#YOU'LL NEVER BE A BOTHER!!!!!!!!!!!

[yeonban]

Send me ✔ and I’ll bold what my muse would do with/for yours.

@skarletchains asked: ✔ Shalnark (I just came to be a bother lol)

Acquaintance:

hold the door for them | help them carry something | let them borrow something | let them use their phone | smile at them when passing in the streets | shake hands with them | flirt with them in a bar | share a taxi with them | give them a ride home | lend them money | sit next to them on public transportation | offer them some food | help them find something they lost

Friendship:

let them stay the night | listen to them complain at 4 am | help them get over a break up | go out shopping with them | pet sit for them | help them move houses | help them find a lost pet | go on vacation with them | stay up all night with them | help them hide a dead body | provide an alibi for them | take their side in a break up | talk about their future plans | be maid of honour/best man/etc. at their wedding | share food with them

Lover/Fling:

let them stay after sex | gentle sex | rough sex | experiment | handcuffs | bdsm | whips | orgasm denial | aftercare | cuddles after sex | tea/coffee/etc. after sex | gentle kisses | rough kisses | passionate kisses | sloppy kisses | lazy kisses | hang out without sex | hide their relationship | cheat on them | cheat on someone else with them | dirty talk | loving talk | gentle touches | rough touches | nervous/shy touches | say “I love you”

Married/Dating:

take them on expensive dates | pay for dates | make them pay for dates | go to the movies | put out on the first date | get an arranged marriage | stay at home most nights | cuddle in front of the tv | propose first | drop hints until they propose | give a big/expensive/elaborate proposal | have a quiet proposal | say yes to a proposal from them | have a big wedding | have a small wedding | elope | get married in Vegas | go on an expensive honeymoon | go on a cheap honeymoon | have kids | get a pet | move in together | laugh during kisses | laugh during sex | tickle fights | fight over who’s cuter | make them sleep on the couch after fights | make up sex | angry sex | no sex | let their parents stay over | let their family visit often | tell them “I love you” every day

Sibling/Platonic:

fight | hug | laugh at them when they get hurt | help them hide a dead body | provide an alibi for them | tell them they’re annoying at least once a day | share food with them | help them move houses | walk them down the isle | try to sell them online | set up an online dating account for them (to flood Kurapika's phone with useless messages that'll get in the way of him receiving important info) | set them up on blind dates | try to set them up with your friends | listen to their problems | help them cook | cook them food | make them watch shows they don’t like with them | tell them they’re an idiot/loser/dork/nerd affectionately

Enemy:

fight them | take petty revenge | kill them | try to smother them in their sleep | hire an assassin | work harder to beat them at something | follow their social media just to get mad about it | make passive aggressive remarks towards them | spread rumours about them | laugh at them when they get hurt | take pleasure from them being upset | ruin their life

[emile-hides]

I cannot believe no one’s gifed POV Ramattra tilting your chin up with his staff yet. Must I do everything around here.

[pipisguy]

@spamtonsometimes uhh... I was pretty sure you had answered my tags saying "ah the perry the platypus effect" and telling us that you changed your style to draw biblically accurate Spamton... but I can't find the post so maybe I dreamt it up??

Anyway

[captain-astors]

Burn it!

[cometnoodle]

thought itd be fun to put edelgard in (vaguely) historical outfits from 1180s-ish, byzantine-ish and the holy roman emperors' coronation regalia lol

[starry-bi-sky]

ive been hesitating to ask this bc youve been on a roll with the clone^2au (which i am frothing over) but could i poke you for some childhood friend au? bc GOD i wanna see how danny reacts to reuniting w jason or how the rest of the batfam react to learning jason never told danny of his resurrection or wondering if dannys gonna put jokers dead body on a display/offering to jasons grave. i havent been normal about this since i first read it and was wondering. thank you for your writing.

RAAAAHHHH DON'T BE HESITANT I AM JUST AS FERAL OVER MY CHILDHOOD FRIENDS AU AS I AM WITH CLONE^2 I AM DELIGHTED BY THIS. Like.,,,, i literally love them,,, so much. I can't listen to The Crane Wives without thinking of them.

(which is my fault - the ao3 fic of them has literally only crane wives lyrics for each chapter title and summary (posted AND the ones not written) so of course im gonna associate with them.)

(if you wanna listen to some of their songs while thinking of cfau here are my recommendations: "Once & for All", "Here I Am", "Hollow Moon" is a Danny AND Jason song to me, this would be my go-to song for an animatic of CFAU if i had the skills for it. "Tongues and Teeth", "Curses" and "take me to war" is a heavy cfau danny song to me, and of course, "the moon will sing")

Like they're BEST friends dude, they're two sides of the same coin and when they were kids they would do this thing where their 'fingers crossed'/'double-crossed' was them hooking their index fingers in the fingers crossed gesture.

and i'm actually currently rewriting my original post into a more fic-like format, and when I'm done I'll post it on here under the cfau tag - with the original post still in tact. But its,,, gonna be so long dude,,,, the original behemoth was just over 9000 words,,, and I've written 3k words already of the new one and we haven't even reached Jason and Danny reuniting at the gala yet,,, i need to get back to that,,,

and then to answer your questions!! god im almost hesitant to answer because i dont wanna spoil the little fic i had planned for it but also like,, its not like im gonna spoil everything, right? and answering the questions isnt the same as writing the scene down so!!

i love danny and jason's reuniting, like i've thought about it SO much and I've thought about it happening after Danny kills the Joker. I know the reveal could have been before that, and it could have been equally just as dramatic but like??? Thematically, doing it after danny kills the joker is SO good. To me at least.

Because like?? Jason's been in somewhat denial about danny's plan to kill the joker for months. ever since danny told him that he wanted to at the gala. And from Jason's pov its not even technically a plan. He sees his best friend for the first time after five years and his best friend still isn't over his death. He hasn't stepped foot in Gotham since his funeral and now suddenly he's here.

And he's still so full of grief over his death that he tells a masked vigilante that he's going to kill the guy that did it, who lives in said masked vigilante's city. And danny's got that look in his eyes that Jason knows so well that means he's being serious. And yet he still doesn't know if he should believe him or not.

And then he does. Danny kills him. And Jason can't fucking believe it. And when he goes and sees Danny, Danny's hands are still covered in blood. And that reunion? God like a fucking firework show. Danny's so fucking angry, and pissed, and hurt, and so goddamn overjoyed that he's alive and here that he sends them both to the ground, and if he doesn't calm down he's gonna take out the power in a five block radius.

there's just so, so much yelling on Danny's end. And then so much crying, first from Danny and then them both. because god, you're alive. you're here. i've missed you so much. i'm never letting you out of my sights again.

and Joker's death! God I don't want to actually say too much about that, but the way I have it set up thematically makes me actually not want danny to take any part of the joker with him as an offering. and he may actually forego that particular ghost etiquette and offer something else as an offering to Jason in substitute to not bringing him the Joker's heart/head/ritualistic body part.

Because you know what the last thing a man whose been spending the last two decades of his life building himself up to be larger than life would want? A death that's unremarkable. :) and that's all i'll put on the matter for now.

and the batfam!! they technically already know that jason hasn't told danny he was resurrected, and plenty of them have mixed feelings on them. largely bruce and dick i think, considering they saw firsthand how close jason and danny were when they were kids.

Dick was honestly surprised at first when he found out that Jason hadn't told Danny he was alive - and on one hand he understands the reasoning for it, and on the other hand he isn't sure if it was such a good idea. Especially after he sees Danny again after he arrives back in Gotham and sees just how badly Jason's death was still affecting him. But it's not like he's going to try and convince Jason to tell him - he can make his own choices, even if Dick has questions about them.

Bruce has much the same thoughts as Dick, so there's not really much to add here other than he might bring it up once or twice to Jason like, vaguely. And then immediately drops it when Jason shuts him down. He might actually somewhat...?? prefer that Jason hasn't told Danny because that raises a lot of questions and could jeopardize their identities. However, again, Jason can make his own choices and there's not much Bruce can do about it other than disapprove from afar.

Tim who knew of Danny from stalking the Wayne family shares similars sentiments of being surprised that Jason didn't tell Danny, but again, yeah, understands the thought process to some extent. Doesn't bring it up ever.

Everyone else who hadn't seen firsthand how close Danny and Jason are don't really have much opinion on it -- Jason didn't tell his best friend he was alive, great, he also didn't tell them either so it's not like its that much of a surprise. It would've been more of a surprise to them if Jason had told Danny before he told Bruce and co. Damian may make a comment or two about Jason not telling Danny, but its not about how he can't believe he didn't tell him or anything like it.

[shepherds-of-haven]

speaking of red, i love how blade can awkwardly ask mc how they feel about red now that he's back and how he's so visibly relieved if you tell him you guys are just friends 😭 he's so goofy (i love him dearly)

Blade: so... your relationship with Red.......

MC: oh we're just friends :)

Blade, feeling a mysterious feeling of bliss and wellbeing and benevolence and magnanimity wash over him: oh i see....... not that i cared at all. anyway. let me buy you a drink. I am feeling generous and peaceful all of a sudden for no reason at all

[good-oldfashioned-lover]

Wtaf? You're fucking insane and I thought you were genuinely apologizing? You're crazy bitch And you're a coward for making You're friends and your stupid little girlfriend to come at me instead of handling it yourself James is such a sweet person and he is a bottom! He would never make someone beg to him like what? Stop ruining jegulus and stick to your jily for fucks sake

Bitch ok time to get rude

First of all, why tf do I even need to apologize? I have NOTHING to apologize for!?

Thank you yeah I'm crazy. All the best people are.

I'm sorry hello I'm the coward? Newsflash: you're the one hiding behind anonymous. And I'm sorry you don't have real friends who stick up for you ok? So back the fuck off my friends (also stfu that's my girl you're speaking about she is literally one of THE best people I have in life. I'll literally punch you but oh wait, you would never have the guts to do this irl)

And can you for fuck's sake stop asking to make James a fucking peice of cardboard with a smiley drawn on it? And also, did he come to you and say that he is a bottom? Cause he came to me and said that he likes fucking Regulus and hearing him whimper and be in near tears and begging as much as he likes getting fucked by him too. Sorry boo I guess you got fooled by a knockoff Jamie.

Idek which is funnier, the fact that you came back or the fact that you read tha whole thing before coming here 💀

[medinaquirin]

I hate letting shitty people take up real estate in my brain, but sometimes the bastards refuse to leave.

[capricioussun]

I feel like one of Edge's favorite ways to mess with people is by pretending he doesn't believe it's possible he could've forgotten something. Especially funny because he has memory problems. Someone will remind him of something and he’s just like 'hm. You never told me' 'Forgot? Why would I have forgotten?' 'It sounds very interesting, I wouldn't have forgotten something like that' <- this will go on until the "accuser" gives up. He acts like forgetting is something you choose to do. Mircodosing his loved ones with gaslighting to build their immunity <3

[hylianengineer]

The stupid streaming service website has decided that I am forbidden from watching Ted Lasso, specifically. I have tried six times and every time there is some sort of critical error. Usually it just freezes but on one memorable occasion everything was in French and it wouldn't let me change the language preferences.

[starswallowingsea]

Every time I think about how the Colleen Hoover fangirlies get mad when people even suggest that they should try and diversify their portfolios I get really, really sad. Like I don't think you have to read classics or anything and be an elite snob but if you limit yourself to just Colleen Hoover and maybe Sarah J Maas and a few other popular booktok authors, you're missing out on so so much. Even if you just want to find good new releases, keeping up with the book of the month club will give you plenty of options (even if you can't subscribe to them and have to get them from the library). Diversify your portfolio. Read older mass market paperback romances or literally anything else.

[izzythehutt]

.

I know responding to your critics is pointless, but occasionally I'll lurk in the HP fanfic subreddit out of vague curiosity and I remain perplexed at the idea that I've presented Sirius as the problem in his relationship with his parents. I mean, it's subjective, they're sketchy and problematic af so you have to accept the premise that the relationships are worth salvaging to even read the damn story, and if you have a terrible relationship with your own parents maybe this isn't the story for you, but like.......seriously? His mom is a neurotic basket case who thinks tricking him into a trad marriage will somehow keep him from leaving her lmao it's hilarious but not healthy

[danielnelsen]

ok today's bug discovery: the fade-touched nevarrite ability that makes the target explode on death says it does 75% weapon damage, but im pretty sure it actually does 200%

[yunwooz]

woosang ♡ for @miinsang

[krash-and-co]

anybody saying lockwood is a copy of kaz I will fight. if you say this you are legally obligated to read the books to redeem yourself or else it's *pounds fist*