#YEERK

[dr-reids-fidget-toy]

I wonder if a yeerk could fix my migraines. like how much power do they have over brain chemicals?

[goldmanguyperson]

old drawing of mine. it is excellent

[ametat-arts]

animorphs yeerk comm for luminas!

[somesecretpie]

I am looking for a human host!

Are you bored?

Are you lonely and bored?

Do you have a lot of time on your hands?

Do you have hands?

I’m offering you a proposal, with potential financial compensation for your troubles. It may sound off putting at first blush, but hear me out. I am looking for a human host. And I mean a “willing” human host who might be willing to give up some of their time to help out an odd fellow that doesn’t have hands or blood.

Am I asking to control your body? Yes. Sometimes. You’ll still be there, but taking the backseat. Now you’re probably thinking “That sounds no fun! I don’t want to spend all my time riding shotgun.”

And that’s valid.

But you all spend about half of the day unconscious anyway. Your body is just there, doing nothing—a complete waste. As for me, I don’t sleep (haha), so we could have it so that during the day, I will graciously let you do fun human things, and at night, I’ll do whatever. And by whatever, I mean perfectly safe, perfectly reasonable activities.

I don’t drink, and I rarely go outside.

I enjoy baking, I look at pictures of birds online, I’ve been getting into neuroscience lately. Very interesting stuff. You’re all very interesting.

And maybe you’re still thinking “Hey now, I don’t want some random mind-controlling thingy hauling my body around in my sleep, “Weekend at Bernie’s Style” to which I say, you’re no fun and you’re not the kind of person I want to live with anyway.

“But I’m a light sleeper!” you say.

Don’t worry! I can isolate your somatosensory cortex so you can’t feel anything.

“But my family will think it’s weird!” you say.

Don’t worry! You don’t have to tell them.

Actually, I would prefer that you don’t tell anyone. Please.

And should anyone question me, I’m not bad at impressions. I’ll get really good at a “you” impression, it’ll be the first thing I do!

I know this all sounds very strange and potentially unpleasant, but remember the financial compensation that may or may not be happening. Hell, I’ll even do some of your chores if you like, while you sleep. You can wake up and the dishes will be done, laundry folded and coffee made. Doesn’t that sound nice? And then you open the fridge and oh, what’s this? Someone baked banana bread last night (that was me, I baked banana bread last night.)

Now I should say, I don’t have a lot of standards, I really don’t. But I do (unfortunately) have some, so let’s just get them out of the way before I waste your time.

Please do not contact me if you have any of the following:

- Anemia: Sorry, it’s just not going to work out. I can pay for iron supplements, but I can’t work miracles.

-A weak immune system: I don’t like getting sick, I’m sorry. It’s gross, sick people are gross. I mean I know it’s not your fault, but healthy folks only please.

-A strong immune system: Yes, I know what I just said, but I also don’t want to be attacked by your immune system. So maybe you’re not the picture of health, but you’re just kind of okay. I’m looking for someone who is just kind of okay.

-A penchant for alcohol: It makes me feel strange…

-A name that starts with a P: I’m not the greatest at “speaking.” It’s hard, moving air through your throat and moving your tongue and your mouth at the same time. You all do it so easy—can’t say I’m not envious! I’m the worst at making the “P” sound.

I intentionally avoid any "p word" in conversation, and get by well enough, but I’ll look pretty foolish if I’m cavorting about, pretending to be you, and I can’t even say your name!

Those are my standards, but really, other than that, I’ll take anyone.

I don’t care if you’re male or female or anything in between.

I don’t care if you’re gay.

I don’t care if you’re smart.

I don’t care if you don’t have a lawyer.

There are so many things that I don’t care about.

Now, I’ve specified all the ways in which I could compensate you and how our relationship will be not in any way problematic, but I want to stress that, above all things, I am looking for a friend.

Someone I can spend quiet evenings with.

If you want to hang out with me during the day, that’s great! I can give you fun hallucinations. Or you could have hallucinations the normal way, like by reading, like what you’re doing now. I love to read! I love doing funny voices. I wonder what you think I sound like?

I hope I sound nice.

And one of the best things about me is I’m very quiet. No one else will be able to hear me except you. I’ll be like your own personal friend that only you know. Like a secret friend. And you don’t even have to talk to me because I can read your thoughts.

I suppose I should tell you a bit more about myself, since you’re still reading.

I was born in the Everglades, I think. It’s been awhile.

But I remember being so cold…

And so alone...

But then I met this sweaty man in a colorful tee-shirt, with a camera, and half a granola bar, and with blood so hot.

So yeah, he was my first host, and I’ll admit, we weren’t the best of friends. It was a confusing time for both of us. I was confused. He was confused. What happened was really both of our faults, you could say…

He was a bird watcher, if I recall correctly. Just watched birds all the time. I thought it might have been out of jealousy—watching those little things flying around makes you feel kind of stuck. I felt stuck.

So I decided to be a bird for a while to see if it was really all it’s cracked up to be. Squished myself into the body of this lovely American crow. We settled down, built a nest, and laid several nice, healthy eggs with a man-bird by the name of “Richard Baxter.”

He was a very proud bird, very large. And he gave me so many wonderful gifts. Like children, and also small pieces of plastic.

I still have all of them.

The plastic, not the children.

I’d never been so happy, all these hormones had me consumed in the joy of motherhood, but the crow’s health was failing. I could not sustain myself—it’s pathetic little heart beat weaker and weaker.

I tried starving, I tried everything I could, I wanted to be a bird so bad. But it just wasn’t working out.

The bird stopped working.

The other crows held a funeral service for me, even though I was still alive. I tried to tell them, but I’m not good at speaking, you remember.

It was all just a big mess.

I haven't seen Baxter since, but I still think about him a lot.

Is that weird?

I’m totally over it though, haha.

After that incident, I got kind of depressed... I possessed a lot of trash animals—gulls, racoons, and salespeople. I did what I could to survive. That’s kind of where I am now.

I am currently living in Miami florida—been body surfing almost every day (haha). Right now I’m using a library computer and a librarian. She does not like being possessed, boy howdy are these fingers twitching. But you can thank her for my halfway decent grammar.

I’m tired of feeling like a parasite.

I want to try a different approach.

I want to be friends? Like with Richard Baxter except I also live in your brain and drink your blood sometimes. But I’ll make you bread in your sleep, so it’s okay.

It’s been really hard finding someone willing to put up with me.

I’ve tried everything.

So I thought I would put up an advertisement online, why not?

Can’t say the P word in real life, but you can hear it in your head loud enough I hope.

I know I kept saying that I would compensate you financially, but I’m going to be real with you, I don’t have much. I’ve got like twenty bucks, some small pieces of plastic and a book about...finance....

But I’m a real hoot! ;D

So,

(P)lease,

If you are interested, leave your comments below. I would love to get to know you :)

I need to go now, the library is closing soon, but I’ll get back as soon as I can.

[forlay]

physique of a wiener dog

@titus-uno-cpa-fcpa-and-cgma

[that-jack-kline-bestie]

alternate version

[circuitfurscaleandvine]

🔥Imagining an Affini, with her newly captured, rather feral Terran, and a very very devoted Yeerk floret~ A: "Alright, time to go to the clinic! Pop your collar on miss" T: <Like I'd ever do that you we-> Y: "Yes Mistress! <3" ... Y: "You were the best host ever..." T: "You know, I was thinking um... after the implant, maybe I could still be your host some time?" A: *Mass uploading pictures of Yeerk blushing to the net* (Massive thanks to Magnolia and Aubrey~)

[auntphibian]

Since y'all really liked my other animorph art, here's one from the Hork Bajir chronicles.

The more I read these books the more I hate the Andalites, which I think is suppose to be the natural progression of the reader.

First off, Seerow's kindness is just tragic all around. If I was super advance and saw intelligent life stuck living in mud puddles or monkies I'd want to help them as well. But at the same time I understand the Yeerks. If my choices were mud puddle/monkey or I could take a host and experience the joys of sight and sound.... i think I'd take a host. It's all around such a tragic situation and it's such an amazing story to hear play out.

And man, the Hork Bajir. Poor Dak, you learn your entire species was specifically made to be less intelligent and now every other species looks down on you for that. I feel bad for Aldrea too of course. Seeing your entire family killed then forcing a war on peacful species because it's that or enslavment.... just... man.

I love these chronicle breaks but it's really not much of a break when it's so much freakin sadder. But I do love Aldrea and Dak, they wefe adorable. Very Tarzan and Jane but with way more war and way more tragedy.

[edorielle]

[littlecrazyhelmacron]

Boop

Yeerks have snoots! I checked! They can be booped!

[princessmagpiesart]

Three yeerks are swimming in the pool, K-I-S-S-I-N-G! 💖💖💖

[ See more art on Patreon or Request art on Ko-Fi! ]

Bonus Poly Pride Yeerks:

[dr-reids-fidget-toy]

Lmao animorphs

X

[cantheykillmacbeth]

Saw your response to the "can Tobias Animorphs kill Macbeth" question, and while I completely agree with you (I think the argument that after being trapped as a hawk he considers himself as much bird as boy, so he'd be a bird of woman born rather than a man of woman born... But I digress.)

I'm not sure how much you know about Animorphs, so I'll explain my question as clearly but succinctly as possible. If you're familiar with the series, you can jump straight to the last line of this ask

The Yeerks from Animorphs are a species of parasitic space slugs with anywhere from 0 to 3 genders--it's unclear, we only know that it takes three parents to produce a batch of offspring, and that the parents die in the process, which in no way resembles what we would call "being born of" anyone at all

So given all this I think it's pretty clear that any given Yeerk could theoretically kill MacBeth, though being in their natural state just big slugs they'd have significant difficulty doing so

But Yeerks don't tend to do their killing in their natural form, and this takes us to our question:

Yeerks leave their feeding grounds by crawling into the ear canal of other species and taking over their brain. The controlled human or alien has zero controll of their actions except for seconds at a time, and even then only under extreme emotional distress

Could a Yeerk, piloting the body of an otherwise ordinary, human male born to an ordinary human woman, kill MacBeth?

Yes! They would still count for, at the very least, the Unconventional Birth Clause. We've discussed possession a couple of times before, and our ruling is that the host essentially acts as the possessor's murder weapon, so the identity of the possessor is what is taken into account versus the identity of the host.

In the original play of Macbeth, Macduff doesn't kill Macbeth with his bare hands, he kills him with a sword, but the sword isn't credited with the kill, Macduff is; this theoretical man of woman born would be the sword, while the Yeerk controlling him would be Macduff.

I hope that makes sense. Thank you for your submission!

[enthusispastic]

Considering every animal that you have either touched, or had the opportunity to touch in the last month (allowing the acquisition trance to overrule safety measures aside from trespassing).

Of course, in the tags or replies, share what animals you're using for each!

[lizord-lord]

haha i should really catch up on the muppet joker lore-

why are there yeerks now.

[fanonical]

if i was an andalite i wouldn't last five minutes. i would find myself falling asleep and accidentally slicing my own guts out before i even saw a yeerk