#Uweh
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Yukio doesn't realize rin was lonely because he was key contributor to said loneliness
#Uweh#Rin does this too so just as a disclaimer so we're not dog piling on yukio#But one of yukios biggest communication issues is that hes fundamentally wrong about rin#'Rin had it easy cuz he got to live a normal life i was alone' not realizing that rin was also alone#He was so focused on making sure things stayed the same that he didnt realize things had already changed#One of yukios biggest character conflicts is also that he has internalized ableism#Just kidding....kind of#Hes terrified of becoming the monster that he perceives his brother to be#Anyway#Someone on another post said that yukio prolly does know rin was lonely and felt vindicated by that#Probably so deep he doesnt actually know he feels that way but its probably a 'serves you right'#Yukio doesnt have friends but he doesnt NEED them hes an adult and his brother is a child for wanting them#Kids who dont act right cant complain when they get abandoned#Thats a line directly from aono kun#Yall thought i was lying i wasnt#To summarize yukio though rin was normal cuz his family couls actually be his family#Their father actually acted like his dad whereas with yukio he was an authority figure#But in reality his family spent all their time with yukio praising yukio and rin got abandoned emotionally#Hes a troublemaker he cant rely on anyone cuz all he'll ever be is a villain at least his family is safe#blue exorcist#ao no exorcist#yukio okumura#rin okumura#okumura twins
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bb chub practice before critique ^
after! yay
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after yapping mofu's ear off yesterday talking about ocs now i wanna do more comics with eri's parents as the focus HERFHJEBJHRFBJERF
#SEE THIS IS WHY WE DONT TALK ABOUT BACKGROUND OCS SO MUCH#UEBGHJBHF ARGGHHHHH#BITES MY HAND#i have so many things to do#only two hands...#and i cant even draw using my left hand#UWEH#dean rambles
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no art lately because I'm suffering through my sem exams 😃 I'll be back in the second week of April or so ^_^
(I'm available on @goblinaurora , where I ramble and repost art and stuff, if y'all care or whatever)
#sorry for being inactive#uweh#i have stuff planned and in the works though#trust#also when i talk about myself ill probably use a tag now#jo.txt–🪷#that's the tag#ogey
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Why do even some of the nicest and most considerate people just COMPLETELY fail to even remotely understand or sympathize with avoiding some foods for sensory reasons.
If I was gluten-free people wouldn't try to make me eat stuffing, and if I avoided pork for religious reasons most people would be able to grasp that concept and respect it. But why is it the moment I say I don't want to eat something for the sake of...not eating something people immediately go from treating me as a grown-ass adult to acting like I'm just a stupid temperamental whiny autistic hatchling.
"Oh but have you tried it? You can't say you don't like it until you've tried it!" Maybe I have, and I almost threw up or had a meltdown. Or maybe I haven't and I just don't want to go through that process at the fucking family Christmas dinner.
I'm always fed up with the common perception that autistic people are the ones with no empathy because for the supposed bastions of empathy they are, there are a large fucking number of allistic people, even some who would swear up and down they understand and support autistic people, that just turn into broken records when you politely decline any sort of food. No, for the twentieth time, I don't want to try that food, I won't have changed my mind by next time you ask, and it's embarrassing that between us only the one with a dissociative disorder and memory issues seems to remember this, but you've been getting the same answers every year since I was 8 years old and having constant meltdowns and crying until I passed out.
#Uweh#I'll live I'm just hormonal and fed up right now and need a way to regulate my emotions since I can't cry
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when my disabilities actually disable me and prevent me from doing things, even if they're fun and i really want to
#this is so fucked up#umm today's angst is about wanting to join a roleplay thing... i'd truly love to#but it'll involve multiple people and i'm much too anxious to handle that many people and variables#when the anxiety is crippling#and i keep comparing myself to everyone else. which on a logical level i know is unfair to myself#i shouldn't be comparing me - who can't even leave the house alone - to my friends with jobs and such and who#generally have FAR less severe social difficulties than me#but it doesn't make me feel any better#uweh#personal
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Dizzy
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I'LLL MAAAAAAAAAAAKE YOU SAAAAAAAAYYYYYY HOW PROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUDDD YOUUU AAAAAREE OOOOOF MEEEEE
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I lowkey want to change my name to just Faiya and lose my current url (or i guess brand now) entirely but it's been with me for so long i kind of don't want to change it
#faiya rambles#i dont know i kind of really like faiya now than just fire#but fire is still so funny#uweh
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very roller-coaster kind of day
the upshot of it all is that I was offered a place in college! I start induction tomorrow aaa
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HEY LOOK EVERYONE ITS A PICTURE OF ME
been playing mystia’s izakaya a bunch
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yeah jackie?
egg song flashbacks
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