#Talirn

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He turned himself into a bulette, funniest thing i’ve ever seen.

So the band of clowns kept going in the mountain after being assaulted by big cats. They kept making their way through the pile of sharp stuff until they take a short rest in a small blasted heath. Then a harpy killed Zephyr’s bird, so that was rude. They managed to sneak past the harpies and reached an inland pool of rainwater, they decided to stay the night there and ignore the health hazard taht is drinking stagnant water, fortunately they all made their con save so no brain eating amoeba for them. 

They notice a giant fuck off red dragon wyvern on another peak, tho it seems to not have noticed them. The next day, the wyvern was nowhere to be seen, so they kept going through the twisting and winding paths of jagged stones.

WILD MAGIC TIME. An earth elemental appeared and made a path through the rock so that’s nice. Unfortunately, as much as the chasm dug by that earth elemental dug is helpful, it is not stable, so it collapsed, no adventurer was harmed in the collapse of the tunnel, tho it did attract a smaller wyvern which they managed to not be noticed so onward.

After a while, they start becoming desperate, having to climb another peak, so Talirn makes a deal with the sword again, turning himself into a bulette for the low low cost of 2 points of exhaustion and no info on what the contract entailed.

So Talirn is now a Bulette, his intelligence is 2. Fortunately they managed to convince Bulirne to dig a tunnel through the last peak. It goes well for about 500 ft before he runs into another Bulette and start fighting, which would have been fine if not for...

WILD MAGIC TIME: Bulirne is teleported at the start of the tunnel, completely disoriented. So it’s team no name - 1 VS an angry bulette in it’s element. The 2 casters go down before Zero does what Zero does and kills it. It’s around that time that the entire tunnel Bulirn dug started to shake and collapse...

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finna chronic my player's endeavors here since its the one place they won't find me

so the players;

-Talirn von Hennerach, human, warlock 6 (hexblade), pact of the tome, scrawny white boy, rich kid who found a freaky sword and decided leaving the family home during the night and telling nobody was somehow a great way to learn about the sword.

-Prudence Castillo, tiefling, rogue 6 (inquisitive), has exactly 1 braincell and uses it to dump lore she learned in school, awful at art but tries her best, she also left home without telling anyone to go have fun.

-Zero Orez, satyr, blood hunter 6, order of the lycan, a short king with a foul mouth, he looks tough but loves his pets and siblings even if they dont love him back, curse magnet and walking amnesia trope.

-Acchak Zroke, Mork (like an orc but red), bard 3 (valor) warlock 3 (fiend), huge himbo, does his best to help the rogue in her artistic endeavors, just trying to have a good time, one of the only 2 adults of the group.

-Zephyr Delvaux, kalashtar, Wizard 6 (illusion), anxiety ridden nerd and the mom™️, loves her little fox Neeko and feels responsible for the gaggle of kids who teleported in her basement one day.

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Last time on campaign A...

so hum, Prudence is fucking dead (and also Loeta). What are they gonna do now ?????? Well, they had a scroll of raise dead ! But there is 2 bodies, and Acchak is the only one who can cast the spell with his -1 arcana...

Kevin pipes up, saying one of his friend can duplicate the spell for a small fee, but to bring him, they would need to use another scroll they have on them, Infernal Calling, Talirn, after long debate, desides to summon the damn thing, but after a minute of casting and even saying the true name of the devil during the casting of the spell, he misses the DC by 1 (rolled a 14, DC 15).

Distraught, Kevin sulks and goes back in the backpack.

Acchak then decides to just go for it and cast Raise dead on Prudence and ALSO misses the DC by 1, fuckeling heck.

The seer’s parlor being open, they decide to ask for help there, because maybe a mysterious woman who cna open demiplanes and read fate with cards can maybe raise people from the dead, right ?

Turns out she can ! tho she has to roll for it and if she fails, the body she’s trying to resurrect is obliterated. They try prudence. It looks like it work, but then a blinding light comes from the ceiling, blinding everyone, when the light disappears, nothing is left of prudence appart from a burn mark on the ground.

During this whole time, Charybdis (Talirn’s funky sword) kept saying they could resurrect someone with a 100% chance of success, which was generally drowned out by the protesstations of the seer who couldn’t say much about what she knew because of an NDA she and the sword signed.

What Charybdis didn’t say at first is that beaconing a soul back to their body will give away their position to the space police and attract more ghosts. Also, Charybdis want something in return, which they managed to negotiate being 1/7th of Talirn’s life. Which means, one day a week, Charybdis will take posession of Talirn’s body.

Finally, after long debate, Talirn relents and, after a failed attempt at resurrescting Prudence (because she got no body), they managed to resurrect Loeta, which was a terribly painful experience for everyone involved.

Everything then settled down for a while until they finally, FINALLY got to Morx island, their intended destination. Arriving to shore (and raiding the room of their previous navigator), they found themselves having to deal with the most awful, vile, and treacherous enemy they ever had to face:

CAPITALISM

Yep, Morx island uses it’s own currency, “Morkbuck”. The conversion rate ? EASY ! 1 morkbuck is equal to 7,65 silver pieces. How will our heroes overcome this deadly foe ? idk, i can’t do math.

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Last time on campaign A

After a long day of doing pretty much nothing, the gang decided to rest for the night at Zephyr’s grandma (lili) house. Gelern and Loeta went to an inn tho.

Zephyr woke up at 3am and spent time with her grandma, talking about spells, using time manipulating rooms to get 6h of work done in 1, the usual.

Later, someone started knocking on the door, aprehensive, lili checked who it was, they didn’t get to see but the person said they wanted to speak specifically to Talirn and Zero.

After much debating they decided to go see the person who was creepily and obviously stalking them, it turned out to be Märshäll, the manager of their old companion Beacon who had been missing. Märshäll wanted Zero and Talirn to provoke attacks from monsters for monetary benefit, to which they agreed. After writing his name in Talirn’s book of shadows, Märshäll proceeded to collapse dead in front of them. A little investigation and a killer perception check later, they arrived at the conclusion that Märshäll was an intellect douverer.

Later that day, they finally got to the docks to get on the boat, Juan Peace the navigator was late and, due to their lingering intellect devourer paranoia, decided to detect thoughts him...which was good because taht wasn’t Juan, that was a guy disguised as Juan who escaped their grasp and disappeared into the crowd.

Now without anyone to drive the boat, it was Kevin the imp’s time to shine, with the killer persuasion of acchak, they got one of the morx to sign a pact with the imp for proficiency in water vehicles. The new navigator “Kleurstoffen” did a quick job at getting them back on track.

Everything seemed well for 2 days until one night, Talirn heard the voice of a familiar pirate cat taunting him, Captain Cav-e Whiskers was on the boat, and she had prepared her own ship, “The Esca”, to emerge from the depht of the ocean right below the party’s ship.

“Roll initiative !” -me

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Yesterday, on campaign A:

Nothing much happened, Zephyr's player wasnt so i explained by her needing to rest her injured back (they fought a lobster, long story).

Zero bought a pie. It's a good pie. Cherry and cinnamon. Doesn't fit in the bug of holding tho.

Talirn reviewed the plan with his brother and sister to crash a wedding, the twins Gelern and Loeta, 15 year old nerds with abandonement issues.

Acchak and Prudence went on a musical adventure where Prudence got a new flute and can now take levels in bard. She then went to church to get a semblance of familiarity, she's never been so far from home before.

They all gotta wait until the next morning to go back on their boat on their way to Morx island in order to crash a wedding. Also Acchak is here as a guide and general musical background.

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I'm a business woman with a business woplan

earSooOoOOooOOOoOoOOOoOo

Last time, our crew got invited to Ajax the lesser’s home because he is a huge fan of his futur brother in law Talirn, Ajax is a sweet, introverted and kind 40 year old, which apparently didn’t stop my players from making him their favorite character ever and wanting nothing bad to arrive to him, neither is the fact that he is about to marry a 17 year old ??????????

Well apparently he’s only doing it to please his mom, the grand matriarch of the Kidnifelür clan and richest woman on this side of Morx island. They all arrive in Ajax’s mom little summer home in a hamlet and introduce themselves to Cookie, Ajax’s mom. Problem: she doesn’t speak a lick of common, only orcish, which only Acchak and Zero speak, so it’s a game of translation between the party and cookie.

The party is led to a spare room with bunk beds where they get to relax, get their bearings and plot their next moves. They settle on Zero trying to seduce/convince Cookie to halt the marriage and let Talirn’s sister go. Ajax heard all of this and wass waiting on the other side of the door to tell them that dinner is ready. In the dining room, around 20 morx are feasting and talking, it’s the close family, a bunch of brothers, sisters, cousins, young, old, and at the head of the table: Cookie, looking pleased to see her family prosper.

The crew sits on the other side of the table, letting Zero alone go and talk to Cookie, while the others watch (including Ajax with whom he switched places with).

The gist of the conversation is

- 1: Zero is too young to date her

- 2: She is interested in Zero’s dad tho

- 3: She is willing to pay for a vegetarian menu for Zero during the reception.

- 4: The Kidnifelür clan used to be a small clan thta was being bossed around until one day, a legendary hero was born in the clan and led them to a safe place where they could thrive and prosper.

- 5: Cookie is hellbent and making the legacy of her ancestor live by making her family thrive and prosper no matter the cost, even if it means deals such as the one she made with Heidra Von Hennerach.

- 6: She dared Zero to stop her.

Defeated, they finish their dinner and go back to their room, dreading the upcoming transformation of Talirn.

Around 11pm, a howl can be heard outside, Talirn being the only one awake, decides to investigate and finds Ajax the lesser on a hill, crying to himself. Lamenting the idea that he’ll make for a poor husband and doesn’t even have an offering for the family, ensues a lore dump about the legendary hero that saved their clan, “Ajax the greater”, and his 2 magical handaxes, one of them: Tűzvarázsló is in the newly built castle as a symbol of the family, the other one, Jégvarázs has been lost to time.

It just so happens that Talirn has a map telling him where Jégvarázs is, but as he’s about to tell Ajax, midnight strikes, and Charybdis takes control.

Ensues a series of violent destruction and arguing that ended in a drinking contest that Ajax won, Charybdis falling in a deep drunken sleep. The rest of the crew goes back to rest and leave behind a very confused Ajax, whom nobody has bothered to explain whatever the fuck just happened.

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Get a room you 4

So last time, the tunnel started collapsing, fortunately, everyone in the party has a method of teleportation. The problem is that an entire chunk of the mountain collapsing is that it attracts unwanted attention, like a bunch of wyverns.

Combat ensues, 3 wyverns, including a beefed up, fire breathing chonker wyvern VS the party - 1 + Bulirn. It is long, Bulirn takes a fire blast point blank, Acchak 1v1 a wyvern and manages to not get hit once, Zephyr thinks it’s a good idea to fireball a fire breathing dragon.

Eventually they kill them all and finally finally get out of Mount Calzarath, arriving at a charming little beach with an empty looking and unfinished castle.

They decide to camp behind a hill away from the beach and figure out how to deal with Bulirn. The next day, the twins have disappeared, construction noise can be heard from the castle and Talirn is still a Bulette, so tough shit. One crowley summoning and scouting later, they find out that someone fitting the description of Vanara, Talirn’s last sibling, is inside the finished tower, but before they deal with that, they need to do something about Bulirn, Mug and Acchak eventually team up to pelt it with spells till he dies, which takes a while. Gooey, naked and covered in blood, Talirn emerges from the entrails of the Bulette, remembering everything that happened. 

All the comossion attracts the attention of the morx workers who notify the owner of the castle, Heidra Von Henerach, Talirn’s father, who proceeds to be a stereotypical member of the bourgeoisie and talk down on everyone in the party, they also learn that Gelern and Loeta got caught and are being scolded and sent back to the continent.

While this is happening, a flying and invisible Zero goes to free Vanara, which goes poorly because she doesn’t want to be saved, they spend the rest of the day bickering. After a brief talk with Talirn, Vanara goes back to her tower, failing to notice the Mork standing away from the group, hands on his eyes.

His name is Ajax the lesser, soft spoken mama’s boy and the famed groom.

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oh shit i forgot the recap: part 2

SO, the party went on goat back towards a giant, jagged deadly mountain, fun stuff. Their rider, Mekhane, is a jolly half elf very far from home, he comes from the most southern part of the main continent, the city of “Freud’merre”. Hesitant to take them, or even get this close to such a dangerous place, he reluctantly accepts when they tell him about their plan.

After a while, they pass a small wood where Trunkos (small furry elephants) are blocking the way, which the group quickly dispaches. They are then left around 1km from the mountain, the sky getting dark and Mekhane needing to get his goat back home. They decide to camp on a small dirt hill, where they can see the vast no man’s land before the mountain. On the horizon, it’s nothing but dirt hills and the looming shadow of the mountain and it’s jagged peaks, like a pile of broken glass, edges jutting from every sides.

At night, a bear finds the camp in an attempt to find food but only finds Mug, Talirn dispose of the beast quickly. They are then attacked by ghosts seemingly lured here by Talirn’s sword, probably coming from the agreement he made with the said sword.

In the morning, they set out to climbing the mountain, to the great dismay of Acchak who was against it since day one. The climb is harduous, there is no path, the terrain is not even, and every ledge can be sharp enough to cut a finger or two. To not help, regularly, bulettes will come out of the ground, making the whole mountain shake and knocking everyone down. 

After a while, they find themselves on a narrow edge, sandwiched between a sharp wall and a large chasme covered in sharp rocks, like a toothy maw. Zephyr is the first to notice that they are being followed, 2 liondrakes have been tailing them since they got to the chasme, after much deliberation, they decide to engage the fight. A hard fight follows where Zero gets constantly stunned due to the liondrake’s roars, Talirn gets downed, and Zephyr is caught by one of the drakes and dangled above the Chasm. Eventually, with a quick stab of his sword, helped by wyvern venom, Talirn manages to dispatch one of the monsters, while Mug fries the other with a Ball of Chaos (random damage type fireball).

Their journey is not over, as it has only been half a day and they are nowhere near the end of the plateau. And somewhere looms the “god of the mountain”, a fabled dragon that terrorizes Mount Calzarath’s denizens and everyone around it.

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oH SHIT i forgor to make recaps for the last 2 sessions, here you go. (part 1)

After resurrecting Loeta and failing to resurrect Prudence (Prudence’s player has to step off for a while because of college, they will be back tho :wink: ), they all go back to sleep, exhausted.

Tou their surprise, in the morning, they are greeted by a view of the shores of Morx island, the Esca having displaced their boat a great deal during the fight. Arriving in the evening, captialistic shenanigans ensue before they settle down for the night at “The creeping vine”, a less frequented inn that Acchak knows, claiming that the popular ones are “tourist traps”.

In the morning, everyone is well rested and they almost forget about the recent and gruseome death of their close friend. Gelern and Loeta are training in the hallway and the gang is eating breakfast, everythjing is calm... Until something starts rumbling inside Acchak’s bag.

Out of the bag, a kobold jumps out, completely panicked. Introducing: Mug, Kobold, Wild magic sorcerer (level 6) and walking doomsday clock. Everyone, including Mug, is incredibly confused about what is going on and where is this child coming from (Mug is 2 years old), a lot of shenanigans and wild magic ensue.

Talirn manages to convince Mug to chill and help them stop the wedding in exchange of “all the candy he could ever ask”, which Mug agrees to. Together, they sail off to take one of the many giant 8 legged goats that roam the streets, serving as public transport. They finally enter the last stretch of their journey, which will see them travers the dangerous Mount Calzarath.

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Tonight’s teh night they try to resurrect Prudence and Loeta

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TW: child death, violence

Last time on campaign A

HOO BOY, a lot happened last time, the entire fight agaist captain whiskers and the crew of the Esca was jam packed with stuff happening, so, i’m gonna go character by character and describe how the fight went for them.

Zephyr. Poor Zephyr, she had to witness so much violence, she was still on the ship when the Esca (captain Cav-e Whisker’s boat) appeared, she mainly threw mind whips away, which was very helpful, as well as wieping an entire squadron of sea spawns in one hit with a well placed and very angry fireball. She also stabilised Zero when has was at 2 failed death saves while being threatened by a Kraken priest !

Zero. Honestly the MVP of the fight, singlehandedly destroyed half the ennemies with his ice sword Celestine, leaving ice statues behind him, he learned that his mimic armor acted like a symbiote, in that it can act as a 3rd arm, lets him use items as a bonus action, and defends him when he is unconscious. While unconscious, he had a dream about a strangely familiar unicorn, maybe connected to his clamis of being native to the feywild ? After petting the unicorn for a while, he gets the sens that this won’t last long, before being stabilized by Zephyr.

Acchak. The overworked dad and only healer of the group, he is responsible for preventing 90% of all death and was stretched thin this fight. Assaulted on all sides, his shield of scream (a shield that screams and deals psychic damage when blocking an attack) was a useful asset when it comes to chipping away at the enemy. Unfortunately he got pinned down by a puffer fish man and almost died, Kevin doing his best to defend him, finding very little success doing so.

Talirn. The main event, Talirn took upon himself to grab the attention of captain whiskers so that she wouldn’t hurt anyone else, to a varying degree of success. He got beat up bad, fell unconscious twice before being healed by Acchak, he sacrificed his staff of fire to kill the giant mantis shrimp that was menacing the party by breaking it and throwing it like a javelin, making the beast explode on impact. During his states of unconsciousness, he found himself in a black abyss, in between a dull purple light slowly growing, and a constellation of stars in the shape of a hooded person, before he could choose one of them, Acchak healed him back to consciousness.

The twins. Talirn’s younger siblings Gelern and Loeta played an important role in this fight (Talirn’s player was in control of them). Hiding and terriyfied for most of the fight, Gelern hit some great shots, however, he really came into his own when he cleaning up low health ennemies, including landing the finishing shot on captain whiskers who was about to execute his brother However, the distress of Gelern was mainly because of Loeta, who, after pummeling a Kraken priest for a while, got shot in the back 3 times by captain whisker’s eldritch blast, killing her instantly. After the battle, Talirn went to pick up his little sister’s body, doing his best to prevent Gelern from seeing the state of his twin sister. However, this was not the only casualty...

Prudence. Things didn’t start well with prudence, she got poisoned by the pufferfish man early on and it took a long time for the poison to wear off. With her high ground, she had a great ventage point to pick off ennemies, however, wanting to protect her unconscious friends, she jumped towards talirn to help, before rushing away towards a then still bleeding Zero, trying to divert danger from them, she called out to the giant mantis shrimp to make herself teh target instead of the others. She had been pummeled by it before and was sitting on 1hp after rolling a 20 on a death save. She threw a dagger at a priest that was attacking Zero, which ended up killing him, but, here’s the thing...

Prudence’s dagger is magical, it’s called Jackpot, it’s a +1 dagger, generates 1gp per day and crits on a 7 or a 20. The thing is, she got it further enchanted by her friend Mheurre Linne the enchantor, he made is so when thrown, the dagger comes back, but there is a 5% chance it damages her when catching it back, this had never happened before. She was at 1 hp, she dropped instantly, then the shrimp arrived and beat her to a pulp, she had no chance, it was hard for them to even gather what was left of her in once piece.

So that was a pretty brutal session but the players seemed to enjoy it

See you next time.