#Yes It Runs Doom (Dash Games)

[topperscumslut]

Kiss Me With Your Eyes Closed (Sejanus Plinth x Reader)

Summary: (Y/N) is the victor of the 9th Hunger Games and the beloved girlfriend of Coriolanus Snow, though she’s secretly in love with his best friend (in this au the hunger games progressed more quickly, for example mentors were already present before the 10th games etc etc). title inspired by Hot Freaks’ Puppy Princess!

Warnings: not much rlly tbh, a wee bit of angst but mostly FLUFFY FLUFFFFF. might write a smutty sequel if this does well (or just if i feel like it lol) but even then it would be more fluffy smut, like sweet love making rather than getting absolutely railed lmao yk? (i probably will so stay tuned if u like this and lmk if u wanna be tagged!)

spoiler free apart from references to coriolanus x lucy gray!!

ok actually it is a pretty good amount of angst nvm lmao

Word count: 2k

You sigh as you run your fingers over the tattered poster, so shiny and new only a year before, reading the now barely legible words. (Y/N) (L/N) Victory Tour, In Honor of the 9th Hunger Games, Arriving Soon in Your District. You remember your victory tour all too well. Despite the traumas you had endured as a victor, you’re grateful for how far you’ve come. Sure, you still have nightmares of your games every now and again, yet even still you have the best fate a girl from District 3 could ever hope for - you had fallen in love with a boy from the Capitol.

From an outsider’s perspective, it was the perfect love story. A doomed romance from the beginning; star crossed lovers, one might say, a Capitol boy and a District girl. When you had arrived at the Capitol for the 9th Hunger Games, near certain you had no chance of winning, your dashing mentor Coriolanus Snow had immediately taken a liking to you. He took you under his wing and coached you through your games, and when you had miraculously emerged victorious and returned to the Capitol, he decided that he wanted you for his own, and who were you to say no? Not even a few weeks before, you were just another girl from District 3, completely unknown, barely scraping by. Now you had been thrust suddenly into a lavish lifestyle with a handsome suitor to boot, adored by all of Panem; the nation’s sweetheart. After your games, you could have left it all behind. Sure, you would never be granted total anonymity being a victor, but you could have gone back to your beaten down home in District 3 and lived a relatively quiet life. After all, it’s not like the Snows had the finances to buy your freedom from your district and turn you into a full fledged Capitol citizen.

But the Plinths did.

You never particularly enjoyed Strabo Plinth as a person, but you couldn’t help but be grateful to him for what he had done for you. You had, however, immediately taken a liking to his caring wife, as well as his juxtaposition of a son, Sejanus, who clearly took more after his mother. In contrast to your rugged, analytical lover, Sejanus was gentle, complex. The two of you had become fast friends while Coriolanus had helped you prepare for the games.

And so before you knew it, this was your new life. At first you were anxious, concerned that your becoming a Capitol citizen and Coriolanus associating so intimately with a girl from the Districts would be seen as an act of rebellion and put you both in danger. However Coriolanus assured you that the nation loved you, both as an individual and as a couple. Sure, it was unexpected, yeah, it broke the (admittedly unwritten) rules, but that’s what made it oh-so fun to watch. Because at the end of the day, the games weren’t a competition - they were a show, and everyone loved an underdog.

There was only one minor flaw. You had fallen in love with a boy from the Capitol, yes, but it wasn’t the one you had so publicly given your heart to.

Your relationship with Coriolanus was practical, and that was about the only positive thing you could truthfully say about it. Neither of you were particularly wealthy or powerful individually, but together, you had potential. If you could keep all of Panem tuned in to your epic love story, you could almost certainly ensure mutual survival. You offered Coriolanus the opportunity to be known as not only a mentor to a victor, but a lover as well. And though nearly a year later his eyes had started to wander, the dapper blond had been quite infatuated with you when the courtship had begun, and Coriolanus was notoriously possessive. While his family was in the midst of financial hardship at the current moment, becoming a Capitol resident gave you the opportunity to get by still much more comfortably than you had in your impoverished home district. And who knew what volatility Coriolanus was capable of if you had rejected his advances? You had been coaxed into this very moment and had no other option but to grin and bear it. After all, all the girls you knew back home would kill to be in your position. A handsome sweetheart, financial stability courtesy of the Plinths, and the whole country all but worshiping you. Coriolanus Snow had offered you not only fame and fortune, but more importantly, security. Safety, in return for your undying affection.

Coriolanus was sweet at first. Charming, for sure. He was certainly attractive, yet he had never really had much of an effect on you. Maybe it was simply intuition. Or maybe it was the fact that he could never compare to his best friend, Sejanus Plinth.

Kind, pure Sejanus. The type of boy that, unlike Coriolanus Snow, truly made your head spin. The chemistry between you and Sejanus was unspoken, yet undeniable. However, you had already reluctantly sworn yourself to Coriolanus, and knew running off with his best friend would certainly put both you and your not so secret admirer in a treacherous situation. Sejanus Plinth was a risk you simply couldn’t afford to take.

What stung the most was that in any other situation, it could have worked. Sejanus was certainly more wealthy and influential than Coriolanus, not that that was what truly mattered to you. If you had been just a bit more fortunate, you could have had the boy you truly loved as your mentor and still have the same security and more that you were now so gracefully granted, if you had simply found your way to Sejanus before Coriolanus had set his sights on you and claimed you as his own. But unfortunately for you, your current romantic relationship was one built upon the grounds of survival rather than love.

If you were fully honest with yourself, you never truly loved Coriolanus - well, not romantically, at least. There was once a time where you had loved him as a dear friend, but in the time you had known him, he had become cruel and vitriolic. You knew from the start that he had always had it in him to become this way, though you had always naively hoped that he wouldn’t, that he would control himself, but the poison within his soul had soon taken over his cold, uncaring heart. He had become hardened by the misfortune of his family and gradually more complaisant in the ways of the Capitol, as well as secretly resentful of the great fortune of his supposed best friend and honorary brother Sejanus.

Now just over a year since you had met, the 10th Hunger Games were nearing to start. You had heard the whispers of Coriolanus sneaking around with his newest mentee, your replacement in more ways than one, Lucy Gray Baird; however it never bothered you. Lucy Gray knew that your relationship with Coriolanus was nothing more than a facade, and the two of you had become unlikely friends. You weren’t sure just how much of his affections for Lucy Gray were genuine, or how much was motivated by a desire to flatter her in an attempt to gain another victor to further his own career. Though Coriolanus’s mood was recently heightened by his new lover, he was still resentful of being assigned such an impoverished district for two years in a row and was prone to fits of rage over this perceived insult. While your home of District 3 was never much of a spectacle, Lucy Gray’s District 12 was miraculously even more down trodden, the poorest district of them all. You couldn’t help but wonder if this assignment was actually made to compliment Coriolanus, to show that if he could made a diamond in the rough out of you, that perhaps he could do the same for Lucy Gray.

As you sit alone in Coriolanus’s bed, still running your fingers gingerly along the photograph, you hear a knock at the door.

“Sejanus?”

“Oh, hey. Is Coryo around?”

You shake your head. “He’s out right now.”

Sejanus’s jaw tightens at your response. “With her?”

You nod unenthusiastically and can see the disgust and anger wash over his face as he makes his way over to you.

“It’s not her fault, Sejanus. She’s actually really sweet.”

He sits down on the bed next to you, careful to leave enough space between the two of you as to not make you uncomfortable. “I know it’s not. It’s his. Does it really not bother you at all?”

“Not particularly.”

He chuckles to himself. “You’re better than me, (Y/N). I don’t know how you put up with it. If I truly loved someone, it would kill me to see them with someone else.” He’s subtle, but you can tell exactly what he’s implying.

“Well good thing I don’t have to see it.”

“Fair enough.”

Sejanus looks sympathetically at you for a second, blissfully unaware that his kind, beautiful brown eyes are making you melt, before noticing the poster in your hand.

“Is that-”

“Yep.” You shiver, remembering your games, the things you saw… “I don’t think it ever occurred to him, the things I had to do in there.”

“It occurred to me.” He gently places his shaky hand on your knee, carefully surveying your expression to make sure you’re okay with the contact, to which you nod slightly, nearly involuntarily. “Look, I’ll say it since no one else in this screwed up place will, I’m sorry you had to go through that.”

You bite your lip, feeling butterflies in your stomach once again as he gives you that look and it takes everything in you not to lean in and kiss him right then and there. Your boyfriend could come home any moment, after all, and you quickly compose yourself, breaking Sejanus’s gaze. “It’s okay. I won. It’s the Hunger Games. It’s an honor.”

He inches carefully closer to you before speaking up again, his deep voice barely above a whisper. “(Y/N), you don’t have to pretend around me.”

You shake your head in denial. “I’m not pretending.”

“Then why haven’t I seen that light in your eyes that I love so much since you’ve left the arena? Why don’t you care that he’s always off with Lucy Gray? Why are the rules different for you than they are for him?”

And suddenly it hits you all at once. Sejanus is right. If Coriolanus is sneaking around with your friend everyday, even when they aren’t training, then what’s to stop you from doing the same to him? What do you owe him when all he’s ever done is keep you like a bird in a cage?

You don’t stop yourself, you don’t even think as you lean in and kiss Sejanus. He gets over the initial shock quickly and melts into it, cradling your body in his arms and pulling you in by the small of your back. You both pull away at the same time, not quite sure what’s gotten into you, but whatever it is, you like it.

“Coriolanus has never kissed me like that.”

“Go figure.”

His nerves kick in once again as he starts to stutter an apology before you shut him up by kissing him softly again.

“Since I first got to the Capitol… Sejanus, nothing here has felt right, except for you.”

“I could say the same about you,” he muses as he leans in once again, kissing you slow, both of you pretending the moment could last forever. If only…

[rando-d]

Ultrakill Review: Turn Back Now

"Better late than never ammiright chat"

Ultrakill is one of the best shooter games I've ever played. I'm am no expert on shooters, I've played a good amount. I hate "tatical" shooters, which is why shooters like Valorant have repulsed me, whereas games like Fortnite and Team Fortress 2 have been my addiction. Heck, even in 2016, I liked Overwatch (obviously not anymore), but there was a time. Because "tactical" shooters just equate to camping around in one place waiting for someone to fight you, and doing anything energetic or running around the place is severely discouraged and games like those actively avoid rewarding players for risky play.

Tactical Shooters Suck, Ultrakill isn't one

Games like Team Fortress 2 and Fortnite are so insanely fun to me because those are shooters that ENCOURAGE you to fight people and have a risky playstyle, while giving players the option to camp, it moreso discourages it and grinding through entire lobbies feels just so satisfying. That being said, you can probably guess that Ultrakill would easily be something I would fall in love with, and you'd be perfectly correct on that. Ultrakill is everything I love about shooters, with 0 of the problems. Heck, this may be even my favorite shooter. While I'm not particularly good at the game, it is so insanely fun, and dying in the game always feels like my fun and not some sort of unbalanced enemy or really weird game design choice.

Combat

Of course, the game isn't finished and has 2 more chapters out of its 9 chapters, but those last 2 chapters could be awful, and I still would love the game. I have most of the game here. I could just ignore those last 2 chapters (again, assuming it's bad, which is highly unlikely). One of the reasons that it's unlikely is due to the games great combat system, I criticize games for cheap combat a lot, if you're making an action game, you need some good combat, and it takes a lot to impress me on that department. Ultrakill did just that. Impress me. It has a wide variety of weapons to choose from, and every level of the game's somehow feels designed around those weapons. There are so many different enemies, each with their own unique weaknesses, good play and risky movement where you utilize all the tools at your desposal is rewarded with style points, just seeing that "ULTRAKILL" combo sign hits different.

Movement

Ultrakill, while simple in terms of how you can move around the map, is really fun and gets the job well. In the beauty of its simplicity, you can perform lots of cool tricks that made me feel like an edgy teen all over again. Again, the style point system works well and constantly dashing to the goal in a short period of time while making sure to kill all the enemies and doing it all in a style is a pretty daunting and time consuming yet fun goal to achieve for all levels. Not a single level in Ultrakill kept me bored aside from the secret missions. And yes, the movement is somewhat simple in Ultrakill, and while I have seen that there is cool stuff you can do, I can't help but feel that I wish there's a bit more that could be done to improve the game's movement and add more to it while not taking away from its simplicity.

Presentation

We're in an era where people yield nostolgia to things like the N64, and PS1, but honestly, I'd compare this games graphics to Doom, that's despite the fact that the game goes out of its way to tell you that it's inspired by PS1 graphics. The game also goes out of its way to make its creatures disgusting and egregious to look it, really conveying hell's warfare to you well. The game does a great job at conveying some of the story through its environment. enviormental storytelling is always a great way of helping to tell a game story. The music is also great, the chaotic nature of the game just blended perfectly with the music style of Breakcore, I would not pick any other genre of music for a game of the kind, especially the boss themes, that's when the game really locks in. But, I will say, while all the enviorments do a great job of distinguishing each other while keeping the games disturbing feel, that can't be said for gluttony. It honestly was a bit too gross to look at, but apparently, the games developer stated that won't be of concern since he's planning on redesigning it, which I'm looking forward to.

Verdict

Ultrakill is one of, if not the best, shooter video games that I have ever played and pushes the genre of indie shooters to major new heights. I'm excited to see the game's story end, and I'll continue to replay the hell out of it for the future, it's one of the most addicting experiences I've ever had the pleasure of, you should turn back now because this game will throw you into a loop which you won't be able to escape, trying to break through that mess is crazy.

[tragicallycrispygirl]

After having a few days to play around with Slayer, I want to share my opinion on him and his strength as a character.

In short, while I think he's absolutely a premium character near the top of the roster, I don't think I would really call him an all-around strongest due to how matchup dependent he feels.

In long: his damage is fucking ridiculous. Genuinely fucking ridiculous. You can get 300+ damage meterlessly at ROUND START with a Pilebunker loop. It does require a bit of luck (you need a counterhit H normal) but the fact that he can even do that AND ALSO GET POSITIVE BONUS is insane. His absolute biggest problem though is his movement, to an annoying degree, and it's where a lot of the matchup stuff comes in. I played against an Axl who beat the absolute shit out of me, and the whole time he seemed to have a very easy time just moving backwards and poking me out. Axl is definitely very good at that, but JESUS.

Slayer's movement is just so, so fucking bad. All of his options to get in are incredibly committal, and are all flawed in some way:

-Mashing Dash: Slow. You can't block during the dash. You can't special cancel the dash (as far as I know).

-Walking: go make a coffee while you wander over to your enemy lmao

-IAD/Jumping and Airdashing: Prepare to taste a delicious 6P

-Mappa Hunch: Pretty long startup and whiff recovery, and if your opponent blocks it you're probably giving up your turn. Vulnerable to being stuffed by disjoints, or even just trading disadvantageously.

-Dandy Step: Same problems as Mappa but with the added bonus of not going as far!

-RC Super Mappa Hunch: Costs 100 tension.

-RC 6K > j.s: Might actually be pretty useful? I haven't tried it before but you go flying full screen so...

These movement issues are the crux of what I feel makes him not an overall strong character, just because he gets zoned so so hard. Don't get me wrong, he is very good, but he has a lot of glaring weaknesses that are very prevalent in certain matchups. Hand of Doom is also garbaaaaage even just backdashing on wakeup in this game feels bad but the followup is iekrnfkdowbekfnf.

All of this, though, means they did a pretty excellent job of translating him from XRD, where I'd say a lot of the same things about him! His strengths are very matchup dependent! I also want to be clear that him having these weaknesses is important. If he could just run you down and melt 3/4 of your healthbar away, he would absolutely be the most overtuned character in the game. Insert Sol Badguy joke here.

There are some things I'd nerf, though:

-Lower the height of It's Late. Fucking look at this shit man his fist isn't even ever up there

-Make the Dandy follow-ups and Mappas an extra frame minus. (Dandies -3, Mappas -2 and -3 respectively.) They're supposed to make Slayer give up his turn on block, but often you can sneak in a 2K or 2P to keep the pressure going. I don't think that should be gone, but I think it should be higher risk. This might be very harsh but idfk man

-Master's Hammer not +26 on block. That's fucking ridiculous for a point blank move come on

-Make his damage modifier x1. This is probably too harsh, but I don't really feel that he should take less damage as a brawler type character. Yes I get he has poor defensive options but still

All of these might be nerfing him too hard, but at the very least I want It's Late shortened pls it's fucking dumb.

As for buffs, I don't think he needs very many, but:

-Increase the distance of his normal dash, or make it faster. This might make him too fast but fuck me his dash feels awful at longer than roundstart ranges.

-Keep the opponent closer on a K Mappa knockdown. This would have the added benefit of making the 5K link not feel so weird and strange.

As for SILLY FUN STUPID buffs I think he should have:

-Super Mappa Hunch is now 15+0 instead of 14+1, so at close range you can't block after the super freeze. I don't know if it hits full screen in 1 frame, but I want my XRD Dead On Time shenanigans back dammit.

-Last horizon now deals 300 damage. This is a cleaner number than 290.

-Last Horizon will now go full screen. It doesn't go any faster he just goes all the way full screen.

-Hand of Doom is actually invincible and gives you c.s links on counter-hit (make it like -8 instead of -7 to compensate)

-Pilebunker disregards the normal chip damage rules and can kill at any amount of health

-Counterhit Pilebunker gives the silly tumble for a full combo that it used to

All in all, I think Slayer is comfortably lower/middle-top tier. Am I downplaying because I love him and also am not good? Maybe. I've always hung out around floor 10 pretty comfortably before he came out, but I reached the Celestial Challenge for the first time EVER using him, so make of that what you will. I'd be interested to hear how you all feel about him.

The most important thing, though? He's really fun. I do just really like Strive and how it feels, but I find him very fun to play and play against. (The play against might change, I wanna learn Testament so we'll see how I feel later lmao)

Edit: After trying to learn Testament and going to open park and playing about 25 matches against a Slayer, some of my opinions have shifted:

-Obliterate Master's Hammer. Destroy it. Explode. +26 is stupid. At the VERY LEAST make it lower to the ground to you can actually c.s it or something

-Mappa is a ridiculously good way to get in lmaoooooooooo im just fucking dumbbbbbbb make that shit -2 and -3 NOW

-He doesn't need any buffs

I need someone better than me to weigh in on the matchup thing, cause it felt kinda even? I just don't know how to play Testament.

[blue-corvid]

Tumblr Live Hot(?) Takes

The thing that really kills me about Tumblr Live is honestly that it could have been fine -- useful even!

I already follow streamers on Tumblr! I follow artists, comedians, video game let's-players, tabletop gaming nerds, all of whom stream somewhere that isn't Tumblr! If I could watch them stream on Tumblr, I would absolutely do that!

But Tumblr. My beloved. You fucked it up so bad. You immediately made it as sketchy and annoying as possible, and now... by the point that “everybody hates it” is the thing most people know about it, i can’t imagine it would be easy to save.

So this is my open letter to Tumblr (I don't know who to direct it at -- @staff? I hope that's okay) -- here’s where I think you went wrong, and how you could fix it (if it is, in fact, fixable.)

Tumblr Live appeared silently with no warning.

When it first showed up, the only thing I heard about it was ���what the fuck is this?” I Googled it and found basically nothing, and then when I looked it up in Tumblr’s support pages, it wasn’t super clear what Tumblr Live was or what it was for. Streaming platform was only my best guess.

Most of the article was about how you could make money off it. Tumblr, I can’t make money off of it if I don’t know what it is, how to use it, or how to explain it to anyone.

This isn't the case anymore, but it was a serious problem early on.

(Seemingly) no effort to make it look appealing or useful.

It looks and acts like an ad. It’s positioned like an ad at the top of the dashboard. Like an ad, it doesn’t have any connection to what I do or care about on Tumblr.

It looks to be a bunch of still shots from the live chats that it’s promoting and this is just such an unbelievably bad idea.

See, here's the thing: Tumblr has a running problem with porn bots, most of which can be quickly identified by their avatars, which are almost always (stolen) pictures of attractive women, often in revealing clothing.

Guess what every single image I can see on the Tumblr Live ad banner is? Did you guess pictures of attractive women, often in revealing clothing? See the problem? Regardless of my feelings on or desire to interact with cam girls (which are, for the record: I’m not interested personally but I wish you good vibes and good luck and respectful clients), my gut reaction upon seeing the Tumblr Live banner is, “That looks like a bunch of porn bots.”

When you add this to how hard it was to find information about Tumblr Live, how poorly its terms of service were explained, and the state of the internet right now (with every social media site gunning to get its teeth into its uses' throats to vampire as much sensitive personal data from them as possible), Tumblr Live looks dangerous.

When Tumblr users got annoyed with it, there was (seemingly) no effort to fix any of the problems.

Instead of explaining clearly what Live is and how it works and making it inherently less intrusive, Tumblr made excuses about how they had to try to make it profitable and doubled down on making it as annoying as possible with its stupid “snooze” feature.

Every time this stupid porn-bot-looking ad banner popped up on someone’s dash after a week of being lulled into a false sense of security, they hated it a little more.

Tumblr basically hand-crafted a sitewide campaign to yell about how bad this feature is once a week.

How could it have been better?

It’s all well and good to sit here and pass judgement, but was it not just doomed from the start? Could Tumblr really have done any better?

Yes. Absolutely yes.

Here’s how you fix Tumblr Live:

Get rid of the ad-banner-style preview placement.

Instead, mimic what people are doing for their Twitch streams already. Send out a notification on my dashboard when a blog I follow goes live. Respect the rules for normal Tumblr posts when it comes to visibility: let people blaze and reblog them and don’t push them out to people who wouldn’t normally see posts from that blog except according to users’ dashboard preferences.

For persistent notifications (since streams aren’t one-and-done like posts), put a list of blogs I follow that are currently live in the sidebar.

Because these features are no longer intrusive, you no longer need an option in the settings to toggle them off, and people who initially wrote off Live can explore it if it ever becomes valuable to them instead of making it disappear forever.

Get the stream previews off users' screens as soon as humanly possible.

Tumblr has a porn bot problem. Because people's (especially women's and especially cam girls') pictures get scraped for porn bot avatars, Tumblr users are gonna associate pictures of real live non-celebrity people (especially women) with internet scams. Forget this "keep it clean" shit -- whether it looks "clean" matters less than whether it looks like someone wants to steal my credit card information. (And on the other side of that, please understand that sex worker positivity doesn't help sex workers if a feature they use gets shut down because your average Tumblr user thinks it looks so sketchy that they won't touch it with a ten-foot pole.)

Replace the stream preview with the streamer's avatar and the stream title and/or a streamer-selected cover image.

Get help from actual streamers.

Go find Tumblr users who regularly make posts announcing Twitch streams and introduce them to Tumblr Live. For people who already use Tumblr, already stream stuff, and already use Tumblr to tell their audience that they're streaming, having a streaming platform attached to Tumblr could be a real convenience. If you have premium streaming features, find some popular streamers who use Tumblr and give them free access to those features for a while. Even better, maybe ask them for feedback on those features.

Most importantly, get people who stream a variety of different things. Even if Tumblr users don't hate Tumblr Live, if they're under the impression that it's only for one thing and that one thing is something they're not into, they're never gonna use it.

...That's it, that's all I've got. I know this post is a monster, but if anyone reads it: thanks. Good luck in to all in this new era of Tumblr.

[sciencestyled]

The Wisest of Kings Spills the Beans: How Your Phone Might be Messing with Your Mini-Mes

Hey there, you scrolling saints and tech-savvy sinners! We've got something juicy for you today. Picture this: King Solomon, yes, THE King Solomon – that ancient dude with the bling and wisdom who could give Gandalf a run for his money – is back from the past. And guess what? He’s swapping his chariots and chalices to chat about... wait for it... cell phones and your swimmers. Yup, you heard us right.

So, here's the tea. Our main man Solomon, in all his kingly glory, is not talking about battles, beasts, or beauties. Nope. He’s getting down and dirty with science, spinning yarns about those little gadgets we can’t live without – our mobile phones. But, plot twist: it's not about the latest app or selfie game; it's about how these pocket-sized wizards might be zapping the mojo right out of your baby-making batter.

Let's break it down. We all know that back in Solomon’s day, being a stud was all about how many little Solomons you could pop out. Fast forward to now, and our wise king is scratching his beard, pondering if our beloved cell phones are throwing shade on our future mini-mes. It's like a modern-day soap opera with a royal twist!

Solomon’s got this funky tale, something about electromagnetic fields (EMFs) – those invisible waves our phones are always blabbing out. Think of it like your phone’s secret language, whispering sweet nothings to your nether regions. And here's the kicker: these chats might just be putting a damper on the little soldiers swimming in your baby batter. We're talking about your swimmers, your sperm, getting all lazy and wonky because they’re too cozy with your phone.

But hold your horses! It's not all doom and gloom. King Solomon, in his infinite wisdom, reminds us to take this with a grain of salt. Science, like a good court jester, has a way of being both enlightening and a bit playful. So, before you start freaking out and tossing your phone like it's hot (literally), remember: it's all about balance, moderation, and not getting too cozy with your electronic BFF.

In true Solomon style, he’s not just wagging his finger; he's inviting us to a royal rumble of thoughts. It's a call to action, folks! Let’s not just swipe right on life. Instead, let’s swipe wisely. Think of your future royal lineage, your legacy, and maybe, just maybe, give your little guys down there some breathing room.

So, there you have it – wisdom from the ages, served with a side of science and a dash of royal charisma. King Solomon’s deep dive into our digital dilemmas is more than just a cautionary tale; it's a wake-up call wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma, garnished with a beard. Stay smart, stay savvy, and maybe keep that phone out of your pocket for a bit. Who knows, your future heirs might just thank you!

[fakeshibe]

Merry Christmas and happy holidays!!! giving some recommendations back!! everything is like, online or computer based because i can't think of anything irl! Also! i tried to find things that are free, because everything costs money now and it sucks so free resources are always good :)

Does The Dog Die? (Totally free, donation optional) A crowdsourced database of content/trigger warnings for film, tv, books, comic and just general media and entertainment. It gives a yes/no for triggers as rated by users, and lets users add comments describing what exactly happens so that you can fully understand why it might be triggering. It covers a lot of stuff, from really common triggers like abuse, to more specific triggers like misrepresentation of autism or specific injuries (like i really hate teeth stuff, and this site gives me a heads-up of if anything happens, and how I'll know it's coming up). Everybody deserves to enjoy films, triggers and sensitivities shouldn't get in the way of that. https://www.doesthedogdie.com/

JustWatch (Totally free, Ad supported) A database of where films and television shows are available to stream/purchase online. It's also built into letterboxd, which i'm not gonna put on the list cause it's already fairly well known, but letterboxd is super useful for building watchlists and keeping track of what films you've seen!! Anyway, JustWatch will show you every location a film is streaming, if it's free, and you can change location to see if you can get it anywhere when you are definetly on holiday and not changing your location any other way :)

SIGNALIS (Normally £16, £11 in steam winter sale) Play signalist please oh my god. An incredible survival horror with PSX visuals and gameplay inspired by Silent Hill and Resident Evil. It has a genuinely touching and devestating story about love and loss, and visuals inspired by Neon Genesis Evangelion (Especially the last 2 episodes), Ghost in the Shell and every other good sci-fi anime to exist. It's got the depressing hopelessness of Evangelion plus the Exestential horror of lovecraft and a dash of doomed lesbian robot angst to top it all off. (And just a tip, the end is not always the end. Even when it really, really feels like it is)

This specific SilvaGunner rip (Totally free)It's a mash-up of Everything is Going to be Okay from Prey (2017) and Fresh Static Snow by Porter Robinson and when you listen to it it really does feel like everything is going to be okay.

Prey (2017) (Normally £25, currently £2.50) I talk about Dishonored a lot but I'm just as obsessed with Prey. It's just that posting almost anything about Prey is spoiling Prey, and I think it's better to go in blind. I love that game with my whole heart. I could say so much about this game but I don't wanna spoil it so I'll leave it at that.

In fact fuck it, every Arkane game (Normally £200+, currently £33) they're all on sale on steam till Jan 4th. You can buy almost every arkane game ever made in a bundle for less than £10 atm. Dishonored and all it's DLC, Dishonored 2, Prey, Dishonored: Death of the outsider, Arx Fatalis and Dark Messiah are in the Arkane 20th Anniversary collection which is currently £8.26. Deathloop is £10 and Redfall is £15. You can buy every Arkane game for £33 at the moment which is genuinely ridiculous. It'd normally be like £200!!! if you've been thinking about trying any of them, now is the time!! :)

Dither Me This (Totally free, donation optional) This website just dithers images for you, which makes them look really cool and also means they take up far less space. So if you wanna run an old tech style blog, you can make all your images look the same way they'd be displayed on an Apple II computer or a commodore 64. v cool little site! https://doodad.dev/dither-me-this/

MyNoise (Totally free, donation optional) You wanna generate noise? this website is for you! what type of noise? well there's the usual rain, white noise, oceans, brown noise, distant thunder stuff. But also! Cafe noise, forest noise, dungeon noise, tavern noise, oblivion?, spooky ghost singing??, exam hall noises??? literally any soundscape you can think of, bam there's something for it on there. And best of all? it's customisable! here are sliders to change the elements each soundscape is made of. So if your dungeon is a little too much water dripping and not enough clanking chains, well you can just move those sliders till you're happy with it, for literally every pre-set soundscape on the site. None of the pre-sets match what you're looking for? well, make your own! you can copy the sliders from other soundscapes and add them to your own composite soundscape to create a new soundscape. It's a little complicated and can only be done on desktop, not their app, but it's great!! Does your medieval tavern need more whimsical siren song, sorted. Your peaceful beach needs some bird song? easy. It's really great. Some stuff is paywalled, but honestly in my entire time using the site I've never been blocked from anything, it's only things like guided meditation and downloads that are blocked. If I used it more often I'd absolutely donate to their Patreon tbh. You can't use these soundscapes in creative stuff without permission because copyright and human decency obv, but they're excellent for writing/reading atmosphere or for ttrpg stuff!! and if you're a patron you can get them to send you an mp3 version of any soundscape, including your custom ones :)

merry christmas and happy holidays again!! I hope some of this is useful or interesting :) honoured to be part of your tradition this year!! I said in the comments already but there's definitely stuff in there that I'm gonna find super interesting!! especially the doc and the comic, they definitely seem like my thing :D

No obligation to also add things, but there's a couple things I think you guys would find useful/interesting in both posts so I'm tagging you!! @adammonoscore the sound generator especially might be useful for ttrpg stuff, @brittleboneless and @sevententv the £200 of games for £30 might be of interest to you, @exoticotter @hamtv12 and @crunchysaladx the dithering tool and art doc might be of interest to you!! (i haven't watched it yet though so i can't say exactly why other than it's art) also!! @idkhbutillendupranting i’m tagging you because i think you’d find a couple of things interesting, the yo ho ho suggestions, gaming and just general holiday vibes i wanted to tag you for

i wanna hear your recommendations!

a list with some stuff i like + a request for you to share yours :)

as a godless queer who spawned on earth randomly one time, my only holiday-season tradition is charity + passionately enjoying things. in lieu of passing my followers & mutuals $100 cash, have a random variety of things you might like to try - i know we're an international bunch so your mileage may vary on what you can access. in the spirit of giving i am hoping for some recs 🎁♥

disclaimer these are just things i like i am not paid. would be great. but.

yo ho ho if you read comics & manga but always found it to be a pain in the ass to source online, here's the aggregator app of your dreams: tachiyomiJ2K. real. not clickbait. android only tho. the extensions mangacute, mangadex, allanime, and mangareader, are good places to start. as a creator, i'm always iffy about recommending this kind of thing because i'd much prefer you went out and brought the things you're reading, however i'm not under any illusions about which era we're in, media-wise and economy-wise

gemma! - webcomic what if corvo was a woman and young emily was a dragon and they went on adventures in a fun fantasy/adventure way that is Extremely Gender. pictured: gender. god i want to be her > is this the greatest webcomic of all time? no. is it that sweet spot between 'mindless fun' and 'good'? yes. you get me

laksa noodles the more intl friends i have the more i realise that laksa isn't common everywhere. don't let that stop you from trying it. ultimate comfort food. hearty noodly soupy goodness. worth seeking out fr

ways of seeing - mini-documentary so profoundly changed the way i think that i had been wanting to revisit it and so was delighted to find its all on youtube. if you're an artist or want to improve your ability to critically think about what you're seeing in media, this is a must-see. link or embedded>

FUCKING GOOD AND CHEAP GREEN TEA price comment won't apply to everyone this site offers great prices for high quality tea direct from the farm. been buying from here for years and its always amazing - i love the houjicha/roast green tea, and if you like green tea but always wish it was stronger without sacrificing taste or becoming bitter, i recommend genmaicha matcha-iri, which uses matcha to intensify the flavour. yum

incense body powder being a perfume nerd who is prone to migraines sucks. if you like spices and good incense - not the $2 kind that you use to hide cigs from your parents but rather the kind that smells like wandering into a forest temple - you'll love incense body powder. it lasts well and i'd most compare it to a softer, more gourmand comme des garçons Incense series 3 kyoto. shoyeido is the easiest to source as far as i can tell, but other brands make it too. USD$11 - cheaper than even cheap perfumes tbh - the bag will last you years. if you try this please tell me i'd love to know what you think!

anyway!! i wanna hear your recs if you have any! can be any type of thing that has recently improved your mood or changed your life or you think someone else might like?

anyone reading can go for it, consider this a carte blanche for recommendations. gonna tag a few people - you don't have to of course thank you love you <;3 @lapinneok @dangerousdan-dan @arosebyothernames @headcrabrave @corvidad @neznoodles @retired-crow @corpseprince @i-really-hate-creating-usernames @geminison @fakeshibe @skemford @loveofdetail + please feel welcome if not tagged! edit OH @nekon-ron i tried to tag your old URL. ha

[butwhatifidothis]

ayo damn how you getting such fast times on hades 👀 been trying to better my own times but i never get it under 20 never mind 15 mins lmfao

In general I just try to go for builds that rack up a lot of damage quickly! They change for which weapon I use, of which I tend to go for either the Hera bow, Zagreus' spear, or Demeter's twin fists, but generally speaking I try to find the combos with the best synergy. And also luck too of course lol.

For that run specifically: I used the Hera bow and started the run with Aphrodite's cast, which erases the cast's downside of having doodoo range by slapping it on the bow's attack instead. Then I got Ares into the run in Asphodel through his keepsake and got his attack that inflicts Doom, which eventually led to me getting his and Aphrodite's duo that continuously inflicts Doom on Weakened enemies (and since both statuses are caused by my attack most of the time that means that happens A Lot). After that is Artemis in Elysium and I get her Call and Exit Wounds, the first cuz that shit can do Big Damage and the second cuz it synergies so well with the Hera bow + Aphrodite cast combo.

All that are what I actively sought to get since I knew from the jump they'd all work well together - I'd beaten the 32 heat challenge with a build similar to that in terms of damage output (of course not exactly lmao but ye). Another factor though for this run specifically is the fact that Demeter and Zeus dropped by and happened to give their Dash (Demeter) and their Reflex (Zeus - that "near miss" thing where he shoots lighting on a well timed dodge) that makes it to where the Jolted effect doesn't wear off if the enemy attacks, which definitely helped some no doubt lol. Another luck factor that I always go for with the bow is the Explosive Shot - the slightly slower attack time is made up for damage and the additional range the explosion gives the attack, that kind of thing.

And also!! Don't be afraid to go to Chaos!! That's how I snagged me an extra cast despite not getting Artemis' legendary, and the boosts they give to other things can be real game-changing if you're willing to take the risk they first impose lol.

(if you wanna see that in real time, here’s a video of the second half of the Hades fight - not the best quality and the audio cuts out near the end but ye)

And that general idea is how I go about trying to go fast! Just look for combos that work well together lol

Here's how my mirror looks too!:

(Fated Persuasion especially helps a looooot with better curating the run to better suit what you're aiming for lol)

Hope that helps any! <3

[snowdice]

Finding the Time to Study Fic 2 [Day 133]

Here is my starting post for today’s study break stories session. I will reblog this post with the story as I write them today. Feel free to send in asks about anything at any point, even if it’s not for the part of the story I’m currently on.

If you aren’t interested and don’t want all of these posts clogging your dash, please feel free to block the tag “study break stories” as all posts and voting about it will go there. You can still see the finished product of the story even if you are blocking that tag as I will not tag the edited chapters with “study break stories” but with the tag “folds in paper.”

See the Folds in Time Universe Master Post for edited chapters. Not yet edited chapters are under the cut. I also have a playlist on youtube for this story.

I am going to get so interrupted. I’m not sure if I should even start this lmao.

Chapter 49 (Dinner and a Movie)

Patton left in the morning and almost immediately sent a confirmation text to Logan saying that he’d made it to the correct time and place with no issue. From there it was just a waiting game for Patton and for those left in the apartment.

That was Virgil’s least favorite type of game.

Even with Patton checking in every so often, Virgil couldn’t help but be nervous. This was why he was a professor and not an employee of the TPI. So many things could go wrong with trips like these!

Virgil did his best to keep his anxiety on the down low. It was, after all, Logan and Roman’s lifelong friend who was running around some other century at the location of a time distortion. They were both obviously nervous since Patton’s last trip had ended in disaster.

…

This trip was going to end in disaster a little bit too, Virgil knew, but for his sanity, he was going to ignore that fact.

The point was, Roman was constantly going to the gym which was reportedly not normal behavior, and Logan spent his days re-checking calculations that were far too late to correct even if Patton hadn’t already confirmed they were perfect by arriving when he should have.

Yet, despite being an anxious wreck, Logan eventually forced himself to put his lined notebook paper away. Roman was out once again when he finally shoved it in a drawer to get it away from himself.

Virgil looked up from doom scrolling on his phone.

“We should go out to dinner,” he suggested suddenly.

Virgil glanced at the pile of take-out containers stacked near the kitchen trashcan. They hadn’t left the apartment in days. “Sure,” he agreed.

They got changed and exited the apartment with no plans in mind. Logan asked him if he wanted anything in particular but Virgil didn’t know many places in this time, so he decided to trust Logan to pick something.

He should not have trusted him.

He glared at Logan from where they stood awkwardly in the middle of a mall. Logan appeared to only be entertained by his ire.

“Really?” Virgil asked.

“I wanted to see for myself if you were really that bad with chopsticks,” he said with a grin.

“I’m not,” Virgil said, crossing his arms. “The anxiety had gotten to me. I resent this experiment.”

Logan just laughed, knowing well enough that Virgil wasn’t actually irritated. In fact, Virgil couldn’t help but feel a fond squeeze in his chest. It was almost an inside joke, just between the two of them.

“It is actually decent sushi,” Logan said.

“Ah yes, 21st century American Midwest sushi,” Virgil drawled. “I’m simply quivering with anticipation for the authenticity we are about to enjoy.”

“It’s unanimously considered the best sushi in town by my friend group,” Logan said as if the fact that Mr. Asiago-Cheese-Bread-For-French-Toast and Mr.-Went-Along-With-Cooking-Asiago-Cheese-Bread-French-Toast’s endorsement would inspire any confidence in Virgil. Patton may have Japanese blood, but he’d grown up in the Appalachians. Don’t even get Virgil started on Roman.

“It’s in. A. Mall.”

“So?” Logan asked.

“It’s a sushi stand in a mall,” Virgil said. “There isn’t even seating.”

“There’s seating,” Logan argued, nodding at the five chairs sitting in front of the counter.

The seating was completely empty, which could be because their eating schedule was off and they were trying to eat dinner at 3pm, but more likely had to do with everyone else having more sense than the man standing in front of Virgil.

“Where’s your sense of adventure?” Logan asked. “Are you not an anthropologist? Do you not wish to experience the culture of the time first-hand.”

Virgil glared at him.

“Please try it,” Logan said, still amused. “It really is good.”

“If I get food poisoning, I’m blaming you,” Virgil warned.

“Noted,” Logan replied with a nod. Then, Virgil reluctantly allowed himself to be led over to the sushi stand.

The man behind the sushi stand greeted them jovially as they approached. He obviously knew Logan and even asked about Patton and Roman as they took a seat.

Virgil did have to admit, despite his instinctual misgivings about mall sushi, what he could glimpse of the man’s set up seemed legit. It looked like a real sushi bar if a bit on the small size.

They’d sat down in front of a glass case filled with chilled fish, and Virgil could see a large rice cooker behind the man and a normal refrigerator for non-fish ingredients.

Laminated menus were handed to them. It was only one page and didn’t even have a back, but honestly that was probably a good thing. If this place served a bunch of complicated or fancy dishes, Virgil would have been worried.

…

Well, he was still worried (it was mall sushi), but he wasn’t running screaming. The place looked like it wouldn’t give him food poisoning at the very least.

Logan suggested they get a “rainbow” and “snake” roll to split as well as a few different types of nigiri and Virgil didn’t argue.

The chef was kind, and he assembled all of the sushi fully in Virgil’s view which made him a lot less leery about the meal. The man seemed to know what he was doing. The fish wouldn’t be as fresh as it would have been in a coastal area, but it was clearly properly handled. When he finished making their order, he handed it to them all on one big plate.

They ate and talked with each other and the chef. Virgil was ribbed gently about his chopstick anxiety and the chef apparently decided to be on Virgil’s side of the conflict because as soon as he heard Logan talking about it, he pipped in with a story about Logan mistaking wasabi for avocado once.

By the end of their dinner, Virgil had to admit, when correcting for ingredient availability, it was pretty good sushi. He would not say it was the best sushi he’d ever had, but it was worlds better than what he’d expected.

Logan could obviously tell what his opinion was as they thanked the chef and paid, because he looked overly smug about it.

“Yeah, yeah,” Virgil said as they left the mall. “You’re good at picking restaurants.”

“I’m sure you are also when you’re in a more familiar location,” Logan said, still smiling smugly.

“I’m not actually,” Virgil said with a laugh. “I consistently panic choose the worst option every time.”

“Well, I’m usually the opposite,” Logan said. “So, I guess we balance each other out in that regard.”

“Yeah,” Virgil said with a grin. He shoved his hands into his hoodie pocket. “Uh, what are we going to do when we get back to the apartment?” he asked. “Because sitting there drowning in anxiety like we’ve been for the last few days isn’t the best for my mental health.”

“I’m not sure,” Logan said. “Did you have anything in mind that you wanted to do?”

“Hmm,” Virgil said. “You guys still have Blockbuster?”

“No,” Logan said, “but we do still have a Family Video store nearby.”

“Is it close enough to walk there?” Virgil asked.

“It is,” Logan said, “though if you wish to watch a movie, we could use a streaming service or my… library of movies.” Virgil doubted the legality of that ‘library’ both with the current authorities and the TPI.

Virgil shrugged. “It’s the charm of it,” he said.

“The charm of going to a business already made obsolete and on the brink of collapse?” Logan asked.

“Exactly,” said Virgil with a smile.

“Very well,” Logan said, turning to head in a slightly different direction. “If that’s what you want, we can go there.”

They were in a building that would look abandoned if there wasn’t a light on inside within 15 minutes.

The video rental store had clearly seen better days. Its carpet pattern was clearly from another decade and had been trampled over so often they might as well be walking on the linoleum underneath. A sign asked patrons to close the door behind them when entering as the spring that was supposed to make it close on its own had long since worn down to nothing. Virgil doubted anyone planned to replace it.

There was only one person working, a guy in his 30s who glanced at them briefly before returning to looking at his phone. Ah yes, Virgil’s favorite type of employee.

“What movie would you like to watch?” Logan asked. He glanced at one small, but still surprisingly present section filled with VHS tapes.

“I don’t know,” Virgil said. “Isn’t that the exciting part? Stop by a movie rental place on a Friday night, grab a more than likely crappy movie and some Milk Duds and proceed to sit and watch the stupid thing anyway because you already paid for it.

“Virgil, I grew up in the 90s. This is nowhere near exciting for me. There is a reason streaming sites have taken over the market,” Logan replied. “Also, it is Tuesday.”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “Just panic choose a movie with me nerd.”

“I don’t ‘panic choose’ anything,” Logan said. “I-”

“You do today,” Virgil interrupted.

“But…”

“Choose a letter, Logan.”

“…S?”

“Great!” Virgil dragged him off in the direction of the movies that started with ‘S.’

~~~

“This is just… gross,” Virgil declared a little under an hour and a half later and about an hour into the film.

“It’s a random romantic comedy from 2002,” Logan responded. “What did you expect?”

“Yeah, but on one hand there’s weird sex jokes and actors that might as well be from mars for all they know about human behavior… then on the other there’s actual on-screen physical abuse between the leads in a romance.

“I will concede that point,” Logan said, “but I will remind you that this could have been avoided if you had allowed me to do proper investigation of the movie choices before renting.”

“Ugh, yeah, yeah,” Virgil replied, leaning back to stare at the ceiling. “Just turn it off.”

Logan complied, reaching over to eject the DVD from his computer. The three roommates didn’t have an actual DVD player connected to their TV, so he and Virgil had chosen to use the desktop computer in the bedroom Virgil had been using during his stay.

Virgil was currently laying on Logan’s bed with Logan sat propped up against the headboard. Logan leaned over to hover over him, interrupting his staring contest with the ceiling.

“Thank you for helping distract me,” he said. “Despite the fact that we now know more about what we’re doing, I still worry about sending Patton through time. His last trip did not improve my confidence. I have been… rather nervous.”

“Well, I’m glad I could help,” Virgil said. “At least a little.”

“You helped a lot,” Logan replied. His hand reached down to pat Virgil’s shoulder, but then lingered there for a moment too long.

Virgil found himself sitting up suddenly. Logan had to jerk back to keep their heads from colliding. “I…” Virgil choked out once he was sitting up. “Um…”

Logan’s mouth curled into a half smile. He offered a hand and Virgil took it.

Virgil glanced at their now entwined hands. “I, uh, I’m an anthropologist.”

“I am aware,” Logan said.

“And, uh, you were born in this time, so technically, I’m studying you…”

“I’m a time traveler, Virgil,” he said, sounding amused. “I doubt I’m a pure specimen for any studies you may wish to run.”

“Right,” Virgil said. “That’s a, uh, good point. You’re right.”

Virgil paused and Logan waited for a long moment.

“So, then,” Virgil said slowly. “No moral quandaries. Just two people sharing a bed and watching a romance movie.”

“It was a bad one,” Logan said.

“It really, really was,” Virgil agreed with a laugh, and then Logan was leaning forward towards him, and Virgil was putting his hand on his shoulder.

The door flung open. “I’m home!” Roman declared as Virgil scrambled back, hitting his head on the headboard in his haste to put distance between himself and Logan.

“Fuck,” Virgil hissed, the sharp pain almost distracting him from his mortification. Almost.

“Roman! You need to knock!” Logan yelled.

“Since when?” Roman asked, plopping down on Logan’s bed between them.

“Since we have a guest,” Logan said meaningfully. Virgil hid his reddening face in his hands, curling into as tight of a ball as possible.

“You were both in here. It’s not like one of you was going to be naked,” Roman said flippantly.

Virgil debated the merits of staying curled up in a ball for the rest of his life.

There was a second of silence, and Virgil was glad he couldn’t see the expressions on the other two’s faces from his ball when Roman said, “Oh my god!”

 Chapter 50

           The breakfast table was silent the next morning. Though, if one could call it a breakfast table when Logan was only drinking a cup of tea, Roman was chewing on a slice of unbuttered, untoasted bread, and Virgil was squirreled away in Logan’s bedroom either still asleep or avoiding them both was debatable.

           “…Look,” Roman said.

           “We aren’t talking about it.”

           “How was I supposed to know the two of you were getting it on?!” Roman said, talking about it. “Put a sock on the door next time or something. It’s common courtesy!”

           “We weren’t having sex,” Logan hissed. Roman opened his mouth. “Shut up and learn the ‘common courtesy’ of knocking.” He pointed his spoon at his roommate threateningly.

           Yet, still, because it was Roman, the other man opened his mouth once more. Luckily, before he could say anything else on the matter, there was a loud crack from the living room.

           “I’m going to need a towel please!” Patton called.

           “I’ve got it,” Roman said, jumping into motion and sprinting towards the bathroom. Logan meanwhile, stood and headed towards the living room.

           “Why are you wet?” Logan asked immediately upon taking in the sight of his roommate. His very, very soaked roommate. He was dripping water like he’d just crawled out of a pond.

           “There was an ocean in the church,” Patton replied, seeming unconcerned by the fact that he was getting their carpet wet.

           “What?” Logan asked.

           Patton pushed his sopping wet hair out of his eyes. “The time distortions were a lot more intense than the ones we’ve seen before,” he said. He held out a small innocuous appearing device whose only mechanism seemed to be a small switch. “Be really careful with that. It’s unstable, and we might have damaged it getting out.” Patton winced and removed his timepiece from his write. “Actually, speaking of that… this might need a checkup too.”

           “Were there issues with the tech?” Logan asked, taking both devices.

           “…No,” Patton said, looking a bit sheepish. “We may have… had to turn off all of the safety protocols.”

           “You what?!” Logan asked, snatching away the timepiece and clutching it to his chest. “Patton, I just made this for you!”

           “And you did a really good job!” was Patton’s reply, “but we really didn’t want to drown in a church.”

           “It was a completely new design!”

           “And it’s really good. We didn’t blow up!” Patton said with a smile.

           Logan took a slow breath. “I’ll make sure it wasn’t damaged.”

           “Thanks Lo!”

           Roman entered the living room then, bright blue towel in hand. “I have returned bearing gifts!” he proclaimed.

           “My hero,” Patton said with a laugh. He took the towel and used it to wipe off his face and then start to dry his hair.

           “So, an ocean in a church?” Logan asked.

           Patton nodded. “I’ll have to thank Virgil for suggesting the inflatable raft,” he said. “Though I think he might have cheated on that suggestion.” He paused then as he finished running the towel through his hair. “I saw Remus,” he said.

           Roman froze instantly. “You did?”

           “Uh huh,” Patton replied. “He was with Janus. I didn’t think I should say anything to him since that trip was way out of sync though. I’m sorry.”

           “Yeah, no, of course,” Roman said. “That makes sense. That’s fine. How was he?”

           “He seemed good,” Patton said. He flashed Roman a smile. “Happy. Not exactly what I expected though. He’s quite the character. I can tell he and Janus are good friends.”

           “Oh,” Roman said. “That’s… that’s good.”

           Patton’s face screwed up slightly. “He did flirt with me though, so that was weird.”

 Chapter 51

It took a few days after Patton got home for Logan to first make sure the timepiece and the distortion device were not at a risk of exploding and then to study the distortion device.

“It’s similar to what little we’ve seen of TPI technology,” Logan had mused, sitting on the couch while studying the information he’d managed to get off of it. “It’s definitely derived from the same technology unlike my time travel device, but it looks a bit different, and this version at least is rather shoddily made. Of course, creating disorder and almost ripping apart time is easier than seamlessly moving through it.”

 “So, they’re probably from my time then?” Virgil asked.

“Most likely,” Logan agreed. “Though it could always be a Remus situation where they were from another time originally but accidently ended up in the TPI time. Either way, the origin of their purposeful time travel was certainly around your time.”

Virgil glanced at the device he’d set on the table in front of them all. It looked innocent sitting there, but it had the power to destroy so much, and they didn’t even know why. “Do you think whoever made this trapped me here on purpose?” Virgil asked.

“It would be a big coincidence if you in particular got trapped in this time in particular,” Roman said.

 “I was thinking the same thing actually,” Logan said. “You do work with the TPI and with Janus, a time agent who both often is caught in the middle of devices similar to this being used and who runs into Patton frequently. Plus you know Remus, Roman’s brother even if we didn’t know that connection before you were trapped here and we already had a correspondence before you landed here. It would be strange for you to have ended up here on accident.”

“But why?” Virgil asked. “I am somehow connected to all of you, but I’m still not a time agent myself.”

 “All I am to the TPI is a walking history book. I’m not actually involved.”

“Well,” Logan said. “Perhaps someone knows something we don’t.”

“Or maybe it’s just a happy accident!” Patton said. Virgil highly doubted that and it made anxiety churn in his gut.

“Well,” Logan said, “accident or not, we do now have a solution to the issue. I’ve managed to use this device to recalibrate my calculations and we’ve gotten a ping. I know where the signal blocking Virgil’s time device is coming from.”

“Where?” Roman asked.

“It looks like a local trash dump,” Logan replied. “It must have just ended up in a trashcan that day and was emptied before we checked.”

 “Well, that should be easy enough to get,” Patton said. “Give Roman and I the exact coordinates and we can go and get it now.”

“Wait, why are we the only ones who have to dig through a garbage dump?” Roman asked.

Patton gave him a look.

“Oh,” Roman said, eyes lighting up. “Oh right!” Then, he scowled remembering he was going to be going through a garbage dump. “Fine,” he sighed.

“Think of it as an adventure!” Patton said.

“We’re time travelers. We have so many more exciting adventuring opportunities than dumpster diving, Pat-Pat,” he whined, but he still got up. “I’ll go get changed.”

 Patton stood up and handed Logan his phone, so Logan could program the location of the distortion device into it while he changed as well. “We’ll text you when we’re heading back! I’ll give you a 15- and 5-minute warning,” Patton said with a wink. Virgil immediately hid his face in his hands.

“Do you think the TPI is hiring?” Logan asked as the door closed. “I’d love to move to a different century without those two.”

“Time agents don’t usually live in 4500s,” Virgil said, face still hidden behind his hands. “They’d probably still place you in this century, especially since you’re comfortable here.”

“No escaping them then,” Logan sighed.

 “Mmm,” was Virgil’s response.

He felt Logan shift on the couch next to him and a warm palm touched his wrist, gently tugging his hand away from his face in a way that Virgil could resist if he really wanted. Virgil let the hand fall with a sigh. Logan smiled at him when he could see his face and Virgil smiled back despite how he could still feel heat in his cheeks.

“You will be going home this evening, I’d imagine,” Logan said.

“Yeah,” Virgil agreed softly.

“I would like to give you a gift before you go, if you’ll allow it.”

 “Uh, okay,” Virgil agreed.

Logan nodded and leaned back to grab something out of the pocket of a jacket that was currently hanging over the side of the couch. “Ah,” he said when he found whatever he was looking for. He glanced at Virgil. “It is a ring, by the way, but this is not a proposal.”

“Well, I’d certainly hope not,” said Virgil dryly. “An impulse elopement would be a little off brand for us both.”

Logan smiled at him. “Very true,” he agreed. Then, he opened his palm revealing a small ring.

“So, then, what is it?” Virgil asked.

 “It is an emergency time travel device,” Logan explained. “It’s not particularly complex. It can only take you here to this room between 2 weeks and one year from now, but if you ever need something from me, you can use it.”

He offered the ring and Virgil opened his palm to let him put it in his hand. He studied the ring for a moment. It was a rose gold and very light.

“It also has some security measures,” Logan said. “It wouldn’t do to make an emergency time travel device that someone else might easily try to take from you. It’ll disappear when you put it on. You’ll still be able to feel it and take it off whenever you wish. It’ll become visible again if you take it off.”

 “An invisible ring?” Virgil asked, curious.

“Yes,” Logan said with a smile. “It is designed to store your space time coordinates for up to 48 hours just so you’re aware, but as I said you can take it off whenever you wish and… I won’t use it against you.”

Virgil looked at him. “Okay,” he said. “Can I put it on?” Logan nodded, and Virgil slipped it on his finger. As promised it disappeared from view as soon as he did. He could still feel the weight of it on his finger though.

“You turn it three times counterclockwise to activate it,” Logan said, making Virgil look up from the seemingly empty space on his finger he’d been staring at.

  “It would drop you right about where you are sitting.”

“Thanks,” Virgil said. It wasn’t nearly enough to say how much he appreciated the gift, but he hoped his tone said enough.

“Don’t use it against me?” Logan asked with a half-smile, and Virgil realized just how much trust was being put onto him by giving him a device that was directly linked to their base of operations despite knowing Virgil worked with the TPI.

Virgil shook his head. “I won’t,” he said. Deciding to throw out his nervousness and embarrassment over last time he shot forward to kiss Logan quickly on the lips. They bumped noses and Logan’s glasses ended up askew in the process, but Logan didn’t seem to mind judging by his delighted laugh when they parted.

“Thank you,” Virgil said again.

“Of course,” Logan replied.

 Virgil could still feel the ring on his finger even after Patton and Roman got back from the dump with the device that had caused this whole mess. He could still feel it when Logan turned it off and his time piece reactivated. He could still feel it there when he made it home and gave an excuse as to why he’d left his trip early. He could still feel it when he got an email from an unknown sender making sure he got home okay.

  Arc IV: (To Be Named)

Chapter 52

“What’s this?” Janus asked when a giant bowl was set on the coffee table in front of him.

“We’re eating on the couch tonight,” Emile said cheerfully.

Janus raised an eyebrow and switched off the tablet he’d been using to look at him. “Why?” he asked.

Emile shrugged and set a second huge bowl down next to Janus’s. “For fun,” Emile said. He turned back towards the kitchen and Janus leaned forward to look in the bowl. It was spaghetti with some sort of creamy sauce and a few different vegetables mixed in along with some shrimp.

“I made green tea,” Emile said, coming back into the room with two mugs.

 “Thanks,” Janus said, taking one of the mugs with a small smile.

“What were you doing?” Emile asked as he took a seat beside Janus. He nodded at the deactivated screen now sitting on the end table.

“Just doing some puzzle games,” Janus said.

“That sounds fun,” Emile said with a smile.

“Head doctor said they might be a good thing to do to pass the time when I told him to fuck off after suggesting reading.”

Emile sighed. “Dr. Figueroa is my colleague. You could try to be polite.”

“I thought I was supposed to be my authentic self in therapy,” Janus replied.

 Emile just huffed and rolled his eyes. Janus couldn’t help but smile as he picked up his mug of green tea.

The last few months had been…different. In a lot of ways, Janus’s life had become harder than it had been before. It had been easy to do nothing but eat pre-prepared meals, go to work, and pass out in his empty house every day. It wasn’t good for him. He’d known it even then, but it had been easy. This was not.

Emile had offered, insisted really, that Janus move into his house for a bit just to get back on his feet.

 He’d taken time off of the TPI which would have been given to him anyway since he’d spent so trapped in the past. He’d had to give a report of what had happened, and he’d mentioned Patton, but he hadn’t mentioned everything. They’d offered him a shrink when he’d asked.

Janus had told Emile he needed to tell him something about why he’d been distant, so he wouldn’t end up chickening out, but he’d asked for a bit of time to figure out what to say. He’d finally worked up the courage to talk about it with Dr. Figueroa two weeks ago. Much like with Patton, it was easier to talk to someone who hadn’t been involved in Janus’s mistake, but it still wasn’t easy.

 He was running up on the deadline he’d given for having that talk with him. It had to happen soon, and they both knew it, but Emile was just patiently waiting for him to suck it up. It felt… wrong to use his kindness without him knowing, but it was also nice to get to spend time with his brother. He didn’t even dare to hope that he’d still have the chance once he told him.

He was moving back into his own house in less than a week. He’d tell him then so if Emile ended up kicking him out of his life, he wouldn’t have to kick him out of his home too.

 For now, though everything was fine. Harder, more complicated, and in threat of exploding at any moment, but fine. Fine wasn’t something he’d really felt in a long time. Or at least, fine while in his own time wasn’t something he’d felt in a long time. There’d been a few moments with Patton sitting next to the fire outside the hole in the ground they’d slept in for those few months where the man would turn to look at him and he’d felt fine. Yet, Patton had been right. Those moments were unsustainable with how Janus was actually feeling deep down.

 “This is good,” Janus said, after taking a couple of bites of the pasta in front of him.

“Well, I always was the only one in the house that could cook,” Emile said, and that was true. “It was either learn to defend for myself or eat a cheeseburger for every meal.”

“Hey, I had a good burger seasoning.”

“Not for every meal, Janus.”

“Meat, dairy, bread. What more could you want?”

“Vegetables, Janus.”

“You could have put pickles on!”

“I don’t like pickles.”

“That sounds like your problem, not mine,” Janus argued.

Emile shook his head, turning his eyes to the ceiling. “How have you been surviving on your own?”

 “Well, I mean,” Janus said. “Badly.”

“Right…” Emile said. He leaned over to bump their shoulders together. Janus flashed him a smile.

“Speaking of,” said Janus. “Could you physically force me to pack tonight? I meant to do it today and instead I ended up playing puzzles games.”

Emile chucked. “Sure, I’ll help you after dinner.”

“You don’t have to help me,” said Janus. “Just make me do it.”

“Maybe I want to help,” said Emile.

“Oh, yes, packing. The most entertaining of Thursday night activities.”

Emile hummed and then glanced at him. “Remember when you helped me pack for college?” he asked.

 “Mmm, I do,” Janus replied.

“I was so stressed about going somewhere new,” Emile said, “that I avoided packing for weeks. Every time Mom would ask me how packing was going, I’d tell her it was going fine but in reality, I hadn’t even started. You’d come home two days before I had to leave because you were going to help me move into my dorm. It’s like you could sense no packing had been done the moment you stepped through the front door.”

“You were doing your ‘hiding the broken horse statue from mom’ shuffle,” Janus said with a smirk.

 “Well, you walked me straight to my room and we packed everything up in those two days,” Emile said. “You made it so much easier.”

“Yeah, because I hovered over you until you did it and did half of it for you,” Janus snorted.

“It wasn’t just that,” Emile said. “You also found the music streaming station run by the university and put that on and talked about what your freshman year was like. You also had tips on what things I should and shouldn’t pack when moving into the dorm.”

“You still took all of the cartoon stuffed animals despite my advice.”

 “I thought there’d be more space on the bed,” Emile frowned.

Janus snorted.

“But anyway, just having someone else around made me happier. It wasn’t just about the workload being halved either. You being there made me feel less lonely and reminded me I’d always have someone to come back to.”

Janus internally winced. He was sure Emile hadn’t meant to make him feel guilty in any way. In fact, he probably was trying to do the opposite, but him saying that just reminded Janus that it hadn’t been true. Janus had abandoned him for literal years and hadn’t been someone he could always come back to.

 Emile had proven himself to be at least close to who he was before Janus messed with time the few last months. There were a couple of differences here and there, and Janus could not be sure if they were from him changing time or from him avoiding his brother for the past three years and him naturally changing. Most memories they shared that Janus cautiously brought up or Emile mentioned on his own were consistent with what Janus remembered, but he hadn’t pushed too hard or dug too deep. It just made him feel more guilty about avoiding the man for so long.

 It made him want to ignore the man more, because it seemed every choice Janus ever made only hurt him.

…

Well, perhaps not the college radio station when helping an anxious 18-year-old pack up his childhood bedroom.

He should probably tell Emile that his words made him feel guilty because that was obviously not the intention and he’d want to know. He should probably apologize properly for leaving him alone for three years without an explanation. He should probably provide an explanation for those three years.

He should probably go see the head doctor again soon.

(He should probably stop calling Emile’s colleague who was in the same field as him a head doctor derogatorily in his head.)

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For now, he just glanced at Emile. “You’re trying to bully me into letting you help pack with logic, aren’t you?”

“I am,” Emile confirmed without remorse.

“Fine,” Janus sighed, “but only if you let me do the dishes for you.”

Emile took a long moment to consider the offer. “You drive a hard bargain,” he said, “but okay.”

“And no doing anything sneaky like getting bags ready for me on your own while I’m doing it or the deal is off,” Janus said.

“You always think of all possible loopholes, Janus,” Emile sighed.

There was a long silence.

“Agree, you prick,” said Janus.

“No promises,” Emile replied cheekily with laughter in his eyes, and things were good for a moment more.

 Chapter 53

Today Janus was moving into his house in 24th century for the second time in his life, and honestly, the house wasn’t going to look much different than it had when he’d first moved in. Janus had unpacked his things more at Emile’s house in the past almost 6 months than he had in the two and a half years he’d liven in his house. His house held clothes, bare bone furniture, and exactly one skillet from when he’d decided to be daring and tried to cook himself an egg. All he’d really customized for himself was the setting on the LXC device which controlled the lights, media across the home, and prepackaged food ordering and prepare.

 He almost felt embarrassed that his house was so empty. Emile, of course, knew that his mental health had been fucked, but the blankness of his house was a physical reminder of this fact especially considering how he used to keep house before all of this. He’d warned Emile about the fact that his house was empty, and he had said he understood, but still.

They gathered all of the luggage in a pile in Emile’s guest room. They’d had to get permissions from the TPI to allow Emile to travel to his house, and Janus went ahead and filed to give him permanent permission to travel there.

 The decision felt far too hopeful for someone who hadn’t had that conversation with his brother yet, but it had made Emile smile in the moment.

Emile took three of the bags and Janus took the rest. He waved his arm and selected the third saved location on the device. In a moment, he was standing in the living room of his dark, empty house.

…

His supposed to be dark and empty house. More of the lights were on than Janus had ever switched on himself, and half of the windows were open. (He didn’t even know some of those windows opened.)

 They were letting in the sounds of birds that made the lakeside their home as well as cool late fall breeze. There was also a racket coming from the kitchen. Emile was beside him a second after he himself had appeared. He looked around for a moment. “Did you leave it like this?”

“No,” Janus replied.

“Do you have squatters?” He had a security system from 2 millennia in the future on his house. He highly doubted it.

“I’m going to go check the kitchen,” Janus said, moving towards the noises coming from the other room.

He stopped in the doorway to his kitchen only to see Patton standing at his kitchen counter cutting up a carrot on a cutting board Janus didn’t think he owned, and if he did, it was buried in a box somewhere.

 “What are you doing?” Janus asked.

“Cooking!” was the immediate reply.

“In my house?” Janus asked. “How do you even know where my house is?”

“I may be just a little bit ahead of you,” Patton said with a wink while tapping the side of his nose.

Janus sputtered. “This is my house!”

“I know!” He said it so cheerfully while being a purposefully obtuse asshole that Janus could help but crack a smile and shake his head. He’d missed him after spending so long alone with him though he wasn’t go to admit that to him when he’d broken into Janus’s house to…

“Again, what are you doing?”

 “I’m making you soup.”

“Why?” Janus asked.

“Well,” Patton said. “I know it’s a bit of a rough time for you, so I thought I’d give you a nice welcome home present and what better present than food!” He smiled at him widely.

Janus looked closer at what he was making. “You’re trying to prove to me you can cook.” Patton frowned at him. “Have you considered I have had enough fish stew for a lifetime?”

“Nope!” he said. “It’s entirely different this time anyway. I have carrots!”

“I don’t like carrots,” Janus lied blandly.

“Liar!” Patton declared.

“No, I’m not,” Janus continued to lie.

 “I mean, that was definitely a lie,” Emile interjected from behind Janus. He was looking at them curiously. “Er, hello, who are you?”

“This is Pat,” Janus said.

“The illegal time traveler you’ve been tracking?” Emile asked with a questioning lilt to his tone.

“Ah, yes, well,” Janus said with a cough. “We came to an understanding when stuck in pre-history.”

“And now he is cooking you soup in your house?” Emile asked.

“I’ve long since stopped trying to make sense of him,” Janus grumbled.

“Well,” Emile said. “Hello Pat.”

“You can call me Patton,” he said easily. “I hope it’s nice to meet me, because I’ve already met you.”

 “We haven’t been meeting in the correct order,” Janus informed Emile. “So, he’s apparently already met you which will happen in your future. It is also something he shouldn’t be talking about,” he scolded. Patton took that with a shrug.

“I hate time travel,” Emile said, his nose scrunching up. “Isn’t life already confusing enough.”

Janus winced, not relishing the upcoming conversation with him about how confusing his life was now because of time travel.

“Don’t you work with the TPI too?” Patton asked.

“That doesn’t mean I like time travel,” Emile said. “I’m a stationary agent and I like that just fine.”

 “Time travel can be a bit complicated sometimes,” Patton acknowledged, “but I don’t think it’s all bad.” He finished chopping up the carrot and turned to put it in the self-regulating soup pot. Janus squinted at it. It was certainly not something Patton had in the 21st century. So, the question was. Had he gone out and bought time appropriate cookware before breaking into Janus’s house or had he gone through Janus’s storage to find it?

“You’re a free agent time traveler, right?” Emile asked.

“Depends on what you mean by free agent,” Patton said. “I have always worked with a group of people, and we have rules and procedures. It’s basically a time agency itself, just not the TPI.”

 “And you’ve met me before?”

“I have,” Patton confirmed, “but Janus is right in that I can’t say much more than that about it. In fact,” he said wiping off his hands on a towel hanging from his apron. (The apron was covered in cartoon squirrels and totted the phrase ‘I’m a nut for baking.’) “I should probably be getting out of here.”

“You’ve never been worried about us meeting out of order before,” Janus pointed out with a frown. He didn’t particularly want Patton to go even though the man had broken into his house and possibly went through his boxes of kitchen equipment.

 “Well,” Patton said. “There’s meeting wildly out of order, there’s meeting in order, and then there’s what I’m doing.”

“What are you doing?” Janus asked alarmed.

Patton just shrugged with a smile.

“No, Patton, what are you doing?”

“Soup should be done in about an hour, but you can leave it on all day. I got a pot that’s fridge safe, so just shut it off and stick it in there before going to sleep.”

“Patton.”

“See you later! Bye!” He said and disappeared into thin air.

Janus sighed and rubbed the bridge of his brow. “Why is he like this?”

 “Janus,” Emile asked. “Why did your self-declared mortal enemy make you soup?”

“Because he’s an asshole, that’s why.”

“Uh huh,” Emile said, looking at him oddly.

“What?” Janus asked.

“What exactly happened when you were stuck in the past?” Emile asked.

Janus sighed. “A lot happened. A lot.” He glanced at the soup pot happily performing its function on his kitchen counter. ‘I hope it’s nice to meet me, because I’ve already met you,’ rang in his ears. Fucking Patton with his little hints about the future. It gave Janus just a bit of courage though knowing that Emile at least didn’t flee the continent after the conversation they had to have. He was at least around enough to meet Patton. “In fact,” Janus said. “It’s probably time I told you what happened. Everything that happened.”

 Chapter 54

They sat down in the living room. Janus let Emile have the couch and sat on one of the matching armchairs. There was a squeaky sound when he sat. The plastic covering the chair had been delivered in was still on it.

Emile had a pleasant, open but curious expression on his face and Janus suddenly had an idea what it felt like to be his patient.

“I,” Janus began after a moment, shifting uncomfortably on the squeaky chair. “I don’t know how to start this conversation. I talked about what I wanted to say and possible ways to say it with Dr. Figueroa, but I… I still don’t know.”

 “I guess I should start by saying that I did something horrible that I need to apologize for and I’m not sure if apologizing will even be enough. The problem is you don’t even know what that horrible thing is.” Janus stared at his feet. “So, first, I should probably explain what I did. I just don’t know where to start.”

“Maybe start with what happened before it,” Emile suggested. “Just lead up to it. It might help explain why whatever it was happened too.”

Janus took a breath. “Okay,” he said. “That day was just like most that I remember. We both woke up early. I was going to the TPI and you were going to where you worked your residency. We ate leftover pizza for breakfast because both of us were exhausted. You because it sucks to be a resident and me because I’d been working on a big case.”

 “I was getting frustrated with the case. That was my first mistake: being impatient and angry. It was just a thief, but a slippery one. She’d stolen a half-broken time piece and was using it to rob banks within about a 50-year time frame. I had an idea of where she might go, but no one would listen to me. Or at least,” Janus quirked a half smile, “that’s how I interpreted it. They said they’d look into my idea, but they were being extra cautious because of how close in the timestream her actions were to most of the agents’ lives.”

 “I was so tired of the case and so egotistical. I decided to check it out on my own without being cleared by the TPI. I went back in time without thinking of the consequences and that was the worst thing I’ve ever done.” Janus took a breath. “I’m not sure how, but somewhere in the course of my self-appointed mission…” He trailed off. He didn’t know how to say it. He really didn’t.

“What happened?” Emile asked when he didn’t continue.

“I…” and his next words probably sounded like crackly nonsense to Emile’s ears because he couldn’t get his thoughts straight and his tongue wouldn’t make the words right.

 “I don’t even remember living in that town or the fact that Mom used to work at that bank,” he choked out. “I didn’t think and I didn’t check and…” There was a long silence. “I erased you,” he finally managed to say in a whisper, but in the quiet of his barely lived in house, the words were loud.

There was more silence. “But I…” Emile said after a moment.

“I went back and fixed it,” Janus said, “but I… didn’t do a perfect job. I don’t even know how much I messed things up. It would have been one thing if it’d just been me. If it had just impacted my life, but I did it to you and I don’t even know how to start to apologize.”

 Nothing was said for a long moment. Janus didn’t look at him.

“…Huh,” Emile finally said.

Janus risked a glance at him. He didn’t look irate, but he did still look confused which was probably the reason for that.

“I’m sorry,” Janus said. It was really the only thing he could say at this point.

Emile tilted his head to the side. He took off his glasses and cleaned them with the edge of his shirt with slow circles. Since he was 15, Emile only cleaned his glasses with specially designed wipes, but he’d held onto the habit of cleaning his glasses with his shirt anytime he needed a moment to think. Janus wasn’t sure if Emile even realized he was doing it, but he knew it was a signal for Janus to be quiet for a few seconds.

 The glasses were perched back on Emile’s nose after a few seconds. “I think I remember that,” he said contemplatively.

“…What?” Janus asked, and he was no longer avoiding looking at Emile. He was now blatantly staring at him.

“Well, I didn’t know what it was,” Emile said, “but I did have a very odd dream on the day you mentioned and suspiciously I had said dream in the middle of the day and woke standing up.”

“A dream?” Janus asked.

“A very vivid dream,” Emile said. “I don’t believe you actually erased me completely from existence. My life was simply shifted slightly. I was working as a social worker for about 5 hours and then I was back in my appropriate place.”

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“Why didn’t you tell me about that?” Janus asked, but then immediately wince at his own hypocrisy. “Er… never mind.”

“I didn’t know it was possibly real,” Emile said. “Honestly, I thought I was just really tired. I’d been overworking myself a lot. I took the rest of the day off after that.”

“You shifted reality for a few hours, and you didn’t realize it?” Janus asked.

“Like I said, I was really tired and nothing seemed to be wrong…”

“Wait, but things were different,” Janus said. “Didn’t you notice things were different.”

“Not… really,” Emile said. “Like what?”

“Like…” Janus said. “Like a whole bunch of things!”

 “Like…?”

“Like you had a different job title and you worked different hours.”

“I thought I’d fallen asleep standing up or had a vivid audio-visual hallucination at work from stress. I asked for a switch a couple of weeks later.”

“You used to hate time travel, but then you took a job at the TPI.”

Emile gave him a drawl look. “I still hate time travel,” he said. “I literally just said that not 5 minutes ago.”

“Well then why would you work for the TPI.”

“Because time travel is so confusing and distressing that people doing it on a regular basis as a career need psychological support.”

 “Plus, Lia asked for my consultation when developing the mental health part of the Agent Management Office,” Emile continued. “Considering I already knew quite a bit about time travel from being around you, she knew me personally, and I’d finished my residency, she decided to give me a job offer when my advice panned out.”

“W-well,” Janus said. “You were allergic to pineapples.”

“You mean my childhood allergy?” Emile asked. “That has since resolved itself in my adult life?”

“It has?” Janus asked.

“Janus have you considered,” Emile said, “that some if not all of the inconsistencies you were seeing in my life have to do with the fact that you hadn’t spoken to me in 3 years?”

 “I… uh… hadn’t considered that,” Janus admitted honestly.

“You were looking for information to support your incorrect world view,” Emile said sounding very much like a head doctor and not like a brother, “and you found some.” He sighed. “It makes sense after having faced a traumatic event where you effectively thought you’d killed a loved one that you weren’t thinking clearly.” The head doctor analysis voice slipped just a bit. “I just wish you’d talked about it with someone.”

“Sorry,” Janus said, because no matter which way this conversation had gone and no matter the revelations, the point was an apology. “I’m sorry.”

 Emile sighed. “I would have forgiven you even if you had erased me,” Emile said. “You didn’t mean to, and you did your best to fix it. You did fix it even if you were an idiot about it.”

“What about for being an idiot and not talking to you for three years?” Janus asked.

“I already did forgive you for that Janus,” Emile said pointedly. “What did you think the last 6 months were?”

“Pity?”

Emile gave him his disappointed and exasperated head shake. “Promise to never do anything like that to me again,” he said, “and I’ll forgive you.”

 “I promise,” Janus said immediately.

“And in the future, you’ll talk to me if you have any issue even if you think it’s horrible.”

“I think I’ve learned by lesson on that one.”

“And that goes for other people too,” Emile said. “If anything goes wrong with someone, you talk to them or if that’s too hard you talk to someone so they can convince you to talk to that person.”

Janus nodded.

“Great!” Emile said. “Then you’re officially forgiven for everything. Though I expect you to go to therapy and keep working on making yourself feel better, so these things don’t happen again.”

 And Janus… didn’t know how to feel about that. He should probably feel happy and thankful or at least relieved, but if he was being honest, he just felt kind of empty in that moment like an old well that had finally run dry. Fuck his head doctor and fuck Patton. Wasn’t this supposed to make him feel better? Everything was fine. He hadn’t actually erased Emile permanently from the timeline, in fact, he’d apparently still existed in some form in the alternate timeline Janus had temporarily made. Emile had forgiven him both for erasing him and ignoring him even though that was far more than Janus deserved. This was something he’d never even dared dream would happen, but it had been exactly what he’d wanted.

 Yet, he still didn’t feel good, not really, not like how he remembered feeling before all of this happened.

Though was that really a surprise? Things were not like how they were before. He and Emile were no longer close. There was love and affection there, but they didn’t really know each other. The last six months had been nice. He’d been able to pretend for a bit that everything was back to normal, but in the moments he hadn’t been able to pretend that, it’d been a bit stilted and awkward speaking to his brother especially at the start.

 Beyond that, Janus was just used to misery at this point. It was his default state. Not being miserable took effort and energy he didn’t always have. He felt himself slipping into sadness or numbness even during times he should be feeling good. He’d noticed himself experiencing a sense of desolation when Emile cooked his favorite meal or in the middle of watching a ballet performance Emile had suggested they go to and he’d been looking forward to in the days before or even now when he should be so happy, so ecstatic. Everything should be okay, but it wasn’t.

 “You doing alright over there?” Emile asked, and Janus didn’t know how long he’d been silent.

Instinct said to say yes and force himself to move on, but he wasn’t going to break his promise that fast. “Not really, no,” he admitted.

“That’s okay,” Emile said. “Anything I can do to help?”

“I really don’t know.”

“Why don’t we go taste the soup your arch nemesis,” there was a light teasing tone to his voice, “made for you. Some of the vegetables won’t be completely cooked yet, but I’m sure it’s already good.”

“Yeah,” Janus agreed. “Yeah, okay,” he got to his feet, the chair making that plastic squeaking sound again. “Maybe we could unwrap the furniture in here before you go home.”

“I think that’s a good idea,” Emile said with a smile.

 Chapter 55

Somehow, the strangest thing about his life right now was a picture on the wall. It was one that he’d gotten after college when he moved into his first actual house. It wasn’t anything special. It was just something that had caught his eye when he was specifically looking for something classier to put on his wall than the posters he’d hung in his college dorm and apartment with Virgil. It was a tall painting of a tree, but segmented into four parts, each representing the state of a tree in different seasons. In the top left, the three had small leaves and little buds, on the top right it had full leaves bathed in sunlight, in the bottom left the leaves had changed colors and started to fall off, and in the bottom right the tree was devest of leaves but covered in snow.

 It was on the wall near Janus’s bed. It was one of the first things he saw when he opened his eyes in the morning and was usually what reminded him that everything was different now when he woke.

The picture had been in a box in the houses garage up until the Saturday before the last. Saturdays had become his and Emile’s unofficial unpacking Janus’s house day. They would usually pick one or maybe two boxes that had been sitting untouched for years, unpack it, talk, and eat dinner together.

Notably, dinner was usually not provided by either of them.

 Patton had gotten into the habit of breaking into Janus’s house. Janus would sometimes catch him doing it briefly, but often Patton managed to avoid him. This was quite the feat considering Janus was not currently working and thus stayed at home a lot of the time. Patton had repeatedly reprogrammed Janus’s kitchen taking away the option for pop tarts entirely and replacing the option with real food. Janus’s kitchen was constantly stocked with something to eat that wasn’t trash. He also liked to leave around different smelling hand soaps, flowers, and paper cranes. Janus had an entire drawer in his nightstand dedicated to storing paper cranes now.

 The newest one was still on his nightstand from the night before, sitting cheerfully in the way of his view of the tree paining when his alarm woke up that morning. He sighed. He had not missed getting up early for work.

He was finally going back to working at the TPI this morning. His therapist had signed off on it last week, saying his was fit for duty. Considering they were apparently still understaffed at the TPI and Janus was a senior agent, this was met with much relief. Janus himself still wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

 He turned off the alarm and stood. Dr. Figueroa had him write out a morning schedule to follow when he’d expressed his struggle to get the day started. Either Patton or Emile had taken it upon themselves to copy the schedule on virtual sticky notes that appeared in every location necessary for getting ready in the morning.

First, he took a shower. He threw his nightclothes in the laundry chute. There were currently dozens of different scented soaps in his shower all in small bottles that had about 2 or 3 uses. Janus presumed they were curtesy of Patton. He decided to use one at random and it ended up being cotton candy scented.

 Next, he got dressed. That was easy enough since he always wore the same outfit to work every day. It didn’t matter what he wore much since missions would force him to redress anyway.

Then he went to his kitchen and sat down at the counter. He pushed the pop tart button. As expected at this point, he did not get a pop tart for breakfast. Instead, he got two eggs, toast, a sliced apple, and a few cherry tomatoes with green tea. He ate his breakfast while finishing one of the puzzles he’d been working on the night before.

 Once he finished, it was time to finally face going back to the office. He sighed, stood up and pulled up the screen on his timepiece. He selected his office as his destination and was off.

The first thing that happened upon appearing in his office was he got a face full of… something.

He sputtered, smacking the things fluttering about his face out of the air. “What is wrong with you?” was the first thing out of his mouth before he’d even really confirmed that the culprit of this attack was who he’d automatically assumed he was.

Remus, as anticipated was standing not 2 feet away from him.

 Remus had apparently gotten into the prop department again because he had some type of softly glowing glittery confetti was no all over Janus as well as their entire office.

“Remus, I told you no!” Lena snapped. “You know it’s impossible to clean up 3150s sparkle nukes.”

“Welcome back!” Remus crowed.

“I hate you,” Janus replied. “I just took a shower.”

“You’re fine,” Remus said with an eye roll.

“This shit doesn’t come off in decontamination,” Janus spat. “If my first mission back sends me to a time where I’ll be tried as a witch for glowing, I’m blaming you.”

 “We’re going to 2510,” Remus informed him. “You’ll fit right in.”

Janus grimaced. “Ugh, that decade.”

“It’s my favorite decade!” Remus exclaimed.

“Of course, it is,” Lena grumbled. “Just don’t bring anything gross back this time.”

“No promises,” Remus replied.

Janus chose to disengage from the conversation as Remus and Lena argued about was and what wasn’t allowed to be brought back to their shared office from what was well known as the least tasteful decade in history. It was also one of the least turbulent decades in history. The population was too busy making shitty ice cream flavors to wage war.

 At least they were giving him an easier assignment for his first time back. He turned to his desk and pulled up the files on his next mission, glancing through them. It was just a small blip that the TPI had noticed in a small town in 2510. It probably wasn’t much of anything, but they had no record of what had caused it, so they were going to send someone to look. Honestly, they’d usually just send in a surveillance agent and be done with it, but they’d probably handpicked this one for Janus in particular. He’d be insulted if he didn’t honestly still feel a bit off kilter being in the office.

 To his surprise, he didn’t have a scheduled meeting with Rhi. It wasn’t particularly important to see a mission coordinator for something this small, but it still wasn’t the usual protocol. Instead, he was just instructed to pick up his costume at the costuming department and leave in about an hour.

“Do we really not have an appointment with Rhi?” Janus asked.

“Senior agents haven’t really been meeting with Rhi unless it’s a high priority mission,” Lena told him. “We have too many newbies running around and there’s not time.

“That’s concerning…” Janus said.

“It’s better than trying to rush the inexperienced ones through. We at least have a general idea of what we’re doing. They’re trying to train up more mission coordinators, but that’s taking a while.”

 Janus still frowned, but he glanced back at the mission instructions. He’d have to make sure he thoroughly understood what was being asked of him before leaving if he wasn’t meeting with Rhi. “We should go get changed,” he told Remus. “2510s clothing is notoriously difficult to put on.”

“Five minutes back and he’s already dying to get my clothes off,” Remus said cheekily.

“I would rather tear my own eyeballs out of my socket than see you without your pants on again.”

Remus just wiggled his eyebrows.

“I’m so glad you’re back,” said Lena when Janus looked at her in exasperation. “He’s finally not Fred’s and my problem anymore.”

 Chapter 56

Getting ready for the mission was a bit of a mess honestly. The costume department barely even spared them a glance before sending them on their way. Remy at least was still there to give them one last debrief before sending them off into 2510, though he looked exhausted.

“Are you sleeping?” asked Janus.

“I’m drinking coffee,” was the reply as he shooed them out onto the streets.

The timeline disturbance that had been picked up was somewhere in one of the shops on that street.

“Do you want the bakery or the karaoke/stripper bar?” Remus asked.

Janus raised an eyebrow at him, and Remus clapped him on the back.

“This is why we’re partners,” he said.

 He plodded off towards the building to their right, and Janus turned to the building on the left. It was a small bakery and coffee shop painted in bright colors and sporting the Brazilian and Albanian flags.

There was a soft tinkling bell sound when he entered the shop, and the person behind the counter glanced over at him briefly before finishing putting a pastry in bag for a customer.

Unfortunately, their attention meant Janus wasn’t going to get away with snooping around the store without buying anything. He glanced around the interior of the shop as he walked up to the till.

 He glanced into the bakery display case the worker was standing behind. Oh… oh that all looked disgusting. He was not depressed enough anymore to willingly eat any of that.

“Uh,” Janus said when the worker looked at him. He glanced up at the wide selection of drinks over their head and winced at the ways the letters moved on the screen. He was pretty sure his dyslexia wasn’t quite that bad. Why did anyone choose to make letters move around and shake on purpose? As someone who had to deal with that on a daily basis, it wasn’t exactly entertaining.

 “Is it possible to get a banana and chocolate potato chip smoothie, but without the potato chip part?” he asked.

“Sure,” the worker replied. “Anything else?”

Janus shook his head.

“Can I have a name for that?”

“Jay,” Janus replied.

“Alright. It’ll be out in a minute.”

Janus nodded and turned, able to take in the rest of the establishment now that there weren’t eyes on him. It was as colorful on the inside as it was on the outside and seemed to have a retro cowboy-space theme mixed with posters from a contemporary werewolf romance movie. Janus had actually seen that movie one. It was surprisingly tolerable.

 The seats at least looked comfortable. There were a good number of tables and three couches. All of them were mix-matched. A few of the tables were outfitted with holographic chess and checkers, but most were normal tables. There were even a few physical boardgames and some bookshelves full of books, though he thought some of the bookshelves might just be there for decoration. He wasn’t sure which were and which weren’t.

He pretended to be very interested in the decorations as he waited on his drink, using that as an excuse to look around the entire shop. He was turned away when the door chimed again.

 “Hello,” a familiar voice said, making Janus turn around instantly. Janus could immediately tell that the man hesitantly lingering in front of the bakery display was not the Patton that he’d spent months holed up with or who had broken into Janus’s house repeatedly to replace his soaps and cook him meals. He seemed out of place which was saying something in 2510. He had the air about him that he was an 80-year-old grandpa trying to embrace youth culture, but not quite getting it. He also spoke in an accent that people around him would probably assume was him just not being fluent in Spanish but was actually him not being completely comfortable speaking Spanish from half a century ago.

 “Uh…” said Patton looking at the menu, a crease between his eyes.

“I’d suggest the banana and chocolate potato chip smoothie without the potato chips,” Janus said. Patton startled, whipping around to face him in surprise. “That’s what I got, though I would leave out the potato chips.”

Patton’s eyes narrowed on him. It was not, of course, the first time that Patton hadn’t been thrilled to see him, but it was the first time Janus had been happy to see him and he hadn’t been happy to see him in turn. Janus had gotten used to a Patton that liked him and he found himself not quite prepared for the way he pursed his lips in annoyance at the sight of Janus.

 “I’ll do the banana and chocolate potato chip smoothie, but with the potato chips,” he said in a way that made it sound like he thought he was getting one up on Janus for some reason.

“What flavor of chips?” the worker asked.

“Er, what flavors do you have?”

“Uh, I think drywall, oak wood, and limestone.”

Janus almost laughed at his expression. “Uh, do you have any naturally edible flavors?” he asked.

“We might have grass.”

Patton squinted as the worker bent to look under the cabinet. “Oh, wait, no, it’s glass. Is that alright?”

“…Maybe just no on the chips.”

 Janus did his best to school his features, so it wasn’t obvious he was laughing at him. He didn’t think he did a very good job considering Patton was glaring at him after turning around. That or he was just already pissed at Janus by default. It could go either way honestly.

“So,” Janus said when the worker turned away to start making Patton’s drink. “What are you doing here.”

“It’s none of your business,” Patton said with narrowed eyes.

“I mean, we could both be here for the same reason,” Janus pointed out. “We could share intel.”

“I doubt we’re here for the same reason.”

 “How would you know?” asked Janus.

Patton just looked away from him. He immediately looked confused at the movie poster his eyes landed on.

“Unless,” Janus said curiously, you aren’t here for a reason, reason.” Patton said nothing. “It was a pretty small disturbance, so it would make sense that your equipment might not pick up on it.” At least at this point. “Acting the tourist, Pat?”

“I’m just doing research,” Patton said, crossing his arms.

“Research?” Janus asked.

“I’ve never been here before,” Patton admitted. “I wanted to get a feel for it and other places just in case there ever was an issue.”

 “You just did France, didn’t you?” Janus asked.

Patton frowned and Janus smiled slightly. “It was recent,” he admitted.

“Well,” Janus said. “If you want some advice. I’d start with figuring out accents when you’re in different times.”

“I don’t need your advice,” Patton said and then smugly, “Janus.”

It took a bit for Janus to scan back through his memories and remember that Patton hadn’t known Janus’s name in France. He would have only figured it out after his friend Lo hacked into Silver Mountains University’s system and figured out Virgil had an appointment with him. Janus raised an eyebrow. “You sure about that, Patton?”

 He frowned, pouting like whenever Janus told him he wasn’t allowed to try to catch a bird and make it their pet. It was strange to meet a version of Patton who had not lived in a hole in the ground with him for months when Janus had already done that. Patton was on the back foot for once throughout this conversation. Every time before this, he’d managed to somehow twist it around even when he’d been younger than he was right now. When Janus had arrested him at the University, he’d managed to figure out his equipment wouldn’t be stopped by the TPI’s despite having no idea what the TPI was.

 In France, even when Janus had thought he’d been winning by taking his phone, he ended up getting access to a University in Janus’s time with information on the TPI, a situation that still had not been resolved.

Today, however, Janus knew far more about Patton than Patton expected. He still didn’t know exactly what his agency or whatever it should actually be called did, but he knew some things about it. He knew Patton was from the 21st century which explained the anachronisms in his speech in different times.

“You could help me look if you’d like,” Janus offered casually.

 “Why?” Patton asked suspiciously.

Janus shrugged. It was not because he missed him, he insisted to himself. It wasn’t because after spending so much time with him, not getting to talk with him all day was strange. It had nothing to do with the fact that the few times he’d ran into a farther along version of Patton since he’d moved back home, their interactions had been brief and tinged with something. No, the only reason Janus was inviting him along was so he could teach this younger version a few things, so he hopefully didn’t go about messing up time. “We worked well together in France, didn’t we?” he asked. “Besides, it’s just a small mission without much danger to the timeline.”

 “Pat,” the person at the counter called. Patton turned to him to go grab his smoothie, thanking the worker before turning back around and walking over to Janus.

“Fine,” he said. “I’ll help, but you have to answer my questions.”

“I’ll answer the questions that won’t endanger any timelines or secrets of my agency.”

Patton considered it for a moment, taking a sip of his drink. “Fine,” he agreed.

“Good,” Janus replied. “We’ll start by looking around the coffee shop for anything unusual. Did you have any questions now. It’d look more natural to be walking around if we were having a conversation.”

“Does the glitter in your hair have to do with the style of the time or…?”

Janus sighed.

 Chapter 57

Luckily, the cashier didn’t seem to think them snooping around was very odd. To be fair, the shop had quite a few odd decorations to look at. So, perhaps employees were just used to people walking around and looking at all of the different things. It helped that Janus and Patton were talking as they searched. They just looked like a couple… of friends… casually chatting and exploring the coffee shop together.

“So,” Patton said, keeping his voice quiet, though luckily the few patrons were on the other side of the shop. “What exactly is it that you do working for the TPI?”

 “Well,” Janus said. “I’m a senior field agent. That means I am the person who actually goes on missions in different times. These missions can range from tracking down people who are committing crimes using time travel, stopping anything or anyone that could damage the timestream, and helping waylaid time travelers.”

“So, there are different types of agents?” Patton asked, curiously.

“Yes,” Janus replied. “There are a lot, but only four type time travel on a regular basis.” Should he be telling a very young version of Patton this? Probably not, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care too much.

 “There are surveillance, touchdown, field, and cleanup agents,” he explained. “Surveillance agents do a bunch of things including research about the exact time field agents are going to and figuring out the best places for them to enter the timestream. Touchdown agents come slightly before field agents to do last second checks and stay when field agents are out. They mostly are just there to intervene if there are any unforeseen issues. Field agents actually interact with people from other times on a daily basis as they slip into the timestream and find whatever person or object they’re looking for. Cleanup agents come in afterwards and tie up any loose ends as well as observe the area for a few days to make sure nothing happened that no one caught.”

 “Everyone else who works at the TPI is mostly in research and management. They don’t usually travel, though everyone who works there is licensed to travel if necessary.”

“That’s a lot of people,” Patton commented.

“What we do is important. We want to make sure we are doing it correctly.” It was honestly not meant to be a jab, but Janus could see Patton frown. He decided to change the subject. “Right now, we’re looking for something that’s causing a small disturbance.”

“What type of thing could cause a disturbance? Is it always a machine like the one in France?”

“No,” Janus replied. “That was actually unusual.” He thought for a second. “At least that used to be unusual, but lately we’ve seen more and more of that sort of thing.”

 They were currently standing at a bookshelf, but nothing pinged Janus’s interest or time piece, so they moved on to look at a few of the movie posters. Patton seemed to grow more and more concerned the longer he looked at the posters.

“So, what is it usually?”

“Well,” said Janus. “Some things are natural events. No one’s really sure what causes those. There are theories, but I’m not really involved in that. We leave those alone for the most part if we find those. They’re usually small things, though on occasion they’re a bit bigger. Usually, time disturbances are caused by someone messing up. They say something wrong that gets someone curious and creates a butterfly or they leave an object that doesn’t exist in the time.”

 “So, what do you think this one is?” Patton asked curiously.

“Well,” Janus said. “It’s a rather small disturbance, so it won’t be anything too major. Probably just an object out of place.”

“Hmm,” Patton replied. “Well, I’ve always been good at those find the difference games.”

“Have you now?” Janus said, unable to stop a slight grin from ghosting over his face.”

“Mhmm,” replied Patton. He drained the rest of his smoothie and then turned around, facing away from the wall of posters they’d been looking at. He slowly scanned the room, an action a lot less inconspicuous than what Janus had them doing, but he didn’t protest for now.

 “That’s weird,” Patton declared, pointing rather obviously at a shelf. Janus noticed a woman looking at him funny. “Well,” Patton continued. “More like it isn’t weird, which is weird for here.”

Janus glanced at the shelf full of small figurines. Most of them were of mythical creatures: werewolves, dragons, and even one not even Janus recognized. Janus would guess, especially judging by the plethora of movie posters that they were all from movies or something of the like. However, Patton was correct there was one that stuck out from the rest. It was still a figurine, but unlike the rest, it was of a real animal: a cow.

 “That is odd,” Janus agreed, peering at the cow. Figuring Patton had already been obvious enough, Janus stepped over to the shelf to study it more closely. When looking at it more closely, it became obvious that the cow was very unlike everything else on the shelf. It wasn’t even really a figurine like the ones around it. It looked more like a children’s toy. It’s fur was made out of a soft looking material instead of the stiff plastic of the werewolf next to it.

“It doesn’t really fit in with the collection, does it?” a voice asked from behind Janus.

 Janus winced internally at the fact that a civilian had just noticed him acting oddly, but kept his face smooth externally as he turned to face the woman standing behind him.

“My friend and I were wondering what it was from,” Janus said evenly. “We recognized the rest of the figures, but I’m not sure where this one came from.”

“Well, that’s because it didn’t come from anything,” the woman said. “At least that I know of. I just didn’t know where to put the thing, so I put it on my movie figurine shelf.”

“Ah,” said Janus, a politely interested crinkle to his brow. “Where did you get it then?”

 “A young kid came by about, oh, a week ago. He looked like a high school kid or maybe college. He seemed right confused and upset. He said he didn’t have any money on him, and got weird when I tried to ask him about his parents. I ended up giving him a free drink and let him sit here for a couple’a hours. We got to talking about my collections. See, I have a deal that if someone brings me back something of interest for my displays, they get a free drink. He insisted on giving me that in exchange for the drink even though I told him I’d given him the drink ‘cause he seemed upset.”

 “I don’t even particularly want the thing, but he said he didn’t want it anyway, and he insisted, so I took it.”

“Interesting,” Janus said. “Do you mind if I touch it?”

“Go ahead,” she said with a shrug.

He reached forward to pick up the cow and felt the softest of fizzles that only someone who regularly time traveled would feel. Despite already knowing this must be what he’d come for, he still subtlety set his timepiece to scan it.

 Patton was peering over her shoulder now. “If both you and the person who gave it to you don’t care much about it, do you think we could buy it off of you?” he asked. “I’m a big fan of cows.”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I guess,” she agreed. “If you really like it. I don’t know what else I’d do with it.”

“How much?” Janus asked.

“Well it only cost me a Lemon CastelWalk and a scone, so about 12.”

“Sure,” Janus agreed, pulling out his wallet and forking over the currency. “Thanks,” he said.

“No problem,” she replied. “Hope you can find some use for it.”

 Janus gave her a smile and then looked at Patton. “I think it’s about time to go, don’t you think.”

Patton nodded. “Thank you for the cow statue,” he told the woman as they left the shop. They walked a bit down the street. Patton turned to him once they were out of sight of the shop window. “So, that’s it?” he asked.

Janus nodded and checked his time piece which had finished it’s scan. “The fabric is from the late 43rd century,” he confirmed, “but that’s not all. It’s stranger than that.”

“Stranger how?” Patton asked.

“The materials are definitely from the 43rd century,” Janus said, “but it’s not from the 43rd century.”

“What do you mean?”

 “This,” Janus said, looking at the cow. “This doesn’t exist. Every object has traces of where it’s been no matter how much you clean it. My timepiece can register debris sticking to an object down to the microscopic level and give a general idea where and when they came from. There’s no time travel residue implying it came from the 43rd century or even just dust or dirt from that time period. There isn’t even anything on it from this time period from more than the week the shop owner said it was in her possession. My scans seem to be saying, this thing popped into existence a week ago and didn’t exist in any time or place before that.

Patton frowned. “Well then, what does that mean?”

“I don’t know,” answered Janus frowning down at it. “I have absolutely no idea.”

 Chapter 58

Janus didn’t know what to make of the cow he’d gotten in 2510. He’d said goodbye to the young version of Patton and grabbed Remus before heading back to the TPI. He’d immediately handed the time anomaly over to the labs, but even after a few weeks, he hadn’t heard anything back yet. The labs seemed just as stumped as he was.

The older version of Patton still drifted in and out of his life, usually unseen, like a ghost in the night. Well, a ghost that cooked him plenty of healthy food.

It felt odd slipping back into his old routine of missions.

 Sometimes it felt like no time had passed, but then he’d see the faces of new recruits or get a mission where he didn’t see Rhi and remember that things were different now. The TPI was strained, constantly running after time distortions with no idea what or who was causing them. The new recruits were stumbling to catch up to the agents who knew what they were doing but were still needed to fill the gaps. It made Janus grimace, but he didn’t know what the solution was.

It was nice to be able to talk to Emile about these things.

 If Patton made sure he was taking care of himself at home with nice meals and an ever-changing option of soaps and shampoos, Emile made sure he was taking care of himself at work. Janus was now forced to have a water bottle at his desk to make sure he wasn’t spending the day dehydrated and, assuming he was not on a mission, Emile would either drag him away to eat lunch or bring lunch too him if he was too busy. Today was the later kind of day. Emile had messaged him about 45 minutes ago asking if he was free and then had taken his order for a local restaurant when Janus said he had too much to do.

 There was a knock on the door and both Fred and Janus, the only two occupants of the office at the moment looked up.

“I’ll get it,” Janus said, getting up before Fred did. He knew Fred was currently in the middle of a report on a trip to 2000B.C. he and Lena went to. They’d let a new recruit tag alone for training purposes. It had gone badly to say the least. Fred looked exhausted and stressed which was unlike the usually cheery man.

Janus shuffled to the door and opened it. A man in his early 30s that Janus didn’t recognize was standing there.

 “Hi,” he said. “I, uh, moved into the office next door. My name is Dave.”

There was a moment of silence. “Did you need something Dave.”

“Right,” he said. “Yeah, I was just wondering if your integrator is running, because mine isn’t.”

Janus glanced back at the report he’d been working on. “Yeah, it’s fine.”

“Well, is it, like, connecting to the TPI system?”

“I don’t know,” said Janus, “I was working locally.”

“Yeah, well that’s the problem with mine. I was wondering if anyone else was having the same problem.”

“Let me check,” said Janus, walking over to his desk. He went to open his email and an error message popped up.

 That was… odd to say the least. The TPI had very, very reliable technology. If it was just Janus who could not access the system, he’d assume it was just a local problem, but if the next door neighbor also was having an issue, that could smell trouble.

“Fred,” Janus called. “Are you connected to the internet?”

Fred glanced down at his integrator and clicked a couple of buttons. “No,” he said.

“Hmm,” Janus said. He pulled up his timepiece. That at least connected to the TPI servers, so the servers themselves weren’t down, just the offices’ connection to them. “Well, I can still connect with my timepiece.”

 “Same,” said Fred.

“So, what’s wrong?” Dave asked. “How do we fix it?”

“We don’t fix it,” Janus said. “We submit a tech support request.”

“Oh,” said Dave. “…How do you do that?”

Janus sighed and flicked his wrist to project a screen. “If you go to the web on your timepiece, it’s literally on the page that automatically pops up,” he said pointing.

“We can connect to the internet through our timepieces?” Dave asked.

“…Did you have any training?” Janus asked.

“Don’t be rude,” Fred said absently, still typing on his report.

Janus just rolled his eyes.

“Not on… that part. They did give me a handbook.”

 “Have you read it?” Janus asked.

Dave shrugged which told Janus everything he needed to know.

“Just go back to your office,” Janus told Dave. “I’ll submit the tech support request this time since it’s affecting me as well but read your handbook and familiarize yourself with your timepiece for goodness’s sake.”

“Okay,” Dave said, turning around and wandering back to his office with no thoughts in his eyes.

“I’m not your fucking preschool teacher,” Janus muttered under his breath as he returned to his desk. “It’s not my job to hold your hand and wipe your ass.”

Fred glanced up at him. “Thanks for not saying that when he was still in the room,” he said.

Janus shot him a thumbs up.

 He sat down at his desk and quickly submitted a tech support request. By the time he finished that, Emile was knocking on the door with a bag of food.

“Come in,” Janus said to him, and he did, pulling over Remus’s chair and plopping down the food on Janus’s desk.

“You look stressed,” Emile commented.

Janus sighed, already reaching into the bag to look at what Emile had bought. “Everything’s disorganized, everything’s broken, and no one knows how to do anything.”

“Yeah,” Emile said. “I’ve noticed the TPI is understaffed. Even with all of the new recruits, there never seems to be enough people to go around.”

 “Yeah,” Janus said, pulling out a burger on a pretzel bun and going to unwrap it. “How about you? This all been messing up your job too?”

“In general, for the AMO, yes, because they have to get all of the new agents houses and everything. For my department, not as much, but we are seeing some agents getting stressed because they’re overworked. Mostly the more senior agents.”

“Honestly, I’m lucky stress makes me throw myself into work to avoid thinking about it. I shudder to think how all of the mentally healthy people are holding up.”

“Janus,” Emile scolded.

 “Plus, I’m already set up to have an appointment with a head doctor at least twice a week, so I’m good on that front.”

“I guess that’s true. Just don’t overwork yourself,” Emile said.

“I’m fine Emile. Plus, they need me. I seem to be one of the few people around here who actually know what they’re doing.”

“I just worry…” he said.

“I can handle it well enough,” Janus promised. “I’ve got the toolkit or whatever the head doctor calls it. Plus… work wasn’t ever actually the problem.”

“I know. I know…Just…you aren’t even taking lunch.”

“I have a bit more time free in the afternoon,” Janus said.

 “I was just in the middle of something today. If you’re free for a half hour or something, we could get a cup of coffee. How about that? Would that assuage your worry about me a least a bit?”

“Yeah,” Emile said. “Yeah, it would a bit. I have a break at 2, would that work?”

“Sure,” Janus said. He technically had a good amount of stuff to do, but Emile was right in the end. He should try to take breaks. It wasn’t his duty to do everything at the TPI. “A quick lunch now and coffee at 2.”

 Chapter 59

Janus did fulfil his promise to Emile to take a short coffee break at 2pm. It was nice for both of them, Janus thought and was well worth it… even when he came back to a stack of work and an extra mission on his docket.

“Where did this one even coming from?!” Janus asked as he and Remus speed walked to costuming. “I was gone for less than 30 minutes. They can’t give us more than an hour warning anymore?”

Remus shrugged. “I just got back from a mission,” he said. “I haven’t even had time to write my report on that one.

 “This is a mess,” Janus said. “Everything’s a mess.” Readings of a fairly large time distortion had popped up in 2158 Lille, France out of seemingly nowhere according to write up they’d been given. Though, honestly, with how disorganized the TPI has been, Janus wasn’t 100% confident they hadn’t just missed the thing somehow. It also was apparently giving very similar readings to the time device they’d ran into in Cuba. That’s why they were sending both Remus and Janus, despite the two of them mostly having been split up for missions in the past few weeks. If it was as bad as Cuba, they wanted them to have backup.

 Of course, that was where the TPI’s consideration had ended. Remus and Janus were still being rushed through to this mission and not even seeing Rhi once more. Costuming barely even glanced at them when they got there. They just tossed clothing at them and only gave them a superficial look over before sending them off to decon.

It was almost disorienting how quickly they ended up in a completely different time and place. Janus was lucky that he was used to traveling through time. He could easily slip into the right language and accent and knew how to walk in the shoes they gave him. He worried about other people though.

 They arrived, of course, a bit before the time distortion was meant to begin, especially knowing their devices might not work once whatever it was hit. They waited around on a bench near a small shopping area for a while.

“So,” Remus said. “How’ve you been?”

Janus glanced at him. “Better overall,” he said. “Shit’s fucked with the TPI right now though.”

“I know,” Remus said. “It’s been interfering with my many extracurricular activities.”

“You’re extracurricular activities?” Janus asked. “Do I even want to know?”

Remus show him a smile. “Probably not,” he said. “It’s just the usual: sex, drugs, alcohol, making sure Diesel Fuel has whatever she could ever want.”

 Yet, even as he said it, there was something else in his eyes that gave Janus pause. “Are you sure things are alright?” he asked. “I could help with something if you need.”

“With what time, Janus?” he asked, with a raised eyebrow.

“I could make time,” Janus said.

Remus just shook his head. “It’s nothing,” he claimed.

Janus wanted to press the issue, but then there was a buzz from both of their time pieces.

“Well,” Remus said, getting to his feet. “Duty calls.”

Strangely enough, despite giving off the same signals as the device from Cuba did, their time pieces did not shut off. The detected the time distortion like they were supposed to, but otherwise stayed active.

 It was… incredibly easy to use their time pieces to find the source of the time distortion. Apparently, the caution about it considering that it was similar to the Cuba incident was unfounded.

The tracked the distortion down to a small children’s playground in the middle of the city. There was a device attached to the bottom of one of the slides. Janus flipped it off and balance was restored to time.

“Weird,” Janus said. “It definitely does look like the device we found in Cuba, but…”

“We aren’t currently swimming in an ocean,” Remus filled in.

“Yes,” Janus said. “You’d think the same type of device would have the same effect, but this one was pretty stable.”

 “The main question is still who is putting them,” reminded Remus. “These are clearly not natural. Someone is doing this, but all we’re doing is running around trying to turn them all off instead of getting to the root of the problem.” The last bit was a frustrated mumble.

“You’re right,” Janus had to agree, “but so far these things have been practically untraceable. We can’t even figure out when they’re from. The most we can do is see when they’re active.”

“This doesn’t make any sense,” Remus said.

“No it-” Yet, before Janus could finish, he was cut off by a shout.

 “Janus,” Patton’s voice called from the opposite side of the playground. “Hi!”

“Uh…” Janus said as he approached. “Hi.” He probably shouldn’t be too shocked to see Patton hanging around time distortions. He’d shown up at many of them before, but something about him showing up after the time distortion was already fixed threw Janus off. “We already dealt with time distortion…”

“Oh, good!” Patton said. “That’s good.”

“Yea-”

“So, I was actually wondering something.”

“Er, alright,” Janus said. There was a pause. “What?”

“Oh,” Patton said. “Um. You. Well, you once mentioned that you liked ballet.”

He hadn’t actually that he could remember, but he wouldn’t be surprised if a future version of him had. “Yes,” he said. “That’s true.”

 “Yeah,” Patton said. “Cool, so I have a… nephew who’s been getting into ballet. And I’m trying to learn more about it. I was wondering if you had any suggestions for things to see about ballet to help me, er, get a better idea about how… it… is. You know?”

Before Janus could think of a response, Remus spoke up. “You were a much better flirt in Cuba,” he remarked idly. Janus elbowed him harshly in the side.

“Hey, Remus, honey,” Patton said, glancing at him with a sweet smile. “I saw an interesting looking coffee shop down the road.” He started digging in his pocket. “If I give you money, would you mind getting us all something to drink.” He pulled a few bills out of his pocket.

“Yeah… okay,” Remus said with a smirk. “I see how it is.”

Patton just smiled at him and handed over the money.

“Have fun you two,” Remus said, turning on his heels and striding off.

 Janus glanced back at Patton once he was gone. “So, a nephew?” Janus asked.

Patton nodded. “Yep!”

“What exactly did you want to know?”

“Erm… I dunno,” Patton said. “I don’t know enough about ballet to know what to ask about ballet.”

“Well do you want to know more about the watching side or the dancing side.”

Patton bit his lip. “Well, I guess I’d like to know more about the watching side first,” he said. “Then maybe learn some basics about the dancing stuff if my nephew wants to dance.”

“Well, I actually do know more about watching ballet than participating, so that’s good.”

 Patton ended up pulling him over to sit on the swings even though there was a perfectly good bench at the edge of the playground. Janus talked a bit about ballet in general and then gave him a list of particular shows he liked. He did try to stick to the 21st century and before under the assumption that this nephew was from the same time as Patton. There was still plenty of things to talk about even with those restraints.

Patton seemed interested as he talked, pressing his face against the chain of the swing to look at him as he talked with a smile.

 They spoke about ballet for about 20 minutes before Remus eventually returned from the coffee shop.

“Thanks Remus,” Patton said, taking the cup he’d offered to him.

“No problem,” Remus replied, flashing a smile.

“Well,” Patton said, “thank you for the info Janus, but I really need to be going now.”

“Oh,” Janus said. “Okay.”

“See you soon!” he said, typing something into his timepiece and immediately disappearing without even checking his surroundings. He was lucky the playground was strangely empty today. He left his drink on the ground without taking a sip.

“Well,” Janus sighed once he was gone. “We should probably be getting back to the TPI anyway,” he said, taking a sip of the drink Remus had gotten him.

 “A London Fog?” Janus asked.

“It was the special,” Remus said, taking a sip of his own drink.

Janus shrugged. “We’ll finish these and head back,” he said. “The mission was shorter than expected anyway. They can deal with us being gone a couple of extra minutes.”

“Mhmm.”

Janus took another sip. “About the conversation from early,” he said.

“Uh, could we maybe talk about it later?”

“Remus, you’re my friend and clearly something is bugging you.”

“It’s nothing,” Remus said. “Really.”

“It’s clearly not ‘nothing,’ Remus.”

“I… well,” Remus said. “Maybe not, but let’s not talk about it right now. We’re on a mission.”

Janus snorted. “Remus, I’ve seen you drink on the job.”

“…Right,” Remus said. “But still. Things are busy. We should probably actually head back now.”

Janus sighed. “You’re probably right,” he agreed, “but really, we should talk sometime.”

“Sometimes,” Remus agreed, “just… not now.”

“Fine,” Janus said. “Ready?” Remus nodded and Janus pulled up his timepiece and pushing the correct button to get them back to decon. Remus copied him and they both were off.

 Chapter 60

Remus pretty much bolted out of decon to get away from Janus when he tried to talk to him again or at least ask if he could come by and talk to him after work. Janus felt a pit of worry start to grow in his gut. There was something wrong, but Janus didn’t know what. In fact, thinking back, maybe there had been something wrong for a while, but Janus had been too caught up in his own shit of a brain to properly address it.

He walked back to his office still thinking about it. Maybe he’d get Emile’s opinion on what to do.

 The lights flickered as he entered the hallway his office was in, and he paused. That was strange. Very strange.

He frowned, planning to message someone right away about whatever the fuck that was. It was one thing to be a chaotic mess of a time travel agency; it was another to literally not be able to keep the lights on. What was going on in this place?

He stepped into his office shaking his head. To his surprise, someone was already sitting at his desk.

“Virgil?” Janus asked, confused. “What are you doing here?” It wasn’t completely unheard of for someone in cultural outreach to come physically to the TPI, but usually agents went to them. It was more convenient to them and a bit more secure for the TPI.

 “Oh,” Virgil said in a tone that made Janus narrow his eyes and expect the dish washer not to be loaded. “Hey Janus. What are you doing here?”

“In my office?” Janus asked, glancing at Fred who had obviously let him in. Fred shrugged. Glad to know they had great security here.

“Right, yeah,” Virgil said. “It would be your office, huh?”

“…Yes?”

Virgil paused for a split second and took a breath to regroup. “I was actually looking for your partner.”

“Remus?” Janus asked. “Why?” Then he paused. “What on Earth did he do?”

“Nothing,” Virgil said. “Well, I mean… probably something knowing him, but that’s not why I’m here.”

“Probably,” Janus agreed. “I don’t know where he is right now though. He ran off when we got back from our last mission.”

“And you have no idea where he could have gone?”

“I actually would like to talk to him too,” Janus said. “So, if I did, I wouldn’t be here.”

“Chances he’ll come back to the office?” Virgil asked, hopefully.

“Very low since he’s avoiding me.”

“Great,” Virgil said, rubbing his temples. “That’s great. Why does this have to be physically difficult as well?”

“What exactly do you need with Remus?” Janus asked, noting the way Virgil was holding himself very tensely.

 “I just need to talk to him,” Virgil said.

“Yes,” Janus said. “About…?”

Virgil didn’t say anything. He just looked off to the side.

“Why is everyone acting weird today?” Janus said, almost to himself.

“I’m not!” said Fred from his corner.

Janus shot him an unamused look. “Thank you for your contribution to this conversation, Fred.”

“Look,” Virgil said, “can you just tell him I need to talk to him about something private the next time you see him?”

“What on Earth do you need to talk privately to Remus about?” Janus said.

“Just leave it, Janus,” Virgil said.

 He had his lips downturned in stern way that meant he was trying to hide something from Janus by feigning annoyance. Janus titled his head. “You two aren’t…”

“No! Ew!” Virgil said, looking disgusted. “He’s somehow the worst of two options which is saying something considering the French Toast.”

“What?”

“Nothing,” said Virgil. “Just, can I leave a note for him, or something?”

Janus paused, looking at him. Virgil squirmed under his gaze but didn’t seem like he was going to give in anytime soon. “Fine,” Janus finally relented. “You can leave a note on his desk. I’m not sure why you didn’t just email him.”

 “It’s an in-person type of conversation,” Virgil said, wringing his hands.

“Whatever you say,” Janus said, walking over to Remus’s desk and clicking the memo button that brought up a screen people who weren’t Remus could write on. “There you go,” he said.

“Thanks,” Virgil said with a relieved grin, clearly happy he was no longer being interrogated. He grabbed the stylus tied to the side of Remus’s desk. (If Janus hadn’t tied it there, it would be in Mesopotamia by now, he was sure.)

Janus turned to go back to his own desk.

“Wait,” said Virgil. “It isn’t working.”

 “What do you mean?” Janus asked. “It’s a note app.”

“It’s not tracking what I write,” Virgil said. He tapped the screen with his finger. “It’s not even responding.”

Janus leaned over to take a look for himself. He tapped it a few times and there was nothing, so he tapped it a bit more aggressively. A fuzzy line went across the screen and then it shut off abruptly.

“What is wrong with things in this office lately?” Janus asked with a frown.

“My stuff just froze too,” Fred said.

The door opened then, and Lena entered the room. “The coffee makers are all offline.”

 “What do you mean the coffee makers are offline?” Janus asked.

“I went to get some coffee for Fred and I and they’re not working. Any of them.”

“That’s odd,” Fred said.

“You know,” Virgil said, shifting nervously on his feet. “This seems like a bad time for me to be here. Why don’t I just come back another time or better yet, Janus, just tell Remus to come find me.”

“Yeah,” Janus agreed. “There’s a lot of things going on apparently, so it’s probably best if you leave.”

With that, Virgil brought up the time device he was using and pushed a couple of buttons to return to his university.”

 However, instead of disappearing like he was meant to do, he flickered once and then was immediately on his knees with his hand over his nose.

“Shit,” Virgil hissed.

“Are you okay?” Janus asked, kneeling next to him. There was blood coming from his nose which was concerning, but his eyes focused on Janus easily enough, though he looked very startled.

“I think I just hit the shield.”

“Is your timepiece not approved?” asked Janus, pulling on his arm to see the timepiece.

“I got it approved this morning,” Virgil said, taking a tissue Fred handed to him to press it to his nose. “It’s supposed to have access to the TPI all day. I used it not even 10 minutes ago.”

Lena was already on her own time device. She pushed a button and disappeared for a moment before appearing a couple of steps away. She stumbled and was caught by Fred. “Mine’s blocked too,” she said, “I only put in to go to the entrance of the building.”

That’s when the lights went out.

 Chapter 61

There was screaming from somewhere down the hall.

“Do you think that’s like when kids would scream when the teacher would turn out the lights in elementary school for a movie?” Virgil asked hopefully, voice a bit nasally since he was still holding his nose.

Janus gave him a tightlipped stare.

“Yeah,” Virgil said, “that’s what I was afraid of.”

Fred calmly reached over and shut and locked the office door.

“And what good is that going to do?” asked Virgil.

Fred glanced at him, already moving to shove Remus’s desk in front of the door. Janus instantly went to help him. “Gives us time to regroup.”

 “Or it locks us in,” Virgil argued.

Janus glanced over at him. “Don’t panic,” he said.

“The fuck do you mean, don’t panic?” Virgil asked, panicking, “Do you even know me?”

Janus sighed. “Fine,” he said. “Panic as much as you want but do it quietly.”

Virgil opened his mouth to speak.

“We know what we’re doing. You do not. Contributions from you that are only fears no matter how rational are not helpful at the moment.”

Virgil shut his mouth.

Janus turned Lena and Fred. “Okay, what do we know?”

“Malfunctioning coffee makers,” Lena said. “Malfunctioning tech in general really.”

 “And not just now,” Fred added, now working on barricading the window with the cabinet he kept his hot chocolate in. “There’s been issues with the whole system for a while now, and they’ve been getting worse.”

“Right,” Janus said. “I’d been blaming that on new recruits messing things up out of ignorance or IT not having enough time do normal maintenance, but if everything is down when the shields are malfunctioning, that implies something else.”

“Are the shields even malfunctioning?” Lena asked. “That implies something went wrong with the program, but what happened to Professor Eran and I is what it’s supposed to do to people who don’t have permission to cross them.”

 “So, the shields might be malfunctioning,” Janus said, “or someone went in and changed the permissions.”

“Considering the tech problems we’ve been having,” Lena said, “it’s possible someone’s been playing around in the TPI the system without knowing what they’re doing.”

“Or maybe they know exactly what they’re doing,” Janus suggested, “and they wanted to see our usual protocol for small issues before giving us a big one.”

There were a few moments of silence where they all were lost in thought.

“People are still screaming,” Virgil pipped in.

“Yes,” Janus confirmed. “This is obviously not just a virtual attack.”

 “Which should be the priority?” Lena asked. “The virtual attack or the physical one?”

“The virtual part will be complicated, and if we stabilize the building physically, we’ll have more time and have everyone safe,” Fred said, “but on the other hand the virtual attack is obviously what’s letting the physical attack persist. If people had access to time travel and communication, the physical attack wouldn’t matter.”

“I think-” started Janus, but he was cut off suddenly by a horrible screeching noise like metal on metal. The room they were in jolted like they were in a car that suddenly stopped and then the world was turning sideways, and they were all toppling as the floor became the wall. Janus landed on top of Virgil. Hopefully the blood now staining his shirt was from the man’s already bloody nose. “-we should probably start with the time anomaly attack!”

 Lena was a few feet away from him. She’d luckily been to the right of her desk, so she landed on top of it instead of it landing on top of her. Fred was a couple of feet away, already crouched. Judging by the state of the furniture around him, he’d had to dodge the cabinet he’d been putting over the window.

“What’s going on?” Virgil asked. Good, he was conscious after that.

“Time distortion,” Janus answered.

“What the hell type of time distortion is this?!” Lena exclaimed, holding one of her arms with the other. Janus couldn’t tell what type of injury she’d gotten.

 “One like the one Remus and I ran into in Cuba,” Janus said.

“So…” Fred said.

“I think we’ve finally found whoever has been mucking up time with time distortion devices. Or, more, I think they’ve found us.”

There were more screams from down the hall. “We can still hear other people in the building screaming,” Janus noted. “That’s good.”

“How is that good?” Virgil asked.

“That means the building is still connected to itself,” Janus explained. “Which, means that while the shields are screwed up, they’re still in place and keeping the building from being ripped apart and sent through time and space.”

 “Oh well that’s good at least,” Virgil said, sounding honestly a bit hysterical. He looked over at Janus. “If the building is intact, can’t we just leave? Just through the front door?”

The three time agents in the room exchanged a look.

“Well,” Fred said, “first of all, it’s probably not going to be that easy to get to the front door considering the screaming we’re hearing every so often.”

“Also, we wouldn’t be able to get out if we did make it to the door.”

“What?” Virgil asked. “Why not?”

“It’s kind of a secret that most people don’t know unless they’ve worked here a long time,” Janus said, “but the TPI headquarters isn’t exactly… in a place.”

 “What do you mean it’s not in a place?” Virgil asked. “I’ve seen the outside of the building. It’s on a normal street with restaurants and a park and all of that.”

“It’s really not though,” Janus said.

“It’s kind of floating,” Lena cut in. “Somewhere in deep space. The doors auto-teleport you the doors of a building on Earth which is why you think that it’s there.”

“The building’s a shell?” Virgil asked, flabbergasted.

“Yes, and unfortunately, without time travel being accessible, going out of the front door would be ill advised.”

There was a long pause as Virgil seemed to reboot. “We’re floating in space right now?!”

“Well,” Janus said. “We were always floating in space. You just didn’t know that.”

 “Great, yeah, nice, that’s great,” Virgil said, rubbing his temples.

“So,” Janus said, turning to Fred and Lena. “I think first we need to find whatever is sending out time quakes before they get worse. Then, we’ll figure out the rest along the way.”

“How are we going to find it though?” Fred asked. “It could be anywhere.”

“I’m not sure but standing in here isn’t going to get us anywhere,” Lena said.

“The closer we get the more chaos there will be,” Janus said. “Game of hot and cold with time distortions anyone?”

Lena and Fred nodded, but Virgil just looked queasy. Luckily, when the room had gone sidewise, the door had landed in a place still accessible enough with a bit of crawling.

 Fred and Lena had to pull the desk away from the door, but then they were able to cautiously open it. Fred poked his head out. “Seems clear,” he said. “Sideways, but clear.”

“Good,” Janus said.

Fred started slowly crawling out into the hallway and Lena went after him. Janus turned back to a very green looking Virgil. “You can stay here,” he said. Maybe go in the supply closet to prevent any more injury from falling office supplies. It won’t be comfortable, but it’ll be better. We’ll come get you when things are stable.”

Virgil nodded. Yet, right as Janus turned away to go follow Fred and Lena, there was another rubble and the ground shook. Virgil, still a bit wobbly on his feet from the last couple of falls tumbled down, but luckily the room’s walls stayed in their places.

Unluckily, the walls outside of the room didn’t. Looking through the office door one could see what was outside the room was very much not a hallway anymore, but a different room entirely. There was no Lena or Fred in sight. “You’ve got to be kidding,” Janus said to the universe.

 Chapter 62

“I thought you said the building was stable!” Virgil said.

“I said it’s not being ripped apart,” Janus corrected, “and it still isn’t. We’re still inside the headquarters. The rooms just got a bit… scrambled.”

“Great, great, fuck.”

“It’s fine, Virgil,” Janus said, though he himself was a bit worried. He knew if he showed that, however, Virgil would just panic more, and the last thing Janus needed at the moment was a panicking civilian, let along a panicking Virgil.

“It is not fine,” Virgil said. Luckily, he looked a bit pissed off at Janus’s flippant reply. Good. A pissed off Virgil was better than one having a panic attack.

 Janus just rolled his eyes, making Virgil bristle even more. “Well,” he said, “either way, I need to attempt to find what is causing this time distortion. Come with me or stay here, though I am unsure if the closet is a closet anymore.”

Virgil eyed the closet and then eyed Janus.

“Make your choice quickly though,” Janus cautioned, already steeping towards the open doorway.

He heard Virgil curse after a moment and then a hand was gripping Janus’s arm. He was coming with then.

They both climbed out of the sideways doorway into the room on the other side.

 “Where are we?” Virgil asked, still holding onto Janus’s sleeve. It reminded Janus of welcome week in their freshman year of college.

They’d been randomly assigned as roommates in the dorms. Janus had mostly ignored him the first day after small attempts at making conversation had failed miserably. He’d assumed the boy simply didn’t want to make friends, and Janus had taken that in stride, sure he could make friends elsewhere.

That lasted until that night when he’d found his roommate on the bathroom floor, dry heaving into the toilet. After figuring out that it was from nerves and not some drug his body was trying to desperately expel (Janus had been very glad he didn’t have to drag some dumbass to the hospital on his first day living away from home), he decided to take pity on the poor fool and socially adopted him.

 He'd been a nervous wreck during all of Welcome Weekend even with Janus’s literally leading him by the hand (and sometimes dragging him) to the many social events the university put on. He’d slowly calmed down, however being around a lot of people still sometime freaked him out. He’d warmed up to Janus quickly though and when they were alone, he’d come out of his shell.

He’d proved himself to be a witty, smartass, bastard as soon as he got over his crippling social anxiety. He’d matched Janus perfectly, honestly, and had always been around to help with homework, especially reading and writing. He’d also known more about how to clean himself and his environment more than most college freshman even if sometimes his anxiety had prevented him from using that knowledge appropriately.

 He'd actually managed to stop Janus from making poisonous gas in their apartment by mixing cleaning fluids in their junior year.

Janus glanced around them trying to answer the question of where they were. It was a medium sized room, about the size of the living room in his house and was mostly baren except for a large hollowed out circular desk with one gap for people to be able to walk through. Under the desk was a long line of old school computer towers humming softly with only a few centimeters between them. There was a mess of cords all over the place, connecting to different parts of the computers and thrown over parts of the desk.

 “I’m not sure where we are,” Janus admitted. “This is a pretty archaic set up. I’m not sure what it’d be used for.”

Virgil stepped forward towards the desk with a curious tilt to his head. He bent down to study one of the computers for a few moments. He squinted. “It’s not an archaic set-up. Well,” he amended. “It is, but it’s intentionally an archaic set-up. The techs current, it’s just put in a shell that looks old for some reason.”

“That’s odd,” Janus said.

Virgil pushed a button on the side of one of the towers and the machine started rumbling louder, lighting up Virgil’s face in a soft blue light as it did.

 Virgil stood as the computer tower next to it lit up the same the next moment and the one next to it the moment after that until all of the computers were on. Only after that did the top of the desk light up, a full 3-D hologram lighting up with Virgil inside.

Janus stepped through the gap in the desk to stand inside the hologram too.

He was met with a lock screen, but more worrying.

“Oh no,” Janus said.

“What?” Virgil asked, glancing at him.

“The date,” Janus said.

The date behind the prompt for the password read almost 10 years in the future of the year they were supposed to be in.

 “So much for your shields,” Virgil grumbled.

“We really shouldn’t be here,” Janus said.

“Oh really?” Virgil said. “Thanks for your useful information, Mr. Time Agent. I thought likely stepping on our own personal time streams, especially by going to the future was a good Thursday afternoon activity.”

Janus glared at him.

“Oh wait,” said Virgil, glancing at the date on the screen, “I mean Sunday at 2am.”

“Does being an asshole help?” Janus asked.

“Would you prefer an actual mental breakdown because I have two modes of behavior open to me right now.”

“Asshole it is,” Janus grumbled.

“Great,” said Virgil. “Fuck you, fuck Remus, fuck time travel, and fuck…”

 And, of course, that’s when the room decided to tilt once more. They both went tumbling, but luckily the fall was softer this time. Janus simply landed on his backside as though he’d tripped backwards while walking. Meanwhile, Virgil ended up on his hands and knees having caught himself.

“Fuck this!” Virgil completed his sentence a bit too loudly for Janus’s taste.

“Shh,” Janus said.

Virgil looked up at him and seemed to realize what Janus had. They were no longer in the room they’d just been in. Or perhaps they were in the same room, but the computer wasn’t there, and the lighting was different. It was rather difficult to tell if they’d moved rooms since it was just a rectangular box of a room.

 Instead, they were in what seemed to be just an office, much like Janus’s office, but with six desks instead of four. There was a half-eaten lunch on one of the desks and a hologram with a mission report pulled up on the wall.

There also blood on the floor next to where they had landed.

“Where are we?” Virgil asked in a whisper.

“Back in action,” Janus said. “It’s one of the offices, but I don’t know which at the moment, but I’m going to go ahead and assume it’s in the right time. The shields must have righted us.

 “That’s good,” Virgil said, then paused as there was a crashing sound from the hallway. He looked wide eyed at Janus. “Or not good.”

Janus put his finger to his lips and slowly got to his feet. The door had been left open but only slightly. He walked over to it on silent feet to peer through the gap.

The first thing he saw was a body. It wasn’t moving, so it was likely the person was dead, but they could also be unconscious. They were face first on the floor, so Janus didn’t know if he knew them. Their torso was in front of the door, blocking them in.

 The second thing Janus noticed was the giant creature stalking through the hallway. It looked sort of like a big cat that stood on its hind legs. It looked like it was probably 8 feet tall when erect, but it was about Janus’s height with how it hunched over.

Ah.

Janus went to step back from the door, but before he could, the creature looked over at him.

They met eyes.

Whatever it was clearly was not here to have a conversation. He could see it in its eyes… even without the blood on its mouth.

Janus slammed the door.

“What?” Virgil asked.

  “You don’t want to know,” Janus said, pressing his back against the door. There was a loud thunk as something slammed against the other side.

“What is that?!” Virgil asked, alarmed.

“Just pray the rooms decide to get shuffled soon.”

A clawed arm broke through the door right next to Janus’s head. Janus cursed and jumped away from the door. He grabbed Virgil and pulled him behind a desk.

“This isn’t going to protect us!” Virgil said. “We need to get out of here.”

“I’m currently sourcing for ideas,” Janus spat back. He reached up to dig through the desk drawer.

 All he found was a tablet and a half-squished energy bar. At least he could throw the tablet at the cat creature. He wasn’t sure that would do much good considering it was currently shredding the door with its monstrous claws.

“I have one,” Virgil said.

Janus glanced at him to see him staring at his own hand. “Wh-”

“Give me 5 seconds,” Virgil said, holding up a finger. He then made an odd motion with his hands. Two fingers of one hand rubbed around a finger of the other. It looked like he was turning a dial or spinning a ring on his finger, but nothing was there.

 He suddenly disappeared with a pop.

Janus blinked at the empty space he’d left for a couple of seconds before he heard the door splintering behind him as the cat finally broke into the room.

He did throw the tablet at it and it glanced off it’s head as expected. Luckily, before it could come and eat him alive for that slight, there was another pop. Patton appeared in front of him.

“Need a lift?” he asked.

He didn’t wait for an answer. He just grabbed Janus by the shoulder and Janus felt the familiar sensation of traveling through time.

[elius-learns-to-write]

The one where being clumsy helps

Hey besties enjoy this :) Also the story about getting scared by a pigeon and smashing into a glass door was something I have actually done but the only difference was that I knocked myself out :)

The one where being clumsy came in handy 

If there was one thing you could do it was managing to trip over your own feet 

Seriously no one could make a trip to the kitchen look so dangerous 

As much as it made the team worry it was bloody funny

Bang. Thud. Smash. “Ouch” you groaned from your newfound place on the cold tiles of the tower's kitchen, rubbing the now throbbing lump that had started to form on your head “Y/n are you okay?” Bucky called from the couch, pausing his game of UNO with Sam to check on you. “Yep…. dine… I mean fine….. Yep, I’m all Groot… Good….. Damn it” you stuttered as you tried to stand up. The floor swaying beneath your feet “are you sure you look like you’re going to throw up?” Sam wheezed, doubling over because obviously there was just nothing funnier than you nearly dying on the way to grab a glass of water. “I might throw up all over you in a minute if you don’t stop laughing” you glared as the man continued to laugh at you “don’t worry y/n the CCTV will catch that too” Bucky added with a chuckle walking over to you and pulling you into a hug. “Damn it” you muttered as the men made sure to get you back to your room in one piece

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What have I told you about running around outside when it’s dark” Steve scolded as he patched up the cut on your forehead “to not do it” you replied as you cast your head to the floor in shame “but in my defense, the pigeon looked really scary and I didn’t know that Bruce had shut the glass door because if I had known I wouldn’t have tried to run into it” you smiled before hissing as the sanitizing wipe came into contact with your skin. “Well I would hope so” he muttered in concentration, trying to place the plaster in the right place “there all done, now go and convince Tony not to play that video at the next movie night,” he said, starting to put the first aid kit back in its place watching as you skipped out of the bathroom and into the bright light of the hallway.

It made for great entertainment for the avengers and great humiliation to you

But there was one clip he refused to show 

It painted your lack of coordination way to well

You ran through the lab, up the stairs, into the hallway, and into a cupboard. And all without tripping up, you were on a role. However, now wasn’t the time to be thinking about how excellently you managed to do that. You see somehow someone ha damaged to break into the tower and with you being the only one who wasn’t trapped in the training room it was up to you to try and find whoever had got it. But the cupboard just looked a lot nicer than possibly getting shot.

“We’re doomed” spoke Tony as he watched your figure retreat into the cupboard, all you had to do was get into the front room and press the button to let them all out so they could do the finding, but by the looks of it, you weren’t too keen on that idea. “Maybe they’re just coming up with a plan Stark, don’t doubt their ability to do this” remarked Nat, who was sitting on what was meant to be a treadmill but was making a very comfortable seat.

Meanwhile, you were actually in the cupboard trying not to poke your eye out with a broom “okay think y/n, they’re in the lounge so if you distract them enough then maybe you can press the button and run like the wind in the other direction? Yeah okay I can do that.” hand slowly grabbing the handle and twisting it as quietly as it possibly was for a door that hadn’t been oiled in about a year, and dashing for the back of the island where you would be able to find out the intruders exact position. Sliding all over the place as you made your way into your established lookout spot you waited.

“They look like Bambi on ice out there” Sam spoke from the floor, arms folded across his chest, clearly displaying his dislike for the whole situation “Yes but at least it looks like they have a plan now” added Bruce, more worried about not going green than you looking like someone had turned the floor into a lake in the winter. “I am going to say it again. We are doomed” Tony muttered.

You could hear the man muttering about how quiet it was for a place that held the world's heroes as your eyes scouted the room in front of you for the button and your brain tried to formulate a way to get there. You ended up settling on just throwing a spoon at him, screaming, and then just making a run for it and hoping he didn’t have a gun. Swoosh, the spoon flew from your hands and hit the man in the back. “What the fuck was I thinking” you whisper screamed as you started to push off and run. “AHHHHHHHHHHH TAKE MY SPOON OF WRATH YOU PIECE OF SHIT”, time seemed to slow down as your foot got caught on the side of the couch and you toppled onto the man, catching the both of you by surprise, so you did the only thing that seemed reasonable in your adrenaline-fueled brain. Punch, kick and scream. “Y/N IT’S ME AHHHH STOP HITTING ME, IT’S PETER” the boy? Screamed. your fists slowly stopped and you tilted your head in confusion “Peter?”

What had happened was Peter had forgotten his pass and had decided that instead of waiting for Tony to come down and let him in, he’d get Karen to break-in 

Which had turned on lockdown mode in the tower

Which had left you all alone 

And when I said you ran through the lab I meant you literally smashed your way through the door 

But you tripping up and toppling onto him had meat that he didn’t get his ass kicked by the avengers 

Tony still wouldn’t show the video though

Maybe being clumsy would come in handy again 

Probably not

[livlepretre]

Hey, just wanted to thank you for recommending Caraval! It only took me a few days to read it and I loved it more than I thought I could!

Just because I'm curious.. who are your favorite characters? And ships? I personally shipped Legend with Scarlett, I was disappointed that they didn't happen.🥲✨

(Not me always falling for impossible ships, just why💀)

Omg you are luring me out of hiding with this caraval ask hahaha

I’m so happy you adored the series— I too was caught off guard by just how much I loved it.

My favorites… gosh, I think a big reason why I love the series so much is that the characters give me those warm fuzzy “oh yes, these are my friends” feelings— I overall really like all of the mains, but the Dragna sisters are at the heart of it for me— getting to alternate between their povs in the last book was heaven for me. Their love for each other was so wonderfully depicted and completely convinced me, and they were so different and yet so obviously sisters. But honestly I also adore Julian, I find him completely hilarious. Also???? I would describe most of the characters as bastards (Gavriel, LEGEND), devils (Tella and Julian, Paloma), or weird fuckos (WHAT is Jacks’s energy, please tell me, because it is distinct but weird as hell omg) but Scarlett is somehow actually just a ray of beautiful rainbow sunshine and I appreciate it so much.

As for ships!! Okay I COMPLETELY feel you on Scarlett x Legend— I was convinced of it throughout the first book (HE ONLY WRITES BACK ONCE SHE TELLS HIM SHE’S GETTING MARRIED) and was honestly disappointed when it turned out at the end of the first book that Tella x Legend was happening all along. (I think I thought the letter at the end from “a friend” was from Legend. Oh what an innocent fool I was.) BUT, WOW did I come around on Julian x Scarlett. Like, I also spent a while in the first book convinced Julian had to be Legend simply because the chemistry was so good between them and I was so into it and Julian is just off putting enough. And everything happening with him in the 2nd book cements this for me. (I like complicated and messy things, and details like him knowing Armando was playing the game all along and deciding to hide it because he won’t play fair since he wants to win was 10/10 for me.) Also he is so dashing? Of course he runs in to that doomed immortal after party to go save her if he possibly can.

Now. The Big Question. Legend or Jacks with Tella. This messed with my mind soooo much. Like, I am into Legend. I am into the fact that he apparently died like a halfway through Caraval (oops haha) but also the fact that he just can’t love her?? the scene at the immortal market when he’s like, who is the father of her child??? THE SCENE WHERE HE SAVES HER FROM THE CARD?????? GAH. Love it and love their dynamic. All of the dreaminess of like the first 10 chapters of Finale. The creepiness mixed in with the wonder. But. But!!! Jacks!!! Look, his energy is off the charts feral and WEIRD but I am a SUCKER for this sort of ship. The elements of fate and horror and!!! And!!! Oh, his love for her is destroying him? Oh, he cursed her and she’s dying? Oh, she’s his one true love but she doesn’t really return his sentiments but has a strange connection to him and keeps going back? OH, THEY ARE MARRIED BECAUSE HE TRICKED HER INTO AN ARCANE AND TERRIFYING SOUL BINDING RITUAL???? I am bitterly disappointed that this ended so abruptly— I want more! I wanted AT LEAST a denouement after she is freed from his spell— or something! And wow that divorce was way too easy. I thought there were supposed to be terribly permanent effects? Like, I was too agonized over this ship to read the Jacks sequel novels right away (Once Upon a Broken Heart if you are not aware of it yet, and Happily Never After coming out soon!) because I was afraid he would get a new girlfriend/I didn’t want to move on from the Dragna sisters as the main heroines yet, but I am inching closer.

[ta-da-the-sequel]

The Lady of the Wastes

(A post-apocalyptic future au where Estyia and Emir meet under different circumstances)

Day 2: Different Era

—

It's just a bet, his friends said. Whoever got the most game would get first picks. But neither Emir nor his friends gambled on a hindterbeast showing up.

And so he found himself alone, doing the one thing he could against these suckers: run. He leaped over rocks and through golden grass, trying to throw it off with abrupt turns.

If he could just turn hard enough, it would flip on its back and struggle to get up. But as it is he could sense the creature gaining on him. In fact, he could smell the thing, a putrid stench reminiscent of death.

He continued moving forward, not wanting to know how close he was to his doom. "Here goes." He steadied himself, taking a sharp turn perpendicular to the nearby steam.

The ground crashed as the creature followed suit, toppling onto its back. Emir pumped his fist in earnest. "Yes!" One sneaky glance revealed all, the beast flailing its six stupid legs around.

Once he was full sure that the beast was out of sight, he took another turn towards home. He hoped his friends were all okay. About an half hour ago, the group were all celebrating Plonkath's double kill. Now they all hoped for Emir's safe return.

The ground rumbled a bit. "What now?" He rolled his eyes. Was it an earthquake? Flyfish? Another hindterbeast? Emir caught his foot on the root of a blackwood, stumbling onto the dry grass. In his peripheral vision he noticed something scurrying towards him.

"Well, shit." The beast returned, more eager than ever, and Emir dashed even with the aches of exhaustion. If this was to be his grisly end, then he could only wish his family well.

The ground shuddered harder now. He chucked water from another stream in its face, hoping he'd meet a quick end—

Bam. He got a tall boot to the face, and the shrill sound of the creature screeching. Way above him he could see it writhing in his saviour's hand, which glowed with immense heat.

"Silly creature, thinking you could escape being dinner." The woman stabbed a two-pronged trident longer than Emir was tall into it. At long last, the screeching stopped.

Emir looked up at her in shock. "Wait, hold on, you eat those things?"

"Oh yes, didn't you know, they're absolutely delicious." She said it with such enthusiasm that Emir couldn't help but be concerned. After all, those same teeth in her pearly smile could grind him with ease. "Personally I find them best smoked."

It took her a moment to notice the fact there was a human standing next to her, of whom took a couple steps back as if to leave. "Look, lady, I appreciate you saving me back there, but I ought to get going."

She made a sound as if disappointed, and she brought her head around to face him properly. "So you're the human this beast was after. Are you sure you want to go alone, it's getting dark rather fast."

He found the lady's face a bit too big to comprehend all at once. Between her sharp but delicate features, her stunning emerald eyes and long, flowing blonde hair that couldn't be restrained, she was easily one of the most beautiful women he'd ever seen. Something within him told him not to reject her offer.

But then he thought of his friends, his family. What would they think if he came back with a giant in tow?

"I, uh- I mean, it's a good offer and all but I—"

"Ah, come on." She frowned, offering a hand to him. "May I offer you a ride?"

Heat rose to his cheeks. Why was she going so quick with this? "I'd rather walk, sorry."

If she seemed disappointed he didn't know, she did a fair job of hiding it. "Suit yourself."

He watched as she rose to her full height, looming over him with that creature slung over her shoulder. "Come along then, follow me."

He looked to his left, just as she turned right. Surely she just didn't know? "Uh, sorry, my home's actually that way."

She continued regardless. "I didn't say anything about going to your home, specifically. Call me selfish, but I don't want to be travelling in the dark if I can help it. And I'm sure you don't either."

Emir's mouth resembled a fish. If she had genuine intentions, why does she have to be so sneaky about it? "I'm not bound to you, you know. I can easily just turn the other way and leave."

To his dismay she chuckled at him, as if to a silly child. "So why is it you haven't left yet?"

The question stung him hard. Now that she mentioned it, he's still here, beside her, craning his neck to look up at a lady many times his size. Yes, he did keep his distance from her, partly because of the reverberations, and because she was a giant he just met. She could be planning something horrible for all he knew.

And yet he's still here. "Just who are you anyway?"

Her eyes widened, and Emir wondered if he finally got to her. It seemed to him she was more focused on her desires than she was on him.

"Estyia."

Quite fitting if he's being honest. "Estyia, hm? I think it's a beautiful name. It reminds me of someone, actually."

She slowed her pace further, and he could see the look of fondness on her face. Who knew he could charm her like that? "Aw, you're too kind. And who is it that I remind you of?"

Before he continued, Estyia asked about his own.

"Anyway, you remind me of a woman of the same name. As someone who also fends off dastardly beasts, she's a great inspiration to me. During my childhood I'd often hear of the legends about her and everyday I wish I could be even half as good as her."

Up ahead, torches and a bonfire broke up the impending nightfall. At this point, he gulped. This settlement could only mean one thing: more giants. Lovely.

Meanwhile, he could see her smiling again, and despite his apprehension, he thought her smile to be rather alluring. "Yeah, I think I know of her too."

Thoughts fluttered around his head, and his face flashed in a mix of shock and concern. "Wait a minute... are you THAT Estyia?!"

No, no way. The Lady of the Wastes was but a myth. There should be no way—

The Estyia before him started laughing, a full-blown laugh he could feel in her footsteps. "You are a smart one, Emir, good on you for figuring it out–"

He stopped in his tracks. This wasn't real, it couldn't be. All his life he looked up to her in awe, only for him to be literally doing that at this moment.

"This has to be a dream, right? I cannot believe I'm meeting the real Estyia— I mean, you, in the flesh. There's no way, there's no way—"

His throat seized up with emotion, eyes wide in astonishment. If he left at the start, would he have ever realised? For all he knew he may have cursed himself later over the regret.

She brought herself to her knees, kneeling down until she was just above him. She'd seen people admire her before, but this... it hit different. "Might this be enough proof?" With her upper lip, she gave him a peck on the forehead.

Emir grased a hand over where she kissed him. "Oh, plenty."

[weia-yo]

hey it's undertale theory time!

this is heavily thanks to @drundertalescum for giving me brain food with the idea that when toriel mentions how asgore could've crossed the barrier with one soul she wasn't talking about the first of the 6 humans he killed, she was talking about Chara. here's the massive stream of thought that came from that.

what this theory centers around is actually not specifically that, but a question i've had for the 5 years i've been in this fandom, which is Why asgore and toriel decided to have asriel when they did? as we all know boss monsters only age when they have a child, so asgore and toriel having asriel meant that they were going to die sometime after asriel grew up. but why Then? why 1000-ish years after monsters were sealed underground and not any point before or after?

(part 1: the prophecy)

what we know is that at the time the monsters all lived in Home aka what's now the Ruins, sealed behind a door that can't be opened from the outside. this was to protect themselves from any possible human who decided to cross the barrier and kill them all. we also know about the deltarune prophecy, that the Angel, the one who has seen the surface, will make the underground go empty. we Also only know of three monsters who were mentioned to have seen the surface; asgore, toriel, and gerson.

And Another Thing, gerson mentions that lately people have started seeing the prophecy as being about an angel of death who will kill them all. but the thing is, the dude's Old. he's literally older than monsterkind's time underground. "Lately" to him could very easily be within the last few hundred years.

what i'm getting at is, i think the belief was that asgore, toriel, or gerson (or all three) were going to be the angel who would free them, but sometime during their stay in the ruins that belief shifted to the angel being a human who would go into the ruins and kill them all.

what i think happened was, gerson began to age. he's not immortal like asgore and toriel, he wouldn't live forever. i imagine when that realization hit asgore and toriel they had a long talk about the future. if the angel really was about a human who would kill them all, then asgore and toriel staying alive on the basis that maybe they were the angel who would free monsters was just giving them false hope.

they weren't going to do anything drastic, but taking away their own immortality, while giving monsterkind a new ruler without any expectation of freeing them, would mark a new era. for almost a thousand years they had hope that they would be free, but maybe it was better to just accept that this is their permanent home now and make the best of it. yes the prophecy likely said a human was going to kill them all but humans had left them alone for all this time and possibly forgotten all about them, they were behind a door that couldn't even be opened from the outside, staying in Home meant they were safe from humanity.

and then chara fell and everything went upside down.

(part 2: One Soul)

people have theorized that chara and asriel's friendship is the entire reason monsters lost their fear, left the ruins and went to live in the rest of the underground in the first place and i think that's most likely true, but what if before then asgore and toriel had a discussion? after all chara was a child but so was asriel, so was every child living underground, doomed to die without ever seeing the sun. chara was a human with a human soul. would killing chara be worth a chance at freedom?

we don't know if they had that conversation but we know the result; Absolutely Not. it's not worth it. it's not worth it to kill an innocent child for their freedom.

but i think they still saw within chara a chance for monsterkind to live on the surface. after all, toriel and asgore were aging, and when they died their soul would remain long enough for a human to take it and leave the barrier. i think they were hoping this would allow for chara to leave and find souls outside to bring back and break the barrier while a now fully-grown asriel would be able to lead the monsters on the surface to coexist with humanity, using his friendship with chara as an example to all.

of course this didn't end up happening because everything went wrong. monsterkind's hopes for freedom and an era of peace on the surface were all dashed, the prince of monsters was killed by the humans of chara's village, all the wounds from the monster-human war that were thought healed were torn open.

both asgore and toriel were understandably traumatized by this and both their reactions were completely understandable; asgore saw this as evidence that peace with humans was impossible and declared war, toriel saw asgore and monsterkind turning their backs on her children's legacy and decided to leave them behind. but it's what happened afterwards where i think they lost their way.

asgore lost his way because he decided to give monsterkind false hope. you walk through the underground and hear monsters talking about their lives; they're not happy. there are so many problems in the underground and it seems like few people are working to fix them; any time the problems are brought up they're either laughed off or amended with a "but it's ok because soon we will be free".

toriel also lost her way, by looking at the scenario where the humans went to asgore and fought him, which could only end in either of them dying, and choosing to not intervene.

the pacifist ending results in, among other things, toriel realizing (likely after facing frisk and finding their determination to not kill her) that she was wrong and that she couldn't let this fight happen.

i used to think this bit of the game was the one part i disliked, bc it didn't make sense for me for toriel to lecture asgore for not taking the first soul that dropped, but it never occurred to me until drundertalescum pointed it out that she very likely was talking about Chara.

toriel came here after realizing it wasn't worth it to let asgore die even if it meant the human could go free. and she reminds asgore what he seemed to have forgot, that it wasn't worth sacrificing anyone for their freedom. it wasn't worth it when the child in question was chara, it's not worth it when the child in question is frisk. and it's especially not worth it when asgore clearly doesn't want to hurt anyone, when he doesn't really want freedom, and is only doing this for a thin veneer of hope for monsterkind.

and asgore, who in the neutral run decides it would be better for him to die and for the human to take his soul, realizes that she's right. that it wasn't right to sacrifice anyone for their freedom, that it wasn't right to keep monsters barely going with this empty tragic "hope", and that it wasn't right to give up his own life even if it meant freeing frisk and through them potentially monsterkind as well.

[julemmaes]

Honey - part one

Elide Lochan x Lorcan Salvaterre roommates au

A/N: today I found a list of prompts that I just l o v e d and I decided to write an Elorcan short story cause I really really love them and I just don’t write them enough, so please enjoy this fluff turned mild angst and then again fluff I guess.

masterlist

Word count: 3,073

Elide would have loved to sleep. To be able to put on the soft plaid pyjamas that Lysandra had given her for her birthday only a few days before and slip under the warm covers - the General Psychology paper sitting in front of her as that black dash at the end of the sentence flashed was her only enemy at that moment.

She huffed, closing her eyes for a moment, enjoying the soft music coming out of the computer. She didn't know the song, because the playlist she was listening to had been sent to her by Lorcan and she hadn't had time to scroll through the song titles to memorize the ones she liked best. She couldn't even hear the words, just the soothing melody, but she could guess that it was a love song.

After all, every playlist Lorcan made for her to study with consisted mainly of sappy, romantic songs. Quite the opposite from what Lorcan himself represented, with his trademark grumpy, pissed-off attitude.

She giggled wearily, sliding even lower into the pillows as she thought about what their friends would say if they found out that her roommate looked for chill, love songs in his spare time just to help her out.

Elide never had too much time on her hands, always busy between university and the two jobs she worked to support herself, and when she could actually relax she never thought about finding new music, it was far too much work and tiring. But Lorcan wasn't studying and the shifts at the toy shop or the animal shelter were very often lonely and quiet, so he had time to listen to music for hours on end without anyone interrupting him. Only later, when he would have free time and nothing to do but play video games with Aelin and Rowan, would he get on the computer and create yet another playlist with the songs he thought she would like the most.

She was about to fall asleep when she heard Lorcan's scream and several alarms going off all over the neighborhood.

"No, fuck!"

She snapped her eyes open as she sat up and was surprised to find the room shrouded in darkness, the only source of light coming from her computer. She frowned, reaching for the switch and trying to turn the light on and off. Nothing.

She closed her eyes again, banging her head against the headboard.

This was the third blackout in a week. She couldn't take any more. And she could only hope that the alarms would all be turned off within the hour, because the last time, the building next door had taken over three hours to turn off the last one, causing everyone to lose hours of sleep in the middle of the night. She was just waiting for the dogs' barking to start as well.

Her plan to go to sleep early dissolved like candyfloss in water.

"Lorcan? Everything okay?" she said loud enough for the boy to hear. When no answer came she shook her head, huffing.

Elide looked for the phone among the blankets so she could turn on the torch, but she couldn't find it anywhere. She placed the computer on the floor, getting out of bed and paying attention to where she put her feet, "Where the fuck did I leave it?" she muttered to herself, moving the stuff she had on her desk over to the chair. It wasn't even there. She looked down at the bed again and then touched the pockets of the jeans she'd promised herself she wouldn't take off until she was done studying - nada.

She was about to leave the room when the door jerked open, "Ellie?" the computer screen was pointing too low for it to give enough light for Lorcan to see her, "Are you asleep?"

"Nop," she said from across the room, "I can't find my phone."

Lorcan sighed, "Mine's dead."

"Shit." she cursed, she wasn't a fan of the dark, "Do you remember where we put the candles last time?" she asked walking tentatively towards the doorway.

Suddenly, the music stopped and the computer made the worst sound it could have made at that moment, shutting down for good. She didn't worry about the paper that she had to finish, she knew it would be there once she turned it back on.

"I can't believe it," Lorcan muttered. They were plunged into darkness. "Can you make it over here without killing yourself?"

Elide was trying not to panic. She knew there was nothing in the dark, but that stupid childish fear had never really left her and her heart was beating wildly in her chest. It wasn't anything crippling, but it certainly wasn't a pleasant feeling.

She nodded, realizing then that Lorcan couldn't see her, "Yeah, wait."

"Take my hand."

Elide walked with her arms outstretched forward, moving them to avoid hitting the wardrobe or dresser she kept near the door, but her strategy didn't seem to work as she slammed her side into the latter and knocked half the stuff on it to the floor.

She grunted in pain, bringing both hands to the sore spot, "For fuck's sake."

She heard Lorcan chuckle, "What did you hit?"

"I think the dresser," she whined, then raised her head, as if she could see him, "Where are you?"

He snorted, "I'll try to get there. Stay right where you are."

"Where do you want me to go." Elide frowned, speaking so softly that even she struggled to hear herself over all those alarms. Another chuckle was soon broken by a growl of pain, followed by a series of very colourful swear words that made the girl burst out laughing.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," continued Lorcan, who, by the sound of the various thumps, was probably hopping on one foot, "I think I stepped on one of your stupid earrings."

"Oh, god," Elide wheezed, more out of exasperation than anything else, "pray you didn't break it because I might kill you."

"It's already taken care of that. We'd only be even if I broke it," he said, cursing as he put his foot back on the ground, "Just stand there and I'll try to pick everything up."

Elide couldn't keep the smile off her lips, "I'll help you."

They hadn't realised how close they actually were, because the second she lowered herself to kneel on the ground, her head slammed into something very hard. She grunted in pain again, bringing her hands to her forehead, but burst out laughing soon after. The situation was getting ridiculous.

"Christ, Elide, are you alright? Please tell me that wasn't your head." asked Lorcan immediately, stretching his hands forward.

Elide didn't know what he had wanted to do, probably make sure her head was still in one piece, but what his hands touched certainly wasn't her head. The laughter died in her throat with a broken sound and before Lorcan realised he was palming her, several moments passed. When he too seemed to come to realisation, he let out a squeak and immediately moved his hands away.

Lorcan squeaked.

"Did you just touch my tits?" asked Elide in a whisper. At the sound Lorcan made, Elide's entire body was covered in shivers.

He cleared his throat, "Sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay." she grinned. Elide managed to sympathize with the darkness in that moment, almost thanking it for hiding what was sure to be the reddest face Lorcan would ever see.

"Are you okay?" he asked her again, "Sorry I didn't mean to knee you in the forehead."

"I think I might have a concussion," she said, deciding to fuck with him.

"Ha ha," he huffed, "very funny."

Elide imagined him frowning more and more, then sighed, "Okay come on, let's go find these damn candles." she pulled herself upright, one hand on her head and the other on her hip, then muttered, "And tomorrow we're going to go buy a supply of electric torches."

She heard him chuckle, "Can you follow me or do I have to hold your hand?"

Without a second thought, she reached out a hand towards where she thought his would be. Only her fingers didn't meet bare skin, but the fabric of Lorcan's sweatpants, who with a surprised yelp took a few steps backwards, "What's that? Are you trying to even the score?" he said amused.

"Please tell me it was anything but your-" the words died in her mouth. She would have rather died and groaned, bringing her hands to her face when he burst out laughing.

"If you wanted to touch all you had to do was ask, babe," he teased.

"Fuck, knock it off," she said throwing a hand forward, at a safe height, and hitting him in the chest with her fist.

He grunted, but grabbed her wrist, finally intertwining his fingers with hers, "Was that so hard?"

She said nothing, but dug her nails into his flesh and that was enough.

She dragged her feet on the floor so she wouldn't risk sticking earrings or anything else in the soles of her feet and when they were finally in the hallway, she didn't worry about where to walk because she was simply following Lorcan. The warmth of his hand clasped in hers was reassuring her greatly.

"How long do you think this will last?" she asked once they reached the kitchen.

"I honestly have no idea," he said. Elide heard the light switch being turned on and then a faint, "Ah, yeah." coming from him.

She giggled, then brought her hand to her mouth as she yawned, "I just wish I could sleep."

"Rough day?" asked Lorcan, opening the hand that was gripping hers. It took her a while to realize that he was silently asking her to let him go. She felt herself flush again for not realizing it right away, and with deep chagrin she pulled her fingers away one by one, immediately missing him.

She nodded, flinching when one of the alarms changed pace, becoming louder and more insistent. She sighed, knowing they were doomed to at least another hour like that, "Classes this morning were boring as hell, but they were important so I spent six hours on books and there was no one at the café this afternoon, which means not getting too tired and not running after every order, but it also means-"

"-no tips. Yes, I know," Lorcan finished for her. She could feel him opening drawers and rummaging through items looking for anything candle-shaped.

"Your day?" she asked, yawning once more.

She heard Lorcan halt, "God, you're exhausted." she didn't answer, so he continued, "Nothing much. They came to adopt one of the newcomers this afternoon though, and I'm pretty positive that family is perfect for that pup."

Elide could hear the smile in his voice.

Lorcan might have seemed like a mean person on the surface, callous. And indeed he was a bit of a jerk if you weren't one of the people he 'put up with', as he always said, but anyone who really knew him could confirm that he was one of the most loyal and trustworthy people ever.

The fact that he worked at an animal shelter and cared about the families to whom the puppies were entrusted or at a toy shop where Elide had often seen him help multiple parents choose the perfect gift were just two of the examples that could be given to prove such a point.

"Good," she murmured.

"Ro's going to kill me," he complained, "We were playing against a bunch of kids online and now they're going to think I quit because we suck."

Elide grinned, "But you guys do suck."

The shuffling sound stopped again, "Say that again. I dare you."

She chuckled, moving a chair and sitting down. She yawned for the third time and furrowed her brow. She didn't like yawning.

"Ellie, what the fuck," Lorcan huffed in disbelief, "help me instead of just sitting there."

She groaned, "You kneed me and I'm dead tired, I have every right to do nothing," she justified herself, "Besides, the light will be back on in a few minutes. Chill out."

"Chill out." he mimicked her voice. Then he cheered, making her gasp, "Found it!"

"Good luck finding the lighter." she whispered, crossing her arms over the table and resting her head on them.

He whistled, "How nice we are tonight," then he closed the drawers slamming them shut one by one and Elide wanted to punch him again for all the noise, "But it doesn't touch me, because it's in my pocket." and then a flame lit up the room just enough for Elide to see his face.

She scowled, "Why do you have a lighter in your pocket?"

The victorious, sly expression Lorcan had had fell away so quickly that for a second Elide thought something had happened or he'd been burned.

She was almost afraid to ask, "Have you started smoking again?"

"No." he answered too quickly.

Elide stood up, throwing her arms in the air, "Lorcan!" she opened her eyes wide, "You quit over three months ago."

He grimaced, "Not really." he spoke so softly she almost didn't hear him.

Her frown deepened, "What do you mean, 'not really'? You're such a dick," she mumbled, shaking her head.

In the meantime he had lit more candles and was arranging them on the kitchen counter, but when he spoke he looked at Elide and she saw that he was holding back from insulting her in turn. "I'm not a dick, I simply didn't tell you that I had resumed..." he trailed off, then huffed, "two weeks after I quit."

Elide opened her mouth wide, "Two we-" then exploded, "Lorcan, it's bad for you.  B-a-d." she spelled, drawing the letters in the air with her finger, "Do you understand that if you keep smoking your lungs will turn so black they'll look like ash?"

Lorcan clenched his jaw, "I know, thanks for reminding me."

Elide crossed her arms over her chest, speaking in a strained tone, "Why did you start again? Why didn't you tell me?"

He turned his back to her at that, with the excuse of arranging the candles around the kitchen better, but Elide knew it was because he didn't want to look at her face. He didn't answer.

"Where are they?"

"What?"

"The cigarettes. The packet? Where is it?" she demanded to know, walking up to him.

Lorcan turned, taking a step back when he realised she was less than a metre away from him. He frowned, "I'm not telling you."

Elide's eyes went wide, "Why?"

"Because you'd snap them all," he said in an obvious tone.

She nodded vehemently, "Yes, exactly!"

Then he sighed, "Can we just let it go?"

"Sure, if you want to let it go that you're going to die of cancer and that you've been lying to me the whole time, we can let it go," she said, biting her bottom lip and shaking her head. Then she huffed out a laugh, "You're unbelievable."

"Ellie, listen, I'm not smoking as much as I used to, we're talking about one to two cigarettes a day at most," he tried to reassure her, running a hand through his hair. She could hear it in his tone of voice that he felt guilty and embarrassed, whether it was because he had lied to her or because she had found out she couldn't tell.

With a little more light brightening up the room, Elide realised only then that he was shirtless.

Fuck, she thought. Lorcan with his shirt off was a feast for the eyes.

She quickly shifted her gaze to the floor as the light returned in a flash and she was forced to close her over-sensitive eyes. They heard the tv turn on again and the melody of the video game fill the silence.

"Thank fuck." Lorcan muttered as almost all the alarms went off. Now only the few that had to be turned off manually and the dogs continued their assault on their ears.

When Elide opened her eyes again, she cursed. There was blood on the tiles. She leaned forward, looking down at the crotch of her jeans to make sure it wasn't hers, even though she knew she wasn't on her period. "Lorcan?" she asked hesitantly, then turned her head towards him, not moving her gaze from the floor, "I think you're bleeding."

"What? Oh fuck." he chuckled. Elide looked up at him at that point and saw him leaning on the table with one hand and placing the ankle of his right foot on his left knee. He looked up at her, "Your earring stabbed me."

A laugh bubbled out of her, "I'm sorry."

Lorcan looked into her eyes and his shone, "Don't worry, I'll clean it up."

"I'll help if you want." she offered, then yawned and cursed in the middle of it.

He snorted, one corner of his mouth curled up, "Nah, go to bed. I'll take care of it."

Then she let go a whine, "Oh my god my room is going to look like a crime scene if you managed to get blood in here too."

Lorcan smiled tightly, "I'll take care of that too."

Elide nodded, admiring her friend's bare torso and arms one last time.

If Lorcan noticed, he didn't show it, and Elide was grateful for that moment of discretion, they'd had enough of awkward moments for that evening.

Warning him that she was going to bed, she went into the bathroom, undressing very slowly and slipping into her soft pyjamas. When she returned to her room, she noticed a wet spot on the floor and smiled, realising that he had started cleaning from her bedroom. She shouted a simple "goodnight" to him and without waiting for an answer slipped under the covers, ready for a deep and well-deserved night's sleep.

Just a second before she could fall asleep, the door opened slightly and she heard what could only be Lorcan place something on her bedside table. She couldn't open her eyes or bring herself to talk in that moment to ask him what the hell he was doing, but when she woke up the next morning, two packets of cigarettes and the lighter he'd used the night before sat there.

tog tag list (if you wanna be added or removed just send me an ask or dm me)

@maastrash @ireallyshouldsleeprn @sleeping-and-books @ladywitchling @thegoddessofyou @ghostlyrose2 @claralady @anne-reads @sayosdreams @perseusannabeth @letstakethedawn @simping4bookboisngrls @thewayshedreamed 

[nyrandrea]

Broken

Riding on that sweet Rift Apart hype so I’ve written a little one-shot that takes place during the events of the game. (So spoilers, obviously).

Summary: Ratchet and Clank have a bit of a heart to heart while they wait for Rivet.

Also available to read on AO3 here!

Enjoy!

Clank let out a rattled sigh as a wave of relief washed over him when the large prison cell that held Ratchet and Kit finally tumbled to the ground. Albeit a little more roughly than he would have liked, but they were safe, that was all that mattered.

He and Ratchet may have had a fair number of close calls during their dangerous endeavours, but even he had to admit that he was a little shaken up at how close this one had been. If it hadn’t been for Rivet…

The small robot shook his head, deciding just to be grateful that they were all alive and well.

He gave Ratchet a quick smile as the lombax hopped down before his optics wandered over to Kit, who was still sat in the cell, hugging her knees to her chest. Clank frowned, thinking back to what Rivet had said about Kit being the one responsible for the loss of her arm. He couldn’t even begin to imagine the weight of guilt she must have carried on her shoulders.

Silently, he thanked his lucky stars that he had been created as a defect from the get-go.

Clank knew Rivet was stubborn and slow to trust, but he had seen a softer side to her during their short time together. He only hoped she had taken his words on board about forgiving Kit, because he knew that, deep down, Rivet really wanted to be friends with her. To have a partner. Someone to watch her back.

“Thanks for the save,” Ratchet said with a smile before frowning and turning back to see that Kit wasn’t following. “Kit, are you—?”

“Give us a minute,” Rivet interrupted, looking a little forlorn.

Ratchet’s eyes shifted between her and Kit, and he looked like he wanted to assist in the situation, but Clank understood this was something the girls needed to sort between themselves. Luckily, it only took a shake of the head for Ratchet to get the hint.

“We’ll meet you at the ship,” he finally said, still looking torn as he took Clank from Rivet’s back, slowly walking away.

“I understand you only wish to help,” Clank said once they were out of earshot. “But we can’t interject too much into their personal matters.”

“…I know, pal,” Ratchet mumbled back as he climbed up to the co-pilots seat, giving Phantom a nod as he did. “It’s just…”

Clank angled his head to give him a fond look; one that they had shared many times as a silent understanding. Ratchet smiled back, though his eyebrows were still slightly furrowed.

“If they are anything like us, I am sure they will make up quickly.”

Ratchet scoffed. “If Rivet’s anything like me, she won’t make it easy. I know I didn’t.”

Clank felt a shiver go through the lombax as he was settled into his lap, probably cringing at some memory of his teenage-hood. Whether it was his stubborn pride or tendency to whip out the snarky insults and sarcastic remarks; their first adventure had been quite the rocky one.

“You were quite hard-headed,” the robot admitted. “But you always did the right thing.”

“Then there was that stuff with the Zoni—”

“Ratchet,” Clank warned. It was a little awkward to glare at this odd angle, but he still managed somehow.

“I know, I know,” Ratchet said, putting one hand up in mock surrender. “I must’ve apologised a thousand times.”

“And continue to do so to this day, you really must stop.”

“Sorry, pal.”

Clank playfully elbowed Ratchet in the gut, to which he replied with a flick to the antenna. The robot couldn’t help but giggle, already feeling his frazzled nerves starting to calm down from their daring prison escape. Even more so when Ratchet started chuckling along.

“Besides,” Clank started, his laughs dying down to something a little more bittersweet. “I have also made my fair share of mistakes.”

“Oh yeah? Name one.” Ratchet challenged.

“Trusting Quark.”

“To be fair, you’d just been ‘born’, you were naïve.”

“The time portal on Zanifar?”

“C’mon, pal, you were trying to save your dad. I would’ve done the same thing.”

Clank could detect a hint of dejection in Ratchet’s tone, no matter how much his friend liked to think he was good at hiding his emotions. It made him a little more nervous at his next choice of words.

“This.”

“…What?”

Again, there it was. He was soft-spoken, like he knew exactly what Clank meant, but feigned ignorance, because he didn’t want to admit that the robot was right. He hated how good he was at reading his friend.

“This,” he reiterated, throwing up his one arm to gesture at the neon cracks in the sky that led to who knows where. “The dimensions collapsing. Us ending up here. Why, I am probably the reason that Nefarious even came out of retirement!”

If Clank could breathe, he probably would have been hyperventilating by now. He had tried to accept that it had just been a simple mistake; parading the Dimensionator in front of the entire galaxy and placing it right where it was ripe for the taking. Oh, how could he have been so irresponsible—

“Clank,” Ratchet prodded, and it was only then that the robot realised he had been trembling with self-loathing so much that he hadn’t noticed the hand that had been placed on his head in a bid to calm him down. “You know I don’t blame you for any of this, right?”

“Yes, well, I do,” he said, and he couldn’t help the acid that was laced in his voice.

A silence fell between them then, and not one that felt comfortable in the slightest.

“Actually, y’know what? I do too,” Ratchet finally piped up, removing his hand from Clank’s head, and when he turned to look up at him, the lombax held a frown that was usually reserved for the likes of Nefarious or some other dastardly villain. A sharp pain jabbed up through his circuitry along with guilt and shame, and a dash of dread.

“I mean, if it weren’t for you, we’d probably still be retired.”

“Yes…”

“We wouldn’t have met Rivet and Kit.”

“I…what?”

Ratchet’s frown slowly morphed into a gentle smile.

“And I wouldn’t have found the courage to finally go look for the other lombaxes.”

Clank wasn’t sure how to respond to that, all he could do was avert his gaze down to where Rivet and Kit were still talking. He noticed they seemed to be getting quite flustered with each other. An odd feeling suddenly fluttered in his chest as he watched them; one that he couldn’t quite place.

“That’s all down to you, buddy,” Ratchet said, squeezing Clank a little tighter against his chest.

“Then I am more than happy to take full responsibility,” he said, responding in kind. “Even with the added complication of two Nefariouses and the impending doom of a Dimensional Cataclysm.”

Ratchet waved a hand. “C’mon, we eat dimensional cataclysms for breakfast!” His ears drooped a little. “Or, at least, we used to.”

“You are still under the notion that we are ‘washed up’?”

“Not you. You’re the one fixing all the dimensional whatchamacallits—”

“Anomalies,” Clank corrected.

“Right. Meanwhile I’m…”

“Re-building Dimensionators, rescuing monks from undead bone creatures and searching for me,” the robot stated matter-of-factly as he counted with his fingers, before adding a despondent, “Again.”

“Yeah, I really gotta put a leash on you, pal.”

Clank tried to appear unamused but, in spite of his mild irritation, found himself smiling.

“My point is,” he continued. “Despite what you may think, you are an irreplaceable hero that any galaxy, dimension or even universe would be incredibly lucky to have.”

For once, Ratchet didn’t have a witty comeback, and merely blinked in surprise as Clank patted his hand.

“And an irreplaceable friend that I am incredibly lucky to have.”

He couldn’t help but feel a little flustered; the two of them were never really this outwardly sappy with each other, but after everything they’ve been through, perhaps they could make an exception just this once?

Even though Clank’s little speech sounded like it had been recited from some corny poem book that he would sometimes read as a guilty pleasure, Ratchet smiled fondly.

“Thanks, Clank.”

“Ugh…get a room…,” a voice mumbled behind them, startling the robot a little. He had forgotten that there was someone else on the ship. Turning to get a better look, he blinked and narrowed his optics a little.

“Is that…?”

“Yup,” Ratchet said with a wry grin, before adding, “Pretty weird, huh?”

“Not any more bizarre than anything else we have seen, I suppose,” Clank replied. “Though it does make me curious as to who else might have a dimensional counterpart. Ooh, we could make it a game!”

“So long as we don’t have to see Helga.”

“Ratchet…”

“What? It’s bad enough having a Qwark—”

“If you’d stopped to help me that night instead of running away, things could have been different. Or if you just told the truth, maybe—!”

Ratchet and Clank were stunned into silence at Rivet’s outburst, and shared a worried look as Kit retorted back.

“Why do none of you understand?! I am broken. I will always be broken!”

“Oh dear…” Clank mumbled, his brief time with The Fixer flashing across his mind. It seemed like the term ‘broken’ was becoming something of a theme recently.

Just like Ratchet, he desperately wanted to jump down and act as peacemaker between them, make them see that regardless of their differences, they could form a friendship that would stand the test of time and provide them with something precious that a life of solitude had robbed them of.

But he held his nerve and stayed put; this was a delicate situation, and not one that forced friendship could solve. So, he watched on sombrely.

“Fine. Go hide. We have a universe to save,” Rivet snapped, before throwing her hands up in frustration. “Universes. Whatever.”

The silver lombax turned and started walking back towards the ship.

“I don’t need a partner, anyway.”

There was a brief flutter of hope as Rivet slowed to a stop and turned her head slightly, as if she were reconsidering. Perhaps she would take his advice and give Kit another chance. Then they could all face down their enemies as one unified—

The robot flinched as her face twisted bitterly and she strode for the ship again; her choice had been made. He couldn’t help but feel a bit nervous as she practically catapulted herself into the pilot’s seat and started the ship up, punching the buttons as if she were blaming them.

“Wait,” Ratchet started cautiously. “Where’s Kit?”

“She’s not coming,” Rivet bluntly replied, not even bothering to make eye contact with him.

“But…”

Clank felt Ratchet’s fingers unconsciously tighten against his body, and in turn, he laid his hand on top and patted it lightly to reassure him. Deep down, he truly believed they would reconcile eventually, even if they had to take their time to come to terms with their inner struggles. After all, Kit and Rivet were his and Ratchet’s dimensional counterparts.

Despite the universe’s sense of humour, it would always find a way to mend the broken.

 X

I’ve been a fan of this series since I was a kid and yet I’ve never written anything for it *shock horror*

Anyway, I know it’s a little short and sappy but hey, let me know what y’all think! Might write more in the future if my adhd lets me. :,)

[chaoticpuff17]

A Dangerous Game

Part 6

masterlist

Arms wrapped around her waist tugging her back from the window sill before she had the chance to take the final step out of the room and away from him.

“No!” she screamed thrashing in his arms as she tried to escape his hold. “No!”

RM cursed tugging her further back into the room despite the wildly flailing limbs. “Are you insane!” he yelled throwing her onto the bed before stomping back over to the window to slam it closed and lock it in place as she sat up and watched the very clearly furious man. He whipped around to face her his displeasure abundantly clear. “What were you thinking?” he shouted rushing back to her and gripping her shoulders so tightly that it hurt, but she stayed silent. “What were you thinking?” he repeated violently shaking her.

“I wanted to leave.” She whispered slightly shocked by what had just occurred combined with the man screaming in her face.

“You wanted to leave?” he repeated eyes wide in disbelief. “You wanted to leave?” she remained silent knowing anything she said would only make things worse for herself. “And you thought throwing yourself out of a second story window was the best way to do that?” she looked up at him with wide eyes of her own knowing full well that she had fucked up.

He released her shoulders with a shove pushing her back down onto the bed again as he began to aggressively pace in front of it. She sat up again her limbs trembling as she watched him pace back and forth. He was muttering something to himself in Korean as he moved the meaning of which was lost ­to her, but she had the distinct feeling that it wasn’t good at least not for her.

In all the times she had met RM she had never seen him so blatantly angry before. He had always maintained a restrained dignity. Even when she knew she had upset him during their previous meetings the reaction had never been like this. If she had been scared of him before, she was terrified now. And there was nowhere else to run. She was trapped in an enclosed space with the most dangerous man she had ever met, and he was furious with her.

Her breath hitched as he abruptly stopped his pacing. His back was to her with his head bowed and his breathing harsh.

“You.” He hissed whipping around to face her. “You idiot girl. Did you think that you can escape me so easily?”

The anger was still very much present but there was a mask of control slipped back in place. She wasn’t sure which scared her more, the yelling or the cold rage she saw now. Hot anger burned away. It exploded. It was terrible, but it burned away. Cold anger lingered, and made life hell for everyone in its path.

“I’m going to attribute this moment of… insanity to the concussion and the shock.” He informed her his mouth set in a hard line, his eyes dark and burning with controlled anger. One of his hands came up to grab her chin in a bruising grip forcing her to meet his gaze head on. “I will not allow such an action again. It won’t go unpunished again. Do you understand me?” she remained quiet gazing at him with wide fear filled eyes. “Do you understand me?” he questioned again tightening his grip and raising his voice just a little.

She nodded wincing at the tight grip he had on her.

“I need words, jagiya.”

“I understand.” She whispered trembling in his grip.

He released her with a smile as he took a step back from her. God how she hated those dimples. “Good. Now, I’m going to send Miss In back in to help you get ready.” He explained straightening his collar and acting as though he hadn’t been enraged less than five minutes ago. “I’ll be back when you’re finished, and then we are going to sit down and speak like civilized adults. Alright, jagi?” She nodded keeping her eyes focused on the bed spread beneath her. “Words, jagi.” He reminded her sharply.

“Yes.” She hissed a bitter taste filling her mouth.

His hand returned to her cheek in a gentle caress. “Good girl.” He hummed stepping back to head for the door.

As soon as the door closed behind him she was filled with an overwhelming sense of nausea. She made a mad dash to a door on the other side of the room grateful to find an en suite on the other side before she lost the contents of her stomach. That was where Miss In found her hunched over on the polished tile floor of the bathroom tears streaming down her face.

The older woman clicked her tongue and came over to help the woman up from the floor. “Come now, bu-in. We need to get you cleaned up, yes?”

She didn’t say anything, but she did allow the older woman to help her up from the floor though she was still had a tremor in her hands and her face was white as a sheet. The older woman fussed over her guiding her to sit on the little ottoman placed in front of the sink.

“I’ll run a bath for you, bu-in.” the older woman hummed mainly to herself as Y/N wasn’t really listening to her. “And we’ll call for the doctor to check on you again now that you are awake.” She decided nodding to herself as she went about her tasks. “You were asleep for a long time, and the doctor needs to check your head again.”

That caught her attention. Her head whipped up to stare at the other woman. “How long was I asleep?” she asked almost frightened to know the answer.

“You were asleep for a full day, bu-in. Sajangnim was very worried for you.”

“What happened to the man who was in the car with me? Is he here? Is he alright?” the questions flowed from her before she could stop them, but Miss In had no answers for her.

“Man? What man?” she asked her brow furrowed in confusion. “There was no man with you, bu-in. Sajangnim brought you here alone. You had a cut on your head. He said there had been an accident.”

“There was a man in the accident with me. Is he alright?” she asked again desperate to know what had happened to her companion. She knew full well that he had taken the most damage from the crash.

“I don’t know about any other man, bu-in, but your bath is ready. Try not to get the bandage wet.” The older woman motioned her into the tub before leaving her alone to soak in her thoughts as she went to go about her other duties until Y/N was ready to get out of the tub.

The lack of answers along with the stress of the day had left her tired. The bath helped her to relax, but it left her with far too much time for her thoughts to wander. What had happened to Eun-ho? What did RM want with her? Who was RM? How long was she going to have to stay here? If RM wasn’t going to let her go, how was she going to escape? She had a bad feeling that she wasn’t going to get the answer to most of those questions, or at least she wasn’t going to get answers any time soon.

All too soon, Miss In was back to collect her from the bath room ushering her into a robe and sitting her down on the ottoman again to dry her hair before escorting her to the ridiculously large closet that was attached to the main room. The entire closet was bigger than her bedroom back home had been and had clearly been decorated with a woman in mind. The wall paper was a muted shade of teal with a cream tree pattern across it. And all of the furnishing were set to match. Everything in cream, or like the great round ottoman in the middle of the room, a muted shade of teal.

Miss In was quick to ferry her into a pair of undergarments and settle her in front of the vanity to do her hair and makeup. Overall, Y/N felt like a child or perhaps a doll as the other woman styled her hair into loose curls before she moved onto her makeup, and Y/N let her unwilling to do anything that would incur RM’s wrath again, not after her spectacularly failed escape.

In hindsight she really should have known better. She should have known that the bedrooms would be on the second floor, and that jumping out a window would be a futile plan. It was a stupid plan one that had been fueled by panic and not actual foresight. It had been doomed to fail from the beginning. Even if she had managed to throw herself out the window she probably would have sprained something at the very least. And then there was the fact that RM’s estate was gated. She knew that. She’d learned that the first time she’d been here or at least where she assumed here was. She didn’t actually know. That was the downside of waking up in strange places after being unconscious.

Even if she was like a doll at the moment, Miss In was gentle at least. Her touch was light and maternal almost as if she knew how traumatized her charge was. Her tone was always soft, and her smiles were gentle. She was a calming presence in an otherwise panic inducing situation.

“Bu-in.” the lady spoke placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. “I have a dress prepared for you, but first, sajangnim has prepared these for you. He would like for you to wear them.” She was presented with a pair of stunning earrings. They had a pearl at the top and two strings of diamonds that dangled down from them elegantly. And it made her sick to look at them.

“I can’t wear these.” She shook her head gently placing the box that contained them on the vanity.

“You must, bu-in. Sajangnim has requested it.” The touch on her returned to her shoulder, firmer this time but still gentle, a gentle reminder that she didn’t really have choice in any of this.

She reluctantly put on the earrings hating how they looked dangling from her ears, hating that they were a gift from her kidnapper. She hated how lovely she was made to look, RM’s doll. But the bandage on her forehead served as a reminder that everything was not as lovely as it seemed.

“Come now, bu-in. We must get you dressed.”

With a reluctant nod, Y/N allowed herself to be pulled up and guided into a blue sundress far finer than anything she had in her own wardrobe at home, and she hated that too. What was worse was that every single thing that Miss In had placed her in was in her size. It was here pulled from the drawers and wardrobes of the closet, and it was all pre-prepared and in her size.

“I think I’m going to be sick.” She whimpered sinking down to sit on the ottoman her head in her hands.

“I’ll bring you some ginger tea.” The kind woman tutted fussing over her as she helped her up and slipped her into a pair of house slippers before leading her back out to the main room and helping her down onto one of the sofas. “Sajangnim will be here in a moment, bu-in.”

“No.” she whimpered. “Please no. I don’t want to see him.” she begged grabbing onto the other woman’s hand and looking up at her with big doe eyes.

“Everything will be alright.” The woman placed a kind comforting hand on her cheek before leaving her alone in the room to await her captor.

When RM returned it was as though he were never angry with her to begin with stepping into the room with a charming grin on his face.

“You look lovely, jagi.” He took a leisurely seat on the sofa across from her completely relaxed.

“Thank you.” She murmured through gritted teeth knowing she had to be polite at least for a little while, until she had answers.

“Miss In told me you were feeling unwell. I’ve sent for the doctor. He’ll be here later to look you over and change the bandage on your head.” He announced eyes flitting up to the bandage before they moved to the earrings she had been forced to wear. “I see you got my gift. They suit you.”

“Was all of this necessary?” she asked fiddling with her fingers in her lap refusing to look at him as she did so.

“Of course. Only the best for you.”

“But why?” she questioned her brow furrowing. “Why am I here?”

He paused almost contemplatively. “You are here because I want you to be here.”

“Why?”

“Why does anyone do anything? I did it because it pleases me for you to be here.” was the easy reply that fell from his lips.

She sighed in frustration ready all but ready to throttle the man when he had only been in the room a few minutes. “That doesn’t explain anything.”

He sighed leaning back in his seat as he spoke. “I would have waited to bring you here, waited till you were more comfortable, but you do get so easily spooked, jagi. I didn’t account for you being a flight risk quite so soon. Luckily I already had preparations in motion. I am sorry though that you were hurt. That was never my intention.” The apology was strangely genuine as he frowned at the bandage decorating her forehead as if it had offended him in some way.

“Till I was more comfortable…?” the implication left her stunned. Till she was more comfortable. “How long were you planning this?” she whispered horrified. “How long were you planning to kidnap me?”

“It’s not kidnapping, jagiya. I simply removed you from a bad situation.” Her eyes were wide completely horrified by what she was hearing. He was delusional, completely delusional.

“The only bad situation I’m in is this one.” she hissed. “I was going home.”

“And what was there for you there?” he scoffed. “You’ve said yourself that all that was waiting for you there was a fat cat.”

He was about to continue when a knock on the door interrupted. “Enter.” He called over his shoulder never taking his eyes from her.

Miss In glided into the room carrying a tray of tea with her placing it on the coffee table between them with a respectful bow. She picked up one of the cups and handed it to RM before picking up the other cup and handing it to her with a smile.

“Drink this, bu-in. It will make you feel better.”

“Thank you.” She took the cup with a shaky smile. Watching wistfully as Miss In left the room leaving her alone once more with RM.

She turned back to her captor placing her cup of tea back on the coffee table. “You can’t just kidnap people.” She groaned in frustration glaring at the cup of tea though it had done nothing to her.

“Jagiya,” he grinned leaning forward and placing his cup on the table as well. “I can do anything I like.”

“People will look for me.” she argued.

He grinned the expression almost vicious. “And who would dare go against me?”

“I would.” She hissed.

He laughed, a full bellied laugh full of mirth, and it did nothing but sent her teeth on edge. “I know, jagiya. You are a rare bird. It’s why I like you so much. You’re too good for them, jagiya. You’re better off here.”

“You’re insane.”

“Not at all, jagiya. I’m simply a man who knows what he wants.”

“I don’t even know you’re name, and you plan to keep me here for God knows how long?” she scoffed looking up to send him a heated glare.

“Of course not, jagi. I know exactly how long you’ll be staying here.” He smiled bringing out those damned dimples in full force though something glinted in his eyes that sent a shiver of unease down her spine. “You see, you won’t be leaving. Ever. And as for my name, I’m Kim Namjoon.”

part 7

[hello-im-not-a-possum]

16. Play.

Noticing the power shift created by Joey’s new form and role in his story, the Ink demon, the Prophet, and the now much more lucid searchers are interested in playing a few games with their old pals Henry and Joey. (Or not very interested, in the prophet and searchers’ cases) (Set in the AU where by yeeting Joey into the ink machine before going through the portal-door in the kitchen, Henry is accompanied by a chatty, useless, and overall insufferable little imp.)

The novelty of Joey accompanying him as a friendly, (Henry used that term loosely considering what he knew now.) tiny, cartoon demon wore off the second the story actually kicked into play. For starters, the former animator knew that whether either of them liked it or not, Joey was going to be clinging to him whenever he felt like it and following him like a lost puppy.

At the moment, the imp was running ahead of the animator, tapping his feet impatiently as he ‘waited’ for the old man to catch up before scurrying off again and occasionally tripping, but Henry knew that by the time the Ink Demon came into play, the little devil would use him as a meat shield.

 Speaking of the two devils, Henry approached the freshly boarded up ink machine room which Joey was already peering into with an uneasy expression on his pale face. The animator also peered into the room, but instead of being greeted by the Ink Demon popping out of the hole and starting the chase, he watched the Ink demon pace about the small room with an expression he’d never seen on it before: a grimace.

In addition to the demon’s seemingly much more expressive face, he seemed to have a different approach to his role as a villain now that he had no script from Joey to follow; a villain who was much more dangerous than a smart animal.

“SAMMY! JACK! JOHNNY!”

The Ink Demon shouted and called up three figures of ink.

“Alright, now listen up you three good-for-nothing, sewer-water-brained Lackeys, the creators will be here ANY second now, and if I find out YOU STUPID INK BLOTS let them get away, I’m gonna wring your necks out like wet towels! Do I make myself clear?!”

“Yes, your vileness.” The swollen searcher with a bowler hat replied in a tired sounding tone.

“Clear as day, your assholiness.” The Prophet added, sounding like more of a smartass than he had ever been when he was alive.

“Y-yes… Lord Ink Demon… We’ll take good care of them all right! W-well not good, but- EEEP!” a third searcher that appeared to have teeth made out of piano keys meekly stuttered and hid from the Ink Demon’s untrusting glare from behind the safety of the Prophet’s legs.

“Good! Now listen up: they’ve started up our machine already so we don’t have much time to plan: So what do we do to stop them?”

“Uh... ...Same thing as always?”

“W-well… I’m sure that you’ll have the best plan out of all of us, your rottenness!”

“You can stick your hand out of the holes in the boards and watch them run and fall to their doom like a pair of stray sheep who don’t see the cliff.”

“NO! When Joey’s not in control, I’m calling the shots around here! And I say: We’re not going to run his stupid story through the machine any more! We’re doing something completely different, something that will really make ‘em suffer...”

“Henry!” Joey tugged on the man’s pant leg and whispered loud enough for him to hear, but not loud enough to grab the ink monsters’ attention. “He can think and talk! He’s not supposed to do that! Hell, aside from Sammy, none of them are supposed to be any smarter than feral animals! Not to mention, they all look different… I think that stuff on Sammy is supposed to be hair, but it’s never been THAT long before...”

The Ink Demon slapped his forehead and grumbled under his breath.

“Speak of the %*#@ing devils…” He then stared expectantly at the confused trio of searchers. “WELL?! THEY’RE HERE; RIGHT OUTSIDE THE DOOR! ARE YOU GONNA MAUL ‘EM OR ARE YOU JUST GONNA SIT AROUND WAITING FOR THE COCKROACHES IN YOUR HEADS TO CHEW UP THE GARBAGE YOU CALL BRAINS FIRST?!”

“Why not take the pleasure in offing them yourself, your dicklessness?”

“Uh, Yeah, and when you fail at that, we’ll set up traps for ‘em downstairs. It’s not like they’re gonna escape the studio.”

The searcher with piano key teeth sheepishly nodded along.

“What?! But I had this cool dramatic entrance planned out and everything- ARGH! FINE!” The Ink Demon grumbled as he started breaking the boards. “If you want a mauling done right...”

Henry held Joey like a football as he ran through the rapidly flooding studio as the Ink Demon cackled manically throughout the chase.

“READY OR NOT HEEREEE I COOOOMEEEE~”

Henry found himself having to jump and duck to avoid a lot more falling debris and had felt the demon’s claws at his back at times, the situation was not helped by Joey screaming and crying the entire time.

He felt more dread than relief as he saw the exit coming in, no matter how close it got, he never got to it, like every time before, the floorboards broke underneath his feet. He always fell, and now, someone would try to catch him.

“HA! NOT WHEN I’M IN CHARGE, CREATOR!”

And would succeed.

It happened so fast that Joey couldn’t tell if he did it intentionally or not, but he had slipped out of Henry’s grip and had fallen down to the depths of the studio with a loud ‘splash’ announcing his arrival.

Announcing that he was alone, defenseless, and weak. In a studio that Joey now knew no longer was his to control, and was filled with many, many enemies who would fully take advantage of that.

“Y-you just need to stay c-calm, Joey...” He pulled himself up on a floating piece of stray wood and started paddling towards the valve. “There’s an ax nearby, all you need to do is get to it and you’ll be fine. you’ve seen Henry do this hundreds of times, you’ll be alright, you just need to believe in yourself.”

In spite of his reassuring speech, the scared little imp felt a large pit of dread in his gut. The former Music director, former lyricist, and the former organist would probably hesitate if it was Henry instead, but those three caught him... Joey shuddered just thinking about it. 

As the ink drained he took his miraculously unstained bath robe off of the floor and put it back on. He was also missing his pants now, but it wasn’t like he could go back up to get them, and even if he could, he wasn’t going to fight the Ink Demon for a pair of fucking pants that were too big for him anyway.

“Get the ax, get back with Henry, get the ax, get back with Henry, get the ax, get back with Henry...”

He repeated to himself under his breath as he repeated his task of descending and turning valves as an attempt to keep himself from jumping at every twist and turn. The imp also kept his eyes peeled for anything that looked suspicious or out of place, fearing the looming threat of the searchers’ traps.

The ax and the room was exactly how Joey had left it, not a single thing changed, which did make him feel relieved.

When he moved forward, he didn’t find any evidence that Sammy was worshiping Bendy at all when in the shrine room, there were plenty of ritualistic circles, plenty of cryptic messages, but they all had the little devil as a thing that was meant to be sacrificed, not as something worth the former musician’s worship.

“Of all the runs for Sammy to not worship Bendy...” He groaned. “It HAD to be the one where I became an imp...”

He wasn’t sure whether he was grateful or even more afraid when he didn’t see Sammy moving the cutout around.

------

When Joey got to the music department itself, he heard the sounds of laughter, pool balls clacking, cheers and glasses clinking in the distance. Following the sounds, he found the three searchers lounging around the pool table in the middle of a conversation and a game.

The upbeat atmosphere fizzled out when the three noticed him. The Swollen searcher muttered something about the game just getting good, the Piano key-toothed searcher groaned about Joey spoiling all the fun as usual, and the masked mad maestro smiled at him.

Not in a sarcastic or forced way like how his human self smiled at people, it seemed genuine enough. But it also wasn’t a warm or kind smile, it seemed more ...hungry.

“Hello little Lamb.” The prophet stood up and got into the imp’s face,  “Are you interested in playing a game with us?”

‘Oh fuck, he’s still crazy.’ Joey thought to himself. “N-no thanks!” He smiled and waved hoping that he didn’t look as terrified as he felt. “I’ve got a friend of mine to get back to and I really don’t have a lot of time to play.”

The imp dashed out of the break room and slammed the door shut behind him, completely unaware that the merriment had returned to the room.

“Thank god he didn’t go for it.” Johnny sighed. “If The Ink Demon found out about this room because of that little runt...”

“I told you it would work.” The prophet took the mask back off and set it aside on a crate. “...But he’ll probably come back to pester us into trying to help him find Henry, maybe even take up the game offer.”

“Yeah...” Jack poured himself another shot. “Kinda surprised that you didn’t jump at the chance to make his life hell though.”

“Less is more.” The prophet hit the eight ball and watched the rest of them knock against each other. “If you get one big punch left to linger, it hurts like a bitch, if you get hundreds of them, you grow numb to the pain. But I don’t think that Inky understands that.”

“Well, at least he can have fun playing his game of cat and mouse with Joey...”

“Yeah.” Johnny raised his glass. “Cheers to those two being each others’ problems instead of ours!”

“Cheers!”