#Who is still together from Love is Blind UK

[afabstract]

Love Is Blind: UK Reunion Reveals Who's Still Together

Six couples dressed in wedding finery in season one of "Love Is Blind: UK" to marry the love of their lives, but only three pairs said "I do!" The "Love Is Blind: UK" reunion episode reveals who's still together a year after the show.

Follow us on Twitter | Instagram “Love Is Blind: UK” had a pretty successful run—three couples ended up walking down the aisle, looking very much in love as they made their vows and promised to spend the rest of their lives together. However, getting married within a month of knowing each other comes with its own unique challenges. The reunion episode of “Love Is Blind: UK” takes a look at what…

[itsillyakuryakin]

I'd like to thank @kimissteeringwheel for the tag!

Pairing/Shippy list!

Here's the rules:

1. List your top seven ships

2. Put all of them in order of your love for them; 7 to 1, 1 being your favorite.

3. Name their fandom.

4. Supply photos for said people.

So here we go-

7. Jenson Button x Fernando Alonso [Ship Name: Buttonso / Jensonando]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reasons: Because why not? They have the chemistry, they have the potential, they have their own thing going on every now and then- give me a good reason to not ship these dorks.

6. Napoleon Solo x Illya Kuryakin [ Ship Name: Napollya / Illeon]

Fandom: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. [movie 2015]

Reason: Pure Grumpy x Sunshine trope. Illya is shot tempered and keeps himself isolated most of the time, but Napoleon knows how to get under his skin (👀) and adores his Red Peril to death. I mean, he literally jumped in those deep waters to save his life- what more prrpf do you need?

5. Charles Leclerc x Max Verstappen [ Ship Name: Lestappen/Verleclerc ]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reason: Seriously? You need a reason? Aren't those subtle touches on Charles' lower back after the podiums, or even when they're close to each other, not enough? Isn't that habit of Max not being able to stand in one place after seeing his favorite Ferrari boy enough? Isn't their inability to not mention each other once in every interview ever enough? They're the definition of "Love is blind"

4. Mika Häkkinen x Michael Schumacher [Ship Name: Makkinen/ Mikael]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reasons: The classic Finn x German trope. They say they're not friends yet can't seem to leave each other alone. They basically defined each other's lives in the sport and outside of it by staying side by side in every battle. A win wouldn't feel like a win to any of them if not snatched by the other one.

3. Carlos Sainz Jr x Lando Norris [ Ship Name: Carlando / Muppet Friends ]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reasons: THEY'RE MY COMFORT SHIP!!!! They take care of each other, mention each other everywhere, go on golf dates (and dates) with each other, spend time with each other on family weddings/holidays and even after it's been three years since Carlos switched teams, their bond keeps on getting deeper and deeper. And these two were the ones people initially thought would not get along. They proved everyone wrong, and still are. I personally believe both of them progressed a lot as a personality after meeting each other. Specially in Lando's case- He's a big brother to Oscar now. Carlando for life!

2. Nico Rosberg x Lewis Hamilton [ Ship Name: Brocedes / Rosmilton ]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reasons: REASONS??? FOR WHAT EXACTLY??? Both of them come from two totally different worlds and background - one with everything and one with almost nothing. Nico grew up in a lavish lifestyle but he established that friendship doesn't care about your background. It's just friendship. And he had his fair share with Lewis, a little boy from the UK who found a friend in a place and time he least expected to be. They went on vacations together, raced each other as teammates - both in karting and F1, which was a dream they both promised each other of when they were practically babies. But the same dream tore them apart later in life and they're so close and yet so far. And the fact that it's not fictional is just tragic.

Honourable Mentions:

Destiel [ Dean Winchester x Castiel] - Supernatural

Cherik [ Charles Xavier x Erik Lehnsherr]- X-Men Universer

Stony [ Steve Rogers x Tony Stark] - Marvel Cinematic Universe

Johnlock [Sherlock Holmes x John Watson]- The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes

Hannigram [Will Graham x Hannibal Lecter] - Hannibal.

AND DRUMROLL 🥁

1. Kimi Räikkonen x Sebastian Vettel [ Ship Name: Simi / Kibastian ]

Fandom: Formula 1 RPF

Reasons: Who else has ever had the ability to make the Iceman smile bar the little unhinged sassy German that we all love and worship the most? Kimi is so comfortable with his surroundings when around Seb and actually laughs and speaks by his own will! They both spend time playing badminton and Kimi actually addresses Seb as his friend. Like- is this a dream? IT'S REAL!!!! Get yourself someone who smiles at you the way they both smile at each other. And after all- it's Sebastian. You can't resist his charm- no one can ✨

Like look at them:

Uff. This was a long post but I enjoyed it. Thanks a lot to everyone who read it to the end.

I'd like to tag @thatquirkycookie, @sebbuh , @wdkzms, @rednyx-sf, @muppet-friends and @sainzinnorris to participate. And anyone who sees this post and wants to do this obviously. No pressure though. Do it only if you feel like it!

[frikatilhi]

9 people you’d like to get to know better!

Thanks for the tag, @ana-chronista!

three ships: Currently, Bojere duh. Previously, um, there are many to choose from but let's go with Steve/Bucky (MCU) and Steve/Danno (Hawaii Five-O) and leave my dark rpf past out of this one.

first ship: I'm not sure how I got into shipping exactly, because by the time Merry/Pippin came along it was not new to me. But it was the first big one, which very quickly lead to Monaboyd, which was the first huge one. Can't believe those guys are still friends after more than 20 years since meeting (!!!) and doing a play together soon (!!!) (man, if that was in Europe I'd be sooo tempted).

last song: Apart from last night's JO stream, Hyvää yötä ja huomenta by Don Huonot (it's for... reasons, ok?)

Luodinkestävää sydäntä Ei oo vielä keksittykään Turha pelätä laukausta Sillä yksinäisyys saman reiän nakertaa

last film: In the cinema, Barbenheimer. I don't get to go as much nowadays, but I used to see something around 50 movies a year at the theather (including festivals). Some day I'll go back to Midnight sun and Rakkautta & anarkiaa and spend my days watching four films in a row...

currently reading: Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux (physical book) and Miehiä ja mielenrauhaa by Marja Kangas (on audio), both are for book club. (If that one friend from book club who is a Käärijä fan and sometimes reads fic happens to lurk on Tumblr: if you saw this NO YOU DIDN'T) I used to read a lot, but since the kid and getting back into fandom I barely read any actual books /o\

currently watching: Kid shows on Yle Areena omg. When I need to turn my brain off, I tend to gravitate to trash reality, like Temptation Island Suomi, Selling Sunset or Love is Blind or the likes. We also watch Taskmaster UK a lot. Last finished show was Ted Lasso, which I kinda want to watch again soon. Shows that I should finish at some point: all the Star Wars stuff on Disney+, Daisy Jones and the Six, Community rewatch, Three Pines

currently consuming: Pepsi Max (always)

currently craving: Breakfast even though it's almost lunch time, forgot to eat this morning

No idea who's been tagged already and who's done it, so here are some random tags: @devotedlydarkcrown @maladroitoracle @reserved-fruit @cinder-rose @lumea-art @neppu @bambiesque @drugsforaddicts @izpira-se-zlato

[harvymoran]

════════════  (WANTED) CONNECTIONS  ⋆  PINTEREST  ════════════

Full Name: Harvey Moran

Age & Birthday: 29 / October 11th, 1994

Occupation: Owner of Through the Grapevine Winery (since feb '24)

Preferred Pronouns & Gender: He/him & cis-male

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Birthplace: Hampstead, UK

Length of time in Briar Ridge: 15 years

Neighborhood: Beach Front

🖋 Played & Penned by: Leo Woodall / Syd

Welcome to Briar Ridge … HARVEY MORAN! ... He is best known for [ his family's construction company 'MORAN CORP' ] and [ the result of that was him becoming the new owner of GRAPE VINE WINERY after buying it from a well-known and respected elderly couple in Briar Ridge ]. What is really important to know about them is [ that he's often misunderstood and continuously feels out of place in every space he puts himself in. ].

Harvey was born in Hampstead, UK, and moved to Briar Ridge at the age of 17. Although his parents had every intention of keeping him within their reach, they couldn't say no to their only son when he asked them to go to university in the US. With the promise of considering taking over the family business, Harvey was off in search of what more life could offer him.

At university, Harvey studied botany on a whim. While he tried to not take his privilege for granted, he didn't exactly go to uni in the US for its prestige in academics. Something was missing, something that felt out of place within him. Harvey was convinced he would find that elsewhere, so he told himself it didn't really matter what he studied; it was the experience.

Harvey never had a hard time getting along with someone. He carried a type of confidence that never made him doubt himself, and many seemed to like that about him, including Maika Bishop, who he quickly started dating after meeting her on campus. Love hit Harvey at first sight incredibly hard, and every question he had in life seemed to find an answer in Maika.

The next four years only solidified Harvey's adoration for her, and with graduation coming around in the next few months, he realized he couldn't be without her. He knew he was getting ahead of himself by proposing on Valentine's Day, but Harvey was a romantic, and he couldn't think of a better moment to start their lives together than the night that started it all. Lit candles formed in a circle in the backyard of her place, and while he expected to be met with tears of joy, he quickly realized it was not joy Maika was experiencing. He could suddenly feel the pain in his knee drilling itself into the concrete, bringing himself to stand when she started confessing things about her sexuality, feelings for their mutual friend, and a rejection ...to put the cherry on top.

To say that night changed him would be an understatement. Harvey was hit with the realization that he was back at square one, wondering if he even went anywhere and if he was just blinded by love this whole time. Devastation struck him, but before he crawled back to his safety net, Harvey wanted to give himself one more try. One more chance to find that something that he hoped was still out there.

Most would call what Harvey intended to put himself through a 'gap year.' He had prepared to travel for a bit and cross some countries off his bucket list, but he ended up staying an extra year and a half due to some unforeseen circumstances*. Despite trying to avoid those privileges, it's what saved him and eventually earned him ownership of Through the Grapevine Winery and a free ticket back to Briar Ridge.

It's been a few months, and while Harvey's yet to completely digest what he's been through, the looks people have been giving him lately have not been going over his head. He's learned recently that his parents had bought the vineyard from an elderly couple, and while he wants to believe it's the new ownership that's the issue (and not someone in his *late* twenties taking over thanks to mommy and daddy's wallet) he's determined to turn things around. He's done searching and wants to make something of himself with what he's got— even if was on a silver platter.

* Said unforeseen circumstances is a wanted connection in which Harvey and another muse could've gotten into some trouble overseas within the past two years which ended up in his parents rescuing both of them via money. Read more HERE.

[lifeofkaze]

Lullaby for a Stormy Night

Happy (non-UK) Mother's Day to all mothers, aspiring mothers, people who lost their mothers (my heart goes out to you), and basically, all of us. We rock 💛

A/N: Ethel and Florence Hexley (in mention) belong to the best of the best @the-al-chemist

The library of Fraser Hall lay plunged in shadow. A few hours ago, pale sunlight had still touched the oaken shelves, but now, the only sources of light were the lightning bolts splitting the sky in half and the pearlescent glow of the lithe little ghost hovering next to the woman sitting by the window. 

Selene Fraser’s brows were drawn together in a concentrated frown. In her hands, she was holding the tassels of the curtain, strands of its fringe interwoven with her fingers. Her eyes flickered to the letter lying in her lap, and, with a huff, she let the tassels drop again. 

“I must be doing something wrong, Alan,” she muttered to the ghost of her pet ferret. “Mrs Hexley has spelt it all out for me, but I can’t seem to get it right. Why must this be so hard?” 

“As usual, you do not lack in understanding. Only patience,” replied a voice that sounded as if it came from far away. From behind a bookshelf, a second shimmering figure emerged, its feet floating inches above the burgundy carpet. Alan’s ears twitched at the sight of his undead companion, settling contentedly on Henry Lovecraft’s shoulder as he came to a halt next to Selene. He cocked an inquisitive brow at the darkness of the room. “Why haven’t you started a fire?”

Selene startled, as if only now realising how dark it had become. “I must have forgotten. Mrs Hexley sent her response about my plight with Caitlin’s hair. I couldn’t wait to put her suggestions to the test, but they turned out to be a lot more complicated than I thought.” She gave Henry a pleading look. “Can you, perchance, make sense of it?”

Raising the letter in Henry’s direction, it took the flicker of defeat crossing his face for Selene to remember that he wouldn’t be able to take it. With a sting of remorse, she turned the parchment of him to read in the little light he and Alan were exuding. 

“Why must plaiting a little girl’s hair be so impossibly complicated?” she said glumly as Henry’s eyes flew over the lines. “I barely manage to contain it. Why can’t she just keep it down, like me? It’s all I ever wanted when I was her age, but she seems to despise it.” 

Henry paused. The beat it took for him to answer filled the room, the storm howling outside appearing all the louder for his silence.

“Caitlin is not like you, Selly.

But I wish she were.

Guilt rose in Selene’s chest upon thinking it. She knew what it felt like not living up to a mother’s expectations. Caitlin maybe was tenaciously stubborn in her wish to be prim and proper, but how could Selene love her any less for it? She was her daughter, after all.

“When I was her age, I always had to be presentable, no matter the circumstances,” Selene frowned, her eyes resting on the shield with the painted golden stag above the fireplace. She thoughtfully turned the heavy gold ring on her middle finger. “It was stifling, Henry. I hated it. It’s not what I want for Caitlin.”

“You and Caitlin are not the same, and neither are your lives,” Henry repeated softly. “You were a bird afraid of being caged. Caitlin is a bird afraid of finding it has nowhere to land.”

“But she has me. She has all of this,” Selene insisted, indicating the vastness of the estate surrounding them. More quietly, she added. “And she has you.”

“I’m happy to provide her a place of comfort when she needs it.”

“She loves you,” Selene said, looking at the rain pattering against the glass rather than at Henry. “You’re the closest thing to a father she has.” 

Henry’s face was unreadable. “She has questions. If only you -”

“No.” Selene’s voice was sharp. “I won’t have her dreams crushed like this. It would be too cruel.”

“To her or to you?”

Selene’s answer was drowned by the sound of rolling thunder. A blinding white flash cut through the night, a vein of bright light connecting the storm-heavy sky to the surface of the nearby lake. The walls of Fraser Hall seemed to shudder under the impact, and Selene was almost sure she could hear the window panes ringing. She rushed to the window, pressing her fingertips to the cool glass, hoping to see another lightning bolt following the first.

When it did, a sound from within the estate made her freeze. Someone was screaming.

Caitlin.

In less than a heartbeat, Selene was out of the library and running down the hallway. She had already taken the first flight of stairs when the next lightning cracked, almost stumbling as she skitted around the corner and burst into her daughter’s room.

Caitlin sat upright in her bed, huddled against the wall and hiding her face between her drawn-up legs. The wind had pushed the tall window right beside her bed ajar. Icy raindrops whipped inside, the curtains billowing like dark, ghostly creatures reaching for the terrified, sobbing child. 

Bracing her shoulder against the window, Selene closed it again, drawing the curtains tight. Lighting the candle on Caitlin’s bedside, she carefully approached her trembling daughter.

“Caitlin?” she asked softly. “What happened?”

Slowly, Caitlin raised her face from between her knees. Tears were streaming down her cheeks, and she was hugging the stuffed cow her godmother had given her tightly to her chest. Alan floated past Selene towards her, but when he touched his cold nose to Caitlin’s cheek, she shivered and moved away.

“Where’s Uncle Henry, Mummy? I need him to come.”

Selene did her best to not let her disappointment show. She looked behind her to signal Henry to take over but found he wasn’t there. She frowned. She could have sworn that he’d been right behind her. In fact, she had passed right through him in her rush to get to Caitlin. Where had he gone?

“I don’t know, sweetheart,” Selene said slowly, turning back to Caitlin. “Maybe he has gone to ask the thunder about new stories. Actually, I bet that’s where he’s gone.” She hesitated. “Will you make do with me until he returns?”

Caitlin said nothing, resting her chin on top of her cow’s head like she had done since she was big enough to hold it. Every moment of her silence made Selene’s heart sink a little further, but when a heavy gust of wind made the shutters outside rattle and Caitlin jumped in terror, she closed her arms around her daughter anyway.

“There’s no shame in being afraid,” she murmured, gently rocking back and forth. “Thunderstorms are scary.” 

Again, Caitlin remained silent. She sat stiffly in her mother’s arms, shrouding herself in a silence Selene didn’t know how to read. When she was almost convinced that Caitlin wouldn’t answer her at all, she quietly said:

“You’re not.”

Selene tilted her head. “I’m not what?”

“Afraid. Of the thunderstorms. How is that?”

Selene had never thought about this. As long as she could remember, storms - especially here, in the Scottish Highlands - had always glued her to her window. There was something fascinating about them, both empowering and humbling. The very air seemed to be alive, thrumming with energy. She had often sat in her bedroom after her parents had gone to sleep, looking at the patterns the lightning would draw on the sky, imagining how the rain would feel on her face and the wind in her hair.

“I think,” she heard herself say,” I like thunderstorms because you can’t confine them. No matter what you do, a thunderstorm will not be tamed.”

“I wish they would. They’re ghastly.”

The little quiver in Caitlin’s voice made Selene’s heart squeeze. Tentatively, she placed her hand on Caitlin’s back. 

“Why didn’t you call for me earlier? This is only an autumn storm. There’s no reason for you to be afraid.”

“Of course you would say so!” Caitlin suddenly lashed out, angrily shaking off her mother’s hand. “You’re not afraid of anything, not ever. You wouldn’t understand!”

Rendered speechless, Selene blinked several times. Caitlin was shaking again, but it wasn’t from fear. When she turned away, Selene recognised the flash in her daughter’s eyes. She saw the anger, but more importantly, something else Selene remembered all too well - helplessness. 

“Do you know what Granda Angus used to say?” she said softly. “He said, when it thunders, the gods of yore beat their drums to dance. Doesn’t that sound merry to you?”

Caitlin didn’t look convinced but tentatively nodded. Encouraged, Selene continued. 

“He never seemed to run out of stories. They were the most fantastic ones, even more fantastic than Uncle Henry’s, but you mustn’t tell him I said that.” 

Caitlin wrinkled her nose, but her chokehold on the stuffed cow had eased. “This can’t be, Mummy. Uncle Henry’s stories are the best.” 

“It’s true, I promise. Granda knew stories about this land, and ghosts, and fairies, and every creature you can possibly imagine. No one knew more about our home than him.” 

Selene smiled sadly at the memory. Angus Fraser, who had been more of a father to her than her actual father, had passed away just short of two years ago. She still missed him terribly. 

“Every night before I went to bed, Granda would tell me one of his stories,” she continued. “He claimed he was Dream Angus, come to bring me all the adventures I could possibly dream of. And after, Grandma would sing to me.” She paused. “Would you like me to sing for you, too?” 

Caitlin considered her offer for a moment. She nodded.

“I think I’d like that.”

“Come here, then.”

Selene held her arms wide and waited for her daughter to nestle against her chest. Softly, she began to sing.

Dreams to sell, fine dreams to sell, Angus is here with dreams to sell. Hush now, wee bairnie, and sleep without fear, For Angus will bring a dream, my dear.

The familiar melody made a smile appear on Selene’s face. Without meaning to, she slipped into the soft accent her grandmother had spoken with, not as hard as her grandfather’s and uncles, but softer, enveloping her like a blanket that felt like home. Dream Angus had been her favourite lullaby growing up, but she hadn’t sung it in a long time; not since Caitlin had decided she was old enough to go to bed alone. 

The sound of her grandmother’s voice singing her to sleep was probably what Selene had missed most every time she had to return home to Edinburgh. Her mother had never sung to her, not that she could remember. Even now, years later, the thought seemed absurd, but it didn’t matter. The time for Selene and her mother had passed.

Despite herself, the thought of Lucretia Fraser lingered, stirring a familiar sadness in Selene’s heart. How often had she hesitated, not daring to ask for what she truly wanted when she bade her mother goodnight? How often had she wished she’d reach out and hold her, stroke her hair and murmur soft words of motherly affection? She had imagined it, so many times, hoped that once - just once - things would be different. That she’d be loved for who she was and not for who she was raised to be. 

Over time, the feeling had changed. The yearning in her heart had been filled by others, but never entirely. Her grandmother, Mrs Hexley - her best friend’s mother - and, of course, Ethel herself; they and so many others had loved Selene for herself, and Selene had loved them back. She’d let them inside her heart, but somehow, they had never quite fit. The hole at its very core had never been completely closed. 

She looked down at Caitlin’s wild curls as she sang, the notes dropping from her lips heavy with the love she felt for this little, stubborn girl, who was so much like her and yet so little. Caitlin had broken her and made her whole again, in ways Selene had never believed possible. Maybe it wasn’t what she’d wanted, but whatever Caitlin had done, the scar on her heart barely hurt anymore. She had healed her, and Selene would do everything in her power to thank her for every hour of every day. 

Maybe she wasn’t the mother Caitlin wanted or needed, but in this moment, with the wind raging outside, and the thunder rolling, and the wood of the home Selene had made for them creaking comfortably around them, she felt that maybe - just maybe - she could grow into the mother Caitlin deserved. She would never let her feel as unseen as she had felt growing up. She didn’t know how, but Selene wasn’t scared of rocky roads. She always found her way.

Dreams to sell, fine dreams to sell, Angus is here with dreams to sell. Hush now, wee bairnie, and sleep without fear, For Angus will bring a dream, my dear.

The last of the notes sunk into the peaceful quiet of the room. Selene let it linger, enjoying the wistfulness wrapping around her for a moment longer. 

“It’s not true, you know,” she breathed softly. “I am afraid. More often than you might think.”

Her admission was swallowed by the stillness. Caitlin had gone still in Selene’s arms, her chest rising and falling steadily. Smoothing down her messily plaited hair, Selene lowered her back onto her pillow, covered her and her stuffed cow with the duvet and blew out the candle. 

Rising carefully, Selene stood by the window. The worst of the storm seemed to have passed; the wind had made a gap appear in the heavy blanket of clouds, and through it shone a sliver of the moon. Everything looked different in its silvery light; the old leaves, the dust, the dirt of the past few weeks, all of it had been swept away by the storm. Tomorrow, the sun would rise again in all its glory, and the world would glow fresh, and bright, and beautiful.

That was what she loved about storms, Selene realised. The way they made things new.

Tearing herself away from the view of her beloved valley, she turned to leave. In the doorway, she could see the pearly white silhouette of Henry. She didn’t know how long he’d been there, but he gave her a slight nod, which Selene answered with a grateful smile. She looked back at her now peacefully sleeping daughter. 

The storm outside had passed, she thought to herself. Maybe one day, theirs would, too. 

Tagging: @endlessly-cursed

[dreamsister81]

"I think it was in '93 that Jeff came to our house for Christmas. My wife, our two young boys, and Jeff. He shows up a couple of hours late in the afternoon wearing a top hat and a fur coat. It was the first appearance of the fur coat; he had just purchased it. I think he had just gotten some money from Sony. He bought a top hat and this fur coat. I think the left sleeve was held together by safety pins. He appeared at our front door. Our sons Nick and Ben were one and three years old at this time. He was leaving later that day to England to visit people, visit some friends. He showed up at our house carrying an open, half-used Christmas basket which he had gotten for a gift from Columbia Records. This was his offering to the Christmas festivities at our house that day. There was a Christmas tree and he put the open basket, with half of the stuff in it eaten, under the Christmas tree, which I thought was really nice. He was sharing his booty. And I thought that was very sweet. That was just a great day, a lot of lying on the floor playing with the kids. He exhibited something that day which I had never seen before. It's late in the afternoon, now the television is on and Warner Brothers' Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies cartoons were on and my three-year-old son was sitting on the couch. All of a sudden Jeff got up and stood next to the television, just to the side of it. He was word-for-word miming these cartoons, and these are some maniacal music and maniacal songs with extremely complicated rhythms to the soundtracks and the pratfalls. He knew every beat and every word. My son Nick, who always spoke very well, he kept looking at Jeff, and looking at the TV and looking at me, and this went on for a couple of minutes and Nick finally went, 'Dad, how is he doing that?!' And I said, 'I don't know, Nick. I don't know...Just sit down and watch him.'"-Steve Berkowitz from A Wished For Song

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"Somewhere I might have a video. My sons Nick and Ben, are four and two, says Steve Berkowitz. "They would watch Silly Symphonies and Merry Melodies while Mom and Dad made dinner. Jeff was over, lying on the couch watching these cartoons with the kids, and then, all of a sudden, he is standing next to the television and mouthing all the words and music of the cartoons and acting them out and being silly. Nick looks at me and says, 'Daddy, why does he know that?'

"'I don't know why Nick, just watch him...'-from Jeff Buckley: From Hallelujah To The Last Goodbye

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"We first met while he was staying with a friend in London during the Christmas holidays in 1992, at what was once the Dome cafe on the corner of Kings Road in London. He was a fairly penniless musician at the time, so I bought him lunch. The first meeting was almost like going on a blind date, not romantically, but we got on so well immediately. He wasn’t the most gregarious person, but we clicked and connected: we were similar ages and were both just starting out. I think we were in the cafe for about four hours.

"During that first meeting, he said to me that he’d never want to play an arena, and if I expected to make any money off him, I was talking to the wrong person. He loved playing small rooms, which is why when we met he laid down the gauntlet for me to find tiny venues for him to play. I remember him saying to me that when people are talking in a venue he would try to use their noise to become part of the song, so the whole thing would blend together. But the reality is that nobody ever did talk at his gigs. They were completely silent. People would listen and watch with their mouths open half the time."-Emma Banks of Creative Artists Agency, and Jeff’s UK live agent, via The Guardian, 8 Mar, 2016 (I believe the year was actually 1993, not 92 due to Berkowitz's anecdote above, Jeff was still with Rebecca Moore in 92 and naturally would've spent the holidays with her-though technically they could've sent him as a matter of business, but still, 92 would've been a bit too soon after he'd been signed, and it obviously makes more sense he'd go to London to meet with Emma that year as he was due to return in March of 94.)

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Just before this trip, he had been to England for a week over the New Year, to visit Elizabeth Fraser, the singer with Cocteau Twins, whose voice, he told me, stopped him in his tracks. "It sounds like light," he said.-Dave Lory, from Jeff Buckley: From Hallelujah To The Last Goodbye (the trip mentioned would've been in January, 94, the start of the Sin-é solo tour) 📷 Merri Cyr/Nicola Dill

[chaosincurate]

My month in music - March 2023

slowthai - UGLY (new)

black midi - Hellfire (revisit)

Black Country, New Road - For The First Time (revisit)

machinegum - Conduit

Alvvays discography (revisit)

Fall Out Boy - So Much (For) Stardust (new)

Yves Tumor - Praise A Lord Who Chews But Which Does Not Consume; (Or Simply, Hot Between Worlds) (new)

Regina Spektor - Soviet Kitsch

boygenius - the record (new)

slowthai - UGLY

This slowthai album is really interesting. My experience with slowthai prior to this was limited to Nothing Great About Britain, and I loved the punky energy of that album which merged unbelievably well with his grime stylings to summarize the (justified) angst-ridden experience of the more combative sect of working class Britain, by mixing together the music of the disaffected, frustrated youth of two different generations, similarly to The Clash's London Calling.

This time out though, while anger and frustration are present, they take a bit of a backseat to mental illness and despair, which called for a genre change, and slowthai picked the perfect genre in my view: post-punk. This new sound is not only a better thematic fit than his previous one would be, but it also suits slowthai very well, because, as the name suggests, it isn't too distant from punk in terms of what is required of the performer, but it sounds very different, switching energy for a bit of complexity which suits introspection very well.

Not only is this a fascinating example of artistic consideration for an album, it's also just a great album, and makes for a great introduction to UK rap for alternative rock fans, and vice versa.

Apple Music link

black midi - Hellfire

I've spoken about this album before on my top albums of last year list (spoilers, it tops the list) and everything I said about the album still applies for me. The album has a dynamism and charisma I've seldom seen before. The energy is transcendent, the lyrics are darkly whimsical and almost dauntingly dense, the instrumentals are virtuosic yet restrained to artistic sense in a way that many virtuosos aren't... What's not to love? I believe this album is deserving of godly worship, and may well be my favourite album of all time. Sure, it has it's flaws, but I simply get too whipped up in the beauty of it all that I become a blind evangelical follower of this album's glory. Praise be to Hellfire!

Apple Music link

Black Country, New Road - For The First Time

Although their later album, Ants From Up There, is my favourite of the two albums Black Country, New Road have put out, For the First Time has it's own place in my heart too. For one, it's one of the only albums that contains an instrumental I managed to get into enough to have in my library (I'm usually appreciative of their role within an album, but for whatever reason, they rarely do anything for me outside of making for good transitions), but it also has a sound that leans more towards Joy Division-style post-punk which I appreciate in a wholly different way to their later album.

They have the same patience about their music, a willingness to draw a sound out and let it roam where it may, which, in my experience at least, is very unique and personally highly appreciated. But it's sonically way darker than Ants From Up There, more imminently haunting, all of which makes it so that, even as someone who doesn't like the album as much, I never think of this album as living in the shadow of the other, an issue that band discographies can face if they are unwilling to offer anything new.

Apple Music link

machinegum - Conduit

machinegum is a superband of sorts, with the lineup containing Fabrizio Moretti of The Strokes as well as Ian Devaney from a band that I can't say I've heard of called Nation of Language. They have a wikipedia page, so I imagine I'm just losing touch at the ripe old age of 22. In any case, I heard way more Strokes in this album than anything else, but for me it just didn't hit the same. There were some standouts that I still really like, though, even after a few weeks worth of listens had made me bored of most of the album. The most notable example of that relative longevity is Atomized. Seeing as that comes early in the album and is pretty representative of the albums sound, I'll link that here. Give it a listen, maybe you'll like it!

Apple Music link

Alvvays discography

I've already done a write-up on this amazing indie pop band that deserves more success (they are already pretty successful, but these guys are the best indie band right now). You can find the fruits of my obsession here!

Fall Out Boy - So Much (For) Stardust

I usually try to take the "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it" approach when it comes to talking about music, but this album disappointed me to the point of frustration, so I'm gonna get negative here. Fall Out Boy stans, you've been warned.

So, first things first, no, this album isn't dreadful. This album has turned the tide following Mania and a long wait, I won't deny that, but to me this album felt like the perfect illustration of why its so important to know when you have nothing left to say. The album is completely unremarkable. It says nothing, does nothing new, and retreads unexceptionally. It feels like they're trying to make music for the kids of the 00s that don't exist anymore. It reeks of immaturity, which would be fine if not for the fact they don't seem to be aware of it. This isn't a punkish, knowing immaturity, it's a mid-life crisis in audio form, and it makes me question whether Fall Out Boy were ever actually good in the first place or whether their earlier material is just carried by nostalgia.

Sorry Fall Out Boy fans, but I needed that. I did like Fake Out quite a bit, though, and that's stood the test of time a few weeks poses, so I'll share that here. I hope everyone else enjoys it as much as the critics appear to have done!

Apple Music link

Yves Tumor - Praise A Lord Who Chews But Which Does Not Consume; (Or Simply, Hot Between Worlds)

This experimental album from Yves Tumor is the strangest album I've heard that could still be confidently recommended to the majority of music fans. It's very formless, yet still manages to feel familiar. It's a demonstration of Yves Tumor's creativity that he can make something unlike anything else I've heard with such a singular soundscape, but still have the album be easy to get into straight away.

The only slight flaw I can think of that matters, is that it peaks quite early for me, which makes the rest of the album feel worse than the sum of its parts.

Apple Music link

Regina Spektor - Soviet Kitsch

This is one that has been on my radar for probably about a year, and I finally got around to it last month. Maybe I shouldn't have waited so long, because it didn't live up to expectation at first, but as time went on, I've appreciated this album more and more.

Regina Spektor is pretty weird. Like, all round weird. But it's a great example of why weird is not an insult. The brand-new-sentence style of lyrics in particular makes every line sound so intentional because it had to be. She's clearly digging down to the raw, abstract feelings and experiences that aren't yet translated cleanly into an earthly language, and she translates them herself, from scratch, and it becomes so personal and affecting because it's just all her, no cliches. She could say something as common as a greeting in this style and it would feel like she was the first person to say hello and really mean it. It's fantastic.

As I'm writing this, I realize that I might have enough to say about this album to justify it's own post, but that will do for this one. Give this one a listen if you like folk-leaning alternative stuff like Fiona Apple and Phoebe Bridgers. You might be disappointed, but then you won't be and you'll like it a whole lot.

Apple Music link

boygenius - the record

With the record, three very talented musicians, clever lyricists, and beautiful vocalists come together to make an album that is... Good? I mean, yeah, all those things still apply, and it is genuinely good, its not like Phoebe Bridgers, Lucy Dacus, and Julien Baker just lost all their talent completely in a few years, they aren't Green Day, but I guess I just expected more from three women who were such a large part of the popularisation of this kind of sound. It's a good album, and it's still worth a listen if you're a fan of any of the three, or of course if you liked the boygenius EP, but outside of a few fun and/or sincere moments, it felt a little arbitrary to me. Those moments are there though, and they are great, I just think maybe a second EP would be more appropriate than an album that, to me, felt like it had a lot of filler. As always though, you might have a different experience, so if you haven't heard it yet and like sad girl vibes, give it a shot!

Apple Music link

[lindsaywesker]

Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Welcome to Too Much Information Tuesday!

Obesity is now a bigger killer than malnutrition.

Everyone has three lives: a public life, a private life and a secret life.

Women tell an average of 11 lies a week. Men, 58.

A third of married Britons describe sex as a chore.

There are 19 languages on Earth with only one speaker left.

All swimmers leave traces of faecal matter in the water.

Magic mushrooms grow in the gardens of Buckingham Palace.

You should never use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.

No one born blind has ever been diagnosed with schizophrenia.

51 cars a year overshoot and drive into the canals of Amsterdam.

After the 9/11 attacks, the Maasai tribe of Kenya gave 14 of their most important cattle to America as aid.

If a man pees on a pregnancy test and it comes up positive, he may have testicular cancer.

Half of Americans believe that a British person saying something "with the greatest respect" is a compliment.

Counterfeiters in medieval Russia were punished by having their coins melted and the molten metal poured down their throats.

A smartphone contains more computing power than the whole of NASA had in 1969.

Asia has the greatest number of working children, totalling 45 million. Africa is second with 24 million.

Psychologists believe that when someone says "I need to talk to you" you automatically recall every bad thing you've done recently.

“A fit of the clevers” is 19th-century Scots for a sudden burst of activity when you realise how much work you have to do.

In 2019, there were still 17 US States where it was legal to fire someone for being gay.

At 12,000ft above sea level, there is barely enough oxygen in La Paz, Bolivia, to support combustion. The city is nearly fireproof.

The most popular song played at funerals in the UK is Monty Python's 'Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life'.

Looking at a photo of a person you love can reduce moderate pain by up to 40%, and severe pain by 15%.

In 2021, an invisible sculpture was sold for $18,030. Artist Salvatore Garau says his work should “activate the power of the imagination”.

According to the Roman writer Juvenal, one of the punishments for adultery was the insertion of a mullet in the offender’s anus.

In the reign of Queen Mary, anyone caught living idly for three days was branded with 'V' for vagrant.

When Usain Bolt ran the 100m at the 2012 Olympics, his feet only touched the ground for two seconds.

In March 2014, an Australian Python swallowed a chihuahua and found itself chained to a kennel.

The revolving door was invented by a man who hated holding doors open for women.

The colour we call ‘white’ is the frequency of light that stimulates all three sets of colour-sensitive cone cells in our retinas equally.

There is a Spanish man that is the singer in a Kajagoogoo tribute act. He's brilliant! So good in fact that, once you've seen Juan, you've seen Limahl.

Curvy women may be more intelligent than skinny women due to fatty acids in their hips that improve their mental abilities, a study found.

In the 1960s, Italian shops had a service called 'the smearing' in which they would spread Nutella on any slice of bread brought to them by a child.

The government’s flagship ‘40 New Hospitals’ policy could be scaled back, as soon as mathematicians work out how to scale something back from zero.

If a Google employee dies, their spouse gets paid half their salary for the next ten years and their children get $1000 a month until they're 19.

According to Huichol Indian tradition, men and women experienced the pain of childbirth together. Men sat in the rafters with a string attached to their testicles and women pulled the string during contractions.

In a 2008 study, researchers at Bath Spa University asked volunteers to rank the intelligence of people with various accents. A Yorkshire accent was rated highest. A Brummie accent was rated lower than staying silent.

When English author and artist Ernest Seton turned 21, his father handed him an itemised bill for everything spent on him up to that point. The total came to $537.50 and his father set the interest rate at 6%. Seton paid the debt but never spoke to his father again.

Okay, that’s enough information for one day. Have a tremendous and tumultuous Tuesday! I love you all.

[septembersghost]

DM posting a blind (fanfic lmao) that Blondie is dating Andrew

see, this, to me, is just as bad as k*ylorism, simply in a different way? tbh DM, like CDAN before her, is a plague on the internet and will post ANYTHING anyone sends her, she doesn't care about veracity whatsoever, this is the same woman who insisted for years taylor and joe were secretly married (and had a "UK ceramony [sic]"), and now she's still stirring up unfounded drama about that other dude, so there are multiple reasons why i believe this would never happen, but that said.......they'd be very cute and i love them both, so would i support two of my faves together? yes 😂 that said, reality prevails.

what is she even concluding this from lol it sounds like someone listened to WEFIL and decided to invent this. just. have they ever even been in the same vicinity? what?!

[dargeereads]

Dad's Best Friend Series

Genre: Steamy Age Gap Romance

Releasing: June 15 - 22, 2023

The Dad’s Best Friend series features deliciously forbidden steamy age gap instalove romances from bestselling authors. Perfect short romances to gobble up, with all the spice you love!

SAVED BY MY DAD'S BEST FRIEND

BY HALEY TRAVIS

With one simple favor, I fell for the sexiest woman in the world – my best friend's daughter.

Lena is gorgeous. Sweet, sensual, fascinating.

An angel who should not be staying with a much older, rough man, even if it's at her Dad's request.

Protecting Lena for a few days should solve her stalker problem.

He'll take one look at my size and back off. If he shows his face, I'll end him.

I shouldn't feel this possessive, this wild about a girl I barely know.

She's already mine.

I'll do anything to save her from her fears.

But who will save Lena from my obsession?

GOODREADS

BOOKBUB

PURCHASE LINKS

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

Free in Kindle Unlimited

MIDNIGHT SNACK

BY CHLOE MAINE

He was my first crush. But he was my dad's best friend, so he pushed me away...

Now I've done what he told me to do. I went and lived my life. I still know what I want (and it's him, no question), so I'm showing up on his doorstep late at night, knowing he won't turn me away. I may only have one night to convince him that we both need to test the wild chemistry between us. So I'm going to make myself the most irresistible, secret midnight snack he's ever been offered. And I'll have to hope that once he has a taste, he won't be able to let me go again.

ADD TO GOODREADS

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UNIVERSAL

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PROTECTING ALLIE

BY AUDREY BELL

She's the daughter of my ex-military buddy, scared, and in need of protection. When a stalker threatens to take her life, I could lose my sweet girl before I ever get the chance to make her mine.

***

Duke

When my best friend, Mickey, gets remarried and leaves to enjoy his honeymoon, he made me swear to look after his daughter, Allie. I didn’t tell him that I can’t take my eyes off her even if I tried. She’s a fully grown woman now at 25 years old but she's still thirteen years younger than me. And Mickey would bury me alive if he knew I was thinking about his daughter that way. So I keep my distance, even though it kills me to do it.

Then Allie calls me in the middle of the night, terrified. Someone is stalking her, invading her private life with threatening messages.

I will do everything in my power to keep her safe, relying on my military background to protect her. What I’m not prepared for is the way danger and adrenaline ramp up the sexual tension between us, making it impossible to deny my feelings for her.

Allie

My dad’s best friend, Duke, is like an uncle to me, buff, broody, and protective. I didn’t want to tell Dad about the stalker in the middle of his wedding plans, but I’m so grateful to have Duke watching my back.

After a close call with my stalker leaves me shaken, I find myself taking refuge in Duke’s arms. I’m not blind to the way he looks at me though. It’s more than mild fondness. He’s obsessed with me in a way he’s trying so hard to hide.

One hot, wild night is all it takes for our self-control to dissolve, tumbling between the sheets together. When I finally have Duke in my bed, I know it’s more than a temporary fling in the heat of the moment. I’m in love with my dad’s best friend forever.

What am I going to tell my dad? And now that Duke is in my life as more than just an impromptu bodyguard, will that paint a target on his back for my stalker, too?

GOODREADS

BOOKBUB

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AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

Free in Kindle Unlimited

COMING SOON IN THE SERIES

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

[sweetestlamb]

Pitiful Love

Summary: Our favorite assassin faces her fiercest opponent yet.

Author's note: If you're waiting for me to update a story just ignore this, this didn't happen it's all an illusion. 🌚🌚🌚 But honestly I tried to resist writing about these two but I couldn't fight the thoughts in my head. It's just a wee drabble, I hope anyone who writes enjoys it. I should have probably wanted until the weekend to post but I'm always too impatient once I've written something new, hopefully the two people who see this enjoy it lmaoooo.

She's finally here, beside him. Back where she had started to believe she belonged and the joy that ravaged her body as she crossed that finish line terrified her, what foolish game were they playing? She should have been more careful. She was Naksu, not Mu-deok; the blind fool who stole her soul in a comedic twist of fate, she has let this role get to her hear--her head. Only her head.

She has never had any room for such frivolous endeavors. Even her time with Seo Yul was nothing in comparison to this, they did not depend on each other nor share their weaknesses- their time together was filled with comfortable silence and no expectations. Neither asking the other for more than they were willing to give. Which was perfect as she was not willing to give anything.

A polar opposite from her relationship with a certain entitled brat, he was demanding from the moment she collided into his world. It frustrated her to no end that everything he wanted from her, he ultimately got it through sheer determination and his impeccable luck.

He had been kicked down countless times since she met him, yet he could still smile like that. Blinding her with rows of gleaming teeth that were only eclipsed by the brilliance of his eyes, those eyes that revealed too much when they should have hidden everything from someone like her.

She was still Naksu, she had no qualms about using his pitiful feelings for her own benefit. He had no business caring for someone like her.

I missed you too.

She had not missed him. They were dependent on each other that was all, it was best not to confuse these feelings of survival with something as meaningless as love.

Yet she had come running upon hearing of her drunk young master in the brothel. Once again he had done the impossible, reading that fool's love letter in a fraction of time than it took others allowing him to leave Songrim as he pleased. It was expected at this point, he was her pupil and the luckiest man she'd ever encountered.

His weight is heavy on her slimmer shoulder but she shifts him away as young master Seo tries to take him from her arms.

"I'm fine. I will take my young master home now."

"He will be a burden. I shall carry him, he's too heavy for you."

He leans forward once more and instinctively her grip tightens, she will not allow anyone to take him from her especially in this state. He needs her.

"No. I am stronger than I look, he is no heavier than the water I had to carry on my back. You should go back inside, people will start to worry about you. I will bring my master home."

That look again, filled with emotions she has no desire to decipher. So she looks away breaking his piercing prolonged eye contact.

"Good night young master."

Jang Uk is silent on her shoulder besides his drunken mumbling of her name. As soon as she takes her first step he trips on nothing and almost brings them both down.

"Aish! Why did you have to drink so much? I'm the one who passed a test all you did was read a stupid book!" She hisses at him under her breath and to her annoyance he chuckles in response, finally opening his glossy eyes.

"Mu-deok ah you were here?!"

If they were not in the street with so many witnesses she would have dropped him where he stood.

"I swear one day I will kill you."

Their journey home is not one of ease but she is the fiercesome assassin Naksu, she will not be overcome by one drunk idiot.

As soon as she reaches his chambers she dumps him unceremoniously on his sleeping blankets. His cry of pain is music to her ears.

"Mu-deok! That hurt, my head is throbbing. Can't you be more gentle?"

She glares at him vehemently before kicking him in the thigh.

"Hey!"

"Stop your whining, I barely hit you."

He looks so pitiful on the floor rubbing his leg where she kicked that she almost feels guilty. Almost.

"Stop drinking so much." She says with finality before bowing, ready to take her leave.

"Wait."

She shouldn't wait. He's reckless enough while sober who knows what he might say intoxicated? She shouldn't take the risk.

But her feet are frozen. Despite the screaming in her head.

Walk. Move damn it. Go!

"Why didn't you meet me there as I asked? I wanted to celebrate you passing your test."

Because she felt pathetic. She had fought so hard to be by his side without realizing how much she was exposing to him and possibly others.

They could never be together. That was fact. He was destined to marry the lying Jinyowon brat or the clearly infatuated healer's granddaughter, there was no space in his life for her. Not as Mu-deok or Naksu.

"I wanted to be alone. You seemed fine without me."

She had seen him earlier surrounded by his friends his glee palpable even across room. But there were another pair of eyes softly gazing at her master, and then she'd crossed that space and he had turned that blinding smile in her direction. That smile that she thought had been designated for her eyes only.

"I'm never fine without you. Don't you know that by now? Why are you trying to put this distance between us huh?"

He's swaying sporadically his scarlet cheeks blazing but she's certain it's not from any embarrassment at his declaration.

"Because you have forgetten what this is."

She had forgotten too, foolishly.

His eyes narrow into dangerous slits, his jaw clenching tightly at her harsh tone.

"And what is this?"

He lays his palm flat on the floor pushing himself to his full height, towering over her as he awaits her reply.

"A busines-"

"You're a coward."

That stops in her tracks. Her own callous words thrown back in her face, she glares at him refusing to let the moisture in her eyes leak and break her resolve.

"You're not only my master, or my maid. This isn't just a business deal not anymore, not to me. I think about you day and night Mu-deok, do you know what that's like? To not be able to control my thoughts? Or my heart? I didn't ask for this, but you can't run away from this and pretend I'm the only one feeling this."

She blinks hard, fist clenched at her sides. This demanding asshole, he never listens to her unless his life is on the line. One day she'll kill him, that's a promise.

"Naksu."

He stares at her blankly. Then clarity shines in those expressive eyes.

"I never knew it bothered you."

"It doesn't.... It didn't. But you're saying those things and using her name. Would you still feel this way if she regained her body? Is this body so beautiful that your feelings wouldn't change regardless of who inhabits-"

"Naksu. My heart belongs to Naksu. Only Naksu."

Thump.

Without any thought her hand moves and clutches at her chest.

His answering smirk makes her want to disappear.

"What? Did your heart skip a beat? Did I make your heart flutter like the wings of a butterfly?"

"Shut up." She hates that she can feel heat blossoming on her face. It's all because of this weak body.

"Don't spend too much alone with Seo Yul."

She's caught off guard by the weird request so much so she doesn't immediately respond making Jang Uk start to squirm his discomfort too apparent.

"What? Is that too difficult for you? Am I asking too much?"

"No. It's just stupid, whether or not I spend time alone with him nothing will change. You spend time with other women, are your feelings changing in their presence?"

He stares at her before grinning.

"Not at all. They mean nothing to me."

"Then don't make idiotic demands like that again."

She wants to look away but she can't tear her gaze away from his, it feels like being caught in the eye of a storm her insides are rattling but she can't escape. With her defences down, he steps forward invading her personal space as he's wont to do.

"I want to do something stupid."

She gasps as he further closes the space between them, those long legs easily eating up the necessary distance she created for her sanity.

His hand is sweltering on her already burning cheek.

I need to pull away.

But she closes her eyes, leaning into his huge palm her resistance tearing at the seams.

"Open your eyes. Look at me, Naksu."

She must be a pervert because hearing her name on his tongue does something to her insides, she's never felt attraction towards anyone before him. Never wanted to kiss someone or rip their clothes off and feel their skin on her own, see them panting beneath her the way she only heard about in lewd bar stories.

Not until him.

"When we are alone, I will call you that. Do you like that?"

His thumb brushes across her lips and she can't stop her mouth from falling open in anticipation.

He pulls at her bottom lip, eyes captivated by the movement of his own finger and she uses her last reservoir of control to pull away.

"What do you think you're doing to me?"

"Will you give me permission to do what I want?"

His eyes are darker than she's ever seen him, unknown emotions swirling through the rich deep orbs.

"Naksu. Please, don't push me away anymore."

She's never been conquered before, not by mages that sought to end her life or her emotions as she grew up alone without anyone to call her own. Every battle she has fought she has won, defeat is foreign to her and that was the way she wanted to live all her life.

Until him.

Giving him her heart doesn't sound like a concession because she will receive his in return. Nobody has ever given her their heart before, none would dare get this close to her.

In the end, he was the one to use her feelings for him.

"We shouldn't do this. Nobody will approve."

"We are the only ones who get to decide that. Nobody else has a say in what we do, I will break any rules if it means I get to be with you."

"I will be nothing like the other women who want you. I will not change merely because we are involved, I will still be selfish and put myself first. Are you sure you can handle that?"

"You wouldn't be my Naksu if you were not like that."

My Naksu.

"Fine. I'm not that good of a person to not take what I want. If you suffer because of me, that's not my fault anymore."

This time she's the one to pull him closer, arms firm around his waist as she tugs him near leaning up onto the tips of her toes with only one goal in mind.

Her first kiss.

His pure look of shock is cemented in her mind as their faces draw closer, his warm breathe washing over her face alcohol still lingering in the air.

This time when he cradles her face she doesn't resist, letting him gently turn her head as his eyes sweep over her face before landing on her lips with clear intention.

She closes her eyes and lets herself free fall with no plan or escape route in mind.

His lips are even better than she imagined, than she dreamed at nights. Too soft and full, covering her own in a way that belies practice. She pushes away her jealousy refusing to let any stray thoughts invade this moment.

After a long moment of fevered presses and a light swipe of his tongue against the seam of her mouth she tries to move away, feeling light headed but he draws her closer wrapping one arm around her waist as the other one delves into her hair holding her head firmly in place.

"You said I could do what I want. I want more."

Erotic images instantly flood her mind, and she gasps looking at him with hesitant passion.

"Don't look at me like that. I only meant more kissing but if you appear so eager and willing I will not be able to control myself."

She might be a virgin but she's no blushing one.

"What if I wanted to do more? Are you truly strong enough to control yourself?"

They both stare at each other, challenge charging the air.

"Don't say things you don't mean."

"I don't. I only say things I mean."

She peers into his eyes before reaching down to her own robe, watching him as she begins to loosen it feeling powerful in a way she hasn't since she lost her energy and skill as Naksu.

"Young master? Did you return safely?"

They both jump at the new voice and before he can say anything to her she's already moving, tightening her robe and hoisting herself out of his window.

Maidservant Kim enters seconds later, but she can barely hear a word of their conversation over the thunderous pounding of her heart.

What had she done?

[s-sputnik-k]

I'm asking about the plastic tupperware 👀👀

CW: anxiety

SO I'll try to keep this short but there's so much I wanna talk about skdhdsh

Me, my mum and my sibling were lucky enough to get VIP to Blind Channel in the UK last week. We've actually met them before as we got into them at the start of 2018, around the time when Alone Against All came out, because I remember my mum showing it to us and being like, isn't this band good! isn't he cute! About Niko and at the time we were just like. Mum it's just a dude in a hat.

But now he's our dude in a hat and we love Blind Channel!

So ye we met them in late 2018 when they supported All That Remains and Sevendust, it was mad because they literally just stood at the merch stand of a really small venue, there was barely anyone interested in talking to them so we got sooo lucky. Joel came out to the merch stand late, his hair wet presumably after a shower, and my nan (for some reason we brought out nan to the gig, we love her tho) was like "Have you been sleeping?" and he just looked so confused, and was like, "No... I had a shower..."

That isn't really relevant to the story but it's kind of a family inside joke sjfhsh

So ofc, we were so excited when they got awards in Finland, we waited on the results of UMK and watched Eurovision despite it not being our normal family tradition, because we loved Blind Channel and could not BELIEVE that the guys my mum befriended on Instagram back in 2018 were doing all of this. I also didn't notice until I watched Dark Side come out that Aleksi was in the band skfhssh I'm so unobservant I thought they were just mates (my mum hasn't talked to Niko on Insta in ages btw so I'm not gonna claim to actually know the members loll but put it this way, at the time I spoke more to Niko through my mum than I did to my uncles)

So that brings me to most recently where we got VIP tickets, including meet and greet, to the Birmingham show on their European tour. And I was wondering what the hell to give them as a gift.

(dw this is relevant) I met a cute Scottish band called Single By Sunday a while back and gave them origami cranes matching their hair colours (idk if the band is still together but they're really cool dudes!) and the crane thing was kinda personal to me because they were one of my first healthy coping mechanisms, where I would make those to calm down back in primary school. And they're also meant to bring good luck, I don't really believe in luck but it's a nice sentiment.

So I spent an hour every day for the past week or so customising and folding these delicate little things:

They have the logo in the middle, and they say blind channel one way and their names the other way.

And now we get the story of the tupperware:

Ofc they're delicate little things and I wanted to protect them so my brother suggested put them in a container. I tried to find the container that was the least pasta sauce-stained.

So, it's Saturday afternoon, we got up super early to get the coach to Birmingham, we walked around grand central and bought a big plush pig from a plush shop and called him Porko. More on him later skfhs he's his own story tbh

So we got into our outfits at the hotel and headed to the venue, and we got let in for VIP by none other than... Santeri, the tour manager (I think) who I actually had no idea who he was up until the previous Wednesday, I'd just seen his face in videos a few times before then, but my mum pointed him out to me at the Manchester gig.

So, Saturday. I was shaking so bad when the band came in skdhdhs I haven't shaken that bad in a while lmao. Felt so funny holding a little tub while I was shaking like a madman.

Santeri was funny that day anyway, pretty sure he asked us to please be orderly because he was hungover, lmao

My sibling gave Joonas the pig plush, if you saw the video on their story recently of Olli and Joonas throwing a big plush against a wall backstage, that's the pig we gave them skdhdsh

So then it was my turn. I think I was last in the line to get a picture, not that I would have noticed, I felt like I had tunnel vision I was so nervous skdhss. So I tried to do the whole thing I'd practiced, it was so awkward because I was holding like so many things, with the tub and the lid and trying to get my phone on the camera app to hand to Santeri (he was taking all the pictures on our phones), and trying to hand out the cranes at the same time.

So ye I went down the line handing them out, until I got to Joel, and only him and Olli were left, and there was one crane left in the box, which was Olli's

Considering the vivid memory I have of that feeling of panic, I'm surprised I didn't cry on the spot lmao.

I just stared at Joel and the box for like TEN SECONDS STRAIGHT skfhshdb I had no idea what to do, I was trying to think out a way to explain something that I had no idea how it happened, only to have Santeri come over and hand a crane to Joel.

Took me like another 10 seconds to process what the hell happened, I was so confused until after jsjjfsh

So after that I got to Olli fine, gave him his crane and told him I still play bass after he told me last time that us bassists have to stick together :} I love him sm fr sjfhsh

So ye and I was dying so much after the whole cranes connundrum that I almost had my picture taken holding tupperware, luckily my sibling snatched it out my hands before Santeri took the pictures dkfhsh

Also, Santeri is rlly nice like, they were on overtime and he let me get Aleksi to sign the back of my jacket since he wasn't in the band last time I met them

But that doesn't mean he didn't give me a heart attack and a half lmao, my mum explained to me that while I was having my 'tunnel vision' moment, Santeri had taken Joel's crane from the tub (I'm still amazed at how I literally didn't see that happen) to look at it because he was curious

And then while they were packing up after the VIP, Santeri had his hands full of all the gifts (he held Porko the pig at arms length away for some reason djdkdsj which we found hilarious), was struggling to hold all these delicate little cranes, so we offered him the tub, and he was like "are you sure? Are you sure you really don't need it?" And we were like, ye take it!! We don't mind

So ye, that's the long-winded story of how giving blind channel origami cranes was both a nightmare and a dream come true, and how we gave Santeri the tupperware that was almost in my picture with Blind Channel

This probably isn't as wild to others as it is to me because it was literally 2 days ago and I'm still so excited sjdhsdh and Santeri is an icon and a meme for us now skdhsb

[mountswhore]

𝐝𝐨𝐞 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 — jesse lingard

summary: jesse was afraid to lose you, but you have to reassure him that his money and fame mean nothing to you.

notes: requests are open, ask away!

for @bite-me-en-la-boca

Jesse was afraid to lose you, as simple as that. He wasn’t blind to the double takes people do when you walk past them, or the comments from men at the club when they pass. You were stunning — and Jesse knew that, along with everyone else.

Even his own friends would make little comments, obviously they knew they wouldn’t act on it, so did he, but his girlfriend was wanted by even his closest mates. It definitely made him hold onto you a little tighter. Whenever you’d visit him at training, or go to an event with him, he’d keep you close and constantly shower you in affection, so everybody knew you were his.

The Instagram comments were the worst, not only would his be littered with ‘she’s fit’ or ‘lucky man’, but yours were so vivid that you’d refuse to open them. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t scroll through them every once in a while to see what people were saying, only to return to you a while later with a heavy heart.

The whole of the UK male population were after you, which is why tonight was the worst for Jesse. You were celebrating Marcus’ birthday, and it was completely unlike him to want to go clubbing, but you both agreed anyway.

Jesse watched with a sick feeling in his stomach, almost feeling the need to grab his phone and text his best friend that he was too sick to go. And keep you at home. He knew what tonight would be like, he knew that someone would make a comment, or give you a suggestive glance, and it would ruin his night.

“How do I look?” You asked, smiling innocently up at your boyfriend. Even with heels on, he towered over you. Jesse pushed his negative thoughts to the side to compliment you.

“Wow. Where’s Y/N gone?” He asked, holding your hand and twirling you around slowly. You met his eyes once again with a pout, and Jesse kissed it away. There was never a day he didn’t compliment you on your beauty.

“Real funny. Are you ready?”

“Do I look ready?” Jesse countered, standing back from you and showing off his smart casual attire. You laughed and smoothed the fabric of his shirt down, smiling up at him. He looked back down at you with so much love in his eyes, you’d forget he was hiding his intrusive thoughts behind those eyes.

The pair of you left, getting an Uber to the club you were supposed to arrive at 20 minutes ago. Marcus was waiting inside, sitting in a booth with a few other United boys. The second Marcus spotted you, he moved out of the booth to greet you both.

“Jess,” Marcus spoke, pulling his best friend into a hug, “how’ve you been?”

Jesse just nodded, watching his attention divert from him to you. He squeezed you tightly and almost lifted you from your feet. He knew Marcus would never betray him like that, no matter how hot you were. He trusted Marcus entirely, but it was just adding fuel to the fire. Jesse felt tense from the moment he entered the club, the boys greeting you and having a laugh with you. It was off-putting, he just wanted to go home and watch your rubbish tv. He’d sit through hours of it if it meant you weren’t here getting preyed on.

Throughout the night, you’d had shot after shot, begging Jesse to dance with you an hour in. And he was keeping you close to him, eyes watching intently as you swayed your hips onto him. Your eyes were on him the entire time, not paying mind to the people around you. Jesse so badly wanted to enjoy this moment with you, but those eyes surrounding you were slowly pushing him over the edge.

“What the fuck are you staring at?” He snapped, causing a small space to form between the pair of you. You stepped back in shock, staring at your boyfriend who angrily stared at the people surrounding you.

His eyes had found yours again, but you were gone. You’d approached the booth Marcus was sitting at, wedging between him and Jadon, a frown on your face.

“What happened, Y/N?” Marcus questioned, an arm around your shoulder as you looked visibly upset. You saw Jesse sat at the bar now, head in his hands with a drink in front of him.

“He just shouted in front of everyone, it’s so embarrassing.” You stated, folding your arms and stealing a drink from the table. You didn’t know who the victim of the stolen drink was, quite frankly, you didn’t care. Jesse had bursted his anger in front of everyone, and even though it wasn’t directed at you, it still embarrassed you.

The next half hour was torture, you were slowly losing your buzz and the night was becoming boring. You were sandwiched between the two boys, and they refused to let you have any more drinks. Jesse was still sulking at the bar, but you didn’t care. You’d let him sulk there for the remainder of the evening, if need be.

“Guys, I think I might head home,” you mentioned, standing up and wiggling over the line of boys, “I’m super tired now.” You waved sweetly at Marcus, wishing him one more ‘happy birthday’ before you were leaning against the wall and waiting for your Uber.

Jesse looked back at the booth, wondering which boy had an arm around you this time, but you were gone. The space between Marcus and Jadon that you occupied had now disappeared. His eyes frantically searched the dance floor, but you were nowhere to be seen. It was only then that he started to regret shouting. He could lie and say he didn’t know what came over him, but he did know. He was jealous.

“She’s gone home.” Marcus spoke into his friend’s ear, patting him on the shoulder. It eased Jesse’s thoughts a little, but he still felt horrible. Jesse had gotten an Uber home not long after you, finding the house completely dark apart from your shared bedroom.

You were tucked into bed, Netflix in the background as you scrolled through your phone. You could see Jesse standing in the doorway, but didn’t acknowledge him as he walked in and sat on your side of the bed. His hand rested on the lump in the duvet that was your leg, waiting for you to say something. But you didn’t.

“I’m sorry.” He blurted out, his voice soft with guilt. You didn’t even react, you just kept scrolling. “Really, I am. I’m sorry for ruining your night.”

“It’s done now, you need to go to bed. You have Hope tomorrow.” You replied, a lack of emotion in your voice. He knew you loved when Hope was round, the pair of you got on immensely. But you seemed bored now. Bored of listening to him. You had gotten out of bed and left the room, wandering downstairs to distract yourself with something else.

“It’s not done, babe.” Jesse spoke, following your footsteps as you turned into the kitchen. You stood at the counter, grabbing a coffee pod from your cupboard and beginning to make yourself a coffee.

“What else do you want to say, Jesse?” You argued calmly, Jesse almost jumping at the mention of his name. It was always silly pet names, never his name. He could see by the look on your face that you were over this, you were tired, grumpy, getting slightly hungover.

“I know I should never have shouted like that, in front of everyone,” he spluttered, alcohol still in his system. His words were not stringing together very well, which presented a bad case on his behalf, “the last thing I wanted to do was hurt you because of my own insecurities.”

Jesse wasn’t the type to show his insecurities to anyone, not even you at times, but you knew they were there. He was stuck in the mindset of sweeping them away, out of sight and out of mind. You wanted to badly to help him work through them like he did with yours, but he’d never disclose what was bothering him. You turned to look at him, the argument long forgotten now as you wanted this to be the chance he finally opens up.

“What insecurities, Jess?” You wondered, slowly approaching him. Your small hands held his cheeks, you could’ve sworn you’d seen a glint in his eyes.

He shook his head, the window now closed. The opportunity for the pair of you to sit down and talk about what bothered him, it was gone. You were back to pretending not to see his tensed jaw and white knuckles from squeezing his fist together. You sat at the island in defeat, your headache prominent now.

Jesse’s hand fell upon your shoulder, your eyes meeting once again. Your face contorted as a tear fell from your eye, Jesse now going into full on panic mode. He sat beside you, pulling you into his chest and holding you close. You could hear his heart pounding in his chest, you weren’t the only one who wished he could say how he felt.

“How are we ever going to move forward together if I don’t know how you’re feeling?” You asked honestly, holding his bare arm and pulling it close to you. There would always be this barricade stopping you from moving forward, his insecurities stopping you both from being able to talk to each other.

Jesse pulled away from you, his fingers fiddling with the expensive ring on your finger. He’d gifted it to you on your two-year anniversary, it was a beautiful night. “I just get jealous. I see your Instagram comments, and mine. I see the way random men look at you on the street, in the club, in the fucking supermarket. Even the boys are always complimenting you, being touchy with you. It might sound stupid and it might seem like it’s nothing, but it makes me fucking jealous.”

“You know I’d never do that to you,” you turned to Jesse, now clutching his hand tightly, “you’re the only one I want.”

“I know that, love. I have been fucked around before, girls always go after my money and my name. You don’t even shoo these boys away. It’s like you enjoy their attention.” Jesse accused, his tone still soft with you. He never raises his voice with you, and you never have with him.

This comment hurt you, your waterline burned with tears once again, hearing your boyfriend even fathom these ideas. “I don’t pay these boys any mind. You’re the only one I want attention from, I barely give the rest of them a second glance. And I’m sorry that your friends are touchy with me, I just give them lots of hugs and squeezes because they’re your friends, I want them to like me. I know how important they are to you. So they’re important to me.”

Even though Jesse thought you liked the attention, and wanted him for his name and wealth, even though it deeply pained you for him to think these things of you, you kept it cool. He was hurting, these were his insecurities. You looked up at him, giving him your infamous doe eyes, the ones he fell for in the first place.

“If I only wanted you for your wealth and name, I wouldn’t bother with Hope. I love that girl, she’s my best friend. I’d do anything for her,” Jesse smiled at your comment, his hand smoothing over your cheek, “I wouldn’t bother with your family, I wouldn’t call them up everyday asking how they are. I wouldn’t bother with your career, making sure your training kit is washed and you have appropriate lunch.” You emphasised the word appropriate, as Jesse would sometimes leave with just one of Hope’s lunchables, or just a yoghurt.

Jesse let out a laugh, both hands now holding your face close to his. “Thank you. I’m sorry for doubting you.”

“I won’t take your name when we get married, just to prove that I’m not in it for fame and wealth,” you admitted, a smile on your face, “I don’t know how you do it if I’m honest, you can’t even walk around the shop without someone approaching you. It’d get on my nerves.”

“Of course you’re gonna take my name,” Jesse cooed, kissing the bridge of your nose and looking down at you once more, “and you better get used to it, because I’m not giving you up.” He held you tight to him, the both of you still reeking of alcohol and the coffee long forgotten.

[cali-holland]

Under the Stars- Tom Holland One Shot

Pairing: Tom Holland X Reader

Prompt: When you invite Tom and Harrison to go to a cabin in the woods with your old college friends, Tom devises a plan to finally confess his feelings for you. Little does he know, the cabin belongs to your ex-boyfriend, and he’s also seeking your attention this week.

Word Count: 12k

Warnings: slow burn (ish), swearing, sexual themes (jokes/references), the reader kinda gets sexually harassed (nothing actually happens), fist fight + some blood, tom being a simp

A/N: this was a nine month process, so i hope you enjoy :) also thank you to @duskholland​ for being so supportive and reading through this fic and editing it. love you hannah! + Also reposting this because the tags didn’t work the first time :/ and tag list will be in a reblog!

Masterlist   Tom Holland Masterlist

*Moodboard is mine, pics used are not *

~~~

When you walked into Tom and Harrison’s house, you weren’t expecting to hear odd grunts coming from the living room. You’d heard many strange noises made in that house— a good amount of their sources were still unknown, but you’d never heard such aggressive grunts. For a moment, you considered slowly backing out of the house and knocking on the door. It would be easy to pretend like you didn’t have a key so you didn’t have to walk in on anyone doing anything gross in the other room.

But then Harrison walked into the entryway, smiling at you as a greeting, “Hey, Y/N.”

“Hey,” You replied, closing the front door hesitantly behind you. You pointed towards the living room, “Do I wanna know what’s going on in there?”

Before he could reply, there was a loud bang from the living room, followed by a string of curses. Forgetting all worries of what may or may not have been the cause of the noises, you hurried into the other room with Harrison trailing behind you.

Tom laid on the floor, groaning in pain as he clutched his foot. Tessa, who had been checking up on her owner, popped up happily when she saw you, rushing over to greet you at your feet. Tom looked up at you and Harrison in the door, forcing out his best smile. You stared at the large tent that was currently taking up most of the space in the living room, questioningly.

“Why do you have a tent set up?” You asked. Tom hopped up off the floor, standing beside the tent.

“Well, our camping trip is this weekend, so I thought I’d make sure it’s still durable.” Tom said proudly. He put a hand against the tent in an attempt to be smooth, but the tent came collapsing down, making Tessa bolt behind you from the sudden loud noise.

“And he wanted to make sure he could actually set up a tent, which clearly he can’t,” Harrison stated, and Tom glared at him in response.

“Were you going to tell him?” You laughed, turning to the blond beside you.

“And miss the opportunity to see him struggle setting up a tent for forty minutes? No, I didn’t tell him.” He smirked, only making Tom more frustrated and embarrassed.

“Tom, it’s a cabin. You don’t need a tent unless you don’t want to stay with everyone else.” You explained. “I just said camping because it’s easier to call it that.”

“Fuck you, mate.” He grumbled to Harrison, flipping him off before starting to put away the mess of a tent. You stepped in to help him, and Harrison just laughed to himself before leaving.

“I really thought you would’ve known. Did you really think I’d invite you and Harrison to spend several days in the woods with me and my college friends in tents?” You joked, “Besides, I didn’t think you’d come if it was actual camping.”

Tom paused his movements, but you continued to undo the poles, taking no notice of his action, “Why wouldn’t I go if it was actual camping?”

“I don’t know.” You shrugged, looking at him with your usual charming smile, “You’re not the outdoorsy, camping type. You don’t exactly go out and rough it in the woods on the weekend, like Will or Tyler; you play golf with Harrison and your dad.”

While your words were well-intended and teasing, Tom couldn’t help but take them to heart. He took everything you said to heart.

It was hard for him to be so helplessly in love with you, his best friend (besides Harrison) from BRIT school, for the past few years while you were completely blind to it. Normally, he’d do little things to impress you because he still wasn’t sure if he wanted you to know about his feelings— if you knew, there was a chance you’d reject him, and Tom wouldn’t know what to do with himself if that happened. Recently though, he’s started to feel like his heart was going to explode if he didn’t tell you soon, but that didn’t mean he knew how to tell you.

So when you asked if he wanted to go on a camping trip with you, of course he said yes right away. His mind told him that, no, he really wasn’t the outdoorsy, “roughing it” kind of guy, but his heart told him it was a chance with you. He was a sap and thought that maybe he’d pluck up the courage to tell you how he felt under a moonlit campsite, maybe even the two of you could share a tent, maybe he could kiss you in the lake— god, did he want to kiss you.

That had all come crashing down when he’d realized it wasn’t a romantic camping getaway. You’d invited Harrison and a few college friends, friends that neither Tom nor Harrison had ever met. And there was one friend in particular who Tom never wanted to meet— Will, your ex-boyfriend. You two ended things mutually, but Tom couldn’t stop himself from feeling like he needed to compete against Will, especially when he discovered it was Will whose family owned the land you’d be camping on; Will who took you on hikes all around your college town; Will who taught you how to fish and how to kayak with the lakes nearby; Will who one time got bitten by a rattlesnake and sucked out the venom himself; Will who could climb any mountain and come back unscathed. Will was an outdoorsy “roughing it” badass fucker that Tom despised.

And now, you had just furthered proved that Tom was a delicate flower compared to the lumberjack prick that was Will. He didn’t care about being compared to Will’s best friend, Tyler, who (from what you’d told Tom) was in a serious relationship with your other friend, Jane. Besides Jane, the other person accompanying you all to the cabin was Rose, your best friend and Will’s sister. Needless to say, Tom was very grateful that Harrison was coming along too— he didn’t think he could handle a Will-centered week alone.

“We can just leave this for now. I know I promised you Nando’s before we leave.” Tom said, getting up from his spot on the floor.

“Are you sure? We can just get it on the way to the airport.” You said, looking at the tent mess before you.

“Come on, it’ll be fine.” He held a hand out to you and you took it, so that he could pull you up. Before you two could make it out the door, Harrison arrived downstairs with a loaded hiking backpack in hand.

“I know you’re not trying to sneak to Nando’s without me.” He said, and Tom glared at him from behind your back. Harrison was very well aware of Tom’s feelings for you— everyone was except for you, and he took every chance he could get at being a little shit about it, which included ruining quality time for Tom to spend with you.

The three of you left to grab your last meal in the UK before heading back to their house. Tom finished putting away the tent, and Harrison loaded up Harry’s car with your bags as well as his and Tom’s. Harry (through bribery from Tom) drove you all to the airport for the first step in your camping trip.

Since you went to school in the US, all of your friends would be meeting you across the pond. Will’s family cabin was located in Maine, so the flight wasn’t too bad for the three of you— though Tom wished it was longer so he could devise a more accurate plan to impress you this weekend. He had to prove that he could be the outdoorsy badass guy you wanted. He had to outcompete Will.

“Why would you have to outcompete him?” Harrison asked Tom after hearing his dilemma. Fortunately, you were getting the rental car for the three of you to make it to the cabin.

“Because it’s clearly a competition.” Tom stated, nervously fidgeting with his fingers as he looked over at you across the way. “She told me I’m not outdoorsy like Will- that makes it a competition and I have to beat him.”

As much as Harrison loved to see his friend fail at keeping it together around you, something felt wrong about telling him, ‘yeah, it’s totally a competition, so go beat up her lumberjack ex’. Instead, he tried, “I don’t think that’s what Y/N meant. You do golf more than you go camping.”

But Tom took no notice of his advice, “Just watch. I’m going to be the manliest man this weekend.”

“Hey guys,” You smiled, coming up to them, making Tom jump very unmanly-like in the process. “You ready to go?”

The journey to the cabin was a fairly long one. After a couple of hours of driving, you parked the car in one of those reserved parking lots off the side of the road. Tom and Harrison both looked around in confusion, spotting nothing but trees and a gas station.

“Why are we stopped?” Tom asked you as you got out of the car. Tom and Harrison followed you out of the car.

“We gotta hike in.” You replied. “The cabin’s down by the lake, so there’s no actual road to get there. It’s only about a mile and a half hike in. Be ready for lots of hiking. I think tomorrow we’re going to hike 12 miles.”

By the time you three got to the little a-frame cabin, it was already dinner time, which was great because that meant you three could sleep soon. The five hour time difference was already starting to hit. Before you could even step inside the cabin, your best friend met you with a bone-crushing hug.

“You’re here!” Rose smiled, stepping out of the hug after a moment.

“We made it.” You laughed. Your other friend, Jane, stepped up next to hug you. “I missed you two so much.”

“We missed you too.” Jane replied. You caught their eyes trailing over to Tom and Harrison behind you, and you remembered that they hadn’t met before. 

“Oh, girls, this is Tom and Harrison; guys, this is Rose and Jane.” You introduced the two parties with a smile. After a polite exchanging of handshakes, you looked at the two girls curiously, “Where are the boys?”

“Will wanted to get in a light swim before dinner.” Rose laughed, and Jane made her way back to the kitchen. “Come on, I’ll show you your rooms.”

Rose gave the three of you a little tour of the cabin. The front door had placed you all in a little entryway room with a simple, wooden staircase taking up most of the room; a fireplace sat beside the stairs with a small loveseat across from it. Besides a rather large bookshelf, it was relatively empty, but elegantly simple nonetheless. There were four doors downstairs, all intricately designed with the same light wood color as the stairs. The first door on the left was explained to be Will’s room, and the second was Tyler and Jane’s. The third stood as the main bathroom, as Rose described it. The fourth door led to Tom and Harrison’s room.

It wasn’t very big— neither of the rooms were according to Rose, but that was the a-frame style of a quaint log cabin. A bunk bed sat on the side of the room with a small wood dresser across from it. There was enough space for the two boys to coexist, and Tom was just grateful he didn’t have to bunk with Will of all people; he was glad he had his best friend with him.

The upstairs of the cabin held the open space of the kitchen and the main living room. With large glass windows covering one of the walls, the living room had a magnificent view of the woods outside, and three couches were set in place to overlook it. Under the couches sat a large bear rug, one which both Tom and Harrison eyed suspiciously at first before Rose laughed it off, reassuring them that it was fake. Behind the couches, the dining room was situated beneath a beautiful antler chandelier and set for eight places, completing the rustic vibe of the cabin. The kitchen, while it was small, seemed to be just as well put together as the rest of the cabin, complete with a breakfast bar. The smell of Jane’s favorite lemon salmon filled the air, making you even more excited for dinner.

Next was your own room, which was just past the kitchen. A queen bed was pushed in a nook with only the foot of the bed accessible. Unlike Tom and Harrison, you and Rose didn’t mind sharing a bed, which is why they got the smallest room downstairs. Right beside your bedroom door was another bathroom.

“You brought stuff for s’mores, right?” You asked Rose as you walked with her, Tom, and Harrison off the cabin’s porch to the nearby shed where they kept all of their hiking and lake gear.

“Yes, absolutely!” She eagerly replied, a happy skip in her step.

“S’mores are a real thing?” Tom questioned in disbelief.

“Of course! You can’t camp without—” You let out a shriek as you felt cold, wet arms wrap around your waist, picking you up and spinning you around. You laughed, immediately knowing it was Will. “Oh my god, Will! Put me down! You’re all wet.”

Will chuckled, setting you back down on the solid ground, “Well, if it gets you wet.”

“Fuck off.” You scoffed, smacking his chest playfully. It was then that you realized he was shirtless— shirtless and dripping wet from the lake and gloriously tan and somehow more built than the last time you saw him. Tyler, on the other hand, was still Tyler; still an attractive young guy, but not attractive to you and that most likely has to do with him dating Jane for as long as you’ve known him.

“Ty!” You smiled, hugging him tightly, not even caring if your clothes got wet and gross anymore. You’d just change later when you could.

Tom straightened up a bit, already feeling uneasy about Will’s presence. Will looked like the lovechild of Zac Efron and Chris Evans, with a hint of Scott Eastwood; he was perfect, there was nothing wrong with him. It made Tom question why you two broke up. Even though Tom knew you’d said it was mutual, he also knew it took a lot for girls to walk away from guys that look like that. Meanwhile, Harrison just bit his lip to keep from commenting on his friend’s ridiculous territorial issues. 

“So, you two must be Tom and Harrison.” Will held out a hand to them, smiling politely. Tom took his hand, trying to subtly shake it sternly as if to prove he was better than Will— childish, Tom knew it, but he already hated this guy with his six pack abs and perfectly white smile. Will didn’t back down though, squeezing Tom’s hand equally as hard. Noticing both guys tensing up, you looked between them awkwardly, having never seen either of them put on the tough guy act.

With introductions out of the way, you all trekked back inside the cabin. While Will, Tyler, and even you changed into dry clothes, Rose helped Jane finish dinner, leaving Tom to frustratedly rant to Harrison in their room.

“God, he’s so annoying.” Tom scoffed.

“He said two words to you.” Harrison stated, “Try to play nice. I don’t think Y/N wants you two to keep having a ‘my dick’s bigger’ contest.”

“But mine is and I know it!” He exclaimed, before realizing he didn’t know how thin the walls were- and how odd that implication was, “Whatever. He’s stupid. This trip’s stupid.”

Harrison was too busy laughing  to even attempt a response to his friend. Instead, there was a knock on the door, pulling both of them from their conversation. Tom opened the door and immediately softened when he saw you, clad in one of his old sweatshirts that he didn’t even realize you still had. It gave him a sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe, he didn’t need to worry that much about Will this week.

“Nice shirt.” Tom commented with a smile.

“Thanks,” You smiled back, “I’ve actually been meaning to give it back to you.”

“What? Why?”

“Is dinner ready?” Harrison asked, cutting off the two of you and reminding you both of his presence. As if on cue, his stomach growled loudly.

“Yes, it is.” You laughed, almost embarrassed from forgetting why you had been at their door in the first place. You tugged on Tom’s hand, pulling him out of the room. Harrison grumbled something dejectedly, but you paid no mind to it. Tom sent his friend an apologetic look, though he made no attempt to make Harrison any less of the unofficial third wheel on the journey upstairs to the dinner table.

It didn’t go unnoticed by Tom how you sat beside Will, even if Tom got the free seat beside you. Harrison slipped into the seat next to him with Rose to his right. The dinner of salmon with potatoes, salad, and bread seemed simple enough, but it was still quite possibly the best fish you’d ever had.

“Did you get a bone?” You asked Tom, seeing him awkwardly moving his mouth like his tongue was fishing out a hard piece of salmon. Blushing from you calling attention to his struggle, he held up a napkin to cover his mouth, trying to spit out the bone without it looking too gross.

“Yeah,” He admitted sheepishly, muffled by the napkin.

“I thought you got them all out.” Jane said, looking at Tyler expectantly.

“Don’t look at me, that was Will’s job.” Tyler laughed as he used his friend as the scapegoat.

“Must’ve missed one.” Will shrugged, before joking, “You’re still welcome that I caught these.”

“You caught this salmon?” You said, “I thought you only did catch and release?”

“I still do, for the most part, but this salmon was too good of an opportunity to pass up.” He explained. Tom was already boiling with embarrassment, and now he had jealousy bubbling over- of course this perfect fish was caught by the perfect outdoor man beside you.

“So, Tom, Harrison, we were talking about going for a run around the lake tomorrow morning. Want to come?” Tyler asked.

“Sure. How far?” Harrison replied, and Tom nodded in agreement.

“The loop’s about five miles.” Will answered.

“Are you going to run with us?” Tom asked you, knowing back home in Kingston you’d sometimes join Harrison on runs. Tom wasn’t the type to just go out for a casual run like his best friend was, but he wasn’t about to back down from this.

“Nah, you two can keep up with the cross country runners.” You joked, “I’d much rather save my energy for the hike.”

Once dinner ended and no one choked on any more fishbones, you all migrated to the couches. Much to Tom’s chagrin, you sat in the middle couch between Will and Rose, while Tom and Harrison sat on the couch opposite a very cuddled up Jane and Tyler. The fireplace in the corner crackled, keeping the room comfortably warm. When Rose suggested you all play charades, the entertainment for the evening was decided, especially considering the cabin had very weak cell-signal and no television.

“What are the teams?” You asked, sitting dead in the middle of everyone with three friends to your left and three to your right.

“Let’s do 3 against 4, so you choose who you wanna be with, Y/N.” Jane suggested as Rose stood up to get a boxed set of charade cards from the game cabinet near the kitchen. You looked between the two sets of friends. You wanted to lean towards Tom, Harrison, and Rose, because the two boys were incredible at charades, and Rose was your go-to partner for Password at least.

“Come on, you know you wanna be with us.” Will teased, throwing an arm over your shoulder.

“Just for that, nope.” You laughed and took his arm off you. You stood up from that couch and squeezed in between Tom and the arm. To make room for you and to mock Will, Tom casually put his arm on your shoulder and you made no effort to take it off.

Rose returned with the box of cards and the game began with you and Jane pantomiming first. The words ranged from silly ones like centipede to more inventive ones like lapdance; either way, you all were laughing and enjoying the evening. Tom was highly appreciative of the humor because more than once, you laughed so hard that you fell into him, clutching his knee or completely falling over into his lap. It wasn’t anything out of the usual for him to see you so effortlessly happy, but he enjoyed all the little touches.

“Okay, okay.” You breathed out, doing your best to compose yourself. You stood up from the couch with Tyler so that you two could read the answer and continue the round. Reading over the card, “Catch 22”, you began to think about what you could do to act out the card. As if it wasn’t impossible enough to describe it with words, you had to act it out. But then the lightbulb went off- you had a secret advantage and he was sitting right in front of you, as long as he could figure it out.

“Ready?” Tyler asked you nervously, and you nodded. Tyler started with the usual way of beginning: how many words and what it is. You immediately pointed at Harrison.

“Me?” Harrison spoke in confusion, and you nodded before pointing to your stomach, doing your best to act his death from the series.

“Catch 22?” Tom offered, and Harrison looked at him dumbfounded, still trying to connect how it was him as your main clue.

“Ah, thank god.” You smiled, cheering as he guessed it right. Tyler and the others sighed.

“How the fuck did you get that?” Jane questioned.

“Haz, here, was in the show.” Tom replied, proud of his friend. You were surprised by your college friends’ collective shock, but you were most intrigued by Rose’s reaction.

“Oh my god, I thought you looked familiar.” She said, impressed.

“Wait, you actually saw it?” Harrison asked.

“Yeah, I think I might have cried when you died.” She admitted, brushing a loose hair behind her ear, and that’s when it clicked for you- she was totally into Harrison.

“And you’re an actor too, Tom, right?” Will spoke up, casually taking a drink of his beer. You eyed him skeptically; he knew Tom was an actor. Back when you two were dating, you’d talk about your best friend’s accomplishments, so why was he now asking? Your only answer was it would clearly get a rise out of, at least, you, if not Tom as well.

“Yeah, only been in little indie movies. Nothing anyone’s heard of.” Tom played it off jokingly, causing you to smack him on the arm a little, your hand resting on his bicep.

“My mom loves that movie you did with Ewan McGregor.” Rose commented.

“Ah yeah,” Will laughed, “The one where you’re like 12.”

“I wasn’t 12, but thank you.” Tom replied sarcastically, and you could tell he was biting back a scoff. 

“Well, we’ve all seen the Marvel movies so you can brag a little about those.” You teased, making him blush.

“I know I cried when everyone was getting dusted.” Jane stated in a way to poke fun at Rose’s previous words.

“Never saw them.” Will shrugged carelessly.

“Yes, you did.” You corrected him immediately, and you felt Tom tense a little under your touch. While Tom liked that you were being supportive about this, he couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong.

Will acknowledged Tom’s clenched jaw and decided to press it a bit further, “Babe, if you’re talking about Infinity War, then, no, I didn’t pay attention.” He chuckled, “Don’t you remember we were in the middle of something?”

Tom wondered, at first, what he meant exactly. You dropped your hand from Tom’s arm and covered your face in embarrassment, but before you could comment, Rose let out a whine, “Gross, I was right next to you two.”

“Not like you’ve never gotten it on in a movie theater.” Tyler joked.

“Can we please not talk about this?” You groaned, getting up from the couch. “I’m going to bed. I’m tired.”

“That’s not a bad idea.” Jane stated as she stood up with a yawn. You closed your door, escaping to the privacy of your room, not wanting to think about how your ex just told everyone about that night- in your defense, you’d already seen the movie before so you weren’t missing anything.

Tyler and Will followed after Jane, leaving Tom, Harrison and Rose as they cleaned up the few cards that were left out. Feeling the awkwardness radiating off of Tom, Rose delicately spoke up, “Will’s just being a dick.”

“It’s fine.” Tom reassured her.

“Did you really cry when I died?” Harrison asked her the question that’d been on his mind since the second she’d made the comment. They started talking about the show, and Tom took that as a sign to leave. He thought for a moment about knocking on your door and checking in on you, but then he realized it might be too uncomfortable for you to talk about. There were times, like tonight with charades, that Tom considered maybe you liked him back, based on all your little touches here and there, but then, with Will’s comments floating around his mind, his thoughts were plagued by the doom of the friendzone. Tom didn’t know if he’d be able to sleep tonight knowing that you and your annoying ex ‘got it on’ in the theater during his own movie- what if he was dying on screen but you were too enraptured in Will to cry like Rose had cried over Harrison dying?

Tom only had a few minutes to himself before Harrison came back into their shared room, asking him, “How’re you feeling about the run tomorrow?”

“It’s going to kill me.” Tom sighed, and Harrison shrugged before climbing into the top bunk.

“Should’ve been running with me.” He laughed, “It’s not even that far.”

“I haven’t run five straight miles since Jake nearly killed me at the gym.” He replied, tidying up his bag.

“Why are you cleaning?” Harrison asked, looking down at his friend. “Are you worried Y/N’s going to come into the room or something?”

“Shove off.” Tom grumbled. Harrison took off his sweaty socks that he’d neglected to remove before getting into his bed and threw them down at his friend. One missed Tom completely, and the other clung to his shoulder. “That’s fucking gross.”

“If you’re cleaning, then clean them up.” He snickered. Tom threw the sock back at his friend, but it missed and weakly fell to the ground. A knock came from the other side of the door, and Tom opened it, smiling when he saw it was you, his absolute favorite person on this godforsaken trip. While you looked rather cute in your casual summer pajamas, he frowned when he saw his sweatshirt in your hands.

“Are you returning it?” He asked, and you laughed.

“It doesn’t smell like you anymore.” You said quietly, hoping Harrison didn’t hear your words. You held it out to Tom, “I figured I can give it back to you for a time, and then steal it once it smells like you again.”

“Wait a second.” Tom took the sweatshirt from you and disappeared into the room, rummaging through his once neat backpack to grab out another sweatshirt. He handed it to you, “Maybe this could suffice for now?”

Smiling, you sniffed it a little before tugging it on, “Thanks. It’s so cold upstairs, I don’t know how I’d sleep without it.”

“You could always bring your own.” Harrison said from the top bunk. Tom turned and chucked the other sweatshirt at him. You rolled your eyes at his words.

“Watch it, Osterfield, or your mattress is going to end up in the middle of the lake with you still sleeping on it.” You playfully threatened.

“I’m quaking with fear.” He laughed, laying down on the bed out of sight.

“Well, I should go.” You told Tom, “Thank you for the sweatshirt. Good night.”

“Good night, Y/N.” He smiled softly at you. As you walked away, he slowly closed the door, pleased with himself and his choice in sweatshirts. He turned to finish getting ready for bed, just in time for Harrison to throw the sweatshirt back at him.

“I will kick you out of this room.” Tom grumbled.

“I’d like to see you try.”

You didn’t sleep well that night. Even with Tom’s sweatshirt, your room was unbearably cold, and it didn’t help that Rose snored. With only a few hours of sleep under your belt, you woke up the next morning to the sun streaming in through the large window behind the bed and Rose already up and out of the room. You padded into the kitchen, making yourself some tea with the rustic teapot that was set out on the counter. Spotting Rose and Jane standing out on the balcony, you made your way outside.

“Good morning.” You said through a yawn, coming to stand beside Rose.

“We were wondering when you were going to wake up.” Jane teased. You looked at your two friends quizzically, taking a sip of your steaming tea.

“You already missed part one of the gun show.” Rose joked, sitting up straighter to look over the edge of the balcony, “They should be back any second.”

“Oh God.” You laughed, remembering the boys and their run this morning.

“I know I’m with Tyler, but damn, Y/N.” She teased, and Rose nudged you playfully. “Here they come.”

Seeing motion through the trees, you looked over at the runners. It was obvious they were racing the last bit of the run, considering how triumphant Harrison looked when he arrived first with Will right on his tail. And then came Tyler, and finally Tom. There was probably only a few seconds between their arrival, but it was still amusing to spy the looks on their faces. They were all shirtless and glistening in a layer of sweat, and they hadn’t noticed the three of you on the balcony at all- not that you were complaining. You’d rather not have them catch you all checking them out so unabashedly.

“Look at that. 24 abs right there.” Jane let out a small sigh. While her comment was for all four boys, her eyes stayed trained on Tyler. Rose, on the other hand, had her eyes on Harrison’s figure, which you noted to tease her about later. But you, you couldn’t help but check out Tom’s bare torso- there was a reason you didn’t watch either Spider-Man movie with him- you always ended up a little too focused on his shirtless scenes.

“Enjoying the show?” Tyler called up to the three of you, a cheeky smirk on his face, as they all made their way up to the cabin. You could’ve sworn you saw Tom blush a little when he met your gaze before Harrison playfully shoved his friend, making Tom lose focus on you and shove him right back.

“Boys.” Rose laughed quietly to you. You bit your lip, nodding in agreement.

“I’m glad I didn’t miss part two.”

The boys made their way into the kitchen, seeking out some water and gatorade as you and the girls went back inside to greet them. The sweet smell of salmon from last night was gone, overthrown by the ever lovely smell of sweaty men.

“It smells like a gym in here.” Rose gagged in disgust.

“I would’ve gone for sweaty ballsack, but yours is much nicer.” Jane laughed.

“Janie would know.” Will teased, clapping Tyler on the shoulder as he drank from his water, making the other choke a little.

“So how was the run?” You asked Tom as he and Harrison came over to you, Tom’s bottle of gatorade almost gone already. The other four got engrossed in their own conversation.

“Just a small workout, nothing too bad.” He replied, brushing it off.

“He was dying.” Harrison stated, making you laugh. “I told him he’s got to run with me more.”

“Well, you won, Haz, so congrats.” You replied.

“How did you know we were racing?” Tom asked. His ears turned pink from thinking that you knew he came in last.

“The four of you act like teenage boys; of course you’re going to make a race out of a casual run.” You teased.

“We should probably go stretch before our muscles tighten up again.” Harrison said, already backing up towards the stairs. Tom made his way to follow him, and you spoke up.

“I’ll come with.” You offered, setting your mug of tea on the counter. You followed them downstairs and out to the patio, feeling like you might as well spend some alone time with your two closest friends.

“You two think you can make it on the hike today?” You teased, already seeing Tom walk a little funny.

“Yeah, yeah, we got this.” He reassured you, sitting down on the solid ground to start stretching his legs. You started to stretch with them, and Harrison looked at you funny for it.

“Why are you stretching?” He asked with a laugh.

“It helps with flexibility.” You shrugged, switching legs as they did, all three of you mirroring the same poses. “How was the lake?”

“It was nice. We weren’t exactly looking at it though.” Tom replied with a chuckle.

“I don’t know, you were going so slow, I thought you were.” Harrison joked and Tom kicked his foot out, hitting Harrison in the leg.

“It’s shit like this that made me believe you were racing.” You laughed.

“I don’t do long distance running. I like focusing on my abs a lot more.” Tom defended himself. You flicked your eyes down to his abs, nodding a little, but Tom was so focused on his stretching that he had missed your small action, whereas Harrison fully caught it. He laughed, sending you a wink, and you flipped him off. Tom caught that exchange though, “Did I miss something?”

“Nope.” You replied quickly, only making Harrison laugh harder, “He’s just being a dumbass. Onto hamstrings.”

The three of you laid down to stretch your hamstrings, and you heard Tom let out a small groan from beside you. “I can’t do this. I fucking hate leg day.”

“Need help?” You offered. Before he could protest, you were already on your feet. He held his leg up as high as he could, and you pressed on his foot to stretch his hamstring even more.

“What if I need help too?” Harrison pouted, even though he was stretching his leg just fine.

“Sorry, Haz, it’s just you and your hand.” You joked, making Tom laugh.

“I see how it is. Ha ha, it’s me and my hand, and Tom and your hand, Y/N.” He sarcastically replied, as you dropped Tom’s leg and he bent his knee for you to lean on his shin. You helped him to deepen the stretch through his leg.

“Someone’s jealous.” Tom said, before grimacing a little.

“Was that too far?” You asked, loosening your hold on his leg, not wanting to overstretch his hamstring.

“A little.” He replied.

“God, Y/N don’t be so rough on him.” Harrison piped in, still having no issue stretching on his own.

“Haz, if you’re going to be a pouty baby about not having a stretching buddy, talk to Rose. She was totally checking you out earlier.” You stated, trying to change the conversation off of Harrison’s unnecessary innuendos. You let go of Tom’s leg and reached for his foot to stretch his other hamstring.

“Wait, really?” He asked, dropping his leg to peer at you with a serious look on his face.

“Yeah, why would I lie to you about that?” You laughed, “Besides, I don’t think I’ve ever seen her read a book, so I think she was lying about Catch 22.”

Flustered, Wide eyed and blushing, Harrison mumbled something about grabbing a shower before bolting off. You exchanged a curious look with Tom, but he followed after his friend.

You made your way inside after them and went to fix yourself another cup of tea. When you saw Will alone in the kitchen, you momentarily considered changing your mind and going to your rook, but it was too late, as he had already seen you.

“Want a cup?” He asked, holding up the coffee pot after he finished pouring himself a cup.

“No thanks.” You replied and made your way to the kettle.

“Enjoy the show earlier? Tyler and I started this new training routine that’s supposed to help with bulking up.” Will said. It took everything in you to not roll your eyes at his words.

“And how’s that working out for you?” You asked, not even trying to hide your disinterest. You still hadn’t forgiven him for his immature comments last night. Plus, the more you saw Will interact with Tom, the more justified you felt with your annoyance.

Will stepped closer to you. Slowly, he took one of your hands in his and pressed it to his abs, and you’d be lying if you said you couldn’t feel every part of his toned stomach. As much as you hated to admit it, you felt like you were falling under his trance again. “There’s more where that came from. Why don’t you come by my room tonight?”

He dropped your hand, and you were pulled out of your foggy state. You stepped away, turning away from him to continue getting yourself some tea. You felt his body envelope yours from behind. His head rested on your shoulder and his hands smoothed over your waist. Pressing a kiss to your cheek, he murmured, “I miss you.”

At his words, something inside of you snapped and you jolted away from his embrace, slapping his hands away. Firmly, you said, “I don’t miss you.”

Will left the room without another word, and you were left to ponder what the hell just happened as you stood alone in the kitchen.

It wasn’t until a few hours later that you all left on the hike, trailing through the towering trees to make your way to a nearby peak. You all stopped a few times for water and some food, and to even just enjoy nature. Between Jane’s ornithology degree, Tyler’s botany background, and Will’s forestry knowledge, identifying the different birds, plants, and trees around you was relatively easy.

“Can you imagine if we studied something environmental too?” Rose joked, nudging you in the shoulder as Jane mindlessly went on about the bird that had flown past nearly ten minutes ago.

“God, it would never end.” You laughed.

“What did you study?” Harrison asked Rose, making you look at Tom and roll your eyes at your friends.

“I’m a nurse.” She replied, and the two got swept into their own conversation.

“You sore yet?” You asked Tom, poking him in the side as you all continued the hike uphill.

“Me? Sore? Never.” He laughed. He shook his head to try to hide the slight hurt from the question. First, you didn’t think he was outdoorsy enough and now you think he can’t handle doing some mileage. “I’m perfectly fine.”

“Oh sure.” You smiled at him. Tyler pointed out a specific plant as you all passed it, talking about the intricate properties of the shrub.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been more confused about nature.” Tom mumbled to you quietly. Since you two were far enough behind Tyler, Jane, and Will, they couldn’t hear his comment.

“Don’t worry. I have no clue what he’s talking about either.” You reassured him before letting out a small yawn.

“Did you not sleep well last night?” He asked, looking over at you in concern.

“Someone was snoring a bit too loud for me to sleep.” You said, loud enough for Rose to hear. She stopped and spun around to face you, face red in embarrassment.

“It’s a nasal condition! You know how I get when it’s cold!” She defended. As much as she tried to sound angry, she still had a small smile on her face.

“Love you, Rose.” You blew her a kiss, laughing at her reaction. She and Harrison turned back around and continued their conversation about who knows what.

“I think Harrison’s got a nasal condition too.” Tom whispered, making you stifle a laugh to not draw attention back to the two of you.

“Rose doesn’t even snore that loud.” You admitted quietly, “Even with your sweatshirt, I was still too cold to sleep.”

“I can give you another one when we get back. You can double up.” He offered, “But it was pretty cold last night.”

“Thanks. I’ll probably take you up on that.” You smiled softly at him. “You know, I’m really happy you came.”

“I’m happy I came, too. Thanks for inviting me.” He replied, and you nodded in response. Tom paused after a moment, stopping his tracks to look at you with furrowed eyebrows, “Wait, did you not expect me to come?”

You looked at him in confusion, before answering, “I mean I did, but-“

“But I’m not outdoorsy, so you didn’t think I’d actually be here.” Tom grumbled in agitation, beginning to walk again quickly to catch up to the group. You ran up after him.

“Is that what this is about?” You questioned, your voice unintentionally raised, “That I said you weren’t the camping type back home?”

Harrison and Rose turned to look at the two of you, and Tom just bit his tongue to keep from exploding about the sensitive subject. He knew he shouldn’t have asked, but he just felt so inadequate with Will going on and on about trees and shit.

“What is going on with you?” You questioned with a huff of frustration.

“It’s nothing. Let’s just keep going.” Tom stated, shaking his head.

“I’m not going one more step until you tell me what the hell is up.”

“What’s the hold up?” Will called back when he noticed the stop in your hike. Tom went to step forward to continue the journey, but missed his footing on a particularly slick patch of leaves. 

A collective, concerned shout came from you and Harrison as Tom hit the ground. He groaned in pain, and Rose came to his side. All frustration at him slipped out of you as worry flooded your system.

“Tom, oh my god- are you okay?” You asked.

“I think I rolled my ankle.” Tom said, cradling his ankle in his lap.

Rose looked at it briefly, no noticeable swelling or bruising yet. “Can you stand on it?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” He replied before pushing himself to his feet. He bit back a grimace, standing on his ankle as normal, and you didn’t seem to be the only one to notice it. “Let’s finish the hike, yeah?” 

“You’re not hiking on that.” Rose shook her head with a small laugh.

“I don’t want to hold you all back. I can manage it, really.”

“It’s fine. We’ll continue on. Y/N can lead you back.” Jane spoke up, a little smirk playing on her lips.

“I’ll go with.” Harrison offered.

“As the house nurse, I feel obligated to walk back with him.” Rose added, and you caught the blush that touched her cheeks.

And just like that, it was settled. You, Rose, and Harrison would walk back with Tom, who was doing his best not to limp, which everyone saw through. Rose and Harrison made conversation the whole walk back, while you and Tom just stayed awkwardly silent. By the time you all made it back to the house, he still hadn’t spoken to you. You went to put away your hiking gear and found Tom a few minutes later, sitting on the porch as he looked at the forest before him, an ice pack on his elevated ankle to help with potential swelling.

“I meant what I said.” You spoke up quietly as you sat in the chair beside him. When he just continued to look straight ahead and not physically acknowledge your presence, you continued, “I am really happy that you’re here, Tom. I didn’t say that because I didn’t think you’d want to come. The only reason I wouldn’t expect you to come is because you’re always busy. I guess what I really meant was that I’m grateful you were able to make time for me this week, especially because I know the countless other, more fun things you could be doing right now. It really means a lot.”

After another brief silent moment passed between the two of you, he looked over at you with a small frown on his face. “Why would you think I wouldn’t make time for you?”

“Like I said, you’re busy. You do one movie after the other, and I feel like we hardly see each other anymore. It’s,” You trailed off, searching for the right word, “comforting that you’d want to spend your free time with me.”

“You’re my best friend. Of course, I’d want to spend time with you.”

You knew his words were sweet and that he meant every single one of them, but you still felt a small, subtle twist in your gut.  Another unnatural silence fell between the two of you until Rose came outside like a true savior.

“We’re planning on making s’mores tonight, are you down?” She asked, a cheery smile on her face.

“I’m offended you’re even asking me that.” You stated, and she rolled her eyes at you. You turned to Tom, smiling, “You’re going to love them. Just don’t burn yourself.”

“Burn myself?” He looked at you as if you were crazy, making you laugh.

“Don’t scare him.” Rose teased, “Besides, my money’s on Harrison burning himself first.”

“I heard that!” He called from inside the cabin through the screen door.

Just as Rose was about to leave to go back inside, Tom spoke up, raising his hand a little, still confused, “How do you burn yourself on s’mores?”

Several hours later, he got his answer.

“Ow, fuck, shit, ow.” Harrison cursed, dropping his burnt marshmallow into the dirt.

“That’s how.” You laughed as Rose clinked her s’more against yours.

“How do you know when it’s ready?” Tom asked, eyeing the marshmallow at the end of his stick. He slowly rotated the stick in his hands just as you had told him to do.

“Golden brown are the best, but they’re tricky to make because you can burn them instantly, which is what Harrison did.” You teased your blond friend beside you before taking a bite of your perfect s’more and turning back to face Tom on your other side. “Burnt ones aren’t bad, they just have a more burnt flavor, obviously.”

“So is it ready yet?” He questioned, but he was looking at you not at his roasting marshmallow.

“No,” You giggled. You finished off your s’more with another bite and scooted closer to him on the log. You placed your hand on top of his on the stick, twisting it so that the marshmallow was a few inches above the flame instead of right by the firewood. “And you just keep rotating it. You can see there’s already a gold hue to it.”

You smiled, looking over at him to find him already gazing at you with a soft smile of his own playing on his lips. The light from the campfire made his brown eyes sparkle with specks of gold.

“It’s burning!” Jane exclaimed, and you quickly retracted the stick and marshmallow, blowing out the fire on the now burned marshmallow.

“Well, it’s golden on one side, but burnt marshmallows are an essential part of the s’mores making business.” You said as you passed the stick back to Tom. You gathered the two parts of a graham cracker as well as some Hershey’s chocolate and set it up for a s’more.

“I think I need help with this part.” Tom admitted with a chuckle.

“So you put the marshmallow here.” You pointed at the graham cracker topped with a piece of chocolate. He moved the stick to put the marshmallow in its proper position, and then you put the other half of the graham cracker on top. Grasping the two graham crackers with the marshmallow in the middle, you finished, “And now pull out.”

“Hah, pull out.” Tyler laughed at the innuendo through a face full of his double stacked s’mores. Tom did as told, his eyes lighting up in excitement when you presented him his very own s’more.

“Ta-da. It’s real rocket science, isn’t it?” You joked, and Harrison elbowed you, still grumpy that he had lost his first marshmallow and burnt his hand trying to catch it.

“Burnt and fallen marshmallows are just casualties of s’more making.” Rose said.

“S’mores have to be the thing I miss most about living here— the U.K. just doesn’t do camping quite as well.” You stated, shaking your head a little in disbelief.

“How could you miss s’mores more than us?” Will asked, a playfulness in his voice, but you could recognize the serious undertones of his words.

“I’d miss s’mores more than I’d miss you.” Rose teased, saving you from having to actually think of a response.

“Hand me a marshmallow. I’m ready to try again for a golden one.” Tom said to you, and you reached over into the marshmallow bag beside you, slipping him the soft treat.

“Good luck.” You encouraged him with a laugh.

Tom’s second attempt ended up burnt as well, and you gladly ate it while he made his third one. By the time it was golden brown and ready to be eaten, Jane, Tyler, and even Will had retired for the night.

“That tastes so much better not burnt to a crisp.” Tom said, impressed by his own marshmallow-roasting skills.

“Camping heaven.” You agreed, finishing off the s’more he’d burned earlier.

Rose stood up with a small sigh, stretching her arms. “I think I might head to bed.”

“Me too.” Harrison stated, getting up after her. Tom looked at him questioningly, and you bit your lip, giving Rose a teasing look. She rolled her eyes at you, smiling to herself as she turned to head towards the cabin.

Noticing how Harrison’s hand caught hers once they were a decent distance from the campfire, you called out to them, “Good night!”

“Night!” They chorused back.

“Haz and Rose seem to have hit it off.” Tom commented once they were inside. Your eyes drifted from the dying fire up to the starry sky overhead. 

“Yeah, they really have.” You nodded, caught up focusing on the twinkling lights above you. Quietly, you admitted, “I’ll never get tired of looking at the stars.”

“I bet your neck will.” He joked, making you shake your head.

“They’re just so beautiful.” You mumbled.

“Really beautiful.” You heard Tom murmur under his breath. Your eyes flickered over to him, noticing how he was definitely staring at you and not the stars in the sky. When he turned to face the campfire, your eyes diverted back up to the stars, trying your best to suppress how fast your heart was racing.

“I used to know all of the constellations too. Will and I used to camp a lot, and I’d just study the stars until I fell asleep.” You confessed, attempting to strike up a conversation to keep you from your thoughts. When Tom said nothing in reply, a small sigh escaped your lips, and your eyes trailed back down to Tom beside you. Staring right into the dying campfire, he looked deep in thought.

“What’s on your mind?” You asked him, nudging him a little with your shoulder.

“It’s nothing.” Tom shook his head, but his attempts to play off his thoughts didn’t work on you. After a moment, he spoke up, barely meeting your eyes as he did so, “Did you and Will really— you know— in my movie—“ he trailed off, not wanting to finish his question. He was already apprehensive about the answer, and yet he couldn’t help himself from asking.

“In Infinity War?” You asked, laughing lightly at his question, or lack thereof. Looking up towards the sky again, you replied, “Unless you count the fastest handjob ever, no, we didn’t.”

Tom was silent, making you look back over at him. His shoulders were shaking as he bit his lip, doing his best to stifle his laughter.

“Shut up.” You scoffed, playfully hitting his arm. “It wasn’t like you were dying in the scene or anything. You weren’t even on the screen.”

“I didn’t say anything.” He insisted, before breaking into a fit of laughter, unable to contain it any longer. In that moment, you felt complete tranquility. Tom’s laughter broke through the silence of the atmosphere, making your heart flutter in happiness. His eyes were shut, and you could count every crinkle by his eyes. With the fire illuminating his features just right, he was positively glowing. If you wanted any moment to last forever, it was this one. Tom settled his laughter, “Sorry, I shouldn’t be laughing, but it’s just-” He paused, and his smile faltered momentarily, “It’s a relief.”

“A relief?” You repeated before you could help yourself, and Tom realized his words.

He cleared his throat awkwardly, thinking on his feet of an explanation, “It would’ve been really awkward if I was dying, and you and Will- yeah.” He stopped himself short, and a comfortable silence overcame the two of you.

“How’s your ankle feeling?” You asked, not wanting the conversation to end. If it ended, then that meant the night was over and your precious alone time with Tom was over.

“It’s fine, now. Honestly, it didn’t hurt that much.” He replied with a bit of a nod. You watched as he sucked in a tight breath, “I’m sorry about what happened earlier on the hike. I got frustrated and a little jealous. I was so determined to prove that I could be like Will that I just ended up being a dick.”

His words took a moment to sink in, but you found a small smile breaking over your face as you understood the layers of their meaning. You reached out and touched his knee. Softly, you admitted, “You have no reason to be jealous over Will. I’d never want you to be like him. The main reason that I broke up with him was because, well, he’s not you.”

You could see Tom think about your words for a moment before, ever so slowly, he started to lean in. Tom’s lips seemed to fit perfectly with yours, tenderly moving in sync as you both caved into your suppressed feelings. With one hand cupping your cheek, Tom’s other hand moved to your waist, pulling you in closer to him. You paid no mind to the uncomfortableness of your position on the log, too lost in the kiss to think straight. For the second time that night, you wished that this moment would last forever.

But it came to a quick, bittersweet end as Tom pulled away. His face stayed close to yours, his breath fanning over your face. A smile crossed his lips, “That took us way too long.”

“Way, way too long.” You agreed. He went to pull you in for another kiss, but the sudden cold of the dying fire pulled you two back to reality. Almost reluctantly, you said, “I guess we should probably head inside.”

It was far too cold for either of you to want to stay outside without the comforting heat. Gathering the food and putting out the last of the fire, you two walked back to the cabin, hand in hand.

“Thank you for the s’mores.” Tom said quietly to you, aware that most likely everyone in the cabin was sleeping. He placed the last couple bags of marshmallows and graham crackers on the kitchen counter (the chocolate was all eaten long ago), and you made a mental note to take care of it in the morning. 

“Any time.” You joked softly. Tom leaned in to give you a quick, but just as sweet good night kiss.

As he made his way over to the stairs, he spoke up again, “Don’t get too cold tonight.”

“Good night, Tom.” You laughed lightly, turning towards your bedroom door.

“Good night, Y/N.” 

With one last exchange of soft, sleepy smiles, you both turned to go your separate ways.

When you entered your quaint cabin room, you were met with Rose’s snores, a sharp contrast to your favorite sound that was Tom’s laughter from moments ago. You quietly maneuvered around the room, getting ready for bed. A smile ghosted your lips as you tugged on Tom’s hoodie. The familiar warmth and scent enveloping you comfortably.

You waited for sleep to overcome you on the cold bed; it felt like hours (when really, it was probably only ten minutes) before you finally decided to get up. With a small sigh, you shuffled out of the bed. Maybe the couch would give you more peace than your shared room.

As you made your way out of your room, you heard a door downstairs open. Curiously, you peeked down the staircase to see Tom emerging from the bathroom, in nothing but basketball shorts.

“What are you still doing up?” Tom asked you with his voice just above a whisper. You silently made your way down the stairs until you were in front of him.

“Couldn’t sleep. The room hasn’t gotten any warmer since last night.” You admitted, subconsciously crossing your arms.

“Come here.” Tom slowly uncrossed your arms, taking one of your hands loosely in his. He led you to his room. The door creaked open and shed some light into the dark bedroom. Wordlessly, he brought you over to his bed and dropped your hand to shuffle the blankets.

“What about Haz?” You whispered as Tom slipped into his bed, laying sideways and as close to the wall as possible to make some room for you.

“It’ll be fine.” He reassured you. You slid into the bed, finding comfort under the blankets. You laid on your side facing Tom, and it was then that you realized just how small the twin bed was— you two were close enough to each other that you could feel his minty breath fan over your cheeks, which still made you nervous even though just ten minutes ago he’d kissed you.

“We’re never going to fall asleep like this.” You teased softly. Tom let out a quiet laugh, shuffling so he was flatter on his back, giving you room to lay in his arms. With your head pressed to his bare chest and his strong arms circling around you, you finally found warmth.

“You’re really warm.” You mumbled into his chest, snuggling into his embrace and letting your legs tangle comfortably with his. It wasn’t the first time the two of you had cuddled, but it was the first time the two of you have cuddled on a tiny bed and with him being shirtless.

“Makes me the best cuddling partner.” Tom mumbled, his chest shaking lightly underneath you as he chuckled. You hummed in agreement, a smile forming on your face.

“Do you two ever shut up?” You heard Harrison question from the bunk above you.

“Do you always have to ruin a perfectly good moment?” Tom replied, and you subconsciously snuggled deeper into his embrace.

“I better not wake up in the middle of the night to noises.” He grumbled. The bed shuffled as he flipped over in his bed to get comfortable.

“Haz, that’s just you snoring.” You teased. He muttered something incoherent and you whispered to Tom, “Let’s wait until he starts snoring and then move his mattress to the lake.”

“Deal.”

Unfortunately for you but luckily for Harrison, you drifted off quickly, listening to the sound of Tom’s heart beating underneath you. You couldn’t help yourself; he made for the best pillow and the best heat source.

The next morning, you woke up with a start, hearing a loud thud from right beside you. Blearily, you leaned over the edge of the twin bed to find the source of the sound; when you saw a groaning, half-asleep Tom on the floor below you, a fit of laughter overcame you. The blankets were falling off the bed, all tangled up in his legs.

“Did you fall off the bed?” Harrison asked, even though all three of you already knew the answer, and you looked up to see him peering over the edge of the bunk bed.

“It’s not funny.” Tom muttered, frowning in faux annoyance at your continued laughter.

You held your hands out to him, offering to help him up even though you were in an impossible position to really help, still laying in the actual bed. Teasingly, you asked, “You got an owie?”

Chuckling, Tom reached up and grabbed your hands, pulling you off the bed. You let out a yelp as you landed on top of him, in a similar position to just last night. Your legs subconsciously fell on either side of his to somewhat straddle him, and you lifted yourself up on the palms of your hands to look down at him properly, a smile etched on your face. The familiar intoxicating pull from last night returned; you almost forgot Harrison was in the room— key word, almost.

“Get up before I come down there and join in.”

And with that, you quickly got off of Tom, and he scrambled to his feet. As Harrison came down the bunk bed ladder, you and Tom put the blankets back onto the bottom bed. You pondered where last night left the two of you, and you weren’t sure how to approach the subject. You were clearly more than friends, but were you more than friends in front of the others?

“What’s for breakfast?” Harrison asked, cutting you off from your thoughts. 

Over the course of the next few hours, you tried to somehow be alone with Tom to talk things over. It felt odd how things ended last night— not a bad odd, but odd nonetheless. Between the guys going for yet another run and you all spending time at the lake together, it just seemed like the opportunity would never come.

“God, I can’t believe it took you that long.” Rose teased, a giddy smile on her face as she cut off your recounting of last night. The boys were outside chopping some firewood while you, Rose, and Jane prepared dinner.

Jane winked at you jokingly, “What was it like?”

“What was what like? The kissing?” You asked, and she nodded.

“We want all the details!”

“In all honesty, it was the best kiss of my life.” You admitted, the butterflies you felt last night returning at just the thought.

As the three of you continued to talk, coo, and gossip about the four boys outside, they were hard at work. The late afternoon summer sun was bearing down on them, and they had stripped away their shirts earlier. Tom decided very early on that he didn’t like chopping wood, even if Harrison was somehow worse at it than him. While Tom and Harrison mainly kept to themselves, Will and Tyler had their own conversations going, despite the others clearly within earshot.

“You and Jane— I don’t know how you do it. One girl for all those years?” Will commented, and Tyler laughed with a shrug.

“It’s been so long, I don’t know what I would do without her. Plus, she’s the best fuck I’ve ever had.” Tyler said crassly, making his friend laugh.

“Mine was by far Y/N.” He stated, loudly, as if to ensure that Tom would hear it. At the sound of your name, Tom and Harrison both began to listen in on the conversation.

“It’s been years. Surely, there’s been someone else.”

“Nope.” Will protested, stopping his work to lean on the axe handle, “She was supposed to come over last night, but she must’ve gotten lost.” Tom couldn’t stop himself from scoffing at his words. Hearing the sound, Will turned to face Tom, “Got something to say?”

“Yeah, I do actually.” Tom said, dropping the axe. Holding himself up straighter, he made his way closer to Will. Harrison hesitantly stepped closer to Tom as the brunet continued, “She didn’t get lost, she just had a better option.”

“Better option? You mean you?” He bit back. “Yesterday, you couldn’t even do a simple hike without hurting yourself, and you’re shit at chopping wood. You may think you’re hot shit in London, but this is my turf, movie star. I’m the one who gets the girl here.”

Harrison went to grab Tom’s balled fist, but he was too late as Tom had already swung, nailing the surprised Will right in the nose. Will responded quickly, throwing a punch back at Tom. Tyler and Harrison exchanged questioning looks, silently wondering if they should break up the fight or just let them go at it, but the pair decided the former was probably a better idea.

Aware of sudden commotion outside, you, Rose, and Jane all rushed to the balcony, wondering what could possibly be happening. The fight between Tom and Will was ending as Harrison and Tyler both successfully pulled their respective friends away from the other. Even from the distance, you could see the new bruises on Tom’s face and Will’s bloody nose; it was most likely broken, but you didn’t have it in you to care. The boys were unaware of you and the others, until Harrison looked up at the balcony. He gave you a sad smile, and Tom was next to look up. Ashamed, he didn’t dare to meet your eyes and, instead, grabbed his shirt from a nearby log and trudged his way down to the lake.

Your eyes flickered to Will, and a pit of anger flamed inside you. Just by the look on his face, you didn’t even need to question who was the antagonist. Not bothering to say a word to Rose or Jane, you marched downstairs and out to where Will, Tyler, and Harrison remained.

“What did you say to him?” You questioned Will angrily. 

“Nothing he didn’t already know.” He replied nonchalantly.

“That’s bullshit, Will. This is all just bullshit. Every chance you get, you bring up something to antagonize Tom and embarrass me. And, every time you do that, you just remind me that you’re half the man Tom is.”

“You’re acting like I was the one to start the fight. News flash, princess, your man threw the first punch.” Will said, bitterly.

You stepped closer to him, your eyes hardening, and you swore you saw fear flicker in his eyes. “Believe me, if Tom hadn’t broken your nose already, I would break it myself.”

Without another word, you turned on your heel and headed down to the lake. You knew they were all watching you-- Harrison, Tyler, and Will from the ground and Rose and Jane from the balcony. The sun was already starting to line the tops of the trees across the lake, and you felt your anger slowly dissipating as you saw Tom sitting on the dock. With his legs swinging off the edge, he looked at peace, but you knew him better than that; a storm was brewing in his head.

You didn’t say anything, and Tom made no effort to look away from his hands in his lap as you approached. Silently, you sat down right next to him at the end of the dock. Now that you were beside him, you noticed the bruise forming on his eyebrow and the cut on his lip. Will definitely got a few good shots at him, but you could tell Tom had gotten him worse. Your eyes trailed down to his hands; his knuckles were red in agony. Slowly, you reached your hand out to grab his injured one.

“It doesn’t hurt.” Tom mumbled, but you could tell he was holding back the truth. You tenderly placed a kiss on each of his red knuckles before intertwining your fingers.

“Wanna talk about what happened?” You asked him quietly, fearing if you spoke too loud the fragile moment would somehow be ruined.

“He was talking about you like you were just a good fuck and nothing more.” He replied, his voice just as soft as yours.

You couldn’t help but smile at him, your heart fluttering at the thought that he was defending you. You let go of his hand and turned to properly face him. The smile never left your face as you cupped his face in your hands. Confused, Tom asked through a laugh, “What are you doing?”

You kissed his bruised eyebrow before responding, “Well, I’ve got to kiss it better, don’t I?”

“I think you missed a spot then.” Tom pointed to his lips with a cheeky grin. You pressed a chaste kiss to the cut on his lip, before teasingly pulling away. You didn’t get far as Tom’s hand went to the back of your neck, bringing you in for another, deeper kiss. Caught up in the moment, you somehow forgot about his cut; it wasn’t until you nibbled on his bottom lip, accidentally catching the cut, that you remembered and Tom pulled away with a quiet groan.

“I’m sorry.” You said through a laugh, though you were still genuinely concerned about him. Your fingers traced lightly over the agitated cut.

“It’s okay.” He reassured you. One of his hands trailed up your arm to your own hand, and he brought it to his lips, kissing it just as gently as you had kissed his knuckles. “You’re cold.”

“Guess my personal heater isn’t working.” You teased.

“Come here.” Tom beckoned you closer to him. You slid into his side, snuggling into his warm embrace. With his arm hanging around your shoulders, you slipped your fingers through his, smiling at the ease of it all.

“I wish we could stay like this forever.” You mumbled, looking at the beauty of the lake and the sunset before you. It was like a scene from a painting, a scene you wanted to memorize forever.

Tom pressed a kiss to your forehead, pulling you in closer to him. “We can stay here as long as you’d like, darling.”

[onestowatch]

19 LGBTQIA+ Artists You Need to Listen to This PRIDE

PRIDE is all about self-empowerment and self-determination. It’s about not just being comfortable with who you are but showing the world that there is pride to be found in being unapologetically you. And that’s why, this PRIDE, we wanted to shine a light on a small handful of our favorite LGBTQIA+ artists. Ranging from rapturous hyperpop, revelatory bossa nova meditations, romantic rave music, and everywhere in between, these are 19 LGBTQIA+ artists who deserve a spot on your PRIDE playlist and every playlist for that matter. 

girl in red

In her debut single, “i wanna be your girlfriend,” a teenage girl in red unapologetically sings of young queer love over a mesh of lofi production and jangly instrumentation that would come to define much of the bedroom pop genre. It is a standout moment of unrelenting honesty, and a serenely simple three-minute confession that would go on to strike a chord with millions who were afraid of what it meant to be something more than friends. Now, a few years later and following the release of her critically-acclaimed debut album, if i could make it go quiet, Ulven still writes with that same emotional honesty, putting forth every ounce of herself for the world to see. 

Meet Me @ The Altar

“the little lonely black alt girl i was in the 00s is living rn, she never even dared to hope she might see this 💖💖,” reads the top comment on Meet Me @ The Altar’s music video for their single “Garden.” It is a sentiment shared by much of the rising band’s fanbase, who are used to the mainstream alternative scene championing cis white males. Existing in the space between pop-punk and hardcore, Meet Me @ The Altar exists to challenge the notion that queer women of color don’t have a place in punk. And after penning a record deal with Fueled By Ramen, home to the likes of Paramore, Panic! at the Disco, and nearly every pop-punk band that made up your middle school playlist, chances are this is just the beginning for our new favorite punks.

THE BLOSSOM

For Lily Lizotte, better known as THE BLOSSOM, music exists as the synthesis and subsequent recontextualization of a host of past experiences. From the sound of their dad belting away in his home studio to stumbling upon niche Internet subgenres, THE BLOSSOM transforms all this and more into a sound that is instantly recognizable but impossible to perfectly place. The culmination of this host of influences takes sweeping sonic form on their debut EP, ‘97 BLOSSOM, a perfectly imperfect introduction to one of the most fascinating rising artists of recent memory.

BIMINI

You may recognize BIMINI as Bimini Bon-Boulash, the runner-up on the second season of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK. And now you should familiarize yourself with Bimini, brit-pop extraordinaire. Releasing their debut single “God Save This Queen” earlier this June, Bimini deftly channels late ‘90s brit-pop and punk to deliver a single that has us absolutely living for the ensuing chaos. Serving up multiple looks throughout its eye-catching music video, “God Save This Queen” is not just a non-binary anthem but a veritable 2021 lookbook.

Hope Tala

With a sound that falls somewhere between turn-of-the-century R&B and bossa nova, Hope Tala’s music is expectedly a dream given sonic form. Perhaps that’s why much of the UK singer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist’s music is able to so deftly weave imagery of love, heartache, and teenage fistfights into tightknit tracks that feel simultaneously transcendental and deeply personal. And with the release of her 2020 EP, Girl Eats the Sun, Hope Tala poses one all-important question, “Why have a life if you’re not going to do something crazy and make a difference in the world?” 

chloe moriondo

For much of chloe moriondo’s avid fanbase, watching her transform from budding ukulele sensation to pop-punk phenom very much meant watching her grow up. Getting her start on YouTube, moriondo's fanbase witnessed her evolve as both an artist and person. Coming out in the aptly titled “a ramble about self identity, growth, and being a lesbian,” to be a fan of the artist often feels like trading secrets with a close personal friend. It is a sentiment that rings all the more true upon delving into her debut album, Blood Bunny. Grappling with coming-of-age at the axis of empathic pop and euphoric pop-punk, Blood Bunny sees moriondo taking yet another impressive step forward.

Godford

Little is known about Godford beyond what can be garnered from a handful of interviews online and his succinct Spotify bio, and chances are he’s happier that way. The anonymous DJ and producer aims to make non-binary music that exists outside of the confines of genres, overly-simplified classifications, and even himself. What is important are the emotions his music hold and what his listeners take away. Fusing romanticism and rave in his debut album, Godford: Non Binary Place, the anonymous artist does just that. He provides a space that exists simultaneously everywhere and nowhere, like an ephemeral night spent out on the dancefloor with a stranger or close friend.

Joy Oladokun

Joy Oladokun is at the core of her music. It may at first glance appear to be a painfully obvious statement, but as her sincere songwriting seeps into every corner of your soul, it is a notion that becomes undeniable. In her major label debut, in defense of my own happiness, Oladokun writes with an unabashed authenticity, never turning a blind eye to the world around her. These shared reflections and recollections of life are often heartbreaking and uplifting in the same breath, but in their candidness, we can begin to piece together what it means to be human, imperfections and all.  

Allison Ponthier

Allison Ponthier may only have a handful of singles to her name, but her unmatched potential is clear as day. Raised in the outskirts of Dallas, Texas, Ponthier’s moving songwriting and emphatic vocal prowess speak to her country roots. Pair that country sensibility with some of the most pristine pop songwriting we have heard in quite some time, and you begin to understand just how exciting Ponthier is as a rising artist. With only two singles to date, there’s not much else we can say beyond do yourself a favor and play “Cowboy” on repeat.

Rina Sawayama

It feels like no hyperbole to call Rina Sawayama an inevitable pop icon. First garnering critical acclaim with singles like “Cherry” and her 2017 debut EP RINA, the Japanese-British singer-songwriter staked her name on her immaculate ability to capture all the glamour and larger-than-life appeal of early ‘00s pop. Building on what was a nostalgic yet forward-thinking vision, Sawayama returned with her 2020 eponymous full-length debut. From nu-metal, club beats, to veritable pop anthems, SAWAYAMA emerged as a genre-defying showcase of an avant-garde pop star.

Arlo Parks

Listening to Arlo Parks’ music is akin to sipping on a hot cup of chamomile tea as you watch the world slowly pass by your living room window. It is a testament to the British poet and singer-songwriter’s subtle yet beautiful way with words, the way in which each lyric serves as a glance into a tightly-held memory or passing observation. These poetic musings come to life in her debut album, Collapsed In Sunbeams, which layers lyrical revelations over some of the most tender R&B of recent memory. Parks’ is more than a must-listen; she feels like the birth of a new wave.

Claud

Claud has spent the past few years making a name for themselves in the indie pop world, and the culmination of it all arrives in their debut album, Super Monster. The acclaimed album sees Claud reckoning with coming-of-age and love with an irresistible charm. Pair that with a penchant for grounded, affective songwriting and infectious, dreamlike melodies and you have one of the best debuts of recent memory. In case you somehow need any further convincing that Claud is one to watch, Super Monster marks the debut release from Phoebe Bridgers’ Saddest Factory Records.

UMI

Equally as inspired by R&B and neo-soul as she is by her generation’s penchant for blurring genre lines, UMI and her music exist as a form of spiritual healing. Half-Black and half-Japanese, her work explores everything from identity to self-introspection, such as on the aptly-titled Introspection. It is a fondness for self-exploration that UMI delves headfirst into on her 2019 EP Love Language, a sublime blend of identity struggles, love, and anime that tackles the issue of always feeling like an other, never Black or Japanese enough.

Joesef

Sad boy summer. It’s the simplest way to being explaining Joesef’s serene albeit somber sound. Emerging out of Glasgow, the quickly rising star often wears his still bleeding heart on his sleeve, even when the underlying sonics seem to be moving onto greener pastures. It is an exquisite balancing act that comes to life on his 2020 EP, Does It Make You Feel Good?. Blending elements of soft-spoken R&B, jazz, and ethereal pop, Joesef sets himself apart as an artist whose influences and appeal know no bounds.

Serena Isioma

At the top of the year, we named Serena Isioma one of our top artists to watch in the year to come, and for good reason. The self-proclaimed “nonbinary rock star” experienced a breakout moment with “Sensitive,” a track that is difficult to perfectly encapsulate but think along the lines of fusing modern-day R&B and woozy indie-pop with reckless abandon, and you’ll be about halfway there. It was an impressive standout track that was only buoyed by a pair of EPs, Sensitive and The Leo Sun Sets, in 2020, officially cementing Isioma as an artist like no other.

Khai Dreams

Khai Dreams’ music is effortlessly easygoing. With its straightforward guitar lines and understated production, every track from the Pacific Northwest singer-songwriter flows out as naturally as breathing. Maybe it’s that laid-back approach that begins to explains Khai Dreams’ universal appeal and millions of monthly listeners, despite releasing most of his music independently. A hallmark of the DIY generation and its massive homebrewed potential, it would be a crying shame if you didn’t let Khai Dream’s serene meditations transport you somewhere far from here.

Frances Forever

Like much of their Gen Z cohorts, Frances Forever’s exponential rise was not the result of a well-executed marketing plan but by the pure chance of a single song finding a home online. The song in question, “Space Girl,” was originally part of NPR’s Tiny Desk Content before soon blowing up on TikTok, and it’s not hard to see why. Short, sweet, and to the point, “Space Girl” is a saccharine love letter to that bubbly feeling of floating on cloud nine. Now signed to Mom+Pop and with their debut EP, Paranoia Party, due out later this year, this is the perfect time to get familiar with Frances Forever.

Dorian Electra

Unapologetically playing with gender norms and stereotypes while seeing just how far they can push the limits of pop, Dorian Electra has long maintained a cult following in the world of experimental, highly addictive hyperpop. And it’s not hard to see why. Having collaborated with the likes of Charli XCX, 100 gecs, Village People, Pussy Riot, Rebecca Black, and more, Electra’s music ranges from off-the-rails hyperpop to introspective pop slow burns. All of this and more reaches a fever pitch in their 2020 album My Agenda, a devious showcasing of one of pop’s most explosive figures.

MAY-A

Maya Cumming, professionally known as MAY-A, is no stranger to the hustle it takes to make it in the music industry. The Australian artist got her start entering numerous singing competitions in her hometown of Byron Bay and started busking on the streets at the tender age of 11. Now, she has a breakout single under her belt in the form of “Apricots,” an anthemic indie-pop ode to queer love. And since that breakout moment, MAY-A has continued to release impressive single after single—the latest being the collaborative “American Dream.”

[ghostbustermelanieking]

📓!!

i've posted about this idea before a million times, but: archivist melanie fic. i've had this idea for such a long time, and i would love to riff on it if i ever get the motivation.

so the basic premise of this ends up being a semi melanie-jon role swap, but: essentially jon does not work at the institute, and melanie comes in to give her statement sooner. (her statement takes place in january of 2015, so this actually sort of works?? but i'd probably mess with the timeline so melanie has her encounter with the slaughter, and ghost hunt uk breaks up, sooner.) elias doesn't see a clear candidate for the archivist after murdering gertrude -- he's considering tim, he's considering rosie, but no one feels like a clear fit... but then he meets melanie, who isn't exactly a perfect fit, but... she's doubly marked, by the slaughter and the stranger. and with the drive she has for investigation, it seems like it would be easy to orchestrate twelve more.

so melanie takes the archivist job, with sasha, tim, and martin as her assistants (just because), and her approach ends up even more focused on investigation than jon's. (she refuses to look into the most outlandish ones -- she's still as skeptical of the institute as she is in canon -- but there's plenty grounded in evidence that she's ready to investigate.) tim and sasha fall into this easily, of course, with their experience in research, and they all end up more or less bonding, because why not (melanie canonically liked sasha, and was friends with martin, and i think she would've gotten along better with tim under better circumstances...). georgie, of course, is still close with melanie, and ends up being much more involved with things, and while the institute initially seems like a good thing for melanie -- a new opportunity and a chance to find closure -- it also ends up being a little frightening as time goes on, as melanie's eye powers start to develop, and the slaughter starts to take a greater hold on her...

so in this au, jon comes into the story when he's convinced (either by coincidence, by georgie, or by the web) to give a statement about mr. spider. there's little to no evidence, and melanie would probably dismiss it if it wasn't for the fact that a) jon is friends with georgie, or used to be friends with georgie, and b) the fact that martin and jon immediately hit it off, and martin pushes to investigate more. they can't find anything about jon's statement, but they do decide to look into more spider statements to see if there's a connection. specifically, first, the carlos vittery case. which martin and melanie go to investigate together. and this time, instead of martin, jane prentiss follows the archivist home.

melanie is trapped for a few days with her phone gone. but this time, people get clued in faster -- partially because georgie, who texts with melanie all the time, knows that prentiss's texts are nothing like melanie, and partially because martin was there at the basement with her. they manage to break her out after a few days. melanie ends up staying with georgie instead of in the institute because georgie insists ("you're not staying in the office, melanie; i'll be fine"). jon finds out about this through georgie and, despite the tension he and melanie had when he gave his statement, he calls to apologize. (and is more or less adopted into this strange little circle because of his connection with georgie, and his new tentative friendship with martin.)

the prentiss attack goes very similarly, except for one thing: when the dust has settled, and melanie is getting patched up in an ambulance outside, and tim and martin start hugging a strange woman and calling her sasha... melanie sees through it. she sees through it, and can't say anything, because the others won't believe her, and the not!sasha knows it, keeps smirking at melanie over their shoulders. that isn't sasha, and something has happened to her.

melanie tells georgie, convinces georgie to believe her. they go back into the archives while it is empty (everyone on leave) and tear it apart, looking for references to what this is. (melanie remembers the amy patel statement, but wants more information...) eventually they find the statement from mag 78, the one with adelard dekker. they put together the pieces about the table. melanie goes to tim and martin, and they don't believe her, but she convinces them to come with her, to just see the table, and that's when they destroy it, releasing sasha and letting the not!them loose all at once.

(yes, sasha lives in this au; not because melanie is the archivist, but just because i don't wanna kill sasha, shhh)

there is the canon-typical not-sasha chase, with a sasha that only melanie recognizes along for the ride. jurgen leitner still shows up and traps it, but melanie refuses his offers to talk. none of them want answers, at this point, after prentiss and the not!them; they just want out. they go to elias to try and quit, and are unable to, of course. (even after melanie threatens him with a letter opener.) they are trapped, for now.

everyone takes their time off, although none of them really stay away; tim and martin and georgie are all waiting for their memories of sasha to go right, and after tim and melanie's wounds heal a little, they're meeting almost daily to try and figure out how to leave the institute. but in all the confusion and exhaustion and trauma, one thing all of them forget to do is fill in jon. (how can they? strange spiders and worms are one thing, but this... it all seems a little much.) this ends up being a mistake when, on everyone's first day back to the archives, elias announces a new coworker. he shows jon down, who looks confused and maybe even a little hurt when everyone loudly protests. elias smiles at melanie and tells her it's a shame they can't bring that host of what the ghost on -- that she would surely be a valuable resource to the archives as well.

so i'm not sure where the fic goes from here; in my mind, it's always cut off with elias essentially hiring jon as a hostage to keep the others under control. with the 197 reveal that the web hand picked jon as the archivist, though... i did have a new idea for a continuation. one where, in a sped up timeline with the revelations of s2 and early s3 having come in about a week -- and with the web's chosen archivist finally in the institute -- the web starts to orchestrate situations where jon gets marked alongside melanie. and it catches things before they progress too far. it shows melanie eric delano's tape instead of steering her away -- like it did jon -- in the hopes that melanie will blind herself to get free of the institute. so that the archivist position will be open for jon.