#This is what I was talking about in that one ask! I didn't get far with it but I had fun.

[multipleoccupancy]

Theo was still very nervous about the plan and he was surprised when Samantha asked him about it, though it seemed she was not asking about that at all. Perhaps she didn't want to talk about it and was trying to settle her own nerves. "Yeah we were getting on fine. I do like her, I just..." he gave a stiff sigh as Davidson's threats crept back into his head. "I know there's going to be more to this, and I think it's going to be bad." He mused seriously and shot a look to Samantha, all honesty.

"You're right about her and how she would have been thinking though," he agreed, "she'd have not listened to a word you or Odyssey said if you'd planned on leaving her behind." For better or worse he still didn't know. "I have her written permission to take the crossbow when she goes back to her own timeline though," he said insistently but playfully, hoping but know it probably wouldn't stick. He watched her for a moment, "how are you feeling?" She had to be worried still.

"Ah well Sloane's are just masters of disguise," he said cheerfully, again not realising it was being used nefariously by his counterparts. He watched as she left the crossbow behind, stole a quick glance around the office just to be sure everything was secure before he closed and then locked the door to the room with the click from a key, which he promptly handed to Violet.

"I find it's often best to use a different one wherever possible," he explained happily, "but what I use in California I can reuse in New York, that's a lot of miles between uniforms and costumes." There were only so many he could use after all. "I have noticed something as we have been talking," he then mused out loud as he turned to lead her towards the admin offices. "You speak of your father and myself in your timeline," comfortable topics as far as he knew despite being completely wrong about that. "Have you not met Orion from your timeline?" It was a careful question but in some ways loaded too, was Samantha not part of the future?!

𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 & 𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐓 @multipleoccupancy

As they stepped outside of the room and started making their way through the corridors, Samantha glanced at Theo. "How are you feeling?" She could imagine that he was nervous about the plan, but that wasn't exactly what she wanted to know. "You were having fun with Violet, earlier." She hoped it meant that he was more settled about the matter, now.

"The plan is to keep her as far away from the monster as possible." Which he seemed to have understood on his own -otherwise he might have insisted on keeping the crossbow. "But with Odyssey, we knew she would not accept to just stay behind and wait. Like that, she can feel useful, and we can be less worried about her."

Unaware that Sloane assumed he used his disguise to visit Theo's family, Violet listened as he explained how he had learned this skill. It was so eerie to think that the Sloane she knew had used it to trick and abduct her, and yet here she was, casually talking about it with another version of him. But maybe it could help her notice the disguises better?

"I never thought about it that way," she admitted, "but you're right. To be honest, I'm always tricked by the disguises of the Sloane I know. And I'm usually good at spotting disguises." Yes, she could always see right through Count Olaf's disguises.

She stepped into the office and placed the crossbow on his desk, before walking toward Sloane again. Now she would look more convincing as a cold and tired teenager.

"Do you always wear a different disguise, when you're on a mission?" He didn't know that one day he would fool Samantha and Theo for the worst reasons. He didn't know that he would use his disguises to lure Theo into deadly traps. And she couldn't tell him. She couldn't stop it.

[hmusunoo]

DIET PEPSI | K.TH

SYNOPSIS 》 Homework, exams, parents expecting the world from you and more, you just wanted a break. Better yet, you needed one. And who better than getting the resident campus bad boy plug Taehyun to help you out with that.

PAIRINGS 》 plug!taehyun x goody two shoes fem!reader

WARNINGS 》 plug taehyun, drug use, reader is really awkward and innocent she know's nothing about drugs, brief mentions of overbearing parents, unprotected sex, dry humping, car sex, corruption kink, loss of virginity, taehyun is a little bit of an asshole, cowgirl, slight hair pulling, not really proof read.

WORD CNT 》 6.3k

LIBRARY & BOOKSHELVES

You sit at your desk, the glare of your laptop screen searing into your eyes as you attempt to focus on yet another problem set. The numbers blur together, taunting you with their complexity. To your right, your history textbook lies open, mocking you with its dense paragraphs of information you’re supposed to have memorized by tomorrow. The clock ticks steadily in the background, a relentless reminder that time is slipping away. Your parents’ voices echo in your mind, a cacophony of expectations. "You have to be the best. We’re counting on you."Their words are like invisible weights, pressing down on your chest, making it harder to breathe.  

You don’t remember the last time you felt truly free. Even when you’re not studying, the guilt lingers. Shouldn’t you be doing more? Shouldn’t you be better? The questions swirl in your head, their answers always out of reach.And so, you sit there, the cursor blinking impatiently on your half-written essay, while your stomach churns from too much coffee and too little sleep. The thought hits you suddenly: This isn’t sustainable. You lean back in your chair and close your eyes, but the words and numbers are still there, painted on the insides of your eyelids.

You need to breathe. You need to escape.

The idea comes to you like a whisper, soft but insistent. Remembering what Sakura told you earlier in the day, about the one guy in school you never thought to talk to before. Kang Taehyun. He was no good, he was what everyone around town and campus called a waste of space. You had half a mind to text Sakura asking for his number. The thought feels almost rebellious. You didn’t know a single thing about weed or how to smoke it. All you knew was that he was the one person around here you could get it from. 

Would he even sell it to you? You didn't know, but you were going to try. You grab your phone before you can second-guess yourself. You sent her a quick tentative text swelling with anxiety at the questions you knew awaited you. 

It seemed your anxiety was for nothing though, as a short and sweet text from Sakura popped up on your screen not even a minute later: ‘I knew you’d cave (; here 999-000-3456’. You knew as soon as you saw her you'd be bombarded with a multitude of questions but for now you will be thankful for the solace she gave you. 

You didn't know the proper etiquette of ordering? Weed, so you didn't think it would be best to call Taehyun. You decided a simple text would do just fine. 

You: hi, how much for weed? It’s Y/n L/n btw. 

Taehyun: wtf? 

You: Sorry, can I buy some weed from you? 

Taehyun: i dont sell that. You have the wrong number. 

You: what? My friend Sakura gave me your number. She said you would have something to help me. 

Taehyun: Are you a fucking cop or something? 

You: No???

Taehyun: Whatever. if you're serious, meet me at lakeland park in 15 minutes. If I see any weird shit I'm leaving. 

Lakeland park was nearly a fifteen minute walk from you. He was giving you no time to overthink it instead grabbing you coat in a rush and bolting out the door. You pull your coat tighter around you as the wind bites at your cheeks. A fifteen minute walk isn’t far, but on a cold, dark night like this, every step feels heavier, the shadows stretching longer. Your breath clouds in the air as you walk, the rhythmic crunch of your boots on the frost-covered pavement the only

sound accompanying you. You’re not the kind of girl who sneaks out at night, let alone to meet someone like Kang Taehyun. He’s reckless, arrogant, always in trouble, the kind of boy your parents warned you about since middle school. But tonight, the weight of the day of every perfect grade, every strained smile, every pesky exam and desk filled with homework has crushed you into doing something reckless. Something that doesn’t feel like you. The park looms ahead, its iron gates blackened and wet with the mist that clings to the air. You hesitate at the entrance, fingers curling around the cold metal. It’s not too late to turn back, you tell yourself. But that same voice whispers that turning back means retreating to the suffocating predictability of your world. Straight-A student. Perfect daughter. Reliable friend. You just couldn't do that, you needed this. Bad. 

The park is deserted. The streetlights cast pale orange pools of light onto the pathways, but the spaces in between seem darker than they should. You clutch your phone in your pocket, your thumb hovering over the power button. Just in case.

The sound of a car engine idling pulls your attention to the far side of the park. There, parked near the frozen pond, is Taehyun's car. Its headlights are off, but the faint glow of the dashboard light outlines his silhouette. You almost stop in your tracks as he leans out of the driver’s side window, his dark hair tousled, an annoyed look on his face. 

“Didn’t think you were serious” He said as you walked up to the car. “Get in.” 

You hesitate, your hand brushing the cold handle of the passenger door. Pulling it open before you could allow yourself to overthink it. “I was told you could help me.” The inside of the car is warmer than you expected, the faint scent of marijuana smoke and leather wrapping around you. 

Taehyun shrugs a bored expression on his face as he leaned his head against the leather seat. His stance made you nervous. You could feel words bubbling up inside of you waiting to jumble out in a heap just like you always did in awkward silences like this. “I Just have a lot of stuff going on with school and my parents and-” 

Taehyun snorts, his amusement cutting sharper now as he interrupts the beginning of your rambles. “Well, don’t expect a medal or anything.” He leans back in his seat, his eyes flicking to the rearview mirror. “Hurry up. I don’t have all night. What do you want? How much?” 

“I have twenty dollars..” You trailed off your voice smaller now. 

Taehyun sent you a curt nod reaching down to the glove department between the two of you. He pulled out a bag filled with a green substance, assuming it was the weed. “Here.” He tossed the bag down in your lap lazily. You picked it up in your hands inspecting it with keen eyes. 

“Do..do i just eat it?” You asked him as you began to open the top of the baggie. 

“What?” He asked leaning forward, the nonchalant expression he once held was gone, now a look of shock in its place. “No. You smoke it.” 

“Oh.” Was the only response you could muster up. A red sheen coating your cheeks with embarrassment. “I-i don't know how.”

Taehyun laughs sharp and cold. “Little miss perfect has never smoked before what a fucking shocker.” His tone had a sarcastic lit to it. One that made your stomach churn with uneasiness. 

“I’m not a junkie.” You spit out at him. “I just need help with some stress.” 

“Are you implying that I'm a junkie?” His asked with raised eyebrows and an expression that spelled ‘i dare you to say that i am’

“N-no” You stuttered “I’m just making a statement about myself.” 

You shift uncomfortably in your seat, but Taehyun doesn’t let up. “What’s next, huh? Gonna jay-walk across the street on your way home? Or maybe—and this is a real stretch—you’ll leave your dishes in the sink overnight.” He grins, wide and mocking. “Oh no, the horror.” 

Your face burns, but you refuse to look away. “I’m not as boring as you think.”

“Sure you’re not,” he says, dragging the words out. He sends you a smirk. “Let me guess—late night study sessions? Babysitting? Volunteer work at the animal shelter?” 

You cross your arms, your nails digging into your sleeves. “I came here, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, and it’s adorable,” he says, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “You’re like a puppy trying to bark. Cute, but not exactly convincing.” 

The jab stings more than you’d like to admit, but you steel yourself. “At least I’m trying to do something different.” 

“Oh, you’re different, all right,” Taehyun shoots back, his grin widening. “Most people would’ve bailed by now. But not you. You’re too stubborn to realize when you’re in over your head.” You fiddled with the baggie still in your hand “I mean look at you, you thought you had to eat the fucking bud.”  

You glare at him, your frustration bubbling to the surface. “Why do you even care? If I’m so ‘adorable,’ why not just drive off and leave me here? No one is forcing you to sell to me ” 

Taehyun shrugs, his smirk softening into something more thoughtful—but no less infuriating. “Maybe I’m bored. Or maybe watching you squirm is more fun than anything else I’ve got going on tonight.” 

“Whatever.” You huffed, rolling your eyes at him. 

“So now that we've established that you do indeed smoke the weed and don't eat it. I’ll take that twenty and be on my way now-” 

“Can you teach me how to smoke it?” The words fell from your lips like spit fire before you could even think about them. 

“Seriously.” Taehyun sent you a deadpanned look. “Do I need to like, hold your hand while we're at it?” 

“Well no..” You trailed “I’ve just never done it before..” 

“I can tell,” He said, annoyed. “Whatever I have got nothing better to do.” 

He reached back into the saame glove department that he got the weed baggie from, pulling out a small pack of papers in his fingers. 

“These are wraps” He explained handing you the wraps. “We’ll put the weed into it before we smoke it.” 

“You're going to smoke with me?” You asked Taehyun, mulling the wraps in your hand as you carefully analyzed them. 

“Yeah, im not doing this shit for nothing do i look like a fucking teacher to you.” He snapped. Taehyun reached his hand out, yanking the baggie of weed out of your hands and although he did it with minimal force the action still shook you. He really was such a stark contrast to who you were. He was rough, arrogant and cocky. You were shy, timid and very inexperienced in everything he was comfortable with. This was a recipe for disaster. 

Taehyun continued by showing you how to ground up the weed then stuff it into the little paper carefully. You watched as his lips poked out, licking the paper to seal the week inside. Really, it shouldn't be something you're finding hot but you do. 

“This is a blunt” He explained. You watched him with careful calculation soaking in everything he said to you. The blunt dangles lazily between his fingers, the faint ember glowing like a tiny, taunting beacon in the dim light of the parking lot. He’s leaning against his beat-up car, all leather jacket and sharp jawline, looking like he stepped out of a 90s music video. You tried to steer the thoughts away. Just mere minutes ago you were rolling your eyes at him for poking fun at you, now in the dim light of the overhead dash coupled with the hues of the park street lamps you had thought he looked..well, beautiful. 

“Alright, princess,” Taehyun says, his tone as sharp as the smirk tugging at his lips. “You begged me to teach you, so here you go.” 

And there you were back to rolling your eyes. “I wasn’t begging,” you snap, your arms crossing defensively over your chest. You know your voice sounds weak even as you say it, and his smirk deepens, like he’s already won some unspoken argument. The nerves for what you were about to do finally really creeping in on you. 

“Sure, sure,” he drawls, handing you the blunt like it’s some kind of sacred ritual. “Just don’t go crying to your choir group when you cough up a lung.” You take it with more confidence than you feel, holding it between your fingers the way he does, even though you’re certain it doesn’t look half as natural. You leaned slightly forward in your seat, over the glove department that was between the two of you. 

For a quick fleeting second you could have sworn you saw his eyes flicker downwards catching the flesh of your exposed skin. You wore a hoodie half zipped down to reveal your black tank top with tiny little lace on the top. Your cleavage was slightly visible at this angle and he surely noticed it. 

“Now, put it in your mouth,” he instructs, deadpan, and you glare at him because you can hear the barely contained laughter in his voice. 

“Do you always have to be this crude?” you mutter, but you follow his instructions anyway, the filter feeling foreign and dry against your lips. His eyes flicker over you, quick but deliberate, before he leans closer. You freeze, the scent of leather and marijuana smoke filling your senses as he reaches up to flick his lighter. The flame catches, small and precise, and his hand shields it as he tilts it toward you. 

“Breathe in—gently,” he says, his voice softer now, almost serious, though you swear there’s a hint of amusement dancing on his face. You inhale, maybe too sharply, because the burn hits the back of your throat like fire, and you’re coughing almost immediately, doubling over as your eyes water. 

He barks out a laugh, loud and shameless, but there’s something about the way his hand hovers just shy of your back, like he’s deciding whether or not to steady you. “I told you to go easy,” he says, shaking his head. “What, you thought you were gonna look cool on the first try?” 

“I hate you,” you choke out, still coughing, and he grins like you’ve just made his night.

“Cute.” He mutters. “That’s cute.” he says, and for a second, you think you catch something softer in his expression—like he’s a little proud of you for trying. 

You straighten up, glaring at him through watery eyes. “Let’s go again,” you say, more determined than ever. 

He raises an eyebrow, surprised but impressed. “Look at you, all rebellious now,” Taehyun teases, taking the blunt from your hands, putting it to his lips and effortlessly inhaling. You wish you could say it wasn’t so erotic looking, the way his lips envelop the blunt, sucking in and then blowing out like he's done it a million times over. Because well, he has. He looks over at you again, eyelids narrowly heavy. You don’t miss the way his gaze lingers just a fraction too long, though, like he’s seeing you differently. But before you can dwell on it, he’s all smirks and sarcasm again, holding out the blunt with a mock bow. “Alright, princess. Round two.” 

And as you fumble your way through another attempt, you can’t help but notice the way his expression turned darker, almost lustful as he watched you bring the blunt back to your lips tentatively.

The second drag is smoother. Not by much, but enough that you don’t hack up your lungs again. It still burns on the way down, leaving a bitter taste on your tongue, but there’s something else now—a strange kind of lightness creeping into your chest, like you’re not quite tethered to the ground.  “See?” Taehyun says, his voice smug. “Not so hard, is it?” 

You roll your eyes, but the edges of the world are starting to blur, the space inside the car feeling smaller and softer all at once. “It’s weird,” you admit, your voice quieter now. “But… kinda nice?” 

Taehyun chuckles, resting one arm over the back of his seat as he watches you. “Yeah, it’ll do that. Just wait. You’re gonna feel like your brain’s floating soon.”And he’s right. A few minutes later, the buzzing in your chest has spread to your head, leaving you light and a little disoriented. You can’t stop yourself from giggling, the sound spilling out before you can catch it. 

“What’s so funny?” he asks, arching a brow. He took the blunt from your hands, taking a drag from it. The smoke flew out of his lips in ‘O’s’ like some kind of party trick. 

Unfamiliar heat pooled in your belly at the sight, your thighs fidgeting in your seat. “I don’t know,” you say, leaning your head back against the seat. “Everything feels… floaty. Like I’m a balloon or something.” Your eyes felt heavy as you stared at him with a dopey smile on your face. The softness of the lights from the overhead light casted down on his face like a glowing frame of his face. It was a beautifully confusing feeling this way. You had found yourself wanting something from him you've never had before, something way worse and more irreversible than smoking for the first time. 

He snorts, shaking his head. “You’re high as hell,” he mutters, but there’s a hint of a grin tugging at his lips. A sharp keen to his eyes as they darken at the sight of you, leaning back against the seat, head turned towards him. Your glassy eyes staring up at him doe eyed.  

Your gaze lingered on the way his fingers tap absently against the steering wheel. “You’re not as much of an asshole as you act, you know,” you say, your voice unfiltered and soft. 

His head snaps toward you, his eyes narrowing. “The hell’s that supposed to mean?” 

“You act all tough,” you say, shrugging. “But you’re still here. Putting up with me. Teaching me. You could’ve just told me to screw off.” 

“If I recall, I did do that when you texted me.” Taehyun says slowly, his speech becoming slightly slurred. For a moment, he doesn’t say anything. His gaze flickers over you, like he’s trying to decide if you’re messing with him or not. Then he shakes his head, letting out a low chuckle, the sound sending a bolt of electricity through you and straight to your core. It was an unfamiliar feeling for you. You had never felt such intense heat and want for someone. You didn't know whether to blame the weed or your hazy mind, either way you weren't sure you minded. 

“Guess the high’s getting to you,” he says, but his voice has softened, the sharp edges dulled. His own lust lingered heavily in the compactness of the car. You are both hyper aware of the shift in the dynamic of the car. You smile lazily, sinking further into the seat. The hum of the moment feels bigger than either of you, like the space between you has shifted somehow. He handed the blunt back to you but with a shake of your head you refused it, already feeling relaxed. Your body is like jelly as you slumped against the seat of the car. 

You tilt your head to look at him, his profile is sharp in the dim light, the amber glow of the lighter from earlier still dancing in your mind. “Why are you staring?” he asks, his voice low and rough, like gravel underfoot. 

“I’m not,” you lie, even though you can feel the weight of your own gaze on him. 

“Yeah, you are,” he says, leaning back slightly in his seat, his fingers drumming absently on the steering wheel. “What’s going on in that good little head of yours, huh?”

You open your mouth to answer, but the words get stuck somewhere in your throat. The buzz in your chest has spread, making everything feel too big and too small all at once. You shift in your seat, suddenly hyper-aware of how close you are to him, how the scent of smoke and leather clings to the air between you. “I don’t know,” you say finally, your voice quieter than you meant it to be. 

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, just watches you with that same unreadable expression. And then, like the space between you is pulling him in, he leans forward, just a fraction—enough to make your breath catch. “You’re high,” he says, almost like he’s reminding himself. “That’s all this is.” His breath fanned against your lips close enough that even a mere inch forward your lips would be touching. 

You shake your head, though the movement feels sluggish. “It’s not just that,” you whisper, your voice barely audible. 

Taehyun’s hand twitches where it rests on the steering wheel, and for a moment, he looks almost unsure, like he’s teetering on the edge of something he can’t pull back from. “You don’t know what you’re saying. You don’t want this.” 

“I do,” you insist, your gaze locking with his. The pull between you feels magnetic now, impossible to ignore. The heat in your belly felt like fire only being fueled by the constant darkening of his eyes and his pure adultured need for you. You may be inexperienced and naive but you were stupid, he wanted you as badly as you wanted him. 

He lets out a low, almost defeated sigh, his fingers running through his messy hair. “You’re gonna regret this Tomorrow.” But he doesn’t move away. 

You lean forward first, closing the already minimal space between you. It’s tentative, the barest brush of your lips against his, and for a moment, you think he’s going to pull back. But then he doesn’t. 

Taehyun’s lips press against yours, slow and deliberate, like he’s testing the waters. There’s a hesitance in the way his hand hovers near your cheek, as though he’s not sure if he’s allowed to touch you. But when you don’t pull away—when you lean into him instead—he seems to let go of whatever was holding him back. 

The kiss deepens, his hand finally coming to rest on your jaw, his thumb brushing against your skin. There’s nothing rushed about it, no desperation, just a quiet intensity that sends your heart racing. You don’t know if it’s the blunt, the high, or him, but the world outside the car has completely disappeared. It’s just the two of you now, tangled in this strange, unspoken pull that you can’t quite explain. 

“You’re gonna blame this on the high,” he murmurs with a groan. “If we don’t stop, I don't know how far it will go, princess.” 

You shake your head, your eyes still closed. “Don’t stop.” for a moment, neither of you says anything, the quiet hum of the night wrapping around you like a blanket. 

He doesn’t move away. If anything, he’s closer now, his hand sliding from your jaw to cup the side of your neck. His thumb brushes just under your ear, and the touch sends a shiver skimming down your spine. “How far have you gone before?” 

You shake your head “Nothing further than kissing.” 

He pulls back a small look of bewilderment on his face “Are you sure about this?” 

You nod, disconnecting yourself for a second to look at him, although your mind was hazy nothing about the decision to go further with Taehyun was, you were sure you wanted this. “Yes” You spoke with a surge of confidence. “I want this, so bad.” 

Taehyun reconnects your lips in a messy entanglement of lips and teeth, his hands grabbing at your waist to pull you closer to him even in the confines of his car. “Tell me to stop,” he says, his voice low, almost a growl. It’s not a demand—it’s a plea, barely restrained, like he’s fighting himself and losing.

You don’t tell him to stop. You can’t. Instead, your hands find their way to him, one resting on his shoulder, the other fisting the fabric of his shirt like you’re afraid he’ll pull away if you let go. “I’m not going to,” you whisper, and your voice shakes, but not with fear. 

He kisses you again, harder this time, like he’s been holding himself back and can’t anymore. There’s nothing hesitant about it now—his lips press firmly against yours, and you meet him with the same urgency, like you’ve both been waiting for this moment longer than either of you is willing to admit. 

Taehyun’s free hand slides to your waist, gripping you just hard enough to make your breath hitch. The space between you feels nonexistent, every inch of him pressing into you in a way that’s both overwhelming and addictive. You’re not thinking anymore—not about where you are, not about how this started, not about the million ways this could go wrong. All you know is the way his hands feel against you, the way his lips move like he’s memorizing the shape of yours, the way your entire body feels like it’s on fire. 

You tug at his shirt, pulling him closer, and he groans softly against your mouth, the sound vibrating through you. Taehyun’s fingers dig into your waist, grounding you even as the world feels like it’s spinning out of control. The high from the weed makes your skin a buzz and your mind spin. 

“You’re gonna ruin me,” Taehyun mutters against your lips, his voice rough and raw, like the confession slipped out without his permission.It makes you want him even more. You tilt your head, deepening the kiss, pouring every ounce of emotion you can’t put into words into the way your lips move against his. Your hips raise slightly, searching for some semblance of friction. 

The small space of the car feels suffocating now, the air thick and heavy as his hand slides up your side, brushing just beneath the hem of your sweatshirt. His touch is searing, leaving trails of heat in its wake, and you arch into him instinctively, a soft sound escaping your lips.

“Careful,” Taehyun murmurs, pulling back just enough to look at you. His eyes are dark, his pupils blown wide, but there’s something else there, too—a flicker of restraint, like he’s holding himself together by a thread. “You don’t know what you’re starting.” 

“Maybe I do,” you whisper, your voice steady even as your heart pounds in your chest. He had you craving something you had never indulged in before, something you knew you would miss as soon as it ended. 

For a moment, he just stares at you, like he’s trying to read your mind, to figure out if you mean it. Whatever he sees in your expression seems to be enough, because his lips crash into yours again, his hands gripping you like he’s afraid you’ll disappear. He grabbed at your sweater, unzipping it until your frilly tank top was revealed underneath. When his lips leave yours, they trail along your jaw, slow and deliberate. 

The feeling of his lips sends a shiver down your spine, and you tilt your head instinctively, giving him more access.“God, you’re dangerous,” he mutters against your skin, his voice rough and almost reverent. His hands move up the expanse of your body and torso cupping your breasts in his hands. A gasp leaves your lip, a chill crawling up your spine. 

“These fucking tits.” Taehyun growled. “How has no man ever touched these before?” Your chest heaved as explored the entirety of your upper body, cradling your breasts in his hands. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and the high from the weed feels distant now, overshadowed by the way he’s making you feel. Every nerve in your body is alive, hyper-aware of his every touch, every breath, every unspoken word.

“Take this off.” He growls his lips ghosting over your collarbone as he tugged at your tank top in his big hands. You met his hands at the hem of your tank top, lifting it in one fail swoop over your head. Your top half is now completely bare and out in the open for his eyes to see. 

You didn't think his eyes could darken anymore then they already have but to now avail his irises became nearly black pools of desire. Your heart was thumping hard in your chest as your breath left you in harsh pants. He made quick work of running his hands to his grey sweatpants, yanking them down just enough to pull himself out of his boxers. His cock spring free, the rip red and angry. 

Your eyes widened at the sheer size of him. He smirked at you with a knowing look. “Cute.” He muttered. “You never seen a dick before or something.” You could tell he meant it as a joke but one single look at your expression made him realize just how little experience you’ve had. 

“I..” You trailed “I haven’t.” Your face was flush red from the embarrassment of your admittance, you hadn't even really watched porn. Seeing a dick was so obscure to you, so unheard of. 

“Come here.” Taehyun softly said as he held his hand out for you to take. You lifted your legs to gently maneuver your body over the center console of the car. The sudden movement coupled with the high that was still lingering had you feeling a bit dizzy. 

You sat on Taehyun’s lap. His hard cock now resting against your thigh. Awkwardly and out of instinct you lifted your arms to cover your breasts that were now smack dab in his face. A man’s dream you thought to yourself. 

“No, don’t do that princess.” He took a hold of your arms gently in his hands pulling them back until they were at your sides. “Don’t hide.” He toyed with the hem of your shorts and he brought his other hand to your hips, gently guiding your hips to rock back and forth against his cock. 

A gasp fell from your lips at the movement. He started slowly rocking your hips steadily against his to create just the perfect amount of friction. Your clit throb in your shorts wishing you were completely bare against him. 

“That feel good?” He asked you with a grit to his teeth trying his hardest to keep his groans at bay. You nodded dumbly, a whimper falling from your lips as you continued to allow him to guide your hips against his. 

“I..i think i need more.” Your voice was airy, a sigh that sounded a lot like a moan slipped from your lips. “More, please.” 

“Hm.” He hummed grabbing ahold of your hips with both of his hands, his grip tighter than it had been all night. “Pretty little princess wants more huh?” He was teasing you, rocking your hips faster against him. 

“Y-yes!” You squealed, as a foreign feeling twisted in your stomach, the intensity knocking you forward trying to steady yourself on his chest. 

The sudden stop of your hips had you whining as Taehyun roughly gripped your hips in his hands stopping your movements. “The first time you cum will be with my cock buried deep inside of you. Not from you grinding on it like a needy little whore, do you hear me?” 

“Taehy-” You began to whine. 

“Do.you.hear.me?” He asked again tougher this time as he snaked his hand up your neck to the nape grabbing a fist full of your hair in his hands yanking your face to be level with his. 

“Yes!” You repeated for the second time tonight. “Want your cock..” 

“Good girl.” Taehyun let go of your hair soothing the spot with his palm. “Let's get these shorts off now, yeah?” You nodded with a hum as you lifted yourself off his lap to give Taehyun easy access to slide your shorts and panties down at the same time. 

“Are you going ok?” He ran his hands up and down your sides soothingly. 

“I am” You reassured him. You bent your face down to meet his lips in a short kiss as you pulled away Taehyun smirked, chasing your lips with his own, causing a giggle to leave you. 

His hand reached down, carefully circling your heat with his fingers. “You're so wet.” He hissed, dipping a finger slightly inside your awaiting core. Your breath hitched in your throat as you watched him toy with your pussy lip and clit delicately. Your legs slightly shook from the touch of him. 

“I think you’re ready.” He nodded more to himself than you. “You think you’re ready baby?” The pet name caught you off guard stunting your ability to answer so instead you nod. 

“I need your words.” He said, more harsh than you expected. 

“I’m ready.”  You confirmed. His hands found your hips once again, lifting you up until the tip of his dick was lined up at your entrance. The knot in your stomach tightened as the reality of what was about to happen set in. You were really about to lose your virginity. Here in a car, in the middle of the night to a boy you had just officially tonight. The thought excited you? It was so purely unlike you that you couldn’t wait to do it. 

Taehyun helped guide you down on his length, the stretch of him burning as you slowly moved down inch by inch on his cock. “Oh.” You squeaked, using Taehyun’s shoulder as leverage. “Oh-” You said again. The one syllable seems like the only word you could even begin to utter. 

“Careful.” Taehyun grit the words out. “That’s it.” 

The feeling of him inside you had tears pricking your eyes as the intensity of the moment took over. 

“Stay still princess” Taehyun’s voice was soft as he gave you instructions on how to take him, talking you through it. You sat still on his lap as his cock was not fully satiated inside of you. The feeling was odd..a good odd. You felt full, entirely consumed by him. The dead of night surrounding you adds onto the ambience. 

“Move whenever you want sweetheart, you're in charge.” The heat of his hands on your bare skin coupled with the heat in the car and the weed lingering in your veins gave you the boost of confidence you needed to lift yourself up and slam yourself back down on his cock. Carefully at first, testing the waters. Taehyun’s grunt of pleasure only adds to the fire growing inside of you. You needed to make him feel good, it was now the most important part of this. 

“Fuck” He grunted as he leaned his head back against the seat heavily lidded eyes looking up at you as you bounced atop him. The pleasure was creeping up on you, the burn now a dull feeling easily forgotten about. “Keep doing that.” 

His praise served as a catalyst for you to keep moving your hips up and down on his cock. Your thighs shaking at the overwhelming pleasure and the workout you were receiving. 

“So good.” You whimpered out, the only sounds around you were the ones of the constant smacking of your ass against his lap and the moans you let slip from your mouth uncontrollably. 

“Good girl.” Taehyun babbled, resetting his arms behind his head, watching you. “That’s a good fucking girl, fucking that cock for the very first time.” 

“Am i doing good?” You chased his praise almost as fast as you chased your impending orgasm, the heat pooling in the bottom of your belly like the fire getting ready to boil over and explode. 

“Yeah baby, you're doing so good. Keep bouncing on my cock. Just like that.” Soft mews left your lips reaching your fingers out to drag down Taehyun’s clothed chest. 

“Can I help you out?” Taehyun pants desperately pawing at your hips. “If it hurts, let me know, I'll stop right away.” 

“Ok.” You whimpered pathetically. You'd allow him to do anything to you right now just as long as you continued to feel as good as you were. His hands gripped your hands tightly in his hands before shooting his hips up with one single snap. 

A gasp of surprise left your lips as he reached angles you didn't even know was possible. 

“Holy-” You breathed out “Fuck, fuck.” 

Taehyun’s hips snapped up drilling his cock into your weeping hole over and over. His balls lewdly slapping the underside of your ass. “I’m close.” He hissed, not letting up on his thrusts. 

“M-me too, I think.” You winced at the mixture of pain and pleasure consuming you. The feeling that bubbled up inside of you waiting to explode like a ticking time bomb. 

“This tight fucking pussy wont ket me go.” Taehyun’s words sent you flying towards your orgasm, becoming a mess of yourself on top of him. He followed suit not longer after pushing his hips inside of you a few more times before stilling himself. 

“Fuck.” He huffed rubbing the sides of your thighs as rested your head against his chest trying to catch your breath. 

“Are you ok?” He asked with a slightly worried tone. 

“So good.” You said raising your head to look at him. “Thank you” 

“For the sex?” He quirked an arrogant brow at you, a laugh bubbling in his chest. 

“Well, yes and the weed, and teaching me how to smoke it and-”

“Ok, ok” He laughed. “No need to thank me so much.” 

“But I do.” You said with sincerity. “You helped me alot tonight.” 

“I can always do it again..” He trailed off with a slightly nervous tone in his voice. 

“Is this a drug dealer's way off asking me out after taking my weed and literal virginity in his car?” You joked, sending him a goofy grin. He shrugged in an attempt at being nonchalant despite his best efforts. 

“Is this the goody two shoes princess saying yes?” His tone was just as goofy and airy as the both of you felt. 

“It is.” You smiled at him. “Yes, a thousand times over.” 

“Eager are we?” Taehyun jokes. You laughed, hitting his chest lightly. “Shut up and fuck me again Taehyun.” 

“Don't have to ask me twice.” 

taglist. @st1llm0nster , @blossommi , @beomiracles, @kkamismom12 , @izzyy-stuff , @biteyoubiteme , @hyukascampfire , @thetxtdevil

[rafesbangs]

𝜗𝜚 bunny!reader's snowy christmas with bf!rafe

summary; rafe surprises you on christmas day, then bunny!reader surprises him with the best christmas present he could ask for ૮꒰ ྀི>⸝⸝⸝< ྀི꒱ა

c!w; mdni !! soft!dom!rafe, established relationship, mentions of a previous argument, use of the nicknames rafey, baby, and bunny obviously, making out, heavy petting, restraints (handcuffs), i guess you could say roleplay? (she wears bunny ears), 'unprotected' sex, p in v, dirty talk, rough sex, manhandling, size kink, slight breeding kink - they go at it like bunnies if you catch my drift loll.

notes; merry christmas to those who celebrate ! either way here's a little piece about our favourite girl and rafe enjoying christmas day tehe & sorry i didn't wanna make this too longgg !

you and rafe had gotten into a huge fight over some guys hitting on her at a kook christmas party, three days before christmas, this might've been the biggest one ever.

you'd been crying for three days, absolutely beside yourself. now here you were on christmas eve, alone and driving to a huge ski cabin that you and rafe had previously booked but you'd forgotten until yesterday when you got an email from airbnb.

the drive had been quiet and dull, not even your favourite music being able to cheer you up. it was late when you pulled up to the lodge, the area completely dark as the place was secluded, you pulled your pink suitcases from the car and dragged them through the snow and onto the porch. thank god the keys were where the owner said they'd been hidden, you didn't know what you'd do if you had to find a way to get into the warm lodge at 7 'oclock at night.

you swung the door open, instantly the smell of pine hit you and you walked in, locking the door behind you and breathing out deeply as you set your bags down. you beamed at the christmas tree sitting in the corner of the big cozy living room, it was bare but the thought counted, you made a mental note to give the place a good review so far.

you headed to the huge wooden staircase, sighing and wishing rafe was here to effortlessly carry your bags, and probably you, up them. it took you pulling with all your strength, the bags bumping up every step to finally have them there. you walked into the master bedroom smiling at the soft and absolutely massive bed in front of you before frowning, remembering you would be sleeping alone on this trip.

you took a while to unpack, seeing as no one else was here you thought you might as well just do what you want and relax. it was nearing midnight when you were sat at the vanity in the corner, doing your skincare before bed. finally you cozied into the huge bed, laying dead middle of it. it felt wrong. completely bare, especially as you lay there in a little cami and pink victoria secret pants still adorning your legs when they'd normally be off if rafe had any say in it.

eventually, you drifted off to sleep, a frown situated on your face.

you thought you were imagining things when you heard jingling coming from downstairs, half awake with your eyes still closed a million thoughts ran through your head. you sat up quickly, realising there in fact had to be someone downstairs, the sound was real. what the hell?

you pulled rafe's grey college hoodie over your head before sneaking carefully downstairs, praying that someone hadn't decided to rob the place for christmas, that was the last thing you needed. when you finally turned the corner and the living room came into better view, your mouth fell ajar at the sight in front of you.

"rafe..?" you squeaked, still not knowing if you were dreaming or not. the dirty blonde turned around from facing the christmas tree, it now covered in pink, white and silver ornaments, your ornaments.

his lips tightened into a warm smile, "hey baby... sorry, i hope i didn't wake you up too early" he cooed, your heart panged in your chest, his tone so warm and inviting. but you wanted answers.

you stepped off the bottom of the stairs, "what're you doing here?? how did you even get in?" you said, brow furrowed as your tried to comprehend the fact that your boyfriend, whom you were not even talking to with, was standing right in front of you.

he sighed, putting ornaments down from in his hands and walked towards you. he grabbed your hands softly and massaged them in his, "'m so sorry bunny. i never should've shouted at you the way i did, its not your fault every guy turns his head and tries something with you. i should be honoured to have a gorgeous girlfriend, not angry." he confessed, his brow furrowing in shame as he spoke. "i realised late last night and saw the reminder on our airbnb account so i rushed here early this morning, i couldn't ruin christmas for you baby."

you were speechless. your lips formed into a thin line as you stared at him in silence for a moment, he couldn't even look you in the eyes he was so ashamed. you drove into him, your arms wrapping tightly around his waist, "i never wanna fight like that again rafe... i missed you so so much." you mumbled into his chest. he wrapped his arms around you too and kissed the top of your head.

"i know. 'm sorry you had to sleep alone here last night baby, i was gettin' all this ready" he softly replied, stroking your head as you rested it on his chest. "i hated it. and the bed is sooo big, i'm never doing that again" you huffed, pulling your face away from him now.

he looked down into your eyes with a sneaky grin, "really? hm. i wanna see"

you pulled him by the hand as the two of you walked upstairs and into the bedroom, your stuff kind of everywhere, contrasting the cozy rustic setting. he was smirking even more now as the two of you gazed on the huge soft bed, "see, it was so weird not having you next to me." you pointed out. rafe slowly nodded, scanning the clutter of your things across the room when his eyes landed on a little white christmas present tied up with a red bow.

"oh... that um, that's for you" you remarked, walking over to grab it with flushed cheeks. rafe beamed at you and sat on the bed, "you're blushing quite a lot baby, is this a present for me... or us.?"

you shrugged sheepishly, handing the box to him, he just chuckled a little before pulling the bow off and opening it. underneath the tissue paper, there sat a fluffy and white lace lingerie set, with bunny ears and fluffy handcuffs too with a little note on top that said "since you always say i'm your bunny, i'm your snow bunny today baby <3"

his lips parted has he stared down at the gift, note in hand, completely stunned. rafe had no idea that you'd be into something like handcuffs, but ever since you'd gotten comfortable, him being your first time and all, he seemed to be discovering a lot about you sexually. this was the second most shocking thing, the first being that you recently seemed to always want to have sex with him. he called you bunny affectionately for the longest time but had no idea how accurate he was when it came down to joking to topper and kelce about you two always 'going at it like bunnies'.

"oh jesus bunny this is..." he breathed deeply, shaking his head, "this is... wow." he looked up at you with wild eyes, an ecstatic grin planted on his face now. you fiddled with your fingers behind your back nervously, smiling back at him, you were so glad he loved his gift.

you managed to squeak out, "wanna try out your gift now..? or-" he jumped up and scooped your face with his big hands, planting a deep heated kiss on your lips before pulling apart, "yes now. the other gifts can wait."

heat radiated from your cheeks, you could feel it pooling in your tummy too as you grabbed the lingerie from the box, "okay rafey" you chirped, heading into the ensuite bathroom.

you swung the bathroom door open, smiling from ear to ear with the bunny ears perfectly perched on your head.

"oh bunny." rafe practically moaned, he was beside himself, his cock completely rock hard from the note and gift itself, seeing it on you now could nearly make him cum his pants.

you walked over to him, swaying your lips a little before planting your paws on his knees. he swallowed heavily, almost shaking in excitement. you'd never seen him so hard before, you could feel the hot spit pooling in your mouth, threatening to drool all over his pants. you palmed him slowly, making sure to tease at his swollen tip.

he grabbed your waist hungrily, "i'm so glad this cabin is so secluded, because i'm about to make you scream my name baby." he rasped, his gaze raking over your figure before he grinned up at you, pulling you onto his lap and immediately connecting his lips to yours desperately.

you rutted against his thick bulge, slipping little moans between kisses as the friction added to the heat in your tummy and the wetness in between your legs.

rafe groaned loudly with his hands grip bruising on your hips. "bunny- fuck, you keep grinding on my dick like that and i'm gonna cum right here, right now." he admitted, all breathy. you pulled back with a smile, your face flushed from how turned on you are, nodding you just tugged at his shirt before sliding your hands under, feeling his toned chest.

he practically ripped the long sleeve off, wanting to be skin to skin with only the lacey, fluffy bralette in the way. rafe drove into your tits, they were spilling out of the top, making it easy for him to lick and suckle on your sensitive flesh even through the cups.

your hands trailed down to rafe's bulge, wanting it out from under all the fabric now. you yanked at the button and tore down the zipper, chewing at your bottom lip in anticipation.

your face was now mashed into the bed, eyes rolling back, rafe had discarded his clothes and your panties long ago. unfortunately he did rip the stringy fabric apart getting to your wet cunt but he mumbled the promise of a replacement, besides, you couldn't care less at this point.

he was nailing you from behind, your arms in cuffs behind your back that he was tugging on. deep hard strokes as his pelvis hit your ass, causing the flesh to bounce back, leaving an amused smirk on rafe's lips. "fuck- your pussy's clenching me so good, you love being manhandled hmm?" he rasped, still driving his cock into you as he spoke. you just responded with an incoherent satisfied mumble, completely fucked out already, rafe had been throwing you around the large plush bed and he didn't intend on stopping anytime soon.

"aww 's my bunny been fucked dumb? brain not working from this huge cock?" he teased before sliding his dick out, still throbbing and erect, he flipped you over with a grin and watched as you instinctively let your legs fall open for him. your pussy was sopping with your juices, and a previous creampie rafe had released into you before going right back to driving his cock into you.

he grabbed one of your legs and threw it up against his shoulder, your knees so weak it hung loosely over. rafe began dragging his huge leaking cock over your folds, making sure to get to your weeping hole and push only his fat tip in for a second before pulling out and toying with your clit again. "mmm, rafey..." you groaned in frustration, all you could think of, all you wanted, was him continuing to jackhammer you into the bed.

when you least expected it, he finally obliged, gripping roughly on a hip with one hand and a thigh with another. "god bunny, 'm g'na fill this pretty pussy with my cum again," he strained, "'g'na be so full up, your brain's never g'na recover."

you drew out a moan, as he picked up his pace, plowing into you, the bunny ears still on your head bouncing with his thrusts. he placed a hand on your tummy where you could spot a large bulge poking earlier, pressing down and your eyes rolled back when he began toying with your clit too.

the plap-plap-plap of his thrusts beginning to grow sloppy as you were reaching your peak made your head spin. "ray! ... g'na cum-" you squeaked out just a second before your cunt clenched around him, milking him into spilling into your begging pussy, groaning gutturally.

rafe buckles on top of you, too fucked out to jam his leaking cum back inside you, "you're so perfect" he mumbled into the crook of your neck. both your sweaty bodies clung together in the sheets until rafe slowly lifted himself up, sliding out of you finally.

he ran a hand through his greasy bangs with a dopey grin, "c'mon bunny, gotta clean ourselves up now" he cooed, gesturing towards the large ensuite as he looked at the sticky mess between your thighs.

you smiled up at him, taking the bunny ears off, knowing he was gonna have you on your knees in a minute while the water rushed over the both of you.

[bitchlessdino]

with great certainty (m)

Pairing: Prince!soonyoung x reincarnated stranger!Fem!reader Genre: fantasy, isekai (reincarnation in another world), fluff, smut Word count: 1.5k  rating: R tags: Royal AU, commoner!reader, yearning, fingering, light dirty talking Summary: Love was bounded by books, at least that's what Soonyoung believed learning about love only through books, but after meeting you he realized love had none. Love has no bounds. Not even for him, a prince. author note: thank you @gyuswhore and @highvern for betareading for me and SURPRISE @etherealyoungk I'M YOUR SECRET SANTA . And thank you @camandemstudios for hosting this event! i really hope you enjoy it skye because i had a great time writing it and i tried getting really creative as possibly with the word limit we had. Happy holidays and Merry Christmas, stay warm wherever you are I hope you're have the best holiday and an even better New Year <3

Tag: @shiningstar-byulxx @misssugarlips @tommolex @hoeforhao @dkakapizzaboy @junhui-recs @svtup @buffhoshi @meowmeowminnie @caratochan @lovebot4han @camisun93 @emmmui @toruro @jeonride @novalpha @nvmrljk @feat-sun @tinkerbell460 @aaniag @tacosandbitch @kyeomiis @wonwooz1-blog @horanghaezone @stagefrjghts @pantumin @aaniag @mochisdayone @gyuguys @idubiluranghae

Soonyoung was meant for great things and that included the crown of his country. He came from a long line of Kwons, a centuries old lineage that transcended wars, famine, and anarchy. The youngest of two, the eldest and only son, and the direct heir to the throne of a patriarchal monarch. It was his destiny and everything that he's been taught has led up to this moment.

But he realized the crown meant nothing when he met you—an anomaly in his once perfect world. You came in with your strange clothing and foreign customs like you were from another world, and he was starting to think you were with how much you tried convincing him. 

You told him you don’t belong here. That you were brought here by mistake, somehow reborn in a world far different than your own. He could imagine how disorienting it must’ve been if you were telling the truth but what he did understand was that you were confused. So, suddenly, he took you in, something he never planned for.

He housed you, clothed you, fed you, taught you the proper mannerisms of his land, but what he didn’t expect to do was fall madly in love with you. Someone who wasn’t even a loyal subject, let alone royalty like his advisors wanted him to marry. 

He didn’t even think it was possible, but the emotions he felt; the jealousy, the fondness, the warmth. It all resembled what he read in love stories. The kind of love he’d envisioned having one day, that he hoped to have even as King. A true, real, unconditional love.

And although he was sure that’s what it had to be, he couldn’t be too sure.

He dragged you somewhere far, far away from his palace, but not without your playful protest. Somewhere no one would suspect they’d be. Where they could be themselves. Where he could be honest. And being Prince, let alone King, wasn’t something that mattered.

“What is it, Your Highness?” you asked with a breathless laugh, heart racing from chasing after him in the middle of nowhere.

“Somewhere private, just for us,” he vaguely answered, his grin baring in mischief.

You narrowed your eyes at him as you entered an empty cottage, furnished with the bare necessities. “Why? What are you planning?”

He sat you on a dining chair, taking one beside you. “I want to know about your world. Please, indulge me.”

You weren’t sure where to start, maybe with the fact that magic and dragons didn't exist like they did here, only concepts of them. And the jobs that the people had—the jobs you had were less labor inducing compared to here, yet less rewarding. There were things you missed and some you didn’t.

You sighed, feeling yourself get lost in your words, thinking you’ve gone off the rails rambling. You rested your hand against his that laid flat on his thigh. “I’m not good at explaining things, sorry.”

He shook his head reassuringly. “That’s quite alright. I rather enjoy hearing you talk.”

A soft smile graced your features. “You’re too kind to me, your Highness.”

“I’m to be king one day,” he proudly reasoned, puffing out his chest, “Being kind is second nature.”

You grinned, shaking your head at him amused, used to his grandeur gestures and expressions as time passed and Soonyoung couldn’t help but stare. “If I may be honest.” He accepted your hand, thumbing over your knuckles. “I had other intentions.”

“Other intentions? What kind?”

His eyes flitted towards yours, a fervent heat growing behind them as they scanned over your features. He raised a hand to bring a single strand of hair behind your ear, letting it linger on your neck. The sensation pebbled your skin and you parted your lips, eyes fluttering back at him anticipatingly as he leaned closer. He tasted your subtle savor of nectar and berries, humming in utter delight, feeling you melt against his lips effortlessly.

He muffled your moan under his lips and swiftly reeled you to straddle his lap, the fabric of your clothes spilling around his sides. He took your skirt and bunched them up in fists, caressing your smooth thighs that wrapped around him delectably. Shallow breaths escaped his lungs—followed by the fervor of relief—crushed by the tension of your body that felt like heaven’s clouds in his hands.

Your arms looped around his neck, the fire in your chest burning brighter than all your days having met Soonyoung, and you feared this one would be harder to extinguish. Mustering up the courage that barely bustled inside you to match his pace, you clung to his fervid torso radiating through his garments that were far too thin for any cold weather—still, burdened by the circumstances. 

The thought of possible consequences crossed your mind just briefly, even in the sweet bliss of the prince's tender kiss, you trembled against his touch at the thought of what could go terribly wrong if you proceeded any further.

Soonyoung could sense your hesitancy and gently parted from you, the tip of his nose tickling against yours delicately that you audibly gasped. “What’s wrong?” he asked in quiet concern.

“Your Highness—“

“Soonyoung, please call me Soonyoung.”

You melted into a smile of realization. “I don’t think I ever learned your name. It’s pretty—but, are you sure this is something you want to do? With me that is?”

“My dear…” Soonyoung beckoned you closer, hand against the nape of your neck, his lips ghosting against yours. “If I am certain of anything, your lips felt as if they were made to make contact with mine because nothing has ever felt so right until this very moment.”

“But,” you interrupted, through your heavy-lidded gaze. “You’re going to be King one day…and I don’t belong in this world,” you whispered devastatingly, anguish coloring your tone.

“But you belong with me,” he breathed confidently.

He reconnected your lips, his hand falling down your back to tug and loosen the ribbon of your corset, pouring your bosoms out of their restraints before he pressed his body against yours to catch their spillage, reveling in their warmth. “With great certainty, you my love, belong with me. Just as much as I belong with you.”

You clasped your hand over his cool cheek, finding him naturally nuzzling against your palm, his eyes narrowing back at you in a spell of adoration.  “How is it you are so certain?” 

Sooonyoung pressed his lips against your cheek, “I’ve laid my eyes on many beautiful sights in my Kingdom—,” then against your collarbone, feeling his presence linger down your neck like a hot fiery trail, “—I’ve marveled at oceans, mountains, mysterious creatures, princesses, and queens…”

Then like his gaze, his lips fell to the fullness of your breasts, kissing around their plush weight until his eyes flitted back up to meet your gaze. “Yet, nothing and no one dare stand in comparison to the enchanting enigma in front of me.”

“Y-you find me enchanting?”

“Incredibly so.”

You started to relax, hands finding themselves teasing the hem of his shirt before crawling underneath, lifting it slightly to see the sliver of his sweltering abdomen. “That’s surreal coming from you…Soonyoung.”

He hummed, finding purchase around your hips as his face buried his chin between the valleys of your chest. “Say my name again.”

“Soonyoung…”

He sighed deeply, his smile caressing your jaw before your lips joined together once more, “The Heavens seemed to have lost an angel.”

You found it easier to succumb to your urges, entangling your bodies until articles of clothing found their fates on the ground. Although doubt clouded their actions before, they wouldn’t now, not if the prince had anything to say about it. 

It was funny. Soonyoung’s hands were trained to command armies, write laws, and lead his country to their brightest possible future. Yet, here they were slipping down your undergarments, digits sinfully tracing over the aching core that fluttered at his touch.

Your stomach tensed as his fingers dipped deeper in experimentation, his eyes glazed over your expression in both interest and caution. “How’s that?” He softly asked.

“Good,” you responded, even quieter.

His fingers pushed in deeper, the pad of his thumb pressing down on your sensitive bud, and a wave of shock ran up your spine, having you shift your thighs to find his growing arousal that caused a tent in his pants. “S-shit.”

“My lady,” Soonyoung chuckled, a devilish grin gracing on his Highness’s angelic face. “That’s quite the dirty mouth you have there. Do you think a soon-to-be King would approve of such a thing?”

Despite his words, he showed no signs of stopping, watching you become a moaning mess undone merely by his fingers as you rolled your hips against his unfaltering erection. 

He was meant to have you. He felt it. He knew it. He saw it. He foretold it. Nothing could tell him otherwise.

Not even the crown.

[acanvasofabillionsuns]

[ID: The first image is a movie poster for the Dreamworks movie Home, showing Oh, a Boov (a wide, short, purple creature), Tip, a black girl, and a calico cat. The rest of the images are screenshots of sections of The True Meaning of Smekday, by Adam Rex.

In a ridiculously short amount of time, the Boov determined that humans were unwilling to mix peacefully into their culture. They pointed out all the people who fled instead of welcoming their new neighbors, even those whose homes had been taken outright. Captain Smek himself appeared on television for an official speech to humankind. (He didn't call us humankind, of course. He called us Noble Savages of Earth. Apparently we were all still living on Earth at this point.) "Noble Savages of Earth," he said. "Long time have we tried to live together in peace." (It had been five months.) "Long time have the Boov suffered under the hostileness and intolerableness of you people. With sad hearts I now concede that Boov and humans will never to exist as one." I remember being really excited at this point. Could I possibly be hearing right? Were the Boov about to leave? I was so stupid. "And so now I generously grant you Human Preserves—gifts of land that will be for humans forever, never to be taken away again, now." I stared at the TV, mouth agape. "But we were here first," I said pathetically.

The tent was strung with white Christmas lights and packed with people, all facing a stage on one end. And on the stage stood a redheaded man in a wifebeater with a Viking tattooed on his chest. People were booing him. "Shut up!" the redhead was saying. "I have the stage! All I'm saying is, now that we've all had to leave our real homes, we got a chance to get America right! There can be a place for the Saxon Americans, and a place for the coloreds, and a place for—shut up!"

"So every place has some kind of leader?" I asked. It had all happened so fast. "Sure. Most of them are former state governors, or senators, or whatever. The president runs a little town called Rye." "Just a little town?" "Yes..." said Mitch. "He's not very popular anymore, because of the invasion. People assume it was his fault somehow. But we have to have leaders. We have to have government." "I guess," I said. "Daniel Landry's district is far south of here," he said, "on some former Indian land." "Indian land? Like a reservation?" "That's right." "Is this Dan guy an Indian?" "I don't think so, no. I'm pretty sure he's white. He wasn't a governor or anything before, but he's really rich, so I imagine he's a good leader." "Uh-huh. But he's white," I said. "The Indians elected a white guy?" "Well...I don't know. I imagine all the other people elected him. It's mostly white folks living on the reservation now." I frowned. "And the Indians are okay with this?" "What do you mean?" "Well...it was a reservation," I said. "It was land we promised to the Native Americans. Forever." Mitch looked at me like I was speaking in tongues. "But...we needed it," he said.

"Mr. Hinkel," said the Chief, jerking his head toward the sleeping man. "He thinks Indians like me ought to live somewhere else. Likes to tell me about it a lot." I didn't really want to talk about Mr. Hinkel. "Well, maybe they'll let him go soon." "Doubt it," said the Chief. "Got beat up pretty good by someone who thinks gay people like him ought to live somewhere else."

The last excerpt from the book is in comic format, divided into four main panels. The first is captioned, "2,000 (two thousand) years ago - Many schools closed by the HighBoov, because Money is Needed Elsewhere. Boov are told not to worry about learning unimportant things. Boov are told to learn one useful thing that may be done over and over again and give their life meaning. HighBoov devise clever tests to find which Boov should be taught more, and which Boov should not be taught because Money is Needed Elsewhere." Boov are shown doing things like guarding, serving food, and taking care of children.

The second panel is captioned, "1,150 (one thousand, one hundred and fifty) years ago - Certain Boov who were taught many things announce that industry is polluting the waters of Boovworld." Boov in uniforms point to a chart of their world and gesture to something outside a window, presenting this information to other Boov in fancy outfits. "These scientist predict that the oceans soon will no longer be able to sustain life, unless things are changed."

The third panel is captioned, "1,149 (one thousand, one hundred and forty-nine) years ago - HighBoov declare that these warnings of pollution cannot be proven, so therefore nothing should be changed. The scientist Boov who gave these warnings are declared evil-evil that they should call our God unclean. These Boov are named the Forgotten and sent onto land into exile forever. Some of them die of asphyxiation. Most don't." A line of Boov trudge out of water onto land.

The fourth panel is captioned, "1,003 (one thousand and three) years ago - God dies of asphyxiation." There are many skeletons with lots of darkness in the background.

Plain text: "1,003 years ago, God dies of asphyxiation" End ID]

like the most politically neutered movie of all time unironically

[holymolyfizzie]

i don't wanna derail @kityana's post about stolas's pill popping, so i'm making a separate one. but something kityana said finally made me think about something: "i'm still not sure if those pills are actually helping him or if they were just given to him to numb him to how shitty his life is"

I've wondered something related to this a lot myself. but Stolas takes his antidepressants with alcohol (and in the aftermath of alcohol, like at the end of The Circus), which is a depressant. taking antidepressants + alcohol at best just cancels out your antidepressants so they don't actually do anything. but both at once, at worst, makes your depression symptoms a lot worse. taking them together is the sort of stuff that college girls get yelled at for, but i guess no one told stolas. i wouldn't be surprised if he's been popping them like candy and upping his dosage because he was told they would help him…and then they don't because of the rampant alcoholism. which is to say that we don't know if the meds even worked for him at all (i'd argue strongly they didn't, considering his alcoholism only ever got worse and he kept taking more and more pills, like they never worked enough) or if they were a placebo while he was taking them

and this might be a bit too nuanced for such a show, but as someone who has suddenly gotten off antidepressants that didn't work at all, the withdrawal symptoms don't always affect mood that much (they did nothing for it to begin with) and they sure as hell don't last a full month after getting off. in fact, going cold turkey off of meds that do work for you shouldn't have withdrawal symptoms that last a full month (if you do, it's a Talk to Your Doctor moment). i just really wonder if Stolas noticed the lack of antidepressants after the first few days beyond the old habit of taking them, and if we really can contribute much of his mental breakdown to getting off antidepressants

but you know what he was taking religiously, that did affect him for sure, and that we haven't seen him touch in a month now? the alcohol. he was drinking during Mastermind, but he clearly hasn't touched it since the trial. Blitz doesn't seem to have alcohol around, and Stolas wouldn't ask for the extra expense -- he's being forced to quit. he passes up Loona's beelzejuice at the Sinsmas party, noticeably. the beelzejuice is brought in, and Stolas immediately goes outside for a smoke instead. he's not drinking anymore. and quitting alcohol cold turkey is an insane process, esp at his level of hard liquor. we're talking about disastrous health consequences and a whole host of withdrawal symptoms -- anxiety, depression, irritability, fatigue, loss of appetite, brain fog, hallucinations, and much worse stuff (in humans, seizures). it's impossible to underestimate the severe damage alcoholism does to your brain and body longterm. and a lot of those withdrawal symptoms stay weeks after stopping cold turkey

like, i don't want to detract from him going off of antidepressants; he needs and obviously wants working antidepressants, he's desperate for them. but i'm gonna be so for real, i've had my experiences going off ineffective antidepressants, and i've watched family members try to quit alcohol. an alcoholic quitting is a brutal, drawn out process that shakes me to my core. there are reasons a person still says "i am an alcoholic" even a decade after quitting. that shit's insidious in a way that antidepressants aren't, and it was affecting stolas noticeably more, surely enough to render his meds useless. if you want him back on antidepressants, then you need a sober Stolas first, and this is what he's FINALLY working on

so i think more emphasis needs to be placed on Stolas's recovery from alcoholism when discussing his mental breakdown, irritability, etc. the fact that he's doing this without rehab or other interventions is miraculous, nearly impossible. i don't want his impressive recovery (so far) from alcoholism to end up getting buried under the antidepressant talk ngl, especially when his getting off of alcohol now means that his antidepressants may actually work in the future and help him. this is something to be so so proud of!!

[madhatterbri]

Christmas Kisses | D.P.

Summary: Reader drunkenly shows up at whoever's house, confessing her undying love for Damian and the crush she's had forever and she wishes he would just realize how much she's been flirting with him and ask her out because she's too afraid of rejection. Meanwhile, Damian is in another room and hears the whole thing. Lots of love confessing and giggling and kissing

Requested by: @eringobragh420

Damian Priest Masterlist

WWE Masterlist

Taglist: @theworldofotps @smallestsnarkestgirl @mrsarcherofinfamy @terrortwinunicorn @brideofinfamy @miss-kuki-nz @hotwheels1108 @new-zealand-chic @magicalbuttertarts @eringobragh420 @missbmc94 @surdelcielo @hodgepodge-musings

"I need your help," Y/N told her best friend, Rhea Ripley. She stumbled in the living room and sat on the couch.

"Oh, darling, I think you've helped yourself enough," Rhea commented and stared at her friend. She smelled like a walking bar.

"He still doesn't get I like him! Today, we hung out for lunch, and he was completely oblivious. I did everything to make it obvious,"

Y/N laid on the couch dramatically. She stared at the television screen. Rudolph the Red- Nose Reindeer was playing. Clarice had just told Rudolph she thought he was cute. Even reindeer had more game than she did.

Rhea feigned like she had no idea what she was talking about. "Who, darling?"

Y/N groaned and sat up. She stared at Mami and crossed her arms. "You know who! Damian. Maybe he just doesn't like me, and this is his way to reject me?"

"I don't think so. Men are just sometimes very oblivious," Rhea answered truthfully. "Did you try asking him out?"

"I don't want him to reject me," she answered barely above a whisper. The reality that Damian could end their friendship kept her up at night. They had been friends for so long.

"I wouldn't,"

Y/N's eyes widened at Rhea. Behind her stood the one and only Damian Priest. The very man that had her heart in the palm of his hand. How long had he been here? Did Rhea know. Her questions would be answered shortly.

"You'll thank me later," Rhea told her and scurried away from the living room.

"I... I meant another Damian," Y/N lied. She couldn't believe her best friend would do this. Sure, she was friends with Damian longer, but what ever happened to girl code?

"Really? After lunch with me today you ate with another Damian?" He asked.

"I was still hungry,"

Damian rolled his eyes and sat on the couch next to her. He didn't look at her. Her heart sank at the thought of being rejected. She couldn't believe Rhea set her up like this. The room was painfully quiet until he finally spoke.

"Well, I guess that is a shame cause I had a lunch date with a really cute girl today. She kept flirting with me, but I was too afraid to say anything. I went to my best friend to figure things out, and then you know what happened? That same cute girl came into my friend's house and gave me the courage to say what I've wanted to say for a while,"

Her breath hitched in her throat. "And what's that?"

"That she is the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about at night. She brings out the absolute best in me, and I would be stupid to let her go,"

Tears sprung in Y/N's eyes. "Really?"

Damian cupped her chin in his hand. His thumb rubbed against her flesh softly. He leaned in and kissed her. Their eyes closed as they melted into their kiss. Finally, they pulled away.

"Really, really,"

They talked for the next thirty minutes. Their lips never strayed far from the others. Soft giggles filled the room as they talked about their newfound romance. They were on cloud nine. Nothing could bring them back down to Earth until a familiar Australian accent sounded from the other side of the house.

"I eventually want my living room back!"

[foone]

They changed something with the security model which makes it basically impossible to get consistent keypress injection.

No matter which method you use, if you set the security settings how forums tell you to, if you run it with admin (or not admin), if you do the manifest stuff to give it extra powers, there will always be at least one scenario where your keypress-injection software will just NOT WORK AT ALL. There's nonsense like occasions where you can inject from program A to program B, but not program C, because program C is 32bit and program B is 64bit, and program A can only inject if it's also 32bit. There's things where you can inject if the target application is using the win32 keyboard API but not if it uses directx, or you can't inject into B unless A is running as admin, but running A as admin will break injecting into program C!

They only ways to get reliable keyboard automation on windows are:

Write a kernel driver. This is not easy and will actually cost you money to do, because of the driver security nonsense in 64bit windows

Use hardware keyboards. this is what I do: I have a bent pipe* keyboard which is actually controlled by the computer: some software says "push X" and the keyboard response by pushing that key. The OS doesn't know that it's just doing what the software says, it can't tell it apart from a physical keyboard with actual buttons

Don't run Windows 10/11.

Run a different OS in a virtualization environment and inject into that instead. I've done this a few times: I ran a SNES emulator inside a Linux emulator (on top of Win10) because running the emulator directly made it impossible to programmatically press keys.

BTW, this isn't aimed at you, but I have a massive headache right now and so if anyone wants to reply "oh did you try..." or "what about...", don't. I did try that, I know about that, there's additional complexities here I'm simply not listing because I don't want to go that far into the weeds. Keyboards and UI automation are my career: I do know what I'm talking about.

(this is why I would never in a thousand years post about this on Mastodon. I would be getting replyguys trying to "help" me by suggesting shit I already tried back in 2018 until the sun burnt out)

* This is a communication satellite term, for early satellites that didn't do any active processing/filtering on signals they received, they just amplified them and returned them back to earth, like you're talking into a U-shaped pipe. This bent-pipe keyboard isn't smart, all it does is listen for a signal to press/release a key and then does as asked. The computer is doing all the processing as to when and what keys to press

Wait if I can find the code for my poetry keyboard I could use it to build a forcefem keyboard that switches the pronouns you type to only be she/her

[catcze]

I see you miss writing for his grace wriothesley,

Maybe, you can try with, uh,

you who drop by his office everyday, literally everyday whenever the man is by the fortress?

Bringing lunch and always kiss him wherever, be it by the cheeks, temples, forehead, or lips before leaving him alone again to continue his work?

Making him always anticipated for the short moment of solace, making him looking forward to your kisses—?

Only for you suddenly just stopped kissing him and only drop the lunch box, and left him behind. Earning a sad puppy all alone by the office?

You can ignore/delete this if there's already a similar fic of yours with this prompt 🙌🏻

— anywho, have a great day! 💜

!! This is sooo cute? I can just imagine the sorta shocked/hurt puppy dog look he gets on his face when you skip the kiss one day lol TT

Wriothesley is pouting. The man is honest to archons pouting, and you have no idea why.

Ever since you had returned to the fortress from your daily toil at the palais mermonia, your beloved has been huffy and pouting, only giving you curt answers and all but sulking in his chair when you ask him what's wrong. He's wrapped himself up in his paper work rather than wrapping himself up with you, even going so far as to seclude himself in his office during the usual dinnertime.

"I don't know either," Sigewinne whispers to you as you both have dinner in the cafeteria. "He's been like this for the whole afternoon. When I walked into his office after lunch he was sulking in his chair, looking mopey, when he looked completely fine this morning."

The melusine's words scratch a part of your brain, the one that tells you that you forgot something today, but that you're not entirely sure what it is. You wouldn't be surprised if you did, honestly— the palais was jam-packed with things that needed doing, papers that needed moving, and people that needed talking to. In the hustle and bustle of today, it's inevitable for you to miss something.

it all comes to a head after dinner, when you're relaxing in your and Wriothesley's shared quarters. It's late in the evening at this point, and you're already relaxed in the warm bed, a book in your hand as you wait for Wriothesley's sulking to crack and for him to eventually come and tell you what's got him in such a funk.

And it doesn't take long, either— soon enough, the door to your quarters opens and shuts quietly, and your beloved is standing by the bedside, looming over you, still with that pouty expression that, too anyone else, might seem out of character.

He doesn't say anything at first, and neither do you. Instead, you bookmark the last page you were on and set it on your side table before pulling off the blanket and opening your arms— a clear invitation. One that Wriothesley takes immediately, all but dropping into your hold and wrapping his arms around you. He buries his face in your neck, his heavy weight pressing down on your person and pinning you to the bed, but you can't be bothered to really care about that.

With one hand running through his hair, petting him while he holds you, you ask— "Something happen?"

Wriothesley huffs a breath to your neck and the warm air dances on your skin. You can feel his cheeks warm in embarrassment, maybe, as he mumbles something incomprehensible.

"Hm?"

He does it again, and you tug on his hair in retribution, drawing him away from the crook of your neck enough that you hear what he says.

"...didn't kiss me during lunch," the fearsome duke mumbles, refusing to meet your eyes, scowling with embarrassment at his own childish admission.

You blink, turning the words over in your mind as you try to recall the events of today's lunch and— yeah. He's right. Your brain had been so muddled up with things you had to get done once you returned to the palais that you had left his office in a flurry after dropping his lunch off at his desk.

At the realization that that was why he had been pouting and sulky the whole day, you can't help but giggle.

Wriothesley, in turn, scowls at you, even as the flush on his cheeks darken considerably at the admission.

"Oh, I'm sorry my love," you coo once your giggles die down, your cheeks hurting from smiling at how sweet and funny and needy this big scary warden of yours is. "Let me make it up to you, hm?"

Wriothesley is still pouting as your hands weave in his hair and you tug him down, but the expression is quickly wiped off of his face as you make up for lunchtime— you pepper kisses on his forehead, his nose, his temples, his cheeks. Your lips seek out every inch of his face, layering it gently in your amused, endeared affections.

It's only when Wriothesley is smiling softly, melting bonelessly into your embrace and all but humming as you kiss him that you stop, pulling away to grin at him.

"There. I think my debt has been repaid, no?"

[moriitis]

Hey! Happy holidays, moriitis!

This is an unusual curiosity, but... What do you think about Toby being a father?

I feel like he wouldn't like having a child, or maybe he would, I don't know... do you think he would be a good father? (Let's suppose that hypothetically you have a daughter)

Have a nice Christmas, I love you! 💗

Father!Toby Rogers HeadCanons. Fem!Reader.

FIRST, I wanna say how fucking weird it was reading this ask at 5 am because I shit you not, before I went to sleep THIS VERY THOUGHT crossed my mind and I told myself I was gonna write this today. GET OUT OF MY HEAD. No, on a real note, glad we are on the same wave length. I LOVE THIS and thank you for requesting it! Have the most happiest of holidays yourself! <3 AND NO I LOVE YOU.

Content/Warnings; abortion, mentions of miscarriages, blood, birth, children, babies.

If you had asked him what he did on a specific Wednesday two weeks ago, he'd have no idea. That was one of the downsides to being a proxy; the memory loss and foggy mind. But fuck, did he remember the morning you told him you were pregnant. His heart fell through his ass, his skin colour turning fifty shades paler than usual.

Admittedly, his first reaction was to laugh. He'd snort in your face and narrow his eyes suspiciously toward you.

"Weird fucking thing to say."

Would be one of the first things he would say. Because you pranked him so often that he simply didn't believe you and it was such a weird fucking thing to say? What a weird prank?

But when you didn't laugh, his lips pursed nervously and he shifted from one foot to the other. The silence was louder than anything as you both stared at each other. The seriousness on your face, this was going too far.

"You're on birth control... right?"

And before he knew it, you were tearing up and right there and then he wanted a hole to swallow him up and eat him. This was bad, no, worse than bad; this was really fucking serious.

Slender would fucking kill him, he'd kill him first and then kill you. This wasn't supposed to happen, shit, he shouldn't have been fucking with you in the first place and now you were fucking pregnant?!

He wanted to panic, he wanted to dart out the door and leave forever but he was tied to Slender. Not just as a proxy, but a slave; a mere worker.

It was the look on your face too, he couldn't leave you? What kind of man were he? Not that he had a particularly good role model for what being a man was like

God forbid he turned into that man.

"Okay."

He would start -

"Okay, okay, ooookay."

He was reassuring himself more than he were reassuring you and his hands reached out to grip firmly on your shoulders. This didn't have to happen, he could.. well, you could fall down some stairs or better yet, drink some alcohol? That'll get rid of a baby, right?

Those thoughts, those dirty, putrid thoughts. What was he thinking? He was disgusted in himself but he couldn't help it, he was panicking.

He couldn't be a father, he was not made to be a father. What if he turned into him? What if he were to.. god forbid it, lay his hands on the babe? He was a dangerous individual, why should the softness of a baby stop him?

Perhaps it was because it were.. his baby. A life growing inside of... you.

"I can't do it."

He admitted.

"I am not fit to be- I CANNOT be- Our life- What we do- No, no, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I love you but-"

He was rambling. He was afraid, he couldn't bare to look at you because what if he were to suddenly lay a hand on you?

Sitting down with Toby and talking to him was the best option. To clear your minds, to form a plan - to figure out what to do and whether you both wanted this baby.

Toby was honest, so brutally honest that frankly it made you burst into tears.

"It's not that I don't want it- it's that I-.. I can't."

His words hurt so much but he promised he'd be there to help you each step of the way. Fuck, he'd even get Jack in an attempt to try and help with the termination.

But word travelled fast and it sure travelled quick.

Slender's rage was not shouting or screaming; it was the eerie silence or disappointing faceless stare he would give you. It was the nausea that followed, the anxiety that riddled itself in your blood stream.

And just like that, Toby's whole life was gone. You had just.. simply disappeared. And it killed him, the unknowing of what happened to you. It killed him to think that he could've possibly killed you.

But you were not dead. Slender had come to an... agreement.

You were to stay a proxy but you were to terminate the child and with that, he sent you on the other side of the forest. In a cabin, alone and to deal with your emotions.

Jack had came to aid you with the termination.

But something inside of you told you that.. you wanted this child. That perhaps this child was a chance of hope, of normality. That maybe you could escape.

And you hated to bare such a burden on a child that was not yet born.

It took a lot of convincing from Jack, a lot of persuasion to keep the baby and to do regular visits to ensure it was growing healthy. You were to birth the baby alone, for Jack couldn't risk getting caught. But he taught you well, how to handle it and of course gave you lots of books.

It was risky, going against Slender. He would know something was up, especially since you had not come back as quickly as he had expected.

So Jack lied for you, he hated it but did it nevertheless. What was he going to lose?

He told Slender you were in a coma and that he needed to do regular checks to ensure you were alive.

Slender wouldn't know, fuck, Slender wasn't human - so the lie worked perfectly.

The pregnancy was rough. Unwelcoming. You vomited everything up, you were unable to gather firewood due to the fatigue - so on most nights you would be freezing alone.

A part of you didn't expect the baby to survive. That you would miscarriage.

But weeks slogged into months and you were bursting.

And you had to do this alone.

You didn't count how long you were in labour for, but it felt like for days.

So much blood, that something was wrong and you just knew it.

But you pushed through, with each book Jack had given you being an aid.

The baby was born during the night.

And she did not cry. Nor weep, nor whine.

Your heart dropped.

You were slumped on the cabin floor, blood pooling around your thighs and knees as you doubled over. There, on the towels beneath you, were the child. Pale, small.

If it weren't for the shock, you would've moved instantly. But you couldn't. All you could do was watch in disbelief, your head glazed in sweat.

But motherly instincts kicked in quick.

And you reached for the scissors, cutting the cord and making haste to save your daughters life.

Your daughter. A girl. You had no idea what the gender were but it were evident as you helplessly rubbed the babes back, hoping to clear some airways to hear that cry.

Relief washed over you, a cry that would've seen irritating for some; music to your ears.

You had a daughter - she was alive!

It took Jack a couple months until he passed by again, he was on his rounds locally and knew he needed to check up on you. A part of him expected to find you dead and half of him prepared himself to the smell of death as he itched closer toward the cabin. The smell of the rotting corpse either being you, the child or both.

But there was a new smell. A sweeter smell.

He wasn't sure why he was surprised when he discovered the cooing child in your arms but he were.

You had named her Lyla.

And you ached for Toby.

Jack couldn't vouch for the coma lie anymore and he knew that soon you were to be caught.

So, he did what he thought were best. He dragged Toby's sorry ass here. And it took a lot of convincing.

Toby succumbing to depression at the idea of losing you. Spending most days in bed, grieving.

So, when he walked into the cabin, he quite literally dropped to his knees, it was like everything inside him had been healed.

"You're alive-?!" Toby choked out. A part of him believed he were dreaming. His eyes scanned every fibre of your being, your hair, eyes, lips and.. the baby in your arms. His mouth hung agape and you couldn't help the stream of tears that came flooding down your cheeks. The brunette couldn't lie, he couldn't say that you looked well because you didn't. You looked.. so hungry, so weak and yet this beautiful child looked so healthy. "You- is that- am I?" All you could do was nod to his words as you approached him, Toby barely able to find the courage to look at the child in your arms. No, he had to make sure you were real first. His hand reached out, fingertips barely grazing over your cheekbones and there he smashed his lips against your own.

It took a lot of explaining and Toby was.. well, in shock for an hour or two as he tried to come to terms with it all. The idea that you did this.. alone. That you carried this child alone for months, that you gave birth alone. He should've been there, he would've been in a heartbeat!

But that voice in the back of his head reminded him of the words he spoke to you on the day that you announced you were pregnant. Oh, how they were not true.

Because as soon as he glanced at the baby, he knew in that moment that he wanted to be.. a father. Well, he wanted to try.

"She's beautiful.." he whispered, voice hoarse as he fought back the lump in his throat. Toby reached out but stopped himself. What if even a mere touch would make the baby disappear? What if.. somehow, he hurt her?! His expression pained as he hesitated, between wanting to love but being too afraid to do so. The both of you exchanged glances, your own look encouraging him silently. You trusted Toby, despite his nature, despite what he does; you knew he would never hurt her. And you relayed those very thoughts with a look alone as you gently urged the little bundle toward him. Toby wanted to decline but slowly, he took the baby within his own arms. He was awkward, freezing and sitting as still as he could, like she were made out of glass. It made you laugh. "You're not going to hurt her," you reassured with words this time. "But what if the day comes that I do?"

When Toby found out his daughters name were Lyla, he broke down into tears. He was crying so much that he kept calling himself 'such a little bitch' between each sob.

It was pretty funny.

But you didn't laugh, you just rubbed his shoulder reassuringly as he sobbed tears over his daughter.

Which prompted Lyla to whine softly.

And then Toby cried more because he thought he hurt her. Shit, this man was more hormonal than you were.

It took Toby many weeks to adjust to this new lifestyle and he tried his best to form a bond with his daughter. You had the pleasure of nine months to form a bond, Toby had no time to prepare at all.

But it was hard because every time he looked at her, his heart broke into a million tiny pieces.

She was too perfect, too beautiful and anxiety consumed him at the thought of losing her. He had just got you back!

And you were the two girls in his life he loved ever so dearly.

So, he insisted that he looked after her more. Despite the fact that every time he held her, he wanted to fucking die. He was too damn anxious for this shit.

Admittedly, as weeks turned into months, you were thankful for Toby's willingness to parent more often.

But it was hard at the start

It seemed Lyla hated Toby and it frustrated Toby each time she would cry whenever she were in his arms

She was clingy, and you understood both of their emotions.

So when Lyla was asleep, Toby would feel his emotions get the better of him too. He would be angry, but his anger turned more into sadness as he stormed off into the wilderness for some alone time.

And this happened often. Toby needed time and you understood this, a part of you feeling guilty for thrusting this parent role upon him so suddenly - especially after he expressed his discomfort with the idea of being a father.

But it was still early days.

And you were unsure on what happened that particular night but when Toby came back from his usual walks, he was a different man.

And when he gently scooped Lyla up into his arms, it seemed she noticed that too.

Perhaps it was the confidence? Or how calm he appeared?

Whatever it was, it seemed now they were inseparable.

The love in his gaze as he rocked Lyla gently in his arms, like he was holding his entire world and nothing was going to take that away from him.

Well, that was until Slender found out.

And it turned into a literal shit show.

The way Jack came storming into the cabin, bursting your little bubble you had created, your idea of a happy, normal family disappearing as quickly as you had dreamt it.

The panic on Toby's face as he knew.

And you knew.

You expected worse, but Slender was... forgiving.

You were unsure what was said, whether Jack had swayed his mind or perhaps if Toby promised some unspoken promise.

But the cabin you had given birth in was to become your home.

On one condition.

You were banished. No, you would not go back to society - especially not after the things you know and had seen, but you were to stay here until your death. Which would not be a peaceful death, but that day would come. For now, Lyla was fine and despite your worry about her future; Slender agreed that she would be fine.

You did not trust the entity's words. But you were thankful nevertheless.

"How the hell did you get so big?!" You heard Toby yell from the living room, Lyla's giggles followed. From the corner of your eye, Toby spun her around in the space of the living room. There was no denying that the scene warmed your heart, but also made you chew the bottom of your lip anxiously.

Toby always said that you worried about her too much and maybe you did, but fucking hell... if her ankle caught the table or her head on the wall! Rushing over, you quickly waved your arms out. "Whoaa, okay, hold on- she's gonna hurt herself or get sick-!" you quickly spoke, trying to pitch your voice a little louder than Lyla's giggles. Toby stopped momentarily, Lyla in his arms and he looked at you with a questioning look. "She's fine, see?" Toby held her out and she flopped in his arms, almost looking as if she were about to drop on the floor and instinctively you threw your hands out to catch her. The brunette could only chuckle as he bundled her up close to his chest. "You worry too much." Those same words again and you rolled your eyes, a soft crinkle of irritation evident in your brow. Lyla was.. fine and perhaps you did worry too much, but Toby didn't really understand the concept of.. gentle playing. Like the times he'd throw her in the air, it make you wanna vomit at the idea of her hitting her head on the roof, or god forbid - he drops her. She was too little for this roughness and deep down, she'd always be your little baby. But Lyla was nearly two and it broke your heart to admit that, as much as you enjoy watching her grow.

And she preferred playing with Toby than with you. Mostly because she was a carbon copy of Toby himself. From the nose to the hair colour. She had your eyes though, so screw you Toby.

Toby became the very man he promised himself he would become, the very father he wished he had himself.

Loving and caring. Lyla was most certainly Daddy's little girl and Toby wore that badge with pride.

If it weren't for the circumstances and for the fact that Toby does not own a wallet he'd have little pictures of his daughter nestled away inside the pocket of his wallet.

Despite the bumpy start, Lyla couldn't get enough of Toby and he ensured that every night he'd read her a bedtime story. He'd even fall asleep himself sometimes just beside her bed, other nights just wanting to sit close in case something were to happen.

Admittedly, a part of you worried that Toby was.. too attached to her.

But whenever they were together, Toby was healing something inside of him that he thought could never be healed.

And essentially, he was living a childhood he had always wished for through his own daughter.

Eventually, Lyla blossomed into a teenager and it was.... hell.

"I fucking hate this cabin, I hate being here! Why can't we be normal! What's with all this off the grid shit!" The voice yelled from down the hall. Oh, she wasn't wrong, Lyla had every right to be pissed but having to live with an angsty teenager that hated everyone and everything was a lot worse.

And Toby never, NEVER, did the punishments.

Just... strict words.

No, he couldn't trust himself, so let you deal with it.

But at times he would find himself taking Lyla outside for a walk to talk to her. To let her know that he was there if she wanted to talk.

And yes, Toby does 100% sneak her out to go to the nearest town.

All in all, Toby would be, against all odds, the best father he could offer. Though I do see him not wanting kids at all. I also HC that all the proxies are infertile anyway.

But if it were to play out, it'd probably be something like this. Toby would be the cool dad where you could just about get away with some stuff. Toby would also be one of those guys where he claims he hates the cat kid and then forms such a close bond with the cat kid.

Oh, and is this man protective of his children too. !

Very much refers to his children as 'sperm pet.' Or he pulls a Kratos and he's kinda like 'get 'ere, boy/girl.'

I RAMBLED TOO MUCH

I feel like I didn't really answer your question

I'm sorry. I will write more about this in the future though.

[lafortezaboy]

I'd like to request a little bit of angst if you're comfortable writing something like this!

Could I request Sophia, Daniela and/or Manon finding out that reader was in some accident that sent them to the hospital, before or after they go on stage, and then rushing to go see them

of course angel! i chose sophia for this because it felt like a prompt meant for her, but i honestly feel like they'd all react fairly similarly and rush to the reader's side.

triggers / warnings: car accidents, hospitals, mentions of light blood / injury, jokes about the car crash you were just in, a suggestive joke made at the end

there had been only a little bit of annoyance festering inside of sophia, as she scanned the front row and didn't find you. this show wasn't a big one, but between traveling and your own busy schedule, it had been the first you were able to attend. the disappointment of you missing it – of you forgetting, or getting distracted by something else, it caused her to feel alone, unimportant. things you had never made her feel before.

it was only when she was finally off stage that she was able to find out the truth. she and your mom had bonded quickly, especially with her being so far from her own and your mom welcoming her into the family upon meeting her. it wasn't uncommon for your mom to call her, but the multiple missed calls clued sophia in quickly that something was wrong. she read the text your mom had sent her, and the second she read it, she felt the blood in her veins run cold.

hi sweetie, y/n was in a car accident. they asked me to let you know, their phone was damaged in the accident.

the follow up text with the name hospital you were in was all sophia needed to rush out, but the girls saw how quickly her mood had shifted, and manon had been the one to get sophia to calm down long enough to explain. worry immediately filled them all, but they remained as calm as they could for sophia, knowing panicking would only make her panic more. she changed out of her performance attire quickly, and hopped in the car with megan, knowing she'd get her there the fastest. a quick text was sent to your mom, saying that sophia was on her way.

as soon as she stepped into the lobby, she spotted your mom waiting for her. the two of them met halfway, your mom taking her hand and leading her through the hospital to get to your room. as soon as the two of them stepped into your room, sophia felt that annoyance she had felt quickly turn into guilt.

tears welled in her eyes at the sight of you – little cuts and bruises littered across your face, one arm bandaged and in a sling, small specks of blood dotted around your shirt. what caught her eyes the most was the stitches that went across your cheek. noticing her eyes taking in the sight of you, you gave a tired smile, holding your hand out to her. "it's okay, baby."

your words were her breaking point, and almost immediately she was knelt beside your bed, arms wrapping around you as gently as she could, face buried in your neck as she let her tears fall. your uninjured arm wrapped around her, hand coming up to stroke her hair as you let her cry. at the sight of you two, your mom silently stepped out of the room, giving you some privacy as sophia sobbed into your neck.

"i'm so sorry," she spoke in between gasps for breath, and you frowned then, hand stilling in her hair. maybe it was just the fact that your head still hurt, but you couldn't understand what she could be apologizing for. "why, soph? it's not like you're the one who hit me."

she pulled back enough to look at you, but she avoided your eyes, hands picking at a loose thread on her shirt. you noticed it was one of yours, an old band shirt she had to have dug out of your closet, and the sight made you smile. but she was clearly upset, and you didn't focus on that long. gently, your fingers took her chin in them, and you lifted her face up to meet your eyes. "baby, talk to me? what's wrong?"

she let out a shaky breath, but didn't look away completely and you took that as a good sign. "well i . . . when you didn't show up, i thought that . . . that maybe you missed the show on purpose. i was – baby i was upset with you, and you got hurt on the way to my show. if you just stayed home, you wouldn't even be here." it took a second for the words to sink in, but as soon as they did, your hand moved, cupping her cheek as you met her eyes again.

"hey, you didn't know. there's no way you could've known until after you were off stage, you know that," you said, thumb stroking over her cheek gently. her hand came up to cover yours, and after a moment she pulled it down, letting her lips press against the back of your hand. "you don't have anything to be sorry for, you didn't know, and this wasn't your fault. someone would've gotten hit at that stop sign, no matter what. it just happened to be me because i got bad luck. not because my girlfriend forced me to be on the road."

your reassurances helped some, but the guilt was still there, and sophia knew it would be for a while. and you did too, so you tugged on her hand, trying to get her to join you in the bed. immediately she tried to deny you, but you ignored that, tugging again. begrudgingly almost, she sat beside you, and you sat up a little straighter, moving so you could rest your forehead on her shoulder. "whatever blame you're putting on yourself, i forgive you. and i love you, and i feel like i just got hit by a truck, which i did, so i need cuddles. and maybe you in a nurse outfit thrown in there too."

that got a little laugh out of her, and she pulled back to meet your eyes, hand squeezing yours gently. "this bed's way too small for both of us, and i'm not making any promises on the nurse outfit," she said. "but how about we get you home, and i'll give you all the cuddles you want?"

[creatingblackcharacters]

Hello! Sending it here again:

I play an mmo game which recently had a big character model update, it's still not perfect but we're getting there! They're sharing behind the scenes work on curly hairstyles, for example, which just... weren't there for the longest time. Oh the beauty of scandinavian white-centering... (sarcasm)

anyway, I'm from eastern-central Europe, I play on eastern Europe servers. Seeing someone with a character that's not white is... pretty rare, honestly. So rare that when I do see someone using a character that's clearly meant to be a POC, they're very often roleplaying. Recently I saw a player whom I know for a fact is white, as I know them irl (we're not friends, don't even talk much but I know what they look like) and their character used to be white too before the big update.

So my question is, does that count as digital blackface, and what even is the consensus on digital blackface as a whole? I used to be in a facebook group about unlearning racism (used to because it got deleted after some admin drama, I think? If anyone knows a similar group, let me know please) and there, most Black members agreed that if someone is white, they shouldn't be using Black emojis for example (the topic of mmos never came up, I think). I don't remember the exact reasoning but I think it was the same explanation as actual blackface. But then there were some Black people saying it's going too far and we should be focusing on "actual issues" instead. I know that's to be expected, I'm trans and I know all too well that a community is not a monolith. But seeing the player reminded me that I don't actually know that much about it, and I've seen you educate people before. I hope it's okay that I'm asking you, I'd love to do some further research as well though (I love learning things, I just also don't yet trust myself to find actually good sources).

I hope this ask makes sense, english is not my first language and all. So if I wrote something wrong, please assume I meant well, as I still don't know how to word things properly in english sometimes.

Thank you for doing what you do, btw. I really appreciate having someone compile everything like you do here, it's one of my favorite creative blogs on here.

Okay so I sat on this one for a minute to make sure my answer wouldn't change.

1) there is no one consensus. White people don't agree on everything, neither do we 😅. This would just be my opinion.

2) I definitely don't think you should be using Black emojis if you're a white person, no. That's overt Blackfacing. DEFINITELY don't pretend to be Black if you aren't!!

3) for me, I think designing your characters as Black for online play can be okay in theory, as long as you're coming at it respectfully. Like, I'd have to trust that you actually wanted to learn how to play as someone that didn't look like you, that you actually cared about Black character features and presence in games as a whole. Especially on a game where you get to design the character, versus when you're forced to play as a Black person. It's hard to trust the intentions of white people online, especially when far more often than not the good intent is just... Not there 😅. So for me, if someone asks you why you designed your character, be ready to answer, answer truthfully and answer well! If you're playing as a Black character design because "big tough guy" or "big dommy mommy" yeah you're just digital Blackfacing amongst other racist issues. But if you actually have good intent, and are willing to learn, then you'll be able to stand on that when confronted.

And again- that's just my opinion! I would listen to other voices on it as well.

[estellardreams]

"You've changed..."

[Continuation of this mini fic]

(Prince MK belongs to @purble-turble. Genuinely I just came up with the name for this mini dark lotusnoodles spinoff AU so uh yeah)

It was... Rough, to say the least. Being forced to stay in a rather small cell while awaiting trial.

There was a small pulse on the wall before a ring of golden energy pushed back the wall to an open door.

Mk stood on the other side, still carrying Lán in his arms.

He paused, looking between everyone. He quietly shuffled back, trying to keep his distance.

Wukong got to his feet, putting his hand up to the ring.

"Hey... Kiddo. You okay?" he softly asked.

Lán looked between him and her baba, then back at him.

"Baba isn't normally allowed to speak to you all without papa's supervision."

"What?! Why?!" Mei exclaimed, getting to her feet.

Wukong frowned. "Nezha... He's the one who told her that, huh?"

Lán blinked, her once innocent expression shifting to a more darkened gaze. "Now I see why papa warned me about you all..."

She climbed out of MK's hold, walking up to the ring. Despite being a young nine year old, she oddly had an intimidating aura around her.

"You're all trying to endanger my baba again! He's safer here than with any of you because in trying to rescue him, you're just gonna let him get caught by that Demon King Red like all those other times!" she snapped.

Wukong froze. "Kid, it's not like that I promise!"

"Then how come baba is still here if you and the king aren't here?"

... Okay, he couldn't quite argue with her logic- No that's what Nezha wants.

Wukong shook his head, kneeling down to Lán. "This might be hard to explain, but I'm your baba's mentor. I want to protect him just as much as you and your papa do."

"Then why couldn't you?"

"I... I didn't see the signs. And I'm so sorry I put you in danger like that." his gaze shifted back up to MK.

MK's turned away, trying to not look at his friends and family.

It hurt too much.

It hurt that he couldn't talk to them.

Couldn't... Say anything.

He so badly wanted to tell them.

Just... Everything.

But of course, especially here, he couldn't say a word.

"... I'm sorry I can't talk to you all. Lán, let's go." MK took Lán's hand and began to lead her away.

"Baba? Where are we going?" she asked.

"How about you go play with your friends?"

"Okay! Race ya!" she immediately bolted.

MK waited until she turned the corner before rushing back to the cell ring.

"I don't have much time before I gotta get back to her, okay?" he whispered, a bit panicked.

"Yeah yeah yeah, it's fine. MK, how are you holding up?" Wukong asked.

"Ehh. Could be doing better. This stupid flower pin is keeping me from leaving this realm. And no, I can't take it out."

He growled. "Of course. It's a less threatening and harmful version of restraints that king red would've usually gone for but it still keeps you here."

"Yeah."

"Okay but what's the deal with the KID?!"

"Lán's... A kid Nezha made without my knowledge using his and my own DNA into a pearl stone."

"How long had it been for you? I'm so sorry we couldn't come sooner we really wanted to but the barriers between the Mortal Realm and Celestial Realm were really powerful."

"Ah, that explains it. And yes, it's been almost nine years for me."

"Shoot. Six months for us, nine years for him. Oh, what are we gonna do?" Mei began to slip into a panic.

"Mei, I promise it's gonna be okay. All of you just hang in there, okay? Maybe I can... Hopefully get you all a lighter sentence or something?"

"I... Don't think they'd take your word over the lotus prince." Tang said.

"Oh, right..." MK frowned, moving his hands back to his sides.

"What's with the weird outfit, anyway?" Mei asked.

"The... Gown? That's, uh... A choice. Honestly I just wanted something not traditional and extremely red that King Red would've put me in so..."

"That... Makes sense? I guess?"

MK flinched, hearing footsteps from the far end of the hall.

"I need to go, I'm so sorry. Bye!" he quickly shut off the ring and made a run for it, catching right back up to Lán.

Unfortunately MK wasn't allowed in the courtroom.

Nezha and Li Jing were there, making sure things went smoothly along the nine kings.

"And to read out our sentence..." the third king spoke, holding up the scroll.

"Sun Wukong, Long Xiaojiao, Sha Wujing, Zhu Bajie, and Tang Sazang have been deemed... Guilty. Over trespassing, attacking the heavenly army, and attempted kidnapping of the lotus prince's fiance. The Lotus Prince himself will bring about your worthy punishment."

Nezha got up from his seat, drifting down in front of the five calmly.

"Father. I wish to punish them with the Pagoda. To ensure they are never a threat to Heaven again." he said.

"Very well, then." Li Jing drifted down and activated the pagoda. The celestial guards keeping watch in the court forced the five to be sucked in before it shut off.

"It is done... All of you are dismissed." Nezha ordered.

"But what of your fiancé? Is he alright after such attacks?" Li Jing asked.

"Yes, of course. I've been keeping watch over him and he didn't get hurt."

"That's good."

"Now I'm gonna go back to him and our daughter! Goodbye, father."

"Goodbye, son."

Nezha flew off, finding MK watching over Lán, whom was playing with other children in the realm.

"Hey, MK." Nezha sat down next to him.

He quietly leaned onto him. "Don't worry about your friends. No harm came to them, I made sure of it."

"Oh thank the great sage, thank you..." MK breathed a sigh of relief.

He turned back to the lotus prince. "Can I see them?"

Nezha paused. How was he gonna tell him that he got them locked up in the Pagoda?

"... Not at the moment. I apologize."

"Oh... Then, um... Maybe soon?"

Soon... Nezha would have to find some way to show that they were all still there, somehow. But he could figure that out in time.

"Of course."

MK's gaze shifted back to the children playing around. Nezha leaned onto his shoulder, tugging at him in a hug.

"Love you, MK."

Mk didn't say anything. But deep in Nezha's heart, he was silently saying it right back to him.

And that made him feel so much better.

[nomoreusername]

A Perfect Pair

Pairing:Minho x female reader

Summary:Even though all he wants is you, Minho realizes how much trust rumors can hold.

“You two have so much in common.”

It was a phrase you heard far too often. It was one you rolled your eyes at every time too. You and Minho? Seriously?

His arms crossed over his chest, a flash of jealousy shining in them before just vanishing, being replaced with a deep sadness. Because he already knew what came next.

“It’s not like that,”You insisted, staring at the ground to hide your smile.

A/K was your perfect match. You both worked the same job, seemed to like most of the same things, had the same beliefs, the same humor, the same everything. You two were like puzzle pieces that were made to be.

Minho wanted to scream. He wanted to point out that it puzzle pieces are the same shape they have no chance of fitting. He wouldn't to tell everyone it wasn't fair.

He didn't. He sat there, staring down at his drink. Needing it, he chugged the rest of it down, a sour expression on his face.

“Oh come on. You’d be so cute together. Right, Minho?”

Minho was sure the universe wanted him dead. While he knew the reason was that he was closest, it seemed like taunting. Surely it was a cruel, cruel joke.

“Yeah. They’d go alright together,”He shrugged. Your face flushed as you met A/K’s. He was biting his lip to hold back his smile too, both your eyes gaining this glint that twisted his stomach in knots.

Thomas and Newt exchanged a worried glance before looking at Minho. His face was neutral, no sign of his heart breaking in his chest.

“You two will be together one day for sure. The perfect boyfriend and girlfriend.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m heading to bed,”You siged, rolling your eyes and standing up, brushing off your pants.

“Oh come on. It's early,”Fry complained.

“Yeah. And I already want away from you shanks,”You said simply, walking off.

Minho stood, calmly making his way to his hammock. He glared at the ground as though it spit on him. Something it was so hard not to do the more he heard those words.

Thomas and Newt also left without a word, their concern only growing. Jogging over, they caught up with him not too far away.

“Minho, wait a second,”Thomas called, placing a hand on his chest as he caught up. Minho resisted the urge to shout at them to leave them alone as he sharply asked what they needed, clearly just wanting to get to the point.

“It's just we've been thinking, and it doesn't have to make sense, right?”

“What are you talking about?”He asked, sure they were the ones speaking gibberish.

“Y/N smiles when someone teases her, but that doesn't mean it's true. People smile all the time when they're embarrassed,”Newt pointed out.

A hint of skeptical shown, his interest clearly peaked.

“They're not together. So what if it's that?”Thomas continued.

A trickle is disappoint when through him, along with fear.

“What if that doesn't mean anything?”He whispered.

“What if it means everything? What if you confess and she feels it too?”Newt pushed.

“You really think she could?”

“Only one way to find out. Right?”

Minho didn't say a word as he left the other direction this time. At each step he found a nervous grin crossing his lips as he thought about the possibilities. You could feel the same. You two could be something. You two could be great together.

You two could be the perfect match.

Almost running now, he found himself in front of your hut. Too eager at the thought of his dreams coming true, he didn't think as he swung the door open, ready to proclaim his love.

He was met with a sight that made him sick to his stomach. One that he would never recover from.

You were in A/K’s lap as he sat on your bed, both your lips pressed firmly together. His hands were around your waist, traveling under your shirt, as you kissed with an undeniable passion. You had your arms wrapped around his shoulders, keeping him close.

Of course you and A/K were cute together. Of course you fit so well.

You already are.

You both pulled apart, your faces flushing in embarrassment as he stood there, paling under the moonlight.

“Please don't tell anyone?”

“I’m-I’m sorry.”

His voice cracked as he shut the door. Refusing to let his tears spill, he did his best to swallow the lump in his throat as he wished to just disappear.

He’s so stupid. He’s such an idiot for ever thinking he had a chance.

He never wanted to see you again. The chances of breaking were too likely.

Yet he would see you and A/K tomorrow, whether he liked it or not.

[birchtreecat]

Shattered hearts, Fragmented Worlds

A Live/Dreams AU that will probably never be finished after this. yall asked!!! Archive of Our Own version can be found here. Shoutout to my beta readers Ghost and Ruby :3!!!! _______________________________

Chapter 1- Aki.

She was walking home after school,  no one with her today. Kojika and Nozomi both had after-school classes, and Kichi was too far to visit. So, Aki had opted to treck the streets of eShibuya alone.  Kichi was the one who texted, offering to pop into the SEKAI as opposed to one of them walking to the other's house. Kojika and Nozomi had texted shortly after, saying they'd be there after their relative clubs and classes. Aki sent excited stickers back and texted she'd be home and able to come into the SEKAI soon. The sun was warm, the last of the summer breeze blowing gently through Aki's hair.  The streets were busy per usual, and Aki loved the routine. Seeing different- yet similar people- all live their own lives, separate yet together as the evening began filled her with an inexplicable comfort.  Upon entering her room, the air warm from her blinds being open all day, she closed her door, left a note for her parents that she'd be with friends, and pressed un

                                ti

                                                     tled…….

Cold surrounded her, a sharp contrast from the sunny, cozy air of the venue SEKAI. The triangles cleared from her view, and Aki immediately realized this wasn't the SEKAI she knew. It was the park she used to adore as a kid, familiar. The red slide, the multicolored swings on yellow framing, the chains coated with slightly soft, white plastic, her favourite spot under the fake rock that acted like a ladder to the upper part of the playground. Yet it was eerily empty. The playground was pale, looking like it had been sitting untouched for years, its paint weathered from years of rains and winds. There was none of the familiar scratches and vandalism- not even under the slide. There was no sign that anyone had ever even played on it. The paint wasn't even chipped. It was perfect, yet old all the same. The sky was grey, seeming like a storm was looming, gloomy and heavy.  There was no one there, no movement.  Not even a gentle breeze, the air almost stiff with silence. Part of Aki didn't want to shatter the silence that seemed to coat her once familiar SEKAI. To curl up, or explore the park on her own, timidly and gently. But fear- combined with her uncertainty- overpowered her quiet nostalgia. Now wasn't the time to be hidden. She had to find the others.   

She called out, ignoring the unsettling nerves that drove her heart to her throat and a pit to her stomach.

"Rin?", Her voice hitched a bit, echoing into the near-endless grey sky. But the spunky blonde didn't respond. Usually Rin would be right there, bursting with things to talk about, dragging Aki to whatever new corner she'd found.  According to the group chat and the time on her phone, the others wouldn't be here for a while. Except.. one.

"Kichi? I swear to god, I will choke you if you're playing a prank on me!" She called again, the joking threat an attempt to lighten her nerves. Her voice had a slight shake to it. She could feel the panic rising despite her familiar surroundings. She had to stay calm. Stay rational, that was what matters.  There was no answer, her voice echoing for a few seconds afterwards in the silence.  Aki shifted nervously. "Oliver…?" she cried. She climbed onto the top of the old playstructure, the footholds of the plastic rock familiar as she boosted herself to the roof on top of the slide. "Luka?" Her call became a bit worried now, pitching at the end. Her voice echoed back, and she looked around anxiously. 

"Miku?" she yelled, projecting her voice now. Her throat was getting a little pitchy and sore from her yelling. She was trying to keep her tone under control, knowing Rin would tease her if she saw how scared Aki was. She hated how quiet the world seemed, it only made her panic rise faster, threatening to overwhelm her at any moment. Flower would've been here already if she was in this strange world, so Aki opted to save her voice. Realizing she had no response from any of them, Aki sighed as she climbed down, maneuvering a bit more carefully.  It was harder to get down than it was to get up on the structure, and when she bent down to her next hold, her phone slipped out of her pocket, causing her to impulsively reach- and fall, hitting the woodchips, curling into herself in hopes of not breaking her legs. The woodchips dug into her palms, a familiar feeling, but painful all the same. Aki lifted her palms, examining them- they were slightly bloody, scuffed from the rough landing. She had to pull a few splinters, but she'd be okay. Aki reached for her phone carefully, making sure it wasn't cracked. Dusting off the dirt her phone got coated in, she sighed. She could've gotten out of this a lot sooner if she remembered to just hit pause on Untitled. Flipping her phone over, she tapped, not even unlocking her phone. But nothing happened. No triangles, no light- not even a flicker of movement or shift around her. She played and paused it, tried to skip Untitled altogether, even attempting to play her other songs. Nothing worked, and she cursed. She tried to text the group chat, but there was no signal- odd, for a world inside her phone. She put her phone in her front pocket and began to wander around the park's perimeters before seeing movement from the corner of her eye. It came from the woods, the area covered in darkness as the trees covered what little light was visible through the heavy grey clouds above her. 

"Who's there?" Her voice was strong and defensive. She moved closer, cautiously crossing the field and keeping a distance between herself and the woods.  She wasn't ready for a fight, praying whatever moved wasn't aggressive. There was a figure in the woods that surrounded the park, and she froze. Realizing they weren't moving, she tensed a bit. "I won't hurt you if you don't hurt me." The figure emerged, none other than her sister. "Aki?" Ema seemed confused, both at the world and the fact that Aki was there. Her posture was tense,yet Aki didn’t notice, simply happy she wasn’t alone, glad someone familiar was with her now. The silence was getting to her. "Ema!" Relief filled Aki's gaze, immediately relaxing from her tense position. She ran for her, expecting Ema to run back. but Ema stood still. She tackled her in a hug, but Ema seemed to tense and wiggle away from the grasp. The air seemed to become colder, the winds of the storm above them beginning to stir. 

Aki stopped, her voice hesitant now. "Ema? Is something wrong?" "Why do you never change, Aki?" Ema tilted her head, her voice unusually cool. 

Her heart dropped. Aki could feel the panic rising in her, making her body colder, making her mind race. "Wh- what do you mean, Ema? You've seen the music we make- " 

Her voice stammered, fumbling the words as they caught in her throat. 

Ema's stature stayed cold, uninviting. Aki stepped back and she stepped forward. "You know what I mean, Aki. You never changed. You're childish. Impulsive. Selfish."

The words stabbed her like a knife, twisting as her feelings suddenly shattered into pieces. She could hear things coming from the woods, getting closer. From the edge of her vision, it felt as if they were circling her- but when she turned to look, nothing was there. 

The figures finally closed around her, solid and unwavering. Aki was too panicked to see where they came from. Slowly, they took the forms of her friends- Rin, gazing at Aki with a pained look in her eyes. Kojika, her gaze hard and full of disgust. Kichi, looking away in disappointment and hurt. Nozomi, hiding herself in her cardigan whilst she stared, sadness and betrayal in her eyes. Aki backed off, trying to get away as horror filled her thoughts. Logically, they wouldn't say this. Aki knew that. She should know that. Yet, she still shrunk into herself. She wanted to believe that they wouldn't do this to her. That her panic was being irrational, that this wasn't real. But it felt too real. This was what everyone wanted to truly say, wasn't it? That she was annoying, and they only stayed because of pity for her. She spiraled, believing what they said as her loved ones clamoured around her. 

"You only talk when you want to, never when I need you to" Kichi's voice was sharp and charged with anger, biting into Aki. His glare made her look straight to Kojika, the first to have befriended Aki. 

Kojika's gaze only hardened. "I was wrong about you. Why did you do that, Aki?" Kojika's voice was full of disgust like Aki had committed something horrible. Aki didn't know what she meant. 

"What- do what, Koji- I can fix it, I'm sorry-" Aki sobbed, reaching for Kojika just as she turned away. She looked around and locked eyes with Nozomi, usually kind and quiet to her. Hope lit Aki's eyes for a moment. "N..Nozomi..?"

"... They're right, Aki. You're happy, and that's all that matters. We never did." Nozomi accused, her eyes searching Aki's gaze with pity and sadness. Nozomi's thin hair blew in the wind. If not for the situation, Aki would've thought it was pretty. Nozomi was clearly hurt by something. Did Aki do this? Did she hurt them all? What did she do? "Guys- please, I'll fix it- please, I'm sorry, what did I do?" Aki's voice was getting shrill and desperate, tears flowing down her cheeks as she watched all of her friends walk away. She debated chasing them but waited. Hesitated. She turned around, her tears stopping momentarily to see her sister behind her. Ema's gaze was cold and unbothered. Aki was vulnerable. Hopeful. Her sister would make everything better, right?

 "Your friends all agree, Aki. If you care about them, let them go."

There wasn't the usual warmth to Ema's voice. 

Aki's last hope died then and there, the words hitting like a knife to her chest. Her eyes glimmered with tears once more. "So it was my fault…" she murmured, her tears falling gently. It finally began to rain, cold and harsh on Aki's skin. The others walked away, and Aki stood in the field of the park, rain showering down on her. Minutes passed, and it felt like time had stopped.  When she was sure everyone had at least gotten far enough, she let out a scream. Loud and harrowing, almost feral. Triangles stabbed into her heart, shredding and shattering it beyond recognition. Self-blame swirled like the rain in the wind. She screamed and sobbed, shaking. The wind whirled and howled around her, as if joining in her grief. They were right. She only ever hurt people, even with her best intentions. No matter how hard she tried, she always wound up hurting everyone, didn't she? 

The rain continued pouring, and Aki solemnly began to walk back to the playground. She was too tired to be soaking wet. She had to fight the wind that seemed to push her three steps back every time she tried to take one. Finally ducking under the playground and huddling under the plastic rock, she sat and listened to the rain patter against it. watching as the woodchips around her dampened in the rain. She shivered, the cold wind making her dripping clothes feel icy on her skin. The smell of wood and rain mixed in her nose, and the thought of staying forever rooted itself in her mind. She almost gave it the time to form, to convince her. Why face reality and grow up when her childhood was here?

Why bother, when nobody would get hurt if she just let their world go?

Aki began to hiccup, trying her best to calm down and slow her breaths. It was cold, she was wet, and her anxieties were right. Yet, part of her enjoyed the sound of the rain against her ear, and she smiled at the empty, yet comforting feeling blooming inside of her. The feeling of drifting away. Solitude was unfamiliar, but it felt nice. Maybe she could stay like this, even if only for a bit. 

A voice called. Aki flinched, not expecting it. She came back to her senses, finding herself a little warmer but still dripping from the rain. She didn't move, hearing the voice call again as she shifted. Accidentally moving the woodchips in the process, she remained hidden. The voice was tense but familiar. 

Kojika. But that wasn't right. She hated Aki, didn't she? Everyone did. 

Chapter 2- Kichi

He ducked into his room with a half-eaten package of chocolate cookies, crumbs scattering on his rug and hardwood floor. Flopping into the gaming chair under his loft bed and leaning back into it, his phone buzzed with a text that Aki was heading into the SEKAI. He woke his computer up. 

Navigating to the music folder and hitting Untitled, he expected to be met with Oliver's playful grin from the branch of the Venue SEKAI's tree, or Flower's gravely voice as she chased Oliver around. Yet, when the triangles cleared, he gazed around in slight shock, almost immediately hitting pause on Untitled before hesitating as the gears clicked in his head. This was his old room, the space-themed bedsheets and wall decor hitting him with a burst of longing. He hadn't seen this room since he was five, and it took him back to simpler times. Before his mom left and before his dad was overworked beyond belief. Before Aki transferred to a different middle school, then to Miyamasuzaka Girls' Academy. Before it felt like things had fallen apart.

A voice he hadn't heard in almost 8 years called his father down for breakfast. He poked his head out of his room into the hallway. His mother stood at the end of the hall, and a wave of emotion flooded him. His mother was just as Kichi remembered- her thick, dark hair cut into a bob cut, her favorite white apron turned pink when Kichi had thrown his red blankets into the wash with it, the smell of lavender and honey gently floating from her, and her bear-themed slippers, matching the brown in her eyes. 

"Kichi! Get up, little sleepyhead, or I'll have to drag you out!! You still want to go to the zoo, right?" His mother called, not looking into the hallway. Her voice was warm and teasing, something Kichi hadn't heard since he was 7. By god did he miss how comforting it was to him.

He looked at the chalkboard calendar on his door. July 18th, 2015.  His mom had circled the day with a playful drawing of a pudgy, round giraffe. He remembered this- it was the day he got lost at the zoo. The day his mom left. The realization sent a jab of sadness through him.

Kichi sucked in his breath. He had been avoiding this memory for god knows how long, shoving it deep into the back of his mind. There were too many questions that came with her leave, and he had given up on trying to find answers to them long ago. Seeing his mother before him felt so surreal, as if it were a dream. Wait- is this a dream?

He slipped back into his room, shutting his door gently. He was definitely still himself as far as he was aware. He was still tall and felt like he could accidentally stomp down the entire room if he wasn't careful. He still had his school uniform on, and it was definitely the Kamiyama High uniform. Still.. he gave it a shot. Wake up, Kichi. Cmon, Dad's probably made salmon..

No shock awake. He pinched himself, and felt it. He pulled his phone out, and his lockscreen told him it was still 2023- he still had his photos with Oliver and the other Vocaloid in the Venue SEKAI, photos of when Live/Dreams formed earlier in their fall semester. So I haven't traveled back in time. Otherwise, my photos wouldn't be here..

  So what exactly is going on?

He slipped back into his room for a moment, letting himself breathe in the scent of his old room. The little white bedframe still had his old moon lamp balanced on top of the post above his pillow, bathing the room in a cozy, gentle white light. It couldn't be memory, and Kichi figured it couldn't be a dream from the way he could still feel and notice every little detail. He didn't know how his mother or father would react to his grown-self if he was only 6 or 7 in this.. universe? World? He couldn't tell. He tried to text his friends, but he was met with no signal. If he could find Oliver or even Miku, maybe he'd be able to find the others. He knew he could always just pause untitled. Yet, part of him hesitated to do that. This was the last time he had seen his mom. Aki will be okay to wait for me a while longer.. right? 

He finally left his room. Walking down the hall into the kitchen with the tiny dining table and a seat much too small for him now, Kichi faced his mother. 

He gazed into a near identical copy of his own eyes, his mother's crows feet evident around her eyes. 

She didn't miss a beat, kissing him on the cheek before telling him to sit. 

"Kichi, it looks like you've seen a ghost!" His mother teased, light and affectionate. "Did you have a bad dream?"

He sat in shock before hesitantly stammering. 

"M-mom?" Kichi's mind whirled. Why wasn't she surprised? Shouldn't she be scared, or worried? Why hadn't she reacted to him? He was so much older than he was when this day took place. 

"Kichi? Are you okay?" His mother put her hand on his shoulder, looking into his eyes with geneuine concern. 

"I.. you.. you left.. Why aren't you shocked, or worried or something-" Kichi let his feelings out, trying to keep his voice from yelling, his fists from shaking something. His voice hitched. 

"Kichi, what are you talking about?" His mother's voice was warm. So warm. Can I just stay like this? he wondered. Aki.. Rin would be with you… You'll be okay if I stay here for a bit..

And with that, Kichi let himself lay on his mother for the first time since he was 7. His dad was here, too. The monsters of his current life melted away, like they were on the run from the warmth his parents being together brought him. Was it real? He didn't know. If it was, he wouldn't mind living like this. The others would be okay on their own. And with that, Kichi let himself feel the warmth and care he had been yearning for. The real world could wait, if he could stay like this for just a bit longer.

Chapter 3- Kojika

The girl blinked away the warm yellow lights that changed her surroundings. Instead of her middle school language hall, she was now in a seemingly abandoned park. The paint of the playground was faded and worn down. Rain poured down, thunder booming in the distance. She shuddered a bit, the air cold and damp. She was under the pavilion, the steel tables miraculously shiny despite the careless state of the playground. This was arguably much worse than where she came from weather-wise, considering it was sundown and clear skies when she had been teleported to the park. Yet Kojika found herself smiling a bit in relief despite the storm swirling around her. She was okay. It wasn't real. She'd be okay. She tried untitled again, still getting nothing. Her phone still had no service either. She couldn't shake the feeling something- or someone- was also here. She walked around the pavilion, not wanting to get soaked unless she had to. She heard a hiccup, quiet yet pitchy, coming from the worn-down playground, followed by a few woodchips getting kicked out from under the plastic rock. 

"Hello~? Is anyone there?" she called, her voice tense but loud and clear. She didn't want to scare anyone, but she was freaked out herself.

Who- or whats- here with me?

She tried again, unsure if she was loud enough to be heard over the rain. There was no response. The rain still poured down, the ground an entire puddle at this point. Kojika sighed, ensuring her phone would be safe in her schoolbag, before making a straight bolt for it and ducking under the play structure. She almost immediately got drenched.  She stood under the flooring of the play structure, watching the rain for a moment, dripping like a wet cat.  A gentler hiccup sounded, and she jumped, hitting her head on the flooring above her. "..Aki?" Kojika asked, relief and a smile crossing her face as she rubbed her head, a small bump growing already. "Good god, I thought I'd never find you guys. Are 'Chi or Nozo with you?" Kojika asked eagerly, reaching out.  Aki curled away. 

"D.. don't you hate me..?" Her voice was quiet. Barely audible against the rain. Kojika almost thought Aki didn’t say anything, still weary of what just happened to her before finding the park. She didn't know what had happened, but it had evidently left the younger girl shaken. She gently shuffled over to Aki, kneeling as close as she could with Aki under the plastic rock. Kojika put her hand on Aki’s lowered head between her half-up buns, in an attempt to comfort her whilst keeping her distance. 

Kojika and Aki stayed like that for a moment, listening to the rain as it kept pouring, both of them now having the only dry spot in the park.  “… I don’t know what you went through, or what you saw, Aki. I don’t even know what’s going on now.. but if it’s anything like what I just went through.." Kojika's voice was gentle, going quiet as the memories of what she'd seen before finding Aki flooded her. 

The way her old friends ignored her so suddenly. The way she had fought for them, time and time again, only to be met with a cold shoulder. The warmth leaving the group, leaving her to watch when her favourite people pretended she didn't exist anymore. 

But now wasn't the time to think about that. She couldn't think about them, now, otherwise she'd be a wreck once again. 

".. I'm here for you, okay..?" she finished. Almost a murmur, as she felt her heart drop. Part of Kojika wanted to run. To get far away, and never contact the others again. She knew she had an issue with leaving people in the dust. The guilt would consume her for a few weeks, and she'd move on, burning any memory of those she had gotten close with in the process. 

But Live/Dreams was different. They always had been. She can't do that to them.

Aki lifted her head, her eyes uncertain and fearful.  Kojika smiled softly, before getting out from under the plastic rock and reaching out her hand to help Aki up. The rain slowed down, and Aki gently took Kojika's hand, wiping the last of her tears off on her pantlegs before getting up. Kojika didn't run into the rain this time, opting to gently lead them to the pavilion she had first found herself in whilst the storm slowed to a gentle drizzle. Using her backpack to cover them once again, Kojika simply gently took Aki's hand, ensuring she wouldn't lose her on the way to the pavilion. With how weird things have been, she wouldn't be surprised if they got separated in some way if they didn't hold hands. Kojika sat down on one of the steel tables, watching Aki take a seat next to her on one of the attached benches. She noticed the rain had nearly entirely stopped. Aki sniffled. Kojika could tell by the way she was tensed and avoidant that Aki wanted to leave as soon as possible. 

She's going to leave me, isn't she? The thought hit like a bullet. It was never easy to forget them even when Kojika tried to. She had to constantly remind herself as she comforted Aki. She won't leave. She doesn't know. She cares about you even if it might all be an act. She's not going to leave you. The band won't leave you. At least not until they graduate.They won't leaveThey won't leave.

they have to move on one day.

"Hey, Aki? You haven't seen a way out of here, have you?" Kojika asked, her voice gentle and with her usual, light and casual tone. She actively tried to ignore what she- and Aki- had been through. Seems like they'd both had some tough shit tonight. 

Aki snapped out of her distant gaze, jumping a bit before shaking her head. "Ah- uhm. I haven't found a way out, yet. It feels like I just got here.. how about you? I didn't see you earlier." Her voice was tired. A hint of hesitation crossed her when she asked about Kojika, causing her mind to be flooded again with what happened before.

Nobody actually liked you

You're just forgettable.

You're stupid, thinking we were your friends.

We never wanted you here.

"Actually- there was a glow, different from the rest of what was around me. It looked like one of the triangles we see when we pop in usually?" Kojika thought for a moment after snapping herself out of the quickly moving thought train, brushing it off and praying Aki didn't notice.  "I didn't see any of the vocaloids, but when I went to touch it, I wound up here." Her voice was casual, hoping to whatever Vocaloid god made this sekai that Aki wouldn't press for more. She didn't want to go in-depth, the trauma still relatively fresh on her mind. Best as she tried to hide it, Kojika was still very emotionally shaky from the whole ordeal. Coherent thoughts and a clear mind one moment, the next fighting the urge to ask if Aki truly wanted to be her friend, or if it was all just some game to her. Aki's Aki for fucks sake. She'd never hurt me on purpose. Kojika got lost as she mulled over what else she might've done to get her out of the area. Aki got up and began to wander the pavilion, before pausing at a little triangle floating on the edge of the pavilion. It was green and had an ominous feel to it.

 "Uhm. Kojika? Was this there before?" she asked hesitantly. Her voice was still quiet, and she had to clear her throat to snap Kojika out of her thoughts. Jumping a bit before looking in Aki's direction, Kojika hopped off the table and stood beside Aki. The triangle gently floated, unmoving. She felt her heart tug, a deep longing striking her as if she was chasing something she'd never had in the first place. 

"Was it like this with me, Koji..?" Aki's voice was quiet, her hand on her chest. Aki had been quiet this entire time- a stark contrast from their usual combined chaos and yelling. 

Kojika thought. "Kind of. Yours was sharper and stronger. More.. more desperate. This one feels.. dark, though. Consuming almost." Her tone was thoughtful, and she glanced at Aki reassuringly despite her own nerves. "We'll be okay. If anything, we'll probably find Nozomi or Kichi after.."

Aki nodded, noticeably still shaken. 

Kojika wondered briefly if they should leave without the others.

They'd leave you behind if you didn't find them first

You're only there because you forced them to let you in the band.

You're just clingy and dense.

She shook herself out of her head. They deserve to get out of here, too. They wouldn't leave me behind… They're not like them…. right?

Chapter 4- Nozomi

Nozomi was the last to enter the sekai, archery club taking longer than usual.  She was already slightly worried with nobody answering her texts after they entered it. Aki and Kichi went in around the same time, so she was sure they'd be okay. Kojika, on the other hand, went in alone. Sure, the Venue SEKAI was relatively small and hard to get lost in as long as they stayed behind the courtyard walls, but Nozomi still worried. She knew Kojika liked to explore. Surely she wasn't lost, right? Even then, she would've hit untitled to get back to the real world..  She rubbed the edge of her cardigan sleeve as she opened the door to her aunt's house. She had homework and wasn't even sure if the rest of Live/Dreams were still in the SEKAI, but hit play to Untitled anyway. Just in case. She'd be quick, right?

The familiar triangles faded. She found herself in the presumed green room of the Venue SEKAI- but things were different. Aki's computer and the discs for her voicebank collection weren't there. Nozomi's spare Omnichord carrying case wasn't in the room, either- and neither was Kichi's collection of instruments, or Kojika's favourite microphone stand. It seemed more set up for a dance show, with old pointe shoes and worn toe-guards scattered around the room. A fresh pair of frilled shoes sat before her, as well as a brand-new leotard and tutu set. The shoes were a light sage green and white, the ribbons somehow perfectly cut to her liking. She hadn't danced in years, and yet… could she remember her old routines? The way she leaped and twirled without losing her balance on the very tips of her feet, how she felt like a bird when she practiced alone on a stage. No one to criticize every minuscule thing she did wrong, every misstep or stumble she had. Could she feel like that again?

She looked at herself in the mirror, taking in her appearance. Her hair wasn't in a fancy bun or braid as she'd often done as a child, but she still smiled as she took the costume in. The green complimented her brown hair and sage-green eyes that shined the way they used to under the spotlight. A familiar feeling spread through her- the rush of anticipation before stepping out on stage. She reached for the green room's handle and peeked beyond the door. Instead of finding the familiar cozy, worn-down stage of the Venue SEKAI, Nozomi faced a giant stage and amphitheater. Her last venue. It was something she'd buried deep down, the memory hitting her like a truck now as tears jumped to her eyes. She scanned the empty rows of seats before her eyes, tickets to each on every other armrest. Nobody was there. Not even her parents. And so, with no one to see her, she took a breath and began the memory of her final dance. Her tutu bounced, she leaped and stretched and twirled to an imaginary music track that ran in her mind. It was perfect- like she had never stopped dancing all those years ago. She let her tears flow freely. Nostalgia and yearning mixed with the salty water that dripped onto the stage, splattering as the dance flicked the tears from her cheeks. She felt like she was floating across the stage, leaping higher as the violin and piano built midway through, her gait and posture perfect. Standing on pointe as if she'd never stopped, as if her feet had never spread out to a somewhat-normal position after years of wearing normal shoes. 

As if she were in a dream, she suddenly found herself in the wings of the stage. Her dance teacher announced the ending performance- "Final Duet." An irony, considering it was a solo dance. Her final dance. She peeked from the curtain, scanning the audience one last time. She wiped her tears, and made sure she could breathe. As she was about to close the curtan and step out, she saw one thing. There, in the very front center of the seats were her parents. She sucked her breath in. Her cue sounded.  As she lept into a pirouette, she felt the warmth of the spotlight shine on her.

And she stumbled. She fell flat on her face, her form failing her. The audience gasped, her track continuing. She picked herself up, attempting to catch up with her track before stumbling again. And again. Each time catching more murmurs from the crowd, each time feeling both parents' glares harden. The curtains closed, the song ceasing at the climax, feeling sudden and cut off. She had failed, horribly, despite practicing that routine every night.

She was perfect.

Why did she mess up so badly?

Sure, it had been three years since she danced.

But she did it so flawlessly just before. Not even ten minutes ago, she did it perfectly. She could still see where her tears had fallen onto the stage.

It felt like hours had passed by in minutes. Nozomi was the last to perform, and thus the last to enter and leave the green room. Listening to the gentle bustle of the crowd leaving, she sat until things had almost entirely quieted down. She felt numb. Useless. All the energy and happiness she had felt had dissipated, leaving her empty and cold. What good was she, if she spent all this time and still failed?

 She finally slipped into her grey cardigan, white shirt, black jeans, and ebony-green shoes once again, tears clouding her vision. It had been about 10 minutes, and she knew her parents would be angry if she waited any longer. Tying up her vans, she stepped into the back hall of the concert venue, meeting her parents halfway down. Her mother took her by the hand, her grip firm. Nozomi panicked internally, forgetting how angry her mother was. She simply followed her mother's lead into the car, too on edge to say anything. Silence crackled in the air. Nozomi almost wished her mother would do something, say something. But she didn't.

Her father was asleep already, tired from a long day of work.

Her mother kept her strict gaze on the road, her knuckles white on the wheel. The radio was shut off abruptly at a stoplight as the station took an ad break, leaving Nozomi to stew in the silence. 

Nozomi began to disassociate, getting stuck in her head as her thoughts spiraled. 

You must've not tried hard enough. If you only watched your posture. If you hadn't looked for your parents in the crowd. If you hadn't been focused on your feelings. If only.. If only.. If only…

The drive home seemed to never end. They passed her favourite restaurant, something she was anticipating. It was usually a tradition for them to celebrate her dances after every performance her parents actually attended. They passed the tree nursery, saplings leaning gently to and fro as the gardener gave them water in the early moonlight. Passed her school, the cheers for the football team audible even from the streets, chalk cannons blasting the blue and black colours of school pride. There was still at least an hour of traffic to go through. Her mother began to scold her, her voice harsh and cutting. If Nozomi cried now, her mother would get her father to join in. She couldn't go anywhere. She was trapped by what she wanted most, reminded of why she was taken to her aunt's house for good. Why her parents left her, why she wasn't allowed to visit.

She was a good-for-nothing kid.

And that's all she'll ever be.

[drowning-moonlight]

On the Separation of the Straw Hat Crew during Sabaody Archipelago and its Effect on the Story

So when I first got into One Piece back in July of 2023, I already knew a couple of plot points that were going to happen. I just didn't know exactly when those things would happen and how they affected other plot points down the line.

Some of the things that I knew would happen but didn't know when were: the crew getting separated, the death of Luffy's brother Ace, and a two year time skip.

I knew these things would happen before I started reading the manga, I just did not know at which points in the manga these things would happen. I did not know they happened one right after the other. I did not know how these events all lead into each other.

I did not know that the order of events went: the crew is separated -> thus Luffy is alone at Marineford and isn't strong enough to save Ace -> so he decides to take a two year break from piracy to train and become stronger.

These events all lead into each other in ways that I did not know going into the manga. And that makes these events all the more painful because I thought Luffy would be with his crew when Ace died so that they could comfort him.

Like before reading, I genuinely thought that the crew would have a big group hug or something, to be a shoulder to cry on for Luffy once Ace died. And that! didn't happen! And it HURTS SO MUCH.

The crew is separated by Bartholomew Kuma at Sabaody. This event traumatized Luffy and as a reader, I remember being hit with the knowledge that "oh, yeah, this is the event other fans talk about when referencing the crew being separated." This is probably the lowest point for Luffy so far in the series. Unmatched until Ace's literal death at Marineford. And since I didn't know the order of events when I started reading, I had assumed wrong when I thought that the other Straw Hats would be there to comfort Luffy when Ace died. I was so very wrong.

I will never forget the sinking realization that I had while reading the manga that Luffy would be alone when Ace got killed. And I say "alone" as in he was without the rest of the Straw Hat Crew. I know Jinbei, Iva and the Okamas, Hancock, the Whitebeard pirates, etc were there supporting him but he was alone for all intents and purposes because his crew wasn't there. Not because they didn't want to be there with him of course but because Kuma had forcibly separated them. It turned out that Kuma had good intentions with that but it did still leave Luffy "alone" for the most traumatic moment of his life. I will never forget the dread I felt while reading Impel Down and Marineford proper when I figured out that the crew would not be reuniting any time soon.

Learning that the separation of the crew made Luffy feel weak made it make sense for me why he decided to take a two year break to train. I had wondered what the point of the time-skip was before I had gotten to that point. But it all made sense now.

And it makes Luffy's desperate loneliness at the separation hurt all the more.

Luffy realizes what he still has left. His crew. Even though they were separated. He wants to reunite with them and thinks back to how Ace asked them to take care of him. Luffy knows he's in good hands even though his big brother is dead now. But his crew is far away.

And it all circles back around to them being separated on Sabaody. Separated by Kuma. Who had to become a Warlord because Ace himself had taken out a previous Warlord, leaving a spot open for Kuma to be forced into and later separate the Straw Hats.

This whole sequence of events all lead into each other in ways I could have never predicted.

If Ace had never defeated that previous Warlord, then Kuma might not have ever been made a Warlord to replace him. Then Kuma wouldn't have been there in Sabaody to separate the Straw Hats. Then Luffy wouldn't have been "alone" at Marineford when Ace died. It's all connected.