#The autistic wolf is hypersensitive to noise

[murderousjelliebean]

There are two wolves inside me. One has adhd and the other has autism. The autistic one needs schedules to function properly and the adhd one (despite being on two different meds) cannot keep to a schedule unless there are actual immediate consequences for doing otherwise. Yes it's almost one in the morning. Yes i only just got ready for bed. What is your point.

[normal-thoughts-official]

Hm... consider: Neurodivergent Maia. (Maiaphael neurodivergent solidarity. Also Magnus & Maia neurodivergent solidarity. I love this)

ok im sorry it took me this long to answer this, but, autistic maia? autistic maia!

makes sense too, like, ambiance is something that matters to her (“no one will want to join the pack if there are blotches on the wall” - clearly things regarding visual stimuli matter to her/bother her a lot, and at this point everyone already knows better than to argue with her), very one-tracked mind once she sets a goal (she basically won’t rest until she gets what she wants and she will do everything herself if needed be. like painting taki’s and the jade wolf entirely on her own, or the way she chased jace to the deepest realms of hell when she set her mind on killing him. same with clary, same with the way she was always after luke trying to convince him to take the right decision, same with the way she basically ran hunter’s moon entirely on her own lol), unwavering loyalty and very dead-set routine that she’s not letting go (for how many years has she been doing exactly the same job? and she clearly likes it. also worth noting that for a bar hunter’s moon really doesn’t have a lot of visual stimuli - no super loud noises, no extreme lightning... but anyway - even when she changes hunter’s moon to taki’s it’s still the same idea. when she decides to reform jade wolf, she is basically keeping everything the same way... she likes routine and doing the same things that she’s used to doing), oh god maybe the way she seems to particularly struggle with controlling her wolf/transformation is related to that, too... i mean of course there’s the part about her trauma which i have already talked about, but it also makes sense for maia to be autistic and thus struggle to keep perfect control of her body at all times, especially under stress, and that makes it harder for her to hold back or transform on purpose. also the fact that she snaps and twists so much! like, paired up with her trauma, it means that whenever she transforms into a wolf, she goes into great emotional distress, even if she wants it, and so it’s like.. that thing when your body seems to go out of your control and it snaps and twists and you’re like fighting it? you know what i mean? to be fair i’ve seen this more in my schzophrenic students but it’s a shared possible trait 

this paragraph is too long already but there’s more! maybe she initially chose bartending as a job because of the repetitive and easy motions. she is always playing with her shaker when she isn’t working so that makes sense. shit no more shaking??? no problem throw the shaker in the air wehoo again and again. most socially acceptable way of stimming she has i suppose, great to let go of pent up energy (and like boy does she need that with all the shit going down all the time). i’m gonna go back to loyalty for just a second and bring up “it took me so long to let go of you!” like even as jordan had abused her and hurt her a part of her was still obviously attached to him and that is a very autistic trait, you know? being helplessly attached to the same people even as they hurt you and you don’t understand why. and she struggled so hard to get rid of him and aaaa i’m pain

also, marine biology being her special interest.... my god i was such an idiot and a fool of course maia is autistic how could i have been so blind to the truth

also i’m pretty sure we’ve seen her go nonverbal a few times as therewere a few scenes where every word she was saying was clearly tiring her out and she was just exhausted afterwards, and... yeah

also thinking about how that pairs up with her claustrophobia like the way closed spaces make her feel hyperaware of everything and helpless to the stimuli so it amplifies her sensorial issues as well, so it’s the most horrible hypersensitivity + claustrophobia feedback loop. also thinking about how it is implied in many scenes that when she becomes overwhelmed she turns (like when luke locked her up and triggered her claustrophobia... haha man don’t we love it) so maybe like, before she was Turned, what used to happen were meltdowns? and now with the lycantrophy having meltdowns means being basically unable to control her wolf and so she ends up turning, and the distressed wolf also scratches and flaps around and howls and destroys everything.... i’m pain oh my god

also if visual stimuli are the most prone to giving her sensorial overload the wolf turning also makes sense since wolves see less color and so it’s one of the way her body now finds to try and tone down the overload

okay okay no more angst hopefully have a few cute maiaphael headcanons

can i just say... raphael’s voice. a bitch has an obsession okay the way he talks is just so... it sounds so velvety and smooth and his voice has that low tone and it’s just... entrancing and maia can listen to it for hours, which is funny because raphael isn’t usually much of a talker. but sometimes she will ask him things, especially regarding his special interests (like astronomy) or just stories, and lie on his lap, and he will pet her hair and tell her with that low, steady cadence that he speaks with, and it just feels perfect? like not only is it beautiful but it’s also steady/predictable and that makes it soothing and she is in absolute heaven when they do this

special interests sharing.... i love it okay. maia and raphael babbling about marine biology and astronomy respectively, and they both love hearing the other talk about it because they get it, they get how sharing your special interests is sharing love and baring your soul and even if they don’t share these interests they are genuinely delighted to soak up everything the other has to say about it. especially because their passion about the subject always makes it sound interesting!!!!

they get some see-through curtains for taki’s and her place to balance her need for less bright environments (hey ever noticed how she always makes it a point to make sure the places she’s frequently in have binded curtains and they’re always half-open when she’s there?) and raphael’s need for S U N  A N D  W A R M T H at all times. they are communication kings so they talk about it and try to find a solution that fits them both

it’s a great talk too because raphael also understands sensorial issues, and they are both highly empathetic, so like. she feels comfortable to tell him about how she needs a less bright environment without being defensive about it like she usually would (for good reason! because people are frequently assholes and she’s used to having to defend herself. but with raphael she knows she doesn’t have to, wouldn’t have to even if he weren’t autistic because he cares about her) 

also the fact that they are both autistic also tones up their communication kings shit up to one thousand, absolute icons. they both make it a point to always try to communicate what they need and be as clear as possible about it. neither has any interest in skirting around subjects or playing games (maia especially. raphael kinda had to learn how to do it because he worked for fucking camille for decades but that doesn’t mean he likes it. and even then that was never his approach, like, when he tried to kill clary he was all like “i am going to kill you now. i promise it will be painless. it’s just a practical decision”). although it also means that when they put their minds on the fact that something is Their Problem and they shouldn’t share it, it also takes a lot of work for the other to get them to talk... good thing they are both so stubborn lol

neither of them has to worry about making sure the other understands what the fuck they’re talking about, you know... because they know that the other isn’t looking for a thousand hidden meanings in their words, and also that, if they don’t get it, they will ask

basically, autistic maiaphael solidarity forever. god i love this. this is brilliant. thank you so much

[scriptautistic]

If my autistic werewolf was sensitive to noises/smells before being infected with the were virus, what would be an accurate way to describe the overload they would experience when shifted?

Well… Since the “were virus” doesn’t exist, it is a difficult question to answer. But since wolves have way better sense of smell and hearing than humans do, I guess everything would be magnified and more intense. This could be extremely painful if they’re already hypersensitive in their human form. This would probably lead to a lot of meltdowns (a wolf melting down must be quite dangerous), especially at the beginning when they’re not used to it and can’t prepare themselves to what is going to happen.

They could come to dread shifting because their wolf form equals pain for them.

Overload could be described as a piercing pain, everything being too loud/ too intense, filling up your head without leaving room for anything else… Really that’s up to you as a writer. But the general idea is “Too much something, it hurts”.

-Mod Cat