#That's genuinely fowl lmao

[clockwise-works]

Paramount owes everyone who watched the Knuckles Show retributions for that hot garbage.

[supdudes95]

Hello Sup! Nonny here!

There is a list of extra scenes...? 👀 Hmmm... well...!

I DO have an inquiry then- if an inspiration strikes you of course. I believe I mentioned somewhere in the passing that it would be funny if Vox crashed into the wedding, but since then the idea had GROWN and put down the roots in my brain and refuses to leave lmao

You know hitting all the corresponding clichés but failing at them spectacularly or warping them comically- kinda like 'Shrek' did with fairytales themes

I also have an actual question. Will you attach the Extras List somewhere? I am genuinely curious what's in there haha

...though on the other hand a total surprise would be also fun... tsk

Well, anyway- have a wonderful day, Sup!

Hi, Nonny!

There is, indeed, an extras list of scenes and other little ideas that aren't long enough to be chapters in themselves XD I mean, these things could be anything from 500 words to 8K words, depending on the idea and how into detail I go.

I think I have the Vox idea written down- I did not, but now it's on the list! Anyway, yes, I actually thought about that idea, too, having him escape Limbo earlier, but then I felt it wouldn't work with Fowl Nightmares, so I discarded the idea XD That being said, there's also another wedding alternative scene I have in mind, so I'll see if I go for double-trouble and combine them, or I might write them separately. The chaos would be a lot of fun, though XD

When I say there's a list, it's actually a combination of actual ideas, pure dialogue and just completely random sentences, since if I get an idea, I immediately scribble it down so I remember it. It's a chaotic list, for sure, and literally all the ideas-lists I have are written like that XD So, I probably won't share the actual list, unless I add them at the end if people are curious how the boys end up in the situations they do in this universe, and want to see how I planned this entire series. It's literal scene descriptions, dialogue prompts, things I see on the internet that could potentially be warped into dialogue for them, somehow, you know.. There's a lot XD Like, the idea document for Beneath the Red Moon is 12K words long and written on my phone (keep in mind there're no long descriptions, it's literally just dialogue like; "you can shapeshift." "Oh. Right. Good point"), and it is separate from the actual planning document for that story, which is 105 pages of handwritten notes XD All of the stories are built up like this XD

Sorry for the long answer, but thank you for the questions and the request <3 Hope your day's awesome, too!

[blubushie]

the vegans who becry animal death baffle me because?? they are going to die anyway?? it's just a matter of not being barbarically cruel to the cattle and mistreating them while they are under our care

THAT'S EXACTLY MY POINT WITH LEATHER! THE COW'S ALREADY DEAD! IT'S NOT DYING FOR ITS HIDE LMAO

You know what happens if people DON'T eat those cattle? They STILL die. Difference be they're killed and left to rot because they're no longer valuable.

At least with meat production they're dying for a reason and their bodies are put to use as much as they can be. Even their BONES and BLOOD are used for crop fertiliser (that's right, vegans—your salad is watered in blood) and nothing goes to waste. Hooves and horns? Used for glue, or for dog chews. Bones and blood? Fertiliser. Intestines? Sausage. Organs? Yeah I know white people often turn their noses up at the idea of things like brains or tongue or testicles, but people actually eat those. Those that aren't eaten? That gets turned into dog food. The hide? Leather. EVERYTHING gets used or eaten at the end of the day. It's not cattle carcasses going to landfills, just vegan pleather.

And even then—"barbaric cruelty" isn't a cattle or sheep issue. It's a poultry/fowl/pork issue. I genuinely reckon PETA's done irreparable damage to the general population's idea of agriculture and what it looks like—see the whole "this is the other half of your wool jumper" campaign. You don't kill cows to milk them and you don't kill sheep to shear them, fucken idiots.

[space-blue]

🤍🍭🤲

🤍what's one fic of yours you think people didn't "get"?

I don't have a fic I feel people didn't get. I've had comments that completely missed the mark on what I was doing, the characterisation I was going for, etc. But it's rare. It happens most often on my biggest fic, Fathers and Daughters. I don't think there's an issue with either the fic or the readers. It's simply that when you have a story with 130k hits, you're bound to get a few commenters who either don't gel with your style or truly don't 'get' it.

Interestingly the most blatant case of 'not getting it' always happened with people who were completely new to fandom and didn't understand the concept of AUs. I've had people argue with me with stuff that was so fucking dumb like 'Silco would never swear'.

My friend, they're trying to stick to a rating and they already have a child swearing once. Do you really want to argue with me in my comments about the crimelord from the undercity saying 'fucking' once? (yes, they did)

🍭why did you start writing?

Oh shit, you sure picked a funny one. Buckle up for some TMI.

I was on a working holiday visa to Australia, fairly depressed from having had to leave NZ against my better wishes, and I had to do some 'remote' work in order to earn the right for an extansion to my visa. I picked the wrong person. A batshit crazy lady in Grafton in horse training for races. She basically ran us (she had two people at the same time) like slaves. I was doing WAY more work than I should, entirely unpaid, and getting manipulated and gaslit into doing extra work as a photographer.

It was swelteringly hot. Most days I worked in a bikini and shorts, ankle deep in mud when it was raining, and the rain was basically good enough to be a shower. My own showers were often via garden hose. So many flies. You can see me here in front of the 'feed shed' prepping the wet meal.

As soon as you locked the doors to that container it'd be SWARMING with roaches. I was expected to go in there and spray every night. They'd fly everywhere… I was also supposed to lift the feed bags and sic the dogs on mice nest under them. And carry the 50kg bags on my back from the truck. And much the truck. And go everywhere with her. And babysit the awful kids. And spray for spiders. Killed so many redbacks, not even funny. Their dogs had a litter and we had problems (due to not feeding the bitch enough) that resulted in a ton of bacrking right outside of my flimsy little window. I would do all the physical labour and proceed to be totally unable to sleep.

It drove me to the brink of sanity. Like genuinely losing my shit. I grabbed a series and started reading the Black Dagger Brotherhood series. Highly repetitive Vampire smut. I think I read up to book 6 in a week? I can't express how mentally unwell I was lol

Oh, and I couldn't get away because I had like 50$ in my bank account.

So yeah, I spiralled and started writing, like stuff was swirling in my head and putting it down was a lifeline. I still have it… a 40 pages manuscript on shitty paper written in pencil about immortal being that live off of life-force and struggle to live alongside humans in a post apocalyptic world. It had ghouls and roof gardens. lmao.

Anyway, I eventually left (in crazy circumstances) to another horse trainer in Orange (haha).

There I lived on a mattress on the floor at the end of stables, making food on a camping stove. Ruined my mental health even more by reading The Collector by John Fowles. It was so bad, I tried to read The Exorcist as a Palate Cleanser.

I was mucking stables all day, listening to Benedict Cumberbatch reading Metamorphosis on repeat, buffing my already pretty OP shoulders… Here I am atop an enormous pile of horse shit.

So at that stage writing to myself just wasn't cutting it. Talking to horses wasn't fulfilling my basic human needs for social interactions… So I joined an oline scifi and fantasy forum. Someone suggested I join their monthly writing competition, where you were given a topic and had 1.5k words to write about it. I wrote my first one in a feverish haze that day. Then we voted on the best story, and gave each other concrit.

It was my first sserious Writer Serotonin injection. I've never looked back. I went back to civilisation (Melbourne), got a decent job, a shit room (typical East Coast gig), and I carried on writing monthly for… 7 years! Whenever I was in a bad spot it was a real life saver.

I think it's a lot to do with preventing negative thoughts from spiraling. I'm not looking at how shit MY life is, but instead this little witch is in supernatural beings jail and she has to lick the fucking walls to make a potion in that special hidden organ of her and the last ingredient is the blood of her favourite warden and---

You feel me? It's a great way to help regulate my own moods and feelings and explore ideas. I'll stop before I feel like I' m reinventing the wheel.

TL;DR : I started writing because my sanity was crumbling and my life depended on it.

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

I think I've made my point there. Once I have a good story in mind, it practicaly begs to be written. But sometimes characters, original or not, are some of the best company you have in difficult times. And then people tell you how your story touched them and they're grateful to you, for playing with your little dolls? It's an insane thing. A communion with strangers, over something that comes right from your soggy little frog brain?

Fantastic!

[jocelynships]

🌟 for sly cooper? and the rest of the gang if u feel like it?

Ooo yes!!

So I’m still. Very much developing my S/I, it was a very brief obsession that I haven’t thought much about in a year bc. *gestures to Sonic and TMNT*

So this isn’t very detailed but:

My S/I and Sly have a slight Romeo and Juliet thing going on. Just. No one dies and they’re not kids lmao.

Her father is an evil inventor and she’s supposed to be getting engaged to the guy her father has been working for. The bad guys I’m creating for this story are comparable to FOWL from DuckTales 2017. And Sly, Bentley and Murray are trying to take the evil rich people down.

When they first meet at a stuffy rich person party (which is supposed to be her engagement party but she isn’t aware of that, nor does it happen due to the chaos that’s about to ensue), they hit it off immediately! My S/I finally meets someone she enjoys talking to, and while it isn’t a love at first sight sort of thing, she’s definitely interested in him and wants to see him again.

However, Sly, Bentley and Murray get busted by Carmelita and my S/I is devastated, because she thinks Sly was just using her to get close to her father so he could steal from him.

Later on in the night, after everything calms down, my S/I runs into Sly, Bentley and Murray again, and while she’s still upset about everything, Sly explains the situation to her. She quite frankly doesn’t want to believe her father is working for an evil corporation, but something about Sly just seems genuine. He doesn’t seem like a bad guy, despite being a thief.

And honestly, if any of them were gonna hurt her, they probably would have done it by now.

So she lets them go, allowing them to take the invention because if her father really is going to do anything bad, she rather not have prevented it from happening. And if Sly was lying? Well, her and her father won’t miss out on much since they’re pretty rich. And she doesn’t like the business guy her dad wants her to marry.

Eventually, Sly comes back. And my S/I is skeptical. She thought she’d never see him again, but he came back because he wanted to see her. And in a way, she’s glad he did.

They fall in love eventually after his frequent visits! And yes, she runs off with him after she finds out the truth about her father and his stuck up crew of evil billionaires.

So her and Sly are a power couple who steal from the rich, and she’s really good friends with Bentley and Murray! I need to develop her relationship with both of them more, but she’s very much ride or die for these guys, and the friends they make later on.

Also, even though the way Carmelita is written in the game annoys me (I love the Sly games but. The women need to be written better), I wanna rewrite her character some and have my S/I and Carmelita be really good friends, even if they’re technically on opposite sides.

[aleatoryw]

So fantasy books are there any in particular that made an impact on you as a child?

For me it was Mercedes Lackey's Brightly Burning in highschool

Tamora Pierce Lioness series in Middle School

My first fantasy audiobook was the Magician's nephew by C.S. Lewis. Then I think so you want to be a wizard by Diane Duane

like most kids in the 00s i read and enjoyed the narnia series and harry potter, i also read the artemis fowl books and was pretty into maximum ride as a tween, although that one kinda went off the rails in book 4. devoured anything with a unicorn or magic school as a kid.

but honestly the fantasy books i loved most when i was young were the oz series - which is frankly off the rails from book 2. it's the kind of series where it quite genuinely feels like anything can show up and fit right in with the rest of the weirdos in dorothy's crew - a lot of inanimate objects brought to life, talking animals, or nature spirits. prophecies, royalty, using magic items for trickery - the common perception of "the wizard of oz" most people have is so different from the books!

and then at like 12 i got into warrior cats and frankly it was all downhill from there lmao. thanks for the ask!

[lizzieehearts]

thank u for the tag 🫶

last song: bmf by sza she literally wrote that for me !!

favourite colour: pink or cream or beige or blue i genuinely cant decide

last book: finished one of us is back by karen m mcmanus last night! it was soo good i want to reread the whole series soon

last movie: wallace and gromit: vengeance most fowl! so soo good and so funny

last tv show: currently almost done rewatching parks and rec! might just start it all over again when im finished ngl

sweet/savoury/spicy: sweet!

relationship status: taken by a gorgeous man 🫶

last thing i googled: the hollister website lmao i got a voucher for xmas

current obsession: lowkey my planner on notion 😭😭 its just so pretty i cant help but add more and more to it

looking forward to: reading my bible later 💞

taglist: @momorikoz @liahverse @kae-eee @maybeimamuppet + anyone else who wants to !

“people i’d like to know better” - tag game

aaaaa!!! thank you for the tag🥺 @goyangi

last song: the town by junha park

favorite color: all the colors in nature!! but if i had to give one answer, it’s soft shades of purple these days

last book: i.. am ashamed to say this.. but it’s been a few months since i last read something. kind of in a reading slump that i’m trying to break right now. buut the answer is ‘the star seekers’ if it counts? i dropped but i will restart. before that one it was ‘seven days in june by tia williams’ (note: it wasn’t bad but it wasn’t really for me.. wouldn’t recommend) (note2 to @.goyangi : i read almond too and it's so good🥺)

last movie: kabahat (2022, dir. ümran softer) (it’s a turkish movie, the english name is “guilt” apparently. wasn’t bad but wasn’t too good but i really liked the main girl sooo)

last tv show: mr. plankton (note to you @.goyangi again ㅠ : OMG I’M WATCHING mr. plankton too and i’m on ep 5 right now...,,... why are you scared to watch should i be scared too ㅠ)

sweet/spicy/savory: ALL OF THEM... but i don’t like way too sweet things

relationship status: ...in a parasocial relationship with 5 boys from korea..? lol jkjk. single! but i’m in love with so many things in secret

last thing i googled: i searched for a coffee brand hahshah it’s “addis ababa coffee”

current obsession: ummm tomorrow x together..? it’s not current tho xD... nothing else i think ><

looking forward to: soobin’s returning with a completly rested and healed body and mind and better treatment and support for all of the boys. xD ah, besides from that? i’m waiting for a few things i ordered to arrive. (one of them is coming within this week buuut it’s not certain that if i will receive the other within this week too. i’m praying to get both of them at the same time so i can die in happiness)

no pressure tags if you you’d like to do it!! @squirrel-in-the-woods

[05aaphrodite]

I can't let you escape, not even to your own world

Pairings:Yandere! Venti x reader

Warnings:4th wall breaking,Slight crack fic,Reader death

(Plz don't let my friends see this lmao)

______________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐_______________

I chug all of my soda then slam it on the table "Aight, let's go farm for Venti's talent mats" I grabbed my controller then push the left joystick forward, after all of these grinding... I finally manage to get him on his rerun, I was skeptical that he would come home but surprisingly, I did a single pull then I got him, I'm grateful that I got my dream team, Xiao,Diluc,Venti,Bennett I will be saving for a Klee rerun.

My phone beeped a notification, I peek at it and it's my friend gc, I put down my controller then grab my phone

(A/n: Btw, the gc is based of my friend gc lol)

❀Genshin Gang❀

Diluc's hairtie

Y'ALL GUESS WHAT??

Albedo simp

OMGGGGGG CONGRATS BHIEEE

E_supremacy

CONGRATSSSSS

Xiao come home plz

I TOLD YA, YOU WILL GET HIM

Ventea

Hope all😭😭

VENTI CAME HOME

BROOOO CONGRATS OMG

ZHONGLI COME HOME

JK JK CONGRATS TOO

Diluc's hairtie

I was losing hope until I wished one more time😭

ZHONGLI COME HOME

CONGRATSSSS AGAIN, AND TO Y/N, BOTH OF YOU GOT VENTI

VENTI CAME HOME

THANKS PALL

E_supremacy 

Now my Zhongli is happy :D

Diluc's hairtie

YESSES

A smile plastered on my face, I'm so happy for them! My attention was stolen when Venti decides to say his idle line "Come on Traveler, let's go! The world is full of lost ballads just waiting to be rediscovered." I put my phone down then grab my controller again "Ok ok, I will pay attention to you now" I chuckled humorously "Good! Just don't make me murder your friends."

The moment he said that line, my thumb suddenly stopped pushing the joystick, did he just..... did I just heard that right? Murder... your friends? What does he mean by that? Someone never mentioned this voiceline of his, I should check the character icon. I clicked on the character icon then proceed to his voicelines, I checked every details but I can't seem to find it, maybe it's a bug? The fact that I was talking to my friends.... maybe Mihoyo intended it?

I shrugged my shoulders then continue to the domain to farm for talent materials. After countless of grinding, I started to have fun with his wind current while harassing random hilichurls for fun, I made him sat at the Barbatos statue "You finally came home..." I smiled as I touch the screen, Venti looked at the camera then smiled "That's so cute! He smiles when he looks at at camera!" I awed, I continue to fawn over him.

⌣ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ⌣⌣ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ‿ ⌣

I woke up by the sound of my ps4 opening, the bright light illuminated my body, and to my surprise, my ps4 opened by itself "What the fuck?" I stood up from the bed then went to investigate it. The creepiest thing is that Venti is the only one in my party, and he is sitting at barbatos' hands, and then I remembered the hacked accounts in genshin, this could be a sign..

I hurriedly grab my controller then check my characters, all of them were Venti! I can't find a single character other than him! What's going on!? I check my weapons but they are okay, I checked my profile and nothing changed but my icon was set to Venti, i checked my primogems and fate but nothing changed, in fear of getting hacked, I contacted Mihoyo for customer support, I can't lose Xiao, I whaled for him! I restarted my ps4 then go back to sleep, in hopes that it will be resolved next morning.

I rubbed my eyes then stretch my arms wide, I look at my ps4 then my phone, I grab my phone then text on the gc

❀Genshin Gang❀

VENTI CAME HOME

Guyssss, something weird happened yesterday 

ZHONGLI COME HOME

Why?

VENTI CAME HOME

My ps4 opened by itself and Venti was the only one in my party, I tried to change my party set back to normal but all of them were Venti

Albedo simp

Welp, sounds like a bug

But hey, freemogems :D

VENTI CAME HOME

My weapons and primogems were untouched but the weird thing is that my character icon is set to Venti, but I didn't change it

This is like a Ddlc reference lmaooo

Xiao come home plz

Aight, time to report to Mihoyo for free 600 primogems 

E_supremacy

Be careful, maybe you're getting hacked? You should change your password incase

VENTI CAME HOME

Yep bro, I will change it

I put my phone down then open my ps4, I prayed to myself that everything is back to normal. Happiness washed over me when I saw that my original party is deployed "must've been a crazy bug.." I chuckled, I change my icon back to Xiao then continue with the grinding "Ooohhh timmie's birds" I smirked, I switched to Xiao then climb the nearest cliff, I glide then plunge on the birds "Free fowls!!" I exclaimed then claim the fowls, my character suddenly switched  back to Venti, I didn't even press anything other than claim fowls "You know I'm getting impatient.." Venti said, again this was not even in his voice lines, then I notice that something is odd with my venti, he kept saying weird lines everytime my attention is drifted to somewhere else, could it be Mihoyo's doings? I hope so, I don't want a ddlc fiasco again.

After farming for his ascension materials, I quit genshin then read some fanfictions in Tumblr, I came across a Kaeya fanfic then proceed to read the contents. All of a sudden, my ps4's screen started to distort, my eyes widened at the sight of it, then a bright light surrounded me, making my head dizzy

.

.

.

. 

"Traveler, you're awake" I woke up to a familiar voice reaching my ears, I blinked my eyes slowly to realize that I'm not in my room, where am I? My jaw dropped when the person I saw in my eyes is none other Venti, this is impossible! He's not real! "Venti...?" I tilt my head in confusion, there's no way this is real.... this must be a dream! The bard showed a genuine smile before putting down his lyre "I'm happy that you pulled for me, I will go crazy if you pulled for him instead, hehe." Venti had a patronizing smile after that, my eyes widened as I sat up "Venti? There's no way that you're real!" I said, feeling my empty pockets, Venti sighed as he stood up, he had his lyre in his hand "Come on Traveler, let's go celebrate the windblume festival." the God reached out his hand, I was reluctant to respond to his offer, he seems a bit suspicious to me, considering my ps4 sucked me in Teyvat. Not to mention, he said these weird lines when I was communicating with my friends, and my controller would move on its own when I'm playing another character "What are you waiting for?" A smile was om his lips, I took his hand then stood up "Ok, let's go." Venti giggled as he led me in Mondstadt, I gaze behind to see the Vennessa tree.

No way.... all of this seemed real... the designs.... the npcs.... all of them are accurate! The only difference is that I don't see control menu "Isn't it beautiful? Traveler?" Venti turned to me, I nodded with hesitant. As my eyes scanned the whole city, Fischl and Bennett were talking to each other, Kaeya,Rosaria, and Diluc at the same table, although Diluc seems poker faced, Barbara was performing for the crowd, Jean and Lisa are eating together, Albedo,Sucrose, and Timaeus are experimenting,Amber is seen gliding, everything seemed lively more than the actual game.... "Come on Traveler!" The bard took my hand without giving me time to consent.

The rustling sounds of the leaves snap me back to reality, it still feels like a dream, did Mihoyo said something about this? The atmosphere is so lively and different "Uh oh woahhh!! Watch out!" Amber then crashed into Noelle, I giggled slightly then turn to the bard who was playing the lyre for a small crowd, as the sweet melodious tone halt to stop, the crowd clapped their hands, I smiled a little bit as I made my way towards him "Did you like it?" Venti inquired, I nodded then smiled, the bard chuckled as he took my hand then led me somewhere.

I realized we were getting far away from the festival, perturbation washed over me "Venti.... where are we going?" sweat dropped on my temples, Venti looked at me with a menacing smile "Somewhere..." 

He led me to starsnatch cliff, the breeze of the wind soothes my nostrils, I can't believe all of these are real.... Venti picked a Cecilia flower then hand it to me, I narrowed my eyes "Are you really.... real?" I gaze at his eyes 

"I'm aware that all of us are just video game characters, that's why I'm a God"

My eyes widened as he said that, he tucked the cecilia behind my ear "Y/n, will you stay here forever..?" The bard took both of my hands, his puppy eyes gleaming, I do want to visit Genshin.... but that does not mean I will abandon my world 

"Venti.... I have my friends and family there..." I said, I averted my gaze to the floor, his grip on me got tighter "Y/n, your world does not need you" his tone was a mix of devastate and anger "All you need is me, you belong here" 

My eyebrows furrowed, what does he mean by that!? "No! I can't just leave everyone! My friends care about me!"  I screamed in frustration. He then uses his anemo powers on me that sent me flying through the air "Arghh! Let me go!!" I desperately try to break free

"Don't you see that I love you? I don't like it when you control me everyday" Venti was feigning sadness on his tone 

"Because you're never real!" I retorted back, a grin was marked on his face "I ever regret pulling for you!" I yelled. The bard went closer then cup my cheeks "So? You already got me, you did this to yourself" then his hands swayed, causing me to fall of the cliff, my life flashed before me, this is it....

"May your soul rest in this game"

[min0uet]

for someone who's been hardcore into fenro since who is gizmoduck aired, the fenro shippers on this site are sure getting on my nerves ever since beaks in the shell

1] you knew fenro wasn't going to be canon ever since gandra dee debuted. like i don't know what to say if you were genuinely surprised by fenton and gandra being official, the show made it really clear at the end of dangerous chemistry. i'm pretty sure that even if gandra actually had been on the side of FOWL they'd have a spiderman and black cat kind of thing going on. yeah it's a bit disappointing that we didn't get a canon gay relationship between speaking characters, but that leads us to...

2] i get that some of us prefer gay ships to male/female ships, i really do, but the fact is that a canon, healthy, romance between two characters of color that gets whole episodes dedicated to them is still a big deal. how often do we get that? like, this is still a pretty big step forward.

3] polyamory exists, it's beautiful, and you guys gotta stop acting like gandra is singlehandedly destroying your ship. fenton can love more than one person! not to mention gandra is just as interesting and nuanced of a character as gyro. he's only more popular than her because he's been around for more episodes and is a white twink. i'm saying this as a gyro kinnie lmao. i love him, but we know it's true.

tl:dr; fendra is really good! and you don't have to only choose one ship or the other, it's perfectly possible for them to coexist

[mossbear-minese]

Hi you are delightful!!!

Sherlock is a great time! I recently played the violin for the first time and fell in love with it (which was genuinely surprising, I thought I was a pianist for life, but I'm being tempted away lmao) and I really want to learn that duet in the last episode!!

That locket sounds lovely!! I never really got into Detroit Become Human but what I do see is very entertaining! Have you played it yourself or just watched lets plays?

I really really really want to hear more about the fan animatic please and thank you I have questions Like what program(s) are you using?? "The Demons have decided to Afflict me today (got m period)" is a whole mood phrased Perfectly thank you

Most of my paper mache experiences were making pinatas, hearing about the shark and starly really want me to experiment more

It's been a while since I read the Artemis Fowl series, so I also don't remember much of it, but I remember I really enjoyed it! Fun character dynamics :D

YES I've read Warriors, I don't think I read all of them but I sure did read most of them!!

BITE. HELLO

What kind of things do you like/are you in any fandoms/you seem cool and I want to talk nto you but I don’t know about what!!! Hello!!!!!

BITE YOU BACK

HELLO!!

You also seem cool!! I noticed your banner (I think that's what its called lmao) and I love Falsettos, that seems like a good starting point!!

Peeking at your posts I also notice you have posts about Sherlock, and I'm fascinated by that paper mache shark, and your thoughts about Artemis Fowl?

[cinnabuntastic]

God having actually seen Hadestown live now, with the knowledge that at least one writer went into DT17 intentionally modeling Fenton and Gandra on that version of Orpheus and Eurydice, has absolutely been running rampant in my head since Saturday night.

Lyrics and thoughts below.

Gandra herself gives us a good overview of her past, even if it's vague. She's a young woman who's seen how the world is- though she's brilliant, she's consistently stepped over and ignored. She's jaded and guarded, distrustful and proud. She does what she has to in order to survive and be able to live on her own, freely. It’s something we see as a theme: she has constantly been denied things she needs or wants in favor of other people. She is self reliant... and even from the start it seems it's not because that's what she wants.

We know she doesn't trust people. We know she's got SOME reason for that, even if we don't see what that was. Gandra got stepped over and stepped on a lot in her childhood, as implied when she explains why she joined FOWL in the first place in “Beaks In the Shell.” She doesn't even trust Fenton, who we’ve seen to be a genuinely good person, something that shows that in his deeds and actions... but like Orpheus, he's putting on a front to impress this beautiful, worldly girl. 

It isn't until he starts being genuine, being himself, that she warms up to him... and though she initially flees what she perceives as a threat and a dangerous situation, she still finds connection and safe harbor. Someone who makes her feel wanted.

And even if it's retrospective, her joining FOWL was not a moral choice, even if the choice bit her in the ass later. She felt like she had no other options.

And while their story doesn't end up the same, Fenton still has this as his goal. When they go after FOWL, his concern isn't the fate of the world- we see him fussing about Gandra's wellbeing to Drake and Launchpad. Despite their own opinions, he knows he is willing to walk into hell to save this girl.

And though he gets distracted helping other people trapped in the library...

...he still goes through with it.

At least Fenton and Gandra got to make it out lmao.

I know the connection probably wasn't intended this deeply but it's interesting how it worked out!

[lizzaroona]

On the Subject of Magicstone

Alright, so I'll admit- Ducktales 2017 is the first thing I've gotten into related to all the classic Disney characters. I haven't seen the old shows, I haven't read any of the old comics, I don't know much about the old lore (I'm gonna start investigating these things though haha)

I do know some basic facts, though. Anyone has heard that this is the best reincarnation and least toxic Daisy yet. But something I've also heard a lot about is Magicstone (Magica x Gladstone) and how people have very mixed feelings about it. Again, I don't know all of the facts, but from what I've heard, Magica only dates Gladstone to get at Scrooge, developed mutual feelings, but eventually, they broke up anyway. (Maybe. There's probably more to it, or different storylines, but that's what I heard from one biased source about the ship lmao)

I don't want to take a specific side on the ship, but if Magicstone happens in the reboot, or if they allude to it at all, here are some things that I would be really interested in seeing:

Them actually deciding they like each other for who they are, and they start dating, no strings attached. They both are caring and non-toxic towards each other.

Magica starts dating Gladstone to use him and get back at Scrooge, buy over time, develops genuine feelings. This could be interesting for a number of reasons; it would be cool to see Magica get a redemption arc and change herself for the better because she cares about Gladstone. Obviously she would keep her same basic character traits, and no character is perfect (Gladstone, for example, can be pretty selfish and self-centered at times). Also to see her soften for someone just like Lena did in s1. Lena was using Webby, but we all know how that turned out. It'd be an interesting path to see the character go down the same path Lena did. Magica reforms herself, and Magicstone stays together.

Magica... Doesn't reform herself. And before I go on, that's ok! It's fun to see villains go through a redemption arc but it's also refreshing to see villains go through zero change regarding their ideals. And they stay as villains. Some characters work better that way, anyway! Magica so far is (was) probably one of the most threatening villains on the show (I say was because she wasn't much of a threat in season two. But she still has the potential and capabilities to become threatening again.)

So she uses Gladstone to get back at Scrooge, and she's being very toxic towards Gladstone. And, poor Gladstone, but there's a high chance that no one has ever liked him for him. He probably hasn't had many friends or genuine relationships, because when people seem like they want to get close to him, chances are it's only because of his luck. So of course Gladstone is gonna cling tightly to a relationship where she doesn't seem to care about that. And he'd be right, to an extent. She'd only care about Scrooge. And because Gladstone is insecure, he'd be willing to look past the glaring toxicity in the relationship. But throughout the season, or maybe a certain big moment, will help Gladstone realize how toxic the relationship is, and there can be a scene where he breaks up with Magica. It'd be cool to see someone stand up to Magica, and DuckTales address toxic relationships, since they've already done so much family representation already. We've already seen toxic relationships in regards to Magica and Lena, but seeing it in a romantic relationship would be slightly different, and intriguing to see how it plays out.

A moment where Gladstone breaks up with Magica could be a huge turning moment for her character here as well. It can act as an analysis for her as a person and how she's toxic. Sure, she's a villain, but when we think of villains, we think of big, loud, evil people. But toxicity is a lot quieter than that. While writing this I'm thinking of Bojack Horseman, who was never trying to be evil or mean, but ended up toxic and harmful to the people around him nonetheless. Magica has been shown to be both a villain who wants to defeat the world's richest duck, and as a toxic individual, who has emotionally scarred many people she's come into contact with. If Gladstone were to break up with her, it could put her in her place, and cause her to start rethinking her choices and actions. Maybe not a full on redemption, but... Backing off a bit.

And maybe you're thinking, why Gladstone of all people? How would he be able to leave Magica speechless? We'll, either Gladstone's more scary angry than we think, or... It's a mixture of the two theories. Sure the first theory already kinda was that, but I didn't plan ahead on writing this so 😅. Anyway, this pathway could be "Magica uses him, grows to like him, they break up anyway" plotline, like the biased source said happened in the comics. And that way it could show how painful it can be to cut off from a toxic person, which would be even more maturity (not saying that's a bad thing!). I've dealt with toxic people in my life, and a lot of people don't mention that when you do have to inevitably cut yourself off from them, it's still painful. Gladstone and Magica may love each other in this circumstance, but they've got too much baggage, and they're not a good fit for each other... At least not yet. That can always change, but they choose to go their seperate ways for now, and this can spark Magica's road to a possible redemption.

Or, probably the most possible option: it doesn't happen. Maybe they make a reference to it, and they interact a couple times in The Phantom and The Sorceress, but that's about it. And that would be perfectly okay too! Because we honestly don't need a ship there. But I have faith in this DuckTales reboot; they've exceeded my expectations time and time again, and they have the capabilities to tell mature stories. And this could be another one, exploring toxic romantic relationships. Or, maybe so, they could do the opposite, and make a healthy version of Magicstone. After all, this show does have the healthiest version of Dondaisy ever seen yet!

I'm not sure what to expect from the upcoming episodes, and part of me doubts they'll have time for a Magicstone storyline amongst all the Fowl plotlines. And I personally don't need one! But it's still fun to theorize and wonder what might happen between them if Ducktales does go this route.

[she-toadmask]

I’m in a mood tonight so have me rambling about my music tastes below the cut

Eclectic is a good word for my music tastes like

In theory I like musical theater, in practice I have a few shows I know and like, a few songs that came on a tv radio thing from a musical I have heard nothing else from, and little to no opinion on anything else. Chicago? Great. Sweeney Todd? Haven’t listened in a while, has a couple of no-no songs, pretty good. Little Shop of Horrors? Haven’t found a recording I like for Dentist but the music is great. CATS? 2019 fucked up the music, London cast recording is where it’s at, shame that Growltiger is so racist because the parts that aren’t being racist are great fun (London not Broadway). There are definitely others (Mean Girls is fun, Be More Chill is pretty fun too, I really like the junior version of Seussical’s music, Something Rotten has a lot of fun songs), and while I’m not a Disney stan or anything I do like the style of a lot of the music, especially villain songs, sometimes I want songs that are like Disney villain songs in style but aren’t those songs specifically and it is so hard to figure out how to look that up and it is frustrating. Most things not on that list...I probably haven’t listened to and therefore have no opinion. (Phantom of the Opera is not my vibe though I’m sorry it is important because it’s been running for so long but that is just not my type of music)

I like late 2000s to mid 2010s pop music, that was when my dad got some CDs for a birthday or something and then I ended up listening to them a lot for some reason, also when I liked Just Dance a lot and listened to the radio in the car going places. There are definitely older songs I like and probably a few more recent ones but really that’s the time frame where I liked the most mainstream music. Not that that’s a good or bad thing, it’s just a thing.

Specific artists, when it comes to music that isn’t fan music, Voltaire and Creature Feature are my favorites. Most songs of theirs I’ve listened to, I like.

There are also probably some other artists that I like a lot of their songs but don’t pay enough attention to recognize they’re the same group in those songs, mostly thanks to this one Creepypasta-themed playlist that obviously had a lot of edgy music. Lots of MCR, Set it Off is a group that I’ve heard a number of good songs from, Hollywood Undead (apparently maybe there was some member drama, idk I just like what I’ve heard both pre- and post-whatever happened), probably some other groups with multiple songs.

And then there’s fan content. Random Encounters is my long-term favorite, the tone of the music is generally pretty light, idk they do a slight musical theater style (they call their songs ‘musicals’ so yeah that’s a vibe), and while their members have changed, the music is still really fun. The Stupendium! I found him pretty recently and boy I’m glad I did, he does more rap-style content, like a number of his songs are raps, but don’t let that turn you off before giving it a listen. Even outside of being about the game itself, a few of his songs just slap really hard, a few being very very anti-capitalist or just social commentary because of the source game, and just very very good. The Fine Print is a really really really good one that is also ‘capitalism sucks’, It’s A Joy isn’t really capitalism-related but someone could probably write a thinkpiece about societal stuff with it, I haven’t listened to it as much but A Matter of Factories (not to be confused with the similarly named A Matter of Facts, a rap that is just a bunch of trivia, sparked by a challenge by another channel) is also pretty anti-capitalist and anti-imperialism, another that isn’t exactly anti-capitalist but more an examination of society and stuff is Vault Number 76. I don’t even know much about any of the source games (aside from 76 being a glitchy nightmare lmao) but the songs all still slap. I almost forgot about Nook Line and Sinker, another wonderful anti-capitalism song. (Adding in A Purpose for New London. More social examination. I like the other guy’s ending better on a vocal level, but both are very very good.) (somehow I forgot Doctor! Doctor! which has its humor from the game it’s about but also has bits about how private healthcare is fucked up. The Stupendium is British BTW) If you just want some fun shit, he’s got that too. The Most Fashionable Faction is just a fun TF2 rap, An Impostor Calls is one of the collab songs he did with another guy and it’s pretty fun, I only have heard one ending of the Lego vs Minecraft rap battle but it seems pretty fun, These Hallowed Wings is a lighthearted one, Why Did I Say Okie Doki? is DDLC vibes of course so creepy but also with some upbeat to it (does that even make sense), Losing My Patients is kinda fucked up because Surgeon Simulator but it’s also really fun, What A Fowl Day is a very very good one, Way Deeper Down is good if you like Undertale (it’s also just genuinely good and fun). Honestly the only two I would rather skip when listening to him on shuffle are the two that have him partnering with SquigglyDigg, neither of the songs have anything wrong with them particularly I just. remember Squiggly’s awful takes on Lilo and Stitch and how she is the kind of person that’s like ‘you can call yourself whatever you want but there are only two genders’ and is miffed when people don’t recognize she’s a girl from her (drawn) profile pic like she gets upset about people trying to be polite because she disagrees with them being respectful to nb people or some shit

Also I like lyrics a lot and sometimes I can just go off vibes (like I don’t really like the really really heavy metal stuff like it’s really annoying when I’m like ‘I want a song about a deal with another power’ and all that comes up is either really heavy metal that is just loud and I don’t know what they’re saying (I’M NOT DISSING IT IT JUST ISN’T MY TYPE OF MUSIC) or a type of blues or something that also isn’t usually what I’m after at that time) but I also have a lot of appreciation for good lyrics and lyrics about stuff I like (which led to my friend being weirded out because she doesn’t listen as closely to lyrics as I do so when I tried to share some Stupendium songs she was just listening to the vibes and was like ‘you listen to weird music’) so like what it’s about matters

Also Biggering slaps. That is very tangential but it just slaps, go listen to it. How Bad Can I Be is fine I guess, like it’s catchy and all, but Biggering is just so much better. (The fact that multiple people have written video essays about Biggering and that movie should speak to how good it is. At least go listen once you can look it up on YouTube it’s just really good)

Also mental animatics are a thing. They just are. So that also can affect how I feel about a song.

Oh and The Cog Is Dead has a lot of good songs, how did I forget them

[miserelysia]

“I Watched the Artemis Fowl Movie and It Made Me Very Upset” Liveblog!

So I decided I had to subject myself to this movie despite being Extremely Aware that it’s a massive pile of firey garbage. It was about as painful as expected, so I liveblogged to keep my sanity. Here’s basically what happened in my head while I was watching:

Josh Diggums: I feel so bad for Josh Gad's voice because it's painfully obvious they just didn't want Olaf showing up so they forced him into some terrible Bale-Batman voice that keeps cracking

why is this movie taking itself so seriously

Book Artemis: eternally unathletic dweeb

Movie Artemis: SURFING MASTER

the fuck, Branagh

THIS VOICE IS SO DAMN BAD, JOSH PLEASE STOP TALKING

okay Artemis is appropriately a little shit for EXACTLY ONE SCENE

FUCK OFF WITH FRIDGING THE MOM, BRANAGH

"ur mom's dead and ur dad's gone so ur a little shit" WHAT A GREAT COUNSELOR

fuck's sake

Book Artemis: immediately falls off whatever this hover thing is

COLIN FARRELL. SEXY MAN.

I ALMOST FORGIVE THEM FOR BRINGING HIM BACK EARLY

AND..... KNOWING ABOUT MAGIC

SDJFKSDF

WHATEVER

I WAS PREPARED FOR THIS

this voice is still terrible, Josh. I'm sorry

this kid is a pretty good actor

"all i really want is to believe in you" that was actually well-delivered

"Arty"

<sobbing>

OKAY IT'S NOT ACCORDING TO THE BOOK BUT FUCK ME THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS WELL DONE

i desperately need Butler to show up soon tho

I SPOKE TOO SOON

"DOMOVOI" ??!!?? YOU FUCKS

why

are his eyes

fucking ELECTRIC BLUE

HIS LITERAL FUKDFSUCING NAME IN THE BOOKS IS 'BUTLER' IT'S PART OF BEING AN INSANELY GOOD SECRET AGENT GUARDIAN HE'S NOT AN ACTUFL FUCKING BUTLER AND LITERALLY NO ONE EVER CALLS HIM "THE BUTLER" BUT HIS NAME IS BUTLER BECAUSE HIS REAL NAME IS SECRET HE'S FUCKING SECURITY FUCKING DID YOU READ THIS FUCKING BOOK SERIES AT ALL BRANAGH OR DID YOU JUSTDSJFKLDSHFSD:LFSEFAGH

i'm sorry

Butler is my absolute favorite character of the entire damn series and they fucking

can't even get OOOONNNNNEEEEEEEEE CHARACTER CORRECT

SCREAMS

did they think calling him "Butler" would be weird because they cast a black guy?????

AGAIN WHY WITH THE FUCKING ELECTRIC BLUE CONTACTS THEY'RE SO OBVIOUSLY FAKE IT LOOKS SO BAD. IF YOU MAKE THE DECISION TO CAST AN AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN JUST FUCKING OWN THAT HE HAS DARK EYES DON'T DO THIS

THE "OWL STAR"???? REALLY???? WHY NOT FOWL STAR

WHY

NOT

IT'S JUST SUCH AN ARBITRARY DUMBASS CHANGE IT MAKES NO SENSE

PLEASE DID I JUST MISUNDERSTAND THE REPORTER MAN

DID THE CAPTIONS JUST MISUNDERSTAND HIM?????

NOPE IT'S LITERALLY THE  O W L  S T A R

fuck off

i'm sorry

stuff like that just bothers me a lot

it makes ABSOLUTELY no sense to change it

Fowl Star made sense bECAUSE IT'S OWNED BY ARTEMIS FOWL

artemis has a lot more emotions than i remember him having

i will not forgive them for destroying the Butler/Artemis relationship in favor of a Dad they fucking fridge in the first half hour of the movie

oh boy nursery rhymes as codes

GROUNDBREAKING

i think the fairies would have something to say about you hiding their own shit from them, MISTER SENIOR

it's still a bad voice, Josh, I'm so sorry

okay Haven is pretty nice

"Haven" not "Haven City"

pretty sure

holly being a 13 year old girl is disconcerting

that was mentioned in a review

they're supposed to be Child-Sized not ACTUAL CHILDREN

also "small person = higher pitched voice" is such a stupid trope please stop

i like the Being diversity around the city

like lots of different types of humanoids

josh desperately wants to do the Olaf voice

i'm so sorry Josh

okay aside from the shit voice Diggums is pretty good

lol Cudgeon's already in jail

i

okay then

i know this is Opal Koboi

meh

i hate her in the books so they can fuck her up all they want

judi dench is batman too i guess

how many cigs you smoke judi root

OH BOY HOLLY HAS MISSING DADDY ISSUES TOO

fucking shit

"you're 84" and you look like a fUCKING THIRTEEN YEAR OLD

such bad choices

every time they say "Domovoi" i--

HISDFHSDHFH

JULIET

SHE'S

HIS

FUCKING

NIECE?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????

SDFJLS:DKF FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK YYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

FUCK YOU

FUCK

FUCK

FUCK YOU KENNETH BRANAGH

NO

NO

NO

NO

SHE'S

HIS

FUCKING

SISTER

HIS BABY SISTER HE LOVES AND CARES FOR EVEN MORE THAN ARTEMIS AND THAT'S A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT RELATIONSHIP THAN UNCLE AND NIECE

HOW COULD YOU LITERALLY DESTROY EVERYTHING ABOUT BUTLER AND STILL SLEEP AT NIGHT

<vomits into the sun>

eoin colfer i hope you made so much money off of this SHITSTACK

(genuinely tho that's literally the only consolation; now he can write more Good Books)

Juliet is cute but i know about all she does is make sandwiches

so fuck this

judi dench is Good

foaly is Okay

why's he wearing clothes tho

the chutes are a lot more... open than expected

BEECHWOOD SHORT THE TRAITOR

FUCK OFF

WHY IS HOLLY’S CHARACTER DEFINED BY HER FUCKING FATHER

THIS IS SO MUCH WORSE AN OUTCOME THAN I EVEN EXPECTED GIVEN THEY EVISCERATED HER CHARACTER'S DRIVE BY MAKING THE L.E.P. ALREADY HAVE FEMALE OFFICERS AND COMMANDERS

"get out cudgeon before i throw you out" okay they got Root completely right at least

aside from making him a her

but that's okay

because it's Judi Dench

awwwww happy flying scene bUT HOLLY YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SHIELDED GOt DAMN

“any update?” "yes. i'm freezing" amazing, Butler

i mean dOmOvOi

HOLLY YOU'RE STILL NOT SHIELDED

CGI isn't too bad in this but honestly that's not impressive anymore

awwwww cute wedding scene

troll is about as ugly as possible

LOL JUST FUCKING THROW TIME FREEZE UP LIKE IT'S NOTHING

OKAY

LOL HOLLY GO DEAL WITH THE TROLL DON'T FOCUS ON ONE SMALL CHILD

THAT'S NOT HOW A TIME FREEZE WORKS

I

i mean it's COOL

i love the little Men in Green zipping around

but it doesn't make ANY sense

LOL SO WHY DO THE PEOPLE THINK THE PLACE IS TRASHED

lol gently floating troll

Hollyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Judi Root continues to be amazing

ok tbf Opal Koboi would be after the Aculos if it existed

OP MacGuffin plots are so tired tho like really Branagh

i love the wings on her suit

ARTEMIS WHEN DID YOU GET TO THE TREE

holly ur a bad 84-year-old officer

LOL CUDGEON IS RIGHT ON

AND JUDI ROOT CONTINUES TO BE

"Not Happy!" lol wat

who wrote that bit of dialogue and said "yes this a perfectly good thing to have her say when she wakes up in a cage"

"mesmerism"

boy i love these exposition dump convos between Mr. Sr. and Arty

LOL "most human beings are afraid of gluten, how do you think they'd handle goblins" is a great line

out of touch, but still funny

...why does the time freeze take forever to generate now when you did it in TWO SECONDS BEFORE

calm down holly damn

foaly's very pretty

sO DID THEY FREEZE THE *ENTIRE WORLD*????????

I THOUGHT THE POINT WAS TO FREEZE THINGS INSIDE SO YOU HAVE MOONLIGHT LONGER

AND

AND

whatever

i love this fucking ARMY coming out of literally everywhere

"TOP OF THE MORNIN'" OH MY FUCKING GOODNESS

whole movie is worth it

for that line

i love that they're entirely in green

and no one ever Shields

ever

they mentioned Shields once but NO ONE IS SHIELDED

BUTLER WOULD NEVER LET ARTEMIS INTO A FIGHT

SCREAMS

"TAKE THE SHOT"

WHY IS THE TIME FREEZE SO EASILY DESTABILIZED

FOALY

ARE YOU TELLING ME NO ONE HAS EVER SHOT YOUR FUCKING ENORMOUS DEVICE

omg no U GAVE OPAL KOBOI LEGITIMATE REASONS FOR DOING WHAT SHE'S DOING

YOU GAVE HER A SAD FRUSTRATING BACKSTORY

SHE'S SUPPOSED TO BE AN ARROGANT SELF-SERVING BITCH AND NOTHING ELSE

TWENTY SEVEN MINUTES??????

hOW DID ARTEMIS KNOW ABOUT MULCH DIGGUMS SPECIFICALLY

lol that is 100% a completely inhumane prison what the fuck, fairies

why does Holly have human music

well i'm glad we didn't have to watch mulch almost eat a dude's head

"My father was kidnapped."

"My father is dead."

"Can I trust you?"

"You'll have to."

BUT WHY

WHAT IS THIS DIALOGUE

WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER PROGRESSION

THERE's NO REASON TO TRUST HER

OR TO NEED TO TRUST HER

THIS IS COMPLETELY UNEARNED AND STUPID

glad holly's entire character REVOLVES AROUND A MAN NOW, BRANAGH

LOL THEY JUST DIDN'T GIVE ROOT A FIRST NAME???

JUDI ROOT CONFIRMED

"listen to us, grunting at each other like a pair of hippos with a throat infection" LMAO

i hope that was Josh Gad improv

LOL HE JUST FUCKING DESTROYS EVERYTHING IN HIS WAY WHILE TUNNELING

YOU DIDN'T EVEN REALLY TUNNEL IN, MULCH

HOW DID YOU COME OUT OF A PAINTING

DO THEY HAVE PAINTINGS IN A BASEMENT???

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SHEETROCK OR WHATEVER

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO EASY TO JUST

UGH

FOLLOW THE BOOK

COME ON

MULCH YOU ARE THE WORST BURGLAR

"what would your parents be" THEY'D BE CENTAURS MULCH

is... is Mulch on the second floor

HE TUNNELED THROUGH THE WALL ONTO THE SECOND FLOOR

artemis... just.. lets holly out

ok cool

LOL HIS NOSE HAIRS GROW AND MOVE LIKE TENTACLES

stupid and... funny? i guess

at least Cudgeon is the piece of shit he is in the book lol

oh boy troll time

BUTER WOULD NEVER LET MULCH DIGGUMS PICKPOCKET HIM

"jam all magic" OMFG THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE

BUTLER WOULD NEVER LET ARTEMIS FACE DOWN A FUCKING TROLL

LOL THEY JUST FIRE THE TROLL LIKE A BULLET

A TROLL-ET

DOMOVOI YOU ARE COMPLETELY USELESS WHAT THE FUCK

i wonder if kids even like this movie

omg butler couldn't even jump

i

i don't understand

he literally DOESN'T HELP AT ALL

IT'S HIS WHOLE THING

IS BEING ABLE TO KICK ASS

FUCKING COME ON BRANAGH

yeah fuck you branagh

are... are the fairies just DYING TO THE TIME FREEZE COLLAPSE???

"goodbye my friend. i'm sorry i was FUCKING USELESS"

branagh you're trying to activate my feelings with this Sad Death Scene(TM) but i am IMPERVIOUS because artemis has had NO RELATIONSHIP WHATSOEVER WITH THIS """DOMOVOI"""

COOL HE'S BACK NOW I’M SO GLAD ACTUAL FULL ON DEATH HAS ZERO CONSEQUENCES NOW THANKS TO OP FAIRY MAGIC

WHAT GREAT WRITING THIS IS

"i didn't cry did i" FUCK OFF

WHY IS IT SO DANGEROUS WHEN THE TIME FREEZE ENDS

WHY IS YOUR TECH SO SHITTY, FOALY

TIME FREEZES AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE DANGEROUS TO THE OCCUPANTS

THAT GOES AGAINST ALL OF FAIRY RULES

...okay and then it just ends..........?

Domovoi: "you have to try!"

Artemis: "i can't, tho"

Domovoi: "it's too dangerous!"

WHAT IS THIS DIALOGUE

WHO WROTE THIS ABSOLUTE DRIVEL

"the aculos for my father"

THE L.E.P. DOESN'T EVEN HAVE YOUR FATHER YOU ABSOLUTE DOOF

holly how do u know how to do this

the... the aculos is just the fucking Book?

i feel slapped in the face

she just recites the words and. and.

whatever

whatever

i'm done

GO FIND YOUR DAD WHO'S MAGICALLY BACK

WHY WOULD HE BE IN THE BED ARTEMIS

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A GENIUS

this girl who plays Holly cannot act

i'm sorry girl

MAGICALLY BACK DAD

HOORAY HOLLY'S CHARACTER CONTINUES TO BE DEFINED BY HER FATHER

FUCK

YOU

WRITERS

AND BRANAGH

BUTLER WOULD NEVER CRY, DOMOVOI

i like the cool earpiece they gave Judi Root to maybe? disguise her hearing aid?

Haven does look pretty cool

too much water above tho it’s not Atlantis guys come on

"i'm a criminal mastermind" LITERALLY WHEN DID YOU SHOW ANY SORT OF MASTERMIND BEHAVIOR OR CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR

BESIDES BRIEFLY KIDNAPPING HOLLY AND THEN IMMEDIATELY LETTING HER OUT

LMAO THAT LAST SHOT OF JULIET JUST LOOKING EXCITEDLY OUT OF THE WINDOW AT THE HELICOPTER WHILE EVERYONE LEAVES HER BEHIND

WHAT'S THE POINT OF THAT EVEN

THIS POOR GIRL YOU’RE JUST LEAVING HER ALONE

WOW THIS PRISON/INTERROGATION PLACE HAS LIKE

NO SECURITY

HI HOLLY WHY ARE YOU HERE??????

THIS WHOLE ENDING IS JUST THE STUPID CAP ON TOP OF A STUPID SUNDAE

i need to go listen to the books again now

[boydgearloose]

Hey, you! As a fic writer I’m terribly interested in your fowl sitcom idea. I think it’s got a lot of potential. You wouldn’t be up to sharing details about it would you?

anon you have no idea how thrilled i was when i saw this ask LOL i’ve literally been talking about fowl and how i see their dynamic in my head for AGES! i could fill several pages with thoughts i’ve had involving the group and how they interact with each other, both humorous and serious. but this seems to be asking for the more funny lighthearted approach so allow me to put it into words to my best ability. here’s a rundown of how i see each character:

bradford: the boss who’s done with everyone’s shit. i don’t think about him that much but he’s definitely the most competent, that’s basically canon. idk anything about the other two buzzards though...iirc only one of them has a name so far? lmao

black heron: total mad scientist. i honestly wish this part of her character was utilized more in fan content because it’s so INTERESTING. she canonically did surgery on steelbeak i mean. come on. anyway, she is probably the most competent after bradford and the oldest (minus rockerduck) by quite a bit. sometimes she feels like she has to babysit the other agents. she isn’t entirely wrong to feel that way

steelbeak: there’s not much i can say here that double o duck didn’t already show but he’s definitely the butt of a lot of jokes within the dynamic, a wild card who’s extremely unhinged and impulsive. he definitely likes to do really dumb shit to impress the other agents and almost gets himself killed every time. he does get along begrudgingly well with gandra and possibly others but going into that dynamic is a whole other story that i’ll hopefully tell one day. and we all know how he is with black heron, that’s a fun one

gandra: she’s the youngest ofc. her and steelbeak aren’t too far apart (maybe 4 or 5 years) but he thought she was 13 when they first met and it took him a few months to realize how old she really was. despite this, she's very capable and one of the smartest members. i think she’s a pretty high-ranking agent despite her age and it’s definitely well-deserved. a lot of fowl’s plans would fall apart without gandra...which is funny because she’s definitely not gonna stay there

phantom blot: ok. here we go. so yes i know that we know absolutely nothing about this guy other than he’s funso and whatever frank hinted (yes i do know it all off the top of my head, no i won’t go into it because the fact that i have MEMORIZED this shit is embarrassing) but i have found myself preemptively attached and very much so. i’ve managed to temporarily fill in the blanks by coming up with some pretty sweet lore based on my own thoughts and older blot content that i want to drop in fic-form sometimes before it’s squashed by canon and have absolutely fallen in love with this character while doing so. despite this, i’ll keep my answer here on the shorter side. i don’t think many people in fowl know much about blot? he likes to keep to himself, finding comfort in the air of mystery he puts on to throw everyone off. most of the agents are intimidated by him and rightfully so, for he is rather terrifying and prides himself on it. other than that, he actually doesn’t really HATE his job as funso. despite everything, he’s not bad with kids. plus, he’s probably the only person in the universe who genuinely enjoys funso’s pizza. there’s a lot more i could say here but then it’ll turn into a “saturn’s self-indulgent phantom blot lore” post and not a fowl dynamic post so i’ll end it by saying that i REALLY love the idea of him slowly becoming closer to some of his co-workers :”) i think he’s a really overdramatic and almost silly guy deep down inside (but in an evil and fucked up way) and if he got to know someone, that side of him would really shine!

rockerduck: he expects a lot more respect than he’s gonna get from this crew, i'll just say that. jeeves is really the only one who listens to him and everyone else kind of views him as a small angry old man who they spent hours unthawing from a block of ice. also, he’s hilariously gullible from culture shock and gandra takes advantage of this the most. she kinda has it out for him because he’s a rich bastard and she doesn’t vibe with that. he gets along with jeeves and...not really anyone else. sorry rockerduck. he’s kind of the group loser :(

jeeves: i’ve admittedly thought about him the least. he kinda just interacts with rockerduck i think? he can’t talk or anything so not many of the other fowl agents want to get to know him. but he has a softer side, as we saw at the end of outlaw scrooge mcduck. i do wonder if that might come back into play sometimes in canon. also it’s fun to imagine him doing shit like knitting sweaters with that awful look on his face that he probably can’t even wipe off

and...that’s about it! this got REALLY long and rambly so i apologize for that but hopefully it gave you what you need and if you have any questions, please ask because i cannot describe how much i love talking about these guys!!!

[notrobyn]

okay gang i watched artemis fowl and my thoughts are SO LONG. (i literally was taking notes everytime something struck me lmao) so this is obvs gonna be under a read more!! (also there’s probs minor spoilers sorry!!)

the tl;dr for my opinion though is: it’s probably fine if you read the books but weren’t that into them. like if ur a hardcore fan u will be most likely not be that impressed, and if u have never read the books i am FASCINATED to know if u kept up with the plot!! there were bits i didn’t understand at all lol

okay so point no. 1 is that to me most of the changes from the book felt either a little unnecessary or straight up pointless. point no. 2 is that i don’t know how to organise my thoughts so im gonna separate these out by character lmaooooo i have s o much beef.

artemis fowl ii: the actor is sweet! he’s having fun, we’re introduced to him via him surfing and then on a lil hoverboard thing with one wheel? which is a frankly bizarre choice for book!artemis who notably doesn’t do physical activity. (this is a dumb thing but until about 2/3rds of the way through he wears jeans. unheard of for this lil snob). He’s also called ‘Arty’ several times without rebelling. aside from that though he really didn’t start out too badly!! we see him with his guidance counsellor where he is as much a little shit as he is in the book, he’s very self-assured and he clearly knows what he’s talking about.  It does kind of go downhill from there though - his character development pretty much doesn’t even start and by the end of the film I have NO idea what his motivations or even his personality are.  We hear more characters straight up Telling us “ARTEMIS IS SMART AND ALSO SCARY” than we see evidence of it.

artemis fowl i: the dad! this is Colin Farrell. which is fine. he’s fine. He wasn’t really in the first book since he’d been kidnapped before the events and wouldn’t be rescued til the next one but he’s.....not bad! He doesn’t give me ‘criminal mastermind’ vibes and he certainly doesn’t seem to have passed any of that down to Arty II.  The whole ‘hostage’ shit was wild, i’ll talk abt that later lmao

butler: oh MAN did they misuse butler!!! I fucking LOVE book!butler. he’s such a perfect surrogate-father-figure to Arty while being totally in charge of his welfare and stuff like I literally love him. what a badass. but in the film......he’s basically just the fowl’s servant??? Like he’s not even specifically in charge of Arty? He goes on stakeout on his own, he knows all about Artemis Fowl I’s private collections and secrets, and worst of all - Arty calls him Dom/Domovoi. What the fuck. (he also at no point puts on a suit of armour)

juliet butler: god okay I also love juliet, she’s so cool. change no. 1 to juliet is that she’s about artemis’s age? I’m pretty sure she was older. but not convinced. change no. 2 is that she’s butler’s niece??? why? what a pointless change. She’s really not in this film a lot, even parts that in the book were for her have been changed. don’t love that

holly short: okay, holly short in the books is my absolute fav. she’s the first female officer in LEPrecon, she’s making waves, she’s held to a higher standard and is angry about it.  but film!holly........she’s just sort of a normal fairy. Apparently her dad was some kind of human sympathiser so I guess she’s working through that but other than that she just seems nice. Not much characterisation, she’s the same height as Arty though so I guess he must be 1m tall. Cool uniform, cool wings, she did say D’Arvit once.

mulch diggums: tbh I did like him in the books but he got overwhelming in the film. He’s like....the main framing of the film? So it’s like him reporting everything that happened to HUMAN police (wtf). but for some reason he’s really tall. Why is he really tall. The jaw unhinging is truly horrific to watch though which is tbh probably the goal. idk he’s fine, he just...felt like too much, especially compared to the weaker characters of Arty and Holly.

julius root: so this is Judi Dench. and honestly it wasn’t awful. I was super worried about this one because having Commander Root be a woman genuinely takes away so much from Holly’s character of struggling in a male-dominated job. but since Holly didn’t have much of a character, judi did a fine job.  She wasn’t quite as angry but she is intimidating, and she did also say D’Arvit so that’s cool. I don’t hate it.

opal: why the fuck is opal in this film. she didn’t become an antagonist for a while. her motives were wild: there’s a new secret fairy artifact called an ‘aculos’ or ‘acuros’ (at no point did i understand what they were saying, i had it written as akhiros for ages) that artemis senior got hold of, so she kidnapped him to......get it? Even though she could have just stolen it? I don’t really understand this.

foaly: nowhere near as paranoid, nowhere near as fun. horse bit looked cool from a distance, BAD movement though.

OKAY that’s all the characters i can think of?? here’s some general shit though!!!!! sorry this is so long!!!!!

the music was great! it’s patrick doyle so that’s always good, but he did some really gorgeous things with having Irish-inspired folk music when we were in Fowl Manor and then an orchestral score for action scenes, and then darker music for Haven. I do like hearing those little bits weave in and out! 

didn’t love mulch being the framing device. not every film needs one, sometimes a film can just stand on its own!! kenneth branagh i hope you’re listening!!

don’t know why they didn’t just leave the main driving force behind arty kidnapping a fairy as being gold?? it had to be this weird new fairy secret acorn thing. nonsense.

there was a VERY confusing sequence with holly’s magic being “blocked” by the LEP that i would love to know if anyone understood. also if anyone actually understood the time freeze i very much did not. what was arty’s plan??? lmao

this is so long im so sorry. IN CONCLUSION: IT WAS FINE. I WILL NOT WATCH IT AGAIN, NOR DO I WANT THEM TO MAKE ANOTHER. I WISH IT HAD BEEN MORE ACCURATE BUT I UNDERSTAND SOME OF THE CHANGES WERE MADE FOR A DISNEY AUDIENCE. SOME OF THEM WERE NONSENSE THO.