#Violet and Arkady being Soft? It's more likely than you think

[swiftwyll]

“Why opera?”

“Because it’s big, and loud, and stupid. And you know ahead of time if it’s gonna be a comedy or a tragedy.”

[jaggedwolf]

TSCOSI Ficlets #2

Not being from the US

"So, Jeeter, what'd you learn this week?" Arkady plopped into the seat opposite him, stealing one of his fries. "The horrors of Fahrenheit?"

"Man, that was day one of international student orientation. We're on to way more advanced terrors now." Brian considered a token protest at the fry-theft. Eh, he'd get her back when she got dessert.

Arkady shrugged off her backpack. "Why do you even bother still going?"

"It's mandatory."

"Like you give a crap about that."

"Gotta be up to date with all these cultural differences."

"You're Canadian."

"Hey man-"

"And you told me you spent every summer in the States, anyway," Arkady said, looking suspiciously at him. Well, she tended to look suspiciously at a lot of things, so it wasn't the worst sign. "There's no reason for you to subject yourself to-"

A wide grin crossed Arkady's face. Oh no. "Wait, they're also an international student, right?"

"Maybe," said Brian defensively.

"Now, remind me what you said about their cheekbones?" Arkady's voice sounded even more delighted.

Brian pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his head, and buried his head in his arms on the table. His voice muffled, he said "Drinking with you was a mistake."

"I for one, could not be happier that Tripathi took pity on a couple of freshmen and did us that favor."

Brian groaned. Three months into the school year and he still didn't understand how or when Arkady and him became friends.

"Should have guessed you'd be a poetic drunk." Arkady clapped him on the back. "Woah, speaking of-"

She tugged his sweatshirt. Brian reluctantly looked up, following her gaze to find the subject of their discussion striding towards them.

Yep, Krejjh looked about as handsome as they always did. That was fine. Their pace slowed as they approached the table. "Hey, it's Brian, right?"

"That's him," chimed in Arkady. "And I'm going to get some actual food now instead of skimming off Jeeter's"

She abruptly stood up and left. Krejjh seemed startled by her departure and asked "Is this a bad time?"

They sounded oddly hesitant, not at all like how Brian had heard them speak with their friends.

"Nope." Brian shoved back his hood. "Arkady's just like that. Do you want a fry?"

Holding your hand in mine

Arkady's always appreciated privacy. Couple of decades of sleeping in crowded rooms will do that to you. Being alone can be nice.

Being alone sucks a hell of a lot more when you're dying in one of Zone Z's dim-lit hallways.

Asshole shot her and her comms before she took care of him, and she supposes she'll only have his body for company as blood spurts out from under her collarbone. The instinctive pressured she applies slows it down. Not quick enough. He'd picked his shot well.

It's a waiting game now. She might as well distract herself. After all, hiding from the world in foolish dreams is a talent she's cultivated.

It's easy to paint a picture, as the world becomes fuzzy. No one could fault her for it. If someone wants to, she's not exactly going to be around to take their complaints. She squeezes her eyes shut. Folds herself smaller into the corner. Presses the heel of her right hand harder into the bleeding wound. Ignores how slick it feels. She's going to lose this fight, but like hell she's not clinging on all the way down, fingernails dug deep into life.

Back to the imagining.

What does she want, in these final moments?

What doesn't she want, is the better question. Her dreams had always been too stupidly big for reality. And yet. This is...this is a better death than she ever thought she'd get. Not much more to ask for. To her mind's rendering of the scene, she only adds a couple of selfish touches.

Long, soft fingers curl over the back of her right hand. They push insistently, added pressure to the wound, steadily, as if confident they can fix this. Fingers she's seen idly drum the table in the mess hall, fingers she's seen wrapped around a hypodermic syringe, fingers she felt trail through her hair just this morning. A presence that refuses to leave.

A rougher palm meets that of her left hand. The resulting grip is firm. Gentle. The calluses have a different contour from her own. Earned from building, where hers were made from breaking. They press against each other in a way that feels right anyway. Feels right, like twice-offered new beginnings. And even now, offering more.

It's good, Arkady thinks, that this is how it goes. Her alone.

Wouldn't be fair to them any other way.

Lesbian gaze

The ship turns out to be a monstrous patchwork, but Tripathi promises it'll fly, so she busies herself with staring at her new ID card. Arkady Patel. The card is new, nothing like the faded, scratched-up one in her back pocket. She'd gotten that one when she enlisted, been excited as hell about it, actually.

"Hey, Arkady?" asks Tripathi, sounding apologetic and swiveling the pilot's seat. "Could you check the local channels to see if they're tracking us?" Tripathi nods her head towards one of the panels.

She grunts in affirmative, shoves the ID card into a pocket and makes herself useful. She's mostly blocked out the pain. The channels are clear, takeoff goes without a hitch, and an hour later, they're as free as can be.

She could fish out that ID card again. There's a lot of people she's imagined being. Arkady Patel's the first one she actually will. If the IGR doesn't end up finding them first, that is. But that's not the name echoing in her head.

That would be Sana Tripathi.

Who's busy piloting, which means she can get away with looking her over. Tripathi's hair had been longer back on Cresswin, a single black braid that moved with her head through with every point made in those meetings snuck into. Now, Tripathi's hair isn't even shoulder-length. Nice and practical. Grey roots too. Tripathi seemed a little young for that. Not that she actually knew the woman's age, come to think of it.

There was a lot she didn't know about Tripathi. Maybe less if she counted Cresswin, and maybe she should, since Cresswin's what landed her here but - people changed. From time. From the war. From working a shitty job day-after-day. Easy enough to slip on an old skin if it got you a desperately needed crew member.

Not that it matters. She isn't looking for the noble, non-existent hero her teenage self had fantasized about. Now that she's on the IGR's bad side, she's pretty fucking good with settling for a place to sleep and food to eat. She can wait this out. See who Tripathi ends up being, and see if Tripathi figures out she isn't worth the trust.

Till then, she'll keep an eye on her new boss.

Low Expectations

It's ludicrous, he thinks, how exposed he feels without his eyepatch. Even more so when Violet's gloved fingers rest on his skin where the edges of the eyepatch would have. No matter. The feeling is a sign he has let himself become too comfortable. He's been far more exposed.

"Can you open the eyelid?" asks Violet.

There's that familiar half-second where he expects his range of vision to expand, and it grates on him, that his body has not yet adapted to its new reality. He opens his eyelid as wide as he can.

If Violet is perturbed by the sight of an empty eye socket, she doesn't show it. Her head comes closer to inspect it, fingers shifting slightly along his skin, and he tilts his face towards her to make it easier.

"Thanks," mutters Violet.

His hands start to tremble.

They're not in Violet's line of sight. He has the time to compensate, and the freedom to move his hands, so as carefully as he can manage, he grips his knees. He forces himself to start speaking, informing Violet of the current status of his eye socket and how the IGR had healed it.

It's no challenge to keep his face still. Whatever they do could only hurt more with unexpected head movements, they'd told him.

Eventually, Violet pulls back. Her fingers leave his face. Before he can even take a breath of relief, Violet pauses midway through turning to grab something, a concerned look on her face. "Park, you're shaking."

"I-" When Park looks down, he sees that his knees have joined his hands in trembling uncontrollably. His mind blanks. "My apologies," he acknowledges, "it shouldn't affect the checkup."

"What?"

He'd given an uninformative answer. Needed a better explanation. "My head. It shouldn't affect my head, so-"

"Park," interrupts Violet quietly, a slow frown taking over her face, "I think we're done for today."

Wooing with sharp-edged gifts

As soon as Arkady was unhorsed for the last time, and her opponent declared the victor, Sana appeared out of nowhere to act as her crutch.

"You should be escorting Rumor, not me," Arkady pointed out, her helmet weighing down her free hand. Her left foot throbbed when she put any weight on it. "Who knows what she'll get up to without your supervision?"

Sana huffed, her armor clanging against Arkady's. "I could say the same about you. Besides, Krejjh is handling her fine."

Sure enough, a glance behind revealed Krejjh eagerly chattering away to Sana's steed. They swung a leg over to ride even that short distance to the stables.

"Showoff," muttered Arkady. "Krejjh bribes your horse with too many sugar cubes."

"Be that as it may," continued Sana, "I'm afraid there'll be no escaping the medical tent today. It's tournament day! We're safe, you need to get your leg taken care of, and if something happens you'll have the simple pleasure of saying 'I told you so', won't you?"

"It's not a pleasure."

Sana ignored her, holding up a flap of the tent they'd arrived at for Arkady to hop under. She did so, making sure to look as annoyed as possibly, and Sana followed, supporting Arkady over to the nearest cot...where Violet stood expectantly.

Sana flashed a quick grin at Arkady. "You know what, Kady, you're right, I should go check on Rumor. Just remember you did your best out there." With that, Sana nodded at Violet and exited the tent so quickly it was as if she were never there.

Arkady frowned at Violet. "Liu. Wasn't your shift yesterday?"

Looking amused, Violet replied. "They're hardly going to complain about an extra hand. Let's get that armor off your leg."

They did. Arkady winced the whole time, cursing herself for her choices. Jousting, really? Arkady would have fared better in the melee, her own two feet and her weapon of choice to depend on.

They could hear cheering from the lists from even inside the tent. Another bout ended, then. Violet examined Arkady's foot, fingers pressing various spots around the swollen ankle.

As if reading her mind, Violet asked, "Why the joust?"

Embarrassed, Arkady shot back, "You mean, why'd I pick something I'm so piss-poor at?"

"You won your first two bouts," said Violet mildly.

Oh. She'd been watching.

Of course she'd been watching, how else would she have known to come to this very tent? Even Sana's encouragement didn't extend quite that far.

Violet continued, "You've never mentioned it when talking about other tournaments."

The simple, foolish answer was the smallest prize the winners received. A single rose, fresh from the royal garden, to be presented to whoever they chose.

The melee was an ugly, crowded thing. It was not the melee's rose lauded in those songs she'd loved as a child, snatches of music caught in taverns and lyrics sung in street games, and it was not the melee's rose she had wanted to give to Violet. It was not the melee she had wanted Violet to see her fight in.

It was not after the melee she had wanted to broach a topic she had thought unbroachable.

Yet it was the ugly things in life that Arkady was good for, and so she was left here with empty hands and another injury.

Arkady half-smiled at Violet. "Thought I'd try something new."

"I...don't think that's the whole answer," said Violet, but she didn't press as she normally would have. She turned to her satchel, retrieving a cloth bundle and unwrapping it to reveal a dagger, sheathed in dark leather. It was good work, deceptively simple. She wondered how much coin it had cost.

Violet took a deep breath and then spoke slowly. "You probably haven't been counting the days but, um, it's been a year since you saved me from that ambush. A little less than that since you cleared my name."

Had it been that long? Had it been that short?

Violet pulled the dagger out of the sheath. The dagger's edges gleamed in the snatches of sunlight filtering into the tent, but Arkady only had eyes for the sharpening of Violet's gaze.

"You told me, once, that I didn't know what you'd done. What you'd do." Violet sheathed the dagger. "I do now."

She offered out the dagger, pale fingers around the sheathed portion of it, her face tentative yet determined. "A gift. A thank-you. You don't"-A short laugh escaped Violet-"Refuse it if you will. I just thought I ought to say it."

"I-" For once, Arkady didn't have the words to respond.

Instead, she took the dagger, and let the slowly growing smile on Violet's face be answer enough for them both.

[iffeelscouldkill]

it only means there is no room for you to fall [Epilogue]

A/N: This is a follow-up to it only means there is no room for you to fall, my alternate post-episode-5/episode 6 Sana/Arkady/Violet fic that I wrote uh... last September, wow. It won’t make much sense if you haven’t read that, so go read that fic first!

Those of you who follow me on AO3, or who followed the fic on AO3, will know that I already wrote and posted an epilogue to this fic about a week and a half after it was written. But I never posted it to Tumblr. I liked it, but I also wasn’t that happy with it - there was too much “plot”, and not enough of the fluff and indulgence that I’d so enjoyed when writing the first fic. And I liked how the first fic ended, so I sort of wanted that to be a stand-alone on Tumblr, until I was happier with the epilogue.

I never intended to rewrite it - I was originally planning to write a follow-up fic or two in the same ‘verse, and figured that once those were written, I would post the epilogue to Tumblr first so that it made sense. However, I lost a bit of steam with the next fic in the series, so that didn’t quite happen.

Fast-forward to now, and... well, I’m sure I don’t need to spell out why I needed a dose of fluffiness and self-indulgence in my fic-writing life. So, I decided a couple of days ago to have another go with writing this epilogue, and see if I couldn’t write a version that I was happier with. Turns out I could! Here it is :D

---

The first thing that Sana is aware of when she wakes is that she’s very, very warm.

The second is that someone is playing with her hair, carding their fingers through the strands that have escaped from the loose plait she wears it in. It feels nice. Sana closes her eyes again.

A vague memory filters through the sleepy haze in her brain. Arkady and Violet hugging her. Arkady leading her into her room, pulling her down onto her bunk, wrapping her arms around her. Violet at her back. She realises that she can hear voices talking softly.

“...might wake up and decide that she can handle it without our help.” Violet’s voice. “She is the Captain, after all.”

A snort from Arkady on her other side. “You underestimate my willingness to flat-out pin her to this bunk until she admits that she can’t handle everything by herself.”

Sana cracks one eye open. “I’d like to see you try.”

She feels Violet jump behind her, but Arkady just smirks, unrepentant. She looks slightly softer-edged in the morning (well, Sana realises that she doesn’t really know for sure that it’s morning, it’s hard to tell on the ship), her normally carefully tamed hair in unruly tangles around her face. It’s a look Sana has only rarely had the privilege of seeing.

“How did you sleep?” asks Violet, and Sana turns to smile at her.

“Like a log. I hope I didn’t snore.”

Violet laughs. “I don’t think so. I would know if you did - I’m a pretty light sleeper. It comes from being a medic,” she adds by way of explanation.

Sana is about to say something else - ask what the time is, maybe - when a key part of the previous night suddenly comes back to her: Ricky Q’s smug voice on the other end of the line. His threats against her crew, and the rendezvous on Hafizah. Sana groans as her head starts to throb slightly.

“Sana?” Violet looks worried, reaching forward to brush strands of hair gently from her face. Sana realises that Violet had been the one playing with her hair when she woke up, and she takes a moment to delight in this tiny gesture of affection from the other woman, who had always seemed quite reserved in her interactions until now. They would brush past each other, sometimes, in the narrow kitchen, and Sana was often guilty of wanting to read too much into the touch of fingers as moonshine cups were passed around, or Violet’s gentle ministrations as she checked an injury. She’d always told herself she was wishing for the impossible. She’s now starting to realise that might not have been true.

“What is it, Sana?” Arkady asks her, tense, like she’s readying herself for a fight. Sana weighs her options. She knows that telling Arkady about Ricky Q and his blackmail will only make her angry, and she doesn’t want to puncture the little cocoon of warmth and calm that they’ve created for themselves. But she also knows that putting her best friend off won’t be well-received. Arkady will probably make good on her promise to pin Sana to the bunk until she opens up about what’s going on (Sana carefully doesn’t think about all the ways that image appeals to her).

Even as she hesitates, Arkady says, “Look, you know all that touchy-feely crap you pull the moment one of us freaking blinks wrong? You know that goes both ways, right? You can’t just... It isn’t right for you to always have our backs, and not let us have yours, too.”

There’s frustration in Arkady’s voice, but there’s an underlying hurt, too, and a hesitancy. Arkady isn’t used to voicing her innermost feelings, Sana knows, and she’s always quick to retreat defensively afterwards, like she’s afraid of being mocked for it. But Sana thinks that Arkady is more afraid that Sana might not trust her with this. That she doesn’t see their friendship (more than friendship? a part of Sana’s mind wonders) as a partnership of equals. Sana lets out a soft breath, fighting down the urge to pull Arkady to her in a crushing hug, which might not be well-received.

“Before I tell you both what’s been going on,” she begins, “Kady, I need you to promise me that you won’t... fly off the handle.”

Arkady eyes her suspiciously. “That depends on what it is you’re about to tell us, because I already really don’t like the sound of this.”

Sana sighs. “Just, promise to hear me out first? I need you to do that for me.” She levels Arkady with her best Captain’s stare, a mixture of sternness and warmth. It works on the whole crew, but particularly Arkady, who will often back down only when Sana levels it at her.

Sure enough, Arkady grumbles but subsides, her cheeks going pink. “All right. Whatever it is, I’ll wait until after you’re done telling it before I blow a gasket.”

Smiling slightly, Sana looks at Violet, whose expression is intent and serious, before she begins.

“Last night, not long after I got done fixing the temperature reg, I had a call from Campbell...”

She outlines the tense exchange with Campbell, his assurances about Red Gregor, and then her accusation, the argument and Campbell’s parting words. True to her word, Arkady doesn’t interrupt, though she frowns indignantly on Sana’s behalf a couple of times. As expected, however, when Sana gets to the second caller and reveals his identity, she explodes.

“What?! What do you mean, Ricky Q? How did that rat bastard even get your number?”

Sana gives her an amused look, but it’s tired. “I told you you’d be angry.”

“Did he hack us? No, he can’t have done,” Arkady says. “Goddamn it, I should have known he’d crawl back up out of the gutter somewhere-”

“Arkady,” Violet says quietly but firmly. She reaches across Sana and takes Arkady’s hand. “Remember what you promised. Let Sana tell it.”

Sana bites back a smile as Arkady goes pink, looking down at their entwined hands as if she can’t quite parse what she’s seeing. “I- fine, whatever,” Arkady stutters.

Violet looks serenely back at Sana. “Carry on, Captain.”

Sana presses her lips together with amusement, and files away the way that Violet says ‘Captain’ to turn over in her brain later, because right now she can’t give it the attention it deserves.

“He talked to the Fowleys, that’s how,” Sana says in reply to Arkady’s question. Arkady’s expression darkens, and darkens further as Sana recaps the conversation and Ricky’s threats.

“That bastard,” she hisses, and this time neither Sana nor Violet stops her.

Violet looks upset. “He said that someone on this ship has been informing to a middleman... but we haven’t had contact with anyone...”

“He’s lying,” Arkady says instantly. “He’s making it up to bait you. Sana, you can’t meet him, you don’t know what he’s gonna do.”

“He knew about Violet,” Sana points out, her voice quiet. “He knew things he never could have found out unless he had some kind of… source. I don’t know what it is,” she goes on, before Arkady can say anything else. “And I don’t believe it’s any of you. But I have to know how he got the intel.”

There’s silence for a few moments as they all contemplate the situation. Sana hates that they’re in this bind, that they have to bow to the whims of someone like Ricky Q because they can’t risk the alternative. And she resents the loss of what could have been a quiet, peaceful morning with her two favourite people if not for this whole mess. (Oh, who is she kidding - the Rumor has never even met “quiet” and “peaceful”).

“I don’t think you should go in without backup,” Violet says quietly. Sana looks at her in surprise, and Arkady does a double-take.

“Hey, that's my line!” she exclaims, mock indignant, but she’s looking at Violet with warm admiration. A tingling sensation spreads through Sana’s gut, and she takes a moment to appreciate the way these shared looks between Violet and Arkady no longer make her feel a stab of jealousy and loneliness; instead, she feels overwhelming affection for both of them.

Still, she shakes her head. “I said I would meet Ricky alone, and I will. I can handle him.”

“Yeah, but you don’t have to,” Arkady points out, practically vibrating with frustration. “You can’t seriously believe he’s going to play fair with his one. You don’t know what shit he’s planning to pull. He could be waiting at the rendezvous with an army of IGR agents!”

Sana shakes her head again. “No. However much of a scumbag Ricky Q might be, he has more to fear from the IGR than we do. He won’t have tipped them off. Listen,” she goes on quickly, “I’m going into this to get information out of Ricky, so I need him to have his guard down. He won’t, if you’re there. And no offence, but I don’t think you could restrain yourself from stabbing him in the gut if you saw him again.”

Arkady shrugs. “Not really sure I see the downside there.” Violet gives a little snort of amusement. Sana smirks slightly, but then becomes serious again.

“I know you’re worried,” Sana says gently. “But I’m still the Captain, and if Ricky is making threats against all of you, I can’t let that lie. It’s my job to make sure you’re all safe. And to make life a living, breathing hell for whoever dares to cross us.”

Arkady smirks and stretches languidly. “I love it when you talk scary,” she jokes, though there’s a spark of heat in her eyes that makes Sana think she’s not entirely joking.

Sana smiles and reaches for Arkady’s hand, lying on the bunk next to her, and twines their fingers together. She does the same with Violet’s hand on her other side. For all that the situation with Ricky Q is a mess, and it could go sideways on them in the worst way possible, she feels calmer than she has done in a while. And her headache has miraculously faded.

“So...” she says. “Is this the part where we talk about... this?”

She feels Arkady go tense, as she’s prone to doing whenever feelings enter the conversation, but to her credit, she doesn’t pull away. Violet is nodding.

“I think... maybe we should? Arkady and I... well, we kind of talked about how we wanted to uh...” Violet blushes bright pink, but forges on, “take care of you, because you always do it for us, and both of us... care a lot about you, and we wanted to show it. That’s why we came to your room, last night. Well, this morning, I guess. I’m not even sure what time it is.”

“I was wondering that, too,” Sana admits. “And speaking of which, I haven’t even thanked you both for-”

Arkady groans and buries her face in the bunk’s one pillow, which she has somehow managed to steal. “Oh my god, can we please skip the speech? You really don’t need to thank us for that. At all.”

Sana knows from years of experience that Arkady’s protesting is her way of saying ‘you’re welcome’, so she isn’t affronted. She shoves Arkady lightly on the shoulder. “It wasn’t going to be a speech. I just wanted to say thank you. That’s all.”

Arkady makes an inarticulate noise of disbelief, and Violet grins.

“And, so that we’re all on the same page about this...” Sana begins, feeling like the ball is in her court now. She’s suddenly unaccountably nervous. They spent the night in the same bed, and Violet has just said that she and Arkady “care a lot” about Sana and wanted to show it, which is pretty hard to misinterpret. But Sana also hasn’t felt about anyone the way she feels about Arkady and Violet. And living as they do in such close quarters, she can’t afford to get this wrong.

“Sana?” Arkady prompts her, and the note of nervousness in her voice is enough to spur Sana on.

“I care a lot about both of you too, and have done for some time,” she says, feeling her face warm with a blush. “As more than just friends,” she adds, to be absolutely clear. “I don’t really know how… dating… will work on the ship, especially not with everything else that’s happening right now - but if you’re willing to give it a try, then so am I.”

Violet nods vigorously. “Yes. I would really like that,” she says, with a heart-melting soft smile. “And, well, Brian and Krejjh seem to manage somehow, so we can probably make it work, too.”

She says it with a grin in her voice, and Sana knows she’s saying it at least partly for the inevitable reaction it will provoke from Arkady when she emphatically declares that their relationship is in no way going to be like Jeeter and Krejjh. There’s a pause as both she and Violet wait for that reaction, but weirdly, it doesn’t come. Sana looks round at Arkady, who is red-faced and fidgeting with the pillow cover.

“So, uh, Krejjh might... know about the three of us already. At least, they know that I have feelings for both of you.”

“Really? How?” Sana asks, and from the surprise on Violet’s face, she can tell this is news to her, too.

“They sorta... gave me a pep talk. Last night. Just before I ran into you in the kitchen,” Arkady adds to Violet.

Violet’s eyes widen. “I wondered what that announcement over the comms was about.”

Sana senses she might have missed quite a bit while she was dealing with the double crisis of Campbell and Ricky Q. She makes a mental note to ask for the full story later. “So, let me get this straight,” she says slowly, because she is absolutely not passing up the opportunity to rib Arkady about this. A lot.

“You took romantic advice from Krejjh? The same Krejjh who kept inviting us to dinner with Brian when he was trying to ask them out? That Krejjh?”

“Well, it worked, didn’t it?” Arkady shoots back, still red in the face. “Anyway, it wasn’t really advice, it was more like... encouragement. They suggested that you guys might be open to the possibility of a relationship involving... all three of us. And something about Dwarnian relationship norms. Apparently polyamorous relationships are pretty normal for them.”

“Huh,” says Violet, contemplatively. “So I guess it’s Krejjh we should be thanking, then.”

Sana smirks at Arkady. “You realise that Krejjh is going to be insufferable about this as soon as they realise we’re together.”

Arkady groans again and faceplants back into the pillow. “Don’t remind me.”

(Sure enough, when the three of them enter the kitchen in search of breakfast - well, lunch technically - about half an hour later, Krejjh’s squeal nearly ruptures their eardrums. “Crewman Jeeter, come look! They’re holding hands!”

“We can hear you,” Arkady complains, half-heartedly.) 

[reconditarmonia]

Dear Trick or Treat Author

Hi! Thank you for writing for me! I’m reconditarmonia here and on AO3 (and have been since LJ days, but my LJ is locked down and I only have a DW to see locked things). I have anon messaging off, but mods should be able to contact me if you have any questions.

Far From the Madding Crowd | Simoun | Spinning Silver | The Strange Case of Starship Iris

General likes:

– Relationships that aren’t built on romance or attraction. They can be romantic or sexual as well, but my favorite ships are all ones where it would still be interesting or compelling if the romantic component never materialized.

– Loyalty kink! Trust, affectionate or loving use of titles, gestures of loyalty, replacing one’s situational or ethical judgment with someone else’s, risking oneself (physically or otherwise) for someone else, not doing so on their orders. Can be commander-subordinate or comrades-in-arms.

– Heists, or other stories where there’s a lot of planning and then we see how the plan goes.

– Femslash, complicated or intense relationships between women, and female-centric gen. Women doing “male” stuff (possibly while crossdressing).

– Stories whose emotional climax or resolution isn’t the sex scene, if there is one.

– Uniforms/costumes/clothing.

– Stories, history, and performance. What gets told and how, what doesn’t get told or written down, behavior in a society where everyone’s consuming media and aware of its tropes, how people create their personas and script their own lines.

Smut Likes: clothing, uniforms, sexual tension, breasts, cunnilingus, grinding, informal d/s elements, intensity; stories whose resolution isn’t the sex scene.

General DNW: rape/dubcon, torture, other creative gore; unrequested AUs, including “same setting, different rules” AUs such as soulmates/soulbonds; PWP; food sex; embarrassment; focus on pregnancy; Christmas/Christian themes; focus on unrequested canon or non-canon ships.

—

Fandom: Far From the Madding Crowd

Character(s): Bathsheba Everdene

One thing that always sticks in my mind about this novel is the way Hardy calls Bathsheba “the young farmer” just as he refers to the men as farmers - which, just saying, is more than most people writing about this story can do - and so, that being the case, what I’m most interested in is something about Bathsheba as farmer. One day in the life or four seasons in the life or five plantings/harvests in the life, or pseudo-academic fic about a case study of a woman farmer in the Victorian era, or a conflict between the farm and nature that Bathsheba has to decide how to solve.

Feel free to bring in other characters if it suits what you’re trying to do, but what I’m really looking for is a focus on Bathsheba’s work, determination, and process of learning. (I like how Bathsheba's relationship with Gabriel ends up playing out in canon, but I don't want shipfic.) Other ideas: something like a merchant ship AU (as the first alternate setting that came to mind where it would be not exactly the done thing for her to captain her inherited ship and make commercial decisions herself - although I do have to point out that contrary to popular belief, there were a lot of women on shipboard in the age of sail, may this be useful - but also where nature and luck/fate are as influential as they are in the original setting), or something in which the land, superstition, and ritual are more overtly magical.

I've only requested treats for this fandom, so I would prefer that the outlook of the fic, including if you decide to incorporate non-canon magical or spooky elements, be ultimately positive. A seasonal treat would be right up the alley of this request. I'd also be into interactive fiction.

—

Fandom: Simoun

Character(s): Neviril, Paraietta, Mamiina, Rodoreamon, Yun, Dominuura

This is a perennial request for me and anything would make me very happy. I'm so interested in how the war changes all the characters and their relationships with one another, how Everything is Beautiful and Then Shit Gets Real but amidst the war-is-hell there's still the creation of bonds of trust and loyalty and chances to do what's right (the bits with the Plumbish priestesses, for instance). Every character gets a chance to develop and make choices that are all brave in different ways. Would also be curious about post-canon (what happens if Neviril and Aeru make it back to the main world when war is brewing again, but Neviril has no one from the old cohort to lead because they can’t fly anymore?) and/or about magic and time weirdness retconning character deaths or disappearances.

I've requested either tricks or treats here. For tricks I'd prefer "dark" to "cynical" - throw as much shit at them as you want in terms of war-is-hell and weird magic and time horror, but I believe that the characters mostly want to do what they believe is the right thing and help each other. My treat preferences are, I think, more about thematic focus than content - if it's slice of life, how is that life striving towards their ideals even in small ways? (Helping the war orphans, flying the Simoun, growing a garden?) If it's more about Things Happening, in the war or whatnot, what do those things show about their growth or the changes in their relationships? I would also be super into interactive fiction.

As far as ships go, I'm on board with most of the canon ones (no romantic/sexual Dominuura/Limone, please) but have a small soft spot for postcanon Paraietta/Rodoreamon as well.

—

Fandom: Spinning Silver

Character(s): Miryem Mandelstam

I love hard-headed, practical, ambitious women who get into adventures because of, rather than in spite of, those qualities, and so I love Miryem and her good sense, pride, and rules-lawyering. I’m really interested in what the book does with power - Miryem’s real-world power of accounting and hardheadedness becoming magic in the Staryk world, being a queen in one world while belonging to a disenfranchised minority in another. What happens when Miryem is back in the human world, post-canon? I never got the impression that she’d be happy just avoiding the whole question of the town’s contempt for her by finding power elsewhere - what’s it like if she comes back a queen? (Can she use the mirror from Irina to do an end run around the whole Persephone setup and travel back and forth whenever she wants, and if so, what sorts of plot would make that fun to play with? If not, that’s still fine.) Or, what are some adventures in the Staryk world where she could use her Accounting Powers, other than the post-war rebuilding the book talks about? Or tell me more about Miryem practicing Judaism in the Staryk world, and the application of Judaism to that world and those customs that we get some hints of (that’s a hell of a diaspora - what would the rabbis think of it?).

I'm very uninterested in Miryem's romance with the Staryk Lord unless you feel like making it f/f, so while I don't require you to retcon it or break them up, I don't want a fic focusing on it. If you're interested in shipping her with Irina or Wanda, I have some previous prompts for them in my "dear author letters" tag. (These may also be relevant to platonic fic that includes Irina or Wanda - like Wanda becoming a magical gatekeeper to Miryem's land or having the "magic" of reading/writing that Miryem gave her become magic-magic in the Staryk land, or Irina and Miryem's different ideas of who their commitment as queen is to - but there's more detail and prompts in the tag.)

I'm happy to receive either tricks or treats for this fandom. I'm explicitly okay with a story in either category involving anti-Semitic prejudice, but would prefer that the dark/scary elements in a "trick" fic come from supernatural horror rather than the human capacity for racist violence. I suppose treat fic would be about finding or making one's place in the world, the place where you can use the powers that you've got and make your world safe for yourself and others around you.

—

Fandom: The Strange Case of Starship Iris

Character(s): Sana Tripathi, Arkady Patel, Krejjh, Brian Jeeter, Rumor Crew, Agent Park

I just want MORE of any or all of these people because I love them - Krejjh's dashing pilot thing ("feast on my leavings, mortality! I am danger on wheels and those wheels are rooOOOOLLING!") and what it masks, Brian's geekery and humanist passion, Arkady's tough outside and squishy center and Sana's soft outside and iron center, the crew-as-found-family, Park's fifth-cup-of-cold-coffee burnout and wry edge. Slice of life? Their backstories? Things they like or get excited about? (More about the music they like to listen to/sing/play!) Arkady and/or Sana (or other crew members) on missions off-ship, or the crew all facing a problem or a heist together? Dwarnian customs (and Krejjh introducing Dwarnian customs to their friends and how they maybe pick some of those up - or adopting human customs and how they're different)? Park adjusting to the crew and them adjusting to him (and what's his role going forward)?

I've requested treats only for this fandom, no tricks - I'm totally fine with characters' angsty pasts and angsty present feelings being included, but I'd prefer that the overall mood of a fic that involved angst be one that focused on a better future, bonds with others, a cause to believe in, etc.

I ship Arkady with Sana (that loyalty kink!), but I don't mind if a fic includes Violet/Arkady (after all, it is canon) as long as it's not shipfic/focused on their romance. Brian/Krejjh is good too.

[loumauve]

some starship iris thoughts

In another couple of months, she might have friends again. [x]

I can’t tell you how much my heart hurts for young Violet. (also for older Violet pre coming into contact with the Rumor crew)

I’m sure we’ll learn more about her history in time, but so far my takeaway is that she’s been feeling lonely for a long time. unable to make the connections she longs for, unable to find people who are as interested in getting to know her as she is in getting to know them. work (and life) on the Iris was isolating, as she told Brian when they talked about Alvy and how he was the only one to make an effort to be friendly with her. and just.. imagine that. you’re stuck out there in a metal bucket which.. sure, it’s a fancy metal bucket but still, and there is nothing but empty space around you, and the few people you could connect with don’t care to. just imagine that loneliness.

and to know that it started long before she ever got on board.. to know how she’s felt like she was never going to measure up (to the other Violet Liu, to her own aspirations) to know that she feels like she’s not smart enough or tall enough or too neurotic.. it just breaks my heart. 

and I feel like Arkady and Violet are more alike in that way than they possibly realise. Arkady with her background and her hang-ups about only having an eights-grade education, and about the things she has done and continues to do even though she doesn’t like having to hurt people. I just want them to get to a point where they can accept that they are doing their best to be the best possible version of themselves, and to a point where they learn to communicate and to accept their self-worth, but I’m sure it will be a long time before either of those things happen. (we all know mental health is something that takes a lot of time and effort, and with everything else that’s going on, I’m afraid they don’t have a lot of time or energy to spare. but one day. hopefully.)

but.. and here comes my crappy headcanon about Violet and her home life.. which has no basis whatsoever, and I might be missing snippets of information already canonly publicised bc my brain is crap at retaining information..:

I feel like Violet’s mum or dad (or mums/dads/parents of indetermined gender?? there was definitely a moment when she was thinking about how her family was feeling about thinking she was dead and not knowing she was actually still alive in one of the episodes but the details are escaping me right now) probably were hard-working, kind people; people who would have taught her to always be kind, show humility, always do her best and that the right people would accept her for all of who she is. now, we know that we can hear all this and still feel anxious and have doubts and feel like we’re never going to be good enough. and being an anxious and possibly fretful, painfully shy kid.. life is hard that way. but I think her parents did the best they could to make sure she always had a safe place to come home to.

now.. we know that she moved away from home somewhere before middle school (excuse me for not having the slightest clue of how education works in the US or other parts of the world. it confuses me to no end when there are no simple grades that go from 1 to whatever.. sorry. also possibly part of bilingualists problems??) but I’m unsure about whether or not she moved with her family, or if she had to move on her own to some kind of boarding school - again, I’m sure we’ll learn more about the education system under the IGR in time. but at whichever point she separated from her family and went to live by herself, I feel like her parents would have made sure she never forgot she had people and a place where she was loved.

so.. all that build-up just to throw this tiny little thing into the room - I feel like Violet probably has a patch somewhere that one of her parents gave her that’s some piece of embroidery of violets that they made so she could pin it on whatever she was made to wear, be it school uniforms or uniforms that I imagine the IGR would happily stuff their researchers, and therefore the Iris crew, into. and it’s also my headcanon that when they went to retrieve her stuff and loot The Iris after Violet was onboard The Rumor that’s possibly how they knew which pile of stuff was hers. (or maybe it was just really obvious bc she is pretty tiny and most of the crew was tall people. I don’t know. just.. I like the thought of her having sth personal with her at all times. like.. who even knows. maybe she still had a plushie of some sort left over from her childhood. maybe it was all very soft, very comfy sweaters and thick socks and a home made patchwork blanket. I NEED TO KNOW IF THERE WERE STILL SHEEP ON EARTH WHEN SHE LEFT)

aaaanyway, let’s stop the rambling thoughts there.

PS: even more so than Violet and Arkady, I ship both of them with therapy and softness and gentle care and a ton of healthy communication. also naps. definitely naps. all of the Rumor crew (plus Junior Agent, I forget her name) x naps

[swiftwyll]

“Look, you have a lot of questions right now. You can die with answers to none of them, or you can-” 

“Step into the goddamn unknown?”

“And reach for a little understanding.”

[jaggedwolf]

Tagged by @walkthegale - thanks!

your name: jaggedwolf is what I go by around these parts. I came up with it because wolves are my favorite animal and jagged seemed like a cool enough modifier.

fandoms you write for: uhhh, right now it’s been mostly The Strange Case of Starship Iris. (can’t stop won’t stop not sure how to stop, I say, as I look at my list of ficlets) Also, Critical Role!

where you post: AO3 for the things that actually get edited. Tumblr for the random ficlets my brain spits out.

most popular one-shot: For most hits and kudos, it’d be  i don't want to be a burden (please don't strain yourself on my behalf), which is a Wynonna Earp fic. Pretty sure the Waverly/Nicole tag is responsible for this, and I’m still divided on having tagged it as such. It’s about Nicole dealing with the consequences of Waverly’s deal with the Iron Witch, but Waverly does not appear at all. (....I might have convinced myself into changing the tag for a freeform one)

most popular multi chapter fic: I’ve never written a multi chapter fic, maybe by the end of the year! Depends on whether I die under a pile of exchanges.

favorite story you’ve written: Okay, don’t laugh, but it might be the Soulmate Goose of Engagement nonsense that is if that red string could bite (Violet/Arkady, TSCOSI). I think it’s funny and more tightly written than anything else I have up there. 

I have a soft spot for No Bold Moves (Violet/Arkady, TSCOSI), because I like having written 15k of fake-dating for undercover reasons, and there are very specific moments in it that I really like, that other people also seemed to like.

story you were nervous to post: Uh, definitely let my mouth taste like carrion, not yours (Sana/Arkady, TSCOSI) because 1. I hadn’t posted anything smutty in namespace before 2. I hadn’t written anything longer than a ficlet for the ship before 3. It was an exchange treat 4. It involved coming up with actual backstory details??

Thankfully exchange timelines meant I was inebriated and not looking at my computer at the time of reveals, so I was saved most of the nerves.

how do you choose titles: mostly riffs off lines from canon (i don’t want to be a burden, adrenaline makes you do stupid things, had some friends back in the day), or random words my brain throws at me (if that red string could bite, to restrain yourself is to already lose)

do you outline: mostly, no, with the exception being that fake dating fic in which I scrawled on three unusable-by-my-mistake large envelopes what would happen in every scene. I still have them lying around.

how many of your stories are complete? all the posted ones are

how many of your stories are in progress?   please don’t talk to me about my WIPs folder, sometimes I read them and hope the author updates soon

coming soon: Gonna sign up for Trick or Treat, so something’ll come of that. Also finally back to working on my torture funtimes CritRole fic now that I’m back in Beau and Jester feels, so crossing my fingers there.

do you accept prompts? Sometimes I reblog those prompt meme things, so at those times, yeah.

upcoming story you’re most excited to write? The aforementioned CritRole fic. I finally have ideas for it again since I’m caught up with the show, I might even be able to work it into the current timeline, who knows?

tagging: idk which of y’all are chill with/want to be tagged for this sort of thing, so knock yourself out with this meme if you so desire :) 

[jaggedwolf]

Voltron AU

"Ah, Patel-" Park starts as Arkady hops out of Black, his hand holding a tablet that's full of details she already knows. "Not now." She stalks past him, out of the hangar, making a beeline for the training room. Least likely place for the others to look. For not the first time, she's grateful for how far apart each lion's hangar is on this ship. Well. That mission was a fucking disaster. And sure, Sana would say it was her first run in Black, that she should give it another shot, a whole host of other well-meaning platitudes. The worse part is, it would have worked, bolstering Arkady against her better instincts.

But Sana isn't saying anything at all these days.

Arkady holsters the black bayard before slumping back on to a bench. In Arkady's hands, the bayard had turned into a small pistol. Useful. More efficient, deadlier, one might say, honed to a singular purpose.

It pales in comparison to the memory of the sturdy broadsword the bayard had been in Sana's hands - as likely to be used to strike as a foe as it was to pry a way open for civilians. Voltron really had gotten the measure of who each of them was, huh? Arkady scoffs at herself, at her self-indulgent thoughts, and then the door slides open. It's Violet. The bright green katar she's gripping makes for a jarring contrast against the blue paladin armor she's wearing. God does Arkady miss that bayard. "Arkady-" "The others pick you to chew me out first, Liu?" "I think you know that's not what I'm here for." Violet frowns, taking a step in. "Or what the others are thinking." "Bullshit. I messed up." Arkady should try to explain herself. Promise to do better. Sana would have. And it's that, that who knows what number time today of thinking "Sana would have" that makes stupid little tears spring from the corners of her eyes. Shit. "I miss her too." Violet's words are soft and cautious. "I know, out of the four of us, I have the least right to say that-" "No one gets a monopoly on grief." Arkady's voice is an ugly, choked-up mess despite her best efforts. "And that'd be a shitty excuse for me to make. She's not the first person I've lost." Violet doesn't say anything in response, simply comes closer and sits next to Arkady. Like she knows that if Violet lets her, Arkady'll keep running her mouth. Ass. "It shouldn't be me. It can't be me," Arkady ends up saying. "Who else could it be?" asks Violet. And this time when Arkady steals a glance at her, Violet looks as tired and as at much of a loss as Arkady feels. "Krejjh got Red. It'd make sense." It's a churlish thing to say. Arkady's long over that old sting of seeing the lion who was made to be the right-hand pass over her. Green's her girl. Green was her girl. "Being a good second while we're flying doesn't necessarily extend to anything more." Violet reminds her. "And let's be honest, Krejjh isn't the best at seeing the big picture." "And I am?" "You could be." Violet shifts closer. "It's going to take me some time to get used to Green, too." Arkady shakes her head. "You were fine out there. Hell, Liu, before all this you were a biologist - pretty sure the lion all about intellect and nature should've been yours in the first place." "No. She picked right the first time." Violet exhales sharply. "Green's a little terrifying to fly. I would not have dealt well with that." "What?" Terrifying is something Arkady's never associated with Green. Piloting Green is always being about to grasp something beyond your reach, finding another path when it seems every opening is cut off, a dozen annoying little questions prodding you. She’s breathtaking in her own right. "How?" "She shifts so easily - Blue was bulkier." Arkady feels Violet's hand rest on hers then, as she keeps talking. "But I think it'll feel right, eventually, me piloting her. How does the Black lion feel?" "Big. Bigger than it looks. Like it wants something from me I haven't given it yet but"-Arkady pauses, disentangling the memory of her own short flight from Sana's descriptions-"it doesn't feel like it's completely given up on me yet. Which is good, since it's already rejected anyone else we could have fly it." If it was only flying the damn lion she wouldn't be half as wary. It's that they've lost their leader, and with Black picking her,  the others are looking to her now. Which, honestly, is a pretty good sign of how screwed up everything is. Violet's hand squeezes tight. "We don't need you to be her. We just need you."

[jaggedwolf]

For the meme - please do the voyeurism fic?

Gladly! Ficlet is here.

Violet didn’t mean to lose track of the time. She’d curled up in the engine room with queue of research papers to go through, and suddenly it was hours later, her eyes burning from staring at a screen. Seemed her idea that no one was likely to disturb her in the hottest room on the ship had panned out.

Is anyone on this ship not a secret workaholic? I will say that now that I’m out of school, that is the one truly unrelatable thing about all of them. 

A thump echoed from outside the room.

Violet willed herself not to panic. All sorts of noises were perfectly normal to hear in the normal operation of a spaceship. She took a tentative step towards the door.

Remember that time I suggested the Rumor is to either Iris as the Millenium Falcon is to the Normandy SR2? I would like to propose another comparison noise-wise: NYC underground trains versus fancy modern trains in Singapore/Tokyo/etc. Bet that frankenship makes a lot of weird noises, and here Violet is definitely quoting something Sana told her.

Another thump, and then a gasp. Sana’s voice.

Wonder what was causing those thumps ;). I spent too long wondering whether a person could recognize someone from simply a gasp, and then gave up and decided Violet is such a detail-hoarder that this would be fine. 

Violet relaxed. Sana had probably tripped in the hallway. The Rumor’s floors were remarkably uneven in height - Violet had spent what felt like her first month here staring at the floor whenever she so much as left a room. One would think Sana, out of all them, would be least prone to clumsiness here, but given that Violet’s watch said it was way too weird a time for any of them to be up, Violet didn’t think she could begrudge her too much.

I miss the frankenship so much. That’s all. 

She walked up to the door, about to slide it open when Sana’s voice stopped her.

“Really? Only five more feet to my actual room,” Sana dryly remarked.

The idea of being caught making out in a public area of her own ship is Not Sana’s kink, thank you. Will be practical even as very distracting things are happening. 

Then another small gasp, and more noises and - oh. Those were definitely kissing noises and also moaning noises, the thin door between Violet and Sana filtering out almost no sound, except who the heck was Sana kissing.

What a good question, Violet, it’s not at all like a simple process of elimination would help you here. Sana’s back is definitely against the engine room door, by the way, so Violet is hearing...a lot. Months after writing this, I’m wondering why on earth I chose “heck”.

Violet was definitely on Sana’s side since she’d like to go to bed and they were right outside her only exit and also she could feel her face starting to flush red from the embarrassment of this entire situation.

You can take away my “Violet is an obvious blusher and she hates it” headcanon away from my dead hands. And yeah, the closest I could get Violet to this fic prompt was being trapped and forced to listen because 1. It’s funny 2. thirst is difficult to write well.

The noises stopped. 

“Technically, isn’t the entire ship kind of your room?” asked Arkady.

It is important to note that Arkady distracted Sana very thoroughly before delivering her snarky retort, which is a very good strategy. Also, I think the edge between Arkady’s paranoia and Arkady’s “well, what the fuck does it matter, take the risk” is a fun one to be on. (I hope it’s pretty clear this is not the first time these two have had this conversation, haha)

Huh. 

Violet’s first thought was that she doubted she’d ever get what an out-of-breath, thoroughly-kissed Arkady sounded like out of her mind, because wow. 

Violet lives as she was ready to die on the Iris, quietly horny. 

Her second thought was nothing more than stupid, unwarranted disappointment, a spiral her brain would’ve gladly jumped into if Sana and Arkady hadn’t decided to keep talking. Almost as if they were completely unaware Violet was hearing all of this.

“Sure, Kady,” Sana replied, the words so fond and soft that Violet felt a pang of guilt at hearing them.

Eavesdropping on emotional intimacy might be even more of a dagger to one’s heart than eavesdropping on physical intimacy, you know? I think, Violet correctly suspects that while Sana might easily say those two words in that exact same tone to Arkady in front of the rest of the crew, Arkady’s response is unlikely to fit that criteria. 

Violet backed away from the door as far as she could. No more audible noises or voices, now, though whether that meant they’d left or she was simply far enough away was unclear. It was fine. She’d stare at her research articles for another half hour and check if the coast was clear then.

So Violet makes sure she doesn’t hear it. 

Her eyes stared at the screen, processing nothing. God, of course, it made so much sense, the two of them together. Even more sense that they were hiding it - Arkady’s paranoia would make sure of that.

History and loyalty intertwined :D. Are they hiding it? Is it a defined relationship or is the physical stuff just another dimension to their relationship? I don’t know - I can easily see Arkady convinced that somehow, sleeping with Sana is very separate from her very intense “yeah dying in her place is the best thing I could do” feelings about her, and that Sana feels no great need for more clarity given the chaos of their lives. It’s working for them. And...

Violet shut down the continued feelings of disappointment. She’d thought that-that maybe her interest was reciprocated, that their dumb exchanges had meant something. Silly old Violet, always reading too much into things.

...it means I could keep this ficlet firmly in a world where all of Arkady and Violet’s interactions have exactly as they’ve been in canon. (Everyone else’s, too! Like. Do you think Sana wouldn’t tease Arkady about her obvious thing for Violet just bc she’s sleeping with Arkady? Nah, bro.)

I guess, personally, I don’t find romantic jealousy particularly interesting, especially the spiteful kind. More power to those who do but I find the sadness “Oh. What else would I have expected” much more appealing. Wallowing > lashing out/blaming other people. 

Somehow, she smiled. It was weirdly comforting to know that Arkady and Sana had found each in the chaos of their lives.

Violet tells Arkady that being on the Rumor is the safest she’s felt in a long while. From everything else she says, I have to assume it’s also the least lonely she’s felt in a long while. There was no chance of Violet being too morose about a crushed crush or being the fifth wheel - her life on this ship is already more than she ever thought she’d get. 

And hey, Violet can appreciate the nice story that established Arkady/Sana would make. 

Even if hearing them wasn’t the ideal way to find out.

Violet ignored the images her mind helpfully supplied at the thought, her cheeks still burning.

This is very much a pre-OT3 fic, because I’m a weenie who usually hates unrequited pining. Nope, none of that here, this definitely turns into being so on-purpose happy for your crush that you end up having a thing for their partner too.