#Tbh didn't expect to feel different from gaining weight

[chickenisamazing]

Gaining this much weight has been weird I didn't think it would feel like this

[too-many-fandoms-tbh]

LATE NIGHT SKATE NIGHT

PERCY JACKSON SMUT

(percy x fem!reader)

warnings : sex, p in v, oral fem!receiving, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, car sex, rivalry, porn without plot tbh

she knew it was late, but after a long day at work, y/n couldn't help but go to the skatepark. if luck was on her side, she'd get the park to herself. it usually wasn't all that busy, especially after sunset on a wednesday night.

she pulled into the parking lot nearby, grabbing her skateboard from the trunk and locking her mini-van. sure, it was a lame car, but she had gotten it when she moved out since it had so much space.

grabbing her skateboard, y/n jogged into the park. by the looks of the empty parking lot, she'd expected it to be, you know, empty, but there was still someone inside. upon further inspection, she realized just who it was.

percy jackson. he had been a pain in her ass ever since she moved here last year. they were rivals in the skating world, constantly trying to one up each other. to make matters even worse, he lived right next to her at their apartment complex, so there was no avoiding him and the blaring music he listened to.

he hadn't noticed her yet, too busy off in his own world. she stood at the edge of the large bowl, watching him skate from side to side before eventually spotting her. he gained enough momentum to shoot up a smaller section of the bowl and pulled himself back onto the concrete.

"enjoying the show, eh?" he mocked. "you could learn some tips from me."

she turned to glare at him. "don't flatter yourself, jackson. i'm only here to skate. it's not my fault you don't have a life."

"fine," his smirk didn't fall. "but don't get mad when i'm better than you."

she flipped him off, leading percy to childishly stick his tongue out at her in response. since the bowl was so big, consisting of multiple different drop-off points, the two managed to keep their distance pretty well. even then, they'd often pass each other in the center, sending increasingly more angry glares each time.

at one point, y/n shoved percy's arm when they passed each other. he didn't fall immediately, but the disturbance to his balance distracted him enough that he crashed into a nearby wall.

y/n smirked as she watched him fall. the tension between the two kept growing as they continued skating. it wasn't even a minute later that percy tried to return the favor.

they passed each other in the middle, and percy shoved y/n's arm. he seemed to forget how much stronger he was than her, because he did a lot more damage to her than she did to him.

"you asshole!" y/n shrieked. she grabbed onto percy's arm to try and stabilize herself, but since they were heading opposite directions, the two crashed onto the concrete.

y/n landed on her back, wincing as her head hit the concrete. their skateboards went rolling away as percy crashed on top of her.

panting, percy planted his hands on the ground and pushed himself up. their legs were still tangled together, and y/n could feel his hips brushing against hers. he hovered over her, the both of them panting as they looked at each other.

"shit, you alright?" percy asked. shifting his weight to his left arm, he cradled the back of her head with his right hand.

y/n was frozen under him, her eyes clouding with lust as she stared up at him. she could feel his warm breath tickling her nose, sending the fresh scent of mint radiating through her nostrils.

she blinked as she remember his initial question. "mhm," she barely managed to squeak out.

both of their chests were heaving as the two stared at each other. suddenly, before they had even realized, their lips connected.

percy brought y/n cradled head closer to him, the veins in his left arm popping out from supporting him for this long. without breaking the kiss, he slowly pulled his hand out from under her.

still hovering over her, percy pulled away to catch his breath. "you sure you didn't hit your head?" he murmured.

y/n gaped up at him. "positive."

shifting his weight to his knees, percy's hands ventured to y/n waist. with a tight grip, he flipped the two over. y/n gasped as she now found herself on top of percy.

using her shock, percy slipped his tongue into her mouth. the two fought for dominance as y/n shifted, moving her knees to so that she was now straddling his hips. sliding her hand down his chest, y/n suddenly palmed percy through his jeans.

percy bucked his hips up with a groan. y/n smirked, now taking over dominance in the kiss. taking advantage of his now free hands, percy got his revenge. he slipped both of his hands between their bodies, gripping each of her breasts tightly through her shirt.

the wetness pooling between her legs mixed with the feeling of percy's hardness against her clothed crotch was driving y/n insane. desperate for any sort of friction, she rutted her hips against him.

a couple minutes later and the two were going mad. there was only so much making out, fully clothed, groping and grinding on each other, that two young-adults could take.

y/n pushed herself up on her arms like percy had done earlier, causing percy to detach his lips from her neck with a wet pop. he brushed her hairs out of his face, looking up at her with lust-filled confusion and concern.

"can we take this someplace else?" she murmured.

"your car?" percy suggested.

"please."

together, they scrambled out of the bowl. barely remembering their skateboards, the two raced to the car.

y/n won, unlocking her car and opening the back door. it was only now that she remembered she had put the back seats down, meaning the entire back of the car, trunk and all, was empty for them.

she climbed inside, percy quick on her heels. by the time he had shut the door, y/n had already tore her shirt off. percy turned and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of her full breasts, which were still enclosed in a navy blue bra.

"eager are we?" percy teased once he got over his initial awe.

"oh shut up." y/n grabbed the bottom of his sweatshirt, yanking aggressively up. from where he was sat on his knees, percy choked on his breath. he helped her take it off, only for her to find out he had a t-shirt on underneath.

"why are you wearing so many layers?" she huffed annoyedly. before she could reach out, percy tore his t-shirt off as well. she immediately closed her mouth, freezing when muscles she didn't even know he had were suddenly on full display.

"and why are you so judgey?" he asked back. before she could respond, percy leaned forward. he grabbed her wrists, pinning them to the floor above her head. she gasped, falling on the floor and lying on her back. percy crawled forward, using his left knee to part her legs.

she squirmed under him, unable to free her hands. "and why are you so strong?" she complained, grinding her clothed crotch against his knee.

percy grinned, leaning down and pressing peppering kisses down her jawline. y/n continued to grind against his knee, letting out a shocked moan when percy's lips found the sweet spot on her neck.

his lips moved down her neck, his free hand toying carelessly with the waistband of her leggings. his lips slowly trailed across her collarbone, leaving gentle hickeys across the skin, until his lips reached her bra, at which point he frowned.

y/n struggled under his grip. "if you let me have my damn hands," she sassed. "then i could take it off."

with a roll of his eyes, percy let go of her wrists. she smirked in triumph, sitting up long enough to unclip her bra and slide the straps off of her shoulders. whilst she did so, percy grabbed his discarded sweatshirt off of the floor and slid it under her head like a cushion.

the second her breasts were exposed, percy groaned. his tongue swirled around her  nipple, sucking on the supple skin. he softly bit at her hardened bud, eliciting a low moan from her mouth.

when he got done giving each breasts equal attention, which only worked her up even more, percy left soft kitten licks down her stomach. y/n could tell he was hard based off of the way his dick strained in his jeans, but it seemed that making her writhe under him was more important to him than taking care of his own needs.

deciding he'd teased her enough, percy's calloused fingers ran softly across her hips and under the waistband of her leggings. after double checking that he had her consent, percy swiftly pulled her pants and underwear down at the same time. she lifted her hips up, craning her neck to watch percy shuffle backwards.

when the sudden cool air hit her bare pussy, y/n felt herself squeeze around nothing. she closed her legs, pressing her thighs tightly together.

percy tsked at her. he grabbed her knees, forcing her legs apart. when he saw the arousal dripping out from her, he gulped.

"shit, y/n," he practically growled. she tried to close her legs again out of embarrassment, but he held them open. "if i'd have known you'd look like this for me, i'd have crashed into you a long time ago."

"shut up," she sat back on her elbows. "put that mouth to good use before i fuck it myself." logically, her words didn't make sense, but they did the trick.

"someone's feisty," percy teased, lying down on his stomach in front of her. "but since you asked so nicely..."

he licked one long strip across her folds and y/n could've sworn she screamed. she went to close her legs around his head, but his arms wrapped around her thighs and forced them apart yet again. his tongue dipped inside her, twisting and flexing until she was desperate for more. his nose tickled her clit, causing her to try and pull him impossibly closer.

she'd received head before, but never before did it feel so good. it was as if he never even had to come up for breath.

y/n gripped his hair tightly, yanking on the messy waves. she felt one of his arms untangle from under her thigh, and before she knew what he was doing, percy inserted a finger inside of her.

she clenched around his finger and percy laughed, sending vibrations shocking through her cunt. his tongue moved from her hole and to her clit, swirling figure-eights over the bundled nerves.

he inserted a second finger, alternating between scissoring them and pumping them in and out. his tongue still swirled her clit, sometimes fully sucking on it and other times just teasing her.

she could feel herself getting closer, her whines and pants getting louder as she tried to buck her hips up. percy laughed again, only turning her on even more, and looked up at her.

the feeling of him softly nipping at her clit mixed with his piercing eyes looking up at her made y/n snap. she threw her head back, suddenly thankful for the sweatshirt-pillow percy gave her. she felt herself unravel, embarrassingly loud moans falling from her lips.

percy rode her through her orgasm, his tongue lapping up her juices before they could hit the car floor. when she finally relaxed, he pulled away. y/n gasped at the sudden cool emptiness, closing her legs as soon as he pulled away.

percy crawled up her body, hovering over her and pulling her into another long kiss. she could taste herself on his tongue. whilst they were kissing, y/n reached down, blindly fumbling with his jeans. she managed to unbutton and unzip the fabric without breaking the kiss.

percy pulled and sat up, shuffling both his jeans and boxers down his hips and taking them off completely. y/n's eyes widened as his dick sprung free. it looked almost painfully hard, with precum coating the tip.

she crawled up to sit on her knees, preparing to return the favor, but percy shook his head. "no, no. that's sweet, but i need to be inside you right fucking now."

y/n nodded with a gulp. she had never been one to submit, but here she was, looking up at him with wide eyes as she waited for him to do something.

instead of touching her like she'd expected, percy backed away. he sat on the floor with his back to the drivers seat, leaning against it for support. his dick stuck up, long and thick, near his stomach. he fished a condom out of his jean pockets, ripping open the package and sliding it on himself.

"come here," he invited. y/n crawled towards him, not even caring if he'd tease her for her eagerness later. "i want you to ride me."

y/n crawled on his lap, straddling his thigh and ignoring his dick. she brought her fingers up to his hair, giving a few strands a playful tug. "you want me to, yeah?" she'd composed herself enough to get her attitude back.

percy glared at her, his hands running roughly up and down her waist. "i can feel you dripping down my thigh," he said through grit teeth. "so just get on my fucking dick."

"wow," y/n shook her head with a laugh. she then remembered what he'd said to her minutes ago. "since you asked so nicely..."

she lifted herself up, positioning percy's dick under her cunt. making direct eye contact, she slowly lowered herself onto him.

they both moaned, y/n throwing her head back so hard her neck cracked. "fuck," she panted out. "you're so big."

percy let out a shaky exhale when she slowly circled her hips, trying to adjust to his size. "yeah? you're- shit- you're so tight." he rebutted. he was quite literally inside of her, and yet the two still managed to keep up their snarky comebacks.

slowly, y/n lifted herself up. when only the tip was left inside of her, she dropped back down with a moan. percy's hands explored her body, running over each and every of her curves. his hands wrapped around her body and cupped her ass, grasping it as if his life depended on it. he helped her bounce up and down, his hands eventually moving to her breasts, which were bouncing right in his face.

"holy fuck.." he muttered as he watched her. she'd always been beautiful, that much was undeniable, but seeing this side of her was something brand new.

y/n continued to bounce up and down, sweat building on her forehead from the effort. eventually, she slowed down, and percy's hands gripped her hips. he helped to guide her, watching as her movements got sloppier and her moans louder.

she was nearing her climax when percy lifted her off of him. she landed lazily on the the floor next to him, a vicious glare in her hazy eyes.

"the fuck was that for?" she demanded.

percy shifted so that he was kneeling. "as hot as that was, i've gotta move. lay on your stomach, ass up."

"excuse me?" she said, though she couldn't deny the fact that she was incredibly turned on. in all of her other one night stands, she'd been the dominant one, and so percy bossing her around was something completely new. it's safe to say it was a pleasant new.

"you heard me."

y/n rose her eyebrows. "make me."

percy laughed darkly, though it was almost a moan. in the dim lighting from outside, y/n saw his dick twitch. "you don't wanna do this." he said.

"oh but i do."

the two had an angrily stare down before percy moved towards her. swiftly, he grabbed her neck. she thought he may choke her, but instead, he roughly shoved her down. she fell on her stomach, her head landing safely on the makeshift sweatshirt-pillow.

"what are you-" her words got cut off when he grabbed her thighs and pulled upwards. she pulled her knees closer to her chest, leaving her pussy and ass on full display for percy.

"oh fuck," percy exhaled, running his hands over her ass. y/n turned her head to glance back at him, her cheek pressingly comfortably into the sweatshirt.

"well?" she demanded. "you wanted this, now fuck me."

"let me know if i'm too rough." percy told her. before she could respond, he suddenly pushed into her. y/n choked out a strangled moan, her fingers scraping the the rough carpet of the car in search of something to ground her.

percy was relentless. he held her hips, thrusting fast, deep, and hard into her. the whole car was shaking at this point, and y/n was thankful she didn't have to hold herself up, because she was pretty sure her arms would've collapsed by now.

his thrusts got sloppier as percy neared his climax. y/n was close too, her uncontrollable moans an obvious sign of that. when percy reached down to fiddle with her overly-sensitive clit, she knew she would break.

she clenched around percy, letting out a sputtering moan as she came. the feeling of her squeezing around him was enough to send percy over the edge. together, the two climaxed, both moaning messes.

percy slowed his thrusts before eventually pulling out. the second he let go of her hips, y/n's legs fell limp. percy took off the full condom and tied it off, setting it in an empty walmart bag he found on the otherwise clean floor. at the same time, y/n rolled onto her back, her chest heaving as she worked to get over her post-orgasm shock. normally, she was fine after sex, but it was different with percy. everything was different with him.

"you good?" percy asked, lying on his back next to her.

"good is one way to put it," y/n mumbled. "you?"

percy turned his head to look at her, only to find she was already looking at him. "good. we should do this again some time."

"yeah?" y/n looked up to him with a hopeful smile. "but maybe next time with a bed."

as she spoke, she sat up, rubbing her back softly. she'd gotten rug burn from how much she'd squirmed around when percy was eating her out.

percy laughed, sitting up as well. he reached around the trunk, collecting all of their discarded clothing items. "speaking of beds," he spoke. "you think i could get a ride home?"

y/n smiled at him, grabbing her clothes and slowly slipping on her thong. "yeah, of course."

the two got dressed and percy opened the door, stepping out into the crisp night air. he held the door for y/n, who almost immediately fell over. she thought she'd be fine by now, but her legs were still a shaking mess.

"on second though," she stumbled towards the passenger seat with a giggle. "why don't you drive?"

[omnidemidisaster]

Underrated ship...Like bro- They would be a strange yet cute duo

Roy x Susie headcanons

I like to think for Roy it was a crush at first sight

Like he laid eyes on a pretty girl and instantly went "damn"

He tried to talk with her to become friends, stuttering on nearly every word

Susie didn't think much on it, just thinking he was shy

Roy did not realize that she was Pumps older sister

That was until Pump literally came up to Susie and began talking about their grandpa

Roy nearly short circuted

So he has a crush on the sister of the kid he was bullying..

After that meeting, he instantly began to be nicer to Pump...like alot nicer

Ross and Robert thought Roy was sick or something

They're right, but not in the way they think

Roy ended up ranting about Susie to them, how much he really thinks she's cute and how he wants to talk to her

And that cleared it up for the two boys

"I can't help it man, she just looks super pretty"

"And you sound like your crushing on her"

"I'm what?"

Ross and Robert are constantly in Roy's corner, but they do secretly tease him

Roy slowly gained confidence from the back up from Ross and Robert

So with that confidence, he began to actually hang out more with Susie

They even became friends

One day, Roy finally manned up and wanted to confess to her

And it goes a little something like this ( Yfm fans please get the reference lmao )

Roy gulped as he started to walk to the brown haired girl. He tried to not be nervous, but it was like telling a fish not to swim. Impossible. He tapped Susie on the shoulder, getting her attention. The taller girl turned around, a clearly nervous Roy greeting her.

"Oh, hey Roy! What's up?" Roy's head nearly went blank. "Uhm- Hey" Susie tilted her head. She never seen him this nervous before. But what made him this nervous?

Roy sighed and decided that he might as well confess now than never. "So, you know how we're...friends?" Susie nodded, wondering what he is trying to get at.

"Yea? Why? Do you not want to be friends anymore?" Susie asked, a little nervous if that was the case. "No no no! No, I love being friends. Its just..."

Roy looked down at his shoes. "I think I like you much more than a friend" Roy admitted. He had his eyes closed, expecting anything and everything negative.

Susie's cheeks turned pink. Well it was a lot better than being told what she previously thought.

"Roy. Its okay" She started. "If anything, your not alone on this" Roy looked back up, seeing a blushful Susie. Her cheeks were pink and her smile was warm and genuine. "A-Are you serious?"

Susie nodded, chuckling a little. "Heh, yeah. I thought it would of been a little obvious by now" It felt like a weight was lifted off Roy's chest.

Without thinking, Roy instantly hugged Susie. Susie was startled a little, but she laughed at his response. Her chin rested on Roy's head and she tried to hug him back to the best of her ability.

So now for the actual headcanons

Roy short. Susie tall. Height difference.

Roy is more boyish. Susie is alot more feminine. Also opposites attract.

Roy would definitely just play tf outta Susie's hair

Just constantly brushing and styling and just touching her hair

Susie doesn't mind. She finds it adorable if anything

Roy invites her to hang out with the hatzgang if she's okay with it

He kinda wants her to join but he feels as if he's going to be teased for it

Spoiler, he wouldn't get teased

Nonetheless, he did give her one of his caps which she wears all the time

Susie is super sweet to Roy

Tbh I think she's the only one who made Roy genuinely shy

And honestly Shy Roy is adorable

They would totally share milkshakes or slushies together

Roy likes to join her streams and is constantly supporting her

They would definitely vent about their homelife. Honestly why wouldn't they?

Roy has the uncle situation, a constantly working mom, and a dad who's barely there for life

Susie has parents that are somewhere other than home and lives with her brother that constantly puts himself at risk and a grandpa who could collapse at any moment

Yknow family trauma 🥰

But fr tho, they do end up feeling better after talking about their issues

Even though Susie has made Roy a nicer person, Roy is still a little shit

What I mean by that is he loves to tease and joke with her

Basically doing things like pulling harmless pranks and teasing her for stupid stuff

Nothing to make her mad mad, just enough to make her annoyed

He does it out of love...and being a little jerkface

Susie likes to make little drawings of whatever and just giving them to Roy

Just seeing Roy open up a little piece of paper with a cartoon devil she drew and smiling about it makes her heart skip a beat

Honestly they should just be canon

[arcorin]

@love-has-a-way-ofgrowingbackward i ended up making a post because i felt like i wrote way too much and it would be unreadable in dm 😅 (this is @lucian-evander btw )

Ok that's the moment i realise i haven't noted anything and so aren't 100% sure about the timeline 😅

So i had my first injection of 0,4 ml of androtardyl (250mg/ 1ml ) february 6th and stayed on that dosage every 4 weeks until half may, my doctor made me do a whole check up beforehand like my blood levels and hormones levels to check there weren't any contraindications.

The things that changed : First thing that happened is bottom growth in the first few days like right the day after my first injection, it was not uncomfortable just something i was aware of specially the few first days i think it stopped growing like maybe two weeks after ? It was something i was scared of because like i've read about the uncomfort and wasn't really something i wanted in the first place but i was actually ok with it when it happened and idk if it makes sense but it felt natural (i kinda thought the concept was weird before tbh). I didn't really feel anything else until the first month (which made me paranoid af about if my injection happened btw like a part of me was surprised i didn't feel the t running in my veins i guess 😂🤦🏻‍♂️ ) and then got like 4/5 days of hot flashes during the nights which were incredibly annoying ngl but then it passed (kinda like people going through menopause) . Also gained some belly weight at this point which surprised me because weight redistribution isn't supposed to happen that fast and my chest got more saggy, got used to it now but i kinda freaked out by how fast it changed . Oh also my skin was super dry at this point that was not the best part . At one month the acne went back i had a lot of it during the first puberty and kinda expected it, just the first time my skin was super oily and this time it's super dry but kinda grainy and testosterone is supposed to do the contrary ? At this point my hairline started changing but like not the front recessing i saw everyone talking about but hair growing on the back sides ? Which is something i did not expect at all. Hair also was growing on the tights and knees (the rest of my legs were already hairy af so it didn't make much difference) which was something that took place in the 2/3 months on t too . Some fuzz on the face too starting by the sideburns and the chin (it's stills not much even now ) the mustache kinda darkened i think . 2/3 months on t i noticed i was less physically tired than before and working out was easier oh also my veins became more visible . My voice dropped (a little ) then too, i hear the difference more when i sing than when i talk tbh i think it's because i didn't really changed the way i talk and usually talks more with a head voice but now i can go way more in the low tones if i want to . Oh also at 3 months my adam apple was noticeable which is something i didn't know i would be so happy about (not me totally playing with it h24 ) , btw my neck is larger now i think same as my shoulders (my binders became too small and I didn't think of that 😭) and my face is more angular? That's something that happened very slowly . I changed my dosage to 0,3 every two weeks in may (no important reasons for the time change it was just so i could sync my injections with a friend , i learned to do them myself at this point and kinda proud of it, oh btw it hurts less than doing blood tests like it varies from one shoot to another but i didn't even feel the first one by example ) . After 3 months i didn't really feel big changes as much , arm muscles kept growing , acne is still there, some more hair is slowly growing on my shoulders, chest and arms , i guess my voice is still dropping a little and facial hair is slowing growing too i mean it's supposed to take time anyway so i'm ok with that (i also stopped looking for changes everyday in the mirror like i did the first months 😂) . I did a blood test every 3 months to check my level of red blood cells and other blood checks and they were good so i think i'll high up my dosage to 0,4 every two weeks .

For the things i have no idea if they changed or not : the mental part (i was really scared of that ) well i can't really tell you because i'm not someone very emotionally stable in the first place and these last months have been absolutely crazy for reasons unrelated to hormones so i really have no idea what's related to it or not since i can't really know how it would have been if i wasn't on t you know ? i just can say it's been a month i've been back to exactly in the same place emotionally as i was like last October so i don't think hrt plays much of a role in that . Also totally unrelated but sweat is supposed to change of smell but since i started to shower three more times than before due to uuuh being touch starved and trying to boil myself i'm actually less smelly than before so idk if it changed

Now for the stuff that didn't change (and i expected it that way) : i know people said it changed their capacity to cry it didn't change anything for me but like i already cried like maybe once a year so yeah . I didn't change my diet i just was more hungry the 2/3 first months then it went back to normal . No increased sweating but then again i already sweated a lot before . No libido increase same reason than the last one

For the weird stuff that was supposed to be the contrary : so before i used to feel constantly too hot and my body was always boiling like it could be 2° outside and i would be in t-shirt complaining about how it was too hot and my trans friends used to tease me about how when i'll be on t i'll just combust because it's supposed to make you even less sensitive to the cold (in the contrary of the oestrogens) but like now for the first time in my life i actually feel normally the weather ? Like i'm cold when it's cold ? And my body temperature became moderated ? Very wtf

Anyway now i'm 6 months on t and i don't regret it and i got used to the changes i didn't like at first and the most annoying part like hot flashes and too dry skin are over so that's good . I was scared of changes in themselves even the ones i wanted before starting it before well i struggle with changes in general but most of them happened gradually enough (btw if you want to slow down changes you can just low dose and increase it very slowly kinda like it would do in a cis puberty )

I probably forgot some stuff so if you have specific questions please ask, i'm ok with answering to pretty much anything .

[bugbuoyx]

Hey, I'm not sure if you're the right person to ask bc idk if you feel the same as me, but - did the changes to your body from T make you feel more and more like yourself when you look in the mirror, like you fundamentally changed? Or did it always feel like you, but T just modified your physical form to be more comfortable? I'm seriously considering T but I'm scared that I'll become a man who I don't recognise in the mirror - that instead of being a modified version of me, I won't be myself any more

I had to think about this one hence the late reply! (also I slept all day) I'll be real with you, I don't think theres a single trans person who hasn't thought this. Who hasn't thought who will I be after this? Hormones and surgery are all big life changes.

First off, You will change, change and growth are inevitable. You are not the same person you were even a year ago. T is just another stage of life and you may become someone a younger you wouldn't recognize but that isn't a bad thing. To answer your question in more detail though:

Generally, the changes happen pretty slowly so you have time to adjust to them. For me, I feel like I am a different person post-T but in a good way. Changes I didn't expect or initially like (weight gain) I now love. I think in general I still look similar, I have had people who haven't seen me since going on T recognize me. You also have a wide variety of options if you don't like particular features, such as shaving and styling.

I don't know that I became more comfortable with my body post-T, I've always been pretty apathetic towards it as a whole like it didn't bother me except for my chest (so top surgery did make me more comfortable!) I am definitely happier and more interested in it, but I am also older and don't feel the need to adhere to beauty standards, quite the opposite tbh.

If you want to compare me pre t, early t and late t (5 years) here's a post I made comparing them! You can see I changed alot but like I said, I'm still me.

[menalez]

Idk if this is something welcome to say. If not, please delete and do not worry about it. 🌹

My experience as a teenager with sex was similar. I have come to call it nonconsensual through feeling unable to say no, with verbal OK but no desire.... only enduring something horrible I thought I had to endure... which people seem to get more. Also it makes me feel calmer? To see all the pressure for what it was and call the fear, if “anyone” my assaulter in that situation. Otherwise nobody understands and will minimize it and also I almost feel like I don’t understand myself either. Though like you I can’t hold the boy to be a rapist I can hold him to be unaware of all the frankly obvious signs of my distress. I have considered if this was willing “unawareness” and I would not put it past men but in this case no, i think it was real. But it was superhuman to put it one way... beyond the natural how unaware men get. Not a coincidence, not a bug, a feature of male supremacy. Not something he chose but something he didn’t at that point manage to see and opt out of. Same for myself and the pressures on me at that time. Though our abilities to question and not expect immediate violence were of course, unequal.

Regardless of how it is said or any detail someone could think they need to scrutinize (which, can that please not be considered acceptable? To those who would argue, please examine what we lose vs what we gain by having the expectación... expect society weight of coercion as the norm for those uncomfortable attesting in specific) I mourn for the freedom we should have had. I don’t know how else to say that so hopefully it makes sense

I am glad you are well and have good company with your gf ...!! To end with the good 💗

yeah tbh sometimes i do look back at it and i feel quite baffled bc i dont think its that hard to tell that i didn't want it. i was deeply traumatised and often acting out bc of that, and i was visibly distressed literally every time afterwards. there was also a clear pattern where id harm myself or attempt suicide after it would happen. but at the same time i feel bad bc he wasn't a horrible person, he definitely is shitty in many ways (like he was prosecuted for posession of child porn and he had these excuses for it back then but then i learned his version of the story isnt the truth bc its just not how things work; or his fetishising my age regression which is a common response to CSA, or the fact that the relationship was causing me visible distress & id keep trying to leave and hed refuse. even after i came out he tried to convince me that he could change my sexuality etc etc etc) but he wasn't the worst person i had come across. back then i had practically no one, most of my friends left bahrain by then bc of the arab spring and the ones that were still in bahrain were fake friends who turned against me once my rape became common knowledge and i became the laughing stock & school whore bc of it. and at that time he was one of the only people who opposed my rapist and would defend me from him, since we were all at the same school. i felt indebted and thankful and i knew he wanted to be w me bc he had been obsessed with me for years at that point so i was just thinking.. well my boundaries are meaningless and what i want means nothing and if i say yes then im reclaiming my body and empowering myself somehow and hes nice to me & everyone has been calling me stupid for repeatedly rejecting him sooo i should just go for it. i had such a weird mix of emotions bc i was scared, i was trying to regain my power, i felt obligated, and i was also appreciative. i think if i had said no, he wouldn't have done anything but maybe hed try to convince me to change my mind, but i cant imagine myself saying no back then tbh. there were just too many factors playing into it. i think had i not been raped at all, things would've turned out extremely different for me and none of that 'relationship' would've have happened at all but..... it did happen and im still trying to make sense of it all. either way it doesnt feel right framing it as if it wasnt consensual. and esp when even while i say it was consensual, people online already try to pick apart my story and try to reframe it as if it was enthusiastic consent and like i victimised him somehow and will take bits of what i said a decade ago to argue that im lying now that im out of that situation and more mentally healthy & aware. makes me feel like even being open about my story is somehow a bad thing yanno

[nad-zeta]

Match up! (*^_^*)

Hello! Thank you so much for taking the time to do these. I’d love to get an ikesen match-up please? I’m a 5’8 female (INTJ, scorpio), who’s body type is athletic and curvy. I tend to describe myself as sturdy. I have long brown hair that reaches my tailbone, with several ear piercings. I am currently a Master’s student studying marine biology, but my aspirations go far beyond this. My goal for a career is to be a research and field leader at a research institute studying marine life. I want to spend all my time in the field first hand leading the expeditions. I’m especially drawn to the ocean, coral reefs and killer whales, I most of all want to work in the Antarctic one day. Aside from my love of animals, my interests include learning about science and biology, building and engineering new things, outdoor activities (off-roading, fishing, hiking, camping), sports, and my one creative skill is writing fiction. I’ve been active my whole life and if things had gone a little differently I would have wanted to be a professional athlete. My favorite sports are alpine skiing, scuba diving, ice hockey, running, and underwater hockey. It takes me a long while to open up to people, which means I tend to only have a few close friends. However in the workplace setting I am very confident and I’m not afraid to speak up. I’ve had people tell me that I’m intimidating, and that my presence can have a great influence on the mood of a room/small group. But I’ve also had friends tell me I’m extremely chill, and never make anything a big deal. I see myself as very highly ambitious and the type of person that knows what she wants and how she’s going to get it. I know what I like and dislike, and I’ve grown past the fear of having people dislike me. I’m a pretty independent person. However, when I’m with my friends I am very much a joker, I love to make people laugh, and act silly. With only the closest of friends the chaotic energy comes out lol. My humor can range from immature to pretty dark. But I really need to know the people I’m around first; otherwise I tend to just go back into my shell. I can read people pretty well, which means I’ll usually try to make them feel more comfortable than myself in situations. This has led me to sometimes feel a little put out. I tend to go wherever, whenever I please. If I plan a trip, I’m going for a good time and don’t really need any schedules. I guess to end it all I’d say I’m very much the type of person that sees all the potential the world has, and all the potential I have to make a difference. Yes this can be hard and painstakingly difficult, but I won’t ever stop striving to meet the expectations and standards I place on myself. I will only keep going, learning more skills, going on more adventures, and seeking new horizons. Thanks again for taking the time to do these!! :) Sorry this turned out so long lmaoo - From Admit Terra (The second one running the blog)

Hi, hi, dear! ❤🌻Thank you so much for the request love! 🦊Hehe, you sound like a super cool person, lol master students unite!🙌🌻 Sorry for taking so long with this! Hope you enjoy this, dear, and I hope you have the best day❤😊! @sengoku-revolution​ admin Terra! lol tomorrow i’ll post admin Maru’s matchup!❤🌻

So I match you with…………… Yukimura

You were on campus attending a conference on marine biology that could greatly help you with your masters. The conference was incredibly interesting and ran late, only finishing around 10pm. As you and the other students and professionals in the field of marine biology, exited the giant lecture hall, you looked up at the sky and saw a flash of lightning blazing across the sky. You regretted walking to campus at that the moment, wishing you had rather driven, as you could tell by the heavy sky that soon it was going to rain cats and dogs. You quickly made your way back to the main campus gate, luckily you didn't live to far away. A drop of rain hit your nose and then another. You debated taking shelter from the storm in your department’s computer room, at least then you could chart down all the new knowledge you had gained from the conference. 

That’s when you spotted a fellow post-grad student. You looked up at the sky once more and noticed that the lighting was going to strike the exact spot that the student was standing in. You ran and pushed him out the way. You braced yourself for impact but it never came, instead you started feeling dizzy and disoriented. Reality around you warped in a cloud of smoke. 

When things came back into focus again, you noticed the man in the lab coat was gone, and you were now standing on the balcony of a burning building. You peered through the smoke to see a man peacefully sleeping on the floor. Unaware of the imminent doom of his downfall. You thought you might have been trapped in a dream, but the heat radiating from the flames brought your straight back to reality. Thank goodness for your physical strength, as you easily managed to wake up and carry the man out of the burning building. The man you had saved was incredibly intimidating and had the same look in his eyes that a shark would have right before it attacks, so you decided to bolt. 

You ran and ran and ran through the forest, and soon your feet lost contact with the ground. You looked down and saw that you had almost run yourself off the edge of a cliff. Thanks to Yukimura’s quick reflexes, he managed to grab hold of your waist and save you from running yourself off the mountainside. He still holding onto you, as he took a few steps back to ensure both you were safe before letting go. You stared up at the man in disbelief, just where the hell were you. That’s when a familiar figure caught your attention. The man you had just saved from being hit by lighting! Sasuke took you aside and started to explain the situation to you, you honestly needed to sit down as it was a lot to take in.

Sasuke looked over at a beautiful blond man that reminded you of a snow prince and asked if you could stay with them. The man narrowed his icy eyes at you and gave a quick nod, before climbing on his horse and signaling to the rest of the men that it was time to go. Sasuke helped you up onto the horse, and that is how your new life in Kasugayama started.

You were someone who couldn’t sit still and always need to be doing something, so you opted to help out around the castle to earn your keep. Even though you were a little shy and reserved, you managed to fit right in with the people of Kasugayama. You were a little surprised at the mixed bag of men that you landed up with, as usual, it would take you quite a while to open up and come out of your shell, especially when meeting new people. But for some reason, they seemed to make you feel comfortable, and you found your self coming out of your shell and befriending them pretty quickly. You especially took a liking to Sasuke. 

Sasuke was the one who formally introduced you to his Bff and your rescuer, Yukimura. This boy was definitely rough around the edges and did not have a way with words, unlike his flirty lord.

You were low key thankful for your ability to quickly read and sum up people as you quickly came to realize that Yuki wasn't such a bad guy. Although he seemed to think it funny to call you a wild boar woman. Even though he was slightly awkward with his words, you found yourself strangely attracted to him. He was down to earth and easy to talk to, and you found yourself relaxing around him.

“Hey dummy how many times do I have to tell you I ain’t no wild boar, call me that again and i’ll smack you,” you playfully quipped. Since arriving in the past, you had grown closer and closer to the aloof man. The two of you would banter every time you were together. “Awww common, you are definitely a wild boar, I mean you are just as strong, sturdy and athletic as one.” He would say with that mischievous boyish smile. At that you simply put Yuki in a headlock and started giving him a nuggie. He then started tickling you, which usually ended in a tickling/wrestling match between the two of you. Yuki’s wolf pup would usually get in on these playful fights that the two of you often engage in, and start licking the two of you mercilessly until both, you and Yuki are left laying on the floor breathless from laughter.

You loved that Yuki like you, loved staying active and going on adventures. And TBH Yuki was thrilled that he finally had a friend that he could go on fun adventures with. Sasuke would usually be too busy looking after Kenshin or doing research, to join in on these adventures. Not that either of you minded as you loved hanging out with each other. The second you found out that Yuki would run to stay fit every morning, you were ecstatic and joined him on his morning runs. This boy was shook! He legit has never met a woman that could keep up with him, yet here you were almost outrunning him. After your morning runs the two of you would always get breakfast together before starting your duties for the day! This is something the two of you did and looked forward to, almost every single day.

When the two of you were together, the banter and jokes were real. You loved to be a bit of a joker around Yuki. You honestly adored the way he would laugh with his whole body and go super red all the way to the tips of his ears, whenever you cracked a joke. 

Speaking of laughing, you also had this crazy ability to instantly lift the mood in any room you walked into. Especially when it came to cheering Yuki up. As you see, Yuki has a tendency to take on more responsibility than he can handle and sometimes he gets crushed under the weight of it. But since you arrived, Yuki felt like he could do anything and take on the world cause you were right there by his side making some silly jokes and teaching him not to take things so seriously. You were the one that taught him to take occasional breaks and to relax, and that the world wouldn't fall apart if he wasn't working. 

Lately Yuki had noticed that you were low on energy and not as bright and chaotic as usual. He also noticed that your jokes were a bit more, morbid as of late. He was determined to cheer up his dearest friend, after all, if you were happy then so was he. He stomped his way into your room and saw you sketching something. “Oi, boar woman what’s wrong, and don’t try and lie to me dummy, cause everyone has noticed that you have been down lately.” You looked up at the clumsy man and smiled, telling him it was a long story. He then narrowed his eyes and left it at that, although the picture you were sketching of the ocean certainly didn’t go unnoticed. 

The next morning at the crack of down, Yuki dragged you out of bed to go on an adventure with him. You were super excited, these little adventures weren’t uncommon.  

If the two of you weren’t off hiking up some crazy mountain, or fishing, you were camping with him in enemy territory as he spied on the Oda forces. Of course, it wasn’t all work as the two of you would go wherever the wind took you. Once Yuki was done with his spy work, he would send off his report back to Shingen, leaving the two of you without a strict schedule to follow, with all the time in the world to explore and experience your surroundings.

You noticed that the two of you were heading closer and closer to the ocean. Your eyes glimmered in delight when you realized that the two of you were going to spend the day on the beach. You wasted no time at all, climbing off the horse and running into your beloved ocean. The two of you played in the waves for hours on end. At some point, Yuki even fished out and handed you a pair of makeshift scuba diving gear. After a long day of playing in the waves and observing the ocean life in the crystal clear water, you and Yuki sat on the beach and watched the sunset. “Hey dummy sit in front of me, I’ll dry your hair for you. Can’t have you getting sick,” you wouldn’t usually let someone dry your hair for you. Still, he looked so cute with that blush spreading across his face, that you couldn’t help but comply. As Yuki dried your long beautiful hair, the two of you started talking. 

You thanked Yuki for taking you on this fun breach adventure and told him all about your dream of becoming a field leader at a research institute studying marine life, as well as wanting to be the one leading the field expeditions. To say Yuki didn’t know anything about marine life would be an understatement, but the way you passionately talked about your dreams and ambitions had him straight up inspired. You told him all about how you were drawn to the ocean and coral reefs and that you wanted to work in Antarctica one day. He never told you this, but as you talked about your dreams of travel and research, he couldn’t help but make a silent vow in his heart to do whatever it takes to support and make your dreams come true.

In the weeks to follow you and Yuki spent more and more time together. Yuki was falling deeper and deeper in love with you, every moment the two of you spent together, and he was determined to tell you how he felt. 

The weather started getting colder and colder, and soon it started snowing. He remembered from previous conversations that you loved ice hockey and alpine skiing (not that he knew what any of that meant). Hence, he decided to ask Sasuke for help in gathering everything he needed so that the two of you could play your favourite sports together. He had all his friends dress up and had Sasuke teach them all the rules of ice hockey. When all his friends were in position, he went to your room and said he had a surprise for you. He then put a blindfold over your eyes and led you downstairs. When he removed the blindfold all your Kasugayama friends stood before you, each holding up a letter that combined spelled out, “I Love you.” You were so happy and touched by the gesture that you couldn’t help but grab Yuki and plant a kiss on his lips right in front of all your friends. Cheers erupted as Yuki grabbed your hand, as you parted and led you onto the makeshift ice hockey-field. 

The next day Yuki surprised you with alpine skiing down a mountainside. You honestly loved this goofball so much, and you couldn’t help but smile and shower his face with kisses whenever he would surprise you with your favourite activities.

Yuki honestly loved and adored everything about you from your chilled personality to your ability to brighten any-room you walk in. In between the war and battles, Yuki was always sure to make time to go on fun, crazy adventures with you, to explore new horizons. After he and Shingen finally managed to win back their homeland, ultimately achieving Yuki’s childhood dream. Yuki had one more surprise for you, and that was a trip back to the future so you could pursue your dreams. 

The two of you travelled around the modern world, and you achieved your dream of leading research and travelling to Antarctica. And Yuki was right by your side through it all, supporting you the best he could. 

Often the two of you cuties could be found on some crazy adventure, cuddled in each other’s arms and enjoying making new memories and living through new experiences together.

If the two of you aren’t being active and playing sports, you are spending a quiet evening at home watching tv and resting in each other’s arms. 

Yuki loves holding you tight in his arms as he pulls his finger through those long beautiful locks. He loves to nuzzle his nose into your neck and leave sweet little kisses on your neck and cheeks as you read your newest piece of fiction to him. 

Together the two of you continue to learn and grow while making the world a better place.

Other potential matches……………. Masamune 

I hope you enjoyed this dear and I hope you have the best day! ❤🌻🙌