#The Falcon and the Winter Soldier One Shot

[blog-of-a-multitude-of-fandoms]

Snow- Bucky Barnes

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Characters: Bucky Barnes

Warnings: N/A

Request: Wattpad- "Don't you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!"

Word Count: 490

Author: Charlotte

You had a great love for the snow.  Growing up you had always had a white Christmas and the whole of winter was usually filled with varying levels of snow. Once you reached adulthood you had moved around and ended up moving in with your boyfriend, Bucky, on the other side of the country and had since not had snow. You loved your life, but you had wanted a few snowflakes at least once a year but for the couple of years that you had lived there, the winter was mild and bland- this year it changed.

It was a few days off of Christmas when you were woken up early by your boyfriend, insisting that you looked out of the window. You threatened to throw him out of it for waking you up so early, but you did as you were told and pulled open the curtains. You didn’t know what you were expecting but you were shocked to see a thick sheet of snow across everything outside whilst more continued to fall.

“It snowed,” you grinned.

“Heavily,” he added.

You didn’t have time to continue the conversation. Still in your pyjamas you grabbed a thick jumper and pulled it on and grabbed your winter boots before putting on your hat, scarf and gloves. You shouted at Bucky to do the same, but he already knew that you would want to be out in the snow so was already getting ready.

The crunch of the snow under your boot sent a shiver down your spine as you headed out to just stand in the falling snow. You span around to show you childish grin to your boyfriend who had now joined you out in the front garden of your home.

“It’s so amazing,” you smiled walking around, just enjoying the sound of the snow under foot.

Bucky laughed at you until he noticed you start to wipe your gloved hand along the garden wall. He paused, not sure if you were just brushing off the snow but as you began to clump it together, he knew that things weren’t going to go well. You shot him a devilish smile raising the snow in your hand.

“Don’t you date throw that snowba-“ Bucky’s words were cut short by the snow colliding with his face. “Goddammit.”

You laughed maniacally as you saw his expression shift and knew he was not going to let you get away with that.

“Do you think this is funny?” He asked, wiping the snow from his face.

You nodded your head. “You are the winter soldier.”

“You’re going to regret this,” he stated.

He quickly grabbed some snow and launched it in your direction. The two of you continued to throw snow back and forth, laughing terribly until he ultimately won the battle, forcing an apology from you even though both of you knew there was no sincerity to it, and you would do it again.

[whitexwolfxx310]

|| What’s Your Favorite Scary Movie? ||

Pairing: Bucky x female reader

Summary: After accidentally revealing that you have a masked man kink, Bucky starts taking it to the next level.

Warnings: Smut- MDNI please!, oral sex (both ways!!), edging?, masturbation (F), praise kink, cursing, light stalking, breaking in, harassing texts/calls, and lots of angst.

Word Count: 4.3

A/Ns: Hi babes! This was going to be a short story but she came out kinda long, so I'm going to make it a 2 parter. Don't judge me 🙈 I looove masked men. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it. This is also my first time getting more explicit with smut so don't judge me too harshly! xoxo

Snuggled up to Bucky under a comfy blanket with a bowl of extra buttery and salty popcorn, lights turned all the way down, you finally convinced him to watch the movie Scream. While you’ve seen it many times before and are aware of all the jump scares, you still cling onto him a little extra tight in preparation while he is completely unphased. About halfway through the movie, you hear Bucky snort.

“What?” You ask, looking up at him slightly. His face is illuminated by the glow of the tv.

“Something you want to tell me, Doll?” One side of his mouth is tugged up in amusement.

“Bucky, what the fuck are you talking about?” Confused, you sit up to look at him.

He just shakes his head, grinning, “I’m talking about how every time a masked man comes on that screen,” he points to the tv, “you press those pretty little thighs of yours together.”

Your cheeks instantly flush, “You noticed that?”

“I pay attention to everything when it comes to my girl.” Bucky leans back more, resting his arm on top of the couch still grinning, “Tell me about it.” His eyes narrow slightly, something a bit darker lurking, intrigued by this knowledge.

“I don’t know… it’s just like,” you brush your hair behind your ears suddenly feeling embarrassed, “kind of like a kink? A fantasy maybe? There’s just something so dark and exhilarating about an unknown man behind a mask that stalks and is obsessed with you. The anonymity of it I guess?”

By the time you’re done explaining, your hands unknowingly gripped and crossed your chest. Blinking rapidly, you let go and focus back on Bucky who is just watching you intensely.

He nods and purses his lips lightly, “Maybe if I keep watching this movie, I’ll want a masked man for myself,” He teases.

“Oh, shut the fuck up!” You grab a fistful of popcorn and throw it at him, sending you both into a laughing frenzy.

"You're cleaning that up, not me." Bucky laughs.

Him and his messes.

He scoops you in close to his body to finish the movie, and later that night he showed you that no masked man from a movie could ever compare to him.

Three weeks later.

While trying to grab your phone and keys out of your bag, you accidentally drop the stack of mail you had just picked up from the landlord’s office on the doormat.

“Shit!” You mutter to yourself. Bending down to pick it up, something catches your eye. Your apartment door is cracked open.

You stand up, discarding the mail and push open the door, “Hello?” You call out, “Bucky?” There’s no response.

Taking a few steps in, nothing looks out of place or any evidence that someone seems to have broken in. You start going through each room, keeping your phone firmly in your hand just in case. But there’s nothing. Walking out of the bedroom you decide you’re going to call Bucky to see how far away he is since he was on his way over, when you find him standing in the kitchen.

“OH! Fuck me-” You jump at the sight of him and grab your chest.

“Hey, Doll!” Bucky says, like the perfect golden retriever boyfriend that he is.

“Did you just get here?” You ask, your heart still pounding.

“Yeah, why?” he asks curiously, absentmindedly grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl off the kitchen counter and taking a bite.

“Um, yeah me too. It’s just-”

“Just… what?” He takes another bite.

“It’s just that... my door was open when I got here?”

“What?” Bucky’s face instantly changes, his eyes wide and anxious, “Go wait in the hallway until I look around.”

“I already did that-”

“Please?” He pleads as he throws out his barely eaten apple, already coaxing you towards the door.

Crossing your arms, you go and wait in the hallway while he looks around. After a few minutes he brings you back in.

“Everything looks to be fine, but I’m going to stay the night just in case.” You breathe a sigh of relief at Bucky’s words.

“Maybe maintenance came in and forgot to lock back up. I was having all those issues with my heater a few months ago,” You try justifying.

“Yeah maybe,” he says, with a small shrug of his shoulders.

About a week later is when the phone calls started.

Initially it was just 1 or 2 a day from a restricted number that you never picked up, assuming it was some kind of solicitation about your car’s extended warranty. But no voicemail was ever left.

As a few weeks went by though, it started to feel like borderline harassment. The number of phone calls jumped to an average of twenty times a day.

Sitting at your work desk your phone continued to violently vibrate, the words Unknown Caller lit up on the screen. You ran your hands through your hair, letting them linger on your scalp, starting to feel stressed every time your phone rang.

"Hey babes!" Hailee, your coworker/bff storms unannounced into your office, "You ready to grab some lu- oh my god. Are they calling you right now?" Obviously aware of the situation, she scurries around your desk in her too high heels and answers your phone. Clearing her throat, "Hi, thank you for calling Tammy's Whorehouse where we suck and fuck. How can I help you?" She taps an inpatient finger on her hip, waiting for a response and then the line goes dead.

Your hands fall down into your lap with an exacerbated breath, "No one ever answers."

"Have you tried tracking the number?" She puts the phone down and sits on top of your desk.

"I've tried calling my cell service, they can't do anything about it. If it keeps up, I just might change my number." You shake your head, "This is going to sound so dumb, but it has me so distracted. Apparently, I've been forgetting to charge my phone at night too? I swear I put it on the charger but then it dies in the night and that's why I've been late to work a few times."

Hailee tilts her head to the side, giving a sympathetic frown. "Sorry, girl. Hey!" She tries perking up, "Why don't we go get lunch and iced coffees? My treat?!" Her bright smile and shimmying shoulders get you to crack a smile. Jumping off your desk she claps her hands, "Yay!"

Suddenly there's a knock at your office door. Both of you stop the mini-iced coffee celebration and snap your attention to the nervous, uniformed teenager standing in the doorway.

"Delivery." he says shyly, looking between the two of you.

Hailee raises an eyebrow and smirks, looking you up and down, "Well, it wasn't delivered to my office."

You roll your eyes as you get up, smoothing your skirt down. Walking up to the boy, he quickly hands you a rather large bouquet of flowers. The intoxicating floral aroma hits you almost immediately, you cannot help but be astounded by the arrangement. Each individual flower is rather large, some darker than others; Ombres of red and burgundy into black.

"They're beautiful," You admire, inhaling deeply. "I don't think I've ever seen these before. Do you know what kind of flowers they are?" You ask the teen curiously.

"Black dahlia's," he recalled, and your stomach felt like it dropped with the mention of the name. "I don't think we've ever gotten a request for those at my family's shop before. That's the only reason I remember," he shrugged.

"Does Bucky have a brother? Because like, are you kidding me right now?" You glanced at Hailee who was making an over-the-top pouty face.

Asking the teen if he had CashApp to tip him, you quickly ushered him off. Searching through the flowers to see if there was a card or any indication that they were in fact from Bucky, but there wasn't.

That night, Bucky came over for dinner. He brought take out from a local Greek place that he really liked, but you were distracted. Just pushing the food around on your plate.

"You okay, doll?" His forehead puckered slightly in question.

"Yeah, um," You shake your head to try and focus, "Hey, thanks for the flowers today. That was super sweet and unexpected," considering you've been kinda stressed.

"Flowers? What flowers?" Bucky's posture stiffens.

"I got flowers delivered to me at work today, I just assumed it... was from you? Maybe it was a mistake then." There were suddenly mixed emotions being stirred around in a frenzy. If Bucky wasn't the one who sent the flowers, then who did? You tried saying they were dropped in your office by accident, but it just didn't feel right. It felt intentional.

"Well, honey, I don't know who it was, but it wasn't me." Bucky stands up from the kitchen table, grabbing his dinner plate. "Are you done?" He asks gesturing to your plate. You nod and he takes it as well, "But it's something I should do, and I'll be more conscious of it. I'm sorry,"

"No, Buck I wasn't-"

His lips press to the top of your head, "No, you're right. If anyone should be doing it, it should be me. Let me take the garbage out for you and we'll have the night to ourselves, yeah? Anything you want."

"Anything?" You repeat, in singsong with a grin.

He shakes his head, scraping the scraps from the plates into the garbage returning the grin, "I like where this is going," Tying off the bag, he holds up two fingers, "give me two minutes," he opens the door to the apartment and starts jogging down the hallway, "two minutes!!" you hear him call out.

The door to the apartment doesn't even fully shut before you hear the familiar buzz coming from your bag. Letting out an annoyed sigh, you angrily push away from the table and stomp over to the counter, dumping out your purse just to see Unknown Caller lit up on your phone.

You hit the green button so hard it doesn't register, so you do it again until it answers, "Hello?! What the FUCK do you want?!" No answer. But this time, you can hear someone breathing heavily. "You need some help. Seriously, leave me the fuck alone!" Hanging up, you slam the phone down onto the counter.

"Doll?" Bucky asks from the doorway, he sighs, "Was it that number bothering you again?"

"Yes!" You answer, flustered. "The next step is to just- change my number! I don't know what else to do."

Bucky steps in, closing in the door behind him with the back of his boot. His lips are pressed in tight line, "C'mere, darlin'," he holds his arms wide open, eyes soft. Dragging your feet, you meet him halfway and lay your head on his chest, "It's gonna be okay," he coos in your ear. "It's just some asshole with nothing better to do. They'll get bored soon enough. Worst case, we'll change your number. We can even go down to the store tomorrow and get you a new phone?" Bucky offers, trying to be optimistic as he caresses your arms up and down.

"I was just really hoping it wouldn't get to that point." You admit, pulling away from his chest just enough to look up at him.

"We'll do what we have to." Bucky smiles, cupping your chin between his thumb and pointer finger before pressing his lips to yours.

Letting your lips linger a moment as your eyes close, you inhale deeply, taking in the cypress scented soap still lingering on his skin from a shower he took earlier. It's your favorite. Hence why you keep buying it every time he runs out. Bucky's lips separate yours, and when just the tips of your tongues connect, a barely audible whimper escapes your mouth.

Like a gun starting a marathon, it was all Bucky needed to hear. Reaching down and gripping behind your thighs, he hoists you up. With a delighted squeak, you wrap your legs around his torso, laughing but keeping your lips on his as your hands run through his short hair. Using one hand flat against your lower back to keep you pressed into his chest, Bucky's other hand firmly grasped your ass. His fingers purposefully grazing the inseam of your jeans between your legs as he walked towards the bedroom.

Bucky sits on the edge of the bed, keeping you both upright. You break the mashing of tongues to re-adjust your position and straddle him. Leaning in, you suck his bottom lip into your mouth, letting your teeth graze just a tiny bit before letting go. Bucky exhales a drawn out, low groan before licking his lips. The look in his eyes is absolutely carnal as he tugs your shirt over your head and throws it across the room. Not even bothering with your bra, he just pulls the black lace cups down beneath your breasts, propping them up in exposure as he dips down to flick his tongue across your nipple.

Initially it makes you shudder, but as he continues to suck, nibble, lick, repeat, you find reprieve in grinding your hips down into the ever-growing bulge in his pants. Bucky lets out a stifled groan before switching his mouth to your other nipple. You smirk to yourself; you just love to tease this man. Although, if we're being honest, this isn't so easy on you right now either.

Roughly gripping both sides of his face, you bring his lips back to yours. You’re starting to feel needy for more of his touch. Becoming desperate to relieve this fuel lit fire. Bucky’s hands were firmly placed on each of your ass cheeks, assisting your already rolling hips forward and back. He snakes one hand between your bodies, slipping it down the front of your pants, his finger sliding once between your slit. You both moan loudly in unison into the kiss.

"Fuuuck..." Bucky breathed, tilting his head back just slightly that your lips pull apart. "You're already so fucking wet for me," his lascivious eyes lock onto yours, his breathing already becoming rather ragged.

Hearing his debauched voice, knowing just that single glide of his finger has him aching so badly, has ignited a new spark in you. "It's all yours, baby," you purred. Biting the bottom corner of your lip, you slowly get off his lap. Hooking each of your pointer fingers into the front pockets of Bucky's jeans, you encourage him to stand up as you drop to your knees before him.

As he's fumbling with the button and zipper, you stare up at him with tantalizing eyes, your hands firmly grazing along his muscular thighs. Once he's able to get it open, you help start to shimmy down his jeans and boxer briefs passed his hips until they pool on the floor. Bucky's thick, long cock springs up at almost eye level in enthusiasm, instantly making your mouth water. Sticking your tongue out as far as you possibly can, you lock eyes with Bucky and press the tip to your tongue, dragging it to a flick.

Sucking in a breath through his teeth, his body quivered at the first contact. You smile as you taste the initial saltiness on your tongue, licking your lips before hollowing out your cheeks and taking him into your mouth. Bucky exhales deeply, his head starting to tilt back but he stops, making sure he maintains eye contact with you. You draw back, pressing your tongue upward firmly, go forward, and go back again. After a moment, a rhythm gets going, you now move your tongue side to side as you bob front to back, sucking harder.

"That's it," Bucky coaxes, "That's my good fucking girl," a small whimper escapes your throat at his words of praise. You clamp your legs together a little tighter as it's getting harder to ignore the incessant throbbing and growing wet spot between your legs.

The next thing you know, his hands are in your hair, gathering it up into a makeshift ponytail. Grasping his shaft with your hand steadily, you use that to guide your mouth, twisting and gliding easily. You know it's his weakness. Bucky's hips start to buck up into your mouth as he pulls your head down further onto his throbbing cock. Through now teary eyes you’re determined to watch as his face starts to contort with pleasure, his moans music to your ears just as your gagging is to him.

"You look...Ahh...so...fucking...pretty," Each word comes out with a drive of his hips into your mouth. In the dim lighting of the room, completely blissed out on pleasure, he looks like a fucking god. And he's mine. The thought alone is enough to make you explode. "Ugh!" Bucky growls, "I can't take it anymore! C'mere!" With a small 'pop', he pulls out and grabs underneath your arms and tosses you onto the bed.

Giggling, you wipe the excess saliva off your swollen, red lips as you push back further onto the bed. Bucky pulls your jeans and panties down and off in one swift motion before kneeling onto the bed. His eyes are glazed over, solely focused on between your legs. He crawls upward, and it's purely feline as he dips down, his mouth creating a seal and sucking once.

The combination of a loud moan and gasp get ripped straight from your lungs as you practically convulsed off the bed from being so aroused. Bucky quickly and securely locks your thighs in place to keep them open and from you going anywhere. He grinned, watching every single movement.

"Eyes on me, princess," he ordered. Pressing down on your lips, you nodded in anticipation. Leaning in, Bucky skimmed his lips on your very inner thigh, placing a feather light kiss that made your entire abdomen tense.

Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.

"Fuck," Bucky sits back up on his knees, taking his phone out of the pocket of his jeans that was still around his ankles. "Hello?" You stare up at him in complete disbelief, "What, now?" He looks down at you on the bed, giving a sympathetic look and mouths 'sorry'. Letting out an annoyed sigh, he drags a hand down his face. "Yeah... yeah. No- I understand... Okay. Yep. I'll be there. Bye." He hangs up the phone.

"Don't say it," you bite out, crossing your arms over your chest and closing your legs.

Bucky takes a deep breath, "I have to go back, a mission came up."

"Annnd, you said it," you look up at the ceiling, refusing to keep that eye contact that you were so adamant on not even a minute ago.

"It sounded pretty important, Doll." Bucky is off the bed, pulling up his pants and re-adjusting himself in them.

"It always is," you mutter under your breath. Sighing, you just accepted the fact that your night is completely ruined. "So, what you're telling me is, that I'm getting cock blocked by The Avengers?"

Bucky sits on the bed, placing a delicate hand on your cheek, "I'm really sorry. I'll make this up to you tenfold, promise." He kisses you softly, "I have to go. I'll contact you as soon as I can. I love you," He offers a small smile.

You sigh, knowing you can never let him leave on bad terms, "I love you too, Buck." Sitting up you give him a hug and a few extra kisses that probably made him late.

Still sitting in bed after Bucky had gone, you felt irrationally irritated by how he left. Tapping on your thighs, a headache was already brewing from the pent-up sexual tension that you were unable to get out. That's when you suddenly remembered a little something on your phone that might just help you out in this situation. There was this one particular time you and Bucky decided to record yourselves having sex, and you've never went back and watched it. If there was ever a time to go back and do so...

Excitedly, you go over to the dresser. You pull open your underwear drawer and dig through all the way to the back, where you stash your favorite vibrator. You click the silicone button a few times to make sure it's charged, and all the intensity settings worked before laughing menacingly to yourself and closing the drawer. Tossing the toy onto the bed, you walk out to the kitchen.

Your phone was where you had left it earlier, still slammed face down on the counter. Sashaying over, you notice that there's an applecore sitting next to it. This is odd, because you didn't have one and Bucky is normally very meticulous when it comes to cleaning and picking up after himself. Going to throw it out, you realize there is no garbage bag in the trash can and suddenly it makes sense. Bucky was in a rush to leave; he probably didn't have the time to replace the bag. So, you do it yourself, and throw out the eaten fruit.

Getting back to your room with your phone, you notice that your underwear drawer is open. Pursing your lips and narrowing your eyes, you look from the bed, to the dresser, back to the bed. I could have sworn I closed that. Then again, maybe it's just the headache coming on. You close the dresser drawer, and all too eagerly jump under the covers.

The ambiance for a little 'self-love' right now is almost too perfect. Your bedroom is dimly lit with only a mood lamp and the fog covered streetlamps from down below your apartment. The light patter of rain hit against your bedroom window and fire escape underneath it, while some light thunder rolled some distance away.

Scrolling through your phone, it wasn't hard to find exactly what you were looking for. Pressing 'play', you're watching a side view of you taking Bucky from the back. Your mouth drops open slightly, seeing it from a third person view. Bucky has his Vibranium hand on the side of your face, pushing you down further into the mattress and he is just relentless. And the sounds, God the sounds. You grab the vibrator, turning it on and quickly placing it onto your already sensitive and swollen clit and start rubbing it and soft circles.

"Look at how good you take it,"

"Oh, God!"

"Are you gonna come for me?"

"Mhm,"

"I can't hear you, princess,"

"Can I come Bucky? Please, please let me..."

"Of course, my good girl can come. Here... lean down more...open those legs wider...touch yourself...yeah...fuck, yeah...just like that baby,"

The bed is practically shattering underneath you as Bucky, who isn't even there, coaxes you into having an orgasm with yourself. You rub the vibrator more intensely, knowing you’re about to come hard from the pent-up tension this evening. The lights surge briefly in the apartment from the passing storm, just as your head presses down further against the pillows and the ripples of pleasure aggressively take over your body.

The lights go out momentarily, and that's when you see the silhouette of a tall, dark hooded figure standing on your fire escape looking into your window.

The lights come back on a second later and you’re panting. Both from the release and from what you saw. The cognizance hits you that you just came in front of a total stranger. Oh, and maybe that I might have a stalker.

The cops came, looked around, made you feel like an idiot, took a report, and left. Not feeling comfortable staying in the apartment for the night, you called Hailee, who offered up her spare bedroom.

Sitting across from you with her legs crossed on the couch, her hair in a bonnet, a glass of wine, and blue raspberry vape, she leaned in, listening intently to the details leading up to this moment.

“Soo… you know I’m gonna ask,” she starts.

You sigh, “I don’t know when I’m going to tell Bucky. I always feel so guilty when he’s away and something happens.”

Hailee’s face scrunches as she waves her hand in dismissal, “No, no not that,” You raise an eyebrow at her in confusion. “Can I see it?” She lowers her voice, but it’s oozing with hope.

“Bitch,” both your eyebrows raise in aghast, realizing what she’s actually asking.

“What?! Come onnnn,” She whines, pressing her hands together in plead and pouts her lip.

“Oh my god, Hailee! No! Just… no.”

Rolling her eyes she composes herself again, “Okay, so like, you ever just… look at a man, and you just know?” Her hands wave around as she’s trying to explain, “Like, that man can fuck? I feel like that’s Bucky. And so…” Hailee looks so determined right now, “s-shame on you!” She points directly at you, this is comical, “for not sharing the video evidence! Because now I’m convinced you have a boring, vanilla sex life!”

Leaning back against the kitchen counter sipping your glass of water, you hear yourself coming down from the highs of ecstasy through your phone. Hailee’s wide eyes are glued, mouth dropped open, speechless, for once. The sound finally cuts off.

“Are you sure he doesn’t have a brother because-”

You quickly snatch the phone out of her hand, “Okay, you got what you wanted. Can we be serious now?!”

“Yeah,” Hailee shakes her head, “yeah, of course…” she takes a deep breath, “I’m just saying, you seriously have some career options if your current job doesn’t work out though.”

“Hailee!!”

“Okay! I’m sorry!” Her hands go up in a surrender, “but you put in a police report, and I mean, of course you can stay here. What else are you going to do?”

*Ding*

“Hang on, I just got a text.”

“Who the fuck would be texting you this late?” Hailee asks, getting off the couch to read the text with you over your shoulder.

Together you read the message:

Part 2

If you enjoyed this, please check out my masterlist

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[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Cuddling The Nightmares Away » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Pairings: Boyfriend/TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: You help Bucky through a nightmare for the first time by cuddling him.

Warnings: Fluff, language, nightmares, crying, kissing, pet names

Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Gif credit goes to the creator.

Bucky’s eyebrows were furrowed and a thin layer of sweat covered his forehead as he slept. He was mumbling something incoherent too. You could feel him tossing and turning next to you. You leaned over, turning on the bedside lamp and turned to face Bucky. You couldn’t help but notice how heavy he was breathing and it concerned you.

“Bucky?” Bucky hears your voice faintly. “Bucky?” He hears again. “Bucky?” He heard more clearly that time.

Bucky’s eyes shot open and he gasped. He scrambled to sit up. He was breathing heavily and looked around the bedroom to gather himself. Bucky jumped slightly when he felt your hand on his right shoulder.

“Are- Are you ok?” Bucky asks.

“Of course I’m ok.” You answered. “Why wouldn’t I be?” You asked.

Instead of answering you, he broke down in tears. You were quickly to wrap your arms around him and comfort him. Bucky leaned into your touch. He leaned his forehead against your chest. His tears soaked your -his- t-shirt.

“It’s ok.” You cooed, rubbing his back. “The bad dream is over.” You say softly.

“I’m so sorry, doll.” Bucky apologizes, his voice cracking.

“You have absolutely nothing to apologize for, baby.” You almost whispered.

“Yes I do.” He says.

Bucky sat up and turned himself towards you.

“The dream I had wasn’t ordinary bad dream. It was a nightmare.” He tells you. “I used to be an assassin for HYDRA called the Winter Soldier. The nightmares are about the everything I did for them.” He explains. “I have them almost every night.” He says.

“Oh, baby…” You caressed his cheek. “Why didn’t you tell me?” You asked.

“We have an amazing thing going on and I didn’t want to scare you away.” He says, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“You’ll never scare me away, Bucky. I’m with you until the end of the line.” You say softly.

Bucky smiles when you said that. Then it slowly faded away when a horrible thought popped into his mind.

“What if I hurt you?” Bucky asks, his voice cracking.

“That’ll never happen, baby.” You tell him.

“What if it does? I’ll never forgive myself and you’ll be scared of me.” He says, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Even if you did hurt me, I would know it’s an accident and I’ll forgive you for it. I won’t ever be scared of you.” You tell him softly.

You grabbed Bucky’s right hand and put it on your chest where your heart is.

“Do you feel that?” You asked. “Deep down in my heart, I’ll forgive you for anything and I’ll still love you.” You say.

A smile grew on Bucky’s face. You leaned in, kissing him sweetly and softly. His beard was wet from crying.

“I love you so much, baby boy.” You whispered, putting your forehead against his and looking deep in his blue eyes.

“I love you too, babydoll.” Bucky whispers back.

You kissed him one more time and wiped his tears away.

“I know what will make you feel better.” You say.

“What might that be, doll?” He asks.

“Cuddling the nightmares away.” You tell him.

“I would very much like that.” He says.

You two readjusted yourselves. You laid down on your back and Bucky laid his head on your chest and wrapped his arms around you protectively. One of your hands was rubbing his back while your free hand was playing with his soft brown hair. As you were reaching for the lamp to turn it off, Bucky looked up at you.

“Doll?” Bucky says.

“Yes, baby?” You asked, looking down at him.

“Can we turn the TV on?” He asks. “It helps me fall asleep.” He says.

“Of course we can.” You smiled.

You reached for the remote and turned the TV on. You put the TV on a low volume.

“What do you want to watch?” You asked.

“Anything is fine.” He answers.

You put on cartoons and put the remote back on the nightstand. Bucky didn’t mind that you put on cartoons. He finds them entertaining. You reached up and turned the lamp off and got comfortable again.

“Try to get some rest, baby boy.” You whispered, kissing the top of his head.

“I’ll try.” He says.

The sound of your heartbeat soothed Bucky and made him fall asleep. You fell asleep shortly after him.

The following morning, you managed to slide out of Bucky’s arms and went to the kitchen to make coffee and breakfast. After about an hour, Bucky stirred in his sleep and woke up to the sun shining through the curtains and the sound of the TV. He turned over to wrap his arms around you, only to find out that you weren’t in bed. Bucky stretched and rubbed his eyes before getting out of bed. He shut the TV off before walking out of yours and his bedroom. It didn’t take him long to realize you were making breakfast. The smell filled his nose instantly.

“Good morning, baby boy.” You smiled, handing him a cup of coffee as he sat down at the table. “How’d you sleep?” You asked.

“Better when you cuddled me.” Bucky answers with a smile before taking a sip of coffee.

“That’s good.” You pecked his lips softly. “I made breakfast.” You tell him.

“What did you make?” He asks curiously.

“Your favorite.” You answered with a smile, giving him a kiss on his forehead.

You went back to the kitchen to get breakfast and took it to the table. You put a plate in front of Bucky and sat down at the table next to him.

“Doll?” Bucky speaks up after a few minutes.

“Yes, babe?” You asked, looking up at him.

“Thank you for last night.” He smiles.

“You’re welcome, Bucky.” You smiled back. “You know you don’t have to thank me for that. I’ll cuddle away the nightmares anytime.” You say.

“I’m sure I’ll have less nightmares when you’re holding me.” He says with a smile.

“I love holding you and I love you.” You say, leaning over in your chair to kiss his lips sweetly and softly.

“I love you too, babydoll.” He almost whispered, kissing you back.

🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

-Bucky’s Doll

[scarfacemarston]

Bucky Barnes A-Z Fluff Alphabet!

Feel free to send in more requests for Bucky! Please think about "liking" and reblogging! These things take time. Also, I included a lot of 1940s Bucky as a comparison.

A - Affection (how do they show affection to their s/o)

Bucky has always been physically affectionate, but this changed after escaping his time in Hydra captivity. He's slowly beginning to experience positive touches again and quickly discovered how touch-starved he is, so physical touch is a significant way he shows affection, but there are days when he'll request not to be touched. He tries to be encouraging and complimentary, but he feels like it comes across as awkward and stilted. He'll try for quality time, but he does worry if he's overstaying his welcome. However, he does become less anxious as time goes on.

B - Best Friend (what are they like as a best friend?)

Look at Steve, for example! He's loyal to a fault. He will put his friend's well-being way beyond his own. He considers himself less of a decent friend than before, but he's wrong. He's just as great a friend as he used to be.  He's just as loyal and self-sacrificing. He will drop everything the moment you need help. The only reason he is ever distant is because he doesn't believe he's worthy of friendship, and his anxiety and depression get in the way. He will always doubt himself, but again, it improves in time.

C - Cuddling (do they like to cuddle? And how would they do it?)

Yes, physical touch with those he trusts is a soothing balm for him. He's always loved it when someone played with his hair, or he could hold hands, place an arm around his partner's waist - he loves it all, so loving to cuddle is really no surprise. He occasionally doesn't want to be touched, and that space is important to him, but otherwise, he'd be happy to be cuddled basically any time. It doesn't matter what position - he loves them all, but his favorite is lying on his back with your head on his chest.

D - Domestic (do they want to settle down? How good are they at cooking and cleaning)

In the 40s, he was expected to settle down at some point and probably would have in some form after the war. He still feels as though he has these expectations today, but it's more of a ghost memory than anything else. He'd be surprised that someone wants that with him - unless it's Steve. If it's Steve, he's not surprised at all and would consider it a continuation of their lives in Brooklyn. With a new partner, he can be convinced to settle down; he just wants to be sure that it's what you want. He knows how to clean and can cook simple meals, as we see in Romania. In the 30s and 40s, it was very much bachelor food like canned soup and a relatively clean, if not bare, apartment. Bucky can be a combination of messy and neat. It depends on his mental health. However, his residence is so devoid of decor that it's hard to make it messy. (This is seen with the comics as well.) He does improve when you move in with him. He enjoys cooking now in comparison to the 40s.

E - Ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He's very quiet but very gentle and kind about it. He doesn't expect you to understand why, and he is hard on himself for breaking it off. He is more likely to break it off because of his own self-doubt, but he does have boundaries that, if broken - he will break it off. He expects you to hate him afterward and understands if you do, but his mind will not change.

F - Fiancé (how do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

In the 40s, Bucky loved dating around - he wasn't a himbo, but he did enjoy pursuing different people. He didn't want to settle down yet - unless it was with Steve, which was something he didn't want to think about logistically. However, he doesn't take commitment for granted nowadays and realizes how valuable it can be. He's not sure about marriage as it's nothing he ever really thought about outside of his mother reminding him he "should" get married, but if it feels right and it's discussed, he might be convinced. 

G - Gentle (how gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Bucky is very methodological physically and emotionally speaking. He is very tender and careful, but steady physically speaking.He is especially careful with his prosthetic. Emotionally, he is stronger than one would expect. He isn't a pushover, and will defend himself or anyone else who needs defending, but he is gentler now than before he was the Winter Soldier.

H: Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) 

Once there's trust between you, yes. He loves hugs. He loved them in the 40s, and he loves them now. He definitely loves to be greeted with a hug and likes to give you a hug before he leaves somewhere, like a mission or therapy. They're very firm but gentle.

I: I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It would take Bucky a while before he said he loved you. The problem is, he either plans how he'll say it—his preference—or accidentally blurts it out in an especially tender moment and then dies of embarrassment. I would say it takes about half a year, but it really depends on your bond. 

J: Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they're jealous?)

The 1940s Bucky could get quite jealous. It wasn't a toxic masculinity thing, but it was definitely something he sometimes struggled with. He was never abusive about it, EVER, but it was something that bothered him, as seen with The First Avenger. Nowadays, he's less likely to be jealous because his confidence levels are a bit lower than before, but the more robust your bond, the more likely he is to get jealous because the two of you put so much work into it. He is definitely the type to give the death glare to end all death glares, make a snide comment, or generally find a way to stay by your side. 

K: Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you?)

It really depends on his mood, as it does with anyone. Sometimes, he can give playful kisses, peppering them all over your face as he refuses to let go, or they can be slow and tender, full of meaning and gratefulness, or they can be scorching, searing, and passionate.

L: Little Ones (How are they with kids?)

Bucky has always been good with kids, even in the 40s, and that's thanks in part to having three little sisters. We also see the children in Wakanda love him. He's very relaxed and more himself around children. In the 40s, his mother used to harass him about when he'd give her grandkids. 

M: Mornings (How are mornings spent with them?)

In the 40s, it was getting up at the crack of dawn to work at the docks for 9-12 hour shifts, with him sleeping in late on the weekends. Now, he still sleeps late because he feels like he doesn't have anything else to do. However, given a routine and responsibilities like helping the Avengers or going on missions, he is more likely to keep a decent schedule. It's also his insomnia that causes him to sleep in more, but not as late as he used to. Now, he'll spend the mornings trying to coax you to stay in bed with him, whether that's through cuddles or fun. ; )

N: Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Again, insomnia is his worst enemy. He tends to take late-night walks or read late into the night before staring at the ceiling, waiting for sleep. Now, he does those things, but he can also enjoy sex with you, cuddling, or watching something stupid on TV. 

O: Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Bucky was semi-open about himself in the 40s, but he was actually more likely to ask about you than about him. Sure, he'd talk about his family, Steve, or his work, but that was about it. However, that was partially the toxic belief that men just don't reveal everything about themselves. Now, it's more about feeling safe to do so and what is "too much." What will chase you away? When will it happen? However, as usual, with trust, this changes, and while there is much he will never reveal, he slowly opens up. 

P: Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He could be a bit fiery in the 40s, but nothing compared to Steve. He was a saint in comparison to Steve. His anger is more biting and calling someone out, maybe raising his voice in the 40s. Now, it's more stormy and quiet. It can be biting, though, and there are still elements of him from the 40s with snide comments - but he hates to fight and would prefer to do anything to prevent it, or if there has to be a fight - find a resolution as soon as possible.

Q: Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every detail in passing, or do they kind of forget? )

In the 40s, he tried to remember as much as he could and actually impressed people with how thoughtful he could be. He remembered everything about Steve, his sisters, and the commandos, but also things about his enemies. Nowadays, he struggles with his memory, but he sometimes writes important things in his journal so he can remember them. However, the will is there, and he tries very hard.

R: Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The first time you watched a movie together and you put your head on his shoulder. It was the first time someone had done that to him since before he fell off the train. That moment turned into full on cuddling during the movie and he was so anxious - but giddy, that he couldn't focus on the movie.

S: Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) 

1940s Bucky was very protective in about every way imaginable, but especially in the stereotypical 1940s ways. However, Bucky now isn't entirely too different from that. The main difference is that he is a little more modern in how he views women and that he is a bit more physically protective. Unsurprisingly, he is very concerned someone from his past might harm you. He's the type that wants you to text him when you get home safely and has similar habits. Emotionally, he has no problem standing up for you. It's something he's always been good at.

T: Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, and gifts?)

He's always been thoughtful about dates, anniversaries, and gifts from childhood to now. He never had much money, so every penny had to count. If he couldn't buy something, he would plan extensively for just the right type of event to attend. With dates, he was a bit more traditional and knew what worked, like dinner and a movie or the carnival, but that doesn't mean he didn't put thought into it. Bucky is the same now, except perhaps even more thoughtful about it. He was always observant, but now he listens more than he talks, whereas before, it was the opposite. He may have more money now, but he prefers to put a lot of thought into what he gets you or something that can help you. Nowadays, he overthinks what he should do for a date or anniversary, but it's always wonderful even when things don't go as planned.

U: Ugly (What would be a bad habit of theirs?)

His self depreciation is pretty bad. His low self confidence also tends to get in the way of things - but it is of no fault of his own! As for an actual habit, he grinds his teeth and clenches his jaw too often giving him jaw pain. 

V: Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Bucky could be quite vain in the 40s and spent quite a bit of time on his hair. He didn't have a choice about his appearance as the Winter Soldier and afterwards, he was too focused on survival and blending in to really care about his appearance. He is trying to get more into self care habits and rituals and you encourage him to spend time on himself, but he doesn't care like he once did. 

W: Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Bucky was surrounded by people in the 40s so he would notice it less if his partner was gone, but he would still feel it! I just think he would bounce back quicker depending on how the relationship was while with Bucky now; he always tries to prepare for the worst and prepare himself for if you do leave him. He would survive, but he would feel like a light was extinguished.

X: Xtra (A random headcanon for them)

Bucky really misses the Indiana house he had to sell. He really wanted to stay there, build a community, and potentially raise a family there, but it wasn't meant to be. (This is more comic verse-esque)

Z: Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Bucky used to be a stomach sleeper, but that quit when he joined the army. It was too uncomfortable to sleep on his stomach then. It's not as easy with his prosthetic, but he still sleeps on his stomach sometimes. (This is canon for Comic Bucky.) 

[lokiswifeduh]

can’t help but drown

pairings: Bucky x fem!reader

summary: the past few months you think you have a handle on your anxiety. but after a silent panic attack in the bathtub, Bucky is there to pull you out.

warnings: panic attack, anxiety, feeling helpless, feelings of suffocation, ANGST!!!

The water moved in soft ruffles around you. Not quite making waves, however, moving from how your anxious legs swayed the water.

Shallow breaths and water hitting the porcelain tub softly were all you could hear. Your body was too overheated, your mind was racing and you could feel your heartbeat in your hands.

You didn't know where this sudden burst of anxiety and panic had risen from. Just that you couldn't get out of the water. Something was keeping you down. Making your body drown.

"Doll?" A sudden tap on the door knocked you out of your trance. You swallowed, your throat feeling like sandpaper against your tongue. "Y-yeah?" Your voice cracked, and you silently cursed knowing Bucky would notice. That super soldier hearing never lets you live anything down.

"You've been in there for a while." You heard him lean against the door, "Is everything alright?" You nodded, remembering as much as Bucky could hear you better than most, he definitely can't see through walls.

"Y-yes. I'm alright, just...uh." You tried to think. Any excuse would work. Bucky might not believe you but he would let the topic go. "Just needed some extra alone time tonight."

"Oh," Bucky mumbled through the door. "Okay, doll." You could feel the hurt in his voice. You didn't need alone time from him. You didn't need to be alone at all right now but he couldn't see you like this.

A sweaty, anxious, mess.

You didn't know how much time had passed. Your nails attempt to dig into the porcelain of the tub, but to no avail, you're only yourself in the process. "Sweetheart?" Bucky taps on the door once more, "Please talk to me." You try to speak, but only a mumble comes out. The bubbles in the bath are gone. Only leaving a white film on top of the now room-temperature water.

"Doll, I'm coming in." You attempt to refuse but nothing comes out as Bucky breaks the lock on the door, softly opening it. You can't look at him. You won't.

You keep your head forward, staring into the wall as you feel Bucky kneel beside you.

He can see how hard your nails are clutching onto the side of the tub, softly lifting your hand as you ball your fist. Your nails now digging into the skin of your palm; drawing blood.

"Hey, hey." Bucky unclenches your fist, letting your nails hurt his metal hand instead.

Using his flesh hand, he softly places a palm on your cheek, bringing your eyes to his. "Doll, what's going on? Talk to me." You shake your head, eyes falling closed as more tears adorn your already-flushed cheeks.

"Okay, that's okay." Bucky whispers, "But I need to get you out of this tub sweetheart." He doesn't need to feel the water to know you've been in the bath for far too long.

"Can I get you out, doll?" You slowly nod, your chin shaking with the sobs you so badly don't want to release.

Bucky mumbles an alright. Moving one of his arms under your legs, the other holding your back as you clutch onto his shirt.

He lifts you up, the water rolling off of your body and soaking his once-dry clothes. "I'm so sorry." You mumble, repeating it over and over as your body starts to shiver from the temperature difference. "Shhh, you're okay, sweetheart."

Bucky wraps a towel around the exposed side of your body, attempting to keep you warm as he brings you into your shared bedroom. "I'm gonna lay you down, doll."

You shake your head violently, clutching onto his henley even harder. "Please, please don't leave me."

Bucky sits down with you still in his arms on the bed, your legs now lying over his as he holds you. "I won't. I promise, sweetheart I'm not leaving."

You both sit there for a moment, tears falling from your eyes, him rocking you back and forth as an old record played from the living room.

You start to feel a weight lift off your chest, your heartbeat calming slightly at the touch of Bucky's arms on yours. You start to speak, wanting to explain yourself when Bucky shushes you. "You don't have to explain sweetheart." He kisses the crown of your head, your hair still wet. "You can talk when you're ready." You nod, continuously wondering how you found someone so caring and endearing. "I just..." You looked up at Bucky, his blue eyes shining down at you with such love. "I felt like I was drowning." He nods, "Sometimes we can't help but drown, doll."

Kissing your forehead once again, he squeezes your body tighter to his. "But I'll be there every time to pull you from the water.

[multifandomfix]

A Protective Hand — Helmut Zemo

Summary: While at an underground party gathering intel about the Flagsmashers with Zemo, he gets a little more protective than is necessary.

Word Count: 777

Warnings: Zemo calls reader his wife

The pulsating beat of electronic music reverberated through the air as you and Zemo seamlessly blended your way into the eclectic crowd. The atmosphere buzzed with the frantic energy of the underground club, but you were there for one purpose — gathering crucial intel on the elusive Flagsmashers.

Zemo, dressed impeccably in a tailored suit, moved with grace and confidence —if perhaps a few awkward dance moves— a stark contrast to the raw and chaotic surroundings. His sharp eyes constantly scanned the room, assessing potential threats and gauging the reactions of those around you. As you navigated the crowded space, Zemo's presence felt both reassuring and slightly unnerving.

The intel you sought was rumored to be within the grasp of the party's attendees, many of whom were connected to the shadowy world of the Flagsmashers. Zemo's contacts had led you to this underground gathering, where secrets were exchanged amidst the thumping bass and dimly lit corners.

You and Zemo played your roles seamlessly, undercover operatives seeking information, disguising your true purpose with laughter and casual conversation. The dynamic between you and Zemo, however, took an unexpected turn when he subtly, yet unmistakably, became more protective.

It started with a subtle touch. A guiding hand on the small of your back, perhaps meant to be an innocently protective gesture as you weaved through the dance floor. Zemo's watchful eyes never strayed far from you, his awareness heightened as he assessed every face in the crowd. The intensity of his gaze, at times, felt like a shield guarding you from unseen threats.

As you engaged in conversations with potential sources, Zemo's protective instincts became more apparent. He positioned himself strategically, subtly creating a barrier between you and the rest of the party. His actions spoke louder than any words could. It was a silent declaration of his commitment to ensuring your safety in this dangerous game of espionage.

In one corner of the dimly lit venue, you found yourself engaged in a conversation with a seemingly unassuming partygoer who might have ties to the Flagsmashers. Zemo, ever watchful, stood nearby, his cold, calculating gaze never leaving the interaction. The air crackled with tension as Zemo's demeanor shifted, his protective instincts reaching a new level.

As the conversation progressed, the partygoer's tone grew more assertive, and Zemo's patience wore thin. Without a word, he stepped forward, a silent warning in his eyes. The partygoer, sensing the shift, excused themselves, leaving you alone with Zemo.

"You're attracting the wrong kind of attention," Zemo remarked, his voice low and authoritative. His protective demeanor, while slightly overbearing, carried a genuine concern for your well being. You wanted to be mad, but you truly hadn’t been making any progress with the stranger, so it’s not as if he’d disrupted the mission at hand.

The dance floor pulsed with the rhythm of the music, and Zemo's grip on the situation tightened. With a subtle nod, he guided you toward a quieter corner, away from prying eyes.

"Caution is paramount in these situations," Zemo reminded. His words were unnecessary, as you already knew them to be true, but they also held a note of genuine worry. "The Flagsmashers are not to be underestimated."

You nodded in understanding, knowing this was neither the time nor the place to fight him on the issue. Besides, you appreciated Zemo's commitment to the mission and, oddly enough, to your safety. As the night progressed, you couldn't shake the feeling that Zemo's protective instincts had forged an unspoken connection between you, transcending the confines of the mission.

Finally, you gained some intel in an overheard conversation on the dance floor. Yet, when you made to leave and reunite with Zemo to fill him in, there was one man that would not let you escape so easily. He’d grabbed your wrist and tugged you back. A noise of surprise escaped you and your eyes immediately darted back and forth, searching for Zemo. You knew he wouldn’t be far.

And he wasn’t. You no sooner turned around and there he stood. “I ask that you release your hand from my wife,” he stated. Your brain short circuited. His what? But the threat worked and the hand immediately left your person.

Suddenly, you regained your wits and played along. “Thank you, Helmut,” you replied, making sure your voice was sweet as sugar. You took a step closer to him and he followed your lead, putting his arm around you. You looked at him adoringly, which you found wasn’t all that difficult. Finally, the man left, and Zemo walked you out, keeping you close. You’d done well and you couldn’t have asked for a better partner.

For anon

Forever Tag: @baubeautyandthegeek, @ghostsunderstoodmysoul, @immyowndefender, @valencethefriendlychangeling, @crimsonwidow666, @rebelbossheart, @thedailyspiritualist, @orangeisnttheonlyfruit, @woman-simp, @aperol-with-izzy, @leonoralessoem, @ellepossum69, @lakita-fisher, @nclgsticore, @ayanthegreat28, @analuw, @luvlesavyy, @malfoyfeed, @aliciabrower, @bitchr-mkay, @sparrowspixie, @imaginationismyworldlypleasure

Helmut Zemo: @unexpected-character, @lilyontheloose, @puppy-coded, @marinarashakeyobooty, @og-kxsh-420, @becomingthedreamversionofme, @music-bird, @chaotic-mushroomz, @mbruben-stein, @sunflowergurlsposts, @danimorgan1708, @jkthighs, @onlykeres, @floresferae, @stressydepressyandlemonzesty, @multifandomlover01, @tokyo-liv, @geekyandgay98, @sweetyprincesschaos, @yetanotherattemptatanaccount, @lady-darkswan3, @an0nimowe, @postcardgirl425, @garlicbreadrry, @bestfriend491, @il0vebeingdelulu

[shortnspidey]

COLLATERAL HEARTS

bucky barnes x fem!stark!reader

SUMMARY: Bucky Barnes finds himself at the center of a political storm. Haunted by his past as the Winter Soldier, Bucky is pursued by both friends and foes, unsure of who he can trust. His mind is a battlefield, filled with fragmented memories and guilt over the actions he was forced to commit. In the midst of this turmoil, he encounters someone who approaches him with a genuine sense of empathy. Unlike others who see him as a threat or a tool, she sees the person behind the trauma. The internal struggle between his desire for connection and his fear of causing harm adds to the anguish he feels daily, making every interaction a bittersweet reminder of the man he wants to be versus the man he fears he still is.

WARNINGS: cursing, heavy angst, marvel theme violence, some talks of blood and gore, self depicting thoughts

A/N: I love Bucky, so I couldn’t help myself in writing this! He deserves the world, marvel needs to leave him alone, so here’s my take on his happy ending! Beautiful divider graphic by @sister-lucifer

chapter one: echoes of the past

chapter two: lines drawn

chapter three: fractured bonds

chapter four: sanctuary

[veebarnes13]

That time of the month

Context: When you're on your period, Bucky becomes the sweetest.

TW: none.

Era: TFATWS

Contains: fluff, care

(English isn't my native language, feel free to correct me!)

Enjoy! :)

☆☆★☆☆

Bucky came back from work pretty late, that night. For the first time, he had slept in the Quinjet on his way back from the mission.

You had fallen asleep on the couch, waiting for him. The sight of you curled up against the armrest broke his heart. He threw his coat on the back of a chair, kicked off his shoes, and walked straight to you. He didn't even open the light to see what he was doing, almost stubbling over Alpine who meowed at him.

He bent over you and brushed a strand of your hair away from your forehead, on which he laid a soft kiss. He always thought you were so beautifully breathtaking, and whenever you fell asleep before him, he couldn't help but admire your features. Sometimes he struggled to understand how someone like you could possibly share their life with him. He was him and you were you.

He gently picked you up from the couch, trying his best not to wake you up.

Failed attempt.

Your eyes fluttered open. He cursed to himself under his breath and held you tighter against his chest. You rubbed your eyelids with a grimace, confused at first. That unplanned nap literally knocked you out.

"James...?" you whispered, hesitating.

"I'm here, doll." he answered, carrying you towards the bedroom.

You smiled, relieved he was back, relieved he was fine. You hated it whenever he had to leave for a mission, wether it was for a few hours, a couple of days or sometimes even whole weeks. You despised knowing he was risking his life out there while you were waiting powerlessly for him to come back. You hated to be impotent, especially when Bucky was in danger, somewhere out of reach.

Suddenly, all the anxiety accrued in the past eight days exploded in your face. You felt your heart tighten, your guts twist. He was back. Bucky was back, again, and he was safe. He was okay. Your Bucky was back home.

You clung to his shoulders and started crying against his chest. He straightened, surprised. Why were you crying?

"Is there something wrong? Are you okay, doll, are you hurt?" he hastened to ask, gently looking all over you for any wounds.

You mumbled you weren't, but the tears were drowning your words. He gripped your waist and put you down on the couch, a worried wrinkle appearing between his eyebrows. You wrapped your arms around his neck, not wanting to let go, and he got even more confused. He didn't know what you wanted and seeing you cry made his heart shatter. He didn't know what you wanted and it made him want to punch himself.

"What is it, beautiful?" he asked again, his voice trembling.

His eyes roamed all over you a second time, trying to find any cut or trace of blood. You took a deep breath in, only to end up sobbing even more. Angry at yourself, you cried harder, your cheeks turning red under the annoyance.

Bucky blinked several times, helpless, his insides twisting in guilt. He took your hands in his and you realized you had clenched them in fists.

"What do y-"

He interrupted himself, widened eyes fixed on a dark spot on the couch. He quickly pulled out his phone and turned on the flashlight.

"You're bleeding." he noticed, jaw clenched.

You sniffed and shook your head. How could you? You didn't remember getting hurt! You look over your arms and thighs, confused, your vision blurred by the tears flooding down your cheeks.

Then it hits you.

Of course.

You got on your period during your nap.

You rubbed your eyes, suddenly aware of the stirring pain under your stomach. You pressed your palm on your lower belly and tried to contain the growing sting.

"Oh. It's that time of the month again?" murmured James soothingly, his hands caressing your arms.

"Yes." you groaned through gritted teeth.

Unfortunately.

Why did it have to show up in the worst moments?!

Bucky cupped your face and erased the tears still streaming down your cheeks with his thumbs. He kissed your forehead and picked you up once again.

"Let me take care of you." he said.

"I can take care of myself." you grumbled.

He raised an eyebrow.

"I know you can. It doesn't mean I'll let you, though."

He carried you to the bathroom, gave you new joggings and threw the soiled ones in the sink to rub them clean later. You complained as he undressed you, planted a kiss on your cheek, helped you to shower, and handed you a night pad for you to put on. You did it, still complaining, and he smiled while looking at you.

"You think it's funny?" you hissed.

"I think you're adorable." he retorted.

You rolled your eyes, but a smile tickled your lips.

Once you were done, Bucky picked you up again and took you to the bedroom. He gently laid you on the bed, but didn't join you yet. He went back in the kitchen and you heard him rummage. He almost ran back, with painkillers made for periods and a glass of water. Along with that came your favorite chocolate bar.

You swallowed down the painkillers and grabbed the bar.

"Right before bed?" you asked.

"Are you really going to act reasonnable?" he chuckled.

"No." you replied with a devilish smile.

You took a huge bite and immediately, Bucky thought you looked better.

As you were eating and humming to yourself, he went back in the living room to clean the couch, and your joggings in the sink. He then showered quickly and changed, tradding his mission clothes for joggings as well and what he called a "lazy shirt".

He joined you in the bedroom, turning off the lights. He bent over you to pick up the glass and put it on the bedside table.

He let himself fall beside you, his flesh arm circling your waist. He pulled your back to his chest and buried his face in your hair. His palm drew soft patterns on your stomach to ease your pain. You smiled and closed your eyes. Through the sufferance, you could always rely on your man to take care of you.

"How was your week?" he whispered.

"You were gone eight days." you correct him.

"Right, sorry. How were your eight days, then?"

You bit on the inside of your cheek.

"Lonely."

Such a lonely day, and it's mine... hummed your brain.

"I'm sorry to hear that." he sighed.

He kissed the back of your neck, the crook of your shoulder, the small curve behind your ear.

"You'll have me all to yourself for at least two whole weeks, now. How does that sound?"

"It sounds too short." you mumbled.

Two weeks and then he'll leave again to save the world, leaving you alone with yourself and your crippling fear of loosing him. The weight of your anxiety added to the sting in your belly and tears runned down your cheeks again. Bucky noticed it and hugged you tighter, his own heart breaking in his ribcage.

"I'm sorry, my love. It'll be okay. I'll always come back to you, you know that. I belong with you." he tried to comfort you.

You sobbed harder.

"What if t-this time, you don't c-come back?" you wept.

He frowned in your hair.

"I always will. You hear me, doll? I always will come back to you."

He kissed your neck.

"You're my home."

He left a trail of kisses down your shoulder to distract you. He didn't want you to think about such a negative thing. The thought of you crying alone in the house over him made his heart explode in pain. He couldn't stand it. He wanted you to be happy, to feel whole. You were his sun; he would chase every cloud that came to block your light.

"I love you, doll." he whispered in your ear.

"I love you too, James." you sniveled.

He gently turned you around so you were facing him.

"No more crying. I don't want to see one more tear on this gorgeous face of yours. Understood?" he said.

You gritted your teeth, holding back your sobs.

"I'm here, right now, and I have the most perfectly perfect woman in my arms. What else could I ask for?" he murmured.

"Perfectly perfect?" you grimaced.

"Listing everything that makes you mine would be too long. You're perfectly perfect for me and I love you." he answered.

You laughed. It was so cheesy!

"There you go. My little ray of sunshine."

He cuddled you close to him, his nose resting in your hair. You wrapped your arms around him and hugged him back, breathing in his scent. He craddled you against his chest until you fell asleep, both of your heartbeats in sync, the two of you tangled in a loving embrace.

☆☆★☆☆

Thank you so much for reading this! I hope with all my heart that you enjoyed it.

If you like my writing, you can take a look at my Wattpad account, "WinterBarnes13", but my works there are mostly in French. I only have one Fanfic in English, it's short and was written two years ago, don't come after me if it's bad lmao.

Lots of love!

- Vee

[make-me-imagine]

Flowers and Courage

Plot: After Bucky fears he might lose his chance with you, he finally finds the courage to tell you how he feels.

Prompts: 'Secret admirer' + "I'm tired of hiding how I feel about you."

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Gn!Reader

Requested By: Anonymous (a left over request from Valentines Day)

A/n: Sorry its so short and kind of sucks lol I had some trouble getting it down.

Words: 1.1k

-

Bucky was deep in thought as he sat at the bar, his hands slowly turning the glass in his hands as he thought about what to do. He wasn't sure how long he had been here already, but it felt like time had slowed down since he sat down to think.

He felt like he was in grade school all over again. Uncertain of how to tell his crush how he feels, so instead he just leaves them secret notes and candy.

But he wasn't a child anymore, and you weren't just a crush. He had never felt anything so deep and real for anyone before. And he had never found something so hard as he did confessing to you.

It was supposed to be easy, show up at your doorstep with flowers. Allow them to lead into a natural confession. But the second you opened your door, and your eyes cast over the flowers, causing a look of surprise over your face, he panicked.

"These were in front of your door." He said suddenly, feeling all courage he thought he had dissipate.

"Oh really?" You asked with growing curiosity as you took them. "I wonder if they were left at the wrong door."

Bucky felt disappointment and anger at himself wash over him as he held back on saying they were definitely for you.

That had happened months ago. And ever since then, it had become habit for him to hide how he felt. The coffees and flowers left to you randomly at work were thought of as kind gestures of a stranger.

When in reality it was Bucky. Showing his feelings for you the only way it seemed he could. Secretly.

He admired you from afar, adored you really. But was your friend up close, showing no real evidence of how he felt, or so he thought, and hoped.

Bucky thought it was fine, it could become the normal, it had become the normal. Until yesterday, when he overhead another agent talking to you, flirting shamelessly.

And then the man had the audacity to take credit for the flowers and the coffees, everything Bucky had done for you. This ass-hat had swooped in taken all the credit, trying to sweep you off your feet.

It infuriated Bucky, but he held back, not wanting to make a scene, or throw the man through a window.

So here he was, trying to find what courage he could through the anger to tell you once and for all how he felt about you.

Downing the last of his drink, Bucky slapped some money down and left, determination anchored in his heart as he made his way towards your apartment.

--- --- ---

As you pulled open your door, your heart leapt in you chest as you saw Bucky standing at your doorstep. You always felt that same wave of nervousness and butterflies when you saw him, even though you had known him, and been friends for years.

Your eyes cast down to his hands and you felt your chest clench. Flowers. Were they for you? Were they from him? Were they left at your doorstep again? Were they from the agent from work?

Out of all of those options, you hoped they would be from Bucky. Just like you had hoped they were the first time.

"Bucky, hi!" You greeted with a bright smile. "Come in!"

He smiled, but you could tell something was off, he seemed nervous, and that only added to your own anxieties.

As he stepped into your apartment he cleared his throat, handing you the flowers that had been in his hands, you noticed his knuckles were white as he gripped them before letting go.

"These are for you."

"Oh-" You hesitated for a moment "Were they left at the door step again?"

The first time this happened, when Bucky told you the flowers were left at your doorstep you were disappointed. But something told you they had really been from him. Maybe it was just you being hopeful.

Bucky shook his head and spoke, his voice softer than you had been expecting. "No, they're from me."

He saw your eyes widen as your face brightened up and he felt a wave of relief and triumph wash over him.

"Thank you, but- what are they for?" You asked cautiously, yet curious.

A thousand thoughts seemed to cross Bucky's mind in the span of a second as he froze, before he cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck.

"They- uh, there-" he sighed before laughing dryly "I used to be better at this."

You smiled "Better at what Buck?"

He met your eyes and saw nothing but your familiar kindness, and a hint of encouragement, even eagerness.

"Confessing."

You felt as thought your heart stopped as your breath hitched in your throat.

Bucky continued before you could respond. "Those flowers from a few months ago, they weren't left on your doorstep, I got those for you too, I just...panicked"

You repressed a giggle "You...panicked?"

"I know." He laughed softly. "I don't know I just- I was afraid you wouldn't feel the same, and that it would ruin what friendship we had. So I kept it to myself. I left you coffees and flowers at your desk after that" he saw your face turn to realization "And yesterday I heard that douc- that guy tell you he did it, and it pissed me off. But I realized it was my fault, for not having told you earlier. So I decided to tell you. Because- because I'm tired of hiding how I feel about you. I care about you much more than I have anyone in my life. And I don't want to lose you or any chance I might have of being with you. "

He watched you closely as you looked down at the flowers, watching as a smile slowly spread across your face. "I knew he didn't leave them for me. He made it so obvious he was lying." You looked up and met Bucky's eyes "And honestly, I had a feeling it might have been you, but I was too afraid to get my hopes up. Because I feel the same about you Bucky, everything you said, I feel it too."

You saw a wave of relief and happiness cross his face as you spoke. Suddenly he stepped closer, reaching up and gently touching your cheek as he smiled. "I wasted quite a bit of time, didn't I?"

You shrugged as your grin widened "Nothing you can't make up for."

xx

Sorry it ended so abruptly, I literally could not get anything else out of my brain lol

General Taglist: @criminaly-supernatural, @imaginesfire, @onuen, @rexit-mo, @alexxavicry, @witchygagirl

Marvel+Bucky Taglist: @aquariuslavenderhoney, @trashywritestrash, @groovy-lady, @marvelouslyme96, @supersourlemon13, @mochamoff, @simsiddy, @gay-and-ready-to-cry, @flourishandblotts-inc, @spuffyfan394, @agent-catfish-kenobi, @locke-writes, @cs-please, @soultrysworld, @a-lumos-in-the-nox, @creativitybeware, @that-marvel-simp, @gatefleet, @skylions-den, @dominos-palast, @maellem, @readingwithatorch, @cauliflowertree, @writerfulltime, @cosplayingwitch, @sweetpeapod, @hoodedbirdie, @oliviah-25,

[fluffysucker]

Desperate People find faith.

Bucky Barnes x reader

An accident mends your broken heart.

A/N: Written in Third POV. No use of Y/N. However, the reader is referred to as a female.

I read this amazing oneshot, and I couldn't stop thinking about this idea. So I added my own twist to it. Thanks to the wonderful writer for sharing it and for inspiring me.

Likes, comments, reblogs are VERY VERY highly appreciated. Opinions really matter to me

TW: Bullets and blood. Mentions of torture but nothing explicit

Main Masterlist

You knew you shouldn't have done it. You should have stayed home. What could barely be described a home. You should have minded your business. You should have acted like the civilian you are now. You shouldn't have done it. But your loyalty to Steve wouldn't have let you

The image of the cheap copy so-called Captain America holding the shield blasting all over the news was a hit. A gut-wrenching hit. There was a guy who was taking the place of your childhood best friend, the man you called brother, the fearless leader. And he looked happy doing so. Then the blond had the audacity to say that Steve felt like a brother to him. You felt physical pain that you almost threw up.

Rationality went out the window. Before you knew any better, you were tracking down the man who was handed your friend's legacy. The man who gave it away when there was nobody more deserving than him. It wasn't hard to know exactly where Sam Wilson was. You were aware he joined the Air Force once again. So you hijacked the location of his next mission, demanding answers.

But it appeared that you weren't the only one who had the same plan. As you were talking to Sam, trying to be as nice as you could, giving him the benefit of the doubt, telling him you weren't here to judge or pick a fight. You just wanted an explanation. You heard him.

"Shouldn't have given up the shield."

His voice was filled with anger. But you could hear the sadness hidden in his tone. Sam scuffed, walking away from you as well. You turned around and you saw him. The love of your life. Quite literally.

You fail to recall a time you weren't in love with James Buchanan Barnes. Growing up together, your trio was inseparable. You would never see one without the others. From the age of three till your twenties, the three of you were more than family.

Despite loving Steve like the brother you never had, the same couldn't be said about his best friend. Your feelings for the brunette were never platonic. Neither were his. In the second grade, he promised to marry you once he got older. And he did. He kneeled to the ground with a beautiful golden ring for you once he secured a job. It was the easiest yes in your life.

Loving him came to you naturally. Stolen glances. Sweet words. Fast heartbeats. Shy smiles. Gentle touches. You were each other first everything. It was like you were made for each other. Like you were born to love him.

And he was your perfect man. Every woman envied you. Every woman hoped to have someone look at her like he looked at you. Every woman wished for a man who treated her the way he treated you. Every woman prayed for a man to love her that much.

Bucky Barnes was head over heels in love with you. And he made sure he showed it.

You were the luckiest girl.

Up until your luck ran out. War knocked on your door like a hurricane, destroying your life.

You remember the night before Bucky was shipped. When you went home after what couldn't be called a double date at Stark expo. The promises the both of you made. Your dream wedding. Your house. Your family. Your kids. All of it. Your future. And you believed him. You couldn't fathom any alternatives.

So when Steve walked in your tent where you did your job as a journalist, who was asked to cover The Howling Commandos missions and subject their heroism to the public, you knew. The look of utter defeat in his face, his glassy eyes, his red nose, the way he was trying to shrink away in his new huge body, you knew.

Your heart was ripped and broken to pieces. The pain was suffocating. You were drowning. You felt like the world ended. Life stopped.

You don't remember how things went after that. You don't remember if Steve ever said the words to you, but you remember his promise of revenge as he held your sobbing body against his chest.

And he did. He ended Hydra. But it came with a price. Very high. After Steve's sacrifice, life became meaningless. You weren't living. You were barely breathing. You were alone.

So when the government asked you to write the final article about the war, the winning announcement, you were about to turn it down. You found difficulties in everything. Leaving your bed sounded like a tiring task. Eating felt like a punishment. Functioning like a human became a burden.

But you remembered how supportive Bucky was of your career. When every man let women their abandon their dreams, Bucky helped you fight for yours. And he gave his life for this victory. Your fiancée and bestfriend. You owed it to them. To be the one to report the triumph tinted with their effort and blood.

So you put in all your strength and travelled with the small team to write the most important piece of work in your life.

However, only a number of people of the team and the article made it back. You didn't.

On your way back, you were ambushed by unknown soldiers. They took you to unknown quarters. You were so confused until you saw that cursed symbol. They weren't gone. Neither was your fiancée.

And that began a lifetime of torture and pain. They brainwashed Bucky but left you with your memories. So when they threatened to hurt him, you caved and let them do whatever they wanted to you. It was a trap they built for you, and you fell in it every time. They would hurt both of you at the end.

You endured it all. You survived it all. Except the moment they made Bucky look you in the eyes and fight you. They erased you from his mind. You saw the love of your life, and he saw nothing. He looked at you and saw either an enemy or a mission partner. And that was the most painful torture Hydra put you through.

As if this wasn't enough. You had to face a hindrance you never thought of.

After Steve rescued the both of you, after him running away from you, after spending two years making amendments with the government and helping Steve search for him, after the accords and Zemo's predicament, after he remembered you, after Princess Shuri was able to give him back his freedom, after you hugged him as he cried, after you decided to finally have that wedding, Thanos happened.

You believe you did something so terrible in another life, and you were getting punished for it in this life. There was no logical explanation as to why this kept happening to you. Why were you robbed of any chances of happiness. Why did you have to watch your man disappear right after having him back. Why you could only feel ache and misery. Why was the world so cruel.

So you kept your hopes to minimum when Steve came to your shared apartment one night, telling you that they had a plan. You agreed to join them in the time heist, ready to be disappointed.

But the second you saw Bucky standing on the sides with his machine gun, you wanted to cry. You thought it was an illusion, but these blue eyes said something else. Now, you were fighting with a strong drive and purpose.

You thought that was it. Your happy ending. You finally had him. But Steve leaving tore you apart. You were happy for your bestfriend who finally did something for himself. However, you couldn't help but feel sad. At least you and Bucky had each other.

Bucky had another thing in mind. Because, a couple of weeks after Steve leaving, Bucky broke up with. He said he needed to figure himself out and work on his pardon. You understood. But it didn't make it any easier.

So you left, giving him all the space he needed. You hadn't seen or spoken to each other since. At least he is alive. That's what you kept telling yourself to find any sort of comfort or condolence.

So this was the first time you had met. He looked different. He cut his hair. He had a scruff. He was wearing an all black outfit. He had gloves on. He had little bags under his eyes. He looked good overall. That's what mattered to you.

"Good to see you too, Buck." Sam said as he walked with intentions to move away from Bucky.

"This is wrong." Bucky didn't give him the chance as be walked beside Sam, without batting you an eye. You couldn't say that didn't hurt but you followed them anyway.

"Look, I'm working, alright. So all this outrage is going to have to wait." It was clear that Bucky wasn't here to have a civil conversation like you.

"You didn't know this was going to happen?" Bucky accused Sam.

"No, of course I didn't know that was going to happen." Sam was quick to deny Bucky's accusations.

"You think it didn't break my heart to see them march him out and call him the new Captain America." This was more directed towards you, following up to your conversation before Bucky cut in.

"This isn't what Steve wanted." Bucky wasn't going to back down.

"Oh my god. So what do you want me to do? Call America and tell them I changed my mind. " Sam's sarcastic reply did nothing but annoy Bucky's more.

"Like I told your wife. There is nothing we can do. You just couldn't wait for her to get home." You looked at Sam. It didn't appear to you that he wouldn't know.

"We broke up."

Another wave of pain hit you as you turned to look at Bucky, who was still not looking at you. How easy could he just say it with no emotions at all. You were fighting to get by every day, and he looked like he didn't care.

"What?!" Sam stopped suddenly once he heard Bucky's words, turning to the both of you.

"You,two lovebirds who literally broke laws to be together, broke up?" Sam couldn't believe his ears. He thought you would have gotten married by now. Your love for each other more epic than all the novels he read.

"Were you asked to give it up?" You changed the topic quickly, refusing to answer Sam's question or talk about your tragic love story. It hurt bad enough, and you didn't want to show it.

"Of course not." Sam heard you loud and clear. He also knew your question had pure intentions. You weren't here to offend him.

"Right, great reunion, guys. Be well." Sam turned to walk out, ending this conversation.

"You had no right to give up the shield, Sam." Bucky was angry, and he was showing it. In the wrong way.

"This is what you aren't going to do. You aren't going to come here in your over extended life and tell me about my rights." Three of you came to a stop.

"It's over." Sam added, looking at you as you came to stand next to Bucky.

"Besides, I have bigger things to deal with."

And you hadn't rest since.

It was, indeed, big thing to deal with.

You had no idea what you were getting yourself into when you impulsively followed Sam and Bucky into the plane.

It was a constant mess. The flag smashers. New super soldiers. Karli Morgenthau. Isaiah Bradley. Zemo. Madripoor. Power Broker. And the worst of them all. John Walker and Lemar Hoskins. It never ended.

All that chaos was a good distraction. You didn't have time to think about your broken heart nor to think about the current nature of your and Bucky's relationship.

It was complicated and confusing.

You fought very well together. Your combined sets of skills were lethal. Your collective training and ability to work together kicked in when needed. Away from that, the both of you barely talked. You acknowledged each other existence. That's how you would describe it.

However, you couldn't explain why Bucky refused when Raynor asked you and Sam to join them in the session in the police station. Or why he always made sure you stayed at least an arm distance away from Zemo. Or why did he choose to be the Winter Soldier for the night instead of you compromising your identity that you kept a secret all these years. Or why, that day at Madripoor, he almost took multiple bullets for you. Or why whenever John showed up, his hand would always find yours.

You were thankful you didn't have the time to think about all of this because you were sure you would have lost your mind. You barely had your emotions in checks. And there was a lot going on.

Then it all went crushing. You would never forget this day.

You followed Sam and Bucky, running out of the building into the street, only to see the calamity that just occurred.

John Walker stood proud with the blood-tinted shield above the man he just slaughtered.

Instinctively, your hand came up to wrap around Bucky's bicep, looking for any comfort for the both of you. This scene would forever be engraved in your memories.

Three of you gave John some time. You stood outside of the warehouse he was in right now. You knew if you all went angry, the results would be catastrophic.

But it was anyway.

You let Sam do most of the talking. He was the best in this. If anyone could convince John to hand over the shield, it would be him. So you stood and watched. But it appeared that the time you gave John Walker to cool down only drove him more over the edge. So, with the three of telling him to give up the shield, John Walker lost his mind.

It should have been an easy fight. A veteran and an avenger and two super soldiers. It shouldn't be hard. But neither one of the three of you was fighting was the intention to hurt John. Unlike him, John was fighting to kill. With his new powers, he was uncontrollable.

You let out a high-pitched scream once you saw John throw Bucky away, electrocuting his arm, making him lose consciousness. Then you watched as he straddled Sam on the ground. You needed to act quickly.

You groaned as you got up from the floor, looking at the cut in your arm. Nothing too bad. You told yourself as you ran toward John tickling him away from Sam.

It was just you and him, now.

And it was brutal.

You were still trying not to hurt him too much. However, he was unstoppable. So when he figured that he would lose combat with you eventually, he retrieved to other options.

Picking the shield and throwing it at you for it cause a cut in your chest was enough distraction for him to take out the gun he kept in his suit and shot you.

The bullets found their places in your stomach and legs. He aimed for places that you wouldn't recover from. You fell to the ground, coughing blood, feeling the bullets rest so deep in your body.

John walked towards you with the shield. He looked at you. His eyes were showing insanity and rage. He lifted the shield up and hit you in the chest. The pain was like no other. And you knew that was it.

It felt ironic in so many ways. Your bestfriend's shield. The shield that presented all of Steve's values and beliefs. The shield that helped once save your life. Now, it was going to be the weapon to kill you.

Of all the ways you thought you would die in, this wasn't even close. But when was life ever fair to you? At least you would have peace now. Your dying wish was for Bucky to know how much you loved him and how you wanted him to be fine and happy. Because you loved Bucky more than life itself.

You tried to distract yourself from the excruciating pain by counting how many hits of the shield would it take to end you.

You counted two.

You started coughing violently as you felt a weight got lifted off your chest. All your body going numb for seconds.

You saw Bucky was up once again, and he managed to corner John with Sam, trying to break his arm to take away the shield.

You desperately tried to get up and help them, but your whole body was on fire. Why was the serum not working?

A breath escaped you once you heard the sound of bone breaking. Only to realize breathing hurt. Everything hurt so bad.

With cuts on your arms and face, bruises on your ribs, wounds in your chest, bullets in your stomach and legs, you gave up, closing your eyes.

Because of your agonizing pain. You didn't hear Bucky beating the life out of John after taking the shield. He didn't stop until John passed out.

Bucky turned around and saw a sight that came straight out of his worst nightmares. He had seen it too many times. Woke up scared and sweating because of it. A sight that he knew would haunt him more than it already did.

Your lifeless body in a pool of blood.

He took careful steps towards you, praying it would disappear, and this would just be a nightmare of his. But the sound of your faint heartbeats made it real.

"Doll." Bucky got on his knees next to you, holding your motionless body in his arm.

You hissed in pain as you felt a movement that caused all the pain in your body to stir awake again.

"Bucky." Your voice was a whisper. You were too tired to open your eyes, but the feeling of the metal around you was familiar.

"I'm right here, doll." Bucky may not let it show in his voice, but if you opened your eyes, you would see the fear and tears.

"I need you to stay awake, okay. Can you do this for me? Please, stay awake." Bucky never felt this desperate before.

"Help is on the way." The three of you had already arranged with Torres to have an ambulance on stand-by. You had a feeling things would go bad. But not that bad.

"I'm tired." The amount of blood you were losing was making you too dizzy.

"I know, doll. But you will be okay." Bucky didn't care about the blood getting all over him as he pulled you closer to him.

"You will get better. Because you have to." He was saying it more to himself than you.

"I prayed for this." Talking was getting too hard, but you had to tell.

"What did you pray for?" Bucky was doing anything to keep you awake. He needed to listen to your voice.

"To die in your arms."

Bucky felt the tears escape his eyes, falling down freely on his face.

"You aren't dying. You will be okay." You heard it. The shakiness of his voice.

Fighting the great pain you were in, you opened your eyes to look at him. You wanted to see him one last time. This is why you prayed to die in his arms. So his face would be the last thing to see. This voice would be the last thing you heard. His arms the last thing you felt. Your farewell to the cruel world would be with the man who had been your heaven on Earth.

You lifted your arm with a moan of pain before you placed it on his cheek. You needed to say it. You needed it to be your last words.

"I love you, Bucky. I loved you my whole life."

With that, the world went dark.

You didn't get to see the mess that Bucky became as he heard your heartbeats slow down. His screams and desperate calls of your name to wake up.

He was so blinded by pain that he didn't let the paramedics near, protecting your body until he realized who they were. They didn't try to fight him when he insisted on getting in the ambulance with you.

All the time you were in the surgery, Bucky was inconsolable. He didn't care that Sam and Torres saw him as he sobbed, sitting on the floor waiting for anybody to tell you were fine. All he cared about was that he didn't say it back. You could die not knowing how much he loved you. The thought brought new tears to his already puffy red eyes

He prayed to God and anyone that would hear. If you were standing close enough, you would hear him. "Please, don't take her from me." "Please, let her be okay." "Take me instead of her." "She deserves so much better, please."

In his long life that was filled with hardships, torture, and wars, this was the worst pain he ever went through. He could feel his heart twisting and breaking. Every cell in his body was hurting. The emotional pain turning physical.

His eyes were dried up. Cheeks stained with tears. His mind going through all the worst scenarios. None of them he would be able to survive.

He jumped up from the floor when the door opened, and a doctor walked out. His heart was beating a thousand miles a second. All these prayers never leaving his mouth. His last hope.

"She is okay."

Tears of relief fell from his eyes. You survived it. You made it. The doctor talked about your injuries. With medications and the seurm, you would heal properly. Bucky didn't pay attention. His mind focused on one thing. He needed to see you.

After knowing your room's number, Bucky didn't leave your side. The doctor told him it might take a bit for you to wake up, but he didn't mind. He would stay forever.

It wasn't long before you woke up.

You opened your eyes slowly, adjusting to the bright lights. The last thing you remember was the intense pain. It didn't hurt as much now. You just felt so exhausted. You tried to move your hands, only to be blocked.

You looked down to see Bucky holding your hand so tightly and his head resting next to it. You could tell his eyes were swollen and his nose was red. But he looked peaceful sleeping. You missed him so much.

Without much thought, you moved your other free hand to his head, playing with his hair. It felt soft under your fingers. You blamed the serum that made him wake up from such a simple touch.

You smiled softly as you watched him, trying to remember where he was and what he was doing. He looked confused until he saw you.

"You are awake." Bucky got up from the seat next to the bed.

"Are you okay? Are you pain? What hurts? I'm going to call the doctor." He was frantic. He only stopped when you held his metal hand.

"I'm okay, Bucky." You reassured him with a smile.

You repeated it a couple of times before he finally sat back down on the chair. That's when you noticed he was still in his suit that was covered in blood. Your blood.

After he sat down, he looked at your intertwined fingers together and couldn't help the tears.

"What's wrong?" You asked as you moved your thumb gently on his knuckles.

"You scared the life out of me." He answered as he wiped his tears away.

"Though we were used to this, Barnes." You replied playfully, hands still together.

"Not when it comes to you. Never you." Bucky was fast to respond.

"Nothing I haven't been through before." You said it casually. You didn't miss the look in Bucky's eyes. It held too much depth to it. You couldn't put your hand on it

"Is your arm okay? Do you need to get it checked?" Flashbacks were coming back to you bit by a bit. As you touched his metal arm, you remembered what happened to him.

"You are in the hospital bed, and you are asking about my arm." Bucky's laugh was dry. He would always be in awe of how caring you were.

"I will never stop caring about, Bucky. Even if you don't want me." It was true. Nothing could make you stop caring about Bucky.

"Don't want you?" Bucky couldn't let your comment go by.

"Yeah. You don't want me anymore. It's okay. I understand."

"You understand?"

"I remind you of a bad time. The worst. And you had to move on. You had to cut ties with all parts of this time."

"Is this why you think we broke up?"

"Isn't it?"

You started telling yourself this after the breakup as a way to pick the shattered pieces of your heart. Of course, he didn't want to be with someone who held their bad time as a constant reminder on her body as scars. Or with someone who went through the same hell as him. He deserved someone better. Someone who wasn't so damaged.

And you understood.

"No, it isn't."

He was planning to tell you everything but not right now. But words just fell out from the tip of his tongue.

"I don't look at you and see bad time. I look at you, and I see all my failures."

You looked at him, baffled, not getting what he meant.

"I remember everything."

You still didn't know what he wanted to say.

"I remember what Hydra did to you. What they made you do for me. What I did to you."

"Bucky.."

"How they pushed you too far in the lies of not hurting me. How they made you watch as they erased you from my mind. How they made me fight you. Hurt you."

You were about to tell him how you didn't hold him accountable to any of this because it was never his fault. It was never his intention. You were sure Bucky would never hurt you. The Winter Soldier not too. But he cut you off.

"They took you because they knew how much you meant to me. How important you are to me. I was the reason you had to go through all of this."

"I look at you and remember how I failed to protect you. When that's all I ever wanted in life. To protect you. But I failed."

"Just like I failed today."

Before you could say anything, he kept going.

"I couldn't understand how you could still love me."

"I looked at the list of people I hurt, and your name was first. And you wanted to help me. You wanted to stay by my side. I couldn't live with the guilt. I still can't. I had to let you go despite how bad it hurts."

"But, doll, I want you to be sure nobody will ever love you half as much as I do."

It took years for Hydra to remove you from his mind. But what they didn't know was that they never fully succeeded.

At first, he would forget his name but remember his girl and everything about you. Then they become harsher, so he would only remember your face and name. Then, it became only your face. Then nothing. The blank paper for them to write what they wanted.

However, whenever Hydra made the both of you train together or go on missions, he would get this rush of flashbacks like a movie playing in his head once he was alone in his cell. It would be you. In different places and different ages. The Winter Soldier would convince himself that it must be his memories from past missions. Effects of being wiped too many times.

The soldier was never able to shake the feeling of guilt after a training session where he would be instructed to be tough with you. A feeling so foreign to him.

He remembers the first time he refused to hurt you. They made him watch from far as they tortured you. Then they wiped him again. Every time he showed any sympathy for you, he was wiped and handled roughly.

But all the efforts weren't enough. You were the first thing he remembered once he settled in Bucharest. That's when the guilt came in. It was you. The love of his love. His fiancée. And they got to you. And he couldn't save you.

Even after the blip, His thoughts kept going back to how he betrayed you and hurt you instead of protecting you like he was meant it.

But the worst part was how he thought he didn't deserve your love anymore. He thought you would resent him. So he decided to break his heart into two. He left.

You were the forbidden topic that Raynor wasn't allowed to go near despite how much she wanted. You were the centre of his nightmares. All of them. Past memories of both of you at Hydra. Missions and trainings. And the worst, losing you. Watching you getting killed. Nightmares that invaded him, and he was defenceless.

"I love you, and I'm so sorry." Bucky laid soft kiss on your hand.

"Let me ask a question, Bucky." He looked at you, tears still filling his eyes.

You didn't expect this to be the real reason why you and Bucky broke up. But you should have known. He was too good of a man.

"If it had been the other way you around, wouldn't you have done the same? Would you have hated me then?"

"I would give my life for you without hesitation. And nothing could ever make me hate you."

His answer was fast. That was the only thing he knew about himself. You come first, always.

"Then why are you surprised with what I did? You don't love me more, Bucky." You laughed softly, already feeling your ribs ache a bit.

You always had this running joke that Bucky loved you more than you did. And to a lot of the extent, it was true.

"You didn't deserve it."

"Neither did you."

You patted the spot on bed next to you, wanting him to be close to you. And he listened. He sat on the bed, hands never leaving each other.

"Haven't we been through enough? Haven't the world tore us apart too many times? Let us have this."

If he still loved you, then you should be together. You should be broken together. You should heal together. It was poetic how even in pain, you were still together.

Both of you understood each other better than anyone. You shouldn't be separated.

"You don't hate me?" It was Bucky's worst fear and biggest doubt. If the damage Hydra did was unrepairable.

"I can live hundreds of years and still be in love with you."

You squeezed his hand to make sure he knew how serious you were. "You are all I have ever known, Bucky."

With that, Bucky got up and moved so close to you. Your faces millimetres away from each other. His breath fanning over your face. His personal scent with dust and blood engulfing you. His blue eyes warming the inside of you.

"I got the best girl of them all." Bucky kissed you.

It was a soft, slow kiss. A sign of starting over. Of getting back.

You smiled in the kiss. Bucky used to say this all the time back then. You were known as Bucky's best girl. He used to call you that.

You broke away, feeling so much better now. Bucky rested his flesh hand on your cheek.

"I thought I lost you. I was so scared."

"You didn't. I'm right here."

"Though you will leave me before I say it back." You looked at him, puzzled.

"I love you, doll. You are the thing I live for. You are the purpose of my existence. I love you so much."

You didn't care about the pain as you moved up to meet his lips one more time. And he kissed you back right away.

"You owe me a ring and wedding, Barnes." You joked while you brought your other hand to hold into his suit to ground yourself.

He laughed before he moved away for a bit, and you already missed the closeness, and he wasn't far. You watched as he brought his dog tags out. You saw something bright with them but couldn't tell it was.

"Oh my god." You felt tears gather in your eyes as Bucky brought out the shiny thing closer.

It was your ring. Your engagement ring. The ring Bucky put in your finger many years ago. It was it. You thought it must have been lost that you didn't try to look for it, avoiding the disappointment.

But here it was. Bucky was able to find it. And he kept it with his dog tags. So close to his heart. Where you belonged.

Bucky got in one knee in his technical gear in a hospital room with you connected to IV.

"Doll, will you marry me?"

You laughed loudly that you felt pain shot again in your body. Bucky was next to you in an instant when your laugh turned to a cough.

"Third time is a charm." You said as you gave him your hand.

With another proposal in Wakanda before the snap, you managed to get Bucky Barnes on his knees three times for you.

He put the ring on your finger and pressed a kiss on your hand. "It will be. Mrs. Barnes." The name always had its sweet effect on you.

Bucky leaned in again to kiss you. And this kiss felt out of the world. Like a lifeboat before drowning. Water after the drought. Your rescue.

It was Bucky's promise of safety and security. Nothing and nobody was ever going to hurt you again. A promise of a safe home. Together.

You kept your forehead resting on his as your hand found its place once again on his suit.

"No to be rude, but you need a shower, babe." You could feel the dust on his face and the blood dried on his suit and skin.

"I will be okay. Probably going to fall asleep." You didn't give him a chance to protest.

"Plus, you know. I like my man nice and clean." You pecked his lips playfully.

The sound of the word "your man" falling from your lips referring to Bucky made his heart do little dances. Damn right he was your man.

"I won't take long." He kissed your hair before he got up and left to get himself presentable for his lady.

The world felt lighter, brighter, better. You felt happy. You were happy. You looked at the ring that held huge meaning for you. You weren't hurting. You were finally okay. You had your man back.

Who would have thought a near death incident would be the thing to give you back the man who always brought life to you.

[onceuponastory]

all this love - bucky barnes x reader

I took all this love I found, and I hope that it's enough Is it enough? - only love by pvris

Plot: After John Walker oversteps, Y/N makes sure that her boyfriend Bucky knows just how much she loves him. Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader  Warnings: John Walker being an asshole, some violence (not from Bucky), slightly graphic mentions of injuries and blood, a few mentions of Bucky’s past as The Winter Soldier, and the anxiety/self doubt he has afterwards. As always, if I miss any triggers please let me know! Notes: Some of you may know but I love PVRIS, and I love this song, so of course I had to write something for Bucky using it. Not beta’d, so any mistakes are my own. Also, thanks again to @staticscreenwriting / @astartothemoon for my dividers!

Y/N scans the room, keeping an eye out for Karli and the other Flag Smashers. As she does, she suppresses a sigh. She loves accompanying Bucky and Sam on their  missions and helping them as best as she can, but this time it’s different. For once, she can’t wait to get home. Mostly because of their company - John Walker. 

At first, she tried to be civil, even though she, like the others, doesn’t agree with him being made Captain America. And Lemar is friendly enough. But John’s done nothing but be annoying and rude to them all ever since they joined forces. At least once this is over, they can forget he ever existed.

Right now, John’s complaining about something yet again, angrily pacing around as he does. “John, just calm down. We’ll find Karli soon.” Y/N insists. Immediately, John stops, his head whipping round angrily. Despite how annoyed he makes her, the glare John gives her at that moment strikes fear into her heart.

“Don’t do that Y/N. Don’t fucking patronise me. You have no idea of the pressure I’m under.” He warns. As soon as he takes a step towards her, Bucky and Sam are by her side, ready to shield her if needed. Bucky’s face hardens angrily.

“She wasn’t patronising you, John. And you better watch your tone. Don't talk to my girlfriend like that.” Bucky warns, his eyes narrowing slightly. However, instead of backing off, John keeps going, this time turning his attention to Bucky.

“Or what? Are you going to go all Winter Soldier on me?” He scoffs. Bucky visibly tenses at John’s words. Protectively, Y/N steps forward, reaching out for Bucky’s hand. “This is really easy for you, isn’t it? All that serum running through your veins.” John continues, not caring about the obvious effect his words are having on Bucky.

“Watch your fucking tone….” Y/N hisses. Yet John ignores her warning, continuing his verbal tirade on Bucky.

“I mean, does anyone here really trust him after what he did? Who’s to say he’s not working with them, or that he won’t try to kill us too?” Y/N’s anger grows, and she tightens her grip on Bucky’s hand.

“John.” Sam warns. Bucky opens his mouth, about to defend himself.

“What? Don’t act like you don’t agree. He’s a monster who doesn’t deserve to be here.” And with those words, Bucky’s face falls. He turns and looks at Y/N, his eyes shimmering with tears. The sight breaks Y/N’s heart. Before she can say anything, Bucky turns and storms off.

“Bucky! Bucky, wait!” Y/N calls after him. Just as she’s about to go after him, John’s smug voice sounds once more.

“I don’t know why she’s going after him. He’s not worth it. She’s too good for someone like that, anyway.” He murmurs, clearly intending for her to hear him. Y/N’s blood boils, and her fist clenches.

“Y/N….” She registers Sam’s voice beside her, warning John to be quiet, and for her to control her anger before she does something she regrets. And for a moment, she considers doing just that, and simply going after Bucky. Yet, John’s next words seal his fate.

“Besides, I’m a much better choice. At least I’m not a murderer.” Y/N turns around, marching right up to John. He sneers at her, the look making her stomach churn. But she’s too blinded by anger to think about that right now. “See, she understands-” John’s words are cut short by Y/N’s fist connecting with his nose. A sickening crack fills the room, and John hisses as blood begins to pour from his nose. “You fucking bitch.” He hisses, lunging for her before being pulled back by Lemar in the nick of time, whilst Sam pulls her back, protectively grasping her arm.

“Say that shit about my boyfriend again, and I’ll end you.” She warns, her voice like venom. Sam’s voice sounds again, telling her to choose her next words carefully. Of course, she knows he’s right, but she ignores him, too angry to even think straight. “He never chose to be a killer, but you chose to be an asshole.” She blocks out whatever the rest of John says, consumed by her desire to find Bucky safe and well.

“I’m going to go find him. Can you deal with…that?” She gestures vaguely in John’s direction, and Sam nods.

Y/N visits several places to try and find Bucky: a park, a number of coffee shops and bars, searching high and low for the brunette super soldier she loves more than anything in the world. And yet, there’s no sign of him. With each failed sighting, Y/N’s stomach churns more and more with anxiety, and her heart pounds more and more. Bucky is fast, and he could be anywhere by now. The next time she sees John, she’s going to do more than break his nose. Suddenly, her phone starts ringing, and for a moment, her heart almost stops, thinking it’s Bucky.

When she sees Sam’s name flash up on her caller ID, she can’t help feeling disappointed. But she knows Sam is Bucky’s friend too, and he wants to help find him just as much as she does.

“Any sign of him?”

“Nope. Checked everywhere nearby I could think of. Any news on your side?”

“None yet.” He replies, and she sighs. “Look, I’ll take the wings and see if I can find him. You go to the house and see if he’s there.”

“Okay.” Sam can immediately pick up on the anxiety in her voice, and he sighs.

“Y/N. We’ll find him, alright. I promise.”

“I hope you’re right.”

As soon as she steps into the house she shares with the boys, Y/N immediately senses that someone is there. Her heart rate picks up. Bucky. Maybe he’s here. “Bucky? Babe, are you there?” She calls. “It’s just me.”

“Go away.” A quiet, yet familiar voice calls. Despite how much her heart wrenches at the sound of pain in his voice, Y/N breathes a sigh of relief. He’s here, and safe. Y/N immediately sets off towards his voice, quickly texting Sam to let him know that Bucky’s okay. Bucky sits huddled beside their bed, curled up into a ball. He doesn’t even look up at her when she enters. The sight makes Y/N feel like a hundred daggers have been stabbed into her. She kneels down in front of him, gently placing her hand on his knee.

“Bucky, sweetheart, it's me.”

“I said, go away.” Bucky’s voice is muffled, but she can tell he’s been crying. Her eyes fill with tears, and she has to stop herself from finding John and punching him all over again. The fact someone like him, someone so rude and cruel, could make someone like Bucky feel so awful about himself infuriates her. “John’s right. I’m a monster. I don’t deserve anything good, especially not you.” Bucky sniffles, and Y/N’s heart breaks all over again.

“No, you’re not Bucky. What you did all those years, it wasn’t you. They tortured you and brainwashed you. It wasn’t your choice.” She insists. “The serum never corrupted Steve, but it didn’t corrupt you either. They made you a killer. It wasn’t your choice.” Bucky looks up at her then, the skin around his eyes red from crying. Y/N’s face softens. “You’re making amends and showing people you’re sorry. That says a lot about you. John has no idea what the fuck he’s talking about. He’s just an asshole.”

“But the serum is still in me. W-What if I hurt you?”

“You could never. All you’ve done is show me love and support. Honestly, I don’t think you’ve got an evil bone in your body.” Bucky takes her hand, squeezing it tightly, which Y/N returns. Even before they got together, Bucky has supported and protected her through it all, and now it’s her turn to do the same.

“You still deserve someone better. Someone who isn’t as broken and messed up as me. I thought I wasn’t good enough for you ever since we got together, and even John sees it, too.” Y/N leans in, gently kissing his forehead.

“Hey…I love you, Bucky. Nobody else, just you.” She insists, cupping his cheek in her palm and using her thumb to wipe away his tears. “And I love you just the way you are. To me, you’re the best person in the world. Don’t listen to John Walker. He’s not even half of the man you are. I know I can’t possibly take away all your pain and trauma, but I’ll be here to tell you just how good you are and how much I love you every day.”

“You’re such a good person, Y/N.” Bucky mumbles. “So kind, and so loving.”

“So are you. And you show me that every day.” Bucky shuffles forward into her embrace, wrapping his metal arm around her tightly. 

They sit together for a while, Y/N letting Bucky cry as she holds him protectively, and whispering reassurances in his ear. “I’m going to be here forever, Buck. You’re stuck with me, I’m afraid.” She tells him when they pull away. Bucky manages a chuckle at that, and it makes her heart flutter. He gazes at her, smiling like she hung the moon.

“I’m glad. I don’t think I could ever survive without you in my life.” Smiling, Y/N leans in close, gently kissing his lips.

“Me neither. Good thing that I’m not going anywhere.” Bucky takes her hand, pressing a kiss to it. Suddenly, he notices the bruise developing on her knuckles, and his eyes widen.

“What happened to you? Did he hurt you? He can say whatever he wants to me, but if he hurts you, then there’s going to be a problem.” Bucky insists. Just as he’s about to get up, Y/N stops him.

“Don’t worry. It wasn’t him that did it…sort of.” Bucky’s brow furrows, and Y/N chuckles. “I punched that smug fucker right in his face after what he said to you. I probably broke his nose, actually.” Bucky gasps.

“You did that for me?”

“Of course I did.” She shrugs. “He doesn’t get to mess with my boyfriend and make him feel like shit without facing the consequences.”

“Thank you.” Bucky smiles. “At least let me get you some ice, though.” He helps her up, gazing at her with a smile. Y/N’s stomach flutters once more. “I’m the luckiest guy in the world to have you protecting me, you know that?”

“Well, you protect me, so it’s only fair I return the favour.” He kisses her lips once more, and Y/N smiles. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

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[ourghoststories]

Apologies [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

"James, seriously! We're gonna get married and you can't stop getting in harm's way, you said the Winter Sol- White Wolf thing was in your past. I'm not saying you can't do anything, save the day, go chase after who you want, but please just think about how much danger you're putting yourself in and the repercussions. The government are already monitoring you closely. I don't want them to hurt you, like that flag-smasher chick or Zemo- what if they'd decided you're next?" I rambled anxiously.

"Zemo doesn't like super soldiers Buck, I don't trust him and even though you did everything right, doesn't mean he won't decide to target you, or us. I'm much more concerned about you".

"(Printcessa) принцесса, I love you but I can't do this... I need to keep going, the nightmares only lessen when I do it. I promise I won't get into stuff that doesn't involve me but I need to work through my book, I have my demons and you have yours" he said glaringly, taking a tone of frustration and concern, before letting the signature frown plaster his features.

"I can't do this either Bucky, maybe we should have a break" I sniffled.

--

I was out driving and I couldn't stop thinking about it, Bucky and I had an argument and this time it was bad.

Leaving was the only thing I could think of doing after we had the conversation, I cared about him more than anyone knew, even Bucky.

He had gotten back after everything happened with Zemo and I had no idea what was happening, he did everything by the books, despite charging into the situation most times with impulse taking over.

I loved him but I was so unsure about this, that's why we argued, Sharon was the Power Broker and had sustained injuries and it was so close to being him.

Plus I didn't like Sharon hanging around Bucky, I knew she didn't have any intentions but she killed someone without hesitation and James really didn't like that, either did Sam.

He would be steadfast and run into situations and come back to me and I'd have to deal with the injuries, the repercussions and damage, time after time and it never stopped, it was getting exponentially worse and that's why I cared, I cared because I loved him and he didn't seem to get it... Or more like he did but was being too stubborn to realise.

Even Sam was telling him to be careful to no avail, he wasn't always this brash, when Steve passed, he didn't know what to do anymore, he was lost and therefore I too, was lost- I hated seeing Bucky this way and nothing was helping, I've been happily dealing with it but I couldn't see him hurting or getting hurt without any consideration, anymore.

I drove around for a bit aimlessly, before I decided that it had been long enough and I wasn't trying to torture him, so I headed back home, the place we owned together.

"Y/n?" He said shocked, but had a smile on his face.

"Yeah I know I've fucked up, y/n, let's talk about it inside" he said apologetically.

I followed him through the front door and into the lounge room.

"I just don't know how you can keep doing it Bucky, you know how much I love and care for you, I know it's part of you and who you are but we're an us now and I need you around... Especially if we're going to have a family" I sniffled, trying not to let tears escape my eyes.

"Y/n I know, I know baby" he said sweetly, placing his metal hand on my back and rubbing it affectionately.

"We've always gotta be prepared, I'm trying to minimise threats to us, I'm going to be more careful I promise. Everything will be okay" he sympathised.

"Okay Buck I trust you, I just get scared" I sighed as he pulled me into a big hug.

He placed a kiss on my cheek, before he took my hand in his and squeezed it reassuringly.

"I love you" he smiled gently.

"I love you too, actually i love you more" I chuckled, poking my tongue out.

"Never doll, you know that I would never let anything happen to you, and when we decide to have a family, I'm going to be more responsible because having little mini versions of you and I would be a dream " he chuckled, caressing my face gently and putting his face close to mine so he could stare straight into my eyes.

"Bucky" I smiled happily, letting out an exhale, feeling the pressure of the situation dissipate.

"Mm?" He hummed.

"I love you so much, thank you for making me feel better" I replied as he kissed my hand lovingly.

"I'll always love you and I'll always try to do better for us, never forget that y/n, you're my first priority, not Zemo or anyone else, they'll never get between us, I pinky promise" he said soothingly.

[abbatoirablaze]

Welcome To The Dollhouse, Madam

Word Count:  858

Warnings:  implied smut, masturbation.

Bucky smirked as he walked into their shared bedroom.  Steve was happily snoring, face down and naked, stretched out across the bed.  Off towards the bathroom, he could hear the shower running, and he knew that their girlfriend must be getting ready for the upcoming evening. 

They weren’t doing anything special, but she had managed to convince both super soldiers to take the night off and have a couple’s night in.  Something that originally, Bucky hadn’t been on board with, but seeing his boyfriend happily snoring away, and knowing that his girlfriend was the cause of it, made him all too content with the moment.

As quietly as he could, he made his way towards the large ensuite. Once inside, he couldn’t stifle the laughter as he heard his girlfriend softly humming some top 40 song to herself.

“Mind if I join?” he asked softly as he leaned up against the counter. 

He saw her jump ever so slightly through the heated glass, before giggling once more, “It depends, sarge…if you think you’re actually coming in to get clean, or dirty?  Because we do have an event to go to tonight.”

“Yeah…sorry about that.”

“You told me that we could have a date night.”

“Showing you off to the world can be considered a date…a very public one…” he reminded her, “you know…since Steve and I came out, saying that we were in a polyamorous relationship with someone there’s been a lot of speculation of exactly who you are.”

“Trust me…I know,” she giggled, “so don’t be thinking you can sneak on in with Steve asleep in our room to get some nookie on the down-low.”  

Bucky chuckled, “it’s why I didn’t just come in, doll…but in all fairness, I was out picking up our tuxes and your dress…and Steve looks like he got off more than a few times…is it really fair if I don’t come in and help?”

“So, he wants to be a dirty boy?” she teased gently as she looked at him through the glass.  Bucky’s smirk only got wider as she leaned towards the wall.  Bucky’s breath caught in his throat as one of her hands massaged her breast, while the other slipped between her legs. 

He could smell the arousal dripping off of her as she slid her fingers into herself. 

“Doll…you’re playing with fire…” Bucky warned gently as he felt his cock starting to twitch in his pants, “you can’t honestly be still riled up after the state I saw Steve in…”

“What can I say,” she giggled, “call it the hormones…I feel like I’ve been insatiable for weeks…”

“Because you have been…you know, not that I’m complaining or anything,” he answered warmly, stepping away from the counter.  He stripped off his shirt and stepped out of his pants and briefs before stalking around the shower’s edge.  A growl escaped the back of his throat when she pulled her hand from her core and brought it up to her lips, “you’re a naughty little girl, Bunny.”

“I can still taste Steve inside me,” she purred as she reached back into herself and caught more on her fingers before slipping her fingers back to her mouth and moaning, “but you know I love it when I can taste both of you on my tongue…”

Bucky reached forward and opened the shower.  Another growl escaped the back of his throat when he saw her in all of her glory, “oh that can be arranged, bunny.”

They’d only just found out she was pregnant, but already the changes to her body were incredible. Her breasts had already gotten larger, and the slightest dimple of a baby bump lined her stomach, making him crave seeing her naked at all hours of the day.

And that thought alone in itself was driving Bucky and Steve feral. 

Neither super soldier had realized just how much of a breeding kink they truly had until their girlfriend announced that she was ten weeks pregnant. 

And how fast a super soldier baby was developing inside of her.   Both men had fallen in love with the fact as soon as they had heard it.  And even more so when they went to the first sonogram.  

She was pregnant with their child. 

“Bucky…”

The super soldier was torn from his thoughts as he looked up into his partner’s eyes. 

“Yeah, Bunny?”

“You’re staring,” she teased, pulling the super soldier into the shower with her.  Bucky closed the glass door behind himself and wrapped his arms around her waist, “has anyone ever told you that you have a staring problem?”

He chuckled, shaking his head as he instantly lied, “never, doll…guess it’s just you.  You just have something that I can’t take my eyes off of.”

“Me…or the little super soldier you and Steve put in me?” Bucky all but growled once more and she smiled, “you better behave, James!”

“Oh, never!” he teased, his hands falling down to her stomach, “me and Steve made you a promise sweetheart…we’re gonna love you with every bit of ourselves…and a lot of the includes misbehaving with that pretty self of yours every chance we get.”

[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Dr. Raynor asks Y/N and Bucky what they think the other’s deepest, darkest fears are (as some sort of teamwork exercise that the duo immediately calls BS on). This leads the reader to list off a bunch of things about thinking he’s a fraud, that he’s incapable of giving or receiving love, etc. Bucky, smirking, keeps it direct. He simply says that Y/N’s biggest fear is admitting that she’s in love with him.

He says it facetiously, of course. But the hesitation and lack of immediate barbed response says more than words ever could.

The silence, naturally, is the perfect opportunity for Dr. Raynor to use her notebook.

Maybe not enemies-to-lovers, but more rivals-to-lovers? A hefty amount of idiots-in-love, and probably some angst-to-fluff-to-Sam-owing-Sarah-$20-for-the-bet-that-they-weren’t-in-love.

Just Admit It » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Pairings: TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Summary: Dr. Raynor has you and Bucky do a teamwork exercise which ends up with you two admitting your feelings for each other.

Warnings: Angst, Fluff ending, language, Rivals to Lovers/Idiots In Love, kissing, pet names

A/N: Thank you to the lovely anonymous person who requested this🩵

Written on my phone. My apologies for any mistakes.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creator.

“We’re going to try something different.” Dr. Raynor moves her notebook aside to lean her arms on the table. “I’m going to have you two do a teamwork exercise. In order to do that I need you two to face each other.” She says.

“Why?” You asked.

“Don’t question me and just do it.” She says.

You and Bucky turned your chairs around so you two were facing each other.

“Closer.” She says.

“Seriously?” Bucky says.

Dr. Raynor nodded. You and Bucky furrowed your eyebrows, already calling bullshit on it before moving closer to each other. You two were so close that your legs were touching his.

“Now, tell each other what you think each other’s deepest, darkest fears are.” She says.

You and Bucky sat there staring each other down for a moment in complete silence.

“What are you- are you guys having a staring contest?” Dr. Raynor asks.

You guys didn’t answer her. You two just continued to stare each other down in silence.

“Knock it off!” She snaps her fingers to get you guys to stop it. “Talk.” She orders.

Bucky rolled his eyes at her before looking at you, waiting for you to say something. You sighed loudly at the Super Soldier.

“Well, for starters, I think you’re a fraud.” You say.

“I’m a lot of things, but a fraud isn’t one of them.” He says.

“I also think you’re incapable of giving love and receiving it.” You say.

Bucky listened to everything else you listed off about him, which he thinks is simply untrue. He just chuckles and smirks facetiously at you.

“You wanna know what I think, doll?” He leans forward. “I think your biggest fear is admitting that you’re in love with me.” He says with the same facetious smirk on his face.

“I- that’s-” You couldn’t find the words you wanted to say, because he’s right and he knows it. “That’s not true.” You lied.

“Don’t try lying your way out of this. I heard my name come up in your conversation with Sam’s sister.” He says.

“You shouldn’t listen to or eavesdrop on people’s conversations.” You say.

“I wasn’t listening or eavesdropping. I heard you say it. I have enhanced hearing.” He says, sounding sarcastic.

You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it. You tilted your head back, groaning loudly. Bucky smirks to himself and leaned back in his chair.

“You’re so fucking annoying!” You say, almost shouting.

“The feeling is mutual, doll face.” Bucky says.

“How many damn times have I told you not to call me those stupid pet names?” You say, narrowing your eyes at him.

“I call you those little pet names just to annoy you.” He says, the facetious smirk returning to his face.

“How the hell did Steve even put up with you years ago?” You asked without realizing what you just said.

The smirk dropped from Bucky’s face and he clenched his jaw. Your eyes widened, realizing that the Steve subject is still sensitive for him. You two sat in silence. Dr. Raynor took the opportunity to write in her notebook during that silence.

“Are we done here?” Bucky asks Dr. Raynor.

“Yes, you two are dismissed.” Dr. Raynor says.

Bucky stood up from his chair, the chair making a scraping noise against the floor. You stood up and followed him.

“Bucky, wait!” You ran up to him. “I didn’t mean to bring up Steve like that.” You say.

“Don’t!” Bucky growls. “Don’t say his fucking name like you know him. You didn’t know him like I did. He was my best friend and you had to say shit like that.” He says.

“I didn’t mean to.” You say, trying to sound sincere.

“Save it.” He gets on his motorcycle. “I don’t want to fucking hear another god damn word coming from your mouth.” He says.

Bucky started his motorcycle and you stepped back when he drove way. You watched him drive away from a distance. You stood there, feeling guilty about the way you brought up Steve. You decided to leave Bucky alone and try to talk to him tomorrow.

You and Bucky have been rivals for as long as you two can remember. You two never got along. Steve tried everything to get you two to get along, but nothing worked. It only seemed to get worse after he left. The only thing you guys can agree on is work and that’s it.

The next day, you went to Sam’s and his sister’s house, hoping that Bucky was there and he was. His motorcycle is in the driveway. You knocked on the door and patiently waited for someone to open it. Sarah opened the door, smiling when she seen you. She gave you a hug before stepping aside to let you come inside.

“Is Bucky here?” You asked, fiddling with your fingers. “I seen his motorcycle in the driveway.” You say.

“Yes. He’s in the back with Sam.” Sarah says.

You followed her to the backyard. Bucky and Sam were throwing the shield around.

“Bucky, you have a visitor.” Sarah says.

Bucky stared at you in silence. You could sense that he was still mad about what you said yesterday.

“Let’s leave them alone, Sam.” She says.

“But I want to hear what they’re going to say to each other.” Sam says.

“Come on!” She says, grabbing his arm and pulled him towards the house.

“Ow! Ok, ok!” He says.

You and Bucky stood in silence. You were trying to build up the courage to apologize to him.

“Are you going to say something or are you just going to waste my time like you always do?” Bucky says.

You looked down at the ground before looking back at him. You know you have to apologize and you might as well get it over with. You took a deep breath before saying anything.

“I’m sorry about how I brought up Steve yesterday.” You started. “I know how sensitive that subject is for you and I shouldn’t have said that. I know he’s your best friend and you miss him.” You say, sounding sincere.

“You should be sorry. You were totally out of line for it.” He says.

“I know and I’m sorry.” You apologized. “It’s just- you get to me sometimes and I didn’t realize I said it.” You say.

The facetious smirk grew on Bucky’s face when you said he gets to you sometimes. That’s enough to confirm that you’re in love with him without having to say it.

“I get to you sometimes?” Bucky asks, smirking facetiously.

“I- yes!” You say, feeling your cheeks heat up.

“So I was right about what I said yesterday.” He took a couple steps closer to you. “You’re in love with me.” He says, the facetious smirk staying on his face.

Meanwhile, Sam and Sarah were watching from the kitchen window.

“$20 that Y/N kisses Bucky.” Sarah says.

“$20 that Bucky walks away from her.” Sam says.

“I’m not too sure about that. Y/N knows what she wants when she wants it.” She says.

You stared up at Bucky, feeling your heat hammering in your chest. The tension between the two was so thick that it could be cut with a knife.

“Are you going to admit it or what, doll face?” Bucky asks.

You didn’t say anything. You grasped the collar of his blue henley and pulled him down for a kiss. Bucky’s hands found their way to your waist, pulling you against his body. Your lips moved in sync with his. It felt everything around you two was moving in slow motion.

“I told you so! Pay up, Sam!” Sarah says, loud enough for you and Bucky to hear, making you two laugh against each other’s lips.

Sam made a grumbling noise and took his wallet out of his pocket, taking $20 out of it and gave it to his sister. Sarah smiles proudly to herself cause she won a bet against her brother.

“Boys, who wants ice cream?!” Sarah asks, calling out for her sons.

The kiss was so passionate that you and Bucky were breathless by the time you two pulled away from the kiss, looking deep in each other’s eyes.

“I really am sorry about how I brought up Steve.” You apologized again.

“It’s ok. I forgive you.” Bucky says.

Bucky brought a hand up to your cheek, caressing it and rubbing his thumb against your skin.

“Does this mean you want to be mine?” He asks softly.

“Didn’t that kiss prove it for you?” You asked, answering his question with a question.

Bucky chuckles and pecks your lips softly, which turned into another passionate kiss.

“Hey!” Sam shouts. “Keep it PG13! There’s kids here!” He shouts, making you and Bucky laugh against each other’s lips.

🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖🪖

-Bucky’s Doll

[akariamai]

Familiar [Part 1]

Part 2, Part 3

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x immortal!reader

Word Count: 1238

You watched the world you’d always known become public knowledge. It was laughable in which the US government feeds their citizens lies, lies that the enhanced individuals are a new construct, lies that they only started to appear in the age of heroes. Enhanced individuals have always existed. They always walked among the non enhanced. The only difference is more dangers have bubbled onto the surface and now they’re trying to save face.

Steve Rogers might’ve been the world’s first superhero but he was not the first enhanced individual. He was made into one and celebrated for it. Acting as a poster boy for the US government to recruit young men with a romanticized version of war. Those who were born enhanced were often murdered, caught, or experimented on. The history of the lost to never see a glimpse of light.

You had known Steve once upon a time. Your paths crossed whenever you found yourself in New York. You heard him getting beat up in the alley next to the theater being saved by his friend, Bucky Barnes. It was a rather lackluster moment and you had no idea how important to history they both would become. He was but a boy back then, wanting to be a hero but limited by his body. 

Throughout years of torture and experiments by the government, you readily escaped and made a life for yourself. Hidden away from the government and living in isolation. At times, you would gather enough courage to leave your safe haven and explore the ever changing world around you.

Money makes the world go round and round. At least, that’s what those in control want the population to comprehend and accept. You had seen the value of money diminish and the cost of necessities increase unjustifiably. The concept itself is of greed as no person should have to justify their worth with the amount of cash in your bank. You had lived through the rise and fall of empires, the extinction of a plethora of animals and insects, and witnessed the destruction in the wake of greed for money.

As money had never been an issue for you, you’d donate religiously to charities in feeding and sheltering the homeless in various parts of the world, created multiple scholarships for students to get free-rides to their dream schools, funded research centers and other organizations. You had far too much money for just an individual.

Once you explored the world for what it had to offer, you became bored. Traveling was once exciting but the thrill dissipated. You now occupy your time reading books, mindlessly scrolling on social media, watching television, and other niche hobbies. You had so much time to do everything you’d ever wanted and search for the answers to questions that remained unanswered.

You found yourself in a decent routine to keep yourself from going insane. It might’ve been considered boring to the average person but you had done so much in your life, any downtime was welcomed with open arms and a bottle of whiskey.

“Do you think they’re here?” Hushed voices whispered in the distance. The forest creatures that usually surround your home remain quiet, not knowing what to think about the strangers walking through their forest. They had become familiar to you but were still wary of humans.

“Well-kept house in the middle of nowhere and Red Wing picking up one heat signature would suggest so.” It was another voice. A voice you knew you heard before. It was a voice from the TV. You’d realized the voice belonged to Sam Wilson, an apparent pararescue who fought with the Avengers to save the world. You didn’t know if he was considered to be an Avenger though. After the whole debacle with the Sokovia Accords, the breaking up of the Avengers, and the fight with Thanos, the question of the status of the group has been unclear.

“You’d think they know we’re here?” The voices became louder as they inched closer to her safe haven. You wanted them out. To leave you alone with your thoughts. You didn’t want strangers to mess up what you had built for yourself. They needed to leave.

You recognized the other voice as well. It belonged to an old acquaintance. He flirted with you after he saved his friend, Steve, from being beaten in an alleyway. It seemed like such a natural occurrence but hearing him now was a bit surreal. He probably wouldn’t recognize you after all he’s been through. You remember when he was falsely blamed for the bombing of the Vienna Bombing. Sloppy work for someone’s who’s identity remained hidden for so long, only whispers of the nickname Hydra had given him. Idiots. You thought bitterly. Bucky was such a kind man turned into a mindless weapon. You wished he would have lived a long and beautiful life without the violence or suffering that he so rightfully deserves.

He sighed, annoyed by the questions, “Yes. They’re probably aware of our presence. [Reader] we know you're in there. We just want to talk.” You didn’t listen. You couldn’t move. No one was supposed to know your name. You’d messed up sometime during the rise of technology, you assumed. It was easier to go under the radar before technology developed and expanded to the point where your face could be caught on camera. 

Your mind began to race as they made it to your porch and knocked gently. You couldn’t outrun a supersoldier. Your powers only consisted of immortality which you found to be rather lonely and painful. You slowly crept to the door, your arm uncontrollably shaking as you reached to open it. You were opening the door of uncertainty and allowing the outside world to enter. “What do you want?” It was the question that echoed underneath your breath.

Sam gave you a gentle simple, “I’m Sam Wilson and this is my associate Bucky Barnes.” He gestured to his companion. “We don’t mean to intrude but we have a couple of questions only you would be able to answer.” Bucky stared long and hard at your face. His eyebrows scrunching together as he tried to pinpoint why you were so familiar. “We have evidence to suggest that the soldier serum was recreated. Since you have been alive for a decent amount of time, have you heard of anything that’ll be able to help us?”

Of course you had heard of multiple instances of scientists, from all around the world, desperately searching for the answer to recreate the super soldier serum. Many had failed leaving a trail of dead bodies of unwilling victims.

“You should check with your own government.” You bluntly replied. The American government had tried to keep the experiments of their own soldiers a secret but people talk. Guilt overcomes silence. While the media caught smoke of what happened behind closed doors, drunken secrets were spilled for all to listen and you listened. “I know they tried… relentlessly.”

“You look familiar.” Bucky’s voice rang, catching the attention of both Sam and you. 

Sam gave him a questioning look before observing your reaction. It was neutral. No confusion or alarm emerged in your facial expression. You look straight into Bucky’s eyes, seeing the window of his broken soul trying to mend itself piece by piece, “I’m pretty sure we've never met.” The lie slipped so smoothly that neither of them caught it.

Masterlist

[cillianate]

dancin' round the kitchen, in the refrigerator light.

(gif is not mine, credit to owner!!!)

pairing: bucky barnes x fem!reader

warnings: smoking (don't smoke, say no to drugs kids!!), nightmares, slight nudity, a mention of cancer, mentions of torture, mentions of murd3r, pretty much everything winter soldier.

summary: bucky wakes up in the middle of the night after a nightmare and aches to hold his girlfriend.

content type: blurb, one-shot

The bright red text on the digital clock read- 2:37 AM. Bucky sat up panting, his chest gleamed with sweat. As he breathed heavily, he became suddenly aware of the non-existent mellow breathing that would usually calm him down in a time like this. You weren't there. As he patted around the bed looking for you, he became increasingly worried.

Just as he got out of the bed to rummage the apartment for you, a cough comes from your balcony. Realization crossed over him. He padded his way over, donning only blue and white checkered boxers.

There you were, sitting on the railing of the balcony that over looked Brooklyn, a cigarette lodged between your index and middle finger. Your body was covered in goosebumps, made more prominent by your lack of clothing. Only your underwear and Bucky's 'The Smiths, Hatful of Hollow' T-Shirt covered your figure.

"Doll," he said, his voice coming out frailer than he had intended, "why are you up?"

"Buck. Sorry, did I wake you?" You had said, immediately putting out your cigarette.

"No its fine. I just had a nightmare. Woke up and you were gone." He calmed you. He strode to you slowly, planting his hands on your hips once he reached you.

"Oh, i'm so sorry, babe. Do you want to talk about it?" You apologized, gladly embracing him when he folded his head into your neck. The scruf he had grown over the last few months ticked your soft skin, making you let out a soft breath.

"No, it's fine. Same as usual, y'know? I get tortured, I kill someone. Whatever. Just wanted to hold you." He spoke, his deep voice rang through your body.

"It's not nothing, James. But I won't pester you. I'm here now for all of your holding needs." You responded. His eyes now looked into yours as he had separated his head from your neck.

He brought your foreheads together and said, "You should quit, those things are cancer machines."

"I know." And that was that. It was a conversation that had been brought up before, but the idea had always been that, an idea.

There, in the crisp fall air, Bucky held you for what felt like hours. The cold left both you long ago, the others body heat warming their counterpart plenty. The pair of you swayed back and forth as a silent oath of "I have you, and we'll be alright."

"We should head inside, just because I can't get sick doesn't mean I want you getting pneumonia." He said as he grabbed your rosy hand.

"But Buck, i'm not tired." You whined, as he all but dragged you back into the loft apartment.

"Well I didn't say we had to sleep, now did I, doll?" He said smugly, that smirk you'd come to know so well stretching over his tan face.

Bucky let go of your hand as he flicked on the small stereo that had found its place on your counter many months ago.

The soft lullaby of 'Graceland Too' by Phoebe Bridgers graced your ears, being the last song you had listened to from yours and Bucky's mix tape.

Bucky grabbed your waist softly, pulling you into his chest. You wrapped your arms gracefully around his neck as he swayed you slightly to the music.

For the next hour, you and Bucky danced around in the kitchen illuminated by the refrigerator light. Your serene moment soundtrack to songs you adored such as: All I Need To Hear by The 1975, False God by Taylor Swift, and Smoke Signals by Phoebe Bridgers. And though Bucky refused to admit he listened to anything other than Louis Armstrong, he silently loved them too.

Actually, he loved everything you loved. He loved you. He would shout it from any rooftop without being asked. You were his lifeline. The moment he met you, he promised himself he'd do anything to be able to hold you. Now that he could, he wouldn't be silent about it. And he wasn't.

"I love you." He whispered into your hair as he lulled you into relaxation.

"I love you too, Buck."