#WHY DID I CALL CHILDE A WEENER???????

[minimujina]

also i shifted a bit earlier, and like i met childe— we were doing the weekly boss fight. i shit u not my guy— childe is so expectant that he’s like “heyy you’re back!! shall we spar to the death again comrades?” but we still won and like, he’s usually knocked out when we fight.

hhh lumine and the rest (this time it was xiao and zhongli accompanied us) left or just stayed a bit behind with me. i helped childe with his wounds BC MAN— i scripted that i personally won’t feel any pain even if im like heavily injured, BUT DEAR LORD DOES HIS ATTACK AND EVERYONE ELSES SEEMS SO PAINFUL. when childe wakes up, he usually gets pretty embarrassed. teased him for a bit before doing the usual fixing up his wounds. generally, he’s a cool guy, and if we were to minus his bloodthirsty maniacal energy, he’s very fun to hang around with.

ALSO WITH XIAO AND ZHONGLI. dear god, zhongli, i had to held back multiple remarks to not get my ass lemented by xiao— zhongli is indeed a father figure, a very tired father figure for sure. maybe bc he reminds me of my history teacher, i don’t bring myself to be close to him. it’s the same with xiao. actually, you know how he’s pretty much distant? still the same concept, BUT THERE WERE MOMENTS WERE HE PULLS ME TO THE SIDE TO PROTECT ME FROM GETTING HURT BY CHILDE’S ATTACK AND I JUST??? he would say “sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable” “bear with me for a moment” “sorry, you were about to get hit” MY GOD THIS MAN—

also zhongli’s shield? MY GOD THAT SHIT FEELS LIKE YOUR IN A LIKE THOSE SHOWERING BOXES? that, but more durable—

literally i am so sorry for like this ramble. the dr was really fun earlier

BITCH THIS IS SO COOL I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO REACT PLEASE DONT APOLOGIZE THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY

i cannot imagine being able to really meet all of them ?? this is so cool to hear abt, im shaking aibsjsj AND CHILDE PLS HES SUCH A WEENER

AND GIVE ME THIS XIAO. GIVE HIM TO ME. PUT HIM IN MY HANDS SO I MAY HOLD HIM GENTLY AND GIVE HIM VERY TENDER FOREHEAD KISSES.

[imgonnagetkilledbynutstink]

Mcelroy quotes

"OH GOD OH FUCK HES GONNA EAT MY BONES" "YOUR TOUCAN BONES"

"Toucan Dan the spooky badooky toucan man"

"Listen kids, people are gonna try to give you guns all the time, but theyre no cool. Listen to Toucan Dan. Chili dogs"

"I wish we had lorenzo music on call" "i think he passed away" "... i wish we had lorenzo music on the planet, then"

"WELCOME TO THE STARSHIP FUTURE TIMES"

"I come for you in the sleeping hours!"

"Is he your son or your husband?" "My sonsband"

"Can i be strong?" "I think you are strong" "no i need to be stronger... like king of the universe strong"

"Gonna put you in this prison toilet... cause thats what you are, you're a stink man" "garbage boy" "garbage boy stink man"

"She looks like a human goldfish"

"No eyelids??? WHY IS THAT AN OPTION!? YOU NEED THOSE"

"Hey whats going on in here??" "NOTHING, TRASH HULK. ME AND METAL HUSBAND ARE COOKING YOU A MEAL WHICH I WILL FEED YOU IN BABY BOTTLE CAUSE YOU. ARE. MAN. BABY"

*types in "pam the existence eater"*

"COME TO ME MY SHAUN-STER"

"HAS ANYONE SEEN MY VERY LITTLE HUSBAND!?"

"Hes not my love child anyways. My love child is like, a can of peas back at home"

"HES LIKE A ROTTISERIE CHICKEN"

"HAVE YOU BEEN TO MY FOREST OF SONS??"

"Did you literally do anything to trigger that?" "I tried to turn everyone into dogs and i get why the game wouldn't like that!"

"HONEY I SHRUNK THE YOU"

*types in "set underwear to no"*

"The force of these things being birthed from my womb is gonna push me through the ceiling"

"HES LIKE A HUMAN BOTTLE OF OLIVE OIL"

"I want his soul in a jar so i can put it on my desk"

"OH... YEAAAAH GHOST DAD"

"My boy Stevo's gonna drink an alligator's weener"

"Please stop throwing me off if tall shit"

"Having been recon- dont- pit- stop- throw- dont- throw- if you- dont- stop- throw-"

"You're on some next level shit. I gotta start throwing my children"

"Great bones, man" "thats a high quality set of bones in that goblin"

"You ready to make some genuine wrestle boys?"

"My perfect baseball son"

"I CAN SEE HIS MOUTHY MOUTH GUMMY WORKS"

"Aw beans, i look like a real goober"

"Thats true... thats a real good point griffin, i guess ive never blamed god for rats before"

"Holy shit... LOOK AT RAT BABY'S MADDEST HOPS"

"I dont knwo what you want me- i goofed up very good"

"This isnt my grandpa's Dark Souls" "no its your grandma's Dark Souls if your grandma is a witch that hangs out behind the Arby's"

"Hey dude? Your desk is pizza. Like, i dont want to tell you how to do your thing... but your desk is pizza"

"That movie is piss... that movie is piss. End of sentence, end of thought"

"It looks like you're falling into a portal that is a man"

"Hey guys, its president Obama. Ive been watching the entire time, and no"

"Thats my hero wood"

"He looks like a skin diaper"

"Like if Bill Nye amd Bill Nye had a baby with a mushroom. What would that look like? And the answer is a sad dinosaur"

"JUSTIN, THE BLOOD DINOSAUR IS BACK"

"I cant believe i have to play this normal!"

".... HOW DID THAT GIVE ME MORE PANTS!?"

"Youve taken me to two sex dungeons amd this is the worst place youve taken me so far! Its full of demons and it crashes my computer!"

"Im gonna get some poppy corn" "no we cannot stay here" "im staying and im getting some fucking poppy corn"

"Tonino's, i was possessed by the bad chair"

"I think these two people are about to have sex- should we go? Should we go? Should we go? Should we go? I just shot myself off the space station"

"I just clicked on your wings and it asked me if i wanted to finger your wings??" "Where are you?" "I think im in hell?"

"Theres so much nudity in Second Life! Its like 🎶everywhere you look there's a breast or three🎶" "🎶on the same person🎶"

"Oh god the anime vagina's back... its right next to a place called Muddy Country"

"I lost what makes the boy mayer a boy mayer... now he just kinda looks like a man mayer"

"I hope thats not disconcerning for them... to see a skateboarding pizza man and a trash boy"

*types into chat "pizza crime is eternal"*

"I just made myself kinda a boy hat?" "Well the good news is, now she has a reason to drink"

"WHATS UP EVERYBODY, I THINK DOGS SHOULD VOTE"

"I just told them i think its so progressive that they let skateboarders in and they booted me"

" ive made kinda a pizza party prison- like a personal panned pizza party prison?"

"The music is actually so loud im kinda having a panic attack" "to southern country?" "Yeah"

"I simply cant" "you can't?" "Not with the Bart"

"Someone has a sign with trump holding all the chaos emeralds"