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if any milgram fans would like to send in your favorite character ships/friendships... i would like to doodle them :-) <3 (edit: now closed!! thank you everyone! <33)
#l.v. prattles#i take requests like once a year. so here is that time <3.#i’m not super good at drawing character interactions so consider it practice… 💛#friends are also welcome to come ask for anything else :> it’s just clear what my current obsession is fnskfnj <333
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Adding up Sunny to the spikey pile of my ocs ☀🪓
Another goober for @evillillad 's metal au >:3c
The typical rebel kid character that rejects any kind of authority and likes to do silly shenanigans and pranks (violence) for fun. Despite the mischief they can cause, Sunny is rather shy in person.
Their music preference is a blend of mostly punk rock,grunge, nu metal and hip hop genres and it's pretty inconsistent as they enjoy giving a listen to new things frequently
The type of guy that dresses like emo Adam Sandler on daily basis but gives the best fashion advice if you ask her. Enjoys art in any shape and form, loves to craft things himself (sewing preferably) and if you happen to become their friend you'll most likely regularly receive some funky handmade stuff from her :3
Speaking of friends I don't think they'd have much or any at all, like what life did you expect after running away from home Sunny smhhhh.
But Sunny has his cats and he's happy about it!! Lives by herself with at least a couple of them
Few doodles + not colored ver cuz it looks nicer to me
#heehoo having fun changing up my ocs for this au#juggalo unicorn let's goo💪💪💥#just a lil guy wants some company to do silly shit together#not too awkward to beat someone's ass yet too awkward to make friends 💔💔#welcome home#welcome home oc#welcome home puppet show#wh metal au#sunny silly#juggalo sunny#original character#basically an art (fashion) nerd who knows how to swing an axe#coming from this he's a very protective friend (older sibling vibes without being officially anyone's sibling)#silly guy sometimes comes to Frank's cafe just to chill here and scribble something in her sketchbook#and it's either a new tattoo idea or one of the customers huahshjh
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Weird Horsegirl Ganondorf fun fact of today is that in Ocarina of Time Ganondorf rides without a bridle! Even in the concept art his horse lacks any bit or reigns (as does Epona, and every other horse).
What it mainly means is that the N64 didn't have the power to mess with an unnecessary complex item to render -- but what it could be interpreted to mean for the sake of fandom fun is that the horses are raised and trained to be ridden bridleless.
Not to be up my own headcanons about horses being a big thing in Gerudo Valley and Malon's mom being Gerudo and there being a reason that Gan's horse is specified as a pure black Gerudo Stallion because other Gerudo horses don't look like that but -- have you seen the dressings on the other horses?
All of them, even Zelda's horse, have a call to Gerudo patterning. Except for Epona, who was only able to be approached, touched, and ridden by Link and presumably Malon herself.
It's no secret that the Gerudo are more or less pulled from African and Arabic cultures, but fun fact about Arabian horses, they used to be given as prized gifts to royalty and important political figures.
So if they are inspired by Arabian horse history --
Although the specific area of the Arabian Peninsula where the breed originated can’t be pinpointed, it is widely accepted that around 2500 B.C., the Bedouin people were responsible for developing the desert horses that became the ancestors of the Arabian horse. The nomads’ keen horse sense and meticulous attention to proper care and breeding created an animal that could withstand the harsh environment of the desert, surviving extreme heat and cold with little water and the food they shared with their handlers. A life of travel also required horses with great lung capacity, endurance and stamina. (x)
It's very possible that all of the horses in OoT have ancestry in Gerudo Valley!
#lays on the ground and thinks about how Zelda's horse might've been a gift from Gerudo Valley celebrating her birth#anyway i'll be over here!!! thinking about Gerudo and Horses and still being salty I can't ride in the desert in the wilds era aklsjd#clinging to my Malon's Mom Was Gerudo because usually dairy farmers don't breed horses -- it's a different specialty and a full time job#and Talon is definitely more dairy farmer so. It makes sense to me that Mama was doing the horse breeding. And mama had the red hair.#And Ingo was SO eager to kiss Gan's ass which seems to me like he's been there before -- and he wouldn't if his horse was Gerudo bred#anyway tl;dr this is a hill i cry on#I told my friends once that I hc the Gerudo came to get Mal's mom when she got sick and she refused to leave even if it would've saved her#and that they would come back for her body so she could be buried in her homeland#and when Malon was old enough she'd be welcome there but of course when Malon was old enough Ingo didn't let her leave#and she wouldn't leave the horses behind -- just like her mama. there was just no safe way to get herself and the animals out#anyway. :) good morning.#lozhc#oot eidolon
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Junicrane/Starstruck Ramble
I will not be brief, all under the cut
To clear some things right off the bat:
No corpse, no proof with Juniper. Obligatory this is set in a canon where he's alive and adjacent to the agency in some way.
Reggie & Juniper are just gay to me, but I don't mind any interpretation of their sexuality
The games are set in 1967/68 to me (based on a couple bits in game) which is before it was legal to be gay in America at least (1971), which is relevant to how I interpret canon as being somewhat grounded in reality, despite unrealistic elements.
This is just an insane amount of headcanons/elements of and AU all culminated into one post. I will talk about some headcanons like they're just facts because they are established in my head, and it saves me over explaining literally everything, however I will explain some parts a little bit for clarity.
Alright. Actual beginning of the ramble:
Juniper is a character to me who had gotten so lost in his job as an actor and a social presence that in the end his whole life revolved around that 'role'. Because of this, by the time he's put into the situation where he's around the Agency, he basically knows nothing about himself, though he doesn't realise at first. Furthermore, what little identity he had has changed in so many ways. He's no longer a beloved famous actor in the prominence of public light, he's legally dead and he tarnished his career just before he was supposed to die, with the bonus of that making him lose the majority of his estate. From that, he also has horrific facial scarring from the electrical burns from literally having his face fried. I believe a friend of mine made a post about this a while ago (I also think they were the first to think it up also), but, to me, Juniper has a permanent trimmer in his right arm (aka his dominant hand) from the electrical current and it is messing with his nervous system.
All in all, he's not doing great, but he's too proud to admit that he's not doing great, because if anything, what's left of his ego is all he has as a defense since he's deep in unfamiliar water.
Before ending up around the agency (I have multiple interpretations of this, so I'm just going to bring it up generally), he'd never actually seen Reggie, and his only impression of him is a single voicemail, which was his only reference he had to later impersonate him. Juniper probably has very little feelings other than the ones he projects onto him because of Phoenix and that, at the very least, he's physically attracted to Reggie to some degree (that's like the beginning of how everything else would tumble into place in this sort of interpretation at least).
And on Crane's side? His feelings towards Juniper are probably very intense and muddled. On the one hand, he adores musical theatre, and that's his now ex-favourite actor. The thought of just casually being around him blows the bit of fanboy in him away at first because THAT'S the GUY, plus the inklings of a celebrity crush which still poke at him. And then there's the rational side of him, which knows Juniper has committed absolute atrocities on the side of Zoraxis, and hates him for that. Then there's how much Juniper comes off as an asshole at first because he refuses to cooperate with anything the Agency tried to put in place. He finds Juniper endlessly frustrating, and yet he's stuck working with him since, afterall, he's the one who knows the Agency's history with Juniper the best. I imagine him acting a lot like how he does IEYTD 1 around Juniper.
At this point, I'm just describing the pitch for a romcom.
I think the start of their relationship with one another largely started with Juniper trying to wind Crane up. It was a way of getting his attention, and I don't think Juniper knows why he's so dead set on that at first, because I don't think he realises he has a crush on 'this grump' at first. (I think that's actually the fun part about these two, because it's almost like a role reversal of the celebrity crush dynamic. This ex-big name actor has a TERRIBLE crush on an average joe and it is KILLING HIM.) But of course the Agency keeps them together because Juniper is at least conversing with Crane, so it's a start.
Through one way or another, they actually get talking casually, at least mildly at first. It takes Juniper a long time to fully deconstruct the wall he's built, and the thing is, Crane isn't the one trying to deconstruct it, at least at first, because yeah, Juniper realises if he wants Reggie to actually like him in any way, he can't keep winding him up. So they talk. Small talk at first, something rhythmic and almost easy to keep to a script. And over time that turns into actual conversations. Genuine ones in which Reggie rips out the occasional one of his jokes which Juniper is endlessly endeared about. The way he smiles just before he makes them, like he wants to chuckle at what he's about to say before he says it. That's probably when Juniper realised that he does have some vague crush on him, and that it wasn't going away.
This is what kickstarts John I can't-buy-you-things-to-impress-you-so-acts-of-service-it-is Juniper to do little things for him. It mostly starts off as him trying to make Reggie his tea how he likes it. However, the nerve damage in his arm makes that hard, as the weight of the kettle and trying to pour is hard all of a sudden. And he refuses to accept that, so he tries for a very long while. Long enough that Crane would go to investigate what was going on. And when he does see Juniper leaning over a cup with the kettle as he uneasily tries to pour it, and when Crane asks Juniper responds so matter-of-fact that his intention is nothing but genuine. And it catches Reggie off guard because Juniper hadn't done anything like that up to that point, and his very apparent vulnerability is so clearly on show.
It shifts something between them.
From that point on, conversations are longer, more familiar. Both of their attitudes soften, and Reggie makes more jokes. Juniper learns how to better use his left hand while strengthening his right back to a point where it could be used again. Slowly, they're both spending time with one another not because they have to, but just because they can. Little bits at first, not too far outside what they already were doing, but those little bits turned into long bits to a point where the other person's company was genuinely desirable.
As time passes, Juniper probably realises that he doesn't genuinely know much about himself or what hobbies he's into, because he never really had the time when he got big, and his home life in his youth wasn't bad, but it wasn't picturesque. I think Reggie would pick up on it, and absolutely try to introduce him to some things he's into. Some things stick, other things don't (corn husking very much stays Reggie's passion, and John will go with him sometimes because it's him, but it's not something he strongly cares for). Crane introduces him to a lot of music, and it's something that becomes a staple between them, with tracks they listen to more than others (tragically, I know relatively little about 60s music so I couldn't really say what). Occasionally they dance, never anything intense, think slow dancing, but the closeness is nice.
Through all of it, Juniper is battling the worst crush of his life, and he can't stand it, because I think he struggles to read people since he doesn't have anything like a script or a director to refer back to, so he has no idea if Reggie likes him back or if he's just desperate for that to be true. I think because of that any sort of confession between them would be incredibly raw, not only because of the time they live in making it hard for them to be truthful about how they love, but because it's a complete show of Juniper who's worked to be this better person. I don't exactly know how that would go, mainly because I don't have one set version of their dynamic, this post is just a generalisation of main consistent points.
Reggie does like him back, because he's gotten used to Juniper being just this guy, not a figure in the public eye, not a Zoraxis lackey, and not any sort of Agency operative (despite being under their care to some degree). He's someone he genuinely cares for, because they've given one another the time of day to learn one another, and I think because Reggie was a field agent, he was a lot better at reading Juniper than Juniper was at reading him. Eventually Juniper's company becomes something he could see around him for the rest of his life, and I think he accepts that he likes Juniper a lot more gracefully.
I think any affection directed at Juniper would at first be met with him feeling a little muddled. Reggie was a very physically affectionate person when he could be, and sure the initial flirting with one another came with the occasional little touches, but everything now was so deeply intentional. I also don't think Juniper would almost ever get over the novelty of being able to kiss him, or many other gestures, because it made the fact that they were together so very real, and it was great. I do think it comes easier to Reggie, and it's a big way of showing how much he cares, so it's important for Juniper to try and show it back because he knows how much it means to the other.
I like the idea of them eventually living with one another, too. I think Juniper would have always had a quiet little daydream of sorts where he does just live a domestic quiet life, and he can with Reggie (well, as close as they can get between the Agency and Zoraxis always being at odds), and he loves that, and he loves him, and it's immense.
I think they cook for one another a lot, it helps Juniper work on his dexterity in a controlled environment, which means a lot because it's a huge point of insecurity (that and his scars). He does improve, and Crane is proud of that and shows it and it's great. I also think they'd probably cook together too, because they can deal with being in the kitchen together and they work well with one another. It's probably a good way for them to unwind because over time they can do it in relative silence.
As I said before, I also think music is a staple in their household, and that Reggie listens to things on vinyl almost all of the time because he likes the background noise. Sometimes Juniper will catch him chuntering along to the music which he finds endlessly endearing. I wouldn't put it past his dramatic ass to also join in to fluster Reggie, but I also don't think Reggie would mind that terribly because Juniper has listened to the music enough to know the lyrics, and that's huge to him.
I don't think they are without rough patches, no relationship is, but I think the good part about them is that they're willing to talk about it (... eventually). They're used to long conversations, and while they're often less fun conversations, they're needed and they know that, and it works out.
Alright. I think I'm done for now. I haven't mentioned everything, but this definitely got the worst of it out of my system. If you ever want to hear any specific thoughts my ask box is open but other than that, behold my general dynamic for these two which has been festering in my head for years. I think they're great
#ty right-agent for explicitly telling me that this would be welcomed you a real one#i had a massive babble to my friend abt what if they all feed me to the hounds for speaking#and he said “girl that fandom is like 12 people big they need you to speak” and yeah that also helped#i have a hard time talking if I'm not asked/prompted to that's why i adding tags is great for me. that and i like the format#anyways.#THESE TWO.............dear lord can you tell I have been unwell abt them forever..#this is propeganda (/j) for them. btw. please you have to understand the potential here. it's so good.#it's slowburn <- my (probably) demiromantic ass cannot handle romance without a build up and this set up is perfect (it will never happen)#also i find it easier to write ANYTHING between these two from Juniper's perspective because i find it easier to get into his head#idk reggie is like the gay version of the: what is he thinking of? i could take a bear in a fight. audio ive heard.#whereas with juniper i have him trapped under a microscope#im going to tag this now so i can use the remaining tags to RANT#ieytd#john juniper#reginald crane#junicrane#starstruck#i expect you to die#<- being BRAVE!!!#when I get really excited i start getting like this internal shaking feeling and uh. yeah this rant started that#the worst part abt that is it also triggers my tourettes so like. double whammy. excited about blorbos? jail :(#but. yeah I uh. yeah. sorry this IS so long..I did warn but . AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHAUUUUUUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH#also i did this rant in 2 parts. last night and this morning so yeah uh. yeah.#god im so messed up about these two#make me a boat by the family crest came on while wroting this and while it's mainly a roxanix song to me......AUUUUUG.....#i struggle to find music for these sillies because they have such a specific vibe to me amd I've not quite managed to find something which -#- genuinely feels correct for them and it drives me up the WALL#GOD NIGHT SHIFT JUST CAME OF SHUFFL.....all my ieytd songs are coming out to drive me up the wall.......#FINISHED I've been adding tags as I've gone alonga#thank you for reading hope you enoyed and if you didn't im sorry
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. . .
#i dont really know what to say on here at all#anybodys welcome to come to me to talk if they need to but im just#im just so exhausted#ive been sick on and off for over a week but i cant use too much sick time because#ill run out of time to see my parents later this year#and i cant just not go because i need to keep my health insurance#now that i have more than one chronic illness#theres wild shit going on at our house thats making me paranoid and anxious of someone stalking us#or trying to hurt my roommate#and now. this#its so selfish to make it about me and truly it isnt#im worried for my baby coworker who came out to me as trans#and how shell live the next four years#im worried about everyone whose been in my inbox every g/f/m i keep track of#im afraid for my friends. im afraid Of a few of my coworkers now that i know#but mostly im just. so fucking tired#im so tired#and im so sorry#was it so silly to be a little hopeful#and not even hopeful for a good outcome. i know we dont have those. just not This one#rowan chatter#tbd
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On this wonderful Wednesday I come with a question.
What's a story you'd love to write but you're not sure if you can/will be able to?
For whatever reason. Might be (perceived) skill, time, complexity, you simply can't figure out how it'd go...
I have two. On one hand, I'd love to write a reality show type of fic (love island ryatt you live in my head rent free) we just have a technical issue (I don't actively watch reality TV). And also, and this one has been in my head FOR YEARS. An El internado (the boarding house? Spanish TV show from my childhood) inspired fic BUT I CAN NEVER FIGURE IT OUT
What are the stories that haunt you, my friends?
#yeah I'm slowly coming back to be a nuisance here you're welcome :)#also and this is super important. fake hanahaki is back on the board friends#let's see how it goes. relevant because I could never figure it out for months this year#valstuff#my writing
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oh the inherent healing of rearranging your home. love is stored here.
#i’m using my day off to turn my living room into a *living room*#and 🥰 man the joy is unmatched for real#i go to bed in disbelief that this really is my home. i wake up looking at my balcony just hoping for spring to come soon#hoping for money too hahah your bitch is broke but MAN!!!#i’m gonna have a wonderful balcony soon 🥹 to sit!!! and hide away from the summer sun bc it faces north. hhhh#man i’m. i’m so good. i’m haunted and i feel tiny and too big at the same time but i’m. at the same time i’m so so good#i have a couch. i have a bed. i don’t have a table or chairs yet and can’t use the balcony for anything but standing but 🥹#man. feeling like this reminds me that humans are inherently good. because i’m human. and i’m so so good.#summer will come whether i’m patient or not#like fr sometimes i stop in my day to remember that this is foreal my home. this is my apartment. mine. i get to have this 🥹#and through all the horrible and wonderful things that will come it will be here and welcome me like an old friend 🥹#these walls are alive and they know i’m haunted but they don’t care. they remain. and there is no feeling quite like this
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hi! oh my goodness. i am SO sorry i didn’t say anything earlier. i did read everything a couple days ago, and i Have been chewing on it, rotating it in my mind, etc etc…..and the graphic has been my phone lockscreen since i first read it!!!!!
frankly i am obsessed and have also been a little frazzled this month lol. saw your post late because of the general whirlwind that is december and then couldn’t quite get my thoughts into sufficient words n got worried “oh no would it be weird to say something now…..” which is incredibly silly in retrospect, so sorry for that.
i’m relatively new to hockey fandom and the Narratives don’t always quite click for me (yet, at least :)) because i don’t know all of the lore for a lot of the popular pairings haha, so it means a lot that you’ve taken time out of your day to break things down for me and share your own thoughts <3 tysm. again, super sorry for the delayed response. i’m very sorry if you felt as though you’d wasted your time or something along those lines :’) just wanted to let you know that i really appreciate you and the time it took you to get everything down and make the graphic!!!! and like i can’t overstate how much your tags both over here and on your other blog have helped me to Get It since the start of this season, so thank you.
but now the house is quiet, the in-laws are gone, and no new work stuff until january :) so i can finally get some stuff down. every point you brought up hits in it own way but gosh you are very incredibly right the mcstrome of it all…..that’s sort of the lens i’ve been listening to the song through since you mentioned it.
the golden boy and the “draft bust” and the ever present notion of “isn’t it all about old friends? like everything? all of it?”. like idk looking back on a bestfriendship from when you were a teenager that was Super intense and the lines were blurred and maybe realizing (if you hadn’t had the words or the “guts” or awareness or wtv to put a name to it at that point in your life) that y’all were a smidge more than just friends.
best friends forever until you just aren’t! growing up and growing apart. it’s just the way things go but it can and will ache for a damn long time! you think you’re over it until their birthday or the holidays roll around and you wonder in a distant sort of way who they’re spending it with. what you would’ve hypothetically gotten them as a present if you still spoke. what do they even like nowadays, anyway?
maybe having the friendship end subtly. going from playing and traveling together and living in one another’s pockets to 2,080 miles of distance? (i may have my timeline/details confused here so sorry in advance) texting as much as you can at first but he’s a phenom he’s mcjesus he’s the next in line he’s expected to win the cup with his new team and end the drought for Canada. and they have him now but he was yours first, wasn’t he? but it’s fine. because you’re busy too. you’re captaining the team now. you’re gonna get the memorial cup that he couldn’t. it’s fine. you’re fine. you don’t even have time to worry about it anyway.
one conversation a week turns to one a month turns to once in a blue moon turns to stale words until it goes cold. these days you can’t quite seem to remember who ended things, but does it really matter all that much now?
or maybe it doesn’t end like that at all. maybe it ends in a flurry of angry words and digs in some or other of the endless hotel rooms you’ve shared together over the years. who knows!
and that’s not even getting into the rest of the 2015 draft class. or the ld19 of it all! ooh hoo hoo. you grew up with him but he’s not your waiting room. he grew up with you but he’ll grow “old” (end his career) with someone else. and isn’t that just something!
i don’t think it’s totally them, but sort of the sentiment of “I hope you get everything you ever wanted and I hope I never hear a word about it.” I want one ticket off of your carousel!!!! merry christmas, please don’t call!!!!!!!
dylan being sent up and down and traded around until finally landing in washington, a place where he is clearly at home and LOVED for the guy and player he is!!!!!!!! watching a game and seeing all the strome jerseys in the crowd……..wagh.
all that said. some other songs that are mcstrome to me in various ways: hot & heavy by lucy dacus (lol kinda the whole song). before the world was big by girlpool (“i just miss how it felt standing next to you wearing matching [jerseys? sweaters?] before the world was big”). happiness by Taylor swift (“i guess it’s the price i pay for seven years in heaven”), cut your bangs by radiator hospital (maybe? possibly? unsure. i like the whole dog thing there). i’m so glad i feel this way about you by insignificant other (!!!!!). there are so many THEM lyrics in there……..waough.
anyway. other things off the top of my head: 2015 connor specifically saying something like “hey let’s wait a minute so we can see this” to stand by the stage when dylan was getting drafted after him. MAN. you reminded me of the fact that they couldn’t even make eye contact at the handshake line!!!!!!!!! they didn’t go to each other’s weddings!!!!!!!!!! (do you think once upon a time they ever thought they’d being each other’s best man?). just a couple months ago dylan liking the tweet of connor getting that goal during the playoffs!!!!!!!! makes you wonder if he texted him………..
lol this was all over the place and i was probably wrong on some things and there’s SO much more that someone else could say way more eloquently, but i digress. i dunno everything about them is so nuts to me!!!!! needless to say i will be incredibly sat for the game january 21 🙂↕️
thank you again for your time :) hope you have a good one and a happy rest of the holiday season! <3333333
what a lovely message to receive 🥰😭🥹 i had to break it up into chunks because i couldn't sit down to read all of it at once without just. bouncing right back up and shrieking. i am also at heart terribly shy so i understand the struggle but it is never too late to say something <3 you are always welcome here
first!!! i love sharing!! i think most of hockey tumblr loves to see people finding out the Lore for the first time and the wonderful thing about hockey is that. it keeps going on. so there's years and years and generations and generations and always something new to learn about. i've learned to just not be afraid to ask!!! between different teams and players i'm always discovering new narratives (learning about the sharks old man yaoi rn... cbj rarepairs...)
no... to my heart's despair... you have the timeline right. i think in the best most tragic sense there's a mcstrome narrative where it is truly that nothing went wrong. the love was there. we couldn't do enough to save it because we didn't see it slipping away. i didn't notice when you didn't call until you never did. i don't know you now but i still remember when i did, do you?
HE'S NOT YOUR WAITING ROOM?? passing out. i do see "i hope you get everything you ever wanted and i hope i never hear a word about it" as them because!! they didn't go to each other's weddings!!! i don't wish you harm but i'm not going to put myself through that!! i hope you're happy and i'm never going to look on purpose.
i love dylan strome so much and the best part is that they all love him so much too. he wore a cool vintage ovechkin jacket!! and got slapped in the face with a tortilla!! he loves to gently rag on the rookies!! it just takes some time, everything'll be just fine. you're only on the middle of the ride.
OKAY WHEN I READ THIS PART I SCREAMED BECAUSE I DO HAVE A MCSTROME PLAYLIST AND!!!! HOT & HEAVY BY LUCY DACUS IS IN FACT ON IT!!! SO IS CUT YOUR BANGS (BUT BY GIRLPOOL SO DOUBLE JINX)!!!! i have dorothea by taylor swift on there but i don't know happiness so i'll have to give all the other songs a listen. mostly i just shrieked because i was like NO YOU GOT THE VIBES EXACTLY
🧠〰️🧠 truly the mind meld happening here. the handshake line. the mutual wedding non-invitations. i won't block your number or your name on twitter i just hope i don't see it come up on screen!! i do think that we got confirmation the last time they played each other that dylan did text him to say congrats on a milestone but i would have to check the archives
p.s. i think you said it perfectly eloquently :) what matters is that you said it at all and i was delighted to read it 💕
#liv in the replies#HI HI HI HELLO!!! IT'S SO NICE TO HEAR FROM U i hope u have a lovely quiet end of the year <3 with lots of time to rest & find ur own joy#& YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE SORRY!!!! <33333 ANY MESSAGE IS A GOOD ONE!!! WHEN I TELL YOU I 🥹💕😭☺️🥰🦋💕💗‼️‼️❣️❣️ UPON RECEIVING THIS HEARTS FOR THU#ALSO IMPORTANT😭😭 I DIDN'T MEAN TO GUILT TRIP U I HOPE U DIDN'T TAKE IT THAT WAY i personally just. need to work on reblogging my own stuff#i hate reblogging my own fic announcements even so i was like listen this is for ME because EYE want it here and that's FINE. ok brain???#and also i think i have just accepted the slide that there WILL be hrpf here mostly because i keep tagging it but i always don't want to#plug this blog over on cbpc-hrpf or anything bc do you really need to follow me in multiple places or is that just being greedy you know.#obviously i don't because why else would i be dithering in the tags. anyway tl;dr i consider u beloved & also my friend welcome in the dms#at any time always. i hope everybody knows just yeet yourselves in there i am a Yapper and i love discussing. getting asks is one of my#favorite things :))) & getting messages from people is how u make friends!!! sometimes u tell people u love their work & now u are bffl <3#we all have like. Quintessential Moments that are secretly niche & the joy of going U DON'T KNOW ABOUT IGUANA WRESTLING??? is unmatched#also do you want to publish that poetry like?? hit after hit after hit. three paragraph six feet under. put it on the ao3 second person pov#dylan strome sitting at his fogged up kitchen window looking at the snow outside in washington the same as it was in erie the way it never#was in arizona and thinking about you know. maybe you know now what it was then. and does it matter? and in the end#he sees his girls run through the yard snowballs in their hands when he's done thinking everything through and he puts on his mittens and#walks out the door to his life. into the cold unknown you know. honorary fuckin' mention to what has secretly been percolating in my head#ever since i said the fogged glass window which is the one that knocks ME the fuck out every time but is so strongly a dylan/zach song to m#dream song by shallow alcove. just wanna press my nose up to the glass of your life. EYE cannot mcstrome w/that but it is incredibly vibes#also just. the queer experience of that Intense Friendship that you’re like WOW uh. maybe i need to think some things now. assigned to Them#HELP SOS what is ld19??? you will have to come explain this to me i fear. oh no you have to send me another message 😈 my brain said leon#but also london knights because mitch marner and the draft class of 2015. also had to laugh like i started singing phoebe bridgers waiting#room then immediately went into the argument of defying gravity 'i hope you're happy' (OBCR) because. i think they wish they could be spite#maybe. but maybe they know they only want them to be happy. also with the handshake... me when i. think about updating the goodnight chicag#cam now that stromer's in washington goodnight chicago goodnight indeed. DO WE EVEN WANT TO TALK ABOUT KITTY?? DEBRINCAT???? ALSO IN ERIE#also me🤝you🤝 caps/oilers game. they're like oh are u sick of the mcstrome teammates broadcast and i say no never thank u with my popcorn.#mcstrome
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Here comes the ☀️Boy☀️
#Here comes the boy#hello boy#Welcome#here he is#Sorry#that cute thing got stuck in my head#but I love him!!#I LOVE DOGDAY SO MUCH!!!#He's just such a sweetheart!#i wish they didn't kill him off so quickly#Why can't we have a giant toy friend we can definitely trust that can help us around#it can be like security breach#Dogday can be like the supportive friend since that's what dogs are meant to do#if it weren't for dogs being known as LOYAL companions.#but ahhh!!! I love him so much#And yes.... I made him 15 feet tall. You got a problem with that buddy????#Hope not#Anyways#poppy playtime 3#poppy playtime#rambles#cute#traditional art#artists on tumblr#art#Dogday#poppy playtime fanart#poppy playtime chapter 3#poppy playtime dogday#I'll definitely do a colored version of him!
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a word to the wise sometimes the only true rest is looking beyond what you thought was success
so true! adamandi is full of wise advice such as this, including: "and you'll never feel better if you - fucking die- you stupid ass!"
#these are all very good reminders. especially during exam season (i am suffering. but at least i'm working on art coursework so it's#suffering i love.) guys i have maybe a bit too many thoughts on ambrose. sculpture. and ceramics. and studio. in my art student 3d era rn#tmr it's black and white 2d so it's vincent vibes instead... anyways. in my breaks i ended up brainstorming more doodles again so..#anywaysndhfnfjfhf sorry to detract! but like these two quotes are holding my sanity intact i think.#at this point even without listening to the live soundtrack it sounds in my head so. lasting impressions i guess. every time i get anxious#' you'll never get better if you fucking die'' sounds in my head and i go ''ah yes there's a whole life outside''#continuing this ramble you ever think how vincent went from you'll never get better if you fucking die to '' first i chose my friend#ambrose for my debut :DD'' realll quick. or also how this principle worked for when he was talking to ambrose about it and then. for himself#he didn't want to get better. he wanted quincy to get better and so '' you'll never get better if you die'' held through to the end#it just wasn't a mentality that saved him... god that screws me up. so many thoughts.#anyways anon!!!! thank you for sending this :3 made my day <33 very vibes#going to put the soundtrack on and power through studio again.. :3 adamandi asks are welcomed ngl teehee#ask me stuff???#on another note sometimes it's so surreal that actors are real people... i guess the magic of theatre is that it makes the characters come#to life.. like i believe actors are real. and deserve to be treated like people. for the record. but also when consuming media and it's the#suspension of disbelief? these are Real Characters i can't believe that someone who isn't them is making these sounds and doing these things#it's so insane. incredible. idk i just have very high admiration for the cast and idk how i got here even... akshdjdhdf#<blinks> they did such a good job akdhdnfhfbgfhff ok bye#first time i swear in the actual post on this blog and not in the tags... of course
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#oh my gosh I forgot to mention this but I got connected with the most wonderful church here#it’s an international church so there are a lot of people cycling in and out#and it’s on the 7th floor of a building and a bit hard to find#but it is absolutely wonderful and the people are so welcoming#I’ve met SO MANY people and I feel like I’m doing well with socializing for once#I made friends with a couple of girls and we’ve run around and done fun stuff together and had actual serious conversations#and like I’m wondering if one of the reasons God has me here is to teach me how to be a member of a church family independent of my family#because you know being the preachers kid—that has expectations. you’re at church on Sunday because your dad’s in the pulpit#(not that that’s actually the only reason for me but that’s what it looks like to other people)#here though I’m at church because I want to be there. I’m an independent woman who chose to come to church on her own#and I’m really enjoying it!#Val’s gone globetrotting
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Thinking about the gay Mormon kid I met in middle school and how all the other Mormons were convinced he was gay-faking and actually straight
#mormon children are so funny they be like ''if someone hears me say fuck i could be disowned and excommunicated. i support u being gay tho#i'll always support you the way you are'' <- actual unironic convos i had with my mormon friend in 5th grade#like days apart first she was like i can never swear and then when i came out to my class as bi#she was the Nicest straight person about it like of course the other girls who were questioning or already knew were supportive#straight kids had a more diverse opinion on it lol but this mormon girl got me she was so good#definitely part of my gay awakening bc i spent months being like ''i cant be bi bc if i was i would have a crush on Her. but i dont''#''i only feel this way bc she has beautiful red hair and freckles which i adore and she is super sweet to me. thats not gay''#and this went on for 3 months and then i had a wet dream about a different girl and i was like OH. well the evidence is growing#wow these tags have nothing to do with this gay mormon kid lololol nothing much to say about him#i didnt know him very well tbh like we spoke a little bit and he did come out to me but most of what i learned about him was rumors#and def i feel like he got the typical gay kid treatment of being ostracized lied about and picked on#idk why you would choose to subject urself to that if u arent ssa like it is not easy to be out in this area#its maybe not Dangerous bc more people are coming out every year but its certainly still viewed as a severe sin#its not seen as a neutral thing by mosr churches although several churches have sprung up that specifically welcome and accept lgbt people#thats a super interesting divide to me bc i Still meet christians who cant even hear about gay people without talking#about how sad gayness is and how gay souls are in danger and the last time i ever visited a church the sermon was homophobic#yet the city decorates for pride every year and even certain churches will decorate for it#the culture is certainly changing lolol but as long as there are ''gay love is sodomy'' christians around here#then its always going to be a struggle for lgb youth bc they are straight up hostile
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also i Did find a triple layer to be feral about
#a different Lovely than i was talking abt earlier. Billie Eilish & Khalid's Lovely#ouuughghg. Oh Dude.#first of all i've been sleeping on using billie music for marrow stuff. heard Bury A Friend earlier and it was Oof but this. This#the repetition. the melody chasing itself. the way you barely get a moment's breath#before the ''i hope some day / i'll make it out of here'' comes back in#also. ''even if it takes all night / or a hundred years.'' screaming crying flipping a table. eating my phone#and the way it ends on the one quiet lonely layer of them both saying ''welcome home.''#insert stickman gore image here#nebular.txt
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"Pohatu."
The voice echoed like a knife hissing as it scratches marble. The prisoner (the only one, completely isolated from the rest of the city), huddled in a nook, shivered a little further away into the corner he'd tucked himself into and held onto himself a little tighter.
He did not respond to his own name.
Deliberate steps moved closer: clack. Clack. Clack. Clack. Their rhythm was slow, cold; they accompanied a scrutinizing stare.
They stopped before the cell.
The air felt freezing.
"Pohatu."
The prisoner did not answer.
"You are not stupid. That I know."
The chilling voice was soft. It spoke lowly, taking the time to properly enunciate each and every word perfectly.
"I am certain you know what I am here for."
Once more, only silence replied.
"I would advise you do not make this harder than it already is."
He watched as the prisoner's knuckles shook while tightening around his own trembling shoulders, as though trying to hide his weakness.
"Collaborate. For your own sake."
A sob tore through the room.
Another.
Another.
Another.
"Please," the prisoner finally babbled, voice hoarse from disuse.
Broken.
It was his turn to be faced with the silent treatment. Not a word reached him as he cried inconsolably, naked face pressed against his arms, for what seemed like hours.
His brother stared on, unmoving, expressionless, until the wailing died down and the body slumped on itself from the release of pent up emotions.
"I take it you have returned to your senses."
A crooked whine.
"I do not believe I understood that."
A confused mumbling.
"Speak clearly."
"Yes!" his brother sobbed.
His orange eyes looked into blue ones pleadingly, begging for help, for forgiveness. He watched them furrow, watched clouds of condensation pour from the sides of the white mask.
"You are guilty of a terrible crime."
"Yes."
"You are aware of your misconduct."
"Yes."
"You are aware that I cannot call you brother."
A pained wince: "Yes."
Another long moment of quiet passed.
The prisoner had shifted his gaze onto the floor.
The Toa watched him, fists clenched as tight as he could.
"Are you sure your forgiveness is deserved?"
The body shook from another hysterical sob, as though it had just been struck by a lash: he inhaled sharply a few times, but could not bring himself to speak.
"Answer me."
There was another attempt. Again, nothing came of it.
"Pohatu."
"Please..."
He stared.
He stared at the pitiful thing so powerless and miserable, completely alone, curled on itself on the floor as it shuddered.
"Please..."
He stared at the pitiful thing speaking in a voice that crumbled upon itself like gravel rolling uselessly down the side of a mountain.
"Please, I... Please..."
For a long stretch of time, nothing happened.
Then the door to the cell unlocked.
Pohatu dared to look up: Kopaka stood over him, unflinching, unreadable, hands balled up in fists hard enough to crush boulders between his fingers, looking down with his glimmering blue eyes as the air around him crackled with frost.
He could have so easily torn him apart right now.
Only the two of them, here, in the dark, far away from any other form of life who could have heard any commotion or cared enough to investigate.
Nobody would have even known. Not until it was too late.
Kopaka kneeled before the former Toa and pulled him into a tight embrace, one hand cradling his nape while the other pressed hard on his back to squeeze him closer to himself.
He allowed himself a sigh in relief only when he felt the other's arms wrap around him, his face against the crook of his neck.
Pohatu held him by the waist tight.
"I missed you," he sobbed.
I missed you too, Kopaka could not say despite how desperately he needed to.
He tightened his grip.
Then the pain came.
Blinding and sudden, cruel, immense, so profoundly unexpected that all he could do was choke on his own breath.
His torso fell backwards, bending much farther that it should have. His heartlight pulsed erratically as he heaved, adrenaline rushing through him and locking his every muscle in place. His legs were slumped, completely unresponsive like the rest of his lower body; all that was keeping his entire form from crashing on the pavement like a broken doll were the kind, solid, dependable arms of his brother.
A hand wriggled in the now empty space where it had shattered his spine in a morbidly playful way.
He was laid down gently, all things considered.
His eyes only stared at his butcher wide and thoughtless like those of a helpless Rahi before a much faster predator.
Pohatu smiled down at him sweetly, exactly like he always did.
"I missed your soft spot for me."
He tore his hand out of his brother's spine with a ghastly crackle, not even flinching, to wrap it around his throat. He yanked: Kopaka coughed out an anguished wheeze as a chunk of his neck was thrown out, clattering a few bio across the floor.
Pohatu pressed his thumb between the Toa of Ice's face and his mask, applying just about the slightest leverage possible to part the two. It seemed to take ages, for the 'pop' of a dislodged Kanohi to echo through the silence of Kopaka's frantic breathing; but even with all that time for a counterattack at his disposal, he did not manage to raise even a single finger against the other. He only stared, fearful, shocked, in denial.
His brother laughed in the same way he always laughed - a gentle, booming sound, friendly and pleasant, that warmed one's heart.
"You couldn't hurt me if you wanted to with all your being," he mocked him, making the sneering words seem like yet another lighthearted joke as he twirled the Akaku between his fingers: "And isn't that why Tahu and Photok are dead?"
He looked onto the other's face. He'd seen it so few times - after being overwhelmed by the Piraka on Voya Nui, for example.
He remembered it had been awfully surreal, to see it; almost frightening, but familiar somehow.
It stirred nothing in him now.
How lovely.
Pohatu leaned closer to it, until he could feel the shaky breaths from Kopaka's mouth curl around him. They were barely fresh.
"A shame, eh?"
Blue eyes stared at him, horrified.
What a beautiful thing to see.
"That you couldn't save me after all."
He laughed his usual jovial laugh again as he stood up, joints cracking a bit while he stretched. The Akaku clicked onto him in a perfect fit.
How nice of him: pure unwarranted trust, forgiveness, an open door, a hug, and now even a fairly useful Kanohi to replace the one he'd been stripped of lest he use its powers to break himself out of containment. Truly, he was almost starting to feel spoiled.
Kopaka squirmed between his feet. Was he trying to get away?
He couldn't help but giggle.
"There's your only flaws: you're too smart for a leech to bite you."
Pohatu gifted him the sweetest of his smiles.
"And you love your siblings too much."
The air shattered beneath his foot with a sickening crunch.
Pohatu didn't even spare a glance at his brother as he walked away from his corpse, face crushed to bits making an absolute mess on the cold unfeeling pavement, body twitching before the rigor mortis settled in fully; the Toa of Shadow hummed a mindless, cruel song, something right out of a Makuta's repertoire, as he he made his way into the halls of Metru Nui's colosseum in search of whoever else in this enormous playground would have the honorable misfortune to be his second victim of the day.
#bionicle#pohatu#kopaka#gore tw#violence tw#death tw#random writing#HI HELLO HELLO. WELCOME TO MY SPECIAL CORNER OF HELL#listen to me now. if pohatu turned villanous he would be Near Unstoppable#its one thing having to fight a brother turned evil and its one thing having to fight Pohatu. Everybody's Friend. turned evil#hes already strong af AND he has the advantage of being aware of the above so he can use it to essentially do some psychological warfare#youd never hurt him right? if he smiles like he always does and cries and asks for a second chance? you wouldnt doubt hes sincere... right?#ESPECIALLY THAT EMOTIONAL IF CONSTIPATED IDIOT THAT IS KOPAKA.#pohatu KNOWS where hes weakest (heart) and WILL use that to absolutely fucking demolish him#and kopaka is too attached to him NOT to fall for a heartstring pulling ploy like this little show#hes desperately telling himself he can Fix Him while walking directly in the jaws of the alligator and when he cant he shuts down in denial#i hope this pulls a genuine twist. i was going for a 'you thought this was the tuyet empire AU but here comes a WALLOP' kinda deal#i have no clue abt the logistics of this au btw i was just possessed by the thought of how horrifying an evil pohatu could be
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Idk if you saw or not but a new chapter of the fury of a shattered mirror dropped last night! I haven’t read it yet but I thought I should let you know 😎👍
awughgh HELL YEAH!! ive been away from my laptop for a while so i didnt see, thank you birdy!! :] this is the best news ive had all day hkjgh <33 excited very excited going to read it now <33
#volta transmissions#SKILLS ARE BACK BABEYYYYYYY!! ehehehehe :] oh i LOVE seeing them come back from just ''??????'' SMILES REALLY HAPPILY#welcome back to the world little ones... oh im so happy to see them... :'] ''You do you softie'' EHEHE... skills interactions :D! yay!!!!!#okay i'll add more liveblogging in the tags as i go probably hkjhg <33 i appreciate you very much birdy <33#''the avant-garde prick is just making shit up again'' HAKJDHKJ... ''You did us proud holding out til the end'' WAH... ENDURANCE... ;O;#WELCOME BACK ENCY SMILES!!! no motorics skills yet though thats to be expected hkjh <3 ency ''you have the facts'' and#empathy ''and the emotions'' HKJGH IS THAT A FACTSFEELINGS SKILLSPOSTING REFERENCE /J lots of voli talking!!! very happy about this <3#VOLITION - ''if we had the logician here...'' ''...'' ''damnit i thought that would work'' HAHAJKSHDSKJH SMILES. HA.#''Punch something. maybe Coach will show up'' HHFKJH... oh my god this makes me so happy... cmon we gotta get the gang back together...#half light!! hello!! my darling!! LETS GO!! ough buT NOT ENOUGH TO GET ARMS BACK NOOUIGHJ MOTORICS WHERE ARE YOU LITTLE BUDDIES???#''try to get eyes back online'' ''come on come on--'' OUGH I LOVE... i love how theyre all supporting each other as they come back online..#TEAMWORK!! CMON LETS GET EVERYONE BACK!! YEAH BOI WE GOT A MOTORICS BACK UP!! HELLO PERCEP! calm down! you need composure in here!!#THE JOYWIRE... OUGH STOP STOP IM SO FOND... VOLI CMON. nooo ourgh takes damage... ''You were really gonna cut me out?'' AWAH... WAHHH!!!!!#ow my heart my HEART. chemi baby my little darling... hugging him kissing his forehead... THERES OUR LOGICIAN HELLO DARLING!!#hkjh trying to cue in interfacing DAMN :'] good metaphor anyway concept it was very well laid. voli keeping track of each of them too hehe#HI DRAMA YAYY! platonic love story! friends!!! ''Neuroplasticity's off the charts.'' ''I'm surprised you know a word that long that isn't-#'''amphetamines''' ''Dextromethorphan asshole'' HAJKSH YOU FUCKING TELL 'EM! YOU'RE NOT E-CHEMISTRY FOR NOTHING!!!#again with trying to get Phys back in hkjhg INLANDDD SMILES HI THERE DREAMER!! Logic just like ''yeah. i hate it here.'' ''have you tried?'#okay this is the 20th tag. hopefully a reblog will be enough to finish out my thoughts but god knows i have so much to say hjhg#esprit: Birdy
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edward i care so much abt people ive only killed rapists and murderers and im tortured by the idea of damning bella’s soul even tho i turned her regardless but im gonna try to kill myself by exposing myself in front of a crowd of people who will then also be killed bc they saw me and im doing all this bc i think my ex killed herself as a direct result of me LEAVING HER IN THE FUCKING WOODS TO ROT all while knowing we just killed a mated vampire and they’re notoriously vengeful cullen.
mr. i treat this girl like shit and like she’s a little baby and like she’s my play toy all at the same time but i get to be the one to swoop in and say all the textbook gaslighting and manipulation and narcissistic terms u could ever think of to make myself look better bc her other bf fights dirty for her bc unlike me who just says he cares abt her soul and eternal damnation and living a full human life he actually cares abt all that shit and also knows that she’s mostly into me bc i’m like a drug to her bc im an apex predator whose sole reason for existing is to lure people in to EAT THEM and im addicted to her bc the smell of her BLOOD.
#like seriously him ‘being the bigger person’ and saying thank you??? to jacob??? at the end of new moon????#god they should’ve let him off himself#and also it comes across as oh thanks for babysitting her for me while i was gone here’s $20#and then he’s sitting there like oh werewolves are dangerous bella!#like he didn’t leave her there knowing jacob her best friend could possibly be a werewolf bc he’s quileute. like actually#and if he didn’t think of that he’s just so fucking stupid i mean he literally has 24 hours in a day#to just think. like ur so dumb#werewolves are so dangerous bella but welcome back to my family who all almost ate u btw#they’re so dangerous but it takes everything in me not to eat u every time we’re together#WEREWOLVES. WHOSE WHOLE PURPOSE FOR BEING SHAPESHIFTERS IS TO PROTECT HUMANS
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