#TheDiariesofaBigFeelingHuman

[bigfeelinghuman]

Faded Inspiration

time time  time

there was a moment in it where you meant everything to me

where life would be good and the simple fact that you were there made good, magical

where life would be bad and the simple fact that you were there made bad, more than bearable

where my heart became tinder  to sacrifice itself to the flame of our love

the sweet melody of your voice  the safety of your eyes your velvety skin  you,  you seemed to be all I needed in this life

you were my inspiration, my muse if one were to place a mirror in front of me all it would reflect was my love for you

a glance at your face a brush of my lips against yours and it was as though all the world’s poets possessed me and no net could be large enough to catch  the flood of words that poured out of me

that has faded now

such is the passage of time and the eagerness of the mind to forget

despite the soul’s reminders  that I love you Loved you 

[bigfeelinghuman]

my heart became tinder to sacrifice itself to the flame of our love -BigFeelingHuman

[bigfeelinghuman]

Haunted

There was a version of myself That existed  when you didn't 

I search for her  in vain

my mind  has walled her off, Deemed her a foreign entity

and instead,  the version  That knew you has engulfed  my being 

I sense you  In everything:

The cool breeze  That mocks me  With memories of your warm embrace

The cruel trick Of memory Fills the still air  With your scent

Every object  you have touched Every word  you have spoken

All tainted  by your essence

But you are gone.

You have been  laid to rest I watched as  Your body was lowered Into the depths  Of the earth  Then sowed flowers Surrounding Your hedge, Guarding your rest

Yet you are anything  but resting in peace As your shadow  Looms over my mind

Is it because I Constantly visit your grave?

By my own fault  You have been tethered  To this realm of thought

Have my tears  Supplied you with life And allowed you To take supernatural form?

Because it seems your ghost Has found its home, Haunting me, In the unused corners of my mind

[bigfeelinghuman]

I begged for ignorance Far too long after Praying for wisdom And I wished to be selfish Far too long After a lifetime Of being born to care

-BigFeelingHuman

[bigfeelinghuman]

Eternal Return

How does one encapsulate a feeling?

When life has come full circle

Where the world never ends   and you never start 

You simply are 

You are part

a deep breath taken  soon to be returned 

the roots of nature in the past growing ever closer to the future  while remaining in the present 

a reminder of all that perseveres

a place of solace 

where death and decay don’t phase you because a catalyst for new life has begun 

and how beautiful it is that it has been 

and will continue to be

-BigFeelingHuman