#Tokyo revengers sanzu

[vixensbrainrotts]

TR men reacting to little kids wooing you

Content: reactions

Tropes: established relationship

Warnings: none (lmk if im wrong)

Summary: A little boy, perhaps four or five of age comes waddling over to you two whilst you're out on a date together and offers you a flower, confessing his spontaneous love for you. How does your man react to that?

Vixen’s two cents: hi! This has been sitting in my drafts forever so i need to get it out cause it’s collecting cobwebs. It’s sort of a random idea but whatever, i found it entertaining. Also im editing this in the car and its giving me a stroke why is the road so fucking uneven? If you have any ideas for me to write please please please my requests ans messages are open! Yeah, let me know if there are any other characters that fit those types and enjoy!

(Takemichi, Chifuyu, Souya, Hakkai, Shinichiro, Sanzu (I don’t care what anyone says. Shy Sanzu is forever on my agenda), Inui)

Nearly deceased type, it took him so long to get you. How HOW is this little ass kid wooing you better than he could ever dream of? What the actual fuck was happening? He couldn’t believe his eyes when that actual toddler came up to you with a flower, the stem freshly plucked, and a glimmer in the kid‘s hopeful eyes. The boy had almost serenaded you the way he sang praises to you: „excuse me miss, you’re really pretty! Would you accept my flower please?“. And what was even more unbelievable, was when you giggled and accepted the flower giddily. Then the little boy crossed the line: „can I have a kiss in return Miss?“. And you did. You pecked the cheek of the boy meek two minutes after meeting him! Unbelievable! It took him 3 dates to even hold your hand. Outrizzed by a five year old.

(Nahoya, Mikey, Baji)

Ready to fight the kid. He's deadass about it too, rolling up his sleeves and cracking his knuckels and snapping the kinks in his neck, looking menacingly at that poor little boy. He doesn't care that this may be the kid's first crush, he'll crush him in return. You were his damnit and he was gonna prove it to anyone who tried him. Kids included. When you pull at his arm though, prompting him to calm down, he stops a little. What do you mean you dont want him to establish his dominance? He's genuinely stumped and just kinda stares at you for a second, watching you intensely as you lean down to the boy, whispering something in his little ear and taking the flower from him. The boy giggles at you, his former horror dissipated, instead replaced with a furious blush that spread all the way down his neck and up his ears. He blew you a kiss before skipping away, giddily going back to whatever he was doing beforehand. Your boyfriend turns you around by the shoulders immediately and gives you a harmless glare. “What the fuck was that about?” But he doesn’t get a response, as you just wrap your arms around him and laugh. “You’re so cute when you’re jealous!” Well… that wasnt the answer he was looking for but he’ll take it.

(Ran, Shion, Draken, Benkei, Wakasa)

Sitting back and watching the show. He finds the little kids advances hilarious and will gladly watch the little shrimp try to win you over whilst you’re trying your hardest not to burst out laughing. “So sweets, how old are you anyway?” The boy asks you with a smirk on his face. “Too old for you.” You answer incredulously, just about ready to cry from laughter. “No no no baby, no one has to know! It can just be between the two of us and that’s fineeee!” He draws out the syllables and leans one elbow on table you and your boyfriend are sitting at. Your boyfriend all the while has probably pulled out a phone, discreetly filming the whole thing whilst leaning back and hiding his tears. You shoot both boys an amused look and then answer the awaiting kid. “Come back to me in a few years and maybe we can arrange something, yeah?” The little kids eyes widen as he looks at you with a determined smile. “Yes! You won’t regret it! And I’ll beat up your wannabe boyfie over here once I’m strong enough too!” He exclaims and runs off leaving you howling in laughter and your boyfriend, who is suddenly enraged by a child, fumes silently, sending daggers across the room. “Relax baby.” You reach a hand over the table to hold his, wiping the tears from your eyes. “Don’t touch me.” He hisses and puts the phone down, crossing his arms in fake offense.

(Hanma, Kokonoi, Izana, Rindou)

The false hope typa guy. In this case, the boy made the mistake of coming up to HIM and innocently asking for your name. “Why, you like what you see?” Your boyfriend uses language much too mature for the little kid, but he gets a timid response of “yeah, she’s real pretty..” nevertheless. Your boyfriend chuckles and pats him on the shoulder. “I say go for it, I’m sure you’ve got a chance with her!” The little boy has wide eyes and an open mouth “Really? You sure she doesn’t have some super big ‘n scary boyfriend?” He has to suppress laughter when he answers. “I’m sure she doesn’t, go talk to her, ask her for her name and tell her that I said hi too.” And with that, he’s sent the kid on his way. Your boyfriend watches him shyly go up to you and pat your leg slightly to get your attention. He watches you smile down at the little boy and talk to him, your eyes widening and laughing when you exchange a few words with the kid. When he sees fit, he comes stalking over to the two of you and wraps his arm around your waist and smirks at the kid. “Hey there.” You greet your boyfriend and turn to look at him. “Have you met—“ he guesses that you’re about to introduce him to the little boy but he doesn’t care to listen, and leans down to shush your lips with a long, over-the-top kiss, even going as far as to cracking one eye open to look at the little boys horrified face before finally pulling away. You’re a little dazed and very confused when you look down and find your little admirer gone. You throw your boyfriend an accusing look but he only raises his hands in surrender, claiming innocent with a smug smile on his face.

[beeing1alive]

Hi!! I really liked your "turning them on without knowing" post , I wanted to know if you'd like to write a second one but with Tenjiku!! 🙇🏻‍♀️

Note: Thank you for your enquiry, I was very happy about it and hope you like it

Warning: Nsfw content, minors do not interact

Izana:

Gets a hard-on when you give him a tight hug

He just can't help it, as soon as he feels your warmth and smells your body odour he goes crazy

He doesn't want to let you go and wraps his arms around you even more so that you can feel his pulsating cock

Begins to place feather-light kisses on your neck and throat and asks you if you don't want to help him

Kakucho:

It especially turns him on when you try to tease him with something

I mean, the grin on your face and the galnz in your eyes

He immediately gets butterflies in his stomach and his body starts to tingle with excitement, only that the tingling mainly affects the centre of his body

And before he knows it, he's sitting there with an ever-growing bulge in his trousers

Ran:

Becomes instantly rock hard when you whisper in his ear

It doesn't even matter what you say because, to be honest, in this situation he doesn't care

It's just that as soon as he hears your sweet voice so close to his ear, goose bumps spread all over his body

Try 100% not to hide how you hit on him and will ask you if you can help him with the bulge is trousers

Rindou:

Absolutely loves neck kisses

Just can't help but let out a soft sigh as soon as you're busy with his neck

Pulls you onto his lap so he can kiss you and press his hard cock against your bum

Nevertheless, his cheeks are barely noticeably red all the time, because he's just an idiot for you and can't do anything about it

Shion:

Immediately gets a hard-on when he sees you concentrating

The way your eyes dart across the sheet of paper in front of you and you try to memorise as much as possible with a furrowed brow

Feels the need to sit behind you and look over your shoulder so that you can feel his hard cock

Will indirectly try to distract you from your work and gently rub against your bum, which only makes him hornier...

Here is pt.1

Attention: The characters and the GIF do not belong to me. All credits go to the original owners. If you want anything to be changed or removed, please contact me.

[bontensruby]

No one:

Literally no one:

Bonten! Sanzu: DARLINGGGGG, GUESS WHO'S BACK FROM JAAAAILLLLL!?!?!?!?

[burntmarshmallowchishiya]

Bonten! Sanzu x Fem Y/N Smut Visual

here's the smut visual for Bontens mad dog. also still waiting for a s4 announcement :( i wanna see those suits animated!

Also if these links don't work on your phone u may need to have a twitter account or use a laptop/computer

Warning: choking, fingering, smoking, toy, some slapping, overstimulation and lingerie

Angry sex w/him

giving sanzu a blow job as he is ✌️ you

f*cking yourself on his c*ck as he is busy smoking

overstimulating you with a toy

sir kink with sanzu

how he would eat you out

face-f*cking

when he says "balls deep" he MEANS it

when your dressed pretty for him when he's back from Bonten

return to the masterlist

[sweatytimetravelearthquake]

[apollodarling-writes]

ik this might seem stupid but a scenario where the reader needs lube because they can’t get wet on their own due to antidepressants,, i don’t see it enough, if at all

VARIOUS TOKYO REVENGERS WITH A READER WHO NEEDS LUBE

author note : this isn’t stupid at all !! im so glad you requested this, and im more than happy to provide. you didn’t specify who you wanted, so i kind of just chose some characters tbh,, i hope that was okay, but if not — whenever reqs open again, id be more than happy to write for someone you want.

includes : mikey, mitsuya, chifuyu, kazutora, sanzu.

cws : smutty, fem-bodied reader but no prns used, edging mentions, overstim implications, manhandling, multiple creampie.

mikey

it wouldn’t bother mikey at all — his main focus is your pleasure. he would hate to bring you any pain, nor does he want you to be self conscious about needing lube to get wet.

naturally, he’d try to get you wet of his own accord, paying special attention to your most sensitive spots. mikey would latch onto your clit, his tongue curling around it as his fingers tease your cunt. he’d take his time with you, getting you so, so close before ripping your release away from you.

of course, once he finally decides to let you cum, his digits are curling into your gummy walls as he laps at you — his pace fast and harsh. he’ll make you cum on his tongue before he ever makes you cum on his cock.

even if that doesn’t work in his favor, he won’t ever degrade you or think any less of you for needing lube — just sit back and feel good for him, okay?

mitsuya

mitsuya is similar to mikey, i think. the only difference is that while mikey can be a bit rough with you, mitsuya is very gentle — handling you as if you might shatter beneath him.

he would never mind helping you become wet enough to make love, but even if it doesn’t work, he would reassure you that it doesn’t bother him — that you’re not an annoyance and that he’s still going to make you feel good.

mitsuya is a gentleman, of course, but when he’s making you cum on his tongue over and over, murmuring sweet words of praise into your sopping cunt as he splits you open on his fingers… you can’t help but think he can be a bit cruel sometimes.

chifuyu

chifuyu doesn’t understand at first. he thinks he might be doing something wrong — that he’s not giving you the right attention in the right places, or that maybe you’re not in the mood. you’ll have to explain to him that it’s not something he’s doing wrong, but that your medication prevents you from self-lubricating.

once he understands this though, he will absolutely reassure you that it’s completely okay and that the two of you can always use lube if you need it. he’ll make sure to pay special attention to how you’re feeling, using more if need be. he wants you to feel good with him, and if you need lube to do that, he’s more than happy to accommodate you.

kazutora

kazutora would already understand, having looked up the side effects of your medication once he knew you were taking it. he knows how to make you feel good — he’s a pleasure top after all. he’s very observant too. he’ll watch your expressions to find what feels good and will commit it to memory.

kazutora knows that he’s good at it — which is why he’d already purchased a bottle in advance in the event that you would require it.

sanzu

sanzu already has a bottle on standby. the moment he realizes you’re not wet enough, he’s slathering that shit on you.

sanzu will have one hand gripping his shaft as he spreads the lubricant with his cock, the tip bumping and brushing against your clit, before he’ll slowly sink into your heat. he’ll take his time with you, making sure that you’re not in any pain, and slowly lose himself in the feeling.

sanzu will wrap his fingers around your hips, lifting you slightly off the mattress as he forces you to meet his thrusts — grinding you against his cock. you’ll cum more times than you can count, in more positions than you can remember. you won’t need more lube if he cums inside of you, right?

[sair-png]

–𝚙𝚊𝚢 𝚊𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝙼𝚒𝚔𝚎𝚢'𝚜 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜

[baby-tini]

𝓖𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓑𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓷 𝓽𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓸𝓸

Manjiro Sano- It would be really hard too get the tattoo, muchless surprise him with it. Especially when you're always, either with him or under constant surveillance and one of those people that have eyes on you 24/7 is Sanzu, Mikeys loyal dog. So, there's no way, you're going anywhere and Sanzu or at least one of his executives not know about it. But, if you do manage too slip away unnoticed, you have very little time too get that tattoo, before Mikey tears all of Japan apart looking for you. It'd be best too get the tattoo somewhere it's not's not immediately noticeable, like on the back of your neck, like Mikey has, or in between your breasts. When you do decide too show Mikey though, he'd stare at you for a few seconds, then look at the tattoo and repeat, doing that for a good couple minutes before grabbing you and bending you over the nearest surface and fucking you, keeping his eyes looked on the tattoo as he cums in you. You now belong to Manjiro Sano for life, you can never leave him, the proof is forever inked on your body. Sanzu Haruchiyo- He was actually the one too propose the idea of you getting the tattoo, stating that your love for him should be evidential, should be permanent. There's no going alone or in secret, he's with you constantly and if he can't be, he has cameras and eyes on you constantly, maybe even a little tracking device implant in your neck, but you'll never know that. He'd want you too get the tattoo either on your inner thigh or on your lower back, right above you ass. He'd be the one too find the tattoo artist, which, will 100% be a woman, he refuses too let a man see you like that, muchless touch you, he doesn't care if it's strictly professional, it's not happening, he might even do the tattoo himself honestly. After you get that tattoo, he expects that place too be exposed constantly, if it's on your lower back, you better become very familiar with low-rise pants or if it's on your inner thigh, you're wearing short skirts or shorts forever. He dares someone too look at you, he doesn't mind ruining his clean suit for you, his little angel. Kakucho Hitto- He, in all honestly, would not like it, at all. He doesn't want you involved in any of his work, in anyway. He doesn't even like that the other executives know about you. He knows what having that tattoo means, he signed up for that, but you? You're his perfect little angel, his sweet girl, you don't belong anywhere near a gun or have your ears tainted with the stories of what he's done, especially if you've seen something, you're too good for the life he leads, he wants you away from it as much as possible. So, for you too get that inked on your body, it terrifies him. You can immediately tell how he feels when you show him because his eyes go empty, like he just lost something of great importance. He pleaded with you for minutes too stop joking, please tell him you didn't, please tell him it's fake. When you shake your head no, to all of his worried questions, his voice breaks as he drags you into the bathroom, attempting too rub it off with a rag 'till your skin is raw. Takeomi Akashi- Doesn't keep as much surveillance on you as the others, so it'd be relatively easy too surprise him with the tattoo. Doesn't really care if you get it or not but he would think it's sexy too see it on you in any scenario, sex, housework, cooking, doesn't matter he's staring at it with a smirk. Would want you too get it someone very noticeable, like your chest or on your shoulder, it's easy too just slide your shirt down and stare at it, running his thumb over it as he leaves kisses along the outline of the ink. Likes that you'll forever have proof that you belong to him, it's a warning for everyone too stay the fuck away from you, I will say however, the tattoo and the area around it, are constantly covered in hickies, so much so, that sometimes you can barley see the tattoo.

Ran Haitani- Also another one too propose the idea, jokingly at first, but he grows very excited, in more ways then one, when you agree to the idea. He takes you too get it done, telling you where you should get it, which place would look best. He'd want you too get it on the front of your neck or just under your tits. Doesn't matter where you get it though because that's automatically his new favorite place too cum. He'd always have you in positions where he can see the tattoo, it genuinely makes him cum quicker. With the permanency that you belong to him, gets him hard in seconds, the following week after you get the tattoo, he's constantly having sex with you. Fucking you anywhere and everywhere he can get you, he doesn't care who's around, if he can get a quickie in while he stares at the tattoo, he absolutely will, shamelessly at that. Rindou Haitani- He wouldn't mind if you got the tattoo, wouldn't verbally tell you too get it but he wouldn't be mad if you did it. Especially if you got the tattoo on the front of your neck, like his, but because his brother also has the tattoo, he'd want you too get his name under the tattoo. He wouldn't mind if you just ditched the tattoo idea and just got his name. Thinks it'd be sexy if you got on your hip, especially while you were wearing low-rise shorts, he's have his hands on your hips more then usual, and that's saying something. Where ever you get it though, much like his brother, whenever he sees it, he gets hard rather quickly, eagerly pulling you with him towards a barley private room so he can jerk his dick while eyeing your tattoo. He, and Ran, are also big braggers and would be so cocky about, how much you love him. Kokonoi Hajime- Thinks it's cute that you wanna get the tattoo and play gangster, he knew you wanted too get it when he caught you, multiple times, eyeing his own tattoo. He also has complete access to your search history and call log, so when he found you calling multiple tattoo shops, he knew. He'd let you get the tattoo but he'd want it too be non-permanent, drawing it on you with marker but if you wanted a more.. permanent end-game, he'd take you too get it. He has more then enough money too get it lasered off for you. He'd want you too get it somewhere that it could be easily covered with clothes. Like your thigh or high up on your arm, stating that he didn't need other people too know, he is the only one allowed too see it. He does buy you the best creams and lotions, helping you take care of the tattoo, making sure it doesn't get infected. Kanji Mochizuki- Also another that wouldn't want you too get it, but he's not as reluctant as Kakucho, simply because he sees it in a different light. What Kakucho sees as a magnet for danger, Mochi sees it as a warning to others that you are not meant too be messed with. Would take you too get the tattoo but he'd need some convincing, valid convincing. He'd want you too get it under your collar bone or on your rib cage, somewhere it can be covered but easily accessible to him and for him, only for him. He's got a few pictures of you in his phone, in very compromising positions, with the tattoo being on full display, that's what he uses too get off too when he's away.

[the-atlas-sister]

TᕼEY ᗯᗩᒪK Iᑎ Oᑎ YOᑌ ᑕᕼᗩᑎGIᑎG/ᑎᗩKEᗪ- TOKYO ᖇEᐯ. ᑭᗩᖇT TᗯO

𝙸𝚗𝚌𝚕𝚞𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐… 𝚁𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚘, 𝚁𝚊𝚗, 𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚣𝚞, 𝚂𝚎𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚞, 𝙽𝚊𝚘𝚝𝚘 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝙺𝚊𝚔𝚞𝚌𝚑𝚘

(IM SORRY IF SOME ARE OOC CAUSE- CAUSE I DON'T KNOW ALL THE CHARACTERS ALL TOO WELL)

𝚁𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚘 𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚒

At the beginning of your day you had no idea that your boyfriend would be clinging to you at the end of your date, saying he just wanted to keep you, just for the night.

And how could you deny him with that cocky smirk of his, the one he gave you when he knew that you just couldn't say no to him.

So now here you were, stripping out of your uncomfortable date attire, still aiming to visually please your boyfriend after a year of being together. You shivered slightly as you stood in the bathroom in only your undergarments. You looked down at the pile of clothes Rindo had offered you, noticing that he not so slyly failed to include any shirts.

"Rindo?" you called, pulling on a pail of his loose boxers.

"You ready- woah." You flushed, your face turning hot as Rindo opened the bathroom door- his eyes going wide as he eyed your topless figure.

"You didn't have to barge in, I just need a shirt..." you grumbled, subconsciously covering your chest and torso.

"I kinda like you like this," he chuckled, leaning on the doorframe, making you roll your eyes. "Fine, fine. I'll go grab you a shirt." He laughed slightly with that same stupid smirk you had fallen in love with. You couldn't help but blush as he winked and turned around- seemingly to find you that shirt.

𝚁𝚊𝚗 𝙷𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚗𝚒

Being Rindo Haitani's best friend had a lot of advantages. Roaming through the streets of Tokyo feeling safer then you ever have, getting the opportunity to beat his ass at any game you play together and of course, the opportunity to tease his brother.

Opportunities, like this one for example.

"He- o-oh," Ran said, his eyes going slightly wide as he opened to door to his brother's room, only to find you wearing nothing but your undergarments.

"Yes?" you said, smirking slightly at his flushed cheeks as he not so subtly eyed your naked body.

"I- I was looking for Rindo," Ran said, continuing to stare at your legs and body. "Thought he'd be in here."

"He's in the bathroom," you stated, bending over teasingly to pick up your shirt. You felt Ran's gaze on your ass, making your smile giddily.

"I didn't know you two..."

"We don't," you said quickly. You stood up fully and looked at the taller brother. "We were just messing around in the rain and Rindo let me shower here."

"Oh," Ran hummed, a tone of almost... relief in his voice. "Well, sorry for walking in on you."

"Don't be," you said with a small smile.

Ran smirked back at you before walking out of the room.

𝚂𝚊𝚗𝚣𝚞 𝙷𝚊𝚛𝚞𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚢𝚘

You knew how much Sanzu idolized you. He told you every day, every night and every time in between. But as you stared at your own naked body in the long mirror within your shared bedroom... you just couldn't understand why.

You were having a day where it seemed as though every flaw you saw within yourself was pushing to the front of your mind, all desperate for attention.

You bit you lip lightly as you ran a hand along the skin on your stomach, continuing to graze over your hips.

"What did I get to deserve this?" you heard Sanzu's voice break you from your trance, making you jump slightly. You hadn't even heard the door open. You look at him behind you through the mirror- unable to bear the look of pure admiration shining in his eyes. The scars on his cheeks wrinkled at he smiled at you widely. He threw off his jacket and approached you. His hands replaced your own, quickly wrapping around your stomach and hips. "My perfect girl, naked and waiting for me," he mumbled, placing a soft kiss behind your ear and along the back of your neck.

"Don't say that," you whispered, unable to tear your eyes away from what you saw as the flaws littering your body.

"Hm? Say what? How perfect you are?" Sanzu asked, looking at you in the mirror. "Can't understand how you can't see how beautiful you are, my pretty girl." He continued to kiss the back of your neck and shoulders. "Lemme show you, yeah?"

𝚂𝚎𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚞 𝙸𝚗𝚞𝚒

Living with someone was weird.

This is what you had come to realize after you and Seishu made the decision to move in together. The first few weeks were nice, being able to cuddle to sleep, cook for one another and preform other domestic activities.

It wasn't until you walked in on him pissing for about the third time due to his forgetting to close the door, that you realized how odd it truly felt.

Even after weeks of being in the same of apartment, you had yet to change in front of one another. Hell, you don't know if Seishu has even really seen you naked. Both of you would shyly wander into the bathroom when it came time to change for the day or take a shower.

But now, you figured it would be fine to change in your shared bedroom. Seishu was still at work so it'd probably be fine. Right?

You hadn't even heard the door open when he walked in. You were completely naked, only covered by your underwear. You jumped in surprise when you felt Seishu's hand, rough from working in the shop, grab your own softly. He turned you to face him, his green eyes silently scanning your body.

Your face flushed as he raised your arm slightly, as if he was examining your body.

"Even more beautiful than I imagined," he said softly, hesitantly reaching out to touch the skin of your waist. You shyly looked away, leaning into his touch as you shared this new level of intimacy. "Wanna see more of you," he whispered in your ear, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you flush against his chest.

𝙽𝚊𝚘𝚝𝚘 𝚃𝚊𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚋𝚊𝚗𝚊

Being Takemichi's cousin fucking sucked.

You had no idea how it happened, but you had become wound up in your cousin's time travel. You honestly didn't understand most of it. All you knew is that his future and your present, was constantly shifting and you remembered every bit of it.

The only consistent thing you knew was Naoto Tachibana.

In every changing timeline, Naoto was there. There for your cousin and for you.

Which is how you found yourself within the detective's small apartment. You didn't understand it, but he said with the current timeline, it would be safer for you to stay with him. You currently stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror, wearing an extra pair of his shorts and your bra. You tried to figure out how you had gotten yourself in this situation. Or better yet, how Takemichi had gotten you in this situation.

You snapped from your trance when you heard the door to the bathroom click. You turned to see as Naoto opened the door, his eyes going suddenly wide as his gaze settled on your topless figure.

"S-sorry," he said, clearing his throat a bit and turning to the side, an obvious blush on his cheeks. "You were taking a while. I was worried."

You couldn't help but smile softly at his show of worry. You'd be lying if you said you hadn't developed a crush on the younger man and his worrisome tone made your heart flutter. "I'm okay," you said softly, pulling on his oversized shirt. "I was just thinking about stuff."

"Future stuff?" he asked, finally looking back at you. She somehow looks even better in my clothes, he thought with a small blush.

"Present for us," you chuckled bitterly, looking back at the mirror.

"Right," Naoto nodded. "We could... talk about it when you're done if you'd like."

You smiled back and him and nodded slightly.

𝙺𝚊𝚔𝚞𝚌𝚑𝚘

You had always had a crush on Kakucho. Ever since you could remember knowing him you had. And you knew he had a crush on you as well. It was obvious.

You could tell from the way he watched you play in the rain, or how protective he got simply by someone looking at you the wrong way.

What you didn't understand was why he hadn't confessed. It had been years and yet... nothing. Perhaps it was his more shy demeanor when he was with you. Or perhaps it was Izana being your brother.

Whatever it was... you had had enough.

You inhaled deeply as you paced within Kakucho's room. You wore a pair of short shorts and your bra. Remember the plan, you reminded yourself. You had just stumbled into his home trying to get out of the rain. You had to strip and change clothes to try and get warm. He had said you were always welcome so it should work.

You stiffened as you heard the door to Kakucho's bedroom click open. Regrets and thoughts of what could go wrong flooded your mind as he opened the door. As soon as his eyes landed on you, they grew as wide as saucers. His hand stayed glued to the door handle and he stayed frozen in place.

"I can explain-"

"Naked-" Kakucho choked out, his face turning a shade of red you had never seen before.

"What?" you almost wanted to laugh at his response.

"You're naked- in my bedroom," he continued, his grip tightening on the door handle. His free hand went to his crotch. You raised an eyebrow at the action.

"I was just trying to get out of the rain and I remembered that you said I was always welcome-"

"It's not raining," Kakucho stated, his brows furrowing in confusion.

You mentally cursed yourself for forgetting such a critical detail. "Shit," you mumbled, your face flushing. "Look- I'm sorry-" You quickly collected your shirt and went to walk past Kakucho and out the door.

His hand quickly moved to softly grab your upper arm before you could leave, his gaze remaining straight ahead. You looked up at him with wide and hopeful eyes. "Don't tell Izana," he said softly before pulling you into the room and closing the door behind him.

Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/mooskey/735171493771771904

[gojosoreos]

sketched all my favourite TR boys cause i have so much love for them :’)

[beeing1alive]

Hiii!!! I love your writings I look forward to reading them when I get back from school everyday!!💗 Can you do Toman boys with a girlfriend who literally jumps onto him and lifts her feet off the ground when she gets excited? I think that would be really cute if that’s ok?

Note: I was very happy about your sweet message and I had a lot of fun writing it

He froze for a few seconds, blushing so extremely that they're happy as hell that he can hide his face in your neck. Then he gently put his hands around your hips to lift you up and twirl you around just to hear your sweet giggles. He finds it adorable and would do it again and again.

Angry; Hakkai; Takemichi

He lifts you up and holds you tight to look you in the eye. His eyes sneak over every little inch of your body and he thanks God and whoever else is there in heaven for this wonderful view. It turns him on. And he realises far too late. You notice it immediately and are also blushing slightly before you plant your soft lips on his, kissing him, touching him. Really, it just turns him on even more.

Smiley; Kazutora; Draken

He lets you do it and tries to play it cool, but the glint in his eyes and the blush on his cheeks tell you that it means a lot to him and that he loves it when you do it. Of course he would never admit it. Promise me you'll give him a kiss afterwards because he's slowly thawing out.

Kisaki; Sanzu; Baji

He embraces you warmly, a grin adorning his face. Moments like this with you are the best and he would give his life for you. He twirls you around in the air, only to set you back down on the ground a few minutes later and pulls you right back into a deep hug. Give him a kiss and he'll be happy for the rest of the day.

Mikey; Mitsuya; Chifuyu

Attention: The characters and the GIF do not belong to me. All credits go to the original owners. If you want anything to be changed or removed please contact me.

[xfgpng]

— : [nsfw] mentions of blood, rough sex, slapping

— : kink :: knife play

the cold blade of the knife was placed gently against her stomach, lightly grazing her skin but not enough to leave any permanent marks or actually hurt her.

he was careful, of course sanzu was, this wasn’t the first time he’d done this only the circumstances were far from his usual routine and his intentions weren’t to cause any real damage.

he watched as she lie still on the soft silk sheets, looking up at him like the obedient little thing she obviously wasn’t. he could see the hidden mischief in her pretty eyes.

“you’re so perfect like this” he grins, “so quiet… i almost want to keep you like this all night”

“haru..” she gasps, the thin blade pressing down harder. his eyes glaze over when he sees the tiny droplets of blood. he knows how to do this, he knows she can handle it and if she wanted to stop, she had her safe word or signal.

“what a dirty little thing” he smirks mockingly, “you’re so into this aren’t you?”

she’s about to protest, probably tell him off but he slaps her cheek before gripping her chin with his free hand.

“my dirty little thing” he chuckles darkly, leaning in to kiss her. “i need you”

“please” she nods, “i want it”

“yeah?” he laughs, slapping her cheek again, “you want it?”

“sanzu!” she whines. if there’s one thing she wasn’t ashamed of, was begging. she knew exactly what to say to get her way but some days, like today, sanzu would ignore it in favour of driving her crazy. he loved to watch her break apart knowing he was the one that could put her back together.

“oh poor baby” he laughs, unbuckling his pants, “so fucking needy”

he presses the cold knife against her throat as he slipped inside her. he moaned right against her ear, enjoying the full body shiver.

“i could press it harder and you wouldn’t stop me, would you baby?” he teases and she shakes her head, her eyes squeezing shut as he picked up the pace.

she wouldn’t. she trusted him and he wasn’t sure what that said about either of them but he loved her, regardless of how anyone else viewed their relationship.

“my sweet girl, aren’t you?” he laughs, gripping her waist to pound her harder into the bed. he loved listening to her moan so freely, never ashamed to show him or anyone else really, just how much she loved this… love him.

he flips her onto her stomach, slamming home once again as he tossed the knife to the side. he couldn’t really focus on anything else aside from how good it felt inside her.

“harder” she cried out, gripping the sheets so hard her knuckles turned white, “please”

it was amusing, how he could bring her this much pleasure despite his friends teasing him about his drug habits and not being able to get it up. one look at her and he was ready to go for hours and he didn’t need a drug to assist with that either.

“you feel so fucking good baby” he grunts, slapping her ass, “that’s it, take what you need from me, ride this dick like you own it”

he could tell she was close, quicker than usual and he knows the knife and the empty threats were the reason for it. he knew she was a bit of a masochist and he couldn’t wait to push those limits, see how far he could push her before she couldn’t take it anymore.

they were a perfect match after all.

he picks up the knife and presses it against her throat from behind, holding her up with his other hand. it’s that, that sends her over the edge. she screams so loud as she cums, he knows their neighbours definitely heard.

“shit” he groans, snapping his hips a few more times before he cums.

“haru!” she frowns, slumping forward, “i told you it’s gonna be messy”

“shut up you damn brat” he slaps her ass again, wincing as he pulls out. “you okay over there?”

“hm” she nods, “give me 5 minutes and i can go again”

he laughs, his head tossing back. she really was just as insatiable as he was.

[aleapple1216]

ToMan in the last TimeSkip

So, photos of the latest Tokyo Revengers exhibition are already leaking out. This is the layout of TOMAN after the last time skip BEFORE THEY FIGHT BLACK DRAGONS AND TENJIKU.

Leader: Sano Manjiro (Mikey) Second in command: Bakamichi (NO I'M NOT INSULTING HIM, THEY LITERALLY WROTE BAKAMICHI AND DRAW HIM THAT WAY) Vice-captain: Ryuuguji Ken (Draken)

Strategist: Tetta Kisaki Assistant: Hanma Shuuji

1st Division Captain: Keisuke Baji Vice Captain: Chifuyu Matsuno

2nd Division Captain: Takashi Mitsuya Vice-captain: Hakkai Shiba

3rd Division captain: Haruki Hayashida (Pah-chin) Vice captain: Ryohei Hayashi (Peh-yan)

4th Division Captain: Kazutora Hanemiya Vice-captain: Atsushi Sendo (Akkun) YES, AKKUN

Captain of the 5th division: Haruchiyo Akashi Vice Captain: Senju Akashi

6th Division Captain: Nahoya Kawata (Smile) Vice Captain: Souya Kawata (Angry)

[sleepynoons]

In Another Life

You get unjustly kidnapped by Bonten because your ex-boss fucking sucks. Ran saves your ass but leaves Sanzu with the responsibility of watching over you. All you want is to be alive and happy with your child. But does Sanzu even care about protecting you? And if he does, do you… care about him? What happens if he wants to become a part of your family?

Will you let him into your life?

bonten!sanzu x afab!f!reader, nsfw, 18+

word count: ~9,600

cw: manga spoilers, single parenting/single parent!au, explicit language, suggestive content, depictions of violence/pain/injuries/drugs/alcohol/etc., mentions of domestic violence + abusive relationships, hurt/no comfort

notes: lmk if i missed anything in the warnings. cross-posted on ao3. this story means a lot to me, i hope you'll give it a try.

edit: tysm for 100+ notes y'all are making me cry, really appreciate all the support <333

SANZU LEAVES the bakery with a few bags of dorayaki tucked underneath his arm. He’s running ahead of schedule – he still has half an hour before Mikey expects him –, so he meanders through Tokyo's network of dark alleyways and hidden shortcuts.

He walks and walks and walks, letting his feet guide him wherever. He’s been working in the streets for long enough. He’ll know how to find his way back to Bonten’s headquarters no matter where he ends up.

He makes a left turn, a sharp right, two more left turns, until he hears the buzz of a nearby shopping district. He follows the sounds of people hustling about and finds a narrow path between two shops to slip through. He can see people walking by at the end of the path, but he doesn’t enter the busy streets, opting to observe and watch the crowds fluctuate instead.

And then he sees you. Clad in a flowing beige dress with a white t-shirt layered underneath, you’re staring off into the distance as the wind ruffles your hair. You’re laughing at something or someone, but as he tries to get a better look at you, a rush of shoppers streams past and blocks his view.

He slips a cigarette out of his back pocket, lights it, and breathes out a puff of smoke as he chuckles. When he glances back into the crowd, you’re gone. He turns around to retrace his haphazard path. Mikey likes his dorayaki warm.

–

Two weeks later, when Mikey’s supply of dorayaki has dwindled to a dangerous low, Sanzu returns to the usual bakery, accompanied by Ran this time.

The two are close colleagues, though Sanzu thinks “close” is too intimate of a description. Sanzu likes to keep people at arm's length away. Close enough to build cohesive, mechanical teamwork but not enough to skip pleasantries and create personal connections.

Sanzu is outside of the bakery, scrolling through his phone and tapping his foot as he waits for Ran. The latter always liked taking his time, and Sanzu’s patience was wearing thin. Luckily, his colleague walks out a few moments later. Sanzu is about to shoot a snarky comment when he notices that Ran is conversing with a woman.

It takes a few moments for Sanzu to remember who you are.

“Sanzu!” Ran calls happily. “Can you unlock the car?” Sanzu rolls his eyes before he slips the car keys out of his pocket. “Oh, and let me introduce you!”

You bow, offering your name and a few compliments to Sanzu’s suit. You wear a neat smile as you wait for his response. Sanzu, too, says his name and a brief “thank you,” all while avoiding eye contact.

Ran continues, “She goes to this shop regularly, as well. I wonder why we’ve never met before.” You nod in agreement before dismissing yourself, bidding the two a good rest of their day.

As Sanzu and Ran drive back to headquarters, Ran asks, “You know her?”

Sanzu groans before curtly responding, “No.” Ran hums, a smirk tugging at his lips, but does not press his pink-haired colleague any further.

It’s not like Sanzu was lying. He didn’t know you. He just saw you sometimes, and neither of you bothered to say anything when you did see each other.

However, after this interaction, you and Sanzu begin to cross paths frequently, always at the bakery every other Saturday at 8 AM sharp, when the dorayaki are almost out of the oven and the toasted pastries are being shelved.

Sanzu notices the pastries, such as the mango croissants and berry-filled sandwiches, because he always lets you order at the counter first. You always buy a lot. You carry at least two bags of food home, yet you never struggle with the weight.

He also notes the smooth lilt of your voice when you speak with the bakers. You seem to know the staff well, and he finds himself entranced by the highs and lows of your giggles, sassy retorts, and sincere praise.

You speak in the same sweet manner with him, which initially surprised him until he remembered that you aren’t aware of his occupation or lack of a moral compass. Although your exchanges are limited to questions of “How are you?” and “Any plans for today?”, he finds himself relaxing and basking in the casual nature of your exchanges. Usually, he replies to strangers with one or two words, but he comes to appreciate your lighthearted aura and matches the flow of the conversation.

And when the two of you part ways, you always say goodbye with a full smile, and with a few waves of your hand, you cross the street and disappear from his line of vision.

But Sanzu is not a consistent man (aside from his unwavering loyalty to Mikey), and his routines are often disrupted or forgotten. So when Sanzu finds you in one of Bonten’s warehouses, he mentally chides himself for being caught off guard. He switches gears and replaces his agitation with doubt and suspicion.

“What’s going on?” Sanzu asks Takeomi. His older brother huffs out a puff of smoke while handing him a thin laminated folder of photos and information.

As Sanzu flips through the documents, Takeomi speaks. “A client tried to rat us out. We captured a few of his employees to see if anyone knows anything.”

Sanzu hands the folder back before redirecting his gaze onto the kneeling employees. There are five in total – some of them shivering from the cold, others frightened still, all duct taped across the mouth. He narrows in on you for a second, observing the creases in your forehead and the tears that slip down your cheeks. His hands twitch.

“Did we get anything yet?” Sanzu asks again.

“Nothing so far. It’s a shame that we’ll have to kill them off,” Takeomi replies, though there’s very little remorse in his voice. It can’t be helped, Sanzu thinks, but he feels disappointment course through his body. He ponders on a compromise but drops the idea. Work is work, and you are no exception to Bonten’s procedures. All witnesses had to be killed, and Sanzu is not one to disobey Mikey’s orders.

But not all of the executives are as stringent as he is. Ran and Rindou saunter into the warehouse, and of course, the older Haitani bursts out with a joyful greeting when he sees you. You startle at his presence, and Sanzu can tell your shock and disbelief when your eyes widen. If your mouth wasn’t forced shut, your jaw would’ve dropped open as well.

Ran walks over to you and begins to untie the ropes binding your wrists, knees, and ankles.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Takeomi yells. A few ashes from his cigarette drift to the floor.

“Can we keep this one?” Ran yells back. “I like them!” Takeomi only scowls, peering at Mikey’s back. After waiting for a few moments, Bonten’s leader doesn’t react, and Ran smiles gleefully. Sanzu releases a breath he doesn’t remember holding. He reminds himself to maintain professionalism again. However, the more he stares at you panting and heaving, the more overcome he is by an itching need to take you somewhere far, far away.

“No.” He blurts without thinking, surprising Ran and Takeomi.

“Uh, sorry?”

“No, we’re not keeping her.” Ran knows not to argue against Bonten’s No. 2, but he huffs and crosses his arms, a scowl on his face.

“Then what else can we do to make sure she doesn’t say anything if we can’t kill her?” Takeomi asks. Sanzu doesn’t have an answer.

After discussing with Mikey, Takeomi, and Kakucho, Sanzu is tasked with the responsibility of checking in on you every two days. You aren’t opposed to the idea – not that you have a choice –, and you are escorted home by Sanzu soon after being notified of your release.

During the drive home, Sanzu asks you questions, gathering information and noting interesting tidbits. You’re the same age as him, a simple employee of a large corporation with a corrupt Board of Directors, and, to his surprise, have a five-year-old daughter.

While Sanzu has acquired many skills fit for a criminal, negotiating and speaking tactfully has yet to be something he is capable of.

“And the father?”

You glance out the window. “Ran away.”

“Why?”

You shrug. He clicks his tongue.

“Can I ask a question, if you don’t mind?” you ask.

After a few seconds of silence, you continue, “What’s going to happen to my coworkers?”

“They’re dead.”

The rest of the ride is silent, as well as the walk up to the third floor of your apartment complex. Sanzu needed to know where you lived, and the easiest way was to escort you to your home. However, before you slip inside your room, you turn around to face him.

Sanzu freezes.

Your eyes are fierce, an icy flame burning in your eyes. Your pupils dilate, more color than white, and you glare at him for a few moments. Then, in a level – almost cold and condescending – voice, you say, “My daughter will be protected.” Sanzu swallows, surprised at your intensity, before nodding once. You smile at his affirmation, though it doesn’t reach your eyes, and bid him farewell.

–

As promised, Sanzu visits you every two days. Most of the time, he simply drops by in the morning before you leave for work and says a quick greeting. You usually rush to the door from the kitchen, wearing a black apron covered with flour and powdered sugar. On Saturdays, the two of you visit the bakery together.

“Where’s your kid?” he asked once.

“Oh, I sent her to daycare already.”

“Even on the weekends?”

“She used to only stay for the mornings, but now she stays until lunch.” Sanzu is about to inquire about the change before it clicks.

“I must be keeping you,” he mutters and rubs his nape. Sanzu rarely apologizes, even implicitly, but he’d never wish for a child to suffer from neglect as he did.

“No, no, not at all! My daughter loves the daycare and her friends there. Besides, I like our time together.” You pat his shoulder before wrapping your hands around one of his. “You make my Saturday mornings.”

The way you effortlessly say “together” and hold his hand baffles him. He’s part of a major yakuza group. He killed your coworkers. By pure association, you and your daughter would forever be in danger. Furthermore, even if Sanzu wasn’t a higher-up in Bonten, it’s not like he’s an upstanding individual with a healthy lifestyle.

Sanzu had his fair share of relationships, though they were all very noncommittal and ended as soon as he shot them in the head. It’s not like he wanted to kill them, but whenever he was caught on the couch doing drugs, they always threatened to report him, and he didn’t want to waste time behind bars. Besides, he never considered a single one of them as a lover.

While you showed a lack of shock or discomfort whenever he visited on his more… spent mornings, Sanzu knew you would be no different. Out of best interests of both of you, Sanzu knew he should keep his distance.

But that’s kind of hard to do when you see someone so often, and Sanzu doesn’t realize it until Mikey calls him over.

“Sanzu, what’s this?” Hand steadying the tsuka of his katana, Sanzu turns around and faces his boss, who is sitting behind an ebony wood desk. A brown paper bag dangles from Mikey’s fingertips.

“Is that not dorayaki?” Mikey pulls out a large cream puff covered in powdered sugar and condensed milk.

Sanzu’s eyes widen. His job is to follow Mikey’s orders as they are delivered. Providing excess was as shameful as underperforming.

“My apologies, I must have grabbed it by accident.”

“I never knew you liked sweets.”

I don’t, Sanzu thinks. But he sure as hell knows who does.

“Do you want me to get more dorayaki tomorrow?”

Mikey looks at the clock before he tosses the bag into Sanzu’s unexpecting hands.

“You’re done for tonight.” Sanzu’s heart weighs a ton, acting almost akin to a kicked puppy. He has strived for years to become his boss’ right-hand man, yet he has failed at one of his most basic, routine tasks. “And bring more of those cream puffs in the morning.” Sanzu nods, refusing to disappoint Mikey further, and leaves the office to head toward the garage.

In the driver’s seat, the executive pulls out his phone. It wouldn’t hurt to try, he thinks. He calls you. It rings for a few moments, but you eventually pick up with a soft “Sanzu?”.

“I’m heading over to your place,” and he’s backing out.

Sanzu’s not sure why he’s in a rush. Probably ‘cause of Mikey, he convinces himself. But he’s also aware of the time. It’s a little past midnight, so your kid’s probably asleep.

When he appears in front of your entrance, he doesn’t even need to ring the buzzer before you throw the door open.

“Is something wrong?!” You’re heaving, hair messy from sleep and blue-light glasses slipping from the arch of your nose.

“I should be asking you that,” Sanzu replies.

“You’re the one who called me and said that you were coming over with no context! Is something wrong?” Your cheeks are flushed with exasperation, and he can’t help but stare at you with slight amusement. Sanzu gestures to come in, and you scramble to get out of the way.

“Your kid,” he says as he takes off his shoes, “what’s her name again?”

“Chizu.” You’re really glaring at him now, with cheeks puffed out, and Sanzu thinks this entire situation is comedic. “Why are you asking me that?”

“You know, people would usually ask why before answering.” He takes another glance at your stiff figure before continuing. “Anyway, I accidentally bought a cream puff from the bakery this morning, and I remember you telling me once that Chizu enjoyed these.”

“That’s all?”

Sanzu hums in affirmation.

You relax, relieved that it isn’t an emergency and even a little touched that he remembered what you said. Before you can thank the pink-haired man, a door cracks open.

Your little girl whines. “Mommy, you’re loud.”

“Oh, sorry, sweetheart. I was just doing some paperwork in the kitchen. I’ll be more careful, alright?” You crouch down to embrace your daughter, but your shoulders aren’t wide enough to hide Chizu’s line of sight from Sanzu.

As a result, the little girl is wide awake. She wriggles out of your hug, darts under your open arms, and speeds toward the man.

“What’s your name?”

Sanzu looks at you, and you grimace with a weak apology. Sighing, he squats down and decides to indulge the little girl.

“My name is Haruchiyo. It’s nice to meet you, Chizu.” Your daughter gasps in delight, excited that this stranger already knows her.

“How do you know my name? Who told you?”

Sanzu chuckles at her awe. “Your mom always talks about you.”

“So you’re Mommy’s friend? I thought Mommy doesn’t have friends.” You cringe a little.

“Your mom is very proud of you, so be nicer to her, alright?” Sanzu tries to pat the little girl’s head but ruffles her hair instead. He then gets up and ambles toward the door.

Taking his cue, you also rise and shuffle towards the door. “It’s getting late, Chizu. Go back to bed.”

Before the two of you even notice, Chizu’s tugging at Sanzu’s slacks, little balls of fists wrinkling the fabric. “Haru, stay!” Sanzu struggles to hide his annoyed groan, and you struggle to convince your daughter to let go.

“Haru, stay! You’re Mommy’s friend, so you have to stay!” Chizu’s whining transforms into loud pleas, and when she gets this way, you know the only way to appease her is to give her what she wants.

“Haru…,” you mouth. “One night wouldn’t hurt, would it?”

Sanzu shoots you a deadpan look, and you return with a steady one.

Finally, he gives. Chizu’s sobs were grating his ears, and driving back to his cold and empty condo was just not worth the effort.

“Stop spoiling the brat,” he mutters through gritted teeth as the two of you lead Chizu back to her room.

–

You haven’t woken up next to someone in years. Chizu is already 5-years-old, meaning it has been almost six years since your ex-boyfriend left you.

It’s early, sometime between four and five in the morning. Sanzu is snoring next to you, and you’re extremely tempted to brush out his bangs. You’re unsure if your need to touch the man comes from a place of genuine attraction or of chronic loneliness. So you settle down and decide to admire him as you wait for sleep to take over once again. You notice that Sanzu looks like he’s in pain when he’s asleep.

–

Sanzu hasn’t woken up next to someone in years. He never let any of his previous girlfriends stay the night (probably another reason why they always wanted to break up).

It’s early, probably a little past seven. Much of his job and Bonten’s activities happened at night, so he usually would never wake up until afternoon the next day. He only wakes up at nine in the morning every other Saturday.

You’re sleeping on your side, one arm folded into your chest and the other draped over the blanket. He wonders how you’re breathing because half of your face is smothered into the pillow, but he doesn’t question it because you’re constantly exceeding his expectations. Sanzu feels the urge to get up and cover your dangling leg with more of the blanket. Yet he decides against it; jostling the bed might wake you up. So he waits for sleep to take over once again.

–

The next time the two of you meet is two days later in the lobby of your apartment complex. Sanzu spots you first and waits for you to notice him. You do a few moments later, after shuffling a crumpled folder into your shoulder bag. You manage a weak smile and try to smooth down the wrinkled front of your blazer as you shuffle over to his side.

You greet, “Late night?”

Sanzu snorts. “Always.” You wait. You’ve always thought Sanzu’s eyes are a gorgeous shade of blue, but you have a much clearer view as the man stares at you. It’s an electrifying, piercing blue – bright and almost neon. “The boss wants to see you.”

You choke. And barely manage to sputter, “Boss? You mean, your boss?”

“He wants to know how to bake bread.”

“Oh.”

Very normal. Your average neighborhood (and potentially national) yakuza boss wants to bake. Just another day.

Next thing you know, you’re in front of a large apartment building that screams elitism from the gold engravings on the steel fence to the three large cherub fountains in the center of the courtyard.

“This is where the boss stays most of the time.” As the two of you ride to the top floor of the complex, Sanzu explains to you that this entire section of the prefecture is owned by Bonten. Many of the executives live here or nearby for ease of communication, as Tokyo is the organization’s center of operations.

Given all of that information, you expected more… grandeur. There should have been dozens of guards, weapons out in plain moonlight, and security checks to prevent you from exposing Bonten.

As soon as the elevator door opens, Ran rushes over and waves enthusiastically. “Good to see you again!” he exclaims.

You wave in return and take his hand, following his lead as he guides you to the entrance of Mikey’s home. Sanzu trails behind the two of you, accompanied by another man who has the same tattoo as Ran.

“You know, I would’ve never expected the boss to be interested in cooking! Mikey is a disaster in the kitchen – actually, he’s horrible at housework in general. All of us executives have to clean up after him,” Ran says.

Again, you assumed Mikey’s home would be rich with glamor and sparkle. But the interior is quite minimalist, or rather, it’s empty. You try your best to listen to Ran, but your eyes wander around. From the entrance, aside from a leather couch and a glass dining table, there are no other decorations or items with sentimental value in sight.

Approaching the living room, you are faced with four more men. They offer stiff nods before glancing over at the hunched figure sitting in front of the kitchen island.

“Boss,” Sanzu calls.

No response.

Still nothing.

Not a word or move.

You suck in a breath. You speak in as steady of a voice as you can. “Thank you –”

You feel the second-in-command glare holes into you as he threatens, “Stop –”

“Let her finish.”

You glance at the figure. “Thank you for having me.” A few moments of silence pass, and you ask, “What kind of bread would you like to eat?”

“Mikey wants to bake,” Sanzu grits out through clenched teeth.

“I know.” You turn around and give him a stern glare before looking back at the boss. “But it’s important to make something you want to eat. Isn’t that the point?”

Mikey slides out of his chair. With bated breath, you watch as he meanders towards you, head bowed and hands tucked into his pant pockets.

“Cream puffs.” Mikey’s voice is quiet and low. Smooth but gravelly and rough whenever he finishes a sentence.

Cream puffs aren’t a type of bread, you think. But of course, you’d never say that out loud.

“Cream puffs sound wonderful.” You smile, even though you know Mikey can’t see you. “We should get started then.”

“Well,” Ran interrupts, “we don’t have any ingredients.”

You spin around. “We don’t have anything?”

Ran shakes his head.

“Sanzu.” You turn toward the pink-haired executive. “Do you think food appears out of thin air?”

“Huh? Of course not – What the actual –”

“I’ll text you a list of things we need. Go to the grocery store. Now.”

Sanzu spews confused curses and retorts at you as Ran laughs and drags him out of the apartment. The other executives trail behind, sharing an unspoken understanding that nothing will be accomplished unless they go, too.

Only you and Mikey remain. The latter stands in front of you as you text Sanzu ingredients. You even momentarily forget about the boss as you mutter under your breath and cross-check your list with other recipes.

Mikey watches. But Mikey has never been one to beat around the bush.

He says your name after you send the text.

“Yes?”

“You can be with Sanzu, as long as he prioritizes his work.”

Though you are confused, you opt to nod.

“Be prepared to lose him.”

Mikey pulls out his phone from another pocket and dials a number. “I’m going to sleep. Take her home.”

Throughout the rest of the evening, you repeat Mikey’s words over and over again in your head, flipping them inside out, bending them backward and forward. Mikey’s words are like a shiny coin. You examine the contents of its surface and circumference, searching for a deeper meaning - was there a secret message? a signal or nuance? - if it even existed.

I can’t lose him if I never had him, you think. It’s been a few months since that evening in the icy warehouse, and you’re acutely aware that Sanzu has eased his way into your life. You make his morning coffee (with no sugar and soy milk) along with yours, and during the times when he checks in on you at night, he stays in the car as you pick up your daughter. As a result, even Chizu has taken an extreme curiosity toward the man, and Sanzu has to stay over until the little girl falls asleep. Most of the time, Sanzu half-heartedly listens to Chizu’s chattering, but if he’s feeling generous (which you can tell when he lets your daughter cling onto him), he also reads her a bedtime story or two.

You realize: Losing Sanzu wouldn’t just hurt you – it would also damage Chizu, and she was already being bullied for having a single mother.

Recently, thinking about Chizu has left you feeling a little restless. Don’t get it twisted – you’re damn proud of yourself. You have a comfortable, plush home, enough nutritious food for three meals every day, and Chizu’s going to attend a well-established elementary school next year. You’ve done well, and you know some things are out of your control, but your accomplishments can’t always shield you from negativity and doubt. Sometimes, you think, it’d be nice if you had someone to lean on.

–

“What’s going on?” You notice that Sanzu’s fingers are tapping erratically on the steering wheel. He’s also glaring at the red light. “Well? Out with it,” he sneers.

“Chizu’s getting bullied.”

A vein appears on Sanzu’s temple, and you’re not sure if you should be more intrigued or scared by his reaction.

He curses and says, “Let me guess. The kids find it weird she doesn’t have a dad?” Your silence is all the affirmation he needs as the light turns green, and he makes the left turn to Chizu’s daycare.

When you buckle Chizu into her booster seat, Sanzu turns around.

“Kid.”

Chizu stops her chattering. “My name’s Chizu.”

“Squirt, if the other kids pick on you for only having a mom, tell them that you’re goddamn proud that she’s your mom, alright?” Chizu nods enthusiastically and pecks your cheek. “Also,” Sanzu continues, “just say that I’m your dad. That’ll shut ‘em up.”

“OK!”

You panic. You hurry back to your seat, and as Chizu babbles about her day, you look at Sanzu with concerned eyes. He gives you one unbothered side glance, and his eyes are trained back on the road.

The two of you don’t talk until a little past one in the morning. You finished up some last-minute tasks, and Chizu is in deep sleep. To avoid waking her up, though, you usher Sanzu into your bedroom, only leaving the door open by a crack just in case.

“Why did you tell Chizu you’re her dad?”

“To get the other brats to zip it.”

“Do you know what it means to be a dad?”

Sanzu thinks for a moment. “No, but at least I know what a dad shouldn’t be.”

You touch a hand to his cheek. “I see. You don’t have to explain if you…”

Sanzu’s lost in thought, deciding whether or not to tell you.

The man sighs. “I had a younger sister. Her name was Senju, and she was just as annoying and clingy as Chizu. We were raised by our older brother – you saw him at Mikey’s place, the man with the large facial scar. I hate to admit it, but when Senju was around, it felt like we were a family.

“Looking back, I think the reason why Senju was so needy was because our parents were never around. I don’t give a shit about trauma or whatever, but it makes sense. She just wanted someone to care for her. We didn’t get bullied for it, though, because our older brother would throw cigarette butts at whoever tried to, and besides, our neighborhood was full of broken families and kids. Chizu’s just a fucking loud twat, so she needs someone to defend her.

“I’m not saying you’re a shitty mom, but you’re busy. You can’t defend your kid if you’re nose-deep in work 24/7.”

“Sure,” you say. You choose your next words carefully. “But… how is a Bonten executive like you any different?”

“I’ll just be a big, scary dog. I’m not actually going to be Chizu’s dad.”

“That’s not what you told her, though.”

“Huh?”

“You told Chizu that you’ll be her dad. She’s going to think you’re going to stay around and act like the father figure she never had.” You reach out and pinch Sanzu’s arm. “Don’t go back on your word.”

Sanzu swats away your hand and, with a clenched jaw, acquiesces. “Fine.”

–

You’ve never been good with confrontation. Confrontation made you lose your ex-boyfriend and all the support from your family, and you were never really good at it anyway. If anything, you prefer time to wash all the tension away and resolve things. But the present issue is entirely new to you, and your impulse is split between wanting to scream your emotions at a plaster wall or burying them so deep that even you would eventually forget they existed.

It’s been two weeks since Sanzu declared himself as Chizu’s father. Since then, both of you have decided on rules and boundaries and resumed your daily routines. The only difference is that Sanzu spends all of his free time with you and your daughter, meaning he’s over more often. As a result, you’ve only become more and more aware of the Bonten executive, and you fear that you’re overexerting your heart.

There’s no way you could tell Sanzu what you’re experiencing. You’re worlds apart, you remind yourself. Despite your gentle chiding, the side of you that wants to confess and lay out everything to Sanzu only grows stronger with each passing day. So what do you do? How do you manage all the butterflies, goosebumps, and icy hot chills that appear at the mere thought of Sanzu?

You throw yourself into work.

It’s fall in Japan, which means job-hunting season. After very little consideration and hesitation, you go job-searching. Spending hours researching, revising your resume, and developing your portfolio were practical and easy ways to divert your attention, and after two months of cold-emailing and passing interviews, you land a stellar job as a marketing manager for an expanding restaurant chain.

Not only did you get to work a job that combined two of your main passions, but the paychecks are also heftier. That night, to celebrate the wonderful news, you crack open a can of beer as Chizu sleeps. Just a small reward, you think smugly.

“You drink?”

You glance at the door where Sanzu is untying his loafers as you chug down your second glass. You hum a little, which echoes inside the cup.

“Let me have some.” Before you can contest, Sanzu swipes the beer can and swallows the remaining liquid before letting out a relieved sigh. He then stalks to your fridge, pulls out four more cans, and sets them down at the dining table.

Usually, you would’ve snarled at anyone who touched your drinks. You rarely drink, so your stash is always limited to your favorites. With a shrug, you let Sanzu off - only because you’re in a good mood.

As you refill your glass, you ask, “You’re back early. Is something wrong?”

“None of your business.”

You’ve come to realize that when Sanzu says that, he doesn’t mean it in a rude manner. Taking it literally, he’s right. None of the work he does is legal or ethical, and hearing about the number of people he killed today would ruin your mood immediately.

“Why are you drinking?” he grunts.

You smirk before replying, “I got a new job. It’s also close to Chizu’s daycare, so we don’t have to rush to pick her up. If you can’t drive us, we can always fetch a cab home.” Sanzu mumbles something, but it’s muffled as he downs another large gulp.

At this point, both of you are a little tipsy. You giggle at Sanzu’s slurred stories of his middle school days, and he listens to you as you share memories of when Chizu was a toddler.

“You know,” he says, “you’re so much more different from what I imagined.”

“How so?”

“When I first saw you, I thought you were just this little pretty thing. You were wearing this white dress or whatever, and you were just standing there under the sunlight.” You have no idea what he’s talking about.

You feel a little more sober. “Are you… disappointed now that you’ve gotten to know me better?”

Sanzu perks up at your question and shakes his head from side to side, over and over again. You throw your head back and laugh. He’s adorable when he’s inebriated.

“I like independent women,” Sanzu says.

You don’t know if it’s the alcohol or the fact that Sanzu isn’t looking you unabashedly in the eye like he normally does, but you slide to the edge of your seat and lean your head on his shoulder.

As expected, Sanzu tenses up and shoots you a hesitant glare. Somewhere in the back of your head, you know that you’re playing with fire, but you’ve given up on lying to yourself a long time ago. You like Sanzu, you want him, and all you need right now is closure.

Finally, you ask, “Do you like me?” You wait for Sanzu to shrug you off, to bark a clear rejection, and to leave your home. But a few moments pass, and the silence enables you to hear his shallow breaths. When he continues to remain still, you look up at him.

Instead of seeing a scowl, Sanzu’s face is flushed pink, and the tips of his ears are a cherry red.

“Sanzu?” you breathe.

Nothing.

“Don’t tell me that you’re so drunk that you have paralysis.”

You get out of your seat and head towards the bathroom to grab a warm towel. You pout as you wring the towel out. You were expecting a straightforward answer from Sanzu, but his lack of one is getting your hopes up.

When you return, Sanzu is slightly hunched over while he scrolls through his phone.

“Are you feeling better?” You approach the pink-haired man. He looks up, and you take this chance to hold his chin up with one hand and wipe his forehead with the other. Sanzu sits there, unmoving and basking in the warmth and gentleness of your hold.

Sanzu decides to act when you begin to retract your hands. He reaches for the wrist holding the wet towel and pulls you in until you’re standing between his legs.

“I do.” He speaks so calmly yet so confidently, and it takes you a few seconds to process.

A wave of relief, sadness, and adoration overwhelms you. You don’t realize you’re crying until you feel the rough pads of his fingers wipe at the corner of your eyes. You blubber an apology or two, but you only begin to sob harder. Still vigilant of Chizu, though, you attempt to muffle yourself by placing the towel over your mouth.

Sanzu pulls you onto his lap and continues to brush away your tears. His expression hasn’t changed, but it’s the most serious he’s ever looked in front of you, and that’s all it takes for you to break down and hand him the broken pieces of your heart.

–

You wake up with a gasp. You sit up, accidentally throwing off the arm that’s wrapped around your shoulders, and gulp deep breaths.

Sanzu wakes up, too, and groans unhappily.

“What are you doing?” he croaks. “Go back to bed.”

“I would -” You cough a little and rub at your throat. “I would if someone wouldn’t hold onto me for dear life.” You continue to gulp deep breaths before you lie back down. This time, Sanzu’s arm slips down and wraps itself around your waist, dispelling your disgruntled expression. He mumbles something along the lines of “Better now?”, and you nuzzle your nose into the crook of his neck in return.

Sanzu yawns. “Is Chizu staying home today?”

“She has a sleepover tonight, so I’ll drop her off in the afternoon.” You’re falling back asleep so your voice trails off at the end of your sentence.

Sanzu is, too, but he manages to say, “I’m glad she’s having fun,” before he’s out like a light.

Because Chizu was out for the weekend, you spent your Saturday grocery shopping and deep cleaning the apartment. Sanzu was also busy with work, but he said he would be back at night.

Just the notion of the two of you being alone makes you nervous, and you slip a few times on the wet kitchen floor when you lose yourself in the thought. You’re excited and nervous, eager and yearning, but hesitant and self-conscious. A large part of Bonten’s operations occurred in underground nightclubs and bars, so Sanzu has seen his fair share of charming girls. You’ve never been insecure about your body, even after having Chizu, but the possibility that you can’t compete with Sanzu’s previous flings sends a nauseating ache to the pit of your stomach.

When Sanzu arrives just in time for dinner, the anxiety persists, but you’re grateful that he doesn’t seem to notice. In fact, Sanzu acts normal. He complains about his colleagues and the inflation of gas prices; he cusses and mutters colorful insults at the coffee table when he stubs his toe; and most importantly, he only touches you when you initiate.

That’s something you never expected from him, truth be told. Sanzu, though caring in his ways, is brutish. Demanding. While you hoped he wouldn’t take you by force, he hasn’t asked you for any physical affection, and you like to take pride in the fact that he treats you with unspoken respect. Only when you reach your arm out onto the dinner table does he hold his hand out to intertwine your fingers together. When you’re watching some comedy show on the bed, he ruffles your hair when you poke his shoulder. Even after kissing him, he simply holds your hip before letting you go as you pull away.

“Did that feel alright?” you whisper.

Why do you feel so ashamed? You’ve kissed people before. You’ve been loved before. So why is it that you can’t bear to look at Sanzu?

Sanzu lets out a snort and proceeds to kiss you again.

“Did that feel alright?” he mocks, smirk and snark crystal clear in his voice. “Of fucking course it did.”

To others, his response could’ve been entirely inappropriate. To you, however, it was hilarious. You crack up, letting out staccato huffs of laughter, and you feel the corners of your eyes crinkle up.

“Now you know how ridiculous you sound,” he says. Sanzu chuckles under his breath before setting your laptop on the night table and moving you over so that he’s now hovering over your body.

He asks, “What else are you worried about?” He’s still smirking, confident in his ability to rid you of your worries, and your self-esteem begins to return as well.

“I was just overthinking,” you admit. You gesture a little bit, trying to find the right words to explain, but you end up smiling sheepishly at Sanzu.

Sighing, he shakes his head and pinches at your cheeks. “Don’t.”

You laugh again and encircle your arms around his neck, pecking him to express your gratitude. But this time, his hand sneaks up your back and holds you at the base of your head. Unable to move, your eyes widen in surprise, and you release a cry that gets swallowed by his lips and tongue. Sanzu continues to steal your breath and voice, and when he releases you minutes later, you’re stunned silent.

You feel light-headed, and the burning in your cheeks and inner thighs is growing hotter with every passing second. Sanzu observes your flushed face for a second before he grins, diamonds creasing into dimples.

“Look at you,” he mutters, “all riled up.” He searches for your eyes until you two are looking at each other. “Let me eat you up, angel.”

Your breathy plea is all he needs before he pulls you in for another heated kiss.

–

Sanzu is greeted with a shrill whistle.

“Someone’s glowing today.”

Sanzu side-eyes Ran but continues his brisk walk to the conference room.

“So when did the two of you get together?” Ran probes with one eyebrow quirked. “She’s a really sweet girl. I hope you’re taking care of her.”

Sanzu grunts and opens the door. Most of the Bonten executives were in their assigned seats around a round table, save for him and Ran.

“Let’s start,” Takeomi says as he taps the spine of a binder twice on the table. A map is already projected onto a whiteboard, and certain regions are circled in red. “There have been a few fights in Kabukicho these past two weeks, and some club owners want us to increase security. I’ll designate oversight of this area to Rindou and Kakucho.”

“Why the two of us?” Kakucho asks.

“I’ll get to that in a second. First, look here.” Takeomi points at another red circle located near the Yokohama port. “Someone has been stealing our firearms before they get exported. There have already been two reports on separate occasions.”

Koko speaks up. “Have we recovered any of the stolen goods?”

Takeomi shakes his head and replies, “There’s a high probability that the culprit is stealing from us so they can increase their sales. We did manage to find out that this person escaped via car both times, and the vehicles they used were originally from the Kabukicho area.”

Mochizuki scoffs. “We can’t even catch a person who runs away with a shitty car.”

“That’s why I’m putting two people on the case. Rindou will watch over Kabukicho, while Kakucho monitors the roads that go into the district.”

“There’s no guarantee that they’ll go back to Kabukicho, though,” Kakucho says.

“Rindou, your main job is to find the stolen firearms. Track down any of the buyers and see if they have any information on the culprit. If you find anything interesting, tell Kakucho immediately.”

“I don’t see why we should waste our time on this,” Mochizuki argues. “There’s plenty of folks who would throw themselves at this job to get promoted in Bonten.”

Ran interjects here. “If I remember correctly, Mochizuki, you and your men are in charge of Yokohama, right?” Sanzu rolls his eyes, already foretelling how the rest of the meeting will unfold. “If I’m right, then isn’t this mess a result of your men’s incompetence?”

Mochizuki growls. “My men are perfectly capable.”

“So does that mean you’re taking responsibility for this problem? Are you admitting that you and your men have been careless?”

Mochizuki knocks over his chair as he shoots up from his seat. He is only stopped by Mikey’s raised hand.

Mochizuki mutters, “I apologize, Mikey.”

Mikey utters a singular command. “We will follow through with Takeomi’s preliminary plan. If it turns out that the culprit is not in the red light district anymore, then Kakucho should expand his search to nearby neighborhoods.”

Everyone nods, and Takeomi adjourns the meeting.

They file out of the conference room, leaving only Sanzu and Kakucho who holds him back.

“Sanzu, I can look over her while I’m in the area.”

“What are you talking about?”

“It’s not a good use of your time to be driving around Tokyo. You need to stay in Shibuya.

“Your partner lives near Kabukicho, right? Tell her to stay safe.”

Sanzu’s anger bursts. He grabs Kakucho by the collar and snarls, “Don’t tell me what to do. Everything’s going great in Shibuya, and she’s safe with me.” Kakucho stares back, and Sanzu stalks out of the room.

Sanzu’s frustration is interrupted when he feels his phone vibrate in his back pocket. He pulls it out and sees a text from you. It’s a picture of you and Chizu. You’re both sitting on top of a white canvas spread across your living room floor, and there’s clay splattered all over your clothes. Some of it has even gotten into your hair. A short moment later, you follow up with another photo of Chizu’s artwork and an attached message: “Art project failed successfully? Guess I’ll need to buy some more clothes, haha!”

Snorting under his breath, Sanzu replies: “Let’s go shopping next weekend.”

A few seconds later: “Sure! I want to check out that large department store close by.”

Sanzu smiles. “Sounds good. See you in a few, loser.” He pockets his phone before heading towards the garage.

–

When you mentioned “a large department store close by,” he didn’t think it would be one in Kabukicho. The smuggler still hasn’t been caught, and while Sanzu’s pretty sure no one would start a fight on Bonten territory out in broad daylight, he knows he has to be careful.

“Where’s the brat? Is she not coming with us?”

You roll your eyes at Sanzu before chirping happily, “Chizu’s having another sleepover! Same girl as last time. I think they’re becoming really good friends.”

The two of you continue to make small talk throughout the rest of the day. You meander around the mall, dropping into shops to replace the clothes you sacrificed for your daughter’s clay pot. Sanzu would follow you around but waits for you outside the stores instead. He isn’t interested in anything in the first place, but more importantly, it’s the only way he could keep watch. No one has updated him on the smuggler’s location either, so he’s erring on the side of caution.

“Sanzu, is something wrong?”

Your voice breaks his concentration. He was glowering at his phone, waiting for a text or a call or anything, and he didn't notice you come out.

“Just work. Do you have everything you need?” Sanzu says as he takes the shopping bag from your hands.

“I need to go to one more store, but that’ll be it.” Your boyfriend nods and gestures to you to lead the way.

You take an escalator up to the third floor. Sanzu looks around, observing the groups of people filtering in and out of shops, the music playing from speakers scattered across the hall, and signs that read “Exit closed” and “Caution.”

He glances back at you. You’ve entered a home furnishing store and are checking out kitchenware, arms folded and eyes squinted as you judge stainless steel. You find one that you seem to be considering, and he scoffs out a laugh when he sees you knocking the pan bottom and listening with your ear close to the handle. He feels a rush of adoration when he sees you find a set you’re satisfied with, and suddenly he wishes he had recorded the moment.

When you return, he brushes strands of hair away from your face before taking the new bag and adding it to the small collection strung on his arm. You furrow your brows, reaching out to grab the bag and maybe a few more back, but Sanzu promptly turns away and begins striding toward another store. You huff in protest, but the smile tugging at the corners of your lips gives away your gratitude.

“Is there any place you want to go to?” you ask.

He still hasn’t received any communication from Kakucho or Rindou, and he’s not sure if the lack thereof is a sign that the situation hasn’t escalated or that the two are so busy because the case is becoming more dire than they had expected. Regardless, Sanzu has learned to hone and trust in his instincts, and something in him is telling him that it’s time to leave. He cannot be out in the public eye for too long, anyway.

“No, I think it’s time we head back,” he replies. You hum in agreement, and the two of you walk towards the exit of the department, not without continuing to bicker over who should carry your shopping bags and discussing ideas for dinner.

When you enter the parking garage, though, it’s eerie. Too still for a department store that’s packed with people. Too quiet when the lot is parked to the brim. Only your talking about the bakery and how business is doing echoes throughout the garage, and Sanzu tries his best to find your car as soon as possible.

When he spots your compact, he tugs at your hand that he’s holding onto.

You pause from the abrupt gesture, but Sanzu looks back at you with urgency: Keep talking. You swallow with difficulty but resume. In fact, you don’t stop speaking until Sanzu starts backing out of the parking spot.

You look at the side view mirror to your right, and at first, you see nothing out of the ordinary. No men in suits or guns out in the open or anything. But then a flash of red catches your eye. You follow the beam until you reach a small red dot shining on the cover of your glovebox.

Your eyes widen, and you’re about to scream. Until Sanzu slides a hand over your leg and pinches.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Through gritted teeth, Sanzu eases the car free and makes his way to the exit. The red dot disappears, but you’re not sure if it’s really gone.

Only after you leave the lot does Sanzu speak up again. “You’re going to need a new car.”

–

You feel your knees buckle at the sight of your home. The journey back took hours, with having to take several detours in case you were being followed, finding a replacement car for you, and reporting to Kakucho and Rindou.

Sanzu’s hands grip your underarms, supporting your entire weight and carrying you into your apartment.

You mutter apologies under your breath, and he grunts and huffs in response. He doesn’t let go until he heaves you onto your bed, and even with the support of your mattress, you feel like you’re about to keel over.

What… happened today?

Was I about to die?

I was going to die.

Sanzu just kneels in front of you. In the corner of your eye, you see his hand reach out and twitch, but it falls to his side in reluctance.

This silence would have persisted had it not been for Sanzu’s phone and its loud rings. He tugs it out of his pocket – a glance at the screen, and you see that it’s a call from Kakucho. Quietly, your lover pads out of your bedroom and into the kitchen to take a call.

“What is it?” Sanzu’s voice is rough, even slightly strained. You hear scratches and buzzes of noise, unable to discern what Kakucho is saying.

“For fuck’s sake, I already said we’re fine.” Pause. “I didn’t need your help. Hell, I think you should be more worried about Rindou because he can’t seem to fucking do his job.” More murmurs from Kakucho. Suddenly, a bang. “I have it under fucking control!”

Your body reacts, and you run to your door to see what the commotion is. Sanzu’s back faces you, and one of your dining chairs is on the floor. He’s cursing Kakucho out for both his meddling and incompetence, tugging at his hair and itching at the diamond scars at the corners of his mouth.

As you watch, the scene begins to fade away, as if the noise is being drowned out by water and the fluorescent brightness of the kitchen lights saturates your vision. Ironically, your body feels light and floaty, and you’re viewing everything from an omniscient point of view.

You’ve felt danger before. When your parents kicked you out, leaving you to fend for yourself. When your ex raised his hand at you – sometimes you can still remember the sting on your cheek. When you gave birth to Chizu – the anesthesia kicked in too late, and you really felt like dying then.

But… this?

Whenever you close your eyes, the image of that red dot plagues you. Unblinking, harsh, bloody. You’ll never forget it for the rest of your life.

And it wasn’t even pointed at Sanzu. Not that you would want your lover to be in danger, but it’s clear that your safety is now compromised. And if you become a target, they – whoever “they” is – would discover Chizu.

Oh, God, please not Chizu –

“Sorry for knocking down your chair.”

Sanzu’s voice brings you back to the present. Soul returning to your body, you try to remember how to look at him. It takes a while, but when you do, you struggle to discern the emotions in his eyes. Or rather, the lack of any such emotions. His blue eyes are darkened with nothingness, void of any warmth or life or happiness.

“There’s a lot we need to talk about,” he says. His tone is that of a businessman discussing logistics and contracts, devoid of any sympathy or concern, but the two of you are in your little, messy kitchen next to a faded wooden kitchen table and an excuse of a living room that is packed with Chizu’s crayons and drawing pad and the walls of an apartment that have only heard your cries at 3 AM because you’ve worked so goddamn hard to be happy and –

“Please not right now.” The words come out wobbly and weak, and a spark finally returns to Sanzu’s eyes. You’ve tried hard to wear indifference at all times, so you can’t imagine the expression you must have on your face.

Next thing you know, he’s carrying you back to your bed, closing your door with a push of his foot, and gently laying you down.

He whispers, “I’ll do anything to make it up to you. But right now, please just let me have you.”

You beg, “I need you.”

Sanzu kisses away at the pathetically large globs of tears that roll down your heated cheeks. He peels off your clothes before throwing them down onto the floor. He lets his hands wander and grab and knead at your skin, leaving bruising marks of pink and purple. He fills you up, and the room reverberates with his pants and your desperate pleas for more. And even when you finish, he keeps going, as if his desire could never be satiated, and you see flashes of white and red and nothing.

–

Sanzu can’t tear his eyes off of your sleeping form. Usually, he’d admire the damage he’d done to you and your body, but the dried crust and permanent frown on your face extinguish his pride.

He doesn’t know how to feel. He has a decisive character, yet even his strongest trait is failing him in this crucial moment. He doesn’t know how to proceed. There would be no right time to talk to you. There would never be a right time to see you so shell-shocked and crestfallen. There would never be a reason for Sanzu to hurt you.

He doesn’t have it under fucking control.

He manages to roll over onto his other side and is faced with your LED clock, the numbers indicating that it’s still early in the morning.

Time solves all eventually, right? But what would the solution look like in this case?

His gut drops. There is no other way to keep you and Chizu completely safe.

And suddenly, he’s feeling too much.

He cries and cries and cries. He’s sobbing while biting down on his chapped lips, which causes you to stir in your sleep, but you don’t wake. He hates showing weakness in front of others, but he bargains with himself to allow just this one time and brings you into his embrace.

In reality, though, once isn’t enough – he will never have enough of you. He wants all of your evenings, sunrises, homemade sugary desserts, breathless kisses, and gentle smiles. He wants to be there to accompany you on every grocery run and shopping trip because he knows you’re used to doing everything by yourself. After all, you’re busy with your new job, and he can spare an extra hour or two to help out – that’s what partnerships are, a give and take, back and forth. Besides, he’s promised Chizu he’d be there for her, so even if you didn’t want him anymore, he can’t go back on his word, right?

He sighs.

Who the fuck is he kidding?

Your relationship has never been a partnership. He’s always taking from you.

At first, you seemed so… immovable. So put together, he didn’t think you wanted another person in your life. But then you two naturally gravitated toward one another, and Chizu, being the loud mouth that she is, also held his heart hostage. He became a part of this little family, and for the first time, he wanted to be a more responsible person because you gave him reason to.

But it’s too late to change the worst parts of himself. Intentionally or not, he’s never been one to keep promises.

“Trust me,” he whispers into your temple, “I’d stay if I could. I really would.”

Sanzu knows he’s cursed to live a rotten life in the shadows. It’s probably some sort of karmic debt he’s accumulated from all the shit he’s done in his past lives, so as much as he loves you, he’s helpless to his fate. He can’t walk away from the ball and chain that is his past, and he’s too entrenched and entangled in the life he’s living now.

There is no other way.

He knows.

So he clasps your hands tightly one last time, praying to the heavens above for your and Chizu’s happiness and safety, before he prepares to leave.

–

The next morning, you notice that where Sanzu once was, sits a box with a note folded on top of it.

You already know.

Though you can’t help but still reach for the box, desperate for any trace of your lover.

Inside sits a thin wedding ring. There is no matching band.

I’ll always be yours.

You slip it on your fourth finger and admire it under the faint sunlight that streams into your room.

Maybe if you didn’t care so much.

Maybe if the two of you had met at another time or another place.

Maybe if you two were different people.

Maybe in another life.

[mochiswifey]

MOCHI SPOT THE DIFFERENCE

[yanderederee]