#Watanuki as a reflection of a person

[completeoveranalysis]

[1]

xxxHolic Chapter 83

OH this Watanuki cover! Star eyes.

The overlapping ripples on the surface of the water? Like changes in the timeline? Like the water in the Reservoir, which Watanuki helped provide? 

And Watanuki being both above and below the ripples at the same time! Sometimes they fall into the background behind him. Sometimes they flow clearly over him. Sometimes they blend into his clothing as if they’re the shadows of other ripples we can’t see, sometimes they meld with him, becoming part of his hair. Sometimes they overwrite him completely, making his hands partially disappear. It’s a wonderful echo of Watanuki existing inbetween the changes to the universe. The changes to the timeline have resulted in his existence, but he wasn't meant to be more than a ripple that would eventually flatten out and disappear. And at the moment time itself is not currently stable, and so neither is Watanuki.  

Oh and the goldfish that are only visible as shadows? Kind of like the spirits Watanuki can see - but also like fragments of people that don’t really exist? 

Or is it that Watanuki is like the goldfish too? We can’t see the original goldfish here, but we see the shadow that’s being cast - and the shadow is real. Like Watanuki is a shadow of Lava Lamp, and the other clone people are echoes of the people they were intended to copy. And they’re not those people, but they’re living shadows that are still real and exist, just like Watanuki. 

You could also get some mileage out the fact that he’s upside down, since he's a living mirror image - an actual reflection of someone else that could be standing above this pool of water that we just can't see.

And it's especially interesting with Watanuki under water, since Lava Lamp made the wish that created Watanuki IN the Reservoir. The drama in the Reservoir is the point at which Watanuki began, which makes it all the more meaningful that the reason the water exists in the first place is because he helped put it there. Making Watanuki both a ripple in the water AND the cause of the ripple at the same time.

[humanoidtyphoons]

on reflection i don’t actually like trc!syaoran/sakura (or: tsubasa/tsubasa), bc like. m!tsubasa/syaoran is the son of CCS!syaoran/sakura, and looks like the spitting image of ccs!syaoran

he travels dimensions and meets.... f!tsubasa/sakura, who is the spitting image of ccs!sakura but 14

so like. he essentially ends up with a person who looks like his mom? and that’s kind of... idk.

i wish clamp hadn’t done that???? i wish m!tsubasa looked different???? maybe he should have looked more like watanuki or something?????

like i get clamp wanting their otps to be.... universal and the same in each universe but i’m still kind of like... oh that’s a bit of a shame that it has to be ~destined~ that way? we can’t have crack otps through the many dimensions they travel?

[annebrontesrequiem]

I posted 5,627 times in 2021

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4495 posts reblogged (80%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 4.0 posts.

I added 4,137 tags in 2021

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#bern speaks - 511 posts

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#higurashi - 169 posts

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#tsubasa reservoir chronicle - 123 posts

#inuyasha - 78 posts

#ikemen vampire - 66 posts

#liveblog - 58 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#this also causes me pain tho cause i’ll never be a professional ballet dancer but we don’t have time to unpack that on a mystic messenger po

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Rip OSHA Official, forever in our hearts

82 notes • Posted 2021-09-01 23:31:34 GMT

#4

Another thing I love about Yuuko is that she’s in some ways very detached and distant, a mentor and a sort of idealized figure, while also being almost painfully human. 

The conversation where she talks to Watanuki about butterflies and wishes is so difficult specifically because it feels so intimate, almost uncomfortably so. Yuuko has been this mentor figure for so long, with all the answers and all the advice. So seeing it in the reverse - seeing Watanuki ask Yuuko what she wants and realize that Yuuko doesn’t really know what she personally wants, besides the inevitability of what she’s been building up to - is just so intimate. It’s where you realize that the beauty of Yuuko’s character is that it’s ultimately both incredibly strong and incredibly fragile. Fragile in the fact that Yuuko has been working towards this goal of saving the world alone and isolated and so self-consuming that she has forgotten her own wants. Strong in the fact that she still manages to continue on, still manages to fight towards her goals and retain her personality in the process.

The fact that Watanuki is able to see this vulnerability not only shows incredible character growth on his part - how he has finally come to reach out to other people both for his own problems and for theirs - but it shows the depths of Yuuko’s character. Yuuko is supposed to be idealized, she’s called The Space Time Witch, rather than her actual name. She is notorious for her power, and yet she is ultimately just another person with a wish, another person who needs others and needs happiness. And that’s just so beautiful about her. And that’s one of the reasons I love her so much.

83 notes • Posted 2021-09-08 04:02:54 GMT

#3

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FAVS

90 notes • Posted 2021-04-01 05:20:32 GMT

#2

Kurogane’s introduction is one of my favorite character introductions of all time. The fact his first appearance is him literally murdering people is such a good indicator of who he is, what his flaws are, and how he sees the world overall. The fast pace reflects his own frenetic energy, and the way he’s unceremoniously dumped off sets up his put upon characterization in the lighter moments.

It’s just so bold to start off with your protagonist committing petty murder - something not endearing to the sensibilities of the readers - and I love it so much.

100 notes • Posted 2021-10-20 05:18:12 GMT

#1

Me, a Shugo Chara fan: Oh no…

103 notes • Posted 2021-11-05 19:35:51 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[existentialismee]

“P-please... s-someone, help me..!”

It was a voice he knew all too well, yet was one he had not heard in decades. A quiet, broken voice, begging for someone to find it in the mist. Watanuki knew how dangerous it was for him to be there, yet he couldn’t stop himself from trying to find it anyways; walking deeper and deeper into the forest.

“A-anyone.. please..! M-mom, dad..!”

His heart breaks at those words, feeling a familiar pang of loneliness cascade through him as his fingers dug into the flesh of his palms. His steps quickened with every beat in his chest, with every memory that flashed across his mind-- if this was a dream, it was a cruel one to force him to see.. yet somehow, Watanuki knew that wasn’t quite right.

Even if the person that voice belonged to wasn’t really there, even if Watanuki couldn’t reach out to him, everything presented before him here was real. And that scared him, down to his core.

As he finally came to a stop, his chest heaving with laboured breath, gold and sapphire eyes searched desperately through the fog.. until finally, that small form came into view. Crouched down next to a tree, a boy who could be no older than seven sat on the grass on his knees; tears streaming down his face as quiet sobs escaped his lips. His hands which were pulled tight to his chest were shaking, afraid of every sound around him, every shadow that fell from the trees.

Watanuki froze. No words could leave him, even if he tried to speak. No steps could be taken, even if he wanted to move.

The voice he had heard.. he had been right all along. It was not an unknown child lost within the heart of the Mistwood-- it was himself from many, many years past.

“.. it is you.. Kimihiro.” when he finally willed himself to speak again, he didn’t bother trying to hide the sadness that emanated through his voice; through the pain that reflected in his gaze. Kimihiro’s tiny shoulders jumped at the sound of his name, and though he shrunk back even further against the tree, his widened blue eyes looked up at the stranger; tired, and scared.

“Wh.. who are you..?”

[pocket-luv101]

Whispered Promises || Part 1

Fandom: Servamp Ship: KuroMahi Characters: Kuro, Mahiru

Summary: After Mahiru witnesses a major crime, he is targeted by the mafia. Kuro becomes his bodyguard to keep him safe. (KuroMahi, Bodyguard AU)

(Part 1) || Part 2 || Part 3

“I’ll be at the station in ten minutes and then we can walk to the pub. Don’t you dare buy hotdogs for dinner though. That’s barely a meal and you won’t have energy for tomorrow.” Mahiru laughed with his friend over the phone. Kuro’s shift ended late but he called him to ask if he wanted to have a late dinner with him. “You still have unhealthy tastes from when we were kids.”

Since Kuro was a detective, he was busy most days. It was difficult to make time for each other but their friendship was worth the effort. Mahiru decided to go to the station and walk Kuro to the restaurant rather than meeting him there. He thought it would be a good opportunity to spend more time together. Even though they could talk over the phone, he preferred to speak with him in person. He pictured the subtle smile Kuro would make and grinned to himself.

A gleam of light caught his attention and it made him to pause. He assumed that the light was caused by moonlight reflecting off glass. Mahiru looked in the direction of the light and noticed a car sitting idle in an alleyway. His eyes narrowed when he saw that the car didn’t have a license plate. Kuro’s voice pulled him out of his thoughts. “Mahiru, did something happen? You suddenly went quiet.”

“Kuro, what reason would a person have to remove the license plate from their car? I’m not a cop but I assume it’s not good.” Mahiru told him in quiet whisper. He hesitantly crossed the street to the alley. The light he saw earlier meant that there could be someone in the car. “The car is parked next to the beer store on the corner of Fleet Street. I’ll stop people from entering the alley if it’s something dangerous.”

“You shouldn’t go near that car either, Mahiru! Just wait in the beer store for me to get there. The police station isn’t far from where you are so I’ll be in ten minutes. Just stay somewhere safe.” Kuro pleaded but he knew Mahiru wasn’t the type to ignore people in danger.

“It might be nothing and I’m just being paranoid. I’ll keep my phone on so you’ll hear if anything happens.” He told him and crept into the alley way. He kept a tight grip on his phone to calm his nerves. Mahiru was a normal civilian and he had never been in a dangerous situation before. He didn’t know what he might see but there was a possibility that someone innocent was hiding or in danger. The least he could do was give the police as much information he could when they arrive.

He peered into the car but he couldn’t see anything inside. Mahiru started to walk around the car until he heard voices nearby. He instinctively covered his mouth to not make a noise and he crouched beside the car. The alley was dark yet he could make out two people a few feet in front of him. His heart stopped when he saw that one of them had a gun.

“You missed this month’s payment. I thought we had an agreement. We protect your store and you push some drugs for us. You haven’t been selling your share and we’re starting to think you’re skimming us. You should know better than to cross us.” The man said. The other person stumbled over an answer but it was clear that any explanation was pointless.

A gunshot echoed throughout the alley and Mahiru couldn’t stop himself letting out a sharp gasp. He turned around to run but, in his panic, he tripped. He grabbed the car door to stop his fall. The car alarm blared to life and his heart stopped. The car’s headlights flashed and the light allowed Mahiru to see the shooter. Their eyes met and fear made his legs stiff even as his mind was screaming for him to run.

The moment the man point his gun at him, Mahiru was pulled backwards. His surroundings became a blur and he wasn’t able to make any sense of what happened next. Mahiru felt himself being dragged away with the sound of gunshots following them. He wasn’t hurt when someone took him behind a dumpster and blanketed him in warmth.

“Hyde, the shooter is escaping on foot. He’s heading south down Fleet Street.” Kuro shouted the orders to his brother. His voice brought Mahiru out of his daze and he looked up at him. He wanted to thank him for saving him but his voice wouldn’t come out. His body shook but he regained enough control of his hands to grip Kuro’s shirt. “Lily, take care of Mahiru and I’ll go after the shooter.”

When he would’ve left, Mahiru stopped him. He let go of his shirt so he could throw himself into his strong chest. Mahiru wrapped his arms around him and clung onto him. Kuro couldn’t leave after he saw how pale he was. He tenderly stroked his brown hair to comfort him. “You’re safe, Mahiru. It’s okay.”

“Please, don’t leave me.” He whispered.

“I won’t. JeJe, can you take charge while I get Mahiru somewhere safe?” He asked his brother who nodded. Kuro wrapped his arm around Mahiru’s waist as they stood. He pressed himself close to his side as they walked out of the alley. Mahiru sat on the curb and he glanced around them worriedly. His eyes fell back to his clenched hands on his lap.

The danger had already passed but Mahiru was still struggling to absorb what happened. His hands trembled until Kuro wrapped them in a reassuring warmth. The simple gesture made him feel safe. He found his voice again and asked: “Will that man be okay? Oh God, I couldn’t do anything and I just stood there. If you hadn’t come… Why can’t I stop shaking?”

“It’s the adrenaline. Take deep breaths and count with me, Mahiru. That will help you calm down and return your heartbeat to normal.” Kuro took off his jacket and wrapped it around his shoulders. While it was a warm summer night, Mahiru found himself pulling the jacket tighter around his body. The lingering warmth from Kuro’s body clung to the fabric and he took comfort in that. After a few breaths, colour returned to his cheeks and Kuro was relieved to see him relax.

Kuro wasn’t the best with words so he wasn’t comfortable speaking with the victims and witnesses. He would usually have Lily speak with them. Mahiru was different though. They had been friends since they were children and he would do anything to help him. He wished he had arrived sooner or convinced him not to enter the alley. He pushed his own guilt aside to focus on Mahiru.

Slowly, he brushed his bangs from his brown eyes. “Are you feeling better now?”

“Now that you’re here.” Mahiru managed to give him a small smile. “Thank you, Kuro.”

“If you’re ready, we need to go to the station and take your statement.” JeJe’s voice came between them. Even as Mahiru nodded, he didn’t want to let go of Kuro’s hands. He must’ve read his thoughts for he adjusted their fingers to thread together.

“We’ll go together. I won’t let go of your hand until you feel safe.” Kuro vowed. “I’ll protect you, Mahiru.”

After they returned to the police station, Mahiru made a statement and worked with a police sketch artist. They weren’t able to leave until well past midnight. Mahiru asked Kuro to stay the night since he wasn’t comfortable being alone. The shooter had escaped and officers were currently searching for him with the sketch the artist made.

The sun had barely risen when Kuro woke. He walked into the kitchen but he didn’t find Mahiru cooking like he usually would. It was rare that he woke up before him but the previous night had been stressful. He thought of all the times Mahiru would cook for him after a difficult investigation. Kuro wanted do the same for him and make him smile again. He decided to cook breakfast for Mahiru and rummaged through his fridge for food. Kuro would often sleep over at his house so he was able to easily find everything.

His phone rang and Kuro answered it as he heated water. His brother’s name flashed on the screen and he knew the reason he called him so early was likely related to the case. “Hey, JeJe. Has there been an update on the shooter? It’s only been a few hours so I didn’t expect for someone to identify him so soon.”

“I sent the sketch to Mikuni and he recognized the man.” JeJe told him. A rock dropped in Kuro’s stomach. Mikuni was working undercover with that mafia group, Karasu. His brother would only contact Mikuni if he thought the two cases were related. “The shooter is one of Karasu’s favourite messengers, Watanuki. Captain has already ordered us to bring the guy in. I thought I should tell you so you can prepare Mahiru. His testimony is the best chance we have to take them down.”

“Shit.” Kuro cursed and ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. For the past month, they had been slowly building a case against the mafia group but their Captain was impatient to arrest them. Karasu would murder witnesses so gathering evidence for a trial was difficult. “Mahiru said the shooter saw him so the mafia will go after him. Can we protect him? Did the prosecutor say anything about the trial date?”

“Misono won’t have a date until we arrest Watanuki. Even if we arrest him today, the trial will likely be weeks from now. You know how backed up the system is.” JeJe said and caused Kuro to sigh heavily. He wished that things were as easy as the movies. “I can ask the Captain for Mahiru to be put in witness protection but that’s not in the budget. The best we can do is have a cop drive by his house hourly.”

“Karasu has killed five witnesses already and I don’t want Mahiru to be their next target.” Kuro’s grip tightened around his phone. He knew that his brother wasn’t able to do much either. The frightened expression Mahiru had the previous night made Kuro want to protect him. “There must be something we can do.”

“If you’re worried about Mahiru, you should be the one to protect him like a bodyguard. Hyde suggested the idea. You have a lot of paid vacation days saved up and we’ll take care of your cases. Mahiru’s our friend and we don’t want him to be hurt.” JeJe said. “Kuro, we know Mahiru is important to you so it’s okay. We just need to talk to Captain about it. Hyde is already doing that.”

“Thanks. I’ll talk to Mahiru about the situation and ask him what he wants to do.” Kuro said and ended the call. He heard the door open behind him and he turned around to see Mahiru step out of the room. He didn’t know if he had overheard their conversation but said: “That was JeJe. We can talk about his call after we eat. I wanted to make you breakfast but I got distracted. It should be ready soon though. There’s orange juice.”

“Thank you, Kuro.” He said and took the cup from him. Mahiru leaned against the counter and watched Kuro pour noodles into a pot. Usually, he would lecture Kuro for heating up processed food but he knew the breakfast was a thoughtful gesture. He tasted a spoonful of the broth and said, “It’s good. I must be a lucky man to have your special instant noodles.”

“Did you sleep well?” Kuro didn’t know how he would tell Mahiru about the mafia group. He was a normal civilian and the situation could frighten him. He never wanted to see Mahiru scared again.

“I overheard your call with JeJe about the mafia group targeting witnesses.” His words made Kuro’s eyes widen. He looked into his brown eyes but they weren’t fearful like they were last night. Mahiru set down his cup and said: “Honestly, I was terrified when I heard you say that. I read about Karasu in the papers. But, if I can help you stop them by testifying, I won’t run away.”

“You must be more courageous and reckless than most of the police force. The only one crazier than you would be Licht but that’s a high bar.” Kuro joked and stroked his brown hair. At first, he only meant to smooth his hair back into place but he found his hands lingering. He didn’t want to let go of him. “I’ll protect you, Mahiru. JeJe and I are working on ways to keep you safe.”

“I wouldn’t have anyone be my bodyguard but my best friend.” Mahiru didn’t know if he should confess that Kuro was the only reason that he was so calm despite the situation. He trusted him with his life. “I don’t know a lot about police work or things like that outside of movies. Will it be a risk to go to work? I don’t want to endanger my co-workers by simply being there.”

“It might be best to move you to a safe house. The Karasu has a lot of connections and they might be able to find your address and work. We can stay in a hotel so they won’t find you. I’ll have JeJe call your boss to explain the situation too.” Kuro knew how much Mahiru loved his job as a veterinarian. “We’ll catch that man as quickly as we can, Mahiru. I won’t let anything happen to you in that time.”

“I know you will protect me, Kuro.” Mahiru smiled up at him and trust shone in his brown eyes. He stepped away from him and said, “I’ll start packing some things for the move but I need a shower first. Do you want to join me to make sure there’s no one hiding behind my towels, Mr. Bodyguard?”

“Anything to make you feel safe.” He joked and they both laughed. Mahiru walked down the hall while Kuro continued cooking.

[somegirlsnerdywords2]

Anime i’ve Watched

That begin with a S (Part 4)!

Yep this is how i’m going to bring over all the anime and manga i’ve watched and posted about on the old blog. It’s not so detailed but it will have to do. Anything new I watch or read from this point on will have their own posts.

SoniAni: Super Sonico The Animation:

Genres: Music, Slice of Life

Synopsis:  Super Sonico is a clutzy, adorable, and well-endowed 18-year old girl. She's a complete sucker for anything cute, especially stray cats, all of which she giddily adopts. However, though Sonico should be enjoying a carefree and simple lifestyle as a young college student, her life is really anything but easy: she must balance being a professional model, working part-time at her grandmother's restaurant, and practicing guitar and performing concerts with her friends Suzu Fujimi and Fuuri Watanuki in their band, First Astronomical Velocity—all while attending college. SoniAni: Super Sonico the Animation follows Sonico as she faces daunting challenges in her search for her place in the world, even when her days are brimming with love and happiness. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7/10

Finished airing in 2014 with 12 episodes. 

My Thoughts: For a while there I was collecting Sonico figures, still have most of them... though a few did break while moving unfortunately. About the anime though? Wasn’t all that amazing. What did you expect though really?

Soul Eater:

Genres: Action, Fantasy, Comedy, Supernatural, Shounen

Synopsis: Death City is home to the famous Death Weapon Meister Academy, a technical academy headed by the Shinigami—Lord Death himself. Its mission: to raise "Death Scythes" for the Shinigami to wield against the many evils of their fantastical world. These Death Scythes, however, are not made from physical weapons; rather, they are born from human hybrids who have the ability to transform their bodies into Demon Weapons, and only after they have consumed the souls of 99 evil beings and one witch's soul. Soul Eater Evans, a Demon Scythe who only seems to care about what's cool, aims to become a Death Scythe with the help of his straight-laced wielder, or meister, Maka Albarn. The contrasting duo work and study alongside the hot headed Black☆Star and his caring weapon Tsubaki, as well as the Shinigami's own son, Death the Kid, an obsessive-compulsive dual wielder of twin pistols Patty and Liz. Soul Eater follows these students of Shibusen as they take on missions to collect souls and protect the city from the world's threats while working together under the snickering sun to become sounder in mind, body, and soul. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7.5/10

Finished airing in 2009 with a total of 51 episodes. 

My Thoughts: The series that reignited my love of anime once I became an adult! Which reflecting on that now seems a bit odd but whatever! It’s been so long since i’ve last watched it that I can’t say for certain how good the actual series is but i’m positive it will forever hold a special place in my heart! Which is extremely unhelpful to anyone looking for some info to aid in their decision to check this title out. Sorry! 

Summer Wars:

Genres: Sci-fi, Comedy, Film

Synopsis:  OZ, a virtual world connected to the internet, has become extremely popular worldwide as a spot for people to engage in a large variety of activities, such as playing sports or shopping, through avatars created and customized by the user. OZ also possesses a near impenetrable security due to its strong encryption, ensuring that any personal data transmitted through the networks will be kept safe in order to protect those who use it. Because of its convenient applications, the majority of society has become highly dependent on the simulated reality, even going as far as entrusting the system with bringing back the unmanned asteroid explorer, Arawashi. Kenji Koiso is a 17-year-old math genius and part-time OZ moderator who is invited by his crush Natsuki Shinohara on a summer trip. But unbeknownst to him, this adventure requires him to act as her fiancé. Shortly after arriving at Natsuki's family's estate, which is preparing for her great-grandmother's 90th birthday, he receives a strange, coded message on his cell phone from an unknown sender who challenges him to solve it. Kenji is able to crack the code, but little does he know that his math expertise has just put Earth in great danger. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 10/10

A film released in 2009.

My Thoughts: Interesting style and an enjoyable story. I film worth giving a watch! 

Sword Art Online:

Genres: Action, Game, Adventure, Romance, Fantasy

Synopsis: In the year 2022, virtual reality has progressed by leaps and bounds, and a massive online role-playing game called Sword Art Online (SAO) is launched. With the aid of "NerveGear" technology, players can control their avatars within the game using nothing but their own thoughts. Kazuto Kirigaya, nicknamed "Kirito," is among the lucky few enthusiasts who get their hands on the first shipment of the game. He logs in to find himself, with ten-thousand others, in the scenic and elaborate world of Aincrad, one full of fantastic medieval weapons and gruesome monsters. However, in a cruel turn of events, the players soon realize they cannot log out; the game's creator has trapped them in his new world until they complete all one hundred levels of the game. In order to escape Aincrad, Kirito will now have to interact and cooperate with his fellow players. Some are allies, while others are foes, like Asuna Yuuki, who commands the leading group attempting to escape from the ruthless game. To make matters worse, Sword Art Online is not all fun and games: if they die in Aincrad, they die in real life. Kirito must adapt to his new reality, fight for his survival, and hopefully break free from his virtual hell. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 8.5/10

Finished airing in 2012 with a total of 25 episodes. 

My Thoughts: Loved this season. I thought it was super freaking cool and unique the first time around... I was also pretty new to anime at this point but whatever, I enjoyed it and I won’t apologize for that. 

Sword Art Online II:

Genres: Action, Game, Adventure, Romance, Fantasy

Synopsis:  A year after escaping Sword Art Online, Kazuto Kirigaya has been settling back into the real world. However, his peace is short-lived as a new incident occurs in a game called Gun Gale Online, where a player by the name of Death Gun appears to be killing people in the real world by shooting them in-game. Approached by officials to assist in investigating the murders, Kazuto assumes his persona of Kirito once again and logs into Gun Gale Online, intent on stopping the killer. Once inside, Kirito meets Sinon, a highly skilled sniper afflicted by a traumatic past. She is soon dragged in his chase after Death Gun, and together they enter the Bullet of Bullets, a tournament where their target is sure to appear. Uncertain of Death Gun's real powers, Kirito and Sinon race to stop him before he has the chance to claim another life. Not everything goes smoothly, however, as scars from the past impede their progress. In a high-stakes game where the next victim could easily be one of them, Kirito puts his life on the line in the virtual world once more. [Written by MAL Rewrite]

My Rating: 7.5/10

Finished airing in 2014 with a total of 24 episodes. 

My Thoughts: And then they lost me, while mostly in the 2nd half. Not as enjoyable as the first season.

[leafslash]

👄 watanuki, perhaps..

* SEND 👄 + A NAME AND MY MUSE WILL TALK ABOUT THEM !  //  @existentialismee

“ When I first met him, I wouldn’t have thought things would end up like they did. It’s strange, isn’t it? When you meet someone for the first time, you never really know what that has in store for you. I don’t know if it’s what you’d call fate – I’ve never believed in it before, but it’s encounters like this that have to make me wonder a little. ”  Ashton smiles reflectively, as if fondly recounting the past few months. “ But I get the feeling there’s a reason I met him. I wonder if there’s a word to describe something like that. ”

“ Whatever that reason is, I’m glad. Watanuki is a good person… you can see it most when he looks at other people. ”  His hands find one another in his lap, the digits tracing over themselves absently while he continues. Ashton wears an expression of warmth, one that speaks aplenty of his appreciation. “ He’s a good friend who’s shown me and these two a lot of kindness, and we’re grateful to him. Gyoro and Ururun say they really mean it. I’d like him to know that, if I could. ”

“ You know, I’ve been checking on him a lot lately, now that I think about it. Hopefully he doesn’t mind it or anything. Maybe I’m worried, but… it might also be a way to say, ‘thank you.’  … If it reaches him, I think I’ll be happy knowing just that. ”

[themangaguide]

Which in means is unfortunate

A Supernatural Story:

hen is an excellent superordinary tale of Watanuki Kimihiro, a young teenager with his special ability to see spirits as well as his family makes them need. Oneday, when functioning from the common tones, he enters a mystical looking structure, merely to uncover that the spirits have disappeared, which the structure is occupied with a "witch"- Yuuko Ichihara- who are able to give requirements. Watanuki requires to be left from the challenging spirits, but on Yuuko's store- work that's like no different, must work in return. Quickly Watanuki sees herself understanding much more concerning additional dimensions, the abnormal world, as well as stumbles upon two personalities from the varied galaxy: Syaoran and Sakura ...

In an essential brief: hen isn't your common work-of-the-generator manga. Gorgeous in refined narration as well as it is detailed artwork, this really is manga at the most effective of HOLD. You start with a number of "celebrations" that Yuuko reveals something and also narrates touching regarding mankind as well as human personality after which slowly diving into the tricks as well as require for being of Watanuki, it features advancement as well as exemplary personality level. The areas relocate quickly, without you in fact observing it heading to a various in one event. It's slow-moving in the beginning, however in a fantastic way, because display screen and it offers room for that characters to in fact develop their shades. Ultimately, itis crossovers with Tsubasa Reservoir Stories, it's cousin manga, lead in to the manga to a primary target around 100 sections. Yuukois amazing appeal, supreme as well as attractive personality with vibrant "apprentice" Watanuki is just a pleasurable connection. Also offering is just a little tiny cast, together with a little primary actors, that enables the manga to focus exclusively on these personalities with treatment and also respect, instead of selecting apathetic initiatives to secure a sizable cast. An advantage regarding hen is the reality that it's offered for individuals that like believed provoking manga that manages to appear as well as visceral. It's that quality that allows it to maintain a sensation of comprehensibility as well as readiness which draws in the target market in, while being simple in piece to obtain a great part of the history.

Heading onto information, however, possibly the most superb component about that sequence, is based on characters and also its security. Approximately 1/3 of the manga commits itself to tales, each shutting having mentioning or a specific concept, which could or not whilst the target market might prefer to observe maybe as positive. It's below where we acquire a chockfull of humor- from need to have food and Watanukiis high feelings to Yuukois excellent plan. It's below that amazingly, we acquire the most amount of individuality advancement. Watanuki slowly changes from the regular, abnormal teenager to some curious, enhanced and also extra serious person. Yuuko himself changes- nonetheless more silently, to make sure that as Watanuki begins to comprehend herself greater, for that reason do the people around him, as well as for that reason melt away mizorechan manga is absolutely even more of the personality-based, reflective tale than its sibling, TRC, that will certainly be a great deal much more piece-based.

Another 2/3 of the manga enter into crossovers utilizing the additional series, which in means is unfortunate, considering that to be able to totally recognize whatis going on, you are most likely to definitely need to study TRC or have an excellent understanding of whatis taking place. That's among the most effective flaws one which has actually established numerous eliminated from studying it, concerning that manga, but I want to state it today- don't permit it reach you. Need to you would rather research TRC - that includes a substantial prolonged and challenging item - then that is entirely good, however the most basic means to understand these occasions would certainly be to just examine some typical details concerning TRC (information that can be gotten by seeing WIkipedia, ought to you want). It is likewise for this period that the amazing modification in tone happens- an exceptionally daring relocation, and also in fact, why is this manga fantastic within the place. a wit is started off like by hen, however quits having a much deeper environment. It is below when we realize that in the majority of problems, not only requires, just like is a gain for anything where the individuality advancement of Watanuki absolutely cares for, there's likewise a price. Delight is in accordance with everyone, and also what could be one individualis joy might be one more's catastrophe. hen takes a look at very well and also these designs, offering extremely the sensible (yet nonetheless having an optimistic benefit to it) options.

Not just that, but ultimately, hen is wonderful at providing the personalities and also atmosphere living. No character seems entirely smooth as well as each figure varies within their own method while some added renovation might have been consisted of, & most especially, the associations between your figures are extraordinary. Each connection as Yuuko claimed himself, and also forms the smoothness in an absolutely distinct technique - it are these connections that unquestionably, make us human, and also us desire to desire. It's a great manga for anybody that like anime manga. I very advise it! For more related information, please visit https://findjapanesemanga.my-free.website/

[yourhealthmattersblog]

The most great element

A Supernatural Story:

real no heroine wa irimasen manga is a great mythological tale of Watanuki Kimihiro, a young teenager with his unique ability to see spirits and also his family makes them wish. Oneday, when working from the regular tones, he goes into a mystical looking building, merely to uncover that the spirits have disappeared, which the structure is occupied with a "witch"- Yuuko Ichihara- who have the ability to provide requirements. Watanuki needs to be left from the tough spirits, but on Yuuko's store- work that's like no different, should operate in return. Promptly Watanuki sees herself recognizing much more concerning additional measurements, the unnatural globe, as well as stumbles upon two personalities from the varied galaxy: Syaoran and Sakura ...

In an essential quick: real no heroine wa irimasen manga isn't your common work-of-the-generator manga. Gorgeous in refined storytelling and it is detailed art work, this truly is manga at the best of HOLD. You start with a variety of "celebrations" that Yuuko shows something and also tells touching concerning the human race and also human character after which gradually diving into the keys as well as require for being of Watanuki, it includes growth and excellent personality level. The sections relocate conveniently, without you really discovering it heading to a different in one occasion. It's slow initially, however in a fantastic way, due to the fact that screen and it offers space for that characters to really develop their shades. Eventually, itis crossovers with Tsubasa Reservoir Stories, it's relative manga, lead in to the manga to a main target around 100 sections. Yuukois interesting beauty, omnipotent and hot personality with younger "pupil" Watanuki is just a pleasant connection. Likewise offering is just a little tiny actors, along with a little key cast, that allows the manga to concentrate entirely on these personalities with therapy as well as respect, as opposed to choosing half-hearted efforts to shield a large actors. A good idea regarding real no heroine wa irimasen manga is the fact that it's offered for individuals that such as believed prompting manga that handles to appear and natural. It's that high quality that enables it to maintain a sensation of coherence and readiness which attracts the audience in, while being very easy in item to obtain a great part of the history.

Heading onto information, nonetheless, probably one of the most great element concerning that sequence, is based upon personalities and also its security. About 1/3 of the manga dedicates itself to stories, each shutting having stating or a particular idea, which could or otherwise whilst the target market might prefer to observe probably as pleasurable. It's below where we obtain a chockfull of wit- from wish to have food and also Watanukiis high sensations to Yuukois great system. It's listed below that amazingly, we acquire the most quantity of character development. Watanuki gradually changes from the routine, abnormal teenager to some interested, enhanced and much more serious individual. Yuuko himself modifications- however much more silently, to make sure that as Watanuki begins to understand herself better, consequently do the people around him, as well as for that reason mai ball manga is really more of the personality-based, reflective story than its brother or sister, TRC, that will be a lot a lot more piece-based.

One more 2/3 of the manga enter crossovers using the additional sequence, which in methods is sad, given that to be able to completely recognize whatis taking place, you are most likely to certainly require to study TRC or possess a great expertise of whatis taking place. That's amongst the best flaws one which has actually set a number of gotten rid of from studying it, about that manga, but I want to claim it today- don't allow it reach you. Need to you prefer to examine TRC - that includes a significant lengthy and also difficult item - then that is totally good, nonetheless the easiest way to comprehend these events would be to just take a look at some common information concerning TRC (details that can be obtained by going to WIkipedia, should you prefer). It is additionally for this period that the impressive adjustment in tone happens- a very daring step, and also in fact, why is this manga fantastic within the area. a wit is begun like by real no heroine wa irimasen manga, yet stops having a much deeper environment. It is below as soon as we recognize that in most concerns, not only needs, much like is a gain for anything where the personality development of Watanuki truly looks after, there's likewise an expense. Joy is in accordance with everybody, and what might be one individualis delight could be an additional's catastrophe. real no heroine wa irimasen manga examines very well and also these designs, offering very the sensible (however nonetheless having a hopeful benefit to it) remedies.

Not simply that, but lastly, real no heroine wa irimasen manga is terrific at supplying the characters and also environment living. No personality seems completely smooth as well as each figure differs within their very own technique while some extra enhancement could have been included, & most especially, the organizations in between your figures are unbelievable. Each link as Yuuko said himself, and develops the level of smoothness in an entirely one-of-a-kind method - it are these connections that unquestionably, make us human, and also us need to want. It's an excellent manga for any person that like anime manga. I extremely suggest it! For other related details, you could also visit https://jocelynhonore8910.wixsite.com/learnaboutmanga/post/xpxa7fjtldmo87slaycnqx1630973017

[stringofhearts]

Hall of Mirrors

Pairing: Onho (Minho x Jinki)

Word Count: 1060

Inspired by xxx-Holic. Watanuki x Doumeki BROTP/OTP <3<3<3

Rating: Fluffiest fluff ever.

“Minho, where are you?!”

“Jinki, stay where you are. I’ll find you.” Jinki turned around, his panic growing. He could hear the echo of Minho’s voice, but didn’t know where the sound was coming from.

Their evening was not supposed to go this way.

They had been on a date at the carnival when they walked into the Hall of Mirrors, holding hands and smiling. They laughed, pointing at their reflections in the funny mirrors.

“Jinki, look!” Minho yelled as the mirror made his reflection all long and squiggly.

Jinki looked over.

“That’s kinda how you really look.” Jinki teased.

Minho swatted Jinki’s arm and then pulled Jinki into a soft kiss, his hands on his back, pulling him in close. Jinki’s surprise left his lips pliant against Minho’s, his eyes fluttered closed.

“Minho, what are you doing?” Jinki said, opening his eyes as Minho’s face pulled away. A look of panic flashed across Jinki’s face and he turned around to look behind them, sighing when he saw no one was there.

“Kissing you.” Minho said matter-of-factly with a grin. He grabbed Jinki’s hand and lead them further down the corridor.

A man appeared from behind two mirrors, his face covered with a top hat.

Minho and Jinki gasped from the sudden shock of running into another person. They hadn’t seen a single other person since they entered an hour ago.

Jinki clutched Minho’s arm tightly, pulling him back, but Minho’s feet were planted and he only moved back slightly.

The man tipped a purple top hat with black lace detail back, exposing his face. The man's face is made up to look like a skull, thick white costume paint covering his skin, black make-up rimming his eyes, black lines drawn all the way up his cheeks to made up the skull’s teeth.

“What do we have here? Lovers, perhaps?” The man drawled, his make-up cracking to show his real mouth.

“Uhh…” Jinki started slowly, turning red, shuffling his feet.

Minho simply nodded.

The man looked at Jinki slowly and then addressed them both.

“How sweet. I am the proprietor of the Hall of Mirrors. I am pleased to meet you.”

“We’re pleased to meet you.” Jinki and Minho said automatically, polite to a fault.

“The mirrors here are not what they seem.” The man turned a round medallion on the edge of the mirror like a dial and tapped the mirror. Instead of a reflection, it showed a beach, the moon hanging in the sky, lighting the white sand and water below. The man reached just next to Minho, Jinki’s grip tightened, and did the same to the other mirror. There were bright lights and billboards high into the sky, sounds of taxi’s honking and people, it was Times Square. “These are teleportation portals. They can take you wherever you want. But be careful, only your heart can lead the way.”

On a whim, they decided to go through a mirror. Minho went first, taking a step into the mirror when the building shook and Minho fell forward, Jinki and Minho’s hands separated.

Jinki rushed forward after Minho, but when he landed, Minho wasn’t there.

They were stuck now, playing a never-ending game of chase within the mirrors for the last three hours.

No matter what they did, Jinki and Minho were never in the same place at the same time, seeming to just miss each other.

“Minho, where are you?!”

“Jinki, stay where you are. I’ll find you.” Jinki turned around, his panic growing. He could hear the echo of Minho’s voice, but didn’t know where the sound was coming from.

They would find each other in the mirrors, look at each other’s reflections, but they couldn’t reach each other.

“Minho!”

“Jinki, I’m here.”

Jinki reached his hand out, but the mirror is cold and hard.

“How do I reach you?”

Jinki started to cry. The image of the mirror shimmered and Minho disappeared. Jinki started to cry harder.

Where they going to be stuck here forever?

Would he ever find Minho?

On the other side of the mirror, Minho slammed his hand against the mirror as Jinki disappeared. He scowled. He hated seeing Jinki cry.

Jinki was tired and he was frustrated. He wished they had never come to this place, staying in their dorm far from others instead.

Jinki then remembered what the man said. He stopped crying. He looked at the mirror again and he took a deep breath.

Will it work?

“Show me my heart.”

The mirror shimmered and it was a portal. Jinki just knew that this was different than the last time. He pushed himself through the mirror.

Minho saw a flash of light as a mirror in the corner of the room crackled. The light was warm and it felt like sunshine. He didn’t know why or how, but he felt like he could trust it. Minho walked towards the light.

“Jinki!”

Jinki walked out of a mirror and Minho crushed him into a bear hug immediately. They were back in the Hall of Mirrors. Minho let go and touched Jinki all over, checking his body over for any injuries.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?”

“I'm okay. Are you okay?”

“I'm better now that I found you.” Minho said, the relief evident on his face. “Let's get out of here.” Minho grabbed Jinki’s arm, leading him past the mirrors.

“Yea, let's go.” Jinki took one last lingering look at the mirrors over his shoulder as Minho lead them outside.

Jinki and Minho can be heard talking in the distance as they walked outside and down the stairs.

“How did we get out of there?”

“I asked to see you.”

“I did that too! But it didn’t work.”

Their voices begin to fade as they move farther away from the building.

“I... asked to see my heart.”

“Really?... I’m your heart?”

The man in the top hat leaned against the wall and smiled.

“Good for them.”

Jinki and Minho had figured out the solution and realized what they meant to each other. Other people spent much more time figuring out the same and some never did.

The door chimed as another couple entered the Hall of Mirrors.

“Ah, new customers.”

The man broke out in a slight smile as he walked down the hall, whistling, as he disappeared into the darkness.

[completeoveranalysis]

[2]

Excuse me I just want to gush over how gorgeous all this is. The dramatic shot of Lava Lamp with Evil Wolverine and Yuuko’s faces in the background? The two beings who frame either side of this conflict, both reflecting on the decisions made by Lava Lamp and Watanuki, who are technically the same person? 

And both want the same thing? To move forward in time? 

And how their individual decisions will decide how the entire universe is affected from here?

AND YUUKO’S EVEN MORE DRAMATIC FACE IN THE BACKGROUND OF THE PANEL WITH WATANUKI? SHOWING THE DARKER IMPLICATIONS OF THINGS THAT MIGHT RESULT AS WATANUKI MOVES FORWARD? (And Yuuko’s general fate as a whole)

GORGEOUS. Could not have framed this all better. I’m here for the drama of these two legendary figures talking to themselves in empty rooms for no particular reason, but lining up so perfectly with each other all the same.

WE SURE DO LOVE THE UNPROMPTED DRAMATICS :D 

… OH?!

WAIT. EXCUSE ME?

Ok ok ok one thing at a time

 It’s still completely hilarious that they’re hiding the faces of Lava Lamp and Watanuki’s parents from us. Just. Completely blatantly. Even though, like, we know that they are A Sakura and A Syaoran. We totally COULD see what they look like and have it not spoil anything (Unless it was, say, an eye colour that would give it away) - BUT NO, THE DRAMA. WE ARE HERE FOR THE DRAMA. You cannot see their faces. 

Yuuko has this photo in her store! Meaning she received it as payment? Absolutely love the implications of who would have had this and traded it to her. 

And it’s been long enough since I read some xxxHolic that I have forgotten if I knew that Watanuki traded his memories away. DID I KNOW THIS? DID I SOMEHOW FORGET THIS?

OR AM I NOW OFFICIALLY AHEAD OF WHERE I WAS IN xxxHOLiC?

Please hold while I check this. We had just finished the Kohane arc but had only read up to Doumeki and Kohane talking about Watanuki together.

… OK I CAN’T SEE THIS INFORMATION ANYWHERE. IS THIS NEW????

I AM CONSULTING CHARTS! I AM CHECKING CHAPTER NUMBERS!

I HAVE NO FURTHER INFORMATION REGARDING THE CONCURRENT CHAPTERS. I AM ONLY GUESSING NOW. 

EITHER WAY.

4. WATANUKI’S MEMORIES APPEARING AS A LITTLE BLACK BOX WITH THE FUZZY PATTERN OF A BUTTERFLY ON IT?

PERFECTION. 

And 5. The absolute symmetry of Watanuki and Lava Lamp being one person who became two people, and they're both using wishes to maintain the other? The amount of care and love that goes into reciprocal wishes?? How MUCH of themselves they put on the line to make sure their other half can keep going??

IT'S BEAUTIFUL.

[zacekova]

Unloveable

Currently in the process of reposting all my old fics that no longer show up in searches since tumblr doesn't let anyone find any posts with outside links anymore. 

Fandom: xxxHolic  Pairing: Doumeki Shizuka x Watanuki Kimihiro 

Inspired by the writing prompt: "name three unloveable things you quite like." Watanuki is sometimes not a lovable person

AO3

Volume Watanuki was loud. So loud, in fact, that it was a rare day that Shizuka ended it without having to stick a finger in his ear to drown out the shrieking. Watanuki seemed to be under the impression that no one, Doumeki especially, would actually understand his feelings unless they were given at decibels too numerous to count and accompanied by a dramatic flailing of limbs in a manner that would have been embarrassing for anyone else if caught moving so bizarrely. Shizuka was honestly surprised that no fellow students or neighbors, or even passing strangers on the streets, had never complained about the caterwauling, the pair only ever receiving odd looks and a handful of glares on rare occasions.

Shizuka’s home had always been rather quiet, it being the home to temple keepers. His grandfather had always been calm and soft-spoken, gentle in manner and in the tone of his voice. His father had inherited that trait, his deep baritone rumbling softly through the air and traveling clearly through the meandering halls and paper screens, audible whole rooms away but never obtrusive. The older Doumeki had found a sweet, cheerful woman to be his bride, a kind and caring woman who presented a sharp contrast to his own dry wit and teasing jokes. Shizuka had inherited the quiet awareness of the feelings of others from his mother, but not her ready smiles and giggles, not her expressive face or words. Shizuka took after his father, bland expression, sarcastic humor, low rumble and all. His home had been warm and loving and so very quiet in a welcoming and calming way.

Maybe that was why Shizuka had found Watanuki so fascinating. The energetic boy reacted so dramatically and enthusiastically to everything, whether events evoked irritation or excitement, that he could not help but to be drawn toward someone so expressive, despite the excessively high volume at which Watanuki chose to convey his thoughts and feelings. Watanuki had strong opinions about just about everything and had no reservations about proclaiming them to everyone within earshot and even those outside what would be considered within the realm of possibility. If nothing else, Shizuka found him refreshing, a spark of energy and something different from the peaceful and reserved nature of Japan; Watanuki was unique at the very least and something very special at best, if those words could even begin to describe the boy accurately. Watanuki was loud and it was annoying more often than not, but sometimes Shizuka watched him shout and dance around and admired him for his brazenness with a smile in his heart, if not on his face.

Complaining If dictionaries had pictures, Shizuka was sure there would be one of Watanuki, his brow furrowed and his mouth opened wide with a protest half-formed, right next to the word “Complaining.” It was like an endless river that stretched on beyond site of the horizon, a wildly rushing torrent that crashed and swirled about, loudly drowning out the voices of anyone on its banks. Watanuki could be irritated by the smallest of infractions, infuriated and baffled in equal measures by the expressionless and sarcastic wall Doumeki presented and he never ceased in his whining about those flaws and mistakes.

Yuuko never seemed to mind, allowing the boy to insult her on a regular basis, making snide remarks about the state of the shop’s cleanliness, her drinking habits, the way she allowed Mokono and the girls to get away with anything, her bluntness with customers, the way she never answered questions directly, the list went on and on. Shizuka could not even begin to keep up with the problems Watanuki had with Yuuko, his workplace, or the inhabitants of the shop but apparently, despite his willingness to continue going there every day, he never failed to find something wrong with how they lived their lives and more than once he found himself having to tamp down on the urge to slap him or scold him for his rudeness to his employer.

It was not just Yuuko and Shizuka, either, but almost everyone and everything he came across, Watanuki found some character flaw in. Shizuka did not think Watanuki even realized how much he complained, though, it just came out of him. He supposed it was some sort of response the boy had developed from having been taught so well by his father. Watanuki had mentioned once or twice how it was his father who had instructed him on everything from cleaning to cooking to budgeting, how his mysterious and deceased parents had taught the boy from the moment he could understand their words how to take care of himself and to do it well and after so many years of experience and practice it was only to be expected that Watanuki excelled at household chores and responsibility in general. In a way, his complaining was a reflection of his great maturity, gained through the loss of his beloved parents and years spent on his own, however badly expressed that maturity may have been.

Watanuki was a perfectionist – he had been trained to do things properly and he followed through on those expectations his parents had placed on him and held everyone else to that high standard. Shizuka would never admit it out loud, but it was actually kind of nice to have someone hold him in high enough regard that it was simply expected that he would behave better or have healthier habits than he did. The other boy seemed to genuinely believe that everyone could be as energetic, responsible, and neat and organized as he was and remained oblivious to the fact that his scolding and complaining was never going to teach anyone because they simply could not be as put together as Watanuki was. So when he started once again with an angry monologue about this or that being stupid and everyone being ungrateful, Shizuka just took another sip of his sake and asked for tamagoyaki for dinner.

Selfless Shizuka could have made a fortune if he had received even a hundred yen for every time he had needed to step into the line of fire, so to speak, and pull Watanuki’s idiotic butt out of some other life-risking situation. The moron seemed oblivious to the fact that there was almost always another solution or option to the problems they found themselves in, almost always another method they could use to finish Yuuko’s missions for them in a way that would allow them both to come out unscathed, but the boy seemed to make it his own mission to come as close to death as possible at every turn.

Watanuki was not suicidal; it was, in fact, the exact opposite of that. Watanuki wanted to live desperately, wanted to keep going so that he could help as many people as possible, even if he spent the whole time grumbling about the inconvenience of it all. The problem was that in his line of work, or rather in Yuuko’s line of work, helping people usually involved extremely dangerous situations and characters and the worst of them always seemed to want a stab, often literally, at the shopkeeper’s young assistant. Even if they were not after Watanuki himself, the spirits or mystical creatures always seemed to have a vendetta against the shop’s customers and Watanuki seemed to be under the impression that it was his responsibility to protect them all and any damage to his own person was apparently irrelevant. He walked into one life-threatening situation after another, his stupidly blue eyes ignoring the danger around him that even Shizuka could see, even before the two of them shared an eye.

Sometimes Shizuka hated everyone – Yuuko, Kunogi, the Ame-warashi, and all the spirits – all for putting Watanuki in danger so often, even if it was usually unintentional. Over and over again Shizuka had to remind himself that these people all cared about Watanuki in their own way and none of them ever wanted the boy to get hurt, even if it sometimes seemed they were not smart enough to keep it from happening. Over and over again Shizuka did what he could to protect the idiot from danger and take the worst of the blows when that was not possible, but no matter how many times he shook his head briefly and darted forward to drag the idiot away from another monster or spirit, no matter how many times he watched Watanuki bear the abuse from another tormentor of a customer, he could never forget the soft smile the boy had when someone’s wish was granted. Shizuka lived for the moments when Watanuki bled and hurt in the place of another with fire in his eyes and a determined set to his mouth. Shizuka hated that Watanuki always found some reason to put another’s wellbeing before his own, but the way it always seemed to make the idiot so happy when another person stayed safe made it worthwhile.

[settana]

Doumeki’s Lust in xxxHOLIC Rou Adayume (Selfish Dream)

Cages wanting to trap him, hands wanting to grab him, mouths trying to devour him, shadows wanting to possess him…  Dreams are a reflection of innermost desires of your mind.

Yes, we know Haruka.

I’ve recently re-watched xxxHolic Rou Adayume (literally translated as xxxHolic Cage: Selfish Dream) and noticed how I felt more disturbed during Doumeki’s nightmare scene than the first time I watched it. At first, I thought it had been Watanuki trying to run from danger but that didn’t fit why he looked quite disturbed when talking to Haruka afterwards. Also, why was the OAD titled ‘Selfish Dream’? That could only mean Doumeki’s dream was selfish. But Doumeki and selfishness don’t go together, right? 

For me, the initial talk Haruka gave about selfish human hearts and the nightmare scene revealed the whole picture: Doumeki lusted after Watanuki but he knew his desires were selfish since acting upon them would be detrimental to Watanuki’s future. So, the later had to enter his nightmare and free himself from Doumeki’s selfish desires.

Allow me to explain why I believe it was ‘lust’.

At the start of the OAD, Haruka (out of the blue) says the following:

“Human hearts are selfish. They prioritize what they want over everything; even reason”. We can be sure Haruka told this to Shizuka when he was little and at the start of the dream he remembers how his grandparent often told him things he didn’t understand because of his immaturity. 

It would be safe to deduct that Haruka knew about his grandson’s fate encountering Watanuki and how it would affect him. I won’t go into details about the scenes with Watanuki but rather what he desired.

Doumeki and Watanuki (despite their fighting) are close and they do care for each other but it appeared as if Doumeki wanted more. However, if he were to have a relationship with Watanuki, he would die and Watanuki would remain alone. He knows Watanuki needs not only a human companion but also his spiritual energy and having descendants would solve the problem. 

This moment in xxxHolic Shunmuki was so precious because we can see both Doumeki and Kohane worried for Watanuki and promising themselves that they won’t let him be alone:

So, problem solved. Doumeki can still see Watanuki at the shop, hang out with him, tease him, eat his delicious cooking, and so on, and he will bring descendants that will take care of his friend. Doumeki knows what needs to be done and how to do it, so everything should be alright.

Except that it isn’t because that’s not what he wants.

The dream ends with Yuuko telling Doumeki not to hesitate. Then, we can see the following:

- A black viscous liquid flowing down 

Tears? Maybe I might be looking too much into it, but that could be a subconscious and metaphorical representation of sad, bitter tears. Maybe Doumeki was suppressing his tears.

- The black liquid forming a cage

It wants to trap something…

- The buildings breaking down

Doumeki’s walls are breaking down, his inner self is breaking down, the barrier he built up to hold himself is breaking down. Doumeki himself is breaking down. Note that before this scene, we see the black liquid on tree trunks, which represent a person’s stability.

- The remnants of the broken building trying to trap down Watanuki

He wants him for himself.

- Two moons aggressively joining together

This was subtle but disturbing when you see that after joining a window is broken. Joining together… something breaking…Something dripping out of where it broke… Do I need to be explicit here?

- A timid hand suddenly turning ferocious trying to grab him

This is where things stopped being so subtle. It appears as a strong desire to touch him. Which is disturbing considered what happened above. 

- A wall trying to trap Watanuki and a hand grabbing him

Once again, the desire to possess and touch him. This hand is more straightforward than the first one. After being grabbed, he is observed by two red eyes. Red is the color of lust, so it is possible that he is been seen with that desire. 

- Another hand trying to grab him

This is the third attempt. This time, this hand is much more aggressive. 

- A mouth trying to devour him

We’ve seen hands, now a mouth with fiery teeth. In foreplay, touching and kissing are essential parts, so now that we’ve seen desire to touch, we can see sexual desires linked with the mouth. I won’t go into many details since I want to keep it PG13. Also, the sharp teeth and the fact that he swallowed Watanuki can be seen as possessiveness as well.

- A mouth and deformed hands trying to grab him

Doumeki’s entire him wanting to possess Watanuki.

- The color ‘black’ through the entire dream

You don’t need to go through a spiritual school to know that black represents the opposite of purity when talking about energy. I am not going to tell you that sexual desire is bad, hence, it is black, since it is an essential part of human nature. However, Doumeki’s desire was shown as black, the most dangerous color of all.

This is because Doumeki has a pure aura and tries to do whatever is the right thing to do. We’ve seen how selfless he is through the entire series. We know that if he were to feel something for someone, he would like his beloved to be safe even if he himself is unhappy. 

Remember this?

Doumeki chose to “kill” her because Watanuki would be safe, even if Doumeki himself would be unhappy since Watanuki would hate him.

This is the kind of person Doumeki is: noble and purer in heart than most human beings but still not a saint.

So, we knew during xxxHolic that Doumeki cared about Watanuki but what we didn’t expect was for him to have other desires. He knows he must get rid of them, because acting upon his desires would be selfish and would make Watanuki unsafe. 

So now what Haruka said at the start of the OAD makes more sense:

So, it is not about Doumeki feeling regret of loving Watanuki and having to hold that feeling due to marriage. You can marry but love another person and be close to them, and we know that Doumeki and Watanuki are close as they spend a lot of time together. Or, Doumeki could love Watanuki as his closest friend. But this is not the case.

In Horitsuba Gakuen Drama CD 4, Doumeki grabs Watanuki’s chest under his shirt and claims that it was subconscious, while Kurogane wonders if it is ok to broadcast such a scene. Even if it is another universe, we are talking about the same Doumeki. And while that scene might have been played for laughs, it is still a weird “joke” to do for someone as Doumeki.  

This is why I believe the love Doumeki wants is the one belonging to a couple, which involves intimacy in both body and soul. Once married, Doumeki knows that he won’t have that kind of relationship as he must respect marriage vows and is his duty to keep Watanuki safe regardless of his own happiness. After all, he has given so much to keep Watanuki safe. His life revolves around him.

He knows his human heart is selfish, he knows his desires are wrong, so this is why they are painted in black and shown as vicious spirits. When Watanuki frees himself, he is finally able to move on with his duty, probably the one that was destined for him since birth that Haruka wanted to make sure his grandson properly fulfilled: keep Watanuki safe.

[existentialismee]

meet watanuki kimihiro, the young man who runs an orphanage out in cotes!

watanuki lost his parents at a young age, and practically grew up by himself. though the situation left him incredibly lonely and sad, his childhood inspired him to try and help anyone who was like him, thus leading him to open up his home into a place for orphans

has total mom vibes. he picks up after all the kids, cleans, cooks, gets them to school, makes their clothes-- the whole package! he’s only in his late twenties, but already has a huge amount of responsibility under his belt

even though his dream job was to become a professional chef, he’s really quite happy doing what he does now. watanuki had absolutely no family growing up, so he considers the kids he takes care of as just that. he would literally do quite anything for them!

as sweet and caring as he is though, he’s prone to having emotional outbursts quite often. the kids play pranks on him all the time just to get a big reaction out of him. he hates it and falls for it every single time

so, just to note: this watanuki is nothing like his immortal, shopkeeper self! his personality reflects more of who he was before yuuko’s death, though has simmered down a bit just because he’s matured. his home was once the shop he owned in cotes forest, but of course he has no memories of that currently! he’s just a normal human who has had absolutely no interaction with the supernatural

[itsclowreedsfault]

  WHAT IS YOUR ARCHETYPE?

from here. repost, don’t reblog! tagged by: @lunaticraccoon (thanks, dear!) tagging: @yukination, @tartan-llama, @hittintheroad

your archetype is the master.

(disclaimer: the master archetype is not a reflection of what a horrible person you are. ie: jyn erso and mary talbot are both extremely intelligent and driven people because they use their traits for good--although mary's character can be quite ambiguous in the earlier seasons)

traits: determined, obsessive, powerful, charismatic, confident, rash, challenging

the master is most commonly used to symbolize the antagonist, or the upper hand. while they aren't inherently the bad guys, their determination and ability to plan ahead can be twisted into something akin to evil. while that is a strong possibility in literature, their charisma and confidence can be utilized to create a strong idea and even an idea for the good side. many masters were the catalysts of revolutions, sparking hope and motivation. masters are extremely rash in their decisions, no matter how meticulous their planning may be. they tend to follow their instincts, and it's a good thing that they're so quick on their feet, otherwise, many of the challenges they face might have become uglier than expected.

fictional characters that are masters: tom riddle, jyn erso, thetis, mary talbot, irene adler, moriarty, tyrion lannister, cersei lannister, the joker

other personality types that go with this: alexander hamilton

I was tagged by @cutiebobo, @akumanonezumi and @kyorich (thanks my lovelies! :3)

Rules: Tell us your one favourite character from ten different fandoms and tag around 10 people

I already did this once so I’ll list different characters this time!

1. Natsume (Natsume Yuujinchou) 2. Watanuki (xxxHolic) 3. Laito (Diabolik Lovers) 4. Ukyo (Amnesia) 5. Yue (Cardcaptor Sakura) 6. Hitachiin Twins (OHSHC yes i know that’s two people don’t try to make me decide please) 7. Zan (SenMei) 8. Mikazuki Munechika (Touken Ranbu) 9. Natsuki (UtaPri) 10. Mutsumi Asuma (Watashi Ga Motete Dousunda)

[dawnscatters-a]

b: li tsubasa / li yì.

BASICS

Name: Li Tsubasa. / Li Yì

Alias: Li Syaoran.

Age: 18 / 25.

Gender: Male.

Sexuality: Bisexual.

Hometown: Hong Kong.

Height: 5'6". 167 cm.

Weight: 126 lbs. 57 kg.

Ethnicity: Half Japanese, Half Chinese.

Status: Alive.

PERSONALITY

Positive Personality Traits: Adaptable, alert, amiable, articulate, athletic, balanced, brilliant, calm, capable, charismatic, charming, clear-headed, clever, conscientious, considerate, contemplative, cooperative, courageous, cultured, curious, decent, decisive, dedicated, deep, directed, disciplined, discreet, efficient, eloquent, fair, faithful, firm, flexible, focused, forceful, forthright, gentle, good-natured, hardworking, helpful, honourable, humble, independent, innovative, insightful, intelligent, intuitive, leaderly, logical, loyal, magnanimous, mature, methodical, modest, neat, objective, observant, organised, patient, perceptive, persuasive, practical, precise, principled, prudent, purposeful, rational, realistic, reflective, resourceful, respectful, responsible, selfless, self-critical, serious, stoic, strong, studious, and wise.

Neutral Personality Traits: Absentminded ( occasionally, generally towards himself ), big-thinking, businesslike, busy, complex, confidential, crisp, deceptive ( at times ), determined, dominating ( at times ), driving, dry, enigmatic, frugal, intense ( at times ), invisible ( at others ), moralistic, neutral, noncommittal, preoccupied, private, questioning, quiet, reserved, restrained, skeptical, solemn, solitary, stubborn, and tough ( at times ).

Negative Personality Traits: Aloof, asocial, blunt, calculating, callous ( occasionally ), cautious, cold, crafty, cynical, deceitful ( at times ), difficult, disturbing ( at times ), escapist ( at times ), fiery ( at times ), frightening ( at times ), gloomy, grim, hesitant, insecure, mechanical, melancholic, miserable ( at times ), morbid, paranoid, passive ( at times ), regretful, secretive, single-minded, sly, steely, stiff, strong-willed, suspicious of others, tense, unhealthy, vague, well-meaning, and wishful.

BIOGRAPHY

Tsubasa / Yì was born in Hong Kong, son to Li Xiaolang and Li Sakura. He was raised in the magically and publicly influential Li clan, and he was taught magic, sword fighting, and martial arts. Seven days before his seventh birthday, he was given his father’s sword and his father’s name of “Syaoran” and was told that he could find his destiny elsewhere. After travelling to the Witch of Dimensions’s shop and finding out that his price was already paid, he was sent to another dimension, specifically to a country named “Clow Country” for seven days and met a princess named “Sakura”.

They became fast friends even though they could not touch even though “Sakura” was undergoing a cleansing ritual. However, when “Sakura” had a vision of danger approaching, Tsubasa vowed to protect her. Yet, when an unknown man, named Fei Wong Reed ( referenced as “FWR” in the rest of this history ), attacked “Sakura” during the cleansing ritual, Tsubasa hesitated on grabbing her hand because of instincts due to the cleansing ritual, and thus failed his chance to save her. The unknown man marked “Sakura” with a seal of death that would kill “Sakura” once she reached her fourteenth birthday.

Before Tsubasa could die to a second magical strike from FWR, Tsubasa was sent back to his original dimension, heavily injured. Vowing to save “Sakura” without sacrificing anyone’s lives, Tsubasa returned to Clow Country, having to pay the price of being unable to travel back home or to another dimension since no one in that dimension had the ability to travel to other dimensions or send others to another dimension.

He lived in the castle until the age of nine, but moved out into his own house and travelled the entirety of that dimension and researched heavily, trying to find a way to save “Sakura”. However, on their fourteenth birthdays ( as they shared the same birthdate ),  Tsubasa could not find a way to save “Sakura”, and the seal started to kill “Sakura”.

And then time stopped.

Nadeshiko, the Priestess of Clow Country and Sakura’s mother, managed to stop time for a few seconds, losing her life in the process. Tsubasa wished in his heart that he could turn back time to save “Sakura” from being marked for death…and a voice said that they could grant his wish. FWR said that Tsubasa could turn back time, but by doing so would break a taboo, and everyone who knew about the seal of death would be heavily affected, and the ripples of the taboo breaking would affect the multiverse.

Despite knowing the consequences, Tsubasa made the choice to turn back time, and his personal price was to be captured by FWR, and Tsubasa remained trapped and magically sealed, unable to move, touch, or feel for seven years until he gained enough magical power to break free from his imprisonment.

A child named “Watanuki Kimihiro” took Tsubasa’s place with his parents, and although Kimihiro was borne from Tsubasa, he was not exactly Tsubasa’s existence — he had a different personality, appearance, and magical abilities. Kimihiro grew up an orphan and, in high school, lived under the Witch of Dimensions’ protection.

A clone named Syaoran took Tsubasa’s place in Clow Country, and while the clone had originally been meant to be emotionless, Tsubasa sealed half of his heart into Syaoran, and Tsubasa could see all of the experiences that Syaoran had, learning everything that he did. Tsubasa even has learnt Syaoran’s fighting style and can fight like him if he so chooses.

However, Tsubasa was able to break free from his imprisonment, thus breaking the seal of the half of his heart in Syaoran. Syaoran went back to the control of FWR, and Tsubasa joined the travelling group of Princess Sakura, a clone of “Sakura,” Fai D. Flourite, Kurogane, and Mokona to both find Sakura’s feathers, which hold her memories, and Syaoran and stop FWR.

Their journey took them back to Clow Country to stop FWR and save both “Sakura” and Sakura ( who had been killed by “Syaoran” in a previous arc ), but in Tsubasa’s timeline rather than the new timeline. In the process, “Syaoran” was killed as he saved Tsubasa’s life, and when the group confronted FWR, the universe started to break. Once that started happening, Sakura and Syaoran returned, and everyone was told that the clones of Tsubasa and “Sakura” were reborn as created beings by the Witch of Dimensions and gave birth to Tsubasa ( and, in the new timeline, Kimihiro ).

Realising that giving birth to Tsubasa would mean that everyone would be trapped in a constant loop of time, Syaoran and Sakura attempted to break that loop by turning back their time to wait for the final battle in Clow Country, unable to touch each other for several years.

After a fierce battle, the group finally defeated FWR, but Sakura and Syaoran ceased to exist since the death of the Witch of Dimensions meant that their existence would fade away. As such, the soul of the clones returned back into the body of the originals, and both Tsubasa and Kimihiro were left disconnected from the universe as paradoxes due to the erasure of their parents.

As they are paradoxes, both Tsubasa and Kimihiro can negatively affect the universe with their presence. In order to lessen the impact Tsubasa will have on the universe, Tsubasa has vowed to continue travelling, also using his journey as a way to try to find a way to bring his parents back and to end his and Kimihiro’s paradoxical nature. “Sakura”, however, had to stay in Clow Country because she had a dream that her joining Tsubasa’s journey would make it all the more painful. Kurogane, Fai, and Mokona did decide to join Tsubasa, and they were off.

Two years pass, and Tsubasa has not been able to find a way to bring Syaoran or Sakura back. However, one night in Nirai Kanai, Tsubasa has a dream and sees Syaoran and tries to reach for him but is blocked by glass. In the next day, he was called to meet with the leader and the living God of the country and was told he was this “yūta”, a person who has been in the boundary of life and death in frozen time and is able to see the irregularities in Nirai Kanai and can save it from destruction.

In order to save it, Tsubasa and his companions travel to the other Nirai Kanai, which is where the dead, ironically, live. To Tsubasa, the other Nirai Kanai looks like a beautiful place, but to his companions, everything is dark, scary, and all of the people look like zombies. After nearly bleeding out due to a small attack, Tsubasa manages to make it to his destination called the Utaki while Kurogane, Fai, and Mokona were left behind.

In the Utaki, he finds Syaoran, and he is told his true purpose in the Utaki by both Syaoran and the voice of the Utaki. As the yūta with the power of seji, Tsubasa will be able to allow the dead souls of the other Nirai Kanai to be reborn into Nirai Kanai. However, Tsubasa can only do this if he fights Syaoran as the wielder of the seji must not possess a human heart. While he doesn’t want to fight Syaoran, he has to in order to make sure that his travel companions will not die, and so he strikes Syaoran down with lightning twice until Syaoran is unable to fight and is bleeding in Tsubasa’s arms.

While he tries to tell the Utaki that Syaoran cannot fight anymore, the Utaki tells him that he must continue until Syaoran’s existence is gone, and Tsubasa’s magic goes wild. However, Syaoran wakes up enough to stop him from exhausting himself and then passes out, and the Utaki says that Tsubasa is allowed to use the seji now and the Utaki stops time.

However, the Utaki realises that Tsubasa brought an impure magical item into the Utaki and thus would defile the Utaki as a holy place if Tsubasa does use the power of the Utaki to bring the departed souls back to life. Thus, the Utaki decides that Tsubasa cannot use the power, but Tsubasa enforced his will over the Utaki and decides to bring the dead back to be reborn and to defile the Utaki, and thus the Utaki tries to kill Tsubasa. Thankfully, “Sakura” and the God of Nirai Kanai use their powers and was able to save Tsubasa from the Utaki.

Tsubasa was able to give the God of the world a magical item that could create a new Utaki, and then he continues his travels with Kurogane, Fai, and Mokona, now newly determined to find a way to bring his parents back.

— I realise what a convoluted mess this manga is, and if you’re still very confused over what happened, trust me, you’re not alone. If you have any major questions about Tsubasa’s backstory, please feel free to ask me.

POWERS AND ABILITIES

Polyglot: Through Mokona, Tsubasa can understand and speak all spoken languages ( as long as he’s in a close enough proximity to Mokona ). Through living through Syaoran, Tsubasa can read in around seven different languages. Personally, Tsubasa is fluent in Japanese, Cantonese, Mandarin, and English ( although, he tends to have an accent with the latter ).

Swordsmanship: While no master swordsman, Tsubasa is better than most. He has been learning how to use a sword since he was around five years old, and he has continued learning through Kurogane, who is a master swordsman.

Martial Arts: Similarly to his swordsmanship, Tsubasa is no master but is a cut above most martial artists. He has been learning martial arts since he was four years old, and he has continued his education through Kurogane. His style is a conglomeration of the style his father taught him, the style Syaoran used, and the style Kurogane uses.

Magic: Due to having his magical training cut short at the age of six, Tsubasa’s magical education is spotty, made up of only the spells he remembers reading from the Li Clan spell books and training with his father. He primarily uses four spells for combat: Raitei Shōrai ( lightning spell ), Fūka Shōrai ( wind spell ), Kashin Shōrai ( fire spell ), Suiryū Shōrai ( water spell ). Still, he has strong magical powers, definitely above average for someone of his physical age. He can also use his magic to detect other life forms, dead or alive, and knows spells for protection and barriers.

Medium: As part of his bloodline, he can see and talk to ghosts and spirits of all sorts, and he can also use his magic to help guide ghosts to the next step if they need his help. His sight is not as good as Watanuki Kimihiro’s, as he can tell the difference between the dead and the living, but his sight is better than most other mediums.

OTHER MUSE INFORMATION

previous urls: tsubasaxli / taboobreakcr.

anniversary: december 2014

ship exclusivity*: featheredjudge’s tsukishiro yukito. *i will not ship with duplicates of these muses