#What comes on whatsapp
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#homestuck#hom3stuck#hom24uck#dirk strider#roxy lalonde#sona#strilonde#strilondes#admin draws#fanart#doodles moderately grouped by theme that i keep forgetting to fkn post#im currently in the proces of getting sick and i have a presentation tomorrow that i already had a fucking nightmare abotu#and people wont stop messanging me on whatsapp despite it being SUNDAY NIGHT#tldr im just about to end it all. enjoy the dirks though#also my sona looks way too similar to roxy im realizing just. keep in mind one has big round glasses and the other doesnt#bonus late additions. idk what id call these but its like thoughts that pop into my head randomly almost every day#daily affirmations? is it intrusive thoughts if its this benign? it feels like they just come out of nowhere on their own#its like im pretty sure its me just coming back to them passively so i dont think its thought insertions. whatever.#self#TTAC
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I once triggered wyll's romance scene where he looks like a dumb bird doing one of their weird courting dances, and haven't been able to think of him in any other way since.
Astarion may be a black cat, but wyll is a fucking riflebird
#The scene was also bugged and for half of it I couldn't understand what was happening because the camera was inside a crate#Keep in mind I was coming from getting together with astarion#Then going to gale and telling him fuck astarion let's ditch him and run away together#And basically all together making the worst possible choices in every situation#I was laughing hysterically by that point#I have whatsapp audios with my friends when this was happening where I sound MANIC#baldur’s gate 3#baldur's gate 3#bg3#wyll ravengard#bg3 wyll#Wyll#wyll x tav#bg3 memes
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yeah new favourite little guy. no don't look in my reblogs.
#oh my god the HELL i went through trying to upload this#i tried to upload it but the file size was too big so i uploaded it at a lower quality but then it gave me an ERROR#i tried saving it as like. 7 different files#NONE of them worked#turns out#csp was doing some weird rendering thing#but it was only completing it halfway#so the files were all fucked up#and i had to SEND MYSELF the jpeg via my whatsapp group with only me in it#and then DOWNLOAD IT so it would be a different image#but it ended up coming out low quality#so i redownloaded one of the previous jpegs i exported (but from gallery this time) but it didnt work bc it was the same file#so i saved the post with the low quality whatsapp download to my drafts#and then i went back to my drafts#and guess what#the quality was fine#anyway#rant over#look at him#chainsaw man#angel csm#csm angel#chainsaw man angel#angel chainsaw man#artists on tumblr#digital art#my art#fanart#art#chainsaw man fanart
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carraville core beliefs (aka things I am Always keeping in mind when writing them)
Gary:
always busy. always talking. genuinely one of the most annoying people alive. his friends often mute him on whatsapp
easily bribed with chocolate
too rich to have any concept of what things should cost or how anything works
has a Type and that type is tall muscular men
related to his type: likes to be Held. (make of that what you will)
was in love with becks when they were young and everyone who knows him knows this
Jamie:
very much a lads lad and so probably a bit of a bastard but unconsciously acts soft around Gary
loud and over the top especially when he's joking around. VERY touchy-feely but only with people he's comfortable with
does not like sweets. does not like coffee.
loves a paycheck
doesn't have a type he's just insane about Gary. so insane about him that he doesnt necessarily have to actually like men at all to like HIM
completely utterly whipped
as a pair:
always the most insane people in any room they're in and always the most intense
bullying is their love language and they're suspicious if they're being nice to each other
genuinely stupidly fond of each other. what was it I said the other day they just delight each other so much
the reason they delight each other/click so well is BECAUSE they're always the two most insane people in any room they're in
everything is a competition and once they're together they STAY together bc they are both determined to Win at their relationship
#thank u for coming to my ted talk#(also for gary core belief that he has the same genre of autism as me but that is implied)#comtext for some of these: nicky butt literally said in co92 that he muted gary on whatsapp#the other gary stuff is just all like actually literally true like we know this#cant remember when jamie said he doesnt like sweets but he said in his overlap interview that he doesnt like coffee#often in my fics he will get gary coffee and i am always careful to never say that hes got HIMSELF coffee#touchy feely only when he's comfortable comes from him saying on cbs that he doesnt like being touched#vs everything he ever does ever when around gary#him being a bastard i just know in my heart to be true. him going soft around gary well we all have eyes#needing to win at their relationship comes from sara's fic obviously. that is The fic summary of all time#carraville#oh yeah the likes to be held make of that what you will bit obviously is me implying that i think hes a bottom.#but we all already know that too
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pata hai last kuch din i was very busy with my project kyunki final dena tha and binding karni thi etc to wo karwayi then i went to the bookfair bekaar tha then parso submit karne jaa rahi to subah accident hogaya (bhai ki bike skid hogayi and we fell down) and now i have a big ass blue bruise on my upper thigh and my parents don't even know lmao and kal ek science conference thi to i had to sit in an auditorium for 6 hours listening to accomplished people speak. that's what you missed now your turn
omg i knew everything in this except for the accident cause i stalk your blog vigorously everyday are you okay!!!!!!!!!! did you get tetanus shots!!!!!!!!!! also on your upper thigh oh no that's where future jiju is supposed to write MINE na as per our beloved song guilty as sin?
#did u have fun at the conference it must've been cool huh women in stem and all that#bookfair being bad is so sucky i was so excited for you to go i thought you'd send pictures too of books we like#also u already know everything i posted everything and every thought#i ate chinese but it didn't feel that good because my sister isn't here and we didn't eat it together watching#koffee or splitsvilla and i realised that it's not just the chinese food it's the whole hanging out that i love sm :((#kal well i told you pata hai the brownie place we met it's kinda new and cool types so uske bathroom mein#there was a button and it said press at your own risk and when we did it became a dj like the lights went out and#there when flashing spinning disco lights and party songs were playing mere mein wo aaya hum toh naye andaz hai apna purana#it was sooo cool im adding it to the list of places you'll visit when u come here!!!!!!!#also the food was soooo shockingly reasonably priced everything was under 200 rs!!!!! which is big for a dessert place here#and like great quantity great taste too my stupid people from office used to say it's awesome but i didn't believe them and never tried it#because they're all losers lol but i grudgingly admit that they were right#also ummmm hmm okay pata hai i realised ki oh okay im happy with who i am#like bachpan mein i used to feel very sad and loser like because dad was too strict to let me go out raat ko and everyone in school would#go to this club we went to kal and i always felt i was missing out and i wanted to be all cool and fun too#but it was kinda so boring and normal and i was like wow okay i didn't miss out i was spending days and nights reading books being in#fandoms and i was actually very happy!!!!! so like yay idk small thing bt yk i realised that oh it was okay and everything will be okay too#i kinda want to talk to that guy now like i weirdly feel like im longing for what could've been? which is ridiculous because#we were 11 and i barely talked to him back then because shy and friends would tease and i didn't realise it was a crush#i don't want to DATE him because like tbh i already know we're very different people but like wouldn't it be fun to idk make out once#then i got the urge to download dating app but i resisted the urge and won i don't think im made for casual things#me and my bestie were laughing about this yesterday too she was like i just don't understand how people can have sex one day and then#not give a fuck about each other the next day like idk if we have sex im having your kids and i was like ikrrrr like bhai sex is toh very#big im going to be attached if we hug i literally did!!!!! so we decided no more casual/situationships for us#phew okay more rambling on whatsapp love u bye this became too long#saumyuuuuuu
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do you know what its something that i hate. teachers that are pieces of shit and take a big part of your grade because the person you had to work with didnt do their part and because of that you said hey. ill do all myself!!! just gotta add that they didnt work!!!! and the teacher says fuck you get a 70 this is what you get for not doing every single possible way of communication with your partner to get them to write one (1) one thing in this paper
#mind you i had been sending emails over and over and over AND OVER to this person and they just. ignored it.#<- i study online#<- we are in fucking university come ON MAN JUST READ THE EMAILS#i even asked on the whatsapp group if they had their number!!! no one had it!!!#and then in the class!!! the piece of shit says!!!! sorry i didnt see the activity but eh we got a 70 right? KILL YOURSE#studyblr#uniblr#uni life#even more of a piece of shit of a teacher bcs ???? what the fuck???? so alllllll my research gets me less of a grade of what i deserve#but this fucker gets a 70 FOR FREEE#and my teacher has the audacity to send ME an email saying well you shouldve tried to yknow. get them to work!#HOW????? HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO GET THEM TO WORK IF IM JUST YELLING AT A VOID WITHOUT GETTING AN ANSWER???????#I EVEN ADDED ON THE ACTIVITY THAT I WASNT ABLE TO CONTACT THEM BEFORJANkdsfdsmahf#hipster looking ass teacher when you go to the barber shop your hair WILL get fucked#you WILL have a ugly fade and your glasses will crack#I hate this teacher so much this isnt even all that he has done and its been only 4 weeks#i need this man to be struck down by zeus rays and for him to never wake up again#college#university#study#<- study mentioned but i feel my will to study go bye bye thanks to this man
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the upside definitely is that its physically impossible to feel lonely under these conditions. which considering the wave of loneliness im usually feeling around november is awesome. yayy 👍
#like i wake up and my roommates friend (who tbh at this point is also my friend) is there for breakfast. we have breakfast. he leaves.#im on my own for like 2 hrs. then im coming up for the birthday lunch and spend the whole afternoon there.#now i have 1 hr until im leaving for the party. like what da hell#and i cannot isolate myself tomorrow cause i have already planned to go iceskating with people. what is going on truly#oh also friday technically i didnt hang out with anyone#but a guy texted me randomly cause he spotted my polish number in a bigger local student whatsapp group. and we texted for like 3 hrs#so that was also in a way a social moment. i think next weekend im fr going on a lockdown and refusing to talk to anyone for at least a day#thots
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next year when my phone contract runs out i swear i swear and promise i’m getting a flippy nokia i can’t do this anymore my brain is so melted i can’t do it. i want my brain back. i will still go on the computer though of course
#i know ive said this before but i need to keep the momentum going lol#i havent managed to find the 4G nokia flip which i WOULD like because#my family and friends all use whatsapp lol#but we’ll see what’s available when the time comes
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I just had a very enlightening experience!
Having just watched the new Jaiden video about her ADHD, it gave me thoughts.
I found it very relatable how she felt like she had things under control in her formative years compared to her current self that made her feel like she fell off after leaving high school. How she remembered being well organized and put together as a child but couldn't conjure up that same motivation and work ethic in her adult years. I felt that.
And how even after getting the idea that she might have ADHD, she put off getting diagnosed because of that mental back-and-forth of "oh maybe, oh maybe not". I'm feeling that
I'm at a point where while I am aware that I am some degree of neurodivergent, but don't know how much. And I'm also hesitant with getting a proper diagnosis because I don't know how to explain this to my parents.
It honestly does feel relieving how some of my experiences is/has also been experienced by a person I've looked up to for a long time, it feels validating.
#“dino rambles a bit”#vent post#jaiden animations#being on the internet for as long as i have and being fairly acquainted with the communities i'm in#it doesn't take all that long to suspect that i am a degree of neurodivergent#minimally searching up adhd symptoms on google and reading what comes up first and going “ah but i've never been all that hyperactive even-#-if i get really talkative and loud about the things i like“ adhd-laden imposter syndrome be like#but finding out that there are multiple types of adhd did help#anyways. needed to vent a little. i feel more comfortable saying things here than my whatsapp statuses#tumblr has been my online diary for a bit. it really shouldn't be but it feels nice
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okay one of my flatmates is really fucking starting to piss me off lmao
#i am away for. Four days.#i come back. 10 pm. the shared compost bin i washed and left to dry in the rack the day before i left is still where i put it. instead of#moving it (Extremely Simple Fucking Action) she has chosen to dry her dishes by balancing them on the rim of the sink. the sink itself has#food scraps in it. jars with bits of food still in are standing on the counter and i know from experience i'll snap and bring those#to the recycling bins before she does. i start scrubbing things because leaving My Kitchen unclean upsets me on a molecular level and she#walks by and all she says is a grunted hello#and i could tolerate this ALL FINE i could think ah she's just busy probably! but when other flatmate (beloved) and i attempted to initiate#a chore chart system so that kitchen and bathroom get regularly and properly cleaned#at the end of the month she was like well i hate kitchen duty because i don't think i should have to clean up your messes. i cleaned the#kitchen once this month and an hour later it was dirty again. woman 1. sorry for fucking using the kitchen 2. you cleaned the kitchen ONCE?#in a MONTH? 3. you did not fucking clean up our messes. i know for a fucking fact i was putting away your dishes on a daily basis i would#looove to know what the fuck you considered cleaning up my mess#anyway. long story short thank fucking christ she's moving out at the end of spring semester otherwise i'd snap and write her a very#pettily snide whatsapp message
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I went from I've been kind of sick since last week but I'm not sicksick to oh, look who's got a fever yesterday and am consequently spending today in bed.
#text post#i of course now feel guilty for not working because is it really that bad? i could do something easy and light at least!#which is exactly why i have never asked it support to help set up my laptop with a remote connection to my work pc#my team and a few select other people at work have me on whatsapp in case they really need me#but i know that if i could log on from home i simply. would not rest.#i'm bad enough when it comes to not interrupting my lunch break to work#(“oh a new mail let me just quickly check what it's about”#“incoming call? whose number is this? is it important?”#“a knock on the locked door? at break time? maybe it's something time-sensitive!”)#if i had access to my work mail and files from home i would not be able to separate working and non-working hours#and the fact that i'm sitting here feeling guilty and that i absolutely could do some light work rn is probably proof#that i am not to be trusted with remote access
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#i feel so so stupid#the person in question is a man and i'll name him dan#like a month ago i accepted dan's friend request on facebook because we're both members of an ace attorney group#he's an admin in the group and posts very often. he draws nice and his memes are funny#he sent me a text in messenger out of the blue after liking a post of me where i was sad about my situation as an uni student and blah blah#i thanked him and i thought that'd be all but he texted me again and i'm not someone who ignores people just like that so i kept replying#but because i'm an idiot i gave him my whatsapp number so now he texts me every day#dan doesn't look like a bad man but... i've started to feel uncomfortable when talking to him#he says things like 'you're pretty' 'i like drawing your hair' and i just nod and smile because UGH.#I'M TOO NICE AND I DON'T HAVE IT IN MY TO TELL HIM I DON'T LIKE IT#he's like 30 y/o and from another country and he is going bald... 💀#i checked his old pictures on his profile and i want to know what the heck happened for him to age poorly#if i'm honest... i don't really want to talk to him again but how should i tell him? i know the solution is:#'it's been nice getting to know you but you make me uncomfortable and you're old and bald. you shouldn't be texting a 22 y/o woman. bye'#but the stupid part of my brain that is doing all the thinking is afraid of confronting dan and coming off as a brat#yet i know i owe him nothing and should speak up...#*deep sigh*#personal
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What♪
#parents just told me that they adopted two adult sons from palestine??#and that the real parents are coming#my parents wanted the oldest two marry into the family#the problem is i'm the only girl☠️#just another reason why i feel suffocated living with my parents lol#i don't. like. men.#i don't like arranged marriages#and nowadays the feeling of being abnormal is becoming stronger idk i'm foolish#personal#my mother just asked me via whatsapp if i would be willing to wear niqab if 'my husband told me to'#i said no#she said 'i should heed my husband's command because a married woman's heaven is with the husband not the parents anymore'#what kind of world does she live in...#she wanted to be an arab it seems... idk#i think it's fine if she wanted to but please don't drag someone unwilling#alldlwkdheoanahjsooowushsusskskekwoejhsie#is this even normal#idk what is normal#she wants an obedient daughter 'anak nurut' but unfortunately she got me#sigh#愚痴#ただの愚痴#悔しい逃げたい消えたい
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HOW CAN MY DAY KEEP GETTING EVEN WORSE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
#I WAS GONNA WATCH THIS MOVIE THAT I RLLY LIKE ON TWT BC THEY HAD IT THERE AND THE POST WAS DELETED NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#how could this happen....... and why...........#well yk what? FINE!!!!! instead i'll just make my dreams come true and change my whatsapp icon to me/bede and marnie. wtv
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first family member I mention the back pain to is immediately like "so now what, you're sad? You want me to feel sorry?"
thanks this is why I spent the last 5 days in crippling pain all by myself
#i could barely move without my back spasming all over the place#couldn't even sit or lie down without pain#it's a bit less now but still constantly there#but sure yeah i'm just complaining because i want attention#that's why i told...no one??????????#(in the family at least)#anyway my family is currently arguing on whatsapp about what time my dad is gonna come pick up me and my brother tomorrow#because my brother forgot about the already agreed upon time#i'm soooooooo looking forward to easter celebrations tomorrow 🫠
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what kind of rancid vibes must i be giving off today that literally nobody is replying to my messages😐🤨
#im not even saying that for anyone to take pity on me#also unrelated but im sweating like a pig rn and im in the cellar tucked into bed w the windows open#not one single drop of air is coming thru#back to what i was saying. im still waiting for a reply from the friend who i hadnt spoken to in yrs and i managed for her to reply to me#she even said we could meet etc etc#i also texted another friend today-one from the village who ill hopefully see this coming week#told her i was coming and asked to make sure she was gonna be here certain days. texted 6hrs ago and still nothing#in fact her phone hasnt even received them so either shes had no wifi all day long bc shes at home and cant steal#our other friends wifi anymore (she changed her wifi password) or something haopened to her. i might have to tect our other friend tomorrow#text*#also had a nice convo w somebody else and im still waiting for them to reply bc the convo was left mid air kinda#yesterday night my friend sent me one of those one time only photos on whatsapp#i replied today and it was her and this other friend we had at the dorms. ig they saw each other for sant lorient which is cool#she also hasnt replied. ig shes busy partying or catching up w sleep but idk man. still#being left on read/unanswered AT ONCE by so many ppl has me feeling like shit ngl#z xarre
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