#WHYYYYY TOM

[sincere1ystar]

plainclothes isn’t showing anywhere near me ☹️

[minhosimthings]

HEHEHEHE

No lube, no protection, all night all day from the kitchen floor to the dining table from the bed to church, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic exponential, logarithmic, while i gasp for air scream the lord's prayer, HE CAN TOP ME until I'm swollen, until I'm crying, until he's out of juice, until I cant walk, until I'm numb, until my throat hurts, until my cheeks are red, until the neighbours know his name, until my insides becomes outsides, until my hole remember the shape, until my jaws fall off, until my leg is useless, until my eyes are rolled back and it stays there, until my body does a backflip, until my whole body shakes, until the skin peels off, until my bones disconnect, until i pass out, until im paralyzed for the rest of my life, until all my eggs are fertilized, until all my holes are filled, until i cant breathe, until it gets longer than before, until he couldn't stand, until i die, until his tentacles dont come anymore, until my mouth cant eat, until i remember the length of it, until the end of time, until he dont have it anymore, until his hole remembers the size and girth, until it reaches my stomach, until hes grunting and growling, until he has to regenerate it, until the whole world hears . I'm gonna get him pregnant ten times over breeding him all day all night no protection just me and him all over the house on the floor on the couch on the bed in the shower on the rooftops even god couldn't pull me out of him.

Yeah I'm normal about him

[blackbatcass]

me buying the most dogshit stories for the chance to see My Girl.. (donna troy)

[helloimtired]

i neeeeeeeddd atteeeeeennnntttiioooonnnn but all my friends are busyyyyyyyyyy

[istillbelieveinmagic142]

Am I finally changing my profile to show that I like Loki now?

I am indeed. ❤️💚

Goddamn you, Marvel. 😭💔💔

I know what I want. I know what kind of god I need to be... for you. For all of us.

LOKI | 2.06 ‘Glorious Purpose’

[i-am-creacheur]

HELLO SORRY WHO WAS GOING TO TELL ME THAT JOEL AND JIMMY HAD A KID IN ESMP2????? AND LIKE JOEL IMMEDIATELY LEFT THE KID ON JEVINS DOORSTEP??? WHAT THE FUCK??? TINY TOM DID NOT DESERVE THAT AND JIMMY WOULD HAVE BEEN A GREAT DAD

I am actually going insane. Joel adores Hermes but he was so flippant about having a kid with Jimmy and then just giving them away? Huh? There has to be a reason... there has to be oh my god he would NOT ACT LIKE THAT

...

Sorry im just imagiing how awful it would be for Tiny Tom to watch Jimmy and Joel have a custody battle over them while they were born basically twenty seconds ago

Theres gotta be a lore reason for this. There has to be. BY ALL THINGS EVER WHYYYYY I am going to be sick. ALSO Joel couldn't tell Jimmy where he was taking Tom... imagine you just had a child with someone and they take the baby/toddler from your arms and say "great! You get to name them and then I will put them in a box somewhere in the street!" And you can't do ANYTHING about it. Oh my god

[reel-fear]

Whelp, Lone Wolf looks like it's gonna be continuing the trends I've disliked abt recent Bendy releases pretty well. Here are some of the things I noticed in the trailer and my thoughts about it in general. Yes they are mostly negative. They will also be in order of when these things show up in the trailer and some with timestamps & pictures.

So Bertrum is back! So so glad to see him and Bendyland return, I'm pretty willing to bet none of the BATDR cast will ever be seen again considering how forgettable most of them are, so I wouldn't hold my breath on that. I also however wouldn't hold my breath on seeing too many returning batim staff either considering how many of them are related to controversy now.

Bertie mentions it seems like something else has captured Joey's imagination and he's not as interested in Bendyland. I hope this is something like the machine or something and not Yet Another random Joey motivation thing/project to add to the timeline. Like Joey wanted to appease gods, become immortal, get money, get a family and Also do something else? Please just keep him consistent for two games in a row I'm begging.

Fun thing while watching the trailer watch how the video goes from having grey borders to weird black line borders and then none at all a few times. Our very polished and not at all rushed trailer folks.

Boris is using his batim model instead of the kinda weird one he had in BATDR which he shared with Tom. I'm glad for that though it is also a little strange he didn't get a newer one for a release all about him.

Why why why, are we going sci-fi now with all the machines and stuff? The ink machine was only really relevant in BATIM as the thing that brought these rubberhose monsters to life, there was no hint of all this... Nonsense in that game and I preferred it that way! Why do we have to also be like FNAF and lose that interesting aesthetic we started out with to become more like other more generic horror games? Why why why is Gent now the main focus I don't even think Gent was properly mentioned in BATIM?? Idk, I just thought the interesting personal drama of the hell-ish studio and the tortured residents in it was enough to carry the franchise, I didn't need an evil sci-fi company in the mix. I know BATDR already hinted at this direction but that doesn't mean this isn't still a massive leap from that game. We got shows of subtle but yes more advanced tech here and now we just outright have what look like turrents in the 1930s animation studio. Whyyyyy...

This animation looks bad. I'm allowed to finally say that right? Like the fluid simulation looks bad, the ink looks all chunky and low res, I mean it looks like the shit you see in that animated Food Fight movie. What is with the red? Why are we so eager to break the iconic pallete and art style THAT MADE THE GAMES UNIQUE. If I wanted to see a sci-fi adventure with blood and gore, I'D GO PLAY THE HUNDREDS OF OTHER GAMES THAT DO THAT BETTER!!! Don't remind me of better games I could be playing Mike! Why does Boris have a weird, anime ink, demonic power animation?? What is that???

Why are those things alive now, wasn't the bendy animatronic not doing anything enough of a disappointment? Why are we deciding only now to do something with them when most people are probably now gonna just be confused. Why are the machines alive? Did the ink machine do that? Did gent do that? Did the evil sci-fi company really see a boris themed animatronic and go 'ah yes the perfect evil killing machine for our evil motives'?? I have so many questions.

Also that thing was not designed by Lacie. At least the Bendy animatronic was designed in a way to be eerie but you could see how kids would find it appealing same way the Bendy cut outs were unnerving but also cute enough to pass as something kids would love. This is just. Childlish edgy design without considering that these were supposed to be designed with kids in mind. I wouldn't be so hard on this franchise for that if it wasn't something that was better IN PREVIOUS GAMES, like I mentioned with the bendy animatronic and such. Esp since it now has more competition with things like poppy playtime. I'm begging you guys if ur pc can handle Unreal Engine 5 please buy that instead of this garbage.

Also it seem this was the actual animatronic Tom stole the arm of since its design fits the redesign his robot arm got for dark revival. I don't really care too much about that but it is cool.

Now however for the scariest thing of all! Bendy's declining level of polish and increasingly rushed products! You've heard of the uncanny and weird expression Henry made in the cage trailer!

You've heard of the graphic novel being published with an obvious coloring mistake!

Now get ready for the ink demon's hooves stuttering and twitching like it were a poorly made physics object in the trailer for a game! [using a gif from the steam page since it shows it off really well]

I mean I shouldn't have to say anything more right? Like that's just inexcusable. We've reached modern Pokemon levels of not giving a fuck how bad our trailers look and still expecting people to buy it.

Now I'm gonna go into some stuff on the steam page for the game and then I'll get into some more general points:

Why does this franchise have such a hard time animating faces and humanoid characters? What is this Malice expression-

Also hints to the Boris is a person/Buddy thing? Are we keeping that? Is there just a separate version of Buddy for the games without any of the compelling parts of him in his book? Or is this now being used to reference something else?

Sammy shown off uh- touching a Banjo in a way that resembles playing it? Uh guys, could we not have given this trailer and steam page more time to clean these up a bit why are his movements so slow-

"Bendy: Lone Wolf™ will tests your ability to survive against ever increasing odds. Monsters and obstacles emerge from every direction as you journey into the rubberhose halls of the world's most evil animation studio. Every day is a challenge." Lmao rubberhose? Animation? I forgot those were parts of the franchise, after all you sucked them all out of the ink demon a while ago.

One of the gifs which I didn't feature has a jumpscare/flashing lights, I hope it will have a warning for those since Secrets Of The Machine still doesn't. I also don't know why we're keeping the jumpscares since most people rightfully made fun of how bad they were in the og game but. Idk taking feedback has never been good with this team.

Overall everything just kinda, sucks. the polish is gone from even the trailers. The art style becomes less of a factor with each game and the lore is so hard to keep track of even for die-hard fans. The comments on the trailers seem almost purely positive so far so that doesn't give me much hope they'll ever learn though... The top comment is a quote from DCTL too which is hilarious. Also Boris still has NO facial animations, even in his own game he'll never be an interesting character, why am I supposed to care abt saving him in BATIM again?

I'll be playing and checking it out more but probably only because I'm getting it for free since I had dark survival. Besides that yeah I wouldn't waste my money on it. I'll probably rip the assets to look at though. Can we please make some more critical comments on the youtube upload? I don't want people buying this garbage.

Anyways yeah just wanted to say all this, I'm gonna be working on more positive posts soon I promise and they will be Bendy related! Not the canon-stuff but the fanmade stuff so stay tuned! Bye!!

[skyfallscotland]

So the other day I went on a bit of a deep dive and used the wayback machine to find some of my old fanfic (may you never see it) but I was reading through my old comments (as you do) on my most popular fic from back then, that I started when I was twelve, and my god I have to share this with you guys 😭😂

We have come a LONG way and I think I maybe just blanked a lot of this out to keep myself going, because if current me was copping this, she’d be out, no more fic.

Consider this my official apology for forever saying fandom is so much worse than it used to be…It’s only mostly worse 🤣🫶🏼 that bright period in there was obviously the decade after this one.

Shall we stroll down memory lane together?

(trigger warning: homophobia)

Now, I’m not claiming my work was amazing (again, I was TWELVE) it was honestly terrible. Cringe as hell. But it also clearly had some fans because I got a lot of decent comments too (hundreds on a 19k word HP fic that I abandoned after a few years, that then did not survive the second great ffnet purge), and a lot of those comments after I was like “GUYS I’M TRYING HERE I’M ONLY TWELVE!” etc were like “wait, you’re what now?!” So that’s kinda nice 😌

But the point is, we all start from somewhere. I’ve been doing this ‘gig’ a while, no one is good overnight, at ANYTHING. I don’t even think I’m that good at it now. If you’re predisposed to writing, it still takes practice! And apparently the guts to weather…this.

Welcome to the 2000’s ✨

• look, i don't care if you've lost your inspiration... just ramble until you do

LOL

• could you upload quicker? i want more of the story faster!

😂 there was a little too much honesty going around

• Did you have to stop, I just started reading this story today and I already have fallen in love with it. I don't like it when authors stop the story half way through.

Me either!!! But you know, I had to go to school so 🤷🏼‍♀️

• I hate you. I just want you to know that. Not finish! Blec!

BLEC!!

It’s starting to make sense to me why I have a serious anxiety about not having a few chapters written ahead of time, my therapist would say that’s buried trauma ✨

• why why whyyyyy! Why must you stop on a cliffhanger!

just call me rebecca

• WELL, one thing for sure, your chapter ALL so freaking short!

Lmao this one didn’t age well 😌

• It's pretty pathetic that YOU'RE one of those TYPICAL cliche, boring authors that go with the knowitall and gold-digging WHORES then say Luna, who's under used and under-appreciated!

I made Hermione and Ginny friends of Harry. Like they are in the book 🙃 this person also commented on every single chapter in this style, hating everything—I know because no one used anon. Hiding your homophobia? Apparently Not trés chic!

• You'r an awful pweson who'll burn in hell.

I made Harry gay.

• Why is Harry such a girl?

Again, he’s not, he’s just gay. I think he also went shopping and bought some jeans (hp 2000’s fic shopping montage, whaddup?! ✌🏼)

• cant rembet why i click on there but there not GAY Harry is 100% not fag

How sure are you, though? He had some real great tension with Diary Tom Riddle, if we’re being fair. Also, it was clearly marked. I took up some of that valuable 20 character summary space TO mark it but the homophobes kept coming 🥲

• I like slash, but it has to be well written, and it’s completly unrealistic and wrong for harry to be a bottom.

There…was no sex involved. He went shopping for some pants. He found another male attractive. I’m?? Also not sure how you inferred that he would be a dominant partner anyway because even with Ginny you know damn well she’s on top 😌

• disgusting! you ruined such a good story.

Pretty sure this was also about ✨the gay✨

• Look, I'm not trying to flame, but after all this time of waiting, why are there so little words?

I was busy with seventh grade algebra hun!! Also, I was drafting by hand on paper and uploading from the FAMILY DESKTOP COMPUTER. I had to zero out every time someone walked past, hello???

• this story was kind of creepy and i know for a fact that animals leave the losing animal in the ground to claim their teritory.

I…actually have no idea what this was about and also whether it’s true 😂

• Please update as soon as possible

I just picture this person with a deadpan expression, typing with their pointer fingers.

• There's a lot of stuff that's unexplained here, add a little more detail and the story would be a lot better.

ok VALID babe, valid, lots of this same sentiment and I TOOK that advice, like if I got this as a twelve year old to my (online) face, I’m positive your fav millionaire authors can handle it if they happen to see it floating by in the netosphere!

In saying all that, there were some really funny comments too. People were generally a lot more creative when leaving comments back then (aside from the general rudeness 20-30% of them exhibited lmao).

• please dont leave me hanging..i look pathetic when i hanging...trust me on this one...visualize a wet cat stuck on a towl rack

Help, I’m whEEZING 😂

•I have no words to describe how I feel about you right now. That isn't even a cliff hanger you obliterated the cliff and tossed us into an abyss of unknown danger!

Some things don’t change I guess, sorry bout it 🤷🏼‍♀️

• (football caoch voice) move move move! u have readers on u go go go!

🤣 it really do be feeling like that

• You sure you're 13? You seem more like a demented 18 yearold to me. 

Thank you *bows*

Final considerations: Why could no one spell or punctuate? Glad we’re past that era 😮‍💨

But no seriously I think this is why people who were around for the 90s, 00’s and 10’s are so critical of fandom today, because we weathered THIS and ended up with something really great, and now it seems that’s being threatened more and more.

So whenever you see pushback against “today’s fandom” it’s coming from a place of “dear god, we’ve been in the trenches and we do NOT want to go back” 🫶🏼

My dear current readers, I love you endlessly for not being these people, good lord.

[birdybooboi]

who were they fooling

The Locker Scene™️

[ww2yaoi]

the only historical inaccuracy in bob that genuinely bothers me (besides them changing the date of hitler’s death for seemingly no reason) is that they show web with easy in england and before d-day like NOOOOOO NO NOOOOO I don’t even say this for historical purity reasons like idgaf what they change as long as it makes narrative sense and creates good characterization but that change is actively BAD for those two things like we should understand web is an outsider in easy from the start…. like okay I won’t complain about having more shots of that pretty boy BUT they don’t show him at toccoa and they don’t have him in day of days or carentan because obviously he wasn’t there with easy. so it’s like WHYYYYY you can’t put my dick in a little bit and then pull it all the way out TOM HANKS either give me the pretty boy or be consistent with your narrative. and this is why I retcon web being in easy at that time in all my fics they’re my dolls to play with now tom hanks you HACK. web was just lost in curahee let’s leave it at that 🩷

[snap-fyre]

I KNEW Tom making that video was a bad idea oh my God, literally whyyyyy. Why would anyone on earth start making a video on someone being a spy after they've just discovered that they are in fact, a spy, and about to go on a super secret mission.

I am glad they didn't cut off his thumb tho.

[devilsrecreation]

The Hunger Games: Cats and Dogs Edition

In this rendition, I’ve gathered some of the iconic dog and cat characters we all know and love! I only do 24 tributes so not EVERY dog or cat character is here but we definitely have some classics

(And yes, I did do Pete and Goofy cuz Pete’s technically a cat and we know Goofy’s a dog)

OH. And there are instances of characters offing themselves but instead I’m gonna say the whole thing is a big game where everyone who dies gets revived at the end and some characters choose to willingly forfeit the game. That means they’re taken out of the game, they lose, but they’re physically fine :)

Did like 4 rounds of this so here are the highlights:

Rowlf breaks Puss in Boots's nose for a basket of bread (ROWLF-)

Dudley Puppy scares Scooby Doo away from the cornucopia (lol that would happen)

Rita forces Sylvester to kill Puss in Boots or Rowlf. He decides to kill Rowlf (NOOOOOOOO)

Garfield, The Cat in the Hat, and Top Cat track down and kill Scooby Doo.

Bandit attacks Dudley Puppy, but he manages to escape.

Puss in Boots killing Lucifer for his supplies

Tom and Gromit tell stories about themselves to each other (lmao they’re both mute); same with Spike and Goofy (awww probably talking about their sons)

Courage stabs Pongo with a tree branch.

Snoopy sets off explosives in two different rounds like okay

Cheshire cat drowns in a frozen lake ( :( )

Sylvester severely slices Muttley with a sword

Dudley Puppy attempts to climb a tree, but falls to his death. Same happens with Pongo in another round (dogs can’t climb trees, idiots)

Top Cat throws a knife into Puss in Boots's chest.

Bandit really said “Fuck this I’m out” and willingly forfeit

Goofy falls into a pit and dies. (Cue the classic Goofy scream gfhfhfhfh)

Garfield poisons Courage's drink, but mistakes it for his own and dies

Top Cat begs for Snoopy to kill him. He reluctantly obliges, killing Top Cat (poor Snoopy bro)

Pete and Courage both threaten to willingly forfeit and the plan backfires so they’re out

Gromit wins round 2 by doing nothing cuz the others all formed a pact and forfeited the game. Gromit is Luigi.

I think Lucifer rigged a couple rounds cuz he won like twice.

For example:

NOT TO MENTION HE HAD LIKE 5 KILLS IN ANOTHER ROUND LIKE OMG TREMAINE CAN YOUR CAT CHILL????? (no wonder why he’s called Lucifer)

Dudley Puppy bashes Rowlf's head against a rock several times

It’s okay though cuz in like another round (where Lucifer won), Rowlf teamed up with Scooby Doo, and Snoopy where they track down and killed Dudley

Puss in Boots, Sergeant Tibbs, Spike, and Tom raid Bandit's camp while he is hunting (rude)

Dudley Puppy steals from Top Cat while he isn't looking AND teams up with Bandit, Snoopy, and Pete to raid Puss’ camp (Dudley’s soooooo ooc omg)

Muttley, Spike, and Cheshire Cat get into a fight. Muttley triumphantly kills them both

Courage tending to Snoopy’s wounds (AWWWWWW) and lets Gromit into his shelter

Top Cat tends to Kitty Katswell's wounds (such a gentleman); Tibbs does the same on like Night 5

Tom tends to Courage's wounds

Rita, Snoopy, and Kitty Katswell track down and kill Bandit (WHYYYYY)

Snoopy attacks Courage, but Sergeant Tibbs protects him, killing Snoopy

Rita sets an explosive off, killing Runt, Tom, Puss in Boots and Muttley

I bet Runt walked in at the last minute cuz there’s no way Rita would purposefully kill her best friend. Poor girl probably felt suuuuper guilty afterwards

Wolf Mutts!

Sergeant Tibbs throws a knife into Top Cat's head.

Tibbs: Has anyone seen my knife?

Top Cat: No, I didn’t see it but I know where it went. *dies*

Dudley tracks down and kills Gromit, leaving him to be the winner! Way to go, Dudley!

All this death happening on Day 2 and Bandit’s just picking flowers HFHFHFHF (this is the other round where Lucifer won)

Muttley poisons Courage’s drink but mistakes it for his own and dies (GOOD)

Goofy tends to Rowlf’s wounds (ok someone draw that cuz that is ADORABLE)

Cheshire Cat tends to Courage's wounds.

DUDLEY KILLS SCOOBY

Bandit thinks about home. (“I miss my wife, Tails”/ref)

During a feast, Pongo sobs while clutching a picture of his family (“I miss my wife Tails” pt 2)

Muttley poisons Courage's drink, but mistakes it for his own and dies

Sylvester poisons Dudley Puppy's drink. He drinks it and dies.

Courage kills Puss in Boots with his own weapon.

Cheshire Cat camouflauges himself in the bushes. (just wanted to share cuz it’s canon)

Rowlf forces Snoopy to kill Rita or Garfield. He refuses to kill, so Rowlf kills him instead (AYO)

Kitty Katswell lets Bandit into her shelter.

Courage taints Cheshire Cat's food, killing him. (He didn’t trust CC’s grin ig 😭)

Courage falls into a pit and dies. (I can HEAR Eustace’s “Stupid Dog! Ya lost the game!”)

Acidic Rain

OOOOOOOOOOOF. RIP Kitty :(

I’m so surprised Rowlf made it this far actually

Top Cat strangles Bandit with a rope.

So the winner of the last round is Top Cat!

[thatforgottenbasilisk]

the unofficial adventures of the unofficial archive group chat

Chapter 3 (AO3) (My Fic Masterpost)

Originally Posted on 1/15/2025

Rating: T

Summary:

in which we review the effects of Reading A Statement on martin, and decide how follow-up should be handled

OFFICIAL archive discord

#general

sash (❁´◡`❁): Soooo how did it go?

TIM TAM TOM: why are we in the work gc at noon on a SATURDAY

TIM TAM TOM: ah wait nevermind don't mind me

TIM TAM TOM: also seconded marto how are you did it kill you slowly

mahtin: I'm not bad? You were right about the brain fog

sash (❁´◡`❁): I'm usually right about everything

TIM TAM TOM: except for how to spell things

sash (❁´◡`❁): Shut your fuck up

sash (❁´◡`❁): You pretend that you're not using autocorrect with your autocaps turned off. You think you're so so sneaky. But I Know You Timothy Stoker

sash (❁´◡`❁): We both know. We know that you can't spell for shit either

TIM TAM TOM: ah well yes but you see

TIM TAM TOM: i've never shied away from admitting im a little bit stupid

sash (❁´◡`❁): Touché

TIM TAM TOM: anyway im sure poor marto feels like hes a third wheel with all of this witty witty banter

mahtin: Oh no not at all!!!

mahtin: Though I will say. I am a little bit tempted to turn off my autocaps as well

mahtin: All of my messages feel so serious next to yours Tim!!!!

TIM TAM TOM: youre right thats not the vibe we're aiming for

TIM TAM TOM: do it

TIM TAM TOM: one of us one of us one of us

TIM TAM TOM: for that matter

TIM TAM TOM: saaaash

sash (❁´◡`❁): No

TIM TAM TOM: but whyyyyy

sash (❁´◡`❁): Too much work

TIM TAM TOM: it's like two buttons????

sash (❁´◡`❁): I said what I said

sash (❁´◡`❁): It is what it is the capital letters stay On during sex

TIM TAM TOM: you're so mean to me specifically

sash (❁´◡`❁): Boo

sash (❁´◡`❁): Cry about it

mahtin: okay done!!!

mahtin: ah my messages feel weird? it's weird now?

mahtin: it's like they're naked

TIM TAM TOM: naked is how we are most comfortable

sash (❁´◡`❁): You, maybe, with those tight jeans you insist on wearing

TIM TAM TOM: sex appeal is my greatest asset in the workplace and you will not take that from me

sash (❁´◡`❁): If you're just going to whore yourself out then save it for the cops you flirt with

sash (❁´◡`❁): Don't waste it on us

sash (❁´◡`❁): All you're going to do is cut off circulation for Nothing

TIM TAM TOM: okay they're not That tight

TIM TAM TOM: and hey! i resent that! i flirt with everyone, not just cops!

mahtin: i don't know mate the cassettes have only ever mentioned cops

sash (❁´◡`❁): Yeah maybe diversify a little bit

TIM TAM TOM: im sorry the what

TIM TAM TOM: hodl o

TIM TAM TOM: wait

TIM TAM TOM: what does th at mena

TIM TAM TOM: martin

TIM TAM TOM: martin explain what the fuck does that mean

mahtin: the cassettes? that Jon records? those ones?

TIM TAM TOM: cannot emphasize enough how little that clarifies things

sash (❁´◡`❁): Have you not listened to any of the audio recordings?

TIM TAM TOM: NO????

TIM TAM TOM: IT'S JUST STATEMENTS WE'RE ALREADY DONE WITH FOLLOW UP FOR WHY WOULD I LISTEN

TIM TAM TOM: WHY IS MY

TIM TAM TOM: JONATHAN SIMS EXPOSED ME???? TO ALL OF RESEARCH?????????

sash (❁´◡`❁): You exposed yourself to all of Research

TIM TAM TOM: NOT THE POINT????

TIM TAM TOM: WHEN DID THAT COME UP

TIM TAM TOM: WHY DID THAT COME UP

sash (❁´◡`❁): I think you may have fucked your way into some police files

TIM TAM TOM: ohhhh right i did do that

TIM TAM TOM: WHY IS THAT RELEVANT TO THE STATEMENT????

TIM TAM TOM: im not mad mind you i really dont care

TIM TAM TOM: the whole institute knows im a hoe idgaf

TIM TAM TOM: im just sort of. flabbergasted? i feel is the correct word?

mahtin: in all fairness he spoke about it very briefly if I recall correctly

mahtin: just sort of. "yeah we got this info from files that tim obtained, somehow, because he has '''friends''' at the precinct"

mahtin: it wasnt explicit really its just that Jon has a way of saying things

sash (❁´◡`❁): Also we know you enough to read between the lines

TIM TAM TOM: fair? i guess?

TIM TAM TOM: i am still utterly flabbergasted

sash (❁´◡`❁): Okay Jon

TIM TAM TOM: OI

TIM TAM TOM: just because i use my words good sometimes doesn't make me POSH

sash (❁´◡`❁): Are you sure

mahtin: are you sure

TIM TAM TOM: yes very

sash (❁´◡`❁): Oh well can't argue that

sash (❁´◡`❁): Anyway

sash (❁´◡`❁): So how was that Statement?

sash (❁´◡`❁): I only skimmed it, that's why I'm asking

mahtin: oh you know

mahtin: ghost spiders

TIM TAM TOM: oh?

TIM TAM TOM: setting aside the fact that, since it won't record, evidence is in favor of ghost spiders being Real and True

TIM TAM TOM: please elaborate on the ghost spiders

mahtin: this poor man

mahtin: tortured individual and all

sash (❁´◡`❁): Yes yes yes, we all feel so bad, keep going tell us more

mahtin: haunted by the ghost of a spider he accidentally killed when he was a child

TIM TAM TOM: iiiiinteresting

TIM TAM TOM: i mean

TIM TAM TOM: i mean if i was murdered by some snot nosed kid i would haunt them too

TIM TAM TOM: i'd get my spooky on for sure

TIM TAM TOM: give em the scrooge treatment

TIM TAM TOM: honestly good for the spider

sash (❁´◡`❁): What happened to the man who gave the Statement?

sash (❁´◡`❁): Vittery, was it?

mahtin: yeah Carlos Vittery

mahtin: and I don't know? haven't done any follow-up yet

mahtin: remember I just read it yesterday

sash (❁´◡`❁): Sorry I forgot

TIM TAM TOM: you do this all the time lmao

sash (❁´◡`❁): I'm soooo sorry I get overexcited

TIM TAM TOM: i suppose i must accept your apology

sash (❁´◡`❁): :|

TIM TAM TOM: your emojis always hold so much emotion and yet. at the same time. none at all

sash (❁´◡`❁): Thanks it's a talent

TIM TAM TOM: youre welcome

sash (❁´◡`❁): Anyway

sash (❁´◡`❁): Back on topic

sash (❁´◡`❁): How is the follow-up going to go?

sash (❁´◡`❁): Jon has to sign off on any out-of-office investigations

TIM TAM TOM: and if he does that then hes going to read the Spooky Statement

TIM TAM TOM: defeating the entire purpose of asking martin to do it

TIM TAM TOM: (thanks again marto <3 youre a real one)

sash (❁´◡`❁): Exactly my point

sash (❁´◡`❁): What's the game plan?

mahtin: okay everyone hear me out I've got a wild solution

mahtin: i know it's going to sound insane

TIM TAM TOM: im on the edge of my seat

mahtin: nobody goes and does out of office investigation on this statement

TIM TAM TOM: youre right thats brilliant

sash (❁´◡`❁): Why would you say something so controversial, and yet so brave?

mahtin: i know, i know

mahtin: thank you everyone

mahtin: or alternatively we just mark down the address of the place and the next time it's on the way to/from somewhere we're already investigating we just... detour?

sash (❁´◡`❁): I like that one much better

sash (❁´◡`❁): That way we investigate it, and all the paperwork is in order, plus Bouchard doesn't start breathing down anyone's neck

TIM TAM TOM: ugh god dont remind me

TIM TAM TOM: my day was going so well

TIM TAM TOM: just thinking about eli*as,,, horrid

TIM TAM TOM: especially. ESPECIALLY. on a goddamned saturday

TIM TAM TOM: ughhhhh and jon always crosses the line from "jon-bitchy" to "REAL-bitchy" whenever bitchard gets himself involved

sash (❁´◡`❁): Exactlyyyyy nobody wants that!!

TIM TAM TOM: nobody wants that!!!

[blimbo-buddy]

this fandom praises the most boring and/or awful toms for the worst reasons. no, fartwhisker the 2nd is not a "complex and interesting character" just because he did a good thing one (1) time

tree - he's interesting, in his own way, but that's about all he's got going for him. i dislike his entire thing with violetshine (violetzelda otp) and generally hate his whole selfish disregard for the sisters during squilf's hope, and his refusal to seek them out in tbc. i think he's a good father though, i just... don't like anything about him outside of that.

alderheart - boring as all get out. he's what you'd get if you took leafpool, made her a tom, and stripped her of all her individuality. also... sparkpelt should've gotten his arc. it's just the truth

fernsong - ohhhh i HATE this guy... he pressures ivypool into having his kits claiming that *he'll* raise them in the nursery... only to not follow through. he doesn't even hardly interact with his kits at all, leaving that to ivypool... i want to throw him off a cliff

rootspring - no personality, whines about how he's "so different and special", weirdly pushy when bristlefrost turns him down multiple times, doesn't take 'no' for an answer, and essentially overtakes bristlefrost's chapters midway through tbc out of *nowhere*, where suddenly she reciprocates his feelings apparently???? rootspring sucks, hate to say it! (i actually prefer nightheart to him. nightheart is more selfish and disagreeable, but he has his rare good moments too - specifically in thunder w/ frostpaw, i enjoyed their friendship. i hate nightsun though, whyyyyy cant those two just be friends)

thrushpelt - he's a nice character, and i do enjoy him for what he is, but his popularity is... confusing to me to say the least. he's kinda just generic, i guess, and i feel he gets *way* too much praise for it (similar to brackenfur, oakheart, or poppyfrost in that way)

100% I completely agree, the male characters do the bare minimum and they're praised for it and made out to be this great and complex character

Tree: His entire concept is interesting but it's all fumbled so fucking bad, I gotta find the post but I saw something that talked about how Tree felt like he was made to overshadow TwigBranch and I couldn't agree more. I hate his dumb fucking "What if MEN were OPPRESSED and WOMEN were SUPERIOR" backstory thing with the Sisters. And the thing is that the Sisters are a cool concept but they try and demonize them so bad, they're interesting in concept but in execution it's awful. I hope Tree dies actually

AlderHeart: It should have been SparkPelt, that's all I'm saying. Everything about his character should have been given to SparkPelt, I agree. Also nowadays to me, he doesn't really read as having anxiety. SMUDGE reads as having anxiety more and he's a background Kittypet.

FernSong: Let's execute him.

RootSpring: Kinda like Tree in that his concept is neat but execution sucks ass. "Waaah waah I'm ostracized for my ghost-seeing powers in a society that knows that ghosts are real and worships them, woe is me :(" I'll kill you. He should have died alongside BristleFrost and ShadowSight

ThrushPelt: I do like his nice connection with BlueStar but beyond that he's pretty alright. I don't hate him he's 100% a character that I'm pleasantly reminded of from time to time

[harrywavycurly]

10 and 21 for Get To Know Me!✨

Hiii babes!!!

10) What's your favorite book? My favorite book of all time is probably the first book I ever read that when I was done I immediately wanted to read it again and that would be Queen of Camelot by Nancy McKenzie. I friggin loveeee it so much.

21) A song that evokes a good memory? One of them would be Delilah by Tom Jones and the memory is just that’s the song my nana blares when she would clean the house when I was little and she’d be singing at the top of her lungs while vacuuming and you’d be upstairs and you’d just hear “why why whyyyyy Delilah!!!” and you’d just know that meant nana was cleaning 😂💖

[cherienymphe]

Coriolanus snow as older Draco malfoy if he actually aged well

No really because whyyyyy did they make Tom look like that in the epilogue? I remember that pissed me off so bad like was this my punishment for being a draco fan? Also another fun fact but idk if any of y'all watched Bertie Gilbert on YouTube years ago but he played scorpius in the epilogue