#Whaaat. Who said that last tag there? Hm?

[novadragoness]

I think the BG3 community is sleeping on Deep Gnomes, tbh.

Especially Deep Gnomes with medium armor mastery???

The wisdom save advantage is awesome. [Especially on a Durge, but there are still so many Wisdom saves regardless of if you're a Tav or a Durge] Early ones, like the harpies. Late ones I don't wanna spoil on main. But like. Wisdom saves, specifically saves, it is absolutely rock and roll to have that at an advantage.

Now, you could go Rogue, or Gloomstalker, or some other such sneaky class to utilize the Stealth Advantage, but let me present an alternative as well.

Most medium and heavy armors make sneaking virtually a no-go for most characters. Even if they have good stealth or dex, disadvantage sucks the feasibility right out. But listen, Advantage cancels out Disadvantage. A Deep Gnome in heavy armor is just as sneaky as a similarly stated elf or a human is in light armor.

And if they're in Medium Armor and take the Medium Mastery Feat? That gives them their advantage back.

Imagine you're out there, being a villain, committing nefarious evils... and suddenly, out of nowhere, a very angry Paladin in full on golden Adamantine armor is just. Directly behind you. No warning.

You're getting smited. There's no time to dodge, you are simply going to be smote. That's just how it is.

Wisdom Save Advantage + Stealth Advantage + Superior Darkvision ???

You're unstoppable, basically. Nobody can hide from you, you can hide from everybody, and the baddies have one heck of a time trying to get into your head.

[And the short camera angles are fun. And they have cool ears.]

[spaceyflowerswriting]

pt 1/4: little changes (gun park x reader)

...except the main character is goo and reader only plays a role in little dialogue. hear me out.

details: fluffy oneshot, gender neutral reader written in 2nd pov, general canon au, you and gun have been dating for a while in secret

summary: goo starts to notice little changes in gun, influenced by you. the thing is, gun is keeping his relationship on the low, so here are goo's antics of being annoying and trying to find out who you are.

a/n: i wrote this quite a while back before i joined the fandom with this public account but still like it so i wanted to share it :]

×

"You don't usually wear colorful clothes, do you?"

"Not really. Why're you asking?"

"Oh. Well, I was thinking about how nice this shirt would look on you--"

"I'll get it."

"Wait, you don't have to--"

. . .

"Why do you have so many collared shirts?"

"They're the only shirts I wear," replied Gun, quickly adding, "And stop looking through my closet."

"No, I'm bored. And I won't stop until you hurry the hell up."

Gun sifted through the folders he had scattered about on the table he was standing by. "I can't afford to make a mistake so shut up and be patient."

Goo hummed over him, ignoring and not even hearing the last part of his sentence. "Ooh, more brightly colored clothes! I didn't know you had more. You always wear bland colors." A certain shirt caught Goo's eyes and he picked it out. "Whaaat? What is this? Did you really buy a tacky shirt like this?"

He held up the white shirt--light blue stripes and colorful flowers decorating it--just as Gun glanced over his shoulder to see. He turned away just as fast though, and Goo didn't get to see his expression.

All he got was Gun saying, "As if your clothes aren't tacky?" and then muttering, "Besides, it's a nice shirt."

"My fashion is better than yours." Goo rolled his eyes and went back to staring at the shirt in disbelief. "Also, this is kind of cute, but it's so gross to see in your closet. Why'd you buy a shirt like this? How expensive--" He gasped, seeing the tag on the back inside of the shirt's collar. "This isn't even from a rich brand! Did you buy this at... a normal mall or something?!"

"You sound utterly ridiculous right now. Stop spouting nonsense."

Goo hung the shirt back up, yelling back, "I'm serious! Do you secretly have a strange fashion taste or something?"

Gun sighed heavily. "Why does that even matter? Just go back to being quiet, I still need to focus."

"Alright, alright, just so we can get out of your boring ass house quicker." Goo continued to look through Gun's closet, being more shocked at other articles of clothing he found. Really, just anything that was brightly colored or had some kind of pattern on it.

"What a weirdo... what other secrets is this guy hiding from me aside from his weird fashion taste?"

~

"You look good like that."

"Hm?"

"Not beat up, I mean your hair. Whoever you got in a fight with that messed up your hair, they sure did it stylishly."

. . .

Goo raised a brow, watching Gun mess up his hair he always meticulously slicked back again. It was always by giving himself bangs over his right eye but leaving the rest of his hair mostly slicked back. Almost like he was purposefully styling it that way...? It must've been for someone else and not himself though, because he always complained about the inconvenience having bangs. When the hell did Gun ever do anything for someone else, though?

The blonde shrugged it off and turned back to look at himself in the bathroom mirror, fixing his own hair that got a little messy from a fight they both just finished. Once satisfied, he nodded to himself and smiled before looking over at Gun again.

He had just popped a piece of gum into his mouth and then looked up when he noticed Goo staring.

"What," he said dryly.

Well, since he was asking, Goo wasn't going to shrug it off this time. He was never the type to beat around the bush anyway. "What's up with you, lately? As far as I know, you hate having your hair in your face because it's annoying, especially in a fight, but lately after the end of the day, you always mess it up. Why?"

"Changed my mind," was the only short response he could get.

"Why?" Goo continued to press.

"I don't need to look professional or think about getting into fights when my job for the day is done, correct?"

"Hm." Suspicious, but Goo would take it as an answer for now. Plus, Gun most likely would be too stubborn to answer truthfully no matter how much Goo chose to be annoying.

Instead, he brought his attention to the gum pack Gun was holding in his hand. "How about the gum? What's up with that?"

Gun held it up, seemingly playing dumb like he was asking sarcastically, "Oh, this?" He tucked it into his pocket shortly after, questioning, "Is it illegal to chew gum in South Korea all of a sudden?"

Goo clicked his tongue. "You never chew gum. You hate sweets and chewy things."

At that, Gun went quiet and Goo immediately became even more suspicious about him. Still, he replied after a moment with, "Guess I changed my mind about that, too."

"Sure you did." Goo rolled his eyes and then held out a hand. "Give me a piece, by the way."

"Fuck off." Gun walked past him and Goo quickly slapped his back with the hand he had out. 

He followed after Gun as they exited the bathroom, exclaiming, "Hey! Be grateful I don't feel like pressuring you for answers to your weird habits lately. I at least deserve a piece of gum for that."

"I don't owe you anything."

Goo grabbed Gun's collar for that, threats about to spill out of his sharp tongue until he saw a fear-ridden employee in the distance, clutching on the mop in their hands for dear life.

"Oops, forgot we were in a McDonalds." Goo made a girlish giggle and then waved casually at the employee as Gun continued to deadpan, just chewing on his gum. "Hi! Don't mind us, we won't cause any trouble here." Goo started dragging Gun out by his collar. "Have a good day, random civilian!"

The employee just watched them leave with wide eyes.

~

"Wow, no cigarettes today?"

"You said the smoke bothered you."

"Ah, right. Thanks for being considerate!"

"Of course."

. . .

"Gum again?" asked Goo, returning from the convenience store.

Gun ignored him.

"Come on, let me have a piece this t--" Goo was answered with a small sting in the face, a piece of gum thrown at him with lightning speed. He frowned, hand swiping to catch the gum before it fell to the ground. "You piece of shit."

"You got what you wanted."

Goo shook his head, beginning to unwrap it. "What flavor is this?"

"Orange."

"Orange!" repeated Goo gleefully, happily placing the gum in his mouth as he balled up the wrapper. He walked closer to Gun and leaned back on the wall with him before lazily flicking the balled wrapper at his partner's head, who made zero reaction. "Didn't think you liked fruity flavors. I thought you would pick mint or something."

"Either flavor is fine."

"Hmph." Goo pouted. "Fruity flavors are too sweet and don't fit a guy like you at all." He paused for a moment. "But I guess it's fine since you're fruity!" Goo laughed at his own joke as Gun rolled his eyes, hands tucking into his pockets.

"Did you buy what you needed?"

"Yeah, we heading back already?"

"It's been a long day." Gun let out a deep sigh. "Let's go."

He was already walking off before Goo could reply. "Jeez, you've been so eager to return home these days." He pushed himself off the wall with a, "Hup!" and tailed Gun, peeking over his shoulder. "What, you got a sweetheart waiting for you at home or something?"

Gun ignored him. Again.

Goo decided to change the topic since what he suggested probably wasn't true anyway. Gun, falling in love? Someone else feeling mutual love for a pervert like him? What a joke!

"Hey, hey, I've noticed you stopped smoking, too."

"And?"

"I thought you liked smoking."

"Not particularly."

"Huh? Why even smoke then?"

"It relieves stress."

"Okay, sooo..." Goo whistled. "You stopped smoking because now you don't feel stress anymore?"

"Stop asking questions."

Gun's harsher-than-usual tone (because he almost always sounded harsh) irritated Goo to no end, so he quipped, "Sounds like SOMEONE'S stressed."

"Really got the crowd laughing with that one."

"This fucking guy..."

Goo shoved his hands in his pockets before they could start swinging. "Are you replacing smoking with chewing gum or something as a stress reliever? Like a recovering smoke-a-holic or whatever?"

Ignored by Gun for the third time in under five minutes.

Goo decided to let it go. Just for tonight.

[starrysupercell]

This is a request from over on AO3, where I'm sharing my works there too. I'll be alternating between the requests, as there's a list on both sides now. This user requested Edgar and Colette, with a surprise theme!

And it might be the new thing... where I get too carried away and just write a full set up for a story, lmao. But here we go!

~🧣~Darker Interests ~❣~

Edgar leaned back in his chair, bored out of his mind. The graveyard shift was quiet, which he usually had no qualms with, but his phone had died around half an hour ago, so he couldn't even entertain himself for the last leg of his shift.

Actually focusing on work? As if.

The little bell above the door rung, and he shifted from leaning back to slumping forward on the counter, holding his head up in his hand. "Welcome," he half-heartedly greeted.

The customer grinned widely. "Hiya!" She said, waving very excitedly.

Edgar gave her a look. Who greets people like that?

The girl broke into fits of giggles, and her only visible eye darted around, clutching a book to her chest. She had white hair that covered one eye, and a very odd sense of style. Her shirt's sleeves were so long they covered her hands.

"Oh, a corner store. Very nice." She said, slipping behind an aisle.

'I wonder what she's on,' Edgar wondered. He looked back down. Whatever. It wasn't really his job to care about the customers. Just a couple more hours until morning shift gets here...

A few minutes later, he heard some sirens from down the street and casually glanced out the glass door. 'I guess I'll read about that in the morning.'

The girl was pressed against the window, looking at the flashing lights. She peeled herself away from the glass and came up to the counter. Her arms were full of cheesy chips, sweets, beef jerky and drinks.

'Weed, huh?' Edgar thought as he began to scan the items. 'She doesn't reek of it though.'

"That'll be 16.73." Edgar told her.

She reached into her pocket, and then frowned. She looked down to her book. "You were supposed to..." and shook her head.

The girl smiled at him. "Well, I forgot to bring the money." She explained sheepishly, "Is there any way you'd be interested in a deal?"

"Uhh.... Cash or card only." Edgar said, feeling uncomfortable.

"I'm not that type." She shook her head. "Two favors, of your choice! Haha, eight dollars for one! What a steal!" She laughed before refocusing. "So how about it, Edgar?"

"Sure, yeah. Okay. A deal." The worker said. "Let me just bag these for you." Edgar said, completing that as quickly as he could.

The white-haired girl grinned. "Thanks! I've been wanting to try these."

Edgar pushed the bag towards her. "There you go. Have... a night."

"Bye-Bye, Edgar!" She waved, walking to the door. The bell rung, and the door closed.

Edgar exhaled. God, the worst night to forget his charger at home. He cancelled the order on the register and decided to make a note to the manager on what was lost.

There was no way that he was gonna try to argue with that lunatic. What were they gonna do, fire him? He was the only one who wanted to work night shift.

Edgar grabbed a piece of paper from the printer, and a pen near the cash register to write the note. He was halfway done when he suddenly realized something and froze. His gaze trailed back towards the register.

His name tag he never bothered to put on that night laid right beside it.

That.... girl somehow knew him!? A stalker? How did a psycho druggie find out about him? His heart beat fast as a million things raced through his mind. Should he close? Call the cops? Quit? Change his name? Move away far from here?

The door swung open, "You know what I forgot to tell you?" The bell ring wildly.

Edgar yelped and jumped at the sudden question. She walked in, munching on alternating bites of cookies and chips as she made her way to the counter again. "My name! Can you believe it? How would you have summoned me?" She laughed.

"Y-your....?" Edgar began to calm down some. She didn't seem like a threat, really. Maybe some oddball girl who went to his school he never noticed before. "How did you get my name?"

"Hm? Well... it wasn't hard to get it. It's all over you. A cry for validation." She said.

"Validation?" Edgar echoed in confusion. "What are you?"

It was the girl's turn to frown. "Whaaat? Are you serious?"

"Um, yeah, that's why I'm asking." Edgar said, annoyed but still cautious. "It'd be kinda crappy if I had a stalker."

"I'm no stalker. I'm a demon!" The girl stomped her foot. "And you didn't know!? What kind of weirdo makes a deal with people like that?"

"The kind who tries to get safely rid of potential murderers." Edgar defended himself. "You know you looked crazy, right?"

The girl didn't know what to say right away, she made an odd face. "Okay, well... no I didn't. Anyway!" She exclaimed. "Even if you are the weird one here, you still get two favors. When you want to cash in, just call my name."

Edgar looked skeptical. "And what is your name?"

She grinned now. "Colette!"

"So.. just say that?" He asked, "And you'll appear?"

"Yup! Those are the rules. Make sure you don't call me for anything boring. This is my first deal, you know!"

"Okay. 'Demon girl.' I'll keep that in mind." Edgar said.

"... I'm starting to get the feeling that you don't believe me, am I right?" She asked suspiciously.

"Wow, what was your first clue?" Edgar asked flatly. "You have to admit. It's hard to believe with the way you've been acting. Aren't demons supposed to be cool?"

Colette smiled. "Cool, huh? You think so? Alright..." She put her bag down on the ground, then slammed her hands on the counter. "I'll show you cool."

She stared straight into Edgar's eyes, a mischievous grin playing at her lips now. A red hue began to crawl across her face, starting from the edges. Her toothy grin sharpened.

Edgar blinked. 'Either I'm having a really vivid dream or I'm about to die right now."

The color of her eyes seeped to yellow with red pupils. Horns emerged from her head, and a tail emerged into a view. Lastly, the book she held sprouted wings and flapped next to her, a green eye staring down the night worker.

"There!" She said, leaning heavily against the counter now. Her tail flicked. "Demon enough for you?"

So demons were real and he had just insulted one that could probably kill him on the spot. "Ah, fuck." Edgar said. "Did I trade my soul away for two favors?"

Colette giggled. "No, it was for the snacks! Remember?" She held a finger up to her mouth. "Although, maybe we can talk about your soul later since you just agree to deals like it's nothing!"

"That's because I saw you as a nutjob, remember?" Edgar snarked.

Colette shrugged. "Anyway, I've got to go. This was supposed to be a quick visit, and I've already spent longer here than I planned." She scooped up the bag, and held her arm out. Her little devilish book landed in the crook of her arm. "See you when you decide you need me, Edgar~" she smiled.

A cloud of smoke puffed everywhere, and she was gone. Edgar felt... dazed about the whole ordeal. Apparently Demons were real. What about Angels?

Edgar looked up and over to the camera in the back right corner of the store. The black camera was always recording.

"Oh...Do demons have to stay secret to humans?..." he muttered to himself. That could be a problem later, but he shrugged. He wasn't gonna call her to probably waste one of his two favors already. He just wanted his shift to be over.

[neo-culture-taste]

Subscribe! - I Want a Baby Now

Pairing: Kun x Reader (fem)

Genre: AU, romance, comedy, fluff

Word count: 2403

Summary: A YouTube inspired drabble series where you and your boyfriend upload videos catering to the couple tag.

For other members, see masterlist.

The video began with you standing very close to the camera as you adjusted it into position. Once it was sitting how you wanted it to be, you took a few steps back to check how it appeared from afar, and revealed the rest of your apartment's living room with the camera in perfect view of your couch. You smiled to yourself and clapped your hands at your handiwork. 

"Perfect!" The clip changed to you standing close to the camera again, this time so you could speak directly to your audience. "Hi and hello, everyone! Welcome back to my channel! Today I have a little treat planned for all of you. Since you keep requesting over and over for me to make another video with my boyfriend," you said. Screenshots of some of the comments you received from your viewers appeared on the screen around you, "I'm finally giving in. But why not make it fun, right? So as you can see, today," you clasped your hands together and shook them in front of you as you spoke," I'm going to prank Kun into thinking that I want to have a baby right now. I hid my camera inside my bag on this little table thing I have," you said and the accompanying picture displayed on the screen. "So it just looks like I tossed my bag here after coming home from vlogging. Totally inconspicuous." You laughed to yourself a bit maniacally, a little devil emoji appearing next to your head. "Kun's on his way over with some food and when he gets here I'm going to purposely put on a show with babies in it so it won't be random when I bring it up." You stepped away from the camera again and held your arms out wide. "Now let the show begin!"

The clip changed to your boyfriend walking in with the bag of food and then greeting you with a kiss before he set the bag down onto your coffee table. He took the seat next to you, playfully pushing you over with his butt so he could fit next to you and the arm rest. Why he couldn't just sit on the other side, you didn't know. As he took out the food and handed you your order, he asked you what you were watching. Trying to suppress the grin that was threatening to form on your face, you told him the name of the show and then began eating your food.

The video cut to a couple minutes later. You had finished eating your food fairly quickly and Kun had only a few bites left to his. Now was a good time to change the direction of your conversation. " Aw,  it must be so fun to have a house full of kids like that." You shifted in your seat and turned to face him, doing a little bounce on the cushion to add some enthusiasm to your facade. “Hey, babe?"

"Hm?" he answered you with a mouth full of food.

"How many kids do you want to have?"

He turned away from the TV to face you and smiled as he finished chewing. "This show giving you baby fever?"

You smiled back at him, but yours was underlined with mischief. "Maaaaybe," you said and a laughing emoji popped onto the screen. 

"How many kids do you want?" he asked you instead. 

"I asked you first."

Kun chuckled. "Maybe about three or four. I like the idea of having a big family."

You looked genuinely surprised. "Yes! Me, too," you said happily wrapping yourself around his arm. "It's going to be so great. Just think of all the cute family photos."

"And the college tuition."

You rolled your eyes at him, but then pressed your chest more onto his arm. "Let's start now."

"Eh?" He looked at you a bit confused. 

"Let's start our family now," you said and rubbed your hand across his chest. "Put a baby in me, Kun." You couldn't help but smile after that and three crying laughing emojis appeared on the screen. It sounded so raunchy but you needed to say it for the effect it had on your boyfriend--who of which was looking at you like you had just grown a second head. 

"Woah, there. What's gotten into you?" His brain obviously went to the direction that you were on some new bedroom kink. And although it was sudden, he wasn't opposed to playing along. 

"I want to have a baby." You let go of his arm and swung your leg over him so you could straddle his lap. His hands automatically went to hold your thighs and yours held onto his shoulders. "Will you help me?" you asked then leaned in to kiss him. 

Not fully distracted by your sex appeal, Kun was still in a rational head space. "We don't even live together yet."

"Doesn't matter." You kissed him again, it was still short but more heated than the first. 

"And we're not married," he added when you pulled back a bit. 

"Doesn't matter," you repeated. Instead of kissing his lips again, you decided to go for the weak spot on his ear. 

Kun's hands slid up and around your thighs to lay purchase on your ass. "And we're still in school. We're not financially or mentally ready."

You knew this wasn't going to be easy. You rolled your eyes again and let out a sigh as you moved away from his ear, pretending to be annoyed. "It takes months for a baby to arrive. I can move in with you and save all the money I would be paying on rent here. And we don't have to get married right away or even have a wedding."

The camera zoomed in on your boyfriend's face as it twisted into a look of absolute disbelief. "We don't have to have a wed--you have like five Pinterest boards dedicated to your future wedding!" Oh shit, you forgot about that. "And normally the baby comes after the wedding."

"Who cares if we do things a little out of order. I want to start my family with you now." You leaned to kiss him again but he dodged you at the last second by turning his head away. "Whaaat?  Come ooon," you whined and moved your hips a little bit against his. "Come in." You threw your head back in laughter at your dirty joke, but Kun didn't find it very funny at the moment.

He gripped the sides of your hip and pushed you a little further back on his lap. "This is something we seriously need to sit down and talk about."

"We can talk about it after you put the baby in me. Now, come on!" You went to undo his belt but he stopped you at lightning speed, accompanied by the sound of a whip cracking. Right afterwards the video played an instant replay of what he did in slow motion.

"Y/N stop. You might think we can handle a baby right now, but this decision isn't just yours. It's mine too and I don't want to have a baby right now."

"But baaabe--"

"No, now get off me. We can talk about this seriously if you want to but it's not going to happen until much later from now." He grabbed your wrists as your hands tried to make their way to his chest again. "And I can't talk to you properly about it like this!"

"Because your body is telling you to go and make a baby!"

"No! It's just reacting to what you're doing right now! We can go and practice but we're not going all the way until we plan this out for real."

Okay. It was time to try a different tactic. You thought that maybe tugging on his heartstrings a little bit would be able to convince him, so you put on a frown and pretended to get upset. "We don't need to practice or plan because I'm completely serious right now. I've been thinking about this for a while and I can't wait anymore. I want to start a family with you. Do you not want to have one with me?"

Kun's eyes widened in panic. "No, no, no! It's not that!" He pulled you back closer to him then wrapped his arms around your waist. "I do. But just not right now, babe. There's so much we need to accomplish before we have a baby. If we do it now then it's going to be hard trying to juggle taking care of a baby and doing everything else."

"It won't be hard cuz we'll be together and our families will be around to help us." You gasped in excitement. "Just think how excited your mom will be." Kun was quiet as he thought it over,  searching your eyes for any hint of reluctance. You knew talking about his mom would get to him. "Everyone will be so happy and we'll be the happiest." He remained silent. "You'd be an amazing father," you said softly and ran your fingers through his hair "Come on. Have a baby with me."

Your boyfriend sat there in silence for a little bit longer, his hands caressing your back as he thought through all his options. "But..," he finally said, "you're still on birth control. So it's not going to happen now even if we tried."

You smiled at him, thinking to yourself that you'd won. "I didn't take my pill today," you said and put your forehead against his. "And if it doesn't happen now then we will just have to keep trying until it works." You closed the distance between your lips and captured him in another kiss. 

He reciprocated without any hesitation, but once you broke away he had something else to say. "I want to. I really do. But I really don't think this is a good idea for right now." Dammit, Kun! 

It was time for Plan C. You pulled back away from him and scowled. "If you don't want to have a baby with me right now, then I'll go find someone else to do it," you said and got off his lap to stand up.

"WHAT?!" Kun shot up from his seat to stand next to you. "Who the hell are you going to go to?!"

You turned away from him so he would see you smiling. "I don't know. It doesn't matter. I'll take the first guy that wants to have a baby right now since you're so adamant about not having one."

"NOT HAVING ONE RIGHT NOW. NOT RIGHT NOW." Oh gosh, you wanted to laugh so badly. 

You fixed your face into looking angry again and turned back to him. "It's now or never, Kun! I really really want this!"

"You want this bad enough that you'd leave me?" He sounded a bit hurt. You were starting to feel a little bad now.

"I didn't say I was leaving you, just that I would get someone else to put a baby in me."

"THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE." Lmao, it didn't.

"Yes, it does. So if you want to be the one to do this with me, then let's go!" You pointed in the direction of your bedroom and stomped your foot.

"Fine! If you want one that badly, then come here." He grabbed you by your shirt to pull you towards him then he kissed you roughly. You giggled against him and tried to pull away, but he wasn't letting up. He curled his fingers underneath the hem of your shirt and was about to put it up, but you managed to break away from him and took a step back.

"Wait!" you yelled through your laughter.

"You just said you didn't want to wait and now I can't wait," he said and reached out his hand to pull you back. But you ran away from him and went closer towards the camera. You reached inside the bag it was in, trying to uncover it, but Kun came up behind you and captured you by the waist, pressing his body against your backside as he planted kisses along the side of your neck. 

"It's a prank!" you yelled. "This was a prank! Babe, look!"

Kun stopped his actions and looked up to see the camera out of your bag and the red light that indicated that it was currently filming. His face went slack and he slowly let go of you. You could tell he was absolutely ticked off, because he then closed his eyes and turned around while taking a deep breath. You stood beside him and continued to laugh at his expense, laughing harder when he shook his head and peered up at the ceiling in an attempt to calm himself down.

"I knew you were acting weird," he said and ran his tongue across his teeth.

"I'm sorry, baby. They really wanted to see you again." You tried to hug him but he rejected and push you away.

"You are not uploading this."

"I have to!" You went to hug him again and laughed when you got the same reaction as before. "I put so much work into it. Don't you think I was a good actor?" He answered you by looking at your face angrily, but he failed and looked away from you again as soon as his smile began to spread. He wasn't that mad at you. It probably would make an entertaining video. He was just super embarrassed that he fell for it. 

"Come find me when you're done playing tricks," he told you and walked away and out of the frame. 

"Aw, Kun! Come back!" He said something the camera's microphone didn't fully pick up, but it made you laugh before you decided to focus it on you. "Well, I hope you all liked this video. I have to go cheer up Kun and make it up to him. Follow me on all my accounts listed below, like this video, and click the subscribe button if you want to see more videos with my boyfriend. But maybe I should hold off on tricking him for a little bit, huh?" You switched the camera from holding it in one of your hands to the other. "Thanks so much for watching! And I'll see you later! Tootles!"

- D

[space--cadet-glow]

Translation: German manga of “The Minish Cap”, Part 1: “Link and Vaati”

So, after long last, I have translated all seven chapters of the German version of the manga version of “The Minish Cap” in the entirety. Because I could. I also have the Japanese and Italian copies of “The Minish Cap” and the German version of “Four Swords” that I’ll also do eventually. Also, I’m tempted to do some translation theories, too (in the same vein as the “Forest vs. Town” argument analysis)... But, for now: here is the completed first chapter! I’ll try to remember to post one chapter a day.

My translation key: DT: „direct translation" (translated word for word) EQ: "English equivalent" (as in, as close to an English-sounding sentence as it's gonna get) DT/EQ: „"direct translation/English equivalent" (for when the DT is so similar to an EQ that it's practically English already) OE: "official English (translation as given in the English version of "The Minish Cap")" (NOTE:) "anything I need to point out" (exactly what it says on the tin) BG: „backwards German" for the Minish language in forwards form BOE: "the forwards version of the Minish language in the OE version" BOET: "the TRANSLATION of the forwards version of the Minish language in the OE version"

My translation work under the cut.

1. KAPITEL: „LINK UND VAATI" 1ST CHAPTER: "LINK AND VAATI" CHAPTER 1: "LINK AND VAATI"

Erzähler: „Kennt ihr die Minish?" DT: „Know you all the Minish?" EQ: "Do you all know the Minish?" OE: "Do you know about the Picori?" (NOTE: The book never specifies who's narrating, so I'm bringing back my default Storyteller.)

Erzähler: „Die Minish sind daumengroße Lebewesen, die überall leben." DT: „The Minish are thumb-sized creatures, that everywhere live." EQ: "The Minish are thumb-sized creatures that live everywhere." OE: "They're teeny, tiny creatures the size of your thumb that live everywhere in our world."

Erzähler: „Die Menschen wissen nichts davon..." DT: „The humans know not thereof..." EQ: "The humans don't know it..." OE: "Normal folks rarely see them..."

Erzähler: „...aber sie helfen uns immer wieder, ohne dass wir es wahrnehmen können." DT: „...but they help us always again, without that we it perceive able." EQ: "...but they help us again and again, without us being able to perceive it." OE: "...But when we're not looking, they help us out." (NOTE: Extremely idiomatic. Another translation could be "without us being able to be aware of it".)

Erzähler: „Denn die Minish..." DT/EQ: „"Because the Minish..." OE: "That's because..."

Erzähler: „...lieben uns Menschen." DT/EQ: „"...love us humans." OE: "...the Picori love people!"

Link: „Und hopp!" DT: „And hopp!" EQ: "One, two!"/"Alley-oop!" OE: "Hup... Two..." (NOTE: Both translations work and make an equal amount of sense.)

Toneffekte: „KLONG KLING" DT/EQ: „"KLONG KLING" OE: "KLANG KLANG" (NOTE: This is what I'm calling the "Sound Effects".)

Alberich: „Schönes Schwert. Sicher haben die Minish uns dabei geholfen." DT: „Beautiful sword. Certainly (x) the Minish us with helped." EQ: "Beautiful sword. The Minish certainly helped us with it." OE: "Oh my... That's a GOOD sword. The Picori must've pitched in on this one!" (NOTE: Alberich is still Smith. And conversational past.)

Link: „Opa, gibt es die Minish wirklich?" DT: „Grandpa, is there the Minish real?" EQ: "Grandpa, are the Minish real?" OE: "Grandfather, do the Picori really exist?" (NOTE: Yay, my least-favourite idiom.)

Alberich: „Na, aber sicher doch. Es heißt, nur Kinder können die Minish sehen." DT: „Well, but certainly still. It (is) said, only children can the Minish see." EQ: "Well, sure enough/for sure. It is said that only children can see the Minish." OE: "They say only children can see Picori. If you truly believe, you may see them yourself." (NOTE: ...Idioms. Bah.)

Link: „Wirklich...? Ich habe sie noch nie gesehen..." DT: „Really...? I (x) them still never seen..." EQ: "Really...? I've still never seen them..." OE: "Really?! I've NEVER seen anything like that!"

Link: „Oh, ich muss jetzt trainieren! Bis später!!" DT: „Oh, I must now train! Until later!!" EQ: "Oh, I must train now! See you later!!" OE: "Yipes! See ya later, Grandfather!" (NOTE: Take a drink for every time "Yipes" is used in the English translation. You'll be dead by the time Chilta shows up.)

Alberich: „Gib acht, Link!" DT: „Give attention, Link!" EQ: "Be careful, Link!" OE: "Have fun, Link!" (NOTE: I think the idioms are killing me more quickly than the game did.)

SIGN ON DOOR: „Magnus-Dojo" DT/EQ: „"Magnus-Dojo" OE: "Swiftblade's Dojo" (NOTE: What English calls Swiftblade, that is.)

(The German Translation then adds in an explanation for what a Dojo is). [ADDENDUM: „Trainingshalle für Kampfsportarten." DT/EQ: „"Training-hall for martial-arts."]

Link: „Hyaah!! Yaah!! Haaah!!" DT/EQ: „"Hyaah!! Yaah!! Haaah!!" OE: "Dah! Hyah! Taaah!" (NOTE: Link stayed Link. Naturally.)

Toneffekte: „Bamm Klatsch Huah!" DT/EQ: „"Bam Clash Huah!" OE: "Whack Whack Yah!"

Magnus: „Genug, Jungs! Das Training ist für heute beendet!" DT: „Enough, boys! The training is for to-day finished!" EQ: "Enough, boys! The training is finished for to-day!" OE: "All right! That's enough for today! Hmph!"

Magnus: „Morgen ist das Minish-Fest mit dem Kampfturnier!" DT/EQ: „"To-morrow is the Minish-Festival with the Martial Arts/Fighting-Tournament!" OE: "It's time for the annual Martial Arts Tournament at the Picori Festival." (NOTE: I'll just go with "martial arts" for now, since that's what the original Japanese used. This must be the reason how Vaati got in without a sword.)

Magnus: „Wer daran teilnimmt, kämpft im Namen unseres Dojos! Viel Erfolg!" DT: „Who there of partake, fights in (the) name (of) our Dojo! Much success!" EQ: "Whoever partakes in it fights in the name of our Dojo! I wish your success!" OE: "Participants, your behavior must bring honor to the Swiftblade Dojo." (NOTE: ...But... The English door said "Swiftblade's Dojo"... Which is it?)

Toneffekte: „Glänz" DT/EQ: „"Gleam" OE: "Shine"

Toneffekte: „Japs Japs" DT/EQ: „"Gasp gasp" OE: "Huff puff"

Link: „Jawohl!!" DT: „Yes indeed!!" EQ: "Yessir!!" OE: "Yes, Sensei!" (NOTE: Can also simply mean "Yes!!" in a very emphatic manner... But since Link is saying this to Swiftblade, I thought the "sir" part made more sense...)

Magnus: „Hm? Link, du schaust nur zu." DT: „Hm? Link, you watch only (x)." EQ: "Hm? Link, you're only watching." OE: "Hmm? You will only be observing, Link." (NOTE: "zuschauen"...)

Link: „Waas?! Ich bin aber angemeldet..." DT: „Whaat?! I (x) but registered..." EQ: "Whaat?! I already registered..." OE: "Huuh?! B-But I registered to compete!"

Link: „Bitte, Meister! Ich möchte wissen, wie gut ich bin!" DT/EQ: „"Please, Master! I would like (to) know, how good I am!" OE: "Please, Sensei! I want to test my skills!" (NOTE: There's only one reason I can think of for why German Link calls him "Meister" and not "Sensei"... And that's probably to draw a parallel towards German Vaati, who ALSO calls his teacher, Ezlo, "Meister" in specific.)

Magnus: „Viel zu früh für dich! Der Weg der Schwertkunst ist lang! Noch bist du nicht reif genug!" DT: „Much too early for you! The way (to) the sword-arts is long! Still are you not ready enough!" EQ: "Much too early for you! The way to swordsmanship is long! You are still not ready enough!" OE: "Hmph! I said no! The way of the sword is precise and disciplined! You are not yet ready! Hmph!" (NOTE: EINS, ZWEI, DREI, MARIONETTE NUN SEI.)

Toneffekte: „Glänz" DT/EQ: „"Gleam" OE: "Shine"

Link: „Menno. Menno. Menno." DT/EQ: „"Man. Man. Man." OE: "Hmph! Tsk! Rats!" (NOTE: „Menno" is sort of an... Interjection for annoyance/indignation. Seen as rather childish. Another way to translate it would be something like "Shoot. Shoot. Shoot.")

Link: „Und dafür habe ich acht Stunden am Tag geübt! Es gibt doch nur ein Turnier im Jahr..." DT: „And for that (x) I eight hours of (the) day practised! There is still only a Tournament (of) the year..." EQ: "And I practised for eight hours a day for that! There's only one Tournament a year..." OE: "I practiced hours and hours every day for this! The Tournament's just once a year!"

Toneffekte: „Murmel Grummel" DT/EQ: „"Mumble grumble" OE: "Mutter grumble"

Link: „Yaaaah!! Wirbelattacke!!" DT/EQ: „"Yaaah!! Swirl-attack!!" OE: "Swiftblade School Spin Attack!!" (NOTE: English version, please... Is it "Swiftblade's Dojo", "Swiftblade Dojo", or "Swiftblade School"??? Make up your mind...)

Vaati: "Hi hi." DT/EQ: „"Hee hee." OE: "Heh!" (NOTE: Likewise, Vaati stayed Vaati. That is, from the Japanese version's Gufuu...)

Vaati: „Ha ha ha ha" DT/EQ: „"Ha ha ha ha" OE: "Heh heh heh heh"

Link: „He, du! Was lachst du?!" DT: „Hey, you! What laughing you?!" EQ: "Hey, you! What are you laughing at?!" OE: "Hey, you! Are you laughing at me?!"

Vaati: „Ach... Deine kindische Technik war witzig..." DT/EQ: „"Oh... Your childish Technique was humorous..." OE: "I had to... ...It was such a pathetic display."

Link: „WAAAS?!" DT/EQ: „"WHAAAT?!" OE: "WHAT?!"

Vaati: „Tja... Ich zeige dir, wie man richtig Bäume fällt..." DT: „Oh, well... I show (to) you, how one correctly trees cut down..." EQ: "Oh, well... I'll show you how one correctly cuts down trees..." OE: "Now, now. Want to see the REAL way to defeat a tree?"

Toneffekte: „Baazzack!!" DT/EQ: „"Baazzack!!" OE: KRAK KRAK KRAK KRAK" (NOTE: NO CLUE.)

Vaati: „He he he he..." DT/EQ: „"He he he he..." OE: "Heh heh heh heh"

Link: „Was... Was war das?!" DT/EQ: „"What... What was that?!" OE: "Who... Who is that guy?"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Hallo, Link!" DT/EQ: „"Hello, Link!" OE: "Link!" (NOTE: Name's the same.)

Prinzessin Zelda: „Link!" DT/EQ: „"Link!" OE: "Link!"

Link: „Prinzessin Zelda!" DT/EQ: „"Princess Zelda!" OE: "Princess Zelda!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Was ist denn hier passiert?" DT: „What (x) then here happened?" EQ: "What happened here?" OE: "What happened here?" (NOTE: FINALLY. A MATCHING LINE OF DIALOGUE. THANK YOU, PRINCESS.)

Link: „Ach, nichts! Bist du mal wieder allein vom Schloss hierher gelaufen? Der Minister macht bestimmt wieder ein großes Theater." DT: „Oh, nothing! (x) You (softner) again alone from (the) Castle here run? The Minister makes certainly again a great fuss." EQ: "Oh, nothing! Did you run here from the Castle alone again? The Minister will certainly make a great fuss again." OE: "Nothing... Never mind. Did you sneak out of the Castle again? The Minister's gonna be mad!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Nun, heute ist doch das Minish-Fest. Lass uns zusammen dort hingehen!" DT: „Well, to-day is still the Minish-Festival. Let us together there go!" EQ: "Well, to-day is the Minish-Festival. Let's go there together!" OE: "But the annual Picori Festival is today. C'mon, let's go see it together!!" (NOTE: I love how Zelda just casually dodges the question.)

Link: „Nö." DT/EQ: „"Nope." OE: "I'm not going." (NOTE: ...Bröther. The lämp...)

Toneffekte: „Fosch" DT/EQ: „"Fosch" OE: "Fwp" (NOTE: Okay, no clue.)

Prinzessin Zelda: „Warum nichts?" DT/EQ: „"Why not?" OE: "Why not?"

Link: „Ich muss trainieren! Geh du allein hin!" DT: „I must train! Go you alone there!" EQ: "I must train! Go there alone!" OE: "I'm too busy training! If you wanna go, go alone!"

Toneffekte: „Heul..." DT/EQ: „"Cry..." OE: "Plip"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Du bist so gemein! Ich habe mich so drauf gefreut, mit dir auf das Fest zu gehen..." DT: „You are so mean! I (x) myself so (x) pleased, with you to the Festival to go..." EQ: "You're so mean! I was so looking forward to going to the Festival with you..." OE: "Why are you being so mean? I s-snuck out so w-we could g-go together!" (NOTE: Idiomatic...)

Toneffekte: „Flenn flenn" DT/EQ: „"Blub blub" OE: "Sniff sob wail"

Link: „Ooooch, das war doch nur ein Witz! Ich hab mich auch darauf gefreut!" DT: „Oooohh, that was still only a joke! I (x) myself also there pleased!" EQ: "Oooohh, it was only a joke! I was looking forward to it, too!" OE: "R-Right... I was just kidding! I've been looking for you!" (NOTE: *intense sobbing*)

Link: „Wein doch nicht, Zelda. Komm, wir gehen los!!" DT: „Cry still not, Zelda. Come, we go let's!!" EQ: "Don't cry, Zelda. Come, let's go!!" OE: "Please don't cry! We've got too much to see!"

Toneffekte: „Freu" DT/EQ: „"Pleased" OE: "Perk"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Ja. ♪" DT/EQ: „"Yes. ♪" OE: "Yaay! ♪"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Schnell! Es fängt schon an!" DT/EQ: „"Quick! It began already (x)!" OE: "Come on! It's already starting!"

Toneffekte: „Bumm bumm bumm" DT/EQ: „"Boom boom boom" OE: "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

Link: „..." DT/EQ: „"..." OE: "..." (NOTE: Finally, a game-accurate line of dialogue.)

Link: „Das war ja schon immer so... Ich kann nie »Nein« zu ihr sagen..." DT: „That was indeed already always so... I can never »No« to her say..." EQ: "It's always been this way... I can never say »No« to her..." OE: "It's been like this ever since we were little... I can't say no to her." (NOTE: Yes, the French-style quotation marks are used.)

Toneffekte: „DING DONG" DT/EQ: „"DING DONG" OE: "KLANG KLANG"

Leute: „Oh, Prinzessin Zelda! Link, du bist ja echt gut mit ihr befreundhet." DT: „Oh, Princess Zelda! Link, you are indeed really good with her friendly." EQ: "Oh, Princess Zelda! Link, you really are friendly with her." OE: "Look, it's Princess Zelda! You two sure are close, aren't you, Link?"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Oh, hi hi. ♥" DT/EQ: „"Oh, hi hi. ♥" OE: "Tee-hee!"

Link: „Sei ruhig! Komm, Zelda!!" DT/EQ: „"Be quiet! Come, Zelda!!" OE: "Shut up!! Let's go! C'mon!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Warte, Link! Da gibt es eine Lotterie!" DT: „Wait, Link! There there is a lottery!" EQ: "Wait, Link! There's a lottery over there!" OE: "Wait, Link. There's a lottery!"

Link: „Ach, da gewinnt man eh nie! Höchstens nur einen Trostpreis..." DT: „Oh, there win one anyway never! Mostly only a consolation-prize..." EQ: "Oh, no-one ever wins those! At most, just a consolation-prize..." OE: "Why bother No one ever wins... Not the good prizes, just the cheesy little ones!"

Toneffekte: „Kling klong" DT/EQ: „"Kling klong" OE: "RING RING"

Bruna: „Hauptgewinn!!" DT/EQ: „"Jackpot!!" OE: "We have a big winner!" (NOTE: Bruna is still Pina. You'll see why I keep saying "still" much, much later...)

Bruna: „Hauptgewinn an die Prinzessin! Ihr habt freie Auswahl!" DT/EQ: „Jackpot for the Princess! You have free choice!" OE: "First prize right at the start! Choose anything you like!"

Toneffekte: „KLONG KLONG" DT/EQ: „"KLONG KLONG" OE: "RING RING"

Person 2: „Wahnsinn!" DT/EQ: „"Madness!" OE: "Wow, Princess!"

Person 3: „Prinzessin, nehmt den herzförmigen Stein! Er steht Euch gut!" DT/EQ: „"Princess, take the heart-shaped stone! It suits you well!" OE: "Get the heart-shaped stone, Princess! It's cute! It'd look GREAT on you!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Ich nehme diesen Schild." DT: „I take this shield." EQ: "I'll take this shield." OE: "I'll take this shield."

Link: „Wieso?! Du darfst dir alles aussuchen. Der Stein ist doch hübsch..." DT: „How-so?! You may (for) you anything choose. The stone is still pretty..." EQ: "Why?! You can choose anything. The stone is so pretty..." OE: "Huh? You got FIRST prize. You should chose something better." (NOTE: And no, that's not a typo. English really says "chose" and not "choose".)

Prinzessin Zelda: „Nein, ich möchte den hier." DT: „No, I would like the here." EQ: "No, I would like this here." OE: "No, THIS is what I want."

Bruna: „Wirklich? Ihr seid aber seltsam..." DT: „Really? You are but strange..." EQ: "Really? You're rather strange..." OE: "I see the Princess has... Umm... Interesting taste!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Hier, Link. Schade, dass du diesmal nicht am Turnier teilnehmen konntest. Aber ich weiß, wie gut du bist. Und damit wirst du noch besser!" DT: „Here, Link. Sad, that you this-time not in (the) Tournament partake could. But I know, how good you are. And therewith will you still better!" EQ: "Here, Link. It's a shame that you couldn't partake in the Tournament this time. But, I know how good you are. And with this, you'll get even better!" OE: "Here. I'm sorry you can't participate in the Martial Arts contest. You'd've done great. But use this while you're training for next year." (NOTE: Slightly idiomatic.)

Link: „Oh... Das wusstest du...?" DT: „Oh... That knew you...?" EQ: "Oh... You knew that...?" OE: "Huh? She knew?!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Klasse! Du siehst toll damit aus!" DT/EQ: „"Classy! You look terrific with that out!" OE: "It's perfect! You look SO cool!" (NOTE: That's STILL what she said.)

Link: „He he... Danke." DT/EQ: „"He he... Thanks." OE: "Heh heh... Don't embarrass me!"

Toneffekte: „Bumm bumm bumm" DT/EQ: „"Boom boom boom" OE: "BOOM POOMF BAM"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Das Turnier beginnt. Lass uns zum Schloss gehen!" DT: „The Tournament begins. Let us to (the) Castle go!" EQ: "The Tournament's beginning. Let's go to the Castle!" OE: "Let's go to the Castle. The Marial Arts contest is about to start!" (NOTE: DARNIT, ENGLISH. Is it "Tournament" or "contest"?! MAKE UP YOUR MIND!)

Link: "Ja, los!" DT/EQ: „"Yes, let's!" OE: "Where to next?" (NOTE: But... English... This speech-bubble is AFTER Zelda's... She's already told you... Where you're going...)

Prinzessin Zelda: „Link, kennst du die Vorgeschichte vom Minish-Fest?" DT: „Link, know you the history of the Minish-Festival?" EQ: "Link, do you know the history of the Minish-Festival?" OE: "Do you know the story behind the Picori Festival?"

???: „Waah! Waah! Waah!" DT/EQ: „"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" OE: "HURRAAY ROARR YAAY" (NOTE: The people... Cheering, I guess?)

Person 4: „Gewonnen!!" DT/EQ: „"Won/Win!!" OE: "Look! He won!" (NOTE: Means both; and both make sense. The announcement of who won the match, but all I'm hearing is Yzma as a kitten...)

Link: „Klar! Die Minish-Legende... Opa hat sie mir erzählt." DT: „Clearly! The Minish-Legend... Grandpa (x) it to me told." EQ: "Clearly! The Minish-Legend... Grandpa told it to me." OE: "Yeah. The Picori Legend. My Grandfather told it to me."

Link: „Vor langer Zeit, als schreckliche Monster unsere Welt bedrohten... ...und die Städte vernichteten... ...stiegen Minish vom Himmel herab und gaben einem Helden das Schwert." DT: „Before long time, as terrible monsters our world threatened... and the cities destroyed... ascended Minish from the Heavens/sky down and gave a Hero the Sword." EQ: "A long time ago, as terrible monsters threatened our world... and destroyed the cities... the Minish descended from the Heavens/sky and gave a Hero the Sword." OE: "Long, long ago, terrible evil spirits appeared in the world. They burnt our city to the ground. At the same time, the Picori arrived, bestowing a magical Sword to a Great Hero."

Link: „Und dieser Held vertrieb die Monster mit dem Schwert." DT/EQ: „"And this Hero ejected the monsters with the Sword." OE: "Using the Sword, the Hero drove the evil spirits away... or something."

Prinzessin Zelda: „Genau, Link. Seitdem feiern wir jährlich ein Fest... ...als Dankeschön an die Minish." DT: „Exactly, Link. Since-then celebrate we yearly a Festival... as thank-you to the Minish." EQ: "Exactly, Link. Since then, we celebrate a Festival yearly... as a thank-you to the Minish." OE: "Yes, that's it. So every year we have a Festival... ...To thank the Picori for coming at our time of need."

Link: "Das ist doch nur eine Legende..." DT/EQ: „"That is still only a legend..." OE: "You really believe the legend?"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Oh, du glaubst nicht daran? Die Minish gibt es wirklich. Vater behauptet das auch immer. Sie öffnen ein Mal in hundert Jahren das Tor zu unserer Welt und kommon zu uns." DT: „Oh, you believe not that in? The Minish are (x) real. Father claims that also always. They open one time in hundred years the Gate to our world and come to us." EQ: "Oh, you still don't believe that? The Minish are real. Father always claims that, too. Every hundred years, they open the Gate to our world and come to us." OE: "You mean you DON'T? My father told me the Picori really DO exist. He said they come out when the Door to the Picori World opens once every hundred years."

Prinzessin Zelda: „Und dieses Jahr ist es wieder so weit!" DT: „And this year is it again so far!" EQ: "And this year, it's happening again!" OE: "And this is the one-hundredth year!" (NOTE: Could also be, "And this year, the time has come again!")

ANNOUNCER: „Nr. 28, Vaati! Nr. 57, Max!!" DT: „Nr. 28, Vaati! Nr. 57, Max!!" EQ: "No. 28, Vaati! Nr. 57, Max!!" OE: "Next up, the mysterious Vaati... ...Versus big bad Max!" (NOTE: Max kept his name as well... And because I'm insane, I can tell you that in goroawase, "57" is "Kon'nan"/Like this" and "28" means "Fiibaa"/"Fever"... What signifigance this holds, I don't know. Also, why English removed the numbers... Ich hab' keine Ahnung.)

???: „Wah! Wah! Wah!" DT/EQ: „"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!" OE: "YAAY CHEER ROAR" (NOTE: I give up. The crowd is Robert Plant.)

Link: "! Oh, er?!" DT/EQ: „"! Oh, him?!" OE: "! It's him!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Du kennst ihn?" DT/EQ: „"You know him?" OE: "You know that guy?"

Max: „En Garde!!" DT/EQ: „"En Garde!!" OE: "There's the bell!" (NOTE: English Max... Isn't the one talking???)

Toneffekte: „KAWOMM!" DT/EQ: „"KABOOM!" OE: ZWARRKK"

Max: „Bäh!" DT/EQ: „"BAH!" OE: "GAH!" (NOTE: ...Humbug.)

Link: „!!" DT/EQ: „"!!" OE: "!"

Erzähler: „Der junge Mann in der lila Robe hat seine überwältigende Stärke gezeigt. Deshalb war er der eindeutige Sieger." DT: „The young man in the purple robes (x) his overwhelming strength shown. Therefore was he the definite victor." EQ: "The young man in the purple robes showed his overwhelming strength. Therefore, he was the definite victor." OE: "The man in the purple robe showed overwhelming power... And quickly took the Championship."

???: „Wah! Wah!" DT/EQ: „"Whoa! Whoa!" OE: "YAAY HURRAY"

Alberich: „Wer mag das sein?" DT/EQ: „"Who might that be?" OE: "I wonder who that guy is."

Link: „Oh, Opa! Du auch hier?" DT: „Oh, Grandpa! You also here?" EQ: "Oh, Grandpa! You're also here?" OE: "Grandpa! When'd you get here?"

???: „Waah!" DT/EQ: „"Whoa!" OE: "YAAY"

Alberich: „Ich bin hier, um das Schwert für den Sieger zu bringen." DT: „I am here, in order the Sword for the victor to bring." EQ: "I am here in order to bring the Sword for the victor." OE: "I came to deliver the Sword that goes to the Champion."

Erzähler: „Opa Alberich ist der beste Schmied in Hyrule." DT/EQ: „"Grandpa Alberich is the best Blacksmith in Hyrule." OE: "Grandfather Smith is the best weaponsmith in Hyrule."

Alberich: „Das ist das Heilige Schwert der Minish." DT/EQ: „"That is the Holy Sword (of) the Minish." OE: "And to see the Sacred Sword handed down by the Picori."

Link: „Was? Ist das echt?" DT/EQ: „"What? Is that real/genuine?" OE: "What? The REAL thing?!"

Alberich: „Laut der Legende versiegelt es Hunderte von Monstern in dieser Truhe." DT: „According (to) the legends seals it hundreds of Monsters in this Chest." EQ: "According to the legends, it seals hundreds of Monsters in this Chest." OE: "According to legend, the evil spirits are in that Chest, trapped there by the Sword's power."

Minister Friedrich: „Nun beginnen wir mit der Siegerehrung." DT: „Now begin we with the Awards-Ceremony." EQ: "Now we begin with the Awards-Ceremony." OE: "Now let us begin the Award Ceremony." (NOTE: Minister Friedrich/Potho kept his name.)

Minister Friedrich: „Der Sieger Vaati möge hervortreten!" DT: „The victor Vaati may forth-step!" EQ: "The victor, Vaati, may step forth!" OE: "Champion Vaati, step forward!"

König Dartus: „Vaati, dein Sieg wird in die Geschichte des Minish-Festes eingehen. Nimm dieses Schwert." DT: „Vaati, your victory will in the history (of) the Minish-Festival down-go. Take this Sword." EQ: "Vaati, your victory will go down in the history of the Minish-Festival. Take this Sword." OE: "Vaati, please accept this fine Sword and know that your name will be inscribed... ...In the annals of our Festival!" (NOTE: König/King Dartus/Daltus. Same thing. Just wait until we get to a certain pair of Minish twins...)

Vaati: „Ich danke Euch..." DT/EQ: „"I thank you..." OE: "Thanks for the Sword, but..."

Vaati: „...dass das alles so gut klappt!" DT: „...that/because that all so well worked-out!" EQ: "...because everything worked out so well!" OE: "...What I REALLY want is in that Chest!"

Vaati: „Das Heilige Schwert der Minish und die versiegelte Kiste wurden zur Siegerehrung vorgeführt." DT: „The Holy Sword (of) the Minish and the sealed Chest were to (the) Award-Ceremony presented." EQ: "The Holy Sword of the Minish and the sealed Chest were only ever presented at the Award-Ceremony." OE: "And since the Sacred Sword of the Picori and the Bound Chest are only ever seen at this annual Awards Ceremony..."

Vaati: „Lange habe ich diesen Moment herbeigesehnt!" DT: „Long have I this moment yearned-for!" EQ: "I have long yearned for this moment!" OE: "...Winning your stupid Tournament was my only chance!" (NOTE: Or another equally-heartbreaking translation could be, "I have longed for this moment!")

Hofstaat: „Was?! Ein Schurke!!" DT/EQ: „"What?! A villain!!" OE: "What?! Don't cause any trouble, son!" (NOTE: Probably unintentional... But „Schurke" can also mean "knave"... Which is what one of the Fates in "Cadence of Hyrule" calls Octavo... Huh...)

Hofstaat: „Aaargl!!" DT/EQ: „"Aaarghh!!" OE: "AAARGH!"

Toneffekte: „ZABAMM! KARACK!" DT/EQ: „"KABAMM! KRRACK!" OE: "ZWARRKK KRAKK"

Link: „Das Schwert!" DT/EQ: „"The Sword!" OE: "The Sword!!"

Monster: „GRÄÄÄÄÄÄH!" DT/EQ: „"GROOOOOOWL!" OE: "HOOWWWL"

Person: "Iieeek! Lauft weg!!" DT/EQ: „"Eeeeek! Run away!!" OE: "Eeeek! Run!"

Alberich: „Link?!" DT/EQ: „"Link?!" OE: "Link?!"

Monster: „Urks!" DT/EQ: „"Ack!" OE: "Eek!"

Toneffekte: „BUZZZ!" DT/EQ: „"BUZZZ!" OE: "WHAAM"

Vaati: "!" DT/EQ: „"!" OE: "!"

Prinzessin Zelda: „Wer bist du?! Was sollte das werden?!" DT: „Who are you?! What should that be?!" EQ: "Who are you?! What was that supposed to be?!" OE: "Who ARE you? WHY have you done this?" (NOTE: Oh, look... Hello, idioms, my old friend...)

Vaati: „Oh oh... Das ist wohl die magische Kraft der Hyrule-Prinzessin...?" DT: „Oh oh... This is surely the magical power (of) the Hyrule-Princess...?" EQ: "Oh oh... This is surely the magical power of Hyrule's Princess...?" OE: "Well, well... Now we see the mysterious power of the Princess of Hyrule!"

Vaati: „Wenn ich dich jetzt verschone, wirst du mir später nur im Weg sein..." DT: „If I you now spare, will you (for) me later only in (the) way be..." EQ: "If I spare you now, you will only be in my way later..." OE: "If I don't take care of you now, you'll cause me no end of grief later!"

Link: „STOPP!!" DT/EQ: „"STOP!!" OE: "STOP!"

Toneffekte: „ZAMM!" DT/EQ: „"BAMM!" OE: "SLIIIDE"

Vaati: „Der Junge aus dem Wald... Willst du etwas den Helden spielen? Hi hi!" DT: „The boy from the Forest... Want you something the Hero play? Hi hi!" EQ: "The boy from the Forest... Do you want to play Hero? Hi hi!" OE: "Well, if it isn't that little boy I met in the forest. Are you pretending to be a knight? Heh heh"

Link: „Lass die Prinzessin in Ruhe!" DT: „Let the Princess in peace!" EQ: "Leave the Princess alone!" OE: "I won't let you touch Zelda!"

Toneffekte: „BUZZZ" DT/EQ: „"BUZZZ" OE: "KZARK" (NOTE: DENIED.)

Link: „AAAAH!!" DT/EQ: „"AAAH!!" OE: "AAARGH!!"

Toneffekte: „ZIIIPP" DT/EQ: „"ZIIIPP" OE: "SHING"

Vaati: „Seht her! Dies ist der Fluch des Hexenmeisters!! Ha ha ha ha... So..." DT/EQ: „"See here! This is the curse of the sorcerer! Ha ha ha ha... So..." OE: "See that?! BEHOLD the curse of a Mage! Ha ha ha ha! Now..." (NOTE: ...English, you're not even trying to hide the "sorcerer" thing...)

Vaati: „!! Leer?! Was zum...?! Die Truhe hat nur die Monster versiegelt?" DT: „!! Empty?! What the...?! The Chest (x) only the Monsters sealed?" EQ: "!! Empty?! What the...?! The Chest only sealed the Monsters?" OE: "What?! It's EMPTY! It really WASN'T sealing anything but spirits?!"

Vaati: „Na, auch gut. Ich weiß, dass sich das Force in Hyrule befindet. Ich werde in Ruhe danach suchen... He he he he..." DT: „Well, also good. I know, that itself the Force in Hyrule located. I will in peace then search... He he he he..." EQ: "Very well then. I know that the Force itself is located in Hyrule. I will search in peace, then... He he he he..." OE: "But I know the Light Force is in Hyrule somewhere! I guess I'll just... ...Have to keep looking for it. Heh heh heh."

Link: „Uhm... Autsch. Zel... da... bist du...?!" DT/EQ: „"Um... Ouch. Zel... da... are you...?!" OE: "Ungh. Owww. Z... Zelda, are you all right?"

Link: „Zelda?! Sie ist versteinert!!" DT/EQ: „"Zelda?! She is petrified!!" OE: "Zelda?! Sh-She's been turned to STONE!"

König Dartus: „Zelda!! Wie konnte dass nur passieren...?" DT: „Zelda!! How could this only happen...?" EQ: "Zelda!! How could this have happened...?" OE: "Zelda! How could this happen?!"

Minister Friedrich: „Wie shrecklich..." DT/EQ: „"How dreadful..." OE: "Return to normal!"

Toneffekte: „Wuäh wuäh wuäh" DT/EQ: „"Wah wah wah" OE: "Boo hoo hoo hoo"

Minister Friedrich: „Eure Majestät! Wie kann sie geheilt werden?!" DT: „Your Majesty! How can she healed be?!" EQ: "Your Majesty! How can she be healed?!" OE: "Your Majesty, is there no way to bring the Princess back?!"

König Dartus: „Der Fluch ist mit der heiligen Macht des Schwertes der Minish zu brechen..." DT: „The curse is with the holy might (of) the Sword (of) the Minish to break..." EQ: "The curse is to be broken with the holy might of the Sword of the Minish..." OE: "The Sacred Sword... The Picori Blade has the power to remove a Mage's curse." (NOTE: *slams drink for every usage of "Mage"*)

König Dartus: „Aber Vaati hat das Schwert zerstört. Doch die Minish sind in der Lage, das Schwert zu reparieren." DT: „But Vaati (x) the Sword destroyed. Still the Minish are in the position, the Sword to repair." EQ: "But Vaati destroyed the Sword. Still, the Minish are in the position to repair the Sword." OE: "Unfortunately, Vaati broke that, too! And only the Picori can restore it."

Alberich: „Minish? Ihr meint... das Minish-Volk aus der Legende?" DT/EQ: „"Minish? You mean... the Minish-people from the legends?" OE: "The Picori?! But the Picori are only a legend..."

König Dartus: „Minish existieren wirklich. Dieses Geheimnis hütet die Königsfamilie... Die Minish leben im Tyloria-Wald." DT: „Minish exist really. This secret treasured the Royal-family... The Minish live in Tyloria-Forest." EQ: "Minish really exist. This secret was treasured by the Royal Family... The Minish live in Tyloria-Forest." OE: "The Picori race really DOES exist. It's a secret known only to the Royal Family. They live in the Minish Woods."

Minister Friedrich: „Wir senden nun die Soldaten aus!" DT: „We send only the Soldiers out!" EQ: "We'll send out the Soldiers!" OE: "Then let's send Soldiers there!"

König Dartus: „Nein... Keine Soldaten!" DT/EQ: „"No... No Soldiers!" OE: "Alas... ...We can't."

Minister Friedrich: „Warum das denn?" DT: „Why that then?" EQ: "Why is that?" OE: "Why not?!"

König Dartus: „Erwachsene können die Minish nicht sehen. Deshalb werden die Soldaten sie nie finden." DT: „Adults can the Minish not see. Therefore will the Soldiers them never find." EQ: "Adults cannot see the Minish. Therefore, the Soldiers will never find them." OE: "Adults cannot see the Picori. The Soldiers would never dind them."

Minister Friedrich: „Hmmm..." DT/EQ: „"Hmmm..." OE: "Drat!"

Link: „Ich gehe! Lasst mich das machen, Eure Majestät!!" DT: „I go! Let me this do, Your Majesty!!" EQ: "I'll go! Let me do this, Your Majesty!!" OE: "Your Majesty, send me! I'll go to the Minish Woods and find the Picori!"

Alberich: „Link! Untersteh dich..." DT: „Link! Submit yourself..." EQ: "Link! Don't you dare..." OE: "Link! Don't be so impudent!" (NOTE: Okay, this is one huge idiom... An old-fashioned one, at that.)

König Dartus: „Schon gut, Alberich." DT: „Already good, Alberich." EQ: "It's okay, Alberich." OE: "Master Weaponsmith, wait...!" (NOTE: *gives up on the Viz English version*)

König Dartus: „Link ist Zeldas Sandkastenfreund. Ich bitte dich, Link... Zeige das zerbrochene Schwert den Minish im Wald. Und lerne, wie man es repariert." DT: „Link is Zelda's childhood-friend. I beg you, Link... Show the broken Sword (to) the Minish in (the) Forest. And learn, how one it repairs." EQ: "Link is Zelda's childhood friend. I beg of you, Link... Show the broken Sword to the Minish in the Forest. And learn how one repairs it." OE: "It seems only right for Link to take on this quest since... ...He and the Princess are friends. Take the Sword to the Minish Woods, Link. Ask the Picori how to reforge it."

Link: „Jawohl!" DT/EQ: „"Yessir!" OE: "Yes, Your Majesty!"

Alberich: „Warte, Link! Auf dem Weg lauern sicher Gefahren. Nimm dies hier mit." DT: „Wait, Link! Of the way lurk itself dangers. Take this here with." EQ: "Wait, Link! Dangers lurk along the way. Take this along." OE: "Wait, Link! The road you travel will be dangerous. Take this." (NOTE: IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE, TAKE THIS.)

Alberich: „Das beste Stück, das ich je gemacht habe. Gib dir Mühe für die Prinzessin!!" DT: „The best piece, that I ever made (x). Give your effort for the Princess!!" EQ: "The best Piece that I ever made. Give your all for the Princess!!" OE: "I put my heart and soul into this blade. Use it to save the Princess!"

Link: „Ein Schwert! Es ist echt! Tausend Dank, Opa!!" DT/EQ: „"A Sword! It is real! Thousand thanks, Grandpa!!" OE: "A Sword! A REAL Sword! Thank you, Grandfather!"

Link: „Nie werde ich Vaati verzeihen! Warte auf mich, Zelda. Ich werde dich von diesem Fluch befreien!" DT: „Never will I Vaati forgive! Wait for me, Zelda. I will you from this curse free!" EQ: "I'll never forgive Vaati! Wait for me, Zelda. I'll free you from this curse!" OE: "I'll bring you back, Zelda! I promise! I'll make Vaati PAY for doing this to you!"

Hofstaat: „Eure Majestät! Überall in Hyrule tauchen Monster auf!" DT: „Your Majesty! Overall in Hyrule emerging Monsters (x)!" EQ: "Your Majesty! Monsters are emerging all over in Hyrule!" OE: "I bring news, m'lord! Evil spirits are attacking all over!" (NOTE: „auftauchen").

Alberich: „Was?!" DT/EQ: „"What?!" OE: "What?!"

König Dartus: „Vaati hat sie gerade entfesselt... Die Soldaten übernehmen die Monster. Du gehst zum Tyloria-Wald! Nimm diese Karte von Hyrule." DT: „Vaati (x) them just released... The Soldiers take-on the Monsters. You go to (the) Tyloria-Forest! Take this Map of Hyrule." EQ: "Vaati just released them... The Soldiers will take on the Monsters. You go to Tyloria-Forest! Take this Map of Hyrule." OE: "When the Sword broke, Vaati also released the spirits! The Castle Guards will have to drive away the evil spirits. Link, here is a Map of Hyrule. Waste not a moment. Go to the Minish Woods!"

Link: „Das ist also der Tyloria-Wald... Wo finde ich bloß die Minish?" DT: „This is so the Tyloria-Forest... Where find I just the Minish?" EQ: "So, this is Tyloria-Forest... Just where do I find the Minish?" OE: "Is THIS the Minish Woods? I wonder where the Picori are?"

Link: „Heeey!! Minish, kommt raus! Minish? Huhu, Minish!!" DT/EQ: „"Heeey!! Minish, come out! Minish? Yoo-hoo, Minish!!" OE: "Hellloooo! C'mon out, Picori! We need you! Picori? Where the heck are you?!" (NOTE: ...It literally never occurred to me until just now that the reason the Minish never came out is because they don't understand him...)

Link: „Es ist doch das hundertste Jahr, in dem sich das Tor öffnet! Ich dachte, Kinder können die Minish sehen?!" DT: „It is still the hundredth year, in the/which itself the Gate opens! I think, children can the Minish see?!" EQ: "It's still the hundredth year in which the Gate opens! I thought children could see the Minish?!" OE: "Is this NOT the one-hundredth year, when the Door to the Picori World opens?! Maybe it's just not true that kids can see the Picori?!"

Toneffekte: „Keuch japs japs" DT/EQ: „"Wheeze gasp gasp" OE: "Wheeeze puff huff"

Link: „UH Moment... Ich hab ja nie an Minish geglaubt..." DT: „UH Moment... I (x) indeed never in Minish believed..." EQ: "UH Wait a moment... I really never believed in Minish..." OE: "GASP Or Maybe... ...I can't see Picori because I NEVER believed in them?"

Link: „Vielleicht bin ich daher nicht mehr unschuldig... Und kann die Minish deshalb gar nicht sehen?!" DT: „Maybe am I hence not more innocent... And can the Minish therefore at all not see?!" EQ: "Maybe I'm not innocent anymore... And therefore can't see the Minish at all?!" OE: "I'm young, but my innocence is GONE! That MUST be it! Even though I'm a kid, I CAN'T see them! Not with THESE jaded eyes!"

Toneffekte: „Entsetzen!" DT/EQ: „"Dismay!" OE: "Oh noooooo!"

Link: „Was mach ich bloß...? Ich kann nichts tun, solange ich die Minish nicht finde..." DT: „What do I just...? I can nothing do, as-long I the Minish not find..." EQ: "Just what do I do...? I can't do anything as long as I don't find the Minish..." OE: "What should I do? If I don't find the Picori, Princess Zelda is doomed!"

Toneffekte: „Hach..." DT/EQ: „"Haa..." OE: "SLUMP" (NOTE: As far as I can tell, this is a sigh.)

Link: „?" DT/EQ: „"?" OE: "?"

Toneffekte: „Wisch" DT/EQ: „"Wipe" OE: "Rub rub"

Link: „Äh... Ich sehe da was Komisches..." DT: „Ah... I see there what comical..." EQ: "Ah... I'm seeing something comical there..." OE: "Hmmm... ...That looks a little weird!"

Ezelo: „Au! Autsch!" DT/EQ: „"Ow! Ouch!" OE: "Quit it! Ow! That hurts!"

Toneffekte: „Batsch! Batsch!" DT/EQ: „"Bash! Bash!" OE: "WHACK SMACK"

Ezelo: „He! Zu Hilfe!" DT: „Hey! To help!" EQ: "Hey! Help me!" OE: "Hey, someone... Anyone... HELLLLP!"