#V: I am what you made me (Darth Vader with a twist)
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Continued from HERE // @desireandduty
These past several weeks had passed in a bit of a fog for Padme, mostly due to lack of sleep. In the end, they had decided on Theed’s premiere medical facility as the best place for her to give birth. She was glad of the decision, because her recovery had been slow. As a petite woman, it would have been difficult to birth one baby, but two had been exhausting. Without the help of her parents…. she wasn’t sure she could have managed it. The twins were good children, but they were still newborns, which meant they were demanding of time, energy, attention.
If she hadn’t felt like there was a shadowy threat hanging over their heads, Padme would have remained in her parents’ home for months longer. But if Anakin was right and the Emperor did harbor malevolent intent towards her or the twins.. she couldn’t bring that sort of risk down on her parents. So she’d returned to Coruscant only a few days ago, where she at least had the benefit of her handmaidens to help care for the twins. Another pair of arms was needed, because their father had been distancing himself from them ever since they were born. Padme wasn’t stupid. She’d noticed that he came to Naboo less and less frequently. And here it had been three days since she had moved back with only a few buildings as the distance between them, and he had yet to visit.
Or at least he hadn’t until that the early evening, when she’d finally got the twins back to sleep again after their afternoon feeding. She had been shocked and delighted to see him, but there was an undercurrent of hurt there as well. She didn’t understand why he felt the need to keep his distance. He’d yet to come anywhere close to his actions on Mustafar. The more time that passed, the more the incident faded into the past for her. She missed him dreadfully, and the fact that there was no more war or self-imposed secrecy to keep them apart made his absence sting even more painfully.
And now, he'd barely arrived, and he was already up and declaring he ought to leave again. Padme was a proud woman, but she was getting desperate at this point. "Please, stay," she begged, stepping closer and placing both palms on his chest in a pleading gesture. "You only just got here, and I- I miss you so much. I need you. I thought with the war over and us not keeping this a secret that things would be different, but they're not... I don't understand what is keeping you away from us so often."
Life in the new Empire was complicated. It was different than the Republic, although he was glad the Republic was gone. Did he long to be able to live like he was actually married to Padme, once and for all? Of course, he did. But, it wasn’t that simple for him. The Imperial Palace was coming together. It was becoming more like a palace and less like the old Jedi Temple. He didn’t come around that often.
He was still going through changes. He was still trying to adjust to being a Sith, being trained in the ways of the Sith, adjusting his fighting style. The night before, he’d gotten back from finally assembling his new lightsaber, after bleeding a kyber crystal of a dead Jedi. But tonight, he had come by, needing to check on her and the babies.
He had so many concerns. While the emperor knew he was married to her and that she was pregnant, he still feared that he would try to take their babies. He feared her lack of fear of him. She didn’t understand how much more powerful the dark side was, and the fact that what he had done to her, didn’t make her pause at all it seemed, he had to be the rational one. He had to give it time.
While going through all the training he was, he was dangerous. Life was not normal, and it would not be normal again.
“It’s because you refuse to understand how things are. You don’t see the difference in the dark side and what it does. I nearly choked the life out of you and it doesn’t scare you. It scares me, and as long as you don’t see the severity of it, we have to keep a distance. I am here for you and for them, but your recklessness when it comes to me, could get them and you killed. Love can’t always save you. This isn’t something you can just decide is okay.”
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@bchemianrhapscdy them though
— l.h.z (requested by @saferincages)
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─── BREATHE ME IN
a/n: so um...i have no idea what this is. i started this when the kenobi series was coming out and sort of dropped it after a month. but here i am, finally finishing it and making it longer than it was supposed to be. did we really expect me not to find darth vader hot? i think he's where my whole loving a masked character came from. honestly this is basically filth with me trying to shove plot in not so subtly. so i hope y'all enjoy!
summary: the jedi fell and darth vader rose to power, but there's a secret he hides even from his own master.
word count: 5.5k+ (because i'm insane)
pairing: darth vader x f!reader
warnings: EXPLICIT SO MINORS DNI, cussing, angst, tenderness which is shocking, thigh riding, choking (obviously), oral (male receiving), a tad bit of face fucking, dom/sub dynamics, rough p in v sex, overstimulation, more hints of anakin than vader.
You’ll never be able to forget the scent of him after that night one month ago. It was branded in your mind, forever a part of you as he bent you to his will—made you his without even saying a single word. You should have fought him on it; made him see that you weren’t ready to relinquish the power you once held, but you knew the man beneath the mask he wore. You had known Anakin before he became this, before he twisted himself up inside and gave into being Darth Vader.
Even now as you stood in your small home on a planet far away from the Empire’s touch, you could feel his control over you. Long before the order was given and Jedi were slaughtered, you had been one of them. A knight who fought alongside Anakin in the Clone Wars—a warrior who chose the side of good rather than evil.
Then things fell apart. You were told that the man you loved, the person you cherished the most, gave into the dark side.
He became a stranger once more.
But nobody runs from Anakin for long—especially when he’s become a force more powerful than any Jedi could ever hope to be. You were hiding out on Devaron when he found you, attempting first to turn you to the dark side with him. Only for you to see something break in his exterior, his walls dropping for a split second and you felt it like a punch to the chest. He needed you.
This absolute desire was not born out of lust but pure necessity, because even as Darth Vader…Anakin Skywalker still lived beneath the mask and he didn’t know how to live without you. You’d always been the person he turned to when Obi-Wan wouldn’t understand the nature of his feelings. When he could no longer control them himself.
So, he left you there—allowing you to remain a Jedi who chose the light side of the Force over him. But he would return again and again. Desperate for someone to put his strained mind at ease—the memories of his past haunting him with every waking day. Perhaps that's where the submission started. In helping him by allowing him into your bed, into your heart little by little each time until eventually…you yearned for him to.
Jedi weren’t allowed to have such strong attachments, but as a Sith…he could keep you as his for as long as possible. A deal you wholeheartedly agreed to with a single word.
The stars were starting to shine brightly in the night sky as you traversed the dense forest of Devaron, your lightsaber clipped to your side and hood drawn up over your head. You heard his ship land ten minutes ago; knew he now stood in the center of your home awaiting your arrival. So, you took your time. Anakin never liked to wait, Darth Vader was no different, and somehow that brought a smile to your face. So desperate to see you that he would battle his way through the forest alone to find you again.
He would come after you—you knew he would—and that brought back the pool of heat that always found its way to your body when he arrived.
There was something twisted about loving him even the way he was now. How could you, a Jedi Knight of your ability, love something so dark? How could you give into the sinister deliciousness of that side, yet still remain so true to the light side of the Force? The answer was simpler than you thought. In your mind he still remained as Anakin the man you loved and even though you knew what he did, what he now became, you couldn’t let go of your heart fully.
Even if the scars now showed as small canyons and ridges, each one holding a darkness that would ultimately cause your demise.
He knew this.
Nobody loved Darth Vader, nobody gave themselves to the most powerful Sith in the galaxy, without understanding they would die because of it one day. Perhaps that’s what caused the absolute ache in your bones at the mere sight of him. The thought of one day no longer being by his side. Some Jedi may claim you were betraying what you believed in—destroying yourself just for an inkling of mind numbing pleasure—but it was more than that. Pleasure ultimately gave way to the pain of loving someone beyond saving.
As expected you arrived at your small house to the sight of a black ship—big enough for one—in the clearing that was solely used by him. The darkness bled through the Force, encasing you in a biting cold as you walked towards the already open door. One might say the sight of him standing amidst your tiny living room was terrifying enough to run away. But you were never one to cower in fear from him and you refused to start now.
His head tilted, energy stretching out towards you through the old connection you used to have with him, and with a small smile you reached back. Twining your brilliant blue around his obsidian nature until you saw him shudder beneath his cloak.
“You’re late,” he said—his voice something you had to continue to get used to.
Humming, you dropped your robe onto the chair behind him, heading towards your small makeshift kitchen where you knew there’d be some bread from the day before. He turned, watching you move as you continued to press your Force signature against his own—reminding him of a time when he too held a blue lightsaber brighter than yours. This was a two way street. You savored the bitter sweetness of the dark side, relishing in the rush of power that flowed through your veins, and he once again fell back into what he used to know. The calming serenity of the light side.
“You’re early,” you teased, knowing his temper was far worse than before. However he always seemed to control it around you—the tight grip he had on his anger evident in the way his fist clenched.
“Where did you go?” He demanded more than asked nowadays and so you stayed silent, awaiting for the flare of anger to shove its way into your mind.
It never came though. The silence almost shocked you as you turned, eating the remainder of the bread. But that’s what he wanted out of you—a reaction that would show you actually acknowledge his presence. How could you not? When he stood there looking like the true embodiment of the dark side of the Force. Although there were times when you missed the sight of Anakin standing before you—a smile on his face that always reached his blue eyes.
“Exploring,” you said, eyes flickering down the length of him—taking in the sight of his rigid stance. “How long are you here for?”
“Tonight.”
His answers were blunt, to the point, because he didn’t have time to dawdle. You were his secret, you knew this. If anyone found out you’d be killed and knowing who Darth Vader answered to…he’d be forced to do it himself. So, you nodded and finished the remainder of your bread as you continued to watch him—prodding at the wall of his mind to hopefully see within. But they remained up, blocking you from anything other than his Force signature which remained tightly entwined with your own.
“How long will you be gone for?”
He paused, pressing against the walls of your mind to see what exactly you were thinking, but you knew he didn’t wish to forcefully tear them down. You were not a person he was interrogating—rather a lover who he may very well lose if he didn’t act accordingly. His fist clenched again, the struggle to remain in complete control now wavering as you stalled for time. He knew what you were doing and yet he still played along.
“I don’t know.”
You hummed, once more pressing against the wall in his mind. It was dangerous to be let inside—having seen what he harbored behind the thick barrier—but your curiosity always wished to drag you into trouble.
What was safety compared to intimately knowing the most lethal person in existence? To you there would be nothing more intriguing, nothing more worth the risk than this simple gesture.
“Don’t,” he spit out, stepping closer until your lower back was digging into the counter.
“You let me in once before—”
His gloved hand landed on your throat, silencing your words and causing a shudder to run down your spine. Though the position wasn’t unfamiliar, it still brought a small inkling of fear to peek its head out. He could kill you—without remorse. Yet he never did. He simply remained, holding your throat as tenderly as he possibly could—relearning what the meaning of gentle was. That thought alone brought a dazed smile to your face, your eyes nearly fluttering closed as his thumb ran along the column of your neck.
“That is no longer a luxury you are allowed to have.”
The words were sinister on his tongue, like a sharp knife to your heart, but you’d been scarred by him before. “Is it because I know what I’ll find? Or are you afraid?”
His control finally snapped, the pressure on your throat now crushing you until you struggled for air. But he didn’t squeeze harder, he didn’t make sure that you were unable to breathe completely, because he couldn’t cross that line. He refused to. You were the only light he let slip through the cracks of his helmet; the one thing keeping him stable on the ground and while it wasn’t very Darth Vader of him to keep you—it was the part of Anakin that still remained that held onto you tightly.
“You know nothing.”
Despite the lack of oxygen, you smiled. “I know you.”
The words came out choked and broken, but it was enough. He froze, his hand loosening around your throat as the final realization clicked into place just like it always did when he found his way back to you.
You knew him—knew Anakin that lay beneath the surface and Vader that rose to power crushing him in the end. You knew all the ugly bits that showed through the evident splinters of his being and in spite of all of that…you still loved him. Whenever he left you he seemed to forget that when he came here he didn’t have to wear a shroud of anger that resembled his cape. He didn’t have to wean himself from the light side with every bittersweet touch, because you held no expectations of him.
“Anakin,” you breathed, hand sliding along his leather covered limb. “Come home.”
Little by little you saw his walls come down, felt the darkness seep into his Force signature until you were surrounded by it. Until the only light left between the two of you was yours—guiding him back to you for a brief moment. He’d only be here tonight, so you’d have tonight.
You would take as much time as you were allowed if it meant seeing Anakin for a brief moment again.
“Anakin is dead,” he muttered, hand shifting until his thumb was pressing against your bottom lip. “I killed him.”
Parting your lips you allowed him to invade your senses even further—the taste of the leather permeated your mouth, driving a moan from your throat. Digging your nails into his arm, you felt him push against you—forcing his way into your mind and showing you images of a past that felt like yesterday. Anakin’s face flashed before you, the smile you ached to see again finally coming back to you, and it drew a whimper to the surface. A sound he liked if the pressure on your tongue was enough to go by.
The scene shifted and you felt the heat flare to life in your stomach as you saw yourself beneath him, sobbing his name as he practically shoved you into all encompassing bliss. Memories he still held onto—torturing himself because he could no longer have you in the way he wanted. But above all that, one stuck to the forefront of your mind. The taste of him as he kissed you; devoured everything you were and felt greedy enough to take even more.
The first hints of the dark side within him.
“Maker,” you gasped as he ripped his hand away, reaching for the ties of your robes. “I miss it too.”
Gathering enough of your energy you used the Force to shove him backwards until he stumbled into the wall behind him—his large frame taking up too much space. To anyone else it would have felt suffocating, but to you…this was as safe as you were ever going to get. He ached to have his old self back not to be a Jedi again. No, he thrived in the sinister ways of the Sith. He wanted to be Anakin, to have you again by his side—to kiss you like he used to on nights where things became too heavy a burden to carry alone.
Somehow in the midst of you pushing him back and him resisting you ended up pinned to the wall of your bedroom by him. He didn’t even have to touch you to make you beg for more; for you to do anything he wanted. This is what bending to his will became and he loved it.
He stood inches away, the tips of his boots touching yours and so like a fool you let your walls down without any warning. Shoving every memory and burning need his way until he was gasping through the modulator—his hand slamming against the wall beside your head. Each moment you were with him, each touch and night neither of you slept—too busy finding what made the other tick—it all poured into his mind. You made him see what you saw whenever you were near him even with the mask.
The cold feeling of his mask pressed against your cheek as he tried to push himself closer. This is all it would amount to. Nights spent in secret when really the both of you ached for one last thing. Something you never got.
A farewell kiss.
“Anakin,” you said softly, hand sliding to his shoulder. “Are you home?”
He let out a breath, the sound distorted through the modulator before finally breaking down the last of his walls. “Yes.”
You didn’t know how long tonight would truly last and so you began to clutch at his arm, feeling a hot press of his gloved hand dig into your thigh as he raised it to his hip. A natural movement he’d done a hundred times over. That was enough to make you smile, a small bit of laughter echoing off the walls of your tiny room. Although darkness still clung to him, still twisted tightly around your Force energy, he remained the man you loved.
Both Anakin Skywalker and Darth Vader alike.
“Tell me,” he groaned, shoving his knee up gently and fitting it right at the seam of your pants.
It almost didn’t feel fair how he knew your body so well—how he knew which way to move you to finally hear that familiar moan tumble past your lips. Grinding your hips down, your head fell back against the wall when pressure was finally applied to your throbbing clit, sending sparks down your spine. You knew he watched every emotion, expression, and heard every sound behind that helmet and somehow…that made it even more electric.
“Tell me,” he demanded, hand going back to your throat and keeping you in place as his other one guided your hips along his thigh.
Fuck, you were still clothed and felt like you would fall apart at any moment.
“I—” Moaning, your hands scrambled for purchase along his chest. “I love you.”
Placing pressure on your throat he shoved pressed his thigh upwards, watching your eyes flutter shut, a high-pitched gasp escaping you as you finally broke. Light flooded his senses, nearly breaking his stance, but the sight of you writhing in his grasp—whimpers falling from your lips was too addicting for him to let go of. They say that the dark side made one greedy; desperate for whatever they wanted, and in this moment he was prepared to take and take until you had nothing left to give.
He knew you’d let him. You would give him whatever he asked for.
“Anaki—” He cut you off, dragging you along his thigh again and watching as your face twisted. Both pain and pleasure collided as you were shoved into overstimulation.
“Again,” he said, moving his hand from your hip to your pants—helping you yank them off until the leather of his glove slid through your hot slick. “I want to see you do it again.”
“Oh fuck.”
Gasping for air, you dug your teeth into your bottom lip hard enough to draw blood as he ruthlessly began to toy with your clit. He knew exactly what to do to shove you right on that edge again and perhaps that’s what flung you over it. Or maybe it was him shoving the same words back into your own mind until it echoed over and over again.
I love you.
Sith didn’t care about things like love, but Anakin Skywalker was never truly a Sith just as he was never truly a Jedi.
He was stuck in between—crossing the border of want and need.
“I can’t.” A cry ripped from you as his other hand moved down from your neck to your chest, rubbing a thumb over your nipple. “I—Anakin I can’t.”
He chuckled, the sound menacing even to you. “Yes you can.”
This wasn’t a question—it was a choice of when you’d finally give in. The pressure in your body built, the coil twisting as he continued to rub sharp circles on your clit. When your legs began to shake and your vision became blurry from tears, you knew you were right there on the very edge of shattering, but you couldn’t. Not until he joined you on that edge—relenting his power to give you some of your own.
“Say it,” you begged, eyes screwing shut as he sunk two fingers into you right to the knuckle—his thumb continuing. “Say it for me. Please I need—I need to—”
“I love you.”
The words sounded foreign coming from his modulator, but you knew this was Anakin speaking not the twisted side of him that fed off of pain. He’d finally ripped free from the cage he was put in, leeching off the light coming from you with glee. He may not have meant the words entirely, but they did what you both intended them to do.
Sobbing his name, you felt the pressure snap in two flooding your body with a white-hot pleasure. You could hear his fingers as they continued to pump into you, rubbing against the spot along your walls that made your legs shake and tears flow down your cheeks.
“That’s it,” he muttered, hand going around your neck to hold you in place as you practically grinded on his hand—the pleasure still coursing through your veins.
You were lost to it. Mind numb to everything else but him standing before you.
It took you a few minutes to catch your breath and gain feeling in your limbs again and he waited. Gave you a chance to breathe as he fought against the impatience that trickled into his veins—a quality that was unnatural to him. Once you were finally able to open your eyes, sighing in contentment, you focused on his mind—allowing yourself a chance to see inside of it. As always it was inner turmoil that had you flinching, but right now all you saw were memories of you and him. The same ones he played over and over again while he was away from you.
“And here I thought you never missed me while you were away,” you said, lips curving into a smile sweet enough to taste.
“I don’t miss you.” He leaned closer, hand reaching down to cup your swollen cunt. “I miss this.”
Words like that should have stung, but you knew him better than that. You knew why he said the things he said. So you smiled wider, dragging his arm up until his hand was in front of your face, the black leather shiny with your cum. Twining your Force signature around him until he couldn’t escape, you sucked his fingers into your mouth, moaning at the taste of yourself. He didn’t expect you to give in so easily—usually enjoying the fight you put him through. But tonight you’d settle for this so you could gain more.
“We’ll see about that,” you whispered, kissing his palm and dropping his arm.
You wanted him to give over the control he ached for; wanted to watch as the last of his residual armor came crashing down around you. Only one person would be able to say they brought Darth Vader down to their knees and it was you. His light, his moon, his lover.
Pushing his leg away, you pressed your hands on his chest, wishing you could once again feel the strong heartbeat beneath his skin. The steady thrum of it put you to sleep on long nights when you snuck away from the Jedi Temple, but for now you’d have to settle for the rhythmic timing of his breaths as they echoed around the room.
Without another thought, you dropped to your knees in front of him—his body keeping you caged in along the wall. You figured he already knew what you were going to do, if the way he widened his stance told you anything. His hand cupped the back of your neck, tilting your gaze back towards him. It was the gentle nature of his touch that sent heat spilling into your heart. Anakin flared to life right before your eyes with every passing minute.
Undoing his belt, you allowed yourself a moment to admire what lay beneath the leather. What he always drew your attention away from. The skin was burnt, scarred beyond anything you’d ever seen before, but that never mattered to you. He stood stiff, his other hand pressed against the wall, helmet focused on you. Almost like he was unsure of what would happen.
Would you not care? Or would what remained not be what you wanted?
“Oh…” you gasped when he was finally free.
He was scarred there too, you’d felt it before. Except you weren’t shocked by that; no you were surprised by how worked up he was. The glossy sheen of precum building up at the tip practically dripped down your palm as you held him—begging for you to taste. Leaning forward, you took the head of his cock into your mouth, the guttural moan he let out sending a flare of heat through your body.
“Is this for me?” you asked sweetly, knowing it would only succeed in riling him up even more.
He grunted, his hand pushing you forward until his cock was once more back in your mouth. Although you didn’t mind in the slightest. Not when his addicting salty tang spread on your tongue the longer you sucked on the head. He was shameless with the sounds he made. Entirely focused on his pleasure, but you felt the way he softly rubbed his thumb along your neck, sending goosebumps down your skin.
“Take me deeper,” he said, already knowing you were heading that way anyways. “I know you can.”
You moaned when he hit the back of your throat, his hips thrusting forward slightly until you gagged. That alone only made him do it again. Pressing against the firm line that stood between the both of you. He wouldn’t make you do anything you didn’t want—as long as you gave him control. Something you were more than okay with handing over.
It’s not like you had any semblance of it before he became Darth Vader. Anakin had always been one to take what he deemed he deserved. Except when it came to you, he always gave you the choice. Even now as your nose brushed the base of his cock, your throat squeezing him so tight his whole body shuddered, you still held the choice.
You sucked in a breath when he pulled away, tears streaming down your cheeks and spit covering your chin. Part of you wanted to keep going—to feel him spill down your throat—but you knew that wasn’t what he was here for. Dragging you up, he pressed the cold shell of his helmet against your forehead, hands grasping your hips tightly.
“I need—” He cut himself off, a loud breath reverberating through his modulator.
For the first time that night you felt it. The small flicker of blue in his otherwise black Force signature. Only in moments like this, when his desperation practically permeated the air, did you find your Anakin.
The only thing stronger than Palpatine’s hold over him had always been the love he felt for you—that was clear to you now.
“I know,” you murmured, leading him back and watching as he sat on your bed. His large frame practically took up the entire room. He spread his legs, allowing you to step between them, but you had a different plan altogether.
Clambering onto his lap, you held yourself up as you positioned his cock at your entrance. Your slick practically pooled over him, making it easier for you to take him in one thrust. But rather than rush this, you held yourself there. Hovering over his needy and wanting cock—making him wait for the one thing he so desperately needed. The blue flickered again, vibrating through you and forcing a gasp from your lungs.
You longed to pull it closer until it enveloped you entirely; til you suffocated from its light. But whatever remained was now small and fleeting, only seen in moments like this. His grasp turned harsh, impatient. Letting you know that he only had so much left in him before he took back the small sliver of control he allotted you.
Your whole body shook as you finally lowered yourself, feeling the stretch of his cock sliding into your cunt. A growl ripped from his chest, his hands pressing you down further and watching in delight as your head fell back, a garbled shout echoing off the walls. You went dizzy with the delicious mixture of pain and pleasure. It rushed through you, setting each nerve in your body alight with a burning fire.
Which only made everything shine brighter.
Light flooded his senses, your Force signature practically bleeding out into the room. And he took it. He swallowed it whole in his never ending darkness with the hope that you were never extinguished.
“More,” you gasped, fingers digging into the leather that covered his shoulder.
He shoved his hips upward, grinding against you and tearing a sound from your chest that seared into his mind instantly. You were a wanton mess. Barely hanging on to the person you were thirty minutes ago—before he came back into your life. Instead there you were. The lover who fed off of his darkness; who took what the Jedi Order claimed was forbidden and begged for more.
“Maker—fuck—I-I’m oh fuck—” You made no sense, but that’s the way he wanted you. An incoherent babbling mess that rode his cock to chase that feeling only he could bring you.
Lifting yourself up slightly, you dropped back down haphazardly, hating the emptiness that came with his cock slipping out of you. A sound tore through his modulator, his hands tightening on your hips as you set a brutal pace. He groaned when your walls tightened around him, the sound of your skin slapping against the leather of his pants echoing in the room. If you listened closely you could hear the wet squelch of your slick as he set his own pace, pounding into you without abandon.
“Please, Anakin please,” you cried, unsure of what you were begging for.
He seemed to know though.
Without a response, his hand wrapped around your throat, pressing down tightly as he thrusted upwards even harder. The lack of oxygen seemed to only heighten the sensation you chased—pleasure building up to an almost painful degree in your body.
He bent you to his will, guiding your body in a way that felt familiar. You didn’t have to think when he was here, didn't need to focus your energy on any of this, because he did it for you. His gloved thumb pressed against your lips until you opened up with ease, sucking his finger into your mouth with a moan. It gave you a chance to take in a deep breath before he clamped down tight around your throat again. Turning your vision hazy.
“Good,” he muttered, pulling the spit slicked finger from your mouth. Only to press it firmly against your clit.
Your body arched, a broken cry falling from your lips as tears streamed down your face. It was too much, yet you couldn’t find it in yourself to ask him to stop. You didn’t want him to. The pleasure nearly blinded you with each thrust of his cock into your dripping cunt. But what made you fall wasn’t the feeling of him finally striking against the spot that made your body curl in on itself.
No, it was the image he projected in your mind.
“That’s what you like huh,” Anakin’s voice grunted in your head, his blue eyes just as bright as before.
You sobbed out a garbled yes, eyes rolling back. The image continued. A bright blue light wrapped itself around you, nearly burning you from the inside out as he pinched your clit between his fingers. And you chased it; grabbed onto the sensation tightly and let it fill your chest until you swore your heart stopped beating.
“I want you to cum. Let me see my pussy drip for me,” he spit, dragging you closer until you were pressed so tight it nearly hurt.
“Don’t,” you gasped, shoving the image of Anakin away from your mind, eyes focusing on the empty soulless black mask he wore. His hand let up slightly, allowing you breath to speak. “I want to see you. Not him.”
Warmth spread through your chest when his hips stuttered, a groan reverberating against your breast. You wished you could kiss him. Feel the hot press of his lips on yours, but this—feeling him thrust into you quickly—was enough. His hand tightened again as his cock drove up into you harshly, hitting right where you needed to fly off the edge. Your mouth fell open, a broken sob making its way through as the all encompassing heat you so desired began to spill through your body.
A snarl ripped through your very being when he finally joined you, spurting into your swollen cunt and filling you until you leaked around the base of him. Except he didn’t stop. He pushed forward, thrusting into you until pain filtered through the pleasure. Once more you were shoved into that bliss, drowning in it with no way out.
Sobbing his name, you felt your body shake as he finally ceased his movements, allowing you to sag against him. The energy was completely depleted from you and he knew it. Which is why he didn’t move. Simply breathed deeply, his softening cock still deep in you, causing you to moan slightly at every soft twitch.
“How long until you have to go?” you sighed, your fingers tracing random shapes against his armor.
“Soon.”
“Will you come back?”
You knew you wouldn’t receive an answer. You never did, because even he didn’t know when Palpatine would finally release him again from his grasp. He let out a breath, his hands cupping your ass as he molded you to him. The blue light still flickered amidst the darkness, turning his once bleak Force signature a brilliant midnight color. And for a moment you saw the real him. The man who lay beyond the layers of his armor.
Laying a kiss against the cold shell of his mask, you allowed yourself a moment to be enveloped by him. The darkness would return eventually, wiping away the man who sat beneath you. But for now, he was here and he was yours.
Smiling, you pressed against it with your own, feeling him shudder beneath you. It was like looking at the night sky—a sight you wanted to keep until you were left alone once more. Curling around his body, you allowed sleep to finally overtake you, your mind soothed by the soft touch of the Force he pressed against you.
Only then did you realize.
In the small space of your home, beneath the strain of a galaxy under siege, your Anakin finally found his way home again.
#darth vader x f!reader#darth vader x reader#darth vader x you#darth vader x y/n#darth vader smut#darth vader#anakin skywalker x f!reader#anakin skywalker x reader#anakin skywalker x you#anakin skywalker smut#star wars fic#my writing
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In Born a Sith, how would Vader react if another Vampire (not Palpatine) tried to hurt/ kill/ kidnap/ harm Luke?
Vader sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. The Archives were useless. He had hoped to find something, anything, that might help him with Luke. But there was nothing about Sith children. There were pages full of how a Sith should wait until a prospective apprentice is older before they took the vow and were turned. But nothing about if a child was turn. He found it hard to believe it had never happened before.
He carried his books back to the front desk.
“No luck?”
Vader only glared at Jocasta Nu. She had been a Jedi, a holy knight and sworn enemy of the Sith. She should be dead like the rest of her filth, but she had turned traitor before Vader had slaughtered the knights. So she was not at the temple during the massacre. She had been spared and turned. He hadn’t bothered to remember her Sith name.
“I have a theory,” she said smoothly. “That perhaps changing a child is too dangerous and ends in death. Your son survived because his change was started in the womb. He was born already half Sith.”
Vader gave her a curt nod and was about to leave, but she spoke up again.
“I am not one for gossip, Lord Vader,” she said. “But I saw Darth Liveed flying out towards your palace at the noon bell—“
He didn’t wait to hear what else she had to say. He was storming out of the Archives. It was nothing. A coincidence. Liveed was merely flying that direction … There was nothing else in that direction. Vader’s palace was on the other side of the mountains from Coruscant. It sat next to the mouth of the Metellos River where it met the sea. The Empire’s main military and naval base was located there which Vader oversaw and commanded. And Liveed was not a Sith under Vader’s command. He was not associated with the military. So why was he …
Devastator wasn’t rules when Vader arrived at the dragon barn. Vader strokes her about to soothe her while the attendants saddled her up. She could sense his anger and irritation. She was ready to fight. When the attendants were done, Vader climbed on and they took off. Vader did not need to give any command to make haste to his palace. Devastator already knew.
— — — —
Luke sat at his small desk in his father’s study. Father was currently away at the capital but should return before night. Perhaps if Luke made good progress, he could ask if Father would take him to see the dragons. It had been some time since Luke had seen the dragons. It was one of his few joys he found here.
He heard the sound of heavy boots marching down the hallway. Luke perked up to look like he was deep in thought, but he wasn’t actually reading the words in his book. A chill ran up his back and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. There was a tightness in his chest. Why was he feeling this?
The steps were approaching, and that was when Luke realized the steps weren’t . . . right. He knew the sound of his father’s boots. These steps were too close together. Not heavy enough. Luke turned in his seat just in time to see a figure enter the study. It was not his father.
It was a man. He was tall and lean with black hair and odd dull tan skin. He wore black leather tunics that were layered across his chest in a V-shape. A silver sword hilt with no blade hung on his belt. A crooked smile grew slowly on his lips as he looked at Luke.
“Well, well. Here is the little Vader brat. I was expecting something more, but I see now. You’re just a small scrawny rat,” the man said.
Luke slowly stood up. The man walked to the room, or it was more like he slinked into the room like a predator. Golden eyes flickered in the candlelight. His smile showed off two pointed fangs. He was a Sith. He had never met another Sith before.
The Sith stopped a small distance from Luke. Luke pressed himself against his desk. The wooden edge digging into his back. The Sith was still smiling as he loomed over the boy. Then quick as a viper, his hand snatched out and grabbed Luke’s chin. His cold fingers dug into the skin. It hurt, and so Luke tried to pull away. The fingers dug deeper into his skin.
“Look at me,” the Sith hissed. Luke did. The black in the eyes were like slits. “You . . . You are the prince? Third in line to the throne? You?” The fingers were digging in deeper. Luke could feel his skin being sliced open. The smell of blood instantly filled the air. “How pathetic,” he spat.
His hand ripped away and Luke’s hand jerked to the side. Luke whimpered and brought a hand up to his face and gently pressed his fingers against the new weeping wounds. His fingers were wet with his blood.
The Sith let out a sharp laugh that sounded like a bark. “It is a shame the others didn’t join me. They would have loved to see this . . . THIS child! Maybe I should take you back to the capital? Hmmm? You’ve never seen the throne you have a claim to? Shall we go see it?”
Luke tried to move away, but the Sith grabbed his arm. Luke yelped as the grip tightened.
“I will enjoy throwing you at the feet of our Emperor and watch as his face contorts into sweet disappointment. No wonder Vader has been hiding you. Now come.”
The Sith pulled Luke out of the room and down the hall. The boy looked around for guards, for a servant, for anyone or anything. But there was no one. The Sith’s grip was iron tight and cold. He recognized the path they were taken. They were going to the dragons. Tears built up in his eyes. He didn’t like this.
The door blew open without the Sith even touching it. He could use the Force. The wind was cold and sharp as they walked onto the balcony. Luke could see the stone bridge that connected the palace to the dragon caves. However, there was a dragon already on the balcony. It was already saddled and let out a screech as they approached. The dragon looked odd. It looked like a TIE dragon, but it a bit smaller and more of a light grey than the ones he was used to seeing. Luke tried to pull away, tried to wiggle free, but like his father, the Sith held tight. They had just reached the dragon when a loud screech filled the air.
A shadow fell over them. There was the flapping of wings. The Sith’s dragon pulled away from them. It’s head reared back and hissing as another, much larger dragon descended upon it. Teeth and claws dug into the smaller dragon. Red blood spilled on the stone tile.
“Liveed!” a voice shouted.
Luke looked up to see a figure descending from the heavens. His father landed with a solid thump, his sword in hand and already the blade was burning red. His teeth were bared and his fangs were long.
“Vader!” the Sith said as he pulled out his own hilt. A red blade hummed out of it. “I came to meet the little prince! Little is an apt description.”
Vader’s eyes lingered on Luke. Then they darted up to Liveed. He growled, “I will you give this one chance. Let my son go.”
Liveed threw Luke aside, and the boy fell to the ground. Vader wasted no time. He charged forward, his blade swinging, and Liveed’s blade met it. The blades hummed and hissed as they struck against it. Luke crawled away towards the palace. He grabbed at the thick door and pulled himself up. He twisted around just in time to see his father pushing his red blade into Liveed’s chest. The other Sith was wide-eyed with terror as the blade went deeper and deeper.
The body slunk to the floor, and Liveed’s blade flickered out. The hilt fell from his hand and clinked against the tile. Vader barely paused as he pulled the blade out and stomped over to Luke. Luke whimpered and squeezed his eyes shut. He could feel his father’s rage. It burned but it was cold. A sharp searing cold that grew closer and closer.
“Luke,” Vader said. His voice the same as always. Deep and booming. “Luke. Look at me.”
Luke curled up in a tight ball. He felt a hand on his back. A hand grabbed his arm. But it wasn’t the tight steel he was used to. It was gentle as Vader pulled Luke to him. Large arms wrapped around him, but Vader’s body was still tense. Still hard.
“It’s ok, Luke,” Vader said softly. “It’s ok.”
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Top 10 Star Wars Movies
There have been few media franchises as popular as Star Wars but how have the movies fared with critics? Here are my 10 best Star Wars Films
#10) Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
Nevertheless, for all its blemishes, the movie pushed the series further into the future and beyond the technological limitations of the time, creating a launchpad into the universe's 'Clone Wars' side which has spun off into its own thing.
#9) Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace
I understand why people say The Phantom Menace gets a whole lot wrong. There's Jake Lloyd's unfortunatley annoying performance as Anakin (but still cute); there are multiple alien designs that are vaguely racist caricatures; Jar-Jar Binks exists. Yet, there are also some really great elements to Episode 1 that should not be overlooked.
Regardless of your feelings towards the Gungans, Naboo's verdant rainforests, Atlantean underwater cities, and utopian palaces serve as gorgeous backdrops that expand the Star Wars universe. The podracing scene is a fun take on Ben-Hur's timeless chariot race. And the grand finale lightsaber duel is phenomenal. Darth Maul and his double-bladed lightsaber versus Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan is easily one of the greatest fight scenes in the entire series.
#8) Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker
The last Star Wars movie and one of the more generally divisive, The Rise of Skywalker brought the sequel trilogy to a messy conclusion that satisfied some fans while leaving others wanting.
Despite the typically brilliant work done on effects and design, the movie's celebration of the franchise itself ultimately wasn't enough to enthuse those who felt it was either a step backward from the previous installment or too far gone into a more generic Hollywood formula.
#7) Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
The first spinoff of Disney's reign of Star Wars, Rogue One was, while still not without its own controversies, a much bigger hit at the box office than Solo.
Critics seem to agree that, while more a fun detour in the franchise's history than anything else, its origin story for the events of the original movie is more entertaining than its gloomy aesthetic suggests.
#6) Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens
After the mixed results of the prequel trilogy, both fans and critics were overjoyed with J.J. Abrams' first Star Wars movie.
Essentially a remake of the original movie, The Force Awakens was a light and frothy action spectacle that may come to be viewed in a harsher light over time but nonetheless delivered on what audiences really wanted from the franchise at that moment.
#5) Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith
The most generally well-received entry in the prequel trilogy with both fans and critics alike, Revenge of the Sith brought George Lucas' vision for Star Wars full circle in an ambitious and impactful way. Knowing exactly how most of the main characters end up made the story no less tragic and Lucas' political commentary, whilst heavy-handed, wasn't without its relevance.
#4) Star Wars: Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
The finale of the original trilogy certainly has its faults, as reflected by its position in the critical rankings, but, like Attack of the Clones, it was a fittingly big technological step forward for both the franchise and movies in general.
Even if you're not a fan of the infamous Ewoks, Return of the Jedi delivers a satisfying conclusion to the long-running feud between hero Luke Skywalker and villain Darth Vader, which has only improved over time in the face of future movies undermining its impact.
#3) Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi
As much a remake of Empire Strikes Back as The Force Awakens is to the original movie, Rian Johnson's take on the franchise's core elements also added its fair share of ideas to the mix and that's perhaps part of the reason why there ended up being such a huge divide between one very enthusiastic side made up of critics and fans and one vitriolically hateful side made up of a faction of other fans.
At any rate, the movie sits with the most widely loved entries in the franchise as the debate surrounding it rages on, and, like The Force Awakens again, its evaluation over time will be fascinating to watch.
#2) Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope
The original classic is one of the few movies in existence that truthfully has had all that can be said about it already said.
The movie that would eventually come to be known as A New Hope remains one of cinematic history's biggest landmarks and an essentially perfect adventure story. If you've still never seen it then fans and a vast majority of critics agree that you're missing out on a monumental experience.
#1) Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
It's easy to see why Empire Strikes Back is so often floated as the best movie of the franchise, with its darker and more haunting tone that's emphasized by its striking look. Virtually flawless. This is the Star Wars equivalent of Casablanca. Directed by Irvine Kirshner, produced by Gary Kurtz with a screenplay in part by Lawrence Kasdan (in other words, not George Lucas), this has the best dialogue, the deepest characterisation, the most compelling story and the best individual moments of the lot: the Millennium Falcon flying into the asteroid field, Han being frozen in carbonite, Luke and Darth Vader fighting amid the industrial gloom of the freezing chamber with the iconic line “I am your father!”, Chewbacca roaring at Vader (a big deal). As well as the main plot twist, which need not be repeated here, there is also the sight of Vader kneeling before the previously unseen Emperor (also a big deal). And it has Boba Fett.
Honorable Mentions: Solo: A Star Wars Story and Star Wars: The Clone Wars
Well, that’s it for today’s post, thanks for reading! And don’t forget to tell me your favorite comebacks so far and/or if you like any of these films. May the Force be with you.
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Can you please have Lotor and the paladins watch Into the Spiderverse and/or Star Wars? I'd love to hear his reactions to Earth's theories of multiple dimensions and space travel before it was known to be possible. (As well as the "I am your father" plot twist!)
Movie Time With TSLLotor – Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) Edition
“No.” Lotor’s slit eyes widened as he stared at the screen.His jaw dropped slightly. And then he raised his hand to the holographicinterface to pause Star Wars: EmpireStrikes Back. “No, that is not possible.”
Pidge sat next to him. She pushed her finger against his jawto click his fangs shut. “It totally is.”
Lotor blinked. “Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father?” he askedincredulously. “The hero is the son of the villain?”
“Yeah. Pretty cool, huh?”
The prince’s elfin ears pulled back, his face tight in a mixof delight and validation. “The hero is the sonof the villain. They both use this…same force that flows through all, butyet Skywalker uses it for good.”
“Yeah, cause he’s still the good guy,” Pidge said with ashrug. “Doesn’t matter where he came from.”
To Lotor’s left, one Princess Allura still sat in horror,her hands covering her mouth, her beautiful eyes wide. “Ngh,” she squeaked,still staring at Luke’s missing hand. “Keith, you didn’t tell me there wasgoing to be dismemberment.”
On the floor, one Keith lay on his side, delightedlymunching on popcorn. “It’s not like it shows much. I mean, this was the 1980s. Specialeffects were still kinda bad.”
Allura looked down and lightly nudged Keith with her foot indisapproval. “But I like Luke,” shewhined. “And his own father just cut off his hand—that is so cruel andterrible.”
“…It’s awesome,” Keith argued.
“It’s terrible,” she retorted right back, her white browsknitting together. “Honestly, Keith, where is your sense of empathy?”
His lips stretched as he turned to stare up at her. “Takinga nap.”
“Obviously.” And then she tossed some popcorn at him, whichhe jerked to the side and caught it with his mouth.
Allura’s elfin ears flicked in interest of his reflexes, andso she did it again, tossing a popcorn kernel at him, which he caught onceagain in his mouth, crunching down on the popcorn in satisfaction. His eyesglinted merrily.
That managed to garner the attention of Kosmo, who ploddedover to sniff Keith’s face. Then he licked the boy’s mouth in interest of thepopcorn salt. Keith sputtered out a noise between a laugh and a gag as heraised up his hand to gently push Kosmo’s muzzle away. The space wolf lickedhis cheek in response, wagging his tail.
Allura giggled at the sight and turned to Lotor.
The man was still puzzling over the movie’s various aspects,murmuring to Pidge in awe and surprise, “—Particularly advanced for a culturehaving traveled off-planet only several decaphoebs before, capturing not onlythe power but also the mundane quality of space travel. It is so very rare forcivilizations not to worship or otherwise present space travel as a means of obtaininggodhood.”
The girl shrugged. “I mean, our rocket that got us to themoon, the Saturn V, was said to be made of parts from the lowest bidder, andeven the astronauts got tired of talking about the moon after a couple ofdecades. As a species, I’d say we get bored pretty easily. The new wears offfast, you know?”
Lotor raised his hand to point at her. “That is preciselywhat I mean. Contextualization of advancement. Most early civilizations likeyour own would worship space travel in a spiritual sense, and yet even yourlanguage about real events—like your Saturn V and first trip to Earth’s moon—delegatessuch to the realm of the everyday. The exponential learning curve of humans,and your emotional response as a species, is quite fascinating.”
“You saying we’re freaks or something?”
“Just…strangely aware. Even the concept of the Force is surprisingto me. It is rudimentary in description,” Lotor continued, brows knitted togetherin thoughtfulness, “but particularly reminiscent of quintessence—down to itsability to be manipulated by people of all moral alignments. Tell me, does this…StarWars represent humanity’s reigning philosophy of the essence of life?”
Pidge pushed up her glasses in pride. “Actually, the ideabehind the Force is very old. Even early humans believed there was somethingthat tied all living beings together. The names for it changed—ancient humanscalled it the fifth element. Medieval scholars even called it quintessence fora time.”
Lotor’s head tilted in interest. “And what do humans call itnow?”
“Our most equivalent theory would be dark matter—but westill can’t really do anything with it like you or Allura can.”
The prince looked down at his own fingers and allowed themto spark to life with a slight glow of purple. “Dark matter seems to suggest apeculiar obscurity, but it is quite visible to me.”
Pidge dared to grab onto one of his hands, inspecting theglow his fingertips with a scientific curiosity. “They say dark matter is acollection of stars that haven’t ignited or they’ve already exploded, leaving pocketsof energy across the universe. Somehow, you and Allura tap into that unignitedenergy and manifest it for yourself.” Her thin brows furrowed. “But the energyisn’t hot like a star, and I’m not sure how you…channel it.”
Lotor’s voice lifted in delight of a lecture, his eyesbright and face glowing with the awe of human entertainment, which allowed forsons of villains to be heroes. “It is all a matter of being attuned tosurrounding frequencies. But your movie would suggest that quintessencemanifests itself on a spectrum aligned to some moral perception. Blue for good.Red for evil. In truth, the color depends on the frequency or concentration ofthe energy.” He turned to Allura, who was watching them with great curiosity. “Princess,can you help me demonstrate this?”
“Of course,” she murmured happily. She snapped her fingers,and within her palm manifested a glowing light, the same color as Lotor’s. “Purpleis of a high concentration and frequency—only trained alchemists or those withinnate ability can manifest such. There is no moral alignment for it, although Galran-minedquintessence takes on this spectrum per the attempts to gatherless-concentrated quintessence into something more.” Her hand turned, and theglow suddenly turned red. “This color, as I’m sure you know, Pidge, has a lower,more enduring frequency and so is found most readily in planets.” Then Allura’s hand twitched as she narrowed her eyes. The color of her fingertipsbegan to glow blue. “This is of a similar frequency. And the highest frequencyappears as pure black, which is the totality of all quintessence spectrumsabsorbed within the power itself.” Her full lips twitched in a sad way as theglow died about her fingertips. “But I will not show you here, for I do notwish to draw attention from those who would sense its power.”
Her words were a thinly veiled reference to the witch Haggar.
Her eyes flickered to Lotor’s, and he searched her.
Pidge cut between them. “Wait, wait,” she said, narrowingher eyes. “Pure quintessence is black?” Her lips stretched. “As in, dark matter?”
Lotor did not look away from Allura, his voice distant evenas he managed a twitch of his lips. “Perhaps human theories are not so far fromthe truth, then.” The glow died from his hands as well. “Though I will admit, Ihave never been able to attempt such a concentration.”
“Perhaps one day,” Allura murmured softly, “I could show youhow to achieve manifesting black quintessence.”
The prince smiled at her, his eyes glimmering. “I would lovefor you to show me the darkness, princess.” And then his smile stretchedfarther. “As long as it does not require becoming a Sith lord.”
Keith raised his hand. “Siths are cooler than Jedi, just saying.”
Pidge rolled her eyes. “No way. The Jedi are so much moreawesome. Also, they have green light sabers.”
“And Siths have red,” Keith argued lightly. “Why do you thinkI like them?”
Allura giggled. Then she turned to Lotor and murmured, “I donot believe you will have to become a Sith lord to achieve mastery ofquintessence.”
“Then what must I become, princess?”
“My padawan,” she giggled, reaching up to pat his head.
Lotor’s face-faulted, then huffed in a mix of misery andgreat amusement. Here he was, ten-thousand years old and still an apprentice. “Oneday,” he said, voice straining, “I hope to become your equal.”
The words inspired a bloom of a blush upon Allura’s face asher fingers slipped from his hair, which was soft against her skin. “I would verymuch like that.”
He smoothed down his hair where she had displaced it. “And ifyou were to teach me, I would assure you that I would use such knowledge responsiblyas well, even though I am the son of your enemy.” He tilted his chin to the moviescreen. “None of this dark-side domination.”
She lightly grabbed onto his hand and squeezed his largepalm. “You are not your parents, as I am not mine.”
His long, clawed fingers squeeze against her own to reciprocatethe touch. His sharp cheeks flushed in a manner similar to Allura’s—an awe atbeing near a kindred spirit.
“…Hey, can you guys stop flirting,” Keith cut in with a deadpan,“so can we finish the movie?”
#Movie Time with TSL Lotor#The Second Law#Lotor#Lotura#Allura#Keith#Pidge#ahh omg science invaded#as did history#i really enjoyed this prompt#I wonder if Lotor would like Star Wars or Star Trek better#Just imagine this bab outlining the merits of both and puzzling over which he likes more#my writings
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Hello! I was wondering if you've seen The Last Jedi and if you have, any opinions on it. Thanks!
I have seen it! Thanks for asking! :) Heads up, in case people missed my first comment on it the day it came out, I don’t have an enthusiastic perspective toward The Last Jedi. I don’t dislike the film, but it also didn’t grip me. It’s ��okay”. So for those of you who are looking for an excited buddy to scream with, I am not your person. But if you are looking at having a fun, thoughtful discussion about the pros and the cons of the film, I am happy to do so with you.
In truth, I think one of the things I enjoy most about the new Star Wars trilogy is the discussion coming out of them. I was at a party a few days ago where we all got into such a long, deep, fascinating, and passionate discussion that we had to pass around a key, and whoever held the key could talk, and everyone else had to listen; we all had that many opinions on it, and it was cool to hear. There were many things we agreed with, other things we didn’t, but everyone’s perspective in the conversation was uber cool. I love that. I love to discuss the new SW movies more than watch them!
I can’t go into every thought I have on the movie now, but I’m happy to share some overarching thoughts! Ya’ll are free to ask for more specifics or opinions on certain things with TLJ, of course!
Note: there are spoilers in the commentary below!
Plot in TLJ
Personally for me I felt as though the plot were strangely scaffolded. Maybe I’ll alter my opinion following a second viewing. But what I felt was that the plot was more cartilaginous than something with good backbone. Rather than having sound structure, with clearly defining points, it had a strange flowing, river-like structure that didn’t altogether convince me.
There were also some unnecessarily long parts to the plot. I’ve seen this mentioned two billion and five hundred sixty three point four times already, but I do agree with it: the casino run with Finn and Rose, while having some charm, was unnecessarily long compared to how it needed to be told. Technically story-wise you could have cut about ninety percent of it and lost little of what needed to be overarchingly told.
I also think the drama with Holdo was unnecessarily complicated and tangled. Simple communication could have solved three plot twists. While there is totally feasible reason to withhold information, the writers never demonstrated that reason, thus leaving it all contorted.
Another big plot gap is something people have talked about a lot: Snoke dying without us knowing anything about him. Some of my friends have talked about how this can have a deep philosophical meta meaning, how it illuminates that we as viewers expect villains and villains of a certain vein, and get caught off-guard when it doesn’t happen that way, etc. But personally for me I feel as though it’s shaky writing. Viewers shouldn’t come away with so little satisfaction about a character who was meant to be a contending force; if the viewers leave like that, it means the execution - whatever the intent - was unsuccessful.
So the truth is, Snoke died without us knowing ANYTHING about this character. Where did he come from? What were his motivations? What’s his background, his… anything? He’s just this vague villain bad Sith guy that Kylo has killed and that’s it. Is there more to this villain that we can show without getting into the books and extended universe material? They really should have given us more by this point in time in the story. They can rectify it through Episode XI, but at the moment, it’s shaky plot-writing ground.
Originality of TLJ
One of the big criticisms of TFA (something I constructively criticized myself) was that it rehashed the plot of A New Hope. Lots of people now seem disjointed because TLJ seems so original - or at least, that’s what I’ve heard from many people. TLJ being more original was refreshing for me.
I would say that it is original enough and that is good. Nevertheless, it’s still not as out-in-the-blue as I’ve seen some other companions of mine claim. In both TLJ and Empire, we have: 1). A rebel base being cornered; rebels having to fight; rebels having to flee, 2). A powerful, Force-sensitive young individual seeking out a Jedi recluse for training and assistance, 3). That Force-sensitive individual receiving some training after resistance, but ultimately making choices the Master finds questionable, 4). Characters being chased by ship by their enemies while the good guys’ ship(s) are in poor quality and need repairs, fuel, etc., 5). The characters go to a well-to-do location to find someone to help them in their rebel efforts, but that assistant turns out to be a traitor and turn them in to the Empire/First Order, and…. yeah. There are still lots of parallels to be made between TLJ and Episode V.
Another thing one of my friends pointed out is that many audience members might feel confused because TLJ ends in an analogous point to not The Empire Strikes Back… but Return of the Jedi. For ROTJ is when Luke is tempted to join the Dark Side and Darth Vader kills his master. We see that parallel with Kylo Ren and Snoke and Rey. But if we’ve already had that big plot event from ROTJ in the middle chapter of the new series… what’s next? That could be a reason why many people are thrown off by what was done in Episode VIII.
But personally for me, the ending material in Episode VIII was the best. The three scenes that stand out to me are: 1). The silent moment, 2). Luke being a badass in front of Kylo, and 3). Kylo killing Snoke, Kylo and Rey fighting together, but Kylo stilling holding onto the Dark Side and taking Snoke’s position. Those were all good moments that I quite like.
Oh. And the visuals. I loved the visuals throughout the movie. Very aesthetically well-done film.
Characterization in TLJ
Characters ranged from really well-written to… the writers randomly flapping hands.
Poe and Kylo Ren were great highlights to me. I found them to be very well-written, founded on good motivations and well-established character. I do feel as though Kylo Ren is one of the more complex characters, who has layers of reasons and emotions, so every decision he makes is well-founded with who he is. And every scene with Poe was one that I appreciated.
Rose was good and what they did with her writing-wise works, and technically you don’t need more background or anything with her… but I would have liked more. I have seen some criticisms on Rose and understand the validity of those; I moreof am saying that Rose as a character is written consistently, with fun personality, and with some fun interest. I liked her on screen. Sniffed out the romance plot a while away and don’t think it was necessary-necessary, but don’t mind it either, because of course that happened, like it does with every other movie out there.
Finn’s characterization was… like the last movie… very rough. Poorly defined. Haphazard. Inconsistent. Wild writer hands flapping willy nilly. John Boyega’s good acting covers that up as well as it can, and makes Finn “feel” like a consistent character. But if you actually look at his choices and motivations across the two films, there is very little pattern, rhyme, or reason to it. Finn is a nice character when you don’t analyze him, though, so I wish that they’d done a better job with his personality and personality arc. That character deserves to be written well.
Now. For Luke. I agree with Mark Hamill on this one. Luke’s characterization was given justification and reasoning, and I get what they were trying to do, but… I don’t think it works. One reason it doesn’t work is that Luke has already learned the lessons he was struggling with in TLJ: he was tested by Yoda for the Dark Side and failed, he saw that someone turned to the Dark could be restored, he saw that giving up would never lend good results, and on and on and on. These aren’t just lessons that he’d need to relearn, but things smashed into the core of Luke’s personality and philosophy and core. And Luke’s struggle is very obviously working against a lot of common sense, which Rey delivers in a few sentences, and then Luke starts being turned to being convinced (there is a slow turn for him, but still). And lots of this goes against most of what we know about Luke’s established character, even when we consider how peoples’ personalities and views change over time. Last.. Luke’s internal conflict felt very unrealistic for his age and maturity. That sort of struggle he was going through I’ve seen lots of people in their mid twenties already have a firm grasp and understanding of. I shouldn’t be out-wising Luke Skywalker. I’m twenty-five.
That said, Mark’s acting was altogether fun and compelling to watch. He delivered very well.
Overarching Opinion
Personally I never felt “caught up” in the excitement of the movie - not that there wasn’t action, but I couldn’t get invested enough to worry or be pulled in. There was never a point where I was grumpy or angry at the movie… just didn’t get dragged into the adventure. It’s one of those movies that I came out of feeling it was “okay” but not astounding. I don’t dislike the movie and I’m not in the wave of complainers or haters or anything. It’s just not something that clicked greatly with me. There were some scenes I quite liked, some elements I quite liked, and lots of things that I’ll always love to debate about. It’s just not the movie that was made-made for me.
#long post#non-dragons#SW#TLJ#tlj spoilers#The Last Jedi#Star Wars#analysis#my analysis#ask#ask me#awesome anonymous friend#anonymous
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But @allronix, the sole reason why Luke didn't end up killing his father in anger, fear, hate and aggression, because follows Yoda and Obi-Wan's guidance. I wrote about this in detail:
That's the whole point of the Original Trilogy: Luke Skywalker succeeds where Anakin Skywalker failed in the Prequels and by doing so, he saves his father by not falling to the dark side, understanding and following Yoda's teachings.
Your interpretations are generally centering around this theme: “loyalty to and love for impersonal, faceless, cold institutions versus loyalty to and love for flesh and blood people.” And in your reading, the younglings are taken from their families so they will be loyal to and they will love an institution, but not individual people, and the Force, which is defined by you in a way that is consistent with Knights of the Old Republic II but not with the six movies and the Clone Wars tv show. But I can't locate this theme in Star Wars.
Obi-Wan takes baby Luke to Tatooine to his uncle and aunt so he will be safe and hidden from Darth Vader and the Emperor, this is also very clear in Episode III. How this relates to the younglings being taken to the Jedi Temple very young, so they can be trained? And what supports the idea that Obi-Wan did this so Luke won't be loyal to his blood relations and can kill his own father without hesitation? Nor I can see, why Yoda would tell Obi-Wan, "To his family send him" if he wants Luke to have this "Order becomes Mother and Father" mentality and how his family raising him could be the best substitute to it? How this would help the alleged goal, to create a situation where "he has no one to love, nothing to lose, and his loyalty is only to the Force and the Order, then he will be the perfect weapon and tool to accomplish what needs to be accomplished for the good of the galaxy - dead Sith"? Unless we want to ascribe to the notion - but I won’t do that and frankly, I am pretty confident that this is not what you suggest - that there is a kind of loyalty, care, affection, warmth and love that is exclusive to individuals who are related by blood, this is not making sense to me.
Also, in Episode V, there is no sign of Yoda and Obi-Wan trying to instill this kind of mentality into Luke, or trying to bring forth the aforementioned situation. All what Yoda and Obi-Wan are saying is actually "You must finish your training, you're not ready, and you're walking into a trap, this is exactly what they want. You don't know what will happen, no one can foresee that, but it's damn sure that if you go now, without the proper training that you need to be able to defeat Vader and the Emperor, you risk everything your friends fight and suffer for. Everything depends on stopping Vader and the Emperor, so be patient. Think how you can serve them best. And if you honor what they fight for, a galaxy freed from the Empire, then yes, you stay, you train yourself to be able to save the galaxy, even if this might mean sacrificing them, at least for now." And Luke is like: "Yeah, yeah I know but I will go anyway."
And this is the intended narrative. I can't say, where and how it failed to execute Lucas' intention:
"It’s pivotal that Luke doesn’t have patience. He doesn’t want to finish his training. He’s being succumbed by his emotional feelings for his friends rather than the pratical feelings of “I’ve got to get this job done before I can actually save them. I can’t save them, really.” But he sort of takes the easy route, the arrogant route, the emotional but least practical route, which is to say, “I’m just going to go off and do this without thinking too much.” And the result is that he fails and doesn’t do well for Han Solo or himself."- George Lucas
"It’s the motif that needs to be in the picture, but it’s one of those things that just in terms of storytelling was very risky because basically he screws up, and everything turns bad. And it’s because of that decision that Luke made on [Dagobah] to say “I know I’m not ready, but I’m going to go anyway.” - George Lucas
“Luke is making a critical mistake in his life of going after- to try to save his friends when he’s not ready. There’s a lot being taught here about patience and about waiting for the right moment to do whatever you’re going to do.” And “Luke is in the process of going into an extremely dangerous situation out of his compassion— Without the proper training, without the proper thought, without the proper foresight to figure out how he’s gonna get out of it. His impulses are right, but his methodology is wrong.” - George Lucas
I assume - and I apologize in advance if I’m wrong - your reading has its origins in the idea that blood relations and personal relationships are falling under the definition of "attachment", forbidden for a Jedi Knight. But this has simply no basis: there is no real reason to believe that Jedi Knights are against familial bonds and in Clone Wars, we actually see twin sister Jedi Masters. In Legends, there are also many Jedi Knights who are actually related by blood. The idea that emotional component of the blood relationship is something that the Jedi frown upon is also not holding up, as we can clearly see that the parent-child bond is replicated in the bond between the Jedi Master and the Padawan, and whenever a Jedi Knight describes their relationship to their master, they say, they were the closest to or like a parent to them. Even if one resorts to the glossary of modern psychology, we find that “attachment” is not synonymous with love, it’s not the descriptor of parent-child relationships, and it’s clear that Jedi Knights are forming the discriminated, preferential intimate relationships, involving receiving and giving love, affection, comfort, protection called “attachments” in Western psychology.
So, I'm confused, what supports the interpretation you proposed? Where it is evidenced in the source material? And how that interpretation takes compassion versus attachment into account?
As for your fic, I didn't read it, but someday I would love to - It would certainly help me to get more familiar with your perspective on the Force. It seems to me that you shaped your Force into an entity of cosmic horror, which seems to be Knights of the Old Republic cosmology...?
What pisses me off sometimes is that many of the people in this fandom already understand attachment but just choose to not use that understanding for the Jedi.
Like. If you weren’t completely confused by Shuri’s arc in the new Black Panther you understand attachment.
If you understood why elenore let chidi leave in the finale of the good place, you understand attachment.
In fact I can think of like eight super hero movies where attachment (and learning to let go of it) is the KEY conflict.
Attachment is not a hard concept to grasp at all. “Letting go” is NEVER portrayed as a bad thing in media. Like. Never. Especially when it’s about letting go of a loved one who died instead of getting revenge.
When people watch a super hero movie and the super hero starts acting like a villain and a side character goes “you’ve got to let her go” I never find paragraphs on tumblr about how the hero should have kept acting like a villain and that side character was the real bad guy.
It’s just that the Jedi don’t struggle with it. The Jedi already practice attachment. They’re already at peace. And since Anakin has been a Jedi for so long and has given no real indication of struggling (I mean they don’t know about his secret wife), they just tell him to practice attachment and think that’s enough. Bc he should already know.
And when people say they shouldn’t have expected this of Anakin bc he wasn’t raised a Jedi… the Jedi are not the only ones who don’t act on attachment. The first person to explain attachment in the movies is Shimi Skywalker. She lets Anakin go and live a better life bc she is not attached to him. She tells him to not look back. This is the woman who raised Anakin. He was raised in a no-attachment household. He has no excuse. He was always taught about attachment. He knew what he was doing was wrong. He did it anyway.
Anakin was not confused by attachment. And neither is the audience really. There are so many stories about how attachment is bad, Lucas just calls it by its name. People choose not to like the Jedi bc they don’t find them interesting. Which is fine I suppose, but if you don’t like the Jedi bc the sith aesthetic is more your speed, just say that. Stop pretending you don’t understand a very common moral conflict.
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Anakin literally murdered Padme. And he still died a hero, forgiven by his son.
#star wars#you come into my house you dare disrespect my giant dumbass cyborg murderer like this#i'm kidding i can see why#but like at this point it is too early in the game for me to really say anything about kylo ren's possible redemption#we don't even know anything about him! he's the worst kind of vader fanboy#that's literally it.#he COULD change but it doesn't make the things he did go away#it didn't work that way for anakin#i need to add that i do not hold any hatred against kylo ren's fans#i just don't like him v much at this point#it could change! maybe! if we have more information.#but we have nothing so far so.
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@bchemianrhapscdy
Vader or Anakin, whoever he was this week, still didn’t always feel like he and Padme were on the same page. Did they have sex sometimes? Okay, they had sex frequently. They had children. But, there still felt like they had a hard time connecting, sometimes. He had to tell her, that there was a good chance, that he felt like, his master, the master he tried to ignore, because while he was technically a Sith, he had walked away from him a while ago, there was a chance that he knew that he had children. He had to find a way to tell her that. He knew that she would not be happy, and that there was a chance, that it would mess up any progress they had made. But, what was he supposed to do?
Was he supposed to not warn her? She had to trust him to keep them all safe? But, he didn’t know if he could get her to trust him, that implicitly. She was supposed to meet him, in the place they always met. When they met up late, it was typically because they both needed to see each other. They were both desperate, for each other. He wanted to be back at home so badly, but he knew that things took time.
This would make it more complex.
When he heard the door, he went to open it and he smiled at her. “You’re late.”
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New from Kevin Wozniak on Kevflix: Best of the 2010s: Best Movie Moments/Scenes
Every year since Kevflix has been alive, I’ve made a list of my favorite scenes/movie moments of that year. This is always my favorite list to make as it allows me to highlight some truly great moments in filmmaking, acting, and story-telling. I couldn’t count down the best movies of the decade without making a best scenes/moments of the decade, so here we are.
When making my list for the best scenes or movie moments of the 2010s, I focused on one key thing for what would make the list: emotion. What scenes brought the most emotion out of me? What was the scene that had me the most excited or the moment that nearly brought tears to my eyes? Which moment defined what cinema was in 2010s and which one changed it forever? After much deliberation, I have come up with these ten scenes/moments. These are the moments that no matter when I watch them, they make me feel like I did the first time I saw them and always bring out some sort of emotion in me.. Here are my picks for the best movie moments/scenes of the 2010s.
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You’ve been warned. But if you haven’t seen these movies by now, you’re missing out on some great cinema.
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10. THE DEATH OF HAN SOLO – STAR WARS: EPISODE VII – THE FORCE AWAKENS
JJ Abrams’ The Force Awakens was a perfect reintroduction to the Star Wars franchise. It introduced new fans to a legendary franchise and brought old fans back to franchise they once loved. But when Han Solo (Harrison Ford) is killed by his son Ben (Adam Driver), a.k.a Kylo Ren, it was Abrams sending a message. This was the start of a change. This was Abrams showing us that the Star Wars we knew was gone and that this was the dawn of a new story and new characters. It was a daring, shocking, powerful scene that still crushes my heart every time I watch it.
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9. “COOL GIRL” – GONE GIRL
“Nick loved a girl I was pretending to be. “Cool girl”. Men always use that, don’t they? As their defining compliment: “She’s a cool girl”.
Most movies will give you the twist at the ending. David Fincher and Gillian Flynn give you twists in the middle of the movie. In this dark mystery thriller about Nick Dunne (Ben Affleck) who’s wife goes missing and he becomes the prime suspect and has a spotlight shined on him in a media circus, Fincher and Flynn throw us for a loop right when we think we know where this movie is going. Rather than find out what happened to the man’s wife at the end of the movie, we find out in the middle and what a twist it is. We see as Nick’s wife Amy (Oscar nominee Rosamund Pike) is cruising down the highway in a beaten up car. From there is a beautiful combination of stellar filmmaking and writing. Flynns’ writing is electric, as Amy gives us a play-by-play of her plan, how’s she’s feeling, and why she’s doing what she’s doing. Fincher’s direction is sensational and works perfectly with Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross’ score and Kirk Baxter’s editing. Gone Girl is one of Fincher’s finest films and this is one Fincher’s finest moments as a director.
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8. “SINGLE-TAKE” BOXING FIGHT – CREED
I didn’t know what to expect going into Ryan Coogler’s Creed. Having loved Coogler’s debut film, Fruitvale Station, and being a big fan of the Rocky franchise, I thought I would enjoy the film. But it was this scene, in which Coogler does a “single-take” boxing fight showing us the first round and part of the second round until Adonis (Michael B. Jordan) wins by knockout, that I knew this movie was on a whole other level. The smooth movement of the camera, the physicality and swagger and Michael B. Jordan, and the building score make this one of the best boxing fights I’ve ever seen on film. Creed was my favorite movie of 2015 and it was Coogler’s directorial touch that elevated its greatness.
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7. “LET IT GO” – FROZEN
I have a niece who is three-years-old who is obsessed with Frozen. Whenever I see her, chances are she will be watching Frozen and singing along to it, most passionately to “Let It Go”, in which she sings and mimics everything Elsa is doing in this scene. This is six years after Frozen came out and it just shows how powerful the movie and its key set-piece are. “Let It Go” is the princess anthem of the millennium. It’s an empowering, catchy song that every little child and their parent knows the words to coupled with some beautiful animation. This is a song and movie that will continue to be popular and loved for years to come.
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6. H.A.L.O JUMP – MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – FALLOUT
If there is one thing we learned about Tom Cruise this decade it is that he is a madman. Though one of our greatest movie stars and a spectacular, awards-caliber actor, Cruise took the 2010’s to show just how insane of a man he is and how far he is willing to push himself, namely in the Mission: Impossible franchise. Cruise climbing The Burj Khalifa in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol almost snagged this spot, but Cruise’s H.A.L.O (High Altitude Low Open) jump in Fallout is an extraordinary stunt and feat of filmmaking. Jumping out of a plane at 30,000 feet and opening his parachute at under 3,000 feet is an insane stunt done by top military men and apparently Tom Cruise. How director Christopher McQuarrie shot the scene by having a cameraman follow Cruise as he falls through the air, giving us a front row view of how crazy this fall is, is nothing short of extraordinary, especially seeing it on IMAX. This was peak stunt work this decade and peak Cruise.
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5. DARTH VADER FINALE – ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS STORY
Rouge One was a first in the Star Wars franchise. This was the first side-story the franchise had ever done. It steered away from the Skywalker story and focused on a new set of characters, plots, and stories. Though Rogue One was about the group of soldiers who retrieved the plans to the Death Star, which would then be used by Rebels in A New Hope, we had no idea what to expect in this film, and while the film was very entertaining and unique from other Star Wars films, nothing could have prepared us for the Darth Vader finale. This is the greatest Darth Vader scene ever (yes, including “I am your father) as it showed Vader at the height of his powers, mowing down puny soldiers with his lightsaber and force powers. This ended Rouge One on a high note that nobody expected.
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4. NO MAN’S LAND – WONDER WOMAN
Patty Jenkins’ Wonder Woman came at just the right time for the DCEU. After Batman v. Superman and Suicide Squad disappointed critics and audiences alike, nobody knew what Warner Bros. and the DCEU were going to do. But Wonder Woman came along and saved it. Up until this scene, we only saw glimpses of what Diana (Gal Gadot) could do. She was still learning this new world she was in and was trying to understand how and why the war was the way it was. This was the first time we saw Wonder Woman. Not Diana, Wonder Woman. The shield wielding, head-banded hero who only wants to do good and save the world. This scene got every emotion in me going. It is inspiring, exciting, beautifully crafted, and awe-inspiring. This is the greatest superhero intro scene ever and it’s not even close. This was the birth of a hero. This was the birth of an icon.
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3. “CARAVAN” FINALE – WHIPLASH
Damien Chazelle’s sophomore film is a war film in the music room. A no-holds-barred look at being pushed to the limit for perfection. This all comes to a head in the film’s finale, where Andrew (Miles Teller) gets embarrassed by his former teacher Fletcher (Oscar winner JK Simmons) on stage at a performance. But rather than leave the concert, Andrew comes back on stage and changes the set and starts to perform “Caravan”. But it’s after the song where Andrew really shines, as he riffs for nearly five-minutes, giving the performance of his life full of blood, sweat, anger, and passion as Andrew shows Fletcher that he is the best. But this finale brings up the big question of how far is too far? Is Andrew giving Fletcher a giant middle finger or has he become the obsessive monster Fletcher was grooming him to be? Highlighted by expert editing and mad-house performances by Teller and Simmons, this is a heart-racing scene and one of the best finales of the decade.
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2. “SHALLOW” – A STAR IS BORN
The performance of “Shallow” in Bradley Cooper’s A Star is Born was the most overwhelming movie experience I had in 2018 and one of the most overwhelming experiences I have ever had in a movie. A scene of pure power, love, and emotions that had my eyes almost in tears. The dizzying, almost dream-like first act of the film comes to a head in this scene, as Jackson (Bradley Cooper) invites Ally (Lady Gaga) up on stage to sing a song they briefly wrote together the night before. Ally owns it, and sings her heart, much like Jackson knew she would. Perfectly shot and edited, with Gaga belting her heart out and Cooper presenting a confidence and swagger while being in a state of bliss as he falls in love with Ally and watches her become a star. The song is Oscar-worthy, but its Cooper’s direction and Gaga’s stunning voice that make “Shallow” an iconic cinematic moment this decade.
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1. “AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!” – AVENGERS: ENDGAME
The 2010’s belonged to comic book movies and cinematic universes and nobody did it better than the Marvel Cinematic Universe. After twenty-three movies (twenty-one released in the 2010’s) the MCU came to an epic finale with Avengers: Endgame and what a finale it was. Everything that was the MCU was on the screen at the final battle of Endgame, a scene that is not only the definition of awesome, but is epic on every scale. When all hope seems lost for Captain America (Chris Evans), Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), and the remaining Avengers and it looks like Thanos’ army will take over the planet, we hear the static of Falcon’s (Anthony Mackie) voice in Captain America’s ear, followed by the appearance of T’Challa (Chadwick Boseman) coming from a Doctor Strange portal. It is then an onslaught of everyone from the MCU appearing on screen, both those who disappeared in the snap from the previous movie and those who survived, all culminating in an attack on Thanos and his army with Captain America commanding, “AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!”. Alan Silvestri’s epic score takes over and we watch as eleven years and over twenty movies come together on the screen at the same time. You can’t help but get emotional watching this. We have grown with the MCU and The Avengers and all of these characters and seeing them all on screen at the same time fighting for their lives and the galaxy is something we had been waiting for for over a decade. This moment symbolizes so much of what cinema has become while also being the as big as anything that has ever been on the big screen, which is why it is the best movie moment of the decade.
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@exitiosae liked for a Starter and I’m lazy and continued this instead
Things were not fixed, and her stance on what the man did was unfaltered, in fact ... Her concern grew through the years and with the Empire in place, how dangerous it was, but also the part the man she loved played in it ... How could she ever forgive him? And yet, sometimes, all she wanted to do was forget, to snuggle against his side, and act as if everything was alright. As if their whole lives didn't fall apart in the blink of an eye. It wasn't entirely possible though, even less so when she closed her eyes to sleep.
For years, she'd see him in her dreams. Or nightmares would be more appropriate, with the man's madness in his eyes, and how he begged her to understand, to join him. At times, she was even able to feel the pressure around her neck, and she'd wake up, as if gasping for air to fill up her lungs. She had been lucky that it didn't leave any damages in the long run.
And now ... He was there, with her, in this room they once shared, and all she could do was listen before reaching out to him, placing one hand on the man's thigh which she squeezed gently. She was trying to show him some comfort, for him to know that she was there, that she wasn't going anywhere. That whatever he did, they'd get through it. Together. " That's a good sign. It's proof that you feel guilty -- That you're not entirely unredeemable. " She said in a gentle tone. She knew this man changed, a lot, that he'd never be the same again. He made sure to let her know Anakin was gone, times and times again. " All you can do, at this point, is try to do better. But also, to never forget them. Mourn them, because you know that whoever knew them are no longer present, or unaware of their fate. "
There was something about finding out that one’s wife was not dead, had faked her death and that he was very different now, that made it hard for them to pick up the pieces. He wanted desperately to. He still loved her desperately, and hated that he hadn’t looked harder, but his body had been so weak, and he’d been told that she was dead, just like she had been told that he was dead, But, they both knew the other was alive and he longed for her, in every sense of the world. When he slept, which was rare, as his body didn’t let him sleep due to pain, the nightmares came.
He had regrets. It wasn’t that he didn’t. He had nightmares of choking her, of killing those younglings. The adult Jedi, they didn’t matter to him, but her and the younglings, that would forever haunt him. He had been through hell. His body was forever altered, and he had lost so much of it.
He didn’t know what he thought coming to her tonight would do, but he needed to see her. She helped, even if it was hard for them, even if their future was uncertain. “I don’t know what I am, Padme. I’m scars, charred flesh, barely human. I don’t know what the answer it.” He had his rebreather on his neck. It allowed him to breathe, without a full suit, but he still needed it and he was ashamed of it. “Everyone knows of the Jedi Purge. I am sure their parents know. It’s hard to imagine their parents know and trusted and I killed them all. I didn’t understand that then, but as a father, it’s a pain I can’t imagine. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come here. I just, I needed you..I needed to see someone that doesn’t feel like cold death.”
#exitiosae#(Padme)#V: I am what you made me (Darth Vader with a twist)#(starters)#WEll this is emotional
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