#Top 5 Wrestlers who should have beaten Hulk Hogan

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Top 5 Wrestlers who should have beaten Hulk Hogan

Ladies &gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to the newest contributor to Ring the Damn Bell...Rob Faint! Please make him feel welcome and enjoy his first piece on our blog... Top 5 Wrestlers who should have beaten Hulk Hogan

Rob Faint No wrestler was bigger than Hulk Hogan in the 80’s. He was everywhere, from movies to TV, magazines, and lunchboxes. He rarely lost a match. He defeated a virtual who’s who of wrestling: Terry Funk, Don Muraco, King Kong Bundy, Hercules Hernandez, Nikolai Volkoff and many others. He had some great feuds, but he always seemed to come out on top. I always have thought that one of these…

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What-If The Rock Never Came Back?

The WWE after the unfortunate retirement of superstar, and champion Edge, was a baron wasteland shallow on talent. Arguably, a worse roster than the first couple of years post-Hulk Hogan in the mid-1990’s. Where at least then creative was willing to take risks and search for new guys to be that top Babyface, WWE didn’t feel the need to do that and instead relied heavily on John Cena and Randy Orton, and called in favors whenever they felt it necessary.

Chris Jericho, Kevin Nash, Triple H, The Undertaker dragged out of retirement with mixed results. Though Jericho was successful, the company pushed their chips in the middle of the table for the pasty Irishmen Shaemus. A wrestler who makes Roman Reigns look awesome in comparison. To put it bluntly, Shaemus was disgusting.

This era seemed all too hapless. Alberto Del Rio, a decent heel, talented wrestler won the Royal Rumble and faced the champion Edge in the third match on the WrestleMania card. Before 2006, winning the rumble meant you would main event WrestleMania. But, like all things, corporate meddling ruins a perfectly good thing for no good reason. If Vince McMahon doesn’t believe Del Rio to be main event material, then put somebody else over at the event. Nobody overthinks and under-thinks likes the WWE.

If there’s one thing WWE did right it was how they told the three-year story of John Cena and his feud with returning superstar The Rock. Starting off at WrestleMania 27, Cena gunning for The Miz’ WWE Championship. Though creative did allow Rock to bury both Miz and Cena, it is an otherwise small blemish on a well told, large scale story.

Miz deserves credit for getting himself over. His name is stupid. He has a very punchable face. His brash, egotistical demeanor built him up to status of champion. His fame from the Reality TV show MTV’s The Real World: Back to New York shotgunned him to stardom. He started appearing on Jimmy Fallon’s show and for the first time in a while WWE had an organic star. Cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase on Randy Orton on a November 22nd episode of Raw after Orton defended against Wade Barrett.

Heading into ‘Mania, Miz was 133 days into what’ll end up as a 160 day title reign. Rock overseeing the festivities foreshadowed the larger tale in its beginning stages. The Miz retained twice that night. Once on a count-out, the other when Rock intervened and Rock Bottomed Cena from behind. The Miz left still the champion. But with Rock standing above his lifeless body after taking a devastating Spinebuster, followed by a People’s Elbow, the Miz’ push was effectively over as we transitioned wholly into the Rock-Cena feud.

Outside of The Miz, WWE didn’t really bulldoze anyone while building to their “Once in a lifetime” fantasy match. In fact, someone else rose to prominence during all of this. C.M Punk. The C.M stands for many things. Chick Magnet. Chicago Made. Punk dallied around in the second tier of WWE contending for the World Heavyweight Championship strap. Gaining wins over the likes of The Undertaker, Jeff and Matt Hardy, and Batista.

His intel gimmick was promoting his “Straight Edge” persona. Normally an Atheist, Punk portrayed himself as a cult leader absolving troublemakers of their sins. Wrapped around his fists is tape with big X’s on each hand. This is what club bouncers would do to underaged club attendants to notify bartenders not to drink. On his knuckles “Drug” and “Free” are tattooed. Punk lived this gimmick and cranked it up to 11.

Eventually, Punk’s gimmick ran out of steam and he was forced to go back to the drawing board. With his contract set to expire after 2011’s Money in the Bank, Punk was set to square up against champion Cena. In effort to juxtapose himself with the usually straight laced Cena, Punk decided to incorporate his real-life frustrations with WWE’s creative into a promo one night on Raw. Promising to take the belt with him out of the WWE showing no intentions of re-signing. Punk mentioned that Hulk Hogan, Rock, and Cena was good for was kissing Vince McMahon’s ass. He derided the fans for their superficiality. Harangued the McMahon Family for their stupidity. Punk wasn’t just an average run of the mill heel to be beaten. Punk portrayed himself as someone with a purpose.

How this was all packaged felt so unnatural fans actually believed Punk was leaving the WWE whether he won or lost. That even if he did win, he’d just leave as champion. With special guest referee Triple H watching, Punk defeated Cena (though Cena clearly had his foot on the ropes rendering the pin nullified, HHH didn’t see it) and absconded with the belt never to return...

He’d be back in eight days.

The new champion was fan favorite Rey Mysterio. A 5-foot, 6 inch Mexican luchador. His only main title was his brief reign as World Heavyweight Champion years ago. Just as fast Rey rose to the top he found himself in the mid card. Still, after defeating a lukewarm The Miz in a meh match the crowd become unglued. Their masked hero was given the push he deserved. Though it wasn’t on the grandest of stages it didn’t matter.

In less than an hour Cena would take the belt back from Rey.

One word: Bastards.

Why act like you’re giving the fans something they desperately wanted only to take it away so fast? Having Rey as champion meant nothing. He didn’t even hold it for a week.

Anyways, Cena is champion only to again fall to Punk at a match for Summerslam. Within minutes, Money in the Bank winner Del Rio would cash-in his briefcase and win the belt for himself. Del Rio was in the tournament Mysterio won for Punk’s vacant belt. He lost to Kofi Kingston in the first round. I understand why you can’t have a heel vs heel match for the championship, but of all the people to get one over on the conniving Punk why does it have to be the uninspiring Del Rio?

This was basically done to get Cena out of the title picture so he could let Rock go over at ‘Mania. Why does Rock need to win at ‘Mania you ask? Because we need a reason to do this again the next year. Why do we need to this same match again next year? Because fuck you.

Punk entered WrestleMania the champ, winning the strap back from Del Rio at Survivor Series. Punk would go on to hold the belt for 442. A returning Chris Jericho came in second in the Royal Rumble and earned himself a title shot, losing by submission. This was the highest profile win for Punk during his long reign.

Punk’s title reign came to an end at the hands of The Rock at the Royal Rumble to set up a rematch with Cena. While the first Cena-Rock match did gangbusters at the box office was well received critically, the second incarnation fell flat. We can’t really blame WWE for chasing the cash. That’s their prerogative as a corporation.

But say we lived in a perfect world? What-if Rock simply never came back?

Well, WrestleMania 27 goes down as perhaps the biggest disaster in the companies history since WrestleMania 9. That card was severely lacking in star power which is exactly why The Rock was needed to host. The top heel going into the event was a mysterious G.M who only made their presence known via email from a laptop next to the announce table.

WrestleMania 28, Cena likely goes into the PPV the challenger to face the champion Punk. Royal Rumble winner Shaemus (yuck) sadly beats World Heavyweight Champion Daniel Bryan in 18 seconds.

The biggest loser is Jericho. Given absolutely nothing to do, despite being incredibly talented and superior to Shaemus. In our timeline, Jericho earned his title shot by winning a Ten Man Battle Royal on Raw. That definitely doesn’t happen. WWE was pushing Shaemus HARD. In my perfect world, Jericho and Bryan have a show higher up on the card with the young heel Bryan going over.

But, as we’ve previously established. The WWE run by a bunch of talentless, thoughtless bastards who wage constant war with the people they are supposed to try and get money from.

For my preferred scenario, Bryan going over even with the secondary belt probably placates his rapid fans for at least a few more years.

Cena likely goes over Punk clean as a whistle after losing (via shenanigans) twice before.

From simply making The Rock disappear we’ve cost the WWE millions, elevated Bryan, and destroyed Punk’s illustrious lengthy title reign.

The second year of this scenario, instead of a “Worst Year of Cena’s Life” shtick, perhaps we’re treated to his best year. He main events every PPV, successfully defends his title beating back various heels. Cena’s title reign is unspectacular outside of the walls of WWE.

Okay, on second thought... Punk retains. He retains versus Cena, Jericho, Kane, Ryback, Orton, simply runs through the roster. At the Royal Rumble with no Rock to push Punk down a peg he retains heading into WrestleMania 29. The only hurdle he hasn’t overcome is The Undertaker and his WrestleMania Streak of 20-0.

Does Punk end The Streak? Should he? Oh, hell no! Punk probably had one foot out the door by then for a multitude of understandable reasons. Regardless, the money in this universe is pitting Streak vs Streak.

Our good friend Daniel, his reign eventually ends, but he isn’t shuffled so far down the card so his epic, long-standing push culminating in his crowning achievement in WrestleMania 30 is pushed back a year or two. Maybe in WrestleMania 31 it’s Bryan in Seth Rollins place cashing in his MITB briefcase mid-match to steal the World Heavyweight Championship from under Brock Lesnar and Roman Reign’s noses.

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My Picks For The Best Matches Of The Undertaker

If you are in an arena watching a WWE event live and you heard that gong, almost immediately you knew who it was coming.

It's been a week now since WrestleMania 33 and the final match of The Undertaker's career, one that has spanned over 27 years and has had numerous ups and downs. For what it's worth, the man has become interlinked with the WWE and there is no one quite like him, nor will there ever be anyone as iconic as The Undertaker in my view. There are many stories about the man, and his influence  in the industry but recounting all of those laone would require a massive novel style entry. No, instead I'm opting to choose the matches I have seen that best define his career. I'm pretty sure one of these you may not be familiar with though..

1)  The Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan, Survivor Series 1991

A year after his debut, The Undertaker was finally booked in a one on one match with the other living icon of the WWE, Hulk Hogan. The Undertaker had already gone through a who's who of wrestlers, even the Ultimate Warrior, but there was no way that he could take out those 24 inch pythons, right?

WRONG.

...well to be fair, it was due to interference from The Nature Boy Ric Flair that the Undertaker shocked the world and defeated Hogan to win his first WWF title (not a typo). It would, of course, be a short reign, after the next PPV a few days later. The two men would have a few more encounters over the years, but the first one is probably the most notable.

2) The Undertaker vs. Jake The Snake Roberts, WrestleMania VIII

This took place after a rather unexpected event, which was the Undertaker's first face turn. After saving Elizabeth, Randy Savage's then wife, from a chair attack by Jake, the two confronted each other at the Funeral Parlor. It ended with the Undertaker having a casket lid closed on his hand and several chair shots to him by Jake. A match at WrestleMania was inevitable.

One of the most notable things about this, aside from the ring work these two did as well as the Undertaker's mannerisms (he literally seemed as though he was undead) was the Undertaker not only taking 2 DDTs from Jake (a move that, up to this point, no one really got up from) but seemingly getting up from them as though it barely fazed him. The match ended with Jake taking a Tombstone on the outside, and things would only progress for the Dead Man from there.

3) The Undertaker Vs. Mankind (Hell In A Cell) King of The Ring

Mick Foley, aka Mankind, has had many matches with the Undertaker in his long career in the WWE. Hell, when he first debuted almost immediately he was booked as the prime antagonist for the Dead Man. While many people thought there was no way that Mankind would have much luck with him (even Shane Douglas, as Mick recalled in his book "Have A Nice Day", told him that he would not be booked to win) the first match and several other subsequent matches, would see Mankind as the winner. But this match right here, this one is possibly the most memorable of their feud for many, MANY reasons.

I remember reading about this match from Mick's POV and as he told it, at first he and Terry Funk joked about several different ways that Undertaker and Mick could approach this match, as Mick thought after the Undertaker-Michaels match, he had to find some way to top it, but the idea of starting the match on top of the cell itself stuck with him. The Undertaker, understandably, was hesitant to do this, even going so far as to asking Mick "Why do you want to die?" (I'm pretty sure it was worded differently actually) but he eventually relented.

The match itself can best be described as a testament to the resilient nature of these two men; The Undertaker was wrestling with a broken foot, so climbing the cage itself would be a burden on him. But of course, the highlights of the match was the two huge bumps that Foley took, that being the toss from the top of the cell into the Spanish Announcer's table (those poor bastards) and the chokeslam through the cell itself. Ironically, the cell, while parts of it were tended to for certain spots, was not exactly meant for what the Undertaker did and Mick had noted had the Undertaker done the choke slam properly, most likely that really would have killed him, or at the very least given him paralysis. The match itself was a turning point in the career of both men, even though they consider the previous Hell in A Cell Match better.

4) The Undertaker vs. Jinsei Shizaki, Michinoku Pro 1997

At this point you may be asking "who in the blue hell is Jinsei Shizaki?" and I will forgive you for saying that because you may not be familiar with puroresu, but may recognize certain stars that wrestled here in the US (Like Shinsuke Nakamura, Asuka,  Hideo Itami AKA Kenta Kobayashi, Taijiri, Great Muta, Jushin Thunder Liger...)

Anyway, you may remember a wrestler named Hakushi who had a memorable stint wrestling against Bret Hart and was one of the other guys beaten by Barry Horowitz. (And he would actually team up with him too. No, I shit you not) But before I get off track, the WWF (again not a typo) has had interpromotional matches in the past, and it should be noted various other stars associated with the WWE had matches in Japan as well, one of them probably a more infamous example. (It involved John "Earthquake" Tenta and Koji Kitao)

The Undertaker vs Shizaki is notable not only for the in ring work, but the gimmick; Japanese undead vs. American undead- Jinsei was brought into the ring via a casket and only until the bell rang did he finally stir. If you can find a copy of it on DVD, see it as it's a pretty damn good match.

Oh yeah, let me just leave THIS...

5) The Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy, Monday Night Raw (Ladder Match), 2002

This match took place in the heyday of Undertaker's Biker days, or in this case Big Evil. Jeff Hardy had laid the challenge for a match that the Undertaker had never participated in up until this point, and considering the types of matches he's been in, that says a LOT. At the end of the day, not only did the Undertaker retain the Undisputed championship, he did the one thing that a lot of people praise him for; putting talent over. Yeah, Jeff lost, but what happened afterwards, after taking a Last Ride after the match and refusing to stay down, leading to the Undertaker rasing his hand in respect, that was one thing that will always stand out for me.

6) The Undertaker vs. Kane, WrestleMania 20

So, WrestleMania 20, what do you remember most about that one? The great match between Eddy Gurerro and Kurt Angle? The match that pitted Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg (aka "FUCK YOU, The Prequel), or, like me, do you remember it most for the return of The Dead Man as he laid a beating upon the man who has buried him alive?

Yeah it was for that reason alone. NOTHING ELSE OF NOTE HAPPENED THAT NIGHT I SWEAR.

Random AIM worker: But what about that title match between HHH, Shawn Michaels and--(Deadpool shoots him in the head.)

Deadpool: NOTHING.

7) The Undertaker vs. Edge, Summerslam (Hell In A Cell)

There have been many a match between these two superstars. This one though, the one that ended their feud, is probably the most prominent one as it showed all the stops Edge was going to put out in order to win. He reached deep down and found the, pardon my expression, edge he lost to battle the Undertaker...and it still was not enough to deny him his revenge. And of course that whole chokeslamming him to hell thing was also sweet.

8) The Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels, WrestleMania 25

Out of the 2 matches that the two men had, I prefer the first one over the one that marked the end of Shawn's in ring career, mostly as this showed just how well these two legends, both who usually preform at their best in WrestleMania, can do. Some may consider Shawn Mr. WrestleMsnia, but I always felt Undertaker was WrestleMania incarnate.

So, yes, I'm ending the list right here because honestly, I can't really name any more single moment of the Undertaker's career that shines more to me than these examples. If you have any memories, feel free to share them with me. And no, my respect for this man will never waver and myappreciation for his contributions will never...