#VIRTUAL HUGS JUST ARENT THE SAME

[turnthefrigginfr0gsgay]

i wanna give ella and ghosty and gremlin a hug but i cant bc they all live on like,, the other side of the world :ᗡ

@ellalily @totallynotagremlin @halfapersob

[heyyallitsbeth]

so i let the hyperfixation win.

over the past several hours i rewatched Sword Art Online and SAO 2.

(this time dubbed, last time i watched it subbed)

here are my thoughts:

-anyone who said the dub was bad is just wrong. Kirito's VA really shines in the more comedic or sweet moments (like when first meeting Yui), he reminds me of like a Peter Parker. and oh my lord, the breakdown by Suguha's VA was just a masterpiece. Still have chills from watching it.

-i have such a big appreciation for every character. This time it really shined through how good of characters Kirito, Asuna, and Suguha actually are.

Kirito's internal conflict throughout SAO2 is so good, grappling with their actions they needed to take in SAO to survive. and throughout all of it you can tell how much they truly loves their friends and family, and how kind hearted they really are. Asuna definitely fits into that role as well, being so ready to take care of Yui and so desperately wanting her to be safe and loved and cared for.

And oh my gosh Suguha. I remember people absolutely hated her arc because it is problematic, but the fact is, it's played entirely serious, her feelings arent taken as a joke. She has a genuine and real internal struggle for feeling things she feels she shouldnt, and how she feels those feelings arent reciprocated or cant be reciprocated, and having her heart broken twice by someone who she loves and someone who also does still genuinely love her. Its absolutely heartbreaking to watch.

Man, Sinon is still fantastic. She's still my absolute favorite, and I think she is one of the best characters in the show, and pretty much steals the show from her introduction. Her arc ties in so seamlessly with Kirito's and how they help eachother heal and grow is fantastic. Only complaint is we never got a scene of the rest of the Gals being jealous about the grenade hug she gave Kirito. After Kirito and Sinon nearly died, wouldve been some nice relief so you didnt feel like you yourself were dying.

-Speaking of, while there was definitely a ton of fanservice, the pseudo-harem aspect with the jokes were kinda cute, between characters seeing flirting happen around them, getting embarassed over it, its fun. Especially when people got jealous of Sinon flirting with Kirito over Excalibur. That part was very fun, since they did that infront of everyone else, almost like they were trying to get a rise out of them. Theyre not exactly the pinnacle of comedy, its definitely a trope, but theres something nostalgic about it that makes it kinda enjoyable.

-Speaking of the psuedo-harem, guys if all of you are constantly flirting with eachother (not just Kirito surprisingly, happens between the other girls frequently) and jealous of any affection with that, just start a polycule. You're a group of gamer girls playing MMOs together and all of you have slept in the same bed with eachother. Stop snipping at eachother and start dating eachother. Polyamory is pretty cool. Kirito and Asuna can still be the main duo and be the parents to Yui and Strea; but yall gotta work on the jealousy or just do what every other group of girl gamers does, polyamory. Lisbeth you should not be angrily drinking while watching Kirito and Asuna talk. (this is mostly a joke, im not actually saying they *have* to do a polycule, its more of a joke because of how tropey a lot of the flirting and jealousy is, and yknow, gay girls do polyamory, so dont take this part toooooo seriously.)

-Speaking of girls dating girls, the LGBT rep aint half bad. Argo canonically using both male and female pronouns is really cool! Most of the girls flirt with eachother a lot too, which is nice. Between the female avatar, the willingness to pretend to be a girl, the introversion, the desire to be an avatar in a virtual world more than irl, Kirito might be transgender. All good stuff here.

Overall, SAO is honestly way better than I remembered, even if some parts definitely show its age. You gotta piece it together a little bit with headcanons, but i do that with every show, nothing is perfect. Except Sinon. And a world where trans Kirito is canon. Those are perfect.

[smolmoss]

Introduction thingy!

hihi!! i go by Smol, Kirby, or Moss :) my pronouns are they/he or kit/purr! im really shy and have a hard time socializing so i might not post alot or use many words

heres my carrd! heres my commission carrd! discord servers where i save my emotes! (will update soon)

about my emotes!

i'll post emojis and do emote requests for fun sometimes!! (it may take me a while to get to requests/open requests, sorry abt that! it can be quite hard to find time and energy, since i have other things to do as well @w@"") what i will/wont do, and other info, under the 'keep reading' thingy!

-----

things i will do:

> nonverbal, semiverbal, mute, losing speech stuff

> neurodivergent things, such as stimming

> LGBTQIA+ and MOGAI things

> alterhuman, kin, nonhuman stuff

>age regression/little things

> anything related to my interests (u can see what those are in my carrd!)

>fictional characters (sometimes!)

-----

things i won't do

> anything nsfw

> anything homophobic, racist, and generally just mean

> or if i just dont wanna do the request or find it too hard to make into an emote

also!!!

> pls credit me when u use them, or at least dont pretend theyre yours!

> u can edit them, make emotes based off them, use them as a base, add them on moodboards, ect! but credit me as the base/inspo if u do!

>please Don't put any of my art into any AI art thing! No ai art, no nft, none of that stuff !!

> theyre created for discord, but u can use them in other places :> (rules for my non-emote art are more strict on crediting me, but mostly the same as emote rules for now!)

other stuff!

i mainly post emotes, but sometimes ill post non-emote art! non-emote art will most likely be of my interests, friends, and ocs :> or maybe ill do drawings similar to emotes but arent quite, like a hugging gif you can use to virtual hug someone, or something like that!

heres my reblog account! is not nessecary to look at or follow, just thought id offer if anyone would be interested :3

[actualbird]

Hello Zak!!! I hav been reading your TOT writings and hOLY COW, INCREDIBLE STUFF DUDE- I know virtually nothing abt these characters and yet I was hooked immediately! You made me lov these characters instantly w/o having played or seen any of the actual game. Keep up the amazing work!! But I hav also come to you today for a reason besides complimenting your stunning writing prowess. I am here to inform you abt how tall the NXX group /actually/ are. This very true and real facts may be contrary to popular belief, and idea canon itself, but I can assure you they come from a totally logically and reasonable place. My significantly lacking in TOT knowledge brain!!! And so, onto the facts: (messurements are in feet)

MC: 5’7”

Some might think that she’d be far more intimidating if she were taller. They are wrong. She will kick you in the shins and bite you ankles and you will not be able to retaliate. Many tall people hav under estimated her. They often end up on the floor.

Artem: 6’5”

On the other hand, people might think Artem is intimidatingly be around, due to his height. This is is also wrong. He’s always bending in on himself and bending over things in a a way that works against the intimidation factor of his sheer height. Except when he wants to be intimidating. Then he’s an extremely well postured menace.

Vyn: 6’2”

Vyn is the type of person who would act lik they’re tall even if they were short. His height is a non-concern to him, he says. He’s a lier though, because every time he’s in a picture w Artem, he’s standing on his tippy toes. He staunchly denies this fact.

Marius: 5’8”

He insists he’s not short. And honestly, he’s not, but it’s hard to look anything other than short around people like Artem and Vyn. He’s really glad he an inch taller than MC though. He has not stopped bringing that fact up, nor does he plan to.

Luke: 5’5”

He’s short of the bunch, but he doesn’t care. He fully understands the competition the other guys seem to hav going on, and he wants no part. Being short is actually really useful! He can get into vents, lurk in the shadows, and blend into a crowd much easier than say, Artem ever could. And maybe he likes being easily holdable. Sue him.

(Apologies, did not realize how long this got!!! Sorry abt that)

hi, kitkat :D

first off, thank you so much for reading my totstuff!!! and thank you for your kind words wahhhhh. always a huge compliment in my eyes if im able to hook readers who know close to nothing about the source text, haha.

second off, THESE ARE HILARIOUS HEIGHTS YOUVE SENT ME. hilarious in all senses: the fact you assigned heights by vibes, the fact you detail character traits in relation to those vibes, and the fact you said with your whole heart---

---that 5'5" IS SHORT......

im 5'1". please know that this whole ask was SURREAL FOR ME TO READ. i genuinely did not know it was even POSSIBLE to be 6 foot 5 inches tall, like what the fuck, that is a giant, ur messing with me arent you, you HAVE TO BE JKFBGJFDGF

that aside, i do love this a lot. huge agree that artem gives off gentle giant vibes but also SO AWKWARDLY and vyn trying to make it seem like he and artem are the same height is the funniest fucking thing skgbdgjsdg. mc is not afraid to go for the kneecaps and marius Will use that extra inch he has on her to hook his chin over mc's shoulder during from-the-back hugs

AND HONESTLY, BEFORE I KNEW CANON HEIGHTS, I GENUINELY THOUGHT LUKE WAS THE SHORTEST OF THEM ALL

HE GIVES OFF SHORT KING VIBES!!!!! HE IS CAPABLE OF VENTING LIKE IN AMOGUS!!! AND HE IS HOLDABLE!!!!!

fantastic ask youve sent me, im not going to believe people can grow to be 6'5" though, thats gotta be lie.

and just in case ur curious, heres the actual (at least for the boys, mc doesnt have a canon measurement) heights HAHA

(made by gyuppii on twitter)

(EDIT: 180cm is 5'10" not 5'9" but artem has still got those extra 2 centimeters on luke hehe)

[delta-airlines-with-osdd]

your crew here at alaska airlines!

host/pilot:

maeko

they/them

kind of a bitch LOL – also probably fronting rn

gatekeepers(ig):

bear

he/him

fucking amazing the whole system(except for saionji!! that bitch) loves him. also a protector(physical to be exact).

teeko

thee/thou

kinda spells weird but thee is vv nice :}

no real role they just help out so others arent stressed:

crim

bunch o neopronouns that i don't remember ask them- and they/them :}

super social!! talk to them if they're fronting please they'd love it!!

kenji

they/he

call him ken or kenj and they're PUTTY. he's super confident too lol

exodus

it/its

a (mental) protector but im too lazy to make another section for em. pretty cool but acts a bit odd sometimes.

fictives

ouma

they/she/him

does doodles a lot n love attention. also likes to pretend they aren't fronting.

nanami

they/she/pxxel

usually fronts in the morning, or when we start schoolwork.

emma

she/her

really really nice!! normally just cofronts

saionji

gum/gummy/gummi/gummies/gummyself or she/her

bitchy..please don't be offended by gummy gum doesn't actually hate you<3 n please no doubles!! they make gummy feel invalid n fake. gum also gets mildly triggered by heavy romance. please tag anything with either of those as "nyanji don't look". will also tag posts with "saionji loves bullyism" when she needs to get anger out and bully something.

taeko/celeste

they/them

also a protector(sexual to be exact). normally confronts with littles. your local mom<3

tsukasa

te/tea/tease/teases/teaseself

bitch!!!!! loves playfully teasing. also a ghost!!

toujou

they/it..we think-

idk they were formed very recently

kotoko

literally NO clue

also dunno formed not too long ago

Tsumiki

she/they

same as above vv new

littles

dakota

they/them

10, scared of melatonin, fruit snacks, lullabies and women in their 30s. tag anything like those with "zota don't look"

Kauri

she/her

7, loves the :3 face

GJ

any

sensitive, cries a lot, dni if fronting w/o protector!!

non-humans

sama-san (monster/alien thingy..)

any pronouns

please no nicknames!! also learning how to read and write. be nice.

viole(monster)

any pronouns too

please nicknames!! she loves em, and hugs. and over virtual hugs.

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

tw/venting

ayo the thought of having to go back to school in a little over a month is fucking wild. like.....i feel like i just got out of school and binge watched invincible for the first time. IT FEELS LIKE YESTERDAY. it’s extremely scary thinking about how fast time is passing by because i keep doing the same thing everyday. there’s barely any change in anything. not allowed outside. my IRL friends arent vaxxed yet, and even if they were, my mom’s suspicious of my intentions when going out. and lets not get into the fact that school doesnt stress me out as much, but i’ll be damned if i dont have awful test anxiety still. i feel like everything is fucking passing me by and that sucks ASS. my classmates are going out to beaches and shit, and posting on insta (good for them, i probably need to touch some grass) but like?? i feel like im just being robbed of my life. and teen years and all that. 

i know the pandemic has been hard for LITERALLY everyone. (if you said 2020 was a good year, hush, you’re alone in that regard bestie, dont wanna hear it) but i just......im finally recognizing feelings and all that (shit’s scary man) my thoughts dont match my body whatsoever (not dysphoria, its derealization, or something similar). thats so scary to me. sometimes i catch myself in the mirror and im talking and im like...”thats not me.....oh fuck, it is me.” so i dont look in the mirror and talk aloud, is what im saying. i’ll have a breakdown. but im extremely extroverted. i love people, and seeing people and hugging people. and not feeling like every day that i spend inside of my fucking house is a waste of time because time travel doesnt exist and i cant get any of these days back. at all. it is a never ending cycle. i just want a hug, dude. i’ve never experienced cuddling before either. i would love to platonically cuddle someone. but i got rid of toxic friends (still not over it) and got very radicalized...but for what. my own knowledge and betterment.....but eh. plus i traumadump, nobody wants to hear my sob story, i need to hush. and get in contact with my therapist. and discuss my anxiety issues. and possible depression. and PTSD and so many other things because it’s really not cute. anyways.

also heyy, my body issues are back. like?? hello. not that they ever went away, they just steep for a bit, then start boiling back. and that’s torture for me. having a generally okay body is fine, but then i realize that when i do wear pants, they’re either my overalls (comfort and queerness) or jeans. and yay those are tighter than they were last time. and i know weight fluctuation is a thing that happens, but i really feel like i could do more to not feel as bad. (i mean, sure, i could, but exercising makes me feel horrible mentally so). i see classmates thin and everything (i know thin isnt always healthy, but a part of me wishes that i was bone thin, we wont talk about it) and i know “every body is a bikini body” and i support that initiative 1,000 percent, but A. i have no idea if my parents would even let me get one if i wanted one (i dont) and B. i dont have the confidence to wear something like that. i even hate the fucking swimsuit that i have. i want the fucking full length victorian swimsuits with a shirt and fucking shorts because i cant stand being exposed. my stomach pokes out too much. my arms arent muscly like they were some years back. i just feel....so weird. and the “oh she’s smart, she cant be hot.” one or the other type shit that my brain keeps trying to tell me is real ia NASTY. like heyyy i have a brain, and i use it most days, but my body also shouldnt be fuckshitted like this. this collection of skin and bones keeps me safe (but not from my brain, its on some different shit)

another thing is that i can not wear exposing things. ugh, i would feel so just....out in the open. im literally scared of someone coming behind me and fucking groping me, or slapping my ass. (valid fear) but i literally fucking HATE feeling like that. one, I AM UNDERAGED, and two, ITS NASTY EITHER WAY. and if i went to school, and wore something mildly form fitting, i’d be pushing my body forward to look less noticeable (i dont trust seniors), or pulling my jacket down (i always wear jackets in school) so people arent looking at me. that sucks. and i wish i didnt make my anxiety that bad as to where it just sucks to exist. with a human flesh prison that looks a certain way. i kinda just want to hide my body. permanently. (not dysphoria related, my tits are fine, if they stay, cool, if they don’t, cool) but like...ugh.

and this is where it gets EXTREMELY dark, trigger warning for suicide mention.

yeah last year on the first week of school (virtual) i really wanted to kill myself. which like..isnt okay. i havent really told anyone about that either. because it was an extremely low point for me. i just didn’t think that i could fucking make it through the entire year. all those assignments, and all those days, wasted. im not learning anything valuable (besides maybe science and finance)...i dont know what the fuck i want to do with my life. there’s no such thing as ethical consumption so i’m gonna be contributing to something fucked up, no matter what i do. im weird. and political. and opinionated. and into so many different things. which, y’know, should be cool and fun and fresh. but it terrifies me to know that other people arent like me. that they many never understand my interests. and i feel like this with EVERYONE in EVERY class. unless i see a similar interest. or a tiny flag. but the thought of introducing myself again and again. to more people. who i may never fucking see again. who probably dont care about me. kinda discourages you a bit. so yeah, i really wanted to off myself. it seemed so impossible to get through everything. and then heyyy, near the end of the year, something really shitty happened. was depressed. told my mom i may be autistic... “okay...well....getting diagnoses takes a lot of money. so unless you have 700 bucks laying around....then no.” (who says the person who may ALSO be autistic along with me) few weeks back, talking about my therapist who wanted to talk through the DSM-4 with me “you really think you’re autistic huh.” of course mom. why else would i have written a paper about it, followed actually autistic accounts, and done research on it.

then near the next year, i sucked even more ass. friend shit broke me down and i felt....like i fucked up. which i did. and like i cant keep people in my life. (which is partially true) and i felt more physically exhausted than i had in literal years. i feel very deeply, and especially with negative emotions. so that really fucked me up. (may be something more serious, i have no idea) so there’s that. i just....i’ve never felt like i had been so awful in some time. like i let everyone around me down. so no more of /those/ situations. i dont sleep correctly when my hair is wet, so you can imagine how my dreams were THAT night.

but yeah, i dont feel like wanting to kill myself again. because i know it’s not worth it. but something just keeps pulling me deeper into these disgusting pits of awfulness. like there’s no other way out. (wrong) and gritting my teeth and willing myself to do things is going to hurt, but it’s quite literally the only choice i have. i cant give up. so there’s that. my thoughts and everything. yeah.....it’s 5:10 in the morning, im going the fuck to sleep.

[madisonrooney]

hi it's your secret santa! first of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! i hope you have a wonderful day! how are you celebrating, if you are at all? safely, i hope! either way i hope you manage to find a way to have a great day full of love!! consider my christmas gift a belated birthday gift as well lol. anyway i loved reading your last answer, it was so thoughtful and sweet. i realized after reading that i barely know anything about dove lol so follow up q: what about dove makes you love her so much?

sorry for the late response! the last couple days have been v busy and ive been super tired and dissociative on top of it so i made a point to save this bc i wanted to give it my full attention!

first of all thank you!! i was going to do a virtual meet and greet with one of my favs from jersey boys but he got confused about timezones so we rescheduled but were doing it next week! then i went to a virtual walt disney family museum panel, had pizza for dinner and watched some liv and maddie, my mom made a cookie cake that we ate while watching the grinch musical, and then some friends and i watched the jersey boys movie together over skype!

im so glad you enjoyed reading my last answer! and oof thats another loaded question (i love it tho)

- like i said when first talking about what drew me to her and liv and maddie, a big thing is just how much passion and love she puts into her characters. ofc she puts passion into every character she plays, but its the passion she puts into characters like liv, maddie, and mal that means the most to me. that goes back to the fact that ive dealt with a lot of negativity directed towards me for enjoying disney channel, and then you have dove out here saying “yah im a teenager/twenty-something who not only respects what theyre doing on disney channel, but puts my all into it” not to mention she even won an emmy for playing liv and maddie in season 4! i hope that passion and talent has started to change the conversation about disney channel, and tbh i think it has at least a bit.  ofc, none of this is to say other people her age acting on disney channel arent talented and passionate, but idk, something about her has always stood out to me. i find her to be more animated and expressive than most. it can be hard for me to read emotions in live action movies and shows, so thats been really important for me. not to mention she was not only playing the lead but TWO lead characters on a four season show with distinct personalities but also subtle similarities. AND the main character in the biggest DCOM franchise in years for 5 years running now. PLUS the fact that there was a period where those were both happening at the same time. she was only 16 when she started all this and hadnt even had any big roles prior to it!! she had a lot of responsibility so it was amazing to see her not only pull it off, but excel at it.

- i just love like....her aesthetic?? shes always seemed to be a very old soul to me, into old jazz music and poetry and stuff like that. its just very charming. and for her to have that aesthetic on top of being a disney channel actress is a fascinating juxtaposition.

- this is kind of sappy and it gets tiring to hear it said over and over again but that doesnt mean it isnt true: i love how transparent she is about her struggles with mental health issues, trauma, and such. she has been for a long time but even more so over the last year or two. no shade to anyone else, but a lot of actors dont really give you a look into their personal lives, they just share and promote their product. im not saying theres anything wrong with that, its good to know what youre comfortable sharing, ive just felt all the more close to her with her being as open as she is, especially as someone who has gone through trauma myself, albeit different from hers.

- kind of connected to that, i love how important spreading kindness, positivity, and love is to her. thats another thing thats been said a million times but still, its very important to me.

for example. she’ll randomly tweet things like “i love you” a lot. im one to always think of the thought process that goes on behind whatever someone posts, texts, etc., bc personally i put a lot of a thought into pretty much anything i say or do before i put it out there publicly, probably bc of my social anxiety. even tho its a simple statement and takes her a couple seconds to post, she still had to have the thought “i want to remind my fans that theyre loved” or something along those lines. and she has this thought FREQUENTLY. to just randomly get a notification every few days or weeks or so of her saying something like that is just very heartwarming to me.

the reason i connected with miley so much when she helped me through my initial trauma was bc it felt like even if no one loved me, she loves her fans, thus she loves me. thus the person i love and admire the most loves me. even if its only one person, it can be enough. it was for me at the time. i feel that same way with dove. when she came into my life, i didn’t feel as unloved, but her love was still helpful to me.

- of course i need to specifically talk about her kindness in person too. dont get me wrong (ive been saying that a lot havent i lol), i totally and completely loved her long before i met her, but naturally, i love her 10x more after the experiences ive had getting to know her in person.

i could go ONNNNNNN about the experiences ive had with her, and i have lol, and if you already heard me ramble about this in the server i apologize, but the most important thing ive taken away from every encounter ive had with her is this: she always goes the extra mile. she always goes out of her way to make people feel special. what i mean by that is she could say/do HALF as much as she has when meeting me and i would still leave over the moon feeling loved. you can tell she does this in excess bc she really truly means it and cares about people like me, she doesnt have any kind of ulterior motive and isnt just going through the motions doing whats asked of her, she simply cares about me and the rest of her fans. some examples - the first time we met, i was sobbing (lol) and she hugged me for a really long time, rocking me back and forth, brushing my hair with her thumb, calling me sweetheart and honey. she even started to tear up a bit herself. - a couple months later, i went to my first liv and maddie taping. i was preparing to reintroduce myself (i looked a little different bc id been cosplaying as maddie the first time i met her) and ofc when preparing myself, i fantasized pretty heavily as i usually do and pictured myself showing her the pic of us on my phone, her gasping, jumping out of her chair screaming, and hugging me, thinking that was probably way more than i was gonna get. that is EXACTLY what happened. then she went on to tell me how my costume made her whole weekend. things like this would continue to happen where i would set the bar impossibly high and not only would she meet it but she’d exceed it. - our usual interaction from there on would start with her face lighting up when she saw me, her calling me some kind of cute name like love or baby, and then hugging me without me even having to initiate it. - when i saw her in mamma mia, i didnt know when id be seeing her again afterwards after pretty consistently getting to see her for 2 years, so i wanted to make sure we got some kind of closure. at the stage door, i reminded her how much she meant to me and just expected like an “aww i love you too” or something back, but she said “you are an angel in my life” and i will never forget that. obvs, i havent told her ALL the details about what she and her characters mean to me but like...she can tell. she can tell if im in a homemade maddie costume sobbing into her arms that theres something there, and shes VERY appreciative of that. - i thankfully got to see her at a meet and greet a few months later and every time i thought i should get going cuz i didnt want to hold the line up, she would just open her arms for another hug. speaking of being appreciative, she even said “thank you for being such a supportive fan.” as i left, i turned around to say one last goodbye. i made sure she wasnt with the next fan yet and yelled out “bye!” and she yelled back “I LOVE YOU!!” and blew me a kiss. again, its the little things. - i saw her at a small panel in new york a few months after that. she walked in the room when the lights were down as they were playing a clip, she quietly waved hi to everyone, then saw me and loudly whispered HI BABY!!! and stopped on her way to the stage to give me a hug. (then she looked at me from the stage and asked which way i thought she should cross her legs for the interview lol) - sometimes when she sees im next in line, shell give me a knowing smile or whisper “hi baby!!” or something like that. she saw me in the crowd after clueless and seemed to make a point to come to me last bc she knew wed be talking for a while, which we did. she even told me she’d seen me in the audience, asking if i was in the front on the left, which i was.

even all that is still just scratching the surface. weve “known” each other for 5 years now and every time i think she’s done the most she can do, she outdoes herself again. not to mention when im at these events, i see her treat all the fans she meets with all of that kindness too. naturally all of this has made me love her all the more.

- finally, lets just be honest here..........................shes REALLY fucking hot.

[thisiskatsblog]

im 18 and im so fking ashamed of my bisexuality. my friends are openly lgbt and my oarents arent even that homophobic. but i know when my mother used to think i was gay things were different, she didnt treat me diefferent but i felt exposed and i hated it. so now she thinks im straight and its the paradox where i hate her thinking that but at the same time i dont... idk if im ever going to have the courage to come out , maybe to my siblings ... idk why im writing this its my own fault i have this internalized homophobia anyways

warm virtual hugs my dear bi friend.

please understand one thing: internalized homophobia is really not your fault.  for 18 years society has been sending you messages that it’s not okay to be bi, that it’s a phase, that it’s greedy, that it doesn’t exist, that you’re really a lesbian, that it’s really easier to pretend to be straight and get married and have kids like society expects you to. there is no way that all of this messaging isn’t going to affect you. every LGBTQ person deals with it. and every LGBTQ person is going to have their own pace at throwing all these junk messages out. 

you are strong, and protecting yourself, by not coming out before you are ready and feel comfortable. if you feel too vulnerable now, don’t do it. i think it’s a good idea to build your strength and confidence about this at your own pace. please be kind to yourself and give yourself time to enjoy the good parts of being bi. giving yourself time to let it be something that makes you strong and unique will give you so much more confidence when you do come out. there is no hurry, and no pressure to do things now. you are fully entitled to all the time you need to feel comfortable with yourself to come out... to the people you choose to come out to.

over time, that mixed feeling about wanting to set your mother straight and wanting to “hide” from her, will shift one way or the other and it’s okay to wait until that shift comes. there is no hurry. and please don’t let yourself be fooled into feeling ashamed for that. you didn’t go into that closet because you were afraid and needed a place to hide. society built that closet around you. it takes a while to break it down. 

personally, i think you are amazing!! at 18 i hadn’t even figured out that i was bi.  i am 43 now and i never had a moment of coming out to my parents. they met my “best friend” that i had at 19, and I think my dad suspected there was more to it (i only “got it” myself years later). my mom gives likes to all my LGBTQ related posts on facebook. i think in their eyes, i was a questioning teen, who turned out “straight” in the end (i had a kid with my male partner) and who became a vocal ally. i can live with that. i am out to my closest friends. i am out to my kid and his dad. the rest of my family are far away and i would need to explain so much and i know at least two of them wouldn’t understand or accept. if this relationship ends and i’d be with a woman next, i’d probably tell them. and the two in question would probably conclude i’m really a lesbian, having difficulties with that, they would not get it. and I could live with that as well. the people who need to get me, get me. 

in short, please give yourself time, and try to enjoy the good things about bisexuality. things that helped love being bisexual: all the great info at Bisexual Index (website down at time of writing but they were there last week, I’m sure it’s just a glitch) for their great list of debunked myths about bisexuals, watch TV programmes and movies with awesome bisexuals in them (read the comments in advance, they also warn you for hurtful depictions), read books about bisexuality (x, x, ) or watch this TED talk. we are superhero’s with the power of invisibility. and it’s our choice when and for whom we decide to drop the invisibility cape. i 

[justtamisfitt]

Snowy

Chapter 4

Genre: Hybrid!AU Poly!AU angst, fluff, maybe future smut

characters: Hybrid!Reader x BTS, Human Namjoon, Human Jin, tiger hybrid taehyung, black panther hybrid yoongi, ragdoll cat hybrid jimin, bunny hybrid Jungkook, golden retriever hybrid hobi

Warnings: mentions of past abuse, slight blood, swearing 

Bright and early the happy home was bustling with excitement and anticipation. Jin was making breakfast with the help of yoongi. Tae and jungkook were playing video games In the living room. Hobi and Jimin were sitting at the island Jimin was still bleary eyed with his head was bobbing up and down slightly. Hobi watched as the kitten drooped while scrolling through some social media.

It was simply domestic, it was home.

Namjoon came down the stairs, phone to his ear. As he got to the kitchen he ended the call with a click. “Who was that?” Jin questioned as he walked over the give him a hug.

“The Shelter. I called ahead to make sure she stayed there for now.” Joon answered, returning the soft hug. “Oh perfect! I assume we’re going after breakfast?” Jin asked. “Yeah that’s fine. The sooner we get there the better.” Namjoon said, walking over to get a glorious cup of coffee.

“Breakfasts ready!” Jin exclaimed loudly enough for jungkook and taehyung to break their joined concentration.

As everyone sat at the table Taehyung and Hobi talked very excitedly about the still unknown hybrid.

“Careful boys. You don’t want to get your hopes up too much. She may not want to come with us-she doesn’t even know us!” Mama-Jin spoke to the wound-up bunch. “Jins right, we are just going to talk to her.” Namjoon followed up.

“But she has to come here...” Hobi muttered to himself.

“oh yeah.. joonie you called the shelter right?” jin questioned with raised eyebrows.

“yeah why?” Namjoon looked slightly puzzled as he answered

“Did they tell you what kind of hybrid she is? Oh! and do they know her name? Jin asked curiously.

“ oh right! So apparently she’s a snow leopard hybrid, but, they don't know her name. The only things she said have been sarcastic remarks regarding the staff.” Namjoon informed the group excitedly. Everyone gasped in surprise.

“Wow! Arent snow leopards really rare?” It was Jungkook who questioned for the first time. 

“Yeah. Barely any are left thanks to poaching and trapping....” yoongi muttered with disgust. But he was secretly happy that the mysterious hybrid was close to his breed. Taehyung was equally happy but much more open about it, to have someone as a cousin breed.

After cleaning up and Jin being a mama making sure everyone would be okay while they were. After all they had no idea how lone they’d be gone. The drive to the shelter was quiet, both Namjoon and Jin left in their heads thinking about the if, ands, and buts to the situation. Unlike Frost who was completely oblivious about the whole ordeal. As far as she knew she was pretty much...….fucked. Boy was she in for a interesting morning.

As soon as the pair got to the shelter the pair went straight to the front desk. Where a blond women with a pinched nose and glasses perched a top the bridge. When she looked up and noticed the two walking towards the desk she spoke in a high pitched voice. “ Good morning, What can I do for you today?” Namjoon was the one to speak “ Ah yes, my name is Kim Namjoon. I called earlier about seeing a hybrid that just arrived here.”  The women started typing on her computer while making annoying clicking sound . “Yes. I have it right here. You want to see Hybrid:1AX9Q45M, correct?” she questioned Namjoon “Is that a female snow leopard hybrid? He questioned back. “Yes it is. She hasn't spoken her name, frankily, the only things she has said have been inappropriate.”   “Inappropriate how?” Jin spoke up “Well... she referred to the two men who brought her here as “Twiddle-dee” and “twiddle-dum” and she continues to mock and try to attack anybody who goes near her.” the women replied. Jin held a small smile at the mocking names, thinking she must have a great sense of humor like him.

“Alright then. I’m going to take you down that hall to show you the hybrid to make sure its the one you talked about. After that ill take you to a room where you and the hybrid can talk.” the women talked as she walked around the desk to in front of the men. “Okay.” said the men in unison. “follow me.” she said as she walked towards the “Dangerous Hybrids” door. 

When they entered through the door Jin and Namjoon were gobsmacked. Straight down the hallway there were concrete cells. Each ‘room’ had a small viewing window with thick bars crossing the sturdy glass, along with a heavy steel door with at least a dozen locks. Seeing how everything was virtually made from concrete the atmosphere was dark and...well..dangerous, like walking through a dark ally past midnight.

As they made their way down the corridor the two men tried to peer into the windows. When they did, they wish the hadn't . Weak and sickly looking hybrids chained against the wall, some hybrids, however, had muzzles and were growling fiercely when they walked by.

Every sight of the poor hybrids made Jin want to throw up, cry, and faint all in the same moment. Namjoon only felt anger, how could someone just do this to them? Nobody deserves this, All this for being aggressive....No wonder their labeled as aggressive, knowing a place like this is where people who claim they “help”will send you. Chained up and locked up...that's the fate of a hybrid who tries/wants to be more than some fucking “pet”.

“Hybrid:1AX9Q45M is right here.” Women stopped in front of door at the end of the hallway. Namjoon and Jin looked through the window to check if it was really the same hybrid. When they looked they saw a mess of white curly hair draped across the floor, but, in the dark room that's all they could make out but the knew it was her.

“Yes that is the one. Can we see her?” Namjoon looked back to the women for an answer. “Yes you can . Now I take you to a separate room and i’ll have someone take the hybrid there.” in a monotone voice the women started back down the corridor. Before they went to follow they looked back through the window to see two piercing, glowing icy eyes staring at them through the blackness. The sight sent chills down each of the mens spines.

Namjoon and Jin waited patiently in the room. They sat on one side of a table while one car was placed on the other. “ I wonder if she’ll recognize us...” Jin mumbled to Namjoon nervously. “ I’m sure she does, don't worry,” Namjjon comforted Jin while wrapping an arm around his shoulder squeezing gently.

Frost POV 

‘Wonder where they’re taking me today.” I thought as two men I haven't seen before escorted me down the hall. I couldn't fight back much... my injuries seem to be catching up to me. I’m too weak Ive got to save any strength I have just in case. Besides, its not like anybody here is going to mend me... not like id let them near anyway.

The men finally stop at a door after weaving through multiple corridors. Before they open the door I take a chance and scent the room. I smell two male humans, but, they smell familiar...one smells of lavender and the other man smells like soft cotton and rain. Then it clicked, These are the men from the lobby yesterday! but, what are the doing back here? 

[mirkwoodshewolf]

I may aswell rant here because my notes and friends arent trustworthy and there's a really small chance you'll actually read this. everything hurts. my self harming has gotten worse, same with my eating disorder. my mum always shouts at me, I understand that that's what she's meant to do but it really upsets me. my brother is an absolute arsehole. I dont know why I'm doing this I'll stop here because honestly who gives a shit, it's better just to bottle up my emotions anyways. I'm sorry

No my dear don’t bottle it up. It’ll only make things worse. 

I am sooooo sorry you’re going through this shit. And no you don’t deserve to be yelled at by your mom, she’s not meant to do that to you, if she’s constantly yelling at you THAT’S ABUSE!!! And your brother, god I wish I could be there physically and let you have a safe house with me. But for now this will have to do.

Take some private time to yourself, have yourself in your room or whatever room you feel safe in and listen to some music, meditation videos, ASMR, whatever makes you happy and calm. 

Now I have not dealt with self-harm or eating disorders but I have had classmates who had dealt with it and it’s hard to recover from that, especially in these dark times we’re dealing with now (damn corona virus). But my darling I’ve read your message and I’m responding to you and I’m sending all the best virtual hugs I can give you.

If you can try (again this is depending on how your country/state if you’re US with quarantine protocol right now) maybe when the weather is nice, go for a walk and try to clear your mind. It’ll help, trust me. Because if you continue to do this to yourself, you’ll only make yourself sicker and sicker till finally death is knocking at your door, it’ll be a one way streak. There’s no going back from it. And your friends don’t want that to happen. I don’t want that to happen.

You are a BEAUTIFUL person, a WONDERFUL human being, and have TOO much to give to the world. Don’t listen to the negativity your mom and brother give you, they are pushing you to do these things. Don’t give in to them. 

 I hope this was helpful and shows you that someone does care about you lovely. And give your friends time, they might be too stressed out with the whole corona outbreak, but give them time to calm down and soon they’ll come around. But until then I’m here for you dear :)

[nobodies-png]

tbh i think square/disney really wanted the organization to be bad™ and irredeemable™ but they shot themself in the foot after they sprinkled in the various moments where its established that the individuals of the org arent inherently evil. which means that them having ienzo be a child originally makes it strange to have such malicious hate aimed at him in the same series where characters are expected to grow and learn and sympathize. but idk lol

h o n e s t l y ? y E Ah

im taking this chance to ramble under the cut , wh e e z e. Warning for KH3 spoilers and Mod Demyx rant rant

in my humble ass opinion, it really just feels like Nomura had a bunch of cool ideas in general, but then the train went rogue and they started adding a shit ton of plot twists (that they’d later have to explain and make relevant to the main plot) for the sake of continuing the saga and milking more money bc KH was part of so many people’s childhoods

like, it’s one of my fave games and sagas ever but to be honest, i’d love for some other company to fucking remake the entire plot without the pretense of “we gotta be kid friendly bc Disney is here uwu”. Like, you can’t really be dramatic and make any important events when every character is just gonna come back, only killing off those that you don’t know how to continue.

and it’s such a weird fucking ? amalgamation of stuff too ? not even the fact that we’re mixing talking animals,disney princesses and final fantasy shit into it, but like - sometimes it shows scenes that are too dark for Disney and sometimes it just skims over shit that it should have some proper closure because o h it’s too dark for a kid’s game. And then even deeper shit is hinted in the novels and manga bUT TYING BACK TO MY PREVIOUS ANSWERED POST, YOU CAN’T EXPAND ON LORE TO MAKE YOUR CREATION MORE STABLE LIKE THIS - IF YOU WANT TO EXPLAIN OR EXPAND UPON SOMETHING, HAVE B A L L S AND DO IT IN THE GAME, WHICH IS THE MAIN FOCUS 

Like, in KH3 they wanted everyone to get redeemed and “close off a chapter of this story” but honestly ? it was fucking rushed and done in a pretty shitty way, in my opinion. 

Ienzo just shows up wanting to help and there’s no repercussions to his actions as a nobody, he’s just like “uwu hi” and everyone’s too caught up in Sora having a phone to even care that this was one of the guys that gave them h e l l in Castle Oblivion. Same with the other apprentices, Aeleus and Dilan get no spoken lines, just a line explaining how they also wanted to be better tossed in all carelessly. That’s their redemption. 

And don’t get me wrong, I fucking adore Zexion/Ienzo, he was my crush as a kid, but ? he’s just used to show that Nobodies can be chill and they’ve been all controlled by a bigger evil, as well as part of Ansem’s own redeeming arc instead of having his O W N redeeming arc. He’s virtually useless despite all the protagonism they gave him in KH3, cause sure he calls Sora to let him know shit and he’s supposedly “working on Big Stuff for the Good Guys(tm)”, but all of this work and character development happens off-screen. Same with Vexen/Even - and he at least gets like two scenes showing that he actively works in the shadows to redeem himself. 

And I know it’s hard to make a game and they’ve been at it for a long fucking time and it requires a lot of shit but ? ? ? hONESTLY I DONT KNOW ABOUT YOU ALL BUT I PREFER TO GET A SOLID CLOSURE ON THE MAIN SHIT  AND THEN MAYBE GET MORE CLOSURE FOR LESS BUT STILL IMPORTANT GROUPS IN OTHER GAMES OR REMIXES SINCE THEYRE SUPER KEEN ON MAKING A SHIT TON OF SPIN-OFFS AND STUFF. LIKE, THAT SEEMS BETTER THAN HAVING A LOT OF SMALLER PLOTS JUST SPRINKLED THERE LIKE “WHOOPS AND THEY WERE ALL HAPPY AGAIN” 

cAUSE THEY DON’T EVEN STOP THERE. THEY TRY TO CLOSE A LOT OF SHIT, BUT THEN ADD A LOT OF VAGUE CRYPTIC SHIT FOR THE UPCOMING GAMES AND STORIES ? ? ? 

like I love the final battle part a lot because it’s ? ? ? so fucking badass and it’s the end of all this journey we’ve been on, it’s Sora vs Xenahort, it’s the light vs the darkness, it’s Master Eraqus’ legacy vs Xenahort’s army. 

but it’s just an easy cheap way to close off so much shit in a short time.

the sea salt trio ? reunited. the wayfinder trio ? reunited. the remaining Nobodies who still have no fucking backstories ? gone with a hint of “we’ll be back as good guys”. Like, they added fucking Ephemera as the “light from the past”, inviting the connection between the current timeline with KHux bUT THERE’S STILL NOTHING ON LAURIAM/MARLUXIA. AND THEN THERE’S A FUCKING CUTSCENE OF VENTUS HUGGING A FUCKING CHIRITHY LIKE, YOURE NOT EXPLAINING NOR HELPING ANYONE, NOMURA.

LIKE THE SECRET CUTSCENE IMPLIES 2 THINGS : NEW CHARACTERS (FROM RIKU’S POINT OF VIEW, SINCE HE’S WATCHED BY YOZORA) AND THE COME BACK OF THE TWEWY FRANCHISE WHOSE INVOLVEMENT HAD BEEN COMPLETELY IGNORED AND JUST ABANDONED SINCE DDD. SURE, DREAM EATERS WERE HELLA IMPORTANT AND THERE’S SLEEPING WORDS THERE. AND THERE’S IMPORTANT SHIT GOING ON WITH VANITAS AND THE UNVERSED. BUT ALL WE GOT WAS A DREAM EATER SUMMONING, LIKE 5 UNVERSED ENEMIES AND MORE UNNECESSARY CONFUSION

Like I get it that KH3 was supposed to be the ending of some things and the beginning of other new things and I get that there were a lot of setbacks and things involved, but even with it’s amazing graphics and fun gameplay, it’s still another trainwreck regarding plot. But we all just keep eating it up because we’re desperate to know how it ends and bc childhood nostalgia keeps us here at gunpoint

also i’m mad that out of all KH girls, only Aqua got her time to shine. Like sure, you can argue and say that Kairi took the spotlight after saving Sora again and being a good 70% of Sora’s strength, but as usual she was thrown back into her spot as “princess in distress”, with her training and character development happening off-screen in a place that conveniently has no effect to the current events. And speaking of training, she just immediately becomes besties with Axel despite all the shit they went through with him trying to kidnap her and whatnot. And sPEAKING OF AXEL, HE GOT WAY MORE DEVELOPMENT THAN ROXAS OR XION OR KAIRI OR AQUA HERSELF

AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING CAUSE AQUA GOES THROUGH A LOT OF SHIT IN THIS GAME - She finally succumbs to darkness, she goes out of it, she saves Ven, reunites with Terra and after sO MANY FUCKING YEARS, she’s back on the realm of light. And that moment when she asks where they are and they tell her she’s back home and she raises her head to look at the sun and she cries ? ? that made me S H I V E R and TEAR UP MYSELF - but still, after all of that she goes to pretty much doing nothing while Axel here goes through a keyblade training, seeing Kairi as Xion, making ammends with his best friend, reuniting with his two adopted kids after so much shit and hinting anOTHER SUBPLOT WITH HIM, ISA AND A “SECRET GIRL” FRIEND THEY HAD.

BUT FROM XION WE ONLY GET THE PLOT CONVENIENT COMEBACK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BATTLE SO SHE CAN REUNITE WITH HER FRIENDS. A BIT OF INNER ANGST HERE AND THERE AND BOOM IT’S OVER SHE’S HAPPY NOW. 

AND NAMINE ? DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED. SHE’S GONE FOR SO LONG, ONLY SHOWING UP AS A STAR, MENTIONED OFF HAND BY KAIRI AND THEN SHE FINALLY GETS HER DESERVED LIFE IN THE ENDING CUTSCENE WHEN RIKU COMES TO PICK HER ASS UP. (im also mad that everyone got a happy/bittersweet ending except Vanitas and Repliku but that’s just me being sad aBOUT MY SONS)

sO LONG STORY SHORT :

I hate that this entire saga is a wreck but it still has me grabbed by the balls. Like I bought the KH special edition PS4 just to play when KH3 came out

[princess-of-embarrassment]

Some 3 am realizations about life, relationships and maybe more?? idk whatever have fun.

Ok before i start on this shit I am going to say it is 3 am and i am just dumping some thoughts like i usually do. Sorry for the shit grammar, disorganized thoughts and all that jazz... In a sense i feel like this is a letter to myself and what i have been trying so damn hard to understand so yeah i am talking to myself and to this website. I think. Idk. i will probably delete this in the morning when i am back on bad bitch mode and go back to posting memes pero por ahora vamos a ver como nos va. Mayb ei will leave it up bc i forget or because i dont care who sees it. sorry for the shitshow of a post you are about to read but you probably already kinda know me so yay! I debated posting this shit because the internet is a wildin place but oh well!!1!!11

ok tumblr it is 3 in the morning and i have 100% regressed into being a 15 years old on this damn website shitposting and reblogging some corny ass posts but it feels right, so here i am attempting to process it through the only form i know how to actually know how to cope with things. I mean memes are cool and all but lets be real, they don’t address the problems. this is the one place i can brain dump all of my thoughts and not really care about where they go because they will eventually disappear in the tumblr algorithm.

My old blog was often the only separation I had between my reality and the life i really wished i had, but now I have that life that I always wanted so why the hell am i back at square one? To be fair, the life that i have right now may not be envied by many but its a pretty darn good life to me. Im safe 99.9% of the time. The other .1% is a story for another day. I have been trying to figure out for months as to why i’m back to being so active on here and now that it’s 3:00am I realize it’s because of self isolation (thanks corona!). 

Let me start off by saying this; my reality is not something I am going to be able to escape. Ever. It has brought me to where i am today, allowed me to meet some really incredible people and i am so so grateful. I have learned so much in the past few years. i am grateful what happened happened. Wild, i know. I escaped it physically but i cannot escape it mentally, at least for now. School, work, writing, dealing with my freshmen’s problems was what kept my brain occupied and away from having to face the part of my life that I really just want to forget. To be fait my trauma response has taken pretty good care of fucking up my memory and all of those fun things but ironically the things i want to forget about so badly are the things i think about every single day without skipping a beat. brains are weird like that.

I am ok now but sometimes i forget and fall back into my new reality. That is ok. People that know my story ask me why i don’t write about it on a public platform because it’s inspiring?? or hopeful?? or whatever cliche people want to use when addressing a topic that makes them uncomfortable and they want to feel better about the life they live. 21 year old latina girl faces adversity and lives the american dream (barely)..i mean, i did run a whole ass magazine and wrote a piece for graduation including some details of my story but that was like the rated g version with only the little sad parts that people are able to handle without feeling like their comfort zone is being violated. MEdia is a wonderful place isnt it???  so i get where they are coming from, but what they dont understand is that an international platform is not where i can share any of these thoughts... Listen, I know this is cryptic and confusing and you are probably really curious about what the hell happened to me but i don’t feel safe to type it out on international platforms with public access. I don’t know if i ever will... Yeah i can talk to people i trust about it because i am in control of the space and the situation and who is obtaining that information but you never really know with the internet. 

maybe in the future i’ll write a book on it. even then i will probably use my alias make it a YA fiction with an added love story that ends in a happy ending. Maybe one day one of the school girl crushes I have will turn into that YA story and i dont have to make any of it up.

If i am honest...this blog is the only safe place i will probably ever have where he wont find me. He can find my school and my address and phone number and work and everything in between because that is just the way things work. Yeah yeah i get it stop posting shit on social media that is how he finds you whatever. What people dont understand is that I cant stop living my life again. I already started so i cant go back to giving him that power. It makes no sense. Also, his family is too confused by all of the ups and downs of the last year that they dont really know where i am going or what i am doing. So anyways, long story short - That’s why i am back on here, because it has become the same written safe haven I had when i was 15 and tried to escape my physical reality. Only difference is that i am trying to manage the mental reality of it all...

I also have so many questions about what to do next. Like i mentioned in another post, i didnt think i would make it to 21 but i did. I didnt think this far ahead so i guess i will just figure it out along the way but hear me out. How do i face a new reality that no one can relate to. At least not the people around me. How do i make friends and know when the “right time” is to tell them hey btw if this happens lmk lol. Even more importantly (because it relates to my future as world famous YA novelist.. lol sure grace...) How do I even date someone??? many questions are tied to that. like... I know theyre going to ask. “what happened?” “who is it?” “how can i help?” “Isnt there something we can do?”. i am more than willing to answer these questions because fuck, if im dating someone i would be curious too.. but do i even answer those questions. How do i know they are ready to handle that kind of information? how can i guarantee theyre not going to leave. How can i know that they arent going to be frightened by what has happened. how do i know they are not going to think differently of me. How do i explain to this person “yeah i have stress nightmares about what happened and when i wake up i think i am back in that situation and not where i live and i have to remind myself i am in a whole different area code but then its fine lol so if we share a bed at any point in time dont be alarmed if i wake up in a panic.” or how do i explain to them when something triggers me and all i can do is freeze because maybe it is him. Maybe he finally found me. but then i am back to reality and move on with my day because that is the only thing left to do. I cant throw myself a shitty pity party thats generic as fuck and i dont have time for it but whatever. moving on. next question. How do i know theyre not gonna walk away because they have the misconception so many people have?? Just because i went through some shit doesnt mean i am unstable or unloveable or whatever bs people think. This isnt going to go away. This shit is a aprt of me but it doesn not define me. it is not who i am.I dont have the option to make it go away but people have the option to pick up their things and go. seems unfair to me sometimes. It seems unfair to generalize people like that. I am always open to a new relationship but people expect me to be sitting at home scared to go out into the world and live my life. I have a life to live and i am so ready to explore it by myself or with someone by my side but quarantine has brought me back on here to deal with the fact that i am back to being stuck inside. Mentally and physically. One sucks less than the other. 

I have so many other questions but i am feeling tired again and its almost 4am so maybe i should go to bed. Y’all dont know how happy i am to have this trash site to vent to in the middle of the night. theres some relly judgy people on here but at least i know my feed wont judge me or try to fix what has happened. it will just listen.

Anyways, i doubt anyone will read this because this post got long as fuck but if you did i give you a high five and a virtual hug for getting through the clusterfuck of sentences. Thanks tumblr. If i ever go viral again on this shitshow of a website i may have to bring back my studyblr and go underground lmfao jk maybe. I cant wait to hug my friends and the people i have met that have become a part of my daily routine (yes even during social isolation, get off my ass I am still socially isolating). All i can do for now is wait for someone who cares about me for me and isn’t scared of my past or the pieces of it that linger in my present. I deserve nothing less. if they cant do that they are not worth my time and i hope they drop their keys every single time they go to open their front door. oh... they also better be ready for the hours i spend typing away my thoughts on my computer. Maybe one day they will be allowed to read them too... lol maybe not. whatever who knows. Peace out kiddos stay healthy xoxo.

[lnarizakis]

bro im legit crying in the club rn bc i just read the last chapter. like i actually cried. why am i like this😹anyways.... to get it right off the bat, i was both inaccurate and accurate with my predictions. in that i predicted the correct things but were slightly wrong or didnt happen at the time i predicted.

MANGA SPOILERS.

— so they are in fact playing against argentina. and we get a shit ton of ppl we know who are on the japanese team which is absolutely wack. and YESS WE GOT NEKOMA APPEARANCES FINALLY. and bro..... haiba sibling modelling???????? simp mode 1000. ((and lets not skip over how good yaku looks omg))

— our queen kanoka is continuing volleyball, and im glad that furudate brought her up again along with tanaka and shimizu cheering her on to show that yeah, this is as mch closure as were gonna get

— iwaizumi became an athletic trainer and i am sobbing bc im a student athletic trainer at my school😻😻

— oikawa’s entrace was epic as ever. he carries his presence with the intimidation of his words and the build-up of his introduction. very epic and very cool. very unlike how i predicted but this was way better honestly. ((it does make me sad how he technically was a virtually unknown player bc he never went to nationals))

— THE WAY OIKAWA AND HINATA HUG EACH OTHER AFTER SEEING EACH OTHER IS SO CUTE— its so surprisijg too because we know how they really were rivals before and now theyre friends

— KYOTANI AND TSUKISHIMA ON THE SAME TEAM!!!! very unexpected but i like the dynamic.

— IM ALSO CRYING BC KITA IS WATCHING THEM ON THE TV WITH OSAMU AND HE SAYS “arent my old teammates amazing?” HE WILL FOREVER BE PROUD OF THEM AS HIS TEAMMATES NO MATTER WHERE THEY GO IN LIFE.

— i was right about how the game would start (except that sakusa receives instead of hinata). im glad that this was the case because we get a flurry of memories that lead up to this very moment. i thjnk as i first read the chapter i began tearing up because we witnessed all of this happen as well!

— and OMG????!!!!!!! another kid biking past that epic moment?????? its like... its like... a full 360!!!! id like to say that it parallels with how hinata and kageyama went from teammates (high school) back to rivals (adlers v msby) then to teammates again but that may be a bit of a stretch. and the way they fist bump at the end.... a symbol of their friendship

— and then of course haikyuu ends with hinata and kageyama going up against each other as rivals because thats what they are and forever will be. rivals... because they help each other improve and make each other happy... as rivals

ANYWAYS this ended up being really long and just me analyzing the last chapter but im on my phone so i cant add a read more but uhhh yeah! if u read all of this i am extremely proud of u and im glad we got to witness the end of haikyuu!! together!!!

MANGA SPOILERS. my prediction for what ch 402 will look like: so, as a recap of the last few panels, we’re in 2021 with the og boys who are now part of the national team. theyre abt to play against the national team of argentina.

however, before we get a shot of the opposing team, we get shots of different ppl like we havent seen yet, such as lev who is uhh idk playing volleyball for russia probably and akagi whos idk playing for another team and married to me, we also get shots of diff ppl, such as bokuto and ushijima who are prob on the same team (it was hinted with that one drawing ((yes u know the one))), and ofc the karasuno team cheering them BOTH on. more ppl make slight appearances, like ppl from nekoma I HOPE

then we get to the start of the game we see oikawa looking as beautiful as ever and hes looking DIRECTLY at kageyama and hinata, and then the game starts with oikawas serve which hinata digs beautifully, and of course everyones like nicee hinata ur doing wonderful and then kageyama sets to hinata and they do their all famous quick. but this prob wont happen since its awfully similar to the final match of the game but itll make for a good scene that cuts to the final part of the chapter

it was SLIGHTLY HINTED in ch 401 that tenma was inspired by hinatas growth to the point where he knows what he wants to write for his next manga. so we cut to tenma sitting at his desk (akaashi is prob next to him or something) and he is drawing hinata in the air, similar to the image that yachi used for that one poster for their vbc, and hes like brainstorming titles ((okay this next part prob wont happen but i like it so its cute)) and tenma is like idk what to have the title be so he consults akaashi and akaashi is like idk either so he consults bokuto and hes like... what about “haikyuu!!” and this is over text which is why there are two exclamation points.

and this last part also probably wont happen but then the first volume of haikyuu is sitting on a bookshelf and theres this short kid who picks it up and is inspired just as hinata was inspired BANG BANG THATS THE ENDING OF HAIKYUU but tbh its prob gonna end with hinata on the tv and another short kid is watching and is like omg i wanna b like hinata and so yeah thats my prediction!

if i get ANY of this right i am reblogging this post and marking which parts i get right so yeah❤️

[infnthoya]

Hello my favorite Howon stan

stuff, not at all... hah. Why am i like this. Actually there is.. if you don't mind of course.. something has been bothering me lately. and it's about Infinite. And since I am not really.. familiar with.. other wonderful people in this fandom.. and also because you have always been so nice to me and you are overall an amazing person I thought that maybe I can use your kindness a little.. I am so sorry if I am making you uncomfortable right now, feel free to ignore this message.It's just.. their contract is expiring and I am afraid if I'll ever be able to see them on stage again. Like together...

MY SWEET POLISH ANON IS HEREEEE!!! okay i really dont know where to start but let me first say... I LOVE YOU!!! seriously i cant find words to describe how happy you make me every time you send me messages! 

you might ask “then why didnt you include all my messages above?”, the reason is, YOU ARE BEING SO UNFAIR TO YOURSELF!!! you are saying too many bad things about yourself and i didnt want other people to see those. I AM OFFICIALLY FORBIDDING YOU FROM PUTTING YOURSELF SO DOWN ALRIGHT???

ive been going thru a shitty time for more than half a year now. i mean i wish i could be positive and all (becuz right now i feel like im whining like a baby and seeking attention) but thats the truth with me. nothing is going well and actually everything keeps going worse and worse and im just waiting for things to stop sucking so much :D as for tumblr, i havent been checking my dash for over 3 months. but i do check my activity page often so i can also see if i have any messages. (tho there is almost nothing going on lol) i dont feel like giffing either and for that, id like to apologize everyone! im really sorry for disappointing you guys :( i wish i could keep on providing you stuff like you were expecting me to do but i really cant bring myself to do it. i hope things will get a little better soon and i get some joy inside me and start giffing again. 

as for your question my dear, few days ago i saw on twitter that all members -except one, visited woollim building. and there were news on websites that woollim said that its most likely that the members will renew their contracts. but like i said there is one member who is nowhere to be found and that member is *drumroll* LEE HOWON! lol yeah so there havent been any news about him (or at least i havent seen except a fan spotted him in front of a night club in hongdae a few days ago) and it makes me think that maybe they are waiting for him to go meet the ceo so they can release more detailed stuff about “ot7″. but let me tell you that you arent alone for being worried, there are quite a lot of fans who are waiting nervously. if you ask me, idk if its becuz kpop has mostly lost its importance in my life due to my current situation or not but i dont feel worried. if they stay together, ofc i’ll be happy and keep supporting them like i used to do but if they decide to disband, i wont feel bad either becuz they are pretty old right now so they might wanna go into whatever else career they would like and i’ll support them for that too. but since you, and many others, will feel sad in case of a disbanding, i hope they will stay together for many more years. and lastly, i only told you what i saw on twitter but i didnt do any other “research” about the issue so if there is any other person who has more info and would like to share it, please do share :)

i really wish i could give you a more definite and happy answer but thats all i know for now :( but i hope you wont feel sad about this whole thing. and you are always welcome to come to me and let anything off your chest. as for contacting each other, i am and will forever see you as an amazing person becuz even tho i did nothing to deserve it, one day you came to me out of the blue and said all those amazing things and made me the happiest person! and you have been doing it ever since and like i said, i didnt even do anything to deserve it! all i used to do here was to blog about kpop idols but you keep coming to me and lifting my mood up like a rocket and i really dont know how to thank you! so i dont want you to feel pressured about it, like i said i check my activity often so i’ll see your messages here as well but if you (and any of my followers) want to talk to an old, boring soul like me, my kakaotalk id is bigwideeyes (my twiter id is the same and my ig is bigwideyes you see im very creative!)

gah i really hope you can read this honey. well i always tag you as “Polish anon” so that you (and i) can track our convos^^; i wish you ALL THE BEST in the world! i hope whatever you are busy doing, is sth that you are enjoy doing. im sending you huge virtual hugs ~(^3^)~ always be healthy and happy

ah! i almost forgot! so idk if you knew about it but ot7 had gone to japan some time ago and they had interviews there (as always). one of the questions was “whats the place/country that suits your atmosphere the best?” and Howon said POLAND! lol he really loved it there, im a little jealous :P if you ever spot him there, please let me know okay? i count on you since you are my favorite anon hahaha

[so-caffeinated]

Something angsty just occurred to me when you mentioned the Fathers Day one shot-what Will's first mother's day after Samantha dies must be like. Oliver and Felicity probably encourage him to join their mother's day crunch/celebrations as usual but don't push too hard. Will comes but leaves early. He checks in on David &Bethany but leaves again to visit Sams grave. Felicity finds him there&comforts him. He protests: she should be enjoying herday.I'm a mother Will,I can't be happyif my kids arent

WAY TO SEND ME ON A FUCKING ANGST SPIRAL, ANON. This became a HIGHLY DEPRESSING FLASHFIC with obvious warnings for coping with grief, loss and the death of a parent. I DID NOT ASK FOR THESE FEELS, ANON. 

May 2032

Will forgets about Mother’s Day until the week before when Nate gleefully whispers to him that he made his mom a necklace with glass beads and it’s really pretty and he thinks she’ll love it and isn’t that great? His heart sinks because he’d sort of blocked it all out of his mind entirely but there it is right in front of him anyhow: the first mother’s day without his mom.

When he goes to work the next morning he immediately offers to swap shifts with a woman on his truck who has two little kids and she’s delighted to have Mother’s Day off. It helps... at first. Keeping busy is good. He learned that a while ago. 

Oliver invites him to dinner, not knowing about the shift change, and mentions that Felicity will understand either way. He mumbles back that he’s working but he bought her a nice plant - the kind she can’t easily kill because her gardening skills are right up there with her cooking skills. Oliver sees right through him but just says “okay” and squeezes his shoulder, adding “I’m here if you need anything. Even if it’s just to talk to sit quietly at a bar with a couple of beers. Okay?” Will doesn’t take him up on that, but he’s grateful anyhow. 

The night before, he works out to the point of exhaustion, spending way too much time in his dad’s gym and not saying a damned word to anyone. He doesn’t even try to make it home, instead passing out in his-old-room-turned-guest-room at his dad’s house. He knows Felicity’s worried; she keeps hovering like she wants to say something. Hell, he knows they’re all worried. Even Nate’s aware enough to be concerned, which is sort of astonishing until Will thinks about how much his baby brother loves his own mom. But he’s still more than a little surprised and incredibly touched when he wakes up the next morning to find Nate’s asleep on the floor in his sleeping bag. It might make Will a few minutes late for work, but he still stops to scoop the nine-year-old up and carry him back to his own room, tucking him into bed and ordering a very confused Buster - who cannot seem to figure out what one of the children is doing asleep somewhere other than a bed -to watch over the boy. 

Working through that first Mother’s Day without his mom turns out to be a mistake in more than one way. For one, he keeps thinking about David and Bethy. He should be there. He’d been so selfish wanting to work through the day and avoid thinking about it when he knows David’s at home with his not-quite-two-year-old trying to cope with the death of his wife just three months ago. He can’t stop thinking about what they’re doing, if David needs someone to lean on, if Bethy needs someone to give her extra love and attention. But the bigger problem presents itself in his job itself. There’s a car wreck they respond to, a family on their way home from Mother’s Day brunch and the mom has dark hair and a bloody gash on her forehead that makes her features a little less discernible and every time Will blinks, it’s his mom. The woman lives - it’s not honestly that bad of an injury - but Will spends the next fifteen minutes after they get back to the firehouse throwing up in the bathroom and the minute he comes out, his captain orders him to go home and take the rest of the week off to get his head on straight, tells him he gets it but if this happens again he’s gonna insist he be cleared by a psychiatrist before coming back to work. 

It’s still early when he leaves, way before the end of his shift, and he knows he could make it to Felicity’s dinner or spend some time talking to his mom’s grave to try and clear his head, but neither of those places need him right now. And, as much as he loves his dad and Felicity and Jules and Ellie and Nate, they’re not what he needs right now, either. 

He relies a lot heavier on the self-drive feature of his car than usual as it steers itself to David’s house - it’s the same one his mom lived in and when he looks around, sometimes it almost seems like she’s still there. The rose bushes she’d loved are just starting to grow new buds and the potpourri scent she liked best still sits in a glass dish by the front door that he’d picked out with her when he was just a kid. But those memories of his mom - of her making this place home - live in him and they live in David. They don’t live in Bethy. She’s so little. It’s only been three months, but she’s so little.

“Hey,” Will says, feeling guilty as hell when he walks in and finds David with his shoulders hunched over and a drawn look on his face. There’s no judgement on his stepfather’s face, though, just surprise at seeing him. “Will! Hi Hi!” Bethy greets him delightedly, reaching up in excitement. She’s only had her cast off for a month or so and the garish wound on her side from the accident has turned into a scar he’s pretty sure will never fade entirely. She doesn’t know about that, though. She doesn’t care. She’s 23 months old and she just wants the arms of someone who loves her, so Will scoops her up and kisses her forehead while she pats his cheeks. “Sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t here. I’m sorry,” he says. He’s talking to her, but he’s really talking to David and he knows it. “It’s okay. I get it,” David says, swallowing heavily. “I didn’t really want to be here today either.”

But he does, he thinks. He does want to be here. Or, maybe it’s that he needs to be here. There’s nowhere and nothing that can make all of this right, that can bring her back. He wants that, wants it more than anything, just for a minute, just for a second. He wishes he could at least tell his mom he loves her, that he always will. He wishes they could have at least left things on better terms. It all feels so stupid now, the way he’d rushed her off the phone, the times they’d argued over his job or him taking his dad’s last name or his difficulty accepting David and Bethy. He’ll do better now. He’ll always be accept them, forever be there for Bethy in any way she needs. And he knows, deep down, that his mom knew he loved her. 

Still... he wishes he could at least finish their time together in a tone more in keeping with the bulk of the way they’d lived it together. 

Beth makes a noise like a fire engine and he smiles at her - because how is that he ever didn’t smile at Bethy. “Do color?” she asks, pointing toward the absurdly huge bin of sparkly crayons that Grandma Donna had added to virtually every day Bethany was in the hospital - like the power of glitter alone might heal the little girl. “No, I think we should do something else,” Will tells her. “I want to look at some pictures.”

“My pictures?” Bethy asks smiling brightly. “Yup,” Will agrees. “Yours and mine and your daddy’s and your momma’s.”

“Will,” David says. It’s too much for the widower and Will can see that right away. His eyes are red-rimmed and his stubble unshaven and this day has already been too much for him. “Just me and Bethy,” Will tells him kindly. “How about you go take some time to yourself. Take a shower, read a book... whatever. I’ve got Bethy and I’ll order up some dinner from that Thai place.”

“I, uh... I made lasagna last night,” David says, sounding almost guilty about it and sniffling as he rubs his nose. “I tried to follow her recipe, but you know how she was. I’m sure she left something out when she wrote it down... she was always doing that... It won’t be as good.”

God, but if that doesn’t sound like a metaphor that makes Will want to be sick all over again. Only, with his family, he knows exactly what piece is missing. “I’m sure we’ll enjoy it anyhow,” he says, forcing himself to smile. David hugs him - that’s a new thing they do, only since his mom died, and Will is reminded starkly every time that the man has no one else - and he kisses Bethany about a half dozen times on her soft little cheeks before heading back to the room he used to share with his wife. 

Will doesn’t know how he does it. He doesn’t know how any of them do it, but especially not David.  

He spends the next half an hour showing Bethany pictures of them with their mom, telling her stories about her own first steps or the day she was born or that time she threw an entire bowl of applesauce at her mom’s face. She won’t remember it this time, it won’t stick yet, but he’ll keep telling her, he decides, and eventually she’ll know these stories like her own name. Her mom will be a part of her life, if only through the secondhand retelling of it. 

They spend the next half hour coloring. Beth still just scribbles but she says it’s her family and she points to the blue one and says it’s her mom. Will figures that’s a start and he asks her if he can keep it. It winds up being the first of Bethany’s drawings to decorate his fridge, but it’s far from the last. 

David comes out a bit later. He looks ever-so-slightly better and the three of them eat a mediocre knockoff of his mom’s lasagna. They’ll never get it right. It’ll never be the same. But they’ll find a new usual way of making it that’s pretty good, anyhow. Will sticks around after dinner, cleaning up the dishes while David cleans up Bethany. She about breaks his damned heart when she heads to bed after her bath though. “Night-night, Will,” she says, kissing his cheek. “Night-night, Dada,” kissing her father. “Night-night, Momma,” she adds blowing a kiss to a picture on the wall. Will fakes a smile until she’s out of sight, headed to her bedroom, and then he cries over the sink the entire time that David somehow manages to tuck Bethy in. 

It’s not fair. Not to Bethany. Not to David. Not to his mom. And not to him. Sometimes it makes him so angry he could scream, has screamed, but that does no good and it just leaves him feeling more broken and helpless afterwards to he tries to breathe through those feelings and just let them go. He’s a firefighter, damn it. He knows how unfair life is, has seen it fade out of people’s eyes right in front of him. But his mom... his mom... 

“You okay?” David asks, startling him. “No,” he answers. “I’m really not.” David makes a noise that’s more a grunt of agreement than anything else. “That makes two of us,” his stepfather agrees. 

David’s not ready to talk about her directly - can’t even say Samantha’s name - and he’s definitely not going to sit around looking at pictures. But the two of them sit on the back porch with a pair of beers until David complains what a bitch it is to take care of rosebushes and Will points out that he thinks the lasagna usually has more garlic and, in spite of everything, that feels like a start. 

[tumblunni]

Digimon World Next Order!! For once a game that ISNT a weirdly named sequel, even though it still sounds like one. 'Order Points' is the name of the revamped battle system. ^_^ Ive only been playing for about four hours but so far I'm really enjoying it! RANDOM RAMBLING ABOUT MY JOY, AHOY!

* First off, its a sequel to the original Digimon World rather than to Cyber Sleuth, so do a bit of research before you buy it, I'd say. Its more of a tamagotchi hybrid rpg than a regular turn-based one. Lots of hugging virtual pets and feeding em snacks! But this has always been my fave genre so I'm happyyyyyy~ * I named my two digimon Hershey and Zephyr cos they started off as terriermon and lopmon. But they immediately diverged off into wildly different digivolution paths instead, so now the names dont make sense XD By some grand coincidence they ended up becoming snowogremon and icedevimon at the same time, so that's what they are now! :3 my popsicle buddies! * Hershey's favourite food is mushrooms/vegetables, and Zephyr is a bit of a diva who hates everything except mineral water. Its funny since Hershey is the fragile magic user of the duo, and then we have this hulking ice shoulderblades yeti being all 'no my carbs'. DUDE WHY U GO AGAINST UR EVOLUTION REQUIREMENTS aaa but i luv u anywayyyyy * Hershey lucked out and got a super powerful technique early on by random chance, this thing that costs 700 mp to deal 700 damage, when everything else is like 50 power. And then they lucked right out of it again, cos Icedevimon cant use that move XD fifteen seconds of power as a rookie... * why do the levels mean basically nothing, yo? the game says this redvegiemon is level 3 but its stronger than the level 6 everything else in the area. Maybe the game is just dumb and levels dont take into account digivolution level? Like.. this is stronger cos its not a rookie, and they didnt even bother to make the level counter say 13 or something so the player could actually tell  Well, now i know to ignore that thing entirely and just judge on their digivolutions! * The difficulty is far lower in the actual raising aspect yet higher in battles... its weird... * Its also a shame that training no longer has unique animations! It doesnt have any animations at all, its just push button dispense stats. They did at least clear up the problem of having to walk manually between each training area and waste valuable time, now there's just one training area that contains all the different trainings in a neat quick navigation menu. But its also a bit less charming and less gamelike when its JUST menus. BUT on the other hand they did mitigate it a bit by throwing in new features like a roulette roll to get bonus stats, and a whole system of complex ways you can win an extra turn on it. (Training next to each other, training opposite skills, having max happiness, someone having just digivolved, one stat gets a bonus turn each day at random...) * Its really nice that the intro of the game has you meet your digimon partners in fully evolved mega form and have a few scenes of dialogue with them before they get poofed down to digieggs by the villain. It helps mitigate the weirdness of your partner digimon being the only digimon that cant talk! * BUT ALSO. NOW THEY TALK. !!!!!! * You get some cute random dialogue popups on the bottom of the screen as you adventure around, and each digivolution has a different set of stuff to say. Its still very minimal and can get repetitive, but its adorable and helps you get more attatched to these lil doofs! * Also its hella nice that you can now pick to play as a girl, for the first time in the tamagotchi-style digimon games! I actually think her design looks cooler than the dude, he just has a streak of blue hair while she has this awesome poisonous-looking striped ponytail that bleeds pixels as you run! Badass! * ALSO thank you for english dubbed dialogue yo. Its not perfect but then again namco bandai games rarely are XD And they included an option to have the original japanese voices if you prefer! * I missed Jijimon so much. Why he never get to appear in anything aside from this spinoff series? He was in one episode of Tamers but that was an awful cameo He has THE MOST STEREOTYPICAL grandpa voice in the english dub and i luv im * The environment design so far is a lot more basic and boring than the old ps1 game for some reason? It seems to fall prey to the usual ps4 designer logic that making stuff BIG makes it automatically good, even if its just annoyingly huge spaces to traverse with barely anything in them. And so far its just been Generic Field A, B and C, with only occasional stuff like a giant battery to let you know its the digital world. And the main town is super small now that everything training has been smooshed into one building... * Its also a lot less sandboxy and interesting to explore, and the digimon recruitment quests kinda suck. I've already found three guys and all of them were fetch quests to gather a certain amount of an item. And now you also have to gather certain amounts of an item from special gathering spots in order to actually build the new shops, which is annoying because its in these huge boring maps that you have to backtrack thru again and again * The battle system is VASTLY IMPROVED, holy SHIT! Its like they somehow read my brain?? Back when i played the first digimon world, i would always get so frustrated at the auto battle and its bad AI that i'd just mash the X button even when i had nothing to do. Somehow I thought it would make my digimon stronger. AND NOW IT ACTUALLY DOES!!! The X button has been remapped to the new cheer function, and if you cheer at the right moment you get more or less Order Points. if you use them you can manually select to use a move at the right timing, use a move without consuming MP, or use a special super move! (waaaay easier than the shoulder buttons thing in the old game) It spices up a very inactive battle system! * Oh and HELL YEAH FOR QUIDE PUZZLE SYSTEM THINGIE! In the first game you had NO WAY OF KNOWING what requirements you needed to meet for each digivolution, or what digimon could turn into what, until after you'd already unlocked it. You had to consult fanmade guides if you wanted to try 100% completion. Now the guide is an actual ingame menu where you unlock tips as rewards for various good actions as a virtual pet owner. You'll likely never unlock all the guide points for a particular digimon stage before you're already past it, unless you raise the same one a bazillion times. But the lil tips every now and then can be useful enough to help you choose which direction to take your training! Just a lil 'oh, ive already hit the HP requirement for this one? i guess I'll try and go for it!' or 'oh darn this one requires maximum deliquency, i guess i wont get it so I should try for something else'. Its useful. My only complaint is that maybe the way to unlock them could have been less random and less easy? Its just a random chance whenever they eat food/get praised after a good thing. * Ultimately so far the few bad points arent bad enough to ruin the enjoyment for me. It just seems a little soulless and rushed, maybe? But I'd enjoy literally anything in this genre, I've been waiting so long for a sequel that even if this was terrible I'd still adore it! And its far from terrible, its just a lil bland. It probably wont have as much replayability as the first game, but it still feels like it'd be fun for one playthrough! * Also, Hershey and Zephyr are my new lil best friends. SUCH A CUTE GIANT MONSTERS YES YOU IS