#That being said - the sentiment is still relatable and I do understand what she's saying

[arachnion]

GQ: Why do you like math more than Korean?

WT: Yes. I think that if you do Korean somehow, you can find the answer. But numbers, math, are so certain. So, if I'm wrong, I can openly admit it and say, 'I was wrong.' That's really great. (Laughs)

WINTER x GQ KOREA 2024 WOMAN OF THE YEAR

[lunarsturniolo]

Everyone Loves You

“I met Matt and Y/N in an escape room,” the girl narrated, a poorly lit photo of the couple with the girl filling the screen. 

“She was sweet,” Matt mumbled, a fond smile growing on his face.

or

The fans loved you. 

masterlist

The fans love you, too

Sometimes, more than they love Matt. 

Maybe it’s the relatable nature of being an ordinary girl attending university classes in LA, or maybe it’s your witty humor. No matter what it was, you were loved, and the fans made sure you knew it. 

It was a busy day in LA, and you had just finished a couple of midterms the day prior. Matt decided to take the morning off and take you to brunch and coffee as a treat. 

Matt held your hand tightly as you dragged him around the area where you were grabbing brunch. You navigated through crowds, tugging on his hand slightly when you felt he was too far from you. 

“Do you wanna run into Zara?” You ask him with a wide grin. 

Matt sends you a matching smile- he can’t help but smile when you do. “Yeah, let’s go.” 

He lets go of your hand and wraps it around your waist, “I wanted to get some cargos,” he mentions quietly. 

You nod slightly, still a little flustered from how close he was to you, “Yeah, I can help you look,” you look up at him with a soft grin. He sends you an eager nod before helping up the steps of the store, headed towards the women’s section. 

You immediately begin picking through the clothing, holding things up to get a good view before draping them over your arm to try on later. It had been almost ten minutes of looking when you noticed there was a small group of girls following you both.

You turned around, a polite smile gracing your face, making eye contact with one of the girls. Matt was oblivious, still sifting through a rack, all while the girls waved. 

“Hi,” you say simply. Matt hears your voice and turns towards you, finally noticing the girls behind him. He gives them a pretty big smile and waves as well. 

This elicits a small gasp from one of the girls, “Hi, my name is Emma! I love your YouTube videos!” 

You smile, looking at Matt, “Hey, Emma. Thanks for the support. How are you guys?” He asks.

“Good,” they chime. 

Matt nods, “That’s good. Do you guys want a picture?” He asks

They nod eagerly, and another girl holds her phone out for a selfie.

“I can take a photo!” you say, ready to take her phone. 

“Oh,” the girl says, “We were hoping you could be in the photo.”

You break out into a large grin, “Yeah, I’d love to. What’s your name?”

“Hannah,” she says. 

“Hannah,” you repeat, “One of my best friends' names is Hannah!”

She blushes, “Did you post her on Instagram yesterday?” 

You let out a little laugh, “Yeah, I guess I did,” you say, “I haven’t seen her as much since school started.” 

Hannah nods in understanding, “I get that,” she says. 

With a bit of triumph, you look at the last girl, “And what’s your name?” 

“I’m Liza,” she says softly. 

“Hi, Liza. I’m Y/N,” you joke, “Do you want to talk for a minute, or are you in a hurry?”

Liza’s eyes dart between yours and Matt’s, “I have to go study for a final.”

You nod, “No, I totally get that. I just finished all of mine. No worries!” you smile, finally positioning yourself next to Matt. 

The three girls crouch in front of the two of you. You smile softly at the camera, and Matt holds up a peace sign. 

“Thank you guys so much,” Emma said. 

“Of course,” Matt says, “It was great to meet you guys.”

The girls echo Matt's sentiment, “Is there any way I could give you a quick hug before we leave?” 

“Oh yeah! Of course!” he says, finally relaxing a little bit, “That I can do.” 

The girls laugh, one by one giving Matt a hug before finally heading off towards the front of the store, “Bye, guys!” Matt calls out behind them.

“Good luck on your final, Liza,” you say, giving her shoulder a tight squeeze as she hugs you goodbye.

“You’re so good with them,” Matt comments. 

You let out a little laugh, “What do you mean?” 

He shrugs at you, “I can never think of what to say. You’re good at that,” he clarifies. 

You smile at him, “I have lots of practice talking to new people.” 

“Okay, Miss ‘I’m getting a degree’,” he teases with pride in his eyes. 

--

You were in bed with Matt lying on your chest, scrolling through his TikTok. He kept swiping through edits of himself in his brothers, cringing slightly whenever there was a sexual edit that would come up on his page. 

“You look good,” you comment as he scrolled past a video of himself.

“Mmm,” he hums, “Thanks, baby.” 

You nod in response, reaching up to play with his hair as he continues to scroll. 

You let out a sharp breath at the next video that shows up. It is an edit to the song ‘My Love Mine All Mine’ by Mitski that compiles all the clips of you and Matt that have surfaced in vlogs and the only car video you were in. 

Matt quickly likes the video and leaves a comment of just the goat emoji. You snort at his comment as he adds the video to his favorites. 

“Everyone loves you,” he says as he scrolls through comments.

“What do you mean?” you reply. 

He shifts his phone up to be at your eye level, letting you scroll through the comments yourself. There were about 200, all of which were giving you excessive praise. The comments ranged from “Y/N is so unbelievably pretty” to “I love how they look at each other”. You were really feeling the love.

You hum a reply to Matt, allowing him to lower his phone and continue through his for you page. One of the next videos he stumbled upon was a video of a girl who they had met earlier that day. 

“I met Matt and Y/N in an escape room,” the girl narrated, a poorly lit photo of the couple with the girl filling the screen. 

“She was sweet,” Matt mumbled, a fond smile growing on his face. 

You nod in response, focused on the video. “Basically, I had gone to do an escape room with my friends from the fandom I met on TikTok, and as we were walking into the building, I see Nick, Madi, and Chris running to their car,” she says. The next photo that appears on the screen makes Matt let out a belly laugh- a photo of Nick's blonde hair behind a sprinting Chris flooded the screen.

“Obviously, I’m not gonna follow them to their car,” the girl paused, “That would be really weird,” she said. 

“That would be,” you nod in response. 

“So, my friends and I just keep walking. I’m pretty shocked at this point because I just saw some of the coolest people I’ve ever met, but it gets better!” She exclaims.

Then comes the photo of the three of you. You are standing particularly close to Matt, his hand around your waist, and the girl on the other side of you. You smile softly at the photo; you and Matt look adorable. 

“Y/N and Matt come walking out super calmly. Like they weren’t running like everyone else was. So I quickly tried to catch them. I call out Matt’s name, and both of them turn to look at me. Y/N immediately waves and drags Matt over to me with this huge smile on her face.”

You blush and look down at Matt in a fleet of embarrassment, “God, I hate being perceived like this.” 

Matt chuckles in response, “I know, right.”

He refocuses his attention on the video, “Basically, the two of them came up to us and talked to us for like 15 minutes before we had to go in and do our escape room. But I could tell that Y/N was doing a super good job of helping him talk to us and make him feel comfortable because he was cracking jokes and seemed super excited the whole time!” the girl concluded. 

Matt smiles before opening up the comments once again. This time, the comments were flooded about how great you are for making Matt feel comfortable in his own skin. He points a few out to you before he stumbles upon a different comment. 

“I can just feel how in love they are from how close they are standing,” Matt reads out loud, “Damn right, we’re in love,” he laughs, looking up at you, puckering his lips for a kiss. 

[talshiargirlfriend]

How to Pet Name Your Vulcan

Happy birthday (month) @strze-lec ! 🥳

You requested fluff and it doesn’t get much fluffier than this 666 word confection…

“Hey, can you pass me that… honey?” Trip asked, grinning cheekily across the table. He had been trying to feel T’Pol out on pet names for a while, mostly in jest. Baby was obviously completely out of the question, but maybe he’d stumble upon something she could appreciate. Or at least tolerate.

T’Pol handed him the jar with what could only be described as a put upon expression, and he chuckled. “Honey’s a no-go then?”

At her slight frown of distaste, he continued. “What about agave? You know, sweet but plant-based. And prickly,” he bobbed his eyebrows.

He expected her to change the subject, but as usual she surprised him.

“It is not that I find the sentiment disagreeable as such. I simply do not understand the preoccupation with food-related monikers.”

“Well,” Trip considered as he slathered honey on his toast. “I guess we tend to associate emotional sweetness with… well, literal sweetness. Verbally anyway. Maybe it’s a language thing? I don’t know how common that is across human cultures, but it’s what I grew up with.”

T’Pol eyed him over the rim of her mug. “In Vulcan I would simply refer to you as my beloved, or my t’hy’la.”

Trip’s heartbeat was suddenly incredibly loud in his ears. Time didn’t slow to a standstill, but it was one of those moments he almost wished it would. This seemed like something he was going to want to remember clearly later.

“You would call me your beloved?” He asked slowly, because he wanted to hear her say it again.

“Yes.” As though it were obvious.

“Well, then why haven’t you called me that before?” he asked curiously, hoping it didn’t sound petulant. “What was the other word - t’hy’la?” He tried out.

T’Pol gave a slight nod before looking down. “First, I believe calling you by your chosen nickname has a similar effect.”

He smiled shyly. “It does. Most people call me Trip, but it feels different when you say it. I wasn’t completely sure if that was just in my head though.”

She looked up at him through her lashes. She uttered no words, but just that soft look set his heart thundering again. Not all in his head then.

“And second?” he prompted when his thoughts caught up.

“I was uncertain if I could properly convey the cultural context of t’hy’la. It does not seem to translate well into your language.”

Trip pushed his plate aside and looked at her seriously. “Try?”

“It is most often translated as friend or lover, but it would be more accurate to say that it is the person closest to one’s katra. The pre-eminent person in one’s life regardless of whether the relationship is otherwise familial, platonic or romantic. There is no direct analogue.” T’Pol eyed him carefully, searching his face for comprehension.

Trip pursed his lips and let her words sink in, not wanting to stumble here. Moments of emotional openness with T’Pol were still pretty rare.

“So,” he hesitated. “It’s maybe kind of like a soulmate? Not like a destiny thing but like… the … the partner - of your heart? Your katra?”

“That is an acceptable explanation, if rather imprecise.” She lifted one eyebrow in a recognisably playful way, and he relaxed. He hadn’t mortally offended her with his clumsy interpretation of her language and culture.

“And that’s what you consider me?”

“It is,” she agreed softly.

He reached across the table to touch her hand gently. “Thank you for explaining it to me. I might not completely understand, but I think it’s really beautiful, my love.”

T’Pol tilted her head and gave him a very soft look. It wasn’t exactly a smile but it conveyed her affection and approval.

“Oh! You like that one?”

“It is preferable to being referred to as a type of sugar,” she said archly, and he chuckled.

“You win, my love. As much fun as it is teasing you, there’s something to be said for keeping it simple.”

“A logical conclusion, t’hy’la.”

—

I went with @jennelikejennay ‘s recent musings on the definition of T’hy’la for this one ☺️

[suzukiblu]

I love your Kara. I’m so used to her being a one note racist when it comes to Kon-angst. Don’t get me wrong. That’s entertaining for easy angst. But it’s never criticized by anybody. How is she still on the league?

It’s nice to see her be a supportive figure who is worried for him.

Ty! ❤️ I will say I haven't read too much of Kara in the comics (Mae and Linda were my OG Supergirl back in the day and I just vastly preferred them when I was doing most of my reading), so I mostly got her vibe and backstory through the cartoons and fandom osmosis and then extrapolated a few things I hadn't seen explored about her much IN fandom for the takes on her I've written. But like, I've only really seen her be, like, REALLY anti-clone in the New 52, so I don't like to characterize her too strongly by any anti-clone sentiments even if I do sometimes include a bit of them underscoring what she's thinking/doing. Like, more like the kind of low-level ingrained bias you get from growing up in a culture with some shitty beliefs that you haven't ever had a real reason to examine than anything genuinely hateful or anything you actually REALLY believe yourself, if that makes sense.

Also lbr, it's just more interesting to me to make Kara-related issues be things like culture clash and apocalyptic levels of grief and rage that most people around her don't understand and kinda just ignore and, like, an overall frustration with other people not having the cultural context to REALLY understand what she's saying/thinking/doing, a lot of the time. Like, this is a character with a dead planet and a dead SPECIES who if things had gone to plan probably would've been "Superwoman" LONG before Clark grew up enough to even develop powers at all, much less be SuperMAN, and who SHOULD be older and more mature/experienced than all of these superpowered adults that she got dumped in the middle of who historically do NOT do all that well with surprise teenagers while also having the possibility of growing up STRONGER than Clark but simultaneously getting shit on by both the narrative and said superpowered adults, and also she's just never seemed as integrated into the hero community as, like, Dick or Babs or Kon or Tim or whoever else. Like she's just that LITTLE bit disconnected from them all, it tends to feel like to me. So there's a lot to mine there, character-wise! Like way more than just one-note clone-racism!

Anyway tl;dr: I got a lil' carried away there but I love the whole entire concept of Kara and I always wanna write her being MUCH more complicated than I usually see her getting handled. I wanna do our girl some justice!!

[painted-bees]

part i

  Hitting a cafe during rush hour wasn’t Raf’s definition of a fun idea, and he was well practised in the art of saying ‘no’. Yet, for some reason or another, that skill failed to find him when the wide-eyed little Portasound busker insisted on treating him to a coffee.   

  The streets outside Granville Station were abuzz with traffic of all kinds. The wide sidewalks were, at least, accommodating to the amount of pedestrians that relied on them during the city’s busiest times of day. The same could not be said for the roads as cars rolled slowly forward, bumper to bumper. Still, the ambience was manageable despite all the bustle. Only the hissing, honking noises of transit bus breaks would coax the occasional wince out of him in their random, unpredictable intervals.

  The little Portasound busker, ‘Magritte’, kept up beside him in lock step. She hadn’t stopped talking since they began their walk together and, in honesty, he preferred it that way. She was a disheveled little thing, more than a head shorter than he was. Her manner of dress was as sloppy as the thick bundle of curly, dark red hair that flopped loosely atop her head. Her grey sweater was several sizes too large, covering her to the knees. With sleeves that hung far past her hands if she didn’t scrunch them in her palms. Black leggings were tucked into knock-off ugg boots whose soles had eroded so severely on the outer edge, Raf was concerned she’d roll an ankle if he made her walk too briskly. She smiled so vehemently as she spoke, that her lips rarely closed around consonants, making it difficult to understand her at times.

  “–so when my dad was like, ‘you can stay here and work, or you can move out and do your music stuff’, I moved out. That was like…oh–almost three years! I was eighteen. I just turned twenty-one today!” She accompanied that last sentence with a joyful little skip that caused Raf to turn his head and watch her.

  “Well, happy birthday.” He exhaled a small laugh. “Vancouver’s an expensive place to live, but house hunting here probably already gave you the full story on that.”

  “Rent’s insane,” Magritte echoed his small chuckle. “But the weather’s way more agreeable in the winter, which is what I’m after. And the music scene! I heard there were tons of musicians in Van, and look–I’ve already met two in the first few hours of being here!”

  “Oh, you’ll meet more.” The way he said it made it sound more cautioning than he intended and he diffused it with a snort. “Guess the music stuff must have paid off after all, if you can afford a place in the city.”

 There was silence between them and Magritte chewed the nail of her forefinger for a moment. “It actually hasn’t, I’m not a professional musician by any means. I’m just really good at finding a lot of short term work and stuff. Sometimes it’s music related, but not often enough to call it a living.” 

  “Mmh.” Raf glanced down at her. The bounce in her step had vanished and he watched her chew on her lip beneath a knitted brow. With a shrug he said, “You sounded good in the station, all things considered. You stopped, you listened, you came in at appropriate moments, you improvised really well. The pieces I played weren’t really…great for busking…and demanded a lot more than what your little keyboard could reasonably provide, but even your rests were composed and natural. You didn’t drop off abruptly any time the melody brought you past the range of your keys, you played into it.” He smirked. “I’m not gonna lie and say we did a great justice to Paganini today or anything, but I was very surprised by what you were able to pull off. I dunno, seemed like the chops of a professional to me.”

  That brought the bounce back into her step, though she continued to chew on her lower lip. Raf was content to see her spirits buoyed at least somewhat by his sentiments. He hadn’t embedded a single white lie into his assessment.

 They arrived at the cafe of his choosing; a popular spot, very near to the station, named Caffe Artigiano. The outside seating was full up with patrons, but Raf hoped the inside would be a quieter space to sit anyways. Opening the door, he followed Magritte in. It was busier than he would have liked, but he couldn’t have expected differently, considering the hour. Still, one thing he appreciated about the place was that it did not play music. Only the sound of numerous quiet conversations filled the air. Raf gravitated towards a freshly vacated table in a far corner, and Magritte followed him to it. Her gaze hung on the coffee menu that loomed above the counter. 

He waited for Magritte to pick her seat before gently offloading his violin case onto the seat across from her. “I’ll go order. Was it a latte you said you wanted?”

  “Actually…” She let out an indecisive little sigh. “A mocha, I think. I want…choco. Oh, but–!” She dropped her duffel bag onto the ground before unzipping a side pouch and pulling out the twenty dollar bill that had found its way into her upturned ball cap at the station. She held it out to him. “With this! Please?” 

  He hesitated before taking the bill from her. “Yes, ma’am.” There was no point in telling her that the twenty had been his before it became hers. The thought was what mattered.

  The line at the counter wasn’t long, despite the busy patronage, and Raf soon returned to their table and evicted his violin case out of the seat across from Magritte. Finding an unused chair from a nearby table, he pulled it up next to him and sat his carrying case on it.

  He reached over the table to hand Magritte the change, and she stared at it blankly for a moment before saying, “–Oh!” with a bit of a start. She turned her palm up to receive it.

Magritte stuffed the money back into the pocket of her duffel bag. “So, Question.” She sat back up and looked to Raf. “You say you’re not a professional, but you sound like...you know…Properly trained, or whatever.”

  “Mmh.” It was a predictable topic, but not one he wanted to stay on. “Or whatever.” He laughed. “Yeah. Parents pushed it onto me a little too hard. I’ve got the training, but playing it is a chore and I kinda hate it.”

  Magritte’s eyes grew wide and rueful and she shrank against the backrest of her chair. “Wait, really?” She covered her face with the sleeves of her sweater and threw her head back with a guilty little groan. “I’m sorry, I made you play so many songs!”

  Raf patted the air in front of him in a placating gesture, “No, no. You didn’t make me do anything, relax.” He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I did that to myself. I meant it, though, when I said it was fun. It was the first time in a long while where I actually enjoyed myself once things got going.”

  Magritte drew in a deep breath, recollecting herself before tentatively asking, “Enough that you’d wanna do it again sometime?”

  A beleaguered laugh escaped him, “No.”   He had given her much of his time and energy already, and being asked for more put a bitter taste in his mouth. The arrival of his iced americano and her hot mocha couldn’t have been better timed. As soon as it was placed in front of him, he brought the drink to his lips and took a long sip. 

  Magritte sheepishly turned her gaze down to admire the little white hearts in the foam of her coffee before she started to drink it. She placed the cup back down but kept both hands curled around it. “Did you enjoy it when you were younger?”

  “Music?” Raf shrugged. “I don’t remember. It doesn’t really matter.” His gaze turned down towards her duffel bag as he grasped for a better topic. “Is your main instrument the piano?”

 “Yeah! It’s what I had access to, growing up.”

  “Who taught you?”

  “Oh, I, uh…mostly just the internet and stuff. My parents didn’t wanna waste money on it, and my highschool didn’t have like…a music class or anything. Just choir. None of my friends played music.”

  “...You learned online?”

  “Well, like…on Myspace and LiveJournal. Lots of people share what they know there, and I made some really good online friends who tried to teach me things. We’d share music with each other and do weekly challenges and stuff. It was fun.”

  “So, self-taught, more or less.”

  “Mostly. Oh, except–!” Magritte ducked down to unzip the main pocket of her duffel bag and dove her hands into it. She rummaged around until she produced a small mp3 player and earbuds attached by a chord. “There was a year when I was living in Montreal, my girlfriend was a jazz pianist. And then we met other, um…friends who taught me more in that one year than I think I ever learned in my entire life. It was her and a whole lotta horns. They all let me use their instruments and taught me proper technique and stuff. I think they liked watching me stubbornly struggle with it. In the end, I was only able to record one song before I had to, um, move on. But I’m still kinda proud of it. I dunno if you wanna–it’s instrumental and kinda eclectic, but I loved making it.”

  In response, Raf extended his hand, and Magritte spent a second scrolling through her library of mp3s before stuffing the little music device and earbuds into his open palm. 

  She performed an excited little wiggle in her seat as Raf wordlessly placed an earbud into his ear. “Just hit play, and it should be the right song.”

  Raf wasn’t sure what he had expected to hear. He was, at least, perfectly comfortable with listening and offering his honest input. He didn’t believe in ‘bad’ music. There was skilled and unskilled music, there was music that fit his tastes and music that really didn’t. But none of it was bad. All music created deserved to be created and allowed to exist–if only for the satisfaction of the musician who produced it. He was prepared to tell her that the best music she could make is the music she enjoyed making, even if it didn’t resonate with his personal tastes.   He pressed ‘play’.

 What hit his ear was an uptempo half-time funk sound carried on a unison horn line; crystal clear, well mixed, high quality audio. Right from the jump, the sound had a quirky, catching character. He fitted the other earbud into his ear as a sustained note leapt into an energetic, off-beat ska groove. His brow furrowed deeply as he tried to discern the instrumentation. The drum fill might have been digital, but the winds sounded far too dynamic to be synthetic. And there were…three of them; the two horns he couldn’t quite specify, and then a baritone sax. The horns took centre stage, confident and playful, supported by a jaunty walking bassline and synthetic, bubbly organ accompaniment. Despite its G minor key signature, the character of the piece was lively and a little goofy, smart but playful; it was simply–fun. A smile lit across his face as the melody modulated G minor into G Phrygian for the bridge section. The effect was a jesting ooh gonna getcha vibe.

  He listened to the end of the song before he began to comment on it. “Very cool. Your jazz friends weren’t sleeping on their music theory classes. I assume the organ is you?”

  Magritte shifted nervously in her seat as her thumb smoothed over the handle of her coffee cup in small, repeated strokes. “I borrowed instruments for this one and recorded it in…um, my girlfriend’s parents' house. They had a music room where I was allowed to record things.”

  “You borrowed–right. But the horns..?”

  “Yeah.”

  Raf levelled a measuring stare at her.

  “I recorded each instrument separately,” she began explaining, “It’s uh, piano, trumpet, trombone, and–oh! The baritone sax was played by Sadie, one of my, um…jazz friends.” She let out a weak laugh. “And then, like…a bass, I also played. And a synthetic drum fill ‘cus…none of us knew how to actually play drums.”

  “You played each instrument? Learned them and recorded this song within the span…of a year?”

  “No, just the trumpet and trombone! I already knew piano and bass.”   Confusion must have been apparent on Raf’s face, and she tried to address it by saying, “It’s all digitally processed, so it sounds a little more–”

  “No, I–I know that.” Raf massaged an eyebrow with one hand. “You’re the songwriter too, I assume?” His tone was a little more sharp than he’d have liked it to be. It betrayed his incredulity.

  Magritte picked up her cup and eyed him nervously over the rim as she sipped from it.

  “No, I don’t know how.” She sounded embarrassed. “I can’t read or write music. I just sketched a bunch of it out digitally first, and then–”

  “Fresh compositions? By ear?”

  “Yeah. And then I recreated it with the correct instrumentation.” She chewed on the nail of her thumb. “It works, I think.”

  “That’s still songwriting. It counts.” Raf sniffed and leaned back in his seat. “I gotta be honest, and don’t take this the wrong way but…it’s a little hard to believe.”

  Magritte’s nervousness dissolved into a flattered grin. “Yeah?”

  Raf’s brow twitched downward as he tried to read past her demeanour. He had expected a more sheepish response, if not a more defensive one. His doubt wasn’t intended as a compliment, but if she were being wholly honest with him, perhaps it made sense that she’d take it as one.

  He drained the last of his americano. “So, you’re not pursuing this professionally, because..?”

  “Oh, I am!” Magritte shrugged and turned her eyes to the upper right corner of the room. “It’s just been kinda…difficult.”

  “Yeah? Why’s that?” It was a stupid question he already knew the answer to. Music was more easy to find nowadays than ever before, but discoverability still relied on knowing how to promote the work and get the right ears onto it. And, across the entire spectrum of skill, this is what everyone tended to blame for the inability to live off their–

  “Money.”

  “M–!” The response was so sudden and matter-of-fact in tone, Raf couldn’t stop a bark of surprised laughter from escaping him. He’d have laughed the same way if someone had just dumped a bucket of ice water over his head.

  Magritte slapped her palms down on the table and leaned forward with wide eyes to state her defence. “Instruments are expensive, lessons are expensive, computers are expensive, software and sound libraries are expensive! Everything’s so expensive!” She slumped back in her seat, turning her palms over in an exasperated gesture. “If I could afford to go to school and actually like–learn music, and if I could afford to rent instruments and recording equipment and stuff, I could make more songs! I could upload like…whole albums! I’ve got all these doodles with my shitty midi libraries and they might sound actually good if I could just record them properly! But it’s been like…four years since I left home, and the only properly produced track I have to show for it is that one.” She flopped her hand towards the mp3 player on the table. “So, I just make my little digital doodles, and I come up with tunes that suit the sounds I have access to. I like it. I’m happy I get to make any music at all, but it’s a bit niche, you know? And I have all these other ideas in my head that need like…better, less…synthetic sounds. There are libraries that sound pretty convincing, but all the best ones are…expensive. And vocals are hard to record with the stuff I’ve got.”

  Raf held up his hands in effort to placate her. “No, I know, you’re right–money. I just–” It wasn’t a struggle he had ever faced, and he couldn’t help but feel like a bit of a heel over the fact that he hadn’t even considered it as an obstacle to the extent that she was describing it.

  “On the other hand,” Magritte’s voice took on a capitulating tone, “With the right skill, I should be able to produce bangers with whatever I’ve got, yeah? And,” she took up her coffee cup in one hand, staring into its contents, “if I was better at saving money, I’d be able to afford those really good sample libraries just fine, probably. I just like my sweet foamy lattes too much.” She sighed a little laugh at herself.

  Raf let out a low groan of disagreement, but didn’t elaborate on it. “I kinda…want to listen to those ‘digital doodles’ you mentioned.” If nothing else, it’d give him an idea of how much input her jazz friends had over the composition of the song he heard. If the obvious compositional prowess flexed in that fun-loving jazzy ska piece were completely absent in her little sketches, he wouldn’t chalk it up to being just a fluke. 

  Drawing in a deep breath and holding it, Margritte reached for the mp3 player and scrolled through its contents before handing it to Raf. “You can just skip through these as you like. It’s all a little–” She wrinkled her nose and let out a grunt in place of any real adjective.

  With an affirming little snort of his own, Raf took the little music player and put the earbuds into his ears once more. He pressed play, and immediately understood what she meant. The synthetic instrumentation was wholly lacking in dynamics, and the musical ideas present in the melodies begged for more colourful phrasing. As he skipped from one song to the next, he grew more frustrated. The compositional writing was good. Consistent with the first song he had heard, Magritte seemed to really love playing with eccentric progressions and modulations that were unconventional for the mood or emotion that the song was attempting to capture. And ever present in each little composition was this boundless sense of joy. But god, the instrumentation (or rather, the lack thereof) really, really held it all back.

  As he listened, his lips pressed into a thin line. Finally, with a low groan that betrayed his thoughts, he took out the earbuds and handed the music player back. “Yeah, that sucks.” The end of that statement stuck in his throat as he sputtered to clarify, “Not the music–”

  “Yes, the music.” Magritte’s giggle was one of genuine affirmation as she tucked the mp3 player away into her duffle bag.

  “No,” Raf argued, “your toolset. There’s a lot of skill here, but the cheap synthy sounds aren’t doing it any favours. You went absolutely ham on those horns in the first song, and I don’t hear any of that in these sketches because it’s just not possible. There’s a lot of energy that is just…missing. Even watching you play at the station, yeah your keyboard suffers the same limitations, but at least in person I noticed you’ll even make use of like…the percussion of your fingers hitting the keys, which, you know…is dynamic.”

  As he spoke, Magritte retained a smile and provided small nods before asking, “You like it, then?”

  Raf leaned back, folded his arms and chewed on the question for a second before replying, “Yeah. I do. A lot.” 

  A lot.

  There was a corner of his mind that begged him to get back home to his apartment and try out the melodies with an instrument that could do it proper justice.  Jesus Christ, this actually makes me want to play the violin.

  The realisation made his lip curl with a feeling in his gut that he couldn’t quite identify. “You know…”

  Magritte, taking the last remaining sips of her latte, turned her eyes up at him with a little “Hm?”

  There was a pause while Raf wrestled with himself. “I, uh…work at a recording studio not too far from here. Just down on uh…Powell Street.”   He felt his jaw clench. There was no good reason for him to tell strangers about where he worked. There was no possible good outcome in doing so. Mentioning it felt too much like an open invitation for her to pop in at any time, for no good reason at all except to make things uncomfortable.   “It’s called Hi-Note, and it’s got like…a pretty standard assortment of instruments to rent out and such. It closes early.” He wasn’t looking at her. Brow furrowed, he stared at the ice melting in his otherwise empty glass. “Swing by tomorrow night, after eight, and maybe we can jam for like..half an hour or something before I head home.”

  He didn’t glance up to see her expression, but her voice was slow to rise to his ears. “..Wait, really?”

  No. “Yeah.” What the fuck? “Really.”   Unable to unfurrow his brow, he managed to at least turn his gaze towards her. Her eyes were so large on that petite face of hers, and her lips parted slightly, muscles tense with the anticipation of some kind of catch or condition. Or, perhaps she had picked up on his apprehension and was waiting for him to revoke the offer. For some reason, the idea of doing so suddenly felt…unconscionable to him.

  In a small voice, she said, “I’d really like that.” The restraint of her response was belied by the way she wiggled in her chair. Beneath the table, her leg wagged restlessly like an excited dog’s tail. “Eight o’clock?”

 “Mmhm.” Raf felt some of the tension in his browline relax as a slight smile passed his lips. “Let's see if we can revisit some of those tunes you have. Just–for fun. No recording, nothing serious.”

  It seemed that Magritte could never keep a smile off her face for long, and once again, that broad, delighted grin of hers painted her features. “Yeah, yeah! I’d like that a lot!”

  “Alright then.” Raf knocked his knuckles twice on the table like a gavel, before standing up.

  As he reached to retrieve his violin case off the chair next to him, Magritte pressed her fingertips to her temples. “Hi-Note, eight o’clock.”

  Raf favoured her with a lopsided smirk. “Don’t forget.”

  “I won’t. I’ll see you there!”

  He provided her with an affirmative little wave, but by the time she had realised he was taking his leave, Raf was already halfway to the door.

  He heard her call out to him, “Thank you for the–um–everything!” 

  Looking back to her, Raf returned the sentiment with an appreciative nod before pushing through the cafe doors; exiting onto the busy sidewalk outside.

  He wanted to get home before sundown…

  To play his violin.

[nondelphic]

thank you so much for 700 followers!! this is so insane to me and i'm so happy people are enjoying my posts.

i know most of you are here for my ""relatable writing posts"" but i also know some of you are interested in who i am, and specifically my writing, so to celebrate hitting 700 followers i thought i'd give you a taste of my writing !! i know i was supposed to tag some ppl but i forgot to write your names down and i can't remember who wanted to be tagged and who didn't 😭😭😭

these are all drafts and i def don't consider myself a great writer, but i think i'm okay at storytelling. regardless, enjoy it for what it is!

this excerpt is from my first completed draft of "the midnight chase." for context, marley is aroace.

-

They sat in silence for a while before Marley shifted towards Lucas. She bit her lip, uncertain of how honest to be. “Lucas?”

He looked at her. “Yeah?”

“You know the party last month? Remember how Elvis kissed me?”

Lucas nodded. Marley averted her gaze, focusing on a path beyond the pond that led to a cliff overlooking the ocean.

“Do you think it’s possible to want that sort of closeness, without wanting it all?” Marley could feel Lucas gaze on her.

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”

Marley sighed and let her gaze drop to her feet. Her shoelaces had come undone.

“I mean, I don’t like Elvis like that, but when he kissed me, I felt… warm inside. Like, it’s not something I crave, but it felt nice regardless.”

Lucas remained silent for a moment. Marley looked up to see his gaze thoughtful as he processed her words. The gentle rustling of leaves and the occasional chirp of a bird were the only sounds filling the silence between them. Marley could feel her heartbeat quicken, wondering if she had said too much, or if Lucas might misunderstand her.

Finally, Lucas sighed softly, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I get what you’re saying, Marley. I think… it’s natural to want closeness, to feel connected to someone, even if it’s not necessarily about romance. It’s human, you know? We all crave that warmth, that feeling of being wanted or cared for, even if it’s just for a moment.”

Marley nodded, relieved that he understood, but still, there was something else she needed to express. She glanced between Lucas and her shoelaces, her senses searching for any sign of judgement or discomfort, but all she saw was patience and a gentle curiosity.

“I guess it just made me question something that’s been nagging me for a long time,” Marley continued, her voice softer now, almost hesitant. “Like, what if I don’t ever want that kind of connection with someone, but I still want to feel close to people? Is that okay?”

Lucas’s expression softened even more, and he reached out, gently placing a hand on Marley’s shoulder. “Marley, there’s no right or wrong way to feel about these things. You’re allowed to want whatever it is you want—or don’t want. It doesn’t make you any less valid or any less… you.”

Marley let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, the tension in her shoulders easing slightly. “Thanks, Lucas. I guess I just needed to hear that.”

and here's another excerpt that shows a bit more of the story...... kinda.

-

As Lucas excused himself to go to the bathroom, Marley looked for Chio. Instead, she ran into Silas.

“Hey,” he said, holding his arm out. “Let’s dance.”

Initially, Marley wanted to say no, but something in Silas’ expression made her do the opposite. She took his arm and he led her to a more secluded part of the dance floor. Marley noticed people staring at them as they walked, not unsurprisingly, considering her and Silas' history.

Silas put a cautious hand on Marley’s back as the song transitioned to a sentimental and slow piano arrangement. 

“You know the map I gave you?” Silas asked. Marley smiled. Yes, the one she and her friends had managed to figure out completely. “Did you solve it?” 

Something in Silas’ expression told Marley he already knew the answer. Did he want help? Had he solved it?

“Yes,” Marley said. Silas nodded, and a smile crept up on his face.

“Me too. Which means… the winner will be determined by who gets to the middle first.”

Marley nodded. “You’re doing it alone?” 

“Yes. I work best alone. I know you’re doing it with your friends.” Something in Marley churned at his answer. It was a typical Silas answer, a simple phrase etched with an edge of passive aggressiveness. Marley had solved it with the help of her friends. He had solved it alone, using only his brains.

“Teamwork is an underappreciated tool,” Marley said, finding herself distancing herself slightly from Silas’ hold on her as they danced.

“Of course. It’s important to be able to work with others. At the end of the day, though, you'll be alone.”

Marley looked into Silas’s eyes, trying to decipher his expression. There was something behind his words, a hint of loneliness perhaps, or maybe a sense of inevitability. She decided to keep the conversation light, not wanting to spoil the mood of the evening.

“Maybe so, but having friends by your side can make a huge difference,” Marley replied, her tone gentle but firm.

Silas nodded, his gaze thoughtful. “I suppose you’re right. It’s just... sometimes it feels like relying on others is a weakness.”

Marley shook her head. “It’s not a weakness, Silas. It’s a strength. Knowing when to ask for help, and knowing you can trust those around you, that’s powerful.”

They continued to dance in silence for a few moments, the slow melody wrapping around them. Marley felt a strange mix of empathy and rivalry towards Silas. She understood his drive and his determination, but she also saw the value in the support system she had with her friends.

As the song came to an end, Silas offered her a small smile. “Thank you for the dance, Marley. And for the perspective.”

Marley returned the smile. “Anytime, Silas. Good luck with the challenge.”

“Good luck to you too,” Silas replied, giving her a polite nod before walking away.

Marley watched him go, feeling a mixture of emotions. She was grateful for her friends and the support they provided, but she also understood the weight Silas carried. She hoped that one day he would realize the value of camaraderie.

Lucas returned from the bathroom, a curious look on his face. “Did I miss something?”

Marley laughed, shaking off the remnants of her conversation with Silas. “Just a dance with Silas. Nothing major.”

Lucas raised an eyebrow but didn’t press further. “Shall we continue dancing?”

“Absolutely,” Marley said, feeling lighter and more determined than ever.

They returned to the dance floor, joining their friends in the celebration. The rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, dancing, and shared moments that Marley knew she would treasure for a long time.

As the night wound down, Marley found herself sitting with Chio and Maya on a bench outside the hall, the cool air in the stone-cladden corridor a refreshing contrast to the warmth of the dance floor.

Maya pulled out her phone from under her dress. Marley watched her. “Where did you keep that?”

“Oh, I have all my dressed sewn to include hidden pockets. I hate not being able to carry stuff.”

Chio rolled her eyes dramatically. “Ah, yes, custom sewn gowns with pockets, what a normal and humble thing!”

“It’s not my fault that default dresses don’t come with pockets already,” Maya countered.

“Calling normal dresses ‘default dresses’ is crazy,” Marley snorted. She looked at Chio’s dress. It was a beautifully simple dress with long, wide arms and a simple fabric belt around the waist, in a bright orange colour, contrasting Chio’s blue hair in a seamlessly effortless way.

“To be fair, my dress is also customised,” Chio sighed, smoothing out her skirt, before smirking. “I took it in two centimetres at the waist.”

The three girls burst out into laughter. Maya looked at her phone.

“What time is it?” Chio asked.

“10:45.”

“We should get ready.” Marley said. The Midnight Chase started at midnight, just as the name suggested. And she was not running down the maze in a long dress. Well, she could, she knew multiple people participating who were going directly from the dance to the maze. But they weren’t in it to win it. Marley and her friends were.

Hopefully, Silas would find that working alone is actually the greatest weakness.

Marley had a gnawing feeling that her stance would be proven right.

HELP i'm so scared y'all are gonna think my writing is trash because LET'S BE FR THIS IS JUST FROM MY FIRST DRAFT!!!! i haven't yet edited these scenes so they're kinda cringe but i wanted to show my main project. i do have different writing styles depending on genre though, and i'm tempted to show some of my comedy writing. it's pretty hilarious, if i may say so myself.

anyway, thank you again for 700 followers. thank you so much. each like, reblog, reply, message, or ask brings me so much happiness. you have no clue how much your interest warms my heart (or maybe you do because you know how social media manipulates our brains and their reward system)

[onewomancitadel]

Major spoilers for Death's End, the final book of the Remembrance of Earth's Past trilogy beneath the cut.

So about that terrarium...

My intial somewhat dismayed reading was that of an uncharacteristic, hackneyed sentimentality: even when the books took such an indulgence, there was always a cynical chaser. You don't get to experience the fantastical sense of romantic love without Luo Ji's understanding of women (or lack thereof) and the belief that people only love imaginations of each other and stay together so long as they don't conflict with reality. (This is probably key to the fact that the star-crossed lovers never meet in Death's End, neither of them being disabused of their fantasies. It's juvenile).

Suffice it to say, I really struggled with the ending. I struggled with Death's End in general; not necessarily the fundamental approach (I don't think undoing the victory was a totally bad idea, since I liked evolving that thesis past what it means to win) but the structure felt less whimsical and more directionless, a series of entries - quite literally - which felt disparate and never quite managed to hit that sense of dispassionate historical observation I think the text was trying to go for.

So the idea that there was this terrarium and message in a bottle left behind in a universe built specially for Cheng Xin was just kind of bizarre tonally. It felt silly.

I get it: the entries about Earth's past is right there in the trilogy title. But it felt very self-important; it didn't cohere with the overwhelming notion that humanity was 1. very irrelevant, 2. very bad at what it does, 2a. its women are very bad at what they do, and its men - if soft and weak - are similarly bad, 3. at every moment anything that isn't about pure survival is cut at the knees. Remembrance seems more like farce. Actually, the entire sequence on Pluto felt out of place, almost like we're meant to laugh at the little bugs trying to save their precious granules of sugar.

I was discussing the ending with my best friend and her family - actually I related all the events of the books to them, somewhat out of chronological order, because I know that they all collectively would fucking hate these books (I personally didn't, glimmers of brilliance make me all the more frustrated) - and she said this amazing thing which was like, well, you say there's all this umming and ahhing over whether the universe might not be able to reboot if there's mass left behind - and it seems alright just to leave something - what if this is Cheng Xin's final fuck-up, finally chosen in an active way?

It's actually her seeming passivity which would allow this final stunt at all. Nobody would dare assume - not her last companions - that she would intentionally do this at all. So far she's damned humanity once, and then effectively twice (at least I think she is implicitly damned), and she is, really sincerely, a complete fuck-up wastrel who never does or thinks anything interesting. Luo Ji gets to be a fuck-up wastrel who thinks interesting things and does interesting things, and fails once, twice, three times, probably more, as a Wallfacer, and has a moment of stunning success because he's a fuck-up wastrel. This is a great idea, which unfortunately suffers in the face of the fact that Liu Cixin is obsessed with strong men.

The idea that Cheng Xin looks at the face of the overwhelming loneliness of her universe, the cruelty and inhumanity of the dark forest thesis, the wars upon wars which ravaged multiple dimensions until they were folded into flatness, and then decides to weaponise a sense of sentimentality to finally damn that universe - to prevent it from being reborn, to escape samsara - when she would never be expected to be capable of such a thing, to finally actively choose this maternality she's passively carried and passively condemned humanity with - is maybe the thing which could redeem that ending for me. It's bleak - and I still don't agree with the overall attitude the books hold - but it is actually a real thesis! It does actually deliver on this threat that's expounded upon and seems like, in any other story, would surely allow for some small space to remember humanity. But how much mass is enough? If enough pocket unvierses all leave behind a few hundred grams, surely it would start to add up.

The alternative interpretation is that Cheng Xin once again fucks everything up but not on purpose, merely through an innocent-intentioned sentimentality. But I think the fact that she acknowledges the threat allows a bit of wiggle room. The argument here would be that Luo Ji's final Wallfacer plan against the Trisolarans is concealed from us until its reveal; this move has been pulled once before. The key difference is that we never see whether the universe reboots. I think this is very meaningful for the argument that it doesn't, and that we wouldn't see the payoff of Cheng Xin's plan, because there is no universe anymore. This really makes it a true twist ending to me which - most meaningfully of all - doesn't go against what the books were trying to do, but actually strengthens it.

But she put the effort into recording humanity's history, and I might go so far as to argue that she did that to explain her motivation to end it all, instead of slipping into it, but actually thinking about it.

The real conflict here, actually with any ending, is the sense of anthropocentrism which it otherwise sought to subvert. But I think reading against that, if we take it seriously that human beings are moral creatures who make moral judgements irrespective of our place in the universe (however small that is), I think that actually pairs better thematically with the idea that a graveyard remembrance of humanity also serves as the final, very small thing - this small living thing - which says 'no more'. The sense of reincarnation and enlightenment here, too, feels fitting, though I'd argue that its overly cynical view of the universe does the argument better.

I wrote all this out and then I went back to reread the last few pages. (I'm using an ebook version, so I don't have page citations). I'm going to see if this interpretation actually holds:

Cheng Xin asks if she can leave five kilograms behind, and then:

As long as the tiny sun inside the sphere continued to give off light, this miniature ecological system would persist. As long as it remained here, Universe 647 would not be a lifeless, dark world. “Of course,” said Guan Yifan. “The great universe isn’t going to fail to collapse because it misses five kilograms.” He had another thought that he did not voice: Perhaps the great universe really would fail to collapse because it lacked a single atom’s mass. [...] Ultimately, the great universe was certain to lose at least a few hundred million tons of matter, or perhaps even a million billion billion tons. Hopefully, the great universe could ignore such a loss.

So the sequence of events is this:

they're going to heed the call of the Returners

Cheng Xin wants to leave behind something to remember humanity by

Guan Yifan says of course she can, so graciously giving her permission

they acknowledge the general fact that others may do the same thing, or maybe even a single atom might be enough to prevent the universe rebooting, so it's a gamble anyway

Holy fuck this is terrible. Anyway, if we go through this with the perspective of the books - that every civilisation is interested first and foremost in survival at any cost, and short of that, to be remembered (survival in memory) - it is near-inevitable that there will be other mass left behind. But the flipside of this is that each individual choice matters; maybe with enough choosing to forego that, the universe could reboot. It's not definite. The ending is left open, the 'science' here is left imprecise. But we are reading between the lines of motivation. I'm not sure that my reading holds as an intended reading - because I do think the thematic compromise of the ending really does feel quite clear - but this is how I would make it more concordant with the series.

I much prefer it for the fact that Cheng Xin uses her contemplation in this lonely, ugly pocket universe to come to a conclusion of leaving mass behind to damn the universe. It would give her something to do. It would improve it tonally - haha, just rereading it, my God, I can't believe this is the ending to these books - and I think I like it just because it subverts that patronising treatment Guan Yifan affords her, like a little child asking for a lolly, concealing the truth of the potential cruelty of nature... which she is actually very well aware of.

I don’t know how much those catastrophes and the final destruction of the Solar System had to do with me. Those are questions that could never be answered definitively. But I’m certain they had something to do with me, with my responsibilities. And now, I’ve climbed to the apex of responsibility: I am responsible for the fate of the universe.

I would like Cheng Xin to abuse the trust in her sweet passivity. This would parallel neatly with Luo Ji's defense against the Trisolarans, the deception within deception within deception, against the ultimate enemy, suffocating it in the cradle.

[kushanna]

Excited to hear your full thoughts on episode 8. Discussing it is a bit confusing due to the fan reception, with the initial reaction being people being mad about stupid shit like the goats or the answers to the mystery not being told explicitly (which is?? Episode 7 is right there??), then the reaction to that reaction was people basically saying that the first group just didn't understand it (harkening back the the who "without love it cannot be seen" idea), and now we have a newer wave of fans who are like "wait, but there is actual issues with episode 8 (umineko in general but especially episode 8), can we discuss those?"

So yeah, it's weird

i'm still processing ep. 8, but i definitely belong to that last group lmao.

disclaimer, i will mostly be complaining under the cut, so if anyone who comes across this is someone who enjoys ep. 8 or is tired of my complaining, maybe don't read it? cause why make yourself upset? i'm saying this cause i have 0 intention of arguing over a mild difference of opinion, peace and love on planet earth.

i think my main problem with it is something i said a couple of times here, that i think ep. 8 works on extremes instead of finding a conclusion that's actually nuanced. personally, i'll always prefer a hard truth to a comfortable lie (always keep this in mind), and i'm not talking about ange here, about what's best for ange, cause it's been shown pretty solidly that the hard truth would be the worst thing to her. but the possible outcomes the story presents are all extreme. the story quite literally ends with her reopening and remodeling fukuin house after the rokkenjima mansion (lol), with a brand new beatrice portrait in place (lol). as if this is a good thing? as if the woman depicted in that portrait hadn't been forced to live her short life without an identity for herself, in distress, as if that portrait isn't a symbol of suffering of more than one generation, all because of the whims of the local terrible man and the accomplices who went along with it? as if it makes any of it better? "it's [insert some sentimental reason for the new portrait to exist]", i don't like it ❤️ it's a symbol of more than that, but i'm not finding the correct words right now. in any case, i don't think it's a good, positive symbol and i can't help seeing beatrice's existence, be it kuwadorian or sayo's, as something that came to be with suffering, because of suffering. the whole remodeling fukuin house situation is kinda distasteful to me (does ange need to build a new rokkenjima if she's moved on?). i do enjoy ange becoming a writer and using that to process her trauma and tragedy, but none of the presented outcomes for her are satisfying to me.

greatly dislike the halloween party. i'm going to talk mostly about eva and kinzo cause eva is closely related to ange and kinzo is a detestable man, but everything i say goes for the whole narrative of the ushiromiyas as a Family™ (hate that). anyway, i really can't accept anything where kinzo, a man who sexually abused and gaslighted (hate how overused this word is, but that's essentially what he did) his daughter, which is something the story discusses very briefly and justifies it with the 💫 great love 💫 in his heart, a man who was at one point described by one of his daughters as a "symbol of terror"... i really can't accept him being presented as anything other than what he is. we gotta draw the line somewhere. "but we know nothing for certain, he might have been a loving father/grandfather" alright, but i don't personally endorse this ❤️

even if you believe that eva intended to be a good parental figure to ange when she first adopted her and that her choices were made thinking of what was best for ange, she never came even close to succeeding in being good to her and those choices backfired in other ways. and i say this not putting any moral judgment on eva's choice of not telling her the truth, cause life sucks and shit's hard, and understanding that eva herself was pretty much deteriorating under her own trauma and grief. really don't know what else to say regarding this, i think i exhausted most of my words at this point, but, just to be clear, i don't think eva loved ange, i think love is a very strong word to use even considering her well-meaning choices. and i don't think she needed to love ange to have been a better person for her? and to not have abused her? eva didn't need to love her, she just needed to do the right thing, those two factors don't necessarily have to be correlated for me. just like i don't think ange needed to see/call eva a mother (at one point in ep. 4 while ange was in rokkenjima she was saying something along the lines of "aunt eva was lashing out at me cause she was in a lot of pain and had no release for it. i still hate her" and honestly? that was better than what ep. 8 tried to do, ange went from "that bitch killed everyone and i'm going to prove it" at the beginning of 4 to "my aunt lost her whole family and could never cope with it" towards the end, it really did seem to me like the beginning of her coming to terms with what had happened between them now that eva was dead and couldn't hurt her anymore, and coming to terms with it in a way that might have allowed her to move forward without completely changing the way she felt about eva all of a sudden, without changing the way eva's actions affected her, and without all that whitewashing sentimentality of ep. 8. but i digress). i also don't think it's necessary to have eva painted as a mother to ange, who was "always on her side", for us to have sympathy for her. let eva beatrice be funny. and if someone doesn't have sympathy for eva and hates her guts, i doubt the over sentimentality will do much to change their feelings. but i digress again. turns out i had not exhausted my words lmao i'm so fucking upset.

"but it's just about ange and what she personally needs" and i'm glad it works for other people ❤️ the narrative does agree with it, though, and like, fine, that's a choice? but again, extremes, and there's a whole world of possibilities between the trick ending and the magic ending. i don't disagree with the overral message of "there's no point in digging something that's quite literally dead and buried cause no good will come of it, try to live your life from now on" and with trying to look back at her family fondly cause doing the opposite will do her no good. but a whole world of possibilities between being resentful or hateful or whatever of people who are dead, prying into their miserable lives to find something you want, not being able to move on from tragedy and trauma that's consuming you and... having to do a complete 180° and overwrite people's terrible actions as the only way to find closure. or something. other ways of coming to terms with what you've gone through, with where you came from and with what other people might have supposedly done. you can tell the story loves ange, but i feel like it loves her in this sort of infantilizing way. it also continuously puts blame on her when she's completely free of guilt. it boils down to me being frustrated with the writing, so in-story justifications do nothing for me.

there's another thing, and i'm probably going to make a post talking about it more extensively at some point, but there's a huge shift for me... like, thematically or something, between eps. 1 – 5 and 6 – 8 in terms of some characters and elements in the story. it might put people off, it put me off a little. beato and battler's game on the questions arc had a very clear basis of "prove to me that humans can do it, that magic is not needed" and then when you jump to the end of the answers arc it's almost like the narrative is saying "oh, you don't believe in magic? you think it's a trick? how sad for you" lol excuse me? that's how it felt with the magic vs. trick endings, like, yeah, it was giving me a choice, but one of those was clearly being presented as the "superior" one. also something similar with the red truths? in my experience it went from "red truths are absolute" to "find the gaps in the red truths" in the questions arc, which is fair, but when it came to the end of the answers arc... bernkastel was using red truths and i was barely taking them into consideration cause it seemed mostly meaningless to me. from the moment she said the "this is all truth–" on the ep. 7 tea party, i knew it would mean nothing. huge shift.

there were many things i liked in ep. 8, i made a sort of list some days ago, but the overarching ange narrative really did almost nothing for me. i'm willing to blame myself and say that yeah, i completely misunderstood all the inherent elements of the story ❤️ on a last note, i personally like to have a clearer resolution to the mystery, but i did most of my reading thinking we wouldn't have a clear resolution and i was completely fine with that as well. i also understand people who would have preferred not to have a resolution. what i'm saying is i'm very satisfied with the mystery itself and the layers of nebulousness we ended up with are perfectly alright by me.

[help-is-on-the-way]

Ive finally reread the Lemonade Mouth book and i have feelings. This may be long.

Ive watched the movie countless times since i was like 12, it has always been one of my favorite disney movies. I had their songs in my mp3 and at school i liked carrying my house keys around so i could pretend i was Wen in Turn Up The Music. Anyway. Ive always known it was a story adapted from a book. I remember buying it when i was like 16 after watching the movie for the bajillionth time. I never finished it. I remember the different POVs threw me off a bit and the language didnt make it any easier (english isnt my first language and the book has never been translated). My bookmarker said i made it to page 152. But i honestly did Not remember at all like 90% of the changes. So im like pretty sure i read it without Actually reading.

Anyway. Now im 24 and i rewatched the movie 3 nights in a row this week. And im way more well versed in english nowadays. So i decided to give the book another shot. Now, like i said, i have feelings. I read the whole thing in 2 nights. Im not sure what im doing right now and im sure im overexplaining things, as i usually do. But well. I think i wanna say some stuff.

First of all, after reading the book i can confidently say the movie is a pretty amazing adaptation. Ive always known that, but like, now i have undisputable proof. The way they made the story flow in just under 2 hours always baffled me. They got like 7 character stories going on and it never feels too much. And the changes from the book are mostly all understandable, and some of them i even like way better in the movie in my opinion. I mean. Except their appearances changes. I love Bridget Mendler as much as the next guy, but .. Fat Olivia wouldve been so cool to see. Especially considering the movie/book themes.

I remember whenever i rewatched the movie as a 18 year old and onwards, i always thought something along the lines of. Wow. For a movie all about revolution, and being a freak, and not conforming to the social mold, and being a minority in an elitist society - the lack of queer related stuff is so Loud. I guess it always disappointed me. Not that we are necessarily freaks, but well. Im sure we all felt like it at some point. I remember being angry about it, then. But i get it. Of course i always did, in a way. It was 2011 and it was disney. And im not stupid either. Stella is a glaringly obvious lgbt subtext allegory - maybe its the Hayley Kyoko in her, but they all knew what they were doing, i think. I can see that. Its subtext. I just cant help it but feel a bit disappointed that it isnt text too. I kinda always secretly hoped the book had something more in this subject. Dont get me wrong. Stella's character in the book manages to be even more marvellous than in the movie (an impressive feat). I was in shock that she was written explicitly and diagnosed with dyslexia and ADHD. Being a different but similar kind of neurodivergent myself, that was really cool and genuinely surprised me, as ive always related to the feeling dumb sentiments she has. But, you know. Still kinda made me sad. You could make the argument that she didnt need a romantic arc or whatever, cause she was going through a lot, blablabla. And, yeah. I agree with you. She was going through a lot. Thats kinda the point though. All five of them were. Its the whole point of their characters. Theyre all going through their own personal stuff and they got school problems on top of it - the band and their music is an answer to all of it. Im not saying she needed a girlfriend or anything. She didnt, and her character is one of the most fleshed out ones. I just cant help but wish.

Which then brings me to my next point. Honestly. I feel like the book had a lot more romance going on than the movie. In parts it was really sweet, and in others kind of annoying. The movie always made it very clear that Mo and Charlie wouldnt be a thing, and i come from that reality and mentality. So imagine my surprise when they are actually a thing by the end of the book. Idk. Ive always disliked Scott, and hated that he got in the band and played with them at the Madison Square Garden by the end. He never felt like one of the band, he never felt like a lemonade mouth. I dont think he ever really understood their struggles as freaks. At least not in my eyes. So he always felt a bit undeserving of his spot. He's there because of Mo, for Mo and Mo only. He's even more of an asshole in the book, so im glad hes not really brought up again after he tries to apologize and Mo says she isnt interested. I really like that this is what happens in the book. I might be too much of a Scott hater, but, yeah. I do like it. I dont think Mo shouldve gotten with Scott in the movie either. But i also dont think she shouldve gotten with Charlie, is the point. Sure, Charlie's character in the book actually puts in the effort to get to know Mo, he is sweet, he makes her feel listened to, and he tries to learn about her heritage and culture. He does not feel like hes in love with the idea of Mo (aside the first few POVs of him) (he quickly grows from that when they become proper friends). He loves her for her. And thats something i dont feel like it happens with movie-Charlie.

In fact, im gonna go in a bit of tangent here, i feel like movie-Charlie is the most not-book character of them all. Hes got the most background change, and most of the time he isnt seem doing much (most of his scenes were passed on to Wen - going with Stella to ask about the lemonade machine, being the one that's approached by Lyle when he sells the Lemonade Mouth Live at the Bash CDs, etc). When theyre deciding if they should become a band or not at the pizzaria, his coin flip in the book matters because thats heavily tied to his way of seeing the world and the universe. Tied to his belief that hes the wrong brother to have survived, so Aaron (heads) also deserves a chance to choose his actions for him, just as much as Charlie himself (tails) does. And thats explored time and time again over the pages. Its incredibly interesting and original. When they get rid of his dead twin brother, and build up a living-in-the-shadow-of-a-perfect-older-brother backstory for him, the coin flip just seems like hes an undecisive guy, who doesnt have a good reason to say No, but also not to say Yes either. And while thats fine, i guess... it just doesnt hold the same value narratively speaking. It just feels more shallow, like hes simply a more laid back guy - and although that is consistent, it just couldve been so much more. I do like movie-Charlie, but book-Charlie is way more interesting. His book appearance is more fitting too. Hes described as a regular chubby guy with unruly hair. I like that.

Anyway, back to the romance thing. Its fine i guess. Im mostly against Mo x Charlie in the book because it just kinda feels weird after watching the movie for 12 years. I liked the "friendzone" arc. Its nice when a boy and a girl can just be friends in media, no ulterior motives behind it (though that doesnt really happen between them either) (we see that more with Stella and the boys). Also because idk im not a huge fan of how Mo eventually came around and confessed to Charlie in the book. I know that theyre 14 but Charlie was still hurt by what she had said, and though she did apologize and admited that she screwed up, i feel like i wouldve liked it more if she explained to him what was going on through her head better. Like if she had explained to him what she had explained to the reader, that she was too preoccupied desesperately chasing after a future that doesnt belong to her, it kinda wouldve made it a lot better for me. Cause Charlie said multiple times that he was confused by the whole thing, and still hurt, but they kinda ignored that and kissed twice. And that was it, they were dating now. But then again, if they were able to express themselves that well, they wouldnt be 14 year olds.

And then on the other side of the romantic things going on theres Wen and Olivia. Ive always liked them as a couple since i was a kid. And their moments in the book were pretty fucking good. I love the subtle ways in which Wen slowly begins to pay more attention to her, and notice how his feelings toward her change, even though he doesnt really understand what they are. I lost my mind when in the beginning he described her eyes as a simple brown, but the next time it happens he sees that it has hints of yellow as well. And their fight scene ?!?!??!! Bro !!! The peak-ism of it all..... the way Wen crosses the street without Olivia, and theyre shouting while on different opposing sidewalks, with cars going between them, a clear and visual indication of this rift they suddenly found themselves in, and how sometimes they can think in opposite ways. Its so good. Hurts so well. And it gives more of a reason for Olivia to lose her voice as well, cause she had to yell over the noise and stuff. While in the movie she lost her voice over yelling two sentences while they were 2 meters away from each other, which always striked me as odd.

Speaking of which i feel like i have so much to say about Olivia, and at the same time so little. I honestly dont know which i prefer better, movie-Olivia or book-Olivia. From a poetic and creative standpoint, i really like that Olivia's POV throughout the book is told solely through her letters to her dad (+ Naomi at the end). Its very charming. But at the same time it also kinda feels like it hurts her characterization a bit in places. She tells stuff through a letter format to her dad, so at times it feels like she is withholding stuff while at the same time saying Much More than a 14 year old would say to their dad. And, granted, that does say a lot about her as a character, but you know. The point of different POVs is to explore the characters more. But because shes stuck telling the events to her dad, i dont feel like shes explored enough, it almost feels like shes only allowed to be his daughter - and it also feels forced at times when she tells stuff to him that i know just needs to be said for plot reasons. Which is a bit sad. I have the feeling that it is intentional, but idk. I feel like after 336 pages i still barely know her. We mostly get to know about her through other people - we basically only see Olivia [daughter] and Olivia [quiet friend]. I wanna see Olivia, dammit!!! It kinda sucks cause i love her and the book did not answer the questions i had about her. Shes the main singer, for goodness' sake !!!! And in the book nobody else sings besides her too.

This paragraph from one of Mo's POV kinda sums it all. Im stuck in a fence trying to understand if thats a good thing or not, when shes still a mystery even to the reader, only a 100 pages away from the end of the book. I want to know whats going on in her head so badly.

The exerpt kinda brings me to another point, slightly connected to the romance thing. The girls barely interact with each other. Of course we know they all become friends, and by the time the Halloween Bash is over and Nancy dies, Wen is already describing them all as a family in his POV. So we know they are all closer than they were before. From this point on they always describe themselves as friends, when before there was always an uncertainty over their relationship. But like, getting to my original point. The girls' interaction is scarce. Mo and Stella have the fight scene in the beginning, when the band first tried to make things work and they butted heads during practice. And then they get a descriptive paragraph soon after of the two of them having fun while reading a magazine and coloring the pictures with a pen after practice. After that, all of Mo's scenes are with Charlie, Naomi, or the other 4 as a band (or her dad). At the end Wen mentions that Mo gives him the "shovel talk" so he doesnt hurt Olivia by dating her. But we never get to see Mo and Olivia properly interacting one on one. The shovel talk isnt effective if i dont know the lengths that Mo would go for Olivia. I guess its fine narratively speaking, but like. I wanna see, you know. Olivia's scenes are even worse, theyre all either with Wen or the whole band. Olivia has more scenes with Sydney than with the other girls in her band. And its not just the girls, Wen and Charlie also never interact with each other. I feel like the focus in romance is greatly to blame for this. The movie lacks on this too, dont get me wrong. But its easier to convey their closeness to each other when there's a visual representation of them happening in front of my eyes and i can See them all interacting in between themselves without dialogue. Like Wen and Charlie singing the jingle of Rising Star together when they were in detention, or later on the two of them walking around school together. Or Mo hugging Olivia and standing close to her after Nancy died and More Than a Band happens. The whole More Than a Band scene actually, cause it kinda becomes a "silent" montage of them having fun together. Or having Wen with Stella when she realizes the actions of her consequences and suddenly the whole school knows shes the one responsible for cutting Mudslide Crush's set for the Bash in half. You know what i mean ?? As a big fan of found family i just kinda wish there was more of the rest of the relationships between the 5 of them. And in the book thats especially jarring. Which kinda goes back into the thing i said about Olivia's POV.

She wont write about these details to her dad. The only time she wrote in detail about a conversation was when she fought with Wen, cause she was venting about it to her dad. So we're kinda missing out on a POV that Could help bridge the band together in a way for the reader to see more clearly. Cause its obvious they love each other and theyre family, but we dont get to see much How exactly that happens. The cloud watching scene is like the main bonding moment in between the group and practically the only one we get to participate in. And it's not from Olivia's POV, it never is. Her cat died and we're told what happens through Wen's eyes. She has a "nervous attack" before the Halloween Bash to the point of puking and we're told what happens through Random Girl #6 That Just So Happens to Be Hiding and Eavesdropping in The Next Stall Over. She takes the band to see her dad in prison (a pretty big deal to everyone envolved) and, again, we're told through Wen's eyes. I wanna know what she was thinking !!!!! Cause its obvious it was hard for her to do that, and she had to prepare herself before even telling them where exactly they were going. What was going on through her head, then ?? Was she scared ?? Was she nervous ?? Was she thinking that maybe they wouldnt be her friends anymore because of it ????? We will never know, i can only assume stuff !!!!!!! And its really kinda frustrating. I wanna know for sure.

In the movie, Olivia's mom died when she was really young (young enough to not remember her face), and her dad "made bad decisions because of it". The way she talks about it makes it seem that immediately after her mom died, her father got into trouble with the law. So like her dad has been gone idk 12 years or something. She doesn't know him, doesn't know her mom. We're never told what exactly he did, and i kinda always got the impression that it was something bad, something that Olivia kinda resented him by, at least a little bit. I know she simply stated that she never wrote him back cause she didnt know what to say to him, cause he was basically a stranger to her. But you know. I feel thats enough to resent somebody, cause maybe she doesnt even know what he did either. If something like this happened in my family, i probably wouldnt know either. Not until i was like 22 and my aunt spilled the story while drunk during Christmas. The point is: its not the type of thing you tell a child - it's the type of thing the child quietly accepts as just a part of their normal life. So, at the end, she decides to give him a chance by writing a letter to him. I quite like that cause she was kinda doing the same thing that she fought Wen about. He never gave Sydney a chance, and she had never given her father a chance either. I like hypocrisy in characters cause it makes them complex. It makes the fight more interesting as well, cause otherwise its just suffering Olympics. And it hurts Olivia's character in my eyes cause thats really annoying and pointless. But interpreting it this way i can make more sense of it.

Book-Olivia, on the other hand. Her mother didn't die, she simply left. Olivia also does not remember her face. Her mom and dad had a teen pregnancy, the mom had drug problems and the dad already had minor criminal records. Mom left when she was 1. And her dad was a good father to her until she was 8. And she remembers that he was a good father. He had dreams of being an english teacher. And then he got fired from his taxi driving job, couldnt get another because of his past felonies, fell into old habits, and accidentally caused an old man to have a heart attack while attempting robbery with a toy gun. So he's in jail. And Olivia knows this stuff because she remembers. She was old enough to ask questions, to demand answers when her loving father suddenly wasn't coming home anymore. So she writes letters to him all the time, she keeps him updated on her life cause she knows he would like to be present, but can't. She also knows he made mistakes, and isnt looking for excuses for him. But he's a good father too. And she trusts him a lot. He's the person she trusts most in the world. So when she invites the band to visit him, she's trusting them as well.

Theyre similar backstories but also so different. Theres things i like about both. The Sydney-dad parallels in the movie are pretty good. Its what really sells it to me. The book's scene of the band visiting dad in prison is fantastic. I feel like the movie did a good job translating the book and adaptating Olivia's backstory. I quite like that the whole movie is Olivia's letter to her dad, telling him about her band. It's a pretty good way to tie her to her POVs from the book. ..I dont remember where i was going with this, honestly. I like Olivia. I may like movie-Olivia more just because, like i said, the hypocrisy makes her more complex. And book-Olivia is unfortunately a mystery i cant solve.

Mo's story is also pretty good in both. I feel like the only significant difference between book-Mo and movie-Mo is that Naomi's whole character is gone. So is her family owned store and the obvious religious references and practices, and Mo is seen doing less extracurriculars. So the illness she contracts before Rising Star in the movie feels less like a burn out and more like a really unfortunate coincidence - which lowkey sucks cause the burn out she feels is essential to Mo finally understanding that she cant keep overworking herself like this, which ultimately results into her coming to terms with the fact that she cant plan her whole future and expect it to not go wrong at some point. Cause that burned out Mo isnt the real Mo. Which then leads her to her confronting her dad. I understand why they cut Naomi out, but the fact that Mo had a pretty good friend before the band makes so much sense. She doesnt really struggle socially, its more that she has a family influenced plan for her future, and doesnt have time for other stuff (doesnt let herself have time for other stuff, especially after Scott). Mo in the book and in the movie do not feel like two different characters, it's more that the book has bonus content of the same girl. Its nice. Same thing with Stella and lowkey Wen, i think. And because of it i dont have much to say about Mo. Shes like Stella in the way that shes a very fleshed out character. Everything she does make sense. I highly recommend the book only for her POVs cause it touches her religion, faith and heritage in ways disney could never do cause theyre cowards. It really enriches her character. I love that even though she doesnt see eye to eye with her father, she still went and prayed with him. She doesn't hate her culture nor her religion. She values her family a lot and its especially telling in the book. I feel like thats a bit harder to see with movie-Mo.

Wen also feels like pretty much the same guy. In the movie they cut his pointless popular social hierarchy chase and replaced it with self absorbed jokes, which is important characterization nonetheless cause it tells the viewer that Wen isnt really insecure. In fact, id say he is very confident in himself. If he could, he wouldve named the band Wen. I dont think he is as confident in the book, but he also isnt trying to be someone he isnt, and you gotta be confident enough for that. He never tried to change who he is; he knows he is a weird guy but he thinks he still can be popular and That could work in his favor if he plays his cards right. But, through no fault of his own, he couldnt play them and thats why he fell so hard down the social hierarchy ladder. And he isnt happy about that. The Sydney situation in the book is a bit different from the movie, and way more awkward. Wen is described as being in love with her and the photographs he accidentally brought to school with him were Sydney's self portrait nude drawings. Its a very uncomfortable situation to everyone involved, including me that had to read and imagine it. I personally prefer the movie version of this cause it minimally touches Wen's problems with his mom leaving them behind and the impact it had on him. Sydney bothers movie-Wen so much because her presence is sudden, everywhere, and to him she's trying to replace something she could never be - his real mom. So he's angry and he lashes out. Thats way more interesting to me than having a teenage boy crush on your dad's 26 year old girlfriend. But i do like that he eventually realizes he grew out of it when Sydney starts treating him more "motherly" - fussing over his injury and offering him leftovers. It slightly-but-not-really touches the 'replacing his mom' role Sydney could have. Idk. Again, i like my characters when theyre more complex. Sure, the crushing on your dad's girlfriend brought him quite a lot of guilt, and that was a positive to me for his complexity's sake, but i feel like we already know so little about Wen's biological mom and how that affects him as is. Both in the movies and in the book, we're only told that she left them. Literally only that. I guess one could interpret it as she leaving them cause of a potential death, but i personally always saw it as abandonment. And something like that is ALWAYS gonna affect a child. At least movie-Wen touches a bit on how that affects Wen, and i like that.

Also wouldve it killed disney to give Wen his fucking glasses ?! Thats literally all thats different from his movie and book appearances and that kinda hurts a lil bit. Well, despite that Adam Hicks is kinda ginger and Wen is described as blond. But i dont think that matters much.

I guess to sum all this "character study" stuff up.

• Same character as in the movie but with bonus content: Mo and Stella.

• Movie has a different interpretation of the same character: Olivia.

• Movie and book got completely different characters they might as well have different names: Charlie. (and they do have different last names)

• Wen: Wen.

I do love the movie's songs cause theyre all a BANGER and i grew up listening to them. I just wish the book somehow had a CD built-in with their songs. Just so i could know what they sound like cause its REALLY hard to imagine. Especially cause the book gives us some song lyrics as well.

Anyway. Now to talk about the band itself. The book is interesting cause they all use unusual instruments: Stella plays an ukelele (she does know how to play electric guitar, but she ditches it for the sake of the band); Charlie's got a bunch of bongos and im-assuming-at-least-some-drum-plate-thingies; Wen plays the trumpet; Mo plays the big bass instrument that i forgot the name of; and Olivia sometimes plays an accordion + her voice. Olivia is also the only singer. I really like this cause its yet another reminder that those kids are weird. And thats CHARMING as hell !!! It kinda makes me sad that the movie didnt embrace these instruments cause im really fucking curious to how theyd sound together. Like, really, thats a big complaint of mine. Its such a weird mix of instruments that i really wish i could listen to them - its frustrating, even. I feel like that could change me as a person. Cause thats what so magical about them as a band. By all accounts they should not work well together, but they do somehow. Their instruments are a visual and soundful (?) (thats definitely not a word) representation of their weird friendship, its a reflection of it. Theyre all really different people but they somehow work well together. Theyre a family. And you cant separate them cause together theyre an unstoppable revolution.

One thing i really did Not like about the movie after having Book Hindsight, is the way the band reacts to Stella and the lemonade machine situation. In the movie it really feels sometimes that Stella is the only one that cares about that. Especially during the jail scene. I do love the Turn Up The Music callback but i HATE that they all blame Stella so blatantly and they never properly apologize. While in the book theyre ALL in this together, theyre fighting for what they believe in, and they never fault her for calling them and making them come to the school. Cause they all know its not just about the lemonade machine. Charlie does say in the book that "its just a stupid lemonade machine, Stella" but we know he doesnt really believe in that because of his thiughts. Its a half-hearted statement cause he might know its a lost cause but we Know he's worried as well, we know he doesnt mean it. But, at least to me, in the movie when they say stuff like that it really does feel like they dont care, sometimes. Especially when theyre in jail. And it kinda really fucking sucks. Its the main fucking theme of the book/movie !!!!!!! The lemonade machine matters cause it symbolyzes THEM !!!!! Its in their band name !!!!! And when they lose the machine they dont even feel like fighting for the band anymore !!!!!! Thats how much it bothers them that the machine is gone !!!!!

I think im gonna reread that part and rewatch the movie and come back to this actually. So i can judge and hate on this particular movie choice with more arguments.

[devilsrecreation]

Skink dynamic headcanons

Hasira and Waza:

So @spinnysocks headcanons these two are kinda like the Nne and Tano of the group. Best friends who see themselves as the most competent of the group lol. They’re very close with each other, so close they don’t even need to talk to each other sometimes cuz they know what the other is thinking. Like

“Want to catch some bugs?”

“You read my mind”

“Cool”

Also if one of them is having a bad day or if someone wrongs them, they’ll rant to the other and they’d be like “Such a jerk” or smth like Kiburi and Neema do hfhfgf

Njano and Nyororo:

I think Njano met Nyororo around the same time he met Shupavu, so they’re best friends. Although unlike with Shupavu, their friendship is strictly platonic. Whenever they’re together, Nyororo mostly enables Njano’s antics, which she finds amusing. Njano absolutely loves watching Nyororo use her tricks on someone, trying to hype everyone up even though they all know what’s about to happen. He even talks like a sports commentator afterwards like “And she’s done it again ladies and gentleskinks! Score one for Nyororo! And the crowd goes wild!”. Nobody cheers but at least it makes Nyororo laugh lol. Remember how I hc how Nyororo knows exactly what to say in any scenario? Never fails to amaze Njano

“Seriously, how does she do that?”

Shupavu and Hasira:

Although he was the last skink to agree Shupavu should be a leader when they all met, Hasira has grown to respect her and admits that she makes a great leader, even saying how she was born to be one. He’s even acted as sort of a mentor to her on a couple of occasions, giving her survival tips cuz he’s been through a lot of shit. Don’t think Shupavu doesn’t recognize his role as a babysitter cuz she’s absolutely grateful for that. She even thanks him for everything he’s done at one point, just to make sure he feels appreciated (Hasira actually smiled at that)

Nyororo and Hasira:

I feel like Hasira’s the only one not affected by Nyororo’s sweet talk jghfhf. Her manipulation tactic NEVER works on him and she doesn’t know why. She could understand if he was gay but he isn’t, he’s pan. Hasira’s secret is his experience lmao. He’s been through this shit before, he knows how it plays out. I feel like their dynamic is kinda like a tough, overprotective father and his pretty daughter (except they’re not actually related lol)

Njano and Nyeusi:

Nyeusi gets annoyed with Njano often, but they’re still good friends. They really balance each other out, with Nyeusi being the quiet, short-tempered who’s like a shadow and Njano being the colorful, happy one that does all the talking. Surprisingly, they work really well together, as Njano is able to tell what his friend is thinking.

Though Njano IS the most prone to forgetting stuff about Nyeusi, like the fact that he hates romance or that he’s even there in the first place lmao

Hasira and Nyeusi:

I’d say they’re good friends. They both bond over how annoying Njano can be (although unlike Hasira, Nyeusi actually likes him) and what kinds of things irk them.

I feel like Hasira sometimes talks about his own experiences with romantic partners and he finds himself getting a bit sentimental only to get interrupted by Nyeusi gagging or actually throwing up

Njano and Shupavu:

Oooh, what can I say for them that I haven’t already?

-Even though Njano fell first, Shupavu fell harder. He’s the light of her life and she doesn’t know what she would do without him

-They’ll defend each other no matter what. If anyone complains about Shupavu’s attitude, Njano would do nothing but talk about how awesome she is. When Kenge insults Njano and upsets him, Shupavu gives him a verbal beating

-Shupavu is usually the one to make Njano all flustered, but I like to think there was at least one time where Njano did or said something she considered attractive and she actually swooned (Njano has no clue)

Njano and Hasira:

Njano is Hasira’s LEAST favorite skink like he does not like him at ALL hghghg. He doesn’t think Njano takes his job (and life in general) very seriously with all his antics. Njano knows this and while he actually likes Hasira, he also loves annoying tf out of him out of spite, which only makes him seem more immature. They kind of have that Spongebob and Squidward dynamic, where there is a level of mutual care between the two of them but for it to come out of Hasira is uncommon

Njano and Nyata:

Oh those two share a brain cell fnfhhdhd. Their friendship is similar to that of Njano and Nyororo, except Nyata will actually join in on Njano’s antics and even has the same ideas as he does. Cue their “evil” laughter hffhhfd

Njano also made the best wingman when he found out about Nyata and Nyororo’s relationship, though he does make lighthearted jokes. Nyata doesn’t mind. She even encourages him like “I mean, where’s the lie?”

Shupavu and Nyeusi:

Based on a small scene in “The Rise of Scar”, it’s clear he’s one of the few animals that she really trusts. Not just because of his abilities, but also emotionally. He’s always there to listen whenever Shupavu wants to talk about something and has never once exposed her secrets bc he cares about her :)

Nyata and Nyororo:

Omg the girlfriends. I like to think their relationship was sort of “love at first sight” except neither of them knew it was mutual. After some pining and some encouragement from Shupavu and Njano, they decided to make it official. They tend to get super flirty with each other, trying to make the other as flustered as possible (Nyata always wins lol). Like Nyororo would hit on Nyata and Nyata would be like “What’s stopping you?~” and Nyororo surrenders.

Their friends find it adorable, others just yell at them to get a room 😭

Nyeusi and Waza:

Waza’s usually the one to calm Nyeusi down whenever he’s pissed off at something/someone, being the mediator and all. I like to think they also “train” together, meaning they put their skills to the test with each other. Nyeusi would do his best to hide somewhere and Waza would use his keen eye to try to find him. Waza always finds him :)

Nyeusi and Nyata:

Surprisingly, they did NOT like each other when they first met. Nyata would go out of her way just to piss Nyeusi off, which results in him hissing at her. But as time went on and after Nyeusi helped her escape getting eaten, the two developed a more sibling-like relationship. Nyata thinks it’s fun to annoy Nyeusi, but they’d let the world burn for each other

Njano and Waza:

Waza doesn’t mind Njano’s antics as much as the other boys so they’re pretty chill. He even keeps an open mind about it, saying how maybe Njano’s ideas won’t be so bad. They’ve worked before, right? Njano appreciates it

Though Njano still either gets told off or slapped by Waza whenever he’s bothering Hasira hfhfh. Njano gets back at him by calling out Waza’s inconvenience

The skink dynamic is what I like to call “hilariously functional”, meaning they’re by no means dysfunctional like the other Outlanders, but hilarity always ensues no matter how well they work together

[lumenflowered]

[A video is attached. It's unclear who's filming, but if the fact that Dee—currently wrapped up in a cozy-looking blanket—has her own device lying next to her is any indication, whoever is filming is probably using Maria's Pokégear, which gives it fairly high odds of being Ade.

"I... would like to ask a question, if that is... if that is alright."

At a glance, Dee still seems visibly shaken, which is kind of impressive considering she is literally a sentient doll. She's sitting on what seems to be some sort of pull-out couch bed, in what appears to be someone's spare room. Her Persian is sprawled over the rest of the bed, as well as her lap.

"Of course," Maria says. "More than alright."

Dee sighs. Her shoulders slump.

"...Why do you care about me at all? Mallory, I think I understand, even if she insists she's terrible at caring about anyone... but why you? I... I only exist because someone you trusted..."

"It would be incredibly unfair of me," Maria says after a moment, "to blame you for the actions of another. You aren't Gehrman. You aren't me, either."

"But... that nightmare..."

"It was sent specifically to harm you. As mailed nightmares so often are." Maria sighs. "You aren't the first who has been forced to relive what I lived, that day. Nor are you the first to take it poorly. I don't believe anyone would take it well, though I suppose some would be less affected than others."

"...Eileen. Right." Dee sighs. "Do you ever wonder what happened to our Eileen? Mallory doesn't know. Not that she likes admitting it."

"I... hope that, wherever she might be, she is alright," Maria says quietly. "Though I would settle for alive."

"As would I..."

"Well," Maria says after a brief pause, "I rather doubt I'm the only Faller who has ended up in another place by way of death. So it is quite possible, that if she died..."

"I hope so."

"As do I."

Both women fall silent for a time. Dee runs a hand through her Persian's fur absently, something he responds to with a sleepy mrrp and by rolling over. Eventually, she reaches for her own device.

"I should likely... let others know..."

"Wait," Maria says, suddenly.

Dee hesitates. "Is... something wrong?"

"I... not exactly, but..."

There's a look in Maria's eyes, suddenly, as if she's come to a decision. As if, on all levels but physical, she's decided: fuck it, we ball. Or she would have if that was one of the handful of modern phrases she'd decided she liked enough to incorporate into her own vocabulary, but the sentiment remains.

"I've had... relatively little connection to those I was unfortunate enough to consider my blood relations, over the years," Maria says. "Even before I died. Even before I left without looking back. My parents were... they cared more about keeping up appearances than about who I was. And the less that is said about Annalise, the better."

"Who... never mind," Dee says quietly. "I'm... not quite certain where you are going with this?"

"Fortunately," Maria continues, "family doesn't have to be by blood. The blacksmith working there did more for me than my blood family ever did—I sincerely hope he made it out, before the end—and... there was a time I, foolishly, considered my mentor within the Hunters to be family as well."

"...You mean Gehrman."

"Clearly, he saw things differently than I," Maria says with no small amount of bitterness in her voice. "I hope neither of us ever have to deal with him again, but that isn't... this isn't about him."

"I'm still not sure where this is..."

"This is about you," Maria says, and Dee immediately falls silent. "If I was someone else, this might be where I'd say something about how I'd always wanted a sister, but I'm not someone else, and I have no desire to lie to you. It was better that I was an only child, when I was young. That I had no siblings to protect, for I could scarcely protect myself in those days."

Maria breathes out slowly, and holds out a gloved hand to Dee, from where she's sitting on the edge of the bed. "But things are different now. We are both different now. I'll confess I don't have any idea of how this would normally work, but I don't believe either of us have to, and others have been assuming we are related for quite some time regardless."

Dee stares at the offered hand. She's frozen in place, and stopped petting Gascoigne the Persian, who mrrs in clear displeasure at the fact that she's stopped.

"We are related," Dee says quietly. "But not in the way that others frequently assume."

"We could be," Maria says, continuing to hold out her hand. "If you're open to it. I consider you to be family, perhaps the last I have left. Whether you consider me the same... that is not a decision I, or anyone else, can—or should—make for you."

Dee stares at the offered hand for a little longer. Gascoigne mrrps louder.

At last, she takes it, with a faint smile. "I... yes. I think I'd like that. But I do have a question related to this..."

"Of course," Maria says.

"...What is a sister?"

The video ends.]

[coredrill]

perhaps my most insane collection of brvn thots yet

do we think lulu is from the moon. i think this for three reasons. one: when she told superbia she was going to ride him the moon was quite large and prominent in the shot. symbolism. two: when she got her fancy hairdo, she had two little buns that looked like moons. three: “lulu” could come from “luna” the same way it could come from the first syllable of smith’s name. why would she become spanish? don’t worry abt it. also if she’s from there then maybe the “final battle” which obari allegedly said would take place in an unexpected location will indeed be on the moon (pls dont ask for a source on this bc i don’t think i could find it again but it was one of the like. EARLY early interviews iirc. or it was just a rumor. this part of the post is a joke anyways LMAO). however this IS a super robot show so i feel like the moon in general is actually a more expected location for me than like. idk. cleveland

everyone pointing out the animation differences maybe indicating different timelines is so funny to me cause like. if it’s NOT intentional, the fans are putting together a list of fixes to make for the bluray on a silver platter LMAO. also god i hope we get a western bluray release, i honestly am considering getting the jp one if it somehow winds up w eng subs though just cause i know it’s such a long shot for CRUNCHYROLL of all motherfuckers to put one together 🥲 discotek ur our only hope………………

i keep thinking abt the like. pacing of the previous fight scenes being reused in ep9 in such a smart way…………like with smith/lulu v superbia - isami/bravern v cupiridas AND with smith/lulu v knuth - isami/bravern v pessimism/vanitas they kept doing the quick jumps between each of the two fights in a way that made it clear that isami and smith were in conversation even if they were doing completely different shit, and then bringing that completely to the forefront this ep while isami is asking smith why he died and at the same time smith is refusing to die bc of his promise with isami. BLEW MY FUCKIN MIND to see the pattern reused like that, i swear to GOD everyone talks about how fun and hype this show is but it’s so damn GOOD too 😭😭 and then after that the fuckin. symmetrical docking ass cut and then later the gattai which has been held off for SO long bc they are no longer separate conversations. JESUS

called my shots too early tho w smith not melting ppl’s minds in a kaworu manner where they convolute the story x1000 to try to make him seem straight 😭 congrats white boy, your days are numbered until ppl start saying you love isami like he’s your pet dog……….also in a related fashion the giant naked smith fanarts are taking me out LMAO

you can tell idk shit abt fuck when it comes to time travel fuckery cause i rly am just here like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ atp LMAO, the serious theorizing is GONE. i trust the show to finish out in a satisfying manner and also in a way that my pea brain can understand and i’m rly looking forward to savouring these last 3 episodes :] and then rewatching the whole thing from the beginning once the remaining twists have been revealed and i Know :3 like not to get way too sentimental w 3 whole episodes left but we are so lucky to be following this story in real time you guys 😭 like i’m just gonna put the same post i made back after episode ONE here cause it’s true but times a million with what we’ve seen so far, truly this is such a special experience to have and i’m so glad this show waited until i got into mecha to get made so that i could like. Understand it yknow. anyways good for january 14 2024 version of me, you are so excited andyet still have NO idea the kind of treat you are in for 😭

“lewis” jumpscare tho omg. i forgot it took me like a week to figure out what the hell was goin on with all the characters first and last names LMAO. anyways everybody go look at sumiisa sekiha love love tenkyouken right now i am no longer asking

[catgriffin]

Just saw your post in the tag about the Vees being "irredeemable" and I'm curious as to why you feel that way. It's a pretty common sentiment so you have company, I just personally struggle to see the justification for it especially in a show where the main theme is that anyone can be redeemed/deserves a second chance (or at least that is Charlie's goal).

We know that 1.) Charlie wanted to spare Adam, an angel that had been committing a devastating genocide against her people for decades, 2.) Charlie tries to see the good in Alastor even though he's a psychopathic cannibal that she recognizes isn't completely on board with her goals (and actively participates in the oppressive soul ownership system) and 3.) Charlie forgave Vaggie who actively participated in the genocide against her people. I'd argue Angel Dust and Pentious are far more sympathetic characters (to both us, the audience, and Charlie herself) since we are told virtually nothing about their crimes that landed them in Hell and we meet them when they're both at their lowest.

While I understand everyone has their favorites and the show likely isn't interested in exploring its central theme too deeply, I do think it would be such a missed opportunity not to have Charlie confronted with the hypocrisy of offering salvation to some but not all - to stumble in her beliefs and be forced to claim some people are "irredeemable". What does that arbitrary determination criteria look like to her? How is she equipped to make those decisions?

And, if the criteria to get into Heaven, isn't to actually confront your past and current life but rather sacrifice yourself for others (based on Pentious and his ascension) then that's absolutely (in my opinion) something the Vees would be capable of. If Charlie can look past the crimes of Adam and Alastor and offer them grace then she should be capable of doing that for characters like Vox, Velvette, and even Valentino.

I personally think it would add a lot to Charlie's character if she had to actually stand firmly in her convictions that every sinner has the capacity to change OR for her to grapple with the fact she is biased and her ideology is inherently flawed.

But those are just my thoughts. Like I said, I see "the Vees are irredeemable" get echoed quite a bit but am always curious where it stems from. I think there are a lot of good arguments to be made, but the setting/core theme of the show really challenges them (for me anyway). I think a bigger issue you'd run into is certain characters not wanting redemption at all, but with some plot adjustment I think you could make it work since so many of the characters are still blank slates this early on. And I hope it goes without saying but I'm not excusing the actions of any of these characters, simply challenging the idea of who is really "irredeemable" in a show where every single person is bad and they are already in "Hell" facing judgment for their transgressions.

Always an interesting topic and hope you don't see it as an attack or anything.

I appreciate that you asked this in a nice way, people often get very upset over it. Vox is actually one of my favorite characters. And if any of the vees were to get redeemed I think it'd be him. He is desperate to love, he loved alastor and now chases Valentino. And if sacrifice truly is the way to get to heaven, I can't really see Valentino being the one to sacrifice himself. At least, not how he currently is. I don't know enough about velvette to make a correct assumption. And to be fair we don't truly know how vox feels about angel. He may have called him a wh*re because he was trying to relate and calm down Valentino in that moment.

The only reason I feel they can't be redeemed is because they have the same mindset alastor currently does:

1) redemption isn't possible

2) I dont want to go to heaven if it was

[greatandholypangolin]

“oh no they’re crying now what do I do” helpline

When people go through some shit and they tell you about it, whether it be grief, or breakups, or something traumatic, it’s difficult to say the right thing, correct? You feel trapped in the cliched “I’m so sorry for your loss, I’m here if you need me.” While these are the right sentiments, they’re overused and feel like they aren’t genuine. So here’s some advice to be real and vulnerable and say roughly the right things:

it boils down to 3ish steps. Acknowledge, ask, advice. I’ll provide examples too of what specifically you could say, if the scenario was that their mother has just died. Feel free to adapt them for other things.

ACKNOWLEDGE: literally just acknowledge that what happened was really shit and that it really sucks that they’re going through that. It’s just a little thing, but it’s so important and so many people miss it. Some of our AuDHD friends out there may also want to talk about their similar experiences to show that they understand. This is logical, showing you relate in a way to empathise, but it can also seem like you’re moving the focus from them to you, which isn’t the aim. A way to still show that you relate is to say that you’ve experienced something similar, but don’t go into any detail. EG “yeah, I’ve had something like that happen to me. It felt/you must feel *insert sentiment*” it’s kind of important that you say that IT felt, or YOU will feel, rather than *I* felt, because that makes the struggle more general, rather than being about you. Let’s do our sample sentence. “She’s gone? I’m so sorry, that must be so shit. We all loved her, but it must be so much more intense for you because you were so close to her. I love you” (feel free to swear and not use the “correct” language, and don’t be afraid to tell them that you genuinely love them)

ASK: ask them what they need from you now. I recommend making it multiple choice rather than an open statement, because they probably have a lot to think about. Make “just leave” an option for them, non-judgementally. If they don’t respond or can’t think about it, that can get more difficult. Based on what you already know about them, you can either just sit next to them in silence as a comforting presence, talk to them, either about the tragedy or about whatever’s on your mind, or go and help things out, keep busy and sort things out for them. If you’re in their house, it’s a perfect chance to just clean stuff up a little bit. They’d appreciate it. Here’s our sample! “Hey, do you need anything from me? Do you want to talk about her, or should I change the subject? We can play some games or something… or I can let you sit for a while? I’d be fine with that, if that’s what you need.”

ADVICE: this is based on what they said in the ask segment, but it’s just some advice on what to do next. The advice should boil down to “take some time to sort yourself out, you don’t owe anyone anything right now, responsibilities can wait, etc”. If they tell you to leave in the ask segment, say “that’s ok. Remember that you’re allowed to be weak about this. You don’t have to be fine.” As you leave. A lot of people will be telling them to stay strong, and that they’re being so brave. Don’t be them. Also, if you don’t know what advice to give, just tell them that. Be vulnerable. Say that you don’t know what to do in this situation either, but you’ll always be there to support them. Remember, if you’re vulnerable and honest and open, then they’ll feel safe to be the same. SAMPLE- “Listen, I don’t know what I’d even do in your situation, it’s so much… much. Just take a week to work things out. The admin stuff can wait. And it’s fine if you cut off from people. We’ll understand, and we still all love you.

if ANYONE says that “everything happens for a reason” or “god doesn’t give us struggles we can’t withstand” I will be flaying you. Bad.

[darthchic]

It’s literally been years since I’ve posted anything TMNT related on here (mostly I just come on here to lurk… That’s such a great word…)

But I have now seen TMNT: Mutant Mayhem and I wanted to jot down my thoughts before I forget, cause I freakin’ LOVED it!

- first off, loved the animation, it was hideously beautiful, an imperfect beauty. I mean, the style is supposed to look like a teenager’s messy scribbles, right? And it does.

- Did anyone else get ‘Stranger Things’ vibes from the background music at times? Guess they wanted to inject a little 80s/90s flavour. Understandable.

- Most people seem to have a favourite turtle and mine is still Leo. I’ve not consumed every iteration of the turtles, especially not the comics, but for everything I’ve seen, he’s always consistently won my heart. He’s just such a GOOD BOI! My blue lame-o dork (said with much affection)

- I was just awwwing away during that scene where they were watching ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’. For me, it’s really the first time a version of the turtles really hammered in the longing the boys have to be a part of the human world and be normal teenagers. And seeing Leo notice a couple snuggling together and clearly wanting something like that himself? My boy just wants some romance dagnabbit!

- They added another element of sentimentality into Splinter’s backstory. Establishing that as a common rat, humans didn’t like him, and not many other animals liked him either. And then he finds these baby turtles who just love him unconditionally from the start? You can kinda see why he’s overprotective and a tad clingy. And when all those people made him drop his babies on the street, and Mikey onto the road in front of incoming traffic, it was a very “HOW DARE YOU” moment for me.

- April was a pretty cool character, I liked that she could relate to the turtles’ goal of wanting to achieve something great in order to be accepted. Throwing up in front of your school would be hard for a teen to live down. Poor Puke Girl. But I also liked that April kinda realises, at least from my point of view, that even though she went through something humiliating, it really doesn’t compare to what the turtles have to deal with. Maybe she even realised that she takes what she has for granted? So, I love that by the end, she was more focused on helping the turtles find acceptance rather than trying to help herself.

- Then the same could be said for the turtles. They still wanted to be heroes, even if that doesn’t guarantee they’ll be accepted by humans. It was so cute seeing Leo hype up his bros; I think the music for this scene is called “Better Than Mark Ruffalo”, and I had to go find it to listen to it again, cause it puts a smile on my face. Plus, Raph is able to tip over a van with his bare hands. Do they all have super strength or is this just the awesome power of Raph’s rage?

- Can I say, I was kinda shocked that SuperFly was allowed to say things like “Piss me off” in a PG rated movie? I’m so used to PG movies being extra kiddie-proof, where even words like *gasp* God and “kill” are seen as baaaaaaad words

- It’s kinda amusing to me that only poor Mikey and Raph got their blood sucked by the ‘Milking Machine’ and Leo and Donnie got off scot free. Though they did all get electrocuted several times before that.

- Also, Cynthia Utrom, is she gonna reveal that she’s really a tiny alien in a robot body some time down the road, or is this gonna be a red herring?

- I think the all-star cast they had for all the extra mutants (minus Ice Cube as SuperFly) was kinda wasted a little bit, but if they’re brought back for the sequel and the series then I’m assuming they’ll get a bit more attention.

- Seeing the turtles going to school was such a sweet new take, I imagine there’s probably a few fanfic authors out there screeching

- As for any romantic subplots, I don’t think people are gonna be as bothered by Leo’s crush on April as they were by Donnie’s crush in the 2012 series. But, we’ll see how the series deals with it going forward, especially if they decide to re-introduce Casey. Please not another love triangle! Does anyone even like those things anymore!?

- And uh, Splinter’s ‘relationship’ with Scumbug? Well, at least he’s happy…

- And last but not least, the reveal of Shredder at the end of the mid credits scene... Why is he connected to TCRI? Will the Foot Clan still exist? Is Shredder really just gonna be some bounty hunter for TCRI? Cause I feel Shredder always needs a much grander role, or a more personal vendetta with the turtles, and seemingly with Splinter no longer being Hamato Yoshi or having any connection with that character, I wonder where they’re going with this version of the Shredder?

[femmefatalevibe]

Hello I'm sorry to bother you but I was wondering if you could lend some advice about online friends? I'm only 19yrs old right now and I'm fairly new to social media related things because I had a late start to being involved with phones and internet stuff because of strict parents. (I understand if you prefer not to answer so it's okay to delete this ask 🖤)

Tw: there's bully related issues involved aswell as slight depression.

But well...I had a good friend (on here actually) and what happened is we were both going through very bad times in our lives which caused us to start to disagree and misunderstand eachother alot.

I tried to console her and support her as best as I could because she was going through a lot of negative family related issues and I didn't want her to feel alone, but as time went on and I explained to her I was also very unhappy and sad because of a severe bullying problem that I started to close myself off and developed a bit of a trust issue with the people around me online because I was afraid maybe this anonymous hatred was coming from someone I know so at times I was in the wrong aswell with the way I spoke to her.

That being said she was not very considerate of my sadness and feelings, I was personally upset with the way she would speak to me as someone younger than her and someone I trusted to tell my issues to; she would speak to me very rudely and would say hurtful things like "you should see a doctor" or "I think you have low self-esteem" and that was not something I personally found respectable to say to me when I was just explaining my bullying issues to her.

I felt very alone and a couple days later I had apologize to her for probably upsetting her with my negative problems, I personally never meant to give her stress because I understood she was still stressed herself; so later on we talked again and once again she completely disrespected my feelings and I asked her if she still wanted to be friends which she responded with a "No" and I felt very betrayed quite frankly but I also had to understand that she and I were drifting apart from the beginning.

She was one of my best friends so I tried to tell her I didn't want us to drift apart like this but she started to become very angry and belittled my feelings and me myself by using my mental well-being against me and I just couldn't take it anymore so I ended up blocking her.

But I'm still hurt and sometimes I feel very angry at her but other times I miss her alot; even figuring out another friend of mines is friends with her I wish all three of us could be together as friends...

I am still very bitter about it because I miss my old friend despite our anger, sadness and misunderstandings to eachother's personal issues.

Do you have any advice on how to cope with a broken online friendship? And also for you personally how do you feel about a friend still talking to a old toxic friend?

I would really appreciate your advice and thank you for your time on this matter. 🖤

Hi love!

Thank you for trusting me with these vulnerable emotions. Allow me to first let you know that your pain and sadness over the devolution of this friendship are completely valid. In a situation like this where both people are going through difficult seasons and someone chooses to be hostile, please know that this person is too self-involved to be a good friend to you. While she may have her own understandable issues, you should only keep friends who ultimately enhance your life and support your emotional well-being. Her actions are a reflection of her inner wounds, not yours. So, by pleading to be part of her life again, you only betray yourself and your needs. Take that sentiment into consideration the next time you beg her to connect.

Hope this helps xx