could feel her breathing down your neck. your heart was beating rapidly. pussy throbbing just from the sight. you unraveled your legs subconsciously as if offering yourself up to her. she reached down and your eyes followed her hand carefully. lips parting. "my pen," she said getting up twirling the pen in her fingers. you swallowed at the realization. she was grabbing her fucking pen and your legs were wide open as if she really was just going to get on her knees and-
"see you around," she whispered giving you a crooked smile as she bit her lip, her stupid fucking lip with her twinkling blue eyes, leaving you stranded in the empty classroom.
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derww · 11 hours ago
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DEVOTIONS WEEK DAY 2: POTIONS/DEATH
CW: Suicide attempt, suicidal ideations, mental breakdown, ableism, DDDNE
This is the first thing Zam does when he realizes that everything he has done this season has been absolutely useless: he kills himself.
Okay, he tries: he abruptly turns away, throws off all his armor, takes a few springy steps, and then jumps down. The height is small, but he has ridiculously few hearts, so it's enough...
A moment before landing something breaks on top of his head, and the fall does not cause any damage. The nasty swamp slime gets into his mouth, and he spits it out, at the same time shaking off the glass stuck in his hair.
– What do you think is the probability that he has milk? – Pyro asks Spoke, tossing another splash bottle in his hand. Zam stares at him. How the fuck did he even hit? He is disgusting and wet. He has milk, but only in the enderchest, and he is not stupid enough to believe that he will be given time to drink it. Or that it would make any difference.
– I don't know, man, – Spoke spreads his hands, – like, high? Doesn't matter. Let's continue my supervillain speech. Time is not infinite, you know.
He doesn't want to continue the conversation. He pukes on the spot. He reeks of corpse rot. He doesn't want to be here. He doesn't want to be anywhere at all. Oh, God, can he just fucking die already?
Mapicc rolls his eyes. He looks annoyed, but not surprised. He and Spoke exchange understanding glances. Zam mechanically wipes his mouth from vomit, staring past them. There are too many things around. Everything is too bright and distinct. He wants to pierce through his belly with a sword, and he is horrified to realize that this will not help.
They- they don't even laugh at his insignificance and helplessness, they see it as an expected hindrance, as something that will happen when you tell the PrinceZam about the impending apocalypse. For some reason, it's so much worse. The vomit is creeping up in his throat again.
Step. Another. Third. This time he jumps into the void – because the Abyss kills anything, and even if not, suffocating in the infinity is still better than being next to them. That's the only thing he wants right now – to die.
He barely does not manage to reach y 0 when he is teleported back to their feet, and he falls to the knees. He violently coughs up bile. Deep disgust fills every cell of his body.
– Listen, – Mapicc says wearily, – let's skip this part. Yes, Spoke has backdoored the server, yes, he has an OP, and yes, no mundane plots have any meaning anymore. Wormhole will open in a week. Are you with us?
He lowers his head. His hands are shaking. He wants to wash himself. He wants to be anywhere else. He wants warm clothes and soft food. He wants to go home and bake a pumpkin pie. He wants to kill himself.
– Earth to the PrinceZam,– Spoke snaps fingers in front of his face, – bro, hang off. I need your answer. I'm only giving you a choice anyway because you're different. Be faster.
He opens his mouth and stutters and gasps. Nothing in his body works properly. For the first time in months, he can't say anything. Why-why at all. What's the difference. They can't make his life worse. They won't be able to mess up any more. They are not-
A blurry image with black and red appears in front of his face. Black hair. A pale face. A red hoodie. Bandana. Horns. Zam doesn't have to think about it to know that it's Mapicc.
– Listen, – Mapicc's voice comes to him as if from under water, - I know it's hard, – no, he has no idea, – and really, really sucks. but this is the situation we find ourselves in now. Right now, you don't have to do much, right now you just need to make one decision. Okay?
Something inhuman is bursting out of him. He's throwing up again. Mapicc sighs.
– Hey, – he says too calmly, – it's hard, I know. But not worse than the end of season two, right? – much, much worse, – just take a deep breath, exhale, give yourself time to think and make a decision, okay? And we'll leave you alone.
He can't. He can't. He is not-
– If I refuse, – he says, dead–straight, – will you let me die?
– No, of course not, – Spoke's voice comes from somewhere to the side, and he doesn't have enough strength to turn his head, – why did we try otherwise? Wait for the Wormhole, and I'll think about it. Maybe I'll give you endless effects, or maybe I'll let you die in peace. Who knows? I haven't decided yet.
– Don't listen to him, – Mapicc interrupts, irritated, – don't think about it. Just decide whether you want to destroy this world or fight for its preservation. If you want to keep it, the defenders will pick you up sooner or later. If you want to destroy it, you will become the third with me and Spoke. We will work together. Like before.
He's looking past them. His heart is beating too fast.
– if I join you, – he says dryly, – will you let me die?
– When you will finish your work? – Spoke giggles, – yeah, sure, why not. It wouldn't matter.
He swallows a lump. His throat hurts. Mapicc seems to be looking right at him. He's suffocating. He doesn't want any of this.
– Okay, – he says in the end, – I'll help you. And then you'll let me go.
Spoke grins.
– And that's the deal! Good job, PrinceZam. That's more like it.
At least Mapicc and I will be friends again, he thinks detachedly. At least there's anything good about it. Maybe I can get over it. Even if it's only to get the fuck out later.
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luvismenu · 1 day ago
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Something Stupid — Kim Taehyung One-Shot
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navi ,, m.list ,,
warnings: ANGST. unspoken love, one-sided love, co-workers, Taehyung's POV, tae doesn't speak much, he's just a little sad guy. lowercase intended.
wc: 3.6k
pairing (well not really): quiet taehyung x fem!reader
a/n: apology one-shot for discontinuing the art of love 😞 (worst kind of apology ik but idc huhu suffer w me <3) i teared up writing this. don't let this flop i swear 🫵🏼
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November 21
a year ago.
it was the day i met you.
it was your first day at work. you were glowing, so full of excitement, and so happy to be starting your dream job. i could tell from the way your eyes lit up that you were ready for this, ready for everything.
i remember how i welcomed you, and you looked at me, and you smiled.
“thank you! i’m ___, nice to meet you.”
there was something in the way you smiled that made my heart skip. it was simple, but it made me freeze for a moment. i couldn’t help but stutter.
“i-i… i’m kim taehyung, nice to meet you too…”
you nodded, still wearing that bright smile, and then turned to greet the others. and i just stood there, watching you.
i didn’t realize it at the time, but i couldn’t stop stealing glances at you. the way you came in every morning, the way you greeted everyone with a bright “good morning!” and how you always wished everyone to have a great day, no matter what.
even though we barely talked, even though you never really spoke to me much, it still made my day. just seeing you, hearing your voice, feeling the warmth you radiated. it was genuine, simple, but it made everything feel a little better, a little easier to bear.
November 28
you baked cookies, and handed out small bags, each tied with a neat bow. you didn’t miss anyone in the office, not even me. you made sure to thank everyone for making you feel so welcome.
everyone was happy to receive them, and so was i. but i overheard a few people talking behind your back, saying you were trying too hard, that it was all a little much.
but when i looked at you, all i could see was that you just wanted to fit in, wanted to make everyone around you feel comfortable. i saw it in the way your eyes shined, even though they were tired, like you were trying to prove something.
your dark circles told me you probably stayed up all night baking those cookies. i wanted to tell you how much i appreciated it, how i felt like you didn’t need to push yourself so hard. you were perfect just the way you were.
“i hope you like them, mr. kim! let me know if you prefer chocolate cookies, i have those too!”
but i couldn’t bring myself to say it.
“these are fine…”
December 10
the office holiday party was approaching, and the excitement was tangible. decorations were put up, and the air smelled sweet. everyone was talking about their plans, about what they were wearing, about who was bringing what dish.
and there you were, always the one to make sure everything was perfect, organizing the little details, ensuring no one felt left out. you were always so kind, always so giving.
i watched you from across the room, helping the others with the setup, your smile lighting up the entire space. you seemed so at ease, so comfortable in your role, but i could still see the exhaustion hidden behind your cheerful demeanor. the way your shoulders dropped slightly when you thought no one was looking, the way your eyes would gloss over for a second before you’d catch yourself and smile again.
i wanted to say something to you, tell you how much i admired your strength, how much i wished you’d let yourself rest, how i’d do anything to make things easier for you.
but i never did.
instead, i just kept watching, my words trapped in my chest, my heart pounding every time you passed by, hoping maybe, just maybe, you’d catch a glimpse of the way i looked at you.
"mr.kim, can you pass me the tape?"
“yes,”
December 25
i was walking to a store. christmas had never been anything special for me, but today felt different. i wanted to get you something, something to show you that you matter to me. that you’re someone special.
i found a little keychain; red flowers. when i first saw it, it reminded me of you. so bright and beautiful. i thought, “maybe you’d like this.”
as i walked out of the store, the cold air hit me. it was christmas, so the streets were packed with people rushing around. but i wasn’t in any hurry. i just wanted to buy you something, to let you know how much i appreciated everything about you.
then, i saw you.
a figure i recognized, standing by the candy store, looking at candy canes. the world seemed to slow as i watched you. you were wearing a soft, fluffy coat, a muffler wrapped around your head, your hair dusted with snow, your cheeks flushed from the cold. you were smiling at the candy canes like they were the most magical thing in the world.
i stopped, not sure if i should approach. i had the keychain in my hand, clutching it tight. my heart raced at the thought of finally giving you something, of finally telling you how much you mean to me.
i thought, this was it.
but then, i saw him.
someone else, someone taller, someone who looked like he belonged with you. he walked up to you, took your hand, and smiled at you. your eyes lit up when you saw him.
i froze.
my stomach twisted when he leaned down and kissed you. i watched you smile against his lips, and i could see the happiness in your eyes.
i stood there, completely still.
the moment i’d imagined for so long, the one where i’d finally be brave enough to talk to you, to give you the gift and the words that had been stuck inside me. but it wasn’t for me.
it was for him.
i turned away, my grip loosening around the keychain. i don’t know why i thought you’d feel the same way. i shouldn’t have been surprised, but it hurt. it hurt more than i could have ever expected.
as i walked, i bumped into someone. the sudden jolt made the keychain slip from my hand, and it fell to the ground with a soft clink.
in a panic, i reached out, my hand stretching toward the tiny flowers that had somehow come to mean so much to me. but the crowd was relentless, people moving quickly, oblivious to anything but getting to their next destination.
someone stepped on it.
then another.
and another.
the red flowers, so beautiful just moments ago, was crushed underfoot. pieces of it scattered across the pavement, the petals breaking apart with each step
i stood there, helpless, my fingers trembling as i watched it all happen. i wanted to scream, to shout, to stop the world from moving so fast. but all i could do was watch the remnants of the flower.
i should’ve known.
you were too perfect.
too perfect for someone like me.
January 23
"mr. kim?"
i looked up, surprised to hear my name. it was you, standing there with a soft smile on your face.
“yes, ms. ___?”
you smiled again, this time a little warmer.
"you can call me ___," you said gently, as if you were giving me permission to speak to you like a normal person.
i nodded, too nervous to say anything else. i wanted to tell you that you didn’t have to call me mr. kim, that taehyung was fine, but the words never left my lips. they got stuck somewhere in my chest.
“me and my friends are going out for lunch, and i wanted to invite you too,” you said, still smiling.
"m-me?" my voice caught, the surprise clear in my tone. i couldn’t understand why you’d want me to join you. i barely ever spoke to you outside of work, and i could never bring myself to be as casual as everyone else.
“you always work alone, well i am sure you prefer it that way..” you chuckled. “i don’t know, i just thought you might enjoy spending time with us.” you looked at me with those hopeful eyes, as if you were waiting for me to say yes. as if you genuinely wanted me there.
it felt like the moment when i first met you all over again. everything became still. my heart raced in my chest, and i could feel the weight of your gaze on me.
i could’ve said no.
i could’ve come up with some excuse.
but i didn’t.
"that would be nice," i managed to say, the words barely above a whisper, but enough for you to hear.
you smiled again, and for a brief moment, it felt like the world was just you and me.
February 12
"you know, i like your quietness, mr. kim."
we were walking together, you had invited me to lunch, and you mentioned you had something you wanted to ask me.
"oh..." was all i could manage to say.
you glanced at me, your eyes catching mine for a moment before you looked away, your smile barely noticeable. i felt a little flushed, a little nervous under your gaze. i quickly looked forward, trying to focus on anything else.
you chuckled softly, your voice breaking the silence. "you remind me a lot of my boyfriend," you said, the words casual, like they didn’t carry the weight they did in my mind.
"oh..." i stammered. so it was your boyfriend.
"do you like him?" i asked without thinking. it was a stupid question.
you laughed, a soft, light sound that seemed to come from somewhere genuine. "i wouldn’t be dating him if i didn’t."
my heart sank just a little.
of course, you liked him. why would i even ask? but i couldn’t take it back.
when we finally reached the restaurant, you led us to a quiet corner, and i sat across from you, feeling a strange mixture of comfort and tension. you looked at me, as if expecting something.
"i thought you’d prefer it like this," you said.
and i did. it was peaceful, calm. just like you.
"so!! the thing i wanted to ask you about," you started, leaning in slightly, your voice lowering in a way that made me pay attention to every word. "it’s valentine’s day soon, and i really want to get something cute for my boyfriend."
"oh..." i said again, my voice barely above a whisper.
"don’t take me wrong, but like i said, you remind me of him. you’re a lot like him. quiet, calm. so maybe you could help?" you leaned in a little, and i could feel my face getting warmer.
it felt strange. unsettling. like a weight pressing against my chest.
"i don't know, ms. ___—"
"you can call me by my name," you reminded me, your voice soft. it made me feel even more unsure of myself.
"___, i think you’re asking the wrong person... i-i’m not good with stuff like... valentine’s day," i stammered, my gaze shifting away from you. i couldn’t meet your eyes. the words felt wrong, awkward.
you studied me for a moment, then leaned back in your chair. "that’s okay, mr. kim," you said, and there was something in your voice that made me feel even worse.
what if you were just trying to make small talk? what if i had ruined it? what if you were just being kind, as always, and i made it so... uncomfortable?
"b-but you like to bake, right?" i suddenly said, not really thinking. "so... that’s a good present, i guess. i mean, i would love it. i mean, they were delicious! so.." i quickly added, flushing slightly at how ridiculous it sounded.
your smile returned, this time wider. "that sounds nice!! and i am glad you liked them" you chuckled, and for some reason, the sound of it made me smile too.
just then, your phone rang. you excused yourself, your voice light as you answered the call.
"oh, excuse me," you said, and i nodded in response, trying not to listen too closely.
"hey, honey... oh, i’m just with a colleague right now.” you chuckled. “i miss you too, joon"
it must’ve been him.
i didn’t mind.
i couldn’t. i just sat there, watching you, wishing this moment could last a little longer, even if it meant nothing more than a colleague relationship. even if it was just fleeting moments like these.
and as you spoke softly to him, my smile faded slightly, but the warmth remained.
February 14
valentine's day.
i hated this day.
but that morning, i couldn’t help but notice you. smiling to your coworkers, your friends, as you handed them small boxes of what i guessed were chocolates, all tied with a bright yellow bow.
even though you weren’t smiling at me, just watching you made me feel warm. it softened the bitterness of the day, just a little.
by afternoon, i was at my desk, buried in work as usual. i didn't see you approach, but i felt the air shift when you stood infront me.
“mr. kim?” yourvoice was gentle, like you always were.
i looked up, startled, and you placed a small box with a purple bow on it in front of me.
“happy valentine’s day,” you said, your smile soft but genuine. and just like that, my heart skipped a beat.
you turned as if to leave, but i couldn’t let it end like that.
“___,” i called out, my voice catching in my throat. you stopped and looked back at me, waiting.
“you can call me taehyung,” i said, the words coming out almost too quietly.
you smiled again, that same warm, reassuring smile. "taehyung," you nodded, as if it were something important.
it was.
to me, it was.
June 13
it was the day you were transferring to a different city.
it was the last time i saw you.
you were a little emotional. there were tears in your eyes as you bid goodbye to your coworkers.
i didn’t expect you to talk to me. i stayed at my desk, silent, watching everythin
it was sad.
hell, it was heartbreaking.
then i saw you walking towardsme, and for a moment, i froze.
“taehyung, i—” you started, your voice soft, hesitant. you looked down, a little sad. “i wish i got to spend more time with you.”
that’s when everything around me shattered. again.
“i regret not becoming a good friend of yours,” you said, your voice wavering, “i… i tried.”
you looked up, your eyes glistening.
“you’ve always been so quiet, so reserved,” you said, letting out a nervous laugh. “i guess i never knew how to reach you. but i wish i had.”
i wanted to say something, anything. but the words got stuck in my throat, just like they always did.
“i hope… you’ll let someone in someday,” you continued, your voice growing softer. “you’re a good person, taehyung. i hope you know that.”
i felt my chest tighten, my heart aching with every word you spoke.
you turned around to leave, taking a few steps, and something inside me broke.
i love you.
you froze for a moment, then turned back to face me, confusion etched across your features. “did you say something?” you asked, your voice tentative, uncertain.
i said it. but it was all in my head.
i hesitated, my chest tightening. “you are a good friend, ___.”
your eyes widened slightly, and for a moment, we both just stared at each other. your gaze held something i couldn’t quite place.
was it surprise? sadness? relief?
“thank you, ___,” i added, trying to steady my voice.
your lips curved into a soft smile, one that reaches your eyes. the smile i love.
“thank you, taehyung,” you said softly.
you gave me a small nod, and then, with one last lingering glance, you turned to leave again.
i stood there, rooted in place, watching as you walked away, your figure growing smaller with every step you took.
i wanted to chase after you. to call out to you.
but i didn’t.
instead, i stayed silent, clutching the words i couldn’t say louder in my chest, where they would remain forever.
you disappeared around the corner, and with that, the last piece of you i had left slipped away.
and all i could do was whisper, too late for you to hear.
“i will miss you.”
November 21
today.
the day that started everything.
it’s strange how vividly i remember it, even after all this time. it feels like it was just yesterday when you walked into the office for the first time, bright eyed and full of energy, ready to take on the world.
i miss you.
a lot.
i don’t know where you are now. i don’t know what your days look like, or how you’re living your life. i don’t know if you’re happy, if you’re struggling, or if you ever think back to those days.
but i know one thing for sure. you’re strong.
no matter how tough things get, you always find a way to smile and keep moving forward, like nothing can hold you back. you don’t dwell on the past, don’t let it weigh you down. you just... keep going.
maybe that’s what i admired about you the most.
maybe that’s why it hurts so much now.
because you were always moving forward, and i was always staying behind.
i think about you every day. the way you smiled, the way your laugh lit up even the dullest corners of the office. i think about how you never seemed to falter, even when things were tough.
but i also remember the small things. the moments when you were quiet, staring out the window like your mind was somewhere else. the way your hands trembled slightly when you were overwhelmed but still tried to keep it together.
i wish i could’ve told you then how much you mattered. how much your presence alone changed everything for me.
but i never did.
and now it’s been so long, and i don’t even know if you remember me. if i was just another face in your story.
maybe i was.
but you were everything in mine.
“hey, taehyung, can you get these copies for me?” jimin’s voice broke through the quiet hum of the office.
“yeah, sure,” i said as he placed the stack on my desk.
he lingered for a moment, his teasing smile creeping onto his face. “you look happy today,” he said, raising a brow. “thinking about someone?”
i looked down, avoiding his gaze. “someone…”
he doesn’t miss a beat, his eyes catching something around my neck. “nice necklace you got there. what is it?”
i held the pendant gently, a faint smile tugging at my lips as i showed it to him.
“uh... a red piece?” he guessed, leaning in to get a better look.
“it’s a flower,” i muttered, my fingers brushing over the broken piece of petal.
he squinted, then tilted his head. “that looks like a piece of broken glass.”
“it is,” i whispered, my voice soft as i stared at it. “beautiful, isn’t it?”
jimin gave me a look, clearly confused, but he didn’t press further. “right, okay.. uh i’ll see you later,” he said, walking away with a shrug.
i closed my eyes, clutching the small, shattered piece in my hand.
even now, i couldn’t forget you.
your eyes.
your laugh.
your cookies.
your smile.
how could i ever forget you?
i would keep you in my heart, even if it hurt. forever.
i hope you’re happy.
i hope you’re smiling the way you always did, bright, warm, as if the world didn’t weigh on your shoulders the way it did on mine.
i hope whoever stands beside you now knows just how lucky they are. i hope they see you for everything you are. your kindness, your strength, the little quirks that make you... you.
and i’m glad
truly glad that..
that day...
i didn't go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like..
i love you.
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