#We make up for living somewhere with very little restaurant variety

[thesaltyace]

We!! Made!! Shawarma!!

At!! Home!!

And!!

Toum!!

And then we bastardized it by using corn tortillas instead of flatbread bc we had some that needed to be used up. But tbh IT SLAPPED. Just added some romaine lettuce for crunch and it made the perfect dinner. 😋

[intheshadowsbehindyou]

Hello! I was wondering if you could write about the Merc's with a gn! reader who loves baking?

Btw, I love your writing style! It all feels so accurate and it's helping to feed this new fixation of mine <3 <3

I see we have some food lovers in the askbox, chat. *crackles knuckles* you ask, and daddy delivers.

Mercs with somebody who gives them food

Scout:

- Depends on your current location. The gravel wars isn’t short of moving from place to place. If it’s somewhere like japan he’ll go full weeb mode and eat nothing but fish related dishes. You know speed racer? In the fucked up TF2 universe there’s a speed racer themed restaurant. Take him there. (On second thought maybe don’t go eating with him in Japan he might eat the Hiroshima rocks.)

- He swears he’s on a diet but it’s inconsistent as fuck. This is the same guy who canonically eats radiation we’re talking about here. You hand him some warm bread you baked and he’s ecstatic. You catch him sprinkling something on his slice. It’s grounded up like pepper. He’s like “This? This shit is fuckin’ perfect. The person who owns my gym back in boston recommended it for energy. Tastes great.” You read the label and you realize it’s grounded up uranium.

- If you make him homemade fried chicken he’ll nearly choke up. Seriously. nobody’s ever done that for him before. Giving him food in general is also his love language but chicken? He thinks you want to marry him forever and ever now.

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Soldier:

- You don’t really know what soldier likes.. He doesn’t make anything very evident and tries his hardest to make his one defining trait being that he’s a veteran. But you know that’s not true. You decide to make him some sandwiches and he’s confused. “Huh.. Well that’s some weird tasting MREs. Not complaining. It’s actually really good. Shame that civilians can’t get the same luxury right now.” He says. You have no idea how to explain that WW2 is virtually nonexistent anymore.

- Finally you settle with something. Honey with warm bread. Instead of eating slices like a normal person he just swallows the entire loaf like a snake. You are worried for this man’s intestines. He seems to be fine however.

- Gives you either a romantic or platonic kiss on the head. Your pick. His breath smells sugary and sweet and you nuzzle your head against his collarbone in response. This is his way of showing he appreciated the food.

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Demoman:

- I sure hope you’re capable of producing stew because that’s all he eats when he isn’t unhealthily suppressing his own hunger with scrumpy.

- You get him to eat a variety of food somehow. Although he’s picky, he isn’t impossible either. Due to growing up in an orphanage he was no stranger to having to cook for himself at times when the caretakers just really didn’t care. You exchange recipes. For some reason he has an entire Scottish cookbook under his bed. As well as a book on “Leonerdo Da Fuq’s Basic Guide To blowing Sentries Up. And making it look like an accident.”

- He’s very thankful. Demoman’s not much of a foodie. He eats to live rather than lives to eat. But your snacks hit different. They’re made with your love. That’s why they’re so much better than what he typically eats.

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Engineer:

- WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU THATS HIS JOB. HE’S THE OVERBEARING GRANDMOTHER THAT WONT STOP SHOVING FOOD INTO HER KIDS MOUTH!!! NOT YOU!!!

- He eats everything you give him. Even if it doesn’t particularly tickle his fancy. His belly is big and swollen afterwards and you want to squish him so bad. That’s a pillow waiting to be laid on. He then tells you fond memories of thanksgiving and when his mother would cook his family an entire turkey dinner.

- He responds twofold by making you something as well. You wake up one day to find an entire breakfast platter laid on your end table. There’s a little sticky note there and although it doesn’t have a name on it — the dash alongside the expertly drawn symbol of his class is evident enough. Only somebody with expertise in blueprints would draw something like that. Hint hint.

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Heavy:

- Heavy isn’t a dumbass by any means but this is a certified Heavy L situation. He thinks you’re trying to offend him at first because people call him fat on a regular basis. Medic explains from afar that actually it’s a gesture meant to express hospitality, and upon realizing you were just being nice he looks embarrassed and rubs the back of his neck.

- Lets you spoon feed him your food. He likes it for some reason. He likes any kind of meat, and protein. He eats that shit everyday. Not just that but dark chocolate and other bitter tasting foods as well. Despite his massive size he doesn’t actually eat large portions at a time.

- He knows how to make mostly deserts. Takes on a sort of mentor role and tries to teach you how to bake cakes and stuff like that. You’ve never seen Heavy in such a domesticated setting. Watching him go about cooking without breaking somebody’s skull in for once was actually kind of surreal.

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Pyro:

- Cook / get them nothing but sweets. They won’t eat anything else. You begin to wonder if Pyro is even remotely human because of how much unhealthy food they eat. (But then again you’ve seen soldier survive losing both his arms and Medic sowing them back on. It’s probably fine.)

- They are unbelievably excited to see you walk into the room with plates and/or boxes. You’ve unintentionally pavloved them into associating it with your food. They clap and make grabby hands. Wanting to see what sweets you’ve brought them.

- It’s actually quite odd.. You see them retreat into their quarters to eat their food. It’s clear they’ve eaten it because they always take the plates back but you’re never allowed to see them eat directly. They don’t attend dinner with the other mercs or even breakfast.

- DO NOT LET THEM NEAR THE FUCKING OVEN. DO NOT LET THEM COOK. THE ADMINISTRATOR MADE IT AGAINST THE RULES TO LET PYRO NEAR THE STOVE.

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Sniper:

- “Bloody hell.. This for me?” His voice hiked up a little. A little shocked that somebody would even consider making or buying him food in the first place, Only his parents ever did that for him. He takes it hesitantly but his expression doesn’t seem negative. Just incredibly dumbfounded. You had got him some donuts from a market in tuefort. You figured it would go well with his coffee.

- Immediately starts eating them. Sniper is both a meats sort of guy and a sweets sort of guy. Looks from side to side to make sure nobody saw him take your offer. That would be a embarrassing. He grabs the entire box and retreats into his camper van like a rat.

- He then slowly opens the door.. “Oh, right. Bugger. This is typically the moment I comfortably invite you in.” He cringes at the thought. Leaving the door open for you, and moving aside to let you in. He begins telling you the basics about how to hunt your food. For some reason it’s all incredibly dangerous aussie animals though. Some of the stuff doesn’t sound edible but he’s apparently eaten. He’s especially passionate about how to properly cook crocodiles.

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Medic:

- Pretentiously nitpicks the fact you brought him cupcakes. Citing his knowledge about how too much sugar consumption can kill you… whilst simultaneously eating the cupcakes.

- “Even worse yet —- they ruin your dental health. Hoo, i’d hate to be on the receiving end of a tooth filling by an angry dentist.” He says, shoving more of your sweets into his face. You wonder if he’s even self aware of what he’s doing to be honest. “Although I do envy their sadism! It’s much worse than mine, actually — Das schmeckt gut.” He adds.

- He frowns. You knew Medic had loved cupcakes in particular so you were confused at first. Well it wasn’t that. In fact it was something more stupid. “Well then again the consumption of sugar is important for our bodies, I must add. With the wrong diet we could die from low blood sugar. I wonder if it is possible to extract all the sugar from a human body using a sort of giant homebrewed syringe. It is in theory possible for me to—“ The man is at his chalkboard writing down mathematical equations again.

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Spy:

- When you give him food for the first time he’s unbelievably pouty. Couldn’t you have asked him his tastes first? He hesitantly eats what you give him anyway. As long as it isn’t fried, fast food, candy or anything that wasn’t expensive as fuck.

- Incredibly good table manners. Incredibly good at cooking his native cuisine. For some reason he’s intent on insisting that french food is superior than any other food. When you’re eating with him he straightens your posture, politely puts your napkin in your lap and schools you on the fact you’re not using your salad fork or whatever. There’s way too much pointless shit on his table. Who the fuck created all these weirdly specific rules?

- Eventually he’s so tired from trying to teach you he loses his temper and crosses his arms like a discontent toddler while you eat nonchalantly. “What?” You say. Using the wrong fork again. He’s still staring at you. “What?!” You repeat yourself. “I love you, Spy.” You say. Shoving more food into your mouth. He keeps glaring at you.

[jasminebutintaiwansojiemin]

July 30th, 2024 星期二 - Hiking Monkey Mountain, Art Museums, Rock Pizza but not Dwayne the Rock Johnson Pizza

For some odd reason, I decided to climb a mountain full of monkeys today. It was very cute seeing all the monkeys and their babies, but never again. I literally slept MAX three hours the night before and woke up to get some fruit before meeting to go on the hike. I swear I’ve been telling people this whole time that some fruits have worms in them and everyone was like nooooooooooooo but I quite literally found SO MANY worms in the dragonfruit at the hotel breakfast. We eventually headed out and took an above ground train closer to the mountain.

Climbing that mountain made me wanna helicopter home to the U.S. BUT I powered through and it was a good experience. It was very very very hot and a lot of the ground was muddy but it was worth it seeing all the cute little monkeys. So many had babies and I even say a few moms that had twin babies. The little noises they make are so cute and I had to avoid getting bonked on the head by a few monkeys who were sitting in trees and throwing fruit down. I did also see a monkey absolutely yoink someone’s food from them and unwrap the plastic with its little fingers. Throughout our hike, we got a lot of help from older Taiwanese people who were also hiking. They were super sweet and even took pictures of us. Also the view of Kaohsiung from the highest point we went to was pretty cool. The descent of the mountain was LONG but less dangerous than the route we took for the ascent. As soon as we got off the mountain we hit up at 7/11 and I bought a Melona popsicle. I devoured that think in the minutes tops. Then we took the train home where I showered and changed for class.

Our first stop for class was a fine arts museum. It had 5 floors and was full of many different types of art, from sculptures to paintings, to even a live art session. I inserted a few of my favorite art pieces from that museum. One of the ones I liked the most was the painting of the Chinese style doors with the talisman papers on the front. When I saw it, I immediately thought of whether it was meant to represent somewhere in Taiwan, or maybe the feeling of being an outsider to the majority of Chinese culture as a Taiwanese person. After the fine arts museum, we headed to a contemporary art museum. This museum was much more modern and contained art of non-Taiwanese and Taiwanese artists alike. There were a lot of pieces that utilized aluminum and glass work to express their art. This museum also contained a really cool cafe that I saw quite a few people working in—though I’m intrigued on whether they paid to get into the museum just to go to the cafe lol.

After this museum I went home and took a nap for a few hours. Upon awakening I headed to a pizza place nearby for a taste of home. I, of course, ordered a pepperoni pineapple pizza and ginger ale. It was a pretty good pizza and reminded me of Blaze pizza in a way. After dinner some of us took a stroll across the pier to look at the water. Then we switched and explored the city side, where I found a stationary store! We looked around there for a bit and it was so cute! I definitely will head back there tomorrow since it’s open until 10 pm. Then I headed home and knocked out.

Academic Reflection

For today, I initially decided to do some research on the prevalence of American restaurant chains in Taiwan. When we were in Taipei, I noticed the heavy prevalence of the most random U.S. chains—such as Starbucks, McDonalds, Pizza Hut, Burger King, Subway, TGI Fridays, Texas Roadhouse, and the omnipresent 7/11 convenience stores. However, I realized that there are actually quite a few Taiwanese chains that we have back in America.

One chain is Happy Lemon. I didn’t even realize this was Taiwanese until I saw one whilst driving down the street today. This type of restaurant serves boba tea and a wide variety of bubble waffles. I remember when it opened in Orlando, it was one of the first of its kind. Here in Taiwan however, I see bubble waffle shops everywhere, from actual store front to stalls at night markets. Happy Lemon opened in 2006, and by 2014 was deemed the world’s most recognized and respected tea culture brand. They accredit themselves with “bringing an expanding the tea culture to Mainland China and Hong Kong” as “elite pioneers”. They have over 350+ stores in places such as the U.S., Canada, the U.K., Dubai, and the Philippines. Through my research, I found out that they apparently created the cheese foam topping for boba tea, which is honestly a really popular topping even in the States. I thought this was interesting because not only did I not know that Happy Lemon even sold tea, I also didn’t know they pioneered so many staples of modern bubble tea.

[ayearwithoutwater]

Eighteen.

When I lived in the East Village, I shared an apartment with Yin, my then-best friend, who I'd known since our freshman year in college. We had attended the same program within our university—an interdisciplinary curriculum with an emphasis on individualized education—and virtually came of age together.

We met at a small party during spring break of 2012, but didn't hit it off right away. I remember finding her to be reserved, quiet and less easily amiable as her other Hong Kong friend, who was also in attendance. But, repeated hangouts did the trick, as we were all newcomers to New York without any local anchors, and I soon found myself spending all of my time with her. In Yin, I found a kindred spirit, familiarly foreign because we were ethnically and homosexually similar yet of different varieties: I was a gay boy from Los Angeles; she was a lesbian from Hong Kong.

I was deeply fascinated by her. She was my introduction to Grimes and Beach House and all the music that I'd never before heard, and she always knew what to order at the Japanese restaurants we began to frequent. She was rebelliously independent, whether attending underground concerts somewhere out in Brooklyn or reading philosophers (Freud was her favorite) and modern culture critics that laid out all the possible ways that the world not just was, but could be. Of all my peers, she was the one who had the most formidable impact on my intellectual development, introducing me to Judith Butler and Jasbir Puar before even my professors did. To me, she was effortlessly cool.

I think I was annoying. Part of why I chose to attend college in New York was that I wanted to escape my parents, and the core of that logic is that I wanted a chance to find out who I was without external controls. Practicing independence meant living without having parental figures nearby to whom I could run if anything went wrong, and college was a safety net there for me if ever my mistakes led me awry. Still, I felt the weight of my choices, and I desperately craved that gravity because I wanted to grow up a little bit faster, because I'd spent my teenage years in a bubble of a suburb of Los Angeles, where I was incubated for college acceptances and nothing else. Attending a magnet high school resulted in me feeling anything but normal, and I knew that I needed to be properly socialized. I think I was annoying because I'd spent six years of my life in a school where it felt like all we were allowed to care about was studying hard and getting good grades—which are, yes, important, but still I felt stifled, surrounded by all the academic excellence and geniuses against whom I didn't match up. Thus, when I met Yin, I was still trying to figure out how to behave.

She was my best friend. I didn't make any decisions without first consulting her. I imagined that that was how normal people relied upon their siblings; I imagined that she was sort of my (dizygotic) twin. Within the same year that we'd met, it was in her kitchen where I was sat when I began the fraught, tentative negotiations that precipitate first-time dating as I was wooed by the man who would become my very first boyfriend. (She advised me on my every response; my then-boyfriend later told me he'd wondered, as my messages lagged, "Why is he taking so long to reply?") We purchased cheap Rieslings and spirits, mixed bad homemade sangria, and spent night after night playing mahjong and billiards together.

Through Yin, I became acquainted with Hong Kong. She and her friends regaled me with stories from their times as students at a girls' school, growing up in one of the world's densest metropolises. Over winter break, I accompanied them back to their city, which I came to see through their eyes. (For the briefest of moments, I was a neighbor of Jackie Chan.) With them, I ate true Cantonese-style dim sum, I scaled Victoria Peak, and I marveled at the efficiencies of their subway compared to New York's. I'd technically traveled the world with her, and that made me trust her all the more.

Yin was one of the few people I relied upon during my first breakup. Though our friendship had lulled around that time, we reconnected over my loss, the end of the relationship that she'd helped me to foster. Though I didn't know how to process such a loss, she dragged me out of my stupor and forced me to interact with the world, to continue on with life; the precedents she set for me during that first breakup have since become weighty and constitutive.

I think that I trusted her so much because our formative experiences were so intertwined. After she moved out of the dormitories into her own apartment, I spent all of my free time there. I knew all her doormen; I would walk in without having to announce myself, and I'd irritate her to no end by commandeering the aux cord to her stereo system so that I could play Carly Rae Jepsen songs on repeat. I would pick through her jewelry until I found the thick silver band that I always borrowed. (After our separation, I would later take myself up to the Diamond District, where I purchased one in tribute to hers that I now customarily wear exclusively on my fourth finger.) Where she was laconic, I was loquacious, and every Thursday evening after class I invited myself over just to invite her outside. She would say that she wanted to stay in, but within the hour we'd find ourselves doing pickleback shots until we had enough liquid courage to venture out to the West Village.

The West Village was where we spent most of our free nights for two reasons: proximity and queerness. It was our entry point to another world, one that compulsory heterosexuality did not dominate, and crossing Sixth Avenue those evenings felt like entering another dimension through a nondescript portal unnoticed by most. I always accompanied her to the Hot Rabbit parties at Monster at the end of each week, and I always made her accompany me to the drag shows at Boots & Saddle where we knew Yuhua Hamasaki (pre-RuPaul's Drag Race) performed. (A decade later, Yuhua was hired by my company to give a talk on diversity, and I afterwards went up to her to reminisce about the days in which Yuhua and Yin would amiably cuss at each other in Cantonese almost every week.) I would go to Cubbyhole and Henrietta Hudson with her, where I imagined she'd meet some hot lesbian and where I invariably was the one doing the hooking up, tipsily making out with a cute bisexual Latvian man who claimed to walk Mariah Carey's dogs on one such occasion (Facebook later informed me that he's since happily become a father with a woman).

When we graduated, I sat next to her in the stands at Yankee Stadium. After the graduation ceremony, it seemed as though everyone else already had plans or places to be; she and I stood awkwardly outside the stadium with our parents before we ultimately decided to take the 4 train back down to a restaurant in Chinatown. Our parents quarreled in good nature over who had the honor of paying the dinner bill; I think my mom allowed herself to lose. I think my mom thought she was my girlfriend, a notion I did no work to dispel because I hadn't yet come out to my parents.

In 2015, the lease on my Lower East Side apartment lapsed, and we decided to move in together. I would later come to view that year as one of my happiest, despite it being the year where it all went wrong.

We found a newly remodeled two-bedroom apartment on 7th Street, and I negotiated down the rent by a whopping fifty dollars per month for us. We hosted our first Friendsgiving, and my second boyfriend cooked a turkey. Indeed, between him virtually living with us and her other best friend, a photographer who'd also gone to college with us, being a constant presence, it felt like we had established our own happy family. I was there when she came out to her brother, whose response—"Now we both have something in common!"—I still remember because it cracked us up, because we were each nursing pints of beer at a Japanese gastropub, because we wondered whether he was gay too. ("We both like girls," he'd finished his sentence, after an agonizingly long pause.)

I'm choosing to gloss over our falling out because I don't like to remember it. I don't like to remember the icing each other out, the acrimonious text messages, and what I did in the fallout of losing my best friend. I felt betrayed, so I in turn betrayed her, and it's a chasm that will never be bridged.

In the years since, I've never met anyone that could so capably encapsulate in one person all that she was to me. It's entirely reasonable that I haven't, that I won't—if every individual is a universe, the void she left in my life was bigger than any that could be engendered by even a supermassive black hole. There have been people who have taken up the burden of shouldering bits and pieces of the weight she carried, but that only illustrates the point all the more: no one could, would, should replace her. She was one of my everythings, and now I'm one everything short.

Yin had been with me through my first two successive boyfriends. She'd seen my evolution from an awkward teenager to a self-assured young adult; indeed, she was disproportionately responsible for it. As I later processed my worst breakup ever during my year without water, I wondered to my therapist whether her disappearance was my original loss, the big one from which all my later grief stemmed, and whether my lack of having processed that loss was contributing to my continued state of emotional decline. I'd never properly mourned her, you see. When she left my life, I obstinately remained angry until my anger no longer mattered, and when that finally happened my life became preoccupied with other matters. I never had the time to grieve. As I missed the ex-boyfriend who'd so willingly and determinedly walked out of my life, so too did I find myself missing her.

Wherever she is now, I hope she's happy. I'm sorry for the way things ended between us, and I do wish they had never taken place, and I wonder what restitutions could even be made now, when it all is no longer significant. I've since chosen to interpret her parting as her final, ultimate life lesson for me: to not take anyone for granted, to not let a relationship get so bad that it becomes beyond repair, and to let my loved ones know, over and over, that they are loved. It is a weight that I, myself, will forever shoulder.

[marryabroadsimply]

Getting Married in Gibraltar in 2024

Gibraltar is always such a special venue that everyone loves..  Renowned throughout the world as a wonderful place for people to marry quickly and easily.  As the marriages are non religious legally binding civil ceremonies that are recognised all over the world it is a wonderful location for all religions, situations, sexuality, and requirements.  You need only stay 36 hours - just enough time to present your documents and then marry. No wonder  it now attracts international and foreign couples from around the world to marry abroad easily, and each day throughout the year people for all corners of the globe are married in these amazing surroundings. If there is space & availability we can organise you a wedding very quickly - within days weeks, although usually for a registry office wedding you need at least 4-6 weeks leadtime. For a speciality wedding there is usually more availability and the registrars are available weekends and evenings. So if you want a Saturday wedding then Speciality is going to be your best option. Mondays in the registry office have best availability as the document presentation is the business day before (the Friday). So for best chance of a fast wedding, if that is what you need, do see if you can make your travel plans work for a long weekend, arrive Thursday night and marry on the Monday. And if you use your time wisely that is all you need you see, hear and make enough memories to last a life time! Have a look at the awesome Welcome to Gibraltar or  Gibraltar Tourist board sites for some great ideas of things to do whilst you are there. The country is part of the UK but on the Southern Spanish border. You can fly directly into Gibraltar (interesting fact that our own Leanne's Dad was in charge of rebuilding the runway a few years ago so think of us when you fly in and land safely!). You can also fly directly into Malaga and there is a bus service that leaves regularly to take you to La Linea - which is the Spanish border town of Malaga and it is a 3 minute walk from La Linea into Gibraltar over the walking land border. Or you can very easily drive from Malaga, it is quite often a fraction of the cost to fly into Spain and drive or get a bus to Gibraltar. The weather is tropical and warm all year round as you would imagine from Southern Spain, and it is nice to see Palm Trees and such greenery with tropical plants and flowers. The language spoken is English, but there is a very strong Spanish influence, so it is the best of both worlds with culture, fusions, food, and language. Monkeys are a big part of Gibraltar as they roam freely, and you have got to keep your balcony door closed when staying at The Rock Hotel as they are known to pop in and steal any snacks you have left laying around. Take a cable car up to Mons Calpe and you can see and hold the monkeys yourself. Chill out in the square that is Casemates and have a sangria and some fish n chips for a real UK meets Spain experience! If you like seafood you are spoilt for choice with options as of course Gibraltar is right on the sea! But the locals all head to The Ocean Restaurant For those who are pure carnivores have a look at Gaucho's, where the steaks and sides are really impressive, and it has an awesome atmospheric interior which is a bit like a cave, and there is a really sweet courtyard. If Spice is your thing the place to head is Little Bay, which is famous in Gibraltar for Curries, Cocktails and Spanish/Indian Tapas. This restaurant is also a really firm favourite recommendation from many of our Vegan couples as somewhere to try as there is a wide variety of really nice vegan dishes.

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Why do we personally love Gibraltar so much? Well Leanne's family lived there for many years so she has strong connections anyway, but in addition...

You have the romanticism of John Lennon and Yoko Ono, maybe the greatest love story.

You have the wonderful geographical location, its the UK but its hot! 

You have the amazing registry office where thousands have wed.  You are always welcome, same sex, mixed religion, whatever your situation -  Gibraltar is all about the love and one of the easiest, nicest and best places to get married in the world.

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You have all the external venues, be it a cave or a hotel or a restaurant or a yacht there are 18 venues to choose from. They are all very different with regards to minimum spend for a booking, maximum or minimum guests, availability, length of time for the booking - so we will narrow down and advise the best options for you. 

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Gibraltar and the whole wedding team thrive off marrying people, and every year Gibraltar becomes more and more popular. There are lots more apartments to rent, and the wonderful Caleta hotel is currently under refurbishment and we eagerly await news of its re-opening.

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So how do we get married in Gibraltar?  The process (as with getting married in Denmark) is simple and stress free (especially as we will do ALL of it for you!) as we take all of the official stress, documents and booking headache away from you as your expert wedding planners in Gibraltar.  As there are so many different ways to marry in Gibraltar we have adapted our services to suit... 

Registry Office

This ceremony is a wonderful simply ceremony in the glorious ceremony room at the registry office, there are multiple appointments here every weekday and you will marry in the cool, calm room away from Main Street with the registrar, guests and witnesses. This is with our "Everything Gibraltar" service that is €795

External Ceremony registrar only

If you are staying at a hotel in Gibraltar or planning a meal or reception in one of the hotels and restaurants that offer a wedding package that you can incorporate in your stay on "The Rock' you can take this option. We will arrange the documents, license, notary, paperwork and the registrar, and we will just let them know where to be at what time, at that point we hand over all the other arrangements to the hotel/restaurant as they are the experts and will ensure that you have everything that you need!

External Ceremony

For some external ceremonies you only need to hire the space for an hour, for example the wonderful Botanical gardens.  In these instances we will arrange the registrar to be there, we will arrange the venue that they are booked and confirmed and all of this is included in the fee. So you can have a wedding in one of these wonderful locations, they are €1495 which includes the venue, registrar, license, documents, booking, marriage certificates. You just turn up at your chosen location and marry! We can also organise you the witnesses if you need.

Please take a look at our other blogs for external venues;

The Rock Hotel

The Mons Calpe Suite

The Botanical Gardens

For all of these services we will of course look after all the documentation, liaise with the registry office, book and confirm your ceremony, your document presentation and arrange for you to sign the affidavits at the notarial office.

Gibraltar is a great location to look at marrying abroad all year round, and 2024 is set to be an incredible year to get married in Gibraltar!

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Let us help you on this journey, you can be assured that we will follow you through the whole process, and we won't stop until you are married, we will hold you hand and take you through the process, and we have a wonderful concierge service after support to help you organise anything else you would like, from hair and make up to photographers, and tips on trips, hotels and restaurants. All you need to marry in Gibraltar are your original long version birth certificates, and if you have been married before then we also need to document that.  That is all!

And you know that in Gibraltar you can also get a civil partnership as well as a marriage ensuring that all couples have the choice to be able to choose the right option for them.

We are happy to provide advice and a free no obligation documents list of which documents you will require to get married in Denmark or Get married in Gibraltar – just contact us on any of the methods below. We are experts in all documents and situations, so if you are a foreign or international couple, and you are concerned your case may be complicated then we are the best agency in Denmark for you. Have a look at our awesome YouTube channel for short information Vlogs on how easy it is to elope and get married abroad!

Or check out our podcast on Spotify!

You can easily contact us by clicking here or by e-mail at interest@marryabroadsimply.com or call us on +447934933356 or what’s app +447934 933486

[sigmaleph]

@serinemolecule asked me for hot takes on this 2006 article on Argentinian food, which I am now reorganising into a proper post for y'all's consumption. you're welcome.

First of all: the titular thesis that you should eat two steaks a day. I am forced to clarify that as 'should's go you should eat zero steaks a day, but this is ethical rather dietary advice and I don't follow it as well as I should, so, y'know. I would engage with this on the level it was stated, but I actually have no opinion on it. Moving on...

Argentine beef really is extraordinary. Almost all of this has to do with how the cows are raised. There are no factory feedlots in Argentina; the animals still eat pampas grass their whole lives, in open pasture, and not the chicken droppings and feathers mixed with corn that pass for animal feed in the United States.

This is, as it happens, completely false. There absolutely is plenty of feedlot beef being eaten in Argentina, and this was also the case back when this article was written. There's grass-fed beef too, and maybe the writer structured their life around only eating those, but the claim that there are no feedlots is just not true.

if you let them make the call, you get a two-inch thick of meat[...]The Argentine steak stands alone, towering three inches over the plate,[...]This gorgeous specimen is called a lomito; it's a standard lunchtime steak, clearly so thin that the Argentines are embarrassed to send it out into the world without a protective wrapping of ham and cheese

I have no idea what their obsession with steak thickness is; meat exists at various levels of thick and thin to suit various tastes. If you like yours thick that's fine but quit the projecting, y'know.

As you might expect, vegetarians will have a somewhat rough time here. For most people in Argentina, a vegetarian is something you eat. One's diet will accordingly lean heavily on pastas, gnocchi, salads, and (for the less squeamish ) fish. Vegans will not survive in Argentina.

This is, unfortunately, true (well, hyperbole, but). Rinna had a rather bad time trying to find vegan food when fae came over for visits. The situation is improving slowly, at least.

The homemade cookies bought in the minimarket downstairs taste of steak. [picture of alfajores de maicena[

Jesus. Find somewhere better to buy your snacks.

It should be no surprise that the land of beef also has excellent milk and butter. The milk comes in plastic bags that would give any American marketing department a heart attack. They proudly advertise "GUARANTEED 100% BRUCELLOSIS AND HOOF-AND-MOUTH FREE". One brand even brags that its bacteria count never exceeds 100,000 per mL, and prints daily statistics to prove it (only 82,000 bacteria/mL on Monday! mmm!).

Are you under the impression American milk doesn't contain bacteria and that when it spoils it's because of the molecules' sheer willpower? Or do you just object to the reminder that they exist?

This menu is delicious, but with rare exceptions it is all you are going to get. People coming for more than a few weeks are advised to bring a discreet bottle of Tabasco sauce.

Eat at better restaurants.

With any order from the master menu comes the Bread Basket, which should be treated as you would treat a basket of wax fruit, that is, as a purely decorative ornament. It is considered bad form to actually eat anything from Bread Basket

What are you talking about. Do all your dining companions just suck, eat some bread.

Dulce de leche is a culinary cry for help. It says "save us, we are baffled and alone in the kitchen, we don't know what to do for dessert and we're going to boil condensed milk and sugar together until help arrives". This cloying dessert tar is so impossibly sweet that you wish you were ten years old again, just so you could actually enjoy it. It is everywhere. There is a special dulce de leche shelf in the supermarket dairy case, and the containers go up to a liter in size. Even the churros are stuffed with it - the churros, Montresor!

It is rare that I feel insulted for the sake of my country, but this? How dare you.

Yes, of course we fill churros with dulce de leche; the real question is why anyone doesn't, short of dietary restrictions. Finding out that people do otherwise was like learning that in other countries, "sandwich" just means two slices of bread. Live a little. Eat a real godsdamned churro.

I spent a considerable amount of time trying to figure out how meals work in Argentina, and they remain a mystery to me. Dinner is clear enough: people tend to go to restaurants beginning at ten o'clock (for those with small children), with the main rush around eleven, and dinner is pretty much over at one or so in the morning. And breakfast - or rather, its absence - follows as a logical consequence of eating a steak the size of a beagle at midnight. But I have yet to figure out whether people eat some kind of meal in the afternoon, and if so, when.

At... noon? Like. We eat lunch. Usually somewhere around 12:00. I am eating lunch right now, and I have done so essentially every day of my life. This is just baffling.

I've come to think the culprit in the missing Argentine lunch scene is yerba mate.

how.

Where the ignorant foreigner may see just another kind of herbal tea (yerba mate is a very unassuming shrub that grows in the northern parts of the country) the Argentine sees a taste treat of unimaginable subtlety, and a tonic for all his problems. The Wikipedia article on proper mate preparation should give you a warning of the level of obsessiveness attainable here (the Urugayans are even worse). To the virgin palate, mate tastes like green tea mixed with grass clippings. The beverage is traditionally drunk out of a little gourd, through a metal straw called a bombilla, with hot (but not boiling!!) water poured into it (without wetting the surface!! clockwise!!) from a thermos.

Yeah, this is accurate. Well, not the clockwise part, never heard anyone complain about that and I can't imagine it mattering.

What distinguishes mate from coffee and tea is the social context - two or more people share a gourd, with a designated pourer in charge of refilling it with hot water after each turn. The ritual is low-fuss but indispensible. You can buy mate gourds and thermoses in any grocery store, and get your thermos filled with hot water at any convenience store or gas station, but you will never see mate served in restaurants or sold in little disposable paper gourds, to go. it's not that people refuse to drink mate alone - anyone working a solitary shift will have a gourd in hand - but that the concept of being served mate by someone who does not share it with you seems impossible.

This is also true. Attempts have been made to sell to-go mate but it's never very popular, the social ritual is important. Also unfortunately a disease vector, I haven't had any mate in a year and a half.

Mate aficionados will tell you that mate contains a special compound, mateine, that serves as a tonic and mild stimulant, promoting alertness without making it hard to sleep, reducing fatigue and appetite, helping the digestion and serving as a mild diuretic. Scientists will tell you that mateine bears a suspicious resemblance to a chemical called caffeine. Mate aficionados will then grow indignant, explaining that mateine is really a stereoisomer (mirror image) of caffeine, with different effects, which will in turn irritate the scientists, who will snap that caffeine doesn't have a chiral center, so it can't have a distinguishable mirror image, and why don't the mate aficionados just put a sock in it.

The first part of this is true; some people definitely think "mateine" is different from caffeine and it absolutely isn't. Never heard the stereoisomer claim before but googling it does confirm some people say so.

still have no idea what any of this has to do with lunch, though. I promise you nobody skips lunch because mate is just too filling.

The wine here is very good (something has to stand up to that steak), but Argentina has no liquor to call its own, relying on whiskies like Old Smuggler and the low-maintenance Don Juan cognac to carry the flag.

There's a fundamental omission from this list and it's called fernet.

Beer is ubiquitous and comes in a bewildering variety of sizes, although there is a skittishness about the full-on liter. Things level off at 970 mL. In my case, it means I end up drinking 1940 mL of beer as a kind of personal protest, and all is well with the world. To make up for the abundance of sizes, beer comes in only one variety, Quilmes, which inevitably comes served with a tripartite platter of snacks - nuts, salty cylinders, and aged potato chips.

I never had trouble buying beer by the litre, but I confess I never tried to do so in 2006 on account of being under 18 at the time.

Anyway, beer comes in a lot more varieties today, thankfully, because Quilmes sucks. I'll never be a beer person, but at least these days there's options I tolerate.

[original post]

[i-cant-sing]

Okay, Moon anon was able to contact me and I'm gonna post their chapters 3-6 here.

Daniel and YN 3 🌗🌗

Rainy days are crazy. Some of YN’s best and worst memories were on a rainy day. It was a rainy day when Daniel was born. His parents overjoyed when he decided to join the world early. The Sunny morning turned rainy when they saw something was wrong. The sky was so dark when the doctored explained that their baby didn’t get enough oxygen in the womb or when he came out. That his brain was impacted by the trauma. It took four years for Daniel’s mother to stop blaming herself, four years for her to understand that she couldn’t have known that something was wrong in her womb. Four years when they had their second child. It was a rainy day when YN and Daniel got lost. Holding each other’s hand, tightly they wandered the Kamino Ward. Hoping that their parents would be right down an alley or around the corner. That was a terrible 6th birthday for YN. The steps Daniel left in the dirt started to get deeper and more burnt. The boy slightly started to tremble. “Daniel.. it’s gonna be ok. Momma and Pop are going to find us we just have to-“ “Are you two lost?” A very tall man in a black suit asked. YN couldn’t remember his face, but his voice was eerily calm and smoothe. His head had snow white hair on it. A look at him would’ve left even the hero All Might scared. “ye…Yes. My brother and I can’t find our parents..” “Oh dear. Well I can help you. They couldn’t have gotten far.” He held his hand to Daniel. And he almost took it had YN not stepped in. “We’re not supposed to touch strangers.” “Oh yes, that’s a very good rule. Well my name is.. Shigaraki. Now what are yours?” “…yn.. and daniel..” “Now we aren’t strangers. Let’s get you two somewhere safe. Your brother’s quirk might level the neighborho-“ “YN! DANIEL!” The relieved voice of their father shouted out. And the two quickly turned away, toward his calls and open arms. Tears running down their faces, swearing to never wander off again. The day was saved. When YN went to turn to Mr Shigaraki to tell him it was fine, he had disappeared into the crowd. But one question lingered in her head. How did he know Daniel’s quirk could be dangerous? It was a sunny day at first when YN and Daniel went out to the park for their Day out. YN had already planned to tell her parents that she wanted to come back here for her 12th birthday in a few months. Daniel kept over-stimulating himself with every single thing that caught his eyes. The anthill, the trees, the way the wind carried the leaves, when he and YN jumped around over the hopscotch drawings. When the rain came down they didn’t want to leave. They wanted to splash in the wetness like a couple of ducks. But Momma was insistent it was time to go back to the apartment. Inside the car YN immediately put on her headphones to listen to nightcore covers of popular songs. It wasn’t until she noticed her mom’s terrified expression and felt her dad’s fear did she take them off. “-I DONT KNOW ITS NOT BREAKING!” “WE’RE GOING RIGHT INTO TRAFFIC! DO SOMETHING!” “..momma?..” “DANIEL! YN GET DOWN!” That was the last thing her mother said to her. The rain hit the car harder. Daniel was quick to cover his little sister as the car swerved towards a large truck. YN felt her brother shield over their bodies. The last thing she heard from her father was a yell. Before they crashed into the truck. Before YN and Daniel were flung out into the side of the road. Scratches beginning to litter their arms and cheeks. YN felt the rain on her face as she tried looking up. Tried finding her parents. It was a rainy day when the last image of her parents was the crushed front end of the car. 🌗🌗

Daniel and YN 4 🌗🌗

The incident at the cafe left a bigger mess then was intended. Of course the waitress didn’t say a word about who caused the mess, still terrified of the threat, but the manager still called the police. At the moment it was being investigated as a break in. It wasn’t until they started to bag the broken vases as evidence did they think to call a hero as they believed this was a terrorist villain trying to strike more fear. When the first cop touch the broken vases he immediately fell over and started seizing. Like someone had sent hundreds of volts up through his gloved fingers and into his blood stream. The second cop tried picking up the glass with prongs so that she wouldn’t get the same effect. But she still felt some pain and volts. Even the glass windows were giving off static. When they were examined no one could find a point of impact. It was almost like they spontaneously exploded. Worse and more confusing yet was the fact that the material seemed to give off radiation spikes. From a computer screen image, it was like a red glow was emanated from the glass. When the police tried to check the cameras, all the footage was either ruined, too melted to gather anything. It left them in a stump. So they had to make a plea to the hero society to get fresh eyes and help on the case. Not expecting any big response. Some heroes wanted to solve the mystery because it stumped them as well. This quirk residue was something unseen before. Calls and emails were left. All saying they would look into it. And it seemed like this would just be a mysterious case left forgotten. That is until the All Might showed up in the station one morning. Along with his protege Deku. They said they wanted to solve the case because if this person left such a dangerous residue after using their quirk, then they were a danger to themselves and others. No on saw the real intentions in their eyes. When they asked about the only other patron in the cafe the police said that they tried tracking them down, but they were gone into the wind. The only other patron at the cafe made their way into a compound. Holding treats meant for a little girl. But first he had to make a stop at his boss’s office. “Hey.. Kai. You won’t believe what Just saw.” Meanwhile in the station two separate rats made calls to two separate people. “Put me through to Shigaraki…. Hello. I have something interesting to tell you. Something that might please you and your Sensei.” “Oh hey there Aizawa. Detective Tsukauchi here. Look I you know about that cafe destruction a week ago? Yea well I think you outta here about this.” Indeed the cafe incident left a bigger mess than intended. 🌗🌗

Daniel and YN part 5 🌗🌗

They’d been gone for at least two months. YN’s feet hurt and Daniel missed his own bed. But they had to keep going, with no intended final destination but a goal to keep away from the previous home they ran from. After the morning at the cafe, YN and Daniel had kept to the shadows for the rest of the day. But they couldn’t keep going like this. They needed to eat today but not at a restaurant. There was only one dreaded… dreaded option. The grocery store. So after they checked in at the latest motel with kitchens in the rooms, the siblings ventured off to the store.YN couldn’t leave Daniel alone yet. He’d panic and probably have a fit. The store was minimally packed. Since it was still early in the day it seemed like they would zip in and out with relative ease. After grabbing the bare essentials, and what she could pack in a backpack without much drag, it was time to go to the candy aisle. It was a long journey thus far, a journey deserving of some sour candies. But of course there had to be another person there. Invading space and looking right at her favorites. She wanted to just grab and go. But her hand and the stranger's hand touched as they reached for the same one. “Sorry. I should’ve watched where I was going heh..” The tall redhead said. A small blush on his face as he rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s fine. Lemme just grab and go here.” She looked back for Daniel, luckily he was close by staring at the varieties of pocky they had. Turning back she noticed his uniform. UA, that might prove to be a complication. But YN was desperate for some kind words and a brief moment to talk to someone her own age. “So you go to UA? Are you a general student or a hero course student?” “Oh hero course definitely! I even have my hero name chosen!” “Wow that’s great. I hope in a few years I get to be saved by…?” “Red Riot!” “Like Crimson Riot?” “Exactly! I really admire him and I hope I live up to his-“ “OI SH**TY HAIR! WE’RE GONNA BE LATE! GRAB YOUR CRAP AND LET’S GO!” A blonde kid shouted down the aisle, also wearing a UA outfit. YN couldn’t place why but she felt like she’d known him before. That volume felt very familiar, but it startled her brother who jumped in fear causing the pocky he saw to fall off the shelving. Time to go now. “I should go anyway. It was nice meeting you.” “Wait, we could walk you and your brother to your school if you guys want?” “We have to go.” The blonde got closer and she could tell something was perpetually up his ass. “Bye.” “Wait! My name’s Eijiro Kirishima. What’s yours?” “YN. Just YN. That’s my brother Daniel.” And before he or his companion could ask anything else the two siblings fast walked toward the checkout and were out the door before they got another chance to talk to them. “YN… huh she was pretty cool right bakubro!” “What ever. Let’s get going before we show up after Deku.” But that name was familiar to him. The girl had long since faded from his mind, but how could anyone forget the day when a quirkless kid tried bashing your head into the dirt. He planned on apologizing the next day for his comments but she was gone. Gone and almost forgotten. It could be possible that this was just someone who shared the same name. But maybe.. possibly.. the universe was giving him the chance to apologize. “YN.” 🌗🌗

Daniel and YN part 6 🌗🌗

YN never really liked her neighbors. She never outright loathed them, but she was uncomfortable with how Inko kept trying to be her mother, and how Izuku had this strange obsessive stare when he looked at her. As long as they stayed in their apartment and never bothered them it would all be fine. But their parents couldn’t watch them all the time. So on days when momma and pop went out Miss Midoryia would graciously watch them. YN never liked pity. So when Miss Midoryia tried to pity and feel sorry about YN’s quirkless status, that just made her dig her heels in longer. She didn’t need people to fuss over her like she was a glass doll. At least with Izuku she could’ve had a companion. She did try to get along with him. But he was so weird. Just because they both were quirkless didn’t mean they’d would be close. “So why are you homeschooled?” “I get into fights.” “Why?” “Because people are mean and they think they’ll have no consequences to their words. I proved them wrong.” “Were they mean because you’re quirkless or because Daniel is… different?” Now obviously he didn’t mean any harm by that. But an emotional 10 year old girl is not someone to mess with. So with a sharp glare to his face the conversation quickly died. In the dining room, Daniel would usually be coloring. Or playing with his legos. Something to stim and distract his mind. Sometimes he’d just pull out a old painting his dad got him, and he’d spend hours looking at the strokes and would mentally add a new feature. Twirling the hair on his head whilst sucking/biting his thumb. “Daniel? Would you like some water?” “No miss. I want momma.” “I know sweetie but she won’t be gone forever. And you call me Inko” Though she’d prefer him to call her something more affectionate. Throughout the night Inko kept trying to mother them. She hovered over YN’s neck and tried petting her head which resulted in a swipe from the little girl. By the time YN’s parents got back, she was relieved and spent the rest of the night complaining to her mom about how she didn’t want to go over to the neighbors anymore and how she felt uncomfortable. Across the hall the two greenettes were enamored with the two kids. Inko adored how sweet Daniel was, how shy he looked to her. Izuku was star struck at this girl without a quirk who was so quick to fight against the norms put in place by a society against them. They'd soon make it a habit to try to talk to the family in the hall, or bump into them on the street. One day, after the family had been gone for a couple weeks, they saw the two with several police officers and a social worker packing away all their belongings. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that something terrible had happened. When Inko offered to watch them, the social worker confirmed the worst and took the children away. Three weeks later, as her son was at school Inko kept trying to find the legal way for her to gain custody of the kids when her door was knocked. Her husband, AFO, on the other side. She tried telling him to go away. Tried saying that he had no part in Izuku’s life anymore. But he had a bigger role than known. “How can you be so cruel my love? Especially now that I’ve opened the door for you to gain what you want?” “What do you mean?” “I’ll help you gain custody of the two children you are craving. I happen to have a fascination with them as well.” “I can’t ever guarantee that we’ll be a whole family ever again.” “Of course not. I wouldn’t expect you to. But let’s try something for now.” So Inko made a deal with the devil, to gain two angels. 🌗🌗

Now that AFO is in the story, I'm like so excited! Great work, Moon anon!

[thermodynamiclawyer]

yeah, this is gonna be a trainwreck. here’s @bandagegirl ‘s and my GHS headcanon masterpost. our goal was to have at least 3 per character, if not more. we kinda had to group the last few characters together in the end, though. it’ll be split up in categories between the characters in the Game, then Anime-Only, and then overall Worldbuilding at the end as for easier reading.

Game Characters

Gregory

the Lost World/Gregory House is Gregory’s own manifestation through loneliness and envy. (see Worldbuilding)

he’s WAY older than a grandfather of James. he’s more of a great-great-great-great grandfather, but it’s easier to just call him grandpa.

he’s been long dead in reality for years. always constantly dreaming and manifesting his Lost World and eventually never woke up.

there is almost 0 records of him from reality. because of this, there is no clear time period he originated in, unlike the guests.

he’s a collector. he loves historically significant antique items to put on a shelf and learn all about.

as taken from the manga, his favorite historical subject is War.

he suffered from frequent night terrors as a teenager, making it difficult to sleep before the manifestation of the Lost World.

while he usually tries to set up a weekly chore schedule for the residents in the hotel, he usually ends up doing everything himself (both because the guests throw in the towel very quickly and that Gregory wants to do everything right).

his magic abilities include teleportation and immortality, but he’s still very prone to injury.

Gregory Mama

she’s actually a manifestation within the Lost World that Gregory used to cope/punish himself with.

has the tendency to adopt new guests as family members only to eat them/their souls later. this also applies to Gregory attempting to manifest new family members in the past, to which he stopped after Gregory Mama has shown to steal their souls each time.

obviously, she’s not Gregory’s real mother, rather a personification of the abuse Gregory suffered in reality.

as young children usually don’t use their parents real name often, she doesn’t have a real name.

James

he’s a child who escaped reality after discovering a forgotten family member (Gregory) in very old family photos; having little to no relation to the rest of the family.

plus, hearing rumors of a hotel that only appeared during moonless nights only encourage him to take on a challenge.

since he’s related to Gregory (even if it’s very distant), his monster transformation was a lot faster, becoming a full rat in little under a month.

he LOVES horror movies, especially slasher films. he might be a little too influenced by them.

he owns a large range of weapons, from toy water guns to actual chainsaws. that doesn’t mean he’ll use them responsibly, though.

he’s a very smart kid, even to the point where he can be manipulative to both the kids and the adults. he’ll even convince other kids to take the blame for him whenever he starts problems.

his parents from reality miss him very much.

Catherine

in reality, Catherine was a German nurse in the 1940’s during WW2.

as a human, she was actually afraid of the sight of blood and would get lightheaded whenever she had to treat a soldier’s wounds. however, as a determined nurse, she tried her hardest to become tolerant of blood. tolerance became fondness and fondness became obsession to the point where she was hurting her patients just to see blood again.

she is attracted to both men and women, however she experiences internalized biphobia. due to this, she’s desperate to find true love with a man while specifically trying to avoid romantic relationships with women.

she knows how to take care of children.

she molts her skin during periods of time, you know, since she’s a lizard.

she didn’t gain magic powers along with her transformation, but instead gained physical strength.

Cactus Gunman and Cactus Girl

both originated in the Mexican revolution, especially around 1910.

Gunman had been shot in the chest a few times in his life and surprisingly survived each of them.

Gunman’s personality completely changed once he arrived in Gregory House with his sister, becoming a paranoid coward from the brave “hero” he made himself out to be.

they both grow seasonal flowers in the springtime. Gunman grows one large red flower on his head, which he hides with his hat in the spring time. he prefers to only show to his potential lover. Cactus Girl grows smaller white flowers in her hair.

Gunman is in dire need of glasses.

Gunman is quite fond of gardening, and loves to talk about flora. sometimes, Lost Doll will accompany him in the courtyard while he weeds.

they would die for each other, so don’t cross them.

Cactus Girl can shoot better than Gunman, but prefers her lasso and other melee weapons. she’s sworn off using guns after the revolution.

Cactus Girl has the ability to spawn in zones in smaller closed areas, such as turning her hotel room into Cactus Land; sort of like a pocket dimension. it’ll disappear as soon as she leaves the room.

sometimes, they both don’t need to eat due to the occasional Photosynthesis, and can go a long time without water.

Hell’s Chef

he worked as a highly regarded chef in Russia at a fancy restaurant, with mixed European family origins.

him and Mirror Man were coworkers of some sort.

he came from a long line of wrestlers, but broke family tradition to cook as a passion and career.

he died after the restaurant went up in flames.

his throat is still scratchy and rough from the incident, so he isn’t much of a talker. not to mention the language barrier and that he’s still attempting to learn the language everyone else speaks in Gregory House.

while the appearance of his meals look absolutely irredeemable, Chef’s cooking is actually very tasty; so much that you almost can’t taste the poison. he prefers making meals that are hearty and savory, rather than “looking good”.

he prefers to do all the food shopping and butchering. nobody knows the best ingredient selections like he does.

like Catherine, all of this “magic ability” went to his incredible strength.

most, if not all of his body is made out of wax, with vein like wick all throughout the body, giving him general bodily structure.

Neko Zombie

(see Worldbuilding)

Clock Master and My Son

My Son was a stillborn in reality; the death of him and his mother gave Clock Master an alcohol addiction and depression.

1960 is the year My Son and CM's wife died, making it when time stopped for CM. he’s sort of “stuck” in 1960 in a way, which is why the year is plastered on both of their foreheads.

My Son was technically "born" in Gregory House.

when Clock Master came to Gregory House, an infant My Son was already waiting in his room. Because the child died before getting a name, CM referred to him as My Son.

while CM's time abilities are getting worse with age, they never were great to begin with due to the Lost World's unusual flow of time.

My Son's time abilities on the other hand have the potential to be the most powerful ability out of everyone's when he gets older, being able to play multiple timelines at the same time and even rewriting reality. this is due to being born in the Lost World, so his ability has adapted to Gregory House’s “time” system.

Judgement Boy + Gold

instead of a singular character, Judgement Boys are classified as a “species” considering there are multiple of them, with more being produced in the Judgement Factory daily. there is not a singular JB.

the Judgement Factory in Gregory House is a sub-factory of a much bigger Core Factory, where it branches off into different zones and other manifestations. There are countless Judgement Factories in existence, all with numerous JBs being produced and trained.

Judgement Boy Gold is an individual one-of-a-kind model, however, there are more in the “Metal” series similar to him in different factories with a variety of training jobs.

JBs came into existence after a lawyer in the early 2000’s won a court case that suppressed the rights and safety of these assembly line workers in a Toy Factory, which caused hundreds of workers to be injured or even killed. realizing the consequences of his actions, he spiraled downwards into insanity and ended up in Gregory House, rarely leaving his hotel room and eventually manifesting the Factory.

most models or designs of a Judgement Boy are based off of toys; one of the very few things reflected from the lawyer’s fatal court case.

the standard JB’s appearance is a bastardized caricature of the original lawyer, only with added cages and robotic features. the lawyer began transforming into a red monster with sharp teeth and claws, but never saw the results as he disappeared into the Core Factory one day, never to be seen again.

see @ask-factory and the #extended factory tag for a more extensive story.

Mummy Family

Mummy Papa, Mummy Dog, and Mummy Mama originated somewhere in the 1980’s.

the reason they’re in Gregory House is an overlap of death and the fact that Mummy Papa was unintentionally poisoning the 3, leading to ending up in the hotel as a “punishment”.

they’re Bloodhounds.

Mummy Papa loves to collect weapons and owns a saber collection, especially older historically significant ones.

Mummy Dog enjoys morbid facts and likes to tell the other children about death.

Mummy Papa has Münchausen Syndrome by Proxy, which is triggered when the sword shifts in his head. because of this, he keeps himself and the rest of his family sicker with unclear motives, perhaps to have the ability brag about their ailments. (more details here)

Mummy Mama suffers from more immune-system based illnesses and anemia while the other two deal with physical and phantom pain, which they all pass off as colds.

the plant in Mummy Mama’s head is a parasite, and needs to be fed directly to continue living if Mummy Mama gets too weak. (the plant prefers blood)

TV-Fish

one of the few characters classified as a species.

TV Fish have a wide variety of fish or other sea creatures they can be. the TV Fish in Gregory House are much smaller.

some TV Fish don’t even have to be TVs. some can be other electronic appliances just as long as they’re combined with a fish skeleton.

they can be found across other Zones and places besides the Lost World, some with localized and native species differing from what we already seen.

TV Fish are an invasive species in the Lost World.

they’re attracted to people with better memory. a person more intact and in touch with their memories could attract an entire school of TV Fish!

Roulette Boy

practically a God, Roulette Boy has reality bending powers.

however, since he follows his own rules strictly, he sets limits on himself as to only use them for his games, and won’t apply them to himself since he’s the Game Master.

nobody knows what the “rules” he follow are, but he restrains himself on what he can do while hosting a game. though, once you’re in his game, it’s almost a free-for-all and he can change you to be whatever pawn he sees fit until the game is over.

while RB prefers traditional board games, nothing’s stopping him from hosting RPGs or other turn-based video games (as seen in Lost Qualia.) he also loves gacha games and gambling.

when not hosting a game, he likes to roleplay.

Angel/Devil Dog

she is not a guest in Gregory House, neither a manifestation of the Lost World. she is a messenger from an entire separate outside world/reality, and she’s always been Angel Dog.

her, Death, and Gregory have been around equally the longest.

her and Gregory have a long history of rivalry. she’s always meddling in the Lost World and trying to let souls out a backdoor. whether she’s doing it to free them, or just to piss off Gregory, depends on her mood.

Angel Dog has a solid grasp on reality, however, her reality is different from the guests. it’s why her and Neko Zombie get along.

she doesn’t have a split personality disorder, as she chooses to become Devil Dog whenever she feels like it. her decision making is very emotion-based.

she’s a Dachshund!

Devil Dog likes soccer, and Angel Dog likes american football.

Lost Doll

ever since coming to the Lost World, she has either stopped aging altogether or she ages very slowly, as most object-based guests do.

she’s a wooden marionette with the ability to change her size.

in reality, she belonged to a very poor family who could only afford a few outdated wooden toys, which is why Katie was so special to her.

she’s good friends with James, even if she’s usually the one falling victim to his pranks. sometimes, when Katie takes over, it can be the other way around.

she has poor volume control and tends to shout when she’s excited or provoked.

she’s the youngest guest.

Death

Death, like Gregory Mama, is a manifestation of a part of Gregory's life.

he was created from Gregory’s favorite comfort movie, The Seventh Seal.

Death used to work in Gregory House as a doorman, welcoming the guests and wishing them goodbye, but fleed when Gregory Mama appeared and got rid of all other "manifestations".

his goal is to free Gregory's soul and end the Lost World, which is only possible if Gregory is the only person left.

Anime Characters

Dr.Fritz

Dr.Fritz is also German like Catherine, but came a little later in time.

back in reality, his body slowly stop responding, so he illegally tried to build himself a new body. that new body wasn’t fully ready yet when he decided to transplant his own brain when he was wheelchair bound and starting to lose arm control, so it was a very long process.

because of his condition, doctors either didn’t treat him correctly or flat out ignored his problems, so he has a strong mistrust to other doctors, which is why he wanted to operate on himself. the other doctors said there was nothing they could do, but he had other plans in mind.

he was there for the Berlin wall falling, and still has a piece of it as a keepsake.

he falls apart easily and has to re-sew body parts or snap his neck back into place. Catherine helps put him back together (in return, Fritz helps her shed.)

Catherine calls him Fritzchen on occasion.

he documents the species of the patients he treats out of curiosity and hopes to help them better. his treatments may be considered “unethical” but he knows for certain that if it’s to cure or treat the patient, he’ll go great lengths to break any rule in the medical field.

Mono Eye Wizard + Frog Fortune Teller

both are canonically married to each other, i just wanted to make sure everyone knew :]

Mono Eye Wizard wears a helmet, and he’s also an amphibian with one eye underneath his robe.

both are very interested and knowledgeable in the Magical and Paranormal side of the Lost World.

both held onto their souls for longer than most people, but lost them in the end.

Wizard is normally very powerful, he just SUCKS at summonings. (plus, he’s a little bit of an idiot)

on the other hand, Frog Fortune Teller isn’t very powerful, but she is very smart (and stubborn). she’s almost always right, especially if it’s a bad thing she predicted.

Wizard, and other characters such as Musha Dokuro and Egypetit all worship the same Dark Lord.

the little horned skeletons in Wizard’s cult are also classified as a species. sometimes, he allows in other interested members.

Wizard is fluent in latin.

Second Guest

the Second Guest, as shown at the end of the season two, has the silhouette of a rat. that’s her actual form; a shadow.

her “job” is to eavesdrop on other guests to go and report to Gregory Mama.

she’s very fast, quiet, hard to catch, and a big snitch.

the others call her “Hello Sister” as a title, while Gregory Mama calls her “My Lovely Daughter.”

her cigarette embers still glow on the wall, which is one of the only signals she’s in the room, especially in a poorly lit one.

usually only Gregory, James, and Mama can “hear” what she’s saying.

Chef strongly dislikes her and Lost Doll avoids her like the plague.

Prompters

a pair of indistinguishable twins, escaping reality after being rejected of their dream to become famous theater actors. both young adults.

they work multiple part time jobs, including helping out in the Judgement Factory in the hotel and Kabuki's theater, along with Poor Conductor’s performances.

they share drinks at the bar. their favorite drink is a raspberry/strawberry milkshake with two cherries. don’t forget to give them two straws!

they’re both learning how to cook with Hell’s Chef. so far, they can dice onions very well. :]

Public Phone

he’s in the Lost World as a punishment for being a greedy thief in reality.

he can create fake alibis, passports, various cards in addition to faking voices.

he’s drinking pals with Clock Master.

he takes any currency, just nothing fake. only HE can be the swindle here.

he’s a perverted little bitch.

Various Species

Haniwa Salarymen are classified as species, created from overworked businessmen in reality. The occurrence of them are very common, and season 1 happens to focus on one of them.

Black Ducks are a species, specializing in working kiosks, amusement parks, and other booths. Speed Mouse is never seen without a team of Black Ducks. Street Vendors sometimes accompany them.

Musha Dokuro are an invasive species to the Lost World.

Trap Mice are a (rare) artificial species built in the Lost World.

Dead Bodies are also classified as a species. they are the result of Death freeing an individual’s soul, leaving a husk/empty body behind.

species like these show up in reality to those who are close to their visit in the Lost World, appearing in the background or the corner of their eye, replacing real people.

individuals in all of those species are not visible/noticable until you interact and get close with them. they’re like NPCs.

Others

Wooden Lizard was Captain Wood’s favorite keychain that came to life.

Fat Chicken is an omnivore. He can and will eat anything.

(see here for Pig Gentleman and Mirror Man.)

Mirror Man can summon his own pocket dimension.

Kinko and Inko know more than they lead on, and Kinko is definitely much more powerful, but he can’t be bothered to do anything about it. he’s lazy.

Inko smokes cigars, but hates cigarettes.

Earth Man (from Lost Qualia) is non-verbal. he’s also very eco friendly!

Hell’s Taxi is a manifestation of a false sense of hope to escape the Lost World. it can also manifest in Reality to pick up new guests.

Egypetit’s head is made up of Gold, a strong conductor of magic in the Lost World.

Poor Conductor was powerful enough to manifest his own room into the Lost World, rather than checking into the Hotel himself.

Unbaba is semi non-verbal and cannot remove his mask. he’s definitely powerful enough to make guests lose their souls.

Bonsai Kabuki needs to water his head frequently or else he’ll be drained of energy, and be unable to open his third eye.

The Rainbow Dragon fossils, which Bonehead is after, are cursed, and uses his wife’s voice to compel him into seeking after them to claim yet another victim.

Toilet Baby may not be as powerful, but he can still summon dangerous attacks related to pocket dimensions.

Sleepy Sheep is used as a vessel in his sleep for those who are powerful enough to enter dreams.

Worldbuilding

Gregory House was a real place back in Reality, and it originally belonged to Neko Zombie and his loving family.

However, years and years of built up envy and hatred from Gregory, a person who didn’t receive the same love and luxuries as Neko Zombie, manifested the Lost World as a way for him to cope with the things he didn’t have in Reality, bringing the house down with him.

The remains of the house in Reality is now a mere rumor in the town, but its influence spreads across many zones to this day.

Neko Zombie is the final remaining member of the original owners of the house.

Him and Gregory are LONG forgotten for generations in Reality.

Zones are a loose term in the Lost World, which could mean alternate realities, different dimensions, etc. The Lost World is a zone with its own manifestations.

Another Zone could have its own origins and realities. Reality is not a zone, if that makes sense.

A Zone itself can manifest as a single individual or object being the Core that keeps the zone existing. (See The Core Judgement Factory that branches off Sub-Factories into different Zones.)

The Lost World is a very large Zone that reaches and branches off into other Zones, pulling in individuals.

Because of Zonal shenanigans, time moves a lot differently in the Lost World.

awful hospital does a better job handling zones better than this, actually. we took a little bit of inspiration from it. see here and here for a better grasp on what i’m trying to say.

[artificialqueens]

Modern Love, 1/12 (Branjie/Scyvie/Ninex) - Ortega

fic summary: Brooke Lynn is a 23 year old graduate writing boring, uninspired pieces for the fashion department of a newspaper and living in a city all her friends have moved away from. Silky is living at her parents’ house and spends her days applying for jobs she’s promptly rejected for. Nina and Monet are struggling through their first year as teachers whilst being sickeningly adorable girlfriends. Akeria is pursuing her dream of being a badass lawyer, even if her master’s degree is slowly crushing her soul. Plastique is acting like the second coming of Paris Hilton, so nothing there has changed. Scarlet is overworked and Yvie is underpaid and their relationship isn’t all it appears from the outside.

And Vanessa? Vanessa is nowhere to be seen.

(A story about a holiday, a breakup, friendships and relationships in a post-graduate world, careers, navigating life after university, figuring out what it means to be an adult, and coming to terms with the fact that we really are not nineteen forever.)

a/n: welcome to the sequel to Not Nineteen Forever!!! i should say it’s not *~ mandatory ~* to have read the original before this but it’s encouraged huehue xo hope u enjoy and please feel free to reblog, like and send love!!

***

Brooke felt the all-encompassing sense of dread wash over her as her alarm went off, the sounds of the radio that were gradually fading in doing nothing to make the experience of waking up for another day of work any more palatable. She groaned loudly as she stretched, her arms flying out to the side and hitting the edge of the double bed. Brooke starfished a little, stretching her legs out as long as they would go and trying to put off getting up and showered for as long as she could.

Rolling over in bed she reached for her phone and stopped when she saw the rose-gold rectangular frame beside her on the bedside table. It caught her by surprise every day, almost a sort of routine in itself. A picture of her and Vanessa from when they first moved in, standing at the doorway having just popped a bottle of champagne. Brooke’s face was in a funny contorted sort of smile as she yanked the cork out of the bottle and Vanessa was clapping her hands in excitement, a brilliant white moonbeam painted across her face. Brooke remembered the day well. Monet had taken the photo with Nina beside her, both of them still in their work clothes after they’d visited straight from a hard day full of teaching. Akeria, Silky, Plastique, Scarlet and Yvie had all been inside, shuffling through the huge variety of Domino’s pizza boxes that had just arrived at their door like a deck of cards. That night had been so special. Whatever had happened since then, Brooke would probably treasure that memory forever.

In spite of herself she smiled as she looked at the photograph, then turned her attention to her phone screen.

No notifications. She didn’t know why she expected anything more.

With a cloud over her head that matched the ones in the uncharacteristically grey June sky, Brooke brushed her teeth and peeled her pyjamas off before stepping into the shower and adjusting the dial to somewhere between tepid and warm. Vanessa’s shower gel sat in the corner, the tropical fruit and mint one with little tiny sloths all over the front. Brooke found herself hurting as she looked at it, still loath to use it as she took her own from the opposite side and splatted a huge dollop into her shower puff. Sometimes she used it indulgently, like a secret she shared with herself. She didn’t know whether she’d buy more when it ran out. That was something she still needed to think about.

Once she was clean Brooke briskly dried herself with a towel, sitting on the edge of the bed wrapped in it as she carefully blow-dried out her hair. She picked out her outfit: smart black work trousers with a fabric belt that pulled her in at the waist, a black and white patterned shirt, black stiletto heels. As she painted some minimal makeup on her face in the hope it would make her look less like a sleep-deprived zombie and more like she had her life together in some way, Brooke checked the clock and cursed as she realised she was running behind.

Leaving lipstick for the moment, she grabbed her bag, shoved her feet in a pair of black pumps, and left hurriedly for the train. Breakfast wasn’t a priority; she knew she could grab an iced coffee and a croissant from the cafe in the station in between changing trains, as it took her two to get into work. It was times such as these that she wished she knew how to drive like Monet, Plastique and Akeria, or had learned since uni like Nina or Scarlet. But then again, cafe food for breakfast was one of the very few perks of public transport.

Brooke eventually arrived at the huge concrete block with windows that held her offices, taking the elevator up to the fifth floor, clocking in, shooting a lacklustre “hi” to the girls she sometimes chatted to and settling herself in at her desk. As office positions went, Brooke supposed it wasn’t awful- it was beside the window looking out onto the streets of the city below and it provided some much-needed light to her day. Logging on to her work laptop, she checked her emails (one from her boss about the article due for Friday, and one from Cheryl about money for flowers for somebody going on maternity leave that she’d never met or heard of and might not even have worked there).

Her working day had started.

University hadn’t prepared Brooke for graduate life. It hadn’t prepared her for the fact that friends moved away for jobs and houses and flats, internships and apprenticeships and postgrads and masters. It hadn’t prepared her for the fact that her group chat, once flooded with about a hundred messages if she so much as left it for five minutes, gathered dust as everyone’s lives took over. It hadn’t prepared Brooke for the feeling of missing out on something…Christ knows what. Perhaps living, making memories instead of simply swiping through ones already made on a Saturday night spent alone in bed with a bottle of wine to herself. It hadn’t prepared her for the yearning, the regret at having taken those days for granted when they were the happiest of her life and she hadn’t even realised it. If Brooke had known how soul-crushingly boring her life would be once she got that rolled-up piece of paper in a little tube she would’ve been dragging the girls out every single night. The all-encompassing sadness and longing for something better hit her harder on days like these, sepia ones with big clouds that hung ominously in the sky but never gave her the satisfaction of raining. She supposed that feeling had only been exacerbated by…

She didn’t need to remind herself of that.

It was ten o’clock in the morning and Brooke was staring out of the small office window stupefied with boredom when her phone vibrated. She jumped, pouncing on it as she always did whenever a notification went off. Her phone hadn’t been on silent for a full month. It hadn’t been the person she’d wanted or expected, but it was a pleasant surprise nonetheless.

Silk: HEY GIRL LONG TIME NO SPEAK! I’M GONNA BE IN TOWN THIS AFTERNOON FOR AN INTERVIEW BUT I’LL BE FREE AFTER AND I’VE GOT A COUPLE HOURS TO KICK ABOUT UNTIL MY TRAIN. YOU WANNA GRAB DINNER? XXXXXXXXX

Brooke frantically made plans as if she was under a time limit, as if the moment would slip through her fingers like sand in an hourglass. She suggested some restaurants that she knew wouldn’t eat into either of their fragile graduate salaries and they settled on an Italian in the city centre, where the portions were big and the meals were tasty.

Brooke spent the rest of the day looking forward to meeting her friend. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen Silky. Maybe it had been as long ago as New Year. Brooke smiled as she remembered the occasion; all of them cramming into Scarlet and Yvie’s flat to see in the year. Silky and Akeria had got too drunk off prosecco and screamed along to JLS, Scarlet and Yvie had both made a buffet to rival a hotel’s, and Nina, Monet, Vanessa and Brooke had all been tangled up in an almost relationship-ruining game of Articulate. Plastique had brought her new girlfriend Naomi to introduce to everyone and the girl had looked ever so slightly alarmed by the sheer chaos of everyone put together, but she’d laughed and joined in all the same.

That had been another happy memory. Those seemed to be hard to come by these days.

Work dragged. It always did. Brooke managed to write three sub-par articles that she sent to her editor at the end of the day anyway because hell, it was their job to turn carbon into diamonds. So when she hopped on the train back into the city, Brooke felt a little buzz in her veins that she hadn’t felt in a while.

It took her until she saw Silky standing outside the restaurant- hair in a bun full of flyaways, eyebrows still Sharpied on, in a pair of smart trousers and a floaty top- that Brooke realised that part of the reason she was so excited was because she’d been so lonely for such a long time. Well, only really a month, but it felt like a year. It had taken her living on her own to realise just how boring her life was without all her friends so constantly part of it, and now they all had their own lives and schedules it only served to show Brooke how empty her own was without…

Well. Without her.

As soon as Silky looked up from her phone and spotted Brooke her face lit up, and she fixed her with a smile and a screech that Brooke never thought she would have missed hearing but by God, she had.

“BROOKE LYNN!” she screamed, followed by lots of squealing and babbling as she wrapped the taller girl in a tight hug and refused to let go for at least twenty seconds. Brooke didn’t mind and she found herself clinging back, Silky suddenly the loudest anchor she’d never known she needed. When Silky finally pulled away she grabbed Brooke by both wrists, shaking her back and forth a little. “Oh my God, BITCH! Oh my God. FUCK! It’s so good to see you. How the fuck are you?”

Brooke appreciated that- Silky asking how she was. Yvie tiptoed around Brooke’s feelings when they texted and Brooke tiptoed around her and Scarlet’s perfect domestic bliss, both of the subjects too touchy for Brooke and the pair of them instead choosing to communicate via meme. Nina barely had time to breathe these days let alone text back, and Plastique…well, Plastique wouldn’t get it.

None of them would, she supposed.

“I’m…I’m surviving! I’m being an adult, I guess, and this is what life is now. How’re you?” Brooke swiftly moved the conversation on, and Silky took the hint and dropped both her wrists, pushing open the door.

“I’m on cloud fuckin’ nine girl. C’mon, let’s get some vino an’ I’ll catch you up on the world of Ms. Ganache! Think of it as a free episode of the reality TV show that is my life.”

“Let’s be real, Silk. If anyone’s life’s like a reality TV show right now, it’s mine,” Brooke raised her eyebrows, not quite committing to her own attempt at being lighthearted and instead couldn’t have sounded more bitter if she’d eaten an entire lemon with its rind on.

Silky, for her part, shrugged and let out a small sigh. “You ain’t wrong, girl, you ain’t wrong. But the offer of wine still stands, so let’s get sat. Where the damn hell is a waiter?”

They eventually got shown to their table and the conversation flowed frantically and excitedly, mirroring the wine. Silky filled Brooke in on every last detail of her life- most importantly, Brooke thought, was that Silky’s parents who she was back living with had adopted a cocker spaniel puppy called Pooch. Graduate life had been tough on Silky; she still hadn’t managed to get a job and so therefore couldn’t afford to rent a flat, so she’d moved back to her sleepy and uninspiring hometown. Living with her parents, she’d groaned, was beginning to chip away at her; the constant pressure they put on Silky to find a job, move out, get a boyfriend, and lose weight was beginning to grow wearing in the extreme, and Brooke didn’t blame her for being fed up.

“You know you’re always welcome to come chill at mine, you know. If it’s getting particularly rough,” Brooke suggested not-quite-casually, glad of the fact that loneliness didn’t have a scent because if it did she’d be reeking of it.

Silky gave a bashful smile, looking down at her half-eaten plate of spaghetti bolognaise in front of her. “You’re a doll, B, but you know I can’t do an hour on the train any time my Mama tuts at me buying a size XL of anything. In fact therapy’s probably cheaper than a train ticket here but realistically I don’t got the money for either, so…thanks, but in the words of Simon Cowell, issa no from me.”

“That’s okay. I get it, Mums are simultaneously the worst and the best people,” Brooke pulled a face. Thinking about her Mum made her wonder when the last time she texted her was. She felt a little ashamed for not knowing off the top of her head. “But hey, at least you got that interview, right? How did it go?”

“Alright,” Silky muttered in a non-committal way. It was the most un-Silky response Brooke thought she’d ever seen her friend give. It was weird and unpleasant; the Silky from uni would’ve yelled the place down about how she’d aced it, how they’d make her the chief editor right there and then, how she could write an article for them entirely in Wingdings and it’d still be the best thing they’d read all day.

Seemingly picking up on Brooke’s discomfort, Silky gave a small laugh. “I don’ know, boo…I used to be so sure of myself, I used to be so set in the fact that writing was somethin’ I was good at. When I was a kid I used to write these fuckin’ huge stories…pages an’ pages long that my teachers would pull big overexaggerated smiley faces at an’ squeal over an’ put big glittery star stickers on. I thought I was somethin’ special. An’ then uni, y’know…I was a small fish in a big pond- hell, a big fish in a big pond- but I still thought I was the shit even when I got bad grades. I thought my markers just didn’t get it, that they were the ones that were wrong. But now it’s like…”

Silky heaved a sigh and put her fork and spoon together neatly on top of her half-full plate. “…I can’t even get a job at a fuckin’ local rag, so why the hell am I even tryin’ with the big city offices?”

There was something about it all that made Brooke’s heart break all over again, the way that life after uni had worn Silky down to the extent where she didn’t even know if she was good at anything any more, didn’t have much visible self-worth left. Silky had always been the heart and soul of their group; she, Akeria and Vanessa, and in the time it had taken between now and graduation Akeria had become the polar opposite of Silky- so completely embroiled in her quest to become a barrister that she barely had time to reply to any of them any more.

And Vanessa…well. She knew where Vanessa was. Or rather, she didn’t.

Greece was a big country.

“You’re trying because you’re Big Silky Nutmeg Motherfucking Ganache,” Brooke said with a determination she’d not felt in a while. “Come on Silk, you’re you. If grad life has broken you then what the fuck hope is there for any of us?”

( Any of us sounded better than me , Brooke thought.)

“Kiki’s doin’ okay for herself,” Silky shrugged, her downtrodden tone counteracted by the way she picked up her fork again and twirled a single strand of spaghetti around it, eating it once she was finished speaking.

“Kiki’s vagina-deep in a hellish and all-consuming masters degree that’s probably eating her up from the inside out just as much as everybody else’s jobs are. I mean, are any of us doing anything we actually like?”

“Nina an’ Monet? They’da quit by now if they hated teaching so much.”

“Nina West would join the fucking scientologists and stick it out just so she could say she didn’t give up. She’s the final boss of the term mama didn’t raise a quitter . They’re having a hard time, Silk. We all are. It’s just tough because we’re all so busy and shit at keeping in touch that everybody thinks each others’ lives are perfect but…they’re really not.”

“Yvie and Scarlet seem pretty happy.”

Brooke’s face took on an involuntary look of distaste, so irritated and bitter was she at the image of them and their perfect flat and their perfect jobs and their perfect coupley life. “They’ll have something up, nobody’s life is that perfect. Maybe their relationship’s secretly falling apart or…something, fuck, I don’t know.”

There was a beat of silence in which Brooke finished the last little pocket of tortellini she’d ordered and Silky twirled another mouthful of spaghetti around her fork. She chewed, then shrugged thoughtfully, her head tilting a little. “Y’know we should go on holiday. Fuck all this shit off for a week, get away from it all.”

Brooke’s eyebrows raised in appreciation of the idea. She and the girls had never been away together before and the prospect of lying on a beach doing absolutely nothing under the blazing sun was an inviting one. “What, a girls’ trip? Like in Sex and The City?”

“Mhm. ‘Cept we go on an all-inclusive to the Med ‘stead of Mexico ‘cause ain’t none of us can afford that shit.”

“Except Plastique.”

“True. Fuck that bitch. She could prolly buy Mexico.”

Brooke laughed and for the first time in a good few months she felt a little flicker of excitement lick at her heart, so much so that she could see her pulse race at her wrist. She couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face. “Oh my God. I’m so in. Let’s do it.”

“We have to get all the girls on board, though. Otherwise there ain’t no point.”

“Definitely. Where should we go? Spain’s always good.”

Silky had her phone out and was typing furiously. She paused as something presumably loaded, then her face lit up. “If we go the week after Nina an’ Monet finish up school for Summer we can get flights to Crete for £20 return.”

“Twenty, what the fuck? That can’t be right,” Brooke screwed up her face in disbelief, and Silky cocked an eyebrow at her as she showed her the proof on her screen. Conceding, Brooke shrugged. “That’s so good. I don’t want to know what that plane’s like though. They probably just stuff you all into a tin can and ping you into the air with a giant rubber band.”

Silky howled with laughter and thumped the table so hard that the wine sloshed about in their glasses, little tiny red tsunamis. As Brooke snorted in response purely to Silky’s own mirth, a small thought set off a little drip of dread that threatened to put out the excitement that had only just begun to burn in her chest.

“Where is Crete again?”

Silky let out an unimpressed breath from her nose. “Bitch, you got all the geography skills of a Love Island contestant. It’s just off the Greek coast. Kinda near Turkey too, but it’s Greece.”

Brooke felt her heart drop, Alton Towers Oblivion all over again. She blinked quickly, tried to hide her discomfort. “Well, we’re not going there.”

Silky gave a small sigh, a little hint of resignation or long-suffering to it that Brooke didn’t appreciate. But when she reached over the table and patted her hand on top of Brooke’s, she felt a little bit more understood, a little bit more validated.

“B, Greece is a big place.”

It was the exact same thing Brooke herself had thought earlier, except now it didn’t seem true. Now, with the prospect of going there, it seemed like the tiniest microcosm of society. The world was simultaneously too big and too small, and Brooke felt the cold drip in her heart get worse. “Silky…”

“Look. We ain’t exactly gonna pick the same place she’s at, are we?”

Brooke put her head in her hands and sighed. “She’s not there anymore.”

“What?”

“I phoned the hotel a week ago to try and speak to her. I was going to fly out, try and talk to her and fix things. They said she didn’t work there anymore. So I don’t even know where she is at all.”

Silky huffed, frowning and concerned. “I’m sorry, Brooke, this shit must’ve been hell.”

“You’ve got no idea.”

There was a pause as Silky pushed her food around her plate. “Crete’s small, but it ain’t that small. We still got a one in a million chance of bumpin’ into her if we go.”

“That’s still too small for my liking. Both the island and the chances.”

“Aight, one in a billion. Trillion. Point is, it ain’t gonna happen. An’ besides…” Silky waggled her eyebrows, flashing her phone screen at Brooke again. “Twenty pounds for the first week of the school holidays. This shit’s like gold dust.”

Brooke smiled slowly in spite of herself. Maybe Silky was right. And maybe it would be fun to swan around Greece, eat seafood and pretend to be in some knockoff version of Mamma Mia. Scratch that, it would be fun. She’d get to spend a week surrounded by her friends in the sun, which was what she badly needed at the moment.

Brooke was nodding before she knew it. “Okay, fine. Crete it is.”

“YES, bitch!” Silky cheered, loud enough to be heard by the entire restaurant and possibly the chefs in the kitchen too. “Now let’s get dessert. All this wine needs soaked up by a big slice of sticky toffee puddin’.”

It was easy to feel optimistic with Silky back being her loud and just-the-right-side-of-obnoxious self, and with a plate of tiramisu in front of her. But after they’d finished up, paid their bill and she’d hugged Silky goodbye at the train station, Brooke found the endorphins wearing off as she got back to her dark flat and into her cold bed. Maybe it was because she was finally coming down from the high of meeting up with a beloved friend, maybe it was because she knew she had another monotonous, greyscale day of work to get through tomorrow.

Or perhaps, Brooke thought as she turned over in bed, caught sight of the familiar rose-gold frame and blew it a kiss, she was simply missing her girlfriend.

If she could even call Vanessa that any more.

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

Hey can we get some relationship headcanons with lady, trish and lucia? Thank you moosh! 💝💝💝

Possible tw: talking about Lady's survivors guilt because Arkham is a piece of purple blobby shit. 

Lady 

Lady is without a doubt a very strong woman, after having to deal with everything her father caused at the tower and everything that lead up to it including the murder of her mother, to killing him and slowly recovering from the guilt the best she can and suffering from it all even to this day, and that's not even getting into her successful career as a devil hunter. Even with how hard her life has ever since the death of her mother, Lady is strong and has learned how to treat her mental wounds and how to move on as best as she can. She's especially pleased now that she has the rest of the crew and you to call as family. You are very lucky to have this woman at your side. 

Lady loves hunting demons, she has ever since she started her revenge against her father, so if you're in the business (which I'm going to say is likely because I don't see Lady dating a civilian without having lots of guilt about you being possibly put ton of danger because her name is pretty big with rival hunters and devils alike) expect to be hunting partners like Dante and Trish are which she finds quite amusing seeing you in action especially on big jobs where the both of you have to bust out the big guns (and in her case literally.) 

With you two being partners, both in business and romantic sense, you can expect cut on jobs to be fairly equal (sometimes with her giving you most of the cut because you're so cute) compared to whenever she teams up with the rest of the crew which she keeps most because everyone has at least a little debt owed to her, and Dante (who has the biggest ridiculous amount of debt) has bitched and whined over this fact the most before going back to pout over his strawberry sundae, which the sight makes Lady laugh every time. 

She has surprisingly really soft hands, which you would expect calluses and for her to have joint issues given how much she shoots things on a weekly basis but the woman takes good care of herself and practices regular self care so whenever she holds you hands, caresses your face, or mindlessly runs your sides when in bed her touch is very comforting. 

She likes giving attention to scars, whether it be hers or yours she likes for the two of you to trace each other's and tell the either the cool stories about the badass ones you've received from jobs or share the the mental ones and the anguishing hardships from them that will end in the two of you finding quiet comfort in each other's embrace. 

Kisses with Lady go through a variety of stages depending on where you are in the relationship. In the beginning they are quick and flustered (especially on Lady's part) then they turn into more and more confident with time as the two of you get over possible embarrassment before finally they turn into kisses that tingles your brain and makes you forget how to breathe before one of you pulls back and gives the other a cocky smirk before going back to doing whatever they were previous. 

Lady's preferable date locations are at bars, she really likes the occasional drink and it's fun to hear gossip and possible leads for potential jobs. Lady is actually a lightweight so when she does have the occasional drink be prepared to take care of the mess afterwards because she is a clingy drunk and it's actually pretty funny to hear her complain to Dante about terrible lines when her pick up lines are godlike in cringe and it's fucking adorable added with the cute shade of pink dusting her cheeks. But without fail Lady is also a bitchy nightmare when she's hungover so also be prepared so her to often harshly snap back at you the next day but know she never means the harsh words thrown your way, just let her shoot Dante a few times and she'll be good as new. 

An activity that she absolutely loves doing with you before bed is taking a shared bubble bath together. She finds it super relaxing with you leading into each other and washing each other's hair as you talk about whatever that occurred in your dangerous lives that day, also a bonus if there's music playing in the background because she loves hearing you hum along with the tune as your hands make work shampooing her hair. 

Somewhere around the time she realized things between the two of you are very serious and that the two of you are going extremely steady, does she decide that she has to be a hundred percent honest with you. She loves you and you deserve to know about the truth about the nights that she leaves you alone in bed to do whatever random thing around the apartment to distract herself from sleeping. Her haunting guilt, even though she's come to accept that what her father did wasn't her fault...the guilt still comes up from time to time, his face still imprinted in her mind. When she tells you one night before the two of you were getting ready for bed, something in her just - broke and she had to come clean. When she starts telling you the details of how her father sacrificed her mother for being a descendant of the priestess that Sparda sacrificed, how that he probably never did love either of them and that he just manipulated them both for his own plans and that sometimes she would desperately think of somehow she could've changed things and at that point each word she speaks gets harder and harder to understand before she breaks down crying. Hold her and let her sob into your shoulder and let her take all the time she needs to let it all out. Once she's calmed herself does she apologize for having to see her like this, these types of situations are hard but make sure you tell her that you love her and other comforting words that slowly give her peace of mind. Your relationship noticeably deepens that night. 

Once long further down the road of your relationship does Lady start thinking about the future. Yes she loves hunting demons but she would absolutely love to retire one day and finally settle down with you and just...somehow live a normal life. However those are thoughts for way into the future and she still hasn't had her fill yet and she's proud to have you right along with her. 

Trish 

Trish has always been since the moment she was created a woman that was very hard to get a good read on what she's feeling, she just radiates this smug badass confidence everywhere she goes whether it be hanging around the office or gracefully slaying demons. However despite this everyone who has been around for long enough knows that expressing sometimes feelings can be really hard sometimes for Trish, with her still being demon and all. That doesn't mean she doesn't feel anything; the exact opposite in fact given the dmc rules she has cried therefore she feels human emotion, so she feels a lot but given her demonic nature she doesn't know at times how to apply them and that was the one of the exact reasons why she left Dante to travel the world to do some self discovery shortly after dmc 1, so that she can learn what exactly to do with these new sensations. And with that journey it eventually leads her to having you be a major role in her life. 

Trish can be a bit unpredictable and when it comes to this they're often moments that show her devilish side off, especially on jobs (again another case of not feeling very comfortable dating a civilian) where she jumps around the battlefield, bright volting yellow electricity trailing her every movements, slashing through devils one after another and another before leaving you completely abandoned and going off on her own or with her still massacring every demonic thing that moves but this time she's looming over you almost like a predator on prey when actually she's only taking a front row seat watching you beat the shit out of demons on your end or right after the two of you slay all enemies in one area she either complements or taunts you on your kills one form the other depending on your kill count versus hers and this ends with her challenging you to a friendly spar before going any further on the current job. 

With Trish being a demon and all she has a great memory so she remembers a lot of mundane things about you, some things that even you didn't notice. She remembers all of your favorite restaurants, your favorite breakfast dishes, what preferred time you wake up, how exactly you like to be held, what tell signs that you're embarrassed, and her personal favorite: what exact words to say to see those pretty cheeks heated up. 

Her hands are fairly smooth given the healing aspect to demonic nature but uniquely her touch always has a sparking touch to it so that's something you're going to have to get use to every time your skin comes in contact with them, but after awhile you'll find comfort in it every time your hands interlock together the electricity is like a spark of a reminder that two of you are there together and alive. 

She is absolutely not afraid to spook you at times either at your place or at the office with taking on different human forms, one time she took on her Gloria form to sneak behind you while you were cleaning your pistols and tapped a few fingers along your shoulders and next thing Dante knew was there were several new bullet holes in the kitchen that he didn't remember there being before. 

You know how I talked about the electric sparks on her hands? Well that doesn't just apply there but on other parts of her as well. So that being said it's no surprise that kisses between the two of you are quite electrifying, and again something that will take time to get used to but eventually it's quite comforting. 

Trish, like Lady, loves self care and that includes going on shopping sprees so expect a lot of dates at various stores, your girlfriend with Dante's -stolen- borrowed credit card in hand getting you everything your hearts desire. 

Being a full demon Trish technically doesn't need to eat or drink anything but still she goes for the occasional pizza slice since that's usually the only food to be found at Devil May Cry, which she only does when she's bored and wants to do 'human things' however if you so happen to cook anything she will always 100% eat your food. It doesn't matter if your cooking skills would put Gordon Ramsay in an absolute shit fit, she will eat all of it and proclaim that it's the best meal she's ever had, this is a cute way she's found a small way of expressing her love. 

In the beginning of your relationship, Trish has to actually remind herself that you're human and even though you're strong you're nowhere on the same level of strength that she and Dante are on, and that even though you can handle yourself you do need protection from time to time. But she doesn't just need to remind herself that on strength but also on the emotional aspect as well. As a human you've come into this world feeling emotions, she's only felt them for a few decades which in a demons lifespan is barely anything. Trish loves you deep down and she's told you that countless times, but there are situations that you've been dragged to your absolute worst and she...has no idea what to do. She feels awful and wants to comfort you but she just doesn't know how to express that, so she can only sit there next to you and listen to you sob for hours and just feel...hopeless. Over time the two of you find a way; she confronts you about this and tells you that she doesn't want to feel hopeless without being able to express and be able to properly comfort you, which ends up with the little system of whenever you feel sad that she says next to you and holds your hand, the light bolts of electricity becoming the way of her expressing her comforting presence to you for however long you need it forehead has all the time in the world, and if you need something further feel like it feel free to cry on her shoulder and tell her everything that's bothering you, she's a great listener and her memory is great after all. 

I think out of everybody it's Dante that notices and feels Trish's feelings the most, call it a demon thing with feeling auras and such, or that he really knows his friends, or just it's possibly both. He actually prefers when Trish wants to go on jobs with you instead of him, and sure it's a little weird seeing the clone of his dead mother with someone that isn't his dad, but he really appreciates that you bring something really amazing out of his old devil hunting partner, thinking about how vastly different the demon servant that led him to Mallet Island is to the woman he sees now, and even though he doesn't comment on it the sight of the two of you excitedly bustling out of the door to go on a hell spawn killing spree always without fail gets a smile on his face. 

Lucia 

Lucia has come a long way with her self acceptance. She's artificially a demon and not human and for a good while she worried there might be a day where she might lose control of the devil inside and kill Matier and everyone else she loves and cares for, but a certain son of Sparda changed her way of thinking and now she's proud to have her powers to protect the ones she holds dear, and that includes you. She's a proud guardian of Vie de Marli and she hopes that one day she can be just as strong as Dante, and with it that's her motivation to continue to train. 

Lucia has a duty to kill demons and she views it as the way to get stronger, out of her Lady and Trish she is the one that would be alright dating a civilian although with you being a civilian that puts an even heavy weight on her shoulders to make sure the island is protected at all costs, but if she were to prefer she would rather you be a demon hunter so she wouldn't have to stress as much. 

I think Lucia would really want whoever she's interested in to be liked and respected by Matier, she is her mother after all, adoptive or not. But I really don't think there's too much to make Matier not like you, she trusts her daughter's judgment after all but still expect the cliché: "If you hurt my daughter-" speech, and despite the older woman's small figure and age this is probably the most terrifying moment you'll ever see from her. 

Lucia's, even with the healing aspect from her demonic nature, hands are fairly callused with how much she's gripped her blades over the years. Maybe it's because of her artificial status that she can heal herself quickly like all demons can but it's just not perfectly on point, she does have many scars from slip ups from the past that never fully healed that she keeps mostly hidden. 

Despite her most being present on Vie de Marli she does like to travel to the Devil May Cry office to take jobs from Morrison from here and there. It took awhile for her to feel comfortable around everyone else who was Dante bit she came around and she actually likes spending time with Kyrie when Nero brings her over. So eventually when she considers everyone in the crew trusted companions does she bring you along on one of her trips. It really does warm her heart to see you around having a fun time with these ragtag gang of colorful personalities, maybe if she has the chance and the island isn't at that much threat she could also bring Matier along? 

Kisses with Lucia are awkward at first. You're most likely her first s/o so she has absolutely no idea what to do. She had pinned feelings for Dante awhile but after seeing him in day to day situations at the office she came to learn that it would never work between them and she would prefer to stay friends, but now she has you and an actual relationship? She gets embarrassed from the slightest touch so kissing is a whole different realm for her. But of course over time and she learns to have some confidence with you she slowly becomes used to it and those awkward fumbles become slow and sweet passionate entanglements. 

Dates with Lucia on Vie de Marli mostly include late night patrols around the island, a time where it feels like it's just the two of you on the island where any type of conversation can start. But on the mainland with Dante's suggestion Lucia really likes going with you to Fredi's dinner the food there is quite different from back home and the people that work there are so nice, she once got a compliment from Cindy about how pretty she was and the shocked flushed look on her face was so adorable and precious that it's something you'll never forget until the day you die. 

Lucia when she's not on duty has a hobby carving wooden figures, the process really relaxes her. So a lot of gives from her are of beautifully sculpted animals with your name carved neatly onto the bottom of them. You end up having lots of them on shelves in your study and whenever you're sitting down doing whatever while Lucia's away they bring a nice sense of comfort like she's still there with you. Another bonding moment the two of you have is her teaching you how to carve, it's a sweet moment with her place next to you holding your hands as she instructs you what to do, all potential shyness that she normally shows gone and instead replaced by full confidence, which is always really nice to see from her. 

Lucia has long before your relationship learned to accept what she is, but there are some times where she has moments of doubt that you would be much happier dating another human instead of a devil as herself. After the two of you have visited the office a couple of times and she sees how you've become good friends with Lady that her insecurities come up and she has the thoughts of if you'd be more happy in a relationship with Lady, another human, than her, an artificial demon. With this plaguing her mind she becomes more distant, which with her not being really good at hiding when something's bothering her you notice fairly quickly. When you finally approach her about it she does come clean and tells you what's troubling her and even more than she's still doubting her strength as a guardian and isn't sure if she's able to protect you, Matier, and everyone, and even more so that even though she has demon blood (even though artificial) that she is nothing like how strong Dante is. You then tell her that her being demon or human doesn't matter, that you love her for her and that she is strong but she doesn't have to be strong for everyone she can show weakness and that everyone does, and that you know Dante is proud of how far she's come and how far she can still go. She looks at you with a mystified look before pulling you into an embrace telling you how to Sparda she's so lucky to have someone as amazing as you. 

Lucia likes to think about Sparda from time to time, with all the stories that she's managed to get out from Matier and the various things she's read in books she wonders what type of man he really was deep down to love a human woman - Dante's mother - and if what he felt about her was anything how she felt about you. 

[lovelyirony]

Fic title meme : pulvis et umbra sumus (We Are Dust And Shadows)

On every single document, including the ones that show what actually happened to Howard and Maria Stark, Tony Stark is listed as dead among them. 

He is not. 

But in not calling in the accident on the abandoned road, Tony managed to find someone else to take his place and escaped. 

Tony Stark is dead. A whole family funeral and everything. Obadiah pretends to cry. Tony is at the funeral with shitty dye in his hair and sunglasses that he wouldn’t be caught dead wearing. Ha. 

The funeral is closed casket. All their faces are rumored to be impossible to fix with make-up. 

He makes new documents. Anthony Jarvis, from Boston. Airtight background. Likes puzzles. Scored damn high on the SAT, but not the perfect score. 

(Killed him to answer some of those questions wrong, seriously.) 

Anthony Jarvis goes to MIT and requests a single room. He gets one for one semester, and then the room next to his burns and destroys his as well. So he gets moved to Jim Rhodes’. 

Jim becomes Rhodey, and he is the first friend of Anthony Jarvis, and nicknames him Tony. 

He grins at that. 

There are plenty of times that Tony wants to tell him. The thing about secrets is that they need to be shared. No one really wants a secret, nor do they want to keep it. But he keeps his mouth shut and asks if he wants to go for Thai food. 

“This is the third time this week.” 

“Not my fault it’s good! I’ll pay...” 

“Sign me up.” 

Tony and Rhodey gets Thai food. It’s good. 

Rhodey lets him in on a secret that Tony had actually known about since his room assignment. 

(You remember that guy’s room that caught on fire? Yeah, he swore that his microwave hadn’t been on, and nothing had been plugged in. He was right. But Tony needed an accident.) 

In other circumstances, Rhodey would have ignored the offer that he had. He had had his heart set on Air Force. But there was something about the man who talked to him. 

“It’s a place called Strategic-Homeland-something I can’t remember,” Rhodey says. “Point is, they’re a big deal and kind of shady, but not in the government shady kind of way. The only thing I can find out about them is that they’re an international company who need engineers, pilots, and basically anyone like you and me. I don’t know how I feel about it.” 

Tony nods. 

“You want me in on this?” 

“I mean, you did tell me a couple of weeks ago that you weren’t sure what you wanted to do after graduation.” 

(It was two weeks, three days, and fourteen hours ago. Not like he was counting.) 

“...thanks. I’ll check it out with you.” 

Anthony Jarvis shows up in a nice suit, stupid sunglasses, and impresses the higher-ups by diagnosing a problem with the engine that others had previously marked as “impossible.” 

He’s hired on the spot, same as Rhodey. 

Tony Jarvis gets his own keycard, finds an apartment in New York that’s within at least biking distance, and gets started on inventing some cute little toys for the spies in Research and Development. 

He brings the laser-lipstick to life, poison-drop-earrings, spyglasses that actually work and have HD, and briefcases that use mirroring technology to change color. 

“How did you do this?” Rhodey asks, eyes wide. “I swear this is unreal.” 

“Aw,” Tony says. “You sap. I got some inspiration from some old comic book ads. I think I’m gonna try a ring decoder next, what do you think?” 

“Almost makes me want to go on missions instead of flying them.” 

Tony Jarvis is known for working odd yet long hours. He comes up with results. And he keeps his head down and minds his own business. 

This is all to find out exactly who killed his parents. As much as his and Howard’s relationship was...interesting, he still wanted to know. 

His desire to know the truth leads to somewhere he hadn’t thought was possible: Hydra. 

His hands freeze as he looks at the paper file with thick, black lines all over. The information there was sparse. Howard, Maria, and Anthony Stark all died. It was ruled: 

And there’s nothing there. 

It wasn’t an accident. Sure he knew that, but there was something far more sinister at play. Why wasn’t it an accident? 

- 

He gets Alexander Pierce in his apartment with a man in the corner. His arm gleams in what little light from the lamps outside give off. 

“Why are you searching for the Stark files?” He asks. 

“Why didn’t you just schedule a meeting? I’m available tomorrow at three,” Tony jokes. “Who’s your friend here?” 

“Someone you wouldn’t want to shake hands with,” Pierce answers. “You need to stop looking into this before you find yourself in a situation you don’t want to be in.” 

“And if I don’t?” 

“Accidents will happen,” Pierce says. He gets up from the table, to the counter. Gets out a glass. And makes himself water. He smiles as he looks to the man in the corner. “Do you want any water, Winter Soldier?” 

Winter Soldier remains impassive. 

Tony stills. 

“So, the legends are true. And Hydra is still around.” 

“And if you aren’t careful, you won’t be,” Pierce says. “Don’t bring any of this up. Or this won’t be the last time you see Winter Soldier. I know your moves, Jarvis. Don’t think you can surprise me.” 

They exit the apartment. Tony realizes that Pierce took his glass. 

And he laughs. 

Because this? Not according to plan, but god he’s gonna have fun with it.  

It starts with telling Rhodey who he actually is. 

It does not go as planned. 

“So let me get this straight. I’ve known you for years and you just. Never told me?” Rhodey asks. “Why not?” 

“To be completely fair, no one knows besides a man in Wisconsin, and he’s from Wisconsin,” Tony says. “Also I was drunk. Drunk me is a terrible person who would sell me for a buffalo nickel.” 

“I’m still mad, even if that’s funny,” Rhodey says, trying not to smile. “So. Why tell me now? I’m assuming you need something.” 

“I would like your help,” Tony says. “It is not required but I am toppling a secret organization living in SHIELD and I think if I get your help, I will most likely not get fired by the end of this. Fury likes you, he hates me.” 

“False, he mildly tolerates you. You’ll be fine. Probably. Who else should we get to help?” 

Tony had originally planned for no one. 

But then there was Pepper Potts. 

She had been deemed by the media as “crazy” for accusing Obadiah Stane, longtime-CEO of Stark Industries, as ordering a hit out on the Stark family. 

She had been booted from the company--anticipated--and then Hydra had ordered a hit on her. 

Slightly unexpected. 

Point is, Rhodey brings her into the apartment and tells Tony casually that the grocery store had run out of his usual hummus brand, was the generic okay? 

“That’s like asking if I’m okay with blue pens,” Tony curses. “Also, is that Pepper Potts? Why is she here? Did you run into her at the grocery store?” 

“No, as I was coming back. Did you know that she has a hit out on her? Fun times.” 

“Oh my god, will someone explain to me what’s going on here?!” Pepper seethes. “I was just trying to get my yogurt without anyone taking a picture of me and some random fucking guy had a knife thrown at me and then this guy took me to your house!” 

She then rants for ten minutes about the “questionable design choices going on in this establishment, who honestly thinks shot glasses are a decoration?!” 

“Are you done?” Tony asks. “Because if you want to help with a conspiracy plot, you need to be done.” 

She is. 

Pepper does not get a job with SHIELD. In fact, she mainly just decides to take care of the redecoration in Tony’s apartment. 

“You will be paying me for this.” 

“Why would I do that? You’re using my money to buy everything. You’re living here rent free for now.” 

“Because I’m helping you make better life choices. I also want new shoes.” 

What Pepper does is provide very valuable access to Stark Industries: she knows the ins and outs, what employees do and don’t do, and also is very helpful in telling Tony what he needs to do when he takes the company over. 

“Who said I was going to take it over?” 

“Me,” Pepper says. “Also because I reviewed every single old document and the company was specified to go to next-of-kin. You are. And you’re not dead.” 

“My death certificate is literally framed,” Tony says, pointing to his graduation photo that Rhodey took. He had swapped out his official diploma with it as a joke. No one had seen it. He thought it was hilarious. 

“Yeah, but they can do DNA testing,” Pepper says. “This is like the twenty-first century Anastasia except this time they don’t find you with metal detectors!” 

“I don’t like that you know that story as well as you do,” Rhodey says. “But I’ll leave you a credit card for furniture and groceries. If you get rid of my drinks in the fridge I’m literally never forgiving you.” 

“Noted, and I don’t need forgiveness,” Pepper says. “But they’ll stay there.” 

So begins the plot. 

Pierce doesn’t know three things, which is a lot of things not to know: 

1.) Tony Jarvis is not Tony Jarvis. 

2.) Rhodey actually likes Tony and most of the time him saying that he would “kill Tony in a variety of ways, starting with sporks and moving forward...” is mostly (mostly) a joke. 

3.) Pepper Potts resides in their apartment and is having fun telling Tony she bought new silverware. 

“Why did you buy new silverware! It was fine!” 

“I recognized all of these forks and knives from restaurants. Why did you steal them from restaurants?” 

“They can replace them!” 

“Don’t. Anyways now your spoons match and you don’t have the shitty ones from different places. Also I painted the bathroom.” 

“My landlord is gonna kill me.” 

“I made her cookies and discovered that she likes going to concerts. You’ll be fine.” 

(Pepper is a goddess. You can’t convince them otherwise.) 

Pierce doesn’t know any of this, but he still holds a key piece of blackmail: Tony Jarvis shouldn’t know about Hydra, and he’ll do anything to make sure that he doesn’t lose his job. 

Tony has been recording their conversations for weeks. 

(Pierce thinks he doesn’t design things to get around the available technology. Pathetic.) 

He also has bugged Pierce as well as his house, and figures out that Winter Soldier is going to be on assignment within the DC area in an effort to kill some higher-up on the foodchain that was SHIELD. 

Well. 

Tony has always wanted to go and see the cherry blossoms a little more up close. 

Pepper, of course, doesn’t like that they left his boots on. 

“This couch is new and red,” she says. “Take off his boots!” 

“He is unconscious and probably won’t be in the next fifteen minutes,” Rhodey says. “We are not touching him and possibly shortening that fifteen minutes.” 

Winter Soldier wakes up to three faces staring at him. 

“Mission failed?” he asks, voice robotic. 

“Nope, you just got a new one,” says the man on the right. He is wearing a t-shirt. Winter Soldier thinks that in this situation, a t-shirt is not the best option. 

(Of course, he’s not supposed to think. But they don’t have to know that.” 

“Can you take your shoes off?” says the woman in the middle. “Please. You’re getting germs on the couch.” 

He’s confused. 

“Who am I killing?” 

“No one, yet,” says the man on the left. “Do you know who you are?” 

“Winter Soldier.” 

“No, like a name? I’m assuming you’ve had a name at some point.” 

“Someone has called me Mr. Freeze before.” 

The man on the left snorts. Man on the right taps his arm lightly. 

“Well, um, okay then. How do you feel about the name...aw shit. I can’t think of a name for you when your mask is on. Can you take the mask off?” 

He takes it off. It’s nicer to breathe. 

The man in the t-shirt pauses. 

“Okay. So your name is Bucky Barnes. Do you know that name?” 

Something clicked. But he doesn’t know what. 

“Sounds...familiar.” 

“Cool! So that’s your name now, do me a favor and don’t google it. I’m Tony, this is Rhodey, and this is Pepper. If you don’t take your shoes off, you’re going to be scared of her.” 

Newly-named-Bucky highly doubts that he will be scared of Pepper because she is built like a twig and she is wearing high heels. 

(He is wrong about ten minutes later when she forcibly throws a fork at him.) 

“Why am I here?” he asks. “Should I be checking back in with Handler Pierce?” 

“No,” comes the consensus from everyone else in the room. 

“Technically, he thinks you went rogue and went back to Russia. He’s organizing a team to go get you. We hired an actor to play you. It’s been entertaining. He got some plums. Do you like plums?” 

“Why is that relevant?” 

“It’s vapid and not interesting at all, Tony loves questions like that,” Rhodey says. “Now come on. We need to get you actual shirts. Also some body wash.” 

Bucky Barnes learns how to be a person. He stares at himself in the mirror for an hour and smiles slightly when Pepper calls him “vain” and pushes him aside to grab her hairbrush. 

He then learns that Hydra is trying to overtake SHIELD and they have a slight window with Pierce out. 

This involves two things: 

1.) Tony Stark coming back from the dead. 

2.) SHIELD panicking that they didn’t know this secret and taking another look at the paperwork, in which case Hydra will be found out. 

These are both easier than anticipated. Tony can act like a showman better than anyone, and has been carefully growing a goatee that is eerily reminiscent of his late father’s. Of course he’s had to switch it up. 

The media is going crazy. SHIELD as well. They’re scrambling to find paperwork that proves that it happened, and they find that the “accident” was no accident. That Howard hadn’t been working for the “enemy” at the time. 

The enemy was in the building, and they had blended in seamlessly. 

This all happens on a Wednesday, by the way. Pepper has it marked on the calendar and everything. Rhodey made his coffee. 

Bucky is busy slamming people into drywall and listening for any word from Rhodey, who is also slamming people into drywall. 

“You know, you’d think we’d get something like a suit of armor for this,” Rhodey pants out, slamming another guy out of his way. 

Bucky nods. 

“Best I can offer is a grenade.” 

“Where in the fuck did you get a grenade?!” 

“Supply closet. Second floor. What, you didn’t check?” 

“No sorry must’ve missed it--of course I didn’t fucking check the second floor closet!” Rhodey yells. 

Bucky says he’s stressed. He should calm himself. 

Rhodey chucks a particularly nasty Hydra agent out a window. 

(Bucky thinks Rhodey is probably the coolest person he’ll ever meet.) 

Tony is fashionably late to the take-down of the century. He’s already foiled a lot of plans, and taken a key-card for Project Insight to work. 

He waltzes in and nearly gets hit by a mug. 

“So, how’s the party going?” he yells over to Pepper. Pepper is still in her heels. She looks like a goddess still, as usual. It is a Wednesday, after all. 

“As fine as it can be,” Pepper says. “We’ve met some resistance. With Pierce gone there’s little infrastructure. You got his plane delayed, correct?” 

“Even better. Got it sent to London. Motherfucker is gonna be there for a while,” Tony says. “Also may or may not have said that he was a threat. SHIELD branch there will investigate, find out some questionable things in his file that he will swear up and down were never there.” 

“Good,” Pepper says. She launches a stapler at someone’s head. “Do you think we’ll have time to pick up takeout for dinner?” 

“Depends on whether or not Deputy Director Hill is Hydra.” 

They see Maria Hill pass by in a blur, yelling as she jumps onto a man and sends him crashing down over a railing. 

“Lovely, she isn’t!” Pepper cheers. “By the way, I was thinking about redoing our kitchen.” 

“‘Our’ kitchen?” Tony says, ducking a bullet and drawing out his personal lipstick-laser, firing it with expert precision. “I told you the living situation was temporary.” 

“Oh please, you have an extra room.” 

“Which was an office!” Tony tells her. 

“Like you can’t have your office at Stark Industries,” Pepper says. “I expect to hear how the reveal went over dinner. Also, please hire me back. I don’t wanna be your interior decorator for forever.” 

“Neither do I, you like modern art. Disgusting.” 

And so the fighting resumes. 

It is done by five-thirty-two, with an official surrender from Pierce. 

“Thank god, I already ordered Chinese and they said it’d be here at six,” Rhodey says. 

They all sit on the red couch. 

Shoes on. 

Tony tips four hundred percent. 

-

“So what are we doing tomorrow?” Rhodey asks. 

“I am not moving for six hours,” Bucky answers. “Also maybe getting a library card.” 

“This is the first thing you want out of the icebox? A library card?” Tony asks, laughing. 

Pepper laughs. 

“I have errands to run. You can come with me and we’ll swing by.” 

“What are the errands?” 

“Getting a kitchen mixer and also making sure that my plates match my napkins.” 

“A travesty if it doesn’t happen,” Rhodey deadpans. “Pass the lo mein, Tony. You’re hogging it.” 

“I had to fight on a Wednesday and run,” Tony says. “Today isn’t cardio day.” 

“Literally hate it when you speak,” Rhodey says. “Absolutely abhor your language.” 

They go to bed, although it’s more of laying on the floor. 

Sure, Tony will have to deal with retaking a business that he knows a bit less about and Pepper will have to be trained (again) and also fight against being made CEO (but she won’t fight much). Rhodey will get a new job with SI because it’s not like Tony will let him work at SHIELD (Rhodey tries, Tony will get him fired at some point). Bucky just...he needs to get a bit more than a library card. 

But that’s for tomorrow. 

[omgkatsudonplease]

[ficlet, bagginshield] shock and delight, pt 1 (bridgerton au)

The banks of the Brandywine River are packed with strolling couples on the day of the promenade, their chaperones following shortly behind. Thorin and the Fundinson brothers arrive exactly on time, Thorin carrying a bottle of Old Winyards. According to the sommelier in the shop at Bucklebury, this particular bottle was their last vintage one.

Bilbo and his chaperone Mr Greyhame show up a couple minutes late, the Hobbit fretting and dabbing at his brows with a monogrammed handkerchief. “I’m so terribly sorry for my lateness,” he flusters, hopping on one foot to the other like a nervous rabbit as he peers up at Thorin with a sheepish grin. “I forgot my pocket-handkerchief and had to go back for it.”

Thorin is caught between the absolute adorableness of Bilbo’s contrite pout and the absolute absurdity of the reason for his tardiness. 

“You are forgiven,” he declares instead. Bilbo’s pout smooths into a heart-melting smile.

The two of them begin to head down the path alongside the river, their pace leisurely. Other promenaders pass them by, as well as several open carriages pulled by unprotesting ponies. Thorin finds his gaze oddly drawn to the way the spring sunlight seems to burnish Bilbo’s curls into gold. Probably where Lord Stormcrow got the Golden Hare moniker, he thinks, before forcibly looking away towards a young Hobbit family having a picnic by the river. 

It’s a picture-perfect image of marital bliss. Thorin supposes something like that is what Bilbo is looking for, which Thorin himself obviously could not provide. Though he has yet to hear of any pushback against what must be an odd coupling by both Dwarvish and Hobbit standards, he is sure opposition will make itself known eventually. A marriage of true minds often lacks the productivity factor of a standard marriage, something which would be keenly felt in the family of a gentleman as distinguished as Bilbo Baggins’s. 

He, on the other hand, has already named his sister-children as his heirs. So it didn’t matter whether or not he married at all, nor did it matter whether or not his One (wherever they may be) possessed the physical apparatus or mental inclination for childbearing. 

“I have a question,” says Bilbo after a moment, breaking through Thorin’s thoughts like sunlight through stormclouds. “How do you know Gandalf? He’s an old family friend of mine, and apparently my cousin Fortinbras was the one who suggested he watch over me this season, but I don’t know how he would know you.” He looks thoughtful, hazel eyes peering inquisitively into Thorin’s face. 

In spite of himself, Thorin feels exposed, almost vulnerable. 

“I suppose Gandalf does have a lot of fingers in a lot of pies, though,” muses Bilbo after a moment, before laughing and shrugging it off. “So? How do you know Gandalf?”

“To use your phrasing, Mr Greyhame has a finger in Erebor’s pie,” replies Thorin simply, not wanting to discuss how, years upon years ago, the Wizard had found his father in the depths of the Greenwood lost in enchantments and his own memories. King Thráin had, as the story went, finally succumbed to his grief about the deaths of his father and son, and had gotten lost in the Greenwood on his way to Azanulbizar to mourn them. 

He half suspects that telling Bilbo all of that would just make the poor Hobbit run off screaming in the opposite direction. So instead he bites his tongue, folding his hands behind his back. 

“I see,” says Bilbo, fiddling nervously with one of his cuff-links. “I’ve never been to Erebor. I’ve barely even left the Shire as-is.”

Thorin arches an eyebrow, remembering the abundance of maps and walking-sticks in Bag End the first time he’d gone over for dinner. The smial, though grand in size and luxurious in room variety, didn’t have the same cold ostentation as the mansions of Dwarves or Men. It felt homey, well-loved. A testament to lives well-lived.

No wonder Bilbo was so picky about the search for his One. If Thorin were not king, he would have wanted his halls just as cosy and warm, and he would have wanted to share it with only those who would brighten its nooks and crannies. 

“You certainly give the appearance of being well-travelled,” he says neutrally, still thinking of the maps and walking-sticks.

“Within the Shire,” demurs Bilbo. “I have had to go to Annúminas on business, of course, and once I went to Fornost with my parents on holiday, but Hobbits as a rule try to stick within the four farthings of the Shire. After all, why go out to see the rest of the world when the world comes to us every year?” 

His last question is both rhetorical and bitter. Thorin’s heart aches a little just hearing it. 

“So it is a matter of respectability?” he wonders wryly. Bilbo raises an eyebrow, so Thorin explains. “There is not much stopping you from running out of your front door and into the Blue, after all.”

Bilbo chuckles ruefully. “No,” he agrees. “But every time the side of me that craves adventures begins to make plans, the other side of me protests mightily, saying I’ll miss my books and my armchair and having six regular meals a day.”

Thorin has, indeed, noticed that restaurants and tea shops in the Shire have a more constant cycle of meals than anywhere else in Middle-earth. He’s honestly not complaining. 

“Speaking of meals,” he says, nodding towards the basket that Mr Greyhame is carrying, “I brought Old Winyards. Shall we find somewhere to sit?”

Bilbo checks his pocket-watch. “It’s halfway between elevensies and luncheon,” he remarks. 

“Yes,” says Thorin. “Consider it ‘lunchensies’.”

Bilbo bursts out in laughter at that, a bright joyful sound that rings through Thorin like one of the golden bells of Dale. His own stomach flutters a bit, and it takes all of his self-control to simply gesture for Balin and Dwalin to come help them set up their picnic on the banks of the Brandywine River. 

~~

Lunchensies is a success. Bilbo immediately takes a liking to Balin the moment they all sit down on the blanket together, happily chatting with him about books and history in between bites of his sandwich. Thorin watches them, unable to stop the smile on his face as he watches the way his old friend brightens under the Hobbit’s genuine inquisitiveness. 

“Yes, the road between here and Erebor was not as arduous as it used to be,” Balin is saying. “There is, of course, the stray highway robbery within Orc territory, but rumour has it that after the Shadow was broken at the end of the last Age, the majority of the Enemy’s armies have fallen out of its thrall and prefer to keep to themselves within the Mountains.”

“Occupying the ancestral halls of Khazad-dûm,” growls Dwalin. Thorin, too, feels the cold resentment deep in his stomach, but he tempers it by watching Bilbo chew thoughtfully at his sandwich, his nose twitching like a rabbit’s.

“While Durin’s Bane continues to live, Khazad-dûm cannot be retaken,” he reminds Dwalin. 

“If it continues to live,” muses Balin, before hastily switching the topic. “On the other hand, we are fortunate not to have awoken anything similar within Erebor. Though we did almost lose it to the firedrake Smaug.”

Thorin remembers the flames, remembers the lives lost to the dragon. The tragedy had seemed insurmountable at the time, but now he supposes rebuilding a Kingdom within the ashes of dragonfire was not as bad as being forced to flee for a new home like what had happened to his ancestors in Khazad-dûm.

“Almost?” echoes Bilbo, his eyes wide. Dwalin hands him and Thorin both glasses of the Old Winyards. Mr Greyhame, too, is helping himself to a liberal portion of the wine. 

“The Lady Mika, wife of the Lord of Dale, requited her husband’s death upon the dragon by shooting him with a black arrow,” explains Thorin as he pops a strawberry into his mouth. The fruit’s juices spill over his fingers; he hastily licks it off before wiping his fingers with the handkerchief.

Bilbo’s cheeks are dusted light pink when Thorin looks up again, and Thorin can feel his own cheeks heating in response.

“Well,” flounders the Hobbit, “that must have been terrible to go through. We haven’t had anything quite like that in the Shire, save for long and fell winters and the odd plague outbreak. But enough talk of dark and grim things! What is your favourite part of Erebor?”

The question throws Thorin for a moment. “Everything,” he says, but Bilbo raises a doubtful eyebrow at that. “All of Erebor is connected,” explains Thorin. “From the mines to the forges to the crafting halls, every part serves the whole.”

“Cogs in a machine,” muses Bilbo. “But what about a location? If you’ve grown up there all your life, surely you must have a favourite place. Secret hideouts from childhood, all of that.”

Thorin considers the question again, and this time the answer comes almost as if he had always meant to say it: “My mother’s garden,” he replies. “She kept a well-tended terrace beside the Royal apartments. We still take care of it, of course, and in the spring the cherry and apple blossoms blanket the grass like petalled snow.”

Bilbo’s expression lights up. “That sounds incredible,” he says.

“In the summer, the entire terrace is flooded with fireflies. I remember thinking once as a child that they were stars come down to play with us.” 

Bilbo’s hands tighten against the stem of his wineglass. “I should very much like to see that,” he says quietly. Thorin smiles, before noticing the knowing glint in their companions’ eyes.

He glares at them until they subside. 

[f33itan]

💛⚜️Pᴀʀᴛ 1: Tᴏʀᴛᴜʀᴇ ɪs Gᴏʟᴅᴇɴ⚜️💛 (From my Wattpad)

A/N: Ok, this was something a mutual of mine said here on Tumblr, and I decided to write a oneshot about it. Might be very VERY slight angst, nothing bad enough to actually be put under that umbrella though, anyways, enjoy this, and ty for the reads! :)

CW: MENTIONS OF RAPE, DEGRADATION, AND MORE FOUL WORDS THAN USUAL. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

B/N: Your Mother's boyfriend's name

M/N: Mother's name

꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂꧁꧂

"Oi, Y/N! Go get me another pack of beer from the store!"

"Yes father!" Damn that pig looking bitch. I'm just some fucking girl, trying to protect her mom from this demon of a person! Heck, he's not EVEN a person! He's the devil himself!! Man, I wish dad was here...

When you were in about 7th grade, your real father got killed in a massacre a couple cities over. He was not only a police officer, but a great father and husband as well. He treated you and your mother amazingly, and you thought life couldn't get anymore perfect, but soon that all went down hill. After his death, your mother's health depleted and she felt empty inside. She needed somebody else to make her complete. She decided to call an old friend from high school, and next thing you know he moved in. He seemed like a nice guy at first, but soon enough he was beating you guys mercilessly, enough to leave large bruises and scars whenever you didn't do exactly what he asked, in your eyes though, it was more of an order. You hated being ordered around, but you hated your mother getting beaten around even more. It seemed like a blessing that he hasn't tried to rape her, but god knows what he'll do, he's unpredictable

With all of this happening, you decided to tell him you were doing some "extra curricular" classes in college, but what you were actually doing was taking the Hunter's Exam and learning nen. Your biological father was kind-hearted and fun to be around, but he was also strict and sometimes a bit harsh, though he always meant well. Before his passing, all three of you would go out on the weekends to train, exercise, or do something that would enhance your body power and brain power. Because of this, all of you were exceptionally smart, and bodies all well toned. Sometimes your excursions would be going to a park and practicing a sport, driving to the snow and sledding, skiing, snowboarding, and every once in a while going to another state to zip line, try animal encounters, or take a family friendly class in that state's heritage and customs.

Since you were accustomed to hard core training and events, you thought the Hunter's Exam was quite fun, and was a test to your skills. After that, you were scouted out by a strong nen user by the name of Biscuit Krueger. You and her had lots of fun training, and with her pushing your limits to the utmost best, you turned out to be a specialist.

(Whenever I imagine myself in Hunter x Hunter, this is always my nen type and stuff LMAO)

Your power was called, Black shadow. You could have up to 10 weapons on hand, completely subjected to doing your bidding. These weapons were linked to you through blood, and they were surrounded with a substance that appeared to be black mist. The weapons you most preferred to practice with and use were your katana, blood string, and scythe. You could also make a weapon yours by cutting a fingertip and letting the blood drip onto the weapon, altering the appearance then gaining that black "mist", showing that it was now yours. The downside to this technique was that those "shadows and mist remnants" were your sleep. The darkness in your mind and the shadows all around you were taken and used for that power. In turn, you were always tired, yawning, and had bags under your eyes. Another plus side though was that you had a nen created chamber that had every weapon you owned. A girl can have some fun toys, can't she? You had tools for torture (whenever you took an opportunity to try it), many varieties of weapons, and of course, more snacks. But unlike B/N, you didn't have just fatty snacks. You had regeneration potions, healthy snacks, and special nen created "snacks" to help with different things, which all of these you had collected through pulling some strings. Your mother was worried, but you said it was all just college things. Yeah, just college things..

Ill make that pig bitch pay for what he has done to my mother!

Feitan POV -or whats going on with him- :

"What time, is it.."

"8 AM Fei!"

"Shut up, green eyes, too loud."

"Oh Fei don't be rude! It's mean!"

"That's, the point."

"Oh wait, Shalnark, what this?"

"What do you mean?"

"This... gold string?"

"OI SHALNARK, FEITAN, COME ERE' REAL QUICK!"

"Phinks, what, do you, want-" Phinks just ignored his question and pointed to the TV.

This is Channel 12, reporting live from York New City Town Square. People all over the city are claiming to be seeing a string tied to their left ring finger, leading them to some unknown destination! What is this string? Who put it there?-

"AY AY IM ON TV! THE STRING THINGY JUST LEAD ME TO THIS BEAUTIFUL GIRL AND NOW WERE DATING! SUPER AWESOME!"-

I apologize for the interference, but this string appears t be leading people to.. partners? Soulmates? Find out tomorrow morning, this is Amy Starwick from Channel 12, signing out.

"What. The. FUCK."

"OH MY GOD OH MY GOODNESS HOLY SHIT FEITAN YOU HAVE A SOULMATE!!"

"Nope-"

"YESS YOU DOOOOOOO"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP CHEERY BITCH-"

"No❤️" Since Feitan was on his last nerve with Shalnark, he decided to stomp over towards Chrollo in the main room, but Chrollo just chuckled.

"Wanna go find your soulmate? See if that things real?" Feitan just stared at the ground, lightly shifting his feet.

"Go ahead, I don't mind."

"Just, doing it, out of, curiosity."

"Mhm, curiosity, go find them." And with that, he was dismissed. Feitan wanted to say it was curiosity, but deep down he had this feeling there was something else, but what was it? It made his stomach tingle and he didn't like it one bit. He tried to ignore all of this, and just shrugged it off...

꧁꧂꧁꧂TimeSkip to Next Day꧁꧂꧁꧂

Your POV + some Feitan POV:

"Alright, today's the day, he'll be at his work, and on his break, i'll set the plan in motion.." Both me and mom don't like him, and I don't know about her, but I sure hate him, every ounce of him. The plan is simple: 1. Capture mom's boyfriend, 2. Take him to an abandoned building, 3. Torture him and get all of the answers I need, and 4. Kill him. His break is at 12, and he usually goes to get takeout every other Friday, what a pig. I'll give him a taste of his own medicine.

Time: 11:30 AM

Ok, I have everything ready. Fully energized to the utmost extent, Elixirs to bring him back in case he passes out too early, and- what? He's leaving for lunch early? PERFECT! You ran behind some buildings and hid in a two-way alleyway, waiting for him to pass by...

Here we go..

One..

Two..

THREE!

You covered his head with a sack, and took his phone out of his back pocket. Before heading over to your post, you laced the inside of the sack with some sleeping powder and pressed it against his nose and mouth. Within moments he passed out, and you typed in what you hoped to be his password, which was correct. Around 12:30, you were going to text one of his coworkers that he would be "going to a restaurant across town, and ditching work for a day, not wanting to see his stupid good for nothing girlfriend or his dumb daughter." You knew he called you both this because of going through his text messages when he wasn't looking or when he was sleeping. Little did you know that somebody was watching you from afar.

"Hmm... So, she, my, what do people, call it.. soulmate? Seems, interesting..."

Time: 12:00 PM

"Jesus, I new he was a fat ass but I didn't know he weighed this much!" You were tugging him from his legs through the back ways of York New. You wanted to find a secluded area, where once you were done with him you could just toss him somewhere for the birds and maggots to eat. After walking for what seemed like hours, you came across a set of abandoned buildings, specifically the one you laid out some extra things. A couple extra weapons, some towels, a change of clothes, a chair and some rope, a couple of flashlights, and of course, some snacks. Lucky for you, the douchebag you've been dragging around like a rag doll was still out cold, so you picked him up and tossed him on the chair, tying his wrists, ankles and neck to the chair.

"Maaannn, this is boring!! When the hell are you gonna wake up?!" As if on queue, you saw his eyes start to flutter open, and you immediately grabbed your box cutter. It wasn't a weapon used by your nen, but it was quite effective.

"What.. who.. wait- Y/N!? WHAT THE FUCK?! UNTIE ME NOW BEFORE I BEAT YOUR ASS!!" you didn't notice it, but Feitan was watching from the building over.

What, the fuck? Why she kidnap him? That pig? Why? Confusing, gotta keep, watching.

You shoved the box cutter into his left cheek, and you bathed in the glory of hearing his screams of pain.

"How does this feel, you bitch? Everything you've done to my dear mother, everything you've done to me, and heck, YOU WERE PROBABLY BEHIND MY DAD'S MURDER DURING THAT FUCKING MASSACRE!!" B/N noticed the tears in your eyes, and took this to his advantage.

"So what if I was? Both of your parents were pathetic anyways."

"NO THEY AREN'T! YOU'RE THE REASON WHY MY MOTHER'S LIKE THIS NOW! YOUR THE FUCKING REASON FOR EVERYTHING SHITTY THAT'S HAPPENED TO ME!!"

"Heh, hehe.. hahaHAHAHA! YOU KNOW GOD DAMNED WELL THAT ALL OF YOU ARE PATHETIC! WANNA KNOW WHY I GOT WITH YOUR MOM!? BECAUSE SHES HOT. AND SHE HAD GOOD MONEY FROM YOUR FUCKING DAD. YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS GONNA DO?! YOU KNOW WHY I TOOK OFF EARLY TODAY?! I WAS GONNA RAPE YOUR MOTHER AND MAKE YOU WATCH, THEN KILL BOTH OF YOU AND RUN OFF WITH ALL OF YOUR MONEY!! AND YOU KNOW WHAT'S IRONIC?! I DON'T HAVE ONE. SINGLE. FUCKING. REGRET. IF IT WASN'T FOR YOUR DAD, YOU SOULDN'T HAVE HAD THE NERVE TO DO THIS, YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN ABORTED!!"

You couldn't handle this anymore, tears were falling down your face rapidly as you grabbed the duct tape and closed his mouth shut.

"I don't give a fuck about what you say.. I'm going to kill you here. This is your grave. Someday, I'll join you in hell, and when I do, I'll torture you again, and the Devil will laugh. You just watch and ducking wait you, you.. PATHETIC WORTHLESS PIG ASS SLOPPY ASS NASTU FUCKING BITCH!" With that, you grabbed a couple super worms in each hand and shoved them into his ears. Even with the duct tape, you could hear his screams of agony as the worms dug deeper into his ears. You then got our your katana and slashed him across the stomach, and shoved even more worms into that open wound of his. Quickly, you poured a large bottle of the elixir you had brought over him to keep him from dying so quickly. Box cutter still in hand, you carved small lines all over his arms and legs, then ripped off the tape to hear his desperate cries. You imagined he wanted to be dead, but you didn't care. His pain and you pain mixed together and you just started laughing. You through your head back and let yourself laugh. all of the pain this man has caused you and your mom will be repayed today.

But the pressure and stress was too much to handle. Your laughing of victory soon turned into screams and more tears, as you let yourself fall to the ground, not even noticing you didn't hit it hard, something had caught you, or someone..

What the shit am I doing?

Am I really going to kill him?

What's wrong with me?

What will mother think?

What would dad do?

What am I doing with my life?

You soon snapped out of all of those negative thoughts though, as you noticed something caressing your face lightly.

"Rest, now. He, won't die, so quickly. I'm, Feitan." You were a sniffling and crying mess, so all you could do was rush into Feitan's chest and cry. Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around you and held you close. He had no idea what he was doing, for he had only seen this kind of skin on skin contact in movies. So, he did what those people in the movies did.

"Don't, worry... It's all, going to be.. okay."

Word Count (Including author notes, etc) : 2251

-Wrote February 3, 2021-

Unedited sorry about that lol-

Part 1...

[johannstutt413]

(requested by calligomiles)

“Alright, Kit-Kat, you can do this.” Swire leaned over her sink, looking at herself in the mirror. “You met a cute girl at the bar yesterday, she and her friends thought you were cool, and now you get to take her out somewhere nice and show her that’s true. You’re cool, right? Yeah, you are. So there’s nothing to worry about. She’ll be here soon, and-”

*Knock knock* “Swire? Sorry if I’m a bit early, I just couldn’t wait to see you again!”

“Shit she’s here already.” The Feline ran a brush through her hair one last time and tried to rein her heartbeat in as she walked out of her bathroom and out to answer her front door.

“Hi!” There was the blonde Ursus girl, in all her cutesy glory. “Ready to go?”

She nodded. “Definitely! Have you had sushi before, by any chance?”

“No, but I know someone who makes it,” Gummy replied, practically a living beam of sunshine walking beside her.

“Oh! Well, I grabbed us a couple seats at a Lungmen steakhouse; the chef there is absolutely amazing, and I can show you the ropes while we’re there.” Thinking about that made her blush. “I mean, like, how to order and stuff.”

The chef giggled. “I figured that’s what you meant. You can relax, Swire.”

“Right, right.” All she heard was ‘try harder,’ and so she would.

It was a bit of a walk to the restaurant, so they made small talk: how work had gone that day, thoughts on the upcoming mission rotation (they were slated for fieldwork soon), that sort of thing. Along the way, Swire felt herself gaining ground, recovering a measure of self-respect in the way she responded, until they finally arrived at the restaurant, and she had enough faith in herself to carry on the night as a mature, put-together member of society.

“Good evening.” The Feline smiled at the front desk person. “Two seats around the grill, please.”

“Of course. Back left side; feel free to order whenever you like.” They passed along two menus as Gummy and Swire continued inside.

Immediately upon seeing the man at the grill, the Ursus gasped. “This is his place! I thought it was, but I wasn’t sure, but he’s working tonight! How convenient!”

“I did a little research.” Complete and utter lie; she’d just wanted sushi. “Those should be our seats there.”

“Great! Hey, when she said we order whenever we like, do we just need to get Jaye’s attention?”

Swire nodded. “It’d be rude to shout at him, so raise your hand when he’s looking in your direction once you know what you want. You know him pretty well, then?”

“Yeah! We work together at the cafeteria on lunch shift when we’re serving fish meals; he does the fillets, Bagpipe makes fries, and I prep the other sides. He looks a lot meaner than he is.” Gummy looked at the menu, but her head started to spin soon after. “Wow...So many options...”

“If I could make a suggestion?” The Feline pointed to the ‘Lungmen Street Specials’ section.

The chef cocked her head. “‘Street specials?’ This is what he serves at his cart, right? They let him serve that here?”

“There’d be riots if they didn’t,” she chuckled briefly before clearing her throat. “His balls are a great appetizer.”

“...” Rada held in her laughter for all of five seconds before bursting out laughing, clapping her hand on the counter and lifting it high between every other impact to avoid the third-slap power chop- 

-which summoned Jaye to their section. “Good evening, Miss Swire, Miss Gummy. Enjoying yourselves?”

“Oh, very much, Mister Jaye,” Gummy beamed back. “You can order first, dear, I’m still deciding.”

“I’d like my usual order, please.” The Feline grinned confidently.

The fishmonger nodded. “Order of fishballs and a small variety platter. Miss Gummy?”

“I’ll have what she’s having.” She was still giggling. “One question, though: are fishballs an appetizer or a meal?”

“They are whatever the customer needs them to be, Miss Gummy.” And with that, he drifted back to his workstation.

Swire was doing her best to stifle a laugh. “I can get us something to drink while he’s working on those.”

“Oh, thank you! I was going to get up in a little bit for that.” Rada thought for a moment. “Do they have alcohol here?”

“They have sake,” she replied casually.

The Ursus blinked. “That’s how you say it?”

“Indeed.” The Feline’s ojou side was running things while her softer side was rolling on the floor of her cranium. “Shall I get us a bottle?”

“Ooh, yes, please! It’s not a proper meal without a little bit to drink.”

The walk to the bar gave her enough time to release her pent-up excitement; right now, she wanted to skip and jump like a fool, but now wasn’t the time. She called her dear! On their first date! That’s the most progress she’s made in one night since college! Feeling good, she approached the bartender, wallet in hand, and gave him a bright smile. “Good evening! One bottle of sake and a pair of masu, please.”

“A pair? You have a date tonight, then, Miss Swire?” He returned the smile as he grabbed the bottle and box-shaped cups. “I hope she realizes how lucky she is.”

“Oh, stop that; I’m on top of the world already.” She handed him a large bill as he set a tray on the counter with everything she needed on it.

The bartender took the bill, ogled at the size, and set it aside. “Are you sure you don’t want change?”

“Nope! Keep it!” The Feline sauntered off. “Have a good one!”

“You, too...especially since you just tipped over a week’s wage for one bottle...”

Swire didn’t hear that, though, as she swaggered back to her seat with the tray; their food had already arrived, but Gummy had started eating yet. “Oh, you waited for me? You didn’t have to do that, Gummy.”

“I didn’t want you to miss anything, though!” The Ursus beamed at her. “You can call me Rada, by the way.”

“Rada, Rada...where have I heard that before? Anyway, we should start with a toast, I think. Tradition says I pour your first cup, and you pour mine.” The Feline opened the bottle and did just that before passing off the sake to the chef.

Rada gingerly held the bottle as she poured. “How often do you come here, Swire?”

“Oh, every now and again.” If you counted delivery orders, every day. She’d picked up her glass by this point. “Why do you ask?”

“When Jaye set our food down, he mentioned something about taking you to the convenience store for a snack afterwards? Do you know what that means?”

No...No, he DIDN’T. “I have an idea of what he meant. Son of a bitch.”

“Oh, is it bad?” Gummy frowned. “Sorry, I didn’t know.”

“No, no, it’s not like it’s bad, it’s just-” Her arm, deciding it was time for her to take a drink, moved despite the fact her mouth was still moving, which had the unfortunate result of causing her to gargle sake. Trying to get a grip on herself, she accidentally set her glass hand on the tip of the tray, causing it to tip-

And sending it, and her, crashing onto the floor as gravity and inertia worked themselves in knots to embarrass her. From the ground, the Feline sneezed. “Every time,” she muttered, not quite able to stop tears from coming to her eye.

“...Excuse me, waiter? Two to-go boxes, please?” Rada pulled out a decently-sized LMD stack from her wallet, set it on the counter, and hopped off her chair to kneel next to Swire. “We should get you home, dear.”

“Sorry I made a mess,” she managed, wiping at her face with her damp-but-not-soaked left sleeve.

Gummy just smiled at her. “You’re a lovely mess in my book. Ah, the to-go boxes. I’ll pack this up, and then we can go back to your place. Sound good, Kit-Kat?”

“He really did tell you, huh...” Swire sighed, standing up. “It’ll do.”

“Great! We can watch TV while we eat that way. Besides, it’ll- nope, it’s probably still too early for that.” The Ursus’ face burst into a tomato-red blush.

Unfortunately for, the money-cat was focusing entirely on her. “Besides?”

“Um...I’ll tell you later.” She glanced around the restaurant before leaning closer to whisper, “But since you have to wash your clothes, it’ll be, um...easier.”

“Oh!...Ohhhhh.” The Feline was blushing too, now.

Maybe she hadn’t needed to worry about being the mature one after all.

[more-pokeimagines]

Stone cold body [02] - Chapter 1

A/N: Thank you for your feedback on the prologue, I’m really happy that you like the story so far! I hope you enjoy the first chapter as well. It got a lot longer than I expected when I started it but I like the way it turned out. Feedback is always appreciated.

Warnings: none

Present

You were absolutely sure that it was going to be a great day. The sky was bright blue and cloudless, the air warm enough that you decided to leave your hoodie in the car. You took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet scent of the bushes and flowers that surrounded the old market square in the center of Wyndon.

It was the fourth day of your road trip, together with your best friends Hop and Gloria. You had known them both since your very first day of school and you quickly became so inseparable that people referred to you as the Siamese Triplets. You never spent a day, sometimes not even an hour without each other, almost as if you were attached to each others' hips. Later on, everyone, including your parents, called you the Chaotic Trio, mostly because Hop loved to play pranks on other people and always put you and Gloria up to keep watch while he prepared everything. School had been great with your friends by your side. You had always been there for each other, even when Gloria and Hop got together a few weeks before your final exams, and when they asked you if you wanted to go on a road trip with them right after graduation, you simply couldn't say No.

So far, everything had been perfect. You had spent a lot of time exploring the cities surrounding your home town, visiting ruins of ancient castles and underground vaults that had been abandoned centuries ago but besides that, you also went for a stroll around town more than once because Gloria loved shopping more than anything else. You, on the other hand, weren't a big fan of it, just like Hop, but since you wanted your friends to enjoy your holiday as well, you were more than fine with striking a compromise. If Gloria agreed to visit old, dusty places with you, you could definitely spend some time in a boutique without complaining.

“Hey, (Y/N).” Hop's voice snapped you out of your thoughts. He pointed towards the fountain in the middle of the square and held his phone up. “I'm taking a picture of Gloria in front of the fountain, do you wanna join her?”

You shook your head. While Gloria never missed an opportunity to upload photos from your trip to her personal social media account, you liked to keep everything a bit more private. You also weren't the biggest fan of seeing yourself in a photograph, so you usually made sure that you stayed as far away from Gloria as possible when she started snapping photos. In the past, it had happened more than once that she managed to take a picture when you weren't looking, so you had promised yourself to be extra careful in the future.

While Gloria was posing in front of the fountain, making faces at Hop who giggled behind his phone, you wandered around on the square. It was surrounded by a variety of restaurants, cafés and cute, little shops that sold all kinds of souvenirs and hand-crafted goods like candles, jewelry and small paintings of Wyndon's old town. You took a few minutes to inspect one of the paintings. It showed the square in the middle of winter, the fountain covered in snow.Everything looked peaceful and calm, not as busy and overcrowded as during the summer months.

You knew that Wyndon was famous for its history. The royal family had lived and died here, many, many years ago when the growing city had been surrounded by woods and wild nature. People could still visit the King's castle and explore the ruins up on the hill on the left side of the old town. The square you were currently visiting had been the commercial center back then; people came from far and wide to sell their goods or to bask in the King's favor when he and his guards visited the market.

But the historical value of Wyndon wasn't the only reason why people still traveled here. Most of them didn't even care about the castle or the various museums about the royal family. No, Wyndon was still the magical center of Galar, no matter how modern and developed the city was. Of course almost no one practiced magic anymore, as most sorcerers had been killed during the Great Hunt nearly three centuries ago. But there were still people out there who believed that their descendants would bring the magic back one day.

Utter nonsense, at least in your opinion. The magic had disappeared when the King had burned the last sorcerer at the stake, and it would never return. People didn't need magic anymore, they had machines and other technical playthings to solve their problems. But of course the whole story was still a nice magnet for tourists – even you couldn't deny that.

You sat down on a bench next to a souvenir shop while you waited for Gloria and Hop to finish their photo session. It was fun to watch them though, making faces at each other and striking the most exaggerated poses. Obviously, they were having fun, and you couldn't help but laugh when Gloria tried to climb onto the railing that surrounded the fountain to get a better shot. Hop was laughing too. “Stop it,” he said. “I'm not going to help you if you fall.”

Gloria grimaced at him once again but eventually, she let go of the railing and returned back to his side to have a look at the photos. You watched her scrolling through her camera roll, sometimes deleting a picture she didn't like while Hop was peeking over her shoulder to make an occasional comment about the photos. “That's pretty,” he told her and pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. Gloria giggled. “Don't be stupid. I look like a scarecrow.”

“You always look like a scarecrow, so that's not really a surprise,” you said and put on the most innocent smile as Gloria flashed her eyes at you. “Oh shush, will you.”

You blew her a kiss. “I love you too.”

*

Half an hour later, the three of you sat in a café right by the old market square. Gloria still hadn't decided which photo she wanted to upload to her social media accounts and therefore was busy with her phone while Hop and you discussed the plans for the next few days. Because there was so much to see in Wyndon, you had decided to spend more than just one day here but now, you needed to figure out which places you actually wanted to visit. Originally, you had planned to skip the history museums and just visit the castle. As far as you knew, there was a temporary exhibition about Galar's history and the royal family, so it should be enough to go there instead of spending hours in different museums.

“It would be a waste of time to travel all the way to Wyndon and then not even visit the castle,” you said and took a sip from your coffee. Next to you, Hop nodded. “Yeah, right. I mean, our teachers told us so much about it that I really want to see it. I bet it's absolutely impressive.”

“True,” you replied. Since Wyndon's council spent tons of money every year to preserve the castle, you were sure that it was still as stunning as in the past when the royal family had lived there. You had caught a glimpse of it when you entered the city. It was located on a hill a few kilometers away from Wyndon, surrounded by a thick palace wall and a few tall trees that towered over the building.

Across the table, Gloria let out a dreamy sigh. “Don't forget that we need to pay the prince a courtesy visit too.”

Right, the prince. You had almost forgotten about him and the stupid legend that surrounded the statue in a nearby park. To you, it still was incomprehensible that there were a lot of people out there who believed that the prince had been turned into stone a long time ago but the fact that they were convinced that his soulmate would be able to break the curse was far more idiotic.

“Really?” you asked, barely containing yourself from rolling your eyes. You knew that Gloria was a hopeless romantic and that she loved stories like that but up to this point you hadn't expected her to be so passionate about it. “You know that it's just a story someone made up to attract tourists, right? There's nothing magical about that statue.”

You hadn't planned to sound so hostile and when you realized that both Hop and Gloria eyed you curiously, you took a deep breath and added, “I'm sorry but you know that I don't believe in stuff like that, all magic aside.”

“I don't think it's true either,” Hop tossed in. “But who says that it's impossible? It's proven that there were powerful sorcerers in Galar a long time ago, so who knows?”

Gloria beamed at her boyfriend, obviously happy about the fact that he sided with her. “See, (Y/N), even Hop wants to see the statue.”

You held back a sigh. There was no reason for behaving like that, you knew that, but a part of you wanted to refuse to visit the statue so bad that you almost felt like you were going crazy. You had no idea why you disliked Gloria's idea so much and yet, you couldn't help but try to find an excuse why you didn't want to join them.

The next second, you scolded yourself in your thoughts. You were acting like a child; it made absolutely no sense that you wanted to stay here while your best friends went to see the statue – it had been your idea to travel to Wyndon, after all.

“Okay,” you finally said and tried to give both Hop and Gloria a smile. “Let's go.”

*

It didn't take you long to arrive at the small park where the statue was located. Only fifteen minutes away from the old town of Wyndon, and still you felt like you had just entered a fairytale world. Winding paths, carefully arranged and yet untamed flowerbeds, the branches of giant weeping willows hanging over ponds that were covered with water lilies. And somewhere in between all of that – the statue.

The history books told that the enchanted prince's sister Carlina had built the park as his final resting place after he disappeared because he had always loved to be surrounded by beautiful things. You weren't too sure about that but even you had to admit that the park was one of the loveliest things you had ever seen. The only thing that disturbed the peace was the massive amount of tourists. They were everywhere, chatting with each other and taking quick snapshots of their surroundings to show them to their friends and family at home. Some of them were already rushing to the center of the park to see the famous statue, their phones and cameras ready.

Once again, you sighed quietly. You weren’t too fond of overly crowded places like this but since you didn’t want to spoil the party, you forced yourself to smile at Gloria when she appeared next to you. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” she asked in a hushed tone.

You nodded. “Yeah. I just wish there were less people here.”

“I know,” she sighed and rolled her eyes. “It will take forever til we can take some selfies with the statue. But I really want to see if the story is true, so… come one, let’s go. We have to hurry if we don’t want to wait for hours.” With that, Gloria linked arms with you and smiled. “Ready to go?”

You let her drag you along without complaining, especially since you knew that it would be useless to talk back to her at this point. When it came to things like that, Gloria always got her way, no matter what others told her, and while you usually admired her for her willpower, you weren’t sure what to think about it in moments like this.

As you followed her through the park, occasionally admiring your surroundings, you found yourself thinking about the legend again. You knew that magic existed in this world and that there had been people who were able to cast powerful spells but still, you couldn’t imagine that the rumors about the statue were true. Even if someone actually managed to turn the prince into stone, it was absolutely impossible that he was still alive after all these years. The whole story about his soulmate redeeming him was just something that people made up to attract more tourists. And apparently, it worked pretty well: hopeless romantics came from all over the country to see if they were the one to save the prince.

And then, the statue appeared in front of you. It was smaller than you had expected, and the material looked oddly similar to withered marble, not actual stone. The expression on his face was hard to read but his posture was easier to understand. He was on his knees, his right arm outstretched, as if he had tried to reach for someone to help him, and you suddenly felt a lump in your throat. You hadn’t expected to feel sorry for him.

Don’t be stupid, (Y/N), you told yourself quietly, it’s just a statue. There’s no need to be sorry.

But there was another feeling too. You couldn’t quite put your finger on it but you couldn’t deny that you felt something else than pity… a strange kind of satisfaction you couldn’t explain. A moment later, a thought that definitely wasn’t yours crossed your mind. He got what he deserved.

You shook your head in confusion; then you brought your attention back to the statue. Two girls were posing next to the prince; one wrapped her arms around him and the other one rested her head on his stony shoulder as another girl quickly took some pictures of them.

Next to you, Hop huffed and nudged you with his elbow. “Wanna bet that they thought something would happen?”

“Everyone here thinks that something is going to happen when the right person touches him,” you answered drily. “But hey, what do I care.”

“Shh,” Gloria interrupted you. “You’re way too pessimistic today, (Y/N).”

“You’re next,” you said. Not exactly the answer she was expecting, you could see that in her eyes, but thankfully, she turned away nevertheless and made her way towards the statue as soon as the other girls left. She patted the prince’s head. “Hey there.”

Hop laughed. “Ready?”

“Yep!” She threw herself into a pose, then into another one and in the end, she even got to her knees to act like she was pressing a kiss to the statue’s cheek. Then, she winked at you. “Wanna try it too, (Y/N)?”

You shook your head. “I don’t want to take a photo.”

“Of course you do! Come on, it’s fun.”

“It could be a nice memory,” Hop said. You raised your eyebrows. “Really? You’re stabbing me in the back?”

“It’s just a photo,” he added, pretending he didn’t hear your interjection. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he gently shoved you forward. Gloria quickly grabbed your arm before you could move backwards again and poked you in the ribs. “Just one photo, please.”

You rolled your eyes. “Okay, okay. But I don’t want to see that anywhere on social media, do you understand?”

She nodded, already making her way back to Hop and pulling her camera out of her backpack. “Don’t just stand there,” she said. “Put your arm around him or something like that.”

With a forced smile, you put your hand on the statue’s shoulder.

The camera clicked; you felt something crumble right underneath your fingers, and suddenly it was not longer stone you were touching but soft fabric. The next thing you knew was that someone stumbled right into your arms, dragging you to the ground with them.

Next / Masterlist

[jihyuncompass]

Hello, Stranger

Day Five! This week is going by SO fast. This is a strange AU idea I’ve had for a while, and well when I saw the prompt, I couldn’t help myself. I hope you enjoy! 

Jihyun Week 2020 Day Five ( @mysme-events​ )

Rain

Jihyun Kim x MC 

Word Count: 3.5k

Summary: During a late night walk, and a rainstorm. You meet someone new. 

You couldn’t sleep. Tossing in turning in bed you couldn’t force yourself to rest even if you tried. By this point you’d tried most everything you could think of, tea, melatonin, ASMR videos but nothing had managed to get you to sleep. Your mind raced with thoughts and concerns. The longer you laid there the more worried you felt and the harder it became to calm down enough to feel any kind of relaxation.  

After a while you pulled yourself out of bed, accepting that you might just not be able to sleep at all. Leaning against your windowsill you looked out onto the dark street in front of you. Feeling the coolness of the glass against your fingertips. Maybe what you needed was some fresh air, something to clear your mind. 

In the dark you pulled on some clothes, opting for something warm but not too heavy. You weren’t going to stay out too long. Putting your necessities in your pockets you walked outside and down the street. Taking in the cool air around you. 

No one was outside with you. The sidewalk was completely abandoned. The lights inside the apartment buildings are completely dark. Only the streetlights to guide you. In the time you’d lived where you did you hadn’t explored too much but you did know there was some kind of park a little ways down the road. Maybe that would be a nice place to sit and hang out for a while until you started to feel a bit tired. 

The park was empty when you sat down on a bench. A few cars drove past but for the most part it was entirely silent. Looking up at the sky you couldn’t see any stars, either from the light pollution, or clouds blocking your view. 

A sigh escaped your lips, sitting out here, your thoughts went to everything taking up space in your mind. You hoped you’d be able to escape the stress going on in your wife out there, but instead found it worse and more intense than before. 

You were brought out of your mind by the feeling of something hitting your forehead. Your eyes fluttered open to see the drops of water starting to hit your face. Loudly groaning, you covered your face. 

“Of course it had to start raining!” You said out loud to yourself. You didn’t have anything to protect you from the it and it was easily a half an hour walk back to your home. The rain began to get worse, coming down less as a drizzle and more as a storm. 

Sitting there you almost wanted to scream, now you had to walk home in the pouring rain, probably take a shower to put on clean clothes and then try and sleep again in the apartment that has been making it hard to get any kind of worthwhile rest for a long time. 

“Are you okay?” Someone asked. You turned to look at who was speaking to you. A young man was watching you, His bright mint colored hair plastered to his forehead from the rain. You sat up straight, trying not to look like a witch melting from the water. 

“I’m fine, just didn’t expect it to rain that’s all.” You shrugged. The man glanced up at the rain. 

“Neither did I.” He said, he looked up at the sky and then back at you. “But isn’t it a little late to be going for a walk in the park?” The man had asked. 

“I could say the same to you, stranger.” You said. He laughed, a bit of a quiet warm laugh. 

“I guess that’s fair.” He said. “I’m V by the way, so we aren’t strangers anymore.” 

“V? That’s a strange name.” 

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, it’s more of a nickname. Everyone just calls me V.” You nodded. “What’s your name? If you don’t mind me asking.” You looked him up and down, trying to discern if this guy is or isn’t a creep, but based on his gentle expression and the careful distance he has between you. There was something about him that made you want to trust him. 

“I’m MC.” You said. At this point the rain was soaking into your clothes, your hair absolutely dripping. “So V, what are you doing out here in the rain?” He took a small step forward. 

He pushed the wet hair out of his face. “I just got into town a few hours ago, but I wanted to walk around for a little while. Find something to eat. Though I maybe should have prepared for the rain.” You laughed at him, though gently. 

“I probably should have too.” You said. “You said you just got to town, are you visiting?” 

“I am, I travel a lot for my work, so I’m here for a few weeks.” V explained. 

“What do you do for work?” 

“I’m a photographer.” V said. A strange thought in your mind made you think that somehow you recognized his name but you pushed the thought aside. “Why are you outside in this awful weather?” 

You pushed your own hair out of the way. “I couldn’t sleep, I wanted to go for a walk. I didn’t even think about it raining.” You rubbed your hands together, the cold rain making you lose feeling in them. 

V looked up at the rain. “I don’t think this is going to stop soon, and you look like you’re freezing.” He took notice of the way you were sitting, trying to stop yourself from shivering. The rain fully soaked through everything. 

“Probably not.” You stood up from the bench. “You said you were looking for somewhere to eat?” V nodded. You stepped closer to him, leaving only a couple feet between you now. “There’s this really great little place that’s open for a few more hours. It has good food.” V looked intrigued. 

“Oh where is it?” 

You pointed down the street. “It’s about two blocks that way, you walk straight for two blocks then take a left. It’s the one with the old fashioned neon sign. It’s hard to miss.” You explained to him. He nodded, mentally taking note of your directions, then an idea struck him. 

“Would you like to come with me?” He asked. You were taken aback by his sudden request. 

“I would hate to intrude.” You said but V shook his head. 

“Not intruding at all, I wouldn’t mind the company at all.” You opened your mouth then closed it again. A part of you thought maybe you should say no, but based on the way he was looking at you and the way he spoke. Something stronger told you to accept his request. 

You shrugged and then nodded. “Okay, I’ll go with you.” He smiled and stepped to the side motioning to you. 

“Then show the way.” You started to walk, V finding his stride beside you. 

Together you walked through the rain quickly, the two of you were already soaked to the bone but the sooner you could get inside the sooner you could warm up and dry off a bit. 

“So why do you like this restaurant so much?” V asked after a minute of walking. 

“It’s not too far from where I live and it has a really good atmosphere to it.” You explained to him. “Also it’s open really late so it’s a good place to go when you need a late night fix.” He nodded. 

“Do you have many nights like these? Where you’re awake late at night?” You shrugged, thinking about your answer for a few moments while you waited for the crossing sign to change. 

“Not as many as I used to, but I still have enough of them.” You said, the light changed. Both of you walked across the crosswalk. “Though usually I’m smart enough to remember an umbrella.” You pointed out where to take a left and changed directions. 

Once you spotted the neon sign the two of you were practically booking it to the door. Someone standing outside the restaurant laughed, watching the two of you running towards the entrance completely soaked. 

“Had to park far away huh?” The guy laughed holding open the door for the two of you. 

“Something like that” You said, the two of you going inside. 

V stood and took in the restaurant for a second. The neon lights inside gave everything a redish glow. Tables were mostly empty at the time. The walls were lined with black and white photos, showing a variety of people. Strange knick knacks lined shelves. The restaurant itself was small, but gave off a warm and slightly eclectic vibe. 

“Good god the two of you are drenched!” A server said leaning against the bar. “Sit down, do you want coffee?” You both thanked her profusely and sat down, shedding off soaked jackets not meant for the rain. Sitting in the restaurant you were able to get a better view of V than outside. You saw just how bright his eyes were, the same color as his hair. You couldn’t deny that he was a handsome guy, and seeing him almost took your breath away a bit. 

“This place is very unique,” V said looking around. 

“It has its own style, I like that about this place.” You explained. “It doesn’t feel like anywhere else in the world.” V smiled and nodded listening to you. Thinking for a second you looked down at the table. “Though, you’ve probably been all over the world as a photographer. You’d probably know better than me.” 

V’s face flushed a bit. “Well, I’ve been to a lot of places for sure, but this place is definitely very different. I already like it.” You smiled at him. 

“Here’s those coffees.” The server said setting down two steaming mugs. “And here’s some menus and I’ll be right back.” She set two menus down in front of you and stepped away going back behind the bar. You both took sips from your mugs, the coffee was bitter, not the highest of quality, but what you’d expect. You watched V add some sugar to his before taking another drink. 

You set the mug down on the table holding it for warmth. “So where are you from originally V?” He set down his own mug and looked back to you. 

“Seoul, originally.” He explained. 

“You’re a little far from home then.” You said. 

“I am, but I like travelling, there’s so much this world has to offer and I want to see it all.” 

“So you’re a bit of a vagabond then?” You asked. 

“I guess that’s one word for it.” He took a sip of his coffee. 

“I kind of admire that.” You said. “Being able to explore the whole world, never truly tied down to one place. Though I bet you have friends in Seoul who miss you when you’re gone?” He sighed and you noticed his expression change. Not in a painful way, just maybe a little distant. Like he was thinking of something from a long time ago now. 

He looked into his coffee cup. “I do, but home is a complicated thing.” You nodded. Part of you felt you shouldn’t press it, but curiosity got the best of you. Besides, what was the chance you would keep seeing him after tonight? 

“Why’s that?” He cringed a bit but took a deep breath to calm himself. 

“My fiance passed, about a year ago now.” Your mouth dropped open. 

“Oh my god I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have asked.” You apologized profusely. Guilt instantly bubbled in your chest. 

V seemed lost in his thoughts for a moment and then looked up at you seeing the look on your face. “Thank you, it’s still difficult for me to discuss.” 

“Well of course it is. I’m really sorry, that must have been horrible.” He nodded. 

“Hence why home doesn't really feel like home anymore.” Your face paled a bit, but V smiled. “Really it’s okay, I don’t mind that you asked.” He opened up the menu. “Now, what do you recommend here?” You stuttered opening your own menu. 

“Everything is good but I love their breakfast food in particular.” You explained. He looked through the menu. You still felt a bit embarrassed, you shouldn’t have tried to press into his personal life like that. Especially a person you’ve only known for less than an hour now. 

“I don’t know if I asked already but-” V looked up at you. “But why did you decide to go for a walk so late at night?” You laughed gently, trying to think of the answer yourself. 

“I couldn’t sleep, I guess I thought maybe going for a walk might help.” V listened and nodded when you were finished. 

He finished the coffee in his cup. “I know how that feels, sometimes what you need is some fresh air. Have you had a lot on your mind recently?” You shrugged. 

“I guess you could say that, but I think I always have a lot on my mind.” 

“A lot of burdens to bear?” V questioned. 

“Yeah, I guess they’d be burdens.” 

“I understand exactly how that feels.” V said. “Do you have people who can help share that burden?” 

You looked at him, his eyes showed genuine concern and curiosity. Not anything shallow. “I do, but I don’t like feeling like I’m burdening them though but I also know there’s no shame in needing to ask for help.” You explained. “You understand?” 

V looked thoughtful for a moment, like he was considering what you were saying. “I do, in theory.” 

“Not so much in practice?” You asked. 

“No. Not so much in practice.” V said. The server came back around and took down your orders. Then leaving the two of you alone again. 

There was a brief silence between you two. Then you chose to change the subject. “What kind of photos do you take?” V seemed to perk up at the mention of his work. 

“Landscapes mostly, but I also like to experiment with different things. Try and stretch myself.” You listened to him carefully. When he talked about his work he got this look in his eyes. Something peaceful, almost wistful. 

“Did you always want to be a photographer?” 

“No actually.” V laughed, pushing some more of his wet hair out of his face. “Growing up I wanted to be a businessman like my father, but then I realized that wasn’t the path for me and decided to pursue photography instead.” 

“I’m guessing Dad wasn’t too happy about that?” Jihyun laughed again, although this one with a different tone. 

“Not at all, my father isn’t one to think very highly of artists.” 

“Well that’s a shame.” You said. “I’m sure you’re a great photographer.” 

V’s face flushed red. “Thank you, that’s a very kind thing for you to say.” 

The two of you chatted more, only pausing briefly when your food arrived at your table. V asked about your own life, what you did for work, about your background. His questions were all respectful, but he had the energy of someone who felt you could tell anything too. Talking to V felt comfortable, like there was no pressure or judgement. Only a good ear that wanted to listen to you. 

Near the end of your meal you were both laughing. V wasn’t one to talk to much about himself but you’d managed a few things out of him. He talked about his best friend back in Seoul. A man who based on his description seemed to be V’s exact opposite. Yet they got along just as well as they did as children. He mentioned his role as the leader of a charity organization he started with his late fiance. 

You noticed the way he looked whenever he mentioned her, his late fiance. He tended to rub his eyes when he mentioned her, then he would get this look in his eyes. One that you read as painful, but also longing, and maybe a small sense of fear. You let him say as much as he wanted to say, not pushing him on the subject of  her. 

Even after you finished your food you waited for a while, hoping that maybe the rain would let up a little. After a while though it became clear that wasn’t going to be the case. The rain even seemed to be worse than before. 

“Let me call you a cab to take you home, I would feel terrible if you had to walk in the rain again.” You perked up and shook your head. 

“No I couldn’t have you do that, I really don’t live very far I’ll just walk home.” 

“Then if it’s alright may I walk you home? Just so I know you get there safe?” Looking him over and thinking for a minute you nodded. Even if you’d only known him a short time, V seemed trustworthy. 

“Okay.” He smiled, you paid for your meal and made your way to the entrance. Looking out into the pouring rain again you both gathered your courage. 

“Ready to go out there?” V asked you. 

“No but we have to.” You took a deep breath and stepped out, getting your slightly dried clothes soaked all over again. V followed you. “I’m not too far away I promise, just a few blocks.” 

You both went through a mixture of running and walking, the heavy rain making it hard to see and talk. You held onto V’s arm as to to lose him, or slip on the slick sidewalk. Your heart raced in your chest and you spared a few looks at V. 

Only a couple hours ago you were just deciding to go out, and now you're running alongside someone you never would have thought you’d meet. This almost felt like a scene from a book or a movie, meeting a kind stranger while on a park bench in a rainstorm. Again, you weren’t complaining though. 

You stopped in front of the door to your building leaning against the small amount of cover you could get. You both panted from the running, dripping with rain again. You realized just how much you would need a hot shower after this. 

“Well.” You said. “This is mine. You can get back to your hotel alright?” V nodded. 

“Yes, I think I’ll probably call for someone to pick me up but I’ll be fine.” He said looking back out into the rain. “It was really nice to meet you.” 

You smiled at him. “It was lovely to meet you too V. Thank you for going to late night food with me.” 

“It was my pleasure.” He said. He looked out at the rain and then back at you. The same look on his face as when he first asked you to eat with him. “I’m going to be here, in town for the next two weeks. Normally I would wander around myself but I would love to get a local to show me around the best places.” He said looking at you. 

You took a deep breath. “Are you asking to see me again V?” 

“I suppose I am. I hope I wasn’t too forward?” You shook your head. 

“Not at all, I’d love to see you again too.” You smiled at him and reached your hand out. “I’ll give you my number so you can call me.” He pulled his phone from his pocket and took down your number alongside your name. 

“I’ll call you tomorrow then. Thank you for this, meeting you has truly been an unexpected gift.” V told you. 

“Likewise.” You looked into his eyes, your heart racing fast. You both stared at each other for a moment, standing close to him you could vaguely smell some washed away cologne. 

After a moment you came to your senses and stepped away, your heart beating far too fast. “I should head in, change out of these clothes. Safe a good and safe night V. I hope you sleep well.” His eyes lingered on you, but he smiled. 

“You too, I hope you can actually sleep now.” 

“Me too.” You laughed opening your door. “Goodnight V.”

“Goodnight.” He said, you slipped inside walking slowly. Your heart thrumming in your chest. A small smile on your face. 

When you returned to your apartment you were careful not to drip too much on your floor. Still you wandered to the window and looked out the front. Watching V as he got into a taxi, taking a brief look up at the building. Like he was trying to find you in one of the windows. Though not quite catching your gaze. 

As the taxi drove away you looked to your phone praying for a call in the morning. A sense of excitement at the thought of seeing V again. 

You showered and lied down in bed, able to fall asleep now quickly, your mind full of more positive thoughts. More wondrous thoughts, that it didn’t take long for you to drift off. 

While you slept your phone lit up, a couple text messages lighting up the screen. 

It was lovely to meet you tonight, I really hope I can see you again. 

This is V btw :)