#We will never forget you Christina

[padfootagain]

Love in Verses (XLVI)

Chapter 46 : ‘Both of us, of the love which makes us one.’

Hi! Here is a new chapter! A little academic update for our lovely couple…

I hope you like this chapter! Tell me what you think!

****

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader (professor!AU)

Warnings: slow burn, angst, hurt, hurt/comfort, tooth-rotting fluff in later chapters, some scenes in later chapters will have heavy sexual themes even if it’s not explicit nsfw description, so no minors here

Summary: Your life seems perfect. You're engaged, your career is thriving as you become an assistant professor at Trinity College, and this Andrew Hozier-Byrne you're sharing an office with seems to be a nice guy you hope to call a friend soon. Life seems to be smiling at you... until everything goes sour. When your fiancé breaks up with you, your perfect world shatters. And when your colleague also gets his heart broken soon after, your shared office seems to be a curse rather than a blessing. But Andrew seems determined to mend your broken hearts... Will things finally go according to plan?

Word Count: 3479

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s masterlist – Main masterlist

I loved you first: but afterwards your love Outsoaring mine, sang such a loftier song As drowned the friendly cooings of my dove. Which owes the other most? my love was long, And yours one moment seemed to wax more strong; I loved and guessed at you, you construed me And loved me for what might or might not be – Nay, weights and measures do us both a wrong. For verily love knows not ‘mine’ or ‘thine;’ With separate ‘I’ and ‘thou’ free love has done, For one is both and both are one in love: Rich love knows nought of ‘thine that is not mine;’ Both have the strength and both the length thereof, Both of us, of the love which makes us one.

Christina Rossetti

The whatsapp group of the third-year students was busier than ever.

Texts after texts after texts were filling up the app, the screen constantly updated, a message chasing another.

The reason was simple. Professor Hozier-Byrne and Professor Y/L/N had been spotted chatting in a corridor… and they were standing very close to each other…

Were they touching?!?!

Nah… but they were leaning towards each other, it was adorable.

And Prof H-B was blushing. BLUSHING! And they were laughing like… I had never seen any of them so happy.

They’re definitely together. THE LOOK IN THEIR EYES LADS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A string of heart-eyes emojis followed.

I’m betting on them.

So… does that mean that our two fav literature professors are also IN LOVE?! My heart!!

Oh

My

God…

Do you think Pr. H-B’s poetry is about… HER?!

OMG!!!

A string of messages taking God as a witness of the student’s amazement followed.

We need to find out. We need to be certain!

And that was how Operation Love Birds began…

“Do you have any questions about this poem?” Andrew asked his students, readjusting his glasses, closing his copy of District and Circle.

Silence, but his students were clearly listening carefully to him, as several of them shook their heads.

“Alright, then… I reckon that’s all for today. Don’t forget that you have an essay to prepare for next week! Enjoy your weekend!”

He was already packing his things, thinking about you and the coffee break you had promised after this class. He knew you were wearing this shirt he loved on you, that green one that made his heart stumble and lose all kind of rhythm. He had seen you leaving your shared home wearing it, but you had a class early in the morning, while he could take his time. He remembered the way it revealed just enough of your cleavage to drive him nuts, though…

He was almost startled by the four students standing in front of him. Marie, Sheily, Saoirse and Sean. He knew them quite well by now, and so did you. They had steadily attended his and your classes every semester since their first year.

He quickly recovered and offered them a kind and expectant smile.

“We wanted to ask you about the essay for next week. We haven’t found many sources about the poem we’re studying, and we’re not quite sure about our interpretation… could you tell us if we’re going in the wrong direction?”

His smile only grew a little wider, and he wondered why one of the girls was repeatedly blinking when he pushed his hair behind his ear.

“Yes, of course. I know that some authors we’re working on in this class, being contemporary to us, don’t have that many academic resources about their work. I’ll give you a push, if you need.”

He tapped on the screen of his phone to check the time.

“I have to run now, but come by tomorrow afternoon to my office if you’d like. We’ll take a look at what you’ve been doing, and I’ll give you directions to finish your essay.”

“Thank you! Have a nice day, professor!”

“Thanks, have a good one too.”

Andrew let out a relieved exhale as the students left, and hurried to pack once more. His phone vibrated with your name colouring his screen.

Got your coffee, waiting in our office.

Hurry up. I want a kiiiiiiissssss!

Love you! xx

Andrew grinned without even noticing, throwing his pencil case in his bag and running to the door. The few students who were still in the room looked at him with raised eyebrows, and exchanged questioning glances at the sight of his sudden hurry. He who was always so calm, so composed, almost shy…

Andrew ignored them, though. He didn’t even notice that they were there at all. Instead, he rushed through the corridors of the old university, until he had reached your shared office.

He opened the door more violently than he meant to, making you jump. You were standing there, by the window behind his desk, a coffee in your hand. You were wearing that top, alright…

He hurried to close the door, rushed across the room, bending to avoid the lamp hanging from the ceiling, and dropped his bag next to his desk.

“Your coffee’s…” you started, pointing at the warm mug on his desk, but you stopped when he took your warm beverage from your hands to put it down on a nearby shelf. “Huh… that was mine!”

Instead of answering, Andrew merely stared at you, letting his gaze rake the length of your body, and he didn’t try to hide the hunger in his eyes.

“You’re wearing that top.”

You raised an eyebrow, the ghost of a smug smile tugging at your lips.

“Yes…”

“You know I love that shirt on you.”

“Hmmm… yes, I kind of do. That’s why I chose it this morning.”

“Oh, I see… you woke up and thought ‘hey, how can I torture my boyfriend today?’…”

“Torture?”

“You clearly chose violence with that cleavage, honey…”

You bit on your lower lip, unable to refrain your grin any longer.

“Did I now? And I thought I would make you happy…”

“Oh, I’m delighted, don’t get me wrong.”

You wanted to add some banter, but his hands came up to rest on your cheeks, cradling your face to pull you closer while he bent down to kiss you, and you were left too breathless to speak.

“You’re so beautiful, my love. Absolutely gorgeous…” he whispered, his lips a breath away from yours, and despite the obvious desire in his words, his tone was infinitely tender. Adoring, even. “How did I get lucky enough for you to want me, huh?”

You giggled at that, the most adorable sound in the world, and he didn’t even notice that he was smiling.

“You planned a devilish plan to get back with your ex with me.”

“Our exes,” he corrected you.

“Hmm… yeah, that’s how.”

He shook his head, brushing his nose against yours in the process.

“I don’t think that’s how I did it…”

“No… You just had to be your kind, funny, handsome self…”

He rolled his eyes, and when you opened your mouth to protest, he merely closed the gap between your mouths, finally kissing you.

He was breathless by the time you pulled away, dizzy and happier than ever…

… how could you still make him feel this way after two full years?

You wrapped your arms around his neck to keep him close, and he held your waist firmly against him, partly to keep you close but also to help you keep your balance as you had risen to your tiptoes so he wouldn’t have to bend so much.

“Well, professor… if you’re nice enough with me today… I might let you take this shirt you like so much off me tonight…” you whispered in the most tempting voice, making him groan.

“You’ll be the death of me…”

While Andrew and you were finally breaking your embrace, sipping on your coffees while imagining very graphic scenarios of how you would spend your evening together, the whatsapp group of your students, now rebranded as OP Love Birds was on fire again.

I couldn’t make out the face of the woman on the picture, but she had the same hair colour as Pr Y/L/N. And there was a dog in the picture too. Black and white dog. (it was adorable btw).

Okay, so H-B is definitely NOT single. And it could be Y/L/N.

And can we mention how he weirdly just… BOLTED out of the room?

Like?

Sir?

Calm down! Those legs are long enough to carry you at lightspeed already…

Unless he wanted to go back to Y/N!

OMG… I want them to be together so bad, they would be so cute together!!!

God, you had to talk to Andrew.

You finally had received a response for the publication of your article. The email dropped during your class, but you managed to sneak a peek at it, and… the article was accepted!

You were over the moon, and got distracted during the end of your class, you would willingly admit that. You stammered, stumbled over your words a few times, but it was okay. You didn’t mind. You couldn’t mind losing your cool when you had spent so long working on this bloody article. But it was finally accepted, it would be published, with your name on it, printed in full and you wanted to cry from the sheer expectation of finally seeing it for real, on a computer screen, with the name of one of the most renowned journals at the top of your paper.

You hurried through the corridor, knowing Andrew was coming back from a class too, and would soon have a meeting with some of his students about an essay. There was no time to lose. You wanted to celebrate with him, and get lots of hugs and kisses and see his proud grin on his face…

He heard you running down the corridor when he was just a few steps away from the door of your shared office, and he raised a perplexed eyebrow as you rushed closer.

“You’re alright?” he asked, turning fully to you.

“IT’S ACCEPTED! IT’S ACCEPTED!”

His surprise turned into bliss.

“Your article, you mean?” he asked, and you nodded excitedly, rushing in his open arms.

You buried your face in his chest, and jumped up and down in excitement. Andrew laughed.

“Congratulations, darling! You worked so hard on it!”

“Yes, I did!” you quipped, looking up at him.

“I’m so proud of you, that’s amazing!”

“YES!”

He checked the corridor, but there was no one in sight, so he bent down to kiss you, loving and passionate and taking your breath away.

“I’m so proud of you, baby!” he cooed, holding you tight again. “That’s amazing, congratulations!”

“I mean, it’s not my first paper… but it’s my first on this subject, and in such a big journal too…”

“Babe, I’m incredibly proud of you! And you should be too! Now, we can drink that bottle of champagne I had stashed for this.”

“You bought champagne for this?”

“Of course! You were so nervous about it… I know how important it was for you.”

“Thank you,” you looked up at him with tears in your eyes, and Andrew fondly shook his head at you.

“It’s the bare minimum, honey.”

“It isn’t. You’re the best boyfriend since Mr. Darcy.”

Andrew let out a loud laugh.

“Wow… that is very high praise!”

“The highest.”

You finally pulled away, but kept on holding his hands in yours.

You jumped at the sound of giggles coming from the staircase that led to the corridor, and you both let go, reluctance making your movements too slow for Andrew’s students not to notice…

“Ha! Come in, let’s take a look at what you’ve found so far,” Andrew called his students, and you greeted them as well.

It took them thirty seconds after they were out of your office to text the group.

THEY HAVE TO BE TOGETHER!!!

THEY WERE HOLDING HANDS IN THE HALLWAY WHEN WE ARRIVED TO THEIR OFFICE!

WHAT?!

OMG!!!

We need more proof! It is pretty compelling, but were they really holding hands?

They were letting go when we arrived.

God, I’m certain they’re together. ADORABLE!

We need more proof, just to be sure…

There was something off with your students, of that you were certain.

Nothing bad, by any means. They were all pretty fun to be around, focused on their studies too. You couldn’t complain about that class, really.

Except that they had started being a little weird for the past few weeks. They were whispering when they saw you, especially if Andrew was with you. You noticed that they tried to drag the informal conversations you had with them towards your personal life. But your doubts turned into certainty as you overheard a conversation between three of your students.

“They have to be together. Saoirse said they saw them holding hands.”

“They weren’t holding hands, they looked like they had been holding hands.”

“I’m sure Y/L/N and H-B are together.”

H-B?

Your brain finally clicked… Hozier-Byrne. Right…

“We need more proof.”

“More proof than the way H-B looks at her? Gosh… he’s head-over-heels… I wish someone could look at me like that.”

“He already looked at her like that when we were in first year, Sheily. And they weren’t together for sure at the time.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“The longing?! Now it’s more, ‘happily with the love of my life’ vibes. He looked sad every time she turned away back then.”

You decided that you had eavesdropped long enough and made sure to make a bit of noise before finally walking out of the classroom and into the corridor where your students were chatting. They fell silent as they saw you, but greeted you with a warm smile and polite hello.

You were to meet with Andrew at the library on the campus, both of you needing to pick up some books there. There was a sort of cafeteria nearby, where you wanted to pick up a snack and some coffee.

And Andrew was waiting for you, indeed, leaning against the stone wall of the library, with a hand in the pocket of his blue jeans, too busy looking at his phone to notice the way the students that passed by him were staring. It made you smile, the way he was truly clueless of how good he looked like this, with his hair let loose to reach his shoulders, white shirt, blue jeans and denim jacket, looking effortlessly handsome. Your heart skipped several beats at the sight. He must have felt you staring, because he finally looked up from his phone, readjusting his glasses, and immediately grinned as his gaze met yours.

“Hey! How was your class this morning?” he asked, and you saw the way he closed and opened his fist, longing to touch you but refraining as you were in public, and working.

“Nothing worth mentioning except… something I’ve overhead. Got tea to spill.”

He laughed, bright and loud as he opened the door of the library for you.

“Oh, I can’t wait to hear all about it over coffee.”

“See! I knew you loved gossips as much as I do.”

“Hardly.”

“Yes, you do.”

“Absolutely not.”

You playfully stick out your tongue, making him giggle.

“Well, you’ll be definitely interested in that one, because it concerns us.”

“Us?”

“Yep…”

“Why would it be about us?”

“I’ll tell you later,” you teased, walking further into the library to pick up the books you needed, throwing a teasing smile over your shoulder, and if he replied by a roll of his eyes, he was blushing too.

You met up again to borrow the books, and Andrew read the summary of the two books you were taking with you as you exchanged niceties with the librarian. He kept carrying your books as you walked out of the building and towards the cafeteria.

It was almost an accident as you spotted the three students you had overheard earlier that morning. You were walking and chatting with Andrew, who was asking questions about the books you had just borrowed, when you felt someone staring. And indeed, the trio was looking at you and Andrew, whispering before deciding to follow you towards the cafeteria.

“So, that’s the analysis you were talking about yesterday, that pushed forward the historical and social dimension in the plays?” he asked, a small frown creasing his brow, showing that he was thinking and that he was fully focused on your conversation. Your heart beat a little faster at the thought.

“Hmm. Yeah, that’s it.”

“Sounds interesting. A little… narrowing, but interesting.”

“The second one is linked to Bakhtine’s theories though.”

“Hmm… yeah, I see. So, you’re…”

“Andy.”

“Hmm?”

“Sorry, I know I’m interrupting, but… see the three students behind us?”

“The ones we’re both teaching you mean?” he asked, trying to discreetly look over his shoulder.

“Yeah… they’re the ones I overheard this morning.”

“Oh… and? What did they say?”

You opened the door of the cafeteria, and joined the queue.

“They were discussing whether or not we are a couple,” you said in a whisper so he would be the only one to hear, and Andrew had to bend closer during the rest of the conversation.

“What?”

“They were arguing on whether or not we are a couple.”

He blinked, taking a couple of seconds to process your words.

“Oh… I see… I guess we weren’t as discreet as we thought we were.”

“I guess not. They mentioned how you look at me a lot.”

His cheeks turned a bright shade of pink, but his gaze didn’t waver, remained fixed on you.

“Oh… I see.”

“Lovingly, apparently. You are ‘head-over-heels’ as they put it,” you teased, making him chuckle and blush even more.

“I can’t deny that,” he answered in a smooth tone that made butterflies erupt in your stomach. “It is hard to hide my thoughts when I look at you.”

“Hmm… I knew you adored me.”

He laughed.

“More than you could ever imagine,” he answered with a tender smile, while you took a step closer to the counter. “Although, not just that. I often imagine you in… interesting positions as well.”

You choked on your own breath at that, and Andrew sported a content smirk in return.

“Right… anyway. Apparently, we’ve blown our cover. Our students are catching up on us.”

“And what do you suggest we do then? I mean… we’re not breaking any rules, or doing anything wrong.”

“What are you saying?”

“That… maybe that’s okay if they know about us. I for one… wouldn’t mind that much.”

You couldn’t refrain your smile.

“At the beginning, you were adamant that we had to remain professional at Trinity.”

“Hmm… I mean, it was the beginning. I couldn’t be sure if it would work out between us. It was safer this way. Two teachers dating is gossip enough, without adding a break-up into the mix.”

“Hmm… but now?”

He looked away, turning to the list of pastries to choose a snack.

“What cake do you want?”

“A chocolate muffin.”

“I think I’ll take a blueberry one. And yes, you can have a bite,” he answered before you could ask the question.

“You didn’t answer.”

“Answer?”

“Why aren’t you worried about people finding out about us anymore?”

You saw the way he clenched his jaw, the way he tightened his hold on the books under his arm. His gaze was fleeing yours, still focused on the sweet treats in display, but he did answer, his voice so low and deep you barely heard him.

“Now, I know you’re the love of my life.”

You blinked tears away, staring at him, taking in a sharp breath at his words.

“So… I don’t mind if all our colleagues know, even students. I’m not afraid of you suddenly realising that you could have better and dumping my arse anymore. I’m not afraid of us not being able to make our lives align, or whatever obstacles might be thrown at us. I just… I really just want to stay with you forever, so… who cares if they know? I’m not afraid of a break-up anymore. So, I don’t mind.”

Finally, he looked down at you, frowned a little at the sight of shining tears caught on your eyelashes, but when you grinned up at him, he smiled too.

“I love you so much, you know?” was your only answer, and Andrew nodded.

“Yeah… I’m starting to believe in that concept,” he chuckled.

He didn’t move away when you touched his arm, hand moving down towards his. Instead, he took his fist out of his pocket, intertwined his fingers with yours.

“I really want to give these girls a heart-attack,” you confessed.

“You sure?”

“Hmm… are you okay with that?”

“Murdering students is illegal. Even if it’s not fully intentional.”

You chuckled, mumbling something about how silly he was. But then his stare caught yours, and you didn’t think as you rose to your tiptoes to meet him halfway, so you could kiss him.

When you pulled away, Andrew dropped a peck on the top of your head, before letting go of your hand to wrap his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close. You wrapped your arm around his waist too, while discreetly looking over your shoulder.

The three girls were going crazy.

“So?” Andrew asked, moving forward as someone was leaving the queue.

“We might have to call an ambulance.”

You both laughed, and you rested your head on his shoulder, feeling his warmth sip into your frame, filling you with quiet and love.

[thewritingofamadwoman]

Should I Stay, or Should I Go?

Happy Monday! I hope I did this request justice, tried to keep it light with a bit of angst. Not sure where I want these two to end up but let me know what you think!

Requested by the lovely @caseyandsloan

Pairing: Mark Sloan x Fem!Reader (gave her a name but no descriptions used)

Warnings: A bit of Angst, Mark being Mark.

“Annalise, wait-“

I rolled my eyes at the sound of the familiar voice trailing behind me.

“Don’t you dare ‘Annalise’ me. It’s DOCTOR Grey to you, Doctor Sloan. I have no interest in speaking to you so please go whore yourself to any other attending,”

I continue walking until I reach the nursing bay, pulling out one of my patient’s charts and looking into their case. Mark stood in front of me, and gave me an apologetic smile.

“Fine, “Doctor” Grey, can you please just hear me out. I came to Seattle to find you, to apologize. I want to be part of your life again. What I did was a mistake, but you have to know that I never stopped loving you,” he pleaded, his eyes begging me to believe him.

My heart wavered, feeling a million and one emotions in a span of a few seconds. Our life together flashed before my eyes; our first date, our time during medical school together with our friends, being best man and maid of honor at Derek and Addison’s wedding, finding out we were pregnant. The last memory to cross my mind however, was the scene I walked into back in New York. The way he and my ex-best friend Addison Montgomery, were in bed together. My gaze immediately hardened once more.

“Here’s what you’re NOT going to do, Mark. You’re not going to show up to my place of work and bat your baby blue eyes at me in hopes of me taking you back. You ripped my heart into *shreads* Mark. I loved you. Part of me still does. But you don’t get to prey on that minuscule part of me. Not anymore. Now get the hell out of my sight before I call security,” I could feel my eyes water as I glared at him, the hurt fueling my heart.

Before Mark could say anything else, I heard a voice I’d never been more thankful speaking up from behind me.

“Is everything alright, Annalise?” I turned to find Miranda Bailey staring at me with her arms crossed, turning her head to shoot daggers at Mark. My sister, Meredith, was standing beside her along with the rest of the interns, looking on.

“Everything’s fine Miranda, thank you. Come on Meredith, I think you and Yang on my service today,” I walked forward, hearing my sister’s sneakers trail behind me. Rounding the corner I paused against the nearest wall and let out a deep breath. Meredith came to a short stop behind me.

“So…who was that?”

I scoffed humorlessly. “That, Mer, was Mark Sloan,”

“Wait. THE Mark Sloan? The guy who slept with your best friend? Derek’s best friend?Jolie’s father? THAT Mark Sloan?” Meredith’s eyes widened comically and both she and Christina looked back down the hall, as if trying to catch a glimpse of the man in question.

“Yup. The one and only jackass,” I huffed. I took a deep breath, put on my game face, and pushed off the wall. Mark Sloan had taken so much from me, and I wasn’t going to let him piss me off at my place of work anymore.

“Wait, wait. Derek’s best friend, who slept with Derek’s WIFE was married to you, Derek’s other best friend? What, was this some sort of doctor orgy?” Christina said as we made our way to our first patient.

“First off, we were never married. We were together for six years. But welcome to the Grey-Sloan-Shepherd family dynamic, Yang. Stick around, there’s so much more to come,” I rolled my eyes as we reached the patient’s room. The day continued and I managed to forget about Mark. That is, until I saw Derek punch him in the middle of the nursing bay. I gasped, along with the rest of the on-lookers before following Derek with my eyes as he walked away.

“That was one hell of a punch, Shepherd’s a badass!” I turned to see Alex Karev smirking to George O’Malley who looked like a fish out of water as his eyes trailed between Derek, Mark, Meredith, and finally to me. I raised an eyebrow at him, and he immediately looked away, a deep blush spreading along his cheeks.

I sighed. Fuck, this was going to be one hell of a fucking day.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The sound of a lunch tray slamming down onto the table tartled me from my deep thoughts. I looked up to see Callie Torres and Miranda Bailey looking at me sheepishly. I nodded and both women sat down, waiting for me to speak first. I rolled my eyes playfully, taking a bite of my carrot.

“Go on, I know you want to ask..”

“Holy SHIT, Anna. THAT’s Mark? He’s fucking hot!” Callie gushed, looking around to make sure the man in question wasn’t around. Bailey scoffed and nudged Callie.

“Torres!”

I laughed at Bailey’s exclamation.

“No, she’s right Miranda. He’s ridiculously hot. But he’s also the biggest asshole on the planet,” I shrugged, taking a sip of my coke.

“Mind if we ask what happened? All we know is that you came to Seattle after breaking up with your ex. There’s definitely more to that if he’s back here begging for you to take him back.” Callie said, smiling sympathetically. I let out a deep breath and allowed myself to think back to the good old days.

“What’s there to tell? He was the love of my life and we were happy. And then he decided to fuck my best friend, in turn hurting both me and HIS own best friend.”

Both women stayed silent, knowing that there was more to come.

“Two years ago Mark and I were the couple that everyone was jealous of. The country’s most well renowned plastic surgeon and cardio thoracic surgeon, tackling New York together. Mark, Derek, Addison and I were truly the best of friends. Addy and I grew up together and when we met Mark and Derek in college the four of us were inseparable. Derek and Addison got married after we all got our PhD’s and Mark and I were over the moon for them.

“A few months after the wedding, I found out I was pregnant. And after seeing how happy Mark was at Derek’s wedding I assumed he’d be just as happy about the baby. I mean, we spoke about our future all the time but I guess it was just all talk to Mark. The second I mentioned I was pregnant, he changed. He started staying late at Cornell, taking on case after case. It was like he was never home. And I didn’t question it, I just assumed he was busy, maybe even working hard to save up for the baby. But one rainy night, Derek and I worked a late together and he offered to drive me back home when we finished up. Since’s Derek and Addison’s place was close by, we walked there so Derek could grab his car from the garage. The second we walked in to the house, we both knew something was up. The sight of a familiar leather jacket on the ground next to a pair of haphazardly tossed heels made my stomach drop. Derek and I shared a glance, both of our hearts breaking simultaneously.

“Derek walked up the steps to his bedroom while I did my best to keep myself from hyperventilating. The second I heard Addison’s gasp and Mark’s voice calling out for Derek, my heart shattered into a million pieces. Derek flew back down the stairs, eyes watery. Our gaze locked and he grabbed his keys and raincoat, pulling me by my hand, doing his best to drag me out of the house but not before a familiar silloutte stood at the top of the stairs.

“Annalise…”

Mark’s voice cracked with shame and my tears finally spilled over. That was the last time Mark and I saw each other. Derek and I immediately went back to the hospital where we spent the night consoling each other in silence. We were shocked. Sick to our stomaches. Devastated. Jolie was born 7 months after that and it’s just been the three of us ever since. I officially made Derek Jolie’s God-Father and we’ve been happy. Mark tried to reach out multiple times but I packed up and left Seattle shortly there after. Changed my number and just lived my life for my little girl.

So watching Derek sucker punch Mark truly made my day. I even got myself a cookie to celebrate,” I took a bite of the cookie in hand and smiled at the women infront of me.

They both looked disheartened and yet happy to have gotten the full story.

“Thank you for telling us Anna. If you need anything at all, we’ve got your back,” Callie said, smiling and placing a hand over mine. Miranda nodded.

“Absolutely. I’ll kick that little shit in the balls if he ever attempts to come near you if I have to,” I laughed and smiled back at them, happy to have friends like them.

Hours passed and I was staring at the OR grease-board while chewing on a twizzler before hearing two familiar voices off to my left.

“Welcome aboard Doctor Sloan, Seattle Grace is proud to have you,”

I turned to see Chief Webber shaking hands with Mark. My mouth dropped open, Derek standing a few feet behind me with the same look on his face. I felt like a fish out of water, my heart racing. Suprise, sadness, fear and rage bubbled inside me and before I knew it, I felt myself explode.

���What the fuck Chief!”

Please let me know if you’re interested in a part two. Do you think Annalise should forgive Mark down the line, or should a new love interest join in on all the fun?

[drghostwrite]

My House, My Rules

Pairing: Arizona Robbin’s x Wife!reader

Summary: You and Arizona are married attendings, you’re both performing ground breaking surgeries along with you revitalizing the role of Cheif of surgery, after an extremely long week all you want is alone time with your wife but you’re fellow surgeons seem to get in the way outside of work to.

Warnings: 18+, little angst, smut to fluff

********************************************************

Ding… you heard your phone go off with a text, you figured if it was urgent they would call, so you let it lay on its respective side of the counter while you chopped veggies for your pico de gallo. Tossing some peppers into the bowl you heard it go off again ignoring it. You felt as gentle hands wrapped around you from behind, Arizona leaned her head between your strong shoulders her arms wrapped tightly around your torso, she relaxed her breathing letting it fall in line with yours.

“Hey baby…” you trailed tossing the last of the tomatoes in the bowl and cleaning your hands with the towel over your shoulder, she squeezed tighter around you. You turned in her arms letting her rest her head on your chest, gently wrapping her in your arms and kissing her head, the smell of her shampoo and perfume mixing was intoxicating.

“I’ve missed you.” She whispered, it killed you… seeing the impact this was having on the both of you. You had recently accepted the role of head of emergency medicine which meant paperwork and meetings on top of your existing case load, which is hard enough to manage. Arizona was so proud and extremely patient but it had been a week since you’d had a moment alone together.

“I know, I’m so sorry… Can I make it up to you?” You whispered in her ear.

“What do you have in mind?” She said looking up to meet your eyes, a shy smirk as she played with the buttons on your shirt. Before you could explain your phone started going off.

Ding… Ding… Ding,Ding… you rolled your eyes ignoring it. Turing your attention back to your wife, but before you could go any further your front door burst open, revealing Shepard, followed by Grey, Christina, April, and Karev.

You pulled Arizona against you holding her as they made their way into the kitchen… you couldn’t tell what they were taking about as they were all yelling at once telling different stories. Arizona looked up at you and stepped aside and she saw your face drop, it was a face she’s seen too many times in your ER, it was your take charge face.

“Okay, everyone shut up!” They all stopped talking at once, you were never one to raise your voice so when you did it caught peoples attention.

“What the hell is going on?”

“I just drove…” Derek said a hand swiping over his tired eyes.

“I’m here to watch the cat fight.” Alex said excited as Yang punched his arm causing him to jerk away.

“It started with Kepner…”

“Did not!!”

“Oh did to!!!” They all started yelling again.

“Okay!!!… Look I don’t care what happened or who did what… I don’t even give a damn as to why you are standing in my kitchen right now, what I am concerned about is my gorgeous wife that is standing here with me that I haven’t been able to be with in over a week… So please get the hell out of my house so I can spend the night with my wife.”

they all looked at you shocked and quickly exited the house as fast as they entered, you followed to lock the door, Derek turned with a silent thank you before closing the door behind him.

you returned to the kitchen to see Arizona standing there, a smile across her face, “You know that was really sexy, I love it when you take charge.”

“oh do you?” You said smirking kissing her soft lips.

“Mmhmm…” she said pulling at you shirt buttons again.

“Well then forget dinner for tonight we can heat it up later.” you said pressing against her, her back pushed into the stove as you leaned and quickly ghosted your lips before turning everything off. You leaned down kissing her again and running your hands along her body. You lifted her up setting her on the counter, she pulled the buttons apart and quickly pushed your shirt off your shoulders not breaking the kiss, you pulled at the jeans she wore tossing them to the side and wrapping her legs around you. She ran her fingers over the simple black bra that you wore taking in the sight before her, she quickly pulled off your old Harvard t shirt that she was wearing throwing it to the side, revealing the matching navy bra and panty set.

She kissed you again as your hands explored her body, you hoisted her up wrapping her legs around your torso as her hands ran through your hair one arm thrown over your shoulder as you carried her upstairs to your room trying not to break the kisses.

you placed her on the bed and slipped off your jeans, she looked at the sight before her, you on top of her in your black bra and matching simple black panties, the scar on your abdomen from the shooting, she ran her soft fingertips over the strong muscles that she so admired. She undid your bra sliding it off and taking in the sight before her she ran her hands, gently along your nipples, she looked back up making eye contact with the beautiful woman above her.

you bent and placed bruising kisses on her lips only pulling away to catch your breath letting you lips ghost only mere centimeters apart, your eyes trailing hers. She lifted her leg pressing her thigh against your hip as you ran your hand down her thigh and up her side. You bent down placing kisses on her stomach, your skilled hand unhooking her bra and tossing it aside, you kissed up her body, placing kisses on her breast but before you could go any further she flipped you over. She sat in your lap before working her way down to your legs, gently parting them and pulling your underwear off, tossing them behind her.

“You my love, have already done enough… let me take care of you.” You tried to open your mouth to talk back but she quickly quieted you, by running her hands down your inner thighs. You felt every nerve tingling as she kissed up your thighs, her fingers slid over your slit quickly ghosting over your clit before she inserted one and then two, she wrapped her soft lips around a nipple and you arched your back into her already teetering on the edge. Her fingers pumped in and out slowly at first only picking up pace as you moaned into her kisses.

“Arizona… baby… Oh god… I’m…”

“Hold on love.” She said moving her mouth down to your clit, her fingers kept moving in and out as she pulled it into her mouth, she knew exactly what she was doing and in a couple seconds you would be seeing stars.

“Arizona…” you moaned with a high pitched whine, your hands one tightly gripped the sheets the other tangled in her hair as she pushed you over the edge. You felt your muscles tighten and then release as you climaxes she pulled her fingers out letting her mouth take over and coax you back down, that was until her nose ghosted over your clit and she heard your whimpers and pressed a little harder, the aftermath causing your legs to tremble. She crawled back up your body laying on your chest.

“Thank you.”

“for what, you did all the work.”

“I just wanted you to know you were loved and I wanted to do this, you’ve worked so hard all week you needed to relieve some stress.”

“well in that case it’s your turn next.”

“in the morning… can we just lay here for now, i just wanna lay here and enjoy my wife.”

“whatever makes you happy baby.” You smiled as you both laid there in each others arms tangled in your own bodies.

[byllsbytch]

☆Bricked Up☆

We sat backstage, awaiting yet another interview to begin. It was the second one of that day, one more to go. We'd just arrived back in Berlin. It was a new normal, not just the traveling, but every time you touched down you were being thrown into another interview. The boys were all pigging out on the big charcuterie board, while I sat still stuck in the chair getting my makeup fixed. 

"She still looks like a clown!" Bill critiqued gesturing his hands to my face. He always focused on the little things. At times like this he couldn't entice himself with food like the other boys. When he was nervous he refused to eat. He couldn't, no matter how many interviews he did he could never get over that same old, sick, overwhelming feeling. 

Bill crossed his arms, staring at me in deep in thought, his eyebrows furrowing together.

 "How can you get so light with a foundation?" Bill complained biting his nails, Georg turned his head, diverting his focus from the cheese and crackers to Bills stressed comments. He nodded in agreement - shoving another pickled onion in his mouth. 

"Scheiße!" He screeched at the stylist, swatting her brush from my face. He got fed up and pulled me from my chair taking me back into the fitting room. 

"Thank you" I whispered. 

"Oh not a problem, now lets see. They should have some thing better back here, something for like an interview with Christina Aguilera or something, I don't know."

-

-

Bill led me out of the fitting rooms, he'd wiped off the makeup and redid my eyeliner like his. We also managed to scavenge for a turquoise and brown halter top with low rise flare jeans. My hair sat wavy with random plaits in my skunk hair. The fit was kinda out of my usual style but it was better than what I looked like previously and to be honest, I was really feeling myself.

"Where have you two been?" Adela questioned holding her ear piece as to prevent herself from being heard by others, "You're on in three!"

The boys already sat in the couch waiting for the cameras to go on air. The room was already loud and giddy but as me and bill walked out into view the whole room erupted loudly in screams and praise.

Tom looked over in our direction and readjusted him self on the couch, getting Gustav to scoot along as he did so. I sat next to Tom seeing as though he made room on the couch. We looked at each other and smiled. 

"Bill did a great job, you look smoking." Tom winked. I felt my cheeks grow hot and forced myself to face the audience. I struggled containing myself but I had no choice but to do so, we were live now. 

"Tokio Hotel joins us tonight while on their Zimmer 483 Tour." the interviewer says with a smile, staring directly in the camera. "Guys, Germany wants to know, how's it been returning home to perform?" 

-

-

The interviewer turned to me, ready to shoot another question. “Y/N, me - along with many other audience members - have noticed you have something pretty eye catching on your belly button."

I looked down at my navel, forgetting the piercing that laid there.

"That is right." I replied looking up to see even the Tokio boys staring at my stomach. Tom smirked then bit his lip.

"It appears even your band members are surprised by your new bedazzlement." He noted.

The dread-head looked me up and down then altered the way he was sitting. Fixing the bag in his pants then pulling the oversized shirt to his knees. 

"When did that happen, why did you choose to get it done?"

"Well. it happened back in uhh, France so about 2 weeks ago and I got it done because, why not? They're pretty cute and right now I have a little playboy bunny dangling from my belly. Pretty neat isn't it?"

The audience and the boys laughed at my response, and I felt a rush of confidence knowing I could make them all smile. The interview continued with questions about our tour, our music, and our upcoming plans. We answered as best as we could, trying to keep it lighthearted and fun.

As the interview came to an end, the boys and I stood up to thank the host and the audience. Tom waited for me to rise first before he got up and stood behind me. His face was flushed as I felt a bulge poke me in the back. My eyes widened as I turned back slightly to look at Tom. He placed his hands on my shoulders and spun me back to face the front not giving me a chance to look away from the audience ahead of us. He tilted his head back slightly, squeezing his eyes tight and biting his lip trying to get his excitement to go away. I felt Tom's hand on my lower back as he used me as a shield, guiding me to the side as we prepared to leave the set. Doing everything in his power to cover this embarrassing moment from the live cameras.

Once we got behind the curtain, Tom grabbed the hat off his head and discreetly placed it over the tent in his jeans. It was the fastest I'd ever seen Tom dart to our dressing room.

"That was amazing, you did great," Bill whispered-yelled to me as soon as we exited the stage.

"Thanks, I couldn't have done it without your help," I replied, feeling grateful for his support.

"Hmm, wonder what happened with Tom" Georg smirked.

As we made our way back to our dressing room, the 3 boys teased me about my new belly button piercing, making jokes and laughing together. As Gustav went to open the dressing room door it was abruptly swung open from the other side to reveal a panting Tom with a smug look on his face.

"Oh hey guys." He breathed his voice was all over the place. "Just a bit puffed out"

”Oh my god!” Bill gagged.

Me and Gustav chuckled while Georg lent towards him and gave him a fist bump.

[chernabogs]

Deepwaters

Inc: Lilia, Malleus, Silver, & Sebek Warnings: Brief mention of blood, implementations of death, mild existential questioning. Some chapter 7 spoilers may be seen, but they're quite subtle (nothing major) WC: 3.1k Summary: 4 brief snapshots to the poem 'What are Heavy?' by Christina Rosseti centred on youth, the ocean, and the consequences of memories. (done for the @briarvalleyarchives 'Summer Shorelines' event :) )

LILIA.

What are heavy? Sea-sand and sorrow; 

“I reckon you would not be able to swim past the rock crevice there.” 

A girl's voice holds pride as she stands on the beach, her hands on her hips and her lips curled into a cocky smile. Before her are two boys—one, who looks irate with her words, and another, who looks as though he wishes to sink into the dusty white sands. The irate boy gives a snort in response before looking out to the waters. 

The ocean is wine red with the setting of the sun and the waves hit the shore like hands grasping forward. The horizon is but a jagged line, as though it’s a starving mouth waiting to see who it will bite. 

“I reckon you want us dead,” the irate boy counters. “If you want to challenge us, Mallenoa, then perhaps you should try it first.” 

Mallenoa’s cocky grin falters for just a moment before she huffs and crosses her arms over her chest. In the distance farther up the shoreline, a few guards can be spotted observing the trio as they stand there. 

“I have already proven myself capable of swimming there, Lilia. You and Revan were the ones too cowardly to follow along.” Mallenoa points to the rock crevice again. It’s a few yards out from the shore—not a grand length—but the sea is growing unsteady as night makes her rapid descent. “I dare you.” 

“It will be getting cold soon. Would it not be better if we just wait until tomorrow?” Revan starts to protest, his wiry voice like wind passing through reeds, but his comments fall on deaf ears as Lilia turns sharply to stare out at the water's beyond. His gaze skims over the toiling surface, watching as the waves leave foam to sink back into their embrace, before he snorts and begins walking forward. 

“No coward's soul is mine!” Is all he calls over his shoulder in return. He wouldn’t be called cowardly by the likes of Mallenoa, simply because he knew her to be the one to never live it down. He could hear Revan’s worried voice calling for him to stop, but these words die as the roar of the waves grows louder and his feet plunge into their icy depths. 

For a moment, he looks down and watches as the red waters swirl around him. In his youth, he remains unaware of the foreshadowing this image holds; he knows little of the red waters he will come to wade through in his future, or of the rivers he will craft with his own hands in the name of Queen and Country. He knows not of how he will drown in salt and copper and steel for a purpose that will fail in the end anyway. He knows not of the clock running out on his halcyon days. 

For now, he is just a boy, too arrogant to say no to a friend. 

The sand weighs him down as he moves deeper into the ocean. The waters embrace his legs, and then his waist, and then he’s falling forward into the abyss below. He moves like he’s always belonged in this darkness; the sensation of the tide rippling across his skin and the sight of the dying light reflecting on the surface above is so calming that he almost forgets to break through. His breath escapes in a flurry of bubbles before he breaches and inhales sharply, looking back to his friends on the shore beyond.

Mallenoa is laughing in delight. The childish innocence of joy darkens her cheeks, and he can still see this in the orange light as she watches him with adoration and pride. Revan stands by her side, his hand grasping her sleeve as anxiety is painted on his features. It is how it’s always been; one bravely diving into the dark, and the other trailing behind her, like a comet and her tail in the depths of space. 

Lilia exhales softly and looks around. The water is still now, like his presence has soothed it, and his body rises and falls slowly. Seagulls cry out from somewhere beyond, perhaps on the rock crevice he’s meant to reach. He pushes back his hair and looks towards his friends once more. The sun is setting further, and they’re beginning to look like nothing but two dark silhouettes on the distant shore. 

It feels isolating, in the middle of these waters, all alone. 

Lilia begins to swim. 

------------------------------------------------

MALLEUS.

What are brief? Today and tomorrow; 

“Prince Malleus, do not stray too far out!” He hears the nanny call from somewhere back on the shore as he hurries down the wooden steps of the pier. There is no one else on this beach except him, his nanny, and Lilia, who has volunteered to accompany the restless boy lest he become too much for the nanny to handle. They had cleared any other attendees of the beach for just this one day—for one day is all the Queen would grant the prince’s guardians when it came to taking him out of the security that was Black Scale Palace. 

The sound of his small feet hitting the sand is like a hiss, and he can feel the heat on his bare feet, his shoes having been discarded as soon as they arrived. He looks up and squints against the brightness; it’s rare for the sun to come out in the Valley, but summer days often bring on a drought, and so week-long periods of nothing but light are not unheard of. 

This heat lasts only a moment before something hides him in shade again. When he looks over, he sees Lilia holding a parasol above them, a bemused expression on his face. 

“Goodness, are you sure you’re a dragon and not a sea serpent? You seem quite eager to get in those waters,” he teases as he fusses over a strand of Malleus’ hair. The young prince swats his hand away with a pout. 

“I am a dragon,” he grumbles back, before rushing forward again, all previous slights now forgotten in his eagerness to reach the clear blue waters. Lilia follows closely behind while the nanny hurries after them, holding a basket with lunch in one hand and the prince's shoes in another. 

Malleus had read a great deal about the sea. Of the creatures that reside within it, of the folklore and mythology it holds, of the vastness and the grandeur. He has not, however, read about just how cold the sea can be, and so when he jumps both feet into the water at once, he lasts all of two seconds before he’s shrieking and running back to Lilia. His hands grasp his guardians arm and he seems downright offended as he looks back to the water. 

“It’s so cold!” He cries, stomping his feet in the sand  as though to warm them back up again. Lilia can’t help but laugh at the sight of the young dragon clinging to his arm—the poor boy looks shattered. He moves his hand to hold Malleus’ and clicks his tongue teasingly. 

“My, did you expect it to feel like a hot bath, little prince?” He laughs as his other hand adjusts the parasol. “Come. I’ll show you the proper way to wade into the ocean.” 

Malleus looks prepared to protest, but Lilia hears none of it as he holds the boy's small hand in his own, guiding him forward until they are at the water's edge once more. The waves are a baby blue colour, and they glimmer in the sunlight like glass and pearls. 

“Now, you must move steadily. Let yourself adjust to the feeling, and then continue on.” Lilia hums as he slowly guides Malleus forward. The prince’s expression turns sour again when he steps back into the cold waters, but then it slowly shifts to contemplation, and then a bright smile as his body adjusts to the temperature change. His hand squeezes Lilia’s tight, as though afraid to let go too soon. 

“The sand feels funny,” he notes in that manner that children so innocently do. He wiggles his toes in the clear blue water and watches as the sand slides easily off his skin. He moves closer to Lilia. “Please don’t let me go. I don’t want to get pulled in.” 

“As if I’d ever let that happen to you,” Lilia muses, holding the prince’s hand close. “I’d never hear the end of it from your grandmother if I did.” 

He looks up then, his gaze going to a familiar rock crevice in the distance. The sun beats down but the parasol shields them both as the sounds of the nanny setting up a towel for lunch, accompanied by the ocean waves crashing against the shore, creates a strange rhythm of peace in the air. 

This is broken when Malleus kicks up water onto Lilia’s legs. 

“Malleus!” Lilia yelps, moving back while still holding the prince’s hand. Malleus laughs in delight at his guardian's expense, and his face is filled with unrestrained joy. It’s the happiest that Lilia has seen the prince in a long time—in the palace on his own, he often looks quiet and sullen, as gray as the walls that confine him. This new sight reminds Lilia of a similar face with a similar expression he once saw on this shore, long ago. 

He squeezes Malleus’ hand, and shakes his head with a smile as the boy goes to splash him once again. 

------------------------------------------------

SILVER & SEBEK.

What are frail? Spring blossoms and youth;

“Why can I hear the ocean?” 

Lilia’s eyes open slightly as he hears a voice. At first he sees green, and then he sees a scowl, and then he recognizes the inquisitor to be that of Sebek Zigvolt, who looks thoroughly unimpressed with a shell in his small hand. Lilia looks past Sebek, and then to his right, where he spots Silver half-asleep on the beach towel next to him. 

Good. All his children he’s set to watch are accounted for, despite his impromptu nap. 

“What do you mean?” Lilia hums as he sits up slowly. His answer is given in the form of Sebek shoving a seashell against his ear. 

“I can hear the ocean!” The boy declares, louder this time and with more urgency in his tone. Silver mumbles something and sits up as well to look at Sebek with a faintly confused expression. Lilia puts his hand over the shell and guides it away from his ear. 

“Because it carries a part of the sea in it.” Truthfully, it’s the sound of your own ear fluid being echoed back, but Lilia figures that will lead to even more confusion if he were to say something like that instead. 

“How did it get the sea in there?” Silver yawns before moving closer to his father and friend, peering at the shell with interest. He reaches out to grab it, turning it over and letting the light reflect on its rainbow-like surface. “Trapping things is mean. What if the sea wants out?” 

“I’m sure the sea is quite happy in there,” Lilia replies as Sebek comes to sit down on his other side. Both boys are now up and active, and although today is meant to be a break from learning and training, it doesn’t seem like this will be the case. Silver shakes his head. 

“But what if it isn’t happy? What if the shell just thinks the sea is happy, but really, the sea is sad?” Silver presses the shell to his ear, and his expression becomes a bit more concerned as he looks back to his father. “I don’t want the sea to be sad.” 

“The sea isn’t sad. The sea can’t feel anything,” Sebek counters with a scowl before looking back to Lilia. “Right?” 

Lilia has to admire the fact that both boys manage to have such polarizing views on the matter. Youth never fails to amuse him. He carefully takes the shell back from Silver and turns it over in his hands. The shell is frail—he can see chips in its surface already. It isn’t a young shell, that’s for sure. A faint breeze passes over the trio, carrying the scent of ocean water and blossoms from the trees that they sit beneath.

Lilia glances up. Apple blossoms, it seems.

“Shall I free the sea, then? That would mean shattering the shell.” Lilia glances between the two boys. “Would you like me to break such a pretty shell?”

Silver looks uncomfortable with the question as his hand comes out to grasp his fathers arm. “I think… I think we should. The sea should be with the rest of itself, not locked away in a shell. That isn’t fair.” 

“But who are you to decide what’s fair and what isn’t? Who are any of us to decide?” Lilia hums, a small smile playing on his lips. Perhaps there’s time to still sneak a few lessons in here for the boys to keep knowledge down the line. Silver looks more concerned as he glances at Sebek to answer. 

Sebek puffs his cheeks out for a moment as he looks at the shell. His hands clench and unclench in his lap before he looks at Silver, and then to Lilia. “If it’s stuck inside, it’s our job to let it out, even if we like the shell. It isn’t right.” 

“It isn’t right?” Lilia turns the shell over again, and then glances between the two boys. “Well then, if we’ve all come to a decision.” 

He clenches his hand, and the shell snaps in half like it’s nothing. A trickle of water runs down to the grass beneath them, and then towards the sandy beach just beyond, as though travelling to the ocean it came from. The two boys watch it go as they stay sitting beside Lilia. There’s silence, broken only by the faint sighs of the wind brushing against the blossoms above. 

“,,, did we make the right choice?” Silver then asks, looking at Lilia expectantly as Sebek quickly does the same. Lilia brushes his thumb across the shell fragments for a moment, studying its shattered opal interior, and then he simply shrugs with a smile. 

“We won’t ever know if it was the right choice, but it was the choice that we made, nonetheless, and it’s the one that we shall have to live with. That’s just how it goes.” 

------------------------------------------------

OUR FAMILY.

What are deep? The ocean and truth. 

The scent of the ocean is too strong. The sun is too bright, the sand is too perfect, and it’s the only way that the three of them know this is another illusion they’re trapped in. The faint cries of seagulls in the distance and the waves crashing against the sand fill the otherwise stagnant painting they’ve been etched into. Silver looks around in worry, as does Sebek, but Lilia’s gaze is fixated on the rocky crevice in the distance.

It looks jagged, and blurred, as though someone blended it in with the horizon in a mock attempt to make it exist. 

“You look concerned.” 

And then he’s there. Tall, with his expression unforgiving as he stands in the toiling waters, looking back at them with faint indifference in his gaze. The sea kisses his boots as though worshipping him, and the breeze rustles his clothing slightly. Lilia exhales softly as he senses Silver and Sebek tensing by his side. 

“Is it not right?” Malleus looks back out at the deep waters beyond. The sky is the gentle pink of dusk, and the sun is hidden in a painted haze as the silhouettes of birds fly in the distance. The horizon blends together and makes the ocean look as though it’s never-ending. This entire experience has been never ending so far—a dream upon a dream, a nightmare upon a nightmare.

Lilia is tired. He’s sure that the others are, as well. 

“You’re close, but the crevice is off.” Lilia points out at the rocks beyond. Malleus follows his direction and hums thoughtfully. 

“I couldn’t quite remember what it looked like when I was little.” Is the explanation he gives. “It all blurs together in the end anyway, doesn’t it? The memories, the moments. So easily tossed aside without a single warning, without a single goodbye.” 

“Malleus,” Silver begins, but Malleus turns and raises a finger to his lips, hushing the younger boy softly. Sebek looks uncertain as his hand grips his magic pen. Malleus looks as he always has; there is no black ink dripping into the waters he stands in, there is no oppressive presence, no crushing weight of magic. He is as they remember—as their memories painted him to be. 

“I’m adjusting to the waters,” Malleus hums thoughtfully. “Remember how you taught me that?” 

Lilia’s brow furrows. “Malleus, this has gone too far out of line. You must—”

“Would you like to come in?” Malleus cuts him off and holds a hand out. There’s a smile on his lips, but it fails to reach his gaze, which remains as lifeless as the scenery that surrounds them. “I promise not to let you get pulled in.” 

Lilia falls silent as Malleus pays tribute to the conversation they had many, many years ago. The hand he once held now is extended as a mockery to that brief, tender moment between guardian and child. Silver looks to his father and notes the expression on Lilia’s face before glancing towards Sebek. His own hand moves down to grip his magic pen. 

“Sebek,” he calls softly, drawing the other boy's attention for just a moment. Malleus’ gaze turns sharply towards him and darkens. The sky begins to grow a deeper red colour as dusk approaches faster. The waters become a wine red once more, their tide increasing as though to offer an omen foretelling what’s to come. They’re restless, clashing against the sand like blood spilling on a pale earth. “Is the sea sad?” 

Sebek looks confused for a moment, and then the memory dawns on him, and his expression shifts to that of an uncomfortable understanding. He exhales slowly, and the subtle nod he offers is enough for Silver to know that he agrees. Lilia’s attention is still locked on Malleus, on his extended hand and the dark, cold expression he’s giving the other two boys. 

Silver’s hand tightens around his magic pen, and Sebek’s does the same as the sea toils before them, and the sky descends into the blackness of night. If something is trapped, it’s one's duty to let it free, even if it means shattering something that they love dearly. 

They won’t ever know if it’s the right choice, but it’s the choice that they’re going to make, nonetheless.

[orviposition]

How jdj is the side story. I know that LHH is the protag there and most focus is probably on him and his companions. But I just wanted ask for your opinion?

consulted my wife friend about this list so that i wouldn't miss the important moments. a little heads up this post will have side story spoilers

when hsy opens the door at the end of chapter 551, kimcom are sent to a snowfield with two doors in it. in one of them theres a happy ending. kdj woke up and is waving at them. in the 2nd door, kdj didn't wake up. yjh was the first one to enter the 2nd door, Unnoticed by anyone might i add. he's the one who opens the door and says "if it was him, i knew he'd pull something like this"

when we get 49 kdj's pov at the end of season 1 of the side story there's a small scene of yjh bringing 49 food. the scene is not described with full details however we learn that 49 has forgotten most things about yjh, to the point he doesn't even rmbr if yjh has cooked rice for him before. yjh then says this line to him "You don't need to be anything. All that matters is what you want to be" next morning 49 decides to go to the 1865th regression turn in order to help kimcom get back 51.

yjh comes back from a second journey of searching for kdj fragments together with biyoo. he notices that hsy has failed to stop the 41st round, and ignoring lsh's warnings that he's too strong to descend into the 41st worldline bcs the probability will kill him and destroy the worldline immediately once he descends. he says that hsy and ysa need to create conditions for him to descend because "Kim Dokja is mine to bring back" kr fans have noticed that this sentence has two major tones to it. 1, possessive and 2, arrogant. "kdj is mine to bring back since you (hsy) couldn't"

season 3 of the side story has a lot of focus on dkos kdj. he's now lhh's sponsor and talks to him thru midday tryst. and he brings up yjh So Often that even lhh is bored/baffled. not to mention he refers to yjh with a lot of affectionate terms "joonghyuk-ah this, joonghyukie that" recently even selena kim and christina page were all "????" when kdj called yjh "joonghyukie" in front of them

in the beginning of season 3, yjh noticed a source of light enter the "curtain of the 41st worldline" (listen mtl is hard please bear with me) and he immediately slams himself into it, trying to follow after the light. seeing as the curtain is burning him and "grilling him like fish" jaehwan (aka the mc of the world after the fall) has to forcefully pull him back as he shouts "are you crazy" at yjh. spoiler alert, yes he is crazy

not exactly an explicit moment per se, but every time lhh incites himself as kdj or yjh his first thought will always be of the other

in order to subdue an overpowered 41yjh hsy decides to give him happy memories. those memories included a scene where yjh was cooking for kimcom and hsy described it as "yoo joonghyuk was dying from happiness." then the scene quickly puts kdj in the center where he comments about how good yjh's food tastes and that next time they come here (a picnic) they should bring more beef. she succeeds in subduing 41 even though he has never actually met kdj before. later on we learn that 41 also got the memory of the rooftop conversation between kdj and yjh. and like. dare i say. he really sounded a little jealous/sulky abt it. not to call him sp or anything..............

there's a small flashback of a (not written in orv) scene set during 1865th turn. it's about lost memories. yjh tells hsy that he forgets lots of memories whenever he regresses but it's okay because even if he forgets that guy (kdj) will remember them for him.

recent addition: ORV: yjh: you bought a useless skill (preserve humidity) / lsh: but dokja-ssi also has this skill / yjh: kdj has this skill?? *contemplates buying it* |||| SIDE STORY: lhh: this guy (kdj) actually purchased a useless item? (neck pillow) / kdj: but yjh also has this neck pillow / lhh: yjh has this pillow? *after learning its advantages thinks it's a good item* (also kr fans speculate that it was kdj himself the one who bought a neck pillow for yjh)

[theshippirate22]

I posted this and expected it to be a good ol’ two note post but it got a lot of love so I got brainworms. thanks to my personal cheerleader @your-stranger-halfblood-things you’re a dear my darling <33

Stacy really isn’t expecting anything.

To everyone else it’s just April 23rd. There might be a track meet tonight, but even then, it’s ridiculous to equate that to anyone actually thinking of today as a holiday.

Stacy is really, really hoping it can just be April 23rd for her today too.

For a minute, she just lays there on her stomach, face buried in the pillow, and imagines that it’s not normal, that it’ll be just like the days Lottie and Christina turned 17, with laughter and presents and phone calls from home….

It won’t be like that, and she’s knows that, and she knows Olivia is going to do her damned hardest to make it the best day ever, which probably means she’s going to be particularly sweet all day and then they’re gonna have crazy awesome sex tonight and that’ll be that, and it’ll be April 24th and Stacy will be 17.

“Stacyyyyyy…” Olivia sings as she comes in, practically pouncing on her and tickling her sides.

“Ah, God, Liv! It’s seven am!” She squirms away, laughing despite her best efforts. “Cut it out.”

“I’m like 90% sure you have to get tickled on your birthday or you don’t grow right.”

“Oh yeah? What’s your source on that one?”

Olivia climbs over her, settling in between her legs so she can pop her elbows up on either side of Stacy’s head and box her in. “Mm, probably that one medical journal we had to read in Luther’s class.”

“Oh? Conveniently the one I couldn’t read?”

“Mhm,” She nodded adamantly. “See, if you had powered through the frankly macabre and horrific descriptions of blood and boils, you too could know the dangers of birthday tickle deficiency.” She punctuates it with a swift kiss.

“Gross, stop it,” Stacy laughs, weakly pushing her away but not stopping her from nuzzling into her neck and biting softly along her throat.

“Now listen, Stace,” She says, moving up to kiss all of her face. “We’ve got a very strict schedule to keep to today. You’ve got ten minutes before Lottie is coming in here to do your makeup. I told her to keep her hands off your hair, but you know how she is, so I’m afraid that’s a battle you’ve got to fight for yourself.”

“Why’s she doing my makeup? Is something happening?”

“Um duh.” Olivia pulls back to stare at her like she’s stupid. “You’ve got to look fabulous. Because, if I’m not mistaken, you’re turning seventeen at exactly 8:37 this morning and that’s reason for celebration indeed.”

“Why are you talking like that?” Stacy laughs again. “You sound like a founding father. Wait!” She pushes Olivia’s face from hers to ensure she can look her in the eye. “You didn’t tell Lottie it was my birthday right? You didn’t go around telling everyone?”

“No!” Olivia cries, seemingly outraged. “No, I would never!”

“Why are you smiling like that? What did you do? Liv!”

“I didn’t tell Lottie or Christina.”

“Liv!”

“But I may or may not have told Greg, who may or may not have told Lottie and Christina.”

“Oh my God, Olivia Nicole Moore, whyyyyyyy?”

“Because, Stacy Linda Harrington. I love you.” Another kiss, right on the lips. “And I am very stubborn and determined to show you that your family is full of asshats and you should forget about them and remember that you’ve got a family here. Who also loves you.”

Stacy wanted to argue more, but not really, because she was feeling particularly warm and happy in a way that she hadn’t felt for a long time, so she took the chance to kiss Olivia deeper.

Lottie came tumbling in not long after, and Stacy played beauty shop customer with her while Olivia watched smirking from where she sat on the bed. Stacy curled her hair and put on her uniform and Christina came to see what was taking them all so long before dragging them to breakfast.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the lady of the hour!”

“Hi, Greg,” Stacy grins, rolling her eyes.

“Happy Birthday, little missy,” He put his hands behind his back and stood on his toes, leaning toward her. “I know I’m supposed to remain impartial because I’m a TA and shit, but you do know you’re my favorite, right?”

“Impartial, my ass,” Olivia snorts. “Like you even try.”

He shushes her playfully then adds, “I have something for you, Stace.”

“Oh? What is it?”

He leads her back into the kitchens- just her; her friends wait patiently in the hall- and delivers a heaping stack of hot pancakes into her hands.

“It’s not Pancake Day?” Stacy says, trying to ignore the bubbling excitement in her stomach.

“Nah, but I know they’re you’re favorite, so I paid The Beast to make you some anyway.”

“Greg…” She wasn’t going to cry over this. That was ridiculous. God, no one had made her pancakes since she lived in Indiana and that was almost five years ago. “Thank you.”

She flings herself into his arms, holding out the plate to the side to preserve the gift and he rolls his eyes but hugs back nonetheless.

“Go eat with everybody else, I’ve gotta go get the mail, see if you have some birthday cards.”

She scoffs but doesn’t let it bring her down.

So that’s how she ends up in the lunch hall with her friends and her stack of pancakes. At one point, Miss Beastion (aka The Beast) comes to wipe down tables and breaks her glare for a moment to wish her a happy birthday and almost smiles.

Greg brings the mail around to their hall, all thirty of them, and there’s a box and a letter for Stacy.

She picks up the off white envelope first. “Here’s the card from my parents,” she explains. “Let’s put out bets now, yeah?”

“Dear Beloved Daughter,” Christina starts and Lottie bursts into laughter.

“It is your birthday,” Olivia continues.

“Hope to do business with you in the future, Richard Harrington,” Stacy finishes sardonically, slipping her nail under the adhesive and tearing it open.

Their jokes aren’t far from the truth. The card is completely white-except for the back side, which has the Harrington company logo on it- and inside all it says is “Happy Birthday! Love Mom and Dad” with three hundred dollars wedged in.

“Thanks, Donna,” Stacy murmurs.

“Wait, I thought Melanie was your dad’s secretary?” Lottie cuts in.

“Melanie is the one he’s fucking,” Stacy explains and Olivia laughs because she can’t help herself, adding “For now.”

“Donna is too old for him, thank God. She’s his real secretary, the one that used to babysit u- me. She’s been sending cards instead of them since I was like. Ten.”

“Fuck ‘em,” Olivia says suddenly. “Fuck them all! They’re such assholes, all of them!”

“Preach!” Christina whoops. “Fuck them!”

Greg looks up from the staff table, probably because one of the teachers told him to contain his hall, and he comes over for a minute, quickly realizing what’s going on. With a mouth full of blueberry muffin, he agrees, “Oh yeah, fuck the Harringtons.”

“Yeah, fuck ‘em,” Stacy repeats, with less conviction. “Come on, let’s see what this thing is.”

She pulls the box toward her. There’s no name on it besides her own, no return address, no nothing. Lottie takes out her hoop earring and hands it to her so she can use the point to slice open the tape, at which point she hands the earring back and rips the box entirely open.

She isn’t entirely sure what she’s expecting. Whatever it is, though, it’s not what she’s actively looking at.

“What is it?” Greg says through another bite of muffin, peering over her.

Inside the box, is a three inch stack of Bop magazines, undoubtedly issues from at least a couple years with the latest on top, some Wonder Woman comic books, an entire rainbow of nail polish, a new hairbrush, some of the soap you could only get from a shop on Main Street in Hawkins, six or seven 3 Musketeers bars (which happened to be her favorite since she was what? five?), an Agatha Christie book, and three cans of Farrah Fawcett hairspray.

“Is it from your parents?” Christina mumbles, lifting the box to check the bottom and sides for a name. She must find nothing, because she sets it back down dejectedly.

“I don’t… I don’t think so? They wouldn’t send stuff like this to me anyway… it’s too… fun.”

The girls dig into the magazines while they finish eating, and Lottie and Christina get in an argument over whether Matthew Broderick or Tom Cruise is objectively hotter and Greg decides for them, siding with both Lottie and Broderick, much to Christina’s dismay. Then bells are ringing and classes are starting, and the group gets separated.

It’s during third period that it happens. One moment she’s taking notes on symbolism in Macbeth, and the next Greg is leaning on the doorway with a satisfied- albeit surprised- smirk.

“Stacy’s call,” he offers in explanation.

It’s a thing at the school, the calls. A lot of kids are from out of state, some are out of country, so the rule is that every kid can get a call from their parents on their birthday during class. Otherwise, they’ve just got to wait until one of the school’s payphones is open to reach home.

The thing that has her staring at him in shock is the fact that her parents haven’t called in literal years. She gets her compulsory card from Donna and a fistful of cash to buy her satisfaction, and that’s the end of the birthday things.

Last year, she lied when Christina asked. Said she got it during chemistry, the only class she didn’t have any friends in. No one to verify or validate. Greg had covered for her when he overheard the lie.

The year before that, Donna had called instead, saying her Father wanted to call but he was in Taiwan and didn’t have any phone reception. Which was also a lie. But she appreciated it anyway. She cried in the shower that night and Olivia had found her She didn’t ask, for which Stacy was grateful, and they were good friends after that. Until they were girlfriends.

So Stacy is more confused than anything else while she follows Greg back to the office phone. She hadn’t really done anything particularly noteworthy in the last little bit; no reason for her parents to remember she was living and breathing, nothing deserving the call. Maybe they want to yell at her and this is the only chance they know for sure they’ll be able to talk to her.

Greg hands her the receiver and she holds it in her hand for a minute, taking a minute to compose herself for the beat down that’s about to come before she lifts it to her ear.

“Hello?”

“Oh! Hi.”

“Dad?” she mutters in surprise.

“God, please don’t tell me I sound that much like him.”

“You don’t,” she assures suddenly, because it’s true that he really doesn’t sound like her father but she isn’t sure who else he could be.

“Um… It’s Steve…”

Oh.

Oh.

“What? Oh my God, why is your voice so deep?”

He laughs softly. “I’m nineteen, Stace.”

And isn’t that just wild. That snotty whiny kid that threw a fit when she was going to start middle school and refused to be seen in the same district as her is a grown man.

All she says is, “Oh wow.”

“Well, I’m calling to say happy birthday. Sorry they took you out of class… I… I didn’t have your schedule so I was trying to guess? Apparently I didn’t do as well as I thought.”

“Uh, that’s okay,” she murmurs. “It’s kind of a thing around here to be pulled out of class for this anyway.”

“Yeah, it’s your one call for the year, huh?” Suddenly he sounded very small. “I, uh, I tried to call dad. To remind him. But, uh, he changed personal lines and didn’t tell me the new number, and every time I called the company, they just kept rewiring me to Donna, so she gave me the number so I could just call myself. So, um, sorry. It’s just me.”

For just a second, Stacy has that fleeting warmth of being loved, but it’s paired with this agonizing, overwhelming desire. She doesn’t know what for; maybe for him to be like this all the time, maybe for things to be different with their parents, with everything else.

“That’s okay,” she says quickly, trying to sound indifferent. “Thanks for trying anyway.”

“Yeah.” There’s a lapse and he forces out quickly, “Did you get my present? I was trying to time it right so it would get there this morning-“

“That’s from you?”

“Uh, yeah. I hope it’s okay. I didn’t… didn’t really know what to get you, but, uh, the girls I babysit said it was a pretty standard teenage girl gift and they’re like the smartest people I know. But if you don’t like it you can sell the stuff or just give it away and I can send you something else! Just tell me and I’ll get it! I just… when I opened my cash Christmas present I kinda snapped and lost my shit and I figured you’d want something other than cash but I don’t-“

Stacy has about twenty five questions regarding this, starting with “You’re a babysitter?!” but instead she smiles softly at his awkwardness-also so weird for him- and murmurs, “It’s great, Steve. Me and my friends will have a blast.”

“Oh I’m glad. Max said stuff like that is the staple to any good sleepover and boarding school is like an infinite sleepover, right? So I thought I better up the quantity? I don’t know, it made sense to me…”

“Yeah, no, that makes perfect sense,” She agrees quickly. “That’s really… heartfelt.”

“Hopefully it’s better than The Card.”

“God, yeah, they aren’t even trying,” she relays the message from said card, and he snorts.

“You know it’s from Donna, then. Dad’s has never called himself anything other than Richard.”

They laugh about it darkly, and for an instant the solidarity between them is so strong it’s like they were borne from the same soul. Like they aren’t strangers who share a name.

“Hey, listen, Stace,” He adds slowly. “I know you usually go back to the Carolina house or something for summer break- you went to Cabo last year, right? But if… if you want, of course, you don’t have to, but you could come stay with me in Indiana. My friends would love you, you know? I think you’d have fun. It’s not Cabo, but… you know…”

The invitation is weird. Not entirely unwelcome, but bizarre, given that the last time they spoke to each other, they actually weren’t talking to each other.

“Are you dying, Steve?” And she’s only half joking.

He laughs once, awkwardly again. “No. I am very much alive. But, uh, a lot has changed. With everything. Hawkins. Me. You, probably. And it’s stupid that I’ve just been pretending you don’t exist. We don’t… we don’t have to be pitted against each other all the time, you know? We’ve got a common enemy here. And I’m… I’m so sorry about how I was. I’m not like that anymore. At least I’m really trying.”

She swallows back the soft hope building in her throat. “God, they’re such assholes, aren’t they?”

And that’s all it takes. The understanding is so profound it doesn’t need anymore explanation. Especially when Steve adds exhaustedly, “Yes. Yes, they are.”

The treaty is solidified. The olive branch taken.

He asks her a few more questions about her birthday, the standard things, and she tells him about her pancakes and the cupcake she’ll get at lunch and that Greg will probably make the whole cafeteria sing to her, and she pointedly leaves out the plans Olivia has for her tonight and the blunts she bought a few weeks ago for a special occasion. She writes down his number and she seriously considers snagging a payphone and calling him a few times before school gets out.

By the time she hangs up, she walks to fourth period, that she is significantly late for, and when she slides into her seat next to Olivia, she’s got a peculiar little smile that won’t seem to go away.

“Was that your call?” She whispers, even more shocked than Greg.

“Mhm,” She nods dazedly.

“It was your parents? Did they yell at you?”

“It was my brother,” Stacy says softly.

She didn’t think it was possible for Olivia to look more surprised but somehow she manages, eyebrows shooting up and eyes growing wide.

She doesn’t say anything else, instead turning her attention to Mr. Hansen’s lesson, until Olivia elbows her and mutters, “What are you thinking about?”

Stacy grins. “Do you wanna come to Indiana with me this summer?”

[basilone]

For every bit of writing that makes it onto this blog, there's also writing that doesn't. I recently realized that I've never shared a piece that's purely Lottie/Darlene, even though I'd already written a good chunk of it. I spent some time completing it, because y'all have been too sweet about them both and I'd love to share the start of their relationship with you. This is Lottie/Darlene stateside, pre-England, figuring themselves out as they go along. Warnings apply for their talk about homophobia, sex, and their not-so-great home lives. They also get a little smutty about it (it's Lottie/Darlene, of course they do), so that's why there's a content warning. 😉I hope you'll enjoy it!

“Lot?”

“Yeah?”

“You goin’ home soon?”

Lottie blinks up at the ceiling. Sometimes, she forgets who she’s told. Who’s been made privy to her life like that – thrown out of the house, working odd jobs she’s not suited for – and who she’s not managed to tell anything about it just yet. She’s mentioned it at flight training. Shrugged it off like water gliding off a duck, because some of the girls were feeling mighty stressed about whatever the hell their families were gonna say about joining up with the army. She’s certainly mentioned it to the fellas she’s flying with most, though she hasn’t said why.

“Nawh,” she says, now, rolling her head as well as her eyes. “Nobody’s gonna want me there.” She tries to smile. Feels it strain at her mouth, worn too thin and brittle, before it’s safe to exhale a small sigh. “Why’d you ask?”

“Them society pages said your family’s got some anniversary type o’ thing going on? Least, that’s what Christina Heartfield was sayin’. She keeps up on that sorta information like it’s gonna win the war or somethin’.” Darlene’s slight scoff tells Lottie exactly what she makes of that. “Thought ya might, I dunno, head back home.” The bed dips slightly under Darlene’s weight as she shifts atop it, restless like she’s been the past few nights. “Whatchu mean, nobody’s gonna want ya there?”

“Tiny needs to keep her gossip mouth shut.” Lottie doesn’t put a lick of venom behind the words. As far as gossips go, Heartfield won’t hold a candle to her mother. “And I mean that they won’t open the damn door for me, probably. Or they’ll open it up but I’ll be spendin’ every moment of that party with half the family watching me like a damn hawk and peckin’ at all my mistakes.” She lets out a long-suffering sigh. Chances a glance at Darlene, who’s turned toward her and is studying her a little too closely. “Don’t look at me like that, Dar.”

“Like what?”

“Like that,” she says, turning onto her side and raising an eyebrow at her. “Like you’re feeling sorry for me or some shit. It’s fine. I don’t wanna go home, all right?”

“Sure. Don’t mean it don’t sting.” Darlene’s half-shrug slips the band of her nightgown off her shoulders. She doesn’t bother putting it back – Lottie’s not even sure she felt it – but peers at Lottie with all the might of someone who’s trying to decipher something instead. “It’s different when you got a choice,” muses Darlene out loud, voice hushed in the quiet of a too-warm bedroom. “When ya can just decide whether you wanna go back or not. Like the rest of them girls do. But when it’s you and me, we don’t get choice. We just get told to please not come back.”

Lottie feels her mouth go dry. “Dar…”

“I left when I was six months shy of turnin’ eighteen. Woulda waited, except my mama’s new boyfriend was a piece o’ junk that deserved a beatin’”– and Darlene’s matter-of-fact tone tells Lottie exactly who delivered on that –“and I got caught with my head under Janie Charles’s skirt around that same time. Didn’t feel like stickin’ around for that sermon any. Pastor damn near got himself a heart attack when he caught us in the back o’ the church.”

“Darlene,” says Lottie, because the words head and Janie and skirt and caught don’t make full sense, “what’re you sayin’?” She studies the little red curls plastered to Darlene’s freckled brow. Easier than looking into her eyes and seeing herself staring back. “You… uh.”

“Made Janie Charles cry out for Jesus in a church pew with my tongue between her thighs?”

“Jesus,” says Lottie, before she can stop herself, “that’s worse than me getting caught with my hand up Rosalie Devereaux’s skirt at my family’s Christmas brunch while she was kissing my neck.”

“I don’t know,” says Darlene, seemingly not caring about the furious blush that’s working its way into Lottie’s cheeks or the brewing fear that melts heavy on Lottie’s tongue the longer Darlene keeps talking, “seems to me like your family cares more about what’s proper than mine. All my mama said to me was Jesus Christ, Darlene, at least we know you ain’t gonna starve earning your living on your back. I’d already gotten an earful for givin’ one of them Lawson boys a hand in the back o’ his truck about a week or two before the Janie thing happened, see?” The laugh that escapes Darlene is throaty, twisted with the same sort of grim amusement that’s been coiling in Lottie’s belly for months now. “When I said she was one to talk, gettin’ five different kids outta four different fellas the way she did, that was that. Can’t stay in a place like that no more.”

“My mother said I was unnatural.” Lottie blinks at the memory. “Rosalie, bless her dumb little heart, said it was all my idea. That she couldn’t stop me from…” Her fist still balls around the bedsheets at the accusation. “She wanted it, Dar, I wouldn’t just’ve…” Wouldn’t have forced a goddamn thing, she almost says, except even the thought of saying it fills her throat with bile. “She got away with Bible study and a stay at a cousin’s summer home. Me? Couldn’t even ask for my mother to pass the salt without her cryin’ into her plate about the vile creature she gave birth to.”

“All your idea to have her lips on your neck and her hand probably already working to get to touch your tits, huh,” says Darlene, folding her own hand around Lottie’s fist so decisively that Lottie releases the bedsheets in a hurry. “Not your fault she feels ashamed of who she is, Lot, all right? Ain’t a goddamn thing wrong about ya. I’m gonna fight your mama any day ya want me to, ya hear me?” Darlene’s fingers squeeze down tight. Lottie still can’t look at her fully. Studies the little freckle near the corner of Darlene’s lower lip instead. “Sorry I brought it up. ’Course ya ain’t goin’ home. You gonna stay with me, have some fun.”

“Fun, huh?”

“Sure thing, sugar.” The little freckle moves with Darlene’s brilliant smile. “This Rosalie, she the only one or just the only one ya got caught with?”

“I, uh,” says Lottie, “might’ve gotten tangled up with Henry Dorrance-Jones a few times. And Feline Montparssat is a real good kisser,” she mumbles, “and, uh, Barbara from daddy’s accounting firm? Kind of?”

“Kind of?”

“She, uh, slipped her fingers into my panties?” Lottie hates that she makes it sound like a question. “I didn’t do anything to her except some kissin’, she said she didn’t want more trouble. But she… uh. It felt really nice?”

“Yeah?” Darlene’s grin broadens to the point where Lottie can’t help but look at her. Her dark eyes sparkle with good humor, corners of her eyes crinkling into a fond smile, and the freckles that dot her nose move up into the little scrunch of amusement Lottie knows all too well. “Of course that feels nice, Lot, Jesus,” cackles Darlene, then, squeezing her hand again. “Glad to know I ain’t the only one making eyes at girls and fellas alike.”

“You’re the only one actin’ normal about it, though.” The only one who hasn’t made me feel like there’s something wrong with that. “Everybody else has… I don’t know.” She can’t really meet Darlene’s eyes any, now. Can’t do more than shrug and pull her hand out of Darlene’s grasp. “All them girls made it feel like a game. Barbara said I was a sweet little thing. Was practically cooin’ about it while she tried and mostly failed to get me off. And Feline’s always kissed just about anybody.”

“And Rosalie was fine doin’ anything as long as she wouldn’t get caught,” continues Darlene, “and we all know Henry’s got more notches in his bedposts than… Aw, shoot, Lot, I didn’t mean… Hey now…”

“Yeah, well,” sniffles Lottie, wiping at her cheeks with the back of her hand, “one of them notches is my virginity, and he was an ass about it, and I still let him because at least then that’d be out of the damn way.” She tries to smile at Darlene. Is sure it comes off awfully shaky and watery, if the feeling of her trembling lip is anything to go by. “And then I c-continued to let him, and p-p-probably racked my total notches up to a handful, b-because… b-b-because…”

“Because at least Henry’s not a girl. And if you’ve got a cock inside ya, and ya like the feelin’, then maybe you ain’t interested in girls after all. And if he fucks ya just right, and you get off on it, at least you won’t be thinkin’ about what it’d feel like to have a girl’s fingers inside o’ ya while her mouth’s on yours.”

Lottie sobers up so abruptly she feels like she’s been doused with cold water. “Dar…”

Darlene’s own smile is brittle. Fleeting. “It don’t work like that, Lot. I tried real hard to make it work and I know it don’t. Highlight of my year was getting fucked by some fella I never even learned the name of and all I thought about while he was doin’ it was how it’d feel to press my mouth between the legs of the pretty girl I’d seen at the dance earlier that night. I clenched around his cock thinkin’ about buryin’ my tongue inside her sweet drippin’ cunt and he was bragging summat fierce about makin’ me do that at first.”

“At first?”

“Well, I told him real quick that I can do that sorta thing whenever I like,” grins Darlene, eyes sparkling, “just to make a fella I’m bored with finish faster. He didn’t like that. Wanted to black my eye about it, so I kicked him in the balls until he started to cry and then took off runnin’.”

“Jesus, Dar,” snickers Lottie, trying to ignore the squirmy feeling deep inside her own belly. “Sounds like we both got shit taste in fellas, at least.”

“At least my taste in girls is good.”

“Is it? Pretty sure mine ain’t.” Lottie rolls her eyes for emphasis. “Or maybe I just need to be with a girl who doesn’t think it’s some game,” she adds, belated, trying not to stare too hard at the freckles that dot Darlene’s nose. “But I wouldn’t know how to recognize that kinda girl.”

“Wouldn’t ya?”

“No?”

“Not even if one’s, I dunno, currently starin’ at ya and tryin’ to figure out the best way to plant a kiss on ya?”

Lottie can practically feel the weight of the question linger in the space between them. Sure, Darlene said it with a smile. Said it like it doesn’t have to mean something more than it does. Like it’s just a little thing she’s offering. But she’s also implied it’s not a game. That this is something that could be… Could just be real.

And it’s not like she hasn’t thought about it any. Sharing a room with Darlene almost demands that she thinks about it plenty. Thinks about it when she’s brushing her teeth while Darlene’s doing her hair. Thinks about it when Darlene’s applying balm to her feet, when Darlene’s giggling over something she read in a magazine, when Darlene’s eating peaches with cream out of a bowl. Thinks about it while she’s getting ready for bed and sees Darlene all sprawled out on the bed beside hers. Thinks about it while she’s in the shower, while she’s out dancing, while she’s… she’s…

Oh.

Darlene’s mouth is soft. So gentle against her own, sweet about it in a way that aches, unhurried like Darlene always seems to be. She’s just there with her, hand warm against Lottie’s cheek, breath fanning out over Lottie’s lips, lips tasting more like sugar than the candy Lottie’s been eating. Pressing into Lottie’s space more decisively when she doesn’t say no.

The rush of her heartbeat pulses in her ears when she kisses Darlene back.

Her breath shudders between them a moment before Darlene’s mouth crashes onto hers wholly. Before Darlene’s tongue swirls around the tip of her own tongue, daring, challenging, and Lottie can’t help but lick her way into Darlene’s mouth just to savor her, to taste her, to get close to her. Her hand’s on Darlene’s cheek and it feels like she’s smiling the same way Lottie’s smiling, mouth quirking up between kisses, breath going just a little ragged for it.

Darlene’s tone is more moan than speech. “Lot…”

She wants to hear that again. Wants to hear Darlene say her name again – moan her name again – and so she chases the sound. Chases it right into Darlene’s mouth, pliant and warm and so goddamn soft, until her tongue slips against Darlene’s and Darlene’s hands fly into her hair in response. She can’t stop kissing her now that Darlene holds her between two hands, fingers wandering, pulling her closer still. Darlene’s all noise about it – little pants and exhales, small whimpers Lottie can’t help but capture – and she’s moving closer, toppling against her, leg and arm and all the rest of her fanning out over Lottie’s body without a care.

“Fuck.” She exhales. Makes it sound like a punctuation mark against Darlene’s throat before kissing her there too. “Dar… Dar, please…” She hardly knows why she’s begging. Doesn’t really realize that she is until Darlene’s mouth nips at her earlobe and Darlene’s breath lodges warm against her ear. “Darlene…”

“You doin’ okay there, pretty girl?”

Lottie nods, breathless, when Darlene pulls back to look at her. Her red hair is a halo in this light, springy with unruly curls, and her freckles move as she scrunches her nose up and grins down at Lottie. Lottie’s never been anyone’s pretty girl before. Hasn’t been complimented like this, so genuine that it makes her head spin a little, so sweetly that it almost makes tears spring into her eyes.

“Maybe,” she says, a little breathless about it, feeling strangely weightless about it, “my taste in girls ain’t that bad after all.”

“Yeah?” Darlene’s giggle lights up the room in such a way that it makes all of Lottie’s hair stand on end. “Got a taste for me?” she teases, voice lower and more like velvet than Darlene’s got any fucking right to sound. She fixes Lottie with her best stare, challenging but seemingly amused all at once. “Do ya really?”

“Fuck, you don’t even…” Lottie groans. Wedges her knee between Darlene’s legs just because she can, just because it makes Darlene fall against her more and makes her make that little noise of pleasure again. Darlene’s all press of curves at her hips, nightgown hiked up her thighs so high that it makes Lottie’s throat go dry, and Lottie clenches her hands uselessly to stop her hands from wandering over her bare skin. “I really wanna taste you, Dar,” she admits, heat unfurling in her whole body, “wanna touch you and kiss you and…”

Darlene rakes her hair back. The band of her nightgown loosens with the motion, showing the soft swell of small breasts beneath the fabric, revealing more freckles that Lottie needs to trace with her mouth if Darlene will let her. “And lemme kiss ya too?” asks Darlene, blush peppering her freckles and turning them redder still. “Yeah?” she checks, smiling, to Lottie’s vigorous nods. “C’mere, honey, let’s get a proper taste of ya…”

A proper taste, Lottie finds, is Darlene’s hands in her hair – pulling and cajoling – and Darlene’s mouth and tongue roaming everywhere over her face and her neck and her shoulders – licking, nipping, suckling, kissing, kissing, kissing – and Darlene pressing against her, leaning in, smelling like peaches and cream and the sweetest thing Lottie’s ever had. A proper taste, she finds, is kissing Darlene back and letting her kisses trail over Darlene’s collarbone until she shivers. A proper taste is interlocking their hands and letting her other hand roam over Darlene’s bare leg, her side, her hair, her smiling face, kissing her all the while.

A proper taste also is Darlene’s nightgown losing the fight for propriety and Lottie solving that by simply covering her with her mouth. She doesn’t think twice about it. Doesn’t think Darlene minds, not with the mewl that escapes her when Lottie’s mouth locks around her nipple. And that makes her want more, makes her bold. Makes her slip the other band off Darlene’s shoulder just so she can kiss a path from one breast to another and make Darlene noisier about it. Makes her nudge her thigh up between Darlene’s legs until she feels that wet press of heat, until all she can think about is what it’d be like to get a taste of Darlene there, until Darlene pants out something between a laugh and a cry about it.

“You’re right,” says Lottie, smug as anything, feeling like she’s gonna fly and crash all at once the same way she does when she glides a plane home, “this is the kinda fun we should be havin’.”

“I’m a terrible influence, ya know,” snickers Darlene, eyes sparkling with mirth. “Look at ya, Lot, kissin’ a girl all improper”– she’s teasing, pinching Lottie’s side as she does –“makin’ a girl wanna eat you up like that, lookin’ like ya do…”

Lottie’s decision is lightning-quick, as though she’s taking a shot in clear blue skies. “I ain’t stoppin’ you.”

“No taking it slow with ya, huh?”

“Dar,” she says, brushing Darlene’s stray curl away from her cheek, “I’ve been thinking about this since the day we met and I thought oh sweet baby Jesus I wanna kiss that girl…”

“If it helps at all,” says Darlene, grinning, “I thought oh good Lord, they put me with the really hot girl, how am I gon’ survive this without makin’ a fool of myself?”

Lottie snorts out a laugh at that. “We’re both fools. Should’ve just made out about this weeks ago.”

“Wanna make it up for it now?”

She nods up at Darlene, breathless, wanting more than she’s ever wanted anything in her whole life. And Darlene, sweet as anything, merely smiles and wordlessly issues the challenge that has always landed Lottie in trouble before: the hell you waitin’ for?

Lottie’s never been the type of girl who needs to be asked this twice.

[tarastabz]

-(un)worthy of love

Sam loves her.

Chad loves her.

Mindy loves her.

Gale loves her.

And even Kirby loves her.

Tara knows it, but that's the problem. She doesn't feel she deserves to be loved.

There has to be a reason why everybody leaves her. She HAS to be the problem. It's not Sam's fault, not her parents' fault and not even Amber's fault. It's hers.

Tara Carpenter makes everybody run away from her.

The guilt Tara feels every time someone on the Internet tries to frame Sam as the villain is almost unbearable. Why can't anybody see that she is the one that deserves to be hated?

Tara wishes she could go back in time and try to change everybody's mind. She wishes she could stop Gale from writing those lines about Sam and instead make her understand who the real bad person in this situation is. She wishes Amber would've actually killed her that night.

If She died, Sam wouldn't have come back, Wes, Judy, Liv and Anika would still be alive, amd Chad, and Mindy wouldn't have gotten injured twice and brought into this mess just because they're Tara's friends.

And then there was him.

How could Tara forget about him?.

The person who tried so hard to protect her, that ended up losing his own life for hers.

Dewey Riley died because of Tara Carpenter.

That's why she doesn't get it. Why was Gale not angry at her? Why was Gale not punching HER in the face? Why was Gale not screaming at her how unworthy of love she is?.

Everyone who has lost their life because of her, deserved to be at her place.

Graduating, going to college, getting drunk at parties, and finding a lover are all things that Tara gets to experience while her friends' bodies are buried 6 feet under.

It's not fair. She doesn't deserve this.

Maybe Amber turning into that monster was actually Tara's fault, too. She should've given her enough attention when she was talking about her precious movies. Maybe Tara was too selfish and that's why Amber felt the need to try to end her life.

Because she was not worthy of continuing a life in which she couldn't care about the others as much as they cared about her.

That's why everybody leaves her.

Tara knows that there's a reason if she's alive, and it's not because she gets to be the "final girl" or "the star of the movie" as some people like to call her on reddit.

No.

Tara is alive because she deserves to suffer and bring everybody down with her.

Sam would be so much happier without her. She would still live in Modesto and live a calm life without having to work 2 shitty jobs just to pay for her sister's needs. But no. Tara had to ruin that, too.

Sam worked so hard to get away from woodsboro and away from her, but even then, Tara had to be selfish and bring her back in that hell of a place.

Maybe Tara should've never even been born. Maybe in that case, Christina would still be a good mother, Her father wouldn't have left, and Sam would've never found those diaries.

Realistically, Tara knows there's no actual connection between Sam discovering the truth, and her.

But, somehow, it was definitely Tara's fault.

Tara's thoughts get interrupted by a glass of water being put on the table in front of her, "Are you alright? You've been sitting here for a while," Sam said, sitting on the chair next to Tara.

And here she goes again, worrying everyone with her selfish behaviour.

"Oh yeah, it's nothing, just thinking about an assignment," Tara lied, almost convincing herself, too.

"Alright then, i'll leave you to it," Sam said, getting up, but before heading out of the kitchen, she stopped and turned to look at Tara's thoughtful expression and added "Tar, i love you, do you know that?"

'I know that and you should fucking stop loving me' is what Tara wants to scream at her but she decides to go with the safest answer.

"I love you too, Sam," and she does, Tara has never cared and loved anyone more than her sister.

But she doesn't deserve the same amount of love.

Tara should be begging Sam to love her.

Sam shouldn't love her that easily.

Tara doesn't tell Sam about the mess inside her head. She just keeps it to herself, because that's what she deserves.

Tara deserves to suffer.

Rot in her own pain.

Alone.

[bihansthot]

It’s been 7 years since we said goodbye, I opened TikTok tonight after midnight and the first video I saw played our song. I immediately lost it. Things haven’t gotten easier, I’ve just become more forgetful. Do you know I sniff Denny every night because I can’t remember what you smell like and I hope to get some scent memory from him? Do you know I take videos of him all the time because I don’t have any of you? I can’t remember what your bark sounded like, I can’t remember anything but seeing you laying on that metal table, your mouth taped open around the breathing tube just still as a board. I remember sobbing into your neck before the tech asked me to move so they could confirm you were no longer breathing. I remember staying with your lifeless body till I went numb, but I can’t remember how soft your fur was. I’m still broken, I’m still not ok and I don’t think I ever will be. You were so much more than “just a dog” as my shit bag brother put it, you were a once in a lifetime companion, my soulmate, my other half. You were the reason I got up every morning, the reason I looked after myself, the reason for my smile and no one can ever take your place. I miss you Jäger, I miss you so much I can’t breathe not just today but every day. I’ll never stop loving you my sweet baby boy, one day I hope I’ll see you again and remember everything about you again and finally feel whole. Rest in peace sweet boy. I love you.

[krikeymate]

Fictober 2023: Day 25: “Do I look like I knew that?” - Their mother comes around dropping bombshells. Fandom: Scream Rating: T Warnings: None.

➖

“Could this day get any worse?”

Sam should have known better.

It just slips out as she stares forlornly at the busted oven as it refuses to heat. The icing on top of the shitty cake of a day she’s had.

She only has a second to stare at their now never-to-be cooked dinner on the counter, before there’s a persistent knocking on their apartment door.

Sam tilts her head at her sister, a silent question. Tara replies with a shrug of her shoulders, and drops a screwdriver to the table, moving to answer it.

She doesn’t even have time for regrets as she hears a voice she’s never been able to forget, the sharp tone of their mother, every word laced with disappointment.

“Well, aren’t you going to say hello? When did you get so rude.”

Sam can’t say she’s ever missed it.

 She briefly considers throwing herself out the window before her sister calls out a wary “Sam.” Tara would never forgive her if she leaves her alone with that woman.

Again.

Oof.

Yeah, she’s still got a lot to make up for.

“What are you doing here?” she asks with the appropriate amount of hostility. Which is a lot.

Christina sneers.

“As pleasant as ever Samantha. What have you been teaching your sister?”

She tries not to grind her teeth. An impossible challenge.

“How do you know where we live?”

Tara sounds irritated, if not downright angry. Sam finds herself feeling guilty for the wave of relief that washes over her. Of course Tara didn’t tell her where they were. She knows her sister’s mad at their mother, that she left her behind and moved across the country to get away from her, but knowing and seeing are two different things.

Seeing Tara on her side never fails to make her heart stutter.

Their mother fails to answer that question too. That’s all she ever does, dance around and avoid, hide away.

She tries not to think about all the things they have in common.

“You weren’t answering any of my calls, so of course you made me drag myself down here. Wasting my time.”

Sam shares a look of disbelief with her sister. She tries not to smile as Tara rolls her eyes and mimes stabbing herself behind their mother’s back.

When Christina realises she’s not going to get a response from either of her daughters, she huffs and continues.

“Well, I’m just here to invite you to my wedding. I’m marrying your father, Tara, and he’s very interested in finally meeting you.”

Sam blinks at her, uncertain. She almost asks her to repeat herself, the words she heard were so insane they couldn’t possibly have been right.

Tara gets there first.

“What.”

Her sister is frowning and unamused and… oh, Sam knows that look.

She’s beginning to think she heard right in the first place.

“What the FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?”

She bites her lip. Tara’s still a little sensitive about her dad, though she tries to deny it. She can’t say she doesn’t understand, Sam’s still bitter too. Who raises a child for 13 years and decides they’re no longer their daughter in a single second?

“José got back with your crazy ass?” Sam exclaims in disbelief. No fucking way. This dude did not disappear for a goddamn decade and a half only to come crawling back. He can’t have.

“José?” Christina questions, thrown. “That deadbeat? Hardly. I’m talking about Tara’s father, Angel. He’s the proprietor of Castillo’s.”

Sam finds herself speechless. She begs herself to check on her sister, but she just can’t look away from the calm across her mother’s face.

How could she come back into their lives dropping bombshells like this?

Christina looks between her children, irked by their poor manners. The shock on their faces surprises her. “Oh, you didn’t know?”

“Do I look like I knew that?” Tara asks flatly, stepping away from them.

Watching her sister storm out the room, Sam wishes she could join her.

“I think it’s time for you to leave.”

She tries to sound forceful, but it comes out far too soft. She feels stuck in the clouds, watching everything happen from above.

“Honestly Samantha, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, Tara was hardly the brightest, but you...”

“Get out. Get OUT!”

[frozen-orbit]

My favorite lyrics from my Renegades playlists that i associate with Nodrian:

"Did you ever love me? Does it even matter?" - Say Goodbye, Katharine McPhee

"If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?" - Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol

"I’ll always be on your side, promise you." - Promise, Everglow

"Late night, watching television. But how'd we get in this position?" - I really like you, Carly Rae Jepsen

"Maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me." - Wonderwall, Oasis

"Paint my kiss across your chest. If you're the art, I'll be the brush." - Bad Liar, Selena Gómez

"We had trust, belief and friendship. Maybe something more, maybe something less." - Vengeance, coldrain

"Whether we’re together or apart, we can both remove the masks and admit we regret it from the start." - Over again, One Direction

"Why don't we save each other? Even though we couldn't save anything, let alone the world." - Howl, Chuu

From Nova's pov:

"An evening star watched from afar. It guided me here. It knew you'd be here." - I knew I loved you, Céline Dion

"Dream that makes me want to fall asleep again, such a sweet dream, that’s you." - Dream, Suzy feat. Baekhyun

"For the way you're something that I'd never choose, but at the same time, something I don't wanna lose." - Never knew I needed, Ne-Yo feat. Cassandra Steen

"I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown." - arms, Christina Perri

"I don't know who's gonna kiss you when I'm gone, so I'm gonna love you now like it's all I have. I know it'll kill me when it's over, I don't wanna think about it." - Love me now, John Legend

"If I kept you away from me, if I failed you and I left, it was because my lies scared me. You believed in me and I became so good at pretending." - Perdón, Camila

"I'll follow into the painting you create." - Lucid, LOOΠ∆ Odd Eye Circle

"I made you a promise with no way to keep it, but what kills me the most, I'd still do anything for you." - The Breaker, Little Big Town

"I'm on my guard for the rest of the world, but with you, I know it's no good." - Sparks fly, Taylor Swift

"I'm scared that I'll love you. I'm scared that I'll need you. I'm scared that I'll always want you close." - Something 4 U, Sam Addeo feat. Biyo

"I shot the stars out of your sky, took the love right from your eyes, and I did it all knowing you thought I was the hero of your heart." - The Breaker, Little Big Town

"I was used to being alone, my days were gray, but I remember the day you lightly came to me, knocking on my door. You shined on me like a light, woke me up from darkness, opened the closed door of my heart." - Starlight, Taeyeon feat. DEAN

"My mind forgets to remind me you're a bad idea." - Sparks fly, Taylor Swift

"Oh my God, I can't believe it. Out of all the people in the world, what is the likelihood of jumping out of my life and into your arms? Maybe, baby, I'm just losing my mind, 'cause this is trouble but it feels right. Teetering on the edge of Heaven and Hell is a battle that I cannot fight." - Oh My God, Adele

"She's the death you chose. You're in terrible danger." - The Albatross, Taylor Swift

"Some say she's such a fake, that her love is made up. No, no, no, no." - Girl Almighty, One Direction

"Sometimes I wonder, when you sleep, are you ever dreaming of me?" - Delicate, Taylor Swift

"The coat of paint that you had drawn on me will wash away." - Stop the rain, Day6

"The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me. Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?" - peace, Taylor Swift

"The devil that you know looks now more like an angel. I'm the life you chose and all this terrible danger." - The Albatross, Taylor Swift

"The more you become precious to me, the more afraid I am." - Eclipse, Got7

"There's nothing to pretend, I fell in love with you." - Me enamoré de ti, Chayanne

"The world I lived in has flipped over inside out because of you, right is left, left is right." - Sweet Chaos, Day6

"They tried to warn you about me." - The Albatross, Taylor Swift

"This ain't for the best. My reputation's never been worse, so you must like me for me." - Delicate, Taylor Swift

"Through the lies, you were the truth. My world is a better place because of you." - Because of you, Céline Dion

"When I look at you, I see forgiveness, I see the truth. You love me for who I am." - When I look at you, Miley Cyrus

"Wish I could tell you I still feel the same. I want you to know that it was never in vain. And that's the last thing that you'll hear me say." - Hear me say, Jonas Blue

"Wish that I would let you break my walls, but I'm still spinning out of control from the fall." - Oh My God, Adele

"You are the sunlight that rose again in my life, a reincarnation of my childhood dreams. I don't know what these emotions are. Am I still dreaming?" - Euphoria, BTS

From Adrian's pov:

"And you can aim for my heart, go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones." - my tears ricochet, Taylor Swift

"Even if time fades my paint, I will protect your dreamworld, I’ve never left." - Action figure, WayV

"I can save you and treat you preciously, and if you want I can ride a spaceship cross the night sky, pick the stars and place them in your hands." - Jasmine, DPR Live

"I closed my eyes to this evil. You hid your true colors until now." - Gunshot, K.A.R.D

"I could paint your beauty. That's if you just let me." - Jasmine, DPR Live

"I'd like to be a superhero and protect you against evil, gift you the Milky Way in a cereal bowl, take you to outer space and fly like Superman does." - Espacio sideral, Jesse & Joy

"I don't care how deep in the darkness you may be, I'll find my way to you, if you just wait for me." - Star maker, AmaLee

"I don't know what road you're gonna take this time, but let it be mine." - Let it be mine, Brett Young

"I draw your appearance every night without anyone knowing." - Why, Hwasa

"I guess it's still hard if the seed's sown, but do you really want to be alone?" - Over again, One Direction

"I insisted we begin at the start to turn us back into a work of art." - Oxford Blood, Autoheart

"I know you’re worried, you hide behind your walls. Oh trust me, little darlin’, you can let ‘em fall." - All the ways, The Secret Sisters feat. Ray LaMontagne

"I'll give you everything I can, I'll build your dreams with these two hands." - I swear, All-4-One

"I make art, but you're the masterpiece." - With You, SuperM

"I may be an ordinary guy with heart and soul, but if you're the one for me, then I'll be your hero." - Hero, Starstruck

"I start painting you and I don't pull it off. After slowly studying you, I end up thinking that over my palette I lack of intense colors that reflect your rare beauty." - Sólo pienso en ti, Miguel Bosé

"I want to draw you in the wide sky, name it after the stars." - ANL, NCT Dream

"I want to protect you who's sleeping next to me in this night." - Same dream, same night, same mind, Seventeen

"Like that star that stars in the night sky, tell me your mysterious story." - TokTok, GWSN

"Lips burrow so deep, give me good sleep." - You belong to me, Cat Pierce

"On the sketchbook of my brain, I draw you out every day." - Oh my!, Seventeen

"Put you in jail for something you didn't do. I pinned your hands behind your back. Thought I had reason to attack, but no." - Afterglow, Taylor Swift

"Stupid me still draws you in the air. A star called you shines in the pitch dark room." - HaPpY, Stray Kids

"We fight and you bait me. You feel so defiant. You used to save me but now I'm just frightened." - Keep dreaming, Neffex

"You don’t exist in front of me right now, I know that for sure, but I’m going to interrogate you. Your lips know the answer that I want." - Sherlock, Shinee

"You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same." - my tears ricochet, Taylor Swift

"You’re like a dream, so secretive, more than the entire universe." - Falling, Lim Kim

"You're the one I always dream of. Ev'ry line of your face is sketched so plain inside my heart." - You're the one, Carpenters

"You tried hiding another you but your evil was coming through." - Ghost, Ella Henderson

"You've got the most unbelievable blue eyes I've ever seen." - I love you always forever, Donna Lewis

[cafeleningrad]

You know what also harms the fairytales discussion? The idea that many confuse the concept of "fairy tale" with the concept of "fable",despite being two very different kind of story. Fable (in addition to being composed almost exclusively of animals) have the peculiarity of having a moral,but like,educative morals ala "don't talk tò strangers" etc. On the other hand, fairy tales .... do not have an educational purpose. They undoubtedly have themes, but they are mostly examples of very complex ideas that concern society (puberty, marriage, life, death). They are not educational, they are didactic (intended as: informative). To make matters worse, many people do not even know where real fairy tales begin/end. For example, the same "Farmhouse Tales" by Grimm are even too old for some scholars to be considered fairy tales (and in fact those by Andersen are not). I believe that this is partly caused by having removed the fairy tale from its oral dimension, causing it to lose its "ritual", but it is a somewhat complex issue (we can talk about it in private if you want). I don't know, tell me what you think

Oh definitely! 100% agreeing on this! The problem of packing fables together with fairy tales is created by publishers who put these different literary categories together in one book, and sell it under the label "bed time stories for children". Which reinforces the popular notion that fairy tales are meant to be didactic, even if only the fables are. Contemporary publishers definitely also are part of a general lack of engagement with this material they're publishing although it sells like hot cakes. They can definitely make easy work here: The general public already is fairly disengaged what fairy tales actually mean to children. The tests are already there, they just need to be rearragned and sold with new shiny covers. (Yes, I am polemic here. The literary industry is sometimes not very cultured.)

Even when you have the variations the Grimm edited for Kinder- und Hausmärchen in which they did add more Christina morality logic into some tales like Star Money, or the Girl without hands, in the total sum off all tales in the editions one end up with contradicting morals. The valiant little tailor or Puss in boots might teach cunning but not necessarily virtue or working for noble goals, like good Christian child should. I guess the moral of Rapunzel is to not steal your neighbors greens??? Don't make contracts with strange women at your local mill pond? Throw amphibia against the wall if you're in search of the perfect boyfriend? The Rose is nothing but a simple spook tale, so I guess I never leave the house again?

I'm being obtuse on purpose here but to stress your point, fairy tales are as singular stories incredibly varied in tone and subject matter. To say, when people generally talk about fairy tales, we talk about a very specific iteration of a literary category that is seen through a very specific variation of modern book publishing. However, as you perfectly pointed out, this is only one possibility, and on top an uncommon, relatively young possibility of spreading these stories in the history of fairy tales. In that sense, it's futile to bundle all Grimm tales together and trying to squeeze out a monomythic essence - because it doesn't exist. Logic, structure, tone, themes would contradict each other in variation. Examining single stories is much more fruitful. Not to mention that some fairy tales were more adventure or funny stories. In Russian fairy tales you do have some stories which are more an exercise in funny enumeration about people chasing sentient pancakes.

That's also not to forget that fables as well are not all made for children. La Fotaine fables were written for young Louis XIV yet held as subject matter the courtly life, and how to conduct in it. A reality only, daring assumption of mine, few modern children would live in. Hence some didactic teachings fall incredibly flat for today's children.

Oh yeah, the oral tradition is certainly a key element of these stories. Forgetting that these stories were for everyone, some even only for adults, creates a big discrepancy between the cultural importance of fairy tales (across cultures!!!), and the very weird distorted image of them. Something that sadly gets lost in most common flat retellings is the prosaic element that there is to them. The Grimms captured idioms and metpahors beautifully. Making fun of the incomprehensible gluttural mess that is Danish has become my favourite European past time since my last holiday however Andersen had a talent of capturing tone and emotion. Hauff definitely earned his criticism for his Orientalism big time still he created an entire idiomatic tapestry for magical stories set in Arabia in his life time.

Feel free to hit me up any time! :D I love this topic, partly because fairy tales are a very complex beast of literary history

[drusilla-carstairs]

oooh i love the clary dying theory but also idk would miss cc really do it? she loves clace i can’t see her killing one of of them and i honestly don’t think she’s going to kill any one the tmi gang just because she tends to avoid major character deaths like that (and also considering the economic factors of killing clary, i don’t think cc will do it because i definitely see her milking tmi gang shorts in the future AND there is that tendency of hers to end each series with a wedding…) REGARDLESS i love your thoughts that was genuinely so interesting!!!

unrelated but i have a theory that kieran will die in TWP. i feel like cc is foreshadowing it with him not loving being king and again, i think she goes for more convenient deaths. kieran’s death would be devastating but mark and christina would have each other and it would be a herongraystairs vibe

i could see one of the tmi gang members getting massively injured though. maybe jace or clary?

in the case that janus does take clary or whatever, i think it would really be interesting for cc to explore some of clary’s trauma there and how she may need some space from jace (considering him and janus look the same) and i think that could achieve the same objective of jace actively choosing to not be like janus because we know that his faith in himself is fully tied to the fact that clary thinks he is good. clary briefly needing space would break that foundation jace has and he would have to actively work on making himself and others believe that he is good

sorry that was complete word vomit!! i’m also searching for any twp crumbs 😭 the kickstarter books need to come asap but in the meantime i’m lurking in the tags and ask boxes! thank you 💗💗

sorry for taking so long to get to this, last week was busy, then I forgot this was in here rip

idk, there is a chance that she could kill Clary and bring her back (a nice symmetry with Jace in City of Glass), but honestly I think if she did kill Clary it would be permanent. I am not entirely sold that this will happen, I don't know Cassie's mind, but I think narratively it could make for good storytelling, you know? Same as when we all thought Matthew would like in The Last Hours. (She could also still end the series with a Sizzy wedding !)

The only thing holding me back from the idea that Kieran could die is that it would be too close to a "bury your gays" trope for CC. Yes, she has other queer characters, so it wouldn't be, but Keiran is 1/3 of the only poly relationship in TSC, and I don't think she would want to break that. Also Cristina and Mark are very different from herongraystairs, in my opinion, because it was never really a 'choice' with those three. I also think that Kieran getting to retire of his own free will would be a great end to his arc--whether this would mean Ash or Kit has to take his place, or Faerie works out a democracy, I don't have the slightest clue, but I do think that with a title like "The Last King of Faerie" Kieran will be stepping down and neither Ash nor Kit will step up.

I also think Janus kidnapping Clary would be interesting because it could so easily parallel her time kidnapped by Sebastian. It is good angst fodder for sure. I don't think this will happen in TWP though, because it is not focused on the TMI gang (something CC keeps reiterating, she does not want us to get our hopes up), and a plot like that would need a lot of time in Clary's POV. It could possibly happen in the last Eldest Curses novel, though, since that comes out between TWP books.

Don't apologize, I love getting asks !!! Even if I forget to answer them from time to time lol.

[homuraakemis]

My favorite Dark fanvids - Part 1

JONAS/MARTHA

Jonas & Martha | Bound for eternity. by HelenMand

Jonas & Martha - A Perfect Match by Irina Rusinova

(Dark) Martha & Jonas | silhouettes by Julies

Jonas & Martha | The Night We Met by GlamourStar0x

Dark | Netflix | Goodbye | Jonas and Martha by Forget It

Jonas and Martha // Dynasty (Dark S1,2,3) by Dacg

Losing game||Jonas🤍martha-arcade|DARK by JOYBOY

Flickers (Jonas/Martha - Dark) [Season 3] by briony

sweater weather - jonas & martha by micaela

martha & jonas - everything i wanted [dark] [s3] by Archiekins

Jonas & Martha • One way or another by sigyn27

jonas and martha | but we are the mistake by teamezria53098

Born To Die: Martha and Jonas || DARK [season 3] by Meha Stillmeya

Jonas & Martha - Familiar | Dark by CHET惡

Jonas & Martha | All the things she said by perspƎctive

Jonas and Martha| Six Feet Under by KBPRODUCTIONS

I'm only a fool for you || Jonas & Martha by Ceiwyn

Lovely || Martha and Jonas [S1-S2-S3-SPOILERS] by pau vala

Jonas e Martha - Nós ficamos perfeitos junto. Nunca duvide disso. by AA EDIT

(Dark) Jonas Kahnwald & Martha Nielsen || Remains by 𝐁.𝐊.𝐃 𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐓𝐒

Wicked Games - Jonas & Martha - Dark - Ursine Vulpine ft. Annaca by whiterose87

The Labyrinth Song [Dark, Jonas/Martha] by falafelfilms1

Jonas & Martha - Adam & Eve | Tribute video | Dark | Tv Show | Channel K Square Tribute by Night King

Jonas and Martha by Arafat Malitha

Jonas x Martha | Dark | Daylight by StrangeOrange

jonas and martha edit - fine line by ancie

Dark - Me and the Devil | Martha and Jonas by Mani Rathnam

Jonas & Martha - Hold On | Dark by nupur

Jonas & Martha - Dark edit by valeoftear

jonas and martha edit // bloodstream by voidemons

Jonas X Martha - Without Me [Dark Netflix] by Metefizique

Jonas & Martha [ Dark ] || Surrender [ + S3 ] ( sub eng + sub ita) by DreamSara1

Jonas and martha/ Another love/ Moonlight by Moonlight

ADAM & EVA || time to say goodbye || DARK S3 SPOILERS by Zuxinha

Jonas & Martha | Surrender | Dark | S3 by sararufus

Jonas & Martha - Get You The Moon by Evan Haze

Jonas & Martha | Let me down slowly by movsrimus

Martha & Jonas 8 by Projeto NEXUS

Jonas ❤ Martha - Back To You [AMV] || Dark || @v3gen3666 by V3 GEN

A Thousand Years | Dark | Jonas & Martha | Twilight | Christina Perri by Cupful

Dark: Jonas & Martha - Lovely by D P A

Jonas and Martha (Dark) - My Immortal by Cerine Sp

Jonas + Martha | Dynasty by Martina Benedetti

Jonas and Martha- Take me to church by mikasa_braun edits

Jonas & Martha / Where's My Love by alexbarrioz

martha & jonas | we're not a good match. by ultraangst

Make you mine | Jonas and Martha #dark #jonas #martha#preset by Perman

Jonas & Martha [ Dark ] - Let Me Down Slowly - Alec Benjamin by R U B A I T H

#DARK⚫#Jonas⚪#Marta⚫#Adam⚪#Eva📀Final series, the Dark Eva and Adam best moments/🎶Take Me to Church by GOLDEN MUSIC TV ოქროსფერი TV

Jonas and Martha Dark | Rewrite the stars ✨ by Notion Spell

DARK -Jonas and Martha | Into your Arms | Ava Max by Grinchy Guy

Dark | into your arms | Jonas & Martha #dark #intoyourarms by Mohamed Fayaz

Ed Sheeran - Perfect, Martha & Jonas (Sub. Español) Dark. by minasooul

Martha & Jonas || Falling by elei

Jonas x Martha || We Could Leave by elei

Jonas + Martha (but it's a rom-com) || Dead or Alive – You Spin Me Round by Stranger

Jonas And Martha - Perfect Match by Magic Official Channel

Jonas and Martha || Playing love by Tatiana Marano Edits

Martha X Jonas♥️| dark love story | HEART CANDY by Thangavel K

Martha and Jonas - Can You Feel My Heart by Well Edits

Jonas & Martha | You are a memory by Hanxa

jonas&martha / a glitch in the matrix (their story) by PerfectLife

jonas & martha | a glitch in the matrix [s3] by Delena Fan Girl

My Love Will Never Die | Claire Wyndham | Jonas & Martha | DARK NETFLIX | Lucifer | by SRK TUBE

jonas&martha - i found love where it wasn't supposed to be - dark by Anna Clara Aquino

Jonas & Martha︱Lovestory︱Dark Netflix by TrailerGen

Ghost in the Machine - Jonas&Martha by lilitifrock

Dark | Jonas & Martha | Perfect Match by Farid Pasha

Dark | Jonas & Martha | We're a Perfect Match (Music Video) by M.G.

NF - If you want love // JONAS & MARTHA (Dark) by Sarthac

Martha&Jonas | Remember To Remember Me by LibertyInfinity

Martha & Jonas - The Birds by shoxbroken

Together we'll be running somewhere new... ? by Lou Nyx

I Don't Deserve You (Jonas & Martha) by Chloi Manon

jonas & martha | lost on you (Türkçe Çeviri) by liv

DARK: Jonas & Martha || A Glitch in The Matrix by Malati Di The Walking Dead

Jonas & Martha | A glitch in a matrix (DARK) by Earwen

Jonas & Martha X Yellow. whatsapp status by Editplus15

D A R K ||Jonas & Martha|| Love💕|Webseries| by Baby bear💞🐻

Jonas & Martha: Die With You by FairyCutie86

DARK || Martha + Jonas || So Fern, So Nah by Cryss

𝕯𝖆𝖗𝖐 𝖜𝖍𝖆𝖙𝖘𝖆𝖕𝖕 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖙𝖚𝖘 ∣ 𝖏𝖔𝖓𝖆𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖍𝖆 ∣ 𝖓𝖊𝖙𝖋𝖑𝖎𝖝 by Alan

DARK | A Glitch in the Matrix by inferno92000

Martha and Jonas/ Dark/ Angel Koda Lyrics Sub Español by Random ML&CV

Jonas and Martha || Dark Netflix by Galaxy Edits

Jonas and Martha || Dark Netflix || #shorts #new #news #newstatus #whatsappstatus #whatsapp by Galaxy Edits

Night We Met || DARK by Skaotic Edits

Jonas and Martha || Always Remember Us This Way || by Wantit T.V

DARK You and I are perfect for each other. Never believe anything else by UCHIHA ITACHI

Jonas and Martha/Secrets by Isombard

Jonas and Martha • Nobody Like You • Dark by EditionMix

'∞' Dark Series Netflix - In the end by BlendSk Mix

Jonas & Martha - Wir Sind Falsch (Dark Netflix Series) by DAN

Ready to Start (Jonas/Martha - Dark) by briony

Adam and Eva : Jonas and Martha Dark season 3 ft Electric love by detheditz

Jonas and Martha | Adam and Eve by Keshav Kashyap

DARK OPENING THEME SONG | good bye whatsapp status | true love whatsapp status | Netflix series by vlovely_ videos

DARK , Season - 3 (Jonas and Martha❤️) by Nikhil S

❤Jonas and Martha❤~|●Dark●|Best WhatsApp Status by Mojo Hub

//whatever happened to the young, young lovers.

[namonaki-pharaoh]

Happy New Year 2025

I wanna share a post from Christina Aguilera which really resonates with me and we all can take something away from.

Be grateful for what you have and another year spent on this earth.

Every year is a blessing and should be recognized for all you've accomplished.

Cherish the ones you love.

Dont let them forget it.

Hold tight and honor what truly matters.

Dont lose yourself in someone else.

Be true to yourself first and foremost.

Be the lesson you want to receive.

And receive the lesson you resist.

Recognize your growth and set new sights for the future.

You are never alone.

You are never done.

Nothing can defeat you.

You were born to survive and thrive through anything life throws your way.

Life is an ebb & flow.

Ride the hard times out.

We are meant to learn and evolve into the next version of ourselves.

Don't live in the future.

Don't dwell on the past.

Be in the present.

Feel what you do.

But allow yourself to let it go.

Move through the pain.

Mourn your losses

Value the gain.

And always embrace...

Change.

—— Christina Aguilera