#The ambiguity of Rock n' Roll

[arlongo]

2000s Rock n' Roll Forever

Andrew McMahon, Angels and Airwaves, Jimmy Eat World, Mayday Parade, Paramore, and Yellowcard. 

It’d been nearly twenty years since my first concert in Jacksonville… seeing Gavin DeGraw. Over the last twenty years I must’ve seen over 50 artist/bands live. Not focusing on the cases of disability discrimination, I can honestly say I never attend a bad live show… Train was borderline, but Maroon 5 and Gavin DeGraw bailed their asses out.

I cut back on my concert-going experiences over the last half decade in parts due to higher ticket pricing, my growing frustration with being discriminated against and the lack of accountabilities from the venues, and getting old. 

However, there is a small list of six bands that I’ll go see live every chance I can. Last night I saw two of them, Mayday Parade and Yellowcard.

Mayday Parade’s debut studio album, A Lesson in Romantics remains one of my favorite albums of all time. I’m already counting down until their 20th anniversary tour in 2027. But for last night show, it was a nice mix of old and new tunes. I seen Mayday live more than Yellowcard… I was a fan of MP longer. They are still as fun live as the first time I saw them at Warped Tour. Keep being Mayday… it’s working.

The headliner is the recently reunited Yellowcard. Growing up in Northeast Florida, I was aware of the band from Jacksonville and their mega hit song, Ocean Avenue. My older brother is a huge fan and seen them at least twenty times. He always tell me how they’re one of the best live bands ever. So I join him for a show during the When You're Through Thinking, Say Yes era. By that time, I seen enough bands to tell which is just plain good and which is more than that. Yellowcard is one of the best live bands I seen and they’re still are after last night’s performance. With most bands, I could easily tell you my favorite album of their. With Yellowcard, it’s a bit complicated. They got so many great songs over different albums… I’ll always say Southern Air is my favorite song of their, Nothing totally capture the sound and spirit of Yellowcard more than Southern Air. Their new single, Childhood Eyes is probably going to be my favorite song of 2023. Hearing songs like Believe, Hang You Up, Light Up the Sky and With You Around live… I am reminded of a thought I had before with Yellowcard. They create songs that are great to perform live and to do the songs justice while performing on the stage. Not many bands have that dual ability and that’s exactly where Yellowcard’s greatness come from. 

Yellowcard, Mayday Parade, and Story of the Year reminded me why the 2000s indie rock scene was amazing. I was so inspired that I wrote and published a 700 pages book about a fictional indie rock band six years ago. I published five books so far and I still consider The Ambiguity of Rock n' Roll to be my favorite piece of writing and I don’t think any story I write will ever top it. The years of words and thoughts put into such an ambitious story like this while also maintaining my “trademark” of including at least one key disabled character. It may had took years to write it, but it was some of the most fun times I had writing while blasting songs from my speakers. My writing "career" may have beeb flattening since I started many years ago, but I'll keep on writing because what the hell... all you need is one hit song (or in my case, book)

Yellowcard said last night that they’re back and I am already looking forward to their next show. 

Rock n’ Roll Forever! (A callback to The Ambiguity of Rock n' Roll)

[bigfatbimbo]

I love you like an Alcoholic

2.1k words,, Bill x Reader

a/n — You did it, you saved the town.

warnings — NSFW, dom!reader, sub!Bill, toxic relationships, book of bill time era, orgasm denial, ambiguous superpowers, NOT PROOFREAD**

summary — Bill goes to his incredibly powerful (moreso than him) business partner, you, to try to get him out of theraprism. Things take a turn.

“I had to pull a lot of strings for this Bill,” you cross your legs and lean back in your thrown. 

Bill straightens his bow-tie, “Well toots, what if I told you I can make it worth your while?”

You breathe and then get up from your chair, “I’d tell you to stop floating in my lair. It’s distracting.”

Snapping your fingers, a bar appears in your otherwise empty room. While pouring yourself a drink, you can feel Bills eye-roll from across the room.

With a tip of his hat, his more human form appears, and sits down at the bar stool next to you. “Better?”

“Could do with more abs.”

He laughs but doesn’t change his appearance, “So, y/n. We go way back, right? I’m not gonna sugar code it, you’ve always been one of my favorites to do business with, doll. Wanna know why?”

“The fact i’m always so interested in what you have to say?”

His eye practically twitched at your indifference. Your attention was never payed in full. “Ha! Don’t flatter your self, pal. No, i’ll tell you why: did you know out of everyone in the galaxy, you’re the only equal I do business with?”

Your eyebrow arches, “equal?”

“Humor me,” he doesn’t give you the chance to reply before continuing. “Now, given my current position in ‘necessary therapy’—“ he makes a point of doing obnoxious air quotes, “—I don’t have much to occupy my days. And we both know i’d be of better use to you out here, right?”

You took another sip of your wine before getting up from the bar and walking over to your throne. The bar disappears behind you, leaving cipher ass-flat on the ground.

“Oh come on—“ His open eye turns red momentarily, before he dusts himself off, “Look, it’s hard being a god, y/n, I know that much. With that responsibility, I think a business partner would do you good. And all you’d have to do is bail me out, that’s practically no downside for you at all, buddy.”

Your patience had been wearing thin, and without further consideration you let out a larger grown from your chair, “Cipher, you’re a liability. I don’t want you. I’m honestly struggling to find enjoyment in sharing a drink with you, despite our history.”

A flick of your hand lifts him off his feet and brings him over to you, “Thought you had a no floating policy, eh?” There’s no fear in his voice, but there is in his eye. He’s losing.

“I’m gonna make this clear to you. You’re gonna take your disgusting human form, and you’re gonna march your happy ass back to theraprism, and you’re gonna stay there. Want my advice? Stop being so damn pathetic.”

A portal opens to take him back and he struggles in your invisible grasp, “No, wait! Please, I’ll do anything, just wait!” 

A human form was already a disadvantage, one he’d accepted in order to strike a deal, but a disadvantage still. And he hadn’t had any contact in a long time, aside from various psychiatrists telling him what’s ’wrong with him.’ 

So, you being someone he has history with could have contributed to his annoyingly human problem. Maybe it was the excitement, your attention or the lack there of, but something terrible happened at that moment. 

“Jesus, Bill. You really have hit rock bottom,” You murmur to yourself as you pull his floating body closer to you, your fingers dance around the bulge without touching it.

“Hey, hey, watch it— Your the one that made me have this stupid fleshbag, anyways— cut that out!” He struggled in the air, finding that he just couldn’t turn back into his normal form. You’re doing, he’d assume. 

To his dismay, you giggle and lean back, “Well now i’m enjoying myself. Now this I could help with, Cipher,”

“Ah, ah pass! Just get me down from here and—“ Back to prison? He’d have to swallow his pride on this one. And besides, it’s not like he wouldn’t like it… “Whatever you want, doll. I’m here all night.”

You examine him further, “Is that so?” 

Before he can answer, you drop him to his knees in front of you. “Ow! Careful with the merchandise, sweetheart. I’m not in mint condition these days— ah!”

Your foot presses down lightly on the bulge in his pants, and your fingers grab onto his chin, “Been a minute since we’ve done this. Huh, Cipher?”

He nods, going to say something, before you interject, “So i’d be good if I was you, baby.”

You press down on his hard-on with more pressure, watching Ciphers face flicker, biting his lip, before letting on a whimper. 

Despite not being his first encounter, so to speak, with you of this nature, it never failed to eat as his pride. And furthermore, despite this, it felt good. If Bill was anything, he was selfish. He could admit he was letting it happen for himself, instead of in spite of himself. So it can’t be that humiliating?

But in this position, there’s always shame.

“Y/n — give me a break—“ He breathed, eye twitching. 

You rolled your eyes and snapped your fingers, with that, his pants were gone and his dick was exposed. That’s another thing he could do without: your unpredictability 

“Next time, say please. Asshole.” You say, lifting him up with your powers once more.

“Wow, buddy. I’m not the one being the jerk here—“ It came out quick, as Bill words often did. But these ones he regretted immediately.

Your eyebrows furrowed, “Tough crowd?” He felt a sensation tugging at the base of his dick, indicating the start of mind games that wouldn’t end anytime soon.

He backtracked. Play it off. “Yeesh, you’re a tough crowd! Did I say jerk? You heard me wrong, I meant lovely— Ah, wait! Wait!”

A wave of pleasure flooded his senses abruptly, followed by a short pinch of pain, similar to what a mortal feels when they prick their finger on a piece of metal. Does that happen a lot? They’re all so clutsy, can’t be that out of the ordinary—

“Smooth talk your way out and maybe I’ll lighten the blow, yeah?” You smile cruelly, hand dangling out, flexing as if teasing what you could do to him.

“I— I know we’ve had our disagreements but I— augh!” A spike of pain, his eye rolled back a bit, “You— I’ve always admired your work— Yes! Respected you even, you’re an idol, sweetheart, ah, yes!”

With each compliment a burst of pleasure would go through him, landing at his unnatural dick, now leaking with precum. He was nearly babbling, but he was as aware of that as he was aware of the fact it was dearly encouraged.

“Very good, Billy. You’re too sweet, really.” Your voice was smooth and you bit your lip, watching him writhe with pleasure mid-air.

“A-anything for you, toots! Ah, more, more!”

He didn’t notice he said anything wrong this time until it was too late, but your face had noticeably darkened at the statement. 

“That’s awful demanding for someone in your position, dontcha’ think?” You weren’t actually mad, of course you weren’t. But you loved to you with him, and you took every opportunity. One of the reasons Bill tried to avoid you when he could; you were far too similar people, dealing in cruelty for the sake of entertainment.

“Wha- No wait!” The attention to his dick ceased to exist, and he was left with only aching for attention again, despite the fact you never gave anything physical in the first place. 

All mind games. “That’s- That’s not fair!”

“I’d watch who you were talking too, baby,” You flick your hand, spreading out his body parts mid air, hard leaking cock protruding out, crying for any kind of sensation. 

“You know what I can do. I’m sure I don’t have to remind you,” You sigh expectantly.

Bill tried to speak to defend himself, to talk his way out, but he found his ability to gone.

“I can make you do what I want, Cipher. Can make you feel whatever I want. Extraordinary pain—“ He cries out for a split second, eye flashing with fear, “—Or overwhelming pleasure.”

This time his eye rolled back, and he moans in wonderful agony, unable to move expect for wriggling his body parts weakly. His dick twitched.

“You like that feeling?”

He nods weakly, eyes fogging up, letting a small whimper escape.

“Don’t want me to hurt you?” Another nod, “Want me to make you feel good? Think you deserve it?”

“Ah— y/n, I need…” He swallows, revising his words in his mind, “Please, I need this.”

It’s true, Bill had never reached such a low in his entire existence. And he wasn’t sure if this interaction was pushing him further down or making him feel better. Now, however, he was struggling to think.

“Aw, baby. You have taken your punishment well? Been having a rough time too..” Your tone switched to something softer, almost to a condescending note.

His pathetic appearance did him justice, he pretended this was on purpose. 

Either way, a whine slipped from his throat and he shut his eyes, playing into it. You cooed in response, bringing him closer to you in order to run your hand along the side of his cheek. 

A spurt of pleasure shoots through his dick once more, and now he can’t help but yearn for something more. “Touch me— I need it— Please.” He threw in, trying to help his chances, despite the struggle at forming a coherent thought other than need.

“Hm,” You consider. Finally you reach out, running a finger along the base of his cock, to the tip. “You really want me to?”

He nodded desperately, mouth falling open to let out a small whine. Swear bedded his hot, red face, and dripped down, make his multiple chins glisten. Ugh, you preferred him further away. His already greasy looking hair was now slick against his forehead, and his eyes were glazed over. 

You slowly shift all of your fingers onto his shaft and then saintly drag them up and down for the first few strokes. A gutteral whimper falls from Ciphers mouth, “Oh, yes!”

“What do we say, baby?” You ask, grip tightening suddenly as if to bring him back to reality, but not too tight. 

“Ah— Thank you!” He’d almost forgotten to detest you for making him say that. And he’d almost forgotten to remind himself to be mad after he was done feeling good.

He used to daydream about taking you down after these sessions. Rising to power and having you at his feet. But now he only wants to keep your attention on him. Now it’s all he can think about. 

You continue to stroke his leaking cock, leaning in to kiss his cheek fat, “Good boy.”

He moaned, “Don’t do that-“

“I’m not patronizing you. I mean it, you’re acting better than usual and i’m glad. Maybe you’re more desperate, or touch-starved, but you’re doing good. I’m proud of you, sweetheart.”

“Ah—“ He would have came right there if he could. And in the most literal sense, he couldn’t. You weren’t letting him. “Please, let me come. I can’t do this, have mercy, I’ll do anything—“

“I don’t know, I’m having a good time. Why should I?” Another desperate need to release wipes over him, an uncontrollable need that was actively being controlled. 

Despite himself, he teared up. His fingers rose to touch his face, which he realized, was now damp with falling tears, “No, no, no! I can’t- I’ve never- Human bodies— I need to. Please!”

You look at him and smile. 

“I’ve been good,” He reminded you.

With that, you have in. Your other hand moved away to snap your fingers, a gesture that wasn’t need to carry out the action, but to show that he’d earned his reward. 

“Yes! Thank you! Oh gods— Oh-“ He leaned back, finally having the orgasm that was being withheld from him. And god, it felt good.

You felt good, and he hated that. 

[heyhoeudoin]

LOYALTY BUILT FROM LOVE

"I will always be by your side."

pairing: senku ishigami x fem!reader

words: 5.4k

genre/s: fluff, mystery, storytelling in the third perspective (s1, s2)

warning/s: she/her, swearing, ambiguous/not direct ending

synopsis: there is always someone next to senku, all the time.

masterlist ; times senku talked about you (part 2)

a/n: i've been wanting to do something similar to my bakugo fanfic, "Indebted to you" for a while now, and i finally thought of one.

also woah, i posted... revolutionary!

ever since senku arrived at the newfound kingdom of science, he's always had someone next to him

that someone is you

you are never too far from senku

and senku is never too far away from you

when kohaku met senku under that log, that's when she saw you the first time

at first she didn't question it, thinking that you might've just not been there when she saw the fight, but after observing you and senku

she then changed her mind and thought it was strange that she didn't see you

the way the two of you worked together was mesmerizing; efficiently done in silence

she could see that the two of you have some sort of special relationship with that silent communication

you reminded her of her sister; almost princess like with the way you carry your knowledge and demeanor

that impression quickly changed when you flipped ginro and kinro to the ground when they tried to attack senku

it happened so fast that you were just a blur in the corner of her eye! you were faster than her and you took them both out with a single hand

at that moment she knew not to cross senku

she wasn't even sure if she could defeat you

she almost pities the long-haired man

when gen appeared, you didn't recognize him, but he had recognized you

of course he did

everyone in japan knows who you are and anyone who doesn't is living under a rock

he was confused on why a person of your caliber is acting like a servant

maybe for survival, but he's sure that you'd be able to survive on your own

but then he started observing the two of you and this master-servant relationship seemed normal on both end

it made him curious on just what exactly your relationship with senku is

his curiosity skyrocketed after he overheard a conversation between you and senku

gen stood at the bottom of the hut after you and senku climbed up. he was lucky enough that you didn't spot him (well, that's what he thinks).

"so," senku spoke. "do you know him?" then asked. there was a pause. gen thinks you might've gave a non-verbal answer. senku chuckles. "of course, i didn't think you would. he's just some tv show mentalist."

gen rolled his eyes at that, but agrees with what senku said. it would be very shocking to hear that you know of him. "so he's a psychologist?" the first words he heard from you.

"yeah," answered senku. "he wrote these magazines that some of the club talked about some times. it would have questions like "if you could only save one, would you rather save your mother or your partner?" how illogical is that?" he scoffs.

this time you chuckled at him. "but senku," you interrupted. "you do understand just how useful he is, right?" gen felt a chill run up his spine as his whole body tensed up. your light tone immediately changed to a more penetrating one. it almost feels like you're reminding senku of your authority.

"yeah, yeah, i know, and don't use that tone on me. you know that shit don't work," senku replies, dismissing your tone like it was nothing! and to which you giggled at in a playful manner. "so, your assessment of him?" he then asked.

"gen is like a stray cat; give him something to eat and he'll stay," you answered with smooth confidence. "sooner or later he'll ask you for something in exchange for his loyalty." you let out a chuckle. "isn't that right, gen?"

he quickly walked away and didn't look back

maybe you were the one to plant the seed in him

maybe it was senku with his fast-paced bringing back the modern world (and his charisma)

or maybe it was the both of you

but whatever it was, in the end you were right

gen became an important member of the the kingdom of science

although he still wants answers about the two of you

there's two stories that ruri likes out of all hundred tales

she loves sharing them the most

after all, it's the only two love stories from it

number ninety-eight: loyalty built from love there was once a girl who had everything everything but happiness the people around her always worshipped her like a god it made her feel lonely and dull but then she met a boy a boy who knew of everything everything except who she is she talked to him... she argued against him... she laughed alongside him she made him smile.... they were friends they were inseparable but then she felt love he didn't like love she was afraid he became distant she sought after him he stopped seeing her she went to him it was silent then she talked... then he shouted... then they confessed they were in love her love shined through the things she did for him loyalty knows no bounds when you're in love

number ninety-nine: learning to love there was once a boy who found everything interesting everything except love he thought it was illogical and he didn't want to feel it but then he met a girl a girl who can do everything everything except how to feel he talked to her... he fought her... he laughed with her... he smiled at her they were friends they were inseparable he felt different with her he didn't know what it was it scared him he tried to push her away she stayed he ignored her she confronted him it was silent then she spoke... then he screamed... then they confessed they were in love his love was seen from the way he treated her love wasn't so illogical than he thought he did

there was no names mentioned in the two love stories

ruri wished the founder of the village had included the names

maybe it did but was forgotten through time

kohaku didn't really care about her own romances

but if it's other's?

then that's when she's interested

she could never forget the scene she saw between you and senku after the grad bout ended

the placed turned quiet as the realization seeped in. the winner of the grand bout is senku which means... "the new village chief and the husband of the priestess is the winner of the grand bout, senku!"

"well, this is a pain in the ass," senku says as he stuck his pinky into his ear. "so i just have to marry ruri and the whole village is mine, right?" he approached ruri. "i'll do it then."

from the corner of kohaku's eye, she saw you hurriedly walk away with a tightly closed fist. you're actually walking away without senku. that's the first time she ever saw you go away from senku.

she turned back to senku who's staring at your retreating figure. he turned his head back and demanded, "wine! bring me wine!" then after that, it all happened so quickly. senku divorced her sister, took the wine, and ran back to the kingdom of science, dragging kaseki with him.

once they arrived, senku left towards the laboratory where you were, gathering the materials to make the sulfa drug. kohaku watched as you ignored senku. he reached up and flicked your forehead. the two of you talked, rather fast paced with how fast the two of you exchanged words.

senku gently reached out for you hand, bringing it up to his lay on his cheek. he turned his head and kissed your palm.

kohaku's eyes widen in shock.

it looked like you laughed and tackled him into a hug that almost caused you both to fall. you stepped back as you brought your hands up to cup his face. you spoke a few words, then brought your face down to his forehead, giving it a gentle yet light kiss.

kohaku's jaw slacked in shock.

she remembered being flustered, shocked, and confused from the sudden public display of affection the two of you showed

it changed the way she sees the two of you

she always thought that you were like a bodyguard for senku, but also good friends

but if that's how you two always act when you think no one's watching?

maybe the two of you aren't just friends

at first, homura went around spreading the fire to the village

then all she saw was black the next

when hyoga revealed that he was just a distraction, the fire wasn't as big as he planned it to be

in fact, he never planned for homura to be carried in bridal style by someone he didn't expect

did senku revive you? why would he revive you? wait, how did he even find you? your place is no where near where they are right now

it doesn't make any sense

but for now, he'll retreat

he'll surely be beaten by you in mere minutes

chrome admires you and senku, everyone could see that

senku taught him many things about being a sciencer and you'd teach him "life skills"

the two of you work so well together

there are times wherein he watches you and senku work in the lab and it would always leave him in awe

how can the two of you work that well and that fast without any talking?!

are you also a science user like him?

but senku said you weren't so that made him slightly confused

it became even more confusing when he saw you beat kohaku in a spar for the grand bout

just who are you?

and why are you so good at everything?

it reminds him of something but he can't remember what exactly

then he saw something between you and senku that he can't help but make assumptions from

senku turned away from the group after experimenting with the bamboo filaments. "damn it," he cursed out. "bamboo filaments are just fundamentally too weak for vacuum tubes." your shoulders dropped as you looked at senku in worry.

"i don't get science, but bamboo is too weak, is that right?" kohaku spoke up.

"what do we need?" chrome asked with desperation. "if we need something tougher, i'll go find it!"

"no..." senku turned around, showing his pained expression. "there's nothing better in this age."

kohaku and chrome gathered the baskets of rocks that he collected and placed them out in the open for anyone to look through. from the news that senku needed something other than bamboo, the villagers who were still awake gathered at the kingdom of science to help.

chrome turned to call for senku, but he hesitated.

you stood next to senku and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. he turned to you with eyes that chrome can't explain as he placed his hand on top of yours. you brought your other hand and took hold of his hand that was on top of your other one. you guided his hand to the side of your lips and placed a kiss on his palm.

chrome's bulged out of his sockets in shock. his face feeling a bit flustered.

you slowly went down his arm, leaving a trail of kisses. you stopped at his inner elbow and turned to his face. chrome thought you were going to kiss senku, but instead you left a peck on his cheek. you spoke a few words to him and he let out a small smile.

chrome knows that smile

it's the smile that he only gives to you

he never understood why that smile felt different from all the other smiles and smirks senku gives

but from what he just witnessed

maybe the two of you hold a special bond that he should've noticed sooner

it was senku's birthday

the entire village gathered at the kingdom of science

ruri stared at you from afar

you watched as senku was guided towards the newly built watch tower (observatory)

it was the first time she'd seen you not go after senku

after all, the two of you were inseparable

it reminds her about the two love stories from the hundred tales

you started walking away from her line of vision. ruri watched as you walked towards the watch tower as the main group of the kingdom of science left. she could see senku climbing down as well, then approached you. you immediately took his hand in yours and placed the other on his cheek. you spoke a few words then leaned down, giving him a tender yet short kiss on the lips.

on the lips.

on the lips.

AND HE DIDN'T PUSH YOU AWAY!111!1!!!

ruri doesn't remember what happened after that

she was too flustered over the sudden public display of affections the two of you shared that it was the only thing stuck in her head for a while

although, she now hopes that her two favorite stories were based off of the relationship you and senku hold with each other

if only

the first time kohaku, well, anyone, saw you cry was when senku's father relayed a message to you (instead of his own son)

"senku, it's you, isn't it?"

"—nah, you don't need that dramatic father-and-son crap, do you?" senku cackled from that. "but y/n better be there standing next to you like she always is." it was the first mention of you from the record. "i know rebuilding japan will be your priority, y/n, but i also know that you'll stay by senku's side to rebuild the world. take care of him for me, y/n!"

from the corner of kohaku's eye, she saw you raising your hands up to your face, covering it. she saw senku move his arm that lays on your lower back. it looks like he's comforting you.

something then happened that kohaku can never forget

it'll be embedded in her head for so long

kohaku walked towards senku about to call him out, but stopped mid walk. senku stood next to you; both of your backs facing her. he turned his head to look at you. you turned your head to look at him. a few words were exchanged. he raised his hand and gently held your chin. he pulled you towards him and gave a short peck, but then you took hold of his collar and smashed your lips back onto his.

...

kohaku paused for a second. "senku!" then decided to just call the scientist out and continued with what she was going to tell senku either way.

gen was about to go up the observatory when he heard you and senku having a talk

"hey, senku, how would you feel if i..." your question trailed off, hinting at something that seemed like only you and senku know about, or you did something non-verbal.

there was a pause; senku probably thinking over his reply. "but i thought you like playing this game?"

they were playing a game? at this time? gen thought to himself, confused.

"of course i do; it amuses me. this game can only be played a few times after all. i'm only asking because i thought it'd be my turn to do it," you clarified which didn't really make any sense to gen at all. what you said got rid of the image that you two are playing game. just what the hell are you two talking about up there?

there was another pause. "just come up already. what do you want?" it was senku calling him.

kohaku was never afraid of you

why would she be?

you're no enemy

"senku, let me make something clear," kohaku called out. "homura's movements are exceptional."

"gymnastics," says senku. "it's a skill that doesn't exist in your age. y/n can do them too." he jerked his head to your direction you.

"we won't be able to capture her unharmed, but i could behead her with my sword. am i free to kill her?" a serious question kohaku dropped. yours and senku's eyes narrowed at her.

"kohaku, have you ever killed a human being?" you asked kohaku, now standing in front of her. kohaku opened her mouth, but you raised your hand up. "of course you haven't—i know that—and you'll hesitate when the time comes, but, please, kohaku," you called her name with a shaky tone and a hint of guilt that she never heard from you. "never offer yourself to kill another human being. you need to keep that morality with you, it's what makes a person human."

kohaku understood what you said

but she was left with questions that hung in the air, afraid to be asked

were you surrounded by death through killing?

or were you the one killing?

she really wouldn't dare ask

gen knows just how formidable the people around tsukasa are

but the thing is the kingdom of science has you

and he kind of wants to brag about that

"i'm sure you guys know how strong tsukasa is, but it's not just him. the people around him are formidable as well," says nikki through the phone. she then revealed another of tsukasa's allies being someone of great hearing.

"ukyo?" senku asks, turning to gen.

"he was a sonar operator on a submarine," explained gen. "he's got insanely good hearing. that's why tsukasa woke him up."

"good hearing you say?" you piped up. "what a useful thing in certain situations. what are the chances we could get him to our side?" you asked senku with a carefree grin to which he just fondly smiles at.

it was then gen realized something after your comment. "y/n-chan, is it true that your family are...?" he trailed off, not sure how to ask and afraid that you'd be offended from him bringing up rumors about your family.

you understood what he was asking, but all you did was chuckle making senku sigh. gen smartly decided not to push any further. he also took your ominous chuckle as confirmation.

"wait," called nikki. "y/n?"

gen smirked. "yes, nikki! we have the l/n y/n on our side! tsukasa and his army may be formidable, but we have the most formidable on our side," he boasted proudly. "as everyone in japan knows, no one can ever beat a member of the l/n family."

you smiled knowingly, feeling a sense of control and pride at gen's comment making senku sigh once more. "can we stop feeding her ego?" he comments

"y/n!" screamed taiju, both as a calling out and a greeting. "are you taking care of senku?!"

"i am perfectly capable of taking care of myself," commented senku with a deadpan.

you howled out a laughter. "of course i am taiju. are you taking care of yuzuriha?" you asked back.

"yes i am!" he answered confidently to which you laughed fondly at.

gen's plan was to just brag about you

but he was not expecting to get something interesting out of this

he thought yuzuriha and taiju didn't know about you

but they do

which just brings him more questions than answers, honestly

when could they have met you?

actually now that he thinks about it, when did senku meet you?

when magma came back after escaping the hands of ukyo, he also relayed the message that chrome got abducted

kohaku immediately wanted to barge in and take chrome back

and she could never forget the humbling moment of when you instantly stopped her

"chrome's been captured by the tsukasa empire!" exclaimed suika in a fits of worry and panic.

"well, what's the plan, twig?" demanded magma towards senku.

a serious look on the scientist's face as you straightened your posture up, standing next to him. kohaku frowned then ran off with her sword in hand.

"kohaku?!" screamed ruri. "she's not going to help him by herself, is she?"

"she's so quick to act," commented kaseki.

"stop kohaku!" kokuyo commanded, pointing in the directed his daughter took off.

ginro looked at the former village chief in aghast. "but how?! there's no one in this village who can catch up to kohaku-chan!"

oh but there is someone.

"y/n." with one simple call from senku, you had already appeared in front of kohaku, disarmed her of her sword, and pushed her against the ground.

all in three seconds.

she was right from the start

she could never beat you

it really is a good thing you're on their side

of all the people he'd expect to be on the other side of this stone world call

he never would have expected you

in fact, ukyo never expected to to talk to you at all

but here he is

being reassured by you, of all people

"—if you promise to produce zero casualties, i'll cooperate with you. but if you kill even one person..."

senku starts cackling at his request. "sounds great! i'm in." gen shrieks at this. "no problem. we've said—" senku turned around to see your hand on his shoulder. he immediately moved away for you to stand in front of the microphone.

"i do not know what kind of person you are, ukyo, but you are naive to think that a war would not have any bloodshed." he freezes. he knows that voice... he knows it too well. everyone in japan knows it too well. "however, i know how senku is. i know that his plan from the beginning were to have zero casualties, and if that's the plan, then i assure you that there will be no bloodshed at all."

"that's gonna be a pretty tough battle!" exclaimed gen after your declaration.

ukyo believed you

he believed you immediately

he had no reason to doubt you... or senku

especially when you supported him that confidently

he feels relieved to know that you're not on tsukasa's side

if you were

then the ground would've been red

tsukasa never expected there to be a phone in the grave of senku

he never expected for some of his allies to turn against him

he also didn't believe hyoga when he said you were revived

but maybe he should've believed him

but at the same time, what good would it be if he had believed hyoga?

tsukasa is sure that no one can beat you

not even the strongest high school primate

"i can save everyone with this paper airplane dynamite," says senku as the nitroglycerin covered airplane exploded upon impact at a tree.

"what the hell was that?!" stammered ginro.

"anyone caught in that would be gone without a trace," commented kinro.

kohaku stared in awe at the leftover the explosion made, then smirked smugly. "human strength is laughable in comparison to the power of science."

senku laughs. "we made it just in time. you held out well, battle team."

"the kingdom of science has just completed dynamite! it has the power of ten billion megaton joules," gen boldly gave out a lie. senku glanced at him calling out for his bold ass lie to which gen defended that senku sucks at negotiating.

"whether i parry it or smack it down, it'll explode. there's no way to dodge a large blast." tsukasa hums. "yes, it's true that we're out of moves, but that would surely cause collateral damage and kill many people. senku, you're incapable of abandoning people. you would never sacrifice yourself either."

"well, well, it looks like we're both stuck. this isn't a victory; it's a stalemate," says senku. "in your eyes anyways." he moved forward and held onto another nitroglycerin covered airplane. "did you know nitroglycerin is y/n's favorite?"

tsukasa froze at the sudden information drop. so it was true? of all the people, why would you be on senku's side? in fact, why were you at this side of the country at all when the petrification happened?

"y/n, no bloodshed remember?"

tsukasa looked behind him to see you standing there with a knife against his throat. he didn't even hear you nor sensed your presence. is this the power you hold as a member of the l/n family? "are you going to take revenge, senku?" he asked.

"no, of course not," senku deadpans. "let's negotiate, tsukasa."

throughout the entire negotiation, you did not move one bit away from his neck

tsuksa knew of your abilities, but seeing it in person was a different experience

he had one question for you though

why do you let senku command you like that?

"what reason do i have to believe you?" he asked senku.

"all you have is my word. i don't lie when it comes to science," answered senku, cooly. "is that not enough?" tsukasa heard you softly squeal at the sight of senku. does senku really have you wrapped around his finger that quickly? no, that wouldn't make any sense. unless the two of you share some history together?

"no, that's plenty."

this would be chrome's first time watching someone get revived from petrification

instead, before that could happen, he revealed some information that he thought was common knowledge

it wasn't

as senku was about to pour the revival fluid, taiju stopped him. "wait senku! mirai-chan's naked," exclaimed taiju as he poked senku's eyes. "no! you can't revive her now!"

senku writhed on the ground in pain, covering his eyes. "here we go again with your absurd nonsense," he managed to let out. "we're in an emergency, in the stone world! who cares if you're buck naked or if your peepee's showing?" he raised his hand up, rubbing his eye to soothe the pain, then removed them showing his teary eyes. "you really like this plot twist, don't you? we'll figure it out once she wakes up—"

"but if it's y/n, would you be okay with it?" senku snapped his mouth shut at taiju's rebuttal. he turned over to you, who's standing next to him, to see a smirk growing on your face. he could already feel the headache coming from this small tease.

you raised your hand and casually revealed, "actually he revived me naked, so..." heads turned to senku who flinched at the sudden movement, all of them looking shocked (sans kohaku, she's actually mad).

"senku!" kohaku roared, drawing her dagger out.

"what's wrong with that?" asked chrome, breaking the tension. kohaku turned her head to glare at chrome who flinched at that hostility.

"chrome-chan, it's bad manners to see someone naked without their consent," informed gen, treating chrome as if he was an innocent child.

"no, i know that!" exclaimed chrome. "but they bathe together, so they see each other naked all the time," he then revealed. heads turned once again to senku, but this time to you as well to which senku sighs and you laugh at.

"and just how do you know that, chrome?" senku asks, then lets out a disgusted face. "don't tell me..."

"no!" denied chrome immediately. "i notice you guys heading towards the springs together a lot and y/n would be carrying a bamboo basket of like these cases and i also saw soap in it, so i assumed that you two would be taking a bath... together." he then realized the implications of what he revealed and turned red.

god bless yuzuriha on making a set of clothes for mirai, breaking the tension.

many things were revealed that night

under the curtesy of chrome

he never thought too deeply about the things he know, but saying it out loud made him realize some things

it made gen and tsuka understand just what of relationship you hold with senku as well (kind of)

and so the question changes

how did you and senku get to that point?

"senku..." chrome called out. "we're missing some dynamite," he shared with a serious tone.

upon hearing that you quickly scanned the area and noticed who are missing, and bolted off. a few minutes later, an explosion rang out, then you heard gen screaming out to the villagers to hurry up.

you snuck up on hyoga, bloodlust accidentally slipping which made him dodge, but barely. a line of blood forming across the back of his shoulder blades. he raised his spear and instead of aiming it at you, he aimed it at mirai. you moved forward, blocking the attack on hitting her. the spear pierced through you, but not as deep as hyoga wanted since you were able to stop it by holding onto it.

"so you're not impenetrable," he mused.

"go fuck yourself," you spat.

you broke the spear in half then pushed it through you, popping it out from the back. you spun around, catching the bloodied half of the spear, then turned right back around, using the momentum to throw it towards hyoga.

"get out of there! tsukasa! mirai!" you heard senku cry out from the distance. "y/n!" then you heard him let out this blood curdling scream.

you lost balance from the powerful throw causing you to slip and fall. tsukasa ran over. hyoga blocked the spear with the other half of it. tsukasa managed to catch you, holding onto your wrist. hyoga quickly picked up the bloodied upper half of the spear and aimed it at tsukasa. you swung yourself forward, your feet flat against the mountain wall and pushed yourself off, pulling tsukasa down with you. hyoga missed his stab, grazing the side of his torso instead. the sudden pull made mirai slip from the edge, but luckily senku caught up and pulled her away from the edge. however, hyoga then kicked senku off the mountain to which he jumped down afterwards.

senku's hands trembled as he held the wound, putting pressure on it. you could feel his fright against your skin, in fact, you're just as frightful as he is. the both of you can't lose each other. he can't lose you; and you don't wanna leave him. tsukasa kept himself busy as he fought against hyoga, but anyone with eyes could see that tsukasa is affected by the cut.

"you need to work with him, senku, i can survive for a few minutes," you managed to tell him as you reached towards your wound, holding it down with two hands. "you two can end this fight just as quickly as it started. we both know how bad water and blood is inside of a punctured lung." your breathing increased.

"save your breath! y/n, please..." senku lowered his head, laying it against your forehead.

"then go and help tsukasa already," you forcefully told him with gritted teeth.

hyoga managed to get his way over to where the two of you were. he kicked you away from senku. "y/n!" he screamed out.

anyone could tell that senku was distressed

it was the most obvious thing

you've been unconscious for barely a few hours and yet he's become restless

the people who know senku well enough are shocked at this newfound side of his

then again at the same time, they weren't shocked

everyone knows just how much you and senku care for each other despite not knowing just what exactly the relationship the two of you hold

(there was assumptions of it, but that's all they were: bold assumptions)

"senku, you need to rest," advised gen, looking worried. "you took a beating as well."

senku shook his head. "what's the point of sleeping when i need to think of a way to save y/n," he replied, pacing in the cave room you laid in.

taiju and yuzuhira glanced at each other, worried for their long time friend. this was not the first time this had happened. they hoped it would be the last, but here they are yet again, watching senku worry upon hours for an injured you.

"senku, do you want to sleep in here?" yuzuriha asked softly. senku looked up at her and nodded, no words to be said.

"i'll get a spare bed for you senku! no worries!" exclaimed taiju as he ran off.

"has he ever been like this before?" kohaku asked, going straight to the point. gen and chrome walked closer to kohaku and yuzuriha.

yuzuriha's lips drew into a thin line, unsure if she should share. she knew about the game you and senku liked to play, after all, she was one of the first victims. "only when y/n becomes reckless and injuries herself, but this time it's worse. it's hard to heal an injury as severe as that in the stone world."

"it's obvious," mentioned gen. "i may not know what relationship they have together, but if my assumptions are right, then it makes sense. usually senku would've thought of something by now, but he hasn't. his mind is being blocked by anxiousness, panic, and worry. he needs to calm down."

"senku..." you weakly called out which caught senku's attention immediately, and crouched down next to you. "get your ass to sleep." the others were taken aback at the first sentence you spoke after you woken up from a short coma.

senku let out a huff of amusement. "of course that's the first thing you say," he mentions.

"you know me so well, love." a weak smirk formed on your face. if anyone picked up on the sudden affectionate name, they didn't mention it. "but seriously though, how can you save me when you can't even think straight. you know me well, but i know you just as well, senku."

senku furrowed his brows.

"you need to accept what you need to do, senku."

masterlist ; times senku talked about you (part 2) a/n: it's not as ambiguous as i want it to be, but i thought the ending seemed fitting

[peggyao3]

Relic - Pt. 4 "O God!"

PAIRING: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Unnamed Ambiguous FMC

SUMMARY: ✧༺༻ Dreams are messages from the deep ༺༻✧ A woman from the unknown comes to Feyd in his dreams and his nights become his days as he flees to the dreamscape to escape the nightmares that haunt his waking hours.

TAGS: 18+, smut, she/her AFAB FMC, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, oral sex, Porn with Plot, Feyd-Rautha's black cum, Feyd-Rautha's big cock, Praise Kink, Body Worship, angst/hurt and comfort, drama, fluff, Frank Herbert would frown, some politics, implied/referenced (child) abuse ❗, Trauma, mentions of suicidal thoughts ❗, Healing, Strangers to Lovers, falling in love, Vulnerable!Feyd, Emotional!Feyd, Possessive!Feyd, Feyd is a sweet baby who did nothing wrong and I WILL pamper him, nurture not nature, Stockholm Syndrome but in a consensual way, lucid dreaming, implied/referenced cannibalism ❗, implied/referenced murder

WORD COUNT: 2.5k

A/N: Fluff meets oh God help us 😩

Reposted from my Ao3 💕| Masterlist under construction ⚠️| Relic Masterlist

Divider by @saradika-graphics

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Night 100

"Do you know that tonight marks our hundredth night together?" Feyd purrs, blue eyes glittering like little seas, shoulders rolling as he sways her in his lap.

"Is that why I get to be on top tonight?" Mirth laces her tone, rocking herself up and down with the aid of his hands. This barely counts as being on top when he does all the heavy lifting for her.

"You get to be wherever you want, my sweet."

She lets out a sultry moan, holding herself at the lowest point of Feyd's lap, relishing how deep he reaches, how completely he fills her when she has fully sank down on him, feeling the smoothness of his thighs against her behind. Feyd moans with her, suckling on her neck which is so beautifully bared to him.

"Really, you've been keeping count?" She mewls when Feyd begins to rock her anew, only little thrusts that make her walls flutter with growing anticipation.

"I have. I've made a tally chart."

That is so endearing to her that she laughs brightly and asks: "With chalk on the walls of your prison cell? I'm so sorry for holding your dreams hostage." She doesn't know how right she is, though it’s not the dream that is the prison. On second thought, what would happen if left through that door over there? They've never tried, because the things to be discovered within each other are of much greater interest.

She adds: "I haven't made a tally chart, but I did write in my diary after our first night. I was so certain I'd never have a dream like that again, I never wanted to forget it."

"What did you write?" Feyd inquires with sparkling eyes, now suckling on her collarbones and then her breasts, rendering her breath shaky and thick with lust when she replies.

"I wrote that I encountered the most wondrous man in my dreams last night and that I could touch him and it felt so real. I wrote that you have pretty eyes and a silly name. I may have also written that I've never come so hard in my life."

That lights a fire in Feyd's eyes and chest and he clutches her body to his tightly, rutting up into her cunt with his feet propped up on the bed. She seeks purchase on his shoulders, clinging to him. Feyd seems intent on exceeding their first night, and with the way her core coils, she thinks he just might.

"And what do you write nowadays?" He inquires with husky voice.

"That's a, haahhh, secret. It's a diary for a reason."

That doesn't quite please Feyd, but he is very pleased by her tone of voice on the edge of despair, spine arching, teeth gritted. His balls feel taut and ready to burst and he keeps his composure only for her. "Well, I want you to write about this night when you wake up, can you do that for me?"

"Yes! Yeees, haaaahhh~ Feyd!" She falls into the mindless embrace of climax, mewling his name, riding him with stuttering hips. It is less the feeling of her fluttering walls that makes him spill himself with a guttural sound, more the sight of his woman so disheveled, features painted in bliss.

When they've both calmed down from their highs, she sinks limply into Feyd's embrace, hearts thundering against each other. Feyd peppers her shoulder with kisses and she does the same to his. She likes his shoulders. After a minute, when her breath is a little calmer, she kisses his neck and jaws.

"That tickles," Feyd complains, scrunching his nose.

"You have a birthmark right here, did you know that?"

"You think I don't know my own body?" In fact, Feyd wasn't fully aware of the birthmark there, just at the underside of his jaw. He avoids looking at himself all too much and all too close, especially outside of the dream.

"It's very pretty. You don't have many birthmarks at all. So smooth." She drags her nose across his neck, blowing softly on him and Feyd flinches, cursing her lightly. That fucking tickles! Eventually, she finds something of interest, touching a spot at his neck with tender fingertips.

"What have you got there, another birthmark?" His voice comes as a light, raspy chuckle.

"No… A scar," she tentatively admits, tracing the blemished skin at the side of his neck. A small sickle moon whose tip brushes against his collar bone. Immediately, she regrets pointing it out, because only one thing comes to mind.

"A scar?" A scar he would remember. Feyd's hand joins hers on his neck, feeling the slightly marred flesh, a scar that's barely an inch long. "I don't have that when I'm awake," he pensively admits. The Baron never hurts him so far up.

Night 168

If only she had the resources and the time, she would have spent every waking hour trying to solve the enigma of her and the man named Feyd, would have done more than writing fondly in her diary, would have wired her body and brain up in a sleep lab and studied how their connection works, but she might never get the chance. No, she will never get the chance. How could that not devastate her?

She hasn't told anyone in her waking life about him. He is her wondrous companion at night, her best friend from a dream with whom she can run away, into whose embrace she can crawl to hide from everything and everyone, with whom she doesn't need to think.

Feyd hasn't failed to notice how restless she has been for the past week, her shoulders always tight, her gaze faraway and a look of guilt and pain plastered into her eyes so deep, not even his touch could melt her anymore.

Presently, his hands curl around the nape of her neck, entangling his fingers in her hair, nose sliding against hers as he slots his lips against hers in a desperate attempt to stifle his own bubbling inquiry. But she cups his cheeks and merely presses their foreheads together, cradling him like he's the most precious thing she's ever held.

Good manners might dictate that he doesn't pressure her, like she had never pressured him to bare his heart to her, but by all the Gods and all the galaxies, he cannot take it any longer and he will pressure her, because the growing unease and the lump in his throat are unbearable.

Surprisingly, she breaks under just a whiff of pressure, like a dam breaking from the removal of a single log. Feys cups her cheeks like she cups his, exhaling a heavy breath against her mouth, blue eyes open and inquisitive. She knows that they're open, so she opens hers and immediately feels stinging wetness spill over her waterline. 

"Tell me?" Half a question, half a demand. Feyd's thumbs rub over the tears that dampen the soft skin beneath her eyes.

"It's gotten s-so so much worse," she removes one hand from his cheek, twists her head to cry into her palm, though Feyd's thumbs remain on her face.

"The… war?"

"Of course, the war! I'm scared that we won't make it out alive, Feyd." She gnaws her lip, closing her eyes. She's lying. She's lying and Feyd must never know her horrible lie.

"Are you still safe?"

"Relatively, yes." She shakes her head, swallowing. Feyd calms his own heart and breathing. That is the most important thing, but he doesn't feel all too well about that 'relatively'.

"Is that really true? You've been so tense. No, don't cry. Of course I noticed." Feyd releases her face, embraces her instead so she may sob into his shoulder.

"Yes, it is. I really am relatively safe. I mean… A few days ago, there was an airstrike a few kilometers to the north and a breach in, uh, in our bunker. But we found and fixed it quickly enough. I was only feeling sick for a day or two."

To describe the place as a mere bunker is such an offense, she feels her own heart shrivel. She needs to tell him, but she can't. Such a fucking coward, pathetic!

Meanwhile, Feyd soaks up every word. He so rarely gets to hear details about her waking life, details that he craves more and more but simultaneously loathes. A heavy frown forms on his forehead, mulling over her words until he only tastes bitter rot and fear on his tongue. If this is relatively safe, how could he accept that?

"I don't know if I can dream while I- while I-"

"While what?!" Feyd snaps when she stops before the crucial part. "Stop speaking in riddles, woman, tell me what's wrong!"

She cannot tell him, or he will despise her for her privilege. It is unfair. There is a reason why people like her are envied, despised and pitied. They are privileged cowards.

"I wish we were together," she swerves but confesses truthfully. But the rules are strict, so it can't be.

Feyd senses his woman slipping out of his fingers metaphorically, no matter how tightly he squeezes her dream-bound body.

"And if I came to save you?" Madly, his heart beats against his ribs and his palms grow clammy with anxiety. She laugh-sobs, like she thinks that's an endearing proposition. Obviously, she doesn't know the power Feyd holds in the same hands that are holding her right now.

"The air space is tight and the land routes are sealed. We, oh God, we… went to orbit yesterday. Even if you had a suitable craft, you would be blown to bits on the way."

Feyd's frown thickens and blue eyes flicker questioningly over his woman's back and shoulder, as her face remains hidden in his neck, clinging onto him with raw fear of judgment.

She adds: "But I c-can't deny, I wish I could have seen you with my own eyes and touched you with my own hands. Even if it's only once." She cries harder and wetness slips down Feyd's shoulder. He cannot bear to see her suffer for a second longer.

He is ready for the singularity to break out of the black hole. To know her personally, intimately and emotionally in the flesh, outside of their dreamland cocoon. He will find her. He will see her in real life and hold her in his real arms. She will love him, it won't matter to her who he is, not to his sweet woman who has learned so much about him, more than any human alive.

"Where are you from?" Softly and calmly he asks her and the lump in his throat dissolves at once. Liberation. He's finally made his decision and never felt better.

Sobbing softly, she names him a place followed by a second place he's never heard of. Maybe a country, maybe a city.

Feyd shakes his head. "No… My sweet, from which world are you? I will get you out of there. Believe me, I can." 

Her sniffling abates and she raises her head, tear-streaked face knitted with confusion. "What do you mean, which world?" 

"Are you toying with me?!" Feyd is not in the mood for jest, because every minute counts. As soon as he awakes, he will order her rescue, and if he has to pay House Harkonnen's entire fortune to the Guild to provide a heighliner to the most distant world. "What's the name of your planet, my darling, I'll come and get you, just tell me the name!"

"Earth?" The corners of her mouth quiver. "I think you're toying with me." And she can't blame him. Everything is already horrible enough.

"From which earth?" Feyd is growing annoyed with her. Does his woman not want to be found by him? What does she fear?! Has he not proven over and over how he craves her, how he loves her? Would she rather be reaped away by some planetal war than be with him?

"I don't understand you," she meekly admits with a tightness in her chest. "From which world are you?" She laughs a little, but her features are warped into horror, like something is knocking at her own house of cards.

"From Giedi Prime, of course! I am Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen, na-Baron of Giedi Prime!" Feyd slams his fist against the mattress. There, he's finally said it. He expects her to pull away from him with fear now and look at him the way every foreigner looks at him, envious and disdainful.

"I don't know what that means," she admits, voice warbled. Perhaps his darling is confused out of her mind, perhaps she didn't hear him correctly. So, Feyd cups her face firmly.

"That means I'll come and get you. Did you hear me? I am Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen." All those months he had feared her reaction if she ever found out his full name. Now he wants nothing more than what he had so feared, that spark of recognition, disdain or not.

"Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen," she whispers tearfully, trying to giggle like she did when she first heard his forename. "I like that silly name." Tenderly, she traces the shape of his jaw, smiling through the tears.

"You like…? No, listen to me closely. You said you're in orbit. Is there a heighliner near?" She squints her eyes, a flicker of a frown, and fresh tears well. She isn't listening to him!

"I-, I changed my mind, I'm not going. I'll go back down and find you. Tell me where you live!"

"No, no, no you won't go back down, you'll stay where you're safe and I'll come and get you." Feyd is repeating himself, frantic by now, clutching her face with his thumbs rubbing over her cheeks with increasing pace. "Just tell me where you are, please."

"Stop, stop!" She pleads. Feyd sounds out of his mind, confused. Bless his heart, but he can't come and get her. "Tell me, are you safe?" Aside from the obvious, his uncle… 

"Yes, I am-" Feyd doesn't get to finish his sentence because she sobs with relief, throwing her arms around his neck.

"I hope I can dream, I pray." How nice that would be. How comforting. She wants to believe it with her whole heart. "Will you be with me?" 

"I will always be with you."

How wrong he is.

"Can you hold me please? I am so sorry."

Feyd holds her, holds her so tight that he almost convinces himself her flesh, skin and bones are real, her beating heart is real, her soft voice is real. "Tell me where you are," he cries into her hair. "Tell me where you are, tell me where you are, tell me where you are."

Consciousness' meandering tendrils weave into the dream, dissolving it slowly like ink in water, gently, gently… Neither of them realizes as the other fades into mist among the stars.

After this night, Feyd-Rautha never dreams of his beloved again.

I stand amid the roar Of a surf-tormented shore, And I hold within my hand Grains of the golden sand – How few! yet how they creep Through my fingers to the deep, While I weep -- while I weep! O God! can I not grasp Them with a tighter clasp? O God! can I not save One from the pitiless wave? Is all that we see or seem But a dream within a dream? - A dream within a Dream by Edgar Allen Poe, 1850

Tag list: @nostalgichoya, @sebastianswallows, @forgedfromthestars

Do let me know if u want me to tag u 👉👈

A/N: All I can say is I'M SORRY 😩🤭 And - P.S. - There are at least 9 more chapters left to go, so be not afraid 🫂

[dilfismz]

gihun fluff and make out sessions please 🙏 i love him ugh

Stargazing

Pairing: Gi-hun x reader

Summary: Gi-hun takes you out on a surprise date, ready to reveal his feelings. Although you've only been together a few months he can't deny the strong feelings he has towards you.

A/N: No timeline is specified, it's ambiguous.

Life with Seong Gi-hun was like a series of unexpected detours—you never knew where he’d take you next, but it was always worth the ride.

You met him on a day when everything had fallen apart. Your job closed unexpectedly. You’d been sitting on a bench in the park, staring blankly at the papers that had to be signed, when a stranger sat beside you.

“Uh, do you want some hotteok?”

You’d blinked at him, startled.

He held up a bag of steaming pancakes, his awkward grin almost as warm as the food itself. “It’s, uh… really good. And you look like you could use something good right now.”

      *. ──── ❍  Δ □ ────*.

That day had changed everything. Seong Gi-hun wasn’t the kind of person you expected to fall for, but his honesty and endless optimism were magnetic. Over the months that followed, he’d become your rock, and somehow, you’d become his.

Tonight, he’d promised you something special. You didn’t know what, but you trusted him enough to go along for the ride.

“Okay, are you ready?” he asked as you walked out of your apartment building, his excitement palpable.

“That depends,” you teased. “What are you planning, exactly?”

He grinned, pulling you toward his car parked at the curb. “You’ll see. Just trust me.”

You got in, watching as he fumbled with a map he’d printed out.

“Gi-hun,” you said, raising an eyebrow. “Are we going somewhere that’s not on GPS?”

“Exactly!” he said proudly. “It’s a secret spot. You’re going to love it.”

The drive was longer than you expected, the city lights giving way to quieter suburbs and eventually open countryside. Gi-hun filled the silence with stories about his childhood and terrible attempts at singing along to the radio.

“Okay, close your eyes,” he said as the car slowed to a stop.

“Close my eyes?” you asked skeptically.

“Trust me,” he said, laughing. “I promise it’s worth it.”

You complied, feeling the car come to a full stop before he helped you out. His hands were warm on yours as he guided you a few steps forward.

“Alright,” he said, his voice soft. “Open your eyes.”

When you did, your breath caught.

Before you was a wide, open field dotted with wildflowers, the sky above glittering with stars. In the middle of the field was a small picnic setup—blankets, pillows, and a basket lit by the soft glow of string lights wrapped around a nearby tree.

“Gi-hun,” you said, turning to him in awe. “This is beautiful.”

He scratched the back of his neck, looking shy. “I wanted to do something special. I know things have been… tough lately, so I thought we could use a night like this.”

Your heart swelled as you took his hand. “This is perfect.”

The two of you settled on the blanket, the night air cool but not uncomfortable. Gi-hun opened the picnic basket to reveal an assortment of snacks, including the hotteok he always insisted on bringing.

“You know,” you said, laughing as you bit into one. “I think you’re singlehandedly keeping the hotteok business alive.”

“And I’m not even sorry,” he replied, grinning.

The night passed in a haze of laughter and easy conversation. You shared memories of your favorite childhood adventures, swapped embarrassing stories, and debated the best constellations in the sky.

At one point, Gi-hun lay back on the blanket, pulling you down beside him.

“See that one?” he asked, pointing to a cluster of stars. “That’s Cassiopeia. She’s the queen.”

“Didn’t she get punished for being too vain?” you asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Hey, queens make mistakes too,” he said with a chuckle.

You rolled your eyes, but your smile lingered. “I guess that makes you the court jester.”

“Wow,” he said, feigning offense. “And here I thought I was your king.”

“Not with those dad jokes,” you teased, leaning your head against his shoulder.

He chuckled, his hand finding yours. The silence that followed was comfortable, the two of you simply soaking in the moment.

“Hey,” he said after a while, his voice quieter. “I need to tell you something.”

You turned to him, your brow furrowing. “What is it?”

He hesitated, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of the blanket. “I know I joke around a lot, and maybe I don’t always say things the way I should, but… you’re the best thing that’s happened to me. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’m really, really glad you’re here.”

Your chest tightened, his words hitting you harder than you expected.

“Gi-hun,” you said softly, reaching up to touch his cheek.

He turned to you, his gaze meeting yours. For a moment, neither of you said anything. Then he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a kiss that was tentative but deeply heartfelt.

You responded without hesitation, your hands sliding up to his shoulders as the kiss deepened. It wasn’t rushed or frantic—just a slow, deliberate exchange that left you both breathless.

You move to straddle him, knees on each of his sides. Gi-hun blushes in surprise and tangles his hands in your hair, earnestly pushing you back towards him, connecting your mouths. The fingers on your right hand pull on the bottom of his shirt, while your left shoots up to stroke his curly hair. 

He groans into the kiss, hands now moving to your sides, squeezing slightly. When you let out a small whine Gi-hun cracks a smile and you feel his lips contracting during the movement, causing you to smile as well. 

When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, a small smile playing on his lips.

“You’re amazing,” he murmured.

“So are you,” you replied, your fingers still curled in his shirt.

He kissed you again, this time shorter but no less meaningful, before pulling you into his arms. The two of you lay there beneath the stars, wrapped in each other’s warmth.

As the night wore on, you drifted into a peaceful silence, the occasional sound of crickets filling the air. You traced patterns on Gi-hun’s chest with your fingers, a contented smile on your lips.

“Thank you for this,” you said softly.

He pressed a kiss to your hair. “Thank you for everything.”

And as you lay there in the middle of the quiet field, you realized that with Seong Gi-hun, even the simplest moments could feel like magic.

[flooffybits]

Wish You Were Closer

Idol: Jennie Kim (Blackpink)

Fate will always be a tricky fellow. Sometimes you either run from it or take the opportunity.

Word count: 2.9k

Warning: past relationships, angst, sad jennie, ambiguous ending, hurt reader, brief panic attack

☕buy me a coffee☕

A/N: soooooo remember that poll where you all voted for Jennie?

Staring at the text on her phone screen for what seemed to be five minutes, the rapper silently wishes that the message changes or a follow up joke comes in, but there's none of that and she's only left to give an affirmative to the request.

It wasn't like she had a choice either way.

“Hey, everything alright?"

Looking up, the brunette frowns before passing the phone for her older member to see.

Squinting, the actress reads the content before her mouth slowly forms into a small o before she's looking back up at her friend. “... will you be okay, Jennie?”

It's a dumb question, they both know, but Jennie only chews at her lower lip as she tries to think of all the possibilities this scenario would go through.

"I don't know. What if they don't agree? Will they change my partner?” 

In hindsight, that would be much better and less stressful, but Jisoo knows it was unlikely.

"The performance is a month away. I'm sure you can pull it off.” But seeing the look on the older woman’s face, the brunette wasn't so sure if it really was a good idea.

..

"It's so good to see you two. I'm sure you already know about each other and I know that you'll be the perfect match for this performance.” The dancer clapped happily while Jennie stood awkwardly to the side, eyes trained in front of her to ignore the third person in the room for as long as she could.

"The fans will eat this up for sure." The dancer cheers before he's waving his hands. “Come on, Y/n, no need to be so awkward. Relax." The man claps you on the shoulder, laughing before he's gently shaking your arms in an attempt to soothe your nerves, but your expression gives nothing away as you stare at him.

He only rolls his eyes in good nature. “Okay, so before we go ahead and start preparing for the dance, I'm going to let the two of you get to know each other better so we can build your chemistry."

Jennie winces a little when she sees the way your eyes narrow. It makes her ten times more uncomfortable as she fidgets with her fingers.

Chemistry.

She doubts that you'd have that together. Not after the history you both shared.

And almost as though she were being mocked, music blared through the speakers though it wasn't loud enough for her to not hear either you or the dancer.

“We’ll bring some spice into this so behave~” He teases before jogging off to one side of the room, grabbing his phone to try and see what steps he could come up with.

With the lyrics of Closer by The Chainsmokers echoing inside the practice room, you can't help but roll your eyes while Jennie bites her lip, hoping to somehow start a conversation for the sake of this performance.

“So…” Rocking on her feet, she silently curses herself for being so out of her element at that moment. "You've been pretty busy lately.” She comments and you don't even spare her a glance when you start to stretch your legs. "Doubt it's as busy as you.” You answer curtly and her lips pressed together, pouting slightly before she averted her gaze to the floor.

“I guess so-"

“We don't really have to talk." You're quick to cut her off when you stand back up, now stretching your arms. “It's just a dance. After that, we can go back to pretending the other doesn't exist." She bites her tongue to stop herself from retorting. Instead, she sucks in a deep breath before slowly nodding her head.

“Okay."

It hurt, but she wouldn't tell you that.

Just like before.

..

The second week rolls by and Jennie feels nowhere near motivated to go to practice today and spend another six or so hours with you. It wasn’t as though you were horrible, in fact you were pretty professional, going through the routine without an issue and acting as though everything was fine.

And that was her problem.

Jennie was anything but fine, not with having you so close where she can practically hear the sound of your breath as it teases her skin when you’re just too close to her. She’s not fine when she can smell the same cologne that you always used before you cut her from your life - the same smell that she would often look for in the shirts she used to have you wear, in the sheets of her bed until she decided it was time to let them go. She’s not fine when she can feel your heart beating just under her fingertips when the choreography tells her that she has to do it, just to remind her that you truly were in front of her and not just a figment of her imagination.

She’s not fine when she feels your warmth wrapped around her when all she knows is that your heart was wrapped in nothing but ice because of her. She hates the way you stare at her like she means something to you while you’re dancing because she knows it’s all an act for the performance.

It wasn’t real.

“Unnie, have you tried talking maybe?” Chaeyoung knows that it’s a sensitive topic, but seeing the distress on the older woman’s face urged her to ask. Maybe they could think of a way to help.

Blinking slowly, Jennie shakes her head while letting out a breath. “Y/n always makes sure to leave before I can even try.” She grimaces when she remembers calling your name once, only to see your back facing her before you had shut the door behind you. “Even during breaks?” The Australian inquires and the rapper only shakes her head once more. “They’re making it very obvious that they don’t want to talk to me.” She says softly and Lisa frowns from her side before crossing her arms. “How are you even managing to do a dance like this if neither of you are talking to each other?”

Honestly? Jennie didn’t know the answer either.

It just felt like a long forgotten rhythm that both of your bodies merely remembered after years of being locked away. And as soon as the song played, it naturally came out.

“Can we talk?" She knows it's a long shot, but she was growing desperate. Despite knowing you'd rather be anywhere but here, the words come out of her mouth before she can even think when you already have your back to her.

"If you didn't want to be around me so much, why did you agree to do this?”

There's silence when you pick up your phone and the rapper doesn't even realize that she's held her breath until you finally turn around to look at her.

"If I knew it was you, I wouldn't be here.” You state simply but it's not enough as she persists. "Then how about after we met? Before we started practicing? Why didn't you back out?"

"Because I don't give up.”

Your tone cuts through her and Jennie’s mouth winds shut when your gaze pierces her soul. It's filled with so much raw emotion that she almost suffocates.

“I wanted to turn back as soon as I found out it was you I was being paired up with, but that would only make me a coward. When I do things, I make sure to get the job done even when it's killing me."

She says nothing more as you finally turn on your heel, grabbing your things to leave once more, but at the last possible second, she finds her voice again.

“I'm so sorry for what I did." Her voice is so soft, so delicate that you most likely didn't hear her, but seeing the way your hand stops on the knob is a clear indication that you heard her loud and clear. “I never meant to hurt you, but I just-"

“You didn't mean to… but you did it anyway so you could focus on yourself. It doesn't change what happened." You cut her off in a low tone. “It takes you four years before telling me that you're sorry? Only because we happen to be in the same space?" You turn to face her again and Jennie feels so small under your stare. “If you were sorry you would have tried a little sooner."

“I couldn't-"

“-risk your career.” You finish for her with a cold look. “You already made your decision, but a single call or text wouldn't have hurt." You spat bitterly, letting your calm facade break for a moment as you finally allowed your emotions to reach its peak. “I would have understood, but you left me all alone like I was a toy that you were done playing with, Jennie. You made me look like an idiot, embarrassing me like that and for what?”

Jennie’s lips pursed together as she listened to you rant, feeling her heart thumping against her ribs as the ache spread throughout her body.

She never meant to abandon you. But she felt as though if she were to keep communicating with you after the breakup she would eventually cave and run back to you. That would ultimately put the two of you in a difficult position that could throw all your hard work away.

“I'm sorry… “ Is all that she can really utter out and you just shake your head. "It's a little too late for that."

And with just a few steps, she was all alone in the practice room again.

She wonders if this is how you felt when she left you all those years ago or was it worse than this?

..

“You mean… they just left?” Jisoo asks with furrowed brows and Jennie nods while hugging her knees to her chest. “I don't blame them though… I fucked up.” She's ashamed of what she's done. She hates herself for the decisions she's made in the past.

If only she were wiser.

But she was just a kid in love when it all happened. When she thought she was doing what was right then, she realizes it's different now that she's older.

“They're right though. If I had just… been more mature about it, maybe they wouldn't hate me like this.”

"Come on, unnie, I don't think they hate you.” Chaeyoung cuts off her troubled rant. "Y/n is hurt like any other person out there. And from what you've told us, you're basically their first everything.” She adds on, Lisa nodding as the light haired female continued. "If they did hate you, they would have asked to be replaced for this performance you're both having."

Jennie's frown only deepens at that. "They're committed." Is all she can say and Lisa sighs in exasperation. “Unnie, put in a little more effort! The whole reason you guys really broke up is because neither of you decided to. You broke up with Y/n because it was easier-”

"It wasn't-”

"And they just accepted it because of whatever reason, I don't know. Did you bother asking?” Jennie goes quiet when the maknae continues. “If this so-called relationship really meant anything to both of you, you guys would have done at least something instead of giving up the way you both did.”

Jisoo looks at the brunette with a small nod. “They're right, Jennie. We get that we make mistakes, but this just shows how neither of you were actually ready for a real relationship.” She added, causing the rapper to sink further in her seat. "How can I ask them when they avoid every conversation that isn't about the performance?"

The two maknaes share a look, silently communicating through their eyes before nodding their heads.

“Leave it to us."

Jennie isn't sure what the pair were scheming, even Jisoo couldn't guess what they were up to, but whatever it was, she trusted that they would be of help and not the other way around.

Serious times often forced them into serious minds.

However Jennie was not prepared to be shoved in a recording booth with you like some high schooler. She could only mentally curse at her two friends before she heard your voice.

“Is this supposed to be some sort of prank?" The disdain is laced into your tone and Jennie panics at the small space between you. “I've been locked in here for nearly fifteen minutes." Jennie's eyes widen before she's shaking her head. “I swear I didn't do anything."

Spinning on her heel, the brunette quickly knocks on the door while trying to pry it open. “Guys! Let us out!" But you're both only met with silence, leaving the two of you alone and Jennie can feel the panic setting in. She tried desperately to pry the door open but that only proved to be futile when it barely even budged.

“Seriously you guys, this isn’t funny!” Sensing the anxiety in the woman’s voice, you purse your lips together before letting out a sigh and reaching out, hand coming in contact with her shoulder before the rapper flinches. “Jennie, calm down.”

But as she turned to look at you, you can't help the worry that sets in when you see the look on her face.

“You need to take a breath.” You know about her anxiety and the panic attacks, so you let your defenses fall as you gently tug her away from the door and sit her on the only stool inside the room. “You’re fine. They’ll let us out eventually.”

You were talking to her.

Even as embarrassing as the situation was, you were actually talking to her.

“I…” But her voice is stuck in her throat as her hands tremble. She was more terrified than elated. This method was far beyond what she wanted, even if it did manage to bring you closer to her.

Seeing the way her hands begin to shake, you mentally curse before carefully reaching for them, doing your best to ground her back to reality. “I need you to breathe." You say sternly, making eye contact with her in an attempt to catch her attention. Fortunately enough, the contact is enough to do just that and her eyes are connecting with yours.

She follows your breathing pattern, watching the rise and fall of your chest until she's hearing you more clearly. By the time you notice that she's more than calmed down, you finally take a step back to give her another once over.

“You know this is very high school for your members to do.” You can't help saying as you cross your arms over your chest and Jennie is able to gather her bearings before she finally looks at you. “I promise you, I had no clue that they were going to do this.” She swears wholeheartedly and you can see it in her eyes that she absolutely means it.

Sighing, you just shake your head and turn away. “I'm assuming they're aware and this is their form of an intervention?” Her silence is all the answer that you needed. “You know that what happened between us can't happen again.”

She definitely wasn't expecting you to finally talk to her, but something in her comes to life and she quickly shakes her head. “It doesn't have to be.” You look at her in confusion. “We don't have to go back to the way things were. We can be better.”

“Jen-”

“Please.” She knows if she doesn't say what she has to say, she might not get another chance like this again. “Please let me make it up to you. Please let me treat you better.”

She can see the emotions shifting in your expression this time. Your walls are cracking the longer you're together like this. She just needs a little bit of a push.

“Why now?” Your voice is barely a whisper when your shoulders grow slack. “I don't think I can go through that again.” You quietly admit and Jennie sucks in a deep breath as she takes a small step closer to you. “I promise I've changed.”

“If you feel like I'm lying then you can cut me from your life. You'll never hear from me ever again.”

It's not as though your life wasn't already like that before this performance, but you knew Jennie. And if she aims to simply be a ghost from your past then she will make that promise come true.

She knows it in herself that if you tell her no, then she'll walk away. But deep down she hopes that she can mend the connection you've both lost or at least make a new one.

Seconds tick by as you stare at the brunette, apprehension clear on your face as you try to weigh the pros and cons of letting her back in. The tension between you is palpable and Jennie fidgets in place the longer you don’t say anything.

She doesn’t know what’s going through your head anymore.

She used to be able to read you like an open book, but you were different now.

And so was she.

“My name is Jennie.” She finally says after sucking in a deep breath and extending a hand in your direction. “I hope we can get to know each other better.”

She holds her breath when you stare at her hand, registering her actions before realization soon falls upon your face. She isn’t sure what to think, but when you slowly lift your head to look at her, she sees the way your eyes soften a little before carefully taking her hand in yours.

“Y/n. It’s… nice to meet you.”

[librababe99]

Storms of Vengeance

cw: MDNI, 18+, Young! Erik Lehnsherr Mutant! Reader, emotional and psychological manipulation, sexual themes, toxic relationships Word count: 1.6K Summary: You're a powerful weather mutant, caught in the magnetic pull of Erik Lehnsherr, a man consumed by his vision of mutant supremacy. As the storm rages around you, so does the undeniable tension between you both. Will you join him in shaping a new world, or will you resist the storm within and unleash your vengeance?

A/N: Alright no one asked for this.. BUT i'll be honest if young! Charles doesn't have a grip on me its definitely Erik <3 Also yes, I gave the reader similar powers to Ororo (love her btw!). I felt like it worked perfectly, adding to the complexity and moral ambiguity of two powerful individuals "falling in love". I use that loosely...lol...

(Marvel Masterlist)

The wind howled, whipping against your skin as you stood at the edge of the cliff. Below, the ocean churned violently, black waves crashing against jagged rocks. Thunder rumbled overhead, as if the heavens themselves were embroiled in the war that had just taken place. You could still taste blood in the air, feel the adrenaline that had carried you through the battle coursing through your veins.

But the fight wasn’t over. Not yet.

Erik Lehnsherr stood behind you, his presence as heavy as the storm that surrounded you both. He hadn’t said anything since the skirmish ended, but you could feel his eyes on you, as constant and unrelenting as the rain that soaked your clothes. You were a mystery to him, and that made you dangerous.

He had always been drawn to power—first for survival, then for vengeance. And now, his hunger had evolved into something far more insidious: domination. You were his equal in power, though neither of you had admitted it. He could command metal, bend the very earth around him with a flick of his wrist. You commanded the weather—thunder, lightning, wind, and rain—your power could rip apart the sky itself.

It was no coincidence that a storm brewed when the two of you were near. The atmosphere mirrored the tension, the volatile energy that sparked between you. But there was something more beneath the surface, something neither of you wanted to acknowledge.

“Another victory,” Erik said, his voice cutting through the wind. He stepped closer, his tall frame casting a long shadow even in the dim light of the storm. “Another step toward our cause.”

The "cause." It was all Erik ever spoke of. The Brotherhood, mutant supremacy, his grand vision of a new world where mutants ruled and humans bowed before them. But there was something in his tone tonight that unsettled you.

You turned to face him, your eyes narrowing as lightning flashed across the sky, illuminating his face in stark relief. His sharp features looked even more dangerous in the half-light, his eyes glinting like steel.

“Is that all this is to you?” you asked, your voice low but strong, cutting through the wind and rain. “Another victory? Another step toward a war you can’t win?”

Erik’s lips curled into a cold, humorless smile. He stepped closer still, his boots sinking into the wet earth. You could feel the magnetic field radiating from him, pulling on the metal debris scattered around the battlefield. Even the earth seemed to respond to his will.

“We are winning, my dear,” Erik replied smoothly, his eyes gleaming. “The humans are crumbling. Their resistance is futile, and soon they will be nothing more than relics of a past we will bury. You’ve seen it yourself—how they flee before us. They know their time is up.”

You clenched your fists, feeling the storm respond to your growing frustration. The wind picked up, swirling around the two of you, and rain lashed harder against your skin. The clouds above thickened, rolling in darker and more menacing than before.

“And you think that’s victory?” you demanded, stepping toward him, closing the gap between you. “Killing them? Burning their cities? Is that the future you want for our kind?”

Erik’s eyes flashed with something dangerous, something dark and cold that made your breath hitch. He reached out suddenly, his gloved fingers brushing against your cheek, and despite the chill in the air, his touch was almost warm.

“What I want,” Erik said, his voice soft but filled with a dark intensity, “is a world where our kind is no longer hunted. A world where we are no longer afraid. And I will destroy anyone who stands in the way of that future.”

His fingers lingered on your skin, and you felt a pull—like gravity, like the storm itself was reaching out to you, as though Erik’s very presence had somehow woven itself into the tempest. Your pulse quickened despite yourself, and the heat between your bodies grew, like a fire stoked by the raging winds.

“I know you feel it,” Erik continued, his hand slipping to your jaw, forcing you to meet his gaze. His voice was lower now, more intimate. “You know what we could achieve together. You’re powerful—more powerful than you let on. I’ve seen it in the way the skies bend to your will, the way the winds obey your command. We could be gods, you and I. Or…” He leaned in closer, his breath hot against your ear. “Or you can remain my most dangerous weakness.”

You inhaled sharply, the tension between you palpable. His words wrapped around you, tightening like a vice. You knew what he was offering. Power. Partnership. A future forged in fire and blood. Erik wasn’t just asking you to join him—he was asking you to surrender to him. To let him in, to allow the force of his vision to consume you.

The storm surged around you, lightning cracking through the sky, illuminating the battlefield for a split second. You felt the storm respond to your emotions, the air thick with static, the winds howling in tandem with your inner turmoil.

Could you trust him? Could you stand beside him, knowing the darkness that lived in his heart?

Erik’s hand tightened on your jaw, his thumb brushing your lips in a way that made your heart race. “You don’t have to be afraid,” he whispered, his voice softening. “You and I, we’re the same. We’ve both been broken by this world. But together, we can remake it.”

Your mind screamed at you to resist, to fight back, to remind him that you weren’t his to command. But your body—your body betrayed you. There was something intoxicating about Erik’s power, something magnetic about the way he looked at you, as if you were the only thing that mattered. The storm outside paled in comparison to the storm inside you.

“I’m not afraid of you,” you whispered, your voice shaky, betraying the emotions swirling inside. “But I will not be your pawn.”

Erik’s eyes darkened, his hand sliding down from your jaw to your neck, his fingers wrapping around your throat in a possessive grip. It wasn’t tight enough to hurt, but the promise was there, the unspoken threat lingering in the air between you.

“Who said anything about being a pawn?” Erik murmured, his lips dangerously close to yours. “I don’t want to control you. I want to unleash you.”

The storm intensified, lightning striking the ground dangerously close to where you both stood. The rain beat down harder, as if nature itself was crying out in protest to the madness that surrounded you. But all you could focus on was Erik—his eyes locked onto yours, the heat of his body pressing against yours.

Your breaths came in shallow gasps as Erik’s thumb brushed the sensitive skin of your throat, his other hand resting against your waist. The tension was unbearable, the storm inside you colliding with the storm outside. You knew that once you gave in, there would be no turning back.

In that moment, something inside you snapped.

Without thinking, you grabbed Erik’s hand, pulling him closer, your lips crashing against his in a kiss that was as violent as it was desperate. The storm answered in kind, thunder booming overhead, lightning splitting the sky in jagged streaks of white-hot energy. Erik responded immediately, his arms wrapping around you with a possessive hunger, as if he had been waiting for this moment as long as you had.

His lips were cold at first, but they warmed quickly, the heat between you building until it felt like the storm wasn’t just around you but within you. Erik’s hands were everywhere—on your waist, on your back, in your hair—each touch sending shockwaves through your body.

You pushed against him, forcing him back toward the cliff's edge, the rain-soaked ground slippery beneath your feet. He let you lead, let you push him, but you both knew he could stop you at any moment if he wanted. This was his power, his control, but for now, he let you have the illusion of it.

When you finally broke the kiss, your chest was heaving, and Erik’s eyes were blazing with something dark and primal. The storm raged around you both, rain drenching your clothes, but neither of you cared.

Erik’s hand tightened on your waist, pulling you flush against him as he whispered in your ear, “Do you see it now? The power we could wield together?”

You bit your lip, trying to ignore the way his words made your heart race, made your blood sing with the temptation of it. You could feel the storm inside you reaching a breaking point, a chaotic force begging to be unleashed.

“I see it,” you admitted, your voice barely audible over the wind. “But I don’t trust you, Erik.”

His grip on you tightened, his eyes narrowing. For a moment, you thought he might pull away, might lose the facade of control. But then, a slow, dangerous smile spread across his face, and he leaned down, his lips brushing against your ear.

“Trust is irrelevant,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with dark promise. “What matters is power. And you, my dear, have more of it than you realize.”

Before you could respond, Erik’s hand shot out, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you into another kiss—this one rougher, more demanding. His teeth grazed your lip, and you gasped into his mouth, feeling the raw intensity of his desire radiating from him like heat.

He wanted you—body and power alike. The realization hit you like a punch to the gut, the weight of it settling deep in your chest.

[orions-choker]

Bitter Water (Siren! Jason Newsted x Reader NSFW)

Siren! Jason Newsted, Cum Eating, Ambiguous Ending, Voice Kink

Word Count: 4,205

Reader is drawn towards the seas tender embrace and the sweet song of a pretty boy on the shore.

(Cross posted to AO3, the third installment of my Metallica Monsters collection.)

The taste of salt hung heavy in the air, cool against the skin was the breeze bouncing off the murky waves. The beach was rocky, jagged and unnerving. Nothing like the white sand and crystal clear waters Y/N was used to back home. “Tell me again why we came here instead of somewhere like Miami?” She complained, pulling her jacket tighter around her body as she turned to her friend.

Her eyes drifted across the horizon line, it was a clear enough day, yet fog danced low across the ground. “C’mon it's like a fun spooky adventure.” Her best friend's voice chimed as she slowly crawled down the embankment. Y/N eyed her cautiously, surely there had to be better ways to get down to the beach than that?

“We can’t even swim here.” Y/N grumbled once more, despite this she followed her friends pathing, sliding down the dirt as she tumbled onto the small beach. Waves lapped at the shore, tide pulling in and out leaving a wet sheen against the rocks. “This feels like there should be a lighthouse here and an angry fisherman.” Y/N crouched down, hands grazing against a small stone that seemed to glean in the few rays of sunlight.

The rock seemed out of place amongst the dark gray stones. It shimmered a brilliant turquoise color, flecks of white and dark blue spattered amongst it. It seemed almost as if it emanated its own light. Curiously she scooped it into her palms, cupping it around its eye to test its glow in the dark properties. “Hey! Come look at this!” Y/N called out to her friend excitedly. She pulled away, handing it to the other girl. “Have you ever seen a glow in the dark stone?”

When not focused on the stone, Y/N’s gaze seemed to drift towards the sea each time. Her eyes wandered as the girl inspected the stone for herself. “No way, that's so cool, it has to be fake though right?” She asked Y/N as she handed it back. Y/N nodded slowly, rolling the stone between her fingers. Her eyes caught onto something in the water. Surfacing to the shore a dark black mass slithering its way through the waves. Her eyes widened in surprise.

“Big fucking fish.” Y/N declared, pointing towards the sight with her empty hand. She stood up, daring to step closer to the water as she attempted to get a better look. “Sturgeon maybe?” She questioned. Suddenly the water danced at her feet and she jumped back in surprise. Had she gotten that close to the water so fast?

There were hands on her shoulders, tugging her back onto the beach. “Woah there Y/N, don't go walking into the ocean on me.” Her friend's laughter crackled through the heavy air. “What if it's a shark that wants to eat you.” She teased, steering Y/N back towards the incline that led up to the road once more.

Y/N rolled her eyes as she climbed back up to the pavement. “Sharks rarely attack people, you know?” She scoffed. As her feet hit sturdy ground once more Y/N realized she still had the stone clutched tightly in her hand. She smiled softly at it, shoving it gently into the front pocket of her jacket. “C'mon, where's this waterfront hotel you booked us?” She followed the other girl further down the road.

The hotel was old, A sprawling old property, three stories and painted with a peeling white paint. The beach it inhabited was much more like the ones Y/N was accustomed to, more sand less stone. Still the water didn’t look even a bit more enticing. She frowned at the sight. This vacation was becoming more and more disappointing each moment she stayed in this sad seaside town.

Her room impressed her only moderately more. It was clean at the very least, a large balcony door that led her directly out to the beach. She stepped forwards to the large doors and pulled back the billowing white curtains. The waves seemed more aggressive now as she looked out into the ocean, dark storm clouds were on the horizon. Her eyes narrowed in on an odd movement, there she saw the tail of a large fish peak from above the waves and sink down below once more. She gasped in astonishment, that was bigger than most fish you would see along the shoreline.

Patiently she watched once more for a glimpse of this beast, but it never came. She stopped back from her door, pulling the curtains closed once more as she shed her clothing for the day. A long afternoon of traveling meant an early night. Reaching into her pocket she pulled the stone once more, rubbing her thumb across the smooth surface in admiration. She placed it gently on the old wooden nightstand. She stepped into her long nightgown, shivering at the cool breeze that seemed to penetrate the flimsy walls against her bare skin.

The bed was hardly anything to write home about, a little bit too stiff against her back but nothing she couldn't power through, especially not with how tired she was. Exhaustion radiated in each of her bones as she rested her head against the flat pillow. The gentle whooshing of the waves outside served as a fantastic white noise as she surrendered to sleep.

Y/N’s slumber lasted only a short while though. She awoke to the gentle light of the moon dancing across her walls in the shape of the ebbing water. More surprisingly she was stirred by the sound of low melodic singing carried across the air. Confused, she swung her legs over the side of her bed, the wood freezing against the soles of her feet. She shuffled to her sliding door, peeking outside into the dark. As she got closer the louder the singing began.

There, laying casually at the waterline, backlit by the moon was a man. From here she could make out his shirtless form, wild curly hair splayed out beneath him. Her brows furrowed as she squinted for a better look. Her body seemed to move on its own as she pressed the lock open, quietly sliding the door open.

The sand was soft between her toes as she stepped out, the singing grew louder yet. Wind whipped against her legs, jostling the light material of her nightgown. Y/N couldn’t make out any of the words the man sang, a language foreign to her ears yet full of emotions she knew by heart. Wanting, longing, yearning. She took a few more steps forward, he seemingly lay partially in the sea, from his hips down engulfed in the dark water. Perhaps he was hurt? One more step forward and abruptly the soft melody ceased, his head snapped towards her, too far away to make out his features but she could see his body stiffen in surprise. He moved, shifting his body weight onto his hands, ready to push himself up and run.

“Wait!” She called out, the words leaving her without a second thought. She took a long stride forward, hand outreached towards him. She could see his face now, gleaming under the moonlight. He was handsome, strong jawline, slightly squared chin, deep set blue eyes. His hair a wild mane of reddish-brown curls. Just as soon as she saw him he was gone, slipping beneath the waves in one swift movement.

She yelped, running into the sea in a panic, the water rose to her calves, dampening the hem of her gown. In the distance she saw it again, the dark slithering of a large fish, moving away from her quickly. Her heart pounded in her chest as she looked out. No signs of the man who had been here just a moment before. The tides were not strong enough to suck a person down below the depths like that, had he been attacked by something?

Soon the freezing water against her skin was too much to bear, she backed up, sand sticking to her wet skin as she walked back towards her room. Looking cautiously over her shoulder to the water once more. There, just for a moment she saw something once more. Peeking from below watching her, those eyes, that hair. It dipped down slowly, fully submerged as she stumbled back into her room.

In a haze she stepped into her bathroom, running the tub to wash the evidence of her excursion from her skin. She watched curiously, the sand and dirt swirling down the drain as the water rinsed her clean. She didn’t catch another moment of sleep that night, her head resting against the pillow, staring out across the beach, desperate for another sign of what she had just witnessed.

Y/N watched the sun rise slowly into the sky, unmoving from her position until there was a gentle rapping at her door. “Holy crap you look like shit.” Her friend's voice greeted her as Y/N opened the door. “Couldn’t sleep?” She asked sympathetically.

“No.” Y/N mumbled in response, rubbing at her heavy eyes. She moved to the side, allowing the girl into her room as she closed the door behind them. “Could really use some breakfast.” She didn’t elaborate further on her sleepless night, knowing the disbelieving reaction her friend would give her. She stepped out of her sleepwear and into another long flowing summer dress, a deep blue color that swirled around her in a breathable fabric.

With a grin her friend dragged her from the room. “Well you’re in luck, eggs benny is on the menu this morning in the restaurant.” She informed Y/N. The restaurant in question was more akin to a hole in the wall diner on the main floor of the hotel. It was surprisingly busy, filled with mostly old couples and the occasionally family unit. In the corner booth Y/N nursed a warm milky tea as her friend aimlessly chattered on about today's itinerary. Her eyes glazed over as she looked across the diner, she prodded lazily at her hashbrown, moving them around her plate in disinterest. “You know, you shouldn’t play with your food.” A soft voice came from behind her. She watched as her friends eyes widened and sparkled with interest first before she turned around to entertain the man,

She was stunned into silence at the person she was greeted with. Unmistakably it was the man from the beach last night, his hair tamed and pulled back into a ponytail, a red flannel covering his chest, sleeves rolled up his arms. Her mouth gaped open like a dying fish. Before she could say anything her friend piped up. “Oh oh my gosh hi!” She introduced herself quickly, tucking her hair behind her ears with a flirtatious bat of her eyelashes. Y/N couldn’t blame her, he was one of the most enticing men she had ever laid eyes on. “And this is Y/N!”

Y/N blinked at the mention of her name, quickly snapping her mouth shut and holding her hand out in greeting. “Jason, nice to meet you gals.” The man, Jason, greeted them, shaking their hands kindly. “What brings you here?” He asked, striking up a casual conversation.

The other girl took the lead, Y/N still in a stunned stupor as she watched Jason speak, his gentle laugh as melodic as his singing. She was positive that was out there last night. The whole interaction had seemed so other worldly that she nearly hadn’t believed it was real. She found herself drawn into the way he spoke, luring her in gently.

“It was a pleasure talking to you two, see you around.” His farewell snapped Y/N out of her trance. Panic rose as she watched him walk away, she needed to ask him what last night was all about. Quickly she excused herself from the table, ignoring her friends' protests. She all but ran to catch up with the other man.

“Hey wait up, Jason!” She called out to him, following him outside the doors of the hotel. Her hand grasped onto the back of his shirt as she stopped him. He turned around, eyeing her expectantly. “I saw you, last night, you disappeared.” She tried her best to explain between short breaths.

He smiled at her, lips pulling back to reveal sharp teeth. “You did.” He confirmed with a nod. “You have something of mine by the way.” He hummed, leaning down closer to her face. His eyes seemed to trail across her skin. “Bring it back to me tonight please.” He asked sweetly before stepping away from her once more and turning his back to her.

Y/N was unable to move as she watched him walk away, as if she was under a spell until she could no longer see him. She shook her head in disbelief. Left with more questions than answers she returned to her confused friend in the diner. She couldn’t bring herself to answer any of the girls' probing questions as they paid for their breakfast and moved on.

Before they headed into town for the day Y/N felt compelled to return to her room, pocketing the glistening stone off her nightstand and tucking it away into her bag. The day passed by Y/N in a blur, countless trinket stores entered, mediocre lunch on the pier, a cover band that night at the local pub. There was only one thing on her mind. Jason. What did he mean to bring it back to him tonight? What was it that she had of his? Was this some weird ploy to lure her out and murder her? The sight of the hotel once more was almost an unwelcome one.

She stopped facing her friend. “You go on ahead inside for tonight, I think I want to take a walk along the beach before bed.” She assured her friend with a small smile and a wave, watching her disappear beyond the front doors before turning to the landscape before her. Her sandals sunk heavy into the sand as she wandered, the sky was dark, stars twinkling above her like fairy lights.

To her right Y/N heard a splash in the water, she turned to see nothing, yet still she felt compelled to walk towards the sound. Her eyes strained to make anything out in the dark as she approached the shoreline. This section of the beach was rockier, reminiscent of the first beach they had visited when they arrived. She stepped carefully across the jagged stones.

Then she heard it, the same low singing from the night before, ebbing and flowing, guided by the breeze to her ears. She followed it until she saw him again. Relaxing against a stone partially submerged beneath the waves. “Jason?” She called out curiously as she was pulled forward by an invisible force.

He turned his head lazily towards her, his damp curls caressing the side of his face as he grinned. His lips moved around the words of his song effortlessly. There beneath the water, the flick of an inky black tail, scales shimmering like an oil slick in the low light. Her eyes dropped to his lower half in awe and amazement. Words were lost on the tip of her tongue, and still her legs pulled her forward, deeper into the water.

Her dress floated around her waist as she approached him, only when she stood beside him did the hum of his song cease. She watched with wide eyes as he leaned over, hand dipping into her now soaking purse as he plucked the glimmering stone from its hiding place. Within his hands it seemed to glow brighter, casting a blue glow across both their faces.

“I lost this, thank you for finding it.” He whispered, snapping her from her trance. His eyes were kind as he grasped her hands within her own. “It would be really bad if I lost it.”

Y/N swallowed hard, hands shaking in his old, her eyes drifted back to his face stunned at his close proximity, his body curved towards her. “I…What are you?” She mumbled softly. She could feel the stone pressed against the back of her hand and it vibrated pleasantly as she spoke.

His laugh echoed off in the night like the chiming of bells. “Siren, Mermaid, Sea-Nymph.” He rattled off the mythological species. “Whatever you want to call me.” He shrugged. His hands dropped hers and she found herself grimacing at the loss. “And this pretty little thing is the source of my entire being.” He held up the stone once more before slipping it into the small wire cage that hung from his neck.

“I'm sorry I took it.” Y/N apologized, eyes trailing from his neck down his chest, glistening with water, down his navel to the subtle v shape of his hip bones before it transitions to scales. Her mouth felt dry suddenly as she studied him. Deep within her she felt panic, confusion. But on the surface she felt soothed with each word Jason spoke to her.

He laughed again, shaking his head. “No, really thanks to you I found it, I probably wouldn’t have found it on my own.” He assured her. Gently his hand reached out, thumb stroking over her cheekbone tenderly. “I promise your help comes with reward.” He whispered, leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to her lips.

It was unexpected but not unwelcome, Y/N found herself eagerly returning the kiss. She leaned into his touch as his hands gripped her hips beneath the water, pulling her in deeper. She peered down curiously as he seemingly stood before her now. Where there was once scales was replaced with skin. She pulled back in confusion, her hands gripping onto his shoulders. “Is that something you can just do?” She asked breathlessly, gesturing down to where his tail once was.

Jason leaned forward, capturing her mouth with his own once again. “Yeah, when I feel like it,” He whispered against her skin, sending shivers across her skin. “Do you want this Y/N, I'm not using my voice against you, It’s all up to you.” Suddenly all her questions about the persevering feelings of being drawn to him were answered.

Still now, even without the added pressure of his enticement she found herself desperately wanting more of him. “Yeah, yes, please.” She affirmed. His hands moved to her shoulders, pushing the fabric of her sleeves down her arms allowing him to easily tug the dress down and free her breasts.

Y/N hissed at the sudden cool air against her nipples, pulling the skin taught. Jason hoisted her up, wrapping her legs around his waist as he moved to press her back against the rock he initially was resting against. Her lower half was lifted out of the water now, droplets running down her smooth skin as she was left exposed. The fabric of her dress was bunched around her waist as Jason leaned down once more to kiss her tenderly.

She placed her hands against his chest as she allowed herself to be completely enveloped by his loving touches. The calloused pads of his fingers moved across her body so gently it almost tickled, finally coming to rest on her spread inner thighs. They pulled away from each other breathlessly. His lips came to rest on the outer shell of her ear, “Beg for me,” He commanded her softly.

A high whine worked its way from deep within her as she felt his fingers inch dangerously closer to her heat. “Please Jason, I want you, want your fingers inside me.” She gasped, the words coming from her all on their own. She felt the tingle under her skin that she was coming to associate with his voice.

He grinned down at her, his thumb came to gently rub over her clit, eliciting a moan so loud it bounced across the water. A heat rose to Y/N’s cheeks as she heard it echo. “You sound so pretty.” He mumbled, kissing down her neck as he slipped a digit into her waiting hole. She sucked him in desperately. He curled his finger, rubbing against the soft spongy spot inside her. Her legs seized around him, back arching up off the jagged rock as she pushed her hips down onto his hand.

“Oh god, Jase’ please more.” She pleaded, her fingers digging into the skin of his shoulders as she clung to him. He complied easily, slipping a second finger inside stretching her out just that little bit more that left her mewling pathetically. “F-fuck.” She stuttered out.

With each curl of his hand, each press of his thumb against her clit she could feel with warmth unraveling from within her lower belly. “Cum for me.” Jason sucked at her collarbone gently, lapping at each bruise he made with his tongue. His next command had her release crashing over her. She came around his fingers, shaking in his hold as she pulled him closer, her head nestled between his neck and shoulder as she cried out softly.

Each breath she sucked in was shaky as she came down from the high, her body shivering as Jason pulled his fingers from her. He brought them up to her lips. “Open,” He spoke, prodding her lips apart as he pressed his fingers coated in her juices against her tongue. Obediently she lapped at them, sucking them clean with a moan. “Good girl,” He praised her with a smile.

Y/N pulled back with a pop, a string of saliva connecting her to Jason's fingers as she looked up at him, her pupils blown and fucked out. “Fuck me?” She asked him hopefully, rolling her hips down to seek contact with him. He raised his eyebrows with another grin.

“As you wish sweetheart.” He rubbed his thumb along her bottom lip. He reached down, grabbing the base of his cock to align himself with her dripping entrance. He rubbed the head against her swollen and abused clit. She hissed in response, body attempting to lean away from his touch but he held her steady in place. He chuckled lightly at her, reveling in the slightly annoyed glance she gave him.

Without warning her sunk into her, in one go fully sheathing himself, their hip bones pressed together as she yelped in surprise. He shushed her with a soothing whisper, pushing her damp hair behind her ears as he pressed a tender kiss to her forehead. “I got you, don't worry.” He sighed, content at the warmth surrounding him.

He rolled his hips against her, without pulling back, putting an intoxicating pressure against her walls and her clit simultaneously. “M’gonna move now, kay’?” He warned her before pulling back just a bit, pressing forward and back slowly. He moved like the ocean on a gentle day, pushing and pulling like the tide as he worked himself inside her. Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck, breathy moans escaping her each time he pushed forward. “Oh god, Jason.” She whined, tossing her head back. “Fuck, sing to me.” She asked. He stilled his movements in surprise. He stared down at her in awe.

“You want me to sing to you while I fuck you baby?” He asked teasingly, hands gripping tighter at her hips. He leveraged himself forward, thrusts becoming more desperate. He leaned forward, humming his song into her ear gruffly. His voice a little lower, choppier as he fucked into her. The melody had Y/N climaxing a second time, the vibrations of his voice against her skin sending her over the edge once more.

Her body went lax in his arms as he chased his own relief after her. Gasping out the final words of his tune as quickly pulled out, hand grasping his cock as he shot his load across her tummy. Hot spurts of cum coating her skin as his head dropped to her shoulder.

They breathed together, for a moment, the air silent around them as their heartbeats calmed. Y/N reached down, swiping at the release across her skin with her finger and bringing it to Jason's mouth. “Open,” She mimicked him with a giggle. He looked up at her from where he rested his head and parted his lips.

His tongue swirled around her finger, tasting his own fluids eagerly as he sucked the digit clean. He grinned up at her as he swallowed. She watched him in awe, one of her hands reaching up to tangle in his hair. “Thanks for the reward.” She tugged him up to kiss him once more.

They lay there for a long moment, in silence as the water brushed against the skin. Slowly the tide pulled them in deeper, Jason's hold on her body tightening as they sunk deeper and deeper beneath the waves. Locked onto Jason's lips, Y/N was unable to gasp for air as she was pulled under into the darkness, the last glimmer of light in her eyes the glowing stone around his neck.

[monster-mash-m]

Little snack

Mdni! 18+ only! Suggestive themes

Secret!Fem!vampire x Chubby!Afab!reader

Cw: reader has afab giblets, menstruation, mention of blood, strangers to lovers(?), marking, flirting, drinking, gender/race ambiguous!

Lemme know if I missed any!

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It’s been a long day, you just started your period, and your cramps and emotions were driving you up the bloody (haha- get it?-) wall. And of course it just had to be your friends birthday and of course she invited you out to a bar, you couldn’t exactly refuse could you?

So now, here you were. Sitting at a bar trying to ignore your cramps as you sip on an overpriced cocktail. You felt a pair of eyes on you. Your brows knitted together as you try to subtly look around, no one standing out. ‘You’re in public y/n of course people are gonna look at you.’ You roll your eyes to yourself but your indifferent look slightly lightens as you see your friend chatting up some guy. You smile softly, good for her.

“Why so lonesome?” A velvety voice spoke from next to you. You whip your head around to see a woman leaning on the bar to your left. “Uh what?” You asked taking time to process someone actually talking to you. “Why’s such a lovely sweet treat like yourself just sat at the bar, hm?” She asks as her eyes trail down your form as if she just wanted to eat you up. Her smirk, dangerous but alluring. “Oh I’m just not in the mood to party.” You hum back and take another sip of the cocktail.

“Oh no?” She raised a brow “it’s a shame, I bet your hips would look so good swaying to the music.” She grinned. This abrupt comment of course caught you off guard, making you choke a little on your drink. “O-oh-cough-uhm” you wipe your lips with an awkward smile. “I wasn’t expecting such a forward comment.” You reply sheepishly. She gave you an amused glance as she stared at your lips “hm, my bad, it’s been a while since I’ve had a good snack~” she practically purred, it’s as if she almost wanted to eat you.

Now you were stuck on a rock, this very attractive yet mysterious woman was clearly coming on to you. But for one you couldn’t just leave your friends party she probably wants to talk to you right now- oh and she’s just shouted that she’s getting laid walking out with a random dude, good for her-. Okay-another reason you should refuse, you’re menstruating, you wouldn’t want to disappoint this lady- “Do you have any plans tonight?” She hummed out leaning closer biting her lip, pulling you from your thoughts. Oh no, she’s hot!

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“Fuck-“ you gasp out as she pins you to her door that was slammed shut a second ago, one of her legs pressing between yours as she rocked it steadily. Her blood red lips assaulting your neck with hickies and kisses… she was feverish. “A-ah wait- hang on-“ you gasp out as you look up at her through ragged breaths “I-before we do anything uhm- I have… I’m on-“ you try to find the right words. “Your period?” She grinned as her hands trailed down to your plump hips and grasped them softly letting out a sound of satisfaction at the squish under her fingers.

You look at her in astonishment “what- how did you know?” She just simply chuckled lowly as her grip tightened and dove back into your neck to begin licking and sucking again “I smelt you as soon as you entered the bar…” she growled lowly. “Ugh gods… I haven’t fed for quite some time… you just smell so sweet, lemme have a treat yeah? Be a good snack for me?” She pleaded in a demanding tone. Oh. OH. It started to piece together in your mind. The sharp fangs, the aura of mystery, the cold as a corpse skin and the final part, the fact that she could smell your blood. You gulp as she slowly sinks to her knees. “Please?” She sighed out.

How could you refuse?

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Whoop whoop! First fic thingy is complete!

Definitely gonna make a pt 2, make it more spicyyyy, saucy even.

[1-800fandomqueen]

Murdered 1462

Vladislaus Dragulia x fem!reader

Part Two

WC : 3.7K

SW : No usage of "Y/N," physical appearance and details are left completely ambiguous and are up to interpretation. Mentions of witchcraft, verbal abuse, murder, canon-typical violence and story-line, pregnancy, death, etc.

If there are any more warnings to be added let me know!

This is a re-post, all of my old accounts were deleted.

“Born: 1422… Murdered: 1462.”

‘I was born into a noble family, my father was the duke of Hungary.’

Slipping into the more tame selection of your clothing, muting the sound of ruffling cloth as much as possible to not wake you lady-in-waiting, Agnes, who had fallen asleep whilst handling your linens. Once dressed, you throw a shawl over your head in any attempt to hide your identity. You’d been hated by the townspeople ever since you and your father had travelled here for business, the small-minded people of Transylvania already despised the idea of foreigners, but the idea of you and the rumor of the practice you brought along? Most claimed you to be a witch. But alas, even their hatred couldn’t extinguish your spirit.

Sneaking out had never been easier. 

You’d always been an adventurous person, something your father always chastised you for. He believed ladies should sit still, sit quietly, and sit pretty. He had an image to uphold, and he couldn’t have his only child galavanting around town, acting improper. He used to let you do as you please, but when the plague took your mother he became cold, harsh. 

Feeling the cold air hit your skin as you shimmy out the window and down the trellis until your shoes hit the ground with a small thud, making a small promise to yourself to be back before dawn. The entire grounds of the house were fenced in, with guards stationed at the main gate. You couldn’t exit out that way as they would stop you the second they saw you. But unbeknownst to them, you’d discovered a break in a part of the fence. Shimmying out the back, you begin the trek down the hill the house sits on to the village. 

~~~

‘It had been cold when I met him, when he saved me. If he hadn’t shown when he did, I fear I would have been no longer. ‘

“You can run but you can’t hide, witch!” You were growing tired, legs and feet burning with effort. When turning a corner in the marketplace you’d run into someone,  knocking the shawl off your head, revealing your identity. You’d garnered the attention of a group of particularly cruel drunkards, who began to hurl obscenities towards you. And before you could even blink, they began chasing you. You tried to throw them off, hoping all your time exploring would have given you enough of a terrain advantage. But the feeling of someone grabbing the back of your shawl and pulling you to the ground steals all your hope of getting away. 

Pain absorbs your back as you land hard and fast on the cold ground. The early morning dew seeps through your dress as the cold air fogs your breath as it leaves your lungs from the impact, the main perpetrator kneeling on your neck, cutting off your air supply. One of the other men wrapping your feet and hands with rope. Your ears rang as your head snapped back against a rock, vision going foggy. You couldn’t hear what the men were saying to you, only that they were taunting you. You were able to make out the blur of a mass of light coming towards you, and it was only when the heat brushed against your face could you tell it was fire. 

You tried to fight back, to struggle. But with the mans’ knee against your throat, the lack of oxygen was making you weak. As the black spots were so close to entirely filling your vision, the man suddenly lets off of you, and the heat of the fire goes away. You cough, rolling over onto your elbows and knees as you try to regain your breath. You can hear the men pleading to a deep voice for mercy, and then your vision returns in time to watch as they run away.

“Are you alright?” 

‘I didn’t even know his name, he wouldn’t give it to me. All I knew was that I was utterly captivated by him.’

The deep accented voice held your attention entirely, as the man attached to that voice crouched down next to you, a gentle hand placed on your back. “Madam? Are you alright?” Gasping out, feeling like your vocal chords are completely crushed, only able to choke out a small “yes.” The hand on the small of your back stays while one reaches to your left forearm, grabbing it to help you up. And when you stumble backwards, the firm body of the stranger is there to catch you. 

When you’ve regained your breath, and were able to stand on your own, you stepped away from the stranger. “Who are you?” gazing at the man before you and trying to map his features by only what you could see in the barely-there moonlight. You’ve decided by what little of him you could see, that he was still undoubtedly handsome. Slightly taller than you, possibly 6-foot, dark hair, and shockingly blue eyes. 

“Who I am is of no importance at the moment,” the deep voice jolting you out of your stupor, “But it is important to know why a group of beţivii (drunks) were attacking a young woman in the forest?” At the mention of your attack you feel the pain seep into your neck, adrenaline finally beginning to wear off. Letting out a cough as your hand comes to gently cup the base of your neck. “Well, Romanians tend to be quite wary of foreigners, and you’ve just bore witness to the fact that they don’t particularly like me.” your tone clipped, pulling a deep chuckle from the man. 

You feel blush overtake your visage as you realize how rude that sounded, embarrassment filling you at your rudeness to the man who saved you. “I’m sorry, I’m usually not this rude I swear, I’m still just a little frightened. Thank you, by the way, for coming to my aid. I’ll ask my father to make sure you’re rewarded for your valiant efforts.” The stranger ignores your apology and thanks, “Your father?” his head tilted to the side, pieces of hair falling across his face, “Yes my father, He’s the Duke of Hungary, we’re here on diplomatic business.” “Hmm, for what?” You falter and cover your mouth, giving the man an apologetic look. You’re relieved when he seems to pick up on what you’re implying, even though he gives you a dark, brief, look of knowing,  “I understand, trade secrets.” He says with a slight smile, holding out his arm. “Here, it’s almost dawn, let me accompany you back to wherever you’re staying.”

And with a small smile, you take his arm. 

‘I didn’t anticipate what would happen when I took his arm. That my world was about to turn, that taking his arm on that cold, damp, morning, signed my death.’ 

It was a lovely walk back, filled with small talk and pleasantries. When you approached the doors to the Governor’s house, you could hear the commotion before you saw it. When the stranger accompanying you opened the door, his right elbow still linked with your left, all the commotion suddenly came to a screeching halt. Several pairs of eyes turned to you, including those of Agnes, then the faces attached to all those eyes paled when they saw the man whose arm you still held. When your father called you towards him, a dark look in his eye, you felt the pit of your stomach drop. “Step away from him. “ Your father beckoned, he hadn’t looked this grim since the doctor in Hungary told him of your mothers fate. 

Swallowing in nervousness you look up to the man accompanying you only to find him already looking down at you, a rather downcast look in his eyes. Your father calls again, walking towards you. “Step away. Now.” You stare long and hard at the man by your side until he gently nudges you towards the others in the room. You failed to notice until you looked up that most of the guards in the room had their weapons aimed towards him. Stepping away from him you’re immediately met by your lady in waiting coming and sweeping you up the stairs. “Lock her in her room Agnes, until I call for her.” You throw one last glance towards the man to find him still staring at you. Turning the hall, Agnes gently pushes you into your room, and before she shuts the door behind you, the angry conversation from the foyer floods into the room. “What were you doing with my daughter, Impaler.”

‘I suppose it wasn’t a bad situation, after all I was quite taken with him, even if I didn’t know who he was at first. I didn’t fear him, even though everyone else did.’

It was what felt like hours before you heard a key being inserted in the lock of the door. Bounding up from the bed to be greeted by the sight of two guards when the door swung open. You weren’t able to utter a single word when you were grabbed by both arms and dragged away from your room, well actually the room belonged to your Stranger, in your time locked in you had discovered from Agnes that Vlad was the Military Governor of Romania, and that you and all the diplomats were currently residing in his house. 

Ironic how things work out. 

 When you asked where you were being taken you were met with utter silence, the guards only tightening their grip after you tried to pull away. Only feeling ease when the door to what you recognize to be the master study of the house was yanked open and you were promptly thrown in. 

Glancing up at the long table to see other diplomats lining the perimeter, your father and who you've come to know as Vlad the Impaler, gracing the far end of the table. “What’s going on?” questioned towards your father even though your eyes are locked with Vlads. Your father says nothing to you as he quietly sends off the others in the room, leaving only the three of you. You only move when he quirks a finger in a come-hither gesture, your eyes glued to your socked feet as you cross your hands in front of your legs. “You understand the reason for my business here,” your father says, “to create a treaty with him” word spoken with venom, “to prevent him from causing any more destruction and massacre off to the West” Saying nothing, only giving a slight nod, still looking down. “Well everything was lined up perfectly, but now, the Voivode (governor) has added a new term to the treaty. Your hand in marriage.”

Feeling your eyes bulge out of their sockets as your head flies up, immediately shouting out “What?” the glare your father sticks on you prevents you from saying anymore. “You heard me girl.” grabbing your arm as he drags you to the farthest corner of the room. “And as much as I hate to do this, you will marry him. You’re reaching your twentieth year and still haven’t married, and I will not jeopardize the well-state of Hungary just because you decide to be stupid and prance around in the town unsupervised.” Your jaw dropping in shock, eyes welling with tears. This man before you was not your father, in all fairness he hadn’t been much of a father after your mother died but his words still hurt nonetheless. 

“Your grace, I would like a moment alone with your daughter.” your father turns red-faced, the beginnings of a protest forming in his mind, “It wasn’t a suggestion.” One elegant finger pointing towards the door, “Leave. Now.” huffing, your father pushes past you and storms towards the door, the loud sound of it banging closed behind you causes you to jump, a small cry of fear leaving your lips. 

Now it was just you and him. With your head still down you didn’t notice his approach until perfectly polished shoes fell just within your line of sight. Your name being gently called as a rough hand softly finds itself upon the back of your elbow. “I hope you’ve learned by now that I mean you no harm.” His right hand coming to your chin and tipping your head up, Blue eyes coming into contact with yours once again. “I hope you know I do not wish to cause you distress with my proposal.” You nod profusely, muttering out a soft repeating of “I know.” The same hand on your chin moves up to wipe the tears you didn’t know had fallen. For a man who had killed thousands with those same hands, when he was near it was nothing but gentle touches. “Our marriage doesn’t have to be immediate, I’m not immune to the benefits of a little light courtship, however I am reaching an age no bachelor ever should.” Words spoken with a joking lilt, Vlad briefly hunching over. You can’t help but chuckle at the sight of his horrible interpretation of an old person. 

The two of you are launched into a comfortable silence, and you realize that with all that you’ve learned about this man in the past however many hours didn’t scare you as much as it probably should’ve. And with this newfound bravery and lack of fear, you confidently reach and grab the hand that’s resting on your cheek and with as much courage as you could muster, and you accept his proposal. 

‘Being with him wasn’t at all what I thought it would be. He was nothing but kind to me, nothing but gentle touches and words all throughout our marriage.’

With the treaty being settled and your newfound courtship with a certain military general, everyone left back to their home territories, including your father. Him practically trading you off to sell his own skin didn’t hurt as much as it used too. He left quickly and with promise that most of your possessions still in Hungary would be sent down to Romania. You kept Agnes with you, after all she’d been one of your closest confidants since your mother had died. When the spring of 1460 came along, it brought your twentieth birthday and marriage ceremony with it. 

It was a truly gorgeous ceremony. While not filled with pomp and circumstance, it was graceful, elegant. Your pursuer wasn’t exactly poorer, and you were able to have the most gorgeous gown you’d thought you’d ever seen. You had Agnes of all people walk you down the aisle, seeing as your father hadn’t thought to show even though invitations had been sent weeks in advance. You had been introduced to an estranged number of people at your wedding. Your husbands’ father, Valerious, who served a group of Holy Knights. He proved to be a rather cynical man, yet seemed to be nice once you’d gotten to know him. 

You couldn’t help but notice, however, a man who always hovered near the back. He was tall, dark hair, covered in black clothing, however you could never make out his face. You knew he was watching you, even when separated from Vlad you could feel the glare of someone constantly burning into the back of your neck. Everytime you garnered your husband's attention to question him about the man, he seemed to have disappeared, swallowed by the shadows he hid in. 

Marriage to one of the most dangerous men on this side of the Balkans wasn’t bad. He always treated you with a gentle hand, was never harsh, never cruel, and he never-ever raised his voice. When questioned on his docile behavior his reasoning behind it being that you were his wife, and you should never need to fear him. 

When you came to find out that he didn’t live in the palace-like house you were staying in when you first arrived in Romania you were slightly shocked. No, instead he lived in a citadel, a castle near the Arges River; Poenari. And what a beautiful place it was. You much preferred the secludism of this house than the one in the town. The view of the mountains and the fresh air they produced was always a reprieve. Your room was in the highest level of one of the castle spires, with a large window parallel to your bed, so you always woke to the stunning view of the sunrise. 

You were however surprisingly lonely most of the time. As it would turn out, being someone of extreme military prowess took a lot of your husband's time away from you. If it weren’t for Agnes and the few estranged workers who milled around the estate you fear you’d have gone mad. When he wasn’t busy trying to take over most of Europe, he was a very caring man. Giving you luxurious gifts, taking you on trips. His love took you into the deepest throes of passion, both physically and metaphorically. 

You truly couldn’t ask for a better husband.

‘It was raining that night, not quite cold enough for it to snow. I can’t remember that much, I just remember how scared I was.’

The rain crashed against your window, thunder and lightning taking the sky ever-so-often, Vlad wasn’t in bed even though it was quite late. He was having a very crucial meeting, about what you didn’t know, he’d only come to your room to tell you not to wait on him, to go on and sleep, and to bestow a small kiss to you and your rotund stomach. 

After almost two years of marriage, the summer of 1462 blessed you with news of a child. With Poenari being so far from any doctors, your dear Agnes stepped in as a midwife of sorts, making sure you were healthy; sleeping and eating well. She said that springtime would be when your child would finally make their appearance into the world, and you were eaten alive with both anticipation and excitement. 

But with your pregnancy came all sorts of changes. For example, it might have been the dead of winter, but you felt as if you were burning alive. Dressed in nothing but one of your husband's shirts and your undergarments you couldn’t find it in yourself to combat the heat. Grabbing the side of the mattress and your bedside-table, you heave yourself off the bed, reaching for your thin silk robe.

You failed to notice the dark figure in the corner of your room. 

Shuffling over to the other side of the room you go to feel around the box of matches off one of the bookshelves, to relight the lamp on your side-table. Once you find what you’re looking for, you turn on your heel right as lightning strikes and lights up the room. It was for only a moment, but that split-second of light was all you needed to see the man standing in the corner of the room closest to your door. You almost think it’s your husband playing a trick on you, but the rational part of your brain understands that Vlad would never do that to you, especially in your current condition. With the man so close to the door you surely can’t run, so you do the only other thing you could think of.

Scream and hope your husband or a guard hears you in time.

You didn’t even register how loud your scream was, your body going into fight or flight mode the second the man lunges forwards. You bolt as quickly as you could to your Husbands’ side of the bed to grab a dagger he keeps next to him off his side-table. You turn to stab your assailant as he reaches to grab you. He clutches your wrist faster than you could keep up with, pushing it back and trying to twist your own wrist towards you. Crying out as it reaches an angle it shouldn’t, you propel your knee forward into his groin which gives you enough time to run around the other side of the bed and towards the door, reveling in his groan of pain.

As you work your way past the bed you feel the air around the back of your head shift and the next sound you hear is that of your window breaking. Ignoring the glass that flies all over the room, you crank open your bedroom door, screaming at the top of your lungs for help as you try to begin to make your way down the spiral staircase. It’s only when you hear voices shouting from below do you feel a hand wrap its way around the back of your neck, yanking you back up the stairs. You’re dragged through your room and brought to where your window once was, glass shards digging into your feet. Lightning strikes once more as you’re flipped around, back leaning out into the rainy abyss, and you’re able to get a better glimpse of your attacker.

It’s the man from your wedding. 

Right as you reach this epiphany the door to your room slams open, your husband entering. He calls your name, hand lifting in the air and weakly falling back. “Don’t do this Gabriel,” he pleads, “Please let go of my wife.” The mystery man, Gabriel, pushes you further, your back bending at an awkward angle out and into the chilling rain. “I’m sorry,” your assailant murmurs, “But you broke the oath.” 

And with that, he pushes you out the window. 

You can’t tell if that sound is you screaming or if it’s the wind rushing past your head. Your hair whips around your face as rain projectiles onto you like tiny bullets. The last thing you see is your Husband leaning out the window, gazing at you in defeated sorrow, and a gloved hand coming around, plunging a dagger into his chest. 

You’re not quite sure how you die. Whether your body slammed onto the hard ground hundreds of feet below your bedroom, or if you land in the Arges. All you remember is that brief bit of searing pain,

And then everything went dark. 

~

Originally posted December 2nd, 2021.

[mins-fins]

shining star !

"shining star come into view.."

synopsis: life, in all of it's forms, is beautiful. life created is beautiful, life unknown is beautiful, the calloused hands which carve out the structures of life are beautiful. just don't form an attachment, it'll be harder in the long run.

pairing: nct dream 00z x male!reader

genre: science fiction, near future au, robots and androids, love rectangle??, vaguely space au, fluff, angst, romance but also no one gets the guy at the end, 00z centric pov, sorry no reader pov 😣, relationship studies, ambiguous/open ending, loose frankenstein references, featuring guest star android park jisung

warnings: swearing, space talk, robot talk, fighting, an ending that seems sad, mean sexy boss doyoung, the ethics of getting dangerously emotionally attached to your own invention, sooo much star talk, beware android jisung

word count: 16.2k

notes: me after not posting for ten days straight then just coming out with this 😇 anyway!! experimental ass work wouldve done numbers on ao3 (kidding..), feel like for a work with four love interests the romance seems pretty lacking 😭😭 i missed jeno.. and haechan and jaemin and renjun and im experiencing a wave of sadness bc nct dream were in my city and i didnt even get to see them 😣 also ANDROID JISUNG!! i like writing new things, and this was a challenge because unlike most of my other long works i started writing this before i had the full picture in mind, also i wrote all of this in the span of nine days so um, im not posting anytime soon again 😞 my apologies for fluctuating with my consistency.. also the ending is open!! so you can imagine any outcome you want, good or bad, enough of my rambling now, just enjoy my mess!!

I.                     “ beware: for i am fearless, and therefore powerful “.

the effervescent expanse of space is an enigma, a mystery humans often poke and prod at to draw needless conclusions from. being stranded in a galaxy on a floating rock yet having little to no idea of what the unknown holds is enough to capture fear, being completely oblivious to the true nature of the universe you’re stuck in the middle of is enough to arise panic.

astronauts are brave, yes, but space is much too vast for humans, much too vast for them to survive a day outside of their oxygen filled utopia. rovers usually are feasible, but they’re now outdated, hunks of metal that more than often break down, and if the familiar knitting of doyoung’s eyebrows is any indication, it all frustrates him to an extreme extent.

still, it doesn’t explain why they suddenly have a titular new member joining their team.

jeno has become accustomed to all the nooks and crannies of the laboratory. the hallway splits into two turns reminiscent of a fork in the road, and it’s always the right turn that leads him to his destination, the left turn would put him straight in the arms of donghyuck, who isn’t exactly having the best time reacting to such news, so he’s making sure to keep a safe distance.

maybe catching a glimpse of your face will aid in the erasure of donghyuck’s distinct glare burned into jeno’s mind.

“y/n?”

it’s the usual: a mess. the mechanics of it all is your favorite part. science is beautiful, yes, but your one true love seems to always be robotics. the art of creation using that of metal is.. strange, some would say it’s off putting, nerdy, many more synonyms that would usually make jeno roll his eyes. the barrage of scattered aluminum and steels is as mundane to his eyes as it is mundane to the touch of your fingertips.

but you aren’t exactly visible from the first step into the room.

there’s a muffled sound of reply, a hum? groan? something that jeno can’t decipher with the heaping piles of bioplastics making their home on the ground.

he’s cut off from the second calling of your name when you rise from a pile of metals tucked in the corner, under the window and just barely evading the light attempting to seep through the curtains. you offer him your usual smile, snickering as you remove the clear glasses perched atop your nose and place them on your head. “jeno! do you need something?”

jeno can barely help the upturn of his lips, his hands unconsciously coming to clasp together. “i’m assuming doyoung told you.. right?”

you blink, displayed obliviousness betraying the clear insight behind your eyes. you run your sweaty palms over your pants, the id pinned to your chest seemingly crumpled from your former activities on the floor. “about the new addition to the team?”

his nod is paired with silence.

“and about this new.. project?”

you hum at the sight of his second nod, tucking a strand behind your ear as you then begin whistling into the air. jeno busies himself by zeroing in on the many blueprints you leave rolled open on the nearby tables, robots, robot parts, androids, the usual..

jeno’s eyes flit over to you again, a small kick to all the elastomers littering the floor, he hopes you have no objection to that one. “guess i can see where he’s coming from” your hands place themselves onto your hips, the sound of you kissing your teeth meeting jeno’s ears. “gives me more time for this new prototype though” the sense of your euphoria in your smile can’t seem to be replicated elsewhere, jeno sees your passion for all of this as meritorious, a true sign to how you’ll never change.

“and the new.. member?”

your eyebrows raise, using an eye roll as your response. “well you don’t seem too keen”.

you possess the striking ability to read lee jeno like an open book. you begin rolling up the many blueprints as a silent way of organization, your reverberating hum being the tune of ‘shining star’ by earth wind and fire. jeno scratches behind his ear, a frown tugging at his lips. “guess i just don’t understand what we need someone new for”.

“they just assume i need someone else attached to robotics to make it all go smoother”.

oh, jeno didn’t expect for you to know that one.

“this has always been a staple of our team, it was just you and me for a year, then hyuck joined, then two years later injunie joined us, it’s around that time where someone else is being added simply for the sake of moving us along”.

“it’s been almost three years, do we really need an asset when you already do such great a job yourself?”

you suck your teeth, snapping your fingers in his direction as jeno obeys your silent order by handing over yet another blueprint, it’s the only one with a finished sketch, but jeno can’t make out the drawn out parts for long, as you roll it up and place it with your other ones. “ask doyoung, he clearly has an answer for that one”.

the room isn’t exactly dimly lit, but the lack of light permeating through the satin curtains don’t do your side profile justice. jeno’s eyes drift their naturally, you again sigh as your head leans downward, irises dilating at the sight of your very own work. “did he tell you whose joining?” your tongue prods at the side of your cheek, fist knocking on the wood of the table before you.

“an engineer formerly assigned to siberies”.

a furrowing of eyebrows. “that far? why would there need to be such a drastic move?”

“doyoung does what doyoung does”.

your tooth sinks into your bottom lip, just barely drawing blood, but then, a smile, your usual, soft smile. “anyway, you know how i feel about additions, as long as they care, i don’t mind”.

“you’re too good with people”.

your responding laughter is laced with elation.

with your arms folded over your chest, jeno takes yet another few minutes to observe the room you often spend hours upon hours stuck in. the cognizant urge to zero in on that old picture of you two is always high, you uttered to jeno that you keep it in your room as an ‘encouraging reminder’, him being one of your first real friends and all.

there are other photos too, but jeno pays little to no regard for the stupid photographs of donghyuck which litter the shelves. the photos of you and jeno expand a wide array of your collection, but the one from before you two ended up becoming slaves to this curse of a laboratory is one he cherishes dearly.

it was always just you two before all of this.

“why do you think space?”

jeno ceases his staring, instead intrigued by your sudden inquiry. “you’ll have to specify what you mean”.

you opt to sucking your teeth, a display of your bubbling irritation. “space is so.. well, empty, it’s a void that can barely be explored planet by planet, we’ll never be able to touch the sun, never able to go ourselves for another few decades seeing the pace science is going, we can barely even get a piece of metal near our first planet, so, why exactly space?”

science is about inquiry, science is built on the basis of human curiosity and nature no one can understand, but they long to pick apart. you then tilt your head, face scrunching at your own words. “i guess.. you know— doyoung, i have something he wants, something he deems valuable, i can’t exactly understand why space is so relevant, i don’t get the purpose of pouring my life into an android for something i won’t ever experience”.

and maybe you find it amusing, your silent snickers make sure to spell that out. the question is one that’s drawn out, less of a question and more of a thought vomit, something jeno didn’t exactly expect from a conversation such as this.

jeno stares upward, and for an unknown reason, he longs to feel your fingers intertwined with his. “we’ll never really know enough, but that can be said for anything, science is about questioning the unknown, research for the benefit of those coming after us”.

“human inquiry”.

“hm”.

you seem interested, picking off a piece of cotton sticking to the side of his sweatshirt. “smart ass” you joke, a small snort leaving your lips at the blow.

and really, jeno just smiles, you’re too sweet to genuinely deliver an insult.

II.                     “ he was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance “.

the team is introduced to the new ‘asset’ (jeno loathes such a word) the following monday. a popular robotics engineer by the name of na jaemin, no one is aware of anything other than the fact that he is respected, his name rolls off the tongue well, and the pink hair is much too bright in comparison to the stillness of his expression.

the “team” simply began as a mere duo, which then became a blossoming trio, when then became a.. group. there’s only one member who doesn’t hold the anxiety permeating off of everyone else, and that is you.

fearless, that’s what you are. to the extent that six feet tall mechanical contraptions can’t even earn the hinder of a muscle. maybe being locked in a room as a way of work does that to a man, jeno will have to look into if that is a strategy for toughening up or something.

jeno immediately observes the obvious, jaemin’s hands are dry and calloused. when he reaches for handshakes, donghyuck is the only one who doesn’t make a move, something of a cower in his expression. it’s a bit of a surprise, bright, loud mouthed, brash donghyuck, cowering? jeno finds such a prospect astonishing.

jaemin’s grin is somewhat scary for a first time interaction, his teeth bare in a motion that’s simply.. performed. “it’s nice to meet you, all of you, i’ve heard good things about this.. team”.

you don’t reply with a smile, but there’s satisfaction behind your eyes. “you were not who i was expecting”.

“same here” renjun speaks jeno’s thoughts out into the world, his smile strained.

jaemin’s smile is again unsavory, but jeno keeps his composure so as to not let such a comment slip. for a reason unknown, you show a smile. “well then, let’s work hard together to make sure we succeed”.

donghyuck now physically cowers behind jeno, a grimace perfectly placed on his features as he readies up a sneer. “i don’t like this guy” he says, as if jaemin isn’t standing less than a foot away from him.

“i can hear you” jaemin’s smile twitches, not yet fully faltering.

“good” donghyuck replies, his arm coming to link with your own. he raises a suspicious eyebrow his way, keeping himself close by, as if you’d square up if jaemin decided to make any sort of threat towards him.

you reach behind yourself to squeeze donghyuck’s hand, clear serenity in your expression. “be nice” you whisper. “we’ll be seeing more of each other from now on either way”.

donghyuck grimaces, eyeing jaemin with distrust he isn’t keen on taking back. “hopefully not..” he mutters, eyes casting to the right.

jaemin simply shares another formidable smile.

both you and jaemin are assigned to the northernmost lab, sniō. a cold, isolated world that’s nothing reminiscent of the warmth your regular office holds, jeno’s face twitches at the name alone, how one could even survive in such an atmosphere is beyond him.

you always do the robot stuff, and since jaemin is in the same field, it means the time spent between you two shall grow, just until you create a working prototype.

na jaemin seems to be just as intrigued by you as everyone is when they first meet you, jeno guesses having to work with someone in a below freezing room brings two close.

“i apologize for donghyuck’s.. attitude, he takes a while to warm up to”.

“seems he doesn’t want to warm up at all”.

your eyes remain trained on the screen, jaemin takes note of how your irises seem to void out, nothing but pure, untouched engrossment present in the darkness. you then put on the pair of glasses typically kept at your side, cracking your knuckles. “don’t worry, he’s not that bad”.

“but he’s still somewhat bad?”

jaemin is somewhat drawn to it, you in particular. this is about a partnership after all, meaning you two have to sink into the feeling of knowing each other. the flurry of robot parts earn a grunt, hands now placing themselves onto his hips. “not that bad, he can just have.. an attitude problem”.

the other offers a chuckle in response to your words, an empty blueprint being rolled open onto the metal table. jaemin cops a glance, lips doing an upturn at the focus in your expression. “let’s get this done, yeah?”

a hum is all you’re offered, but it’s not that jaemin doesn’t care, it’s just that he doesn’t want to laser focus on that pretty smile of yours.

III.                     “ what can stop the determined heart and resolved will of man? “.

when you get deep into work, you slip into a certain state of mind. maybe one day you’ll be responsible for androids overthrowing the human race and taking over the world, donghyuck thinks you probably foresee such an outcome with how much you put into pieces of metals.

lee donghyuck first met you in the same manner as jeno, in the crossroads of the laboratory’s mishmash of a hallway.

robot presence at an all time high, donghyuck remembers visibly jumping backward once coming into contact with you, now unable to tear his eyes away from the sight. he blinked, then his eyes narrowed against his will, a clear display of his judgment. “woah”.

exactly, his first words to you were ‘woah’, an exhibit of his surprise, definitely not his last one when it would come to you. he supposes that the whole unpredictability ruse is how you live your life, maybe jeno isn’t all that crazy.

you blinked in a silent reply, then, you laughed into your usual pretty smile as a third hand rose from behind your back. “hello to you too”.

“another hand?”

the intrigue was genuine, a simple judgment still there, but the inquiries were outweighing it all, as he tilted his head as his reply to your own. your nod was, in the strangest way possible, comforting. “i need extra assistance”.

donghyuck immediately knew the next question; “you created it yourself?”

“yep, have control of it and everything”.

he couldn’t even let a snarky lie slip in the moment. “that’s very impressive, do you usually..?”

you sensed his upcoming query, because you again giggled. “yeah, robotics is my passion”.

donghyuck hummed, somehow, the smile you brought was without irritation. “y/n”.

“donghyuck, it’s nice to meet you”.

and really, it was.

doyoung is no longer the monster donghyuck thought he was way back when he was an intern, as he gets older, the other seems to have glares that soften. his scientific curiosity exceeded the earlier fear, though, because he’s been able to stay here for years even with the older looking as if he wants to wrap a hand around his neck and squeeze.

the first time donghyuck meets both you and jeno, he immediately observes the other’s puppy like features. he found your relationship odd, considering you didn’t have to do anything magnificent yet lee jeno would stare with an enraptured gaze as if the individual moles on your face themselves solved world hunger and cured disease.

ah, so you two have that kind of relationship.

(“don’t you think jeno looks like a samoyed?” he recalls uttering to you a week later, there was a gleam in your eye, and it was completely dedicated to the blueprints you had probably gazed upon millions of times before that moment.

your laughter came in a harmonious rhythm, and the sound was so pleasant that donghyuck stared plainly captivated for a mere moment. “at an angle, he kind of does look like a puppy” your hand came to cover your mouth, despite donghyuck being the only person in your company.

donghyuck found a frown tugging at his lips, what are you hiding? don’t you know your laughter is pretty? he opted out of saying that out loud, anxious over something unknown. “sometimes he even acts like one”.

you clicked your tongue, playing with the collar of your shirt. “he’s simply clingy” you replied, straightening your posture as you silently ask for a pen with the motioning of your fingers. when donghyuck hands it over, he relishes in the small moment that your fingers meet, the delicacy of your hands is a feeling he can’t ever shake off.

or maybe lee jeno is simply in love, isn’t that strange y/n?)

donghyuck eventually got acclimated to the aberration of the usual laboratory day. doyoung asks a lot of you, courtesy of your vast knowledge concerning everything robots. you seem to enjoy the proposition of working yourself to the ground, it’s as if you’re trying to meet a goal, see how long you can work before you completely pass out or get choked to death by one of your robot contraptions.

“you’ll die if you keep going like this”.

your response was a scrunch of your facial muscles, an action that made donghyuck assume you’d reply with some snappy rebuttal, that’s what he always does after all. “death can’t catch up to me just yet, i won’t allow for it to”.

“not sure it’ll be glad with that proposal..” donghyuck muttered, but you simply let your eyes avert upward, distinguishing the planet models cascaded on the ceiling. it’s a staple of the laboratory’s main room, a duplicate of our very own solar system, fit with the sun, and the eight titular planets we have become accustomed to (though donghyuck knows you don’t exactly agree with the prospect of pluto being demoted, “poor guy, he probably feels left out..”; that’s what you muttered about it, he finds it funny).

“when the time is right, i’ll have control over how i want to go”.

“we’ll you can’t exactly determine the wavelength of destiny” donghyuck responded, and you snickered, hand again coming up to hide your mouth.

“don’t worry, something so stupid won’t be what takes me out, i promise you”.

you promised him, you promised him.

for a fourth interaction, donghyuck simply found you so.. beautiful. beautiful in a manner reminiscent of the many galaxies which hold worlds in them, tied with the stars, planets, comets, asteroids, all the celestial bodies donghyuck has dedicated so much of his life to studying.

the promise was signed by your pretty smile, signed by the shooting stars present in the night sky.

it’ll be kept, after all, you aren’t one to break them, donghyuck knows that well enough.

IV.                     “ the world was to me a secret which i desired to devine “.

na jaemin isn’t exactly used to such a work ethic reminiscent of his own.

he works better alone, he usually always works alone. he originally got a part in this project because he thought he was the only engineer on this prototype duty, the only one specializing in actually creating this android, but then you came into the picture, and..

it’s safe to say that he’s steadily impressed.

the prototype has nothing of a face, it’s simply a standing piece of metals that don’t exactly allow for it to scrunch it’s face in the manner of a human being just yet. there’s ink painted on jaemin’s shirt, just shy of his usually prim and clear id, but that isn’t his main focus currently.

it— he opens his eyes for the first time, the eyelids fluttering open in the fashion replicating that of someone waking up in the morning. it stands rock still, the arms haven’t been programmed well enough yet.

your gaze burns through the pre-android, arms folded over your chest as you still in a method implicative of the robotic body before you. it’s pupils dilate, the irises completely black, not the familiar dark brown color of your eyes, simply pitch black. the sclera is a pure, blank white that is nothing of a human’s, jaemin would know.

he glances at his side, your eyes dark and the circles under them even darker. he opens his mouth to speak out a query, but then the android starts;

his pupils dilate, widening to the extent only a human’s pupil can, so lively so early in the process. again, the movements are unnatural, arms remaining pinned at his sides.

his mouth doesn’t curve upward, his eyes convey all there is to convey. good morning, it speaks, voice devoid of anything.. sensation, the only hint of one being behind the pupils which remained wide. i love you.

then, there’s nothing more else to say, and the pre-done android winds up, shoulders slumping as it shuts back down, eyelids fluttering shut, pupils narrowing, all of the color draining from where they previously remained.

jaemin blinks, observing you pinch the bridge of your nose, your teeth kissing one another. “i keep forgetting we programmed that one”.

“think he just does it as a natural instinct now” your arms drop at your sides, glasses being swept off your face and placed onto the nearby table. it is 11:38 pm, not morning, but he doesn’t seem to care.

“he? so it’s a boy?”

you inquire as if you’re attending a gender reveal, something of an amusing look behind your own pupils. “first name idea i got was for a boy.. do you want a change?”

your hum isn’t intelligible enough for jaemin to decipher your inner most thoughts. “no, it’s cute”.

“what?”

“your dedication to this project”.

in a manner that is completely unlike him, a tint of red spreads across jaemin’s cheeks, heat coiling over his face. you didn’t call him cute, why did that even fluster him? he opts to glancing away, he wouldn’t be able to take his eyes off you if he again decided to stare.

“is that it for tonight?”

“i want to add on a few tweaks” you reply, you don’t mention anything pertaining to sleep.

“not even a couple of hours?” 

you simply manage a fleeting glance, a tired smile present on your features. his hair is mussed, tousled from the little care he paid to it throughout the day, you reach over and twirl a strand between your fingers, a ministration that brings a specific feeling of solace which comes as a small surprise.

“there’s no need to worry about me, you go get sleep”.

there’s the urge to rebel, to argue until his throat itches and it all hurts, but he keeps it all inside, mouth falling closed with a silent plop. “tomorrow same time?”

you hum in agreement.

jaemin’s face twitches, the freezing atmosphere of sniō now becoming more of a bother than before. your index finger again graces a hair strand, and his eyes flutter closed in a moment of relaxation.

he then chuckles at a sudden thought, glancing upward. “what do you think about the name mouth suction gangster?”

your laughter is irresistible, amusement high in the air despite the late night. “i think we’ll lose our federal funding if you name him such a thing”.

jaemin presents an exaggerated pout, and you ruffle his pink locks. “do you have any name ideas?”

you lean closer, jaemin instinctively leaning backward as you continue to seem bewitched by his pink hair. “it’s a secret”.

jaemin takes the opportunity to admire your features, each of your individual moles could be one of their own galaxies, holding a barrage of stars which simply amplify your beauty. “i’ll find out”.

“sure, good night jaemin”.

jaemin isn’t sure why, but he hopes to see that smile around more. it’s simply.. well, the words won’t come to mind just yet.

“good night y/n”.

when he finds out what the word is, it’ll surely become one of his favorites.

V.                     “ there is something at work in my soul, which i do not understand “.

renjun’s name has a flurry of meanings despite it being a mere six letters, it’s a simple combination of two parts, yet those two parts hold the staple of how he managed things through his eyes for the latter part of his life.

the part “仁” usually means “benevolence”, it’s the meaning most people associate with the first three letters. the other two meanings are “ideal” and “expressing respect”, the adjective being “sensitive”. his parents reiterated to him many times that they had several arguments about the choosing, because naming your child whose future you can’t foresee the word kind is genuinely hilarious, but renjun would ensure that he’d grow up to be the kindest son they could ever have.

the second half “俊” is the typical name which means “handsome; pretty” or “of outstanding talent”, the adjectives being “smart, eminent”, a laughable prospect really, renjun has always been said to get his looks from his mother, he inherited her soft features whilst he got the strong personality (and by proxy, voice) from his father.

he assumes his smarts must be a mix, renjun never thought science, really, he originally wanted to go to school for music, but as his mother said; “music doesn’t pay the bills”.

he was never meant to end up here, not on his own accord anyway, and he was never supposed to be a part of this team in the first place.

but here he is.

don’t name it, he recalls doyoung saying, a booming voice being his go to. it’s only going to survive out in space for a couple of months, naming it will simply make it all harder in the long run.

but of course, you’ve never been one to listen.

to love something is to give it a name, you’ve always had attachments to your projects. heck, most of your caffeine addiction can be attributed to that talking coffee machine you created way back.

it makes enough sense to renjun why both you and jaemin gave the android a name, it’s usual to name a creation of yours, especially if there’s a specific meaning in mind.

renjun’s not a fan of robots, especially not of androids. despite all your fondness, he just can’t get it, and he knows he won’t ever get it, they simply freak him out. androids are too lifelike, androids are so freaky, he just can’t find an ounce of humanity in them that so called creators could find so easily.

the prototype isn’t yet finished, but it already has a couple defining facial features. it has small eyes, tiny heart shaped lips, a splitting smile, and it seems to have a knack for saying “i love you”.. like all the time.

and doyoung specifically said to not name it. naming it means attachment, attachment that’ll interfere with the way doyoung longs for this mission to go.

we can’t have another failure, you know what’ll happen to y/n if this goes wrong.

renjun isn’t quite as taken to this as the others seem to be..

“you gonna give it a name?”

renjun observes as you only let one eye open, arms acting as your makeshift pillow as you allow for your legs to stretch across the couch. you ponder for a moment, renjun senses that you’re contemplating on if you should lie or not, something about information between robotics engineers staying between them.

(and he loathes it, why are you keeping secrets with jaemin?)

“him, and yes, jaemin is very keen on doing so”.

“okay, so what do you have in mind?”

“are you gonna tell donghyuck?”

the question seems a tiny bit accusatory, renjun would feel offended if not for there being some truth behind those words. you know too much for your own good, he’s secretly afraid you’re some crazy mind reading alien, or a time traveler, or you’re just constantly eavesdropping.

he glances away, staring endlessly at the twinkling stars in the night sky. he hasn’t been stargazing in a while, it was a little tradition you two developed after your first dinner together, back when renjun was the newbie who had the least scientific experience. he guesses nerdy constellation knowledge made for a good past time.

(“you have a favorite?” renjun recalls you asking him. it was a spontaneous exchange, going up to the rooftop when you weren’t allowed to gave renjun the full picture of how exactly you were. your smile remains as pretty as it was when renjun first met you in the cold interior of doyoung’s claustrophobic office.

“aquila” he still has the taste of the word on his tongue. “it contains some of my favorite stars, altair, theta aquilae, lambda aquilae.. most of them”.

your intrigue seemed to be contagious, and though the light was minuscule, he could still make out your prettiest features under the dimly shining stars. the light of the shooting stars reflected in the shine of your pupils, a shine that simply seemed so.. perfect. “do you have a favorite?” renjun asked back, hands placed in his lap as he fruitfully avoided your eyes.

you feigned thought, renjun already knows you usually always have the answer on standby. “sagittarius, it consists of the two triple stars, you know i always see pi sagittarius on nights like this..”

of course, pi sagittarius is visible to the naked eye, renjun barely had to squint to capture a glimpse that night. and you? you simply looked enchanted, bewitched, something else that again seemed contagious, as renjun couldn’t help but use the moment to gaze at you with such captivation. you’re captivating, without having even to do anything special, simply talking about the stars is enough.

you scooted closer, knees knocking and shoulders brushing against renjun’s. “if you were a star.. you would be gamma arietis.. it’s apart of aries, one of the brightest”.

it’s a fleeting whisper, an intimate moment that could barely even be deemed ‘intimate’. renjun assumes so, though, who just says that? who compares someone to one of the prettiest stars in the sky? the cool night air did a good job of masking his tinted cheeks, but renjun can never exactly forget it.

in his own sickening mind, huang renjun would’ve taken that as a love confession. gladly as well.)

renjun’s gaze remains fixed on the window, your eyes now again fluttering closed. “am i no longer trustworthy?”

you hum, eyes remaining closed, exhaustion slowly beginning to seep through. “you’ve earned my trust, but it can always be broken”.

renjun is aware. the only person you probably fully trust at this point is jeno, but of course, you’ve known him for the longest. “i have my pinky, i’ll swear”.

you look as if you’re about to slip, but then you suddenly flinch, rising from your spot in an abrupt jerking movement that startles renjun out of his star admiring. “i’m not done yet..”

“y/n, it’s late, are you really going back to sniō?”

“it’s last minute!”

terrible fucking excuse, renjun’s nose crinkles.

it’s less of him being angry, more of him simply wanting your company, attention, just.. something, why should it all be divided between jaemin and this android thing? his stomach curls in an ugly feat of jealousy.

his arms stay dropped at his sides, and he clears his throat. “don’t stay at the laboratory all night again!”

stupid thing to say, he already knows you will, you’ve never been one to listen.

VI.                     “ if i cannot inspire love, i will cause fear! “.

the “team” (jeno doesn’t really think of them as such) is introduced to prototype 205 on a seemingly regular thursday. fortunately for jeno, they don’t have to be in the below freezing environment of sniō, he’d probably faint from such a prospect. no, you guys meet in the space of the main laboratory, the overhead lights shining over you as if you’re an angel.

“his name is jisung” jaemin says, full of pride. your silence is key, there might be no words, but jeno can practically feel your excitement. sometimes, he feels as if your minds must be connected by some invisible wire. your fatigue is clear, jaemin probably hasn’t gotten sleep in weeks, jeno is afraid he might pass out, and you? your exhaustion is now completely usual, the bags under your eyes holding them upward as to not have them flutter shut.

“jisung” your voice is soft as you glance over at i— him, your stare nothing short of proud. “say hi to renjun, jeno, and donghyuck”.

jisung, half hidden behind jaemin’s shoulder, looks up at jaemin, as if for encouragement. it’s cute. jeno has to remind himself that the mannerisms are simply coded into his system. jaemin nods at him, and jisung finally shows out a part of his face, not yet stepping out.

“hi renjun” his eyelids flutter a little too humanely. “hello jeno, donghyuck” his voice is soft, yet it’s deep, clearly deeper than jeno’s, scratch that, probably deeper than everyone’s.

“..i look forward to working with you” donghyuck replies cautiously.

jaemin’s eyes shine as jisung parrots such enthusiasm, your shoulders slumping forward in action of relief. jeno’s eyes form into crescents as he smiles, just watching you be proud of your own work pleases him. despite your unkempt, mad scientist appearance, no one would ever be able to guess you had been awake for about thirty two hours simply trying to get jisung to turn on. the fondness in your expression is more befitting of a proud parent than an inventor.

you’re going to break your own heart at this point, jeno knows it, and judging by renjun’s narrowed eyes, he knows it too.

donghyuck chokes on nothing in the air, a clutch to his chest amplifying the dramatics of it all. “oh my god, he’s so cute” he can barely contain his laughter, pure excitement behind his eyes. “you made him cute”.

“of course i did” jaemin replies, sounding a tad bit offended. “he’s the cutest, all courtesy of y/n’s expertise”.

jeno can’t help the unconscious softening of his gaze as jisung copies your smile. his feigned irritation is barely even sustained, it’s difficult to keep a straight face when he is so adorable.

renjun simply grumbles something he takes as a silent rebuttal, it’ll probably take a while for him to get used to jisung. jeno blinks at jisung, who again smiles as he practically senses jeno’s eyes. “it’s nice to meet you, jisung”.

the name rolls off the tongue rather well.

“why jisung?”

jeno knows you, and by ‘knows’, he means spent full hours with you hiding in storage closets from the mean older kids when they’d trash your inventions, back before all of this, back when jeno was the only one you had to lean on. he hasn’t gotten the full scope when it comes to the full extent of your mind, but you two have history.

and what jeno knows, is that you don’t choose names unless there’s a specific meaning in mind. you like names, you think they’re “simply the prettiest kind of random, meanings can go a long way..”

you blink your eyes up at the ceiling, and somehow, even with the insane lethargy, they don’t close against your own will, you simply keep them open. you motion your hand, beckoning for jeno to give you his.

his hand places into yours in a natural sense of action, and of course, even with the roughness of the metals you spend hours around, your hands remain soft, soothing. jeno wonders if touching a cloud could compare to the pure delicacy of your palm, your fingertips. you give a glance upward, the curves of your eyes mirroring your very own smile.

“jisung means.. devotion” you whisper, slowly tracing the spelling of his name into jeno’s palm. “it can also ironically mean alive, jaemin thought of that one..”

“devotion to who?”

when your eyes flit upward, jeno wonders if that was the wrong question to ask. there’s nothing foreseeable behind your eyes, or maybe there is and it’s successfully overshadowed by your clear lack of sleep. he almost jumps backward, but then you smile again, your eyes forming into crescents as you begin a silent fit of laughter. “everyone really, loyalty, it’s one of his biggest traits”.

you know if this continues your simply going to hurt yourself in the end.

jeno refrains from letting such a thought escape him. “he really is cute”.

jeno leans closer, whispering the words as if they’re some sort of secret, as if doyoung could be around the corner with his watchful eye on you two, as if this is an old sleepover you two are having where you giggle about what the future may bring, fingers intertwined and all. “i know, it’s a very important asset”.

not important to the mission.

again, jeno doesn’t speak such thoughts, you’re so happy, you’re so proud.

he knows better than to ruin such a beautiful thing.

VII.                     “ i ought to be thy adam, but i am rather the fallen angel… “.

doyoung wanted to get rid of you before project apollo and the success of prototype 205.

donghyuck didn’t have to hear it from renjun, he heard it in the way doyoung let each individual word fall from his lips. it’s often deemed a little ‘crazy’ that he hyper fixates on things that don’t seem to matter, but when it comes to you, donghyuck thinks it always matters.

it was a cruel move, to slyly hint it to the three and leave you out of the loop, donghyuck is all for a little cruelty sometimes, but it’s just tip toeing the line of evil. how could he even think of doing something without telling you first?

na jaemin was brought in as a replacement, the choice to keep you was only agreed upon after your teammates’ insistence. project athena went up in flames, which is what caused the distrust, but they pleaded your case either way.

(“don’t you think this is a little too drastic?” worry colored renjun’s usually stoic expression, if donghyuck focused enough, he could hear an upcoming tremble in his voice. “think of what y/n’s done for you already!”

it was two days before the arrival of the new engineer that it happened. in a manner of rarity, you were out that saturday, something only possible because of dejun’s surprisingly intimidating request. you mused that simply one day of rest would be fine, a good move on dejun’s part.

doyoung’s raised eyebrow was a threat that made even renjun tense. “shall i remind you of the mess which was project athena?”

“you can’t let him go over one failure, he’s like.. the only person who actually knows anything about robots!” yes, it got to the point where donghyuck was flailing his arms back and forth in the air. “and besides, we don’t know the other guy like that..”

“this project isn’t designed for your comfortability” god screw doyoung and his paper stacking. his hair is too neat, his eyes are too empty, his facial expressions much too stoic. maybe donghyuck’s childish fear back from his intern days is gone, but there still seems to be another kind of fear left over. “y/n’s become a liability, we’ve taken too many risks”.

jeno and donghyuck got offended on your behalf. jeno’s facial muscles twitched, a clear frown tugging at his lips as he sucked his teeth at the words from doyoung. donghyuck’s hands clenched the material of his pants, a gasp of disbelief leaving his lips. they exchanged a glance of vexation, an irritated snort leaves donghyuck. he had to be kidding.

“just.. this last mission, come on, it’ll go well”.

yes, it was renjun’s words that got a twitch out of doyoung. the older’s eyes examined each of them, renjun, then jeno, then donghyuck. then, he sighed, rolling his eyes. “you three are like children, this is his last chance, if y/n fails, you aren’t coming back here with your bag of excuses..”

donghyuck tutted, crossing his arms in an act of clear defiance. jeno looked the least irritated out of the three, but donghyuck knows it’s only because he was thinking more of you than of doyoung. renjun scowled, stomping his feet and storming out of the room.

“see? like a child”.

donghyuck probably would’ve jumped at him if not for jeno’s hand gracing his shoulder, rubbing his thumb over the blades in a comforting manner. jeno’s anger had quelled by that point, and he allowed himself to relax as best as he could. “thank you doyoung”.

donghyuck didn’t thank him for anything, there wasn’t shit to thank him for.)

the conference doesn’t need many speakers, so someone is clearly going to be left behind. donghyuck knows he’s going, he’s already prepared speeches, presentation note cards, and post it note reminders. to his very own dismay, jaemin has to tag along, and though it was an obvious foreshadowing, he still hates it.

your attendance is obvious, you’re probably much more prepared than donghyuck is, there’s never an event you don’t pre-prepare for, you always say that it’s “just in case”. that leaves it to renjun and jeno, one of them has to stay behind with jisung.

“think jeno should come with..” jaemin utters, your shuffling of papers fills the room, no sound comes from you, no indication of your agreement or disagreement. “don’t you have the coding expertise? we could use that”.

renjun begins picking at his nails, clearly anxious about being left alone with jisung. donghyuck raises an eyebrow at jaemin, lips turning downward. “are you the one calling the shots now?”

“it’s a suggestion, donghyuck, don’t get so uptight”.

donghyuck again scowls, face twisting into a grimace that’s less of disgust and more of indignation. “not uptight..”

“sure you aren’t” jaemin comments loudly, smacking a folder against the table as he wipes the dust from his hands. he glares, and donghyuck decides to glare back, one snap away from completely flipping him off.

you suck your teeth. “stop fighting, i’ll put your seats together if you don’t” your tone of voice indicates that you’re probably going to do it anyway. you pat donghyuck’s shoulder and make your way over to renjun. “are you fine staying with jisung or..?”

you’re much too generous, you are quite literally giving him an option. donghyuck observes renjun tense up momentarily, but if you notice it, you keep silent, patiently awaiting his response. he contemplates for a moment, and donghyuck gives a silent laugh at his clear anxiety. “i..” he looks over at jeno, then he shakes his head. “it’s alright, i can stay with jisung”.

“you sure?”

jeno clears his throat, the decision is done with, he doesn’t want more time for contemplation. “yeah, yeah! it’s alright!”

it’s not. donghyuck can see the way jaemin’s eyebrows furrow peripherally, and he simply clicks his tongue.

your suspicious gaze bores through his skull, but then you sigh, arms dropping at your sides. “okay, that’s good..”

donghyuck glances away, easily avoiding jaemin’s eyes. everyone is so obvious, he questions how renjun even functions around you if he answers your simple questions like that.

maybe he’s giving himself too much credit..

later that night, donghyuck joins you on the couch, your eyes stuck on the window which showcases the darkness of the night. it might be a problem, the fact that no matter how hard you try, you can no longer get a fit of sleep.

his crumpled shirt is a result of his extensive tossing and turning, how jeno ever sleeps is a mystery to him, but knowing what he does know, jeno will only ever get shut eye for a good three hours before he begins his continuous ceiling staring session. “nervous?”

you barely register his words, donghyuck is afraid you don’t hear him, afraid you might be frozen or something. it’s so weird, donghyuck always seems to find a new reason to worry his mind off concerning you, but you then blink, sucking your teeth at the window as if it did something to you personally. “kinda..” you opt to say.

donghyuck scoots closer, the two of you naturally falling together with you both deciding to lean. your eyes close for a second before opening again, as if you fear sleeping. how strange. donghyuck’s head presses against yours, your fingers coming to intertwine in a gentle manner. “do you like jisung?”

the query is whispered, and donghyuck licks his lips, really having to think it over. “he’s adorable”.

“yes or no?”

your insistence draws a tired chuckle. “yeah, i love the little shit”.

you snort, biting into your cheek. “don’t call him that”.

a hum is the response you receive.

VIII.                     “ thus strangely are our souls constructed, and by slight ligaments are we bound to prosperity and ruin “.

renjun doesn’t find being left alone all that bad, if he can just perpetually avoid jisung for the fraction of the day he has to work, then it all should be fine.

he holds onto the hug you gave him before you left, a gesture of affection he probably wouldn’t have accepted from anyone else, but let you do because.. well, he supposes it’s obvious.

“don’t get so freaked out, jisung is practically harmless” you told him, hands placed on his shoulders as you stared with your wide pupils full of fondness.

renjun could only respond with the scrunch of his face. what did you mean by ‘practically?’

he didn’t get to question it, jaemin dragged you off before he could even open his mouth, but not before shooting renjun one of his creepy looking grins. if he didn’t know any better, renjun would’ve asked to go as well, if not for the sake of being around you, but also so he could keep an eye on na jaemin.

renjun decides to occupy most of his day in meetings, doing extra work yangyang was much too lazy to do on his own. he hangs around the southernmost laboratory until kun has to usher him out, his excuses quickly defuse, and he has no choice but to trudge his way back to the main floor.

jisung is fixated on the distinguishing features of the model above him when renjun first runs into him that day, a copy of frankenstein left opened to a specific page on his lap. he tilts his head as he observes the unmoving solar system replica, his finger comes to caress the pages of the book, renjun can just barely make out scribbled writing on the individual pages. after a few more seconds of staring, he turns to the side. “hi” he blinks those terrifyingly realistic eyes. “busy day?”

renjun clears his throat, a wave of shame washing over him at such a question. jisung probably didn’t mean it, but he could probably sense that renjun’s avoidance was slightly purposeful. “uh— yeah, sort of, you could say that..”

he again goes to picking at his fingers, feeling the others eyes zero in on the movement. he lets a breath fall, attempting to change the topic, he starts; “what are you looking at?”

his feet seemingly have a mind of their own, as renjun finds himself beside jisung in no time, hands now placed in his lap. his eyes flit downward, ah, he knew it, jisung is reading one of your copies, he notices your straight handwriting right away.

“the solar system model” he whispers, eyes again traveling upward. “all these planets.. which one am i supposed to go to?”

renjun is a bit taken aback by that question, it’s a little unexpected, but he guesses it is what he was programmed for. he blinks, seemingly heating up under his stare. “um.. jupiter, that’s where your mission is dedicated”.

jisung hums, and renjun simply remains freaked out. it’s all too human like, was that on your part or jaemin’s? he’s now insanely curious.

“what are you reading?”

jisung perks up, as if startled by his spontaneous query. “frankenstein, y/n likes reading, he says this is one of his favorites”.

renjun snickers, how nice. “yeah, y/n is obsessed with science fiction in all of it’s forms”.

jisung nods. “i like it, the story is.. a bit ironic but it’s beautifully written”.

renjun’s lips immediately turn downward, while he expected for jisung to be aware of that one, it’s sort of sad to hear the tone of his voice when he says the word ‘ironic’.

jisung’s gaze bores through him, it’s reminiscent of how your eyes seem to burn into literally everyone’s soul, seeing their innermost thoughts with eyes seemingly devoid of anything. “are you alright?” he asks, sensing the mismatched thoughts muddled up in renjun’s mind.

“oh.. um, fine”.

jisung blinks, his eyelids fluttering in a freakishly realistic manner. his expressions have no right to seem so real. “something seems wrong”.

“are you programmed to notice things like that?”

jisung contemplates for a moment, as if genuinely thinking about how he should reply to it. “i’m not sure actually”.

renjun isn’t sure of that answer. “does it have something to do with the conference?”

renjun almost jumps back once again. jisung tilts his head, eyelids curving upward, lips pressed into a thin line. “is your mind stuck on y/n?”

oh, that’s fucking creepy, surely that can’t be programmed right?

unfortunately, no one is around to answer that question for renjun.

he shakes his head though completely wrong. “no..”

renjun is sure that anyone, android or not, could decipher the falsity behind his tone. “what’s wrong? did you two fight?”

“..no”.

“but you seem upset”.

curse this jisung, renjun can barely breathe without him dropping yet another accusation. shit. how obvious is he then? donghyuck must know, then that means jaemin is possibly aware, and that means jeno..

fuck.

“i guess— i don’t know, y/n is just so confusing, he’s complicated, can’t help feeling how i feel”.

oh what is wrong with renjun? he’s pouring his feelings out to this android that was created by the person he has a crush not crush on, surely anyone with a working mind would see that this is pretty much crazy. “you love him”.

renjun’s gasp is immediate, and he has no idea why he seems as offended as he is. “i— what? of course i love him but not like that..”

“he loves you too” jisung’s gaze is reminiscent of yours, stars seemingly dazzling behind his irises in the same manner as yours. how does that happen? did you mold him after you or something? it’s not that you two look alike, it’s more about the specific mannerisms renjun has gotten used to seeing from you. “he loves everybody, jeno, donghyuck, jaeminie, even me, i can’t really believe that”.

“y/n loves everything he creates”.

“no it’s—” he uncharacteristically pauses, weird. “it’s not like that, he loves me like i’m not a project, like i.. as if i’m not just here so you guys can discover more about space, like i’m more than that”.

oh, renjun didn’t think about it like that. he hums, tapping his fingers onto his knee. jisung seems defeated, which again perturbs renjun in the slightest, as he’s assumed all feelings are simply programmed, not that they can change naturally in their own way on their own accord.

you’re driving yourself into a wall, you’re going to hurt yourself in the end, and jisung even knows it himself.

“jaeminie does too, they take care of me”.

renjun doesn’t know what he expected, but it wasn’t this. jisung again glances upward at the model of the solar system, eyes remaining fixated on the mold of jupiter. that’s where he is going. “i don’t really know how you feel, but y/n is.. he isn’t feeling that different”.

speak for yourself, y/n loves everyone, even doyoung, and the fucker tried to fire him.

renjun decides to keep that one to himself, his cheeks now tinted red, an unknown heat coming out of nowhere.

okay, maybe jisung isn’t that bad.

IX.                     “ life, although it may be only an accumulation of anguish, is dear to me, and i will defend it “.

over the coming weeks, jisung becomes more of a mundane figure in everyone’s lives.

the attachment both you and jaemin have is clear, as creators of jisung, you pretty much treat him like he’s your kid or something (which jeno supposes he is but that’s only due to the obvious). the proprietary technology is shared between you both, all the other three did was fill you two with the correct knowledge and program the actual useful things. how to collect samples, how to analyze a mass spectrometry reading, how to identify potential life and share data on environmental conditions, not to mention everything that even goes into operating a spacecraft.

“what do you mean?” jaemin tilts his head, feigned resentment behind his eyes with jisung keeping his head laid onto his shoulder. he’s asleep, or.. off, jeno is unsure of how exactly it all works, but jisung’s eyes are closed, so jeno assumes he’s asleep. “you’re implying his skills weren’t useful before, i programmed him to dance, that’s useful”.

jisung’s chest rises and sinks, then it happens again. his lashes flutter, mouth parting as if releasing a sigh. jeno has to hand it to the both you and jaemin, because for all your eccentricism, you two are insanely talented. every part of jisung is painstakingly lifelike, delicately crafted. even jeno forgets when he looks at him, sometimes, that he isn’t alive at all.

“why?” jeno asks, because of course he does. the basis of his career draws from the most intrigued of queries, asking questions is all he knows how to do. “how is that useful?”

jisung shifts for a moment, then he rises, back straightening as he blinks awake, eyelids fluttering as he settles into the air of the room. “it makes people happy” jaemin opts to whisper, nothing but pure endearment behind his eyes as he stares. “isn’t that useful?”

not useful to the mission, not useful to scientific achievement, were hitting a brick wall here.

jisung’s eye flit around the room, unfocused. when he processes jaemin’s face, his lips curve into a smile. when his eyes land on jeno, his smile only widens, which startles the other enough that his replying smile is awkward.

“good morning” jaemin coos, brushing a strand of hair behind jisung’s ear.

“it’s eight twenty seven o’clock” jisung replies, matter of factly. he blinks again at jaemin, observing as the older juts out his lip. he then pauses, mind seemingly re-wiring.

“good morning” he tries again. “i love you”.

jaemin’s resounding laughter is full of so much elation that jeno can even see his teeth, and he squeezes jisung tighter, completely enamored.

jeno guesses he’s pretty adorable.

jisung again blinks his terrifyingly realistic eyes, his pupils holding curiosity. “where is y/n?”

he doesn’t yet give mention to renjun and donghyuck’s absence, but jeno guesses it’s due to jisung being quite used to seeing you around once he wakes up. he tilts his head in jeno’s direction, as if also expecting an answer from him. jaemin clears his throat, ruffling his hair. “y/n had to leave at six for early work, he’ll be back soon”.

jeno scans the look of simply affection at the mention of you, not just from jisung, but also from jaemin. jisung’s face falls in a display of worry, jeno finds that rich. “y/n typically works every single day, do you know why jeno?”

being put on the spot, jeno again startles, his face going pale. he contemplates for a moment, feeling jisung’s eyes seep through him in a burning gaze, it’s a little scary. “i— um..”

“were back!” donghyuck fortunately comes to save his ass, kicking down the door in a bang so loud it cuts jeno off immediately. “and we brought food” renjun continues, he places the bag he holds onto the nearby table, right in front of jisung. he fixates on it, scanning the plastic before him. “and hello you!” donghyuck seems to feel a similar extent of adoration in correlation with both you and jaemin, as he leans downward to press a kiss to his cheek, drawing a small sound from him.

“good morning..” he mutters, shying away from the act of affection. jeno finds donghyuck’s attachment to jisung a little more surprising, renjun definitely took a while to warm up, but donghyuck didn’t really need that much time, the other previously expressed concerns to jeno about using androids when the project began, but it seems that all the worry has since dissipated. he was smitten, he still is.

renjun was much more weary at first, but he’s slowly getting used to his presence, jeno guesses something that had to do with the day they were gone for the conference.

“y/n still not back?” donghyuck inquires, unease hidden by his usually bright smile. he leans onto his own fist, watching jisung seem enraptured by the sight of human food. jisung decides to respond by shaking his head, seemingly sensing the tension between donghyuck and jaemin.

donghyuck clears his throat, keeping silent as he hands jaemin over what he ordered, again avoiding eye contact. oh, they still haven’t attempted to sort a few of the differences, or maybe they talked during the conference, jeno can’t exactly remember.

“he does nothing but work” renjun’s words are muffled by the bits of toast he chews, something of irritation in his pupils. “seriously, never shuts down..”

“i heard that” it isn’t an understatement to say that everyone practically lights up when you walk through the door. jeno likes to think that he displays his adoration the best, with his ‘samoyed likeness’ and all (that’s what you and donghyuck say). there’s a warmth that emanates from your presence, a tired smile clinging to your lips. “not a workaholic, i’m just good at my job”.

“they can go hand in hand”.

jisung showcases his biggest smile of the morning, almost jumping from his seat in an effort to hug you. of course, donghyuck gets there first, squeezing the oxygen out of you. “you got here just in time, breakfast is here, eat, then go nap”.

you snort. “don’t give me demands”.

“are you not tired?” renjun opts to pipe in, it’s a rather idiotic question, everybody knows you’re tired, the bags are about to sink into your skin, but you simply wave a dismissive hand, eyes shining jisung’s way.

“enough of that, how’s my baby?”

jisung just manages a yelp before you wrap your arms around him and they tighten. oh you love him, it hurts jeno’s heart in a sickening way, you’re simply enraptured. jeno can’t help but notice jaemin, who looks equally as so, but not towards jisung, more towards you.

jaemin’s scoff of annoyance is feigned. “our, and he’s good, he was looking for you”.

“why do you work all the time?”

jisung blinks in his regular jisung manner, which jeno finds off putting, he’s beginning to note the androids individual mannerisms. “because i like to work”.

“nobody likes to work, do you have problems?”

donghyuck snorts, hiding his giggles behind his hands when he notices your peripheral glare. jeno whistles as he feigns ignorance, attempting to keep his laughs down in his head. renjun simply blinks, sending an amusing stare jisung’s way.

you raise your eyebrows, jeno guesses it was something you didn’t expect. “no jisung, it’s just when you get used to pulling all nighters as an intern, it bleeds into you pulling all nighters in general”.

“that sounds like a problem” jisung replies in a tone that implies genius. jeno supposes he does know all, but you instead stick out your tongue.

“shhh” you press a finger to his lips, completely shutting him up.

donghyuck is still giggling, maybe the act of an android asking their creator if they have problems is a degree of humor he doesn’t expect. renjun simply finds the display cute, there’s no need for words, jeno knows how he feels.

he decides to turn away, pushing down any other thoughts, he knows your time together is limited, this attachment is only making such a thing worse.

his stomach twists into something ugly, and he swallows down nothing.

X.                     “ nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change “.

it isn’t that difficult to come across you in the dead of night.

that seems to be when your most active, na jaemin only scales the halls at midnight because of the anxiety he feels rising. of course, he won’t divulge to anybody that those worries are present, really renjun doesn’t seem to enjoy talking, jeno is much too sweet for him to handle, and donghyuck.. he’s a character.

you weren’t wrong about the all nighter claim, as his eyes fixate on your figure, flipping through coding documents in a manner that’s simply so entrancing. his hands remain shoved in his pockets, his stare endless as you carry on with your coding admiration. he then smiles, why are you like this?

“rough night?” he finally speaks into the air, startling you suddenly. you settle into a silent chuckle, an empty cup of coffee dormant on the table before you. his gaze softens, and he steps closer to you, shoulders brushing in a brief moment.

“not exactly, just last minute observations, launch is soon..”

when you mutter those words, the air seems to still. it shouldn’t come as a surprise, jisung wasn’t created to be cute and tell you two he loves you, jisung was created to explore a planet uninhabitable to humans, project apollo is supposed to be just that.

jaemin takes in a deep breath. “yep, launch soon”.

the repeated words does nothing but add to the stillness of the air, which only elevates your feelings about the whole thing. you stack the papers on top of one another, sucking your teeth. “you don’t usually work with others, right? i hope i lived up to your expectations”.

it’s much more than that, why do you gaze as if i display constellations over my cheek? why do your eyes dazzle in that way? why are you you?

“you exceeded them, you’re exceptional”.

jaemin mistakens the blush on your cheeks as something other than platonic, but could you blame him? you could simply be flattered.. and na jaemin should be allowed a delusion once in a while. “i have to assume some of those words are exaggerated”.

“take the compliment”.

he doesn’t inherently beg, but the plea is heard as an undertone. you snicker, scratching behind your ear. “i could say the same, i was trying my best to impress you..”

“you didn’t exactly need me, you’re a powerhouse you know?”

you again giggle, flattery high in the air. “couldn’t have done it without you, jisung is dear to me”.

jaemin hums, shoulders again brushing with yours. “he’s basically our son anyway”.

“you’re really trying to sell that”.

“it’s true, isn’t it?”

your smile is soft, yes, it is true, but the words aren’t spoken. you again glance downward at the stack of papers formerly grasping at your attention, urging for jaemin to talk your ear off. “i guess..”

jaemin grabs at the opportunity to admire your side profile, he isn’t all about the star knowledge, but according to the many whispers from you, tonight is when the constellation auriga is present in the night sky. you said that it’s one of your favorites, auriga imitates the shape of a hexagon once all the stars connect in the sky. it’s always around your birthday that it is visible in the sky, your eyes gleam with an intrigue that could also be mistaken for enchantment.

it’s funny.

“i can teach you all there is about constellations”.

jaemin’s smile mirrors the bewitchment hidden in his pupils. “that would be nice”.

he actually doesn’t care, but the act of you talking while jaemin simply listens is his ideal type of date.

you hum, again glancing up as you pause. you blink, your stare endless as jaemin registers the sudden closeness of you two. the stars are aligning in the sky tonight, jaemin can’t help but observe the patterns of your moles and how they replicate the positions of the stars you so dearly love. everything about you is so beautiful, beautiful in a manner reminiscent of the astral cluster he usually pays no mind to.

jaemin’s gaze travels, your lips are very pretty, interesting. he’s listened around, he’s aware that he probably isn’t the only person here with such interests in you specifically, but this is probably the closest anyone has ever gotten in that regard.

you feign ignorance, eyes shifting as you notice where jaemin stares. either you’re nervous, or you simply have no idea what to say.

and really, jaemin wants to, he wants to so bad, it wouldn’t even be that much of a movement, if he just leaned closer just the slightest..

he stops himself before he can get any closer.

“you should get some sleep now, seriously” jaemin opts to say, cutting off his own thoughts with a complete topic switch. “come on.. please?”

there’s a slight whine to his tone, and your lips do an upward turn at the question, a small snicker falling from them. “maybe a few more minutes?”

“do you want for me to use force?”

you again grin at that one, smoothly sliding the stack of papers into a folder. you blow a breath between your lips, clasping your hands together. “fine then, i’ll sleep”.

“you will, i’m going to be watching you the whole entire time”.

“creep”.

jaemin sticks out his tongue as a response.

XI.                     “ how mutable are our feelings, and how strange is that clinging love we have of life in the excess of misery! “.

on the day of launch, jaemin wears all black, a sentiment to how he must be feeling. donghyuck doesn’t attempt to reach out, the sharp looks he earns are enough to keep him silent. you seem to take it a little better, not exactly wearing all black, but also unable to keep up the fixed smiles you use to erase worry.

everyone looks like they haven’t slept in a week, which, to be fair, they probably haven’t. donghyuck pays little attention to jaemin in his all, but he knows the other is missing a good week of shut eye. jeno was up all night with stomach dropping anxiety, he continuously tossed and turned in his bed, eyes remaining open until the sun rose above the horizon. renjun keeps silent, but he isn’t having a better time either, his eyes continuously fluttering shut on the commute to work.

this is supposed to be the best day of your career, what you’ve been working towards since the start of the stupid internship you all accepted. still, you all just seem the slightest bit miserable, even on the supposed happiest day of your lives.

breakfast is silent, you leave early enough that donghyuck doesn’t catch you until you all gather at the laboratory, listening to the machinery emanating noise from each corner of the room.

jaemin sits down beside him, and while donghyuck wishes to peacefully ignore his presence, it’s rendered difficult with him now right there. the younger seemingly longs to make an effort, but donghyuck still can’t talk to him without thinking of what he last said to him.

(“i almost kissed him, you know” he recalls jaemin speaking into the air five days ago, why jaemin decided to say it to him? donghyuck will never know. donghyuck paused his sorting of documents, blinking as he turned the way of his pink haired acquaintance. his face scrunched inquiringly, as if he had no idea who jaemin was talking to whilst he was the only one in close distance to him.

“who? jeno?” donghyuck’s eyes shifted his way, gaze lingering on your hands, which stayed massaging jeno’s shoulders across the room.

“what? no” jaemin replied, seemingly offended by such a suggestion, even with his insistence that jeno is ‘a pretty good looking guy..’.

donghyuck again blinked, licking his lips as his gaze settled onto jaemin once more. “so.. who?”

jaemin didn’t speak it out, simply motioned his head in the direction donghyuck stared a brief moment prior. donghyuck processed his words slowly, then his eyes widened in a manner he had absolutely no idea they could.

“y/n?” donghyuck couldn’t hide the contempt of his tone, yeah jaemin did say ‘almost’, but does that really matter? jaemin was the new guy, yet he was the only one who managed to get close enough, his jealousy wasn’t exactly unreasonable.

because donghyuck could understand how it is with jeno, he’d gotten much used to it at that point. no, how could na jaemin just.. find the courage so easily? it was an ego bruiser he didn’t expect.

“so why didn’t you then?” donghyuck hid his scorn behind more disdain he tried to use as a weapon, a wall, it didn’t matter. “and why are you telling me about this?”

“i don’t know.. guess i just felt he wouldn’t want it”.

jaemin sounded hurt, how rich. if donghyuck had to guess who you’d be with out of everyone else in the team, it would probably be jaemin, the newbie who’s just as much a robot nerd as you are. it was a match made in heaven.

“i’m not the one he wants”.

donghyuck assumed he was lying at that point, jaemin was playing with him, taunting him with knowledge only he had from the variety of time he spent with you. “sure, and did he tell you that?”

jaemin’s shrug was empty. “he didn’t have to, just.. if you get the opportunity, then you should probably take it”.

what the fuck.

did na jaemin really just tell donghyuck that if he had the opportunity to kiss you, he should take it? the other stared into practically nothing, jaemin finished with what he had to say, there were no more words left for him to utter.

“..alright”.)

donghyuck can’t exactly resist the urge, which is unfortunate for him because he had a good avoiding jaemin track record that’s pretty golden to him. is he really that curious?

“you okay?” donghyuck inquires, an eyebrow raise being his go to add on. jaemin looks one snap away from punching him, his balled up fist frightens donghyuck, who scoots one seat away to ensure his own safety. for all of jaemin’s expressions, donghyuck has never seen him look so unhappy. grumpy, sometimes. irritated, mostly with him, but the grief marring his expression is much too intense.

jaemin’s gaze remains fixated on you, performing regular actions that appear to be much more because of how you do it. “not sure what i was expecting” he whispers so quietly it aches. “jupiter is far away, it’ll take him only seven months, guess i can commend you guys for that one”.

right, any regular journey to jupiter would take six years at best, the architecture of project apollo as a whole is really the saving grace of this mission. donghyuck would probably die having to wait six years for jisung and the spacecraft to even land on jupiter, he can’t imagine how you’d feel.

“god fuck this”.

donghyuck glances your way, eyeing the shine in your irises as you gaze upon a model of jupiter, jisung’s cheek pressed onto your shoulder. jupiter has never been your favorite planet, you often deem it ‘the overrated planet’, because, in your own words; “it’s color scheme isn’t my favorite, all that helium nauseates me”.

you can always find something to focus on, even the things that seem so unimportant. “anything can be unique if you’re open minded enough hyuckie”.

he barely contains his giggles at the recollection of your words, he’s afraid of asking about your feelings, because while you’ve never been one to give snippy responses, there’s still a voice in the back of his mind reminding him of your unpredictability, he shouldn’t be so quick to think that.

“he’ll be fine”.

“jisung is like.. his pride and joy, he won’t take it well”.

and clearly, neither will you.

donghyuck forbids such words from escaping his lips, launch is in an hour, he should focus.

XII.                     “ when falsehood can look so like the truth, who can assure themselves of certain happiness? “.

jisung’s first communication falls on a sunday.

renjun remembers the day of the week because it comes the day after donghyuck’s birthday. he specifically remembered that one because you all spent donghyuck’s birthday at the lab, paired with little to no bickering with jaemin, and a privilege which included being able to kiss you all he wanted. it’s somewhere around four in the morning that renjun jolts awake from where he laid down on his desk to find you staring at the screen in wide-eyed awe.

<<< …happy birthday donghyuck!

<<< good morning, i love you. did i miss it?

it would usually take months, even up to years for messages to travel this far. that was a long while ago, though. now, it only takes a good twenty three hours for messages to be received, which is definitely shorter than the time it takes to travel there. seven months, you now spend much more time at the laboratory than prior, waiting by the screen in the control room for any kind of message.

there isn’t a character limit to the messages, conversations can go on forever, like he never left. sort of like he never left, renjun thinks it’s a bit off in terms of timing, but it’s enough to please both you and jaemin.

renjun scurries closer, face illuminated by the dark blue screen.

jisung takes pictures of a lot of important things, just like he was programmed to do. sometimes, he doesn’t even photograph things that are that important, yet it can still be perceived as such.

jaemin appears out of nowhere, arms folded over his chest as he squints his eyes at the screen right in front of him. renjun has enough energy to produce a lethargic chuckle.

<<< i think this ball of gas kind of looks like a bunny, doesn’t it?

<<< [IMAGE ATTACHED]

“oh, i see it” jaemin breaths, blinking a few times in a pattern of recognition.

donghyuck jolts awake from where he’d been quietly snoring on jeno’s shoulder. “i do too”.

your nose scrunches, just barely registering renjun’s hand coming to hold yours. “yeah, same here”.

<<< the stars are really beautiful right now!

<<< see? it’s aquarius, y/nie said that’s one of his favorites!

<<< remember?

<<< did jaemin lose his ring yet?

right, the ring. it was a request on jisung’s part, everyone got matching rings after he saw snow for the first time. jaemin did lose the ring actually, it slipped down into the cushions of the main room and he lost his mind trying to find it. he seemed so genuinely torn up by it that everyone swore to secrecy, much too afraid of how jisung would react to such news.

“of course not” you’re quick to lie, nudging jaemin with your shoulder. “next time you see the stars like that, make sure to take a picture with you in it okay? i miss seeing your face”.

there’s a hint of anguish in your tone, your eyes a shade of red that’s terrifying to an impossible extent. renjun continues to caress your hands with are still laced together, thumb smoothing over your knuckles as a gesture of fondness. it’ll be okay, i’m here, everyone is here, we get how you feel.

the words aren’t spoken, simply dissolved.

for the next few minutes, you all take turns replying to jisung’s messages, and renjun can tell, all of you needed this. though it’d be hard to reach such words through all your pigheaded attitudes, it’s nice knowing that a message finally came around, there was an anxiety in the air that all of you could feel, yet you simply left unsaid.

it’s hard to be here without him sometimes, because though it won’t be said, everyone feels as if they’re missing a piece of themselves with him gone. renjun never thought he would be able to get to this point, he never thought an attachment was even possible, he guesses he was wrong about that part.

donghyuck again passes out against jeno when it’s all over, jaemin placing a hand on your shoulder which lingers before he again settles on a nearby chair.

you remain stuck on the bright blue light which permeates from the screen, seemingly enraptured. renjun stays beside you, hands still together.

“he’ll be okay” he whispers, not exactly sure of those words but speaking them anyway. he wants to ensure at least a measure of peace for you, anything to result in the anxiety dissipating from your features. “trust yourself, alright?”

you don’t respond, simply blink once again.

it’s your own way of uttering the words; i don’t know if i can.

XIII.                     “ man, i cried, ‘how ignorant art thou in thy pride of wisdom!’ “.

it isn’t helped by the fact that nine months into project apollo’s first mission, jisung suddenly goes offline.

“what do you mean he’s gone offline?” jaemin reiterates, as if the prospect of that actually being possible is completely off the table.

i told you so, jeno thinks in his mind, his heart sinks into his stomach. of course this was going to happen, i knew this was going to happen.

donghyuck looks helpless, something that is frightening to jeno, not surprising, unnerving. “comms to the ship are still active for now” he explains, voice just barely holding up against an upcoming tremble. “calm down, we’re still trying to reach him, maybe he’s just late to respond, maybe—”

“he’s never late” jaemin cuts in, hair tousled in every direction. jeno is, again, terrified. the room is silent, if you take away the arguing, renjun is tryibg his best to keep himself together, and your own silence is nerve-racking, your eyes trained on the screen before you. “he’s never late donghyuck, so don’t tell me to fucking calm down alright? have you checked the log for any unusual activity?”

jeno is grateful for his ringing ears, the argument bleeding out into uncomfortable background noise. you bite down into your bottom lip, quickly drawing blood with the force you put into your action. jeno almost breaks the silence by inquiring to you about the whole thing, but of course, they can’t shut up.

“this was probably caused by your shitty work, so much for your robotic skills” donghyuck makes sure to mock jaemin’s voice, jabbing a finger in the square of her chest, crowding in his face.

“my fault?” jaemin scoffs, pushing him back with a heavy shove of the shoulder. “my work is fucking flawless, donghyuck, don’t take out your frustrations on me because you miscalculated and caused this mess!”

“oh but that’s exactly what you’re doing now isn’t it? don’t try to act so high and mighty when you’re genuinely being a fucking hypocrite!”

it seems that this fight is about to well out into the physical territory, but you then speak up; “if you two can’t be quiet then you should just get out”.

you pinch the bridge of your nose, grinding your teeth in motions which displays your irritation. no, it isn’t your tone, it’s your actions. your voice is simply soft, a whisper that could barely be heard even in the pin drop silence.

they both long to sneak in one last word, jeno can see it in the twitching of their facial muscles, but as to not upset you, they shut up. donghyuck huffs, storming his way out, unfortunately not taking the awkwardness of it all with him. it’s not long before jaemin exits as well, but not before he glances at you with simply.. grief.

renjun only continues his silence as a form of fear, jeno knows you wouldn’t, but he’s also aware that part of him is afraid to speak in fear of pissing you off.

you kick at the station in front of you, not hard, but it still earns a flinch. you suck your teeth, just barely registering jeno’s presence beside you. “i just need time to think..” you mutter, resting your head against the control panel.

there’s a beat of silence which prolongs. it’s too much of time, it’s as if your fate hangs in the air, something of an unknown future that none of you can control no matter how much you attempt to. there can’t be another failure, renjun and jeno know that enough, the glances they exchange only elevate that point.

“do you really think he’s just late to respond?” you ask, blinking away some sort of devastation behind your eyes. it’s less of saddening and more of terrifying, everyone remembers the mess which was project athena, how much of a terrible state the failure of the mission put you in, this is really your last shot at this, whether you’re aware or not.

“i hope not, i—”

“that’s not what i asked jen, please” you aren’t one to plead. jeno hates it, you’re usual carefree attitude accompanied by pride replaced by pure agony. jeno can’t give you a sure answer, because he doesn’t know, and the fact itself is enough to amplify his own anxiety.

his mouth twists. “..no” it seems you expected that answer, but the disappointment is still clear. “but i don’t know what could’ve possibly gone wrong”.

jeno catches the twitch of your left eye, and he allows for your head to fall onto his shoulder. “what if they were right?” you say, rising from your place, pupils blown out in a frightened manner. “what if it’s my fault and we never get to see him again? what if—”

“y/n” jeno doesn’t let you finish, he grabs your hands and soothes his thumbs over the soft skin. “don’t say that, we’re going to see him again” he hopes his expression conveys the.. truth in his words. “we will, swear”.

renjun opts to rub the back of your shoulder in an attempt to calm your nerves. you take in a deep breath, blinking downward towards the floor. “right, i’m not gonna stop trying..” you mutter, smoothing your hands over your face.

the truth is, the moment jisung left, everyone knew that this was possible, that failure could be on the horizon whenever, no matter your circumstances. it’s the slightest bit comforting to know that, offline or not, jisung is still out there. that means there’s also a possibility of bringing him back too.

jeno knows you’ll take any chance there is, it doesn’t matter how much you have to put into it.

<<< my battery is getting low.

<<< it’s cold, i’m going to sleep. just for a little bit..

XIV.                 ��   “ …the companions of our childhood always possess a certain power over our minds which hardly any later friend can obtain “.

that’s unfortunately easier said than done. you’ve been trying to contact jisung for three months, but the government isn’t going to fund a rescue mission to save something they don’t even deem alive, no matter the persuasion or the arguments put up against them.

project apollo was a success, prototype 205 served it’s purpose. there is no reason to organize a mission to rescue the android or the spacecraft it piloted, it’s all said and done.

one official asks jaemin, “can’t you just make a new one?”

he leaves the question without comment.

jaemin heard from fleeting whispers that doyoung decides to keep your position. interesting. he opts to locking himself in his own apartment for two weeks, practically sinking into his feat of isolation until you and renjun have to forcibly drag him out back to work then to your apartment.

he doesn’t verbalize his thanks, he instead decides to cook breakfast for all of you as his own silent appreciation.

sinking into work is mundane for you, and when jaemin slowly slips into similar habits, he can’t help but think of you.

good morning, i love you. i love you, i love you, i love you, i lov—

“seems like you need it” a cup of coffee is placed onto the table before him, and the dragging chair releases a cry as you take a seat. “please drink it” you plead, now much too used to the sight of jaemin’s frown.

he gives a glance, then, he smiles, not too big of a smile, simply a small one. it’s nice to be alone with you for once, just for a little while.. over coffee..

“too much caffeine, i might go crazy”.

“think it’s a little too late to be worrying about that one” you decide to respond, tapping onto the table in a specific pattern. you take jaemin’s hand into yours, examining his bare fingers. “i can get you a new one”.

“it’d be like replacing it” jisung would know.

there’s a certain look of distaste behind your eyes jaemin so wishes he could decipher, because for all his smarts, it feels that you’re specifically difficult to solve. he can’t decode you no matter how hard he tries.

a frown tugs at your lips, as if you’ve been in a difficult spot, you speak; “i’ll pay, just.. think about it”.

i won’t give up on him.

we won’t give up on him.

(“neptune is really your favorite?” jaemin inquired with a clear indication that it was an eye-opener for him. even jisung seemed surprised by such a revelation, his human like eyes blinking once, twice, thrice as you began chuckling at the shared expressions.

“what? did you not expect it or something?” you giggled, head tipping downward as you fixed the placement of your glasses. “it’s the planet i’m most interested in, even before my internship”.

jaemin recalls the manner in which jisung glanced over at him, the intrigue behind his eyes reminiscent of your very own. there was a warmth in his chest that he’s sure could never be replicated, not only due to jisung, but also due to you. he blinked as he ruffled the other’s hair, again staring your way. “it’s always been more about the robotics for me”.

there was a conflict in your expression. “are you telling me you don’t have a favorite planet?”

the playfulness of your expression betrayed the gravitas you attempted to display, because you really couldn’t contain your amusement, jisung blinked up at jaemin, sharing the confusion with you. “even jisung has one, have you really not thought about it?”

jaemin shook his head, now the one under speculation. “space is not a huge interest of mine”.

“that’s boring!” jisung whined, and your hum of agreement earned an eyebrow raise. jaemin’s gasp of offense was most definitely overdramatized, and jisung giggled at the expression. “it doesn’t have to be deep or anything, just pick one, my favorite is saturn..”

jaemin had to resist a coo at jisung’s irresistible charm, he again twirled a strand of jisung’s hair between his finger. “i guess.. venus?”

both you and jisung let out a synonymous groan, drawing a sigh of irritation from jaemin. “of course you picked the boring one” jisung mumbled, jaemin’s resounding gasp full of the vexation he felt.

“what is that supposed to mean!?”

“jisungie is calling you boring nana”.

jaemin allowed for his bottom lip to jut out, his arms folding over his chest in a feigned display of stubbornness as he heard jisung begin snickering.

and you? you were simply enamored. jaemin was too, but for a contrasting reason.)

jaemin looks up at you, your gaze trained on your now empty cup of coffee. the smell remains lingered in the air, jaemin hasn’t touched his yet, much too busy reminiscing on specific memories. you zone out much too easily, he snaps his fingers in front of your face, and you startle out of it. “why’d you dye your hair pink?”

there’s a childish curiosity lacing your tone, nail scratching at the metal surface of the table. jaemin keeps his hum light, his eyes traveling towards the model of the solar system, lasering on jupiter. fucking jupiter. “i like pink”.

you seem to enjoy that answer. “it’s pretty”.

jaemin unconsciously tenses, nails picking at his cuticles. “..thank you”.

he knows the sudden anxiety doesn’t go past you, nothing ever goes past you, it’s just the slightest bit frightening. the upward curve of your eyes imitates your very own smile, and you slide your chair backward, rising from your spot. “don’t worry, alright?”

jaemin isn’t sure it’s that easy, but for you, he’ll be sure to try.

he clears his throat, pulling you into a quick embrace that catches you off guard, if your small yelp is any indication. he can’t help the tightening of his arms, pressing himself against you in a moment of clarity. you chuckle into the air, reciprocating the affectionate gesture with your arms around his waist. “sorry, too surprising?” he mumbles into your shoulder.

he simply needed this.

“no, it’s alright, sometimes everyone needs a hug”.

jaemin squeezes again, taking a deep breath. he keeps silent for a while, remaining stuck to you as he collects his next few words. “i love you” he whispers, lips doing a downturn.

your eyebrow raises, and jaemin is sure you heard those words, because you chuckle again.

XV.                     “ my spirit will sleep in peace; or if it thinks, it will not surely think thus. farewell “.

jisung’s birthday is on february fifth. when jeno inquired as to why, you stated that “he fits much of the aquarius qualities”.

jeno took the initiative to study it. aquarius is the eleventh astrological sign, originating from the eponymous constellation. it’s ruling planet is uranus. aquarius are famously innovative, creative, analytical, spirited, loyal, loyalty, you muttered it to him the first time everyone met jisung, when he asked you about his name, your nails tracing the spelling into the palm of his hand. he finds it nice how things like that come back around.

tonight, aquarius is in the night sky. aquarius is one of your favorite constellations (but now that jeno thinks about it, all of them seem to be your favorite). jisung has never been able to see it, he left for jupiter before the constellation would be present in the sky, but both you and jaemin made sure to inform him of its existence, with him being an aquarius.

jeno disappointedly watches as the hope quickly dissipates from both your and jaemin’s expressions the longer days go without a message from jisung. you haven’t given up just yet, you’ll never give up on jisung, you told jeno that yourself.

project apollo remains running, the spacecraft is all intact, but there hasn’t been an update on jisung at all. the visible unhappiness gracing your features is upsetting, jeno can’t recall the last time you were so down, your usual cheerfulness no longer around to comfort him.

donghyuck tries his best, managing to squeeze a few well deserved giggles out of you. there seems to be something off with jaemin, he avoids eye contact with you in the most not jaemin like way possible, strange. in contrast to him, renjun is much more.. well.. willing to approach.

really, jeno guesses it must be obvious by now, and jeno doesn’t just mean renjun. he means him, donghyuck, jaemin, all of them alike, they don’t have to repeat it for all of them to know how it feels.

donghyuck has slowly hinted to jeno over the years since he’s joined, but he never acts upon it. jeno never knew why, he always thought the headstrong, perverse donghyuck would take up such a challenge, yet he never attempted. he assumed that you and donghyuck would be a pretty good match.

but he only ever thought that because he assumed it would quell his own jealousy.

renjun could never hide it well enough, his easy blushing stuttering words gave it away pretty quickly. it wasn’t even a week after his initial arrival that he probably realized.

jaemin.. jaemin was always the hardest to decode for jeno. maybe the bonding over robots, and by proxy, the creation of jisung, was what caused the enchantment. jeno can’t even find it in himself to be possessive or jealous of any sort, he just.. gets it. jaemin is captivated by every single one of your actions, jeno has never been able to share such a feeling with a person.

renjun’s cheek presses against the window, gaze trained on the barely visible stars in the sky. you hum the familiar tune of ‘shining star’ by earth wind and fire, engrossed in the song you’ve become so accustomed to. jeno knows why, he recalls you uttering; “it’s a classic, got me through university and this stupid internship..”

jeno finds your descriptions of things, even the things that usually don’t matter, to be so beautiful.

“words are just so great, you know? i can call anything pretty, beautiful, amazing, prepossessing, it’s just so.. fitting”.

jeno adores you, adores your heart and your soul and your fondness towards the weirdest of adjectives.

jeno taps in rhythm with your humming, the lyrics aren’t sung, but he can still picture them in his mind.

you’re a shining star

no matter who you are

shining bright to see

what you could truly be

you’re a shining star..

“should we go stargazing?”

instantly donghyuck perks up, his hair all over the place. jeno chuckles at the sight, reaching over to put at least some of the strands back in place. “what time is it?” he mumbles, staring down at his bare wrist, no watch in sight.

“twenty minutes to midnight” jaemin replies, glancing over at the window, squinting in an attempt to get a better view of the constellations. “doesn’t seem like a bad idea”.

“aquarius is in the night sky”.

right, renjun’s constellation knowledge is easily comparative to yours. you slip on a sweater as you tap donghyuck on the shoulder, then intertwining your fingers with jeno’s. “oh don’t tell me we’re going to sneak up?”

there’s a fitting expression of amusement gracing your features, but you don’t respond, simply humming.

jaemin doesn’t put up much of a fight, renjun seems enthralled by such an idea, jeno is aware that he often sneaks up onto the roof to watch the stars from time to time, donghyuck makes brash comments every few minutes, but it’s clear he doesn’t care, sneaking around is probably his favorite past time (jeno knows much more than he wishes to).

“shit, much colder than i thought it would be” jaemin mutters, again avoiding eye contact with you as you give a small chuckle. “jisung would complain”.

“why do you sound annoyed? you’re the one who programmed that!”

“i didn’t! he just naturally does that! he’s like a child..”

you push at jaemin’s shoulder, yelping as you watch him stumble. donghyuck snorts, pointing at the sight with pure amusement. “please don’t die, you know doyoung would be pissed” jeno whispers, jaemin stays glaring (but can it even be called a glare with the love behind his eyes?)

renjun keeps his hands settled in his lap as he stares upward. “really? only because doyoung would be pissed?”

“you know he doesn’t want any bad associated with the lab’s name”.

“if only he knew” donghyuck clicks his tongue, tilting his head as he rubs his eyes.

jeno’s squint, and his lips take an upturn. he can just barely make out the shape of a water bearer in the sky, someone pouring water out of a jug. huh, aquarius really is pretty.

the shine from the stars reflects in your widened pupils. you blink, then you snicker at something unsaid. “think jisung would like this one..”

jeno’s eyebrows furrow, yet he keeps his face still, still enough that you won’t pick up on the falter of his expression. you hum once again, swinging your legs back and forth.

“i miss him”.

it’s an admittedly strange claim. everybody knows already, the honesty shouldn’t be a surprising factor. there’s less of a tremble in your tone and more of a simple scratch, a rasp in your voice which can be attributed to your days spent staring at a control screen with no reply.

jeno leans against you, letting the warmth encapsulate him as he watches you smile peripherally. jaemin merely sighs, clearly sharing such emotions.

jeno’s smile grows when you nudge him, pointing upward at a shooting star.

“pretty huh?”

jeno doesn’t respond, not exactly focused on the stars, just you.

[katz-chow]

always there

synopsis: johnny takes care of you after you donated blood 🏷| gn!reader, blood donation, ambiguous relationship, fainting, cheesy

a/n: donated blood and didn’t feel good right after. father figure to the rescue right after and now i’m just trudging on thru the trenches. this one's short, sorry. but it's still prompt 11! @glitterypirateduck

during college, you made it a routine to give blood consistently. either whole blood, platelets, or plasma, you also found yourself the victim of many pin pricks, much like a sewing holder.

this time around was no different. except you had forgotten all about the appointment and hadn’t noticed until that morning.

breakfast was forgotten about as you continued to drive to the store, preparing for the next week. until a text notification pinged on your phone, mounted on the car dash.

your eyes widen as you got to the store with more urgency, determined to finish shopping before the appointment time came. it ended great as you hurried home, checking your phone periodically to see if any of your friends are available to drive you home from the blood bank.

to no avail, you frown but got ready to go anyway. you filled your cold water bottle and left the house, driving silently to the medical center.

as soon as you got in, everything went fine. you hardly looked at your phone and instead had watched the screen playing some action movie. over to your right arm , the tubing was dark and crimson with blood at as it filled the blood pouch rocking back and forth.

the phlebotomist came and checked your arm, blood flowing slowly and thick from your lack of fluid and food in your system. you sighed as you felt the blood escape from you, instantaneously tired and woozy.

“clever body, how fascinating…” you say to yourself as the machine next to you beep uncontrollably. lifting your head up to look at it, you felt your body freeze over like ice and your eyes rolled back.

next thing you know, you’re laying limp on the chair as the phlebotomists crowd around you, checking vitals, calling your name, and icing you down.

you respond weakly and gave a thumbs up. your heart thundered in your ears as you feel the large gauge needle being pulled out of your arm and bandages being wrapped around. however, you blinked a few times, feeling for sure that your eyes were indeed open, you started to panic as your vision fly away from you.

“hey, hey it’s okay. your eyes are still rolled back, it’s okay.” one voice rang out, breathless and on your right.

another voice rang out on your left side and you turned your head over to her as cold sweats fell from your body. “is there someone we can call?”

you nodded and slowly reached for your phone in your lap, pulling it out and handing it to the empty space in front of you as you laid limp against the reclined chair. “john mactavish…”

your breathing felt heavy and labored as they continued to cool you down. your eyelids were closed now and your movements slow, trying to prevent another fainting spell.

light entered through your eyelids and you slowly opened your eyes, your stomach growling in hunger. the phlebotomists look at you, judgmentally, side glances at you.

you groan and look at the clock to the side, embarassed by how loud your stomach is and how the fake-nice healthcare workers treat you with. you were treading on their lunch hour, which is why you were treated as such.

there’s a certain different type of weighting shame that comes with giving blood and the aftermath. how weak you feel, how ill prepared you are, and the fact that it seems like no one wants you here at all. well one person does, as a kind older woman drops off a sympathetic bag of chips.

you give her a weak smile, not much you can do other than just sit there and just try and get better. at some point you don’t even remember why you're still sitting there, legs up and an instant ice pack placed on your forehead.

"there you are hen, got your call." a familiar voice calls out to you as you tilt your head up just a bit, following the sound of the voice. a handsome scotsman faces you with a weak smile. almost instantly, a boost of energy rushes through you and you sit up quickly and push yourself to the edge of the chair.

"hi, johnny...i'm sorry you have to be here." you mumbled to him as you let him wrap an arm over you and help you up.

"can you walk?" he asks gently, grabbing your purse and nodding a curt goodbye to the workers there as he guides you out and into his car.

you, feeling quite a little a lot of a loser, shook him off and proceeded to walk out and towards your car, "i can take myself home, johnny. it's okay, i can drive..."

johnny, taking none of your nonsense, proceeded to catch up to you, like it was hard, and blocked you from your path. you looked up at him, and grumbled something while pushing him gently away. "i don't want to bother you anymore than i need to."

he frowned at this silly statement you put out as you continue to push on his chest. he chuckled a bit at your weak attempts, clearly not feeling well as the sun makes your face scrunch up and your punches are not as hard as he knows they can be. "i'll take care of you, okay? we'll get food on the way and you can stay at my place."

he looked at you and brushed your hair away from your forehead. "don't fight it. i'm right here"

indeed you were when you're sitting on his counter top, watching as he makes you dinner. the music blared through his speaker as you scroll through your phone, searching for a movie to watch.

suddenly, bored of your search, you looked up and saw his backside. how the cotton of his tshirt stretched over his muscles so nicely, how with every movement, you saw his muscles contract and pull, beckoning you to come closer.

he felt you staring and he turned his head back from the stove just a bit, catching your glance with a wink. you huffed out a shy laugh and continued to scroll through your phone.

you see his turn to you, thinking he needed to get something next to you. instead, you see his get closer to you and cage you in with his arms against the counter top next to you. you peak up from behind your phone and look at him, a grin on his face. "stop looking at me."

"i'm not..." you replied, hiding your face behind your phone.

he laughed and leaned closer to you, both his palms held your cheeks now, opting to squeeze and feel how soft they were. "don't lie, to me bonnie."

you blushed, not knowing what to say. you put down your phone next to you, your hands running along his forearms and then resting them upon the back of his, still on your cheeks. "thanks for being there for me."

he chuckled at you and kissed your forehead gently, yet a bit longer than anyone would, savoring it. "i told you, i'll always be there for ya."

master list | letter box | main directory

drop by the letter box!

[sitp-recs]

Masterlist Drarry Recs - Pt 3

• Angst with a happy ending

• Angsty secret relationship

• Angsty first time

• Addiction themes

• Ace Drarry

• AU

• Bartender AU/Pub fics

• Birthdays

• Break up make up (epilogue compliant)

• Break up make up + arranged marriage

• Forced marriage

• Divorced Drarry getting back together

• Bucolic fics

• Chef AUs

• Dark Draco

• Death Eater trials

• Draco on probation

• Disasters

• Drarry + gossip

• Drarry + mythology

• Drarry coming out as a couple

• Draco is open about his feelings | Hopelessly in love (Draco)

• Oblivious Draco | Self-sabotaging Draco

• Draco takes care of Harry | Harry takes care of Draco

• Dark Academia

• Fics with horror elements

• Esoterics and astrology

• Established relationship with spoiled Draco

• Epilogue-compliant

• Friends to lovers slow burn + redemption arc

• Idiots to lovers

• Harry-centric fics | Different takes on Harry

• Jaded Harry & morally ambiguous Draco

• Odd jobs | Militant Harry | Powerful Harry

• Harry falls in love first | Draco as Harry’s bisexual awakening

• Harry lives in Godric’s Hollow

• Hospitals (setting)

• Hurt/Comfort

• Holiday fics: Christmas | NYE

• Horcrux hunting

• Harry betrays Draco | Draco hurts Harry

• Harry breaks up with Ginny

• Jealous Harry 1 & 2 | Early jealousy

• Homophobia

• Infidelity 1 & 2

• Intense UST

• Intimacy issues

• Melancholy love

• Memory loss

• My favorite romantic fics

• Meet-cute

• Organic and routine sex

• Kink discovery

• Pansy & Blaise as side characters

• POV Outsider

• Physical hurt/comfort | Injured Harry

• PTSD & sex as coping mechanism

• Post-war loneliness

• Power imbalance

• Professors (both)

• Queer themes

• Rainy romance

• Reality show AU | Romcom AU | Sci-fi AU | Cowboy AU | Heist AU

• Religious imagery and symbolism

• Sex, drugs and rock ’n’ roll | Sex Magic

• Seer Draco | Seer Harry

• Surviving together

• Soft 8th year | Field trips | 8th year Draco pov

• Sports AU

• Soothing reads

• Step dad Harry

• Successful Draco comes back to Britain

• Toxic family dynamics

• Voldemort Wins AU | War fics

• G and T long fics | Draco-centric

• Plot-oriented M and E fics

• Short fics under 5k

[heaven-s-black-box]

Do it Better- Dainsleif x fem!Reader

Return to File

Recovery date: December 21st, 2023

Description: Sometimes someone else does it better.

Includes- No plot, ambiguous relationship, masturbation, a dildo, fingering, eating out, slight voyeurism, overstimulation, creampie

Notes: Thank you to my friend who beta read this.

Word count: 1 370

Back to directory

Y/n whines, arching her back off the bed, as she screws her eyes shut. Coordination is hard when you’re on the verge of cumming, especially when you’re sensitive. The closer she gets the harder it is to keep pumping the dildo in and out of her dripping cunt, even worse as her grip keeps slipping, and rubbing her clit at the same time. Her arms burn with exhaustion and her breathing quickens as she tries to keep going.

Just a little more. Just a little-

Her thighs press together as she rocks her hips forward into her hand as the rest of her body refuses to move. She takes in deep, shuddered breaths, as she’s left woefully unsatisfied once more.

She lets out a frustrated groan, whining as she removes the dildo and it brushes against her sensitive clit.

If only her stupid… whatever he was, was here this wouldn’t be a problem. Dain had no problem holding her down and fucking her into overstimulation, in fact, he loved it. But he was off archons know where, and she was left with puny toys and her own personal limitations.

Neither she nor Dain particularly care for the archons, but as a gentle breeze ruffles the curtains over her open window she can only hope that it will carry her wish and bring him back.

Y/n is just about to start cleaning herself up, when a shadow appears behind her curtains. It sits there for a moment, watching her, and she lets out a shaky breath as she runs her fingers over her clit. The short break let some of the sensitivity wear off, but her legs still twitched as she ran slow circles over the nerves.

A soft chuckle carried in from behind the curtains as she dipped a finger into her cunt.

“Fuck you,” she sighed.

She bent one leg, the one further from the window, and added a second finger and began slowly pumping them in and out. They weren’t reaching deep enough like this, and so she pulled them out and went back to running slow circles over her clit.

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?” Dain said as he climbed into the room. “You look upset, how, unlike you.”

“Can’t… can’t cum right,” she gasped, circling her fingers faster and arching off the bed once more.

“You seem to be doi-”

Her hand suddenly stopped moving as she rolled over onto her side and squeezed her thighs together as she looked up at him with teary eyes.

“Please… want it to hurt.”

Dain sighed as he unclipped his cloak and threw it over a nearby chair with his gloves before crawling over top of Y/n. He gently nudged her thighs open and brought her hand to his lips where he licked it clean– tongue pressed flat as it dragged from wrist to the tips of her fingers.

“So picky.” He carefully rolled her onto her back and settled between her legs. “And needy.” Once he was settled, he began to lick her inner thighs clean, earning himself a content sigh. “Can’t make yourself cum right, need me to break you… maybe I should spank you.”

Y/n laced her fingers into his hair and gave a sharp yank, making him look up at her.

“I know,” he laughed. “I was just kidding.”

At that, Y/n loosened her hold on his hair so that he could bury his face into her cunt. She moaned softly, clawing at Dain’s scalp for some way to ground herself as her heels dug into the bed and she tried to squirm away. The gentle pressure and flicks as he cleaned up her mess from earlier quickly became too much and she began to trip over her words as she warned him that she was about to cum.

On any other day it would be a toss up on whether he would pull away or go down on her harder, but not today. Today, he tightened his grip on her hips to pull her closer and began to gently suck on her clit. Her words became decreasingly coherent as she scrambled to push his head away on instinct, but unlike when she was pleasuring herself– she couldn’t make him stop.

The knot in her abdomen snapped, and her head fell back as her mouth opened in a choked cry and her eyes rolled back. Her grip in Dain’s hair tightened to the point her knuckles turned white and her nails dug into her palms, making him groan as he continued running his tongue through her folds.

They took a moment to catch their breaths, and then Dain carefully began to lick up the new mess. Y/n’s legs twitched everytime his tongue brushed her clit.

“Want you to fill me up,” Y/n mumbled as Dain pushed back onto his knees and pulled his vest and shirt off.

With heavy arms, Y/n slowly reached out and grazed her fingers against the corruption on his skin. He sat there for a moment, watching her eyelids droop as the exhaustion from three orgasms began to hit her.

“Are you sure you can stay awake for that?”

“Ya… I mean you won’t be here tomorrow to help me.” She pushed herself up onto her elbows and slid her hand up his chest to cup his jaw. “Let me enjoy this.”

“Suit yourself,” he whispered, then leaned in to kiss her.

Awkwardly, the two finished stripping Dain of his clothes as they made out and Dain worked her open with his fingers. Dain’s fingers left sticky prints on her skin as he gripped her hips to line himself up once he was bare.

He ran his fingers through her folds one last time, running tight circles over her clit and laughed as her legs twitched and more slick gushed out, so that he could lube himself up. Y/n let out a frustrated whine.

“What do we say?” He teased, rubbing his tip against her clit and letting it barely slip into her hole.

Digging her feet further into the mattress, Y/n pulled herself up and grabbed Dain by the back of his neck so he would fall back with her. His jaw went slack and his eyes widened in shock as he was pulled off balance, barely reacting in time to stop himself from crushing her.

“Fuck me until I pass out.”

“You certainly have a way with words,” he grinned before pushing in with no other warning.

Y/n gasped, and the hand on Dain’s neck dug into his skin. Her other arm wrapped around his back as well when he began thrusting into her at a rapid pace, far faster than she could ever manage and far deeper than she could reach. Red lines streaked across Dain’s back as Y/n clawed away at it.

“Not- enough,” she gasped as she tried to grind her hips up against his pelvis.

“Look at you,” he cooed, sliding a hand between them as the other pressed her hips into the bed. He began running slow circles against her clit, keeping her on edge as he tried to find her g-spot. “So on edge you can’t do anything but sit here and take my dick.”

“Ah!” Y/n yelped suddenly, thighs clamping around his hips. “There! Too much, too much!”

“Want me to stop?” He chuckled, sitting up onto his knees and hissing as Y/n’s nails scratched against his back.

“Don-Ah!”

Dain began to rub at her clit faster, cutting her off and causing her to arch back off the bed as all of her muscles tensed.

Once again, her eyes rolled back. She shuddered, squirting and clamping down on Dain’s dick as he continued to fuck her through her orgasm. Choked sounds left Y/n’s lips as they slowly devolved into pathetic whimpers and she tried again to move away from him. But with a strong hold, he buried himself as deep as he could and came, letting his forehead drop against hers.

“Was that enough for you,” he panted, before lifting his head up and opening his eyes only to find Y/n already fast asleep. “Everytime…”

[sophaeros]

The Strokes for Rockin'On, December 2005 - English Translated Interview

THE STROKES The first report on the completion of The Strokes' tough and hard-hitting new album, "First Impressions of Earth"!

The guitar, the groove, the shouts, all turn into a hot, heavy blast that burns your ears. The Strokes' long-awaited third album, First Impressions of Earth, is a literal masterpiece that will make you tremble with the shock of the five of them being on fire and the solid response that resonates in your gut. Please listen to the prologue single "Juicebox" from the album that will be released soon. It takes only 35 seconds for the twin guitars to erupt ferociously from the cracks of the earth-soaked bass line and the sturdy rhythm to the gushing chorus. It's an energetic rock 'n' roll tune similar to their previous work "Reptilia," but the hasty development that skips the introduction and dashes straight to the heart of the song is shocking. The explosive speed and condensation of the work show that they have carved out their own music more directly with this work.

The seven songs from the album that arrived brought further surprises and excitement. The arpeggios, armed with the beauty of hard rock style, flowed torrents, and the four-wheel drive beats pounded out at full throttle. Just listening to the hard-hitting sound was incredibly exciting, and the catharsis of the sounds harmonizing closely together and climbing the melody's ups and downs was straightforward and cool. Julian's vocals, which are basically rough and awake, were exposed for the first time in a clear mix, and it was refreshing to hear him respond to the emotions of the songs with his passionate singing and ad-libs that made his voice crack. The popness of "Someday" and "12:51" and the breathtaking twin guitar interplay were not lost. But it was just easier to understand. A completely new dynamics and realism of sound was now flowing through their bodies.

"First Impressions" took nearly a year to produce at the band's own studio in New York. After initial sessions with Gordon Raphael, who worked on the previous two albums, the producer's baton was finally handed to David Kahn. His participation was quite surprising, as his representative works include works by Sugar Ray and Paul McCartney, but this selection was a wise decision. His ears and experience working with many mainstream acts have helped him to fundamentally refine the distorted soundscape of the Strokes, who are mocked as "the most popular indie band in the world" (it goes without saying that their fan base is indie-alternative oriented, even though they are signed to a major label), and successfully translate it into a more universal "today's rock" discourse.

"Is This It," with its demo-tape-like sound full of blank spaces, heralded the arrival of a new band with such outstanding musical sense that it could have been documented just by watching them play. With their second album, "Room on Fire," they expanded their tentacles into a variety of pop styles, but the aesthetic of the first album, which was easy to miss, remained fundamentally unchanged, with an approach that emphasizes sense and does not reveal everything, leaving the listener to fill in the gaps and spaces between the lines. At first glance, entrusting the work to the listener, saying "You can understand without me having to tell you everything, right?" is a smart and stylish way of doing things. However, there is a danger that it is perceived as a reliance on the listener, and that it is "avoiding a direct confrontation with the listener." Listening to this album, which eliminates ambiguity and suggestiveness as much as possible and where every sound functions with a clear intention, you can feel that they have finally become aware of this point and are trying to make a major breakthrough. With this album, we may be meeting the real Strokes for the first time. (Mariko Sakamoto)

JULIAN CASABLANCAS & NICOLAI FRAITURE INTERVIEW

I think they’ve captured that sound that's going to knock the doors down and take the band to the next level.

Interview: Mariko Sakamoto Photography: Autumn de Wilde

I'm happy with "Room." The reason we changed the production this time wasn't because of a drop in sales or dissatisfaction with the previous film, but because we wanted to try a new direction (Nikolai)

● It's been a while. How have you been? Nikolai (hereafter N): Yeah. I'm doing great. ● I'm glad that it seems like you’re enjoying the interview this time. Julian (J): (strained laugh) N: Yeah, I'm really enjoying it. (smiles)

● I have the impression that the Strokes aren't very good at interviews, but this time, unlike with their previous album, you seem to be quite proactive in speaking. N: …I wonder if that's what it's going to be like? J: Maybe.

● I think that's because the new album is so amazing that I want to talk about it. I've listened to eight songs, and they're all great! N: Thank goodness. J: Really? Thank you very much. ● Yes. I thought they were really good songs, and I felt like the next album will open new doors for the band and take The Strokes to the next level. N: Wow... (surprised) J: Thank you very much. I'm glad to hear that... Well, I hope it turns out exactly as you say (wry laugh) ● It's absolutely accurate. Please trust your intuition. J: Okay, okay, I believe you (laughs). Thank you.

● At the same time, the new album is full of surprises. There's a considerable change in musical style, and in many ways it's become more masculine: the sound, the arrangements, and the vocal mix. J: (widening his eyes and half bursting out laughing) Ahhhhhhh! ● No, it's not "manly". However, for example, some of the songs have been arranged in a spectacular way, and even feature flashy guitar solos on par with those of metal bands. I think all the elements have been trained and fleshed out more than ever before, and when I listened to it, I felt a sense of accomplishment that said "This is it!" This is a very powerful album. N: I guess so. Thank you. J: ... (a little taken aback by her momentum) That’s good. Hahaha. ● —That's it? (laughs) J: (laughs) No, I just feel like I'm being praised to the max. It’s like once you curry favour with me and get my guard down, you’re going to bite me! Jump down my throat like that, no? (laughs wryly) ●  (laughs) It’s not like that. J: Hahaha, kidding, kidding!

● So, first I want to ask you about the changes in this album. Perhaps the most positive aspect of the new album is that, unlike the previous one, you were able to take your time and work on the production after building your own studio. What do you think about this? N: Hmm... I think the biggest role in this album was played by producer David Kahn. So, speaking of our album, I think we got along really well with him. Of course, building our own studio was very important, and it was just as important as David's presence. That way we were able to take our time and work in our own space. But David is a really skilled producer who knows exactly what he has to do, and he's the perfect person to make a thicker,... how should I put it, yes, bigger sound. At the same time, using our own studio meant we were able to work comfortably and without hesitation, and thanks to that I think we were able to keep our own style and the style of this band. David brought out that style of us and pulled it up a little higher. J: Yes, I think you're right. And one more thing... well, in terms of musical style, I don't think we changed that much with this album. We just tried to keep changing and evolving. But, as Nikolai just said, the various factors in the production of this album, like having plenty of time, I think those factors helped us to grasp this sound. It's like what you said earlier, the sound that breaks down the door and takes the band to the next level. So… well, I think people will be able to understand what we’re doing and respect it… so that they’ll be able to more accurately interpret what it is we’re doing. Of course, we've always done that, but there are a lot of people who don't see beyond the sound... so I think this time it's a little easier to get into. That being said, we didn't intentionally try to change our style in order to achieve a certain sound or anything like that. I think it's the result of us trying to build on the foundation we've built up until now. As for the performance, it was a natural growth as a result of hard work, but I think the biggest factor in us being able to reach the next stage was the change in the acoustics.

● So you weren't changing direction because you weren't satisfied with your previous album, Room on Fire? I really love that album, but the reality is — and this is only in comparison to your first album — the reaction was lukewarm, and it didn't generate the same excitement as your first album, and sales actually fell. N: Hmm…

● Have you ever reflected on what went wrong with that piece and thought about trying to do it differently this time? J: (takes a deep breath)...Well, it's not like we all thought about it too much. More than that...well, I think we just wanted to keep an open mind about everything. What I understood about the previous album was that it was an album that was made in a hurry, at least that's what I think. So, this album is different, and I think it was more about us doing what we know we can do and proving to our listeners what we can do. At the same time, it was also a kind of self-reporting. It was about proving our abilities to ourselves. We definitely wanted to reach the next level, and this time we simply had the time to do it. So, we didn't think, 'Let's change things' from the beginning of the recording. We started by trying things out with Gordon (Raphael, producer of the past two albums), and both David and Gordon were involved. In other words, we didn't start making it thinking, 'The sales of the last album fell, so this time we have to do it this way.’ N: Yes. We never even discussed the fact that sales of "Room" were not good or anything like that. Besides, I think it was a very successful album— J: Right. N: I'm satisfied with the outcome of that work. So the reason we changed production companies this time wasn't because sales had dropped or because we were dissatisfied with the previous work, but because we wanted to aim for a new direction for ourselves and try something we'd never done before. J: —But we understand that other people think that the reason for the change this time is because of that... But I wonder, if we had recorded this album in exactly the same way as the first and second albums, what would have happened? I think everyone would have said, 'It's the same as before!' But even if the songs were exactly the same, and even the melodies were exactly the same, I think that the reaction to the sound this time, where we changed the way we did it, would probably be, 'It's a really cool song, and the arrangement is cool.' It's interesting that the reaction changes like that even though the content is the same... It's not particularly important, but it's interesting. Of course, I think it's good that we changed this time, and I know that this album wouldn't have been well received if we had done it the same way as before.

It was a recording where we were fighting back against an overbearing, visionary producer (Julian)

● About David Kahn, the Strokes are a close-knit, ambitious, and high-maintenance band. It seems like it would be difficult for an "outsider" like him, who had never worked with the Strokes before, to get involved, but what was the difference between him and Gordon Raphael? N: Yes...Gordon and David are completely different types. Gordon is better at capturing the atmosphere and feeling. So he sets up the microphones here and there to pick up the sound, presses the record button and keeps the tape running, and we don't do much with what we record. In that sense, David Kahn is completely different. I think he is very precise and detailed about the sound. So, in terms of "recording music", in other words, in terms of recording technique, his way of doing things is at a more intense level than Gordon's. And also, he had a much clearer, much clearer vision of what he wanted to get out of the band. Well, that made the recording process difficult at times. His way of seeing things was different from our own, and we sometimes clashed. So, I guess you could say that this album was about... well, you could say it was about finding the right balance between what David thought was 'this is it' and what we thought was 'no, this is what we want'. He definitely had an intimidating side, too… J: We were resisting David. That’s exactly what the recording was like. N: Julian was the one who worked closely with David. I'm sure he has something to say. (He then turns to Julian.) J: Hmm, well, I think what you just said describes our relationship with him quite accurately (laughs wryly). Well, that's why we've relied on everyone we've worked with, even if they were outside the band... But even though we trust them, if we let them do what they want, it ends up being a little different from what we want. I don't want that part to be taken over by the producer. That's because we want to keep it for ourselves. So, there were times where David was too focused on making the album in line with his own way of listening to music. Well, it's not like he himself said, "Let's do this to make it more pop," but the way he listens to music is, how should I put it, pop, accessible, easy to listen to, that's the standard. So sometimes he would change the tone, which was a bit of a hassle for me (laughs). But, yeah, his recording technique was great, and although it was difficult, I think in the end we were able to find a happy medium.

● Did you write all the songs this time too? J: ...Well, in most cases I brought in an idea and we all developed it together, but yes, there are more collaborations on this album compared to the previous one. I think with this album we have made a big step forward in the direction of functioning more efficiently and quickly as a band. When someone brings in an idea, we all improve it into something good (snap!) That's right, so I guess you could say we have become a more efficient, faster-working machine (laughs).

● So this album was made as a collaborative effort by everyone. It seems like the recording and writing sessions were a completely different experience than ever before. N: Yes. Of all the works we've done so far, this is the one where we worked the hardest together. J ...But I don't think it's fair to compare the previous two albums because we didn't have as much time to work on them. When I brought a song idea to the studio, I had to start working on it right away, try different ways one after another, and finish the song quickly. That's not a very relaxing production environment. This time, even if a song didn't take shape smoothly, I just put it aside and worked on another song. I didn't push the work forward, and well, at least I don't think there was any forcing something that didn't work out with this record.

● What is your own opinion of this work at this point? N: Hmm. It's a little too early to answer that question, since it's just been completed, but... if you ask me if I like this album, my answer is yes. J: Heh heh. N: (To Julian) But don't you think so? J: That's a very honest opinion, especially since it's not something you say after the album has been released and everyone has listened to it. N: (looks a little confused) I see... Well, I don't know what everyone thinks, but I like this album. So the answer is yes! ● (Laughs) Julian, how about you? J: It’s a yes for me too. I like it (laughs). And now I can do live shows again, so I'm really excited. I'm really looking forward to doing live shows.

Where does this album come from? The answer is complicated and not immediately clear to us. We can't point to "this and that" (Julian)

● So, according to an interview — or rather, a cover story in the NME newspaper — J: Ah (bitter smile). NME. Seriously... it's all the time. That was the first interview I had for this album, and because of that, every interview I've had since has always brought up the NME article (laugh). I can't help but think that all the journalists around the world will be writing articles based on that NME article. ● My apologies. I really am sorry, but what I found interesting about the NME article was that you mentioned bands with hard-core sounds like Muse, System of a Down, Queen, and The The. J: (wry smile) I think Nick’s the one who mentioned System and Muse though? ● Yes. However, I had never previously associated these bands with the Strokes, so that was quite a surprise to me. J: I’ve never connected them either. ● (laughs) So, when you were making the album you listened to a lot of their work and were influenced by them or something like that? J: So... after we finished making this record, I listened to Queen's albums a lot, but the recording work was finished (laughs). People ask me, "What kind of works were you listening to?" but I don't know either... I don't think that kind of thing influences the songs I write, and when I write songs, I think everything I've listened to up until now unconsciously seeps into the song. So... the names of the bands that appear in that article are an answer to what kind of music we were listening to at that time. But if you ask, "Where did this album come from directly?" the answer is not so simple and clear, it's a bit more complicated. If we were asked to give an answer, we would have to sit down together and analyze it in detail. It's not something that can be simply pointed out as "this, this, and this." ● I see. But it's true that the sound of this album is more hard rock/metal-like and intense than ever before, and some of the guitar solos are as fast as Eddie Van Halen's. So I thought, "I see." N: (laughs) J: That solo was just... I wanted to make it a little crazy, so that's one of the things I did. For Albert, playing a crazy guitar solo like that is just fun. But as far as the sound goes, I think I sometimes have a Nirvana-like feel to it... Or rather, I'm aiming for Nirvana. Well, I don't know. Well, I've listened to so much music, and I don't know where to start talking about it... Maybe it's just a little bit of music that I like that appears in the song, or the style of other works that appears... (thinks for a while) Sorry, sorry, I'm starting to talk about random things.

● Has the album title already been decided as "First Impressions of Earth"? Or is it still under consideration? J: Hmm... No, I think that's pretty much it. The title is pretty self-explanatory... It's a literal title. When this album was nearing completion, how should I put it, I was thinking about various things and writing down what came to my mind on paper. While doing so, that phrase came out, and when I saw it, I thought "That's cool". And that phrase matched perfectly with what I felt when I looked at the list of songs I wrote for this album... So, yes, it really is exactly like that, "First Impression of the Earth". It's an objective list of thoughts and comments on universal things, the song list of this album looked like that. As I was looking at the song titles lined up, I thought that if I were to name this list, that word would be it.

● Is that so? This strange album title made me think of a person standing a little distance away from the world, watching it. I felt like it meant that you have a feeling of being somewhat isolated from what is happening in the world, or from what you experience every day. J: Hmm... the feeling of alienation… ● For example, in the song "Ask Me Anything" on the album, you sing, "I have nothing to say / Nothing to give / No reason to live." J: Hahaha (bursts out laughing) ● I don't take the heavy lyrics "There's no reason to live" literally. However, I wondered if you’ve always felt this kind of distance and resignation. J: Hmm...I think that feeling of alienation can also be included in the list of 'comments on universal things'. (laughs) In other words, it's not particularly the central theme of the album. And personally, I don't feel particularly alienated. Well, I think that everyone feels that kind of alienation when they are younger...when they become conscious of things. At about 14 or 13 years old, when they are forced to realize that they are just a monotonous and mechanical part of the system. But for me...the song "Ask Me Anything" isn't about saying "I have nothing to say". Rather, it's about how it's sometimes difficult to express what you want to express with a proper purpose. I try to do it, but sometimes I feel like it didn't work out, I failed... (laughs)

● But musicians have to express themselves through music, and there are cases where they are asked to speak on behalf of many people on larger social issues. Even so, do you admit your powerlessness and say, "I have nothing to say"? J: Hmm... (takes a deep breath) It's a complicated issue, and a delicate and tricky one. I... so I think that we shouldn't worry too much about things that are out of our control. That's one of my thoughts. Because sometimes I feel like I can't control anything, and I feel like I'm not even in charge of my own life (laughs). On the other hand, I also feel that I have a duty... so I try to make things positive in the best way I can. I think sometimes I think I have to have a positive influence. So, yeah, that's the hard part, the tricky part, the complicated part, because it's really hard to have a positive influence. So I think that leaving things a little bit ambiguous when you're trying to do something helps you to try to figure out what it is that actually connects everything together. And also... sometimes I feel like I'm kind of stupid when I explain my thoughts and opinions in detail (laughs).

● Some people criticize the Strokes for being ambiguous and saying that they are "a band that has nothing to say," and it's certainly true that you are not a band with a strong message. J: …Like Rage Against the Machine? ● Yes. You're a band that throws your opinions at the listeners, and I think a lot of people want that from a rock band, to have a strong attitude that draws people's attention and makes them listen. This album, at least in terms of sound, is a powerful sound that makes you want to listen whether you like it or not. Do you think that the Strokes are now more open and aggressive, and ready to face a bigger audience? J: Well... I think we're definitely getting closer to that level. I don't know. But I feel like this album will be a good stepping stone to the direction we're heading in. This is just my personal opinion, and maybe it's not something I should say here. Also, we're still working on the new material (※The recording itself was completed, but the jacket and other final work was still left), and at times like that... I don't really want to talk about this kind of thing. You know, we're like, we've finally put one foot in the gap of a slightly opened door, and we're trying hard not to close it again. But I hope this record will help us open that door. And then I want to move forward from there.

"We could make something good," we had the conviction. But we also had the raw fear that people would say, "The Strokes are over." (Julian)

● Also, what I felt strongly after listening to the eight songs was that you guys have finally let your guard down and created an album without worrying about what others think is cool or what is considered uncool. J&N: (wry laugh)

● So, I think this is going to be a great album, but do you think it bridges the gap between who you really are and what the public thinks the Strokes are? J: Yes. I hope so. Most of those images are exaggerated and exaggerated rumors. So... I hope that with each work, at each stage, we can get closer to our true selves, and to do that, we have to try different methods. So I hope that this album will be received as an album that helps people understand us a little better after listening to it.

●What about you, Nikolai? Do you ever feel a gap between how you are and how the Strokes are perceived? N: Hmm... I wouldn't call it a gap, but what I think is that there are a lot of people who judge us too easily. I think that's where the gap lies. ● Oh, I see. N: For example, it's really hard to deal with people who, just by looking at our photos, immediately assume that we're a "this kind of band" or "that kind of people," and don't even bother to listen to our music. Even if those kinds of people do listen to our music, they only give it a quick listen and immediately form a judgement about the work. On the other hand, there are also people who are more open-minded and listen to music with a broad sensibility that welcomes new things, and I think those people will enjoy what we put out.

● In the end, you plan to include a total of 14 songs, right? J&N: (nods) ● There are still six more songs. What are they like? Are they a different type of song from the eight we've listened to this time? J: I think the songs you haven't listened to yet are "The Other Side," "Killing Lies," and "Fear of Sleep." I'm not sure which ones you haven't listened to yet. Can I see the track list? (Looking at the notebook with Nikolai). Um... Oh, there's a note saying "Blondie-like"! (wry smile) ● (sheepishly) Sorry. J: (laughs) That's right, oh, "Red Lights" is missing. What else is there? N: "Evening Sun." J: Ah, that's right. So that's six songs. The ones I haven't played yet are... how can I put it... more spooky. ● What, it's even more "eerie"?! J: No, I don't think it's exactly the same as "eerie"... I just want to say that it's stranger than the 8 songs I've shown you guys, in terms of the vibe of the song, on a technical level. I haven't really done songs that develop like that before, starting slow and then getting hard. Also, "Red Lights" is a two-guitar song... a Flock of Seagulls-esque self-absorbed guitar solo, performed with two electric guitars (laughs). But, yeah, I think the 8 songs you've heard are champion-level songs. That doesn't mean you'll only like the 8 songs you've heard. The other 6 songs are cool and deep, even if they're not straightforward. Well, it's hard to describe what they're like in words... but I hope you'll like the rest of them too. That's because we're a little scared too. What if the whole album gets leaked on the Internet before we release it? (The first single, "Juicebox," was leaked on the Internet before it was released). So, right now, we can't let you listen to all the songs. Sorry.

●Yes, I understand that situation. Also, I feel like there are more dark and serious songs this time around compared to the previous two albums. Why is that? J: Hmm...? What do you think about that? Other people have told me it's a positive album. ● Yes, it's a powerful work, so in that sense I think it's a positive record. J: It's funny. Other people say (with a smile) 'This one sounds happy!', but then you say (with a frown) 'It's a dark piece...' (with a wry smile). I wonder which it is.

● (laughs) I think "Room on Fire" is a very energetic and excellent pop album, a work that challenges various pop styles in one album, but in comparison, this album seems serious and dark. Why is that? N: Hmm, that's... (says with a pompous expression) J: Hmm, is that so? I don't think it's a particularly gloomy or dark album. Maybe it's a little more serious than before... But I think there's still a sense of teasing people this time. Right? I don't think we'll become a completely serious band... Well, we'll have to wait until the next album to know. I like putting playfulness and jokes in music like that, but if we're literally "playing around", it doesn't work for the listeners. It's not funny at all. At least, I think that's the case with music.

● It took almost a year to complete this album, but looking back on that long recording process, what do you think the atmosphere was like during the sessions? J: It was a cycle of ups and downs. ... How should I put it, we were kind of drifting apart from each other... (long silence) Umm, it was... I wonder? Sorry, I can't answer that question (vague).

●It seems like it wasn't smooth sailing, but do you think that was because you felt a lot of pressure to make a definitive album and break through to a new level? N: Of course (simply) ● Hahaha, that's right. J: (laughs) What I felt was... we were all aware of the pressure, and we were anxious. We all had a strong belief that we could make something good. However, in the back of our minds, or maybe just out of the blue... well, it was just something we felt for just a moment, and I don't know why it came up, but somewhere in our hearts, we were thinking, "This is the end of The Strokes. It's obviously no good" (laughs). We had to make sure we didn't make that kind of album. So we had a raw and real fear. But we absolutely didn't want to make that kind of album.

[keplerspacecraftofficial]

you have no clue how deep the music made by the wretched australian shmuck has imbedded itself in my brain. anyways id bet my right arm act 2 is comin out tmrw and its gonna be a cover of rock n roll nerd by tim minchin. also

ambiguous prophecy complete