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hobisfavoritespritecan · 2 years ago

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PASSENGER

Lee X Reader

Lee has traveled everywhere with you ever since meeting you in the store the night after your father left you. He's never given you a reason not to trust he'll stay, but your anxiousness gets in the way after he admits to you that he wants to be closer than ever before.

⚠️ Warnings: Blood and gore, mentions of cannibalism, talks about sex, reader and Lee almost have sex, anxiety⚠️

The truck bounced up and down as the tires made harsh contact with the gravelly road beneath it. The bumps and swerves were almost soothing as they rocked both you and the pink haired boy next to you, who had taken comfort in the passenger seat staring out the window. His lips were drawn into a tight line and his eyes were closed but flitting back and forth as he dreamt of nightmares, presumably. It was hard to live the life the two of you shared and not feel a little scarred on the inside. Being on the road without any sense of direction was so freeing compared to the life you were living before. After discovering the news of your mother in the psych ward and your father leaving you to fend for yourself, the path towards self-love and acceptance has not been an easy one. Picking up people along the way and carrying their stories with you seemed to be the only attempt at salvation when it came to your humanity. That's what people with morals did. Did you have morals anymore? It was hard to tell.

"It's getting dark. Are we almost to the lake?" The boy piped in, interrupting your thoughts as your hands gripped the steering wheel a bit tighter as you prepared to turn right towards your special campsite. It was just a small spot by the trees and the lake that you two often shared a cigarette and a story or two. Sleeping under the stars has become normality.

"We're here." You said, turning over to glance at his expression of contentment yet sorrow. If there was anyone in the world who could manage to make both expressions visible at once, it was Lee.

The sky has darkened tremendously from when you first embarked on your little journey out towards the fields. The stars hung overhead in dim glowing orbs that contrasted against the rest of the universe above. The crescent moon illuminated the trees and the path to the usual parking spot under the bridge. It was beautiful at this time of night to say the least, and you felt your shoulders lose their tension as a serene wave washed over you.

The car's engine turned off and there was a silence between the two of you. Nothing uncomfortable, but a very distinct kind of silence where both parties are listening to the whims of nature. A cicada here and there and the rushing of water. It was all too perfect but unsettling at the same time. However, the only unsettling things were you and Lee; he only terrors that travelled in the dark were you and him. The kinds of beasts in fairy tales and children's nightmares. You consumed others and not just for their emotional intelligence. You consumed the very essence of their being. A trace of blood under the bottom of the boy's lips and scraped knees were prevalent as you took in the sights around you and remembered you were never normal to begin with. The smell of the last person you killed hung heavy in the backseat of the car and it was a stench that would not be rid of unless there was a strip cleaning of the entire vehicle. The man who kissed Lee in the same way you did at the carnival who was expecting a night of frivolity and excitement presumably due to having to hide his sexuality... was now nothing more than a couple of bloodied shirts and old pictures. Lee had monstrously slit his throat while you watched from outside in the night air similar to this one. The gleaming thick substance dripping from the man's neck and now took home in the mouth of your lover. And yet, for being this type of monster, Lee looked so lovely under the soft glow of the moon cascading down through the pick-up truck's slightly dirty windows.

All of a sudden, you broke the silence that had dawned on you two as fast as it now ended.

"What are you thinking of?" You asked, alluding to the familiar brightness behind his eyes.

"You. Me. Us." He said with clarity but uncertainty. There was more to this topic than he was letting on.

"Is something wrong between us?" You asked, wondering what it could've been that would make him think of your relationship. Was it a tension that he felt? Was it him explaining to you that the man from last night was not just due to a sense of sexuality, but had now awoken something in him that wasn't there before, and he could no longer continue being with you? Or had that sense of sexuality always been there, and you were just a way at him preventing the realization of who he knew he was? And now, in contrast to your last stream of thoughts, you decided maybe your humanity wasn't entirely diminished and that you might be more of a teenage girl than you thought.

"No, not at all," he said, reaching for a strand of your hair and pushing it behind your ear with a loving and slight obsessive look in his eyes. his hair was strewn about his face, and he allowed the loose curls to fall just above his eyebrows in pink spirals similar to fanciful ribbons. It was inviting and alluring, and you didn't want to look away from him. "I want to make love to you."

The confession hit you like a train, hard and fast as you finally realized what had been troubling your boyfriend. It wasn't unlike him to want something of the sort, considering he was a teenage boy, but it still left you slightly startled. After everything the two of you had been through, this didn't seem like something that wouldn't have ever happened. Your love with Lee was fast and exciting and wonderful but also horribly founded on the fact that you shared the desire to eat human flesh. Sometimes, you had a hard time distinguishing between what portion of your relationship was bloodlust and what was true emotional and physical connection. But then again, you felt no such connection with Sully, who had tried to coerce you into banding with him on his journey of collecting the locks of corpses.

Sounding less assured than you usually liked to, you let out an anxious mumble: "You- you want to make love? To me?"

He smiled and leaned in closer until you could feel his hot breath against your skin, alluring and charming once more.

"I want to be one together. In the ways that we can be with other people when we devour their flesh. There's something poetic about it, no? We wouldn't necessarily eat each other as we did with the guy from the carnival, but this is the closest lovers can truly get in the physical sense. And oh, (Y/N), have you consumed me in the emotional sense."

This conversation definitely took a turn you weren't expecting. Before any objections could escape you, his lips were flush against yours, pulling you into him or as close as the stick shift would allow. The dashboard was littered with papers that fell down to the floor and under the glove compartment, resting at Lee's soles. His arms, although gentle in composure, were firmly placed on the sides of you with one holding the back of your head and the other placed on your hip. He started to move his fingers up and down alongside your thigh in a polite but provocative manner. He wasn't forcing you into anything you were uncertain of, but he still wanted to show how terribly he needed you.

Breaking away to gasp for air, you look at his proud expression as he treated every moment spent with you as though it would be the last. His eyes said everything he didn't say in that moment. He worshipped you. And it wasn't in the honeymoon phase type of way, it was in an 'I see you as though you were crafted by the gods' way. His lips were slightly swollen from the kiss he'd just given you, and his sharp, shallow breaths showed you he was just as tense as you were. His pants were still covered in the mud from the cornfield where you ditched Carnival Man's body, and his shirt was torn and fraying towards the bottom. You had to have been in rough shape as well but you hadn't looked in a mirror anytime soon to confirm or deny whether that was a true statement.

Your collective breaths being the only sounds within the car and outside it made this moment so much more intimate. His face loomed inches away from your pursuing lips, as you had wanted more of his taste; your hands beckoned ever so slightly in a race to see which one would reach the beautiful boy's skin first, Lee's collarbone was the finish line. You had thought about making love to Lee before, of course. With only your thoughts to keep you company as of recent, it wasn't entirely a new concept for you to wake up after a long drive with Lee at the steering wheel; the heat between your legs unbeknownst to him. You had wondered at one point if he had ever thought of something similar, but you would never have had the courage to bring about a situation like this and bring your fantasies to fruition. But, Lee had been the one to make the first move and you were thankful.

Noticing your hesitance but desire, Lee took that as a sign to lean in closer until you were nose to nose.

"Would you make love to me?" He asked, waiting until he had your consent before he continued. The last thing he would ever want to do would be to make you uncomfortable, and for a moment he thought he had. Until you reached for the hem of his shirt which grazed his collarbone, he leant in fully and continued to kiss you with a more feverish passion.

Hot breaths and hands everywhere, everything was so awkward but fun. There would be a pause in between your kisses to allow for breathing room before Lee dove back in and offered you more of the sweet gesture. All the while, you realized the burning sensation in the core of both your chest and lower abdomen was increasing with every touch of your lips. It was as if there was something inside of you asking- no -begging to touch Lee further. A fiery feeling that you'd never fully experienced before pushed itself to the very undersides of your skin, clawing at being held within your body and not being let loose as this beast wanted. It was the same desire you felt when you watched the life drained from someone you would eventually feed on and your mouth would be already drooling with the promise of what was to come. It was a same immenseness as your cannibalistic tendencies, but at the same time what you had with Lee was entirely different. You wanted to consume his soul and his persona, not his physical components. And with this realization also came the understanding that cannibalism is a beautiful allegory to love.

Lee pulled away for a moment to give you a loving but questioning glance. His face was barely illuminated now considering the clouds that had taken control of the night sky. But still, you knew he looked so handsome as he took your hands and gently guided them to the hem of his jeans. It was again, nowhere near forceful, but entirely romantic and sweet as he was taking into account how this was just as awkward for you.

"Would you want to continue?" He asked, lightly holding onto your hands as they toyed with the fabric of his jeans.

"I want you, Lee." You finally gave him a more definitive answer than your previous attempts at vocalizing exactly what it was you wanted in this moment. It was his turn to blush, even though you wouldn't see due to the darkness of the surrounding area, but you had an inkling that his face was redder than before. Unbuttoning the top of his jeans and unzipping the fly, this became more of a reality to you. What is Lee would be done with you after this? What if he joined this whole escapade of finding your true family and what happened to you just so that he could receive sexual favors in return? You never thought of Lee in that way, but maybe because of the way he treated Carnival Man he hoped you would be next?

Halting his movements, he noticed you seemed distressed. "Is everything okay, my love?" He questioned. Lee didn't know what had happened to change the mood all of a sudden, but he assumed it had to be his fault as he was the one who had brought up the idea in the first place.

"I'm so so sorry if I pressured you into doing anything you didn't want to-"

"No, you didn't Lee." You said, trying to understand the way you were feeling. That burning feeling had left your body and was now instead an anxious and gut-wrenching pressure. Why did you have to overthink everything? You really wanted this with Lee so why would you let your thoughts get the best of you?

"Are we taking things too fast?" He asked, after a short moment of silence. He zipped up his jeans and leant beside you, hesitating at first, but then opting to put his hand on your shoulder just in case he had done something to make you uncomfortable. If you were shying away from his touch, he wouldn't want to make you feel that way again.

But to his relief, you didn't shy away. Instead, you rest your head on his shoulder and allowed for him to put his arm around you. Feeling comfortable, you wait for the anxiety to dispel a bit before vocalizing the troubling thoughts on your mind; Lee waiting patiently.

"Lee, I really want this with you. But I want to make sure that you want me."

Lee was very confused at this point. He was your boyfriend and had asked to make love to you because he wanted you, of course. He instantly felt a pang of guilt for making you feel as though you weren't wanted by him. In reality, he would follow you anywhere. His nightmare from earlier was about losing you. And not to another man or any of that type of thing, but just not being able to be in your presence again. The universe worked in strange ways and everything was uncertain, even the present.

"I want you very much," Lee said, moving in closer to you to give you a proper hug, "very much. And I apologize if I've made you feel any differently."

You sighed a breath of relief. Of course he automatically thought there was something wrong on his end.

"No, Lee. You've made me feel very wanted. I just want to make sure that it lasts. Everyone I've held dear to me has left in different ways, and I don't want to have to loose you too." You calmed him as you explained what was wrong. He tightened his grip on you, not in a way that was possessive, but in a more firm and loving way.

"(Y/N). Anyone would be a fool to leave you."

(A/N): I've been listening to a lot of Deftones lately and their music has been my go to for daydreaming about Bones and All. Anyhow, it's been forever since I've posted and I'll explain in another post for anyone who's interested! I hope this is alright as I try to ease myself back into writing as frequently as before. Love you guys! 💛🦐

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