#This is more like Karmic Justice

[fromtheseventhhell]

When Dany and Arya are the first Targaryen/Stark duo to interact and people start seeing the light on Daenarya >>>>>>

[bonyassfish]

I think I’ve said this before but it would honestly be so funny if someone assassinated Netanyahu and the Rabin family went to the funeral

[soomanymoths]

An apology passed on by Crinkles partner a while back. Posting bcs im not waiting another year for him to own up to his flock how horrendously he treated people. Redacted certain parts bcs im not entertaining excuses and reasoning as to why it was ok to treat his partner and "dear friend" like trash. The stuff i left in (biphobia etc) doesnt realistically make sense and should have never been taken out on me. Even if it did make sense, being nasty to a "friend" as a 30 year old over an oc is pretty goofy. He made his biphobia MY problem and thats inexcusable. He made all of his issues other peoples problems actually. Thats the entire situation imo. This doesnt cover the extent of how terrible crinkle treated people but i dont expect it will ever get better than this and im not waiting anymore

[latchofficial]

awake at 6am. kept awake by getting incredibly frustrated over minecraft steve being in smash again

[byteofsoup]

Rainbow mealworms review: container opened in transit causing mealworms to fall out in the post office. and now i have food poisoning

[snekdood]

ik we talk about "karma" in the sense of "whatever you do will come back to bite you", but in a more realistic sense it just means action. every action has a reaction, etc. which is why its incorrect to blame your god/gods for the way you're mistreated in life bc 1. everyone has free-will and 2. they dont have control over the wheel of karma (at least not in hinduism), so when you're mistreated, you shouldn't ask "what have I done to accrue karma in the form of mistreatment" you should ask "why do these people suck so much", lol. it's not your god/gods punishing you, its other people exercising their free will and choosing to use it in a way that makes them suck as human beings 🤷 dont let people get off the hook by blaming the gods or some sort of nebulous "karma" you cant pin down, blame the people for being pieces of shits, dont let them think they're not actors in this and are just dutifully mistreating you on behalf of the laws of karma, bc they aren't, thats not how karma fucking works.

[cazshmere]

Saturn in the Houses : Where Karma Has Your Back 🪐

materialist🔖

DISCLAIMER: These are just my personal observations and are meant for entertainment purposes only; it may not resonate with everyone due to the nuances of astrology. Please respect my work and avoid copying or stealing it. Enjoy reading!! 🪐

in case of saturn retrograde:

when saturn is retrograde, it still has your back, but the rewards or consequences may come in a more subtle, delayed, or internalized way. retrograde saturn focuses on reworking past karmic lessons, inner transformation, and self-discipline, allowing you to develop resilience, wisdom, and long-term stability. while it might seem like progress is slow, trust that saturn’s guidance is leading to deep, lasting growth.

saturn in the 1st house - saturn in the 1st house ensures that people who criticize your appearance, personality, or self-expression will eventually face karmic repercussions. especially if they’ve disrespected you and made you feel unworthy, unwanted or unattractive. it may take time, but saturn works to build your inner strength, ensuring that you own your identity and command respect. if you feel judged or misunderstood, saturn is quietly working in the background to reward your inner growth and resilience, ensuring that those who mock you face the consequences in the long run.

saturn in the 2nd house - saturn in the 2nd house has your back when it comes to financial stability and self-worth. if anyone belittles your financial status or possessions, the way you make your income, your values, made you doubt your self worth, made fun of your self esteem then saturn ensures that their karma comes full circle, and they may face their own struggles with gaining security, might feel insecure, question their self worth, made you feel bad about how and what you eat, this placement helps you build your resources over time and develop inner confidence about your values and worth, even when others don’t see your efforts. expect saturn to reward you with lasting material stability and personal self-esteem once the karmic balance is restored.

saturn in the 3rd house - with saturn in the 3rd house, saturn helps you master communication and mental clarity. if anyone criticizes the way you express yourself, your neighbourhood, the kind of transportation you use, your ideas and opinions, the way you talk, your siblings etc saturn ensures that they will face consequences in these aspects of their life too. they may face their own issues with communication or learning, forcing them to realize their errors. this placement encourages you to develop discipline in thought and speech, and saturn has your back by ensuring that any misunderstandings or criticisms will be met with karmic lessons for others, while you build internal strength and clarity.

saturn in the 4th house - in the 4th house, saturn protects you by ensuring that family members or figures from your past who hurt you emotionally will face karmic consequences. if you’ve been wronged by someone in your family or early life, if someone has made you question your femininity (for females), mocked where and how you live, criticized how you nurture yourself, or belittled how you express your emotions, saturn works to restore the balance. those individuals may be forced to confront their own issues in an introspective, emotional way. saturn helps you rebuild a strong emotional foundation, guiding you to heal past wounds and create a resilient, grounded home life. expect karmic justice for those who have hurt you, even if it takes time to manifest.

saturn in the 5th house - saturn in the 5th house has your back in romance, creativity, self-expression, hobbies, risk-taking, and views on children. if someone has hurt you romantically, mocked your ideas, undermined your creativity, criticized your hobbies, or belittled your thoughts on children, saturn ensures they face similar struggles in their own lives. they may find blocks in creativity, face issues with self-expression, or experience challenges in love and family. with saturn’s support, you’ll develop strong self-worth and maturity, trusting that karmic balance will be restored.

saturn in the 6th house - saturn in the 6th house has your back in areas of health, work, and service. if others undermine your work ethic, health routines, your diet, your workout routine/habits, your pets or try to create disruption in your daily life, saturn ensures that their actions will eventually backfire. saturn works to establish discipline in your routines and helps you grow from any obstacles. karma will manifest for those who create disruptions or try to hinder your progress, while saturn helps you create a strong, reliable foundation for your health and work life.

saturn in the 7th house - in the 7th house, saturn ensures karmic justice in your relationships and partnerships. if someone betrays your trust or messes with your relationships, saturn will work behind the scenes to ensure that karma catches up with them. saturn helps you learn how to set boundaries and deal with partners in a mature, responsible way. if you face relationship struggles, saturn’s energy helps you mature through them, ultimately bringing lasting, stable partnerships as a result.

saturn in the 8th house - saturn in the 8th house ensures that any deceit, betrayals, or manipulations done against you will eventually be paid back in kind. saturn helps you develop a strong inner resilience and personal transformation, guiding you to overcome fears of loss or intimacy. if others use your vulnerabilities against you, saturn will slowly bring them the consequences they deserve, helping you grow through emotional and financial maturity.

saturn in the 9th house - saturn in the 9th house has your back when it comes to your beliefs, philosophies, and higher learning, where you’ve studied and even what degree you’ve studied, your culture, your religion or if anyone mocks or tries to undermine your education or beliefs, saturn ensures they’ll face karmic consequences for their actions. saturn encourages you to develop your own system of belief and expand your intellectual horizons, guiding you to seek wisdom in a disciplined, structured way. saturn helps you overcome challenges in travel, higher education, and spirituality, rewarding your efforts with inner growth.

saturn in the 10th house - saturn in the 10th house has your back when it comes to career and public image. if anyone tries to undermine your authority or disrupt your professional reputation, tried to use you for fame or your connections, saturn will ensure that karma takes care of them. saturn helps you build a strong public presence through hard work, responsibility, and perseverance. those who try to hold you back professionally will face their own struggles, while saturn rewards your dedication and long-term commitment with career success.

saturn in the 11th house - saturn in the 11th house has your back in your social circles and friendships. if anyone betrays you within your friend groups or social networks, or if people are criticising you online for no apparent reason, saturn ensures that they face karmic consequences for their actions. saturn helps you form strong, mature friendships and build a network of people who share your values. those who try to use you for their own gain will face the repercussions of their behavior, while saturn rewards you with stable, long-lasting connections.

saturn in the 12th house - saturn in the 12th house works quietly in the background, ensuring that those who wrong you behind closed doors face their karmic consequences. if anyone has been secretively undermining your peace, mental health, or inner life, saturn works to expose their actions in time. saturn helps you heal past wounds, confront hidden fears, and develop inner strength. expect a deep, transformative period where saturn’s support will bring you lasting spiritual growth, even if the rewards are not immediately visible.

© cazshmere 2024 [All Rights Reserved]

[macncheesenibblers]

“But there’s a 19-yr old on board!” That’s nice of you to care but when have they ever cared about non-rich 19-yr olds? 19-yr olds get sent off to war, are exploited by billionaires day in and day out, 19-yr olds suffocate to death from asthma attacks caused by pollution caused by a lack of environmental regulations caused by prioritization of profits over lives and they suffocate to death due to COVID caused by a lack of care about people and a prioritization of profits over lives, 19-year olds are being forced to give birth after the overturning of roe v wade, they criticize 19-yr olds for accruing students loans going to college based on the decision they had to make for their life career at 18. Rich 19-yr olds are “teenagers” meanwhile poor and middle class 19-yr olds are “fully fledged adults.” Rich 19-yr old men are teenagers meanwhile 19-yr old women are “fair game” for old men to prey on. When have they ever cared about 19-yr olds that aren’t rich? When have they ever extended the courtesy we give this 19-yr old to us? They don’t. Everyone that’s not rich and powerful like them is disposable to them. They don’t care about us. They are rich PRECISELY because they don’t care about us.

[hotheadedhero]

Like 'em Big

AN: I have so many stories to write but I had to do this. Blaming being sick, m'kay? Fever has got me bad and these meds got me loopy. Thinking we need some good, silly fun in our lives, right? Plus, now that I've watched Rise, I'm hungry for some big Raph appreciation. I know I ain't the only one

Part 2

All characters are aged up

Raphael x Reader

Warnings: near peril, easily smitten, possible errors due to fever (what kind of fever is up for deliberation🥴)

Cutting right to the chase. You like big dudes. That doesn't necessarily mean muscles, either. You just love you a big man - someone with a bit of something-something to them. More to love, you know? Given your track record with the greater world, it shouldn't be all that much of a mystery. Cats? Get yourself a tiger that you can cuddle into. Jumpers? Comfort central, baby. Beds? If you can't spread eagle then you see no point. The old-age saying does declare that the bigger the better, so who are you to disagree? How true that is may be up for debate but it’s merely as simple as understanding what your preferences are.

However, this makes dating a difficult ballpark to play in. No matter how tall, jacked, or voluptuous someone is, it never feels like enough. Human biology and genetics can only go so far in the conceivably possible sense. You just want to be absolutely engulfed when you get a hug. Is that such a crime? Apparently, it is. Unfortunately, you also seem to come across the worst jerks when you attempt to date within this set of criteria. One might argue it's your karmic justice for being so superficial and picky but a woman has needs. Not those kinds of needs, either. Get your head out of the gutter.

All hope seems lost and after yet again, another failed date, you decide to call it in for the evening and make your way home. A fresh failure and another wonderful outfit gone to waste. By no means is it anything flashy but you put a lot of work into it: pencil skirt, turtle neck sweater, and a nice pair of boots to compliment the look. The whole shebang! All of that effort for nothing. This is the last time you spend three hours doing your hair and makeup. Block after block, your feet grow heavier with every step. What you would give to come across a mountain-like man you can climb who is also a kindred spirit. Perhaps this dream guy will forever be that - a dream. Men like that don't just fall out of the sky.

"Look out!!"

The sudden shout almost scares you into tripping over and you look behind yourself, wishing you hadn’t. Two very large, very dangerous-looking figures entangled in battle, those of which are approaching your helpless little self. You quickly duck as the giants hurdle over you. One falls on its side whilst the other claws and skids against the ground, regaining its balance. It shakes its head and locks onto you, a guttural snarl rumbling past its jowls. Such a creature is surely from the stuff of nightmares. An indescribable nightmare whose sights are set on you. The smart option would be running away but it's as though your shoes have melted into the pavement. Pawing into the tarmac, the beastly thing growls and lunges for you. Great. This is how you die: torn limb from limb by a demon dog. Well, assuming your clothes join you, at least you’ll look like a total babe in the afterlife.

"Oh no ya’ don't," the other one yells from behind the predator, grabbing it by its tail. “Pretty ladies are not food!”

With a mighty tug, he pulls it back and swings it as far away from you as possible. You release a shaky breath, legs trembling beneath you. That was far too close for comfort. The fight isn’t quite over, however. Just as it approaches him, the green goliath swivels on his feet, full 180, and whacks the creature's jaw with a closed fist. His speed alone has you in awe but the force is astounding, practically earth-shattering. It completely knocks the air around you and pushes you onto your backside.

When the dust clears, the first thing you see is your saviour panting, his spiky shell(?) pointed towards you. Just past him in the distance, you notice three more figures in blue, purple, and orange taking a closer look at the unconscious tyrant. You swear one of them pokes at it with a stick. Witnessing strange beings such as this isn't entirely new. Anyone who's watched Chateau Pretenche knows about the celebrity chef turning into a grotesque pigman. To describe it in one word? Horrifying. It's just whether people choose to believe it genuinely happened or if these bizarre entities exist. Being up close and personally observing it now puts your scepticism in check.

As the humanoid turtle calms, he turns to face you, recapturing your attention. A red mask sits over his eyes and there’s a noticeable snaggle tooth poking past his upper lip. Typically, the prerogative is keeping out of sight but it’s much too late for that. He gradually advances towards you. You watch him warily and he keeps his movements slow for that very reason. It wouldn’t be a shock if you were to try and make an escape. He wouldn’t blame you. Currently, all he wants to do is make sure you weren’t hurt during that fiasco provided you don’t suddenly come out of your bewilderment and run off. You have good reason to but he just saved you. Either that or he’s as ravenous as that beast and wants you all to himself. The irrational conclusion remains as such - irrational - when he descends to one knee and outstretches a hand. There’s an irrefutable kindness in his eyes; a caring nature that can’t be replicated in the face of savage brutes.

"You okay?" he asks.

You continue to gawk without a word but, bit by bit, you reach out for his offer. Your fingers lightly trace the centre of his palm before comfortably trusting the proposal. His hand engulfs yours completely and Raph hopes to mercy that you don’t realise how sweaty he’s getting. He can feel his heart beating like crazy. He wonders how much of that is the adrenaline from the fight and how much of it is being in the presence of such a beautiful gal. As he helps you to your feet, he rises to his own. Someone of his stature shouldn’t be capable of being this delicate but he is. It has you running through a loop and you unintentionally stare at the remarkable behemoth.

Quite pathetically, you nod, unable to verbally respond to his question. How can you? You are effectively starstruck. Once you gloss over the turtle-y features, all you see is the sheer size of him as he towers over you. Height, width, the magnitude of those arms! All of it is glorious. You can hear the universe asking, “You want a big man, huh? How about one who isn’t human?” to which you answer, “Who gives a damn?”. If the only way a man can be this big is not to be human, so be it.

Amidst a whisper, your mouth moves on its own, "You're beautiful."

"What?"

"Huh?" Blinking out of your trance, you realise what you’ve said and giggle sheepishly, "I mean, you're be... ba... booming! Totally awesome with the whole- uh... saving thing." Nailed it. 

He blinks right back down at you. This is certainly a first. He can feel his face heating up and he withdraws his hand lest you endure the wrath of his bashfulness, opting to hold the back of his head. At this moment, he seems to look anywhere but you.

"Heh. Gee, thanks." His humility is adorable and you’re glad he doesn’t question your initial statement. He turns to you once more, regaining some composure. "You sure you're okay, though? That thing was pretty scary looking."

It’s clear that you haven’t sustained any physical injuries but even bearing witness to something so unsightly can have lasting effects on one's mind. His brows furrow gently in concern down at you and it occurs to you that there’s a soft heart under all of that shell and muscle. Bonus points. This makes you smile for the first time in front of him and Raphael is sure that the streetlights got brighter.

You laugh fondly, “Yeah, I’m okay. Thank you.” Twiddling your fingers, your lips purse up in his direction.  “Is there any way I can repay you?”

He places his hands on his hips and chuckles cutely, “Just doing my duty, ma’am.”

He may be indulging in his alter ego - the Red Angel of Preventing Harm - but it’s not every day he gets paid thanks when he saves someone. It’s also not every day he gets to save such a pretty woman, either. You, however, can’t just leave it at that. There must be some way in which you can properly thank him. Ulterior motives include getting to know this already loveable lug better but shh. It feels like the odds are finally turning in your favour and you won’t let this slip away from your grasp. That’s when it hits you.

Muttering under your breath, you erratically search through the confines of your little handbag. You are certain that you had one in here somewhere. In the spare pocket maybe? Ah! Found it. Fumbling to take the lid off of your pen, you hold out your hand, gesturing for his. He slowly complies, to which you jot down a series of digits on his palm accompanied by your name and a tiny 'x'. 

"Gimme a text sometime," is the last thing he hears before you disappear around a corner.

Oh? Oh. Ohhh. Wow. Getting your number is the last thing he expected. Did he get hit on the head during that scuffle or something? Was everything from the last few minutes a dream? He bores holes into the writing on his skin, scanning it over and over, scared that it’ll disappear if he so much as blinks. A dumb, wobbly smile not so gracefully decorates his lips as he trudges back to the turtle tank. He takes his seat but it’s obvious that he isn’t all there. Being so caught up in his rose-tinted bubble, he doesn’t register his brothers' voices. In an effort to gain his attention, Michelangelo jumps onto his shoulder, partly intrigued by what their leader is so absorbed by.

"Oh me gosh!” the young brother screams in shrill excitement, “Raph's in love!"

Careful not to smudge the neat ink, he’s quick to hide his hand against his chest. "That's crazy talk!”

Donatello sniffs the air and mockingly covers his nose. "The overwhelming manifestation of your nervous stink indicates otherwise, dear brother."

"I got a girl’s number!” he continues to defend, feeling his face go all kinds of red. “'Course, I'm nervous but that don’t mean I’m in love."

Lies and slander. It was practically love at first sight. He just doesn’t like the idea of his brothers knowing that. It’s easy pickings to be made fun of.

"Don't worry, Big Red. Lucky for you, you got a guy who knows all about the charm." Leonardo points both thumbs at himself as he falls back into his seat and props his legs up on the dashboard. "First, you just need to..."

The "helpful" advice drowns out as the large snapper opens and gazes at his palm again. He just can't comprehend how a gorgeous individual such as yourself could take one look at him and give him your number. It's puzzling but he supposes there’s a first for everything? That also doesn't mean he won't text you. The only thing getting in the way of that is fear. Raphael thinks he’d rather go toe-to-toe with that mutant dog again than have to face the risk of embarrassing himself. To anyone who knows him, it’s no surprise that he caves under pressure. No. He will do it! A chance like this is one in a million.

Oh boy. What could possibly go wrong?

[astrobiscuits]

Astro obs part 10 (mostly Saturn related lol)

🧸 Individuals with Sun trine/sextile Saturn tend to have a great relationship with their grandparents (if they were a part of their life, ofcours). They usually inherit lots of traits from their grandparents

🧸 Sun trine/sextile Saturn people also have a great moral compass and sense of justice. They follow rules and regulations and are well seen in society (unless Saturn is retrograde, then they still try their best to be exemplary, but they might fail from time to time)

🧸 Most Libra Moons i've met went to law school for their university degree

🧸 Saturn in 1st house people tend to look really good when they get older. When they are young, they might often look older than their age, but once their Saturn Return hits them, they age up like "fine wine" from that moment on

🧸 Saturn in 2nd house individuals literally fit the "old money" aesthetic. Often times they come from a wealthy family. If they don't, then they are very motivated to work hard and become millionares. Bonus points if their Saturn is at 28°/29°, as 28° signifies the household degree (being famously known for your family OR in your family) and 29° signifies long-term fame for completing a (often times) karmic cycle and reaping its rewards

🧸 Saturn in 4th house peeps have always felt like the black sheep of the family. Often times they end up abandoning family traditions in the pursuit of following their own individual path. Growing up, they have often felt lonely in their family and shy around people they weren't familiar with

🧸 Saturn in 5th house individuals take their hobbies and passions seriously. They could pursue one of their hobbies/passions as a career later on. Child prodigies tend to have this placement. If there are other planets in the 5th house, those can give hints on the "talent" (but in the case of Saturn here, it's not talent, just hard work)

For ex. Saturn and Venus in 5th house - pursuing art/fashion/make-up/singing/baking sweets as a career

Saturn and Mars in 5th house - pursuing martial arts/race car driving/working out as a career

Saturn, Mercury and Pluto in 5th house - pursuing drama writing as a career

The exception would be for Saturn and Jupiter in 5th house - these people tend to have multiple talents that they could turn into careers

🧸 Saturn in 5th house is also often an indicator of an unhappy childhood. This child felt like a lot of expectations and responsabilites were placed on him by his parents from an early age. Another meaning of this placements would be that Saturn in 5th house children were brought up by their grandparents

🧸 Those with Saturn in 11th house feel more comfortable befriending people who are older than them. They're also not very keen on the latest technologies and prefer sticking to the ideals of the past long gone (aka they love victorian era and prefer to live like they're a gal/man from the 19th century). They also tend to be interested in politics

🧸 Earth Venuses and the type of chocolate they love:

Taurus Venus - milk chocolate

Virgo Venus - white chocolate

Capricorn Venus - dark chocolate

🧸 Individuals with Chiron in 5th house tend to struggle with infertility issues from a young age

🧸 Uranus in 3rd house individuals prefer taking short-haul flights when travelling short distances, while Uranus in 9th house individuals prefer taking long-haul flights when travelling long distances

🧸 Neptune in 6th house people make great psychologists and psychiatrists!! Often times these people have had a long history of dealing with certain mental illnesses, but instead of wallowing in their pain, they are inspired to help others overcome their own issues. Their capacity to emphasize with people's emotions is heightened, as they tend to relate to many of their client's symptoms. These people are also fit as somnologists (sleep doctors)

🧸 The sad part of Neptune in 6th house is that they often have to deal with stomach issues :( Their digestive system is extra sensitive, so they need to be careful with what they eat

🧸 Wanna know if you're secretly Jewish? Check out asteroids Hebrewu (271763) and Israel (7507) in your natal chart and your family's natal charts. If you find atleast one of these asteroids aspecting the angles (ASC, DSC, IC, MC), Sun or Moon in your chart and your family's charts, then there's a high chance you've got Jewish ancestry

🧸 In synastry, if your Ascendant conjuncts another person's Ascendant (so your house cusps become overlays), it's very likely that you've experienced the same events during your lives. This person would be your mirrored soul, which can prove to bring a great understanding over oneself

🧸 While we're still talking about aspects in synastry, Moon conjunct Chiron is not for the weak ones!! The Chiron person must display a sense of maturity or atleast be emotionally evolved enough to be able to deal with the Moon person. Chiron can trigger Moon's childhood trauma on a subconscious level, while Moon can trigger Chiron's deepest wounds regarding their house's themes. They can either heal each other or wound each other even more. This conjunction requires a great deal of patience and understanding between Moon person and Chiron person

[a-d-nox]

what's a venus return?

did you know that you can check more than just your sun's return? any time a planet transits and becomes exactly conjunct your planet (it is in the exact sign and degree it was when you were born), you undergo a planetary return. venus returns happen roughly every 2 years at a maximum (unless there is a retrograde then it could be about 11 months that you undergo the return). my venus return happened this past weekend so here we are continuing my previous series.

but what can a venus return chart show you?

your romantic life. who you can attract / are likely to fall in love with. how your beauty evolves. sympathy you need. pleasures you have. the art/creative work you can make. your ability to provide self-love / how you can best practice it. harmony you will find. compromises you need to make. how your aesthetic can shift. entertainment you seek. what you will value. luxury items you splurge on. where your laziness originates. how you can be more sensual.

sun

assumption that others crush on you, aesthetic others identify with you, youthfulness, attractiveness, attention from potential suitors, entertainment you seek and/or provide others, what you feel you deserve from others / the universe, what makes you different from others romantically / aesthetically, development of beauty, dignity regarding your appearance, awareness of your looks, objects that bring you joy / pleasure, validation you receive, and/or how express your self in terms of fashion / beauty

moon

emotional responses to romantic situations, loving/jealous instincts, how you show you care, romantic comfort zone, feminine aesthetic - masculine/male gaze, how your childhood effects the romantic partners you seek, fertility, how your beauty/aesthetic adapts to trends, how you breasts change/develop, romantic life habits/trends, and/or comfortability in your space

mercury

romantic communication, love language, physical touch, words of affirmation, talking phases, the creative mind, perception of beauty, creative writing, social media aesthetic/entertainment, flirty mannerisms/gestures, love defying reason, romantic change, forgetfulness that leads to laziness, romantic gossip, romance/smutty reads, self-care routine, and/or youthfulness

venus

romantic experiences, attraction, beauty, pleasures, artistic ability/projects, self-love, divine femininity, sharing romantic feelings/gestures, your aesthetic, entertainment you seek, romantic values, receiving gifts, luxury items you desire, and/or romantic sensuality

mars

romantic passion, desires, romantic confidence, creative ambition, romantic preferences, sex, jealousy, romantic competitiveness, impulsive romantic behavior, sensuality, self-assurance in your beauty, divine masculinity, masculine aesthetic - feminine/female gaze, assertiveness in a romantic connection, dominance, romantic/creative activities, sensual energy, sexuality, romantic combativeness, and/or romantic/creative motivation

jupiter

romantic luck/abundance, wealth of suitors, wealth of luxury / things that are pleasurable, romantic/creative success, romantic opportunities, topical popularity, expansion of wardrobe, entertainment knowledge, honesty in romantic relationships, romantic wisdom, ease in romance, romantic blessings, romantic optimism, justice regarding previous relationships, self exploration, artistic vision, romantic/self devotion, study of aestheticism, self-growth, and/or romantic fulfillment

saturn

romantic/creative achievement and mastery, romantic challenges/struggles, quality time, karmic romances, romantic life lessons, how your paternal figure affects you self-esteem / romantic relationships, fears regarding love, insecurities, romantic guilt, romantic delays, romantic limitations, how past romantic relationships effect new ones, self-love deficiencies, romantic practicality, romantic solitude, romantic maturity, romantic detachment, consistency you show others, grudges against competition / past lovers, and/or your relationship history

uranus

friends to lovers, dating apps, movies as a form of entertainment, sudden romantic relationship, what makes you unique in comparison to others in the dating/artistic scene, how you don't follow the beauty trends, romantic independence/freedom, open relationships, unexpected dates or contact from a suitor, shocking declarations, and/or social media fans/followers

neptune

kindness you show others, artistic creativity, glamorous appearance, sensitivity to others feelings, selflessness in a romantic relationship, escapism via love, intuitive design, use of imagination, makeup / what is presented to society, romantic mysteries, romantic confusion, evasion of commitment, self-love mantras, transcending the norms of aestheticism, fascination with appearance/design, and/or thoughts on your ideal appearance

pluto

glow-up for the self / closet, romantic power, sex, destruction of the old self, rebirth of beauty (hence "the birth of venus"), romantic intensity, magnetism experienced in the romantic realm, romantic infatuation/obsession, seductive performances, romantic manipulation, and/or closet purge

1h

aesthetic you identify with, outward/physical appearance, romantic outlook/approach, beauty, confidence, creative/romantic beginnings, initiating relationships, flirty mannerisms, presence, individuality, and/or how passionate you appear

2h

money you spend on looks, how much effort you put into your appearance, possessions you adore, self-worth/self-love, romantic values, emotional security/insecurity, romantic stability, gift giving/receiving, and/or romantic resources

3h

romantic communication, attractiveness of your speaking voice, what people enjoy about your voice, the creative mind, romantic thoughts, creative perception, opinions on fashion/beauty/love, romantic interests, romantic gossip, romance/smutty literature, appearances on social media, phone calls with romantic interests, visits with romantic suitors, and/or dates

4h

aesthetic of your home, how your family effects your relationships (particularly maternal figure), harmony your inner child seeks in connections, romantic emotions, self-care/self-love, and/or how where you live effects your relationships/appearance

5h

thoughts on children, childishness in romance relationships, pettiness, creative talent, romantic drama, romantic risk-taking, how you react to attention from others, short-term romantic relationships, creative hobbies, romantic pleasures, what suitors bring you, romantic get aways, and/or romantic joy

6h

romantic/creative routine, acts of services, physical effort made to make your body appear as it does, your romantic duties, self-improvement, romantic/creative consistency, hygiene habits, beauty routine, romantic innocence, and/or how your diet effects your appearance

7h

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8h

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9h

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10h

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11h

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12h

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[nias-nook]

Bill Cipher and The Unicorn in Captivity

Soooo, I haven't been looking at Bill related posts much since the book dropped as I have mixed feelings on what TBOB and the subsequent site have revealed about him, his motives, his backstory etc., but (and maybe someone beat me to this) one thing I haven't seen anyone talk about yet is this,

So maybe I'm stating the obvious here, but this is The Unicorn Rests in a Garden, also known as The Unicorn in Captivity. This piece was a part of The Unicorn Tapestries. Its origins are shrouded in mystery and super interesting but I'm not really gonna touch on that here.

Now there is something to be said about how this one piece, and the rest of the tapestries tie to Bill. I'll briefly go over what the tapestry meant when it was made then dive into what contemporary interpretations of the piece say about Bill and his fundamental inability to redeem himself.

Also just want to establish before we get into this that I am...Not a scholar when it comes to this stuff. I just happened to recognise this tapestry and its symbolism when it dropped on the website and had to put my thoughts somewhere. I might add more later if I've forgotten anything, which I probably have.

Given this was a piece made in Europe in the Middle Ages, it's perhaps unsurprising that a lot of interpretations of it are biblical, but we can (mostly) safely assume Hirsch isn't going for a Christ allegory here. Then again, maybe he's going for nothing and all of this is pointless.

What is a little interesting in the wake of TBOB is its ties to marriage.

These tapestries are heavily theorised to have been made to celebrate a wedding, and their comparisons of love and marriage to a hunt that inevitably leads to the imprisonment and taming of your lover. Of course, Bill quite literally suggests this method in the book with The Love Cage that he uses in Weirdmageddon, but there's a million 'Billford is canon' posts (though I think that's reductive at BEST) out there so let's table that as it's pretty self-explanatory. Bill and Ford have been hunting each other for decades and Bill imprisons him in a so-called 'Love Cage' to try and convince Ford to be his 'partner' (be it platonic or romantic). This is what a victory in a relationship is to him.

What I'd like to focus on is the modern interpretation of The Unicorn in Captivity as a self-imposed prison.

"Look at that little unicorn! The beatific smile. He's happy now. He gets to live in a beautiful garden."

"Yeah, in a cage."

"A protective barrier. No one's hunting him anymore. Nor can he hurt anyone with that horn of his."

This summary of the piece is taken from the aptly titled Unicorn in Captivity from another animated series, The Venture Bros. (which, by the way, if you're looking for another show that's a whimsical and fun riff on 80s pop culture with a big mystery element, highly recommend), but this of course isn't the first piece of media to portray it this way. the most notable being The Unicorn in Captivity poem by Anne Morrow Lindbergh.

The unicorn is, on the surface, a prisoner. The Theraprism that Bill is now trapped in is a place he longs to escape, but that's the thing, isn't it?

He could escape any time he wanted to.

Bill, like the unicorn, is trapping himself more than the Theraprism is trapping him, but his situation isn't to be pitied, it's karmic justice. What's so satisfying about Bill's eventual comeuppance is that he's the one making himself suffer. The only thing Bill needs to do to escape is to admit he was wrong, to stop revelling in the suffering of others, but...Well, he chooses not to.

He could slip his head

From the jewelled noose

So lightly tied -

If he tried,

As a maid could loose

The belt from her side;

He could slip the bond

So lightly tied -

If he tried.

For all of his guilt about his parents and his so-called 'dark and troubled past', Bill has never regretted a single person he's hurt since. He didn't regret taking over the world, he regretted being caught. He didn't regret hurting Ford, he regretted losing him. Bill will probably be doomed to wallow in the Theraprism for all eternity, cursing his situation and blaming everyone else for his inevitable downfall. An overgrown child who once had too much power and lost it all throwing a tantrum for the ages.

But now he can't hurt anyone with that horn of his.

[ninelivesastrology]

I'm going to complain about the spiritual community again. Maybe not about the spiritual community because this definitely pertains to a select amount of people.

Women who can't decenter men can't appreciate divination and often abuse it to the point of delirium.

I stand by it, man, you just need one good reading, not 30 personal readings a year and a YouTube history that looks like this consistently:

Who has a CRUSH on YOU?🍒🍥🎂

How Do They Wanna F*CK you? 👀🧿

Messages from YOUR EX 😭💧👂

WHEN IS YOUR KARMIC JUSTICE ⚖️ TWIN FLAME 🧑‍🤝‍🧑 SOUL-BOND 💌💌💌 DOMINANT KING OF SWORDS 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 ALPHA OMEGAVERSE 🍆🍆🍆🍆 💦💦💦💦 CANON DIVERGENT ↩️⤵️ COFFEE SHOP AU ☕ HURT/COMFORT 😭😭😭😭💔💔 DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT ❌❌❌ 8TH HOUSE STELLIUM ♒♑♋♊♉♍♎♓♉♐ DARK!DIVINE MASCULINE 🔫🔫🔫 LEAVING HIS 💅🌹 KARMIC FOR YOU? MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH! (IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE, YOU'LL GET $10,000 FROM YOUR SPIRIT ANIMAL IN THE 7D IN THE NEXT TWO WEEKS!)

That isn't healthy. And then they turn around to their own cards and no spread ever makes sense, send it off to their friends and their friends don't know what the fuck they're looking at, like some people aren't diviners, not everyone is meant to be. The truth is, a great deal of people are just mentally ill with an internet connection and a tarot deck.

Dare I say your bond is not that strong with your deck and that you don't have the gift of divination if you're picking it up and asking, "Am I going to meet my soulmate?" every 2 business days or asking your deck, "Does my crush want to fuck me?" And the dude is a new guy they just met and know nothing about, probably looked in their general direction once. :/ Those decks must be so tired. Just as tired as the diviners being paid to read.

I've actually just realized that some of the women I surrounded myself with were really envious of me predicting certain things about my own life and they can't divine to save their life. I've found myself mirrored by them on more than one occasion. Some people just get really hot over your relationship with spirituality. All of sudden, your deity is their deity. You grabbed a crystal for your boyfriend? They start wearing the same crystal. Their practice would be nothing without my blueprint and it hardly works out because look at them, faking it.

[lord-squiggletits]

And on the topic of Astarion making reparations to the Gur people, I think the choices he makes in the present day are far more impactful (and, if he chooses well, healing) than any sort of torture for something he did 200 years ago.

The thing about Astarion kidnapping the Gur children (which I think was like a year prior to the start of BG3) is that, because of vampire spawn/master compulsion, he literally, bodily, had no choice but to do it, right? So in this case, the obvious evil of kidnapping children clashes with the tragedy of Astarion literally/magically being compelled to do this.

BUT

In the present day of BG3, Astarion has managed to find his freedom so that he's no longer compelled to do what Cazador orders. And it's in this freedom, where Astarion's actions are his own and no one else can take responsibility, that allows Astarion to demonstrate that he's more than just his prejudices/trauma and knows how to do the right thing.

The entire point of Astarion's storyline is basically to go, yes he was a victim in the past, but now he's free! And now that he's free, he has to make decisions for himself, decide what he wants, and decide what he values. To this end, when the party encounters the Gur children in Cazador's dungeon, Astarion is confronted with one such decision. In the past, he kidnapped the Gur children, leading directly to their harm/torture, because he had no choice. However, now he DOES have a choice. And by choosing not to sacrifice the children in the ascension ritual, Astarion demonstrates that he has chosen reparations over personal gain. When finally given the freedom to follow his own path, he does the right thing. Regardless of whether you think it's more moral to kill or free all of the spawn in the ritual*, Astarion's decision is to not sacrifice the children he put in harm's way. Even though said children are members of an ethnic group he has a reason (not a good reason, but a reason) to despise.

*For their part, the Gur seem to have mixed feelings either way. If you kill the spawn, they're happy that the spawns were cleansed before they could get out and cause trouble. But if you let them go, Ulma and the others are conflicted on what to do with their now-vampiric children.

So like, I dunno. To me, if the goal is for the Gur to receive justice, it's way more impactful for justice to take the form of "Astarion uses his free will to surrender power and spare the lives of the children he kidnapped" than it would be if justice was "Oh Astarion was an asshole racist as a magistrate so him becoming a spawn is kind of karmic justice for that."

It's the difference between holding Astarion accountable for something he did 200 years ago (in a life he can't even remember, that was so long ago basically no one he might've wronged is still alive to testify) versus holding him accountable for something he's doing right now. And it means that you can engage in the issue of Astarion's racism (which is important) and how he should face consequences for that, without falling into the trap of implying that Astarion's abuse is something he deserved or that is somehow "justice" for something he did long in the past.

Actually another Astarion hot take that I have is that idc what was in early access or the supplementary material, I take what's in the game at current release and the current lore is that Astarion barely remembers anything from his past life, so there's no way of knowing if he was a corrupt magistrate or not.

But even if we did know, I think that that's irrelevant to Astarion's storyline and if anything obfuscates what the themes of his story are supposed to be. It's very clear that his entire character is an allegory for/literally an example of someone who's a survivor of abuse and sex trafficking, and what's one of the most basic tenets of dealing humanely with abuse survivors? Understanding that no one deserves to be abused. So to me, even bringing up the question of "So was Astarion a good magistrate or a corrupt one?" is bringing in a moral judgement, and with that moral judgement brings a silent question of "So, did Astarion deserve what happened to him as karmic justice, or is he just an innocent victim who was in the wrong place at the wrong time?"

And when you consider the timeline of Astarion's pre-vampiric life (39 years) versus his vampiric life (200 years), it's very clear that even if you go purely by numerical terms, all of the suffering Astarion has gone through is way out of proportion to any wrongdoing he did. And again, I have to emphasize that for a character whose entire story is an allegory for abuse and whose themes revolve around the cyclical nature of abuse, bringing in ideas of good/bad and whether Astarion did something to deserve it or not is counterproductive to the narrative the writers chose, which was to focus on how trauma warps people into the worst versions of themselves. In order to remain thematically and (dare I say) morally correct, a story about an abuse victim shouldn't involve their backstory being "well, he kind of had it coming."

Though again, even if Astarion was canonically (not in EA, not in supplementary materials, in game during content that players can access) a shitty magistrate/person in his past life, literally no one deserves to be kept as a slave, emotionally abused, tortured, isolated, sexually exploited, and dehumanized. That's an incredibly punitive way of thinking that, again, is at odds with the primary theme of Astarion's story, which is about how an individual copes with trauma and deals with the cycle of abuse.

Plus, if you really want Astarion to be a problematic fave... he literally is problematic, right now, during the course of the game's story. I don't see how Astarion's actions as a magistrate 200 years ago are even relevant compared to all the bullshit he's doing right now that he's actually directly responsible for 😂😂😂

Though if you want my thoughts on Astarion's backstory re: the Gur (which idk if anyone else has talked about but I feel like they deserve a stronger presence in discussions of him), see the cut (and also my next reblog bc I want to give them their own section)

First of all, I'd like to point out that Astarion was turned into a vampire 200 years ago, and every single member of the Gur tribe that we see is human. Assuming that every Gur is human, that means that every single person who could've possibly been involved in Astarion's rulings as a magistrate (good or bad) is long dead, and so are their children, and their children's children.

And since the Gur hate vampires and see them as undead abominations, would they even see Astarion becoming a vampire spawn as justice?? If anything, they would be angry about the creation of another vampire and the fact that a vampire lord is free to create more victims to torture whenever he wants. So even if you want to go at it from a punitive justice perspective on behalf of the Gur, I'm not sure Astarion's enslavement would even be a satisfying punishment from their eyes. You know, assuming Astarion even did anything wrong to begin with, which in my opinion is purely up to headcanon anyways.

Secondly, a lot of people bring up EA Astarion having done deals with Cazador and sending him children before becoming a vampire. And they usually do this with a silent implication of, "Of course Astarion is racist towards the Gur, he was already racist towards them before." But I don't think that necessarily has to be the case. There's obviously no good reason to be racist towards anyone, but given that this is a story where characters are supposed to be realistic and flawed, I think that Astarion hating Gur because he was murdered by a gang of Gur is sufficient explanation. And rather than EA Astarion's raw, pure asshole bigotry, current!Astarion's bigotry is way more sympathetic in a "tragedy for everyone involved" sort of way. What I mean is:

Whatever ruling Astarion made, whether it was good or bad or neither, he was beaten to death by a gang of vigilantes. Even if the vigilantes just intended to seek justice for their side (assuming that Astarion's ruling was even against the Gur to begin with, the thugs could've just as easily been hired by some noble), their actions led to Astarion being enslaved by an evil vampire and tortured for centuries. It's a "nobody wins" scenario where an act of hatred (on Astarion's part, the Gur's part, or some random person who wanted Astarion killed) led to immeasurable suffering even though most of the people who instigated the fight to begin with are already long dead. Not just Astarion's suffering, but also his siblings, as well as all the victims they took on Cazador's behalf.

And while there's nothing in current BG3 precluding Astarion from having been racist to Gur while he was alive, I really prefer the idea of him only becoming bigoted due to trauma. Because again, to reiterate the point I made above, quibbling about whether Astarion was a racist or corrupt or evil when he was alive dilutes the themes of his story from "abuse victim empowered to choose between freedom or perpetuating the cycle" to "yeah, he was a victim, but he was kind of an racist asshole so he did deserve it a little."

I'm not saying this because I think Astarion needs to be a blameless victim, or because I think abuse survivors IRL can't be problematic/should have any problematic behavior be excused because they're traumatized. I'm speaking of it purely from a narrative perspective, especially from the angle of representation. The way stories portray abuse, if done poorly, can perpetuate stereotypes about abuse victims, such as saying that they must've done something to warrant being treated badly, or that certain types of people deserve to be abused because they're evil.

And even though it's perfectly okay to write characters who are shitty and problematic, I think writing stories in a way that perpetuate harmful views towards real life people and social issues is something that definitely SHOULD be avoided.

I'm also going at it from a restorative justice perspective. As someone who prefers to write stories with a more humanistic perspective, I've never liked the "Astarion kinda deserved it if he was evil beforehand" take because... Cazador?? Is not an agent of justice whatsoever? He's a shitty, controlling, abusive vampire who takes pleasure in controlling and torturing others. He treated his vampire spawn as slaves to bring him victims and even planned to sacrifice their lives for his own benefit. Even if you think it's possible for the spawn to deserve what Cazador did to them, how is it morally right to condone/water down Cazador's actions by implying that one (or more) of his victims was a shitty person, so technically it's just karma in a way? Cazador isn't some karmic force delivering justice to people who tried to escape it-- he's literally just an asshole abusing other people for fun.

[pileofmush]

you don't know what i deserve .·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·..·:*¨ ¨*:·.

ft. okkotsu yuuta

it’s 1 a.m. on the fifteenth of February and there’s a corpse on your kitchen floor. still fresh: odorless and warm to the touch. you're on your own—just you and the dead body.

info : ̗̀➛ tags: gn!reader, neighbor au, strangers to lovers, yuuta & reader are a little strange, happy ending // cw: death, light angst, vulgar language, canon-typical violence...but pretty mild imo

thoughts : ̗̀➛ helllooo. back on my bullshit. let's call this a very belated birthday present to my beloved <3 // read this on ao3

wc : ̗̀➛ 5.1k

The human body contains a shit ton of blood. 

Which is not something you think about often, but now you are forced to confront this fact in real-time. People… have a lot of blood.

And it stains. No matter how many times you wash your hands. There are still flakes of blood wedged underneath your fingernails. Part of you thinks it'll never go away.

...And then there's Sailor Moon.

“I am the pretty guardian who fights for love and justice! I am Sailor Moon! And now, in the name of the moon, I’ll punish you!”  

Cue trumpets and flashy poses; the makings of a battle. Your comfort anime blares in the background of a morbid scene, the flickering TV casting a soft glow on a sight that will inevitably haunt your nightmares. 

Because it's 1 a.m. on the fifteenth of February and there’s a corpse on your kitchen floor. Still fresh: odorless and warm to the touch. You pace in your tiny living room, unsure of what to do, of how to proceed. The pretty Sailor Guardians won’t save you now. You’re on your own. Just you and the dead body.

How romantic.

The chill from outside has swept into your apartment thanks to that annoying fucking prick who left your window open. Honestly, people these days have no decency. The least he could’ve done was close your shutters after tumbling through your bedroom window like a deranged acrobat. Now you’re, like, moderately cold. 

“What a fucking mess,” you sigh.

Blood seeps into the earthy Persian rug that you got for half-price at a flea market a few months ago. It’s dark; puddling, like... like a knocked-over glass of chocolate milk, spilled all over the kitchen table. Or, maybe chocolate syrup would be more apt. It doesn’t matter, though. You can always get a new rug. You know, if you make it out of this situation of yours intact and not in a dingy prison cell for homicide.

Hmm. You might be sorta kinda screwed. 

The police, of course, are out of the question. No matter your side of the story, it wouldn’t hold up in trial. No, no, no. A foreigner murdering a Japanese citizen? Even if it was in self-defense, it wouldn’t matter. Forget prison—you’ll probably be hanged.

So, you could run… But you probably wouldn’t get far. Or, you could do what every naive murderer in the movie about karmic retribution does and try your darnedest to get away with it.

“Option two it is!” you quit pacing and announce to the room. Thankfully, the body doesn’t respond.

A weak knock at the door sounds off—a gunshot. Your heart stalls, your head snapping to the entrance of the apartment. Who the hell is at your door? The person at the door knocks a second time, a little bit more insistently, and you start to sweat. “Hello, is everything alright? I—I heard a scream.”

You step up to the peephole and squint. A mild-looking man shuffles his feet outside your door. It’s your next-door neighbor, bathed in the ugly yellow lighting of your apartment complex. He smiles like he knows that you can see him. 

This… isn’t ideal. You could choose to not answer him, but that probably wouldn’t work. What if he called the police? You take a breath. “Everything’s fine,” you call out.

The man’s smile freezes in place, somehow more eerie than a frown; his hands burrow deeper into his pockets. “Oh!” he says. “Are… Are you sure?”

You turn away from the peephole, a little unnerved. “Yeah, why?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to intrude, but I heard a lot more than a single scream.”

A slow, dreadful feeling starts to seep into your gut. “Pardon?” 

There’s a pause. You swallow.

“These walls are thin.” 

Fuck. He knows. Oh God, he knows. 

No—that’s impossible. You were the only one to scream. Yasuhiro… He didn’t get the chance to. So this is just a concerned neighbor checking in on you. Nothing more, nothing less. You can prove it, prove that you’re okay.

You open the door a smidge so that you can peek through, then step outside and shut the door behind you. Your neighbor, what’s his name again? Okkotsu, right? Okkotsu’s brows lift at the sight of you, then relax. He’s wearing a plain white tee and a pair of grey sweats that should probably be criminal in Japan. His eyes flicker up and down your frame. You suppress a shiver.

“Just a horror movie,” you broach, offering him a polite smile. “I’m an easy fright.”

Okkotsu pulls a hand out of his pocket to awkwardly rub the back of his neck. His gentle smile has dimmed. “I’m not sure I believe you,” he says in an apologetic tone.

You both notice the tremor that runs through your body. Nosy fucking neighbors and their lack of sense when it comes to minding their own business. You stare mulishly at the floor. His shoes are simple. Black; scuffed. His left foot taps once against the floor. Whatever. You don't have to answer to him. Gathering up your resolve, you start to speak. “Listen, Okkotsu-san,” you say but are cut off quickly.

“Is that blood?” 

That makes you freeze, eyes glued to the floor. A cold set of fingers dips under your chin and gently lifts it. Your gaze meets his: two pools of an endless, starless night. It flickers to a spot beside your ear knowingly and you reach for it. 

He’s right. Blood sticks to your fingers, not yet dry. Lurking in the crevice behind your ear. You missed a spot.

“Well spotted.” It’s fruitless to lie now. You know it, he knows it. Now it’s a matter of who’ll crack first. 

“Are you… Are you injured?”

Physically? No. Psychiatrically? Well, you just murdered a man, so.

“I’m unharmed.” 

Okkotsu blinks owlishly. “Is that so?” He murmurs curiously, tilting your head to the side to observe the blood staining your skin. 

You readjust your head and mimic him, blinking slowly. “Okkotsu—”

“Yuuta,” he interrupts. 

You blink again. For such a mild, polite-seeming boy, he really is quite rude. And confusing. And terrifying. And you kinda sort of want him to die. “Okkotsu-san” you repeat. “I think it’s best if you leave.”

Okkotsu Yuuta’s smile returns, and it’s dangerously innocuous. He breathes your name out like a question. Starless eyes wander to your front door, then go back to studying your own. “Can I come inside?” he asks, quietly. 

Everything stills, even your heart. You’re not quite certain you’re alive, when you ask, dubiously, “The apartment?” 

Okkotsu just smiles.

You let Okkotsu come inside.

Which is absolutely fucking insane, but you have a feeling that your neighbor’s worse off than you are, and that’s truly saying something. 

You hear him lock the door behind you before you start. Silently, you lead him past your living room, past Tsukino Usagi flying down the sidewalk on the way to school—the start of another episode, then—past your browning house plant hanging from the ceiling, into your quaint kitchen. 

It’s nothing special. A small green stove with two bunsen burners on top. A sink; limited counter space. A couple of peeling cabinets. Tied in together with a white backsplash, shifting colors with each flicker of the TV. To the side, a small table sits, with two mismatched chairs tucked into it. 

Oh, and there’s the dead body, too. Practically dribbling blood, painting your discounted rug muddy red and the surrounding blue tile purple. 

Okkotsu lets out a soft sigh. “What a mess.”

You consider him from the corner of your eye. “That’s what I said,” you frown.

He shrugs, still looking at poor, dead, Yasuhiro. “Well, it’s true, isn’t it?” 

Yeaaaah. It’s true.  

A giggle escapes you, the reality of the situation finally hitting you. “Fuck,” you whisper in between the giggles. “I’m fucked.” It’s true. Utterly and thoroughly—no condom used. 

“Not yet,” you barely hear him say over the fracturing of your composure. This is impossible. You killed a man tonight, then showed a stranger the corpse. You’re an idiot. You’re a freak. You can’t hide a dead body. You really might as well bend over and get it over with. Fuck.

Hands gripping your knees, you struggle to catch your breath. When did you lose it? Ah, who cares? Dead. You’re dead. The noose is looped around your hollowed throat, tightening by the second. Perhaps there’ll be two corpses on your kitchen floor by the time the sun is up. Perhaps you should’ve just let him kill—

“Breathe with me,” Okkotsu mutters, right in front of you, long hands gingerly clutching your shoulders. Which is strange. You had no idea he got so close. His thumbs swipe up and down, around and around, and you are flummoxed. But Okkotsu is patient, his chest compressing and expanding with each measured breath, and you are compelled to follow him. Slowly, you come down from your panicked high. You let out a shaky breath, eyes sliding back to the imposing guest in your apartment. The other imposing guest in your apartment.

The body in front of you lays eerily still, impervious to your mini breakdown. It’s not purple, or rotting, or excreting out the last remaining fluids left in its underwhelming husk. It’s just—laying there. Laying, not lying, because it is no longer a breathing thing that rests; now an object to be placed. Dehumanized, in every way. Then again, what is dehumanization if not just another word for murder? What is murder, if not just the taking away of a person’s autonomy? Dead bodies can’t rest. It will never lie again. 

The dead body lays.

And you wonder for how much longer you’ll keep your own autonomy.

When do the dead start to attract flies? Realistically, you know it can range from a day to a few days for a decomposing body to become…obscene, depending on the environmental conditions. It hasn’t even been a few hours. You doubt flies will start buzzing around any time soon. If you move to crouch down and touch it, it’ll probably still be warm.  

The swipe of a thumb over your shoulder brings your awareness back to your neighbor. 

“Why are you helping me?” You ask, wiping the tears that have beaded up in the corners of your eyes. Your breathing is steadier now, but you’re still trembling. That damn window is still open. 

The hands on your shoulders release, and you look up to gauge his thoughts. He’s frowning. His eyes cloud, then sharpen: lightning against a black sky. “You need to get rid of the body, don’t you?” It’s a rhetorical question, but you nod anyway. 

“Then we’ll figure it out. Don’t worry. I bet we’ll be done before dawn.”

He makes to walk away but you stay rooted to your spot, trying to figure out why this strange, strange neighbor of yours who makes friends with stray cats and tends to the apartment garden is willing to become an accomplice of murder for you. 

“Okkotsu, are… Are you in love with me or something?” 

Your neighbor stops, then snorts, and it sends a shiver down your spine. He turns back to face you. A soft pout lies on his lips as he skillfully evades your question with a request of his own. “Hey, if you’re gonna ask me something like that, why don’t you use my name next time?”  

You don’t ask again.

You have far bigger problems than interrogating Okkotsu Yuuta, so you push it aside and stalk toward the body. Okkotsu joins you, and the two of you peer at the deceased man before you. It’s… Still. The blood has stopped its puddling; a thin line stretches the column of its throat. His throat was slit neatly, gracefully, like an act of love. It wasn’t one, but, maybe you gave Yasuhiro what he wanted, in a terrible, twisted way. How magnanimous of you. 

Yasuhiro wasn’t an attractive man. Limp brown hair framing a slightly uglier-than-average face. At least he had the decency to close his eyes before his last, dying breath. They were blood-shot and wiry, the last time you saw them open. Bouncing haphazardly in its sockets like they couldn’t discern which corner of the room you stood in.  

Okkotsu perks up at the sound of your harrumph. “What?” he questions you, and you slide your eyes over to him. Okkotsu Yuuta is distinctly pale, a trait that you’ve always noticed and have always sort of admired on him. It suits the subdued, yet haunted look he’s got going on. Black lashes feather the whites of his eyes, as well as the endless void of his irises. Yeah, he’s almost doll-like, in that gentle, haunting way of his. 

“You’re creepier than the corpse,” you tell him instead and turn away, just barely hiding your smile. The laugh that rings out from him sounds like nails grating on a chalkboard. 

Just kidding. It actually sounds kind of sweet.

Okkotsu follows you to the bathroom, where you’ve grabbed pretty much all of your cleaning supplies. You stuff them in a bucket and he hauls it out of your arms, the two of you shuffling back to the kitchen. 

“So how should we go about this?” You muse, staring at the body. The movies you’ve seen are the only reference you have for the disposal of dead bodies, but those usually end with the killer getting caught, so you’re not so sure about mimicking their methods. 

“I’m not sure,” Okkotsu says, tilting his head in thought. “Severing his limbs without the proper tools would be difficult. I guess we could carry him and bury him somewhere unassuming—unless you have a car that we could use?” A quick glance at you confirms that you don’t. He rubs his chin, nodding to himself. “Right. A garden cart will do, then. We should check to see if he has any identifiers on him, first, though. Oh, and we can’t forget about the teeth. Do you have any pliers?” He turns to you casually, eyes widening at the sight of your awe. 

Thin black brows furrow in confusion. “What?” He asks.

You blink. “Have you…ever…?” Your voice dies in your throat.

Thankfully, he gets it. “Oh. No! No, I’ve never murdered a person,” he denies, dipping his head and tugging the neckline of his plain white tee. A curious look crosses his face. “But I could,” he tacks on cautiously.

You hug your arms and give a half-assed shrug. You can almost feel the weight of a kitchen knife in your dominant hand; the quick, fluid motion of ending a life. 

“Anyone could,” you acquiesce, dismissing the conversation. Okkotsu hums mournfully in return. 

According to his ID, Yasuhiro Souta is a twenty-seven-year-old male who lives in Chiba. What he was doing tumbling through your window in the middle of the night is anyone’s guess. Well, he did tell you, sort of shakily before he made to lunge at you, that you were supposedly his Valentine for the night. How sweet!

Snip. You met him for the first time a little over two months ago. He dropped his wallet on the train, so you picked it up and handed it to him in a silly attempt to be a decent person. It resulted in the man refusing to let go of your hand for a solid five minutes. Yes, yes, what an adorable meet-cute! Snip. When you managed to pry your clammy hands out of his vice-like grip, it was your stop, and, oh, how fortuitous, it was Yasuhiro’s as well! He followed you off the train into a random coffee shop, and it was only when you got the help of the employees that he backed off, the doorbell chiming as the glass door swung behind his back. Snip.

You thought that was the end of it, and proceeded about your day, running errands for a few hours until you retreated home. It shook you up for a little, yes, but it was nothing too crazy. You doubted you’d ever see him again. 

Snip.

You slice Yasuhiro’s ID with your scissors until it’s a pile of ashes. 

Okkotsu’s on his knees, holding a pair of pliers to the light. Wedged between the metal lies a crooked tooth. He hums to himself, plopping the tooth in a ziplock bag. He wears a pair of green garden gloves he grabbed from his apartment; you’re wearing a matching set. The rubber’s a little too big for you, but you’re making it work.

It's as Okkotsu calmly adjusts the head in his lap, preparing to yank another tooth that you stare at your strange partner, wondering how in the hell you got yourself into this situation. It’s been happening every so often: your acceptance of reality swinging in the opposite direction like the pendulum on a grandfather clock. 

You shouldn’t have killed him.

You don’t care for Yasuhiro Souta’s life. You don’t care for the man who intended to assault you. But there’s not a chance in hell that this won’t get traced back to you. 

You're fucked.

Why did it have to be like this? Why do bad things happen to good people?

That’s the way the cookie crumbles, darling.

And you crumble—crumbled—are crumbling when you turn to your neighbor. “Okkotsu-san,” you say, picking at your dirty nails.

“Yuuta,” the man insists. What a freak. He's a freak, and he's good, and you don't deserve it.

You take a deep breath, mulling over your doomed fate. It doesn’t have to be his, too. “You should get out of here. While you still can.”

There's an awkward pause. The strange man pulls out another tooth and plops it in the baggy. “There,” he says warmly, then draws to his full height. “Do you have a coffee maker?” You ball your fists around the plastic handle in your hands. Calm, calm, stay calm. “Did you hear what I just said?” You ask. 

“Oh, I did,” Okkotsu hums. “I chose to ignore it.”

Your hands begin to shake as you repeat his words. “Ch—Chose to—” 

Okkotsu says your name pityingly. “I thought we already had this conversation," he questions with pinched brows. “Why are we—”

“We?!” You interrupt, incensed. We. It's as if the curtains have been drawn open, allowing the rays of the illuminating, scorching sun to trickle through. It blinds you, and you have the urge to pull your eyes out and shove them down his throat. “You thought we? Who are you? You don’t know a damn thing about me!”

“I think I know a few things about you,” Okkotsu smiles sweetly, gesturing to the dead body in your apartment.

“Do you, now?” You laugh and toss your hands up to the ceiling. “Great! I have an idea!" You glare, the metal edge of your scissors catching the light. "If you know what I’m capable of, then you should get the hell out." 

A pause. You pant, more worked up than have been all night and it's fucking ridiculous and you hate it. You want to choke—you want him to choke. On your blood-soaked fingers, preferably. He'd probably lick them clean. 

Unaware of your depraved thoughts, Okkotsu’s lips pull into a frown. He sighs, running a ghostly hand through his hair.

“I’m not scared of you,” he tells you, quietly.

You hold your breath. “Maybe you should be.”

Your insufferable neighbor takes a step forward, that stupid frown still on his stupid doll face. “What’s your plan?” He prompts. “Do you intend to confess? To go to prison?” You shake your head slowly and he softens. “You don’t deserve that,” he says, like he really means it.

Why did you let this man into your house? Why is he offering you hope? It’s too much. The scissors slide out of all your fingers save for one; your limbs sag with a weariness that’s settled deep in your bones. 

“You don’t know what I deserve.”

Okkotsu stops and considers you. Your chest heaves, your heart pounds, and you want out. You want out, and he can get out, and you don’t know… You don’t know why…

“If you want me to judge you, I won’t,” says Okkotsu. 

You shake your head at his dismissal, your eyes squeezed shut. “I can’t judge you,” he continues, and there goes his cold, calloused hand again, gingerly tilting your chin upwards. The pair of scissors in your clutches drops fruitlessly to the floor. When you look up, there’s something like pleading in his endless, starless eyes. “Trust me,” he begs. 

You shouldn’t. You know it with every fiber of your being that you should not trust Okkotsu Yuuta. The man who blinks like an owl and stares at you like you’re a mouse he can’t wait to swallow whole. Who blushes pink whenever you hold the elevator door for him. Who has cold fingers that cradle you so gingerly—who touches you like he knows you—who doesn’t cringe at the sight of dead bodies but gives a damn about a bit of blood staining the outside of your ear. 

You shouldn’t. Trust him. But you—you feel as if he’s reached inside your chest and plucked out your pulsing, blackened heart. 

“Do you love me?” You ask Okkotsu Yuuta again, heart throbbing in his hand.

His eyes don’t stray from yours. “Ask me again with my name,” he says quietly. 

…You don’t know if you want to. 

Releasing a breath, you push past him, snatch the ziplock bag from the floor, and stride towards the stove. “I’ll make coffee,” you say, already fiddling with the grinder.

Okkotsu lets you depart with a sigh.

“So what do you like to do when you’re not helping random people bury bodies?” You ask Okkotsu a couple of hours later. You stumble over a root in the dark, and Okkotsu’s quick to grab you by the waist and steady you. You continue, a bag full of your keys, water, pepper spray, freshly-bleached gloves, a burner phone that Okkotsu already had, for some reason, and two sets of clean clothes swinging against your back. You fidget with the shovel in your hands mindlessly, trying to get it to spin. A garden cart with a tarp draped over it creaks along the grass floor. The two of you have walked for who knows how long, but, according to him, you’re getting close. 

The man beside you hums, surprisingly chipper for the nefarious activities afoot. “When I’m not busy, I like to garden and crochet. I also like making food for my friends from time to time,” he says in a simple, humble manner. The last part doesn’t surprise you. He’s brought you helpings of food on the most random occasions, showing up at your doorstep with self-proclaimed “leftovers” and shoving full plates into your arms with a velvety smile. That does beg the question, though…

“Have you considered us friends this whole time?” You squint at him in the dark, only the moonlight carving out the contours of his subtle, delicate features. You’re kind of surprised. You two made decent neighbors but only ever talked in short bursts outside your rooms. Your conversations rarely ever broke past polite mumblings about the weather.  

Okkotsu pouts. “You mean, we’re not friends yet?” He asks, before breaking into a twinkling laugh. 

“Shut up,” you bite, but you laugh too, lightly shoving at his arm. Okkotsu, bless him, pretends to stumble. It takes you a moment to suppress the heat burning the tips of your ears, but you do get it under control, eventually. “I meant… Before?”

His expression smoothens out before he gives a soft shake of his head. “No, not quite. But, I wanted us to be."  

It’s quiet for a moment, nothing but the rustling under your feet and the ever-present, cacophonous sounds of nature. You spot a nest of sleeping birds tucked in between the branches of a tree and smile.

“Well,” you try to keep your cool, eyes sweeping over the forest's shadows, “Better late than never.”

It strikes you halfway to the burial grounds that Yasuhiro didn’t bring his phone with him to your apartment in his depraved, intoxicated state. He crawled up a tree, through your cracked-open bedroom window—conveniently avoiding cameras. So, once you’re done with this, you very may well be free.

It’s a terrifying notion, freedom.

“What about you?” Okkotsu asks you, something like ten minutes later. “What do you like to do for fun? Besides watch Sailor Moon, I mean.”

You bite your lip to keep from grinning. “Well,” you wonder aloud. “This is pretty fun, wouldn’t you say?” 

Okkotsu lets out a little breath before he softly admits his agreement. 

It rained earlier today, you forgot. The ground crumbles like clay when you swing the shovel into the ground. You and Okkotsu take turns making a grave, taking water breaks in between. There is hope alive in you, you realize, as the two of you work in tandem.

Yasuhiro Souta is lowered into the ground with all the dignity a dead man could possess. He lays atop a tarp and your old Persian rug. A stream rushes somewhere nearby, bubbling like blood, and you pray that the body will make good fertilizer. When your hand shakes, Yuuta grabs it. 

You bury your clothes on the way back, a mile out. The sun peaks over the horizon.

When you return to your room with Yuuta in tow, your emotions overwhelm you: you are terrified and gleeful and sorry for all you’ve done. 

It is mournfully quiet as you mop the purple tiles blue, bleach burning your nostrils and freshly scrubbed gloves. Yuuta’s left to clean the garden cart in the gardens. He returns shortly, though, offers you a small smile, and helps you scrub every inch of your apartment. 

You scrub, and scrub. 

And scrub.

“You’re beautiful,” Yuuta says to you when you’re in the middle of wiping your brow. You’re sitting cross-legged on your rugless kitchen floor, where a dead body once lay. Sweat clings to your skin in uncomfortable places and you reek of bleach. “Shut the fuck up and scrub, Yuuta,” you command. 

Yuuta’s serene smile is unparalleled to anything you’ve ever seen before.

You could probably fall in love with him, you contemplate as you watch your neighbor make fluffy pancakes in the comforts of his own kitchen. If you haven’t fallen in love with him, already, that is. You doubt you’ll ever have a connection with someone as profound as the bond you share with the soft-spoken man who helped you bury a dead body. 

Love, you marvel, in the span of a few hours.

It’s disquieting. 

After multiple showers, and after Yuuta’s stuffed you with more pancakes than you can chew, the pair of you are lounging on his tatami mat, a much-needed change in scenery. You have like, three hours before you need to go to work, which, Yuuta agrees, is crucial to maintaining a veneer of normalcy. Which means this impromptu nightmare date will have to come to an end—as all good things do.

“I should probably get to bed,” you say after a lull in conversation.

Yuuta nods, reasonably. “That makes sense, yeah.” 

“Got work in the morning and all that,” you continue in a nonchalant tone.

“Make sure your window’s locked.”

Fine. “Walk me out, will you?” You request. Okkotsu Yuuta, ever the gentleman, agrees, even though the front door is only a handful of feet away. He pushes himself off his knees and stands at full height, though his starless eyes are, as always, trained on you. You would probably find Yuuta’s full attention a little unsettling if you had not just slit a man’s throat that night. 

You avoid his gaze all the same—stopping at his doorstep with your hands twisting at your sides. Yuuta stops beside you and waits patiently for you to string your words together. 

You clear your throat. “Hey, um—”

“Hi,” Yuuta interrupts, and you smile, filled with the courage to go on. 

“So, the thing is… Well, I probably wouldn’t have made it anywhere far without you. I acted quite amateur back there, you’d think this was my first dead body I was trying to hide, or something, ha. Um, so yeah, thank you—from the most sincere and vulnerable depths of my heart. I guess I’ll see you around? Okay, bye.”

A hand wraps around your wrist before you can run home with your tail tucked between your legs. Yuuta murmurs your name in a soft, dulcet tone, and you’re not certain you’re prepared to hear whatever he has to say. You turn to face him anyway, because, well, you owe him that much.

“Yes?” 

“Don’t you have something to ask me?” He chides.

The pit in your stomach swoops. “Not that I recall,” you lie with a straight face.

“Try again,” Yuuta smiles sweetly, like a haunted little doll.

“It’s been a long day, you know—” 

“Cold, I’m afraid.”

“My brain isn’t functioning at its peak—” 

“Hmm, getting colder!”

“I don’t think I can.”

A pause. You avert your gaze and allow yourself to get analyzed by Yuuta’s doleful, starless eyes. “Hey,” he calls your name, asks you to look at him. 

You look at him.  

“Good," he hums.

You roll your eyes, loop an arm around his long neck, and drag him to you. 

Okkotsu Yuuta tastes like the earth. From dust to dust, you are at the end and beginning when you capture his lips between yours. He responds quickly, hands digging firmly into your waist as he knocks you into his door frame, and you quickly learn what it means to be savored. You intended the kiss to be a quick, rash, thing, but he slows you down, melds into you languidly like you have all the time in the world. When he sucks on your bottom lip, you both moan, breaking apart for air. Yuuta slips his hands underneath your shirt, and for once, his cold hands burn, lighting the fire for something you’re not certain you’ll be able to finish. 

“Go ahead and ask me already, love,” Yuuta murmurs into your ear. And, well, fuck. You melt. “Yuuta,” you whisper as he nips at your neck. “You love me, yes?” 

At that, he bites down at the hollow of your neck. You gasp, then sigh when he instantly cools the wound with his tongue. “Obviously,” he replies, quite simply, thumb swiping delicately at your stomach. 

“Great,” you gasp, and Yuuta looks at you and beams. 

And, there goes your heart again, pulsing in his cold, calloused hands. Cradle it gently, Yuuta, won’t you?

fin. if u made it this far, ily

[samiswifey]

Happy To See Her

Paring: Sam Carpenter x Fem!Reader

Warning: none

Summary: just an overeager girlfriend reader happy to see Sam.

From a young age Sam has known that she wasn't really wanted. Her mother never liked her and when she found the diary that because way more obvious to her. The man Sam knew as her father just up and left her without saying a word, leaving her absolutely heart broken. The only one who really wanted her around was Tara, but she ruined that when she just left. Yes things are good now with them but she's still afraid that one day Tara's going to decide that she too doesn't want Sam and eventually will leave her too. Like some kind of sick Karmic justice.

Today has been exhausting for Sam. People were a lot more vocal with their hate toward her and it was starting to get to her. She was sad, and quite frankly hurt by the hateful words. She usually didn't let people's words get to her but this was hard to ignore when they're in your face everyday. Where ever you go you get hate and Sam was tired of it. She wanted peace and for people to leave her alone, but unfortunately she knew that because of her status as a junior Loomis that was never going to happen. She was stuck getting hate forever.

Walking inside the apartment she barely put her things down before she had two arms wrapped tightly around her in a loving hold. She didn't even have to look to know who it was.

"Sammy! I am so happy you're back!" You gushed excitedly as you looked at her. "How was your day baby?"

Sam couldn't help but smile at how happy you were to see her. It made her heart swell with absolute adoration and love because of the fact that you were genuinely happy to see her.

"Uh, things were good babe. Nothing particularly interesting happened today." She said softly.

You looked at her with a wide smile before dragging her to the couch and making her sit down before running off. You said nothing before running into the kitchen to grab what you had made for her. It wasn't much but you knew that Sam would appreciate it.

"A hot meal for the hottest girl I know!" You said as you handed her a plate of food. "Enjoy."

Sam had just finished eating after work but she definitely wasn't about to let this go to waste. Especially after you worked for hard to make dinner for her. It was sweet and the food looked amazing so that was a bonus.

"Oh my gosh! Baby this is amazing!"

You smiled at how honest she was. You weren't a cook, in fact you couldn't cook, but knowing that Sam enjoyed what you made had you smiling proudly at the fact that she likes your food.

"I'm glad you like it. It took some time but I think I pulled it off." You said proudly.

Sam pulled you in for a tight hug and kissed the top of your head. "You did amazing baby and I am so proud of you." She said softly. "So proud baby."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sam was sitting on the couch watching you do a puzzle that you had discovered. It looked pretty simple but you've been at it for an hour now and you seemed to be very entertained by it. She didn't really understand the hype about puzzles but she did enjoy watching you have fun.

"Baby how are you not bored yet?" Sam asked.

You giggled as you glanced at her. "Because it's so fun! I think I'm close to putting the whole puzzle together. I just need some time." You said. Sam said nothing and just sat back and watched as you continued with your puzzle.

With a sweet smile on her face Sam takes out her phone and records you. She didn't know why but she wanted to capture this moment. It wasn't anything super significant, but you look at peace with the world around you and to her that was reason enough to take a video of you.

"Sammy quick take a picture! Take a picture!" You shouted excitedly.

Sam chuckled but did what she was asked and took a picture. "Why did you want a picture?" She asked. "Because I want to remember this day forever! How I actually completed a puzzle I started and didn't forget about it halfway through." You told her. Sam nodded and decided to take another picture from a better angle.

Carefully placing the puzzle on the table you smiled again as you took another picture. You knew you had enough but you were just so excited that you actually finished that you had to take another one just for the memories.

"Sam! Y/n! We need your help." Tara yelled as she walks in.

"Yes please tell Tara here that the Babadook is a bad movie." Mindy says.

While you were confused Sam knew exactly what was going on. "I just don't get how you can hate something that you haven't even finished watching," she laughs. "You put it on once, turned it off halfway and never watched it again." She said. Mindy nodded at that. "Yeah because I didn't like it." She said in an obvious tone. "I thought you knew that," she added. Tara rolled her and turned to look at you. "So what do you think Y/N? Is the Babadook a bad movie like Mindy says?" She asks.

"Oh I've never seen it." You said easily.

Both girls looked at you like you just kicked a puppy. "What?" They asked. "You've never seen it?" You shook your head. "Nope. Never. I'm not a fan of those movies." You said. Mindy was confused when you said that. "What do you mean?"

You shrugged "scary movies. I'm not into them after my cousin made me watch Friday The 13th when I was twelve and it gave me nightmares for two months." You said. "So I don't watch them."

Tara knotted her eyebrows together as she looks at you with confusion written all over her face. "But you know the Stab franchise," she points out. "So you obviously know horror movies." She argued. You nodded in agreement with that. "Yes I know Stab, but I have never seen Stab." You tell her. "Just because I have heard of something or something is popular enough to talk about doesn't mean that I've seen them," you explained.

"If not horror then what do you like?" Mindy asked.

"Musicals!" You and Sam said at the same time, which made you both giggle.

While Mindy was fake gagging at the cuteness, Tara was looking at her sister. "How did you know that?" She asked. Sam shrugged with a smile on her face. "It's pretty easy to decipher. She practically explodes when a new music is announced." She said. Both Tara and Mindy nodded before turning to you.

"So what is your favorite musical then?" Tara asked.

You smiled "In The Heights." You said easily. "The music and cinematography is amazing! Also Vanessa is the best character with the best voice," you gushed excited. Mindy laughed at that. "Yeah we already knew that. I mean she looks like Sam so of course she's your favorite." She teased, which made you blush.

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Today was a long day for Sam and she was only halfway through her shift at the new coffee shop. She felt like she couldn't catch a break today and it was frustrating. Everything that could go wrong was going wrong and she was angry. People were more rude today and several coworkers of hers unfortunately found out about her father and were using the new information to antagonize her. Today was a bad day and she really couldn't wait to go home.

Taking her break Sam sat alone with her eyes closed as she tries to calm herself down. She was still talking to her therapist and they have been working on ways for her to relax when she's feeling stressed or angry. So far it's working.

After her break things smoothed out for Sam. She felt more relaxed and working was less stressful for her. She still couldn't wait to go home, but for now things were good. She just hopes that they stay that way.

You stood in the kitchen with your phone opened as you repeatedly looked over the recipe you wanted to make. It was a pasta dish and it seems simple enough to make but you still wanted to make sure that you had everything correct that you needed. Cooking was never your strong suit but you tried. However, today was special and you needed everything to go well today. It just had to go well.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Mindy asked.

"Yeah that doesn't seem right." Chad said softly.

You sighed and bowed your head. "Honestly? I'm not even sure anymore." You whispered. Tara gave both Mindy and Chad a look before turning to you. "Y/N, everything is going to be ok. You have the ingredients and I am sure we can find a tutorial on this." She said. Your eyes snapped opened and you quickly grabbed your phone and typed in the recipe. "I think I have an idea."

With things finally coming together you felt way more relaxed and could finally go get ready. Tonight was special and you wanted everything to go perfectly and be perfect. All of this was for Sam and you really hope she likes it.

Walking inside the apartment it was pretty dark. The only thing giving Sam any light was the two candles on either end of the table. They sat by two plates that was loaded with pasta and a nice salad. It was really cute!

"Sammy! You're home!"

Two arms were wrapped tightly around Sam's body and her face was quickly littered in kisses from her very happy girlfriend. "Hi, baby. Did you do all of this?" She asked. You nodded as you pulled back but never let go. "Yes! I wanted to do something nice for our date night." You tell her.

Sam's eyes lit up when she heard that and without saying anything she kissed you. It was a very needy kiss that was filled with all the love and passion she could muster. She didn't know why but she just felt like she had to show you just how much she loves you. She really loves you.

Pulling away Sam rests her forehead against yours and smiled at you. "This is amazing baby! Thank you." She said softly. You smiled proudly. "You're welcome honey!"

The date was filled with laughter and love as you both shared stories about your day. Sam compliment your food and told you how beautiful you looked, which made you blush as you shyly thanked her. It was a nice night that was crashed by Tara, Chad and Mindy because they wanted you and Sam to watch some new horror movie that was out. Sam was ready to defend you and say no but you decided that you wanted to watch. So you guys did.

You hated the movie but having Sam right next to you, whispering how after you guys would watch that musical you liked made everything better. You and Sam both shared a look that told you each how lucky the other was to have each other. You both knew that the bond you shared was real and the love you had would never go away because you both were head over heels for one another.