#Weiss stealing Jaune's razors

[zexapher]

Vanity of Vanities; All is Vanity

This meme was brazenly stolen from inspired by a post from u/The-Goofball and the subsequent comment by u/Akumu_Oukoku which may be found here. I’d like to especially thank Akumu Oukoku for allowing me to use their dialogue most thoroughly.

Everyone likes a good Jaune should keep his beard joke, amiright? I had to get you all a little holiday present after all. But like, I made a whole storyboard for this one! 12 separate panels, it’s a real comic even! Put a ton of editing into it. Always got to go above and beyond for White Knight, love ���em. Listening to .hack music helped me power through the grind!

Panel 7, 8, and 10 were a lot of work in particular. Cutting Oscar out of the scene, and especially color correcting Weiss took a lot longer than expected. Pretty much had to redraw her entirely in those later panels. That comes with the territory of having chosen character stills from the Haven fight, but we deserve the extra effort. Speaking of, I got to say there’s something poetic about taking the most traumatic event for a Weiss fan and turning it into the most traumatic event for a White Rose fan (I’m sorry, guys. Just kidding around).

As someone that doesn’t know what they’re doing, this was a lot of work figuring out what tools I needed and how to use them on photoshop. My photoshop expiring 2/3 of the way through and making me switch over to gimp and learn it all over again with a new software compounded all those difficulties, which is why we might see a few corners being cut once we hit panel 9.

I hope you all enjoy; I had great fun making it!

[madman479r]

At Shade Academy after RWBYJ returned from the Ever After. Ren, Nora, Oscar and Emerald shared a room.

Jaune: **From inside the bathroom** Oh, you gotta be kidding me!

Jaune: **Throws open door and glares at ORNE** Okay, someone better fess up!

Ren: What's the matter, Jaune?

Jaune: I'll tell ya what's wrong! Everytime I buy a razor they disappear even before I use it! So someone is stealing them from me!

JRNO: **Look at Emerald

Emerald:... wow, seriously? I stopped doing that since I joined you goody-two-shoes.

Oscar: **turns to Jaune** why do you believe someone is stealing them?

Jaune: Because I doubt I'm misplacing them and anyone but Oscar could have a motive.

Emerald: Wait, why is Oscar not a suspect?

Jaune: Because why would he need a razor? He's still baby face. He's as smooth as a baby's butt.

Oscar: Hey! I'm getting some hair on my upper lip.

Nora: Yeah, even girls have tiny hairs on their face, Oscar. You ain't foolin' anyone.

Oscar: **Grumbles.**

Ren: So why do you suspect us?

Jaune: Simple, Ren could be using the razors to shave.

Ren: Why wouldn't I just buy my own?

Jaune: Because then you'd reveal to Nora that you can in fact grown facial hair and she wouldn't let you shave, thus growing a beard. And in self preservation of your pelvis, you secretly shave because if Nora saw you with a beard, she would ride you like a wild Usra until you died of dehydration.

Jaune: Nora and Emerald could use my razors to shave leg hair, Nora because she thinks it's okay to use without asking permission and Emerald because she thinks it's free real estate.

Emerald: This is crazy. Just keep better track of your shit. **Leaves room**

**Later**

Emerald: **Walks into random dark alley.** You here?

Voice from shadows: Were you followed?

Emerald: pfft, you know who you're talking to?

Voice: Good. **Person emerges from shadows, revealing Weiss**

Weiss: did you find them?

Emerald: depends? You find the money?

Weiss: **hands over lien cards**

Emerald: **hands over razors** I don't get why you're doing this.

Weiss: **chucks razors in nearby dumpster.** if you saw what I saw, you'd be doing this for free.

Emerald: whatever. Bee-tee-dubs, he's getting suspicious.

Weiss: I'll worry about that.

Emerald: **shrugs and leaves**

Weiss: **imaging older Jaune's beard, running her hands across it. Feeling it brush against her neck as Jaune kisses and sucks on her neck. Straddling his face as she rides that bearded face like a horse, feeling his tongue deep in her puss-**

Weiss: **shakes head** soon~.

[thatorigamiguy]

Jaune stepped in front of Weiss with his arms crossed and a stern visage on his face. Which was currently filling out with rough and irritating patches of stubble, made worse with the Vacuo heat.

Jaune: "Weiss. this needs to stop. I know you're still stealing my razors'."

Instead of reeling at the accusation, Weiss addressed Jaune with a cool gaze.

Weiss: "Mmm? I have no idea what you're talking about Jaune. I've not been near any of your personal belongings as per the "restraining order" you issued to me."

Jaune internally winced, though he managed to keep a stern exterior. Leave it to him to have not bothered to double check for grammar and other inaccuracies. Either he's lost his touch, or the forgers in Vacuo really have lower standards than Vale.

Jaune: "I know you haven't, that's why you've been having Ruby steal them for you."

Weiss quirked a brow, before turning away from Jaune.

Weiss: "Ruby, could you come here for a moment?"

A quick petal burst, and Ruby had appeared before her teammate with a bright smile.

Ruby: "Yes Weiss?"

Weiss: "Have I asked you to steal Jaune's razors in the past two weeks?"

Ruby thought about it for a moment, before shaking her head in the negative.

Ruby: "Nope, can't say you have Weiss. I haven't been anywhere near Jaune's stuff since we got back from the Ever After."

Weiss thanked her teammate, before turning to give Jaune a serene smile. But Jaune wasn't fooled, shooting the two of them a deadpan look before uncrossing his arms and opening up his right hand.

Jaune: "Really? Then uh, what's this exactly?"

In the palm of his hands were petals. Rose petals to be exact.

Jaune: "Now, I know that desert roses are a thing, but last I checked? They look nothing like normal rose petals."

But neither Ruby nor Weiss reacted at the accusation, instead staring blankly at the rose petals before staring back at Jaune.

Weiss: "That doesn't mean anything Jaune. In fact, you could have just bought those from a local store here and are using them as falsified evidence to make claimless accusation."

Ruby: "Yeah Jaune, it's not very nice to try and use me as a scapegoat for your missing razors. Besides, I'd never willingly steal anything of yours, especially just because Weiss asked me-"

Jaune: "I'll buy you two bakers dozen of the cookies from that bakery you keep drooling over whenever we head into town if you tell me the truth."

Ruby: "-Is what I would have said, if it wasn't for the fact that yes, Weiss DID in fact ask me to steal them for you, and I want two dozen of the triple chocolate chips and those awesome smores cookies. And oh, throw in half a dozen churros!"

Ruby was drooling as she made her demands, only to wince at the steel melting glare that Weiss shot her.

Weiss: "YOU SOLD ME OUT OVER FUCKING COOKIES?!"

Ruby could only offer a Weiss a meek smile, a nervous laugh bubbling past her lips as she did everything she could to avoid Weiss's furious gaze.

Ruby: "Heh, it uh... slipped out?"

Jaune didn't even bother hiding the smug smile on his face at how easily Ruby crumbled at the mention of her favorite sweets. Weiss may have the making of a professional businesswomen, but Jaune had the benefit of growing up with seven sisters and that made you get all kinds of crafty when getting people to do what you want.

Jaune: "It's a deal Ruby, I'll buy you both the cookies and churros for you when we head into town. As for you Weiss."

Weiss winced, caught in the act red handed and figured she was going to get a dressing down only for Jaune to put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Jaune: "Listen. I know you like the beard and I'm flattered that you think I look handsome with it. Helps out a lot in the self-confidence department."

Jaune said with a smile, before giving Weiss a stern frown.

Jaune: "But having a beard in this environment is a huge pain Weiss. It gets hot under all of that hair and dries it all out. It makes my skin red and irritated and I have to do everything I can not to itch at it. Not to mention, the sand always managed to get in it and make everything worse. Were it anywhere else Weiss, I'd happily grow it out for you but now is not the time."

Weiss went to speak, only to get cut off when Jaune shot her another deadpan look.

Jaune: "And no: using the other men who grew up here with beards does not count as an excuse because they're all accustomed to living with them in this environment. Listen Weiss, when this is all said and done, I'll grow my beard out as long as you want and never touch a razor again in my life aside from the occasional trimming. Until then, can you please, PLEASE, stop stealing my razors?"

Weiss said nothing for a moment, stewing in her thoughts as she thought over Jaune's pleadings before crossing her arms in a huff as she looked away from him.

Weiss: "...Fine, I'll stop stealing your razors."

Jaune: "...And?"

Weiss winced, before reluctantly grumbling out between grit teeth.

Weiss: "...And I won't have other people steal them for me either."

Jaune let out a relieve sigh, before giving Weiss a grateful smile. But before he could thank her for seeing reason, she turned to him with an accusing finger.

Weiss: "But I'm holding you to your word Jaune! Once this is all over, if you so much as even glance in the direction of a razor I'll make you regret it!"

Jaune chuckled at the threat, before he found himself patting Weiss on the head with a warm smile.

Jaune: "I swear upon the Arc Family name that I won't. And we Arcs-"

Weiss: "-Always keep your word, yes I know. Now cut that out!"

Weiss said she slapped his hand away, a furious blush spreading across her pale skin. Jaune only chuckled again, before he departed out of their room, leaving Weiss and Ruby alone together. Despite the blush, Weiss could only breath out a wistful sigh as her gaze lingered on the door while Ruby had a pout on her face.

Ruby: "...It's just a stupid beard, I think he looks better clean shaven."

Weiss: "Silence traitor! He looks dashing with a beard and you know he does!"

Weiss sniffed, before placing her hand on her chest and she developed a smug aura.

Weiss: "Besides, you're just jealous that he both gave me a promise AND headpats."

Ruby: "SHUT UP NO I'M NOT AND YOU CAN'T PROVE IT, RAZOR THEIF!"

Weiss: "BETTER TO BE A THIEF THAN A BACKSTABBER!"

The two girls glared harshly at each other drawing the attention of a passing Yang. She only shook her head at the display, before mumbling something about the two of them just "jumping his bones already."

stupid thought what if jaune gave Weiss a fake yet realistic restraining order

I feel like Weiss would have an eye for detail with contracts, legal documents, and all kinds of business paperwork, so if it does work, it won't for very long.

Plus, you have to consider that Jaune would have to explain it, and I don't think he's quite savvy with verbatum rehearsal.

"This says you have to stay at least fifty feet away from me!" Jaune declared.

"No," Weiss corrected, "this says I have to stay fifteen 'fett' away for you."

Also, this begs the question why Jaune would want to put a straining order against Weiss.

[godofsexdrugsandrocknroll]

Streaming, Flaxen, Waxen; or Yang and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Jaune: *Storming in* Okay, it was kinda funny when you started hiding my scissors, Yang, but you gotta stop.

Yang: *Who had been eating her lunch, talking with Blake* Okay, what?

Jaune: My razors, Yang. Stop stealing them already.

Yang: *Genuinely baffled* Don’t know what’s crawled up your ass, Jaune, but I haven’t touched your razors. Or your scissors.

Jaune: Oh sure and I just happened to wanna grow my hair out.

*Sure enough Jaune’s blonde hair now reaches past his shoulders in a half up, half down style*

Blake: *Swirling a glass of water, eying Jaune* I think it looks nice.

Jaune: *High pitched* i tHinK iT loOkS nICe.

Yang: Hey, watch it. She’s being serious. It’s a good look--

Jaune: Fine, whatever, but the beard!? C’mon, stop playing games.

*Jaune also has a pale, almost metallic blonde beard that’s gotten pretty long - to the point where he needs a beard comb*

Yang: And I’m telling you *blows a raspberry, covers her mouth*

Jaune: *Opens mouth, closes it* Okay, not gonna lie. That kind of dismissal actually stings, Yang.

Blake: *Smiling behind her glass* Jaune. *Nods to the wall behind him*

Ruby: *Blushing*

Weiss: *Wide eyed*

Jaune: *Gears slowly start working*

Jaune: *Realization dawns, gasp overdramatically* IT WAS YOU TWO!

Yang: *Bursts out laughing*

Blake: *Giggles*

Jaune: *Gazing brokenly into the distance* Betrayed by my own girlfriends. Oh, I can totally understand why every singer ever has written about heartbreak now.

Weiss: *Eyes are still fidgeting, not looking  at him directly and her cheeks have pinked* Oh stop. I-it’s just...*awkward pause* well it was Ruby’s idea so she should explain it!

Ruby: *Blushes harder and ignores Yang’s cackling* What!? Weiss you traitor! *Weiss refuses to look at her, clasping her hands* Well, uh, Jaune, i-it’s...ah, I know! How about me, you and Weiss go to the bedroom and I’ll fuck Weiss’ face on your dick while you eat me out!

Weiss: *Immediately goes bright crimson, shrieks* RUBY ROSE!

Blake: *Silently shaking from laughter*

Yang: *Freezes, lurches forward a bit* Oh. Well this is a new kind of pain.

*Weiss is slapping at a squealing Ruby, face burning and trying to get past the taller girls defenses*

Ruby: *Defending herself and peeking at Jaune from between her arms* H-howza ‘bout it!? Ow, Weiss, I’m sorry! Ow!

Jaune: *Crosses arms, gives disappointed stare*

Ruby: ACK! Not that look! OW WEISS, MY EYE! *To Jaune, hand over her eye* I only like that look when it’s cause I couldn’t hold my breath long enough or cause I came before Weiss *mutters* again. *Weiss slaps her on the top of the head* Ow, my soft spot!

Weiss: *Her neck is now red too as she finally, grumpily, crosses her own arms* Your entire head’s a soft spot.

Blake: *Has her face on the table to hide her tearful eyes, her body shaking*

Yang: *Clutches her heart* What happened to my sweet little baby sister who wanted me to braid her hair and brought me cookies and her stuffie when I was sad?

Ruby: *Defeated* Fine. I hope you know just what you were turning down--

Yang: *Crisis intensifies*

Ruby: --but if you have to know, it’s c-cause, well, *quickly* you look super hot with long hair.

Yang: *Distressed* She can shatter my entire world without blinking an eye but that’s what’s got her bashful!?

Jaune: *Blinks* Uh, thanks?

Ruby: *Blushing, looks away bashfully* Really hot. *Nudges Weiss*

Weiss: *Won’t look him in the eye* No matter how you wear it. Right now? You kinda look like a viking and i-it’s...yummy. *Ruby nods agreeing* Ponytail?

Ruby: Somewhere between starving, sexy artist and casual Jaune, which is just as sexy if not more.

Weiss: And g-gods help either one of us if you let it down because I don’t think you understand how good you look with a breeze running through your hair, just l-looking over the horizon.

Ruby: Even if you’re just thinking about what you’re gonna eat later. Trust me. It works. *Eyes glaze over* It’s like someone took hot guy and heroic knight and wrapped them all into one and *whistles and Yang flinches at it*

Weiss: T-the point is it looks good. Very good.

Jaune: *Shocked, very flattered and blushing* Oh. I had no idea. And my beard?

Weiss: *Face wobbles and she squeals, putting her hands over her face*

Ruby: Uh, that’s Weiss for she likes the way it feels. *Carefully puts an arm up, eying her girlfriend cautiously* Especially when you’re going down on her or she parks it right on you.

Weiss: *Screams into her hands, kicks Ruby in the shin and turns away* R-Ruuuubyyyy!!!!!! These things are supposed to be private! B-between lovers!

Yang: *Looking harrowed* Finally someone speaking sense in this broken, twisted world.

Ruby: Please, Yang knows I do stuff. She’s fine.

Yang: *Gapes, swallows* I think I understand how Dad felt when I started dating now.

Ruby: *Shrugs at Jaune* And I kinda love that too. Plus, just...mmmm.

Jaune: *Rubs his neck, looking away* ‘Mmm’?

Weiss: *Muffled* Yes. Beards suit you. Y-you’re handsome no matter what, but the p-pervert’s not wrong to suggest that this new look is very attractive.

Jaune: *Genuinely bashful* Oh. Then I guess it’s not so bad. But why didn’t you just say something-- *Looks at Weiss hiding while Ruby won’t stop cutely fidgeting* --aaannnddd nevermind. Got it.

*They all awkwardly stand there for a few minutes before Jaune nods, looks to Yang*

Jaune: Sorry for accusing you guys, I just figured this had practical joke written all over it.

Yang: *Weakly* N-no problem, Jaune.

Ruby: *Nods in the background* Okay, you got us both all worked up again - OW! My butt! I’m gonna make you kiss it better, Wei-OW-OW-OW! I’m sorry! *Focuses on Jaune, rubbing her recently slapped bottom* Jaune. Bedroom.

Jaune: *Immediately distracted* Well I guess if I’m having that much of an effect *trails off before smirking* but I think I know two girls who are in clear need of spankings. Faces down and asses up, you naughty girls.

Ruby: *Whispers* Oh gods we gave him confidence. *Shivers, salutes* Yes sir! *Scampers off*

Weiss: *Staring wide eyed, blush acting back up and she swallows, speaks quietly* You’re not the boss of me.

Jaune: *Smirks, walking forward* Oh? *Chases after Weiss who shrieks, spins and runs after Ruby, following her with his head held surprisingly high*

Blake: *Breathing heavily, hiccuping while wiping away mirthful tears* Oh my goodness. Those three are something else.

Yang: *Thousand yard stare* I want to die and never see the light of day again.

Blake: Oh please.

Yang: My poor, innocent baby sister! *Trying not to cry as Blake rolls her eyes, grabbing Yang’s arm to lead her outside and away from the house*

[deep-aura-reserve]

Five of those training headcanons (if you're still accepting)

Yeah, I should probably put when I am or am not accepting Meme’s but, I am still accepting for now.

1. So, an easy one for me is that, after a certain point Jaune did start to look at his Training with Pyrrha as Dates, even if they could be especially brutal, because it was such a extensive and meaningful time for him.

2. So this is one I am slightly stealing from a friend of mine, because I love the idea of this headcanon. The Videos that Jaune trained with after Pyrrha’s passing were not on his phone, but hers. Having recovered it and found the videos. Which she had made when she knew that she was in line to be a maiden.

3. He trains with Nora when he feels like he needs to work on raw power, he Trains with Ren for when he needs technique, Ruby for Accuracy, Yang for placing his strikes (Given her semblance), Blake for sussing out where to properly strike against a trickier opponent. and Weiss for someone with many tools at their disposal.

4. His stamina due to his Aura reserve is positively insane when it is simply training and not a full fledged fight where he’d have to burn it for other reasons. Being able to keep up for hours without inherently getting tired, but isn’t boastful about it, and will sometimes not realize it.

5. His favorite person to train with, which he will never admit, for fear of hurting other feelings. Is Ruby. Beyond being a spectacular sparring partner that keep Jaune’s Edge razor sharp, her optimism is something he does need the occasional refresher for as life is turning out so drastically different than what he thought it would.

[howlingday]

because since weiss came back she hasn't stopped stealing his razors and other things that allow him to shave his beautiful face, (she even stole crosea mors once when jaune complained that at this rate he would have to shave using the ancestral blade (( which is technically tradition but shhh...)) ).

Oho... And the plot thickens...

stupid thought what if jaune gave Weiss a fake yet realistic restraining order

I feel like Weiss would have an eye for detail with contracts, legal documents, and all kinds of business paperwork, so if it does work, it won't for very long.

Plus, you have to consider that Jaune would have to explain it, and I don't think he's quite savvy with verbatum rehearsal.

"This says you have to stay at least fifty feet away from me!" Jaune declared.

"No," Weiss corrected, "this says I have to stay fifteen 'fett' away for you."

Also, this begs the question why Jaune would want to put a straining order against Weiss.