#There is the secret second option that involves me talking to the admin of the already existing daily frost blog

[zalgoid]

I was being autistic about Frost cause what else would I do. And my beloved boyfriend said I should make one of those daily post blogs which I think is hilarious because

1. I probably could at this rate

2. If I did frost would have not one but two daily post blogs dedicated strictly to him while the others have none

[noona-clock]

Happier - Part 2, Final Chapter

Thank you to @chenline for helping me with the plot AND for being so patient! I’m sorry it took me a while!!

Genre: AU/Kind of angsty

Pairing: Jaebum x You

By Admin B

Part 1, 2

You and Jaebum had been dating secretly for three months now.

The night you had “gone out for ice cream with Jackson,” you both had decided your feelings for each other were too strong. But you knew your mom could never find out, so really the only option was to lie. Except you hated lying. But you loved Jaebum more. So you came to the conclusion you were simply ‘not talking about it’ rather than ‘lying.’

You enlisted the help of your newest friend, Jackson, although you did feel kind of guilty for making him your cover-up.

“Of course I’ll do it!” Jackson had exclaimed. “I’m very good at making up elaborate stories.”

You had thanked him profusely, and you’d promised him you would go on friend dates with him to repay your debt.

Now, three months later, you thought things were going pretty smoothly.

Whenever you went to meet with Jaebum, you told your mom you would be with Jackson. On your way out of the house, you would text Jackson with your secret code: “I’m on my way, handsome!” This way, if your mom ever snuck a peek at your phone, she wouldn’t get suspicious.

You also invited Jackson over to your house sometimes because you knew your mom would bug you about it if you didn’t. Jackson did a wonderful of job of acting like your boyfriend whenever he came for dinner, and he really was a big reason why your mom never found out you were actually seeing Jaebum.

You were currently at Jaebum’s apartment, snuggled on the couch listening to DefSoul’s latest recording. He had written a song about you named “Don’t Worry,” and he wanted you to be the first (besides his bandmates) to hear it.

“Have I ever told you that you have the sexiest voice I’ve ever heard?” you asked, tilting your head to look up at him.

You saw his cheeks flush and a shy smile pull at his lips. “Yes, you have.”

“Well, it’s true,” you grinned, placing a soft kiss on his jaw.

Jaebum pulled you closer to his chest, lazily running his fingers up and down your arm.

The song played about five times before you let out a sigh.

Jaebum knew this was your way of letting him know you were about to leave. Whether or not you did it on purpose, he had figured out quickly you always let out a sigh before you told him you had to go.

“I need to go study,” you said as you reluctantly sat up. “Finals start next week.”

“But then you only have two semesters left,” Jaebum pointed out.

“Thank god.” You weren’t sure how much longer you could last.

“We’ll celebrate when you’re done with all of our exams.” Jaebum followed you as you stood from your spot on the couch, shuffling over to grab your purse on his kitchen counter.

“Any ideas?” you asked, a smirk pulling at your lips as you felt his arms snake around your waist from behind.

“Yeah, I’ve got some,” he murmured, attaching his lips to your neck.

“If you keep doing that, I’ll never leave,” you giggled.

“And that’s supposed to make me stop?”

“Jaebum,” you whined, turning around in his hold and looping your arms around his neck. “I really need to study. If I don’t get good grades, I’ll have to take the classes over again, and that’ll delay graduation.”

Jaebum opened his mouth to rebut, but he stopped himself. You were right. And you finishing school was what both of you were waiting for.

“I know, I’m right,” you smirked. “As always. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“All right,” he sighed, leaning in for one more kiss before finally letting you go.

You thought of Jaebum your whole drive home, as you always did, so you were in a particularly good mood when you arrived at your house. You could still feel his lips on your neck, his arms around your waist... If you didn’t have to study, you would turn around, get back in your car, and drive right back over to his place.

You smiled all the way up your walkway, humming softly to yourself as you unlocked the front door and stepped inside.

“Mom, I’m --” 

You usually called out to let your mom know you were home, but tonight, she was already waiting for you. And your smile fell. Because she looked angry.

“Where have you been?” she asked, her voice low and even. Which was a very bad sign.

“...With Jackson, like I told you,” you answered immediately.

“Oh? Then why did I just speak with his father who was at dinner with him?”

“...Because they went out to dinner after I left.”

“I asked about you,” she told you. “His father seemed to have no idea what I was talking about. He told me Jackson wasn’t dating anyone.”

“Well...” you gulped. “He should probably be more involved in his son’s life, then.”

“Why have you been lying to me?”

Oh, great. Once your mom accused you of lying, there was no turning back. She knew. So you simply stayed silent.

“Who are you really seeing, Y/N?”

“Mom, please just --”

“Who? That musician, isn’t it?”

“His name is Jaebum,” you retorted sternly.

“I knew it. Honey, I have told you before, you have no future with a musician.”

“But he’s not just a musician, mom! He’s Jaebum! His career doesn’t define him!” you cried.

“But it defines his bank account! And you can’t be truly happy if you��re struggling to put food on the table!”

“It’s not like I’ll never have my own job! Once I graduate, I’ll --”

“But that’s just it! You’re still in school! And you’re living under my roof, so you follow my rules. You’re breaking up with him.” Her eyes were ice as she crossed her arms over her chest, eyebrows raised as she dared you to challenge her.

You stared right back, swallowing down the lump in your throat.

“I can’t!” you blurted out. “I love him!”

“Then you have no place here.”

“Wh--”

“If you choose him, you’re no longer welcome in this house.”

“Mom, that’s not fair!” you yelled, tears pooling in your eyes.

“Life isn’t fair, honey! You don’t always get what you want, and that’s just how it is! You either complain about it or you get used to it!”

“But Jaebum is not just something I want!” you exclaimed. “I love him! You remember what it’s like to love someone, right?”

“Don’t get sassy with me,” your mom snapped. “I already told you the deal. You either break up with him or you find another place to live.”

“Well, I’m not breaking up with him,” you sniffed.

“Get out then!”

“FINE!” You turned on your heel, nearly ripping the front door off its hinges as you swung it open and marched back to your car.

You somehow managed to make it back to Jaebum’s house, your tears and anger clouding your vision as you drove. You barely remembered pulling into his apartment complex, walking up the stairs, knocking on his door. 

“Hey, what happened?” Jaebum asked gently the second he saw you, pulling you into his arms and holding you tightly.

“My mom found out,” you sobbed, burying your face in his neck. “She said I either had to break up with you or find another place to live.”

“Ah, fuck,” Jaebum murmured.

“What am I supposed to do? I still have two semesters left. Where am I going to live, how am I going to pay my tuition? That’s, like, 20 thousand dollars!”

You felt Jaebum freeze momentarily before putting his hands on your shoulders and pushing you away so he could see your face.

“Wait, you -- what do you mean? What are you talking about?”

Your brow furrowed deeply as you gazed up at him with bleary eyes. “Jaebum, of course, I chose you. I made that mistake once, I’m not making it again!”

You were almost offended he thought you wouldn’t pick him.

He pulled you back to his chest, wrapping his arms around you tightly and rubbing your back. “It’ll be okay,” he assured you. “We’ll... we’ll figure this out.”

Just as you were about to respond, your phone began to ring. You slid it out of your pocket, a wave of relief washing over you when you saw Jackson’s name.

“Y/N, I am so, so, so sorry,” he pleaded before you could even say ‘Hello.’ “Your mom found out, didn’t she? And it’s all my fault. Oh, god, she probably kicked you out of the house. Right?”

You let out a breath, still holding onto Jaebum with your free arm. “Yeah.”

“Listen, come live with me. My dad just signed the lease on a brand new apartment, it’s got three bedrooms, you won’t have to pay for anything.”

“Jackson, what?” you laughed. “Come on, don’t be absurd.”

“I’m not! I’m totally serious! It’s mostly my fault your mom kicked you out, I feel responsible! Let me make it up to you. I’m not going to stop bothering you until you say ‘yes,’ please, Y/N, I’m your friend just let me do this I promise I’ll be the best roommate I won’t bother you unless you want me to and you’ll have your own space and it’s close to your school and we’ll --”

“Okay!” you cried, only to make him stop. “Fine, fine, fine.”

“...Really?”

“We’ll talk more later, okay? I’ll call you.”

“Okay, and listen you won’t regret --”

You shook your head as you hung up, chuckling softly at Jackson’s antics.

“...What was that all about?” Jaebum asked, his voice low.

“It was just Jackson offering me a place to live. He just got a new apartment, and he’s trying to take responsibility for my mom finding out.”

“...Well, you told him ‘no’ right?”

You quirked a brow up at your boyfriend. “Well, not exactly.”

“Why not? You’re not going to say ‘yes’ are you?”

“Well... I mean, why shouldn’t I?”

“Because you’re moving in here with me!”

“What?! Jaebum, since when?!”

“Since... now.”

“So, you just decided without asking me?” you scoffed.

“Well, no, but -- I mean, you’d rather live with Jackson than with me?!”

“It’s not that,” you sighed. “Can you just give me some time to think, at least?”

Jaebum let out a humorless chuckle, and you felt your anger rising again. “What is there to think about? I’m your boyfriend, you should move in with me.”

“DON’T TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO,” you yelled, letting your emotions take over. “You’re no better than my mom!”

And before he could say anything else, you stormed out yet another door.

Not even an hour later, you found yourself at Jackson’s place, and you resolved to stay there - at least for the night. You didn’t want to leave anywhere else again for the time being.

Jackson, bless his soul, sat there and listened as you poured your heart out. Honestly, you never really thought him capable of listening since he talked so much, but he was surprisingly attentive. And once you’d finished your emotional rant, he said the one thing you’d been wanting to hear: “Well, what do you want?”

“I want to be with Jaebum, I want to finish school, and I... I don’t know. I don’t know how I’m going to afford everything. I need to find a job, I guess.”

“Hey, what about the scholarship?” Jackson queried, eyebrows raised.

“What scholarship?”

“You know, the one my dad’s company offer - your mom’s company.”

“Oh, right...” You’d completely forgotten. “Well, my mom said I didn’t need to sign up for it because she paid for everything.”

“So, sign up for it now. I’ll talk to my dad, he’ll understand. And, seriously, you can live with me. free of charge. I’m living there free of charge, so it’s not a big deal at all.”

“You... you would really do that for me?”

“Of course,” Jackson assured you, reaching out to take your hand. “You’re my friend.”

“And... you wouldn’t mind if Jaebum comes over?”

“Of course, not. As long as... you don’t mind if Rose comes over.” He was having a very difficult time keeping a smirk from his lips as you let out a gasp.

“What?! Who’s Rose?!”

“This girl I’ve been seeing... It’s nothing serious, just...” He shrugged, and you squealed when you saw his cheeks flushing.

After you’d calmed down enough to speak rationally, you called Jaebum to apologize. He did first, though, and you could tell he was pretty upset at how things had gone at his place.

You explained you truly appreciated his offer to let you move in with him, but you were going to decide for yourself. And the best decision right now was to get the scholarship from your mom’s work and live with Jackson. It was closer to your school than Jaebum’s place, and it was rent-free (as much as you would feel like a squatter mooching off your best friend, it was too tempting to pass up).

Jaebum relented, but you knew it was only because he felt guilty for upsetting you. You didn’t care, though. You were tired of people trying to make decisions for you, so you were making this one on your own, no matter what.

It didn’t take you long to get settled into Jackson’s brand new, very nice apartment, though it took a bit longer for Jaebum to get used to the idea of you living with another guy. Once he actually spent time with Jackson, though, his worries diminished. He knew you well enough to know Jackson, while an amazing guy, was not your type. You preferred the strong, silent kind of guy - which was why you were currently with Jaebum.

Plus, the fact Jackson now had a girlfriend made it easier for Jaebum to accept your choice. The four of you went on multiple double dates, and Jaebum eventually even came to like Jackson.

To be honest, you spent your last two semesters of school happier than you’d ever been. You were openly dating the man you loved, you were living with your best friend, and you were acing your classes since you had enough time to study. Sure, you weren’t talking to your mom at all, but... honestly, who needed a dictator for a parent?

You certainly didn’t.

Three years later

“Babe, I’m not coming with you,” Jaebum chuckled, shaking his head as you set your chin on his shoulder.

“Why not?! Only Jackson and Rose are coming, I feel lame just bringing two people!” you pouted.

“Why not? Because I don’t want to see you in your wedding dress until you’re walking down the aisle,” he explained. “Call me old-fashioned, but I want to be surprised.”

You sighed deeply, pressing your lips briefly against the back of his neck. “Okay, fine.”

“...Why don’t you call your mom?”

“You know why. She wouldn’t come. We haven’t spoken for three years.”

“Maybe... you should at least try.”

“I’ll see you later, okay?” You grabbed your purse from the kitchen counter, successfully avoiding the subject. You didn’t need your mom to come with you to pick out your wedding dress. You’d planned the rest of the wedding yourself (with some input from the groom, of course), so you certainly didn’t need her help now.

You met Jackson and Rose outside of the bridal shop, your heart racing as you stepped inside.

But then it dropped into your stomach when you saw her.

“...What are you doing here?” you asked, breathless.

“Jaebum called me a while ago,” your mom explained, stepping forward. “He... thought I wouldn’t want to miss this.”

You gulped down the lump in your throat, trying not to break down. “Well, you’ve missed everything else,” you replied bitterly.

“I know, and... I regret it. I’m not proud of anything, Y/N,” she admitted, her eyes filling with tears as she reluctantly reached for you. “I’m sorry. I know you have no reason to forgive me, but... Even though I’m your mom, I’m still human. I make mistakes.”

You stared at her, your forehead wrinkled as you tried to think of what to say. But you honestly couldn’t form words at the moment.

“Please,” she pleaded. “I don’t want to miss out on anything else. I know how much I hurt you, and I plan to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Because you’re still my baby. You always will be.”

Apparently, those were the words you’d been waiting to hear for three years now because you almost immediately broke down. Tears streamed down your face as your mom took you into her arms, stroking your hair and crying right along with you.

You had no idea how you would repay Jaebum for what he’d done. He had known you needed your mom back, even though you hadn’t.

And that was exactly why you were marrying him.

Master list //  RULES // Submit a Request! // Read About the Admins

[fabletonrp]

RP Rules Review and Being Considerate - A (Long) General Information post

I think the time has come to post something like this as a reminder about how to deal with people.  It’s no great secret I’m a little older than most people involved in roleplay, and with that advanced age comes a slightly different perspective on how to interact with others.  Before I really begin, I would like to stress that I have a lot of work experience interacting with people, face-to-face and over the phone/internet, who are happy, who are angry, and who are experiencing profound tragedy.  I’m not a social worker, I’m not particularly warm and fuzzy by nature, and I’m only minimally trained in a formal way.  My interactions are governed by experience, common sense, and a desire to ultimately be effective over being nice.  

However, this doesn’t mean I take free reign to be rude.  That also applies here.  I’m not trying to be rude. I also loathe passive-aggression to a pathological degree.  I’m just trying to share my own experiences in a context and provide a guideline for interacting with other people in a specific place -- in this case, a roleplay. I’m trying to outline what I look for in managing this group and how it informs the things I say to roleplay members who come to me for whatever reason they choose.  As you all know, my metaphorical door is always open.  I’ve happily worked through a number of interaction issues and I have no problem working through more when the need arises.  I also have no problem cheering people on, in their lives or in character. That’s the kind of stuff I’m here to do and I know that.  I’m not posting this to say I’m better than anyone else.  It’s just a way for me to share what I’m looking at when I’m dealing with complaints about how interactions happen, and a place to outline how I do it so you can hold me accountable for it.    

With that introduction and explanation out of the way, I’d like to start with explaining my perspective on an important difference.  This article, by a school counselor with extensive training on the topic and a lot of written force behind that, is my basis for it.  

When I guarantee a ‘safe’ environment here, what does that mean to you?  

To me, it means I won’t tolerate my members being spammed with inappropriate, frequent, or aggressive messages, whether in character or out of character.  This constitutes harassment.  

To be harassment, it has to be systematic. The only thing I can recommend to stop anonymous harassing messages is limiting the avenues they’re received.  For off-anon messages, if I look into it and agree that it’s bullying or harassing, the guilty person gets one conversation in which they are most likely removed from the group.  

What it doesn’t mean is writers will be comfortable all the time.  Especially in a roleplay like this with darker themes, there may be content that is objectionable to some.  That’s why we trigger tag.  Blacklisting is always an option, too.  Characters may not be liked or loved.  Someone else’s perception of your character may not be a positive one. 

It doesn’t mean disagreements won’t happen.  It doesn’t mean you won’t hear the word ‘no.’  It also doesn’t mean assumed priority or rank.  Every character and every plot has a sliding degree of importance based on scale.  In the end, we do not have a main character.  The biggest plot points are outlined on the main roleplay page.  With over a hundred characters, there will be different plots overlapping one another all the time.  With around 20 roleplayers at any given time, there will be different opinions, backgrounds, and needs to balance out.  

A safe environment doesn’t mean we all agree all the time or feelings won’t be hurt.  It just means a respectful place to work through and resolve differences.  It means no one is ignored if they make the effort to be heard.

I have a zero tolerance policy for hate-filled speech regardless of the avenue someone is being attacked (shape, size, religion, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, etc - my ideas generally follow legal language because of my professional background.)  If someone receives this kind of a message from another member of the group, it is cause for immediate removal and I won’t provide the courtesy of a conversation. 

Gross instances of godmodding or metagaming will not be tolerated.  Smaller and possibly unintentional ones will be discussed.     

If the behavior doesn’t meet the legal and/or widely-accepted definition of these things, the guilty person gets a conversation that I consider a warning they need to consider how they’re treating others.  If the behavior doesn’t stop, they’re removed and blocked.  I don’t have a set timeframe for compliance here because it depends on the circumstance and its severity.

In the article I provided above, though, it splits out the difference between being rude, being mean, and being a bully.  That’s what I’d like to focus on next.  I notice the word ‘bullied’ or ‘bullying�� being tossed around a lot, both in the roleplay context and outside it, so I want to clearly outline what it is here, at least in my mind and in my operation as an admin. I agree with the article in that providing misnomers or using the buzzwords involved, at times, does a disservice to some grave issues.  This is the guideline I’m using now, and will continue to use, so please read through. 

Being rude is inadvertently saying or doing something that hurts someone else.  Not everyone is comfortable, if they feel someone is rude, saying ‘Hey, stop it.’  But the key difference between being rude and being a bully is the intent behind it. 

Example in a roleplay context: “I don’t think that’s how your character would react to that.”  Whether this type of statement, which I’ve seen more than once with different phrasing, is said in an effort to mold the speaker’s in-character interaction a certain way or for another reason, it’s rude.  It’s hurtful because of its implication that you know someone’s character better than they do.  A better, more collaborative approach might be “Tell me what your character was thinking when they said/did that.”   This automatically puts someone into a more creative place, rather than a defensive one. 

As a note, rudeness is something I will generally stay out of as an admin because we’re all adults here.  I’ll rely on you guys to work that out amongst yourselves for the most part. 

Disagreeing with someone is different from being rude.  How it’s managed is the difference.  The Golden Rule totally applies - stop and think about your own feelings or response if you were approached with a certain comment before you make it.

Being mean is a contained instance designed to hurt someone else.  Most of the time, this is inspired by anger and often it can be misdirected anger.  A lot of it is passive-aggressive.  All of it could be controlled or avoided but the person has a clear and willful disregard for the other’s feelings.

Example in a roleplay context:  “Character A hasn’t been around because they don’t care about me.”  This is a mean, planned out, and a passive-aggressive bid for attention if spoken in-character.  It casts your own character in the role of victim to someone else’s actions and casts the other character in a negative light in a way that is easily preventable.  It’s designed to get another roleplayer’s attention in a second-hand way (no direct OOC contact).  It’s also godmodding.  A better example is to place constraints and limit it to your own character’s perception.  “I don’t feel like Character A cares about me.”  This is open-ended enough to allow the other roleplayer to respond without trapping them and dictating where they’ve been or what they’ve done (or where they haven’t been/what they haven’t done.)  

As a note with this specific example, we don’t follow a day-to-day format here.  There are some roleplays that do, so an extended absence on someone’s part is a little more noticeable.  Because of the loose timeframe here, only really defined as ‘present-day’, it’s very easy to headcanon out day-to-day interaction.  

One example I feel comfortable giving is, as Marian’s roleplayer, I’ve discussed with Robin’s roleplayer that, in spite of our insane schedules, the relationship between Robin and Marian is stabilizing over time.  They see each other at home and nothing is remiss.  We’ll write out some of the bigger plot points we had discussed for them and we started a para.  This two-minute conversation literally eliminated the awkwardness and need for in-character meanness and passive aggression.  The important thing is having the two-minute conversation before we post and, trust me, with the two of us, the two minutes was spread out over about 6 hours. 

This is mostly about perception, because being rude and being mean both cause hurt in the receiving party.  The difference is really the degree of intent.  I’m more than willing as an admin to look at comments, posts, or messages and determine a degree of intent or look for patterns.  However, please realize this is a subjective science and it’s based on my own knowledge and friendships with each of you in the roleplay.  I try to talk to everyone and get to know them well, so I do consider each writer here a friend.  

If your feelings are hurt by what someone has said or done, please don’t think I’m defending them if I encourage you to consider that it may have been done from a different perspective.  

As much as I say I’m not a nice person, I don’t think that makes me a mean one either.  I don’t think anyone here is legitimately a mean person -- and the intention to degrade someone else is what makes the difference between being mean and being rude.  I know it can be hard to sort out when you’re the one hurting, but when you approach me I will try to decide if I think there’s a difference.  And I won’t be shy about expressing my opinion.  Even if I think the person is just being rude, not mean, it’s entirely possible I will go kindly ask them to knock it off.

Bullying involves three elements no matter where you look:  intent to harm, a perceived/emphasized power imbalance, and aggressive acts/threats against the weaker party.   It’s a big step up from being mean and, obviously, not all aspects apply to roleplay.  Physical bullying isn’t something we can do. I think the most pervasive kind in a roleplay is relational aggression. It’s kind of tied in with cyberbullying, considering the format, but in a long-running group roleplay, the friendships and connections you build (IC and OOC) are the key to having fun, and relational aggression undermines those.

Example in roleplay context:  “I’m just going to ignore your posts and hope you go away.”  This is an example of shunning or socially isolating someone, which is probably the most hurtful form of bullying in a roleplay because it’s insidious.  Obviously people just do this rather than saying it most of the time.  It goes without saying that not all characters will reply to all starters.  However, it becomes apparent over time when all of one roleplayer’s characters are ignored by another’s.  Things like a refusal to plot, ignoring messages without a clearly stated reason why beforehand, and spamming the dash to push someone else’s thread out of sight all fall into this category.

One example I don’t think people traditionally think of as bullying is bubble roleplaying.  We all have our ships and our favorites -- but please expect me to contact you if I notice you’re only writing with certain roleplayers or characters all the time.  It’s very much relational aggression to ignore plots with connected characters without a respectful explanation.  If you have connected characters in the roleplay, I expect you to have some form of interaction with them.  If you don’t like the connected character, you need to reconsider the role you’re taking on.  It seriously screws other people over and it’s a noticeable, glaring lack of development.  Plus it’s hurtful in an OOC way and makes others/newcomers feel unwelcome.  

I know this is long and detailed.  I had hoped it wouldn’t need to be said, but at this point I think it’s good to have a general reminder so we can avoid the casual indifference that happens once we’ve been established this long.  This isn’t me being passive aggressive and I’m not posting this because of any one thing in particular.  As I said earlier, it’s here so it’s all spelled out and, if you come to me with an issue, you can understand a little better what I’m looking at or how I think about these kinds of things.  It lays out a guideline for what I will do and makes me responsible to do it evenly and fairly.  Please click the heart if you’ve gotten this far so I know you have. It will hopefully also avoid me giving you a shut-down response if I think you’re using buzzwords in an attempt to get my attention (it won’t work.  I’ve seen that tree before.)  My ultimate goal is to keep this a safe place, to keep growing as a family, for as long as we can. I have all the trust in the world that you guys are on the same page as I am with that goal.  I love writing with each of you, even if time doesn’t allow me to do it as often as I would like.  

Thank you for being members here, for giving me your time and attention and turning this into something with a life of its own.  

Thank you for being great.   

~ Admin J

[penumbra-rp]

Becky, you will be playing the role of Narcissa Black! 

A cold intelligence clings to her slender frame. She sits pretty, reapplying lipstick to hide the small smirk that forms upon her mouth when others call her sisters headstrong, daring, and bold, leaving only the sweetest of words for the youngest of the brood. It is all as mother dearest taught her: the trick to being powerful is through well-maintained appearances that distract from a sharp mind.

Admin Ash: I would like to preface by saying that my love for Narcissa Black knows ( zero ) bounds. She’s quite literally the ice queen of my dreams, and the queen of my heart. I have said it once and I will say it once again, Becky, I have not encountered a single Narcissa portrayed with the sheer amount of chilling aloofness and effortless elegance as yours. She’s such a multi-faceted woman ( not that she'd ever allow you to know that about her ), the epitome of looking like the innocent flower but being the serpent under it -- and as she speaks, you can hear the calculation with her every well-strung sentence and deliberate pause. She is the golden girl, prim and proper and perfect, and I can’t wait to see the porcelain crack beneath the weight of her family’s expectations coupled with the darkness overtaking her inner circle. 

01. Out of Character

NAME: Becky

AGE: 23

YOUR BIRTHDAY: 17th January

PRONOUNS: she/her

TIMEZONE: GMT

02. In Character

CHARACTER: Narcissa Black

CHARACTER’S PRONOUNS: she/her

FACECLAIM: Emma Rigby

CHARACTER’S BIRTHDAY: 2nd January

PERSONALITY

[+] Eloquent: She is incredibly well-spoken and knows how to piece together an argument. Being persuasive is a useful skill to have when she plans her life so meticulously, precise in all that she does. Her words are posed with thought, careful and calculated, never one to speak without thinking.

[+] Dedicated: If Narcissa says she will do something, there is very little that will deter her from giving up ( besides being asked to do so by someone superior ), particularly if it involves supporting her family. She stands by ideals and traditions, defending all that she loves with a loyal, icy fierceness. Failure is not an option.

[+] Charming: Being raised on silver spoonfuls of aristocracy, Narcissa knows how to talk the talk. She is something of a people pleaser and has perfected the art of flattery, mirroring what she believes to be the ideal version of herself in the eyes of her conversation partner.

[-] Reserved: Narcissa prefers her own space and certainly doesn’t share her innermost feelings with ease. Openly seeking affection and comfort is considered a show of weakness and, as a Black, she knows better than to let people know when she is hurting.

[-] Cold: Unless you’re considered important by her, you will be met by a politely arched eyebrow and a request that you don’t stand so close. She has very little patience for the scoundrels and troublemakers who could bruise her otherwise pristine reputation and she certainly won’t make much effort to be friendly to them.

[-] Insecure: Don’t be fooled by her facade, Narcissa is plagued by her perfectionist nature and relies heavily on the opinions of others to determine her self-worth. She strives to be the best and won’t settle for anything less, no matter how much she has to sacrifice in the process.

BRIEF BULLET POINT BIO:

Prologue  |  Let it be known that Narcissa Black begins her life as a soft, gentle creature. This is a reminder that ice takes time to form. That children are neither good nor bad, but something in between that teeters on the edge of being both. With shielded smiles and knowing eyes, it is not her but her family who encourage the darkness. Their bloodline are named after stars; they shine through the gloom and know how to cope with it, but she is a flower plunged into a world where she should not thrive. Should not grow. It is for this reason that her life is theirs to mould and shape.

Appearance  |  She’s born with the family’s signature dark hair, glossy and beautiful, a deep brown that matches the mansion’s ebony wood floor. The blond hair dye changes that. Narcissa loves her sisters dearly, but her first week at university is marred by countless people mistaking her for Bella and Andy. Staying out of her siblings’ shadows requires work. It requires a delicate sort of shining; daffodils in the wake of winter. Religiously maintained golden hair catches in the light from then on, paired with a regal posture and a dedication to her appearance that some regard as narcissistic. She makes herself unobtainable. Untouchable.

Family  |  She takes after her mother, that much is clear from a very young age. Her father accepts this without much protest for he has already managed to twist the mind of their eldest daughter into something more lethal, leaving Narcissa to fill her own with the scent of her mother’s perfume and an appreciation for all things expensive. She grows increasingly protective of her, not standing for anyone saying a bad word about the woman she looks up to. Matriarchal instincts are passed on like an heirloom. She is primed, polished, and presented by her parents at every social function available. The darling daughter, the epitome of Sacred 28 society. Her shoulders forget how to relax, too busy carrying the weight of their expectations. She knows that there is a list of things that she must be (pretty, quiet, obedient) and that she cannot fail at this. They offer her up to the press circling in the water as if to prove that everything they touch turns to gold. A cold intelligence clings to her slender frame. She sits pretty, reapplying lipstick to hide the small smirk that forms upon her mouth when others call her sisters headstrong, daring, and bold, leaving only the sweetest of words for the youngest of the brood. It is all as mother dearest taught her: the trick to being powerful is through well-maintained appearances that distract from a sharp mind.

Career  |  Narcissa learns how to sell herself, sell the company, sell the upper-class dream. They’re all the same thing, after all. Nobody is surprised when she’s hired as Director of Marketing – but they do all assume it’s nepotism that got her there. Narcissa makes no comment, well-learned in the fine language of silence. Deeply devoted to her job, just as she is her family and their fashion house, her success in all things is gauged in adoration and social media likes. She harvests each and every one, tending to the comments section of Instagram photos with meticulous care. Each image is created to reflect the epitome of perfection.

Secrets |  Blood looks black at night, a dark expanse pooling across marble floor. She wasn’t supposed to be there. Wasn’t supposed to see that. The motorbike visor concealing the killer’s face flicks up, accompanied by a breathy “Shit.” She takes one more look at the murdered body and turns away, swearing herself to secrecy. Terrible things happen behind closed doors; she has always known this. And if that is what it takes to keep the things she loves, so be it.

Beliefs  |  Narcissa believes in hierarchy. She believes in social ladders and career ladders and corporate ladders and many other ladders, all of which she sits at the very top rung of, looking down. In her mind, status serves to sort the gems from the rocks. And whilst she believes that the Sacred 28 are the elite, she disagrees entirely with the idea of a world without any competition. You can hardly hold onto the title of the best without companies to be compared against.

INTERVIEW:

i. How do you feel about your current occupation?

Their question is regarded with a critical gaze, as is the face of the person who had uttered it. Narcissa is unafraid of silence. She knows it is there that power truly lies. Her answer takes its time to form upon her tongue. “The need to ask that suggests you haven’t made the effort to do any form of background research into me before starting this interview. My current occupation – my only occupation – is the second most important thing to me. The first being my family, which, given the overlap between them and my job, should give you some idea of just how much it means to me.”

ii. What song would you say describes yourself?

The unorthodox question takes her by surprise, although only someone who knew her body language well, who had learnt her cues ( Andromeda comes to mind; Bellatrix and Maya, too ) – the inaudible exhale of air; the slow blink of mascara-lined lashes; the brief parting of her lips – would be able to tell. “I think,” Narcissa begins, prim caution evident in her tone, “that you would get a more accurate answer were you to ask someone else to pick a song to describe me.” It’s an untrue statement, she’s aware as she says it. Nobody knows her better than herself. Nobody ever will if she has any say in the matter. She falls silent, standing without warning to cross the room and take a seat at the baby grand piano ( a birthday gift for her twenty-third ). “I don’t think you’re going to know it.” Fingertips press against the smooth keys, feeling their weight with each touch as she begins, refusing to lift her gaze asthe song drifts into the room.

iii. Does reputation matter to you?

“Absolutely.” The four syllables are firm and polished as they slip from her lips, accompanied by a gentle nod of certainty. Her life is built on a foundation that relies on the importance of stature and prestige. It is, perhaps, her guiding light. Her sole goal. Perfection of character, above all else. “If reputation stopped mattering to people, they would no longer strive to be the best version of themselves. They would lower their standards and risk getting lost amongst the masses of those who think they can do whatever they want and act however they please.” Her mind snags without her permission on thoughts of Sirius, the already poised length of her spine straightening a fraction more. “Nothing good comes to those who refuse to listen to other people’s opinions of them.”

iv. What is your relationship with your parents like?

A flicker of warmth dances across otherwise well-schooled features, fondness creeping into her tone. “I adore my mother. She is strong, and wise, and beautiful. I’ve never looked up to anyone more than I do her.” It has been that way for as long as she can remember; her youngest memory that of racing to keep up with her mother’s high-heeled strides, mimicking the posture of her walk, wanting to be as similar to her as any child does their hero. Reverie shifts to something hollower but no less adoring as Narcissa moves on to her father. “Daddy is a darling and puts up with my sisters and me so patiently. He has also ways been so good to us.” But she loves him for the blood they share and little else, just as he does her. Raising her chin, she allows a sliver of truth to shed its wings and free itself from the self-made cage of her chest. “I just want to make them both proud.”

v. What languages can you speak?

“Deux. French and Latin.” Two is a safe answer. Two is the sort of answer that doesn’t have people questioning whether she is perhaps more intellectually sharp than she would like them to believe. And it’s not necessarily a lie, not when French and Latin are the languages she is most efficient with, the ones she has been speaking for the longest alongside her native tongue. They do not need to know that she has also learnt Mandarin and Spanish, nor that Narcissa Black takes strength from being more than others assume.

vi. If your home was on fire and you could only save one item, what would you choose?

“That’s a horrible thing to ask someone and hardly appropriate.” She looks mildly taken aback, as if merely considering such an event has caused her some form of offence. Being materialistic should mean that she’d cherish the chance to re-furnish after only saving one item, but thought and care has gone into making her shared penthouse suite feel like a home for herself and Maya. “It’s impossible to answer. So I won’t.”

vii. Which Hogwarts University faculty did you study at? The Gryffindor School of Applied Science, the Ravenclaw School of Humanities, the Slytherin School of Social Science, or the Hufflepuff School of Art?

She has always looked good in ivy green; her parents had been sure to make that point when they’d placed the university prospectus down in front of her during breakfast. But it’s not that she hadn’t had a choice, not when her degree is precisely what she has always excelled at. “Slytherin School. I studied Marketing Communications at undergrad.” There’s a pause. The interviewer’s expectation prompts her to add more. “And Graphic Design for my masters.” She doesn’t mention what school that course belonged to. Her father had been all too efficient in getting it erased from her Wikipedia page and her name omitted from online information regarding Hufflepuff School alumni.

vix. What is your social media username?

“Cissablack.” A business card is pulled from her purse and slid in their direction across polished mahogany. Gold accents catch the light, bright against the matte black background. “All one word.”

[swipestream]

Becky Annison Interview – Bite Me!

I have a confession. I really, really like werewolves. Way back in time, I thought Vampire: the Masquerade was neat, but vampires weren’t really my thing. Then someone handed me a copy of the first edition of Werewolf: the Apocalypse (with the paper cover that had the claw marks cut out of it… so cool, but such a poor design decision) and suddenly I wanted into this whole World of Darkness thing. During the 90’s, I spent a couple of years as a Werewolf admin on a World of Darkness MUSH, and when I got to play both Monsterhearts and Urban Shadows, I played werewolves. So yeah, I like werewolves.

Earlier this year, I woke up to a message from fellow Gnome, Senda, asking if I was available to be play in a game for She’s a Supergeek that afternoon. Bleary eyed and not quite awake yet, I said sure. About an hour later, when I was finally awake, I messaged her back and went, “Uh, what’s the game?” “Oh yeah, it’s a game about werewolves and pack dynamics.” OMG. I was so in.

That game was Bite Me!, run by one of the game’s creators, Becky Annison. The game is currently funded on Kickstarter, but there’s still time to get in on it if you’re interested. I recently had the opportunity to talk with Becky about the game and discuss various aspects of the game and it’s creations. And of course, all the werewolfy goodness. AWOOOOOO!

Why Werewolves? What elevates them above other modern monsters?

Werewolves are a personal favourite of mine and have been for a very long time. I’m really taken by the idea of feeling so much closer to your emotions and instincts and having that be your default state.  Extending that idea into ‘what if you couldn’t/wouldn’t hide how you feel’ it is a large part of what led to Bite Me!

The other thing I love most about Werewolves is the Pack. Unlike other monsters, Werewolves have a concept of a close social group, people who understand you.  When you struggle with the monster inside, you aren’t doing it alone and this is really powerful to me.

What were the gaming influences on designing Bite Me! ?

My gaming influences on Bite Me! come from two distinct areas:

The first is all those games I’ve played over the years where people shared some intense emotional experiences with each other at the table.  Those times when we bared a little of our souls to each other and became a little closer as a result.  This aspect of gaming is something I’ve been keen to try and put into a game and a system for a long time and it owes a lot to the earliest games I played where we left the system in the dust and just free-formed our characters late into the night.  I wanted to design a game where you didn’t have to leave the system behind in order to do that role-playing and get that connection.  A game where the system supported it, made it easier, gave it a name and had it as a core element of the experience.

Secondly there are all the games about monsters I’ve played and enjoyed over the years from Monsterhearts to World of Darkness.  I like it best where you can experience characters struggling to reconcile their human and monstrous sides and, for me, Werewolves are the ultimate expression of that.

What were your fiction influences when creating Bite Me! ?

Without a doubt it was the work of writers such as Kelley Armstrong (who made my year by agreeing to be a stretch goal writer for this project), Patricia Briggs, The Silvered by Tania Huff and Teen Wolf the TV show.

All of these have a strong sense of the dramatic potential in the relationships of the Pack and the humans who live adjacent to them. They touch on the issues of control and domination – but it is how those issues intersect and interfere in the relationships of the main characters which is so compelling.  An Alpha is nothing without a Pack – and that symbiotic relationship in werewolf fiction is incredibly fun to explore.

Tell us about the pack dynamics the game is built around?

The game starts with a set of relationship questions.  Each skin gets a question to ask another player – something juicy and messy which sets up a difficult relationship from the start.  For example, the Greypelt (the oldest wolf in the Pack) is asked which Packmate player character they betrayed who hasn’t forgiven them yet.  The Cub (youngest wolf) is asked which Packmate they hero worship and what that Packmate could do to break their trust.

After all the characters and relationships have been created and the culture and Traditions are all agreed, the MC asks one final question.

“Which of you has broken a Tradition and who is keeping their secret?”

Traditions are the laws of the Pack.  Breaking them will involve a punishment like banishment or worse.  This final question sets the stakes really high and is inviting someone to really put themselves in a difficult spot.

These questions do two things.  Firstly, they set up tense relationships from the beginning, giving people great material to use for making the Spill moves (which I talk about further down).  But secondly, they give people Ties on each other.  If you get 4 Ties on someone then you mark experience, but you can also spend Ties to boost your roll when you make a Move against another player.  There are a lot of player v. player Moves in Bite Me! like Dominate, Mauling and Challenge the Alpha.  However, this is not a game where you can steal the party’s treasure at the last minute, backstab the paladin and run off into the sunset.  You are a Pack and whatever you do to a fellow Packmate you need to face the consequences of that in the morning.  The system is built to tempt and encourage people to take actions which will trigger tension and interesting consequences, and then the players can use the Spill Moves to process what happened.

The Pack dynamics are all about creating really interesting fictional starting points and then giving you a set of mechanics which gets you using all that lovely fiction you created.

I find GMing games a stressful business – so I’ve tried to design a game with a lot of self-sustaining action.  If, as GM, you find yourself sitting back and saying nothing for an hour while the players are Spilling all their secrets and feelings then that means the system is working at optimum capacity!

Why PbtA (Powered by the Apocalypse)? What about that specific system spoke to you for creating this game?

PbtA is a very broad framework to work in as a game designer. But some of the most common elements in the system have some really attractive qualities for a Werewolf game.

One of the first things I noticed when I first played Apocalypse World was how the system of Moves gets you into situations where the action cascades out of control hard and fast.  That pacing and sense of control slipping away from you is exactly what I wanted Bite Me! to feel like – that instantly made PbtA attractive to me.

The other thing the Moves and Playbooks do in PbtA is allow you to laser focus your design at a really specific experience.  I wanted my game to recreate the feeling of being in a werewolf Pack and PbtA gives me a toolbox to really hone in on that.

I would say that Principles are a key element of PbtA for me, as they give a clear direction from the designer to the MC on how to run the game to get the best out of it.  So much of our games actually hinge on tacit play culture, trying to transmit that play culture through a text (rather than through playing a game with someone) is hard work.  But the Principles form these giant signposts for play culture to give us a head start.  Bite Me! also has Player Principles to do the same thing for the players and point them at the play styles to give them the best experience.

Lastly (as if that wasn’t enough!) there is the dice mechanic and the strong hit, weak hit and miss breakdown. On a strong hit the players get a massive success and get to feel like the badass Werewolves they are.  On a weak hit they get what they want but with consequences, and those consequences allow the MC to press on the existing tense relationships and untenable situations (key elements of running Bite Me!) or even create new ones.  Lastly, on a miss the MC can bring out the array of threats that the players have created, press the Pack really hard to get them to unify against a common foe, or in rare circumstances have a Werewolf completely lose control.  Living on the knife edge of control in a violent and threatening world is a staple of the Werewolf genre.  The ever-present possibility you could Miss a roll means those threats are always in the back of a player’s mind! You live with the risk that things will get out of control. The MC’s job is to tempt the players into taking that risk.

Tell us about the character options available to the players?

Bite Me! Has 7 skins and I’ll give you a little detail on each below:

The Alpha – this is the skin for people who want the sense of responsibility for the Pack and drama and hard choices that come with that. This skin is all about trying to keep a fragmenting Pack together and protect them from outside threats. The skin Moves of the Alpha often augment and support the other skins.  The Pack is stronger when there is a player as Alpha.

The Howl – The Howl looks after the spirit of the Pack as the Alpha takes care of their bodies.  This skin has Moves concerning prophecy and rituals of flesh and blood. They can be a loyal adviser to the Alpha or a rival (hopefully both!) but the knowledge they have gained through their rites has created a rift in the Pack, a wound which needs healing.

The Prodigal – this is the skin for people who love drama. You are freshly returned to the Pack after leaving, perhaps through your own choice, perhaps not. The Prodigal has a healing Move (which comes at the price of a second messy relationship!) and is harder to dominate due to their time away from the pack dynamic.

The Enforcer – This is a skin for people who want to explore the conflict between protecting those they love with violence and feeling that as a guilty burden. You have Moves which allow you to put yourself in the place of an endangered Packmate, but you can also dominate others more easily through doing something unacceptable and crossing a line.

The Cub – not everyone is an experienced werewolf, someone has to be the pup of the Pack and that is the Cub. This character has been a Werewolf for not more than a year (although they will likely be a fully grown adult) and their skin is all about being indulged, given a free pass when they break the rules and ensuring that the other Packmates will always get them out of whatever mess they end up in.

The Fixer – This character is for someone who wants to be torn between the human and wolf worlds and loves to live in both.  The war inside them will affect their relationships and yet it is often necessary for the Pack’s survival that the Fixer walks this line.  The Fixer’s Moves involve getting information out of the human world, making problems disappear and using resources that the rest of the pack don’t have access to.

The Greypelt – The Greypelt is the oldest member of the Pack and probably is a parent or grandparent to many of them.  They are for people who like to play the kingmakers, the manipulators and the power behind the throne.  They have Moves which leverage their longevity in the Pack, whether that is keeping the history of the Pack, giving advice or being the only person who can dominate the Alpha.

Which moves in the game help create the play you intended with this game?

The play I’m looking for is a cycle.  The players want to have difficult relationships which sometimes explode and sometimes fade into the background as the Pack unifies.

In character generation you set up the tension and wedges between the Packmates using those relationship questions.  The MC will alternatively press on those relationships or provide threats to make the pack unify.  This cycle is fed by several of the Moves – the mechanics for domination and violence will deepen the wedges in the Pack giving people reasons to have emotional outbursts.  They also function as way they Pack can ‘get things done’ which makes them deliberately tempting.  When the tension is high the pack can Spill and Provoke Spill –  sharing emotional conversations about vulnerable things.  The subject for those conversations is often provided by the Domination and Mauling (and other Moves).  When you have those conversations you accumulate Pack Points which can be spent on assisting Packmates and on super powerful Pack Moves.

The Pack Pool is not just a pool of points for the players to use, it is an important signal for the MC. When the Pack Pool is low you should ease off the action and make space for emotional conversations.  When the Pack Pool is high you should press the threats and harry the player characters.

I love games with that emotional conversational element – but you can’t keep on spilling your heart without introducing fresh problems and issues for the characters to engage with.  The system cycles between giving people the Moves to have those conversations and the Moves which provide the content of those conversations.

What made you start working on Bite Me! and how long has it been in development?

Bite Me! is a game which has been living in my head in some form or another since I first read Bitten by Kelley Armstrong well over 10 years ago. I remember reading that book and knowing immediately that I wanted to play in a game like that one day. Which is often my reaction to media I love. But the design work started in earnest about two and a half years ago.

Previously I’d experimented with various ideas for Bite Me! including making it a freeform larp centered around pack food rituals. But I gradually came to realise that the PbtA system was such a good fit for all the reasons I mentioned earlier and so when the first Revelation Con was announced (that is the PbtA con that runs in Sheffield, UK) I pulled together a set of basic moves and 4 playbooks and took it along for a test drive.  That game went better than I could have hoped for a first playtest. The third Revelation con happened the weekend after I launched the Kickstarter and so far Bite Me! has been run there every year and I hope that is a tradition that continues.

If you’re interested in learning more about Bite Me! or backing it, head on over to Kickstarter and give it a look!

Becky Annison Interview – Bite Me! published first on https://medium.com/@ReloadedPCGames

[foursproutwealth-blog]

Now the Sexual Harassment Noose Falls Upon Rep. John Conyers

New Post has been published on http://foursprout.com/wealth/now-the-sexual-harassment-noose-falls-upon-rep-john-conyers/

Now the Sexual Harassment Noose Falls Upon Rep. John Conyers

Content originally published at iBankCoin.com

The sexual harassment allegations continue, with today’s showcase revelations being Charlie Rose and Rep. John Conyers. Over at the Weinstein scandal, upwards of 90 women have come forward, some of whom claimed they were outright raped by the big fat ape.

So you know, Harvey Weinstein is still at large.

This from Buzzfeed tonight — tipped off by Mike Cernovich

Here’s Mike discussing the latest scandal via Periscope.

Congressman John Conyers is a sexual predator, and Paul Ryan covered it all up https://t.co/rHAzX4Hevo

— Mike Cernovich ???????? (@Cernovich) November 21, 2017

Michigan Rep. John Conyers, a Democrat and the longest-serving member of the House of Representatives, settled a wrongful dismissal complaint in 2015 with a former employee who alleged she was fired because she would not “succumb to [his] sexual advances.”

Documents from the complaint obtained by BuzzFeed News include four signed affidavits, three of which are notarized, from former staff members who allege that Conyers, the ranking Democrat on the powerful House Judiciary Committee, repeatedly made sexual advances to female staff that included requests for sexual favors, contacting and transporting other women with whom they believed Conyers was having affairs, caressing their hands sexually, and rubbing their legs and backs in public. Four people involved with the case verified the documents are authentic.

And the documents also reveal the secret mechanism by which Congress has kept an unknown number of sexual harassment allegations secret: A grinding, closely held process that left the alleged victim feeling, she told BuzzFeed News, that she had no option other than to stay quiet and accept a settlement offered to her.

“I was basically blackballed. There was nowhere I could go,” she said in a phone interview. BuzzFeed News is withholding the woman’s name at her request, because she said she fears retribution.

Last week the Washington Post reported that the office paid out $17 million for 264 settlements with federal employees over 20 years for various violations, including sexual harassment. The Conyers documents, however, give a glimpse into the inner workings of the Office of Compliance, which has for decades concealed episodes of sexual abuse by powerful political figures

The woman who settled with Conyers launched the complaint in 2014 with Congress’s Office of Compliance alleging that she was fired for refusing his sexual advances and ended up facing a daunting process that ended with a confidentiality agreement in exchange for a $27,111.75 settlement. Her settlement, however, came from Conyers’ office budget rather than the designated fund for settlements.

Congress has no human resources department. Instead, congressional employees have 180 days to report a sexual harassment incident to the Office of Compliance, which then leads to a lengthy process involves counseling, mediation, and requires the signing of a confidentiality agreement before a complaint can go forward.

After this, an employee can choose to take the matter to federal district court, but another avenue is available: an administrative hearing, after which a negotiation and settlement may follow.

In her complaint, the former employee said Conyers repeatedly asked her for sexual favors and often asked her to join him in a hotel room. On one occasion, she alleges that Conyers asked her to work out of his room for the evening, but when she arrived the congressman started talking about his sexual desires. She alleged he then told her she needed to “touch it,” in reference to his penis, or find him a woman who would meet his sexual demands.

She alleged Conyers made her work nights, evenings, and holidays to keep him company.

In another incident, the former employee alleged the congressman insisted she stay in his room while they traveled together for a fundraising event. When she told him that she would not stay with him, she alleged he told her to “just cuddle up with me and caress me before you go.”

“Rep. Conyers strongly postulated that the performing of personal service or favors would be looked upon favorably and lead to salary increases or promotions,” the former employee said in the documents.

Three other staff members provided affidavits submitted to the Office Of Compliance that outlined a pattern of behavior from Conyers that included touching the woman in a sexual manner and growing angry when she brought her husband around.

One affidavit from a former female employee states that she was tasked with flying in women for the congressman. “One of my duties while working for Rep. Conyers was to keep a list of women that I assumed he was having affairs with and call them at his request and, if necessary, have them flown in using Congressional resources,” said her affidavit. (A second staffer alleged in an interview that Conyers used taxpayer resources to fly women to him.)

The employee said in her affidavit that Conyers also made sexual advances toward her: “I was driving the Congressman in my personal car and was resting my hand on the stick shift. Rep. Conyers reached over and began to caress my hand in a sexual manner.”

The woman said she told Conyers she was married and not interested in pursuing a sexual relationship, according to the affidavit. She said she was told many times by constituents that it was well-known that Conyers had sexual relationships with his staff, and said she and other female staffers felt this undermined their credibility.

“I am personally aware of several women who have experienced the same or similar sexual advances made towards them by Rep[.] John Conyers,” she said in her affidavit.

A male employee wrote that he witnessed Rep. Conyers rub the legs and other body parts of the complainant “in what appeared to be a sexual manner” and saw the congressman rub and touch other women “in an inappropriate manner.” The employee said he confronted Conyers about this behavior.

“Rep. Conyers said he needed to be ‘more careful’ because bad publicity would not be helpful as he runs for re-election. He ended the conversation with me by saying he would ‘work on’ his behavior,” the male staffer said in his affidavit.

“I don’t think any allegations should be buried…and that’s for anyone, not just for this particular office” The male employee said that in 2011 Conyers complained a female staffer was “too old” and said he wanted to let her go. The employee said he set up a meeting in December 2011 to discuss “mistreatment of staff and his misuse of federal resources.” The affidavit says that Conyers “agreed that he would work on making improvements as long as I worked directly with him and stopped writing memos and emails about concerns.”

Another female employee also attested that she witnessed Conyer’s advances, and said she was asked to transport women to him. “I was asked on multiple occasions to pick up women and bring them to Mr. Conyers[‘] apartment, hotel rooms, etc.”

BuzzFeed News reached out to several former Conyers staffers, all of whom did not want to speak on the record. One former staffer, who did not want to be named, said she was frustrated by the secretive complaint process.

“I don’t think any allegations should be buried…and that’s for anyone, not just for this particular office, because it doesn’t really allow other people to see who these individuals are,” said the former staffer. “When you make private settlements, it doesn’t warn the next woman or the next person going into that situation.”

Another staffer said that Conyers’ reputation made people fearful to speak out against him. Aside from being the longest-serving House member and the ranking member of a powerful committee, Conyers is a civil rights icon. He was lauded by Martin Luther King Jr. and is a founding member of the Congressional Black Caucus.

“Your story won’t do shit to him,” said the staffer. “He’s untouchable.”

In a statement to BuzzFeed News, House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi said she was not aware of the settlement.

“The current process includes the signing of non-disclosure agreements by the parties involved. Congresswoman Jackie Speier has introduced legislation that will provide much-needed transparency on these agreements and make other critical reforms,” Pelosi said in the statement. “I strongly support her efforts.”

What’s interesting about the revelations of sexual harassment is they’re mainly being reported by left wing media, concerning left wing men. Perhaps there’s a disruption in the matrix, or they’re quite literally eating their own. This didn’t age well.

Since #POTUS‘ first day in office, his admin & @HouseGOP have relentlessly attacked women’s #reprorights & access to care.

— John Conyers, Jr. (@RepJohnConyers) October 6, 2017

Good times.