#This whole thing happens in the span of 20/30 years I think???

[sosadraws]

SOSA I just saw the tags on that post u reblogged, may I ask abt the slow dragon transformation OC 👀?

Hi Lynx!!! Sorry for the delay, it's just that I was procrastinating because I knew the answer would be LONG and I needed to draw stuff... sorry 😅

Beforehand, let me say, I deeply apologize for the testament below.

A little bit of lore context that makes this whole thing extra shitty: In universe (modern fantasy) dragons got the shark treatment where due to bad despictions in media and literature, they're perceived as creatures of evil, destruction and death (so, the sharks of this universe).

Backstory context: This elf dude Victor in his teeneager years used to participate in magical underground fighting rings, where participants fought shapeshifting (partially or totally) as the animal of their liking (warning: old art)

Things happened, and he decided to turn his life around and leave this part of him permanently buried in the past,

Much later on his character arc (yeah technically all of this is spoiler material if I were actively writing this story), his ex from back them (that is currently a corpse being possesed by a lovecraftian being) reveals all of this information to his current wife and son AND curses him to permanently become a dragon, in a "Your past will forever haunt you" kind of way. For reference, this is what he originally looked like (again, old art):

Ok so about the whole "dragon transformation thing", so thought process was that it must be really taxing for an humanoid creature to suddenly gain animal traits. The extra weight of horns would take a toll on the neck and lots of big, sharp teeth wouldn't fit on the mouth and would make eating and talking difficult. How do you control your fire breathing? how do you stop your new tail from accidentally hitting people and knocking over furniture? How do you take care of scaly skin?? and so on.

Eventually things start to balance each other (longer mouth to fit teeth) but I guess it would still be like growing pains but like, on the whole body due to the constant shitfting of of muscles, tendons and such.

He learns to manage things better thanks to medication, support from friends and family as well as getting informed about dragons (turns out, they actually aren't bloodthirsty killing machines, but very smart and playful creatures that love shiny things).

As soon as his body isn't suitable for living alogside other humans, he dispatchs himself to a national park (sanctuary? I don't remember) to live fully as a dragon, and he just kinda chills there as he slowly loses his human memories and evenually dies.

(That's not his final design, please imagine a cool dragon with teal and black/grey scales)

So yeah, now you know~ ✨

[samijey]

okay i’m so glad you didn’t think that sami would turn heel last monday (or anytime soon) because i trust your judgement on this and i cannot stand the thought of that man going to the dark side. he’s too pure.

I appreciate you! However, I think Sami getting back in touch with his heelish tendencies is a very exciting prospect and one that fans of the character and his dynamic with Jey (platonic or not) should look forward to - I'll tell you why under the break because I started typing and all of a sudden I was several paragraphs in oof ✋😩

Firstly, it's counterproductive to think of any wrestling character as "too good"" or "too evil" - anyone worth scrutinizing has shades of grey and is therefore susceptible to positive AND negative influences - be those coming from within themselves or from outside sources. Pro-Wrestling is a medium where storytelling is largely told via conflict, whether that comes from betrayal, friendly competition, manipulation, etc feuding is how relationships deepen and how characters grow and evolve.

Sami and Jey are already way outside the norm in the sense that they've kept contact on screen for years since their feud ended just to keep reminding us how close they are and to reap the benefits of a great storyline by simply giving them 20-30 seconds of screen time on a regular basis to just be cute and pop the crowd - this simply does not happen in WWE. Name me 2 other characters who constantly interact backstage across the span of years without being in a feud/faction/tag team - it just not a thing they like to waste time on (which sucks and robs us of depth but that's a whole other rant). Now, for and for as nice as it is to see them support each other and maintain the friendly status quo for so long, this is still wrestling and if we want their relationship to gain new layers, worthwhile conflict is something we SHOULD want, as long as it is well written and well timed (I know the performance aspect will be stellar, so that part doesn't worry me).

They got to the point they did - a fan favorite duo with a tremendously underrated amount of iconic moments and dialogues exchanged - BY WORKING THROUGH CONFLICT. The fact that Jey was the heel for most of their feud and was pushed into reconnecting with his better self by a babyface Sami "who saw the good in him the whole time and never gave up on him" should honestly have everyone salivating at the prospect of them feuding again with the roles reversed. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want to see Jey be the one to help pull Sami back into the light when he comes dangerously close to losing himself??? To give Jey the opportunity to cut amazingly emotional promos like this again?? That's what shipping gold is made of, come on!! Think of the parallels! The call-backs! The devastatingly sad looks of longing making a comeback but now with 3 years of baggage to give it 10x more depth!! THE EVENTUAL REUNION ONCE THEY'VE MADE PEACE ONCE AGAIN AND ARE BACK TOGETHER AND THEIR BOND IS STRONGER THAN EVER FROM HAVING SURVIVED A WHOLE NEW SET OF TRIALS AND HARDSHIPS??? I understand some people don't want to see their faves have conflict, but that is inevitable in wrestling and it's how iconic dynamics are cemented.

Let's also not forget Sami was a full heel for a LONG time, so there's a whole catalogue of past tendencies and behaviors to pull from. Back then, manipulation and a disheartening win/loss record were the trigger for him turning heel, not any dark impulses of his own (strong reason why I'll always argue he's a natural babyface), so should he get back in touch with his heelish side, I'm adamant that the most in-character way to do it is to again have others dripping venom in his ear and a sustained string of losses - both of which are already at play (shout-out to Karrion, Seth and Drew especially, dem nasty haters). Hell, the fact that the ball has been rolling for a while on these two points and Sami has firmly remained good speaks volumes to how much stronger of a character he is now, which is wonderful - and again - the reason why we need to put these characters through situations™ and have them struggle to overcome them.

At the end of the day, I have very VERY little trust in WWE to handle anything correctly EVER, but I do trust the performers to take what they're given and elevate it to the best it can be. I know there's still a whole goldmine of storytelling between Jey and Sami to explore, which says a lot considering they've been in each other's close orbit for 3 years now and there's still so much more we can do - in a perfect world we get a great, emotionally rich feud between them, a satisfying pay-off with them reuniting once more and FINALLY that tag run they kept teasing last Summer and Jey has been yapping about in interviews for aaaages - give that man his lil treat!

[warsamongthestars]

BAD BATCH (CHARACTERS) + ECHO HEADCANONS-- WITH STORIED BITS!

Because I was inspired by tags, why not a round of BB HCs?

Not TBB, just BBs. The characters, and I'm coming out the Clone Wars primarily, with only bits taken from TBB. ( Like a good fanfic, Let's steal back the small good things )

I know, I analyze--so let's see how far I can stretch it, yeah?

Today we are HCing...

99 AND THE 99 PROJECT

THE BAD BATCH'S MUTATIONS (Thus their abilities)

DOMINO SQUAD

( I would label it as Mature (Because I have a general idea of labelling), but Tumblr decided to be fucking hilarious about it--so I'm going ask you to be Mature. There's nothing explicit here, its about as snarky as a Discworld novel. So Guess that means its Teens and Up, PG-13, or whatever. )

99 INSPIRED THE 99's PROJECT

"Old man 99!? THE JANITOR FROM KAMINO!?"

Whether 99 was an alphagen or a first-gen, the idea here is based on small TCWs comments. Stuff about "Growth" tubes.

Its probably in the capitalist-eugenics aliens' (kaminonians) interest to skip the uncomfortable bits in natural human growth. After all the uncomfortable bits of human growth aren't Profitable.

So, have an age to load a clone into a growth tube, and just, rapidly grow them until they're the stage you want (to be profitable). This means skipping teenage years. It means skipping the small childhood years.

So, given that 99 is mature and capable, he was likely loaded into a growth tube about where his "teen years" would start... and it went horribly wrong. Aging him by decades instead of a few years.

And the 99 project, would be Nala Se's little project, to find out why it went so wrong--and then to fix it for future clones. Because after all, you can't have an army of old men.

And judging by the fact that 99 is the only Old Man Clone we've seen in TCWs, I imagine the project worked as intended--and like any greedy eugenic science-capitalist, Nala Se decided:

"Y'know, I could do something more with this. I could find the most common 'bugs' in our clone genome, and I could stretch them, and modify them, and make benefits out of these flaws."

And the 99s were created

ADDENDUM - on Growth Tubes

Growth Tubes would only be successful if the human brain was stimulated rapidly as the body grew, or you risk compromising the human brain. Its a very delicate organ and rapid growth would be very bad. So flash-training, basically rapidly dumping organized information and sensory input, would occur over the course of the rapid-growth. This is to ensure you have a nice healthy human brain afterwards. There are clones who did end up with a "leaky growth tube" (rumors about Hardcase), where the only issue hat ended up happening is a deficit in attention spans and impulsiveness.

What's significant about First-Gen clones, is that they mostly went the old fashioned way of growing--as in slow (but accelerated) growing. After First-Gen, Kaminonians decided: "No, this is not fast enough... and its too stressful, Teenage clones complaining about growing pains and having attitudes--its just too much. What do they think this is, a Human Domicile?"

Fast-Tracked clones are those who ended up in a growth tube the majority of their time, and even then, skipped steps once they were out. Domino Squad, being fast-tracked, maintained the "attitude" flaws characteristic of those who didn't spend a whole lotta time working with brothers out of the tube.

This is also why all "standard" clones look older than their early twenties. Many were grown out, biologically hitting the fast-forward on growing years to be fully grown. Chronologically, they are official "10". They only have 10 years of life, by the start of the war. Accelerated Aging measurement? 20. Because they are made to age twice as fast a normal humans. Biologically? Mid-20 to early 30s. It helps the resemblance to their prime, and avoids any possibilities of "late growth spurts". Luckily, clones are made to stay in their prime far longer than a normal human.

2. THE MUTATIONS OF THE BAD BATCH "They're non-standard but with abilities not seen in even normal humans."

The problem with finding a 'flaw' in a genome is that you have to ask...

a). Who is saying there is a Flaw? Are they someone you want saying that there is a flaw?

b). Why is it a flaw? ... But is it really?

c). what are they going to do to "remedy" the "flaw"? Is it an actual remedy, or are they just saying it is.

And being capitalist-eugenic scientists, who study the science of profiting from genes and geneing from profits, certain "flaws" are going to be the non-profitable kind.

They probably think its a terrible terrible sin, that the human genome is not naturally made to make capital.

But through this list of Flaws, Nala Se decided--"we can gene splice can't we? Yes, why shouldn't I gene splice. I can make much better clones through splicing."

After all, if you're going to make money from genes, in order to do more geneing, adding more Genes should surely add more Money.

FOR WRECKER...

(Shift from "canon"--for thematic reasons, this Wrecker is 9901)

Kaminonians are baffled by how strong and yet delicate humans are. They can lift 300 pounds, and yet can still get crushed to death by 300 pounds.

Its ridiculous, really.

So Nala Se took notes and samples from the beauty and gracefulness that is the Rancor.

And for her designated 9901, gave him near instantaneously recovering muscle, that could lift 3x the normal 300 pounds of health humans, and indestructible bones.

Why if an explosion were to hit 9901's face head on fro the left side--it would not, in fact, pulverize his skull or any the soft tissues the skull protects. The eye would absolutely be kriffed though.

Sure, the increased metabolism might be a bit too grand for the rations...

But the Kaminonians were assured--they are specially crafted rations, and the clone will just have to adapt. Humans can just, not be hungry after all, why it takes a month for an average human to starve! If the clone complains, well he is getting fed so he wont' starve. It's a bargain, after all. He's lucky the Kaminonians are even bothering.

FOR HUNTER...

( Shift from "canon"--for thematic reasons, Hunter is now 9903 )

The various pores of the human face always seemed to... leak to the Kaminoinans. Why do humans have to do so much leaking? Ought to make all those "face pores" that do their "poring", do actual useful work for once.

So for 9903, he got an ampullae. Plenty of the predators on the planet of Kamino had ampullae, and they seem to get along just fine.

Because of the odd small organ network that encompassed his face and down his neck, connecting various natural human senses such as scent, taste, sight, and hearing, 9903 proved to be passively sensitive towards electromagnetic fields. He would always know where North is on a planet. He would always know where he was at, and what was around him.

Why, the Kaminonians though, that would be PERFECT for droids! Droids have electric-magnetic fields!

... The unfortunate fact, that the Kamionians neglected to add, is that Everything produced an electromagnetic field, and super imposing upon natural humans senses of "being sensitive to particles" and "being naturally sensitive to atomic wavelengths"...

is that it would be a sensory nightmare. A cacophony of hell from the very world around him, to consume him utterly.

Well... The clone will just have to adapt, as the Kaminonains say. By the very coral reefs of Kamino, the clones are just not grateful for the work we do over their petty little lives.

FOR CROSSHAIR...

( For thematic purposes--we're keeping 9904 )

Humans have such tiny eyes, the Kaminonians think, how do they see so much if they're so tiny? and sensitive. By the whale song of the sea, Human eyes are just Too Sensitive.

So for 9904, they gave him super sight. But not just super sight, but super duper protected sight. They decided that the vestigial "third eyelid" had no business being vestigial anymore, the lazy little thing, and regave it life in 9904's eyes.

Why it could protect from Water, and Dust, and Bright Lights.

And they, the Kaminonians, were really reeving up now. Why just stop there? Give him reflectors. Let him see in the dark!

Why didn't we think to do this for all the clones?

Because sudden lights and sudden darkness, would mess up his eyes immediately. Because long term lights would cause a sensory overload. And long term darkness would cause (temporary) color blindness.

And no amount of protection stops a blaster to the face.

Well, thinks the Kaminonains, Its not as bad as the last ones.

FOR TECH...

( For thematic purposes... he is 9906. Yes, I like "Baby Tech", shush you. )

We know exactly what to do with this one, thinks the Kaminonians. Humans are just so... Dull. We load their brains nice and healthy, and they're still so dull.

We want at least one to have an intelligent conversation with.

I KNOW, LET'S MODEL THIS ONE AFTER US--THE KAMINONIANS! And we're geniuses you know, why shouldn't at least... one clone, be a genius like us.

For 9906, they attempted the daunting task of Modifying the Brain. Increasing memory retention and synapses flexibility. Awareness and understanding--a living computational organ.

And 9906 was Perfect.

... Save that he did not like Kaminonians, because healthy human brains, by any standard, tend to develop things like "Understanding" and "Feelings for and about other People", and tend to greatly dislike those who want to treat other people monstrously.

Why, 9906 even argued against the treatment of Clones. Clones are capable of thought and creation, they are a people and thus their own culture.

And the Kaminonians mourned. Clearly, all the work they put into this brain was for Nothing!

It only wants to learn about the galaxy and discover the beauties and wonders behind technology and space and peoples--why, it doesn't think of Profit or Genes at all!

It even argued that it wasn't a Product to be Sold, but a person to be talked to. The Kaminonians found this scoffful.

It would learn, the Kaminonians decided, oh it would learn.

ADDENDUM

What about 9902 and 9905? Well... Heheheh.

DOMINO SQUAD "A real domino effect, this one."

There are birth batches, and there are batch-squads. Birth-batches separate to all become batch-squads... but not all batch-squads are from the same birth-batch.

Such is the case of the fast-tracked "Domino Squad". Because they were fast-tracked, these clones spent an unpresidented time in the growth-tube. And worse, each one had a falling out with their original batch-squad.

The one that would be known as "Hevy" was overly confrontational, and prone to starting fights. He failed out of his original batch-squad for his attitude and physical violence.

He mellowed out, once he found that his aggression lead to serious consequence, but it didn't completely stop the fights or the lone wolfing. (Until after graduation).

The one that would be known as "Cutup" never took anything seriously, and his old trainers (and old squad) had enough. The trooper didn't even take regulations seriously, and was caught with contraband (Cutup couldn't believe that simple playing cards were "contraband", haven't they ever heard of a game before?)

The one that would be known as "Droidbait", tended to give up too easily, in a total reverse to "Hevy's" situation. Surrender is not acceptable, and he'll have to relearn the hard way.

The one that would be known as "Fives", ironically, did not have a poor record following him for anything he did. Half of his birth-batch-squad were found deceased after a training exercise. The survivors were sent elsewhere. For this, Fives was a quiet, serious but very anxious cadet and rookie until he hit arc-trooper. He kept even his name close. Just in case. Fives got to watch one of the survivors graduate with Bravo Squad. He never found out what happened to him after that.. but he doesn't assume its good.

Always have to adapt on the fly, because if you don't, the situation might just kill you. No matter how "Safe" everyone says it is. In fact, especially if its "Safe".

The one that would be known as "Echo" was the most devious.

By all accounts, Echo was a stand up trooper--he read the regulations and followed them to the letter. He took pleasure in buffing his armor and uniform. He could recite exact rules, was perfect in inspections. He knew exactly where everything is and how to act as expected. A true "By the Book" trooper. Why, what could ever be wrong with Echo?

Because if you look like you belong, and if you know the rules, you can do Anything. And Echo, he knew that people knew that the Way Things Act were often considered more important than What Things Actually Are, but you still have to Play Expectations if you want to get what you want.

And Echo, he tended to learn how play expectations. The fact is, while it was considered an accident and misunderstanding--Echo put himself in a position to get transferred away from his old birth-squad.

( He had nothing against his old birth-batch. They were fine lads. But Echo refused to be canon-fodder. If he was going to go out into the galaxy and make a difference, he was going to do it his way--if he was going to get blown up, it was because he damn well decided he was going to get blown up, not because a general told him to. )

Yes it would mean being held back. But such is the price of prep work (He certainly didn't feel like he was ready--and he wanted to test the waters a bit longer), and well, there had to be brothers on Kamino, who actually think about what they're being told--not just blinding follow without consideration.

And you can only work the rules to your liking, if you know what the rules are. Good thing Echo likes to read.

ADDENDUM

Reason Birth-batch and Batch-Squad are separate, is because the general idea is that they birth clones enmass, but since we only ever see cadets in squads, they aren't necessarily trained enmass.

There had to be a reason why Echo had the Balls to jump Rank and talk to a General, as a cadet, as request transfer.

None of the numbers of Domino Squad match up to indicate that they're apart of the "Birth-Batch". So this sugested to me that they might be from different batches--and thusly, are probably a "throw them together" squad.

[littlesparklight]

The timeline I've constructed for my Greek myth fic 'verse has been a gradual process (and labour. so, so much labour sobs), and I wish I'd realized earlier I could use Herakles' age of death to help guide how many years I'd at the least need to put in between his birth and when Perseus kills Medusa. As it was I've had to move things earlier than Herakles' birth back by several decades at least once!

You'd think Herakles' Labours would be useful as a guideline, which they are. Sort of. Because the thing is, as fantastically ordered and neatly laid-out as the Labours and the other events afterwards are (sort of) laid out in the Bibliotheke (which is so helpful in general), I quickly had to just discard not just the order of the Labours but the idea that they happen in twelve years consecutively.

Mostly (but not only) because of the last one, with Kerberos. It needs to coincide with Theseus and Pirithous' attempt at kidnapping Persephone, which happens right after Pirithous has helped Theseus kidnap Helen - and Helen is conventionally between 9-12 years old when this happens. (Later I also realized that Odysseus needed to be somewhere between 16-20 years old when he got the bow from Iphthius right before Herakles murders him, which, fortunately, by happenstance my timeline as it was at that point could accommodate without changing any ages or moving any events!)

What's actually been really helpful as a guideline is the journey of the Argo (but even that isn't without problems (': ) and the events around it.

Given who all are most often considered a participant in the journey, it was obvious I needed to put the Calydonian boar hunt after it - specifically Akastos always being alive and on the journey, and still only a prince, therefore Peleus accidentally killing his father in law (during the hunt) and coming to Iolkos to be purified by Akastos and the mess that happens because of this cannot have happened yet.

So you have a neat connection of events, presumably in very short order after each other; the journey, the funeral games of Pelias, the hunt, Peleus going to Iolkos (and losing his wife); Peleus and Thetis' wedding. I put these within a collective two year span, of which the journey takes up most of one year.

I completely ignored that the goddesses always seem to go to Paris immediately after the wedding. It makes just as much sense, and worked better for character and timeline and age reasons, that Zeus would drag the whole thing out. Plus with the Dioskouroi as part of the journey they'd been to be teens at least.

I early on settled on a rather simple way to chop things up; the journey of the Argo is ~15 years before the start of the war (because of Achilles' age at the first muster), and Herakles' attack on Troy ended up being 39 years before the war. I think I originally had it be 30 years before but pushed it up.

I reaaallyy quickly decided I'd go with what other myths as well as the vase painting suggests when it comes to the Dioskouroi; that they're older than Helen (and Klytaimnestra). It makes more sense, so they've ended up being nine years older than Helen.

I had to fight a lot with both the myths and my timeline to try to figure out where to put Tyndareos' exile/Hippokoon usurping him.

You could probably put it much earlier than I did (especially if you're ignoring that Herakles' attacking Sparta is part of his post-Labours wars/events), since all that you need is that the Labour to fetch Geryones cattle has happened. One of the reasons given for the attack on Sparta is that Sparta/Hippokoon helped Pylos when Herakles attacked it to avenge himself of Neleus and his sons attempting to steal the cattle.

If you put it earlier, then all the kids are presumably born in Sparta (though I do know I've read a source that imply the Doskouroi were actually born during the exile...). I put Hippokoon's usurpation rather late, in conjunction with Helen and Klytaimnestra's births, so they're actually born in Pleuron (where I put exiled Tyndareos and his family). The whole family comes back to Sparta/Lakedaimon in my timeline only shortly before Helen is kidnapped by Theseus, when she's ten.

And Agamemnon and Menelaus come to Sparta for a year a couple years later, first spending time in Sikyon and then Calydon (to match up with that Aegisthos kills Atreus when he's "grown to manhood". But I've actually cheated a little and he's like... fourteen or something, but I couldn't have this happen later.

so basically: 1231 BC - The judgement, Paris goes to Sparta. He's twenty, Helen twenty four, Menelaos thirty. (In 1235 BC, the Epigoni attack Thebes, ten years after the Seven did so.) Seven years before the judgement, in 1238 BC, Helen and Menelaos marry; she's seventeen. Menelaos and Agamemnon are exiled from Mycenae between 1244-1240 BC; they spend the first couple years in Sikyon and Kalydon, until Tyndareos, sympathetic to their plight (and probably having had their character vouched for by Oeneus, since, uh, Helen's abduction by Theseus was just the year before they were exiled), offers to help them. They spend a year (between 1241-1240) in Sparta; at the end Tyndareos lends military aid to retake Mycenae and Agamemnon marries Klytaimnestra. In 1245 BC, the Seven attack Thebes early in the year and, too several campaigns of Herakles means Tyndareos can take control of Lakedaimon again. Later in the year, Helen (10) is kidnapped by Theseus and Pirithous, they then attempt to kidnap Persephone and are imprisoned. Peleus and Thetis marry the year before that, in 1246 BC, right at the start of the year; I liked the idea that he attempted for a couple months to woo her before the wrestling happens (and it also means a little time to perhaps grieve his wife committing suicide), so the mess with Akastos, the Calydonian boar hunt, and the funeral games of Pelias all happen in 1247 BC. Thus, the journey of the Argonauts are during 1248 BC, with the Dioskouroi 16 years old. At this point they're obviously still living in Pleuron, and have been for several years, as Hippokoon usurped him in 1255 BC, when they were 9.

I partially chose Pleuron because well, it'd make rather sense for Tyndareos to take refuge with his father in law, and because there is actually quite a lot of connection between Ikarios and a section of Akarnania (west of Aetolia, where Pleuron is). Which I decided to lean into, so that when Tyndareos goes back to Lakedaimon, Ikarios and his family stays, having been given land of their own in Akarnania.

[itsnotablogsblog]

BENNY BLANCO AND SELENA GOMEZ -Rumors on how Selena does not love Benny-

So for a whole week, I have been getting bashed with videos and rumors on how Selena doesn’t really in fact love Benny. But the question is if these rumors are true.

Hi. Hello and welcome back to another great week of tumblr content. Although this might not seem like a Bad Omens drama or tea thing recently.

Let’s head on into this conversation

Let’s start from the beginning.

Benny Blanco might not be so attractive to other people, but his talent and charisma in what he puts out in his music for others to sing, hit millions of streams from different artists. Including Rihanna, Ed Sheeran, Justin Bieber, Maroon 5, and Katy Perry.

Although he had history being friends with Justin long before he met Selena Gomez, their relationship ended as soon as he started dating Selena. But what exactly made Selena fall in love with Benny?

In the Mid- year of 2023 they seemed to take their relationship private for months after she met Benny on a song he produced for her called “Same Old Love”

This also included another song on February 28, 2019 with J Balvin and Selena Gomez titled “I Can’t Get Enough.”

His proudest songs he ever recorded in the studio includes “Diamonds” and working with Ed Sheeran.

In depth he goes in and explains his accomplishments with Rhianna. Before Uber was a thing, Benny goes and explains that Rhianna only had 20 to 30 minutes to record a song with Sia.

Within the span of 15 minutes they had a beat and song titles already made. Now that’s an achievement.

But what made Benny want to date Selena? Honestly I think their contributions into recording her music started it all. Although Selena had to get a kidney transplant from her friend at the time, and dealing with Lupus, overall I think Selena just wanted someone there for her.

Things didn’t go official until June 8, 2023 when Selena came out with her new song called “Single”

Written and produced by Benny Blanco and Cashmere Cat. Gomez would later on reveal on her social media in December of that same year she’d been dating Benny for six months. This would mean they were dating before she released her song.

She also made sure he would be on the guest list for her inaugural event which was a campaign for her Rare Beauty Makeup.

December 7, 2023. She made an instagram post confirming her relationship with Blanco. The following year would later on be revealed.

It may seem like Benny and Selena’s relationship skyrocketed news coverage for months. In the span of 2024, fans have seen and watched their relationship grow and develop as to what it is today.

So where exactly do these rumors come from?

On an Episode of “Hot Ones” by First We Feast. Benny and Selena are the honored guests. But not later on in the video the host asks Selena what is one song that Benny produced. She would later on reply “I’m such a little baby. I’m going to stop being this way.” As to dodging the question.

People have come to sense that she really doesn’t care about Benny, knowing that Benny looked at her in disappointment. His smile faded away re-establishing the response to “she’s being dramatic” not knowing how to reply to what she just said.

Fans Come to Speculate that the engagement might not work out long term.

Countless of videos surrounded the media on Tik Tok, of people bashing their relationship with “Benny I hope you see this.” To “Selena doesn’t love you.”

Knowing from the single they released together titled “Ojos Tristes”

This blew up the internet like crazy. Stating that Selena hasn’t fully healed by her and Biebers relationship and that she was just using Benny as a coping mechanism or rebound.

Theory # 2

The Marriage Might Not Happen

Benny and Selena might not make it through the cut in their future together. Of course this means bringing Benny in her drama from decades ago, she seems pretty unsure on if she actually wants to marry Benny.

With countless of interviews to Jimmy Fallon. Selena always seems to dodge the question to the host. Which is “when is the wedding?”

Selena seems to be pretty anxious into answering that type of specific question and answers with a different approach to the answer that isn’t exactly what they were looking for.

Benny on the other hand, has been seen heart broken by how she’s handled the situation. Leaving him even more disappointed and upset that Selena doesn’t want to answer the question.

Theory # 3

She’s Regretting her decision

This may seem far fetched but from what I’ve been seeing lately i made a theory on maybe she regrets her decision being with Benny.

Yes she loves him, but she seems to not love him the way he loves Selena. She may see him as a great person, but maybe the feelings aren’t really attached.

I’ve been in one before and let me tell you, it does not always end well. You are left feeling guilty that you haven’t done enough, or even second guess where the commitment or communication went wrong. Having feelings for someone isn’t the same as not having feelings for another. You end up giving your heart and feelings while the other is bread-crumbing the relationship.

Bread-crumbing relationships aren’t the best.

Now what’s in it for Benny?

It seems like Benny genuinely cares and loves Selena giving her his time and attention everyday. Taking her out to eat, buying food for her, cooking, buying her a $225,000 engagement ring. Other forums say that the ring could have estimated to almost $640,000 to $1 million.

Now that. I mean if a man isn’t loyal enough to do that, then why does Selena second guess the option of marriage?

Honestly selling her B ring in one of her giveaways…

Did she really like the B ring to start? Why would you auction off a B ring?

Now ah. Let me say. That Benny used to hang out with Hailey and her friend.

Now the rabbit hole of questions and answers to this discussion only went a bit further.

Honestly I don’t know much about the history of how Benny dated one of Hailey Biebers friends named Elsie Hewitt.. but here we are.

Wait this adds to the question.

Oh Benny….

So not only guys he was friends with Justin Bieber, but he did in fact date Elsie Hewitt in 2019 but later on broke up with her in 2020. The reason of it was disclosed to the public due to their private relationship.

So where was Selena?

In 2019 allegedly she was dating Niall Horan at the time. But none of it was confirmed, although there were numerous sightings of them together.

No wonder Selena doesn’t move on. She’s been dating like crazy not giving her enough time to heal.

2008 she dates Nick Jonas

2009 later on with Taylor Lautner

December 2009-April 2014 Justin

2014 Orlando Bloom

Later in the same year she goes back to date Justin until October of 2014.

A year later she dates Zedd for three months.

Goes back to Niall in 2015 of December

January 2016 Samuel Krost

March 2016 Charlie Puth

Goes back to Orlando Bloom that same year

January and October of 2017 The Weeknd

Goes back to Justin that same year for the final time only to break up in 2018.

Let’s continue

October of 2019 (allegedly) goes back to Niall

October of 2021 maybe Chris Evans?

August 2022 Andrea Lervolino

September 2022 Drew Taggart from the chainsmokers

March of 2023 Zayn Malik (Rumored)

I don’t know guys I don’t think she is fully on healed. This timeline says a lot. She went from Zayn Malik. To Benny Blanco in the span of 2023.

A person just doesn’t start a relationship like that, or do they? That’s only hurting her more than rather healing.

I just wish Benny the best of luck.

[tenaciouschronicler]

August 28 2024 2009

Time to loot the loot!

First up some books. The first we all saw, COLONEL SASSACRE'S DAUNTING TEXT OF MAGICAL FRIVOLITY AND PRACTICAL JAPERY, but way more worn and potentialy deadlier. Next is the FATHERLY GENT'S SHAVING ALMANAC, currently useless to John with his lack of need but very important to Dad if he locked it in the safe. But I want to bring attention to the newspaper clippings.

Very worn with the only visible date being Monday April 13, 199X. Apparently some years back meteors also rained down shortly after 4am. The ones in the paper were not the only occurrence and, suspiciously, were downplayed as 'not foreboding' or 'not really a big deal' despite creating casualties. A Crocker facility and a residential space have suffered damage. Not sure why Dad would have kept this but with the repeating 4/13 there has to be some importance. Probably a cake mix shortage knowing his love of baking.

But just to rip us back from thinking too hard on it John finds a note from Dad on the wall:

SON.

IF YOU ARE READING THIS, IT MEANS YOU ARE NOW STRONG ENOUGH TO LIFT THE SAFE. YOU ARE NOW A MAN.

AS SUCH, YOU ARE ENTITLED TO WHAT IS INSIDE. I KNOW YOU WILL TAKE THIS RESPONSIBILITY SERIOUSLY.

I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.

Youll have to excuse me as I SOB MY HEART OUT!!

Behind the note is the safe code, 02-49-13.

A couple of things happen that made me lose it laughing so hard but it should be noted one of my many questions has been answered. A blank card has only a string of 0's while a card containing a card is a sting of 1's. Each code generated is probably some sort of fusion of binary and hex though Im not even gonna try to think of what the formula is.

Ok so, in normal John fashion he captchas the card but only having three means...

Instead of changing his modus and adding the card to the deck, John punches the 2xCaptchacard bringing him to a grand total two usable cards.

John: Throw hat down in disgust.

Goodbye, hat. (HOW EVEN?? The bounce in that hat is off the charts!)

Not learning his lesson, John captchas the punched card creating a 3xCaptchacard...

Sweet Catch, Rose! The panel below this with Roses cursor slowly bringing the PDA back to John just reeks of passive agression. Do you think before you act, John? Of course not you only do...

John: Take PDA.

The two card sylladex: inventory of dumbasses.

At this point I had to stop reading from how hard I was laughing. Even putting this together is making me giggle in delight.

Luckily the tome is too heavy to get much air and instead crushes the imp unware of its fate.

Under the cut is a bunch of stuff regarding Johns leveling.

Now the level up panel had me questioning some things. Last time we saw John level up he was only at PLUCKY TOT but now we are at PESKY URCHIN. Looking back he sucessfully killed two imps during the pogo ride, presumably the EXP for the other 3 levels

Looking at the panel where Rose is building she now has 80 grist she can work with when last it was only 50. John also gained a bunch of boondollars and now has MAN GRIT. So what info can we glean from all this.

My guess is one imp slaying gained two levels while the other gained one. The next level will either again be one imp or require two imps for enough EXP. Level ups may take climbing more rungs before giving rewards, my guess is it happened at ANKLEBITER.

Rewards are also not equal among levels. The new CACHE gain is at 40 and seeing as the other two were 10 and 20 respectively means ANKLEBITER increased the cache by 30. But GEL is only at 15. In this way GEL is harder to grind for, with longer spans between gains. We cant know for sure though without seeing the whole cache list. BOONDOLLARS dont seem to have a pattern. John gained a whopping 415 which is not a pretty number to split between three levels. This last kill saw a gain of 200, so who knows what the criteria is for this. Again MAN GRIT is new so its up in the air how this one will function. Overall it seems to me right now rewards are at every second level at minimum.

*Editing to add current proposed limits: GEL 30, GRIST 120, MAN GRIT 5

[honey-minded-hivemind]

Beast Anon here! 8D Oh-ho! Wings of Fire is ICONIC! So glad to hear its merch has taken off at last! ;D

In answer to your questions, hmm...golly-gee, when it comes to your AUs there's a lot to choose from xP Although, if I had to pick on the spot...I can't help but notice your Dark AU has been getting a lot of attention lately, and I have been warming to it for the interesting twists and turns it has been taking :) I think X-Men 97 has really been going great, I'm loving it! Something I really like that I noticed recently was just how efficiently each episode manages its 20-30-minute runtime, it's another sign the show-creators put a ton of effort into the whole thing ^^ Now, my favorite platonic yandere of the week...is gonna be Beast. Always. I don't have that nifty little nickname you gave me for nothing :> Right, I'm going to be completely honest with you...I have no idea who/what Marvelade is, but, sure, if you're interested in how they'd handle the very introspective and fascinating 'What If' series, I'm all for it ^^ I've been doing very well, thank you for asking! :D And how about yourself? How've you been in the span it took me to respond? Anything new going on? ^^ In terms of topics I'd like to talk about, hmm...what do YOU think of the X-Men 97 show? =p

I am alright 😊 I planted a rose bush (I hope I did it right), and I've made a new AU...😅 That's a specialty of mine, isn't it? I have been catching up on some much-needed sleep, though, so it's good. As a kid, sleep wasn't as exciting; when you get a bit older, it is very much a necessity. I sometimes wondered as a kid, if adults at work and jobs had a mandatory nap time, if that would help with their stress? I was a weird kid, to be fair, but i think younger-me made a point to older-me.

I think X-Men 97 is doing pretty swell! It's using their time very well, as you said! Thirty minute episodes, yes! And there are a few curse/cuss words/adult words... So that's fun, in a way. The characters... I think they're sticking to their core personalities, which is good. They're acting the way they did in the Animated Series, and the show fits that theme, just a few years from then. I like Morph. I like Roberto. Older Magneto is looking well for an older guy, and now im sure he and Xavier at least had a QPR (queer platonic relationship) in that universe. Wolverine is grouchy and working on being a dad, so that's great. Jubilee is awesome, that never changes. The Jean Grey/Madeline Pryor thing was handled better than the comics did! (Yes, I actually know about that, yay!; I know a bit from the comics, just not, well, a lot😅). And I like that they can part on nice terms; let these people be friendly and have friends, darn it! Beast is still the same sweet, Shakespeare-loving furry scientist we all love (he was humming/singing classical music, that's a plus, and I didn't know I wanted that until it happened!) Storm lost her powers... I think she might get them back? But I'm not 100% certain. Maybe... 75% certain? Scott needs a vacation, a therapist, and possibly a few cups of relaxing/night-time tea, if not the whole package (he needs sleep and therapy, and I hope he gets it, poor guy needs a break-) So... Yeah, I think they're doing right by the series, they're using their time wisely, they kept the characters on point/in-character, and I can't wait to see more!!!😊💛💙

(I hope you are okay, Beast Anon! Thank you for checking up on me, and I wish you the best this week! Have a treat:🫐🥧🍓🥞🧃)

[a-bit-too-much-of-a-pokemon-fan]

Hey folks, for my benefit more than for anyone else--as this whole blog is--here's a timeline of my spring 2022, pieced together from screenshots and memories: (it gets personal and heavy at the end)

12/30/2016 - I ambitiously start a new save on Pokémon Platinum Version, my first time playing it not as a child. I immediately put it down and don't pick it up for seven years, when I take...

4/23/2022 - My first screenshot (shitty photo) of my actual first adult playthrough of Platinum, showing a Lv. 27 Luxio named Alpha. I must have started a couple days prior. (Alpha is currently chilling in Violet as a Lv. 100 Luxray, only ever used 2 rare candies)

4/29 - I defeat Cynthia by the skin of my teeth.

5/6 - The ~Breakup~ to which I allude often, which is pivotal in this story, happens

Also 5/6 - I buy Pokémon Legends: Arceus as a treat. I play it quite a bit and--despite its faults--enjoy it quite a bit too.

5/9 - I buy the red and black DS also as a treat, realize it looks like a Sinnoh Pokédex, and pop Platinum in. My in-game Pokédex reads 119 obtained. Bipolar manic response to intense emotional distress kicks in. I think, "You know what, why not catch 'em all? Better yet, why not make a Living Dex?"

5/11 - I catch 19 Bidoofs to fill slots in the PC where mons i can't possibly catch would go so I can actually track who I still need. Out of spite, I name one "MANAPHY." Pokédex reads 155 obtained.

5/16 - Pokédex reads 183 registered. I've caught almost every Pokémon possible on one cartridge of Platinum.

5/20 - Content to move everything forward to White, I pick up my playthrough of White that I abandoned in freshman year of college when my Gold DS broke. I'm 7 gyms in already, time for the home stretch.

5/24 - I beat White. Hell Yeah. This will become my Living Dex save until October.

5/28 - I move all my Pokémon forward to White and document everything in my save. Pokédex reads 185 registered. Play clock is at 159:35. I reset. Time to Nuzlocke.

6/1 - First photo evidence of my Nuzlocke, showing me in a very dire spot against an enemy ace trainer's Luxio.

6/7 - A screenshot of PL:A in the Basculegion quest. I guess I'm still playing this here and there.

6/21 - I beat my first ever Nuzlocke. Play Clock at 141:31.

And that's how I played 301 hours of Pokémon Platinum Version in the span of two months. That's 12.5 days, or 20.3% of all the time in that span. That doesn't even count the time in White or P:LA. Keep in mind that for April until the breakup I had four classes, and from then to September I had an internship that demanded 20 hours/week (quite a bit of the grinding in the Nuzlocke happened on the clock). So it's not like the only thing I did was play Pokémon.

You know what? I'm not embarrassed. I was heartbroken. I was lonely, home for the summer, away from all my friends and almost every other distraction. I needed something to fill the gaping whole in both my heart and my schedule. Pokémon was there for me. So was my family, and so were my friends (digitally). I wasn't alone, especially not with all those damn Pokémon I caught.

If anything, I'm proud of myself. I've been to incredibly dark places. When I was younger, it got so bad I did something that leaves scars on me to this day. This time, an older, stronger, more hope-filled version of myself channeled my manic energy and overwhelming emotions into something entirely harmless: a video game. Better yet, I made personal achievements out of it. For the first time ever, I had completed a regional Dex, and I attempted--AND WON--my first ever Nuzlocke.

I joked that I switched mains in Smash Bros from Samus to Pokémon Trainer because I played a debatably unhealthy amount of Pokémon. The debate is in why I played so much. Was it unhealthy when it kept my emotionally stable? Was it unhealthy when it might well have prevented more self harm? I think not. You hear that, kids? Playing Pokémon for a fifth of your time is healthy in all situations forever. Obligatory /s.

[fladurblegon]

Skip the small bits if you don't feel like reading this entire thing.

I am a step below a management position, think assistant to the regional manager type job except I work more hours and have some influence/standing (I was quaking in my boots when I accepted the job)

To get this job in the field I work in, you've got to be good at what you do and have quite a bit of experience. However, even with only a little over a year's experience with no prior work in the field, I was recommended. Aka, I'd made a relatively strong name for myself in a very short span of time as being reliable and efficient.

Fast forward, it's been nearly two years now, and I've never really been pulled up for any type of mistake at work. Yesterday, my manager pulls me up and says "you're in trouble" while smiling and saying to another manager, "I love saying that." Now, my manager knows I've got pretty hefty issues with anxiety, so that by itself was a not so cool thing to do, which I actually made a comment about in this situation, it was disregarded.

She then proceeds to accuse me of doing a very hefty mistake over the course of the last three months, when I told her I knew that wasn't possible, she shut me down. She proceeded to leave, and I sat down with the other manager and had to skip eating lunch that day (I work a job where I'm constantly moving) to prove I hadn't done what apparently a whole group of people had been doing that I'd been lumped in with. So, I'm proved completely innocent, and when my manager came back and found out, she said nothing, no apology. No nothing. If she'd taken the 20-30 minutes time that I had to actually investigate her accusation she would have seen she was incorrect. The fact that she knows I'm a perfectionist, have really bad anxiety and previous workplace trauma, and still did what she did with no evidence.... If I didn't adore my job I think I might have quit.

Anyway that's my hateful rant for the entire year probably. There are some truly angry things I'd like to say but tbh I think I just wanted to get it all out. I'm Sorry to you and your inbox 😬✌🏻

The wild part about this is how completely dismissive your boss was when you had a very clear defense. Getting in trouble at work is stressful on its own, but getting in trouble for something that had nothing to do with you is just absurd.

Frankly, if this were to happen to me, I would probably file a complain to my boss’ superior. But, I’m glad that the other manager was there to support you. At least there’s somewhat of a happy ending

[rosecentaur1916]

Warning! Lots of word vomit! It was because I found it fun to go down the rabbit hole!

There could be an argument that Cecil is in his late twenties if you go 5 years either way, but Oscar was 33 at the time the movie came out, which means he was 32 during filming. I usually (as a rule of thumb) go by actor age unless explicitly stated or shown like in Moon Knight:

Or stated in media surrounding something he's been in like most of the Star Wars books for Poe:

So, Cecil could be at the youngest 28 and eldest 38. That's a span of 10 years give or take. So yes, soft-girl-musings could be correct, but I argue (argue meant in a friendly debate type way) that he is older. I've seen the movie and those in that age range can also be a mess because of mental health disorders (Hi! Hello! To quote Obi-Wan Kenobi "Of course I know him, he's me.") especially since Harry describes him as:

"Cecil is a good guy too. He's got his issues like anyone else. He was just in the hospital again. Sometimes things get really hard for him and his head doesn't work the way its supposed to and shuts down. He just shrinks away." That (to me) sounds like bi-polar disorder. The whole movie could be seen as a manic episode spurned on by his cousin. Anyway, I bring up this because (some) people (like myself) with mental health issues are messes in their late 20s to 30s (and sometimes older). I've always read Cecil to be in his early to mid 30s. Without going into spoilers there are several reasons I think this that all are explained by, speech pattern, slang terms, actions and mannerisms that scream this to me as someone in her mid 30s. There are so many things that depend on the movie itself to illustrate my point. For instance, there's a scene where somethings happen and the line of reasoning (Yes, the man does use his brain sometimes) seems more mature than it would be for a man in his twenties. There are references that Harry, Cecil and the people they run into through out the film use that betray that Harry and Cecil aren't only around the same age, but grew up at the same time and consumed the same media, so thus born probably in the late 70s or early 80s. The biggest indicator for me is their hobbies outside of their "work" and the events of the movie itself. Neither of them are shown to own anything more advanced than a CRT television. Neither own a cellphone and smartphones were a thing in 2012. They play Candy Land, talk, drink beer, do drugs, eat (they love food) and Harry even does puzzles in his down time. Its touched on once and never again, it doesn't have to do with the plot, so I figure its a a small spoiler that won't ruin anything plot wise. Anyway, that speaks to me that their older. Heck, they maybe be older than even I speculate, touching into that older 30s range. Heck the way they dress could harked back to Gen X's punk and grunge aesthetic reflecting that they just didn't care what people thought of them. Most Gen X teens that grew up in the 90s dressed like Cecil and Harry do:

Heck some millennials (Hi! Hello, again! In the words of Obi-Wan Kenobi "Of course I know him. He's me." again.) dress like that too, which does lend to the argument that they could be in their late twenties as I was actually in my mid twenties (24 to be precise) at the time when this movie came out. I'm a mid-range millennial as the generation started in 1981, so that lends to both arguments. The encyclopedia Britannica describes millennials as:

I was going to reference Brian Petsos' birthday too, but I can only find the day and not the year. I found one answer that isn't there or verified anymore that said it was November 30, 1999 and his IMDB says October 16 with no year. I'm not sure which is correct. Though if he was born in 1999 that makes no sense. His earliest acting job is in 2007's "This Town" and from what I could find he looks like he's in his 20s, so he clearly wasn't born in 1999! So, I'd think from that he and Oscar are more than likely around the same age, which, because Brian Petsos wrote "Revenge for Jolly!" That more than likely means he wrote Harry and Cecil to be around his own age. If Brian is at least a year or two younger than Oscar that would have made him 30 to 31 years of age.

So I think this lends to the idea not only that Oscar and Brian are around the same age, but Cecil and Harry are too. I also think that lends to the idea that Cecil and Harry are in their early 30s rather than their late 20s. Yes, there is a difference, even if its only a few years. I know, I know I've over thought this... I tend to do that a lot, but its fun for me to go on these little journeys. Plus showing evidence of why I think what it is is kind of fun too. I don't mean to try to "intimidate" anyone with words. I just like writing essays. I hate when people accuse me of that. I run away with it and get into the nitty gritty which is fun for me. Anyway... after a ton of crap you didn't ask for... I still think Cecil is in his thirties. If you wanna watch Revenge for Jolly! Its up on Pluto TV and Roku Channel for free.

How old is Cecil? I haven't see the movie yet but I can't find any info about his age

@soft-girl-musings says "late 20s bc he's a Mess™️"

so imma trust her bc i also haven't seen the movie yet 😭

[kitspindles]

Nobody crucify me for this but I really don’t get why people are so mad about the “Percy is still 17 thing” because like… Rick’s explanation made sense enough to me? In a book series that’s spanned almost 20 years now and takes place in “our world” but not “real world time” (and where there’s schist like literal gods and monsters), people are fuming that the timeline doesn’t make sense with all the references to pop culture? Like, we already know the actual plot timeline within the books is a little screwy and not perfect, but why are we all big mad out here trying to fight the author in a Denny’s parking lot? Just because Percy isn’t canonically 18 yet? (Or 30 something). I don’t blame him for keeping Percy on the cusp of legal adulthood with the way some of you guys have been acting lately.

There’s no year ever given in the books to date the exact time of Percy’s adventures (or his birth year) because, like Rick said, his adventure is happening whenever you pick up the book and read it. Yes, there’s a wide range of pop culture references and jokes from over the years in the series but like… so what? He writes jokes that the current audiences and year will understand, that’s all. The series has been going for, what, 17 years now? And new fans of varying ages are always joining. The series and the jokes are ever evolving to reach these newer fans (many of whom are elementary and middle school aged, remember). As far as I know he never claimed for there to be a strictly linear timeline based in our real world time. He’s kept stuff vague on purpose to avoid giving exact years.

I think we all forget that The Lightning Thief started out as a bedtime story for Rick’s son, and that it took some time to even be accepted and published as a book. He didn’t initially set out to create a whole series with 15+ books spanning almost 20 years. I’m sure he didn’t know how large and expansive the series would become, and so that’s why there’s no set in stone timeline. Some authors give their series set years and stick with it throughout (Cassandra Clare, for example, has a whole intricate timeline going for her Shadowhunter books and sticks to it like glue), and some don’t. It’s just how it is. And most characters don’t tend to age outside their books… so yes, Percy is still 17 because, as of The Tower of Nero (which came out 2 years ago now, btw), his last canonical book appearance, he had yet to celebrate his 18th birthday or even officially start college. Just because we’re out here “celebrating” his birthday in the real world doesn’t mean he’s actually aging. It’s just a little goofy thing because he’s a popular character.

Are people just mad because this character we grew up with who kept aging in the books is now frozen at 17 (because his story is done) and we keep aging? We do need to remember that it’s a kids/young adult series, ergo, the characters are all still teens and pre-teens. Not yet adults.

Anyway I’ve just been thinking about that sorry

[feyre-starborn]

I really hate acotar reddit rn with how they view Feyre as weak, no personality, and too perfect. Just recently, I saw a comment under an obv Feyre anti post that “she’s only kind and brave what now?” Idk maybe being a b*tch doesn’t always equate to being strong. I just hate how acotar reddit perceives Feyre in a very misogynistic way. It’s fine if you can’t relate with her but to say that she’s weak just because she has a different trauma response from yours is not it and is completely insensitive to those who can relate to Feyre. Saying things like “too untouchable” or “too perfect” dismisses the journey she went through in the trilogy and how she recovered from her trauma. For someone that values objectivity and canonicity in the books, acotar reddit sure likes to twist narratives just to lift up their faves.

Hey there <3,

I completely agree. And unfortunately it’s not just Reddit. The same arguments can be seen by antis here too.

Feyre’s whole journey in the original series constantly highlights that Feyre isn’t perfect? I don’t get why they assume that she is? But it’s probably because not being perfect doesn’t mean she’s problematic either. Because she isn’t. Feyre isn’t perfect but she’s not problematic either. That’s why the antis like to twist the narrative and blame Feyre for everything wrong that happened in the series that wasn’t her fault and accuse her of war crimes or blame her for Ne.sta being SA’d. Like huh?!?! (and yes. these are real arguments made by antis in their 20’s/30’s)

Feyre has so much to offer. Ne.sta doesn’t. Feyre’s power and reputation—not as High Lady or Rhys’ mate/wife—but as Feyre, the human girl who saved all the fae, spans the entirety of Prythian and beyond. And a perfect example of this is when Balthazar didn’t want to kill N.esta—not because of Ne.stas powers that were apparently so scary—but because he didn’t want to be on the receiving end of Feyre’s wrath. Nesta’s sister. And Vassa crossed a whole continent to find Feyre Cursebreaker for help. Not High Lady Feyre, not Rhys’ mate, but Feyre Cursebreaker!!!!!

People respect and love her. People care about her and would do anything for her. People are intimidated by what she did throughout the series but still respect her. The same can’t be said about Ne.sta. No one respects her. No one cares about her. The only thing she had to offer was her powers…and now they’re gone. Literally no one gives af about her, except her two friends, her mate, and somehow the sister she abused her whole life.

And these antis love to compare specific characters to Feyre—example: Viviane—to make Feyre look/seem weaker…but all they’re doing is making her look so much better? Viviane and Feyre are friends through Mor—whom they hate. They say that Viviane deserves to be High Lady more than Feyre and even go as far to say that she is the first High Lady, yet still to this day Viviane is only a consort and that’s it. They love to act like N.esta and Viviane would be besties but completely forget that Viviane doesn’t interact with N.esta and couldn’t gaf about her. Feyre is her own person with her own powerful reputation that everyone knows—before she even became fae—, and they respect her and are grateful for her. Nes.ta is just Feyre’s horrible older sister that stole powers from the cauldron and throws temper tantrums at 25 years old.

N.esta is just a nobody sister with a reputation for being snobby and rude, while Feyre is genuinely someone to be respect and be cautious about at the same time. Ne.sta is all bark and no bit while Feyre is genuinely someone to be cautious of. She’s more sly and quiet when it comes to her threats. She may seem kind but cross her and you’re literally dead. That’s why the antis thinks she’s weak. Because Feyre is actually the one that “doesn’t need to resort to threats”. While threats is all N.esta has going for her. That’s it.

But they clearly do all this this to uplift their fave because she is both problematic and not perfect. She is the definition of a horrible character with no empathy or remorse for anyone but herself. Feyre is selfless but N.esta is probably the most selfish person in the series. Nes.ya never had to make any sacrifices, while every other character did. And that’s because she’s spoilt rotten. The antis know this. And no matter how hard they try to argue about it or justify her actions, no amount of justifications can erase what’s canon. They also know this too. This is why they completely attack Feyre. Because they’re relating a little too hard to N.esta and her treatment of others especially Feyre. So that’s why they feel the constant need to make N.esta look like a hero, while victim blaming Feyre and trying to turn her into a villain. Because they feel a little too guilty and don’t want to confront that part of themselves so instead they attack Feyre and those who relate to her while enabling N.esta and her fans abusive behaviour. Because they know they’re wrong and can’t stand it.

And it’s also because N.estas/Ne.ssians story was such a flop that they are going feral with the rage and disappointment and feel the need to take it out in the Feyre fandom because Sarah literally loves Feyre so much. They thought Ne.sta would be a “queen of queens” but she wasn’t. She’s just a useless side character again by the end. The purpose of n.estas story and powers was literally just to continue Feysand’s story and set up this crossover, that Rhys seems to be the main highlight of because of his links to Bryce and Ruhn.. That’s it. Her story and powers are completely irrelevant while Feyre, Rhys and their story was so important for the series and this crossover.

So…No matter how many headcanons, fanfics or otherworldly arguments you make, it doesn’t erase what’s in canon. And in canon, N.esta was never a good person, but Feyre always was, even when she wasn’t perfect!!!! And if there is ever a weak character, it’s Nes.ta. Not Feyre.

[pumpkinstep]

I finally read sky and Jesus christ what the hell is happening. it seriously feels like they're using a lack of communication and willful ignorance as a crutch this time more so than usual. it's super frustrating that this newest arc seems to completely ignore any of the established events all of the clans share and throw it out the window entirely.

you'd think after all this time, moons upon moons, season after season, of starclan constantly beating it into the clans that they should stick together and be close to one another, they'd be less wary of eachother. especially after uniting to solve a huge conflict only like what 3 or so months ago? it really doesn't seem like it was that long ago. like say it was maybe a year or so ago, it still doesn't make sense. clan life doesn't move on so quickly that that span of time would be ancient history.

yet every cat seems to talk about it like that. they all talk about the whole dark forest shit like it was hella long ago.

I also think it's super weird that starclan admittedly refuses to do anything, especially since the whole of starclan rarely ever decides to agree whole heartedly on what to do with the living, so even if a majority of them decided to stay away, surely there would be some who would go against the larger will of starclan like spottedleaf and yellowfang did in the past.

Nighthearts chapters are annoying, squirrelflight is dead inside and I don't think she and bramblestar are mates anymore. sunbeams chapters are super unnecessary and I feel as though this arc would have seriously benefitted from having a one cat perspective instead of continuing to go with the split perspective thing.

it certainly feels completely out of character for the whole of thunderclan to start acting like they're the most important cats in the forest and the best clan of all despite the fact they let an imposter lead them and do horrible things without question. honestly it says a lot about brambles character, his leadership, and relationship with his mate that no cat so much as questioned him when he started acting out.

it's also super weird that they put so much importance on Firestar in the clan. like I get that undeniably he was one of the best leaders of his time but like you never see that importance and pressure to fill his paw prints carried through the rest of his clan.

literally bramblestar was raised by firestar and we never see him struggle with being another firestar. we never see him struggle with the knowledge he has to fill the power vacuum or void or whatever fire left behind with his death.

I also noticed it's even stranger when you consider a good majority of thunderclan currently are directly related to him as well. he has paws in every single facet of clan life there, they might as well rename it fireclan.

it's just annoyed that this is suddenly a big issue and focus in the clan now even though his legacy lives on in the form of like 20 something direct blood relatives in a clan made up of like 30 something cats.

I'm getting off topic but just about the whole starclan thing.

why the hell are they suddenly being so vague? like if anyone had learned anything from previous conflicts and their solutions, collaboration and clear direct communication is more important than anything, especially since what happened before. honestly I'd argue that it'd be more interesting to have a perspective of a starclan cat to better outline the conflict left unresolved there after the ashfur incident. how cool would that be? it would make sense to, it would heavily accentuate the dread and helplessness of the river clan situation just as it did with goosefeathers and shadowsights tragic efforts.

I feel as though we've gone too long with being open and connected with starclan now to pull back and turn around. why not lean into it? build up starclan culture and look more into where prophecies come from or how they receive them. hell I'd be okay if they kept that vague if they'd just lean into all the way and let us see starclans conflicts just as clearly as we see the living cats since they're all so strongly connected.

it's a serious mess and I don't see this book having a good ending. I'd like an arc to have a resolved conflict for once that doesn't bleed into the other arcs. like let's just wrap up this messy ashfur nonsense and move on. the series needs to end all together at some point and I'd rather it concluded sooner rather than later before it gets any worse.

[dystopia-fantasy]

Always read the job description -Part 1

Max was a fit, well built man. He had been body building since he was 14 and now In his early 40s he has the body of a god, but is slowly getting to the age when he needs to find another way to make money. He knows he can't take part in his competitions anymore, and needs to take it easy. He got great grades in school and college, proving people wrong that you can't be a nerd in a jock body.

Max had some money saved and was able to keep up on bills for a few months but needed a job to keep his large house, in the rich area of the city. He got a call from a business he applied to a couple of days ago, telling him to go in for an interview tomorrow, and if it goes well he will be sent straight on a trip for the company. He gets his new blue suit ready to be worn the next day.

The morning arrives, it's 5am, and Max wakes. He does his normal morning routine, making breakfast, working out, taking a shower, then gets his suit on ready for his early morning interview. Driving to the office building in the middle of New York, it's at least 50 stories high, and is made of mostly glass, and is one of the newest modern builds in the city.

On arrival a large man in his late 60s wearing a suit greets him, "hello sir, you must be max, Sir Mammon is on his way down to collect you, may I say what an amazing suit you have on today".

Max looks the man up and down, seeing the man's huge belly flowing out from under his dress shirt, showing a massive W shape, "thanks mate, you might want a bigger shirt" then points to his belly.

"sorry if I offended you sir, but all clothing has been chosen by Sir Mammon himself" Mammon is the big boss of the business "if you would like to make a complaint I can print you a form".

Max laughs, "No thanks, I'm gonna sit over there, tell Mammon im there".

"will do sir, have a great day" the man says while max walks away paying no more attention to him.

About 15 minutes later a young handsome slender man walks over. "Max is it?" He says behind Max.

"yes.." max says confused.

"I'm Mammon, nice to meet you" he smiles holding his hand out for a shake.

"oh hello Mammon, is wasn't expecting someone so young, no offence of course" max shaking his hand.

Mammon let's out a little laugh, with a little grin "it's ok max, people don't expect someone like me to own such a remarkable company like this one would you like to follow me, we can go up to my office, this is Mark by the way, he's my Butler". Mark is another large man aged around 50, he has a massive belly stuffed into his suit, hes huffing and puffing, like he ran a marithon, "don't mind him, most of my staff are..."

Max cuts him off "fat?"

They both laugh, "you could say that Max" the elevator arrives and they all walk in, "now max, you did read the whole advertisement correct?".

Max didn't, it's was 48 pages long, who would read it all? He just looked at the wage he would get, it started at $100,000 per month. "Yes, I did".

"that's good, most guys are more keen to keep their body's but I guess if your struggling you'll do anything."

Max now confused just nod's and watches though the glass elevator as they fly up to the top floor.

"where here sir" Mark the butler says peacefully in his British accent.

They walk into the room, and Mammon sits at his desk pouring himself a glass of wisky, and Max one too. Max looks around in aww, the room was covered in art work, with the walls painted in golds and whites and had its own bar. "How do you have all this money?" Max asked.

"a mix of many things, this company, and a few investments paid for this whole building, I have many other ways but we're not here for that." Mammon points at the seat," take a seat max" Max sits the chair is made from leather and is very comfy. "So, max, I've gone through your file, I think you're perfect for the job."

"so, does that mean I have the job?" Max replies confused, expecting to be asked a question.

"well yes, if you agree to the terms"

"terms?" Max still confused.

"well yes, you expect to be paid 10times the amount the normal person for this job without any terms or conditions?"

"well I didn't know.." Max gets cut off.

"Max let me simplify them for you. You sacrifice your body to the company, and in trade you get, $100k X the amount you weigh paid into your account per month, So if you weigh 450lbs, you get $450k a month."

"what the fuck? That's sick, I'm not doing that, I'm leaving" and with that Max got up from the chair and stood face to face with Mammon, with the desk all that is separating them. "Your sick, you fa**ot".

With that Mammon's eyes glow a bright red. "I'm a what?" Max got through back against the chair by an invisible force. "Max you could have just left with your freedom, but now look what you've gotten yourself into".

"Let me go, What the fuck?" Max says while traped against that chair, it chreeking with the force of his muscle.

"I'm a fucking demon max, I'm never going to 'let you go'" he took a second break to mock max, "now, what did you say? Fa**ot, was it?".

"fuck, I didn't mean it" the force pins him down harder, trapping his arms against the leather chair arms, and pushing his legs against the underboard. "Please let me go home, I won't do it again."

"shut up max, the process is already starting".

Max looks down to see his body deflating, his pecs turning from mountain peaks to a flat surface, his giant powerful arms turning weak and light. And then looking up he sees a whole new man infront of him.

"Not as big as I thought I would get, but boy I'm big" he took a break to admire his new giant arms and pecs.

"what the?" Max looks in confusion, "how did you do that? Give me them back".

"what are you gonna do max? I'm an infinitely powerful being and you, your an old man, or at least your going to be."

"I'm only 42, what do you mean, going to be?"

"you see I don't have my infinite life span on earth, so to stay alive and in this fit body, I absorb anything a guy has and I want. In your case, these massive muscles, but then I need to absorb their life force as well, in order to make sure I don't age."

"what do you mean life force?"

"well, you have roughly 50 years, worth of life left, I'll drain about 20 years leaving you in your future crippled body at around age 60, force you to work for the company for another 20 years, then when your 80 drain the rest of your life, which after you get fat won't be much, then you got to hell."

"man your sick, let me go, LET ME GO!".

A bright red light shoots from Peters hand enveloping Max's whole body, and he starts to age, his face wrinkling, skin dropping, eye sight worsening, hearing getting muffled, and mind changing a little. "Max, you ok old man?".

"yes sir" max was confused in his mind, why did he say sir?

"max, you ready for your Cruise? You can have tones of food for the next 6 months."

"Yes sir, I'm ready" max lifts his head, opening his eyes to see a new blurry room from his new old eyes.

"you're gonna need these from now on" Peters eyes glow and a new pair of glasses appear on Max's face he can now see clear.

"thank you... Sir", max blinks seeing Peter infront of him, "what have you, done to me".

"Max, I've turned you into the perfect office worker, old, brainiac, who is soon going to get fat and live the rest of his life, in an office chair for me, don't worry for accomodation you live here now, we have apartments on floor 30 to 40, all workers live here, it's policy, we have also sent a team to your house to, well, blow it up, that way nobody is going to be looking for you, becuase we can plant a body"

"give me... My.... Body back, give me... My.. life back."

"Max we both know that will never happen, now enjoy a life of gluttony, and prepare yourself for hell, that's gonna be worse then anything I can do to you." Peter snaped his fingers and a red glow enveloped max.

Recovering from the glow max sees two men infront of him with a trolly of sorts between them. "Is he awake" one says,

"I don't know" said the other.

"im- awake" max said in a much older raspy voice.

"good we can now start the feeding" the man on the left said, his body as muscled as a god, ripped from head to toe, and we can see everything.

Max rubs his eyes under his glasses and opens them again, "Fucking hell, put some clothes on both of you".

Both men where nude, one a ripped god, another muscled up but with a big gut. "Clothes are banned here mate" the beefy man said in a type of Australia accent, "you cant say much fella, look at that tiny pecker".

The men laughed pointing at Max's shriveled up old cock and low hanging balls, "what the fuck"max tries to move his arm to cover him but his arm doesn't move, he looks down to see him stuck in a chair, with a cut out hole under his ass, and straps tying him down, trapping him. "What... Are you gonna do to me?" Max asked sceared.

The men laughed at him again, "no need to act to sceared, we're here to feed you for the next 6 months".

"but... Sir said..." Max get cut off.

"he said you'd be going on a cruise? Fucking hell are you dumb? He's a demon, you shouldn't trust a demon" The muscled guy says.

"bro let's start the feeding we have 50 other guys to see and I wanna watch football Tonight." The beefy guys says, and in unison both their eyes glowed a bright red, showing they where demons too.

The trolly between them had several items on top, one long tube, which floated in the air for a few moments before shoving itself down maxes nostril and deep into his stomach, his head flipped back trying to wriggle it out, but it was stuck. Another item moved into his frame, a IV bag holder, holding a giant barrel type object made of glass, and two large bags floated of the table again and started to drain into the barrel, and the tube connected itself to it, starting a flow of the liquid into maxes stomach.

"done" the beffy guy said. "Now we'll be back tomorrow to refill your barrel, and clean you up if you make a mess, but youll basically be unconscious for the next 6 months, due to the drugs were feeding you."

"so enjoy your sleep mate, you'll litterally wake up a different man." The two men laughed and walked out, max tried fighting the restraints but in his crippled form could do nothing. The door slammed and locked, and the room fell dark, max screamed begging into the darkness to be let free, and to have his life back, which he had only an hour before, but nothing happened, nobody came. He felt the drugs taking effect, but tried to fight back, but it was useless, his body slumped and loosened. His mind fell blank as he drifted of into his 6 month hibernation.

[cyclogenesis]

For the writing ask (you don’t have to answer all of them since I probably picked too many, sorry!): 1, 2, 7, 8, 10, 19, 20, 26, 30, 31, 32, 36, 38, 39, 40. (Thanks 💜)

I did it, I answered all of them!! (Yes, it took me a couple of days aha.) Thanks for asking anon! 😘

1. Which of your fics would you keep the basic plot of but rewrite completely?

Generally speaking I would rather die than rewrite anything ever, and most of the stuff I’ve written I can look back on and be like “nice”. I did recently reread a few bandom fics I wrote and felt mildly horrified by the fact that some of the writing was so spare that the dialogue sections were like reading a screenplay, so I’d have to say those would come the closest. Like I wouldn’t actually ever rewrite them, but were I to write them today they would read very, very differently.

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

Honestly I read soooo much Hydra Trash Party stuff and would love to vibe with Bucky’s sexual trauma in fic more but I feel like I’d really struggle to write that kind of background given my usual writing style. That’s the kind of super iddy thing I usually do in chatfic, but unfortunately I don’t have anyone to do that with in this fandom, so I’ll just keep whining internally about the lack of HTP Sam/Bucky while doing absolutely nothing to address that glaring lack.

Rest of the answers behind the cut!

7. Your favourite ao3 tag.

I cruise the Bottom Bucky Barnes tag like a 50s kid dragging Main.

8. How slow is a slow burn?

HERE’S THE THING. So if I ship something super hard, like hard enough to write or read fic about it, then I have already interpreted the canon itself as a slow burn because presumably they haven’t kissed yet, and I’m writing or reading fic because I’m ready for the kissing to be happening. I also don’t tend to read a whole lot of long fic. So basically I’m gonna need kissing by at least the 15k mark unless it’s like, masterfully written.

10. Top three favourite fic tropes.

You know, I’m honestly not usually drawn to stuff that’s very traditionally tropey! I don’t write it too often either, usually with fic I’m just a simple gal who wants to look at canon and then figure out a way to get them to acknowledge they want to kiss each other. I do love fake relationships though!

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

“There’s more than one Loki,” Sam is disturbed to tell him. “A bunch more. One of them is a good guy now.” Actually, Strange had described him as ‘moderately helpful and uncomfortably sincere’. “Another one, uh, broke time, and now there are multiple timelines that have created different universes.”

“Got it,” Bucky says, in the tone of someone who in no way has it.

20. Do you work on a single project or many at the same time? How does that work for you?

I usually have a couple of things going at once that I bounce between until I decide that I’m Going To Finish Something, Dammit and force myself to focus on just one. It’s generally fine because I’d rather have too many ideas than none at all, though I’ll sometimes inadvertently cannibalize myself and have to edit out things I’ve used in two different WIPs.

26. What would you describe as OOC?

I’m honestly pretty forgiving about that, having been trained to suspend my disbelief by liking really dark fic hahaha. One weird thing that tends to throw me in not-dark fic is a lack of humor in the dialogue. I tend to like fandoms with pretty funny characters or people, so I like to see their sense of humor reflected in fic. Sam and Bucky in particular are really funny characters in their own ways - gimme the banter, please!!

30. Describe a fic that almost happened, but then it didn’t.

In so many fandoms I’ve had visions of an OTP epic spanning years and years, and in zero of those fandoms have I ever completed one of those stories.

31. What was the most difficult fic for you to write (but in the end you made it)?

There is a point where every fic feels like the most difficult thing I’ve ever written. Something particularly cute that I do, which I love, is writing very intensely up to the sex scene, and then getting shy about it and wandering away and not working on it again for a little while, despite the fact that usually the whole point of the fic is that I want to get to the sex scene!!!

32. Do you have a word/expression that you always use in your writing?

I’m sure I have plenty of things like that!! I try to edit repetitive things like that out because when I’m reading a lot of a writer’s stuff little phrasing quirks always stand out to my copyeditor brain. That said, I know when I’m doing it and still tend to huffily be like “well that’s the best way to phrase that action!!” so, whatever.

36. How do you come up with fic titles? What’s the one you’re most proud of?

I either have a title from the jump or I’m combing my music library for a lyric snippet I can use like ten minutes before I post the fic. I’m pretty fond of This Is A Song About Fucking in that I committed SO deeply to jacking myself off there; it’s a phrase that Brendon Urie used to say to introduce Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off during the Nothing Rhymes With Circus tour (I had to look that tour name up. Thank GOD I had to look that tour name up) and I used it for a 5SOS group sex fic posted a cool eight years after that tour (which I went to multiple dates of, oh god) ended.

38. “This never happened” fix-it fics or “this happened but” fix-it fics?

Definitely the latter, when a canon makes a lousy choice I’m usually like well here we are, let’s talk about where we go from here. But I don’t really look for anything with the fix-it tag in general, once the canon breaks something I loved I’m usually so moody that I just abandon ship and stop reading fic haha.

39. Wildest AU scenario you have written?

I verrrry rarely write AUs for posting, but have chatficced some truly bonkers nonsense in my time. My old writing partner in bandom and I used to get weird with Brendon/Ryan - the satyr/fairy and fisherman/selkie days were really something.

40. Write a 9-word fic.

I’m too invested in the thing I’ve written 5k words of these week to think of anything new, so here’s a snippet from that instead.

“Come here,” he chokes out, and the helpless hope on Bucky’s face in response nearly undoes him completely. He sits up to meet Bucky halfway, grabs at his shirt the moment he’s within reach and drags him close, Bucky climbing onto the bed all long limbs and graceless need. The kiss is a surprise only in how rough it is, a hard press of lips like Bucky’s greedy to touch Sam any way he can, like this is just another way for them to collide.

[citylightsbooks]

The Motor of the Essay: Rachel Kushner in Conversation

This is an excerpt of a free event we held in conjunction with Litquake for our virtual events series, City Lights LIVE. This event features Rachel Kushner in conversation with Dana Spiotta celebrating the launch of The Hard Crowd: Essays 2000-2020, published by Scribner. This event was originally broadcast live via Zoom and hosted by our events coordinator Peter Maravelis. You can listen to the entire event on our podcast. You can watch it in full as well on our Youtube channel.

*****

Dana Spiotta: I know that everyone's going to ask you these questions about writing fiction versus nonfiction. And I read somewhere that you said, with your novels, you begin with imagery more than an idea or a character. With the nonfiction, there is a range of pieces about writers and specific books to journalism--like the prison story and Palestine--and then there’s the ones that are personal essays, right, like the girl in a motorcycle. So I guess they might all have different origins. But where do you begin with that? And how is that different as a process from what you write in fiction?

Rachel Kushner: Yeah, so it is kind of a different process for me, although I sometimes feel guilty to try to make declarations about which is harder, or how one does one thing, because you know, for some people, the essay is what literature is.

For me, fiction is more difficult. And so in a certain way it's what I've signed on to do with my life, because the process can be so mysterious and fickle and unreliable. And I'm waiting to catch a wave, or get the drift and then try to figure out how to sustain it, and then how to change it in order to sustain it. Managing so many different things at once is a very curious hermeneutic, because you need to know where you're going.

But then you also need to let happenstance inform you. I think some of the ways that we are challenged, and how we learn in our lives and also as writers, are by having encounters that we did not anticipate or predict, and that happens in fiction. And then you're kind of in a "taking mode" and you know exactly what's for you and you go with it and you run.

Essays are a little different for me. I mean, obviously. Time is shorter. But usually the motor of the essay is a sprung sentence. I come up with one sentence that is doing something in the syntax and it's making something sort of declarative. And it's kind of a gambit. And it needs to be followed by another. And sometimes I'll have a whole paragraph like that. And those paragraphs will just be floating in the void of the potentiality of the essay that I haven't written yet. And I don't sweat, like, "How am I going to link this to that?" yet. Because I just know by instinct that they're both going in. And if I put them in the essay, then they are interrelated by virtue merely of their proximity to each other. Then I start to build links.

Some journalism is a very different process. Like you mentioned, for the piece that I wrote, originally for the New York Times Magazine, about prison abolition and the carceral geographer, Ruth Wilson Gilmore, they said it can be any length and made it long. So you know, it was like 20,000 words. And it was my version of that essay, and it probably was a pretty good essay. But I think the weakness in it was that I was not speaking to their audience. And they really--you have written for the New York Times Magazine--they want to be able to countenance everything you say, sentence by sentence. It's not like writing an op-ed, where you just say your thing and then people can fight it out in the comments. They want to be fully on board. And I wouldn't want to have to do that all the time.

It's extremely difficult, because you have to keep remembering how to bring in somebody who may have wildly different ideas about how society should be organized, and not seem polemical, not seem pushy. It's a kind of seduction I think that really benefits from collaboration with an editor. It's arduous, it takes time. That essay took two years to write, but because the subject matter was important to me, ultimately, I decided it was worth it.

Dana Spiotta: Yeah, it's such a great essay. And I learned so much from it.

Peter Maravelis: When you're writing about events and feelings from decades ago, how do you return to the experience? What takes you back?

Rachel Kushner: That's a really great question. So, you know, with some of these essays, like the first essay in the book called “Girl on a Motorcycle,” which is about the Cabo 1000--a no longer existent, illegal motorcycle road race where you span the Baja in the course of a day--was the first thing that I ever published and I wrote it 20 years ago. And after looking back over it, in order to put it in this book and to improve upon it, I opened it up; I wrote a new beginning and a new ending. There are so many details and scenes in that essay that I never, ever would have remembered had I not written them down when I was much closer to the meat of that experience.

But there are other essays like the title essay which I just wrote quite recently. I'd put the book together, and I knew it was going to be called “The Hard Crowd.” And then I just basically sat down and wrote this essay. And I think, you know, as maybe you're telling a story, or going through your life, sometimes things really do sort of trigger the release of a memory. And Proust has this conception of two different kinds of memory that he calls voluntary memory and involuntary memory. And voluntary memory is the kind of fixed story that you tell, you know, "Oh, he's telling that story again," meaning it's a kind of sclerotic, hardened account that, for Proust, doesn't really have any real artistic or intrinsic wealth to it. Whereas involuntary memory is maybe when you would smell a perfume that you haven't smelled in 30 years and it reminds you of this or that. And I think that writing itself can activate involuntary memory, because you start to see into spaces you haven't seen in a really long time.

Like when I was writing this essay, I somehow ended up talking about Terence McKenna, and remembered that I'd seen Terence McKenna give this lecture at the Palace of Fine Arts. And then I saw the Palace of Fine Arts and him on the stage and where I was sitting, and who was in the audience. And so then I mentioned in the essay that this noise musician who I don't know, but I knew who he was, was sitting right in front of me. And that was a funny thing because the New Yorker called him and asked, "Were you at a Terence McKenna lecture in 1991." “Yeah, I was.” I mean he probably thought like the FBI is after him or something. I can start to see things and details in pretty haunting detail, particularity once I'm starting to build the framework that will allow those kind of involuntary memories to come up to present themselves.

Peter Maravelis: Do you feel that maybe kids who grew up in a certain era share communal memories, like growing up in San Francisco in the 70s is full of shared moments and scenes?

Rachel Kushner: Yes, I do feel that, but I would maybe even particularize it to not just an era, but to kids who grew up in a certain world within San Francisco. And I'm going to just be blunt: it's the kids who went to public school in San Francisco in the 70s and 80s. We all traversed a world together, and the particularity of that world. I'm not saying that it's special or different. Everybody has a world that they traversed, and that stays inside of them as memory. And ours is ours. And those who experienced it do feel bonded, I think, for life, in a way. And it's something I've thought about a lot since that essay was published in the New Yorker because of the number of people who reached out to me and wanted to talk about their own memories of this same world that we shared.

Peter Maravelis: In the New York Times review, Dwight Garner mentioned the phrase: “At the party, she was kindness in the hard crowd," from the Cream song "White Room." Is that in fact where your title came from?

Rachel Kushner: It is. I mentioned that in the title essay, it all becomes clear, or at least somewhat clear where I heard that song, and why I made it the title of this book. It's a good line.

To see upcoming events at City Lights bookstore in San Francisco, check out our complete calendar.