#This is like a thousand words I think
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17 year old, CEO Tim Drake canceling a press conference and then putting out a statement like, āSorry for canceling last min, Alfred said that he was going to run my laptop through the dishwasher if I didnāt clean my room. I think heād do it :/. Also, wasnāt really in the mood. Cya -Tim.ā
#I love teen ceo Tim drake so much and heās not even canon#there are a lot of angsty fics and I love them but I think thereās such a potential for comedy#WE employees gain thousands of followers just live-tweeting the insane shit he does every day#āCEO probs not putting out statement about new tech bc I just watched his brother pull him kicking and screaming out of the buildingā#āfound my ceo sleeping in the elevator againā#āhead of R&D just asked me decipher an email at the CEO sent to him. it reads like gen z word saladā#āTim Drake is a wonderful boss. he did just ask me if I wanna see him ollie. it was pretty sickā#Tim drake#ceo tim drake#alfred pennyworth
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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a bit of my postcanon vision
i heart people arguing
#hfjone#bryce hansen#amelia euler#my art#i have beef with post-canon one stuff that just insta-fixes everything without really hashing out how some of these people could#get horrifically angry at each other... not that i think their relationships can or should be ruined forever i would just like to explore#how badly the boys treated amelia IF YOU THINK ABOUUUTT ITTTTTT#sure stone was the one to intentionally exclude her from the team but bryce+liam dont really do much to actually bring her in the loop#even when liam had months and months to tell her. he simply didnt tell her at any point what stone said about the votes being fake#and i dont knowwww i want to see amelia's tendency to lose herself in really maladaptive acceptance butt up against bryce and his like...#eagerness to leave everything behind. You understand me. you get it. anyway i have a few thousand words kicking around that will probably#never be finished or published but trust me I THINK ABOUT IT. A LOT
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my ideal timkon don't get together until they've both already done some queer realizations and dated other guys a little bit, in part because on tim's end, i think he's been in love with kon since he was 17, but at 17 tim didn't even know he was bisexual, forget anything else. and his feelings for kon were so big but also so constant that he didn't even realize they were there or significant because they've always been there and been huge. for years. so he putters along and does his time in the torment nexus (the closet) and languishes a bit but slowly starts to figure it out.
meanwhile kon dates someone, mostly like omg im dating a guy this is ALLOWED !??!?! and its pretty lowkey and casual and doesnt last bc like . super identity issues, right. kon would Never just tell someone, but secrets and casual relationships dont last long etc etc. but just the entire principle of kon dating someone and then being like yeah idk im not really feeling it like hes nice and all but i think hes more interested in likeā¦ yknow, my hot bod, than me. its whatever tho. and tim just being SOOOOO mad that someone would date kon and not absolutely adore him. tim will not be unpacking why hes so mad about kon having a shitty boyfriend. obviously its just bc kons his bestie and deserves better. (š¶)
so he's just grouchily tinkering on some upgrade for his car to get the grumpy energies out. like WHATEVER! (angrily turns socket wrench) he's not saying kon should dump the guy or anything (angrily turns socket wrench) but he's just SAYING, kon can do BETTER!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) and kon DESERVES better!!! kon deserves someone who will treat him RIGHT!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) like if TIM was gonna fuck kon he wouldn't do it like a goddamn quickie and just fucking leave (angrily grabs the next size socket and scoots further under the car) like kon OBVIOUSLY doesn't like that so why won't this guy GET THAT!!!! (angry tinkering noises) if he's that shallow he can go find himself a sexy body pillow to screw!!! leave kon alone!!!!
and cassie sitting on a chair nearby is just like. sorry what was that? "if i was gonna fuck kon"? did you just say--hey tim? hey. can you go back a step?
and tim's just. obviously this is a hypothetical everyone considers about kon. look at him he's . you know. besides, tim's just talking as his best friend who wants the best for him! ugh stop trying to read into it cassie, that's not the POINT--
#rimi talks#cassie: only one of us HAS fucked kon and yet somehow *i'm* not the one who's ever started a sentence with ''if i was gonna fuck kon''.#like i'm just saying tim. i HAVE fucked kon. and i have Never Once said those words in that order. fascinating huh?#tim (rolling out from under his car to give her the most withering look imaginable): oh so you're saying you think that's fine then?#like you Wouldn't do better than this guy?#cassie: literally not at all what i'm saying but also DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF--#the narrator: tim would not admit he's bisexual for another 5 months.#a few days later dick finds him on a rooftop brooding so so so hard and goes yeah bud??#and tim with the most thousand yard stare in the world is like. i think cassie was right about something. but i'm not telling you what#timkon#its important to me that tim is kind of stupid. you get that right#he's stupid and cassie is his bestie who means the world to him and also IS going to point and laugh at him for this for the next 4 years#tim#kon#cassie
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So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
1) He thinks heās so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesnāt know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
2) He thinks heās so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesnāt know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily,Ā but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
10) Heās always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesnāt really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesnāt, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
16) Heās the closest thing to a brother Iāll ever have.Ā If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
17) Heās so good and Iām not. I'm afraid Iām bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
18) Heās better than me, and itās kind of a relief because I know no matter what heāll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
19) In my head heās the responsible one.Ā (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
22) I trust him.Ā When Iām losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
25) Heās always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when heās falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Timās POV, not Dickās. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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We want to destroy my mother. (insp by @dadrielle)
#critical role#criticalroleedit#imogen temult#liliana temult#laura bailey#matthew mercer#gifs#*#*cr#cr3#cr spoilers#angst tag#cr meta#*meta#scheduled#3h12m c3e88#18m c3e12#3h17m c3e42#3h42m c3e51#4h20m c3e51#1h35m c3e49#i think this gifset might be a little bit unfair to liliana from a third party perspective but#i think it's Very Real for imogen. to feel like she reached out so many times and the loyalty there was so fucking flimsy#barely there to begin with and then gone in an instant as everything turned to red mist#thinking about how laura on 4sd a while ago said imogen is so fucking sick of it she's sick of having that hope#her reality is that her mother no longer has any loyalty to her and the pain of thinking she does isn't worth it anymore#:((((#'help me.' 'this is for the best.' breaks my H E A R T :(((((((((#and matt's fucking Smile afterward. speaks a thousand words#thanks rj for the discord message that kicked this off!!!
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it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.
yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.
it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.
how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.
chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?
how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.
"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.
i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.
#writeblr#warm up#i can't write rn but i have SO much words in here bc im reading the chorus of dragons books#(just started book 4)#and this woman's writing is just LIVING in my brain. let me out!!!#(i read roughly like 2-4 books a week usually bc i go on long walks with my dog but when a book is REALLY good like. it eats my life. )#anyway ...... so like here's a story that idk i've tried to explain to other people as being wild#but maybe im the only one who thinks it is wild???#so i play pokemon go (i just started in jan) bc i love pokemon and as i have mentioned i walk goblin for like an hour in the morning#and i don't like a lot of fitness trackers due to the fact it makes me .sad. but i also wanted the little digital rewards. enter pokemon go#anyway so they make you make friends to complete quests. so i used a reddit thread. i do not usually use reddit. i don't have an acct#i lurked. i just googled like ''pokemon go reddit '' and randomly added a bunch of numbers#i was on that page for all of 15 minutes. there are THOUSANDS of responses on that page.#here's what's wild: in that group of people. even though i am not on reddit and it was one random event once#it turns out one of those people lives in the town i live in. or at least very close. i only know this because#when we send each other gifts. it's from the same freaking area.#i can't ask them to meet up bc pokemon go doesn't have a messaging app lol but like . what are the fucking chances that#a random person posts in a random reddit thread and HAPPENS to get added by someone ELSE from their SAME TOWN#who by pure fucking CHANCE is ALSO playing pokemon go and looking for friends#i googled it there's only 42000 people in my broad region. the .......... smallness ! of the world!!!
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š§øš¤ļøš„āļøš¤
#my art#camp camp#cc max#cc david#dadvid#i miss them so much#i think they like this little life ā¦.#no but seriously i just love drawing the most mundane situations w them#the little details can speak a thousand words..#especially with dadvid#itās so easy w them.. they just love the simple things together :]#runs to spotify to play sweet nothing by taylor swift
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wait, how do you think jannik being uncomfortable with carlos makes their dynamic more interesting? you've piqued my interest
i meanāit's scary, right? someone whose mere presence exerts such a strong force on your life, someone who elicits so much from you. whether you want them to or not.Ā
carlos says he's the best player on tour. carlos says he wishes they were closer. carlos makes him play some of his best tennis. against carlos he has to play his best tennis. against carlos his best tennis might not be enough. carlos could stand between him and what he wants. carlos saw who he would be before anyone else did. carlos is a contradiction. carlos is a threat. carlos is a promise.Ā
none of this is comfortable or relaxing. carlos is NOT safe, these feelings are not safe. they're alarming and unsettling and overwhelming and electrifying but they're definitely not safe.
#accidental sincaraz manifesto??#it's not that i think this dynamic is inherently preferable to the one that compels op#witness the literally tens of thousands of words both fictional and non that i've expended on a ship that boils down to you feel like home#but in this instance... it's extra tasty#sincaraz#ask
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You are eight years old
You have to kill your dad
#ninjago#watched child's play again#fucking DIED#YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW LLOYD IS LIKE EIGHT??? TEN??? HE'S A C H I L D#fair isn't a word where i come from YOU'RE A KID#GOD YOU'RE A KID#im in physical pain#kai smith#kai jiang#kai ninjago#lloyd garmadon#lloyd ninjago#person who tagged something#lloyd jiang#you understand me#kai and lloyd do you mean#you never wanted to be the green ninja and your brother wants so badly to take it from you so you get the chance to be a child#the way he never did because he had to raise his sister as well as himself#and in you he sees the wrongs done to him but a thousand times worse#because you're not just losing your childhood#you have to kill your dad#GOD IM SO NORMAL#kai wanted to be the green ninja. he still wants to be the green ninja. but not for himself. so that Lloyd doesn't have to carry the weight#of a destiny he never wanted#lloyd wants to give kai the green ninja so that he doesn't have to be the savior or the chosen one or the guy who's going to kill his dad#and he can't#theyre so sad#my art#essays in the tags again
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I'm sorry but some of you only know like 2 words and one of them is divorce
#we need to start expanding our vocabularies. gempearl can only divorce so many hundred and thousand times#the one ship I think actually justifies itself being labelled a divorce constantly is ethubs#blabber#sorry Im just thinking like if I filtered the word divorce then at least half the gempearl posts on this site would just disappear#I joke I jest.... but at the same time I do feel like a bit of this deeply interesting dynamic worthy of 500 essays gets lost
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how do the jack manifold daily mods all feel about the 2024 c!jack lore
yeah pretty good
#āI think if we tried to answer with words it would be a multi-thousand word essayā from the mod chat#let me tell you. there have been time when i went to bed and i come back with 5 channels having over 150 messages in them#and theyre all like. paragraphs.#other mods feel free to reblog with actual thoughts or links to your own posts discussing thoughts :3#mod pep#jasks and manswers#not art
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'my cousin is all stomach and no heart' is such a funny thing for illario to tell rook if he maybe is picking up on a little bit of a Vibe going on there. the 'LMAO. well good luck with that friend. better hotties than you have tried and failed and dashed themselves against the legendarily unamorous cliffs of my cousin's complete obliviousness and lack of interest to no avail. (optional 'may I suggest a more hah-hem *undoes another few buttons on his shirt that thing is open almost to his navel now it's borderline obscene* available dellamorte for your consideration. I mean if you're like in the market for one anyway' devious undertone as you see fit)' energy is off the charts.
(illario is above all a funny petty bitch and that's why I love him so indescribably. no no lucanis is right we need him around to drop shade like this he is in fact also an essential crow. we all contribute in our own ways)
#also I need to see his face when he realizes that lucanis IS in fact fucking that weird little goth twink. On The Regular and w enthusiasm#'of ALL the people who've thrown themselves at you over the years THIS is what you go for?? 'festooned in skulls' is your thing???'#(lucanis' thing is emotional security and safe sincere enduring affection but I don't think illario could grasp that in a thousand years)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#illario dellamorte#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#I actually think the writing as it stands for illario could work really well if the voice direction had been better#the voice actor is using such an obvious aggro Ze Evil Voice tone the whole way through I think if he was more soft-spoken#and more seemingly good-naturedly jocular and sometimes vulnerable the actual words work well enough to add some subtlety#(I mean. not a lot of subtlety. it's not like you'd wonder who the traitor is and I frankly don't think you're really meant to#that's not the point. it's a car crash you have to watch. but it would make the emotional tone a bit different and more compelling)#between that and some of the environmental storytelling -- the burned letter from zara even though the whole house is FULL#of venatori there's really no point in like. hiding evidence at this point lol vs. the one he wrote lucanis lying neatly on a table#in the same room -- the fact that he can't bring himself to hurt caterina. he seems to be staying in the room across the hall from her.#you know there are some signs here that just maybe#lucanis' hopes for him are not as completely incomprehensibly delusional as it looks on the surface haha
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Chilcille huh... ngl I was a little suspicious. like why would you do that, huh... hope youre not mischaracterizing anyone in your weird and wacky ship. a little weird. but then you said they both had flat asses and you know what? I salute you and your perfect characterization
The fact you seem to think you managed to not make this ask insulting is baffling. What the hell. Fuck off.
If you actually care to be open minded about the ship, I talk about marchil on my sideblog 24/7. Funnily enough Iām currently 4k words deep into an analysis of their character arc together in canon, but thatāll take some more days to get done. Some notable posts:
Of course without counting the analyses of Chilchuck on his own Iāve made, like my masterpost on his family situation. Or better yet you could also read my fics for them, see how weird and wacky they are here.
Wanna talk about mischaracterisation? Theyāre literally a comedic duo who interacts 24/7. Marchil is crazy bc ppl are like "did those shipper read with their eyes CLOSED?? They have no chemistry!" Meanwhile canon is like: "Sheās obsessed with knowing everything she can about him and she reads him like a book." In her eyes heās like that extra rare and hard and shiny unlockable dating sim character, that brooding mysterious character trope thatās thrilling to crack open and typically is at the center of the plot. The wife roleplay???? "Hey, did you know his type is blondes. Hey did you know he likes his women pretty and blonde. Hey did you know he likes her hair. Hey did you know that he teases her 24/7 and itās one of the few things that consistently gets him grinning because he finds her reactions cute." Like a schoolyard bully pulling on the pigtails of the girl he likes.
Itās not like they have any thematic narratives or relevance. Itās not like sheāll live to 1000 and has existential dread about it while heās logically gonna be her next friend to die at 50 and wether itās romantic or platonic itāll terrify her to lose him. Itās not like itās fear of death x fear of rejection so theyāre both obsessed with the thought of loss looming, past and ongoing. Itās not like itās half-elf x half-foot and thereās an inherent journey that was and still is to dispel prejudices and truly come to see each other. Itās not like heās painfully real and raw and flawed but still a good man, that heās not the figure of prince charming that sheās always dreamed of while still being virtuous and worth fighting for. Or you know, her hair being golden and it being the epitome of beauty to him, and his hair turning silver and it being Marcilleās worst nightmare.
Just a weird wacky ship who means nothing but shallow things to people who have weirdo reasons for liking it. Like can you not. If youāre not imaginative enough to think of reasons why this ship may have an appealing dynamic thatās not my issue. But yes, yes, theyāre both flat asses to me, thanks.
#Dungeon meshi#Ask#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Marcille donato#chilchuck tims#Marchil#You me the parking lot after i finish and post my arc analysis#Sobbingā¦ā¦ā¦ weāre 20 over here in the rarepair pit come on. Like do u not see how obsessed i am. Do u think they like. Mean nothing to me#Do u think itās all incidental and i slipped and the 10 thousands of words I write for them had no thought or feelings behind them or#Their arc is so beautifuuuuul they come to see each other and her standards become more real while he allows hope and openness#Into his heart again šš not the way two of their scenes lowkey read as a proposalā¦#Anyways I hope this makes it clear Iāll fight to my dying breath for them.#I donāt want trouble and i imagine you donāt either so just donāt come shitting on my doorstep#In positive news my fic Grind Me Down Sweetly recently reached 100 likes and 1k hits <3 it can also be read as just platonic so if you like#Them as a duo even as friends give it a shot#Every time I see someone shitting on marchil I start making marchil content faster btw#Not art#Unstoppable force x immovable object my beloved. They need someone stubborn loving methinks. One who loves stubbornly and one who confronts
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uhhh sketchdumps AGAIN bcs i had to get them out of my system after this busy ass week
also hiii new mkulia redesigns dropped ^_^!!
#my art#total drama#tdi 2023#td mk#total drama mk#tdi mk#td julia#total drama julia#tdi julia#mkulia#td mkulia#total drama mkulia#i rlly wanna draw all the tdi cast as dramaeama but#i also need to do like a thousand rhings n im soo overwhelmeed!!! iii#m gnna finish intertwined chapt 4 this weekend ;;;;; i think im like 6k words in now??#ughhh i hate everything#BUT hopefully u guys like this new style cause i sure do!!^_^
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father to father.
(additional art under the cut)
#my art#fanart#inside no 9#steve pemberton#reece shearsmith#the trolley problem#yes iām drawing this episode again#iāve written thousands of words of analysis about it and i still canāt decide if i think itās good or not#either way iām obsessed with it#the text in these pieces are lyrics to a wolf at the door by radiohead#itās *their* song#also whilst iām here feel free to send asks or msgs about my art#or in9 in general#i like to hope i come off as approachable
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