#The Wide Game book online

[sturnsdarling]

'Chris likes girls who don't like him back'

Late night streaming with your best friends turns to a conversation about the boys' type, and Chris gets called out

vibe check: flirty fluffy fun, 3/4 of my favourite f words

1.4k words

A/N: i had this idea literally straight away after what Matt said about Chris' type.........the idea of being Chris' best friend that he openly fancies but you're 'not interested' makes MY TOES CURL BRO LIKE ARE YOU KIDDING anyway I hope you love this. PART TWO IS INCOMING…

love and cigs, merc

"Matt he's right there what the fuck are you doing?!" you scream down the mic, nearly throwing your controller across the room as you jolt back in your chair.

You watch as Matt gets sniped in the head from the back, laughing as he wails on this desk, making the whole stream glitch and nearly crash. Chris is laughing along with you, trying not to make it obvious that he's watching you, and not Matt.

"Matt, bro you need to fuckin' up your game, y/n/n is actually carrying us right now." Chris says as Matt picks his chair up off the floor and sits back down in a huff.

"I always carry when I come on with you boys" you smirk, looking at the tiny square of Chris on your screen.

"yeah because you're a little sweat" Matt chuckles.

The boys had been streaming everyday for over a week now and, after some convincing, they managed to get you to join in on one of their games. At first you were apprehensive, obviously, but they explained that they were trying to diversify their platform and find a more mature audience so, actually interacting with girls on the internet was their first step.

You and the boys had been friends for forever, you met them through Nick in elementary school and had basically all been inseparable ever since, you'd been in some earlier videos but the fans back then made it very difficult to just exist around them so, you took it upon yourself to only exist in their real life, not their online one.

Cut to right now, you're nearly two hours deep in fortnite trios with the boys on stream, everyone was super excited to see you when they announced that they'd be joining and, other than a couple comments that you all ignored, it was going really well.

"Matt, someone asked what our types are" Chris laughed, reading the chat.

"I'm not answering that" Matt dead panned, screwing his face up at the camera

"I can answer it for you both, for sure" you chuckle, "chat do you want me to answer it?"

"yes, yes, yes, yes, omg yes" Chris was reeling off the answers in chat, "everyone wants y/n/n to answer, Matt should we let her?" Chris asked.

Matt rolled his eyes with a smile, "g'head, y/n/n, expose us" He chuckled.

"okay, so" you said, in your best girly gossip voice, "Matt likes nerdy, reader, soft girls" you begin to explain, your train of thought is interrupted by Chris erupting into laughter.

"dude she's so right! you love a girl that looks like she's always buried in a book" Chris wails.

"what are you guys even saying?" Matt complains, the smile etched across his face giving his tone a lot less power.

"you definitely want a girl who will go on a hike with you or some shit, Matt" You say, enjoying this whole interaction a bit too much.

Chris was keeled over in laughter, loving finally being able to talk about this kind of stuff on the internet without everyone going insane.

"I dunno why you're laughing so much, Chris, you're next" Matt states, Chris shrugs in reply.

"i don't give a fuck, call me out y/n/n, gimme the best you got" Chris sits back in his chair, arms folded over his chest.

"hmmmm" you say, exaggerating your thinking, "what is the famous Christopher Sturniolos type" you rub your chin, pretending to be thinking deeply.

A knowing smirk is spread wide across Chris' face as he stares at your face on his screen, tongue prodding the side of his cheek.

"I know Chris' type" Matt adds, a menacing smile on his face.

"g'head matt, you take this one" you gesture to the boy on your screen.

"Chris likes girls who don't like him back" Matts brows raise in accusation towards Chris.

You try and hide the smile forming on your face, attempting to look as focused on the game as possible as your tongue prods at your teeth. Neither of the boys say anything, both of them cheesing, Matt in a teasing and knowing kind of way and Chris more so in a 'I cant say what I wanna say' kind of way.

"damn, Matt, you just called me the fuck out" Chris shakes his head, looking to the tiny version of you on his screen.

You're still quiet, trying to fight the smile on your face and look as focused as possible, you catch Chris looking as if he's looking at you on his screen and shake your head with a chuckle.

"what you grinnin' at, kid?" Chris smirks.

You raise your brows, shaking your head with a downwards smile, "no, nothin', nothin" you say, returning your focus back to the game.

All of the viewers watched the interaction and were blowing up the chat with comments about how Chris definitely likes you, saying things like 'did you guys see that?!', and 'think they're slick look at how they're both smiling!!!!!'. Chris was reading the comments and trying to hide the red blush crawling its way onto his cheeks, Matt was relishing in the fact that Chris was so obviously nervous, and you were just trying not to react.

"Chris, dude, you better wipe that smile off your face, chat's onto you" Matt pokes the bear.

"chat ain't onto shit, Matt, shut the fuck up" Chris says, trying to be serious but unable to push his smile down.

"you know i'm right though, you do like girls who don't want you" Matt pushed on with his joke.

"Matt, shut your fuckin' mouth, dude" Chris rolled his eyes and shook his head, his smile still prevalent.

You couldn't help but laugh, still pretending to not care about the situation unfolding. In hindsight, it probably made it all the more obvious that you knew exactly what Matt was referring to.

"you're awful quiet, y/n/n, you got nothing to say on Chris' type?" Matt extends his joke over to you and your attention is immediately on him.

"nah, you hit the nail on the head, I think" you shrug, stretching back in your chair and adjusting your headset.

"oh really?" Chris replies, brows raised in accusation.

"mhm" you nod, faux innocently.

Chris kisses his teeth, nodding and trying to hide the smile on his face once again.

"yeah, chat, Matts right, I like pretty girls, who don't like me back" Chris says, subtly turning his attention to you and then back to chat.

You roll your eyes with a smile, leaning forward once more to lock into the game.

"you're ridiculous, Chris" Matt chuckles into the mic, watching you shift in your seat, trying not to blush.

The rest of the game went off without a hitch, you guys went on to win multiple times and all the viewers eventually stopped trying to get the conversation back to Chris' obvious crush on you. You played until the early hours of the morning, joking and laughing with the boys' just like old times and relishing in the fact that you were finally able to be a part of their online presence again. When it hit around three a.m you told them you had to sign off, explaining that you had to be up early for college that morning.

"guys, I gotta go, but I'll text you when I wake up" you said, pulling off your headset, and brushing your hair back with your hand.

"alright, y/n/n, thanks for helping us bury kids, its always a treat" Matt grinned at you, shooting you his token boyish smile.

"you know I live to humble kids on fort, Matt" You shrugged, putting on your best boyish persona, earning a laugh from Matt

"okay seriously, I gotta go, bye chat!" you smile, "bye boys" you go to switch off your computer but you're stopped by Chris booming voice.

"bye, beautiful" he says, a cheesy grin on his face.

your eyes roll to the back of your head as an uncontrollable smile finds your lips, "bye, Chris" you reply, switching off your computer.

The whole chat erupts with people losing their minds over Chris calling you beautiful, the boys say nothing, Matt just shakes his head, laughing at the chat as he watches Chris, grinning with pride and completely unashamed of his very obvious crush on you.

taglist: @sturniozalt@mattslolita@shaquilles-0atmeal@blahbel668@sleepysturniolo@le4hsblog @sarosfilms @joemamaaa42069 @2muchofaslvt @seluky10

[dreamauri]

♪ — 𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗬 𝗪𝗘𝗥𝗘 𝗦𝗧𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗦 - part five lando norris x  fem! streamer! reader (fluff) series summary . . . After unexpectedly making a new friend during a stream, Lando finds himself addicted to playing video games with this girl who he can't get out of his head. His addiction gets worse when he somehow finds himself yearning for her company, eager to spend time with her in any shape or form, whether it's online or maybe possibly in person.

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Lando looked around cautiously, pulling his luggage along the smooth airport floors to the exit. He pursed his lips with a sigh. Plucking his phone from his hoodie pocket, He pulled the cap on his head further down to avoid being recognised. But you knew it was him right away, jogging over. 

When Lando saw you you could swear his smile was so wide it lit up the whole airport. 

“So good to see you again.” You sigh, greeting him with a little hug. 

“You’ve grown taller.” Lando joked as he hugged you back, sighing internally in relief that he got to hold you again. He’s been spending a lot of his free time ( and his not-so-free time ) on Stardew Valley in hopes of interacting and spending more time with you. But nothing compared to actually being here with you.

The two of you looked at each other with a smile for a few seconds before his eyes caught the watch on your wrist. 

“Oh wow, pretty.” He hummed playfully, lifting your wrist to his ear so he could listen to the ticks of your Richard Mille— which was just an excuse so he could hold your hand.

“Alright, let's go.” Lando nodded, keeping your hand held in his own, the back of your hand pressed to his chest like it was some valuable treasure he feared others might try to steal from him.

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“We’re not going to get caught.” You assured Lando as you walked through the huge halls. The Brit was wearing inconspicuous clothes, trying to blend in with university students. You’d had one last lecture for the day and decided to drag Lando along because you didn’t want to leave him alone. This wasn’t Melbourne, “you don't know the place or people around here” was your excuse. Sure, Lando is a grown man and would do fine on his own for an hour and a half but you just wanted to drag him along.

Settling down in a row closer to the back, Lando finds himself getting bored pretty easily. He never graduated secondary school, you can’t expect him to understand the ecology of coral reefs. Leaning his cheek on his fist, watching you scribble notes and diagrams along with formulas with long equations and letters.

He was lucky that fifteen minutes into the lecture he discovered your gorgeous laptop waiting for him in your bag, using the mouse pad so his clicks aren't loud when he plays Fortnite. And when the two students snickering behind him snickered and laughed, he gave them a good glare that probably shut them up. A normal person wouldn’t expect an F1, Lando Norris nonetheless, to randomly be sitting in front of you in your lecture playing Fortnite and then glare at you when you laugh at them. 

When the lecture ended and people started getting up to leave, Lando lowered the laptop screen watching you go over your notes one last time, jotting questions on a stick before stuffing your belongings away and getting up. And just as the two of you were climbing the stairs to leave the room, “Ms. Ln, if I could talk with you for a second.”

Clenching your jaw, you give Lando a look telling him to stay right where he stood while you jog down the steps to your professor. Lando holds the strap of his bag as he watches you talk with your teacher before being handed a nice thick stack of papers. “Oh and Lando,” The man in his early forties called for your friend, rummaging through his book bag.

You found yourself blushing embarrassed at being discovered, not expecting your teacher of all people to recognize Lando. You watched as Lando jogged down the stairs when asked to sign the McLaren hat your professor had pulled out. “Is Yn a good student?” Lando joked with a smile as he drew his name with a Sharpie. “One of the best.” Your professor chuckled, returning your wave as you walked out with Lando.

“I’m pretty sure some kids recognized me so we better kick off.” He said quietly in your ear. With a nod, you checked your watch which gave a smile as it told you the time.

On the bus, you hugged your bag to your chest as you sat beside Lando. “Still can’t believe you don’t have a car.” You chuckled looking up at him with a smirk. 

“What? You’ve never been on public transport?” you tease back.  Lando scoffed. “I rode the train with Carlos once when we were going to the Drive To Survive premier.” He justified folding his arms with a huff. You rolled your eyes playfully. “I don’t mind busing. Doesn’t bother me. Besides, I can’t drive anyway.” You breathe out, leaning back and closing his eyes.

Lando knew you couldn’t afford a car when you called a cap to pick you up at the airport. You're out here on your own and studying in a foreign country, it’s common to not be able to rent or own cars. But never had Lando assumed that you couldn’t drive. He never expected it. And it just felt wrong. The Brit lets you lean your head on his shoulder, watching you scroll through your phone until you fall asleep.

He didn’t move a muscle, keeping a hand around your shoulders to hold your steady during stops or speed bumps. Or maybe he just wanted to hold you close to him. When it was time to get off, Lando was glad you had the trip active on Google Maps so you didn’t find yourself waking up in another city. He held your hand as he walked your still-sleepy figure off the bus and up to your apartment building. He was glad he was holding you again, even if it was just your hand. It made him happy that you didn’t let go.

“My roommate is only here on the weekends so we’re free.” You unlocked the door with your free hand and kicked your shoes off once you entered, the Brit copying your movements. You stretched your hands and body before crouching down to greet the cat that rubbed himself on your ankle. 

Lando chuckled as he plopped on the couch watching you open the fridge and pulling out Red Bull. “Default flavour, Norris?” You ask, tossing him the blue and silver can. Lando caught the drink easily and pulled the tab open with a ‘fzzzz’. Sitting on the couch beside him, you sipped your drink while looking disappointed at the mess of an attempt to build a shelf you had bought a few days prior.

“Sorry for the mess, I would've cleaned up if you told me you were coming sooner. Or should’ve just got it from Ikea where they give instructions.” You sigh, kicking the nails and wood away in hopes of gathering the mess in one spot so it could be forgotten in a corner. Lando waved it off. “You should see my apartment. ” He assured, “I can help you with it later.” He offered and you smiled with a sigh. “I’d love that.” You nodded looking at him. Lando returned your smile.

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“It’s not that hard.” Lando scolded as he slowed beside you, reaching over and fixing the belt around your chest. “Right pedal to go, left to stop.” he reminded. You watched him as he went off in his kart, stopping a few meters away to see if you were following. 

The perks of having Wednesday mornings off are that everyone is at their jobs and the kids are at school, leaving Lando the opportunity to drag you to a karting track in attempt to teach you how to drive. And he was successful, other than the fact that you were sticking to slower speeds than Lando would've liked. 

In the end, you’d stayed three and a half hours instead of the original one and a half. It leaves you feeling dizzy whenever you walk as if you were still driving. 

The walk from the track to was filled with laughter as you held your hands up. Lando wrapped his arm around your waist to keep you from stumbling, pulling you along. The laughing didn’t stop. You snuggled into each other in a cafe booth, sharing a menu.

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[heart4caitlin]

— Paige Bueckers gf headcanons

ummm

clingy gf?? like i can just see her all up on you some days especially after a long practice or losing a game

she has the worst photos of you… youre sleeping on her bed, hair all messy, mouth wide open?? shes got it and posted it on instagram stories

i can see her flexing on everyone about you. maybe yall went on a date or something and she wont stop yapping to her teammates about you

being late to practice because she doesnt wanna get out of bed with you :(

rests all her weight on top of you when cuddling, just needs to be close to your after a long exhausting day

“babe, i can’t breath”

“oh well”

stares at you with so much love in her eyes. could barely hide yalls relationship online, ESPECIALLY DURING A LIVE… she stares at you when you talk and its so obvious that she was deep in it for you

doing her hair PLEASE. i know she has that one hairstyle she wears all the time BUT, what about making her try out different ones just to play with her hair?

probably steals your clothes too. couldn’t find a hoodie for a month and then you joined kk’s live one day and paige was wearing it

username: paige is that my hoodie

“i don’t have your hoodie, what?”

dragging you out of bed so she can go buy trufru bc she ran out…

if you dont play basketball she is so forcing you to learn. bringing you to the court just so she can show you how to dribble and shoot a three pointer. she claims youre the best basketball player

if you wear make up i feel like she would help you get ready. like that one live with kate wanting to do jadas makeup ugh. would so help you and make sure to tell people she had done it

waking up in the middle of the night to her all up on you. cannot sleep in the same position at all. literal star fish position half the time. she’ll have her legs all up on you, an arm slung over your chest and all

if you ever wake up and have to pee, youre screwed!! paige is not moving off of you, she wants you in bed until it’s time for her to get up

her always wanting to help make dinner with you, especially if you love cooking/baking. she probably has a folder of recipes to use

back to the second bullet point, she has so many photos of you. has a folder named “my girl” or something cute and its photos and videos of you

makes you do tiktoks with her and kk… she’ll even kick kk out some of them so its just her and you

the fans go CRAZY over you. the amount of edits both of you get tagged in oh lord

she definitely has a folder full of edit of you because she thinks youre so pretty in them

would love getting into your interests as well. for example, you like reading?? she wants to buy every single book she sees just for you. she’ll sit there and let you go on and on about the book

i can imagine her wanting to do your nails too. but if you get them professionally done then she’ll send so many ideas for you to pick from

this is all i can think of at the moment!! thank you so much for reading, please reblog for me<3

[chibigaia-art]

What are ur favorite video essays?

you activated my trap card!!!!!!! here's some video essays/long form videos for u, just not all my faves or the list would be insane long

Pathologic is genius and here's why

The last Bronycon

The bizzarre world of fake video games

The rise and fall of Gaia Online

A thorough look at Resident Evil

A thorough look at Fallout

The future is a dead mall - Decentraland and the Metaverse

The cruelest video game

Action button reviews: Tokimeki memorial

Victorious retrospective part 1 part 2

Cardcaptor Sakura is a beautiful mess

Defunctland: The american idol theme park experience

Burn book: I fell for Caroline Calloway's never ending scam

Lost and cancelled dolls

Homestuck sent me a legal threat and then it got worse

A lukewarm defence of fifty shades of grey

would also recommend to watch the roblox oof.mp3 and Disney channel theme: a history mystery to feel a wide range of emotions about art and crediting people for their work

[monsterfactoryfanfic]

30 Sickos, 3.5 Stars, and Pervert Writers

As I gear up to publish Detente for the Ravenous, I've been thinking a lot about these tweets. I know that my writing is solid, but it's not groundbreaking. My designs are fun, but they're not revolutionary. My prose is simple, my plots well-trodden. The fights and monsters kick ass, but god help me my romance is milquetoast at best. It's not what I'm interested in. I'm interested in the 30 years war and Catholic kaiju.

We like to quantify things, online. When I'm shopping for games, I sort by "most popular" and "highest rated." I don't want my time to be wasted, I don't want to spend my money sub-optimally. It's easier to connect to folks over a movie that 3 million people watched as opposed to a podcast listened to by a few hundred. I am not criticizing the impulse. Life is too short, and none of us have enough money.

But as a creator, whatever that means, I think I have to get comfortable with my shortcomings, and be honest about what I actually care about. I am not interested in writing a novel that appeals to all people. I am interested in writing a novel where they assassinate Pope Kissinger. That doesn't mean I won't ever try to improve my romance, or make my character arcs less predictable. But if I am gonna write another book, I have to write it for me, not for my imagined literary agent or Big 5 editor.

There's this great manifesto on itchio by “Average Urotsukidōji Enjoyer," called "Good Writers are Perverts." It touches on this sentiment that I've been stewing on, and I think this passage crystalizes what I'm trying to do with my own work.

I know my best work is the work of the pervert, the ex catholic who grew up on Naruto, the military history dork who trained for years to save lives instead of taking them. That is the stuff that makes me want to create, the hope that I can take all my stupid interests and life experiences and twist them into something at least partially interesting, to hit that 3.5 star rating that isn't all things to all people, but is at least one really good thing to a few people. If a handful of young folks get ahold of my work and it changes their lives in a small way forever, then I'll be happy.

I hope that as art becomes less profitable, as financial incentives only encourage the bland and inoffensive, the tried and true instead of niche and experimental, more artists double down, go deep instead of wide. I'm not afraid to fail, I'm afraid of trying so hard to be loved that I stop giving a shit about the craft

[jymwahuwu]

I have an idea. A self-aware au. What if Jing yuan/Blade is aware of darling's affection for him since they would log in the game and just see him and just admire them that is until Genshin drops 4.1 trailer and saw Arlecchino and Neuvillette and now they're envious of these two taking away their darling's attention.

It's just an interesting idea tho. But in actuality I'd think neuvillette and him would be friends or somewhat

Hello, this anon has similar thoughts!! Put them together to answer >_< I think they will be really jealous of the genshin impact characters who are stealing your attention lol. Jing Yuan's jealousy is more harmless (seemingly), while Blade's is more aggressive (?)

This is my first time writing a self-aware AU, hope you like it!!

CW: yandere, self-aware au

Jing Yuan and Blade have their own lives.

When you're not with them, when you're not in front of the screen or looking at them with a smile or wonder. They are handling the work/tasks of the Seat of Divine Foresight/Stellaron Hunters. Blade, Silver Wolf and Kafka were practicing the new "destiny" script and took away another Stellaron. Jing Yuan is managing Luofu and attending meetings. How strange. Once you click on the space screen to enter the game, they can see your face. You organize your team and do daily tasks with them.

At first, they thought it was some kind of prank or a conspiracy, but over time they got used to it. In Elio's words, "The world is like a video game. No one can prove whether the world is real or false. Feeling the current destiny is the most important thing."

For Jing Yuan, he just got familiar with your personality. He confirmed that your presence would not put Luofu in danger, and that you acted like a cute kitten playing with a ball of yarn. You can control Luofu's General and Stellaron Hunter, and all you do is wander around Xianzhou and buy snacks to feed them, break every poor object on the way, fight to get some rewards, take the books on the table, etc.

You didn't forget to "build" them either. They watch you search for "Jing Yuan", "Blade", "build", "guide" and other keywords on the Internet, and take them to fight again and again to get materials to upgrade. Although they have actually participated in some wars and have terrible strength, what you see here is "lv 1-80".

You really like them, otherwise you wouldn’t pull, right? You even take photos of them while wandering around the map. Jing Yuan snickered when you took Blade to take a selfie in front of his wanted poster. The general is not shy about giving you a smile either. They know your admiration because you always take more than one photo.

Until… recently, they noticed that you weren't online as often. At one point, you log in again, and then, as if you thought of something important, you search "genshin impact" on Youtube (they know the name of the site) and start watching trailers and special programs.

What's this?

You stared intently at those…those people. White curly bangs, long hair like a waterfall, and his gorgeous and decent attire. The other man has short black hair. He punches enemies in live. A woman with short gray and white hair smiles confidently.

Jing Yuan opened his eyes wide, not expecting you to be so "frivolous" - did you plan to be unfaithful to him? You found Jing Yuan pouting at you in the game, but you thought you were hallucinating, so you gave him immortal's delight and puffergoat milk to comfort him. Blade clicked his tongue, crossed his arms in boredom, and stopped observing what you were doing on the other side of the screen. Silver Wolf and Kafka teased him about whether he was separated from the little player? Jealous? You're surprised to notice that his damage has been doubled. While on a mission, Blade almost lost control and killed a person on the script. His eyes as red as candlelight flashed, and he almost swung down the sword in his hand.

They are all looking for opportunities to get close to you. That part of Xianzhou's large computer installation called "loom" is running, investigating and analyzing you.

[callsignseagull]

all you had to do was stay ✪ part 1

Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x fem!reader

Summary: Six years ago Jake hit your life like a hurricane. In and out in a matter of weeks. You thought after you get over the disappointment of him leaving without saying a word you’d never think of him again. But then two pink lines change your life forever. Now he’s back and still has no idea that the little girl by your side is his daughter. 

Words: 2.1k

Warnings: Not much, honestly. maybe just a little angsty 

A/N: Here’s part one!! I hope you like it! It's a little on the short side but hopefully there'll be more soon :))

feedback is always appreciated :)

series masterlist

You’re sitting at the dining table, scrolling through your emails with one hand while holding your toast in the other. You’ve become a pro at multitasking.

“Mommy? Do you think they have churros at that market Penny is taking me?” Your daughter is munching on a toast of her own, crumbs sticking to her cheeks. 

“I’m sure.” You smile. “And I’m sure if you ask nicely, Penny will get some for you.” 

She grins before taking another bite of her toast and you can’t help but reach over and give her a kiss. You can’t believe how fast she’s growing up. At now five years old, Josie is your entire world. As shocked and scared as you were when you found out about her, she’s the best thing that ever happened to you.   

Turning back to your laptop, you flag the most important mails so you don’t forget to follow up on them later. The time before one of your books releases is always the most stressful, but you wouldn’t change it for the world. You got so lucky. 

You wrote and illustrated your first children’s book while being pregnant with Josie, it gave you something to distract yourself from all the changes you were going through. And then you posted about it online, it went sort of viral and then a publisher reached out to you. The book was an immediate success. It’s been translated in several different languages and they even make stuffed toys and board games based on your characters now.

And now you’re about to release the fifth book in the series. It’s hard to churn one out every year, but you’re scared that if you drop the ball, all you’ve worked for will be ripped from you. You want to give Josie the best life possible, so you work your ass off. 

When both of you are finished with breakfast, you clean up the table and tell Josie to put her shoes on. As you slip into your own shoes, you whistle for Muffin, the four year old poodle mix you adopted from a rescue last year, and he comes trotting around the corner moments later. 

After checking you’ve got everything you lock the front for behind you, hold your free hand out for Josie to take, the other holding Muffin’s leash. Then, the three of you take on the short walk towards the Hard Deck. 

Penny Benjamin has been a life saver these last few years, throughout your pregnancy and beyond. She’s been there for you whenever you needed her, day or night. You don’t know what you would’ve done without her. And now she’s somewhat of a grandma figure for Josie, and she’s probably the hottest grandma ever. Her and Amelia are the closest thing you and Josie have to a family, besides each other.

Today, Penny is taking Josie to a Food Market while you look after the bar for a couple hours. It’s still early and not many people will be there, but you’re glad you can help Penny out while still getting some work done for yourself.

“There’s my favourite little family!” Penny greets, as you enter the Hard Deck, her arms wide and Josie immediately runs towards her and into her arms. 

“Hi Penny! I’m so excited! Are you excited? Do you think they’ll have churros?” Josie rambles with glistening eyes, her dimples on show and for a moment you’re reminded of how much she looks like her father. You manage to push thoughts of him to the back of your mind most days but sometimes you just look at her and all you can see is him. 

You haven’t tried reaching out to him again. You know you should’ve. But it felt wrong sending him a text telling him he’ll be a father. And you doubted that he even wanted to be a father. So you decided you’d spare yourself, and your daughter, the heartache. Josie hasn’t asked about her father much, but when she did you told her that he’s a pilot in the Navy and that he loves her. You never want her to feel like she’s not wanted.  

✩̿✪̿✩̿

Jake knew he’d come back eventually. He just didn’t know it would take him so long. But if he was being honest with himself he knew that if it wasn’t for him being called back to Top Gun for some top secret mission he still wouldn’t have had the guts to come back here. Hell, he’s been living only a few hours north from here for the past couple of years. He easily could’ve made the drive down. But he’d always been good at coming up with excuses. But now he couldn’t. Not when he’s in the same city for the next few months. He’d constantly be looking for you. Seeing you in every face that just slightly resembled yours. He didn’t even know if you still lived in San Diego, though. But going to the Hard Deck seemed like the logical thing to do. Even if you weren’t working there anymore, Penny Benjamin might know where to find you.

As soon as he enters the bar he’s hit with nostalgia. Nothing has changed. He takes a look around and pretends he’s the six years younger version of himself, still naive enough to think that nothing will ever rattle him.

Since it’s still the early afternoon it’s not busy and there seems to be no one behind the bar right now. With a deep sigh he sits down in one of the barstools, then notices someone crouched down behind the bar, looking for something in a cabinet. 

His breath catches in his throat. It can’t be.

He hasn’t seen you in six years, and even though he can’t see your face right now, he knows it’s you. He can feel it. 

Now he really feels like he’s been transported back six years in time. You haven’t noticed him yet and he can’t hold back the words that are going through his head.

“Can you pinch me? Because I can’t believe you’re real. I thought I was dreaming.” He knows it’s a bit of a dick move, throwing his first thing he ever said to you at you now. But maybe you’re not as mad at him as he thinks? What if you don’t even remember him? He hadn’t thought about that. Fuck. 

✩̿✪̿✩̿

You almost hit your head when you spin around towards him.  This can’t be real.

“What are you doing here?” You must look like you’ve seen a ghost, but it honestly feels like that. He looks the same but he doesn’t. He’s filled out more, even though you never thought it possible. And he just looks overall more mature. It suits him. 

“What am I doing here in San Diego or what am I doing here at the Hard Deck?” He tilts his head, a small smile on his face. You don’t grace that with an answer, he knows what you mean. The smile slowly drops from his face, and there’s a seriousness in his eyes that makes it impossible for you to look away. “I was hoping to find you here.”

“Why?”

“I want to apologise.” 

That makes you straighten up. Apologise? After six years? 

“I was an absolute asshole to you and you didn’t deserve that. I was going through a rough time and I took all that out on you. I’m sorry. And I’m sorry I just left without saying goodbye. I got called on a mission right after graduation and when I got back I figured you didn’t wanna talk to me ever again.”

His words take your breath away for a moment. Never in a million years did you think you’d get an apology from Jake. 

“I-,” you stop, wringing your hands together. At a loss for words.

“You don’t have to say anything.” He smiles softly. “I’m in town for a while. Maybe we could … I don’t know … hang out sometime? Catch up?”

As much as you want to protect your heart and tell him no, you know you have to catch him up on what happened after he left. It’s not right to keep him in the dark now that he’s here. You know that.

“You don’t have to answer me now. Take some time to think about it. I’m sure you’re busy, with your books being such a success. And you’re still working at the bar?” He looks curious and you’re a little shocked.

“I’m just helping Penny out for a couple hours. You know about my books?”

“My nieces love them.” He grins. “I have to read them to them before bed every time I’ve got time to visit them down in Texas.”

“You’ve got nieces?” 

“Yeah, they’re two and four. Love them to death. My Mom’s been begging for grandkids for years and she’s so happy to dote on them every chance she gets.”

Your heart constricts. Two and four. They’re younger than Josie. Not only does she have cousins somewhere in Texas, she’s also the first grandchild to a woman who’s never met her. Who doesn’t even know about her. But you don’t know much about Jake’s parents. Maybe she wouldn’t be the biggest fan of a child out of wedlock. 

You glance at Jakes hand. No ring. 

You muster up the courage to your next question. You know the answer might hurt, but you have to ask him.

“Any kids of your own?” 

Jake shakes his head with a laugh, “No, not that I know of.” 

It’s just a joke but you feel like it makes your heart stop before it starts beating rapidly in your chest. This is it. There’s no better moment than now. Just get it over with.

“Jake, I-“ 

“Mommy!” Josie comes barreling through the door, Penny a few steps behind her. “Penny let me have Churros and they were delicious!” She wraps her arms around you and looks up at you with her sparkling green eyes.

Maybe you don’t even have to tell him. You glance at Jake and he looks a bit taken aback.

“Yeah, honey? Did you have fun?”

“So much fun!” She grins, showing off her deep dimples, and you run a hand over her head before giving her a kiss. You manage to look at Penny, who’s glaring at Jake. It takes all your courage to look at him. He doesn’t even seem to notice Penny, his eyes focused on the girl in your arms. You can’t read the expression on his face, has he already realised how much she looks like him? 

“Well, I guess I don’t have to ask you if you have any.” He smiles, his lips tight, then looks at your daughter and his smile turns more genuine. “What’s your name, sweetheart?” Hearing the term of endearment again makes goosebumps raise on your skin. 

“Josie.” She’s not a shy kid, so you’re not surprised when she looks at him curiously and asks, “Who are you?” 

Your grip tightens around her but before you can say anything he replies, “I’m an old friend of your Mom.” 

You shoot him a really? look but he just shrugs his shoulders. Well, you guess it is inappropriate to tell your five-year-old daughter that he used to fuck your brains out. 

“Thanks for helping out.” Penny says, “Both of you.” She winks at Josie. 

Muffin comes trotting around the corner and Josie let’s go of you to throw her arms around the poodle mix. “I missed you!” While Muffin covers your daughter’s face in slobber, Jake huffs out a laugh. 

“A dog, too, huh?” 

You shrug your shoulders, not sure what to say to that. 

“Does the house have a picket fence?” It’s a bit of a loaded question, you think, but you don’t read too much into it and reply truthfully, thinking about the little house you put a down payment on a couple years ago. 

“It does.” 

Jake rubs his chest and gives you that tight lipped smile again. “I’m happy for you.” 

He means it, you can tell. “Thanks, Jake.”

He gets up from his seat at the bar, knocks on the wood a couple times then says. “Your husband is one lucky guy.” Another tight lipped smile.

“My wha-?” 

“I’ll see you around.” He nods then turns on his heel and before you can comprehend what just happened he’s gone.

“Mommy, why did he say your husband? You don’t have one of those.” 

“I don’t know, honey.” 

You watch him cross the parking lot to his car and it dawns on you that he thinks that all your dreams came true:  become a full time illustrator, fall in love, get married, adopt a dog, buy a little house, have kids.

Little does he know that you fell in love with him, had his kid, and did all of the rest on your own. 

taglist: @annathesillyfriend ✪ @lovebittenbyevans ✪ @heyhihellowhatsup0 ✪ @one-sweet-gubler ✪ @emorychase ✪ @wooya1224 ✪ @novagreen04 ✪ @iammirrorball ✪ @lolcaca ✪ @caitsymichelle13 ✪ @soulmates8 ✪ @soleilgrec ✪ @lilylilyyyyyy ✪ @winters-queen ✪ @i0veless ✪ @the-romanian-is-bae ✪ @mandyppp ✪ @dempy ✪ @mizuki80 ✪ @lumpypoll ✪ @averyhotchner ✪ @babyice1274 ✪ @captain-fandomwriter58 ✪ @hangmanscoming ✪ @caidi-paris ✪ @linkpk88 ✪ @djs8891 ✪ @xomrsalliej4787xo ✪ @lnmp89 ✪ @startrekfangirl2233 ✪ @gigisimsonmars ✪ @merishfit ✪ @clancycucumber230 ✪ @sky0401 ✪ @emilyoflanternhill ✪ @roostersforevergirl ✪ @celestialeviereads ✪ @blackwidownat2814 ✪ @impossiblebagelcowboyfreak ✪ @grxcisxhy-wp ✪ @atarmychick007 ✪ @dakotakazansky ✪ @fulla02 ✪ @alana4610 ✪ @callsignwidow ✪ @memoriesat30 ✪ @ebonyhogan24

[gremlinmodetweeker]

riffing off socially awkward deeply anxious König, do you think he would do better digitally? chatting with someone he met online or someone who streams an obscure game? you have a lovely relationship with him and then before you meet in person he's like so. i'm. very. awkward. as a real person. i might not. talk a lot. you'll be carrying the conversation, don't take it personally. you have a captive audience for ANY topic. anything. you want. and why is it going to be a/b/o's spn origins

Okay yes this absolutely. I can totally write something for that. I hope this story suffices!

Now, I have no idea what you mean by the omegaverse, but I could try making an omegaverse!König if you’d like. I do not understand by spn omegaverse origins. Please feel free to either respond here or ask in my inbox. It should be open??? Tell me if it isn’t.

Anyways, onto the story! More below the cut.

König Prefers Quiet Time

König is a voracious reader, so he’s rather verbose and eloquent when online. His messages are witty, insightful, yet practical and grounded. He’s quick to become your best online friend. After all, he’s so well-spoken! He writes beautiful paragraphs that are easy and amusing to read. It’s rare to find such a delightful person online.

And he’s so quick to win over your heart. Whenever he can be, he there’s for you. He’ll take pictures and videos of sights on deployment or jot down little stories to tell you when he can. Sometimes he can drop off the face of the earth, but he’ll be back online soon enough and messaging you about how his latest mission went and what he did (within reason, can’t give away secrets).

Every time he comes back online, you know you’re in for a good time. Whether it’s him complaining about teammates, or having to argue about directions with a local, he’s got fantastic (yet terribly awkward) stories about his days. He always says he’s so shy and hates social situations, and sure he sometimes sounds a bit strange when he recounts the stories, but they're so fun that you don't really take in how it would look from an outside perspective. Sure, he sounds a bit dorky in these stories, but still so eloquent! He’s got this little way of describing things with abstract metaphors that make you smile and wish you were there by his side.

It took a lot to convince him to have a relationship with you. It’s not that he doesn’t like you, it’s that you ask to meet up in person. He tells you that he’s happy to meet you, but then why does he suddenly have more missions? He’s so punctual, but he missed his flight? When he goes on about having a stubbed toe, you have to put your foot down. You want to see him, and that’s final.

Begrudgingly, he books a vacation with you.

When you go to pick him up from the airport, the first thing that stands out about him is how tall he is. Then how big. You didn’t think they made people in that size. This guy has Shaquille O’Neil running for his money. Like, how? And then you realize that he’s crouching down to make himself look smaller. It’s insanity. At the very least, he’s easy to pick out in a crowd, what with his hood and all. You do worry about him fitting in the car, though.

So you go up to him, and then he sees you and he looks nothing but elated. It’s a beautiful moment between you two. In that hectic airport, with people calling in many languages and bags squeaking and the cars outside honking and revving their engines, it’s perfectly silent and beautiful. It’s a wonderful moment that you think you’ll cherish until you die.

The next moment is where it all falls apart.

He accidentally drops his bag and it spills everywhere. He scrambles to pick it up and he keeps looking around with wide eyes of terror so you take pity on the poor lad and lean down to help. He then promptly stands up and cracks the crown of his head against your nose and now your nose is bleeding and oh no he dropped his bag again and now he’s apologizing and then he’s rushing to the bathroom and you’re left with the realization that you fell in love with an absolute mess. 

By the time he’s back, your nose has stopped bleeding and you’re packing his belongings back into his pack. He tries to silently offer you tissues, so you take them and wipe your nose tenderly, but when you make a joke about it he doesn’t say anything. Odd, but maybe he’s just a bit frazzled.

You’re driving back home when he finally says his first words to you besides ‘hi’, ‘sorry’ and ‘oh no’.

“Thank you,” he says as he stares at the road ahead.

“What, for the drive?” you laugh, “it’s no problem! I mean, it’s not too bad. It’s about an hour’s drive, but I’m fine with that!”

König says nothing, just nods as you speak. You’re starting to worry that you picked up the wrong person. Where was the confident and friendly man you spoke to online? Where was his friendly joking? At least you now understand his awkward and amusing stories he told you, because even though you love him, you can’t help but feel terribly awkward. If he’s this bad with you, you can only imagine how bad it is with others.

You were prepared for someone who was going to talk your ear off, but you felt like you just picked up a skinwalker instead. Was he even blinking? You can’t tell. He looks shell-shocked as he gazes off into the distance.

“So, um, how was the flight?” you ask with a wide smile.

“Gut.”

Anything more? No? Nothing more. Well, that’s helpful.

“Did they give you anything to eat on the flight? Are you hungry?” you ask, hoping to pry more than a couple words out of him.

“I ate,” he says quietly.

You nod and bite your lip. So this is what it was going to be like?

You take him into your home. For the entire night he refuses to take a step outside.

By the time noon rolls around the next day, you decide to take the initiative and knock on his door.

“Hey, König?” you call.

You get a hum from behind the door.

“Can I come in?” you ask nervously.

There’s a pause, then a hiss and a curse, then the door opens.

“Thanks,” you whisper as you squeeze by him, but he doesn't move to let you in any easier.

König sits delicately on the edge of the bed while you sit on a stool across from him. You look at each other for a few moments before you crack.

“Am I… Am I not what you thought I’d be?” you ask nervously.

König tilts his head as he narrows his eyebrows.

��I mean, just…” you sigh, “you talked so much online, but you’ve barely said a word since I picked you up from the airport. Are you okay? Is there something wrong?”

You hesitate for a moment, before you tack on, “Is there something wrong with us?”

König’s eyes slowly widen before he shakes his head quickly, the fabric swinging like a dog shaking after a dip in a lake.

“Nein, you are…” he gestures towards you with one hand, “you are perfect. It’s just… Ah…”

You brace yourself.

“I am not good at talking,” he admits.

You deflate. That’s it? He’s not good at talking?

“But you’re fine online,” you point out.

“Ja, but this is… It is different,” he sighs, “I am not good at talking to people in person. It is.. Scary. I do not like to talk much.”

You nod as you listen carefully.

“So…” you rub your thumb over your kneecap, “would you like me to do most of the talking for us? Would that make things easier for you?”

König nodded quickly.

You laugh as you feel your shoulders relax.

“Great. I think I can do that.”

From then on, the visit is wonderful. Now that you know that König just isn’t great at talking in person, it’s a delight to talk to him. Sometimes you think you talk at him, but you realize pretty quickly that he’s listening attentively to everything you say. He’s a delight to speak to. If you ever lose your train of thought, he’s quick to help you get it back so he can listen to you further.

You realize pretty quickly that he worries too much. When you take him out to places, he’s nervous and flighty. The louder and more chaotic, the worse his social anxiety gets. As such, you find yourself going to more quiet areas. You chill and relax in quiet cafes, go to the aquarium at night, even play some games at a board game cafe in the middle of the day, when there’s nobody else there.

He’s a friendly man, all things considered. You also quickly learn the basis of his awkward stories.

You’re at a grocery store when you see it in action.

“Oh my God you’re so tall!” a woman looks up at your boyfriend with wide eyes.

König barely turns to acknowledge her, but he gives her a curt nod.

“Can you, like, help me with something?” she asks eagerly.

König looks down at you, then back to the woman.

“What is it?” his voice is sharply cold, and you can see the woman wince.

“Well, um, there’s this thing on the top shelves, and I was hoping you could get it for me?” she says, a bit nervously.

“What is it?” he’s somehow worse than last time.

“Um, uh, I can show it to you?” she offers meekly.

“I need to know what it is,” König practically tears her head off with how brutal he sounds.

You grab his hand and squeeze slightly, but it seems like it’s all going downhill too quickly.

“It’s-”

König turns to face her abruptly and she’s stumbling back before scurrying off. König watches her go, then turns to you.

“Why did she go?” he asks innocently. You can hardly believe him.

“König…” you start slowly, “is that how you usually speak to strangers?”

He thinks for a moment, then nods.

“König I think I know why you think people hate you.”

König’s eyebrows raise up for a moment, “You do?”

You nod, and give him a brief explanation. You can see his brain doing somersaults in his head, practically melting out his ears as his entire world view is shattered before him. Before he can respond properly, the woman is coming back with security in tow.

It’s no wonder König has so many interesting awkward stories.

[goldensunset]

so i guess it didn’t occur to me but like. Yeah. even if the app is offline and only provides theater mode that’s still a real canon kingdom hearts entry. those cutscenes are part of the story. and that app is the official means by which those cutscenes are accessible. there’s youtube of course but that’s all the work of fans… without the uxdr app square enix is currently straight up not offering an actual official way to experience this story anymore. which is. really low. nintendo type move. and like. bad for an overarching story that relies on this and is only going to do so more and more…

i’m betting on this being the first symptom of square enix doing something new with this story in the future but for the time being it’s like. man that really reflects poorly… not that it’s even that irrational to take down an app that’s been dead for years now but what it does is bring to light how ridiculous it is that square enix hasn’t done anything else in that time. no announcement of a remake or other new means of making uxdr available, no warning about the app being removed, etc

not to sound like one of the mobile game saga haters but in the end. when you get practical with it. it really is unprofessional and far-fetched for game developers to expect the masses to get into a story that’s only accessible through a gallery of cutscenes on a mobile app. like i understand there are always gonna be casual fans who aren’t interested in every last side game ever (even if they’re wrong) but in general stuff like bbs and ddd or whatever we’re good at appealing to broader audiences. i think square enix really needs to face the reality that people want real and playable games and the rabid passion of us tumblr weirdos who will gladly watch hours of cutscenes isn’t enough to float their boat

like khux has been around for so long you’d think they’d have realized ‘hmm the cute little online pc/mobile game we made got popular and we expanded the lore a lot hmmmm maybe we should reconsider our initial choice if confining it to the realm of a cute little online pc/mobile game.’ it hurts my heart to hear people dissing the mobile games bc it’s done from ignorance of how good they are but i’m not mad at those people. they’re judging a book by its cover but like yeah some books have unappealing covers. i get it. not everyone will immediately see the hype. the khux superfan in me says skill issue they should try harder. the pragmatic person who wants the series to survive says square enix you gotta do something to appeal to the broader audience

and like only offering the thing in a mediocre form is bad enough but it’s even worse now if they don’t even let you have the thing at all. now it really is up to the fans to preserve this work of art? a set of crucial support beams for the entire mythos’ lore is being curated by youtubers doing this entirely out of passion? and square enix doesn’t see a problem with that? mannnn if you want to be taken seriously as a storyteller. provide access to your stories. ideally make it a good and widely popular type of access but at least do something. nintendo type of move smh . as long as they don’t go full nintendo and start striking down people who upload it online

[communistkenobi]

I’m listening to the podcast Game Studies Study Buddies review the book Engineering Play by Mizuko Ito. They’re discussing the theory of fun that gets argued for in this book, specifically in the context of children’s “edutainment” games that are/were common in North American primary schools (idk if they’re still popular, but I played a lot of them when I was kid) - that saying “I’m having fun” for children in this environment is a non-confrontational way of disagreeing with authority, that “having fun” is a good rationale for not listening to adults, not putting away the toys or getting off the computer or etc. Children grab onto the fact that playing these “edutainment” games and other “fun” activities they’re forced to do in school is premised on the idea that children learn better (and can be fooled into learning) when they’re “having fun.” This is despite the fact that the definition of “having fun” is often very different for adults in positions of authority than it is for children, but it is a shared language children can use to articulate their resistance to authority in these educational settings in a way that is not immediately read as hostile/anti-social (or at least, less so than outright saying “I don’t want to do what you’re telling me to do”).

And the hosts connect this to the concept of ‘escapist media’ - they call it “the rhetoric of non-obligation,” this idea that you can engage with a piece of art and intentionally not think about its political or social content as a way of “having fun,” that “having fun” is necessarily divorced from any critical evaluation of art, and that this rationale of having fun is sufficient to explain this mode of engagement. But when placed in the context of adults describing their relationship to mass produced art, it’s no longer a child bucking against authority, but rather a person resisting some larger critical discussion they perceive as authoritarian or otherwise intruding on their “fun” by being critical - in essence, viewing critical evaluation of a piece of art as a de facto argument to stop having fun, that the only reason to do this critical evaluation would be for the purposes of telling other people to stop having fun.

Obviously I don’t think everyone using the term ‘escapist media’ are like, automatically and universally behaving like children or anything, it is a widely popular term whose casual usage doesn’t mean you’re committing to that form of argument. But I do very frequently see people use their enjoyment of ‘escapist media’ as a way of like, articulating their desire not to confront critical readings of whatever they like, always placing “critical thinking” (a very loaded term) as this necessarily miserable, upsetting, unfun activity that can only ever intrude on an emotional state of “having fun.” And this includes a lot of discussions online about the benefits of “critically engaging” with media, that while it may not be fun it’s still necessary because it makes you more a moral/smart/sophisticated/etc person. and I think that is a very miserable way of approaching critical engagement

[coriphallus]

DA: The Veilguard Spoiler Review pt3 - Politiks

oh my little void in this world wide web, we are really in it now.

a little PSA before you read this word vomit, i am from westernmost middle east, and that will inform much of what i know about the topics i discuss. i wont know about race politics of america or the intricacies of it beyond what i can see online but as an immigrant i do have some perspective on western experience. so when i talk about heavy topics it will come from a foreign place. i do understand and admit that i cannot ignore that BW is a north american studio and that colours every theme they touch.

so there are two angles to approach this, 1st is to assess DAV on its own and 2nd is to assess it as a part of a whole and continuation of a franchise.

lets get 1st out of the way, its safely uncontroversial beyond taash's story. and eff-plays voiced my feeling verbatim on that subject more succinctly than anything i can possibly write.

2nd is very, very grim.

every DA game that came before had been interlaced with politics of its world so severely that its absence is disorienting. every game you were given the choice to change the political landscape of the countries youre playing in, for better or for worse. even the 2nd game with its vastly smaller scale sees hawke trying to navigate through their life as an immigrant, even at the games climax you are given a choice to drastically alter how this uprising will be remembered and it tells hawke that there are no half measures, they need to pick a side.

"Slavery or no, flesh is always for sale."

in my very first DAV playthrough i picked a shadow dragon elf, i didnt give her any backstory as i though being an elf in minrathous would shape her world view regardless.

first scene i got when organising my room rook pulls out the SHACKLES of a slave shes freed as she reminisces about how much good shes done, and puts them on her bedside. then proceeds to talk to a book and say "everybody looks down on elves but we were here first >:c"

(at this point i rerolled my character so i dont yet know how shadow dragon background plays out.)

at the very beginning of the game we see similar shackles and varric informs us that solas hates slavery, hes been freeing them.

when we make it to minrathous we learn that these people in neves circle have been freeing slaves.

alright so, the heavy handed deliveries aside, what purpose do all these scenes/expositions serve?

well, it makes these people look good. we know theres slavery in this part of thedas and these people are fighting against it not by any elaborate means but dont worry kitten <3.

[i had to look up the english for some of these terms so feel free to correct me if im wrong] patterson describes slavery as "one of the most extreme forms of the relation of domination, approaching the limits of total power from the viewpoint of the master, and of total powerlessness from the viewpoint of the slave". death of the soul, death of what makes one human -and for the purposes of this section- death in the eyes of state. slavery has such a long history that predates early modern colonization of africa by thousands of years. it is a staple of human history and where we have come from shapes what we are now. we can shun it, call it abhorrent but we cant pretend it never happened. theres always been people dead in the eyes of state.

heres the uncomfortable truth, there aint never been enough steel in the world to hold every hittite or mittani slave. to assume slavery is people getting abducted and put to irons is as naïve as human trafficking being a rando ruffying you and hauling you across the sea in a crate. yea, it could happen but 99% of the time its just a waste of time to physically hold someone against their will by force. and this idea makes us think its this far off thing that happened thousands of years ago by bad individuals doing very comically bad things, which is a very deliberate choice, because to depict period accurate slavery would be to portray social and economical classes, and that would be confronting how little we've changed in certain aspects.

people were born into that caste, shaped by it, worn down by it, and abused by it systematically.

in DAI Dorian says something -apparently- very controversial that i dont think this fandom has fully unpacked, and i aint gonna do that here either because im not remotely qualified. he likens the working class of south to slavery of north, theres no way to engage with this argument in any meaningful way, even as an elf, and in general people brush it off as dorians pro-slavery rhetorics.

try as DAV might to disregard, we actually did meet an ex-slave and trafficking victims on three separate occasions, and the games have set a premise already. we got to talk about their unique circumstances, and they were handled with some measure of dept. maybe you liked them, maybe you didnt, but you knew them and that makes a difference. they had agency in their own stories. a far cry from DAVs nameless faceless props for righteous gentiles to circle jerk about.

but, sure, lets tell ourselves showing them would be too gratuitous.

can you imagine how batshit insane it would look if zevran kept the belt her husband used to beat isabela with as a trinket, to display in his tent? that scene with rook disturbed me more than most anything in this entire franchise and coming from an anders supporter, thats saying something.

this is how little the writers were willing to engage with their source material. this is how little they are willing to engage with the world around them.

which makes the next blunder inevitable.

alot has been said about the absurdity of elves feeling responsible for the events of DAV, but maybe this hasnt been said enough; this is a blatant fascist rhetoric.

i will spell it out though, even though i never thought it needed to be said, the social performance of accountability indicates that the party who has done harm has benefited and continues to benefit from that harm, this is why reparations are paid, and thats what "check your priviledge" means. elves in DA have never benefited in any way from the warmongering of evanuris, they were enslaved by them.

to say that these people should feel some sort of responsibility towards what befell dwarves is a fascist rhetoric used irl to offload responsibility and divide and alienate the opposition further from eachother.

i cant tell you if this mouth piece is same everywhere but i know a few people who have clocked it immediately so im gonna assume it was obvious. and truthfully, i wouldnt even be annoyed if i thought it was intentional. genuinely, one of my favourite games is an unapologetic military propaganda whos protagonist would make ayn rand write sonnets about, and the game knows what it is. but no, i fully believe the studio tried to address the criticism they got about their lackluster handling of elves and either completely misunderstood or willfully disregarded the experiences of marginalised peoples that the games drew inspiration from.

the writing is so hollow beyond horrible dialogue that when writing an enby character whos also multicultural they didnt even notice the parallel theyve created. i know this because after an entire plotline about their struggle with binaries their story concludes with a binary decision on their culture. this just confirms to me that any dept this game has is completely accidental.

imma level with yall i dont subscribe to the belief that you need to have some type of experiences to write some type of characters and i find that "ofc a white person wrote it so..." response very tired because yea we should be allowed to expect more from white people. i too had OCs of different cultures that i wasnt very familiar with and handled poorly, but unlike me, a company can afford a consultant.

i played greedfall recently, and sure the maori tattoos were a shit decision, and im disappointed that after all the criticism they still stuck with it, and yes maybe its story was not sensitive enough but you know what? as the person whos recommended it to me said, i rather have a story who boldly engages with its own themes than one whos terrified of them. say what you will about its shortcomings but at least at the end of that game you can have an ending where the colonizers leave for good, and yes their plague is not healed but the narrative doesnt punish the natives for their isolationism. i am glad that the game allows that catharsis to its players.

DAV could have had 300 well thought-out endings and still not please everyone, but the endings they chose to include directly implicates the group theyre trying to appease and its literally just people who either want to punch or kiss solas, thats how fucking deep they think their fanbase it. not the people who wanted to end slavery, or achieve equilibrium with beings no matter how alien they are. or people who wanted to see a culture connect with its roots etc etc.

and maybe they were right, many people have been enjoying this game immensely and i am just, so fucking jealous. i wish i liked this game and enjoyed it and didnt want to tear out my hair every second i spent in treviso. i wish i wasnt seething white knuckling my sink like an insane person when a little kid wrote to crow rook that hes recruiting orphans now. i wish i had any belief in this game to read that as satire.

at least i wish i felt any form of vindication when i immediately realised this game was going to be a soulless cashgrab that unashamedly uses the name of a popular IP to push a sub-par product earlier this year, i just spend 80+ hours watching a company parade the carcass of a franchise i loved and beat it like a pinata as it continuously slapped me on the face with a botched wax figure of it.

i just feel this profound sense of sadness. i wish this game didnt exist. and no i dont feel any kind of brand loyalty, even when i actively enjoyed their work i didnt but i definitely dont now, not after 3 consecutive games that theyve delivered with more or less the same problems. as the company is today, i dont care whether bw survives or not, its been made clear time and again that the bw i liked is long gone and bw today is clearly not interested in making games for me.

even as i write this i dont feel fuelled by my anger for DAV but by the love a have for what came before. i still think the story deserved better, the fans deserved better, the people who contributed into making DA universe what it was before DAV deserved better. and, as rook told harding, our anger is justified.

but, hey. hair looks really good.

[damnfandomproblems]

In response to Fandom Problem #6253:

"Not when somebody says something negative about a problematic piece of media you like"

Purity culture is, in fact, also about this. Fear over people's moral "purity" of thought leads to a severe restriction of freedom of speech and castigation of people that break those boundaries. It's the reason Henry Miller and D.H. Lawrence were banned for decades. It's the reason Republicans are trying to get the most innocuous boy love Mangas banned from schools and purging queer books from school libraries.

It's the reason fundamental Christians burned HP books in the late 90s and early 00s, and eschew even Disney movies for mention of magic today. It's the reason for the Satanic Panic and the idiotic fear around D&D and heavy metal music causing Devil worship and video games causing violence, all of which has been long since disproved. It's the reason there were groups of panicked mothers nation wide protesting the band KISS and why Fox News lost their minds over 2 seconds of blue alien side boob in Mass Effect.

It's the reason that every single public fanfiction archive before Ao3 got purged of anything queer whether it was adult content or just two teens confessing their feelings. The reason even heterosexual erotica, the most popular published genre, got banned or purged. It's the reason for the Tumblr and DeviantArt porn and erotica art ban. It's the reason Ao3 has a team of lawyers and has faced multiple online attacks over the last few years.

The same reason people in less tolerant countries are legitimately terrified of their fiction preferences being found out. It's the same bloody reason Salman Rushdie has a 3 million pound price on his head and lost an eye only 2 years ago to an assassination attempt.

Noticing a pattern of extremism that has its roots in religious "purity" culture managing to trickle into even the most insular of fandom communities isn't a misuse of the term purity culture. It's a complete understanding of its give an inch, and it'll take a mile mentality. Most "proshippers" if not all, are simply advocates for freedom in expression in fiction, usually because its a reflection of the health of a community and a nation's/culture's embrace of the principles of freedom of speech. When we notice an uptick in witch hunts over, of all things, fiction of more fiction, we aren't fear mongering to call it out, we're acting as canaries in a coal mine against something that we've seen invade our spaces over and over and over again and are trying to stop it.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[t3a-tan]

Romantic and Hopeless (3/?)

First / Previous / Next

---

Ever since Oscar learned more about the truth of his soulmate's situation he had been doing nothing but thinking of how to help. He wasn't the type of person to sit back when someone was suffering so now he had been restless in his search for a solution. He thought about contacting the police, but he didn't want to break Rabbit’s trust.

So it all came down to him. He had been skipping school every day, spending his time searching online for whoever Zorro Ryker was. Thanks to it being a unique name it was easy to find results, but actually trying to figure out where his soulmate might be being held was a different story. In passing conversation she mentioned something about being underground, but that didn't really narrow the search.

He even spent money on some sketchy sites in order to get a hold of more information about the man… at first his results were pretty normal and uninteresting, but he noticed that by looking deeper into the darker sides of the internet, the name ‘Ryker’ appeared more often.

Zorro Ryker was a man who ran a launderette that was a surprisingly short distance away. At the same time, Ryker was a man with various connections on the dark web.

Isn't it a thing that launderettes are often a front for shadier businesses? He decided he would just go check it out, even though he was extremely nervous. The launderette was not open for 24 hours, and so he decided to wait for Sammy to say hello again to go inside, since that meant Ryker wasn't there.

He was eating at a place opposite the launderette, sitting at the window as he ate, occasionally glancing towards it.

“Hey, Fox.” There it was. Oscar's heart fluttered at the sound of her voice, feeling even more determined to go ahead with his plan. He doubted he would find her this easily, but at the very least he would get closer to doing so. Ryker might have left clues to her whereabouts after all.

Oscar glanced towards the launderette, seeing a man closing up. He fit the description of Ryker exactly, and Oscar's fist clenched at the sight. He looked away after a moment, to finish his food and to not call attention to himself.

“Hey yourself, Rabbit. Still holding up okay?” He asked as he clasped his hands together in his lap. I'm gonna get you out of there. I promise.

“Yeah. As much as I can anyway… How's your day been?” She asked back. For the past few days Oscar hadn't told her anything about his plan; not about his research or about skipping school.

“It's been alright. Mum hasn't gotten back yet, so… we'll see. Freddo came over to play some video games— he just headed out like…half an hour ago.” He responded, still not letting her in on the plan because it might just stress her out. He watched as a car pulled out from the street, seeing that Ryker was the one driving and that he was leaving fully.

I'll wait five more minutes.

He spoke to Sammy for a bit longer, before getting up from his stool and leaving the fast food place he had been waiting in, heading towards the launderette.

First, he was checking for security systems. This wasn't his first rodeo— when his mum went away for a long time when he was younger he had broken into a few Tesco Expresses at night for food. He scoped out the outside, mindful of cameras, before beginning to pick at the locked door towards the back of the shop.

Once he was in he laid low, just looking around for some kind of backroom where Ryker might be keeping information. After finding what seemed to be an office he entered, moving a bunch of books and papers around…. Until suddenly, the floor began to move.

Oscar yelped, stomach dropping as the part of the room he was standing on seemed to turn into an elevator, eyes wide with alarm. Oh god. Oh god. A secret elevator? Should I really go down?

He was nervous, mostly because of the mention that Ryker owned a gun, but he took a deep breath and stayed determined. I have to find something. She can't just stay there forever.

As the elevator arrived at its destination, Oscar walked out, looking around at the oddly high tech surroundings. It looked like…a lab. And not the meth kind. He looked around, using his phone flashlight to see and being careful not to make too much noise or leave much evidence that he had been there.

“Wait. I think he's back.” Oscar bristled as Rabbit's voice registered in his head, instinctively looking towards the elevator he came from…but it was still there. Open. Unless…she can hear me?

“Do you hear him, or see him?” He asked. No response came. She's worried she'll be heard. But is she actually here somewhere?

The lab was big, with multiple rooms, some of which were just full of files and papers, and another that had a lot of intimidating looking machines inside. He felt an odd sense of dread looking at all of it— there was something about the odd devices that felt almost alien. Some parts of them even seemed to glow in the darkness.

Most of what he tried to read was written in a language he couldn't understand, using a script he couldn't recognize. Maybe it's a cypher..? How paranoid is this guy? He sighed and threw the papers back down onto the table, continuing to look for clues.

Finally he found something that was written in English. He flipped to a random page, flicking through.

However, it's not usual that I get to have a full conversation with either of the children, so I'll take what I can get.

Children? Rabbit and her brother maybe? Oscar's gaze drifted upwards on the page to find the context.

Subject 2 has a surprising amount of agility; a finding that developed when I found him out of containment whilst I had left the lid off. He was afraid of delving further about his talents. A pity. After Subject 1 incurred her most recent injury, I notice he's been a lot more restless and anxious. Due to her infection I have been keeping them separate for now so she can heal in the best conditions, but I understand that humans are social creatures, and children especially so.

Oscar raised an eyebrow at the detached usage of the word ‘humans’, but ignored it and continued.

I allowed him some roaming under my supervision in the hopes that this would allow me to observe his agility properly and that it would cheer him up. Subject 2 is usually very quiet, clinging onto Subject 1 like a parasite, but it took a surprisingly short amount of time for him to start talking today. He told me that his favourite colour is purple, and even attempted to engage with me and ask my own. It didn't take much prompting for him to tell me why exactly purple was his favourite colour, recalling a memory from before. I was disturbed to hear that Subject 2 can no longer remember his own parent's faces. However, it's not usual that I get to have a full conversation with either of the children, so I'll take what I can get.

Reaching the part he had first read again, he paused before looking to the next page, continuing the journal entry with furrowed brows. Subject 2… Is that Rabbit's brother? This must have been written before he… He took a deep breath and continued.

It's times like these that my resolve feels the weakest. I find myself wondering; if I had just given up my research, what would they be doing now? Is what I want to achieve really worth it? It's been so long now that the fiery anger I felt and revenge I swore feels cold and ashen. I cannot stop now though. I've gone too far. I don't expect forgiveness, but I hope the children will one day make peace with what I've done. Tomorrow I believe Subject 1 can be taken off of antibiotics. She will recover, I can only hope it's swift so she and Subject 2 are not apart for too much longer. I should avoid speaking with him alone too much lest I become soft. Empathy is something the enemy lacks, and so I must too be devoid of it.

Oscar frowned as he closed the journal and set it back down where he found it. He's a bloody lunatic. Really, what situation could ever warrant kidnapping children? At least there was a hint of remorse, but Oscar couldn't fathom a sane man getting to that point in the first place. And what enemy is he even talking about?

He swallowed nervously but continued exploring the lab quietly. So far there was no sign of his soulmate.

He entered the next room, and his attention was immediately caught by something to the left of the room.

A singular glass enclosure sat on the table. Oscar slowly approached, curious to see what pet Ryker was keeping…only for his gaze to fall upon a tiny girl. She was protecting her eyes, and Oscar realised he was still pointing his phone flashlight directly at her so he lowered his phone down, mouth agape.

He could barely make out any of her features in the dark, but what little light his phone provided from it's new position told him that she had dark skin and darker hair that was cut messily to hang around her ears. At first she had been squinting against the light but as she took in his appearance her eyes suddenly widened and she scrambled back.

Is that…?

“Rabbit…” He breathed, still staring down at her from behind his sunglasses— which really weren't doing him any favours in this room. He took them off so he could see better, before crouching down to peer through the glass better. “Is…is that you?”

He received no response, but Oscar was more preoccupied with the surprise of seeing someone so small. After a few moments of staring, his soft green gaze trailing up and down her tiny form, he finally registered that he was only making the tiny girl, who may or may not be his soulmate, more nervous by the second. He bit his lip.

“Well… If you aren't her, I'm still not gonna leave you here with that monster. You'll be okay, I promise..! Not gonna hurt you…” He reached down, carefully removing the lid of the enclosure and setting it to the side. Then he began to reach into the box prison, only to pause when he saw the girl scramble back away from his hand in fear.

Is this really Rabbit? Surely Rabbit would know I'm not a threat?

“No no no— I'm here to help, see? I'm not…like that guy keeping you. My name is Oscar. I'm gonna get you out of here…” He was hesitant to actually grab or touch the tiny person whilst she seemed so afraid. As nervous as he was, and as much as he wanted to leave as soon as possible, he had no idea what this tiny person had been through…but if it was like Rabbit, then he could understand why she was so afraid.

“Shhh…come on. I can't stay here… I know you're scared, but that monster isn't going to touch you again. H-here uh…” He turned off his phone flashlight, bringing it into the enclosure so that it was flat beside her. “You can climb on this so I don't have to touch you? You'll have to go in my pocket though when we leave the building.”

Slowly, and clearly with a lot of willpower, she climbed onto the back of his phone. Oscar could see her shaking from here and his heart clenched with sympathy. He had no idea what this person had been through, but it must have been a lot for them to get so small. Is this really Rabbit? She's not saying anything… she could be in shock.

“Easy…” He lifted the phone slowly, bringing it towards his chest pocket and holding it steady. “Hop in, and then we can leave. It's gonna be okay… I'll help you.”

It felt like his heart was beating out of his chest with anxiety as he waited. Every second that passed could be a second that Ryker would return. So far, if this wasn't Rabbit, Oscar had seen no other sign of her or clues to her whereabouts.

He watched as the tiny girl slipped into his pocket, marvelling slightly at how she disappeared entirely within it. He turned his flashlight back on, putting on his sunglasses, and began to walk towards the elevator again.

“We're in the elevator now, okay? Almost out. I'll take you back to my place for now, but I promise I'll help you find a way to get back to normal.” He assured, fingers tapping anxiously at the front pockets of his jeans as he waited for the elevator to reach the launderette again.

He didn't lock the door behind him, simply focused on getting home so he could fully focus on and speak to the tiny person he had found. She understandably wasn't very talkative for now, but he hoped when she realised he was safe she would be more willing to speak. He still needed to find out if she was Rabbit or not.

The winter air was cold and Oscar shivered slightly before looking down at his pocket.

“I'm gonna put my jacket on, so it'll get dark, okay? Still not gonna hurt you…” He explained softly as he started zipping his jacket up. Hearing no protest he zipped it the rest of the way. “It’s gonna be okay. Almost home.”

He placed his hands into his jacket pockets, fidgeting anxiously with the seams inside as he walked, looking around every now and then, worried he was being followed by Ryker. Once he was certain that the monstrous man wasn't there at all he let out a sigh of relief, his breath visible in the cold evening air.

You're gonna be okay. I promise.

[tinybabiebear]

cheap stores to find agere objects!

in person

dollar stores

often in dollar stores you can find a specific baby section with low-priced baby objects! though sometimes there are objects that only specifically babies can use, there are some agere friendly objects as well!! some of the things you can usually find here are:

- teethers

- sippy cups

- baby powders / lotions

- bath toys

- baby toys / blocks / rings

- stuffed animals

- hair bows / accessories

- rattles

- off-brand bigger kid toys

- colouring books + crayons

2. walmart , target, etc

though this can be less cheap than places such as dollar stores, there’s often either more options or more on-brand objects here. here you can find toys and themed objects for kids from popular tv shows, or branded stuffed animals. there’s a variety of options for many different agere age ranges! some of the things you can usually find here are:

- baby bottles ( be careful of the teet )

- sippy cups / themed sippy cups

- kid cups

- teddy bears / stuffed animals ( of shows and other popular brands )

- dolls / barbies / trucks / etc

- bigger kid toys & popular brand toys

- baby lotion / powder / oil

- baby food ( either the squeeze type / liquid or puffs! )

- teethers / ice teethers

- pacifiers ( i wouldn’t recommend, they will hurt your teeth ! )

- security blankets

- kids plates

- baby / kids books

online

etsy

etsy can be tricky! a lot of the time there are shops that aren’t sfw, which isn’t always comfortable or available for minors under the age of 18! if you’re uncomfortable with that, make sure to add ‘ sfw ‘ and ‘ agere ‘ to your searches, aswell as checking description boxes of either the listing or the shop in specific. also watch the shipping on certain listings as they can be very expensive ! some of the things i often find myself searching for and you can find here are:

- adult bottles with adult nipples ( this means that you can use them without hurting your teeth as much! ) / these can also be themed towards shows and characters aswell as have themes in general!

- adult pacifiers ( these can also hurt your teeth much less and are safer to use! )

- baby hat / mitt / boots in adult size

- adult onesies

- baby sensory cubes

- sensory objects ( chewies, sensory books, fidget toys, etc! )

- adult diapers / training pants ( make sure to be extra careful with brands if you’re uncomfortable with not sfw shops!! also, make sure to be very careful with sizes as sometimes these can be sized weird. )

- adult length pacifier clips

- adult sized bibs

- bloomers

- rattles & stuffed animals

2. amazon

amazon is a limited place for specific agere products but it has a wide variety for baby products in general! not only this, but their shipping is often very discreet and also fast + inexpensive! keep in mind shops that aren’t sfw again if you’re uncomfy with that! some shops that are popularly available on amazon are: LFB, rearz, landofgenie, etc. some products you can find here are:

- adult onesies

- adult pacifiers

- adult bottles

- adult bibs

- sippy cups + cutlery, plates, cups, etc

- stuffed animals, rattles + sensory

- adult diaps / cloth diaps

- teethers / ice teethers

- baby powder/lotion

- bibs

- adult pacifier clips

- fidget toys / toys / dolls, fandom/theme plushies + toys

- footed jammies

- changing pads

- overalls

- colouring books

- play tents

- mobiles + crib accessories

- DS + DS games

- leapfrog toys

- accessories ( ex: boys, headbands, clips, necklaces, etc )

- bubble bath / bath toys

- night lights

- long socks / paw socks

3. aliexpress

make sure to be careful here!! you can find most things that you’d be able to on amazon here, but make sure whatever you buy has reviews!! if not, it’s easy to get scammed. not only this, but it takes a long time to ship!

4. shein

shein is probably the most limited out of these options! you can find more discreet things here rather than more open things! some things you can find here + what to search for to find them are:

- onesies! i often use the words ‘ bodysuit / t-shirt bodysuit ‘

- cute water bottles!! sometimes you can find sippy cups here but they take a bit of searching for! ‘ cute water bottle / kids water bottle / sippy cup ‘ usually work!

- thigh / knee high socks!

- overalls

- nightlights

- fidget toys / stuffed animals

[feyrescourt]

This is a long and rambly discussion post for elriel nation btw so strap in

I want to preface this by kindly asking the elriel hive to not use any tags of #those ships if reblogged. I want to keep this in the elriel echo chamber. Please and thank u!

A huge part of fandom culture is to ship canonically compliant characters and crack ships. Everyone’s got them, and it’s totally normal, and it’s usually fun to engage with.

The majority of the time I have no issue with this (I am a wolfstar shipper and even though there is canonical evidence of them in the original HP books, they’re widely accepted online and balked at IRL usually due to homophobia and #that nasty, nasty woman’s bigotry), but over the last few years a certain group of crack shippers have taken it upon themselves to fly a little too close to the sun, and want to make it our (elriels) problem. I am talking about the Glees.

It’s late and this just popped into my head so I want to rant about it.

My friend who got me into ACOTAR gave me a breakdown of the ships (bc I read ToG first and went in blind. I became a doraelin shipper very early on and remained one halfway through QoS, it was a whole thing when I realized they were not end game lol), bc I asked her to after my ToG experience. She told me all the characters names and then told me about feysand and nessian endgames but didn’t mention az or elain’s situation. I asked her about it and she told me that she didn’t want to mention much about Az because “by the end of the series azriel has two options for how his story could go, elain or another way”. She shared some anti elain sentiment with me because she’s “boring and doesn’t do anything”. That went in one ear and out the other with me tbh.

When I started acowar, and feyre returned to the night court, I saw how elain and azriel were interacting and I concluded that mor was the second LI of az bc of acomaf. I was not apart of the fandom online at this point, so I was genuinely in the dark about everything around these two. I was just reading and talking to my friend about what I read. I also want to add that I still liked L*cien at this point in the series (it changed in acofas, I became apathetic towards him rather quickly when I finished reading that whiny ass convo with feyre…..I don’t play when it comes to her) but wasn’t sold on eluce because they had like one interaction and it wasn’t a great intro to a ship.

However this first meeting in acomaf….. :)

‘Can you truly fly?’ He set down his fork, blinking. I might have even called him self-conscious. He said, ‘Yes. Cassian and I hail from a race of faeries called Illyrians. We’re born hearing the song of the wind.’ ‘That’s very beautiful,’

“Rhys chuckled, Cassian’s wrath slipping enough that he grinned, and Elain, noticing Azriel’s ease as proof that things weren’t indeed about to go badly, offered one of her own as well.”

Well imagine my surprise when I finished acowar and it turns out mor (the person az has crushed on for 500 years) comes out to feyre before the book ends and she explains that she can never love az the way he loves her. After three books, and everything that happens in acowar it was clear to me that elain and azriel were being set up as each others love interests, despite the mating bond with l*cien.

After Acofas I was officially on the elriel train. I mean…

“Azriel strode to the lone window at the end of the room and peered into the garden below.”

“Azriel emerged from the sitting room, a glass of wine in hand and wings tucked back to reveal his fine, yet simple black jacket and pants. I felt, more than saw, my sister go still as he approached. Her throat bobbed.”

“But Azriel only took Elain’s heavy dish of potatoes from her hands, his voice soft as night as he said, ‘Sit. I’ll take care of it.’ Elain’s hands remained in midair, as if the ghost of the dish remained between them. With a blink, she lowered them, and noticed her apron. ‘I—I’ll be right back,’ she murmured, and hurried down the hall before I could explain that no one cared if she showed up to dinner covered in flour and that she should just sit.”

“Elain swept in, apron gone and hair rebraided. ‘Please don’t wait on my account,’ she said, taking the seat at the head of the table.”

“He [Azriel] was the portrait of relaxed, an arm braced against the carved mantel, his wings tucked in loosely, a faint grin on his face and a glass of wine in his hand. He slid his hazel eyes toward my sister without him moving an inch.”

“Azriel and Elain remained in the sitting room, my sister showing him the plans she’d sketched to expand the garden in the back of the town house, using the seeds and tools my family had given her tonight. Whether he cared about such things, I had no idea.”

(Damn the more I read elriel’s acofas moments the more I can’t help but conclude that they just hate/don’t understand introverts 😭)

Before I started SF, I decided to look at the online fandom and bitch……my jaw hit the floor with all the elain/elriel hate I saw on TT. And everyone was talking about a newer character in SF, and I was seeing the glee fan art and was like oh shit ok maybe elriel isn’t endgame.

Fast forward to SF……

‘What happened to Elain?’

“Nesta saw the blow land, like a physical impact, in Elain’s face, her posture. No one spoke, though shadows gathered in the corners of the room, like snakes preparing to strike. Elain’s eyes brightened with pain.”

……and I’m thinking ok, az obviously likes her. Then comes az’s BC. When I finished the elriel portion of the BC I was actually crying bc I was like oh fuck I really love these two….I knew it was over for me, and I was freaked out bc I thought I was going to get got with this “new ship” involving az. Plus I was thinking about elain being left alone in the dark without any explanation and feeling like an idiot for finally showing her true feelings towards him😭. It was like 3AM when I read it so I was hyper emotional lol. But then I read the rest of the BC and was still confused because I didn’t see any romantic subtext with g/wyn. I read it and saw a hurt male who couldn’t stand what he had done to elain the night before, was pissed at his brother for stopping it and making him feel bad when he was finally willing to voice what he’s been feeling for the past year or so and hating that he was shut down because we know he never voices his emotions, and couldn’t bear keeping a gift he picked out specifically for her. A necklace…..for solstice……Then I finished SF as a whole, and still, was confused as to why glee is a ship. Nearly all of their conversations were centered around training, and Sarah didn’t use any descriptors in their encounters that elude to any romance or mutual interest. (Btw I have a whole take on rhys’ part in that BC and I think a lot of ppl are dense and don’t understand what he was going through in that book but I can save that for another time)

Cassian and Feyre have more chemistry than those too lol.

I then talked to my friend about the these ships (elriel, eluce, and glee) ((i didn’t talk about eluce much in this post but that’s a lifeless ship too. I mean…..she can’t stand that red head anyway soooo)), and I said “I’m an elriel through and through. Idc that eluce are claimed to be mates you can tell she does not like him. also glee makes no sense to me.” Not verbatim but you get the point. My friend is very sensible so by the end of our convo, she told me that she’ll accept whatever way Sarah goes and that she’ll give elain a chance when her book comes out.

But isn’t that what all of this shit is about in the end: unjustified dislike/distain/hate for elain? That’s certainly how is appears to me. You cannot look me in the eyes and tell me that you love elain if you ship her with a male whom she has expressed, on multiple occasions, zero interest in AND becomes a shell of herself when he’s around because she just doesn’t want to interact with him. (I want to reiterate that I don’t hate L, I don’t think he’s awful or anything. elain just doesn’t want to know him. And that’s her right.) The glees don’t like her bc she doesn’t fit their stereotype for what they want in an FMC and therefore, for azriel. Which is why they have been chirping that the next book will be azriel’s. Not elain’s….WHAT??? You sound fucking crazy. The eluces (even though they claim they like her) dislike her so much that they go on and on about how she needs to grovel and apologize to the male they like because HE deserves to be happy……the same male who she associates with one of the most traumatic days of her life. Who also has not apologized to her for the part he played in that day, but I digress.

I say all that to point out that Glee specifically is in the crack ship category. No canonical evidence in the text can be used to claim they are ‘mates’ or endgame or anything more than acquaintances. And that’s fine, but don’t act as though they’re to be taken seriously as a canon ship when there’s no evidence to support it. Don’t boldly claim that azriel “has two love interests” when he literally doesn’t. He can’t sleep because of elain. He can’t stop thinking about her. He’s short with his family and others around him the days and weeks following solstice. His shadows threaten to strike nesta when she hurts elain and causes her pain. He doesn’t assign his spies to watch L*cien in acofas because he doesn’t want to know if he’s trying to court elain. He goes full lethal when he hears she may have been hurt. He follows the sound of her laugh to see what caused it. He goes on a suicide mission to save her. They communicate through looks alone when their family is around. Have you read an SJM book before? This is how she sets up her relationships. Like, holy fuck.

You cannot claim elriel is a crack ship because they have had background build up that both FMCs in their respective books have noticed and commented on. Cassian has noticed it too DESPITE not being hyper aware of what’s going on with az in SF. (referencing the scene in SF where elain tells everyone at family dinner about nesta’s love for dancing and the ball story from when they were human).

This ship war shit is fucking crazy because really this should only be between elriel nation and the eluces. Anyway, I’m over dealing with the fever dream brigade and their hallucinations. They’re going to come crashing down like Icarus when the elriel bible release day arrives and all our suffering will finally come to an end.

Then after that I’ll need to defeat the tamlin redemption arch threats, bc that is not a claim, that’s a fuckin threat and I won’t stand for it. But let’s tackle one problem at a time.

Pink: side notes/thoughts that give more context to my points

Blue italics: convos I’ve had being referenced

Purple: elriel moments <3

[amomentsescape]

Slashers Creating a Personal Carnival for Reader

Background: Reader becomes overstimulated from loud noises, but still wants to experience what it's like to go to the carnival and have fun. The Slashers want to help make this dream a reality for them.

A/N: This was a personal request I received through my messages. They asked to remain anonymous for this, but I hope they and everyone else enjoys!

Freddy Krueger

This man can literally turn the world into whatever he wants

So the night before, when you expressed how disappointed you were that you couldn't go to the town carnival, Freddy knew what to do

He always wants to make you smile, so seeing that frown was a big no in his book

He took time to plan out what he wanted to do while you were awake during the day

But that night when you went to sleep, you were shocked to find yourself in your very own carnival

There was no one else around, but you could smell the cotton candy in the air and feel the grass beneath your feet

Freddy popped up beside you with a wide smile

"Surprise!"

He then took you through everything you wanted to do

The games had every plushie you adored in multiple sizes and colors

Every ball you threw and every pin you knocked down barely made a sound

He even took you on a rollercoaster and sat beside you

There was a little wind on your skin, but the coaster remained quiet and didn't jostle you around like a normal one would

It was like he knew exactly what you needed in that moment

The night ended with you sharing some fair food together on a bench, the bright lights still dazzling around you

Michael Myers

He didn't quite understand why you were so upset at first

He thought carnivals were overrated and never had a desire to go to one himself

But he could see that sad look in your eye when you expressed your disappointment

You were the only person he actually cared about, so he knew he needed to do something to help you

The next morning, you went downstairs to the smell of popcorn

You could see that things had been changed around in the living room once you were there

There was an old fashioned popcorn maker in the corner

And next to it was an even older skee ball machine

Michael was standing beside them, just looking at your reaction

A huge smile grew on your face at the sight

Michael wasn't one to be sentimental, so the fact that he went out of his way to get these things for you meant a lot

He watched you play skee ball a couple of times before you dragged him over to play with you

He was surprisingly good for having not played before

After a couple more rounds, he pulled out a plushie of your favorite animal

It was a little dirty, but you can tell he probably looked high and low for it

He then sat you down on the chair in front of the TV and put on one of those roller coaster videos from online

You laughed at the video, enjoying hearing all the sounds and seeing the sky

But then the chair started to move in unison to the video, Michael squatting down and shifting it back and forth beside you

You ended the day off sharing popcorn together on the couch, listening to fair music from the TV

Jason Voorhees

The child in him can understand where you are coming from

He also used to want to go to carnivals, but he never felt comfortable doing so because of everyone teasing him

So now knowing that also want to experience what a fair is like, Jason felt motivated to make it a reality

You and him spending time together alone? Perfection, in his eyes

Plus, the woods are the perfect place to do this

Later that afternoon, Jason came inside and ushered you out the door to your confusion

But once outside, you saw an old roller coaster seat, a couple bags of cotton candy, a few small plushies, and an old basketball hoop

You looked at Jason confused before he handed you a basketball, watching you intently

You took a few moments to think about what to do before throwing the ball at the hoop, making it in right away

Jason walked over quickly and picked up one of the plushies, handing it to you

You began to laugh when you realized what he was doing

He quickly sat you in the roller coaster seat and began to move it around, imitating turns and bumps

This made you laugh even harder as he worked so hard to make it feel like an actual ride

You eventually had him sit beside you as you ate some cotton candy, telling Jason how much fun you had and how much you loved what he did for you

Thomas Hewitt

Thomas has also never been to a carnival before

But you explaining what they're supposed to be like and everything made him want to go with you

But he understands how they can become sensory overload

They'd probably be too much for him to handle too

So why not bring the carnival to you instead?

You woke up in the morning to the backyard being all decked out

There were bags on candy and plushies on a table next to a balloon "popping" game

Thomas was super proud of himself for building the game just for you

He took your hand and led you over to everything

He watched you bounce a small ball on a few balloons, handing you a plushie afterwards

(Having the ball bounce was his way of popping the balloons without the loud sound)

He even managed to bounce a couple himself

He also shared some candy with you in between rounds of playing

Thomas eventually took you back inside to the living room where he had a basket and a fan hooked up

He sat you down inside and turned on the fan, letting it blow on you

He then began to push the basket around on the floor, leading you all over the place in the living room

All that could be heard were your giggles throughout the house

Bubba Sawyer

As fun as carnivals sounded, Bubba never really got to go to one either

But all he knew was that you wanted to go but was upset that you couldn't because of the sensory stimulation

So Bubba decided to stay up all night, building what he could out of scrap metal and wood he had around the house

He managed to rig up a game where you tried to knock glass bottles over

He also built a little wooden stand where you could "purchase" snacks and drinks

He even dug a small path in the ground for a small basket to follow

When he excitedly dragged you outside the next morning, you were shocked to see everything

He hurriedly gave you a ball and motioned for you to knock down the pins

He then rewarded you with a plushie even if you didn't get them all down

He offered you candy, gave you big hugs, and even tried to "win" you extra plushies

The day ended with him pushing you in the basket along the dug out path, winding around the yard and making you smile in delight

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms had been to his share of carnivals in the past, but he hates seeing that frown on your face since you haven't done the same

He doesn't like leaving the house of course, but he does the best that he can

He makes each piece of furniture in the house a different ride for you

He even raids the pantries for extra snacks and foods that he thinks you'll like

And his old stuffed animals? The perfect prizes for winning some games!

He waits until the night, waking you up from your sleep to take you downstairs

He adjusted the lighting so it was a little darker, but this made everything else stand out

He put on some music on the record player as he took you on all the rides, giving you hugs from behind

And although they weren't quite traditional fair games, he did the best he could with his parent's old pool table, setting up different plastic cups to knock down

And every plushie you won was a memory for Brahms, which made it even more special

Although a little selfish, he can be quite romantic when he wants to be

Norman Bates

He can't bear to see you cry like this

He'd love to go to the carnival with you, but he also wants to see you comfortable and happy

He decides to close the motel for the day- anything for you was worth it

And after breakfast, you were surprised to see that each motel room had been turned into something different

Some had different games in them

Others had sweets and fair food

And one even had your own little rollercoaster, the TV playing a ride POV for you

You about jumped in his arms when you saw everything

You excitedly grabbed his hand and pulled him along to each room, making sure that he played and ate alongside you the whole time

It wouldn't have been the same if he wasn't at the carnival with you

Your favorite was the rollercoaster though, loving how he stayed close to your side as he moved the "ride" around in unison to the TV

Everything was perfect

And Norman reserved the last room as a little resting area, cuddling up next to you on the bed and asking how you liked everything

He thinks that maybe he should do this again in the future

Billy Loomis

With the carnival coming to town, Billy could immediately tell that something was wrong

When you told him about your disappointment, he wiped away your tears and told you it would be okay

A couple days later, you were at the empty town fair with Billy

All it took were a couple threats from "Ghostface" to the police station for the residents to not show up that day to the carnival

He toured you around for a bit, showing you all the food and rides

And when you were ready, you guys ended up trying out some of the games

He let you pick out whatever plushie you wanted and he got it down for you

He also sat in the rollercoaster cart with you, letting you experience what it was like to be in one with him without all the loud noises and craziness that usually come with the ride

And he happily hopped into a couple different food trucks, pretending to be a worker and asking for your order

It was probably the best date you've had with Billy so far

Stu Macher

Stu despises seeing you upset about anything

He'd go to the lengths of the earth to keep you smiling

So when he told you to come over to his place for date night, you were shocked to see your own mini carnival inside his living room

All of your favorite foods and drink were set out on the table

And he even made his own version of the pin game you'd normally see at carnivals

He may have stolen some of the "winnable" plushies however

But it's the thought that counts in his book

The fact that he did all of this for you was enough to make you cry

He happily took your hand and led you over to everything, explaining what he did and how you both were going to have so much fun

He even made a couple cut outs in a large box he had, allowing both of you to fit in the "rollercoaster" ride

He tried mimicking the actual ride by making funny noises and putting his hands in the air, shaking the box around with you in it

He may have knocked you both over a couple of times, but it was still fun either way

Eric Draven

You're sad about not being able to go to the carnival?

Well lucky for you, Eric has access to his share of empty rooftops, giving you plenty of room to have fun

He spent a couple of nights piecing together different games and foods that he thought you would like

He even bought a few different strings lights to give off that colorful experience you'd see at an actual fair

He waited until the middle of the night once the city was asleep to take you onto the rooftop with him

It was honestly so pretty

The lights, the gentle music, and the cool feeling of the night air was perfect

Your carnival visit was very relaxing too

You played some games together, Eric insisting that he had to play a few rounds in order to win you a plushie

And to your surprise, he "won" you the stuffed animal you had been eyeing in the store a week ago

And any fair food you've wanted to try? Eric somehow has it for you

You both ended the night sharing cotton candy and looking out over the quiet city together, your head resting on his shoulder