#Tim and bart are UNHINGED CHAOTIC GENIUSES

[miss-choco-chips]

I saw this post https://dametsunax27.tumblr.com/post/616421151376359424/broke-tim-is-the-smart-one-bart-and-kon-are#notes from @dametsunax27 and couldn’t control myself. This makes no sense whatsoever. I’m sorry in advance.

One would think Tim Drake was the ultimate impulse control keeping his trainwreck of a team from going off the rails and burn.

One would be halfway wrong.

---.---

Cyborg is giving Kon lessons on how to beat ass at video games (and enjoying making it stick by thoroughly kicking his and goading about it like only a Titan could) when Dick’s little brother and now his teammate, Tim, Red Robin, stumbled out of the elevator. Dark glasses slightly askew let one catch a glimpse of his wide, pupil-blown blue eyes, and hair a utter mess; it was an understatement to say he was automatically worried.

Had he just been on a fight? But he didn’t seem beat up, or out of breath, so that couldn't be. He also didn’t look sick, but something was definitely off about him. Cyborg had never seen the teen look anything but perfectly poised, though a case could be make on how he always ever saw him during serious hero business. This could be usual Red Robin behaviour, for all he knew… still, this was Dick’s little brother, and if anything happened to him under Cyborg's watch, the unbidden rage of one Nightwing would fall on him and that wasn’t a pretty thing to receive, so he didn’t hesitate to pause the game and shoot Kon a worried look.

Said meta didn’t even seem phased, attention split between his frozen, half dead character on screen, and his apparently crazy friend.

-What’s up? -he asked, half turning to watch the small vigilante approach, when it was evident Cyborg wouldn't unpause the game until this was solved- Cracked a case? Finished a new game?

-Conner -Tim obviously tried to whisper, but ended up shouting halfway through the name; he also completely bypassed him, something the polite, all around good kid wouldn’t do unless in dire circumstances- Get ready. We are going out.

Cyborg tilted his head, looking around. There was no one else here, and Tim wasn’t suited up. This couldn't be a mission… right? 

Kon didn’t move from the couch, eyes squinted as if trying to decide something- Going where, bud?

-Nasa. We are rescuing the Aliens.

While that was a perfectly normal sentence to be said among superheroes who could and had traveled to literal space for missions, something didn’t quite make sense for Cyborg. Maybe it was the fact that Kon barely even blinked, instead looking like his suspicious had been confirmed.

-Uh huh. Which aliens?

-ET and its people, of course. We are gonna raid not only area 51, but all the other ones.

The meta just sighed, giving up and letting his controller back on the table in front of the couch.

-When was the last time you slept for more than thirty minutes at a time, buddy?

Tim threw both hands up- That doesn’t matter right now, Kon! The aliens need us! I’m calling Bart, you obviously can’t grasp the situation’s severity.

-No, wait, don’t/ -but it was too late, Tim already had his phone at hand, and he evaded all of Kon’s attempts at taking it away with a grace very specific of his family, but very surprising considering he was one step down from feral.

Bart was with them half a second later.

-DudethisissocrashIlovehowyouthinklet’sgosavesomealiens!

-No!

Once again, Conner was ignored. He slumped back into the couch, looking at the ceiling like a man deep into despair.

-Can you hack them? -a new blink and Bart seemed ready to go, butterfly net at hand and Indiana Jones hat above his massive mane of hair. His other hand had a very suspicious plastic bottle, that Cyborg quickly recognized as a very, very  sweet and caffeine imbued drink- We can probably use some blueprints to know where to go to find the aliens fast and free them.

-Already ahead of you. I haven’t seen any containment units, but there’s some open spaces that could be hiding underground prisons. We are going to check that out first.

At this point, Conner just seemed tired. He got up from the couch again and slowly but steadily approached the plotting geniuses as the talked about possible traps and battle strategies. Cyborg knew, on a superficial level, that Bart was, like, very smart and Tim was a veritable genius; but he hadn’t been quiet aware they were chaotic. Apparently, sugar rush and sleep deprivation pushed them both to… this.

Should he call Dick? There was still some responsibility to be taken from not making Tim sleep -or noticing how unhinged he was getting- before, but surely his old friend wouldn't blame him for something that, according to Kon’s face, was a normal occurrence.

-...And then, we look into the Director’s personal life, find his family, and take his wife hostage! Or husband, whatever, we ain’t letting heteronormative thinking stop us!

-Are you using that word right?

-I think so, yes. 

-Good, you get extra points for that one. 

-Sweet.

-Should we also kidnap their kids, if they have them? I won’t feel comfortable about taking our answers from them, but their parents don’t know how far are we willing to go, so we can just bluff our way around it.

-Oh, oh! You can do the Batman voice! It’ll scare them so much, they’ll shit their pants without us even getting physical! And we won’t even need to take their children!

-No, we do need to. You know how I feel about backup plans.

-But you just said you don’t like the idea.

-I don’t remember which word I started this sentence with, Bart, don’t come at me with something I might or might not have said a few seconds ago.

The tired meta, who had been slowly and quietly approaching them, was finally close enough to snatch both their smaller bodies around the waist, tucking them under his arms and carrying them like that.

-I’m pretty sure half of what you two plotted somehow violates the Geneva convention. Crime is bad, remember Rob? 

Tim looked up at him, wide eyes over the rim of his dark glasses, blinking like butter wouldn't melt on his mouth. He was completely pliant, letting Kon float them all towards the elevator. Bart, on his part, trashed like a half feral cat, hissing and spitting. 

Cyborg distantly thought they’d be needing to disinfect the floor. Again.

-No! Kon, my man, you  can’t stop us! We are freeing your people!

-ET isn’t my people. Or real. 

-BLASPHEMY! Tim! Buddy, back me up. We said we were gonna free the aliens!

Tim tilted his head, glasses almost falling off, and stretched his neck enough he could see Bart at the other side of Kon’s broad chest.

-...who are you again?

-TIM, NO, COME BACK, I NEED UNHINGED TIM TO HELP ME FREE THE ALIEN FROM OUR TYRANNICAL GOVERNMENT. KON, BUDDY, WE MIGHT BE VIOLATING SOME LAWS, BUT YOUR-

-Not mine.

-YOUR PEOPLE ARE BEING UNLAWFULLY OPPRESSED AND DETAINED, AND WE NEED TO…

Cyborg couldn't hear whatever followed, as the elevator’s door closed. The living room was once again in silence.

Cyborg was having an out of body experience.

What the fuck?

[animemangasoul]

...........

I've been having a shitty couple of days and today I decided (very late) hmmmm why not check tumblr and see what my fav writer has written and look at that! She sent me a text with this amazing link and i thought "well I'm 100% this is either gonna cheer me up or break my heart"

........

Never have I lover a fic as much as this one! Lmao oh my God. Poor Kon. My man is so used to the crazy that he's just tired and burnt out and lol Kon sweetie they are your people because Bart said so. And what Bart says is the truth, don't you know? And dkdndodndkdkdj my life is complete. Tim and Bart are truly the chaotic duo and Kon did not sign up for this. Oh my God. They wanted to kidnap people like lmao if Damian had heard Tim like this he might have been legitimately scared of him.

Thank you again for being awesome hun. Whatever you write always seems to be whatever I nèeded to read!!!!!!

I saw this post https://dametsunax27.tumblr.com/post/616421151376359424/broke-tim-is-the-smart-one-bart-and-kon-are#notes from @dametsunax27 and couldn’t control myself. This makes no sense whatsoever. I’m sorry in advance.

One would think Tim Drake was the ultimate impulse control keeping his trainwreck of a team from going off the rails and burn.

One would be halfway wrong.

—.—

Cyborg is giving Kon lessons on how to beat ass at video games (and enjoying making it stick by thoroughly kicking his and goading about it like only a Titan could) when Dick’s little brother and now his teammate, Tim, Red Robin, stumbled out of the elevator. Dark glasses slightly askew let one catch a glimpse of his wide, pupil-blown blue eyes, and hair a utter mess; it was an understatement to say he was automatically worried.

Keep reading