#Urien Wayne

[centuriesrpg]

[jimmythejiver]

For the first time in a long time I went to the movies in forever and then to Target. At Target I see some Godiva bars on discount yellow tags and I was ecstatic until I read 70% Cacao, Dark, Salted Caramel and was deflated.

Anyway that's how I felt about seeing The Green Knight. What you thought this was about chocolate?

No see since the pandemic I've been back on my perennial King Arthur kick. I've for a long time since I was a young preteen thought, someday I too will write my own King Arthur epic and it'll be gay, magical, gangster and culty too, but for now I'll make up my own stories for practice and then with every story I got attached too, it got too involved and convoluted to the point that when it came down to actually writing a novel, I threw it all away and made a space opera I only planned in two weeks and wrote in a month. Anyway...so now I've been writing this very gay, magical, gangster and culty take on Final Fantasy XV with my boyfriend and just fell in love with Somnus Lucis Caelum who nobody has any insight about him than to make him the Mordred to Ardyn's Arthur, which is a strange flex, but okay, I thought about what if I wrote a Dark Age prequel about Ardyn and Somnus, but Ardyn becomes king and Somnus his shogun and they play games of seduction and power because I'm twisted like that. Anyway...I was like I'm never going to write this and I have to keep making up characters based on FFXV characters and King Arthur tropes because there's not a lot of stories that take place during the Dark Ages, it's always some Roman Empire story, or High Middle Ages and FFXV gave no room for either society to happen after the fall of Solheim and the rise of King Somnus...so we left with Dark Ages, y'all, the King Arthur comparisons are obvious, but Ardyn is no Arthur and Somnus is no Mordred, Aera is only Guenevere if you make up an affair with Somnus, Gilgamesh is no Bedwyr/Bedivere, but uh...they both amputees and the oldest companions to their respective kings so...I guess. Anyway making an ancestor of Cor Leonis and deciding well he's Owain/Yvain, or am Ignis type as idk Sir Cai/Kay I guess, they both cook, but Cai's more like Seifer Almasy than any FF character... Anyway I'm losing people.

My plan was to just scrap the FFXV prequel, leave my Somnus ideas into Overtime (a gangster and gods story) and just plan an actual King Arthur adaptation. I'd have King Arthur the treasure hunter, leader of a warband turned founder of Camelot who fights giants, giant cats and dogheads, but also fights King Claudas of the Franks and King Aelle of the Saxons and Cerdic a Briton who puts in his lot with the Saxons, etc. It'd been a a glorified turf war, meanwhile Arthur's gotta make alliances with King Pelles, The Fisher King and his strange cult he's founded because, why yes I find the ends justifies the means prophecy of the Holy Grail Quest very culty because Christianity then does not resemble it now. Meanwhile you got the secondary plots of Mordred, Gawain, Lancelot, Percival, Tristam and other's going on because they matter and too many modern King Arthur stories sideline the knights.

So many have always sidelined Mordred as a final boss eldritch abomination in mortal flesh conceived of sin and give him no personality, or complex motives, or even just a relationship with Arthur. I also have noticed the general sidelining of Lancelot, or give him a chad villain upgrade if you must include him at all, and the villainizing of Gawain to the point that you don't even have to have Mordred, or Agravain as a catalyst shit stirrer in court, just slap Gawain's name on Liam Neeson in a top knot and you're good. Mordred can just be a child offscreen until last act...fuck that, while Morgan Le Fay can either be a villainess plotting her cabal through men, or a well-intentioned, ineffectual idiot. Fuck that.

Now Hollywood just be doing King Arthur first acts that suck ass, only for said director to get rewarded failing upwards by giving this same jerk the Aladdin remake. The tonally shitty, crammed in blockbuster mess of a cliche heroe's journey that sucks.

With that background I was excited for The Green Knight. I read an illustrative version as a kid, I read Tolkien's translation as a teenager, I read Simon Armitage's superior, but with liberties taken translation. I was prepped to go knowing that indie, or not they were going to make changes to weave the disjointed poem together. I'm excited that because this movie exists Project Guternberg's finally thrown Jessie Weston's prose rendition up on their website. I'll be reading that at some point when this blows over.

The movie adaptation makes a lot of...choices, many I wouldn't love, but would forgive had their been a payoff. There was none.

The journey was fine, the cinematography was a breath of fresh air after crappy slo mo, glossy action scenes ruined another. Guys, I don't think I want to see a Zack Snyder Excalibur, it'll marginally be better than Guy Ritchie, but that ain't saying anything. Leave Excalibur to the post-Star Wars 80s where it is impeccable for it's time. I liked Green Knight's breathable pacing, it's color palette's in the forests and mountains made up for the muddy grey of every Ridley Scott send up in the castles and villages in every other Dark Ages/Medieval story in the last I don’t know since the shitty 00′s. For all the dark tones when there was blues, greens, yellows or reds, they were vibrant in this movie to contrast the gloom of Britain. The soundtrack was good. This isn't all what makes a movie, but it enhances it so let's get to the story and what I did and didn't like.

Things I Liked: Gawain is still a novice in his career The Costume Dressing Everyone pronounces Gawain's name different. I pronounce it like Gwayne, or Guh Wayne, but here you got Gowen (like Owen), Gowan (like Rowan), or even Garlon who I'm pretty sure is the Fisher King's heir in some versions of that Arthurian story, so uh... The reference to Arthur slaying 960 men with his bare hands (Nennius for the win!) The Waste Land that is implied to be a site of a battle (an important aspect of the Arthurian landscape) The Fox companion No long grisly, drawn out hunting scenes. The Fox lives! No misogynist speeches

Things I'm Mixed: This being a dream, is the magic real? Are the giants? Is the Green Knight a figment of Gawain's imagination from a spell Morgan casted in him to hallucinate? Is Lord and Lady also figments? It's...a way to interpret the poem, but lazy and I don't see why it's got to all fantasy, or all dream...this movie makes it too vague you're stuck picking one camp than to accept it's a fantasy with dream and hallucinatory sequences.

Things I'm Meh: Morgan Le Fay as Gawain's mom. Look I fucking hate Morgause as a character and these two get merged and steal each other's aspects so much at this point the difference is who did they marry, King Urien or King Lot? Both are attributed to being Mordred's mom, Mordred is Gawain's brother...both practice magic depending on certain incarnations, both love and hate Arthur their brother and are in conflict with him. Saint Winifred. I actually liked this sequence, but I don't appreciate her as the tacked on wife in the later dream sequence as like...a contrast between the wife you should marry than the whore next door you don't respect anyway? I don't even know what lesson I'm supposed to get out of the damn dream sequence, or any of it? That Gawain should've married his girlfriend and then he'd be a just ruler? That he shouldn't be king? That he'd never have to make the same heartless, impartial choices? I don't know, he seemed like a king doing king shit because guess what? It never gets easier. Wars will be waged. The world didn't become better because he married the right woman, respected her and lived in obscurity. The world didn't become better because he made her his queen. We certainly don't know the world would be better Gawain had his head chopped off and dead XP They never reveal the Lord and the Green Knight as one and the same because of this shit.

Things I Hated: Arthur withdraws from the challenge because he's old. In poem he takes it on and Gawain takes it so he don't have to and he finds himself more disposable than the king. Gawain only takes the challenge because of arrogance. Arthur and Gawain had no prior personal relationship. I'd not have hated this so much if it wasn't compounded by it cancelling out the first two things. Gawain is portrayed as having no respect for his woman, or any woman, maybe his mother? He has to be pushed by Winifred to regain her head. Gawain is portrayed as arrogant, covetous and ready to pass the buck, or the bare minimum than have any honor or decency. It didn't matter the kid in the wasteland was shithead bandit, the way Gawain acted towards him, when he gets robbed, it almost feels like he deserved it and Gawain doesn't learn a damn lesson. I'll admit him taking the sword to cut his ropes and cutting his hands was a neat sequence, it shows him go from stupid, to almost clever and having will to survive...you know traits he had in the poem, but he stops showing these traits or growing. Basically Gawain has to be dragged kicking and screaming to help people and shows no fortitude when facing temptation, or when showing respect towards others, it's exhausting. You don't make this kind of journey story without character growth. Why are you skipping this? Also is it just me, or is this like when you take Frank Miller Batman and transport him onto a Bill Finger story? This is at best Thomas Malory Gawain (and this is charitable) transported on the earlier Pearl Poet's story. Stop it. It's not tonally correct and goes at odds with the story and the set up characterization you'd need to tell it. Speaking of which, you know how I get through the oof... of Liam Neeson Gawain in Excalibur? By pretending he Agravain instead. Here...I don't even think Gawain could pass as Mordred in spite of his covetous nature, lust and entitlement. Why? because I don't think even Mordred is this dumb to warrant this hubris. Essel being invented as a tacked on love interest just to be shit on utterly and for what? I don't think I have much commentary here as there is no Essel I'm aware of to compare, or stack up. I just notice this trope of like...usually if you include a sex worker in Hollywood she often has a heart of gold, she often has her own sense of values that goes at odds with society, but is more true and less hypocritical than a privileged lady’s. I thought that's what they would've done with the added trope of back at home sweetheart to contrast and pit her against the despicable femme fatale of Lady Bertilak and her adultery and her ladyship...and I'm glad they didn't...but you did nothing with Essel than to shit on her for existing when you made her exist, you know. Lady Bertilak being portrayed as the seductress devil incarnate. Look I know adultery is a touchy taboo, but uh her and Gawain hit it off in the poem, dammit! Her values and his values come to clash, but here it's played off as Gawain is stupid and covetous and Lady Bertilak wants to prove something because...? If my brother's theory that she's a figment of Morgan Le Fay's magic, then I'll take this as a lesson of Gawain is impulsive and covetous and his mom knows it, but he don't want to fuck his mom, but he wants her power, and Morgan wants to teach him a lesson... I guess. Hey we don't have misogynist speeches in this movie, but we'll make sure to have the movie drip with it with no point, or commentary. Pass. Lord guilting, extracting and initiating the same sex kiss and only once. Poem automatically better that Gawain don't have to keep being reminded to keep his part of the bargain and he does it willingly more than once. What he doesn't do is give up his belt...gods how did we get more homophobic as a society that the homoeroticism here is worse? Catholics of the middle ages officially had no issue doing same sex, passionate kissing until it lead to sex. The Ending: The gods damn ending. In the movie as is, Gawain waits to uphold his end of the bargain and get his head chopped off. He imagines, even though we don't get any fuzzy or distortion to indicate this is a dream, but I already knew this was coming, he runs away and comes home, is regarded a hero, he sees his lady, takes her from behind and if you saw Brokeback Mountain (I didn't, but DJ has) you know this is a sign of disrespect to women. He gets her knocked up, pays her off for the kid she wants to keep, he is crowned king, marries the ghostly saint lady he helped retrieve her head earlier from a lake in the movie (this right here is the damn tip off). There's no more dialogue by this point and everything is montaging, so you know by now it's a dream, though nothing is out of focus. He rules as a heartless king, his whore son dies from war he waged, he has a daughter, his wife dies. Gawain then takes off the belt that would've saved his life and his head falls off. This would've been the one good twist, except... In this sequence of events he never had his head cut off so uh... now we back in present day. He decides not to bitch out, Green Knight in a sexy way is like "now off with your head," movie cuts to credits with no resolve...uh what the fuck? What the fuck? This is not good. You wasted the one twist in your dream when idk, you could've...

How I'd fix it: No dream sequence at all. No Incident At Owl Creek twist. Gawain comes home a hero and survivor of this game and ordeal. He wears this belt of shame. He becomes a well-renowned knight, but he bears a shame. One day he goes to take off his belt and his head falls off because he cheated to get this belt and to survive this encounter. There. Done. Improved your high concept movie that couldn't play any of the lessons straight from the damn poem without making everyone an asshole for no reason! Ugh! But nope you had to end it on we don’t know if Gawain lives or dies...because...it's dream magic made from his momma's witchcraft...?

Last Thoughts So then post-credits scene because Marvel because Pirates Of The Caribbean existed. A white girl who looks nothing like Gawain's daughter we see who didn’t pay off, or any child I can remember through this whole movie picks up King Arthur's crown that dream Gawain inherited and puts it on her head. Who is this girl? Are we gonna have an indie equivalent of of the Marvel Movie Universe/Universal Horror Monsters thing with ancient British legends? We gonna get a Life Of Saint Patrick next that crosses over? I don't know. What is this?

[sofrpc]

⌖*ﾟ— 550+ UNIQUE AND UNDERUSED MALE NAMES

as requested, i have created a masterlist of 550+ unique and underused male names ! these are all listed in alphabetical order, and although i dont claim any of these as my own, please don’t copy and paste straight into another masterlist. feel free to use the names in any way you like, i hope this gives you muse for your characters (my faves are bolded) — also smash that like or reblog if you found this useful, thank you !

A

abel, acacius, ace, achilles, adagio, adaiah, adalius, adley, adelio, adonis, adrian, adriel, aiden, akello, alain, alarik, alastair, alek, alfred, alfonzo, ali, alisio, alonzo, amari, amedeus, amias, amos, anakin, andre, ansel, anton, anwar, apollo, aragon, aramis, archer, aries, arlo, arrius, artemis, asher, ashton, asriel, atlas, atlantis, atticus, auden, august, auri, austin, avery, axel, aziel

B

bacchus, baden, bailey, baldwin, balin, balton, bandit, banks, barley, baxley, baxter, baze, bear, beau, beck, benson, bentley, berlin, bianco, bishop, blade, blaine, blaze, bode, bodhie, booker, bosley, boston, brandon, brantley, brayden, braxton, brecken, brennon, brett, briley, brinley, brock, bruno, bronx, brooks, bryce, bryson

C

caelan, caesar, cade, cador, cage, cain, caleb, callaway, callen, callister, callum, calvin, camden, campbell, carlisle, carlo, carrick, carter, casey, casper, castiel, cedric, cesar, channing, charles, chase, chuck, clifton, clinton, cleon, coen, coleman, colton, crew, cristiano, cooper, corbin, corey, cortez, cravin

D

dale, dallas, dalton, damari, damian, damon, dane, dante, dario, darius, davon, dax, dean, declan, dedrick, delius, demarcus, demetrius, dennis, denzel, deon, derek, devon, dexter, dillon, dimitri, dion, dolan, dominic, drake, drew, drystan, duke, dwayne, dwight, dyson

E

eaton, echo, edan, eddison, eden, edrick, eli, eliam, elias, elijah, elio, eliseo, ellis, emilio, emerson, emmett, enoch, enzo, ernest, eros, essex, evan, evian, ezra

F

fabian, falcon, fallon, farley, felix, fenton, finley, finnick, floyd, flynn, fonso, ford, forester, francisco, franco, freddy, frederick, frodi

G

gabe, gabriel, gaius, gabin, galvin, gareth, garrick, gaston, gaveel, georgie, gemini, giorgio, glade, gonzalo, gray, gregory, greyson, griffin, grover, gunner, guy

H

haim, hadden, hadley, hale, hammond, hanan, hanson, harden, harley, harris, hayes, helio, helix, hendrix, hermes, hiram, holden, holland, holmes, houstan, howard, hudson, hugh, hugo, hunter, hyde

I

iago, ian, icarius, idris, iker, ilario, indigo, isaak, isaiah, israel, ithiel, ives

J

jace, jadon, jago, jahziel, jairo, jakez, jakobe, jamari, janos, jaron, jasper, javier, jaxon, jayden, jaylon, jaziel, jenson, jeremiah, jermaine, jersey, jett, joaquin, jonas, jose, joss, jovani, joziah, judas, jude, julian, julius, junior, justice

K

kace, kaden, kael, kairo, kahlil, kai, kaleb, kamden, kanan, karson, kashton, kasper, keenan, keiran, kennedy, keon, kenton, kenzo, keyon, kez, kiah, killian, kingsley, kito, klaus, kobe, koby, kodah, kohen, kolton, kristian, knox, kyan, kynan, kyson

L

lamar, lamont, lance, landon, laney, larkin, lawyer, lazarus, leandro, lee, legend, lennox, leno, leon, levi, lex, liko, link, locke, loki, loman, lonzo, lorenzo, luca, lucian, lukas, lyam, lynx

M

mac, machi, macklin, maddox, magnus, maison, major, makeo, malaki, manning, mano, marion, marlon, mars, martez, mathias, maxton, mekhi, meyer, micah, milian, miller, milo, montey, montez, myles

N

nakos, nasir, nathaniel, neel, neriah, nero, nevada, nicolo, nicklaus, nickolai, nico, nike, nikos, nixon, noah, nolan, norton, nye

O

oakley, oberyn, obi, obsidian, octavian, oison, olimpio, olsen, omar, ontario, onyx, orion, orlando, oskar, oslo, oryn, otis, oxford, oxley

P

pablo, paley, palmer, parker, parson, pauly, paxton, pearce, perkin, phelix, phoenix, pierre, pike, podrick, porter, preston, prince, puck

Q

qamar, quinten, quillon, quince

R

racer, radley, rafael, rafer, ralph, rambo, ramiel, ramone, randall, raven, rayan, reed, reese, rhydian, ricardo, ridley, riker, riley, river, robin, rocco, roderick, roland, roman, romeo, ronan, roni, rowan, royden, rufus, ryder, ryland

S

sadler, safari, salem, salix, salvador, sami, santiago, sawyer, sean, seaton, severo, shayne, shiloh, silas, silvano, simba, skander, skyler, slade, spencer, spiro, stanley, stefan, syrus

T

talmon, tane, tanner, tate, tatum, tavis, teddy, terence, theo, theon, tirion, titus, tobias, tommen, tonio, travis, trey, troye, trystan, turner, tyrell, tyrese, tyson

U

ulan, uri, uriel, urien

V

vadim, vale, vance, valentine, vaughn, venturo, venus, vermont, vero, victor, vidor, vince, volante, voss

W

wade, walker, walter, warner, warren, watson, waylan, wayne, wilder, wilson, wilton, wolfgang, wyatt, wynton

X

xander, xavier, xenos, xylon

Y

yates, york, yuri, yusef

Z

zacharias, zade, zavier, zayn, zed, zeke, zero, zeus, zion