#The Cursed King and the Brave Martin

[jewellery-accessoriesreused]

This lovely Crown was seen first on Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson in How i met your Mother: Third Wheel (2007) and worn again on Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester in Supernatural: LARP and the Real Girl (2013) and seen again on Garwin Sanford as King in Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Heart of Stone (2013) and worn again later on Lukáš Vaculík as King Svarog in The Cursed King and the Brave Martin (2018) (O zakletém králi a odvázném Martinovi)

[historicalreusedcostumes]

This lovely Crown was seen first on Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson in How i met your Mother: Third Wheel (2007) and worn again on Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester in Supernatural: LARP and the Real Girl (2013) and seen again on Garwin Sanford as King in Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Heart of Stone (2013) and worn again later on Lukáš Vaculík as King Svarog in The Cursed King and the Brave Martin (2018) (O zakletém králi a odvázném Martinovi)

[ouatreusedcostumes]

This lovely Crown was seen first on Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson in How i met your Mother: Third Wheel (2007) and worn again two Times in Supernatural: LARP and the Real Girl (2013), First worn on Felicia Day as Charlie Bradbury and later on Jensen Ackles as Dean Winchester.

Later the crown is worn on Garwin Sanford as King in Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Heart of Stone (2013) and worn again later in fairy tale on Lukáš Vaculík as King Svarog in The Cursed King and the Brave Martin (2018) (O zakletém králi a odvázném Martinovi)

[marytunno]

-read below-

BEFORE WINTER CAME

He had been the king and she… she had those lovely golden curls… yellow like the crops now growing on the battlefields… yellow like his banners… She had pretended to not know who he was… as if no one in the whole city didn’t recognize the man that had killed the dragon and won the throne… he had called her by a different name as he spent himself in her, her back against the hard walls of the tavern, her gown hiked up. She had smiled and giggled the whole time, feeling like the luckiest girl in the kingdom, the voices of the patrons inside singing some drinking song, his kisses tasting like the expensive wine she had served just a few hours before. It felt like a song, his eyes so blue, his arms so strong and even if it was just for only one night she had been loved by a king. He had paid her well before leaving,  golden coins in her hands, a playful tug on her yellow hair as he disappeared into the night. 

-

Ned loved her, Catelynn was sure of it, breathing in his scent as he lay beside her. She loved him as well but she had hated him too, screamed at him with all her fury, cried salty tears and cursed his honour, now as she rested in his arms it all seemed to fade, her anger, her fears. Her beautiful first boy was growing healthy and strong, and one day he would have been lord, him, not some bastard, and her second, so beautiful and delicate, her eyes the exact shade of her Tully blue. Her husband kissed softly her brow and she closed her eyes smiling, warm in the coldest land of the realm. She wondered if she could be pregnant again, wishing with all her heart for it to be true, maybe this time the baby would have taken the Stark look, she was sure her Ned would have been happy about it. A beautiful baby with dark hair and grey eyes, a wolf.

-

It wasn’t like Gendry liked trouble, even less he liked his mother telling him how his father would have beaten him if only he had been there. When he felt mean he talked back, he told her that he wasn’t scared about her threats, his father was not coming back, not to him, not to her, she always looked very sad when he acted like that and he felt guilty. He wondered if there was something wrong with him, a little monster under his skin making him say bad things and punch the other kids when they called him names. A monster that made him hate everyone and everything. Well, Gendry didn’t hate his mum, she was nice to him, even when she was tired after work, even when he came back home all dirty and with a bleeding knee, she sang some songs about knights and heroes and for a moment he allowed himself to dream, to imagine a future where he was a brave knight helping the people. He didn’t like much the other kids of Flea Bottom, one of the other tavern girls had once called him "little bastard" and the name had stuck, at first, he had jumped on everyone that called him that but soon he had realized that he couldn’t fight a whole kingdom that thought the same thing. One day, suddenly, his mum was gone, a bad fever had taken her at night, he had been happy at first when she had stopped coughing and crying, letting him sleep in the cot they shared. In the morning she had been cold, another kid would have cried but he couldn’t, he went for the owner of the tavern and soon his mum was taken away leaving him all alone. 

-

Arya loved the mornings in Winterfell, listening to the wind outside her windows, the smell of freshly baked pies and tarts from the kitchens, warm in her furs ready to step barefoot on the pavement and go wake everyone up. She loved sitting at her father’s table breaking their fast, listening to her father’s men, smiling with a full mouth, making her brothers laugh and making her mother shake her head. People around the castle called her Underfoot, always running around asking questions and making friends with stewards and kitchen maids. Sometimes it was easier to be friends with them than with her peers, the ladies she should have been friends with. If only she had been good at being a lady, forcing her wrong hand to stitch pretty like Sansa or Jeyne could, if only she could stay sitting still listening to Septa Mordane and her lessons, she wanted to be a good child, make her mother and father happy but sometimes she felt so wrong. But when everything else seemed grey and sombre there was Jon, always there to make her smile, her favourite brother, her favourite person in the whole world. She had ruined her dress again, this time it had been mudd, after a summer snow the ground had been wet and soft and she had run on it, looking for wildflowers under the melting puddles of snow. Arya’s father had hidden a laugh looking at her all dishevelled running to him, grass and purple flowers in hand as a gift, he had told her he loved the wild in her, Arya knew he did.

-

The boy had spent most of his days working, his arms aching and his skin burning with the heat of the forge. After his mum had died he had been sure he would have ended up on the streets that smelled like shit and blood, nothing good was ever going to happen to him there. Then a day a weird man, his face hidden by his fancy cloak, had taken him to master Mott, he had told him he knew his mother and that had been enough explanation for Gendry. His master had been harsh but respected hard work so even when he cursed at Gendry for his bigmouth or his stubbornness he had started to like the boy. Working and hammering hot steel had always been easier than being friends with the other apprentices, easier than smiling and bowing at fat lords. Someone had told him he acted like a scowling bull and he had liked it, in his head it made sense, so when he had enough material he had started working on his helmet shaping it like a bull’s head. Master Mott had asked him if he wanted to wear it to war and another apprenticed boy had laughed at him telling him how he needed a sword too if he wanted to dream about fighting, but Mott had smiled and told Gendry the smartest thing was to protect one’s head, even if his was already as thick as heads came. A man with bad teeth and a bald man had come to see him for reasons unknown to him. His master had scolded him when he had acted standoffish telling him how they had been lords but for what Gendry cared he could have met the king himself and still would have acted as rude as he wanted to. One day again another lord had come to him, like the old one he had been hand of the king, eyes as dark as winter were staring at him, Gendry had heard about Lord Stark’s cold gaze but there had been something different in those eyes, something warm. 

-

Leaving the north had been a mistake, at first Arya had thought about it as an adventure, her first chance to see the world, but the prince had been a monster, her sister a liar and not even her father had stopped the Hound from hurting her friend. She had never felt as alone as she had felt in the busy King’s Landing, Jon far far away at the wall, her mother and brothers safe at home, her father busy with saving the kingdom from its own king. As she explored the halls of the Red Keep she felt something wrong in the air, in the way people lied to each other, in the heat that made her skin sticky, in the purple under her father’s eyes, whispers echoing through the chambers where once had been dragons. Leaving home had been a mistake, Arya was sure of it as she ran away from the queen’s guards, her heart thundering in her chest, holding Needle and a practice sword ready to use them if necessary, hoping to be strong enough to save her father and sister and take them back to Winterfell where they belonged. The lessons from Syrio gave her strength as her whole world was crumbling down on her, she had to be strong, she had to be fierce, she had to be quick, even if she was scared she could not let that fear cut through her, she could not let her fear stop her. More than ever she felt like a child, lost and alone but more than ever she felt like she could become something more, she had to become something more, she was a wolf and she was not going to be afraid.

-

But this was before... before kings clashed and before horrors rose, before the long summer ended… before destinies crossed each other and howls filled the nights of traitors… one thing is true, in the end, no matter where one started from winter is coming for everyone.

Don't really know what I'm doing, I hope you enjoyed this fic <3 you will find the works for this appreciation week also here:

[dustedmagazine]

Dusted Mid-Year 2023, Part Three (The Lists)

Natural Information Society

Swapping records is fun, but when it comes down to it, we like what we like.  What’s that?  Glad you asked.  Read on for our writers’ mid-year favorites.    

Jennifer Kelly

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Robert Forster — The Candle and the Flame (Tapete) 

The Drin — Today My Friend You Drunk the Venom (Feel It)

En Attendant Ana — Principia (Trouble in Mind)

Stella Kola—S-T (Self-Release)

Mudhoney — Plastic Eternity (Sub Pop)

Sleaford Mods — UK Grim (Domino)

The Tubs — Dead Meat (Trouble in Mind)

Nighttime — Keeper Is the Heart (BaDaBing)

Purling Hiss — Drag on Girard (Drag City)

Lonnie Holley — Oh Me Oh My (Jagjaguwar)

The Toads—In the Wilderness (Upset the Rhythm)

Dan Melchior—Welcome to Redacted City (Midnight Cruiser)

James and the Giants—S-T (Kill Rock Stars)

Ben Chasny and Rick Tomlinson—Waves (VOIX)

Bill Meyer

Natural Information Society — Since Time Is Gravity (Eremite)

Elkhorn — On the Whole Universe in All Directions (Centripetal Force)

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Robert Forster — The Candle and the Flame (Tapete) 

The Necks — Travel (Northern Spy)

Milford Graves — Children of the Forest (Black Editions)

Peter Brötzman  Heather Leigh — Naked Nudes (Trost)

Yo La Tengo — This Stupid World (Matador)

Magic Tuber Band — Tarantism (Feeding Tube)

Drew Gardner — Flowers in Space (Feeding Tube)

Jozef Van Wissem and Jim Jarmusch — American Landscapes (Incunambulum)

Dave Rempis/Elisabeth Harnik/Tim Daisy — Earscratcher (Aerophonic)

Alasdair Roberts — Grief in the Kitchen and Mirth in the Hall (Drag City)

Jonathan Shaw

BIG BRAVE — nature morte (Thrill Jockey)

Wound Man — Human Outline (Iron Lung) 

Gel — Only Constant (Convulse)

Home Front — Games of Power (La Vida Es Un Mus)

Sleaford Mods — UK Grim (Domino)

Spirit Possession — Of the Sign… (Profound Lore)

Bryon Hayes

Yo La Tengo — This Stupid World (Matador)

Big Blood — First Aid Kit (Feeding Tube / BaDaBing)

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Califone — Villagers (Jealous Butcher)

M. Sage — Paradise Crick (RVNG Intl.)

The Reds, Pinks & Purples — The Town That Cursed Your Name (Slumberland)

John Atkinson — Energy Fields (AKP Recordings)

Joseph Allred — What Strange Flowers Grow in the Shade (Feeding Tube)

The Far Sound — The Far Sound (Centripetal Force)

Ulaan Khol — Milk Thistle (Desastre)

Powers / Pulice / Rolin — Prism (Cached Media)

Lia Kohl — The Ceiling Reposes (American Dreams)

Tim Clarke

Jana Horn — The Window Is The Dream (No Quarter)

Arrowounds — In The Octopus Pond (Lost Tribe Sound)

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Pile — All Fiction (Exploding In Sound)

Tim Hecker — No Highs (Kranky)

Califone — Villagers (Jealous Butcher)

King Krule — Space Heavy (XL/Matador)

This Is The Kit — Careful Of Your Keepers (Rough Trade)

Cory Hanson — Western Cum (Drag City)

Andy Shauf — Norm (Anti-)

Patrick Masterson

Pile —  All Fiction (Exploding in Sound)

Yves Tumor — Praise a Lord Who Chews But Which Does Not Consume; (Or Simply, Hot Between Worlds) (Warp)

Wednesday — Rat Saw God (Dead Oceans)

Jayda G — Guy (Ninja Tune)

Ryuichi Sakamoto — 12 (Milan)

Malla — Fresko (Solina)

Skech185 — He Left Nothing for the Swim Back (Backwoodz Studioz)

Emahoy Tsege Mariam Gebru — Jerusalem (Mississippi)

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Andrea — Due in Color (Ilian Tape)

Memphis LK — Too Much Fun EP (Remote Control)

BigXthaPlug — Amar (United Masters)

Andrew Forell

Algiers — Shook (Matador)

King Vision Ultra — Shook World (Hosted by Algiers)

Asher Gamedze — Turbulence & Pulse (International Anthem)

99LETTERS — Makafushigi (Disciples)

The Drin— Today My Friend You Drunk the Venom (Drunken Sailor)

Comet Gain — The Misfit Jukebox (Tapete)

billy woods & Kenny Segal — Maps (Backwoodz Studioz)

Kevin Richard Martin — Above the Clouds (self-released)

SQÜRL — Silver Haze (Sacred Bones)

The Murder Capital — Gigi’s Recovery (Human Season)

Parasite Jazz — Paradise Jazz (Disques de la Spirale)

Christian Carey

The Reds, Pinks, and Purples — The Town that Cursed Your Name (Slumberland)

Aaron Cassidy —  A Way of Making Ghosts (Kairos)

Arrowounds —  In the Octopus Pond (Settled Scores)

V/A – Red Hot and Ra: Nuclear War LP (Red Hot)

Oval —  Romantiq (Thrill Jockey)

Meg Baird —  Furling (Drag City)

Black Duck —  S/T (Thrill Jockey)

Mother, Sister, Daughter —  Musica Secreta (Lucky Music)

Natural Information Society – Since Time is Gravity (Eremite)

Alasdair Roberts —  Grief in the Kitchen and Mirth in the Hall (Drag City)

Fever Ray —  Radical Romantics (Mute)

James Romig —  Spaces (Sawyer Editions)

Brad Mehldau —  Your Mother Should Know (Nonesuch)

Nina Berman and Steve Beck —  Milton Babbitt: Works for Treble Voice and Piano (New Focus)

Marc Ducret —  Palm Sweat (Out of Your Head)

Jennifer Grim —  Through Broken Time (New Focus)

Erkki — Sven Tüür: Canticum Canticorum Caritatis (Alpha Classics)

James Ilgenfritz —  #entrainments (Frequent Seams)

Brandon Lopez —  vilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevilevile (TAO Forms)

Lonnie Holley —  Oh Me Oh My (Jagjaguwar)

John Liberatore —  Catch Somewhere (New Focus Recordings)

Sebastian Rochford, Kit Downes —  A Short Diary (ECM Records)

Frederic Rzewski —  Late Piano Works (Naxos)

Rebecca Saunders —  Skin (NMC)

Guided by Voices —  La La Land (self— released)

Susan Narucki and Donald Berman —  This Island (Avie)

Chamber Music From Hell —  Chris Opperman (Purple Cow)

Elkhorn —  On the Whole Universe in All Directions (Centripetal Force)

Purling Hiss —  Drag on Girard (Drag City)

Caterina Barbieri —  Myuthafoo (light-years)

Yo La Tengo — This Stupid World (Matador)

Ian Mathers

Fifteen, in alphabetical order:

Aarktica — Paeans (Projekt)

Acid King — Beyond Vision (Blues Funeral)

ALL HANDS_MAKE LIGHT — “Darling the Dawn” (Constellation)

Avalon Emerson — & the Charm (Another Dove)

Brìghde Chaimbeul — Carry Them With Us (Tak:til)

The Drin — Today My Friend You Drunk the Venom (Feel It)

Ladytron — Time’s Arrow (Cooking Vinyl)

loscil // Lawrence English — Colours of Air (Kranky)

Meg Baird — Furling (Drag City)

Mute Duo — Migrant Flocks (American Dreams)

The National — First Two Pages of Frankenstein (4AD)

Tacoma Park — Tacoma Park (Self Released)

Tørrfall — Tørrfall (De Pene Inngang)

Yo La Tengo — This Stupid World (Matador)

Yves Tumor — Praise a Lord Who Chews but Which Does Not Consume; (Or Simply, Hot Between Worlds) (Warp)

Derek Taylor

New releases

Kirk Knuffke & Joe McPhee Quartet + 1 — Keep the Dream Up (Fundacja Sluchaj)

Natural Information Society — Time is Gravity (Eremite/Aguirre)

Aruán Ortiz — Serranias — Sketchbook for Piano Trio (Intakt)

Mark Dresser — Tines of Change (Pyroclastic)

Andrew Cyrille — Music Delivery/Percussion (Intakt)

Steve Millhouse — The Undwinding (Steeplechase) 

Archival Releases

The Jazz Doctors — Intensive Care/Prescriptions Filled: The Billy Bang Quartet Sessions 1983/1984 (Cadillac)

Milford Graves w/ Arthur Doyle & Hugh Glover — Children of the Forest (Black Editions)

Abdul Wadud — By Myself (Bisharra/Gotta Groove)

Sirone — Artistry (Of the Cosmos/Moved By Sound)

Marion Brown — Mary Ann: Live in Bremen 1969 (Moosicus)

Steve Swell’s Fire Into Music — For Jemeel: Fire From the Road (2005-2006) (RogueArt)

Margaret Welsh

Wheatie Mattiasich — Old Glow (Open Mouth)

Rozi Plain — Prize (Memphis Industries)

Glass Triangle — Blue and Sun-lights  (Relative Pitch)

Andy Shauf — Norm (Anti)

Yo La Tengo — This Stupid World (Matador)

Horse Jumper of Love —Heartbreak Rules (Run for Cover)

Bill Orcutt  — Jump On It (Palilalia)

Lana Del Rey — Did You Know That There’s A Tunnel Under Ocean Blvd (Interscope)

[horizon-verizon]

When the ravens brought word of the battle back to the Red Keep, the green council hurriedly convened. All of the Sea Snake’s warnings had proved true. Casterly Rock, Highgarden, and Oldtown had been slow to reply to the king’s demand for more armies. When they did, they offered excuses and prevarications in the place of promises. The Lannisters were embroiled in their war against the Red Kraken, the Hightowers had lost too many men and had no capable commanders, little Lord Tyrell’s mother wrote to say that she had reason to doubt the loyalty of her son’s bannermen, and “being a mere woman, am not myself fit to lead a host to war.” Ser Tyland Lannister, Ser Marston Waters, and Ser Julian Wormwood had been dispatched across the narrow sea to seek after sellswords in Pentos, Tyrosh, and Myr, but none had yet returned. King Aegon II would soon stand naked before his enemies, all of the king’s men knew. Bloody Ben Blackwood, Kermit Tully, Sabitha Frey, and their brothers-in-victory were preparing to resume their advance upon the city, and only a few days behind them came Lord Cregan Stark and his northmen. The Braavosi fleet carrying the Arryn host had departed Gulltown and was sailing toward the Gullet, where only young Alyn Velaryon stood in its way...and the loyalty of Driftmark could not be relied upon. “Your Grace,” the Sea Snake said, when the rump of the once proud green council had assembled, “you must surrender. The city cannot endure another sack. Save your people and save yourself. If you abdicate in favor of Prince Aegon, he will allow you to take the black and live out your life with honor on the Wall.” “Will he?” King Aegon said. Munkun tells us he sounded hopeful. His mother entertained no such hope. “You fed his mother to your dragon,” she reminded her son. “The boy saw it all.” The king turned to her desperately. “What would you have me do?” “You have hostages,” the Queen Dowager replied. “Cut off one of the boy’s ears and send it to Lord Tully. Warn them he will lose another part for every mile they advance.” “Yes,” Aegon II said. “Good. It shall be done.” He summoned Ser Alfred Broome, who had served him so well on Dragonstone. “Go and see to it, ser.” As the knight took his leave, the king turned to Corlys Velaryon. “Tell your bastard to fight bravely, my lord. If he fails me, if any of these Braavosi pass the Gullet, your precious Lady Baela shall lose some parts as well.” The Sea Snake did not plead, or curse, or threaten. He nodded stiffly, rose, and took his leave. Mushroom says he exchanged a look with the Clubfoot as he went, but Mushroom was not present, and it seems most unlikely that a man as seasoned as Corlys Velaryon would act so clumsily at such a moment. For Aegon’s day was done, though he had yet to grasp it. The turncloaks in his midst had put their plans in motion the moment they learned of Lord Baratheon’s defeat upon the kingsroad.

Fire and Blood, by George R.R. Martin, pg 563-565 [Aegon II’s Death PT.1]

[spacedykez]

songs that remind me of my blorbos, tma edition: Crow Goes Through Xyr Music Library And Assigns Songs Based 100% On Vibes

most of these are not 100% accurate but listen they are accurate in my heart and thats what matters (why did i do this? i got bored thats why)

jonathan j. jarchivist sims I Talk In My Sleep (Crane Wives) creature (half-alive) Brave As a Noun (AJJ) Oh My God (Alec Benjamin) My Demons (STARSET) [ft. jmart] Don't Wanna Be (The Score) The Fear (The Score) Who I Am (The Score) Achilles Come Down (Gang Of Youths) Rät (Penelope Scott) Overwhelmed (Royal & the Serpent) [we all project onto him shut up] Lotta True Crime (Penelope Scott) [heh. heh.] Mama's Gun (Glass Animals) Gasoline (Halsey)

martin k. blackwood Cold Is The Night (the oh hellos) Welcome Home (derivakat)

jmart The Killing Kind (mariana's trench) Curses (Crane Wives) See You Again (Wiz Kalifa) Take You Down (ILLENIUM) Hello My Old Heart (The Oh Hellos) Little Talks (Of Monsters and Men) Mr Loverman (Ricky Montgomery) [post mag200 ;)] Waiting For Love (Avicii) On And On (The Score) Don't You Dare Forget the Sun (Get Scared) [Martin singing 2 Jon]

tma in general everybody wants to rule the world (lorde) house of memories (p!atd) soldiers (rachel platten) [fits the ending of tma] discord (the living tombstone) [the eyepocalypse] the nights (avicii) weight of the world (shayfer james) [its the entities. trust me] happy face (jagwar twin)

extremely fucking specific scenarios that fit none of the above Rule #4 - Fish Inside A Birdcage [s1, Jon is singing it, Elias is "[his] brother always singing [him] songs." martin is his brother "carrying him from these walls and showing him the world outside." listen. LISTEN. do u. do u get me.]

the entities [Spiral] I Can't Decide (Scissor Sisters) [Spiral] Kiss Your Dreams Goodbye (Derivakat) [Spiral] Wires (The Neigborhood) [Spiral] In My Head (Derivakat) [Spiral] Teeth (5SOS) [Web] Chess Board (Amanda Fagan) [Hunt] Animals (Maroon 5) [THIS ONES ACTUALLY ACCURATE] [Hunt] Revolution (The Score) [Stranger] Wolf In Sheep's Clothing (Set It Off) [Stranger] Strange (The Score) [Stranger] Kill The Lights (Set It Off) [Lonely] Mind Is A Prison (Alec Benjamin) [Lonely] Let Me Down Slowly (Alec Benjamin) [Flesh] Masochism Tango (Tom Lehrer) [Flesh] Body (Mother Mother) [Desolation] Fireborn (Derivakat) [Desolation] Play With Fire (Sam Tinnesz) [Desolation] Choke (IDKHOWBUTTHEYFOUNDME) [Desolation] Arsonist's Lullaby

[Slaughter] You're Gonna Go Far, Kid (The Offspring)

[End] Another One Bites The Dust (Queen)

ELIAS MOTHERFUCKING BOUCHARD RAT BASTARD AVATAR OF THE WHORE. How Bad Can I Be (The Lorax) Be Prepared (Lion King) Oh No (Mariana and the Diamonds) you should see me in a crown (Billie Eilish) Can I Get A Witness (SonReal) Feeling Good (Micheal Buble) People I Don't Like (UPSAHL)

[twistedtummies2]

Christopher Lee: A Sinister Centenary - Number 16

Welcome to Christopher Lee: A Sinister Centenary! Over the course of May, I will be counting down My Top 31 Favorite Performances by my favorite actor, the late, great Sir Christopher Lee, in honor of his 100th Birthday. Although this fine actor left us a few years ago, his legacy endures, and this countdown is a tribute to said legacy! We’re halfway through the countdown now, ladies and gentlemen! Today’s Subject, My 16th Favorite Christopher Lee Performance: King Vladimir and the Evil Sorcerer from Faerie Tale Theatre.

For anyone who may not know, “Faerie Tale Theatre” was a television series made in the 80s, which retold various fairy-tales and short fantasy classics. Every episode featured guest star actors (and sometimes even guest directors – Francis Ford Coppola and Tim Burton each directed episodes of the show), and – working with a low budget – was handled in a deliberately “theatrical” manner, hence the title of the show. I absolutely loved this series, growing up; I used to rent VHS tapes of some of the episodes from my local Hollywood Video rental store (yeah, remember when those things existed?), and at one point we actually owned the complete series on DVD…but at some point we sadly lost it. Thankfully, most of the show is easily available online, in various places, including YouTube. One of my favorite episodes of the series is actually based on a rather obscure fairy-tale. The episode is entitled “The Boy Who Left Home to Find Out About the Shivers.” (Given the absurd title of this one, I’m just gonna call it “Shivers” for short here on out.) The story focuses on a young farmboy, Martin, who is quite literally fearless: he is scared of absolutely nothing, and doesn’t really even understand fear as a concept. So, he goes on an adventure to find out just what fear is. The TV adaptation for Faerie Tale Theatre adapts the story in a way that really becomes a tribute to classic horror movies. The setting of the story in the episode is Transylvania, for reasons I think you can likely imagine. The cast features several actors known for their work in horror movies by that time; Vincent Price is the Narrator, David Warner plays a crooked innkeeper, Jeff Corey plays Martin’s father, Jack Riley is the Sexton, et cetera, et cetera. Heck, the episode seems almost PROPHETIC of future eerie actors: Peter MacNicol plays Martin himself, and while he was just getting started in screen acting at the time, he would later become known for playing a variety of haunting characters and appearing in equally haunting material. In the middle of all this is Christopher Lee, who plays two characters in the story: first, there’s King Vladimir V. The King is actually a descendant of none other than Vlad Dracula, but has forsworn living in Castle Dracula for years. Why? Because the castle is haunted by a variety of spooks and goblins, all of whom pose a potential danger to anyone who stays there. The King has offered a reward to anyone brave enough to stay in the Castle for three days: only a person who can do this (and survive) can rid the Castle of its curse and thus reclaim it for its rightful heirs. With help from the King’s daughter, the Princess – whom Vladimir is HIGHLY protective of – Martin agrees, specifically because he’s hoping he WILL be scared. During his stay in the castle, Martin eventually encounters the source of the curse: an Evil Sorceror, who apparently is also a Dracula, and who cursed the Castle because he, himself, was ironically afraid of losing his daughter years ago. On the third night, Martin faces off with the Sorceror, and it is only by defeating the dark wizard’s ghost that he is finally able to rid the castle of its fearful spectres. Ironically, none of this scares Martin in the least…it’s not until he realizes he’s going to get married to the Princess that he suddenly understands what fear is. Take that hilarious irony however you please. XD In my opinion, this is probably one of Christopher Lee’s funniest performances, if not his funniest. As King Vladimir, he’s wonderfully frustrated and pompous, but you also totally feel the sincerity in his development, as he comes to like Martin and shows obvious care for his daughter. The way he and David Warner as the Innkeeper bounce off each other is also really darn sweet. As the Evil Sorceror…take Saruman and make him a Looney Tunes character. That is basically Lee’s Evil Sorceror in a nutshell. I think my favorite part of his performance there is when he’s defeated: he literally gets beaten by getting tied up in a rug and tickled to the point of surrender, I’m not joking. And when he’s freed from the rug after giving up? “Uh…how about best two out of three?” If you ever needed proof Christopher Lee could do comedy as well as villainy, Faerie Tale Theatre is the PERFECT starting point to check. Tomorrow, the countdown continues, as I present my choice for Number 15!

[cardest]

Norway playlist

The trolls have gathered around to see the Mother North dance at midnight in the Trollheimen fjellområde as they listen to this epic NORWAY pllaylist I put together! Takk!

Are you ready? Have you your wits? This is the it.... NORWAY PLAYLIST songs are right here to listen to: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1_gH0U66TKasbEjdbkPxeW7 001 Folket Bortafor Nordavinden - Ur Is Ka Ha So 002 Satyricon - Commando 003 Arcturus -  Fall of Man 004 Dimmu Borgir The Serpentine Offering 005 Borknagar -  The Eye Of Oden 006 NORDJEVEL - Sunset Glow 007 WArduna - Fehu 008 Z-off - Hurra For Norge Norsk punkrock 009 Shakma - Night of the coven 010 Duivelspack - Yggdrasill 011 Enslaved - Path To Vanir 012 Kalenda Maya- Villemann Magnhild 013 Mental As Anything - Beserk Warriors 014 Chontaraz - Rondamauh 015 Manes -  Menn På Helveg Hastar 016 Norske Gutter - Hvem Faen Tror Du Du Er 017 Iron Maiden - Invasion 018 Solefald - Oslo Melancholy 019 Immortal - Sons of Northern Darkness 020 Slegest - Blodets Varme Gjennom Meg 021 Old Man's Child - The Millenium King 022 Covenant - Bizarre cosmic industries 023 In The Woods - I Am Your Flesh 024 Satyricon -  Ageless Northern Spirit 025 Golden Core - Rúnir Skal Rísta 026 Inferno - Metal Attack 027 Nordvegen - Ullensvang 028 Arcturus -  Ad absurdum 029 Ánne Máddji Heatta - Madji  at Dawn Light 030 Eldrim - Heimkomst 031 Hedvig Mollestad Trio - Approaching / On Arrival 032 Sirenia -  The End Of It All 033 Byrdi - Solsnu (feat. Kjell Braaten) 034 Bard Spec - Fire Tongue 035 Eirik Jarl - Norse song 036 The Open Mind - Thor, The Thunder God 037 Seidrblot - Skeggöld 038 Black Moon Circle - The Machine On The Hill 039 Sigmund Eiks - Knepphallingen (Hardingfele) 040 Satyricon -  Now, diabolical 041 Amberian Dawn - Valkyries 042 Gåte - Huldra 043 Enslaved -  Waruun 044 An Danzza - Rúnatal (Canción Rúnica de Odín) 045 Burzum -  Belus' Død 046 Abbath - Harvest Pyre 047 Aura Noir - Abbadon 048 Beatles - Norwegian Wood 049 INCULTER - COMMANDER 050 KAUNAN - Halteguten 051 Mortiis - Across The World Of Wonders 052 Skuggsa - Kvervandi 053 Covenant - Planetarium 054 Kampfar - Daimon 055 Adrian von Ziegler - Vinterns Drm 056 Blind Guardian - Valkyries 057 Ulver - The Argument, Plate 2 058 BigBang - Girl In Oslo 059 Gorgoroth - Bergtrollets Hevn 060 Emperor - Curse You All Men! 061 Tom Trussel - Oslo City Blues 062 Vazelina Bilopphøggers - Borghild 063 Dosdfall - Hemlig Vrede 064 Dimmu Borgir - Progenies of the Great Apocalypse 065 Kryst The Conqueror -  Valhalla 066 The Dogs - Oslo 067 Enslaved - Eld 068 Solefald - Loki Trickster God 069 Dunbarrow - You Knew I Was a Snake 070 A-ha - Take On Me 071 Ulver - Høyfjeldsbilde 072 Mayhem - Freezing Moon 073 Skambankt - Balladen Om Deg 074 Djerv - Headstone 075 Arcturus -  Raudt og svart 076 Øystein Sunde - Bleieskiftarbeider 077 Wardruna - Helvegen (The Way To Hel) 078 Ihsahn - Unhealer 079 Kampfar - Dominans 080 TNT - Seven Seas 081  NRK  Til Dovre faller - 1814 082 skuggsa - Rop Fra Rynda - Mlt Fra Minne 083 Iskald - Innhøstinga 084 Kvelertak -  Rogaland 085 Svarttjern - Hellig Jord 086 Renaissance - Northern Lights 087 Fred Åkerström - Oslo 088 Concrete Steps - Big Fish 089 Trevor Morris -  Northern Lights / Entry to Kattegat 090 KaadaPatton - L'absent 091 Adrian von Ziegler - Einherjer 092 Enthroned - Skjeldenland 093 Jokke og valentinerne - her kommer vintern 094 Styx - Man Of Miracles 095 Residents -  Arctic Hysteria 096 Martine Kraft - Himmelfot 097 Red Harvest -  Anatomy of the Unknown 098 Audrey Horne - Out of the City 099 Darkthrone -  Arctic Thunder 100 Trevor Morris - If I Had A Heart 101 Immortal - The Rise of Darkness 102 Sepulcher - Corporeal 103 Mysticum - LSD (from Planet Satan) 104 Empyrium - Under Dreamskies 105 Slagmaur - Norwegian Giant 106 Aeternus - Fyrndeheimen 107 Thorns - Existence 108 Solefald -  Crater of the Valkyries 109 Tristania - Libre 110 Trevor Morris -  North Sea Storm 111 Arcturus -  The Chaos Path 112 MAYHEM - A Grand Declaration Of War 113 Manegarm -  Odin Owns Ye All 114 Kampfar - Hymn 115 Dimmu Borgir -  Gateways 116 Dødheimsgard -  The Snuff Dreams Are Made Of 117 Satyricon -  The pentagram burns 118 Enslaved - Midgards Eldar 119 Folque - No har Jonsoknatta kome 120 Nekromantheon - Rise Vulcan Spectre 121 Iron Maiden -  Invaders 122 Tsjuder - Throne of the Goat 123 Einherjer - Naar aftensolen rinner 124 Mork - Holdere Av Fortet 125 Nidinger - Baldrs Draumar 126 Arcturus - Du Nordavind 127 Green Carnation - Into Deep 128 Darkthrone -  Too Old Too Cold 129 Pagans Mind - Through Osiris Eyes 130 Kvelertak - Blodtørst 131 Tristania - Year Of The Rat 132 Ulver - I Troldskog Faren Vild 133 Cirith Ungol - The troll 134 Eliwagar - Huldresagn 135 Vårsøg - Fram kom ein skreddar 136 Amethystium - Solace 137 Audrey Horne -  Bridges and Anchors 138 Gayte - Til Deg 139 Nanci Griffith - St. Olavs Gate 140 Folque - Liti Kari 141 Hin Onde - 24th of September 1155 142 Trevor Morris -  Ragnar's Sail 143 Enslaved - Ruun 144 Purple Hill Witch - Astral Booze 145 Thulsa Doom - Machine of Oslo 146 Svarttjern - Code Human 147 Leaves' Eyes -  Vinland Saga 148 Darvaza - A New Sun 149 LUMSK - DUNKER 150 Solefald - Tittentattenteksti 151 Raga Rockers    - Fritt liv 152 Isengard - Landet og Havet 153 In The Woods... - Pure 154 Communic - Conspiracy 155 Dimmu Borgir - Vredesbyrd 156 Arcturus -  The Arcturian Sign 157 Gorgoroth - Carving A Giant 158 Panopticon -  Norwegian Nights 159 Asmegin - Blodhevn 160 DumDum Boys - Lunch I Det Grønne 161 Taake - Nordbundet 162 Gehennah - Deadlights 163 Trønder Thunder - Tordenskjold 164 Årabrot - Maldorors Love 165 Misotheist - Blood Of Rats 166 Windir - 1184 167 BLOOD RED THRONE - InStructed InSanity 168 Deathhammer - Chained to Hell 169 Satyricon - Die By My Hand 170 Myrkskog - Bleeding Wrists 171 Ring Van Mobius - End of Greatness 172 Valkyrja - Crowned Serpent 173 Kjøtt - Hvit Hud / Svart Skinn 174 The 3rd And The Mortal - Why So Lonely 175 Voluspaa - Ferden Går Videre 176 Abyssic - Transition Consent 177 Myrkraverk - Nær Døden 178 Romantic Noise - Sagitario 179 Shining -  The One Inside 180 The Devil and the Almighty Blues - Distance 181 Manowar - Thor (The Powerhead) 182 Djevel - Det Svartner Paa Likbleik Hud 183 Øresus - Angst 184 Turbonegro - City Of Satan 185 Gåte - Sjå Attende 186 Immortal - Where Mountains Rise 187 Cor Scorpii - Fotefar 188 Cadaver - Hypertrophyan 189 Hugsjá - Ni Døtre av Hav 190 Kalandra - Brave New World 191 Borknagar -  Up North 192 Ved Buens Ende - You That May Wither 193 Alestorm - The Sunkn Norwegian 194 Brød & Sirkus - Frykt 195 Burzum -  Jeg Faller 196 Djevel - Et Menniskes Hele Korpus Og Legeme 197 Helheim - Ymr 198 Leaves' Eyes -  Farewell Proud Men 199 Sylvaine - Mørklagt 200 Enslaved -  Convoys To Nothingness 201 Gaahls Wyrd - Ghosts Invited 202 Hagalaz' Runedance -  When The Trees Were Silenced 203 Dismal Euphony - Et Vintereventyr 204 In Vain -  Image of Time 205 Khonsu - The Malady 206 Arctic Sleep -  Pine Mountain 207 Flametal -  I Am A Viking 208 Dimmu Borgir - The Sacrilegious Scorn 209 Trevor Morris - Vikings Attack 210 Wongraven - Tiden Er En Stenlagt Grav 211 Endstille - World Aflame 212 TYR - Eric the Red 213 Synthetic Gentlemen - Kick 214 OBLITERATION - Detestation Rite 215 Judas Priest - Halls Of Valhalla 216 Urarv - Red Circle 217 Old Man's Child - Doommaker 218 Abbath -  Winter Bane 219 A-ha - The Sun Always Shines On TV 220 Eldrim - Attergangar 221 Nan Madol - Tidal Waves 222 Vreid - Lifehunger 223 Acârash - Cadaver Dei 224 Triosphere -  The Sentinel 225 Vargvrede - Song of Betrayal 226 Vemod - Å Stige Blant Stjerner 227 Emperor - Inno A Satana 228 Eivør - Í Tokuni 229 Arcturus -  For to end yet again 230 Enslaved - The River's Mouth 231 Nidinger - Ash Yggdrasil 232 Covenant - Planetary black elements 233 Khold -  Forrykt 234 The Wretched End - Tyrant Of The Mountain 235 Voluspaa - Av Sin Klokskap 236 Solefald - Jernlov 237 Vredehammer - Viperous 238 Hellish Outcast - Partition of Lust 239 An Danzza - Rnatalins Rune Song 240 Green Carnation - The Quiet Offspring 241 1349 -  Nathicana 242 Sirenia -  Spor 2 243 TAAKE - Nattestid Ser Porten Vid 1 244 Virus - Black Flux 245 Blood Red Throne - Requiem Mass 246 Edvard Grieg - March of the Trolls (Orchestral Version) 247 Tidfall - Prophecy Horizon 248 Limbonic Art - A Void Of Lifeless Dreams 249 Lindy-Fay Hella - Three Standing Stones 250 Borknagar -  Winter Thrice 251 Panopticon - Håkans Song 252 ULVER - Nowhere (Sweet Sixteen) 253 Vondur -  Panzer Legions Of Vondur 254 JORN - Traveller 255 Disiplin - Liberation 256 Beyond Dawn - When Beauty Dies 257 Ruphus - Inner Voice 258 Leaves' Eyes -  Norwegian Lovesong 259  The 3rd  & the Mortal - Death-Hymn 260 STORM - Noregsgard 261 Satyricon - Hvite Krists Død 262 R. Stevie Moore –  Norway 263 Lucifer Was - In Anadi's Bower 264 Susane Sundfor  - White Foxes 265 Kjeld - Betsjoend 266 Kari Rueslåtten - Sørgekåpe 267 Green Carnation - Sentinels 268 Agenda - Suffer 269 Mortiis -  Tribute to Euronymous Unreleased Outro 270 Sirius - Sidereal Mirror 271 Insidious Disease - Betrayer 272 Gehenna - Through The Veils Of Darkness 273 The Deviant - Atomic Revolt 274 Varde - Halvdan Svarte 275 Carpathian Forest - He's Turning Blue 276  Ragnarok TV show - Outro 277 Sâver - How They Envisioned Life 278 Dold Vorde Ens Navn - Drukkenskapens Kirkegard 279 MANES - Young Skeleton 280 Nattefrost - Nekronaut 281 Cadaver Inc. - Primal 282 Ida Maria - I Eat Boys Like You For Breakfast 283 ragnarok - En Verden Av Stein 284 Mari Boine - Chasing Myself Into Reality 285 Death By Unga Bunga - Don't Go Looking For My Heart 286 Hexvessel - The Tunnel At The End Of The Light 287 Urgehal - The Iron Children 288 Darkthrone - Soulside Journey 289 Theatre of Tragedy - Der Tanz der Schatten 290 Wardruna -  Kvitravn 291 Einherjer - Dragons of the North 292 Thale OST - Thale theme 293 Hedvig Mollestad Trio  -Bewitched, Dwarfed and Defeathered 294 Motorpsycho - Spin, Spin, Spin 295 Susperia - Vainglory 296 MYRKUR - Jeg er Guden, I er Tjenerne (Live at the Mausoleum) 297 ICS Vortex  - Odin's Tree 298 1349 - Beyond The Apocalypse 299 PRISTINE - You Are The One 300 Tristania - Beyond the Veil 333 Immortal - Where Dark And Light Don't Differ 444 Folket Bortafor Nordavinden - Odin 666 Satyricon -  Mother North  Songs are right here at this link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1_gH0U66TKasbEjdbkPxeW7 Have I missed a song or band? Let me know. Takk!

[withthingsunreal]

hey guys

did y’all know there’s a limit to how many links you can have in a post

adventure time masterpost part one

♥=my favourites Ω=significant plot (though sometimes this is not immediately obvious) ♪=a song happens ♫=a personal fave song happens ¿=just don’t try to think about it too hard okay

SEASON SIX

Ω 6x01/6x02 - Wake Up/Escape from the Citadel [WATCH] - Finn and Jake need to get to the Citadel, and Prismo agrees to help. But the Lich beats them to it, and it seems he's got some plans of his own.

♥ 6x03- James II [WATCH] - An excess of James.

6x04- The Tower [WATCH] [alt]- Finn's missing his arm, so he decides to build a tower into space so he can punch his dad and steal HIS arm instead. Solid plan, right?

¿ 6x05 - Sad Face [WATCH] - A circus, and a clown.

♪ 6x06 - Breezy [WATCH] - Finn's flower isn't doing so well, and Finn himself isn't feeling anything, but his new bee friend Breezy wants to help. Stay tuned for spook (me, that's me) starting a petition to retitle this show 'what the hell did I just watch.'

¿ 6x07 - Food Chain [WATCH] - Finn and Jake learn about the food chain by, um, living it.

6x08- Furniture & Meat [WATCH] - Mo' treasure, mo' problems.

6x09 - The Prince Who Wanted Everything [WATCH] - LSPrincess has a story to share with the Ice King, and LSPrince has a lesson to learn from Fionna the Human.

6x10 - Something Big [WATCH] - Something something Maja something Ancient Psychic Tandem War Elephant something something feelings?? Listen I don't know what I'm watching anymore ok

♪ 6x11 - Little Brother [WATCH] - Shelby has an accident, ends up with a little brother, and turns to Jake for brotherly advice. Well, giving Finn a sword worked out pretty well...

6x12 - Ocarina [WATCH] - Kim Kil Whan buys the treehouse and tries to teach Jake a lesson about responsibility. It goes suuuper well.

6x13 - Thanks for the Crabapples, Giuseppe [WATCH] - Ice King and his fellow offbeats go on a wizard road trip to form their own secret society.

6x14- Princess Day [WATCH] - Breakfast Princess gets rude with LSP. Mistake! Time for her and Marceline to mess up the Breakfast Kingdom way bad.

6x15 - Nemesis [WATCH] - There's a great evil in the Candy Kingdom which must be stopped.

6x16 - Joshua and Margaret Investigations [WATCH] - Finn and Jake's parents fought monsters, too! Even when their mom was way super about-to-pop pregnant, apparently.

6x17 - Ghost Fly [WATCH] - Jake kills a fly, because flies are disgusting. But ghost flies seem to be worse. Oops?

6x18 - Everything's Jake [WATCH] - Bender searches inside himself and finds that Fry has been with him all along Jake goes on an inner journey, but like, literally. not really spiritually so much.

♥ 6x19 - Is That You? [WATCH] - Jake and Finn mourn Prismo, and then things get super bananas up in their dreamspace.

6x20 - Jake the Brick [WATCH] - Jake observes nature as he spends some time as just another brick in the wall.

6x21 - Dentist [WATCH] - Finn's tooth is in real bad shape, and he has to face facts: it is time for him to Go Dentist.

6x22 - The Cooler [WATCH] - There's a crisis in the Flame Kingdom, and FP makes the (objectively terrible??) decision to turn to PB for help.

6x23 - Pajama Wars [WATCH] - Sleepover in the Candy Kingdom! Nothing terrible is happening.

Ω 6x24 - Evergreen [WATCH] - Master Evergreen and his lizardy minion Gunther attempt to save the world.

¿Ω 6x25 - Astral Plane [WATCH] - Finn goes on an astral adventure, and sees some junk that may be relevant soon.

6x26 - Gold Stars [WATCH] - Sweet P starts school, and makes some new (terrible) friends.

6x27 - The Visitor [WATCH] - Finn follows his dream from Astral Plane and finds his least favourite massive disappointment at the end of the trail.

6x28 - The Mountain [WATCH] - It’s a Lemongrab episode. I don’t know anymore.

6x29 - Dark Purple [WATCH] - Susan Strong and some brave hyoomans on a rescue mission.

6x30 - The Diary [WATCH] - Fandom can be a consuming thing. TV finds an old diary and gets a little too into it.

6x31 - Walnuts & Rain [WATCH] - Finn and Jake get separated and go on different (weird) journeys.

6x32 - Friends Forever [WATCH] - Ice King tries to make himself some new friends. It goes terribly.

6x33 - Jermaine [WATCH] - After Jake has a shared dream with Jermaine, the boys go to visit their brother, who’s still living in their childhood home.

6x34 - Chips and Ice Cream [WATCH] - Chips, chips chips chips. Ice cream ice cream. (A travelling performer passes his curse on to Jake. It doesn’t go well.)

6x35 - Graybles 1000+ [WATCH] - Graybles, again, some more. Apparently the Candy Kingdom is still around however much further in the future, and someone’s still putting up string lights at Marceline’s. So there’s that.

6x36 - Hoots [WATCH] - The Cosmic Owl gets distracted by a mystery lady’s pretty set of tailfeathers.

6x37 - Water Park Prank [WATCH] - Finn and Jake (and the Ice King) spend the day at the water park.

6x38 - You Forgot Your Floaties [WATCH] - Magic Man, up to his usual biz, but this time he’s getting a helping hand from Betty. No way this will go horribly wrong??

6x39 - Be Sweet [WATCH] - For some inexplicable reason, Tree Trunks thinks LSP is a good choice for a babysitter. Yikes.

6x40 - Orgalorg [WATCH] - Gunther and the Gunts throw a houseparty.

6x41 - On the Lam [WATCH] - Martin finds another group of adorable creatures to try to exploit. yay.

6x42/6x43 - Hot Diggity Doom/The Comet [WATCH] - An election in the Candy Kingdom, and an impending catastrophe.

SEASON SEVEN

7x01 - Bonnie & Neddy [WATCH] - The King of Ooo continues his efforts to be the worst. PB has to help someone important to her get back to where he belongs.

7x02 - Varmints [WATCH] - Bubblegum tries to protect her pumpkin patch; Marceline lends a hand.

7x03 - Cherry Cream Soda [WATCH] - A candy citizen comes back from the dead, causing some complications for those he’d left behind.

7x04 - Mama Said [WATCH] - While out on a mission for the King of Ooo, Finn and Jake run into Billy’s ex-gf Canyon and decide to help her out instead.

7x05 - Football [WATCH] - BMO tries to do something nice for a friend. It does not go well.

7x06/7x07 - Stakes: Marceline the Vampire Queen/Everything Stays [WATCH] - Marceline has a favour to ask of PB, which results in her reflecting on the last thousand years of her life.

7x08 - Stakes: Vamps About [WATCH] - Marceline’s old nemeses are back, and she’s absolutely down to take ‘em all on again.

7x09 - Stakes: The Empress Eyes [WATCH] - Targeting the Ice King? Possibly not the greatest plan a vampire could have.

7x10 - Stakes: May I Come In [WATCH] - Jake finds his courage.

7x11 - Stakes: Take Her Back [WATCH] - Marceline’s out of commission, so it’s up to Finn and Jake to take on The Moon.

7x12 - Stakes: Checkmate [WATCH] - Four down, one to go.

♫ 7x13 - Stakes: The Dark Cloud [WATCH] - Marceline has to decide what she’s fighting for.

7x14/7x15 - The More You Moe/The Moe You Know [WATCH (watermarked)] - It's BMO's birthday, and a special guest is coming with a special mission for our lil robot buddy. yay?

7x16 - Summer Showers [WATCH] - Viola helps LSP put on a play, and Jake is super proud.

7x17 - Angel Eyes [WATCH] - BMO bribes Finn and Jake into playing cowboys and bandits.

7x18 - President Porpoise Is Missing! [WATCH] - An undersea authority figure appears to have vanished.

7x19 - Blank-Eyed Girl [WATCH] - Urban legends may or may not be baloney, and may or may not be out to get you.

7x20 - Bad Jubies [WATCH] - One heck of a storm brewing up some real nasty vibes.

7x21 - King's Ransom [WATCH] - Ice King isn't going to let anything stop him from rescuing his best bud, and Finn and Jake have got his back.

7x22 - Scamps [WATCH] - Finn rehabilitates some bad seeds.

7x23 - Crossover [WATCH] - Prismo needs Finn and Jake’s help with a junked-up timeline.

7x24 - The Hall of Egress [WATCH] - A dungeon keeps hitting the reset button every time Finn tries to exit.

7x25 - Flute Spell [WATCH] - Does Finn have a new girl in his life, or is he working on a different sort of magic?

7x26 - The Thin Yellow Line [WATCH] - It Is Okay To Be You, ft. The Banana Guards

7x27 - Broke His Crown [WATCH] - Bonnie and Marcie try to have a dinner date with the IK, but his crown is up to some weird biz.

7x28 - Don’t Look [WATCH] - Finn fails to follow the literal only instruction given.

7x29 - Beyond the Grotto [WATCH] - Sea lard rescue 911

7x30 - Lady Rainicorn of the Crystal Dimension [WATCH] - TV finds a weird box.

7x31 - I Am A Sword [WATCH] - FinnSword gets straight up hijacked.

7x32 - Bun Bun [WATCH] - Remember how Cinnamon Bun used to be... just, like, generally bad? at doing things? okay that but smaller.

7x33 - Normal Man [WATCH] - Normal Man needs some hero help to return Glob to Mars.

7x34 - Elemental [WATCH] - An... ice... princess? kinda??

7x35 - Five Short Tables [WATCH] - Fionna and Cake try to make some artsy-ass flapjacks.

7x36 - The Music Hole [WATCH] - Music happens, some of it on a stage.

7x37 - Daddy-Daughter Card Wars [WATCH] - Charlie helps her Papa work through some card-related stuff.

Ω 7x38/7x39 - Preboot/Reboot [WATCH] - Finn, Jake, and Susan visit a very scientific establishment.

SEASON EIGHT

8x01 - Two Swords [WATCH] - So when a FinnSword and a Grass Sword meet... sometimes some stuff can go the hell down.

8x02 - Do No Harm [WATCH] - Finn and Grass Finn try stuff out.

8x03 - Wheels [WATCH] - Jake tries to connect with his granddaughter by proving he’s cool.

8x04 - High Strangeness [WATCH] - Tree Trunks loves... revolution (｡•`_´•｡)

8x05 - Horse and Ball [WATCH] - James Baxter rides again.

8x06 - Jelly Beans Have Power [WATCH] - PB tries to get a handle on the elemental powers thing.

Ω 8x07 - Islands: The Invitation [WATCH] - Susan sent out a distress signal, and a response has arrived.

8x08 - Islands: Whipple the Happy Dragon [WATCH] - Hazardous seas, or Here There Be Dragons.

Ω 8x09 - Islands: Mysterious Island [WATCH] - Finn gets separated from his friends, but makes a new one.

Ω 8x10 - Islands: Imaginary Resources [WATCH] - BMO helps Finn and Jake get acquainted with the triumphs and defeats, the epic highs and lows of virtual reality gaming.

Ω♪ 8x11 - Islands: Hide and Seek [WATCH] - Memories of island life.

Ω 8x12 - Islands: Min & Marty [WATCH] - Minerva Campbell and Martin Mertens get to know each other.

Ω 8x13 - Islands: Helpers [WATCH] - Finn meets his mom.

Ω 8x14 - Islands: The Light Cloud [WATCH] - The conflicting desires to protect your child while also allowing them to grow and thrive.

SEASON NINE

9x01 - Orb [WATCH] - Some very normal dreamscapes on the return journey to Ooo.

9x02 - Elements: Skyhooks [WATCH] - The boys make it home but things are looking... different.

9x03 - Elements: Bespoken For [WATCH] - The Ice King has a story to tell about a hot date he had, and also tangentially the current state of things.

9x04 - Elements: Winter Light [WATCH] - A visit to the Ice Kingdom.

9x05 - Elements: Cloudy [WATCH] - Finn needs to calm down, and Jake needs to potty.

9x06 - Elements: Slime Central [WATCH] - It's Slime Time baybee

9x07 - Elements: Happy Warrior [WATCH] - A normal one in the Flame Kingdom.

9x08 - Elements: Hero Heart [WATCH] - LSP tries to help Finn listen to his hero heart, while PB just wants everyone to be a little bit sweeter.

9x09 - Elements: Skyhooks II [WATCH] - Let's Get Lumpy.

9x10 - Abstract [WATCH] - Jake is wary of some changes in Jermaine.

9x11 - Ketchup [WATCH] - Marceline and BMO catch up on recent events.

9x12 - Fionna and Cake and Fionna [WATCH] - Ice King gets to hang with the REAL Fionna.

9x13 - Whispers [WATCH] - Finn and Fern help Sweet Pea with some nightmares.

9x14 - Three Buckets [WATCH] - Finn and Fern spend some uhhh quality time together

SEASON TEN

10x01 - The Wild Hunt [WATCH] - Huntress Wizard needs some assistance, and Finn has some junk to work through.

10x02 - Always BMO Closing [WATCH] - BMO and Ice King team up to become a door-to-door salesman.

10x03 - Son of Rap Bear [WATCH] - FP needs to work on her rap game.

10x04 - Bonnibel Bubblegum [WATCH] - Family junk is complicated.

10x05 - Seventeen [WATCH] - It’s Finn’s birthday! Let’s get Arthurian up in here.

10x06 - Ring of Fire [WATCH] - The marvelous misadventures of Tree Trunks.

10x07 - Marcy + Hunson [WATCH] - Marceline’s dad is in town and totally embarrassing her again.

10x08 - The First Investigation [WATCH] - Finn and Jake look into some haunted happenings at Joshua and Margaret Investigations

10x09 - Blenanas [WATCH] - Finn wants the highest possible authority to weigh in on whether or not he is funny.

10x10 - Jake the Starchild [WATCH] - Jake’s gotta save the world. No, a different one.

10x11 - Temple of Mars [WATCH] - Jermaine and Finn gotta rescue Jake, and in the process maybe help Betty work through some things.

10x12 - Gumbaldia [WATCH] - Peace talks.

♥Ω♫ 10x13 - Come Along With Me [WATCH] - Everything stays, but it still changes.

[katesbookcase]

Books I Purchased in 2020

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi

Red Queen Collector’s Edition by Victoria Aveyard

Blood&Honey by Shelby Mahurin

Master of One by Danielle Bennett and Jaida Jones

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

Dirty by Belle Aurora

I Can be a Better You by Tarryn Fisher

Where The Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens

The Kiss Thief by L.J. Shen

Brightside by Kim Holden

Star Daughter by Shveta Thakrar

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue (x3) by V.E. Schwab

Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

Raybearer by Jordan Ifueko

The Hazel Wood by Melissa Albert

Invisible Girl by Lisa Jewell

Girl, Serpent, Thorn by Melissa Bashardoust

The Wife Upstairs by Rachel Hawkins

This Is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

The Lathe of Heaven by Ursula K. Le Guin

Neverland by Anna Katmore

Caraval Collector’s Edition by Stephanie Garber

Caraval by Stephanie Garber

Birthday Girl by Penelope Douglas

I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sanchez

Archer’s Voice by Mia Sheridan

Skyhunter by Marie Lu

Cinderella is Dead by Kalynn Bayron

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas

A Touch of Darkness by Scarlett St. Clair

The Wrath and the Dawn by Renee Ahdieh

Raw by Belle Aurora

Marrow by Tarryn Fisher

Legend by Marie Lu

mini Legend book by Marie Lu

Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates

Anna and the French Kiss Collector’s Edition by Stephanie Perkins

Night of Cake & Puppets by Laini Taylor

An Ember in the Ashes by Sabaa Tahir

F*ck Love by Tarryn Fisher

F*ck Marriage by Tarryn Fisher

Atheists Who Kneel and Pray by Tarryn Fisher

The Killing Woods by Lucy Christopher

Imaginary Friend by Stephen Chbosky

Lady Smoke by Laura Sebastian

The Kingless Crown by Sarah Cradit

Furyborn by Claire LeGrand

Legendborn (x2) by Tracy Deonn

Mud Vein by Tarryn Fisher

Dear Martin by Nic Stone

Fable by Adrienne Young

Daughter of the Pirate King by Tricia Levenseller

Ash Princess by Laura Sebastian

When it Rains by Lisa DeJong

Renegades by Marissa Meyer

Tristan Strong Punches a Hole in the Sky by Kwame Mbalia

Paola Santiago and the River of Tears by Tehlor Kay Mejia

Layla by Colleen Hoover

Heart Bones by Colleen Hoover

Regretting You by Colleen Hoover

Too Late by Colleen Hoover

It Ends With Us (Mass Market Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Maybe Someday (UK Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Point of Retreat (UK Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Point of Retreat

Maybe Now by Colleen Hoover

Maybe Not by Colleen Hoover

Confess (Movie cover) by Colleen Hoover

Finding Perfect by Colleen Hoover

Finding Cinderella by Colleen Hoover

Never Never (trilogy & individual books) by Colleen Hoover & Tarryn Fisher

Heart Bones (Large Print Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Verity (Large Print Edition) by Colleen Hoover

One More Step Anthology

November 9 (Illustrated Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Losing Hope (Hardcover) by Colleen Hoover

Without Merit (Hardcover) by Colleen Hoover

All Your Perfects (Hardcover) by Colleen Hoover

Too Late (German Edition) by Colleen Hoover

Verity (German Edition) by Colleen Hoover

The Vincent Brothers by Abbi Glines

The Vincent Boys by Abbi Glines

Breathe by Abbi Glines

Because of Low by Abbi Glines

White it Lasts by Abbi Glines

Just for Now by Abbi Glines

Sometime it Lasts by Abbi Glines

Misbehaving by Abbi Glines

Bad for You by Abbi Glines

Hold on Tight by Abbi Glines

Until the End by Abbi Glines

Because of Lila by Abbi Glines

Existence by Abbi Glines

Predestined by Abbi Gline

Ceaseless by Abbi Glines

The Modern Faerie Tales by Holly Black

The Cruel Prince by Holly Black

The Wicked King by Holly Black

The Queen of Nothing by Holly Black

How the King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories (x4) by Holly Black

Stalking Jack the Ripper by Kerri Maniscalco

Captivating the Devil  by Kerri Maniscalco

Escaping from Houdini by Kerri Maniscalco

Hunting Prince Dracula by Kerri Maniscalco

Kingdom of the Wicked by Kerri Maniscalco

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Perdido Street Station by China Mieville

Beautiful Redemption by Jamie McGuire

Beautiful Burn by Jamie McGuire

Beautiful Sacrifice by Jamie McGuire

Beautiful Funeral by Jamie McGuire

Beautiful Wedding by Jamie McGuire

Something Beautiful by Jamie McGuire

Red Hill by Jamie McGuire

From Here to You by Jamie McGuire

The Edge of Us by Jamie McGuire

Shadows by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Onyx by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Opal by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Origin by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Opposition by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Obsession by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Onyx (original cover) by Jennifer l. Armentrout

The Burning Night (x3) by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Rage and Ruin by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Wicked by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Torn by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Brave by Jennifer l. Armentrout

White Hot Kiss by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Stone Cold Touch by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Every Last Breath by Jennifer l. Armentrout

The Return by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Sentinel by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Half-Blood by Jennifer l. Armentrout

A Kingdom of Flesh and Fire by Jennifer l. Armentrout

From Blood and Ash by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Scorched by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Frigid by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Moonlight Scandals by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Till’ Death by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Tempting the Best Man by Jennifer l. Armentrout

The Problem with Forever by Jennifer l. Armentrout

If There’s No Tomorrow by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Unchained by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Cursed by Jennifer l. Armentrout

1001 Dark Nights: The Summer King Bundle by Jennifer l. Armentrout

Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas

The Assassin’s Blade by Sarah J. Maas

Crown of Midnight by Sarah J. Maas

Heir of Fire by Sarah J. Maas

Queen of Shadows by Sarah J. Maas

Empire of Storms by Sarah J. Maas

Tower of Dawn by Sarah J. Maas

Crescent City by Sarah J. Maas

**Not Featured in Video**

Sweet Reckoning by Wendy Higgins

Raybearer (UK Edition) by Jordan Ifueko

These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

A Song Below Water by Bethany C. Morrow

The Midnight Star by Marie Lu

A Curse so Dark and Lonely by Brigid Kemmerer

Wicked Saints by Emily A. Duncan

Legendary by Stephanie Garber

[phantomofthepairofdice]

The Rosscars 2020

Wow. It’s that time of year again, only this time it’s different because it’s on a blog that no one will read! (hold for applause) Welcome to the first annual online publication for the Rosscars (hold for applause while the reader acknowledges how positively droll it is that I combined my name with “Oscars”). Who can forget such indelible Rosscar memories like when Steven Soderbergh surprised us all and won Best Director for Out of Sight or Bill Irwin’s beautiful speech upon winning Best Supporting Actor for Rachel Getting Married?! The Rosscars mean something different to everyone, but we all know that they mean quality choices made by a committee of one schmuck. This year’s Rosscars are bizarre because in an effort to be more like the Academy guidelines, film’s nominated have been released between January 1, 2020 and February 28, 2021. As usual, theatrical windows be damned, streamers are welcome. Of course, I have my gripes. I like categorizing movies by release year – specifically, when they become available to the plain old public like yours truly – not at festivals, limited runs in NYC and LA. Well, the Oscars are still weeks away and I feel like everybody wants to forget about last year and move onto this one that we’re already three months into - So here are my awards for the films, performers, and craftspeople that stood out in a pretty exceptional year for movies even though distribution was stranger than ever. 

**A few caveats and guidelines to Rosscar newcomers (which I imagine is just a formality since we all know the Rosscars so well)**

The rules and categories are a little different around here. First, not every category is honored directly. That’s for a few reasons, chiefly that I don’t feel qualified to reward the technical categories properly – I suppose I should say that I feel less qualified to do so than the “above the line” categories. In keeping with the Academy standard, there are five nominees in each category, except for Best Picture, Best Non-Fiction/Documentary Feature, and Best Ensemble Cast which allow up to ten. Every category, save those three, will have the possibility of honorable mentions, because I want to highlight some things that just barely missed the cut. The narrowing down of a lot of these categories was awfully tough.

Nominees are listed alphabetically, and the winners are in bold and italics.

Also, it’s important to keep in mind that I couldn’t see everything (this isn’t a job and it’s still $20 to rent The Father, y’all) and that these are just the opinions of one (self-described) “bozo on the internet.” If you’re a reader and have different picks, feel free to share!

Special Commendations for some things that I want to recognize: • Ludwig Goransson for his Tenet score which is an absolute banger • The costumes of Emma. (Alexandra Byrne), Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom (Ann Roth), and Small Axe (Jaqueline Durran, Sinéad Kidao, and Lisa Duncan) all struck me as exceptional • Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross with their scores for both Soul and Mank. Crazy that Pixar is working with the guy who made “Closer” • The cinematography of Da 5 Bloods (Newton Thomas Sigel), First Cow (Christopher Blauvelt), Beanpole (Kseniya Sereda), and A White, White Day (Maria von Hausswolff)

The Rosscars red carpet was, as usual, a bizarre affair. People filed into the theater and it seemed like the only encounters were awkward ones. Vin Diesel showed up in character as Bloodshot, Aaron Sorkin started getting really verbose about what a lovely night it was, and it became clear that most of the celebrities in attendance didn’t read their invitations closely enough to realize that this was not, in fact, the Academy Awards.

Everyone’s seated, and the show is under way. After a medley about the nominees this year by Common and Seth McFarlane that was more corny but clever than it was funny, the first official category is here, and the presenter is none other than... Ross!

Best Supporting Actor:

1. Chadwick Boseman for Da 5 Bloods

2. Matthew Macfadyen for The Assistant

3. Jesse Plemmons for Judas and the Black Messiah

4. Paul Raci for Sound of Metal

5. Glynn Turman for Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom

Honorable Mentions:

• Lucas Hedges for Let Them All Talk

• Orion Lee for First Cow

• Bill Murray for On the Rocks

Best Supporting Actress:

1. Vanessa Bayer for Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar

2. Candice Bergen for Let Them All Talk

3. Gina Rodriguez for Kajillionaire

4. Amanda Seyfried for Mank

5. Yuon Yuh-jung for Minari

Honorable Mentions:

• Jane Adams for She Dies Tomorrow

• Charin Alvarez for Saint Frances

• Talia Ryder for Never Rarely Sometimes Always

• Debra Winger for Kajillionaire

Everyone loves a montage. The audience gets comfortable in their seats as the video screens start to show a montage of some of the most famous moments from Hollywood’s most magical movies. Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers waltz, gliding across a dance floor like two hovering angels. There’s a clip of Leo declaring himself king of the world in Titanic, the flying bicycles in ET, Bogart stares longingly into Bacall’s eyes, and then there’s some scene where Tom Cruise rides a motorcycle from 2010′s Knight and Day. The audience all seems confused how that last one got in there. The John Williams music swells as little Kevin McAllister screams when puts on aftershave. We see clips of Robert De Niro in Taxi Driver, Carrie Fisher’s Princess Leia embrace Harrison Ford’s Han Solo, Bruce Lee smoothly declares that boards don’t hit back and... wait... was that a clip from Michel Gondry’s Green Hornet with Seth Rogen? And that’s a clip from What Happens in Vegas... Bad Teacher... Vanilla Sky... Shrek 2... Any Given Sunday... Everyone is flummoxed. The last clip fades out and a sole editing credit appears: Cameron Diaz. The lights come up and there’s some applause, but mostly confused murmurs. 

The ceremony has had a bit of a misstep, but nothing it can’t recover from, especially as the next category is announced over the PA, and it looks like the presenter is... Ross!

Best Ensemble Cast:

1. Bacurau

2. Da 5 Bloods 

3. Kajillionaire

4. Let Them All Talk

5. Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom

6. Minari

7. Nomadland

8. Pieces of a Woman

9. Small Axe

Best Original Screenplay:

1. Danny Bilson and Paul Dameo & Spike Lee and Kevin Wilmott for Da 5 Bloods

2. Lee Isaac Chung for Minari

3. Brandon Cronenberg for Possessor

4. Sean Durkin for The Nest

5. Kleber Mendonça Filho and Juliano Dornelles for Bacurau

Honorable Mentions – a very difficult task to weed this down to five.

• Shaka King and Will Berson for Judas and the Black Messiah, from a story by Kenny and Keith Lucas

• Steve McQueen, Alastair Siddons, and Courttia Newland for Small Axe

• Kelly O'Sullivan for Saint Frances

• Thomas Vinterberg and Tobias Lindholm for Another Round

Best Actor:

1. Ben Affleck for The Way Back

2. Chadwick Boseman for Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom

3. Delroy Lindo for Da 5 Bloods

4. John Magaro for First Cow

5. Mads Mikkelsen for Another Round

Honorable Mentions:

• Riz Ahmed for Sound of Metal

• John Boyega for Small Axe

• Daniel Kaluuya for Judas and the Black Messiah

• Hugh Jackman for Bad Education

• Ingvar Eggert Sigurðsson for A White, White Day

We have a break in the action and it looks like Darius Rucker has showed up to perform what he would have nominated for Best Original Song. The crowd is absolutely furious as he starts playing a song that apparently was in Trial of the Chicago Seven. An ocean of sonorous boos and curses overtakes the the once docile crowd. The Rock just ripped his chair from out of the ground. Jane Lynch somehow smuggled in a civil war era flintlock pistol that she’s now pointing at the stage! Suddenly, the crowd unifies around what started as a confident chant of one lone audience member - John C Reilly. It’s growing... Ja Ja Ding Dong, Ja Ja Ding Dong, Ja Ja Ding Dong - it’s like the macabre circus performers from Tod Browning’s Freaks, but instead of chanting “Gooble Gobble” they’re clearly pining for Darius to change his tune to the silly and delightful jam from Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga. Darius, scared for his life, leaves the stage, but here come Will Ferrell and Rachel McAdams to deliver the goods. Busy Philips and Michelle Williams burst into tears. Tom Hanks nods in approval. A segment saved by brave artists placating a toxic group of fans... we’ve just witnessed a live version of the Snyder Cut, folks.

Jack Nicholson seems completely unfazed, giving a thumbs up to the camera and blowing a kiss to the next presenter. Coming to the stage is... Ross... again...

Best Actress:

1. Jessie Buckley for i’m thinking of ending things

2. Carrie Coon for The Nest

3. Han Ye-ri for Minari

4. Sidney Flanagan for Never Rarely Sometimes Always

5. Vasilisa Perelygina for Beanpole

Honorable Mentions – these cuts were especially painful

• Haley Bennet for Swallow

• Morfydd Clark for Saint Maud

• Frances McDormand for Nomadland

• Christin Milioti for Palm Springs

• Geraldine Viswanathan for Bad Education

Best Adapted Screenplay:

1. Charlie Kaufman for i'm thinking of ending things from Iain Reed's novel

2. Sarah Gubbins for Shirley from Susan Scarf Merrell's novel

3. Kelly Reichardt and John Raymond for First Cow

4. Simon Rich for American Pickle from his short story "Sell Out"

5. Mike Makowsky for Bad Education from Robert Kolker's "The Bad Superintendent"

Best Non-Fiction/Documentary Feature:

1. Boys State

2. Collective

3. David Byrne’s American Utopia

4. Dick Johnson is Dead

5. Feels Good Man

6. In & Of Itself

7. The Painter and the Thief

8. Time

Jimmy Fallon has come out on stage to do a bit about the pandemic and watching movies at home. People are just absolutely not having it. He tries not to laugh at his own jokes while doing what I guess is technically a pretty good impression of Dr. Fauci interviewing James Corden as Martin Scorsese (the less said of this impression, the better) on what is or isn’t cinema. The bit doesn’t track and Fallon is absolutely tanking. The producers cut away from the stage to spare the viewers at home from this monstrosity. We see crowd shots of Millie Bobby Brown shaking her head in dismay, Colin Firth is simultaneously grimacing and trying to stave off laughter, Cynthia Erivo is texting, and director Tom Hooper is taking notes for his next film. Corden yells, “Carpool Karaoke! Remember?!” Ron Howard has fainted. This thing is almost completely off the rails.

Coming back to the stage is the next presenter, a clearly embarrassed... Ross! He’s in a total flop sweat, but stumbles his way through a joke about how Fallon should try co-hosting the Oscars with James Franco sometime. There are scant chuckles throughout a crowd that mostly just wants to see who won and go home.

Best Director:

1. Christopher Nolan for Tenet

2. Spike Lee for Da 5 Bloods

3. Steve McQueen for Small Axe

4. Kelly Reichardt for First Cow

5. Chloé Zhao for Nomadland

Honorable Mentions:

• Kitty Green for The Assistant

• Eliza Hittman for Never Rarely Sometimes Always

• Charlie Kaufman for i'm thinking of ending things

• Thomas Vinterberg for Another Round

Best Picture

1. Bacurau

2. Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar

3. Da 5 Bloods

4. First Cow

5. i'm thinking of ending things

6. Judas and the Black Messiah

7. Never Rarely Sometimes Always

8. Nomadland

9. Small Axe

10. Tenet

Accepting the award for best picture is none other than Eve, the cow actor who played the titular First Cow! The audience is enamored with how graceful she looks in her cow gown, and her speech, though indecipherable, is likely simple, observational, and deeply profound for those who speak cow.

Wow, what a ceremony! Hearts were broken, property was damaged, dreams were fulfilled... blood was shed? Damn it, Meryl Streep came in and mugged Charlie Kaufman before absconding with the trophy. Oddly, she’s a previous winner, so the attack isn’t out of need for hardware. People are reading through articles about production on Adaptation for potential motives. Streep made time for a photo opportunity, but remains at large.

I could go on ad infinitum about all of these nominees and winners themselves and why they did or didn’t make the cut, but that’d be better served in a different piece. For now, my thoughts on most of these can be found on the Best of 2020 write-up and over on my Letterboxd. And, as always, these awards can be revoked and redistributed at will, so don’t get too cozy with that statue, Danny Bilson!

On behalf of the RAOGL (Rosscars Association of One Guy at a Laptop), thanks for reading, and stay tuned as we’re establishing a tip line for anyone has seen Ms. Streep or her stolen valor Rosscar. We’ll see you next year. Keep watching movies, and keep arbitrarily quantifying them in terms of subjective quality!

[tacitwhisky]

Jon / Sansa Reread - Bran I, AGOT

In which Bran sees an execution, talks to Jon, talks to Ned, and then finds some direwolves.

I always love when other people do rereads, so I’m trying my hand at it, with a focus on Jon and Sansa and how Martin writes them. This is essentially fanfic research, and for that it’s always best to go back to the original source.

So if this is a Jon and Sansa reread why am I starting with a Bran chapter? Because while on the surface Bran I is about Bran, it’s also equally about introducing the male side of the Starks and so has a lot of valuable insight into Jon’s character. It’s also one of my favorite chapters in the series for just how sparse and laconic Martin’s style is throughout.

The morning had dawned clear and cold, with a crispness that hinted at the end of summer. They set forth at daybreak to see a man beheaded, twenty in all, and Bran rode among them, nervous with excitement. This was the first time he had been deemed old enough to go with his lord father and his brothers to see the king’s justice done. It was the ninth year of summer, and the seventh of Bran’s life.

This is such a great hook to open a chapter and the book as a whole with and ticks a lot of important boxes in just a paragraph: the setting, Bran’s age and state of mind, and a good hook. Who is being beheaded? Why is he being beheaded? Why is a child going to go see it? As a writer you almost always want to have an underlying tension or question that the reader wants answered to drive them forwards.

Bran’s bastard brother Jon Snow moved closer. “Keep the pony well in hand,” he whispered. “And don’t look away. Father will know if you do.”

It’s interesting Martin has Jon play the role of older brother here rather than Robb. Despite his half-brother bastard status Jon is clearly close with Bran, as we’ll see later when he visits Bran’s bedside after he falls. He doesn’t coddle Bran though; partly this is to emphasize the Stark coldness, but also I think it’s an insight into Jon’s character.

There’s a recurring thread through these early chapters that Jon doesn’t have quite the same leeway as the true born Starks in Winterfell. He’s probably especially sensitive to disappointing Ned. After all, his existence at all is already an embarrassment and spot on Ned’s honor.

Bran’s father sat solemnly on his horse, long brown hair stirring in the wind. His closely trimmed beard was shot with white, making him look older than his thirty-five years. He had a grim cast to his grey eyes this day, and he seemed not at all the man who would sit before the fire in the evening and talk softly of the age of heroes and the children of the forest. He had taken off Father’s face, Bran thought, and donned the face of Lord Stark of Winterfell.

As Ned’s son Jon does exactly this in ADWD when he has to don his own Lord Commander face. While in this chapter we don’t get to see into Ned’s head, in ASOS and ADWD we’ll see just how much it costs Jon to maintain the cold Lord Stark persona both personally and politically when he makes Gilly touch the fire and give up her child, or forces Sam to travel south, or demands child hostages from the Wildlings to cross the Wall.

Jon’s cold practically is an aspect of his character that doesn’t really get explored much in fanfic, or even really included at all. There’s a couple reasons for it, I think. First, even if they have read the books, the show’s presentation of Jon tends to be what sticks in most people’s heads, and the show has definite habit of softening and whitewashing Jon’s character so he can be the Hero, not to mention Kit Harington’s constantly plaintive look.

Second, I think a lot of fic writers prefer to have Sansa be the cold hard one (which is also a show invention, but we’ll get into that later) paired with Jon as the emotionally softer one. Which is fair. I love that contrast and dynamic. But I do wish we got a little more examination and exploration of the parallels between how they both got to their Stark face and how they interact now.

The head bounced off a thick root and rolled. It came up near Greyjoy’s feet. Theon was a lean, dark youth of nineteen who found everything amusing. He laughed, put his boot on the head, and kicked it away. “Ass,” Jon muttered, low enough so Greyjoy did not hear. He put a hand on Bran’s shoulder, and Bran looked over at his bastard brother. “You did well,” Jon told him solemnly. Jon was fourteen, an old hand at justice.

Just in case you were wondering if Theon was a terrible person or not.

“The deserter died bravely,” Robb said. He was big and broad and growing every day, with his mother’s coloring, the fair skin, red-brown hair, and blue eyes of the Tullys of Riverrun. “He had courage, at the least.”

“No,” Jon Snow said quietly. “It was not courage. This one was dead of fear. You could see it in his eyes, Stark.” Jon’s eyes were a grey so dark they seemed almost black, but there was little they did not see. He was of an age with Robb, but they did not look alike. Jon was slender where Robb was muscular, dark where Robb was fair, graceful and quick where his half brother was strong and fast.

Jon calling Robb “Stark” here is interesting for a couple reasons. Partly this is just Martin trying to set up really quickly for the reader Jon’s bastard status; even Arya, who Jon is closest to, will in her inner narration call him her half-brother quite a bit. But it also signals a kind of a acknowledged formal space between Jon and the other Starklings, even if it’s one they’re used to.

Robb was not impressed. “The Others take his eyes,” he swore. “He died well. Race you to the bridge?”

“Done,” Jon said, kicking his horse forward. Robb cursed and followed, and they galloped off down the trail, Robb laughing and hooting, Jon silent and intent. The hooves of their horses kicked up showers of snow as they went.

There’s a really chilling kind of casualness to the older boys’ reaction to the execution. Even Jon who treats it more seriously than Theon is still able to shift modes easily. Part of this I think is just early installment weirdness, but it also nicely shoves the reader into the medieval mindset of westeros in a way that the show never quite achieves. Though it’s underrated, the underlying medieval mindset is one of the key differences between books and show and causes havoc in later seasons as the showrunners have to adjust and soften character to make them more palatable to a modern audience while not changing the underlying actions themselves. It creates a sort of cognitive dissonance and some of the themes logical coherence slip through the crack.

The contrast between Robb laughing and Jon silent and intent is a great character detail. Robb isn’t taking this as seriously as Jon, because Jon takes everything seriously. He has to. It’s another way his bastard status influences his personality. Robb can lose and he’ll still be lord of Winterfell one day. Jon? Not so much. So this is how Jon treats everything in his life: seriously. It’s a also a bit of a childhood and teenager thing.

Bran thought about it. “Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?”

“That is the only time a man can be brave,” his father told him.

This is one of the clearest articulations of Martin’s ethos and the theme in all of his work, but especially ASOIAF, of existential heroism. When we talk about Jon as a hero, it’s that which makes him one in the end, not the magical sword or rags to riches; when it comes down to it he does the right thing no matter how much it costs him personally (ASOS) or materially (ADWD). It’s also one of the themes the show completely misses, instead espousing that being honorable makes you stupid.

His lord father smiled. “Old Nan has been telling you stories again. In truth, the man was an oathbreaker, a deserter from the Night’s Watch. No man is more dangerous. The deserter knows his life is forfeit if he is taken, so he will not flinch from any crime, no matter how vile. But you mistake me. The question was not why the man had to die, but why I must do it.”

Bran had no answer for that. “King Robert has a headsman,” he said, uncertainly.

“He does,” his father admitted. “As did the Targaryen kings before him. Yet our way is the older way. The blood of the First Men still flows in the veins of the Starks, and we hold to the belief that the man who passes the sentence should swing the sword. If you would take a man’s life, you owe it to him to look into his eyes and hear his final words. And if you cannot bear to do that, then perhaps the man does not deserve to die.”

“One day, Bran, you will be Robb’s bannerman, holding a keep of your own for your brother and your king, and justice will fall to you. When that day comes, you must take no pleasure in the task, but neither must you look away. A ruler who hides behind paid executioners soon forgets what death is.”

This has been explored more and better in other meta, but the Starks and the north in general has a far more personal view of justice and governing than the south. This isn’t to say it’s better, but it is different. Later as Lord Commander we’ll see just how much of that ethos Jon picked up from Ned: in beheading Janos Slynt, in the mission creep at Hardhome, and in his failure to really use his institutional power to make changes to the Night’s Watch. There’s a strong sense of personal responsibility and connections in northern governance.

Half-buried in bloodstained snow, a huge dark shape slumped in death. Ice had formed in its shaggy grey fur, and the faint smell of corruption clung to it like a woman’s perfume. Bran glimpsed blind eyes crawling with maggots, a wide mouth full of yellowed teeth. But it was the size of it that made him gasp. It was bigger than his pony, twice the size of the largest hound in his father’s kennel.

“It’s no freak,” Jon said calmly. “That’s a direwolf. They grow larger than the other kind.”

Theon Greyjoy said, “There’s not been a direwolf sighted south of the Wall in two hundred years.”

“I see one now,” Jon replied.

Notice how calm is Jon with Theon here. It’s a bit of a cheap shot at Theon to make us like Jon more as a character, but is also very in line with his character. Very rarely even in later books does Jon react emotionally to things (with a few exceptions like when he tries to murder Alliser Thorne); he tends not to from a place of emotion and almost always takes time to think things through. The reason for this is Jon is calm because he has to be. It’s a result of his marginalized status in the Stark household. There’s no leeway in his bastard position for emotional outbursts: Catelyn isn’t going to put up with that shit, and he’s already enough of an embarrassment to Ned just by existing.

While we don’t ever really get much thought from either Jon or Theon about their relationship with each other, their interaction in this chapter is I think indicative of it as a whole; slightly adversarial and only cordial because of their mutual friendship with Robb. Theon as a whole is a really interesting foil to Jon; irreverent where Jon is serious, emotional where Jon is calm, dismissive where Jon is willing to learn about others.

They both have outsider status in the Stark household, but instead of bonding, Theon is significantly closer to Robb. While Jon does have privilege, Theon has more (he is the Greyjoy heir after all) and more importantly, has internalized it far more. It makes sense that aside from just personality differences Theon would think himself above Jon and be drawn to Robb as a source of privilege.

“Born with the dead,” another man put in. “Worse luck.”

“No matter,” said Hullen. “They be dead soon enough too.”

Bran gave a wordless cry of dismay.

“The sooner the better,” Theon Greyjoy agreed. He drew his sword. “Give the beast here, Bran.”

In case you had any doubt Theon is in fact the worst, here we have him enthusiastically ready to commit puppy murder.

“Lord Stark,” Jon said. It was strange to hear him call Father that, so formal. Bran looked at him with desperate hope. “There are five pups,” he told Father. “Three male, two female.”

“What of it, Jon?”

“You have five trueborn children,” Jon said. “Three sons, two daughters. The direwolf is the sigil of your House. Your children were meant to have these pups, my lord.”

Bran saw his father’s face change, saw the other men exchange glances. He loved Jon with all his heart at that moment. Even at seven, Bran understood what his brother had done. The count had come right only because Jon had omitted himself. He had included the girls, included even Rickon, the baby, but not the bastard who bore the surname Snow, the name that custom decreed be given to all those in the north unlucky enough to be born with no name of their own.

Their father understood as well. “You want no pup for yourself, Jon?” he asked softly.

“The direwolf graces the banners of House Stark,” Jon pointed out. “I am no Stark, Father.”

I don’t have a lot to say about this passage, but it’s a good example of Jon choosing to do the right thing despite how it won’t benefit him and also show just how much he loves his siblings that he’s willing to do this for them.

Halfway across the bridge, Jon pulled up suddenly.

“What is it, Jon?” their lord father asked.

“Can’t you hear it?”

Bran could hear the wind in the trees, the clatter of their hooves on the ironwood planks, the whimpering of his hungry pup, but Jon was listening to something else.

“There,” Jon said. He swung his horse around and galloped back across the bridge. They watched him dismount where the direwolf lay dead in the snow, watched him kneel. A moment later he was riding back to them, smiling.

“He must have crawled away from the others,” Jon said.

“Or been driven away,” their father said, looking at the sixth pup. His fur was white, where the rest of the litter was grey. His eyes were as red as the blood of the ragged man who had died that morning. Bran thought it curious that this pup alone would have opened his eyes while the others were still blind.

This is such a powerful moment to me. Remember that of all the direwolves Ghost never growls or howls or makes any sound at all. And yet Jon hears him somehow. Even though we just met Jon we understand by this point just how left out Jon feels, and here he has a creature that wants him, needs him, loves him. Later when Jon makes the decision to refuse Stannis’ offer of legitimization we’ll see just how much Ghost means to him.

(I’m not bitter about how the show forgets about Ghost and all the direwolves for long periods. Really. It’s fine. I’m fine. It’s fine. It’s fine. It’s fine. I’m fine. It’s fine.)

“An albino,” Theon Greyjoy said with wry amusement. “This one will die even faster than the others.”

Jon Snow gave his father’s ward a long, chilling look. “I think not, Greyjoy,” he said. “This one belongs to me.”

“I think not, Greyjoy” is low-key my favorite line of the series as a whole, and I hate that they cut it from the show. Instead Theon says Ghost is the run of the litter and Jon gives Theon a look that’s neither long nor chilling and actually feels more like he’s slightly annoyed that Theon is right. It goes back to the difference of how the show softens Jon and casts him more as the reluctant and slightly dense Hero instead of sharp and smart and slightly vicious at times.

That’s largely it for Bran I. Overall it’s a really great insight into Jon’s character and his place in the Stark household while also setting up character threads later chapters will pick up. Speaking of, next up will be Jon I, in which Jon gets drunk and talks with Tyrion. I’m aiming to try and get one of these rereads out a week, so subscribe @tacitwhisky if you’re interested.

Next Chapter (Jon I)

[evielynsmonstereverafterblog]

Monster High Character Theme Songs;

1. Frankie Stein - Electricity by Ashley Jana

2. Draculaura - Best Friend's Brother by Victoria Justice

3. Clawdeen Wolf - She-Wolf by Shakira

4. Cleo de Nile - Stranger by Hilary Duff

5. Nefera de Nile - Sexy Naughty Bitchy Me by Tata Young

6. Spectra Vondergeist - Tell Me Something I Don't Know by Selena Gomez & The Scene

7. Howleen Wolf - Popular (from Wicked) by Kristen Chenoweth

8. Clawd Wolf - Dynamite by Taio Cruz

9. Deuce Gorgon - All-Star by Smash Mouth

10. Scarah Screams - Wide Awake by Katy Perry

11. Jackson Jekyll - Problem by Becky G

12. Holt Hyde - Fire Burning by Sean Kingston

13. Gillington "Gil" Webber - Drowning by the Backstreet Boys

14. Lagoona Blue - Queen Of The Waves by Barbie

15. Lorna McNessie - Brave by Sara Bareilles

16. Kiyomi Haunterly - Clarity by Zedd

17. Porter Geiss - Turn Down For What by DJ Snake feat; Lil Jon

18. River Styxx - Party Poison by My Chemical Romance

19. Sirena Von Boo - Daydreamin' by Ariana Grande

20. Jinafire Long - Gold by Britt Nicole

21. Heath Burns - Burnin' Up by the Jonas Brothers

22. C.A. Cupid - Love You Like A Love Song by Selena Gomez & The Scene

23. Operetta Phantom - Bad Reputation by Joan Jett & the Blackhearts

24. Twyla Boogie - Heart Attack by Demi Lovato

25. Skelita Calaveras - Hips Don't Lie by Shakira feat; Wyclef Jean

26. Rochelle Goyle - Love Me Like You Do by Ellie Goulding

27. Abby Bominable - Hot n Cold by Katy Perry

28. Toralei Stripe - Va Va Voom by Nicki Minaj

29. Vandala Doubloons - Hurricane by Bridgit Mendler

30. Robecca Steam - Titanium by Sia

31. Ivana Sukurblud (OC) - Zombie by The Cranberries

32. Gigi Grant - Genie In A Bottle by Christina Aguilera

33. Whisp Grant - Dark Side by Kelly Clarkson

34. Catty Noir - Ordinary Girl by Clique Girlz

35. Ghoulia Yelps - Game Over by Alexa Vega

36. Meowlody and Purrsephone - Cheetah Sisters by the The Cheetah Girls

37. Gooliope Jellington - All About That Bass by Meghan Trainor

38. Amanita Nightshade - #Selfie by The Chain Smokers

309. Astranova - E.T. (Kanye West; Unedited Version) by Katy Perry feat; Kanye West

40. Elle Eedee - Lights (Dubstep remix) by Ellie Goulding

41. Catrine Demew - Worth It by Fifth Harmony feat; Kid Ink

42. Bonita Femur - Wings by Little Mix

43. Clawdia Wolf - Dear Future Husband by Meghan Trainor

44. Elissabat - Fancy by Iggy Azalea

45. Honey Swamp - Almost There by Anika Noni Rose

46. Jane Boolittle - Roar by Katy Perry

47. Desiryee Grimm (OC) - Find Yourself In You by Everlife

48. Marisol Coxi - Shoot The Moon by Clique Girlz

49. Slow Moe - Slow Down (Chew Fu remix) by Selena Gomez

50. Viperine - Shake It Off by Taylor Swift

51. Venus McFlytrap - Part Of Me by Katy Perry

52. Wydowna Spider - Black Widow by Rita Ora feat; Iggy Azalea

53. Mousecedes King - Turn Me On by Nicki Minaj

54. Madison Fear - Afraid by Vanessa Hudgens

55. Luna Mothews - Butterfly Kisses by Westlife

56. Iris Clops - One Last Time (Piano Version) by Ariana Grande

57. Invisi Billy - Ghost by Mystery Skulls

58. Gilda Goldstag - What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction

59. Casta Fierce - Trap of Love by the New Hex Girls

60. Avea Trotter - Falling Over Me by Demi Lovato

61. Garrott DuRoque - Happy by Pharrell Williams

62. Neighthan Rot - It Will Rain by Bruno Mars

63. Stefani Clawston (OC) - Monster by Lady Gaga

64. Ariana Screech (OC) - Love Me Harder by Ariana Grande feat; The Weeknd

65. Liliana Screams (OC) - Freak The Freak Out by Victoria Justice

66. Cana Bullah (OC) - Cannibal by Ke$ha

67. Harry Bile (OC) - Save You Tonight by One Direction

68. Teila Stiff (OC) - Style by Taylor Swift

69. Icktoria Muskice (OC) - Beggin' On Your Knees by Victoria Justice

70. Cringett Deadler (OC) - Forgot To Laugh by Bridgit Mendler

71. Deadgan Fainter (OC) - Lips Are Movin' by Meghan Trainor

72. Dewley Bondkinston (OC) - Illusion by One Direction

73. Pain Pailstick (OC) - Where Do Broken Hearts Go by One Direction

74. Vile Bo Ren (OC) - Steal My Girl by One Direction

75. Beim Pang (OC) - Half A Heart by One Direction

76. Deadman Bofine (OC) - Animals by Maroon 5

77. Scatty Ferry (OC) - Firework by Katy Perry

78. Stealthy Faust (OC) - Back In Black by AC/DC

79. K.C. Hunt (OC) - Teenagers by My Chemical Romance

80. Lucy Superstitious (OC) - Livin' La Vida Loca by Ricky Martin

81. Serena Rottenberg (OC) - Can't Blame A Girl For Trying by Sabrina Carpenter

82. Kieran Valentine - Break Your Heart by Taio Cruz

83. Johnny Spirit - Devil Went Down To Georgia by The Charlie Daniels Band

84. Victor "Sparky" Frankenstein - This Song Is A Curse by Frank Iero

85. Gory Fangtell - The Middle Of Starting Over by Sabrina Carpenter

86. Manny Taur - Can't Hold Us by Macklemore & Ryan Lewis

87. HooDude Voodoo - Voodoo by Godsmack

88. Destiny Spook (O.C.) - That's What You Get by Paramore

89. Desiree Grimm (O.C.) - Let The Flames Begin by Paramore

90. Dallas Evil (O.C.) - Immortals by Fall Out Boy

91. Ishtar de Nile (O.C.) - Dark Horse by Katy Perry feat; Juicy J

92. Diana Catastrophe (O.C.) - Something's Gotta Give by All Time Low

93. Seth "Pharaoh" Ptolemy - Not Afraid by Eminem

94. Kjertsi Trollson - The Game is Over by *Nsync

95. Frets Quartzmane - Nightmare by Miley Cyrus

96. Finnegan Wake - Surfin' USA by the Beach Boys

97. Alana Bloodfierce (O.C.) - Perfect by Simple Plan

98. Adella Bloodrage (O.C.) - Nobody's Home by Avril Lavigne

99. Sofia Sharpeye (O.C.) - Damaged by Danity Kane

100. Aery Evenfall - Skyfall by Adele

101. Fawntine Fallowheart - A Forest by The Cure

102. Penepole Steamtail - Steam Machine by Daft Punk

103. Pyxis Prepstockings - Claire De Lune by Claude Debussy

104. Skyra Bouncegait - Fight Song by Rachel Platten

105. Bay Tidechaser - Kokomo by The Beach Boys

106. Isi Dawndancer - Only You by Yazoo

107. Batsy Claro - Supersonic by Oasis

108. Ari Hauntington - Ghost by Ella Henderson

109. Moanica D'Kay - Zombie by Bad Wolves

**The ones that say "(O.C.)" in both my Ever After High character theme song list as well as on the Monster High Character Theme song list are characters made by me or someone that I know and those songs were specifically picked for them. So please don't change the songs of any of the O.C.s

Thank You

[jonniquidd]

There is so much value in being able to speak to someone with respect when you’re upset.

Did you have a mean grandmother? I did. She would make me so mad, on purpose, and I would have to stay respectful and kind. She’d say shit like, “that made you mad, didn’t it?” And I’d just smile and say, “no ma’am.” My family is fucked up. Everyone has something, my family likes to “build” people. My grandmother treated me like that until I was 10. Then she called me (something she never did, cause she hates the government and they’re always “listening”) When I got on the phone, she told me about her life; another thing she never did. She told me about our family from her perspective. She talked about god and Jesus, and finally ended it with this lil nugget:

“I treated you mean didn’t I, baby?”

“No ma’am, you love me.”

“Yes, I love you, but I loved you mean, and you ain’t never said nothing to me. But you told your mama. You told your cousins. You told your aunties...”

“Uh-... yes ma’am.”

“That’s what you’re supposed to do, cause you got family. Don’t be sacred, girl. You’re not in trouble. I need you to know this. You are kind, and you will do anything for the people you love, but you can’t ever let anyone hurt you. Not me, not anyone.”

I was speechless.

“You let me make you mad, cause you love me, but if you really loved me, you’d want me to know when I’m wrong. If you really love someone you have to learn how to tell them no and walk away. Because really loving someone means loving yourself too.”

After that, I learned how to respectfully tell people to fuck off. My family is big on respect. You can say anything but don’t curse, holler, or name call. If you’re so mad you wanna fight, you can go outside, but good luck coming back in if an elder whoops your ass. My grandmother marched with Martin Luther king, and witnessed some of his speeches first hand. She was in Philadelphia during the riots. She saw so much, and lived so bravely. But it was still super fucked up to teach a lesson like that... 😒

[arcvist]

jon sees before he sees,      jon knows before he knows,      eyes merely an extension of the mind merely an extension of the self      —      everything all mixed-up and everywhere in the post-everything of it all.      jon knows before he gets back to london,      speeding in martin’s beat-up car down empty highways because it isn’t as if something as small as traffic laws makes a difference now,      that elias      —      that jonah magnus is still there.      jon knows before he turns down this particular street      (      far emptier than a street in central london should be,      though he supposes the end of the world will do that to a city,      leave it a hollowed out husk like this      )      that elias is here,      in front of the husk of what was the institute.

jon has more than one knife in his bag.      daisy’s safehouse had no shortage of weaponry,      and with shaking hands he and martin had carried everything they could find that could hurt into the car.      everything that could protect them in the days to come.      he thinks about reaching for it now.      the thought echoes.

@watcheir​      :      killing me will not save your world.      *

elias sounds so goddamn smug about it all that jon almost wants to try anyway,      wants to charge forward knife in hand.      wants to be brave,      for once,      like tim or melanie or daisy would.      but tim’s dead.      but melanie’s blind,      probably dead by now,      too.      but daisy’s      . . .      well,      the list of the dead grows by the day and he can’t think about them now,      can’t muse on what they would have done,      because they could not and the world has ended and jon was never that type of brave anyway,      even when things were whole.

the knives stay in his bag,      clutched to his side as tight as he can manage.      jon feels suddenly very small under the watchful gaze of the sky.

he does not step forward,      leaves an emptied-out street’s width of distance between them,      though he can see elias just as well as if they were a meter away from one another and knows that sight is returned,      and can hear him equally clearly.      distance won’t save either of them,      but it’s a comforting placebo.      archivist-turned-apocalypse faces king of a ruined world on a once-familiar roadway.      nothing is as it should be,      and jon knows in an instant that to elias,      everything is as it should be,      wearer of that cursed crown,      delighting in the end of things.

and it’s that knowledge that makes jon speak at last,      pouring every ounce of power he has into it      :      his voice still weak,      has been since that damned monologue forced upon him that had opened such terrible doorways,      but the static in it enough to crackle streetlights      &      swirl out of too many eyes.            ‘      then what will?      ’            something must.      elias must know how to reverse this.      jon recalls words dragged kicking forth from his own lips      :      mouthpiece of destruction,      much as he’d clawed at his own throat trying to make the statement stop.      he wants to do the same.      wants to pull this information from elias,      wants the knowledge of it all.      wants it to hurt.