#THIS MADE ME SMILE SO BIG I FEEL LIKE SPONGEBOB WHEN HE FOUND OUT SQUIDWARD LIKES KRABBY PATTIES

[canongf-archive]

Liv I have to complain (/lh) at you bc you put these triple frontier boys on my dash and now I haven't been able to stop thinking about or looking into Tom and I have to blame you for that /lh

YOU'RE WELCOME WALL !!!!! :-)

it is my JOB to do this kind of thing. and Tom is so GOOD !!! he's like... he's the Leader. he's so smart and talented at what he does and the guys have so much respect for him... he just wants to do the right thing by the people around him!!! and he's BIG and HANDSOME, it's an INCREDIBLE combination!!!!!

if you want me to put in a good word... just lemme know :-)))

[kerenitychan]

this is stupid lol but like , i've been drawing everybody wearing the friendship bracelets so i feel like i owe y'all an explanation as to why the *fuck* squid would be wearing/have made one in the first place. i'm still working of a picture of the gang actually making them but yeah. basically the friendship bracelets act as a "you see this squid? , this is a symbol of you're stuck with us and we have your own permission to kick your butt if you act like a jerk" they don't wear them a lot cus, ya know all them bracelets can be kinda uncomfortable and annoying but they do wear em every now and then especially when they've planned an outing cus friendshippp

" BECAUSE I LIKE YOU! " Squidward heaved , trying to catch the breath he lost in his tantrum as he defeatedly locked eyes with the man before him . Spongebob scoffed. He wasn't even sure anymore when the fight started or what it was about but it sounded like his teal haired opponent was reduced to his last trump card, again. The one he knew would usually defeat the sponge, but not this time. He was so tired of this. " Yeah yeah I know, *hmpf* 'you don't really hate me' even if you regularly remind me. And maybe somewhere deep down you can stand me. I get it Squid you have that revelation twice a year, it's getting old. " He sighed crossing his arms as he tore away his gaze to look at the floor in disappointment whilst the other blinked before reaching out, more in an attempt to materialize answers from thin air then anything else, as he started again, still panicked and frustrated. " H- no! It's not....Agh! Look I don't! UGH  why do you have to make this so DIFFICULT! " " I'M making this difficult!? This ...this-this SHERADE has been going on for 10 years squidward! " Cerulean eyes pierced trough carmine ones with a look of rage, confusion, and frustration as the man threw up his freckled arms in desperation before they slunk back to his sides with a huff of defeat. To which the guilty scowl on the cephalopods face deepened. " Look I-ugh. I was TRYING to say that I like you. Not just that I don't hate you, which I also don't... do? Too many negatives. ANYWAY...I...I uhm....I don't like admitting defeat I- I uh, I guess... ehm an-  and I have a  hard time accepting things sometimes ... and I guess- I guess I just bottle things up until I explode... " He grimaced and looked around, vaguely gesturing . " Which is why we're discussing this stuff at 3 AM in the pattyvault instead of at home like normal people, ...I guess. " Sponge blinked a bit snapping out of it...oh yeah, right, squid was sneaking out and eating patties behind everyone's backs instead of ordering one every now and then like a ding dang normal person because for SOME INSANE REASON  he seems to insist people will ... will... NEPTUNE KNOWS WHAT HE THINKS PEOPLE WILL DO WHEN THEY FIND OUT HE LIKES PATTIES! HE'S JUST BEING SO- SO ARGHHHG! That last grunt escaped it's mental confides and rolled out between the gap of his buckteeth. " I just. I don't get it Squidward you ALWAYS do this. With everything!!! With anything you KNOW is fun!!! With everyone you know you actually like!!!  with....     With me...  Forget it, I'm just gonna...  go count the sesame seeds, I suppose.  Just... Don't fill up on patties until you explode again. " He turned around shaking his head with a sigh to head to his destination, but was brought to a halt by a suction cupped hand wrapping around his wrist " Spongebob wait!" A sigh. A grimace. A deep breath. " I. Am. Sssorry.  There, I said it, I'm sorry! I don't want whatever this is to keep going either! I just.... I am.... I am afraid of change, I guess?  You always say things will be fine but what if they're not???  I'm not lucky like you Sponge!  Destiny always seems to want good things for you but my karma is ATROCIOUS.  KELP! I could land in a hospital just for thinking about my karma! "  " Well then that's even more reason to try!!! Your "karma" wont get better if you don't! " " Ugggghhh I, You- This-  GAH! Can we talk about this some other time!? All I'm gonna get out at this rate  is more nonsensical rambling I'm gonna regret saying because: It's LATE, I'm EXHAUSTED and I STILL haven't     had a darn krabby patty! " " Then just eat the darn thing and get on with it because I'm not letting you chicken out again! "  " Can you at least close the door for a minute and give me some privacy! "  " YOU ARE GOING TO EAT A 🐬ING BURGER,WHAT PRIVACY!? " Oh... wow... a... that was... that was a swear. ....Spongebob just swore. ......uh-oh. Squid's really gotten himself thrown in the deep end now. He gulped nervously before submissively nodding and taking a bite of his burger... oh sweet mother of pearl it was good!  Neptune! Why does he always deprive himself of things he wants so bad?  Oh, right. Because he always has to make a big show of telling everyone that he actually hates the things he likes and he would DIE of mortification if he ended up having to admit defeat like a.... like a loser. With a light shake of his head he brushes off the thoughts and focuses on savoring the taste of his burger... 1 because he really needed one and wants to enjoy it. And 2 because ...ehm... he's a tad scared for what awaits him when he's finished. Spongebob was rarely enraged to the point of screaming,.. to the point of swearing and when he was he was a force to be reckoned with, Squidward knew that much. He peeked over in between bites to see his colleague standing there, arms crossed and impatiently tapping his foot, he was scowling so hard his buckteeth were hidden behind a pout and his eyes were squinted to half their normal size.  " How is it? " It was near impossible to gauge what kind of reaction the blonde wanted by his intonation, he was curt, near emotionless, ... Sarcastic? Squidward gulped down what he was chewing and smiled sheepishly.  " Just as good as I remember...heh. " " Hmmhmm. I bet. " Oh boy. With another awkward chuckle squid finished his burger before taking a deep breath.  " Had your fill? " " Heh, eh y-yeah. I kinda want more but I don't want a repeat of the last time. " " 3 times. " " H-huh? " " you loaded up on patties until you had to be hospitalized THREE TIMES. " The freckled man's gaze got the octopus who normally towered over him shrinking in shame before him. Just a little short of going into a fetal position.

" Why do you do this Squidward? What on earth does karma have to do with you being a stubborn seamule about things until they go horribly wrong!?  You could just order a damn patty every now and then, EVERYBODY loves krabby patties, no one would blame you! But no mr. Tentacles is too good for a krabby patty, mr. Tentacles would rather be miserable until         the kettle boils over and he loses control! " That got a huff out of the other who gathered some courage to stand up straight and glare back. " That mocking mr. Tentacles talk is exactly why! Because I am trying to uphold an image here, and the moment I don't live up to it I know damn well that everybody here will jump on the opportunity to remind me that      I'm just a poser! That I'm not actually the hot shit I pretend I am! That I'm lucky they even tolerate me breathing the same water! That I should feel honored anyone is willing to admit they're acquainted with me! That   I don't actually have any talent! That I'm....that I'm just.... That I'm a nobody! A filthy peasant! A wannabe show-off! That I'm a-a ... a...  That I'm a LOSER.  " Squidward clenched his fists, sniffling trough heavy breaths, he's not sure when it happened but he started crying. Oh Neptune this is humiliating. He feels kinda dizzy, oh please don't ink! This is bad enough as it is! As he looked up defeatedly his eyes met blue ones, glittering from the moisture collecting in them as a scowl made way for a worried frown. Great, somehow sympathy felt worse then rage. " Squidward... " " No, please just...  don't. That's what I meant with 'I'm just going to ramble'. Pretend I didn't say anything. I gah- " He yelped as he suddenly found himself in a tight embrace. Of course. He grunted uncomfortably and squirmed a bit trying to break free from the surprisingly strong hold his normally rather weak companion had. " Sponge I'm serious let's just pretend tha- " " Nu-uh! We, we're done pretending anything! Squid please! Talk to me about these things! " Two watery blue eyes look up at him, accompanied by a deep frown and trembling lip that only deepen the pained feeling in the octopus's chest. " Please. I'm here for you Squidward. " Gahhhh why does he always! Why is this always so! And he just! And, oh blowfish. He's crying again. " That's the damn problem here ! You have Patrick and Sandy and your parents and whatever stupid friends you made in your clubs to fall back on if you mess up! I..... " He sighs and against his better judgements, feels himself lamely hugging back, tiredly resting his chin in fluffy bottle blonde hair as he looks up at nothing. " I can't go to mother, she's not getting any younger and she's worried about me enough as it is, I can't stress her out more....  Father would just tell me to stop being a baby and man up... he'd mean it well but that doesn't mean it's any help. And "friends" I have acquaintances I guess, people I know by name that are willing to say hello to me.... I used to think Eugene was my friend but he's chosen being a boss over being a companion time and time again  so... I only really have only one friend... and he's used to me not treating him as one. So what if.... what if I did make an effort? And he starts expecting things from me, but I start chickening out or relapsing or decide I can't do it after all and he finally gives up on me!? I wouldn't blame him... I would have given up on me years ago... but I'm not sure what I'd do when I end up being completely on my own in this ..." Oh jeez... now Sponge feels bad. Obviously Squid has been struggling with this for a long time, he could tell he'd been struggling with his own happiness ever since he met him really... he pouts and gives his tall friend a comforting squeeze. " Well... have you tried talking to him about it? " A lame chuckle was the response before  he was slightly pushed back so the teal haired man could look at him with an awkward lopsided smile and a shrug. " I'm trying to right now. Heh. " A blink. 'Trying to right now'? Another blink. 'Only one friend that's used to not being treated as one' ? The gears in his spongey head were turning. 'I would have given up on me years ago'? With one more blink the short man started looking around wide eyed before carefully pointing at himself with a trembling hand. " Muh... me? " " No I'm talking about the krabby patty. yes you! Ever since you moved in next door... well before that really, ever since your little weirdo butt started "growing his first house" next-door you've been pestering me day  and night! With your incessant laughter and unconstrained joy and endless creativity and unmatched imagination and- and... and I just... I just... I kinda wish I could have been a part of it...  without having to be the mature adult that's too good for your childish games I guess? " Squid shrugged sadly before his friend released his grip on the hug, to instead take hold of his hands and make determined eye-contact. " You still can be part of it squidward... it's not too late, I told you didn't I? You're one of my best friends, I'll always have your back. You don't have to act a certain way or do specific stuff to be a mature adult you know? I've seen you Happy and exited before.... not as often as I'd like. But that's when you feel most you  when you're in a good mood and forget about who you 'should be ' for a moment.... I want to help you feel like that more often. " A soft sad chuckle left the octopus who shook his head and rubbed his teary eyes with his free hand. " You have no idea what you're getting yourself into. " " I think I've got a pretty good idea. " He chuckled back with a playful look. " Wait hold up I have an idea! " " Huh? What are you doing? " Squid blinked watching his...friend. Yeah, his friend. As he fumbled with something on his wrist before tugging at squid's arm. " Now, I want this one back because Patrick made it for me but that's gonna be our first friendship exercise! " He beamed a shiny bucktooth grin revealing the colorful macrame bracelet he transferred to the other's wrist. " Tomorrow you me and Pat are gonna get together and we're making this friendship official with a 3 people set! Oh maybe we could finally convince sandy to join, she never wants to do crafts with us.  She always says it's boring and starts karate chopping everything." " Wait- hold up, what? Friendship exercise? Official? Crafts? Karate chopping? " " Well yeah! I told you mister! No more pretending anything, we're gonna go out there as friends and you can be tsundere about it all you want but that's final " " I can be what about it???? Wait no never-mind that! Look don't you think you're going a bit fast here???? Do we have to do this, like... now??? And so... publicly???? " " Yesss we dooooooo~ " The blonde singsonged as he playfully flicked the other's nose " No more snail-footing around squidward! You're miserable and as your friend it is my duty to help fix that! So starting tomorrow we're doing this friend thing and you're gonna try or so help me I WILL get the                   ticklebelt! Nyahahahaha! " A sigh turned into a chuckle as Squid shook his head before he erupted in laughter along with his freckled friend... oh boy. What has he gotten himself into now??? " Hawhawhaw! " " Nyahahahaha! " " Hawhawhaw! " " Nyahaha. But seriously, I will. I  know where they keep the spare key to the mermalair. " " Huh? "        

[krreader]

someone you loved | chapter 1.

pairing: park jimin x reader fandom: bts warnings: childhood sweethearts!au ; underage drinking ; language genre: angst ; smut

summary: when you were a little girl you had always assumed that he would be by your side forever, that you would marry him when you’d get older and start your own family when you were ready.. but how many people are actually lucky enough to end up with their childhood sweetheart?

a/n: I know I have a shit ton of originals already, but I’ve been planning this one for MONTHS and finally found the time to finish the first chapter today. let me tell you upfront, this one is going to be angsty as fuck and I doubt there will be much fluff going on for a very long time, so just a heads up. other than that, enjoy this first part ♥ (also, please listen to the song here, I promise you won’t regret it.)

ask box | masterlists | faq | twitter | ko-fi | REQUESTS ARE CLOSED.

Losing sight of the people you used to call your best friends as a child wasn't a rarity.

It literally happened all the time.

In fact, only one in five people are still in touch with their childhood friends when they’re adults.

And if you think about it, it actually makes sense. Unless destiny wanted you to be friends forever, it is completely normal to grow apart. The older you get, the more you change. You develop your own interests, hobbies and think for yourself, that’s just the way of life.

However, when you were a little girl, you had genuinely believed that you had already met the love of your life and would be with him forever..

You had met him in kindergarten, where he walked over to you with his cute suspenders and the most beautiful smile you had ever seen and offered you some of his lunch because some bullies had taken yours away. He had dragged you along and had played all day with you and when you came home that day, instead of crying and telling your mothers about those bullies, you laughed and told her about your future husband.

After that day, you spent literally every single day with him.

He quickly became the only person you ever wanted to play with in kindergarten, but also afterwards.

Your mothers became friends eventually. Were bound to with how often you spent your free time at the other one's place.

Soon after, it was your father's and then it was as if your families were not two, but one big one.

You spent important holidays with each other, went on trips together, had random family dinners..

..and all of that carried on into your teenage years.

Before that, both of you had decided that you wanted to go to the same school, never wanting to lose sight of one another and always wanting to be in the comfort of the other one.

Maybe that had some negatives, because, again, you were both so focused on each other that you barely made friends with anyone else.

You knew that fighting was never an option, if something even remotely close to a fight ever occurred, the other one managed to somehow always fix the situation by cuddling or being funny, so you never had to worry about someday standing there on your own.

Even as you got older and entered the stage of boys suddenly being interesting in a romantic way, nothing really changed between you two.

Yes, you did view each other differently and there were.. moments that probably wouldn't have happened if you were truly 'just friends', but you had your mind set on him being your future husband anyways and from the way he reciprocated the feelings, you had assumed that he felt the same way. You just wanted it to progress naturally..

Some people thought it was weird that you were so close, others thought it was incredibly cute and yet again others were jealous of the connection you two shared.

But you couldn't be bothered. You just lived your life and enjoyed it to the fullest with him by your side.

There were five moments that you still thought about a lot. 

Five moments that changed your relationship forever.

The first was already mentioned, that was the first time you had met each other in kindergarten and you knew you wanted to have him by your side forever.

The second was when you two had to decide which schools you wanted to go to.

According to your teacher, she thought you should go to different schools. Your best friend was a very talented dancer, so she had proposed him to go to a high school that had a really good program for dancers or anyone else that was talented in creative fields.

But it was a high school that you could only go to if you had enough teachers to back you up and while he had it, you didn’t.

You weren't nearly as good as him, so you knew you had no chance of getting into that school.

And so even though you would be heartbroken, you said: “You should go there.. it's an opportunity and.. you always said you wanted to be a dancer. Maybe this could be the way to accomplish that,” when the two of you sat on a hill, watching the sunset.

The thing was, you knew that you could still see him. He would still be only ten minutes away from your home. 

Yes, it would be weird not being in the same class anymore, but you knew you wouldn’t lose him.

He had watched you for a very long time, your hair flying everywhere from all the wind, yet in this moment he thought you were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his life.

He had reached over and had grabbed your hand with a smile.

“I promised I wouldn’t leave you, remember?”

“But..-”

“No, (Y/N). There's countless of dance schools that I can go to in my free time and I already talked to my parents about it and they're okay with it. They were more worried about you and me going to different schools,” he had chuckled, “I think they know I'm lost without you.”

“So am I,” you had chuckled as well and had leaned your head against his shoulder, “I wouldn't know what I'd do without you.”

“Me neither..”

The third was when you were already in high school.

There was this construction site near your house, abandoned, because whoever had bought the lot wasn't able to finish what he has had in mind because he didn't have the means to do so.

It wasn't a rare find, abandoned construction sites were normal, but this one was special.

Someone had come up with the rumor – as you had later found out – that the real reason the owner abandoned the lot was because it was cursed. Or more specifically, a treasure that was beneath the construction site, was.

Some people were scared about that curse and stayed away, others came just for the curse and wanted to see if it was true and then yet again others were so determined to find it, curse or no curse, that they began to pilgrim there with their metal detectors and other equipment that you could never afford, just because they thought they could make the find of their lives – joke was on them when they found out it had all been a lie.

Him and you were neither of these people, but since the construction site was so close to your home, you often watched these people with ice cream in your hands and a belly full of laughter.

However, curiosity got the better of you in the end and you two ended up going, very late at night when nobody was there anymore and when the two of you were definitely not supposed to leave the house anymore.

You didn't even really do anything, you just stood in the middle of the construction site and looked around, him jumping at even the slightest of sounds – so much for not being scared, like he always told you.

“Do you want me to get you some diapers from the grocery store?” you had laughed when he had jumped once again and was walking closer and closer to you, until he was suddenly right next to you with his hands wrapped around your arm.

“Shut up,” he had laughed and pressed himself so close to you that you ended up wrapping your arms around him.

“I got you,” you had smiled.

And then you just stood there like this.

Hugging each other and slowly but surely your smile faded when you realized what you had actually just said, because.. you meant it.

This guy in your arms.. no matter what would happen you would always be there for him, you would always offer an embrace and he could always fall back because you would always be there to catch him.

“I got you,” you had repeated as a whisper, more serious this time, “Forever.”

And he knew you meant it by the way he tightened his own arms around your body.

The fourth was when you were both 16.

The two of you had been alone at his house, his parents out for a date and his brother doing god knows what.

You two had just played some video games, hadn't really been doing anything interesting until he remembered that his parents had bought some Soju and hadn't finished it. And because you two were curious about what it would taste like and kind of liked to be rebellious at that stage, you ended up trying it.

Not even a lot, only one glass each, but because neither of you had ever drunk any alcohol before, you were.. funny afterwards.

Not drunk, definitely not drunk, but funny.

You laughed a lot more and ended up dancing in the living room. Him properly, you just flailing your arms and legs around like Squidward from Spongebob.

He had laughed uncontrollably and had stopped you from doing so by standing right in front of you, pressing your arms down against your sides.

You had been so close, your noses touching, both still out of breath from laughing and dancing and..

..you couldn't tell whether it was the alcohol or the feelings, or maybe it was both, but suddenly his lips were on yours.

It was a short kiss, but it was so.. soft.

You remembered how hesitant you both were, but once he pulled back and looked into your eyes, there was no regret, you both just.. smiled.

Because you knew that this would happen eventually and you wanted it to.

You wanted to remember all these moments for the rest of your life and be able to look at them with a smile..

..if it weren't for that fifth moment.

“You promised you'd never leave me!” you had screamed at him, sobbing uncontrollably as you threw pillow after pillow at him, “You're a fucking liar!”

“Please, listen to me,” he had tried to calm you down, but there was no use.

You just continued crying until he ended up doing the same, because his own heart broke upon this sight.

Looking back to this moment, you knew that you should have handled it differently.

You should have been happy for him and should have encouraged him instead of screaming bloody murder. After all, you had once promised him to be by his side forever to and to always be there for him. But.. you were just so broken in that moment, mostly because he hadn’t even discussed it with you. He hadn’t even told you about any of it..

Your best friend, the love of your life.. he would leave. Forever.

Because you had known back then that he would be big one day.

And when he'd be on all those stages, singing for millions of people, he wouldn't waste a single second with thinking about you, while you'd spend the rest of your life wishing he was by your side..

And it wasn't just the fact that he would leave you, it was the timing as well. Your relationship had shifted ever since you had kissed and.. well.. you had hoped it would be able to develop more..

“Please let's just.. try to talk about this,” he had to leave that same day. And he wanted to fix this before that. He didn't want to leave like this.

But you had been so stubborn and just wanted to be angry and so you had pushed him out of the house with a final: “I hate you! I fucking hate you!”

That was the last thing you ever said to him.

You had broken down in the hallway, your mother trying her hardest to help you, but you had done nothing but cry that day.

And as your best friend left for his new life, he didn't do it with excitement, but with tears in his eyes, because he was afraid that he had made the wrong choice.

Maybe.. maybe he should have just stayed with you.

But if he had, then he wouldn't be who he was today.

Park Jimin.

Member of BTS.

The love of your life that probably didn’t even remember you now..

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Killer Queen (Girls Talk Boys Part 15)

Authors Note: This song has been stuck in my head all day so I had to use it. I want to thank anyone and everyone who’s read my writing. I am a thirsty bitch so any and all feedback and questions are appreciated

Caviar and cigarettes Well versed in etiquette Extraordinarily nice

She's a Killer Queen Gunpowder, gelatin Dynamite with a laser beam Guaranteed to blow your mind Anytime

Warnings: smoking, drinking, swearing the usual

Previous Chapter

First chapter

Camille couldn't breathe and she was afraid she was going to piss herself. It wasn't healthy to laugh this hard while wearing Spanx. She had to give him credit. Tom had really come through on the costumes. Cher's idea to go as Bob's burgers was fucking brilliant. She and Cody were Linda and Bob with Nick as Gene. Lucy was oddly sexy as Louise, but Tom dressed up as Tina was what had her in stitches.

“I am a smart, strong, sensual woman” Tom even had the voice down.

“Stop, seriously I can't do this right now. The knee socks. I can't” Camille couldn't stop laughing.

“Camille, we need to get your hair put on” Lucy, bunny ears and all, pulled her up the stairs with Tom following behind. Camille wasn't a part of the Bob's Burgers bunch. Instead she and her boss teamed up as characters from Steven Universe. Stephen was going as Steven, and Camille as Rose Quartz. Lucy helped her get into her big fluffy pink and white strapless dress. The three of them then went to work on her hair. Two separate clip in pieces attached to give her volume and long flowing pink ringlets. Between the dress and the hair she looked a bit like a drag queen coming out of a wedding cake all tits and pink curls. Camille even had to admit she looked cute.

It was a little after 9 PM. They were determined not to be the first group there so they hung out for a bit catching a pre party buzz. A round of shots and a blunt. Camille was elated she was finally feeling healthy again. She was absolutely mortified she'd gotten sick in front of Harry. He'd been an angel. Not only did he get her home and to bed, for the second time, he'd taken her notes and handled the party details until Ashton came home. Tonight was the first time she'd see Harry since that day.

She hadn't really gotten to see any of the boys since they got back from Europe. The exception being Calum who had come by the morning after he'd given her the gifts to make sure she didn't need anything else. She'd stayed wrapped in her blankets hiding her face. He'd lounged on the opposite side of her bed, at her strictly enforced distance, telling her about the tour and how he'd found each of her gifts. Camille winced remembering the torture of having Calum on her bed and not being able to touch him. They carefully avoided any serious discussion talking mostly about places they'd traveled. Camille kept asking him questions about places they'd both visited. Only while Calum toured in person Camille had only explored through books. He'd stayed for about an hour before Camille started to get sleepy again. Getting up to leave he'd turned and pounced on her. Scooping her into his arms he'd buried his face in her blankets under her chin. Camille couldn't resist reaching her fingers out to stroke his neck and his jawline. The many nights she'd fantasized were nothing compared to Calum being right here. She was glad she was swaddled up so he couldn't hear her heartbeat pounding or see how flushed she was getting. They lay there like that without a word before he'd kissed her between her eyes and left.

Cher almost lost it when she walked into the party and saw Harry dressed as Squidward. Tom REALLY came through on the costumes. Harry for his part openly whooped seeing the Belcher family.

“You guys look spectacular” Harry hugged her with four tentacles.

“No seriously that's something else” Cher stood back eyeing him. “Where's Spongebob?”

“He'll be here later. I'll have to introduce you.” He leaned in to whisper “ I heard a rumor you might be single.”

“I was always single” she whispered back.

Harry just nodded and winked at her “of course, I have to find someone but Calum and Luke are around here somewhere and I'm pretty sure I saw Ashton in the kitchen with the food”

Harry pulled Tom off with him somewhere into the crowd.

Cher caught sight of Luke and she elbowed Cody. “Check it out, it's Bat-Luke.”

Cody laughed and pointed out Calum dressed as Robin pacing back and forth “and his boy wonder.”

Cody watched as Nick and Lucy greeted Lucy's friends who'd shown up dressed as the Powerpuff Girls. He recognized one as the girl who'd hooked up with Ashton at the last party. He saw Cher's face and knew she'd recognized the girl as well. Cody made a note to keep track of this one.

Pulling Cher aside he nodded towards another party guest “Do you see who that is?”

Cher looked back and her jaw dropped “Cody is that really? Wait until Camille sees he's a person and not a salad.”

“Will you stop being stupid?” Cody hissed. “I found out he's got a new show and his costar just happens to be my ex.”

Just then Calum locked eyes with Cher and laughing hysterically he jogged over.

“Holy shit you look fucking incredible, all of you” Calum told them hugging Cher and Lucy nodding at Cody and Nick.“Although I'm never going to see Louise the same way again.” He glanced behind her. “Where's Camille?”

“I see how important we are to you Cal. Speaking of important where's the booze?” Cher teased him.

“In the kitchen. Hey do you know Luke invited uh, a guest?” Calum looked nervous

“I didn't, while I appreciate the heads up I'm fine with all of this, I promise” Cher told him. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah I'm just, fucking hell, ok so Ameena kept calling me earlier and when I finally answered” Calum suddenly stopped and Cher saw his eyes light up. She was positive she'd never seen anyone smile like that.

Camille had arrived. She'd had to wait for her boss and his girlfriend so she could bring them over, but also she liked to make an entrance.

“Camille you made it” Bat-Luke appeared at her side. “That costume is perfect. You look so pretty. Cal isn't ready for this.” His blue eyes twinkling behind his mask.

“Luke” she gasped and hugged him. “Oh I've missed you sweet boy. How is everything?”

“We'll talk later. There are other people who need to see you first” Luke gently grabbed her shoulders to turn her around where Calum was coming up. Camille caught sight of him in his costume and her butterflies were back in force.

Robin had never been a sexy character but hot damn Calum was making it work. The sleeves were super short allowing her to see every tattoo on his muscled arms. Her eyes dropped down sucking in her breath surprised at how sexy Calum's thighs looked in leggings. Realizing where her thoughts were headed she tried to focus back on his face only to blush at the intensity in his gaze. Between the bulge in his leggings and his expression Calum made no attempt to hide what he was thinking.

“Can you two please try to restrain yourselves a little” Michael and Crystal appeared breaking Camille out of her thoughts.

“Hi you guys” Camille hugged them both “oh my God y'all are the cutest ever. Wanda and Cosmo? That's too perfect.”

“I can't believe you came as Rose Quartz. It was made for you. You look great.” Michael told her.

“Who did your hair? I fucking love it.” Crystal reached out playing with the pink curls

“Tom and Lucy helped. They're clip ins. I'm lucky I got the hair first thing way before I got sick.” Camille told her glancing back towards Calum who was now talking to Cher and Cody but still looking at her.

“I hope you really like him” Camille turned back to her as Crystal spoke. “I'm not taking sides in this, but he's gone through a lot just to take a chance with you.”

“I didn't ask him to” Camille felt defensive but she couldn't pretend to be completely innocent in all of this.

“I don't think he had a choice” Crystal told her. “He fell for you pretty quickly.”

Camille shook her head. “I don't know about all that. He's still young. I'm not anything special.”

“To him you are.” Crystal replied. “So please be careful, he's been hurt enough lately.”

Camille felt her face get hot. She felt a little responsible for that. If she'd walked away from the start she could've saved Calum from some of this misery.

“Hey” Crystal nudged her “I'm not trying to make you feel bad Cam. Look how happy he is right now.” They both looked up and when Calum caught them looking he excused himself from Michael.

Calum shyly approached Camille. She had this effect on him sometimes where he got so nervous. He found himself intimidated by her, and she had no clue. Just like she'd never believe him if he told her how beautiful she was right now.

Taking her hand he raised it to his lips while bowing slightly “You look like a queen tonight, your grace.”

Camille could not breathe. How could this man be real? How could this possibly be happening?

“Thank you kind sir. Royal or drag?” Camille raised an eyebrow. She cursed herself for being sarcastic when he was being so sweet.

Until she saw his lips twitch up into that smart ass grin he'd perfected.

“A little of both really. The hair is really something else.” Calum replied.

Camille bit back her usual snark and instead planted a light kiss on his jaw just beneath his ear. “Thank you” she told him.

Cher watched them from across the room. They both looked completely smitten. She'd never seen Camille look happier.

“Yeah they're gorgeous but can we talk about how cute you are in those glasses Linda” Luke's voice startled Cher out of her reverie.

“Very funny Bat-Luke” Cher giggled.

“I brought you a drink” Bat-Luke held up a red solo cup that smelled of watermelon vodka and cranberry juice.

“Leave it to Ashton to steal Camille's recipe” Cher hated this awkwardness between them. Scanning the room she turned to him “I thought your new girlfriend was coming tonight.”

Bat-Luke took a sip of his drink “she's not my girlfriend just yet, but she's here already. Summer is Andy's assistant. She's taking photos tonight.”

“I'm sure she'll be thrilled you're talking to me” Cher quipped.

“She knows about you. I've been honest with everyone. Can I get credit for that at least?” Luke looked slightly irritated and a bit wounded.

“Luke, I don't want things to be weird between us.” Cher told him.

“Nothing has to be weird. Just two friends having a conversation dressed as two cartoon characters. Totally normal.” Luke winked at her.

“Check it out Spongebob and Patrick have arrived.” Cher pointed across the room where Harry was greeting his friends.

“Holy shit that's Liam and Niall” Luke choked out a laugh.

“Hey Foxy Mama, You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me? Hoohah!" Ashton abruptly joined them causing Cher to almost spill her drink laughing.

Ashton as Johnny Bravo was hilariously appropriate. He looked smoking hot in tight jeans and a tight black t shirt.

"I bet your name's Mickey, 'cause you're so fine. You're so fine you..."

“Ashton there you are” Camille came over to greet him with Calum in tow.

“Camille or should I say Rose” Ashton leaned in for a hug. “You look stunning sweetheart. Calum's a lucky guy”

Calum and Camille both blushed and looked at each other with adoration.

Ashton, Cher and Luke all exchanged little “awwww” glances.

The moment was interrupted by an alarm on Calum's phone suddenly going off drawing the attention of everyone around him.

“Is that your home alarm” Ashton peeked over his shoulder as he shut off the alarm.

“Yeah my back door is open.” Calum looked confused.

“You think someone broke in?” Cher asked him.

“Not so much as I'm worried Duke got out.” Calum shook his head still confused.

“What is it Calum?” Camille reached up to caress his face so he'd look at her.

“I have the weirdest feeling. I don't even remember setting the alarm” Calum kissed her hand before letting it drop. “I really do need to check on Duke.”

“Do you want me to come with you?” Camille asked.

“Yes, but if you do and I get you alone in my apartment we won't be coming back to this party.” Calum kissed her lips gently “I'll be right back I promise.”

Calum left and Ashton nudged Camille in the ribs “You two are so gross you know that. Too mushy for me.”

“Shut the fuck up Irwin” Camille shot him a smirk. “You should really show Cher where the booze is and bring me another drink.”

Ashton chuckled and bowed towards her “your grace”

He went to Cher and wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"You look pretty...I look pretty...why don't we go into the kitchen get a drink and stare at each other? You can watch my chest hair move in slow motion.”

Cher was giggling as she followed Ashton. “don't get too drunk too early.” Camille called after her.

“Mommy doesn't get drunk, mommy has fun” Cher called back.

Camille made her way back to Luke. “Is that her?” She nodded towards a pretty dark haired girl holding a camera lingering on the edge of the crowd.

“Yes actually” Luke motioned her over. “This is Summer. She's Andy's assistant/apprentice.”

“You must be Camille” Summer extended her hand.

“What gave it away” Camille smiled at her.

“The pink hair and I saw you with Cal. He's mentioned you more than a few times.” Summer looked nervous until she glanced at Luke and Camille could see the spark. “I have to go find Andy. I'm so glad I got to finally meet you Camille.”  Summer disappeared back into the crowd.

“She's cute Luke and she seems very sweet” Camille nodded at him watching him relax.

“I wanted her to meet you first. She's more nervous about Cher.” Luke took another drink before cocking his head and laughing. “Check it out Camille it's your favorite rapper.”

Camille scrunched up her nose “You know I can't stand Drake. He's a total fuckboy and this is his fuckboy anthem.”

“You know all about them fuckboys don't you Camille.” The venom in the tone of voice made both Luke and Camille whiplash towards the sound eyes wide.

“Your little boyfriend Quentin? Diamond do you love me? Ajayani are you writing? I'm not surprised you couldn't keep him satisfied. If you think for one second just because you lost your man you can make a move on mine you'd better back off bitch.”

Next Chapter Attention

I have a fetish for him in this picture I don’t even care who knows

@biba3434 @vfdsstuff @babygirlcashton

[im-coming-to-you-live]

SpongeBob- Greying Gracefully

Yeah I keep forgetting I have a tumblr. Hey, this exists.

Greying Gracefully Summary: SpongeBob finds a grey hair and begins to worry about his premature aging. Rated: T for Teen; 13+ Characters: Squidward, SpongeBob, Sandy, Patrick, Mr. Krabs, Pearl, Gary Pairing(s): None Genre: Coming of age/ Friendship Word Count: 6, 058 Fic belongs to me.

SpongeBob Musical belongs to Kyle Jarrow (who wrote the book).

SpongeBob © Nickelodeon.

[X-posted from deviantART]

It was supposed to be the quintessential ‘’best day ever’’, like it was every morning. The sun was shining, and the hills were alive with the sound of music. Nothing could possibly ruin this most perfect of perfect days, that is, until SpongeBob spotted a lone grey hair, interloping among his platinum-colored tresses. His first instinct was not to panic. ‘Okay,’ he told himself, ‘No biggie. It’s only one. And hey, silver’s a pretty color, maybe no one will notice since my hair’s so light anyway,’ but when he went to go pluck it, he found another, and yet another, silver wisps upon silver wisps. He felt the color drain from his face, just as the color had from his hair. He tried to remain optimistic, but wasn’t he a little too young to be going grey? Now, at the age of 25, a few grey strands multiplied to what seemed like nearly a hundred, silently taunting him when he looked in the mirror as if to say, “You’re getting old. You’re getting old. You’re getting old.” He had never been one to fear the future. Rather, he looked forward to it. He looked forward to the day he would turn Squidward’s age and look wise and distinguished with all those lines chiseled into his face like the rocky mountains Sandy often spoke of after her trip to New Mexico last summer. Plus, Squidward’s grey scalp looked becoming to his natural sea-green locks. It reminded SpongeBob of fluffy clouds floating over the ocean surface. He looked forward to the day he would turn Mr. Krabs’s age and still look physically fit, with hardly a wrinkle albeit attractive smile lines, and a load full of pepper and salt chest hair. Yes, the older men in his life made him feel excited to grow old. ‘’To grow old,’’ he once remarked to their wrinkled noses, ‘’Would be an awfully big adventure.’’

‘’You have no idea, kid,’’ they both told him, but SpongeBob had to laugh. To his eyes, they both aged gracefully. But then again, he had never known them to be young. He remembered sauntering into Mr. Krabs’s office one day, only to find it empty. Instead, he found an old-fashioned picture frame stuffed into one of the desk drawers, face down. SpongeBob didn’t mean to pry but curiosity got the best of him, and so he lifted the picture frame from its hiding place and wiped away the dust which coated the glass with his sweater. He didn’t immediately recognize the young man in the black and white photo—handsome, with a strong resemblance to Mr. Krabs. It couldn’t have been, could it? SpongeBob remembered removing the photo from its frame and flipping it to the backside, but there was no date. It must have been taken around 1960-something. 1964  or '65 was his wild guess. Mr. Krabs was pictured in a Navy uniform, with inky black hair and a darker complexion than he sported now. He looked almost exotic, like Egyptian. For some reason, it was eerie and haunting. The man who went off to war would never return the same man he left.  Mr. Krabs never talked about it, but SpongeBob heard stories about what kind of man he was when he came home... Pearl’s grandmother had said she didn’t even recognize her own son. But Mr. Krabs seemed happy here, and so unaware of what was to come. The soldier smiled back at him as if he knew of his innocence. He seemed both eager for its loss and nostalgic for those few years of naiveté behind him. Deeper in the drawer, SpongeBob uncovered yet another photograph, this time of Mr. Krabs in full service dress, with his name tag centered on the right breast pocket. He wasn’t smiling in this one. Most soldiers wanted to escape the draft, probably the reason for him not following the rules (his cap was off, and his left hand was in his pocket, a rakish disregard for the regulation that a soldier in war could never, ever stick a hand in his pocket ).  The hand in the pocket was almost a silent rebellion. The pockets that were empty in the photograph would soon bulge with hand grenades, extra ammunition, food, and many of the gross of condoms they were issued before a combat jump. SpongeBob held these photos side-by-side to compare them. One soldier was happy. The other was not. They almost looked like two different people. But they were both Mr. Krabs, taken in a moment of time, months apart. Is this why he had locked them away? Could he not come to terms with his own aging that began in his mere twenties? And then there was Squidward. SpongeBob had visited his neighbor’s Eastern Island home one day only to find him hiding secrets, too. He had a library under the stairs—not nearly as impressive as SpongeBob’s but the porifera couldn’t resist—and when SpongeBob intruded when Squidward wasn’t looking, he found what appeared to be a high school year book on one of the shelves. ‘’Farlingaye High’’ it said on the cover. Inside, he found quite a few surprises. One Polaroid depicted Squidward entering his amateur piece into the school art show—he proudly held it up: a little painting of Neptune-knows-what. His mum stood beside him, beaming at her little artist son. Between her hands, she held his cheap plastic briefcase that carried all his books. It wasn’t a proper grown-up briefcase that a few of the brain-box nerds had inherited from their dads. Squidward had ‘’graffitied’’ his up a bit—but come to think of it, it was still pretty geeky. Squidward looked no different than he did now, except of course he didn’t have crow’s feet, and so SpongeBob couldn’t possibly mistake the identity. He was still tall and lanky, only this time with prominent buckteeth, bespectacled, spotty, and wore braces. He was nerdy but still charming. Actually, he kind of looked like SpongeBob. But something else was different about him. He looked genuinely happy, with the excited look of a child at Christmas in his eyes, an expression of innocent glee that SpongeBob had never seen in the older Squidward. The next Polaroid, with a stain in the right corner, depicted Squidward in a class photo, wearing a blue cardigan that his mother had probably knitted for him, and a shaggy Brady Bunch haircut that was popular at the time. Again, he looked happy. But then in his graduation photo, wearing his honorary cap and gown, his diploma in his hands, he had the all-too familiar stern look he had now. And he was only 18. What happened? ‘’ I hated German,’’ he remembered Squidward saying as he came into the library to find SpongeBob crouched over his yearbook. SpongeBob hurriedly tried to close the book and return it to its proper place, but Squidward didn’t seem to mind so much. He came up beside him and pointed at his young self and said, ‘’It was’t the subject, it was the incredibly dull, dull, dull teacher. I was always getting shouted at and sent out of the class for messing around. I was always mortified having to take that walk of shame to the door. I was such a loser. Y’know, I got picked on all the time.’’ ‘’Is that why you look so unhappy here?’’ SpongeBob asked. ‘’Yes,’’ Squidward admitted sadly, before realizing his error, and snapped, ‘’I mean no! I was itching to be done with school because, by about 13, I knew I wanted to go off to performing arts college, but I could barely afford it. Looking back, high school only lasted a few years! I should have relaxed and tried to enjoy and get more out of it.’’ And with that, he closed the book and shooed SpongeBob out of the library. He was never allowed to bring up Squidward’s high school days ever again. As SpongeBob studied his grey hairs in the bathroom mirror, he wondered what he would look like in twenty years, fifty. Seeing how rapidly Squidward and Mr. Krabs aged in their youth, when they were supposed to be in the prime of their life, he wondered what he would look like in only a few months from now. Would he forget how to smile? Would he be frowning on his 26th birthday? Was it possible to grow old before he reached 30? He didn’t mind getting old, it was inevitable, but he didn’t want to get old now. He sighed, and walking out of the bathroom, he found Gary sprawled out on his side on the bed, completely content. ‘’Gary, can I ask you an honest question?’’ The snail rustled, looking annoyed that he had been disturbed from his nap. When he finally focused his eyes on SpongeBob, he said, ‘’Do you think I look���old?’’ Gary took one look at him and replied with a sarcastic, ‘’Meow.’’ SpongeBob frowned. ‘’Gee, thanks. You’re a real pal.’’                                                                               *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ‘’ I’m only 25! I found my first grey hair and I might be going bald.’’ SpongeBob complained as Squidward sat him down in a chair. ‘’Congratulations, you’re turning into me,’’ Squidward grumbled. ‘’You lost your hair at my age?’’ SpongeBob gasped. Squidward continued to stare at SpongeBob, not amused, then pointed to his hair, which, despite a receding hairline, he mostly still had. ‘’Gracious me, now where did all my hair go?’’ ‘’Did you check between your legs? That’s where most of my hair is.’’ Squidward slapped his forehead at such disbelief. ‘’You’re such a twit.’’ The boy shrugged. ‘’I dunno. I thought maybe it was a toupee.’’ ‘’Then yank on it.’’ SpongeBob did, reaching out to grab fist fulls of Squidward’s hair to see if it was really attached to his scalp, and it must have been, because he yelped, ‘’Ouch, not so hard, you prat!’’ and he shoved SpongeBob away. Yup, it was definitely real. And soft. Synthetic hair wouldn’t be that soft.   ‘’This is awful!’’ SpongeBob began to cry into his hands. ‘’Am I gonna be all white before thirty, Squidward?’’ ‘’Mellow fucking out, SpongeBob,’’ Squidward snapped. ‘’You’re still young. You have your whole life before you.’’ ‘’Before me?’’ he wailed. ‘’No, all is over for me! I’m dying!’’ Squidward rolled his eyes. ‘’I didn’t think you were so vain. Hey, is this the same guy who said growing old would be fun?’’ ‘’Yeah, but…I’m not old. I mean, I didn’t expect to be turning grey until twenty years from now,’’ SpongeBob said, wiping his eyes on his shirt. ‘’Exactly. You’re not old. Look, sometimes you get a few grey hairs here and there, doesn’t mean you’re aging.’’ ‘’Then what’s happening to me?’’ ‘’There’s nothing wrong with you…Well, alright, there’s a million things wrong with you but a grey hair or two is the least of your problems. You’re freaking out over nothing.’’ Squidward approached him, and then with a comb in tow, he parted SpongeBob’s blonde tresses to inspect the so-called ‘’damage’’. After a few moments of brushing through SpongeBob’s hair, he shook his head and said, ‘’Oh yes, this looks very bad.’’ SpongeBob felt his heart sink. ‘’How bad?’’ ‘’Very very. More serious than I thought. Tsk tsk. There’s a few more back here you didn’t catch. You poor ol’ chap. I suppose your entire head will be all white before thirty.’’ SpongeBob clutched his chest and moaned in fright at such dreadful news. But then he heard Squidward laughing. ‘’What’s so funny?’’ he demanded through the tears welling in his eyes. ‘’I’m just messing with you!’’ Squidward chuckled. ‘’Aside from a few grey strands, your head looks completely fine. Blonde as ever. And you’re not going bald, you have enough hair to make a wig for a grape!’’ SpongeBob stood from his chair and punched Squidward in the chest. He didn’t appreciate the sarcasm, not now in a time like this when he really needed his help. ‘’Oh c’mon, SpongeBob, it was a joke!’’ Squidward tried to reason, but SpongeBob wasn’t having it. ‘’If you’re not going to help me, I’ll find someone who will,’’ SpongeBob proclaimed as he made his way to the door. ‘’Can’t you see I’m ailing? You know what, Squid, you’re so full of—‘’ ‘’Alright!’’ Squidward cut him off. ‘’No need to get nasty. I’ll just cut the greys, and give you some coloring if you want. It’s what I use.’’ This didn’t ease SpongeBob’s worries. ‘’I’m going to have to color my own hair?’’ ‘’Look, it’s not going to turn grey overnight. Those few follicles that lost their pigment won’t affect the surrounding hairs. At most, those are the only grey hairs you’ll have for awhile. As you get older, it’ll get more grey. You’ll most likely still be blonde at thirty. It’s a gradual change, SpongeBob. You get used to it.’’ ‘’Were you greying at my age?’’ Squidward sighed. ‘’Younger than you, actually. In my late teens. You’re lucky. At least you’re almost thirty, in five years. For me, it was over by thirty. It runs in the family. My cousin’s been coloring her hair since she was twenty-two. I used to wonder what propelled my mother to keep her hair dark brown at sixty, when it long ago decided it wanted to be white at twenty-eight. But I’m just as guilty as her now. Truth is, it has very little to do with fear of aging and a lot more to do with an unwillingness to look and, some might say, act my age. I’m one of those people frequently mistaken for someone much younger, and I admit I like it. So sue me.’’ SpongeBob looked at Squidward’s glorious head of hair and couldn’t blame him. Aside from sporting a white skunk stripe down the middle, you couldn’t even tell he had been coloring his hair all these years, nor could you tell he was grey under all that natural looking turquoise. He didn’t even look old, even if he had kept his hair grey. SpongeBob came back to his chair and let Squidward cut out the grey hairs before the older man sent him home with hair dye and pre-shampoo conditioner to keep the coarse, wiry grey hairs moisturized and smooth when they grew back. SpongeBob was grateful to Squidward, but at the same time, he didn’t know if he was ready to start all the daily hair treatments of his 45-year-old neighbor. ‘Well,’ he thought, trying to cheer himself up, ‘I always did think we were something like brothers, but this isn’t quite what I had in mind.’ He began to fear the worst: What if he checked into a retirement home the same day as Squidward, while his younger looking, more vital friends—with their beautiful, un-grey hair—had to pay him burdensome visits? If people remarked that Squidward looked exceptionally young for his age, he wondered if he would begin to look too old for his age. Time for a second opinion.                                                                                  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ‘’Did I ever find a grey hair?’’ Patrick echoed the question as he tread into the kitchen for another grape soda. SpongeBob followed behind him, waiting for an answer. After Patrick opened a soda and handed it to SpongeBob he said, ‘’Nope, can’t say I ever had. But if I ever found a green hair, well, that’s a different story.’’ He opened another soda, took a sip, then continued, ‘’I tried to dye my hair blue once. It turned green for some reason. Or was it lilac? Actually, what is lilac? Is that, like, yellow?’’ ‘’Purple,’’ SpongeBob explained. ‘’Lilac’s purple, Patrick.’’ ‘’Purple Patrick, maybe that was it. Hey, I didn’t know there was a color named after me!’’ In spite of himself, SpongeBob had to laugh. Patrick always found a way to cheer him up. ‘’Yeah, no, about my question…so like, never ever?’’ ‘’What was the question again?’’ ‘’If you ever found a grey hair?’’ ‘’If you ever found a grey hair?’ ‘’No, you.’’ ‘’Got it.’’ And Patrick took another lengthy chug from his soda, nearly emptying it. SpongeBob waited for him to say something else, but he didn’t. He seemed to have forgotten what they were even talking about. ‘’Patrick?’’ ‘’Yeah?’’ ‘’Well?’’ ‘’What?’’ ‘’Did you?’’ ‘’Did I what?’’ ‘’Find a grey hair?’’ He blinked, registering the question for a moment, then he suddenly seemed to comprehend. ‘’Oh right. No, I don’t think so.’’ ‘’Positive?’’ ‘’Affirmative. I mean, you can look if you want. Don’t think you’ll find anything.’’ With that, he bowed his head as low as possible, but SpongeBob still couldn’t reach so he grabbed a nearby chair and stood on top of it. But Patrick was right. As he sifted through his cotton-candy quiff, he didn’t see one hint of a silver strand. It was all beautifully bubble gum pink. SpongeBob felt a little jealous. Patrick was 28, and he hadn’t a single sign of greying anytime soon. He would probably still have pink hair at Mr. Krabs’s age. He sighed, and hopped off the chair. Patrick noticed his sour mood and asked, ‘’What’s wrong? It’s lice, isn’t it?’’ ‘’Huh? No, your hair looks fine. Great, actually.’’ ‘’Then what is it?’’ He rubbed his arm, and said, ‘’I...found a few grey hairs this morning.’’ ‘’Seriously? But you’re like, a baby!’’ Patrick joked. But SpongeBob wasn’t laughing. ‘’I’m serious.’’ ‘’Don’t worry about it, buddy. Sandy will know what to do,’’ he said, patting SpongeBob on the back. Sandy, of course. Why didn’t he think of it before? With that, he stood on his tiptoes to plant a kiss on Patrick’s forehead, but he couldn’t reach, so he kissed him on the cheek instead. ‘’Patrick, you’re a genius!’’ And he rushed to the door, but not fast enough in time, for he could hear Patrick angrily remarking as he left, ‘’What did I say?! Just ‘cause you’re turning old, don’t take it out on me! I was just trying to help! You know what, SpongeBob? Screw you! You’re a genius, and it’s showing too!‘’                                                                              *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * ‘’Stress, genetics, B-12 deficiency…a lot of reasons people turn grey in their twenties,’’ Sandy explained. ‘’ When your body stops producing melanin, a pigment found in the hair follicle, your hair goes grey. Another factor that may contribute to grey hair is the buildup of hydrogen peroxide in the hair. As you grow older, the enzyme catalase that breaks down hydrogen peroxide diminishes. This leaves your hair bleached by hydrogen peroxide. But here’s what not to do: don’t pluck it. You’ll just go bald from all that trauma to your scalp. Use non-ammonia based color. All those chemicals ain’t healthy. Nutritionally focus on protein at breakfast and lunch—available energy to hair tissue is lowest in the morning, did you know that?--, keep hydrated and choose healthy snacks like yogurt, nuts and fruits. You can do all this, SpongeBob, but everyone’s different. You might be going prematurely grey and there’s nothing you can do about it. All you can do is accept yourself and move on.’’ ‘’Squidward said it’s a slow change, is that true?’’ ‘’He’s right, I reckon,’’ she nodded. ‘’Why? Did he share with you a ‘going grey’ story?’’ SpongeBob just chewed his bottom lip, which caused Sandy to burst out in a hearty laugh. ‘’Hah! I knew he colored his hair!’’ ‘’Is that bad?’’ ‘’Nah,’’ she snorted. ‘’Half the population probably does. Y’know, I just thought of something funnier than all that.’’ ‘’What?’’ ‘’ Caucasians begin to grey in their mid-30’s, Asians in their late 30’s and African Americans in their 40’s, according to a 2011 research analysis published in The Dermatologist. On average, 50 percent of the population will have 50 percent grey hair by the age of 50. Gender seems to play a role as well: Men start greying closer to 30, while women begin to notice grey hairs around 35. So don’t worry about it. Even if you turn grey sooner than all’s the rest of us, give us five more years, and we’ll be greying together.’’ With that, she slapped her knee. She thought it was a riot, but SpongeBob failed to see the humor in all this. ‘’Patrick’s a little older than me, and he hasn’t found his first silvery strand yet,’’ SpongeBob admitted sadly. ‘’Everybody’s different,’’ she shrugged. ‘’But if you’re worried about your mortality, your hair’s got nothing to do with it. You’ll live long, still. You’re a sponge, for crying out loud.’’                                                                               *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * He hoped Sandy was right, but as he left her Treedome, he wondered if he would ever be able to accept himself someday with a head full of grey or white hair. Would he be like Squidward’s mother, and continue to color his hair well into his sixties? It was a ridiculous thought, having blonde hair at that age. But as he bumped into Mr. Krabs on his way to the Krusty Krab, he realized maybe it wasn’t so ridiculous. Mr. Krabs was about 70, he realized, and he sported bright red hair. But then SpongeBob suddenly recalled the old photograph of Mr. Krabs in his navy uniform, and though the picture wasn’t in color, his hair looked too dark back then to be red, or even a burnt auburn. Did he…? ‘’Boyo, didn’t see ya there!’’ Mr. Krabs bellowed. ‘’Hey, Mr. Krabs,’’ he solemnly smiled. ‘’Say, can I ask you something?’’ Mr. Krabs narrowed his eyes into slits and scrutinized SpongeBob like a fly on the wall. ‘’If you’re asking me permission to take out me darlin’, beautiful daughter, a teenager, mind, on a date—‘’ ‘’What? No, Mr. Krabs, I—‘’ But the expression on the retired vet’s face quickly changed into a friendly smile, and he rustled SpongeBob’s hair with his meaty claw to show he meant well. ‘’I’m just joshin’, lad, relax! Should’ve seen the look on yer face! Got ya, didn’t I?’’ and he chuckled his familiar sailor’s laugh. ‘’Yeah. Heh. You got me,’’ SpongeBob tried to laugh along. ‘’Look, Mr. Krabs, I just—‘’ But Mr. Krabs wasn’t listening. He got that look in his eyes that he often did when he thought of a brilliant business venture. SpongeBob knew it all too well, because he titled his head back and rubbed his chin in deep thought. ‘’Come to think of it, that’s not a half bad idea. Could get Pearly outta me hair for a few hours. That is, if ya don’t mind.’’ ‘’Sure, whatever, but—‘’ ‘’She’s been drivin’ me crazy, that kid! Y’know how much the phone bill was this month? Calling and texting! I swear, she’s as bad as her grandmother, she’s got that phone growing right outta her ear! I caught her talkin’ to some friend at two in the mornin’! Two! What’s with kids these days?’’ ‘’It’s a mystery,’’ SpongeBob agreed. ‘’Look, can I ask you—‘’ But Mr. Krabs cut him off again. ‘’She’s eatin’ me outta house and home! I can’t wait till she finds a nice man to settle down with and move out. Well, truth be told it breaks me heart to think of it. You try to hold them as long as you can, but then a day comes when they don’t want to be around you no more. SpongeBob, never have children. You’ll live longer. I’ve been going grey since the day she was born.’’ ‘’That’s what I want to ask you about.’’ Mr. Krabs suddenly snapped his head towards SpongeBob as a dark look crossed him. ‘’You’re poppin’ me the question, ain’t ya, laddy?’’ ‘’Huh? What are you even talking about?’’ Mr. Krabs slung a strong arm around his shoulders and pulled him close. ‘’You’re a nice kid, SpongeBob. I’ve always thought of you as the son I never had. But I don’t know if you’re right for Pearl. No offense. So before you ask, I just have to say one thing: you’re already part of the family, and if you think marrying me daughter is going to get you that promotion, then think again. Because family or no family, you’re just not manager material!’’ SpongeBob blinked, and then shook his head. ‘’It’s not about Pearl.’’ Instead of growing relieved, this seemed to anger Mr. Krabs even more. ‘’What? Now you’re saying you’re too good for me daughter?’’ ‘’No, Pearl’s fine, it’s just—‘’ ‘’Just fine, eh?’’ ‘’She’s great, okay?’’ ‘’She’s pretty, right? Prettiest in all the seven seas?’’ ‘’Yes, absolutely!’’ ‘’So you do fancy her?!’’ Finally, SpongeBob had to push against the crab’s chest to knock some sense into him. ‘’Mr. Krabs, will you just listen to me!?’’ ‘’You’re not poppin’ the question?’’ ‘’No.’’ ‘’What is it, kiddo?’’ Mr. Krabs inquired, finally calming down. ‘’Well, you see…you dye your hair, right?’’ Mr. Krabs suddenly looked self-aware and his claws went instinctively to his head. ‘’What makes you say that?’’ ‘’Well…don’t get mad at me…but a long time ago, I saw this picture in your desk…’’ ‘’Oh, that one. Well, the cat was bound to come outta the bag sooner or later.’’ ‘’So…you went grey after the war?’’ SpongeBob asked. ‘’It was a few years after the war, actually, but yes, eventually I greyed at fifty.’’ ‘’That’s normal, isn’t it?’’ ‘’Sure, but I didn’t want me old Navy buddies to see how much I aged. And so I tried to find a dye that matched me natural color, with no luck. Me hair, SpongeBob, was a dark oak brown back in the day. Hard to believe, no? At least I wasn’t balding, but me friends still had dark hair at me age and I felt ashamed. So I holed up on a small Greek island, hoping that I’d be able to find au nat-ur-al hair color. Turns out that the only Greek colorings available were all unnatural hues of red.’’ ‘’Didn’t your friends say anything?’’ ‘’Nah. Me new red hair blended in with me claws so much, they forgot how dark I used to be. Why’re you asking me all this anyhow?’’ ‘’Oh,’’ SpongeBob smiled, ‘’No reason.’’ Mr. Krabs wasn’t so sure he believed him, but decided not to ask any more questions. ‘’So you’re picking up me daughter at eight and bringing her back no later than 9:30.’’ It wasn’t a request, it was a command. ‘’Take her somewhere fun, and make sure she throws out that damn shell phone!’’                                                                                *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  *  * Maybe it was common for forty-somethings to dye their hair, and though he didn’t mind coloring well into Squidward’s age, he didn’t know if he could keep that up until his seventies. If Mr. Krabs was still dyeing his hair at his age, SpongeBob wondered if he would ever be able to escape. When do you stop? He was reminded of a dinner party a few months ago, when he, Patrick and Squidward decided to have a date, only for Squidward to crash the party. He kept complaining about how lonely and depressed he was, and when SpongeBob asked him why, his response was, ‘’Have you ever had to bury your own mother at 24?’’ He deeply sighed and lamented how he wished he knew how to die. SpongeBob and Patrick of course dismissed such talk, as this wasn’t unusual for Squidward, but his words haunted SpongeBob in that very moment. Squidward didn’t know how to stop what had been started. That’s kind of how SpongeBob felt now about obsessing over his greying hair. No one tells you how—or when—you’re supposed to stop. Intellectually, he knew there would  be a day when he would no longer color his hair. But how do you know when that day is? Will it be when his children go off to college? After his youngest child’s wedding? At the birth of his first grandchild? Or would he be the little old man in the nursing home who, with his last dying breath, demanded that the hair colorist be brought in for a final touchup? He shivered at the thought. And here he always regarded the two men he looked up to the most, Squidward and Mr. Krabs, as having aged gracefully. But they were as obsessed with their own mortality and vanity as SpongeBob was now at 25. He didn’t want to be like that forever, especially not at their age. All that stress would cause him to grey faster. And so as he went to pick up Pearl that night from the Krabs’ residence, he knew a teenage girl may be his last hope. Squidward and Mr. Krabs’s ‘’going grey’’ stories only made him feel ridiculous. A young man such as himself shouldn’t be trying to make himself look younger as though he were 45 or 70, going through a pre-existential crisis. Patrick’s grey-free locks—at 28—only made him feel envious. And Sandy’s cut and dry briefing didn’t help much either. He didn’t need lectures or experiences to help him through this. He just needed to let loose. He was about to knock on the door when it opened for him, and there stood Pearl in the doorway looking stunning as ever. Her dark hair, which was usually elaborately coiffed at the side of her head, was now pulled back into a bun with a pink bow to tie it in place. She wore an off-the-shoulder sweater over a sundress, plum in color, her long skirt ruffling in the light breeze. A silver bracelet danced on her wrist as she raised her arm to greet him. It matched her gold lipstick. As she looked into his eyes and gave him an innocent, childish smile suitable for a six-year-old, especially with that beauty mark at the top corner of her lip, all the breath left his body. ‘’Hi, SpongeBob,’’ she said. ‘’Um, hi.’’ He was surprised he could still speak. Pearl was just a kid, but she was growing up fast. Mr. Krabs suddenly interrupted them, appearing behind his daughter. ‘’Remember, have her back no later than 9:30, or I’ll make sure you never grill a single Krabby Patty for the rest of yer miserable life.’’ ‘’Daddy, stop embarrassing me,’’ Pearl teased, and kissed him on the nose before she stepped out onto the porch. SpongeBob suddenly felt underdressed in his blazer and khakis. He wasn’t even wearing dress shoes. ‘’Make sure she has the best time of her life or yer fired!’’ Mr. Krabs exclaimed before closing the door.     ‘’He doesn’t mean it. You know he’ll never fire you,’’ she reassured him. ‘’I know,’’ he said. ‘’Um, I don’t drive, so we have to walk…if that’s alright. Or we can take the city bus.’’ ‘’Walking’s fine. It’s nice tonight, huh?’’ and she stepped off the porch, waiting for him to follow. ‘’Say, I’m going for my boating license soon. If I get mine before the next date, we can take a drive down at the beach.’’ Next date? He hoped she didn’t think they were going steady, or was only using him to impress her friends because she had a 25-year-old ‘’boyfriend’’. He hoped she knew this was just a favor for her father, although he liked her well enough, but truthfully, she was just too young. Once they got to ground level, SpongeBob realized she wasn’t wearing her usual platform sneakers, but instead, she was wearing flats, perhaps in an attempt to make him feel taller and less awkward. ‘’So where’re taking me?’’ she asked, as she fished for her shell phone in her purse and began to text someone. He eyed her, hoping she wouldn’t be more interested in the phone than in him through the course of the night. ‘’Sssh,’’ she said, putting a finger to her lips when she noticed his look, ‘’Daddy tried to hide my phone but that’s why I always keep a spare. If he finds out I have this, I’m grounded until I graduate college.’’ SpongeBob shrugged. ‘’I won’t tell if you won’t.’’ She laughed. ‘’I always thought you were weird, but you’re kinda cool, SpongeBob.’’ He laughed too, and for the first time all day, he forgot about his dilemma. He looked at Pearl again, in her Maybelline cat eye, and avant-garde chandelier earrings, and wondered if she would ever worry about aging. She didn’t seem to worry about anything. Even though most teenagers never thought too far down the road—he knew at Pearl’s age, he didn’t; he never thought he would ever get old—she didn’t seem the type to develop a keen appreciation of head scarves to hide eventual hair loss, and who would learn the lesson of never traveling without an emergency box of hair color. ‘’Hey, Pearl—‘’ She closed her phone and excitedly remarked, ‘’So I just texted my friend and she said there’s this swanky new joint in town, some new Tiki bar that just opened up! Wanna go?’’ ‘’You’re not the legal drinking age,’’ he pointed out. ‘’I’ll get in trouble if—‘’ ‘’I won’t tell if you won’t,’’ she shrugged. She grabbed him by the hand and they walked towards the direction of the bar. ‘’So, SpongeBob, you were going to ask me something?’’ ‘’Um, yeah. I just…see…it’s complicated…’’ he stopped in his tracks, and when she tried to pull him, he wouldn’t budge. ‘’Who died?’’ she asked. ‘’My hair.’’ ‘’Your hair?’’ ‘’I found a grey hair this morning.’’ She raised an eyebrow at him. ‘’Rough. Hey, aren’t you only 25?’’ ‘’Yeah.’’ She approached him and, with a mischievous grin, she lightly poked his chest. ‘’Oh c’mon, you’re SpongeBob, you’re, like, supposed to be the happiest dude in Bikini Bottom! Do you think one little grey hair is gonna get him down?’’ SpongeBob looked at her, trying to smile, but it pained him to do so. ‘’I’m not always as happy as everyone thinks. I was like you yesterday. So full of life. Now I know how Squidward feels. Someday, it’s all over.’’ ‘’Nothing lasts forever,’’ Pearl said. ‘’If it did, they’d make permanent lipstick that didn’t fade throughout the day, am I right? But you don’t see me crying about it. That’s what the powder room’s for.’’ ‘’Yeah, I guess you’re right.’’ ‘’Let me tell you a story.’’ He sighed. ‘’I think I’ve heard enough today.’’ ‘’No, just listen. See, when I was a little girl I used to love playing with my grandma’s hair. It was pure white, like snow. I thought it was so pretty. I asked her, ‘Grandma, when I’m your age, will I have long flowing white hair someday?’ I wanted to know how the world saw her and how she saw herself. I also asked why she decided to stop coloring her hair and was shocked to hear that she never colored in the first place. That generally leads to mental calculations about how many schools could have been built with what people spend in pursuit of avoiding grey hair. The moral of the story is, SpongeBob, my grandma wasn’t ashamed of aging. Once she started going grey, that was it. She just let it happen. I always wanted to be like her. And even though I’m wearing make-up now, I know someday I’ll think it’s silly. All I know is, when I’m old, I’m gonna have white hair, and rock it like there’s no tomorrow. Who cares what people think? In my opinion, I think it’s childishly stupid that my dad doesn’t let his hair grey naturally. I think he looks better grey, the handsomest man in this little town.’’ She playfully nudged his shoulder when she finished. He listened to her story, and realized she was right. It’s going to happen someday. You can’t avoid it forever. Might as well throw caution to the wind, and whatever happens, happens. He smiled. He couldn’t believe he was taking advice from a 16-year-old girl, but she had a profound wisdom beneath all that typical adolescence. ‘’You know what, Pearl? You’re right.’’ ‘’Amen, lil’ brother!’’ she laughed, and held up a hand for a high-five. He returned the gesture and said, ‘’Amen, lil’ sister.’’                                                                                Fin

[blvirisms-blog]

We've Gone Way Too Fast For Way Too Long || Squad

naomi brought the last of her things into the small cabin, her hoodie dripping wet from the thunderstorm that was taking place outside. she thought it was a good idea, staying in the remote cabin that belonged to one of the tour guides for the night until the storm passed. she knew if the group would have kept driving— something bad would of had happened. “you guys might want to go get your stuff before it gets worse out there. seriously wouldn’t be surprised if we were flooded out. it’s crazy.”

verena squealed as she hurried into the small, yet eerie cabin. dropping her things by the door, she shook off her coat, tiny water droplets flying everywhere. “this is insane! i’m pretty sure i’ve seen this exact scene in a horror movie before…”

naomi rolled her eyes “no— don’t do that. especially not now.” she shook her head and made her way over to the living room section of the cabin, crouching down in front of the fireplace. “how are we supposed to light this?”

verena removed her jacket and hung it on the old coat rack that stood by the door. “well, i’m just pointing out the obvious.” following naomi over to the fire place, vee crossed her arms. “you don’t have a lighter and some paper?”

naomi “do i look like a walking home depot store?” she asked in an obvious tone, rolling her eyes playfully. “we’re in a cabin. i’m sure there’s some matches or like… wood around here. i don’t know.”

verena “well seeing as i saw a heaping pile of wood sitting outside and it’s raining, we might be shit out of luck on the whole fire thing…“

naomi sighed "well looks like we’re gonna freeze to death. unless we look around for something to set on fire. dare i suggest burning what’s left of blair’s soul?”

verena giggled at naomi’s joke as her eyes moved around the room looking for something to burn “sadly i don’t think there’s enough left to even get a fire lit.”

naomi “good one. every try stand up?” she stood up and stretched, looking around the room before walking over to her backpack. “i got a notebook in here. i guess we can use that. but that means you all owe me some paper.”

verena “ well, we aren’t going to get much heat if we simply burn paper! we need something…” her eyes surveyed the room again, stopping as they fell on a broken chair. “perfect! i don’t think the owners are gonna miss this.” grabbing a few of the pieces, she returned to the fireplace and began placing the wooden legs down. “we can still use the paper as kindling though.”

naomi shrugged her shoulders. “verena i’ve never been camping before so i have no idea what the fuck i’m supposed to do…” she trailed off, rummaging through the drawers until she found a box of matches. “okay now i’m starting to think we’re being set up.” she said, holding up the box of matches

verena gave naomi a pointed look “see, i told you something was fishy was going on, but noo, you wanna play naive simply to save what’s left of your sanity.” finishing with the mini bone fire structure, vee held out her hand. “paper please.”

naomi “i think we should all just forget about the horror movie cliches.” she handed verena the paper before continuing “there’s no way they’re true and all we’re doing is scaring ourselves.”

damaris entering the cabin at a bit of a jog in an attempt to get out of the rain as quick as possible, damaris pulled her soaked bandanna off and dropped it down with her bag at the edge of the door, casting a glance naomi and verena’s way. “how’s the fire lighting going?” it was a safe bet that that was what they were doing, considering where they were and all they had.

naomi “bad. unless verena here pulls some survivor shit and magically lights it. anyways i don’t think we have enough wood for the fire so we’re going to have to use it wisely.” her reply was directed to damaris and she sat down on one of the couches in the living room. “but other than that— home sweet home?”

verena “move over already and give me the matches!” bumping naomi’s hip with her own, vee dropped down to her knees and began working on the fire.

naomi threw them in verena’s direction, smiling contently as they landed beside her. “i feel like squidward when he was camping with spongebob and patrick when the sea bear attacked.”

blair stumbled into the cabin. “holy shit,” she huffed, soaked completely with one of daniel’s hoodies on her head.

damaris “have you looked round the cabin?- maybe there’s firewood stored somewhere, or something…” she didn’t want to sound too hopeful. after all, were the chances really all that high? “good luck, verena-” interrupted by blair’s arrival, damaris threw her a look of pity, “you okay?”

blair: “i’m fine,” she mumbled, looking around. “what’re you guys doing?”

verena “well naomi is lounging, i’m trying to make a fire and i think damaris is looking for fire wood. how abouts you? where’s your boy toy?” vee clapped her hands together as the fire finally took to the old chair wood.

blair looked out the window. “i think he’s trying to get as much stuff as possible into his bag. also, where are you planning to make the fire?”

naomi “no we haven’t and i’m too tired that i might knock out before the fire does.” naomi cheered as the fire started “well obviously in the fireplace. blair are you okay? has hanging around daniel really knocked some iq points off of you?”

damaris “oh… well….” looking around, reluctant to move forward into the cabin, she seemed stuck in place ‘til naomi’s iq comment and then, she was rushing to push in- “anyway- would you like to help me look around, b?”

blair “well shit naomi, i didn’t notice the fireplace, i’ve been here for like 3 seconds. i have a lighter though, if that helps?”

naomi “we found matches. i think you should help damaris look for more wood to keep it going.” she suggested.

blair “wood? in the rain? are you kidding?”

naomi “around the house. my bad for not making it clear.”

damaris “maybe there’s a basement? don’t people keep wood in basements?” even the mention of one made her uncomfortable, but, if it’d keep them busy…

blair “this place doesn’t look big enough to have a basement but we can look, i guess.”

naomi “if you guys need anything, just give us a shout. i think the owners mentioned a basement where they keep their hunting crap.”

blair “maybe we should wait for daniel to come in.”

naomi “why? so he can protect you from the dark? it’s just a basement.” she rolled her eyes “you have your best friend going with you— i’m sure she’ll take care of you just fine.”

damaris “you don’t think i can keep you safe, if there’s anything down there?-” she’d been in the middle of raising her hands up and pretending to punch the air, toughly, when she realized what she’d said- “i mean. obviously there wouldn’t be anything down there- but if there was, i could keep you safe!”

blair “maybe i just like having my boyfriend around since majority of you hate me, ever think of that?” blair snapped. she looked at damaris with a small grin and put her hands on the girl’s fists. “don’t hurt yourself, mar,” she chuckled.

naomi “suit yourself. i have to pee.” she got up and brushed pass the two girls in the direction of where she assumed the bathroom was. damaris “i don’t think the majority of people hate you, b-” sending the quickest of helpless looks at naomi’s retreating back, maris opted for just trying to keep the grin on blair’s face- even if it were only small. “hurt /myself/? pfft- if anything’s getting hurt, it’s whatever decides to come after you. just lemme at ‘em- i’ll rock ‘em, i’ll sock 'em, i’ll make 'em regret ever trying it!”

blair rolled her eyes at a lack of response from naomi and patted maris’ shoulder. “i’m sure you could.” damaris “for you, i could do absolutely anything,” she lifted her chin and gave a very sure nod, trying to seem confident in abilities she knew she definitely lacked. “but- if you wanna wait for daniel, i’ll understand. even if i think i can keep us both safe.” blair “it’s nothing against you, and i definitely don’t doubt your abilities,” blair grinned. “i just want him here,” she said quietly, looking out the window again. damaris “i gotcha,” she nodded again, this time, in understanding. she wasn’t about to say so out loud, but… she’d have felt the same way, way back when, with cristian. “d'you think he and the guys will be much longer?” blair “i don’t know, he’s probably trying to get literally everything into bags because he’s insane,” she chuckled.

naomi returned from the bathroom, her shirt soaked and her mouth ajar "okay… before you ask— yes the sink is broken and there’s only one bedroom here so what is the sleeping arrangement?” she asked, walking over to her bags and rummaging to find a clean t-shirt. blair “well actually, i was going to ask how you managed to pee that high,” blair chuckled. “one bedroom, but how many beds?” damaris “damnit, daniel,” she shook her head, but, was unsurprised. “blair-” she gave her friend a look, before turning sympathetic, “sorry you had to be the one to find out, naomi. maybe…- shouldn’t blair & daniel get the bedroom?” daniel “I’m not picky.” daniel finally appeared, bags hung over his shoulder. “just let me know where to set this stuff – the circulation in my fingers is starting to cut off.” he chuckled. “I don’t mind having one big sleepover.” he teased, grinning. naomi pulled out her t-shirt and set it aside “ha ha, very funny.i think we should all stay in the bedroom. there’s only a twin size bed in there but plenty of floor space. i guess the couple can take the bed.” she looked up as daniel entered and shrugged,“ but i’ll be damned if daniel suggests for us to split up in this creepy cabin. especially with the weather.” verena scuffed at damaris’ idea for the couple to share the room. “yeah–no. they don’t get everything because they are dating. beside’s they shouldn’t be having sex in someone elses cabin. it’s rude.” blair rolled her eyes, taking some bags from daniel. “a sleepover? how old are you?” she laughed at him. damaris “if we’re all gonna convene in the room, maybe set all that down in there?” damaris suggested to daniel, a little sad that bryce hadn’t appeared right behind him. “i didn’t say they’d be…- i just thought- nevermind.” verena “oh come on, have you met them? must i remind everyone of daniel’s birthday party where there was no safe place to sit?” pushing herself off the floor, vee plopped down on the couch, pleased that she was able to start a fire. blair “that was because it was disgusting, not because we fucked everywhere.” damaris “besides- you sit in cristian’s van /all the time/, and, he’s probably done way more gross things there.” she couldn’t help herself pointing out the obvious with a shrug of one shoulder. verena “yeah, but its cristians van. he wasn’t borrowing it from a friend– though if he was, he probably would still have sex in it…” verena shuddered at the disgusting thought that found it’s way into her head. naomi “either way we’re all covered in sex germs. disgusting to think about but we are. now if you excuse me, i’m going to go change and claim a spot in the room!” she got up and gathered all her things before walking into the bedroom.

naomi it was around two in the morning when naomi was awoken by what sounded like footsteps right outside the window from the room they were all staying in. she sat up from her spot, yawning quietly and rubbing the sleepiness from her eyes. “hey— did you guys hear that?” she asked in a whisper, shaking whoever was around her awake carefully. blair rolled over and rubbed her eyes. “what?” verena groaned, annoyed that she was being woken up in the middle of the night. “no naomi, go back to sleep for the love of all that is holy!” naomi pointed towards the window “i heard someone outside.” truth be told the brunette was still half asleep but she was one hundred percent sure she had heard something outside. “vee.. i’m being serious.” blair “naomi,” she groaned. “this is not the time for dramatics.” naomi rolled her eyes and slowly got up, tip-toeing around the bodies that were on the floor before reaching the window. she cupped her hands so she could see better and when she did, she jumped and gasped. “g-guys… i just saw someone out there.” she whisper yelled, turning back to look at the two girls. verena “i thought we agreed to nip the whole scary story shit in the bud.” vee pushed herself up on her elbows as she looked up at naomi. “just go back to bed, it’s probably like a deer or something.” daniel “what are you guys whining about?” daniel groaned, wiping his eyes before propping himself up on his elbows. “there’s no one out there, naomi. stop trying to freak everyone out – that’s my job.” blair “naomi thinks she sees someone outside,” blair hummed.

naomi shook her head. “does a deer stand upright on it’s two legs?! i’m not messing around this time, idiots.” she looked out the window once more only to see that whatever was out there was now gone. “i’m gonna go make sure the door is locked.” verena cursed under her breath and stood, rubbing her eyes. “fine, let’s go get this over with so i can return to my much needed sleep.” nodding towards the door, vee walked out of the room and into the living room. naomi followed verena into the living room. “it’s so cold in here.” she went to flip the light switch on but nothing happened. “okay… storm must of knocked it out. which direction is the door in again? i feel so disoriented.” daniel groaned, leaning forward and watching as the two girls left into the living room. “hope they have a flashlight.” he mumbled. “think we should check it out with them?” he asked blair. blair groaned. “probably, but can we not?” 

daniel “at least if we hear them scream, we can get a head start running.” blair “that’s not funny,” she huffed.  verena covered her mouth as she yawned a pointed in the direction of the door. “or the boogie man outside could have cut the power.” vee teased the other, a tired giggle escaping her lips.

naomi “ha ha very funny.” she walked around the corner towards the door, stopping in her tracks as she realized it was wide open. “uh… vee?” she called out, not moving from her spot. 

verena crossed her arms over her chest, her hands rubbing her arms in an attempt to warm them up. “yeah, what’s wrong?”   naomi “the door. it’s like, wide open.” she took a step back, “did anyone leave? did you hear anyone get up?” verena stepped up to stand beside naomi, her confusion only growing with every passing second. “i don’t think so… i know you said no more scary jokes, but this happens in horror movies.” blair “guys?” blair called, leaning to try and see out the door.  naomi ignored verena and walked back to the room. “is everyone in here?” she asked blair and daniel, “the front door is like, open.” blair bolted up in the bed. “what do you mean open?” daniel reached over and grabbed a flashlight before rising from the bed. “it was open?” he furrowed his brows, turning on the flashlight and looking around. “maybe someone went to get fresh air and forget to close it.” blair “is it still raining?” naomi shook her head “no it’s not raining anymore. is everyone in here?” she repeated, squinting to try to see how many bodies she could count. “vee is still out there in the living room, you should go check if anyone is outside.” she told daniel. blair “well maris is right here,” she pointed right next to the bed. “And I think that’s bryce,” she nodded to the person next to damaris. “i’ll go with you.” naomi “micah was next to me… where’s cristian?” she asked, realizing he was the only one missing. daniel “yeah, i can do that.” he nodded. “but it’s probably just cristian playing a prank.” verena took a few steps closer to the door, her eyes searching for anyone who might be outside the cabin. “hello? if you’re playing a prank, this isn’t funny!” blair “maybe he’s in the bathroom?” blair suggested. naomi “i’ll go check” she turned and walked back into the hallway, going into the bathroom and opening the door only to find it empty. “he’s not in here.” she called out, making her way back to the room. verena heard the crunch of gravel as if someone were walking around. “fuck this.” she murmured under her breath before shutting and locking the front door and hurrying back to the room. “well, there is definitely someone out there. is everyone here cause i shut and locked the door.” 

daniel “everyone but cristian and if he’s not in here, we’ve gotta find him.” he shrugged. “i’ll just run out and take a look, okay?” blair grabbed daniel’s hand at verena’s comment. “i don’t want you going out there.” naomi “i’m with blair on this one. i don’t think you should go out there. not alone at least.” 

verena “well, we can’t leave him out there. come on daniel, i’ll go with you.” daniel “wow, you two haven’t agreed on anything since that time you both had a crush on me.” he chuckled. “i’ll only be a second and you guys can watch from the door.” naomi rolled her eyes. “not the time to be cracking jokes. we’ll all go.” she reached for verena’s hand “if anything happens i may or may not use you as a human shield.” daniel “fine,” he shrugged, nodding. “us four will go out and the other three stay." blair “if we all go, who’s going to watch the door inside?” she went over and made sure the others were awake enough to be aware before going back to the door. “Okay, why don’t you two go that way and we’ll go this way?”

verena “so help me god naomi if you even try to sacrifice me, i will haunt you for the rest of your pitiful, over dramatic life.” when verena said that she needed her sleep, this was why. naomi “sorry” she whispered, taking a step back into the hallway “c'mon let’s go” daniel “wait!” he called out, rushing back into the bedroom and searching through his bag. he then return to the living room. “walkie talkies.” hr smirked, passing one over to verena. “should we decide on code names?” blair “seriously?” she huffed. “why do we need code names besides to satisfy your nerd fantasies?” verena smiled and took a walkie talkie from daniel. it may sound silly, but she loved using them, she always felt so bad ass and tactical. “call me the blue falcon!” naomi gave verena a look. “seriously? fine but if something happens i’m not repeating that dumbass code name.” blair covered her face with her hand. “please don’t encourage him.” verena “fine you party poopers keep thinking about how were all gonna die and stress yourselves out while daniel and i are play capture the flag– or in this case, the cristian, in our heads.” daniel “i’m with verena on this one,” he shrugged, shooting blair a quick ‘im sorry’ look. “the sooner we bust his little prank, the sooner we can go back to bed.” blair “fine,” she grumbled, taking his hand. “let’s just hurry up?” verena “that’s the spirit blair! now let’s go before we all freeze to death.” turning the flash light on her phone, vee opened the front door and waited for others to join her before exiting. damaris it took damaris a long time to wake up enough to realize that something was going on, but, unable to ignore the rummaging and muffled voices any longer ( especially when she heard cristian’s name - not that she would ever admit to any /concern/ ) she left her bed behind. tiptoeing through the room so as not to disturb bryce or micah, she followed the voices, appearing by blair’s side, “what’s goin’ on?” blair turned to damaris. “stay here, okay? keep the door closed until we get back.” naomi “door was open, cristian’s gone and i think it’s gonna start raining again.” she briefly explained as damaris showed up “we’re gonna go check out, see if cris was playing a joke.”

damaris “uhm…” she was inclined to do just that, but, naomi’s explanation had her a little less willing, “/gone/ gone?- why would he- he would’ve told one of the guys if he was planning a joke, right?- i want to help you guys look.”

daniel extended his walkie talkie towards damaris. “take this to keep in contact with us while we’re out there just in case.” he nodded. “we should be back in a few minutes.”

naomi “i think it’s best if she comes with. you know, more backup just in case we run up on something unpleasant.”

damaris “see? naomi thinks i should go too,” she turned up the offer of the walkie talkie to straighten up, a little, trying to look as if there was no room for argument. daniel “all five of us don’t need to be out there.” he urged, shaking his head. “we need someone here on look out and neither bryce or micah are any use to us if they’re sleeping.”

damaris “you’d wanna go if it was blair,” the words had left her before she’d even fully thought them through. she scrambled, then, to save it- “i mean- i’d rather stick close to the people who’re awake, than the ones i’m pretty sure wouldn’t wake up, even if i was screaming in fear.” blair “mar we really need someone to hold down the fort. it’s the most important job right now – please? ”naomi “damn. let her go look after her man. i’ll stay.” daniel rolled his eyes as a sigh fell from his lips. “fine — naomi stays, damaris goes. is that alright with everyone?”

damaris “he’s not my man,” she muttered, internally struggling with the idea of staying behind, as much as she struggled with staying steadfast in her decision to go, “naomi can..- she can go. give me the walkie and i’ll stick with bryce, but just– just find him. and kick his butt, if this is all a joke.”

daniel “look, i’m leaving.” daniel mumbled as he started off towards the door. “and whoever is coming can follow, but i’m not gonna stand around and waste time – i’m too fuckin’ tired for this.” blair clenched his hand tighter. “let’s go.” damaris “you go, naomi-” taking a step back into the room, she paused, before adding, “stay safe, all of you.” naomi felt bad for her. “you sure?” she asked as daniel and blair made their way out the door. damaris no, she thought, but instead she gave a tiny nod, “of course. i’ll wake bryce up and we’ll hold things down here- you go catch up with those two, and find cris!” verena smiled weakly at maris, grabbing naomi’s hand and giving it a tug. “come on naomi lets go get this over with so we can come back and joke about it!” blair “you’re too tired to argue but you had no problem making up code names,” blair hissed at daniel. daniel “code names are required when using walkie talkies.” daniel grumbled. blair “you’re a fucking adult, daniel. we don’t need codenames.” she let out a sigh as she looked around. “wait… wasn’t the van…” naomi gave damaris a small smile and let verena tug her outside. “yo, where’s the van?” she asked as she noticed that it wasn’t parked in the front anymore. blair turned to naomi. “it was right here, wasn’t it? i’m not imagining it?”

naomi “yeah for once i can confirm that you are not losing it.”

blair “anyone have their phone? did he text anyone?”

verena quickly checked her phone, shaking her head no. “Nope. But I don’t have service.”

daniel “you think he left?”

damaris unable to stick out waiting, damaris pressed in the button of the walkie talkie and spoke into it, “what’s going on- did you find him?”

blair grabbed the walkie out of daniel’s hand. “mar, did cristian text any of us?”

damaris “no. no, i don’t think so- why?”

blair “babe, where’s your phone?” daniel “i left it inside i think, but i’m pretty sure i never got anything from him.

”blair “naomi, how about you?”

naomi “nope, nothing. or at least i didn’t hear my phone go off.” blair “so he just… ditched?” naomi “probably, it wouldn’t be surprising if he did.” naomi looked over blair’s shoulder as she saw something moving behind her. “or he’s hiding out there.” her finger pointed towards where she saw the shadow. daniel looked over to where naomi was pointing before taking off in that direction. “hey asshole!” he called out. “shitty joke, man!” blair “babe!” she hissed. “what if it’s not him?” her eyes widened at the thought and she reached out, grabbing daniel. naomi “cristian this isn’t funny! where the hell is the van?!” she called out after daniel, separating from verena and walking closer in that direction. “he’s being immature. and it’s not funny.” daniel pulled his arm away as blair reached for him, too determined to catch up to whatever it was he was chasing. “dude, give it up!” he called out once more. “your prank sucks ass.” naomi looked over at daniel “i’m gonna go kick his ass, join me if you want.” she made her way down the small drive way, turning the flashlight on and pointing it where the trees were “hide and seek is not so fun when you have a very cranky girl after you!” blair “guys, seriously, if this is a prank let’s just go inside and lock him out, then we’ll have the last laugh.

naomi after not getting a reply, naomi rolled her eyes and sighed loudly, now walking closer “not cute” she flashed the flashlight all around her until she saw the same figured and she let out a laugh “okay idiot, i found you. stop being a creep and come back to the cabin.” still no response. naomi’s eyebrows furrowed and she took a few steps closer “cristian, seriously c'mon.” now she was feeling scared, the way cristian was being unresponsive— well if it even was him. maybe something had happened to him and naomi was talking to some freak. she was now close enough to touch him and she did just that, arm raising to tap him on the shoulder, only for the person to turn around. it wasn’t cristian. naomi let out a loud scream, dropping the flashlight as she turned around and ran back in the direction of the cabin. blair was doing her best to pull daniel back into the house as naomi made her way over to where they thought cristian was. “babe, please,” she begged. when naomi screamed, her eyes shot up. daniel was busy going back and forth with blair when he heard a scream from naomi. “what the hellbeas that?” he questioned, furrowing his eyebrows as he moved to go towards naomi. “what’s wrong?”

naomi pushed past daniel and blair, opening the door to the cabin only to find herself tripping over the rug and falling to the floor. “ow, fuck.” she groaned, laying on the floor as she waited for the other two to come in. “oh my god shut the door and lock it!”

blair followed her as quick as she could, pulling daniel into the cabin and slamming the door shut. “what the hell?!” damaris hearing the thud of naomi hitting the floor, damaris jumped up and hopped over bryce’s sleeping form, rushing out into the main room of the cabin. “what happened? where’s cris?” 

daniel was more confused than ever, looking down at naomi as he was rushed back into the cabin. “what the fuck is going on?”

naomi didn’t feel like getting up and she rested on her elbows, looking at everyone as she tried to catch her breath. “cristian… that wasn’t him” she said, swallowing the lump in her throat “i told you guys there was someone out there!”

daniel “so wait–” he began, trying his best to keep up. “that person out there – it wasn’t cristian?”

damaris “there was someone out there?” she felt so out of the loop, staring back and forth between everyone present, “naomi- what just happened?”

blair “well, i’m fucking done,” she insisted, throwing her hands up and going to get her phone.

daniel “it was probably just someone trying to freak us out.”

naomi “i thought cristian was being a dumbass so i went after him. i kept calling his name but he wouldn’t reply so i like… tapped him and…” she looked up at daniel “really? who? who would do that?” she shook her head and continued with her story “i tapped him and when he turned around, well it wasn’t him.”

damaris “and whoever it was, is still out there?- you left cristian out there, with whoever it was you thought was him?” she didn’t mean to sound so accusatory- she was just /scared/, “someone needs to call him. we should have done that from the start, someone- who has reception?”

blair “he’s not here,” blair groaned, walking back over to them. “the van was gone and we’re all here so chances are, he ditched.”

naomi shook her head “he wasn’t out there, damaris. i didn’t see the truck and if he was around, then he would have came over here the second he heard me scream. he might be an asshole but… okay yeah what blair said. he ditched.”

damaris “cristian wouldn’t just ditch us. if the vans gone, maybe..- maybe he’s just gone… for gas? or..- or food, or something. he wouldn’t ditch- why aren’t any of you trying to call him? i-” shaking her head a few too many times, damaris turned on her heel and stalked off to the room to get her phone, throwing over her shoulder, “i’ll do it, he’ll- he’ll pick up and he’ll explain. he wouldn’t ditch us.”

blair looked over at damaris and then over at daniel. “maybe he went to get some food or something but he didn’t leave a note or even a text, did he?”

daniel “he ditched, that’s all there is to it.” daniel sighed out, shaking his head. “i don’t know who or what was out there, but let’s just try to relax.”

naomi “i wanna go home now. good guy, that cristian.” she sarcastically commented, getting up and dusting herself off.

blair “i’m with naomi. can we please go home?”

damaris “for the last time- cristian wouldn’t ditch, okay? he wouldn’t leave us here like this,” she returned with her phone in hand, though, it was utterly useless- there were no bars, “we can’t go home without the van, unless you want to pay the huge taxi far we’d be facing.”

blair “i’ll pay for whatever you want if we can just leave.”

naomi sighed “i don’t know and i don’t care.” she walked to the kitchen, trying to find something to drink when she saw a note on the table “uh, guys? there’s a note on the table.” she called out, reaching for the small sheet of paper.

damaris “see? he left a note- what’s it say, naomi? he went to get something, right?”

naomi read the note and gave damaris a small smile “ ‘decided to leave without you losers. see you in silverwood.’ it says.”

daniel “i knew that jackass was up to something.” daniel grumbled, clenching his jaw for a moment. “well, i’m going back to sleep. i’ve had enough for the night.

”blair “it still doesn’t explain why there’s someone outside.”

naomi “or the lights being cut off.”

damaris “he ditched.” even having as little trust in cristian as she did, damaris hadn’t thought that he would leave them. she’d still, somehow, thought he was better than that- and now, her expression fell. “guess you guys were right. i’m…-” she shook her head and gave the most uncaring shrug she could muster at blair and naomi’s words, “doesn’t matter. the lights probably just went out, the person could’ve been a hiker- there’s explanations for everything, guys.”

daniel “it was probably just a homeless person.” he tried to reason, willing to saying almost anything at this point to get them to calm down. “let’s just go to sleep and get the hell out of here in the morning.”

blair wasn’t convinced. “why would there be a homeless person all the way out here when there’s a town right there?” she gestured back in the direction of marblemount.

naomi “exactly. and how exactly are we gonna leave? he took the van. unless you suggest hiking out of here.”

daniel “well, it’s not like we can uber out there.” he rolled his eyes. “can you guys just drop it, please?”

blair “drop what exactly? the fact that our friend ditched us? that there’s some creep walking around outside? that we have no way home? which part am i dropping?”

naomi hesitated before jumping in to their argument “maybe daniel’s right. let’s just get more rest and talk about it tomorrow. y'know when we’re not running on three hours of sleep.”

blair spun around. “of course you’d agree with him! go ahead then, go to sleep while some random guy stalks us outside.” she turned back to face daniel. “better yet, why don’t you guys share the bed so you’ll be comfortable before we die.”

daniel shut his eyes, sighing as she dragged on. "blair, c'mon..." he groaned. "we're safe inside, there's nothing to worry about. and we'll handle cristian when we get to silverwood."

naomi ignored blair "yup. lock the doors and everything. we're sleeping in the same room so if something happens we can just... attack it as a group versus staying up all night and having no energy to put up a fight so." she put the note down "i'm going back to sleep. on the floor."

blair stood with her arms crossed. "we're not going to silverwood."

daniel "we are." daniel then started back towards the bed. "now let's go to sleep for fuck's sake."

blair squinted at him, getting angrier by the second, but had to contain it as she followed daniel back into the room where people were sleeping.

[hislittlesecret-phff]

Chapter Two

A/N: It’s been quite a while, but I’ve finally written a bit more to the story. I’m very excited to see where this story takes me, but in the mean time - enjoy xx

I know it’s been a while, so you can read chapter one here

“Daddy?”

Harry grunted slightly as the small voice snatched him from his dreams. He twitched, then rolled over, and finally his eyes opened and fixed on the tiny silhouette in the doorway, highlighted by the moonlight from the window. Harry frowned - Maisie’s cheeks looked shiny, as though they were glistening with tears.

“What is it, honey?” he mumbled, propping himself up on his elbow.

“I had a bad dream.”

“A bad dream?” he said, feeling delirious with sleepiness.

“I normally go and sleep with Mummy if I have a bad dream.”

“Come on then, Maisie,” he murmured, holding an arm out. Maisie hurried over and clambered onto the bed, her favourite Dalmatian cuddly toy cuddled to her. Once on the mattress, Harry curled an arm round her tiny body and hugged her to him.

“Okay now?”

“Yeah,” Maisie said, snuggling into him. “It was a horrible dream.”

“Yeah? Don’t think about it now, darling.”

Maisie was silent for a while, and Harry absently stroked her ginger hair, already falling back under, back into the dream he was having.

“Daddy?”

“Huh?” He awoke suddenly again, then remembered where he was. “Yes, baby?”

“Why isn’t Mummy coming back?”

He frowned. “Did Granny not tell you?”

“She did, but I can’t remember why.”

“Mummy’s been specially chosen,” he murmured, stroking her auburn locks in an attempt to sooth her to sleep. “God chose her to become an angel.”

“Oh yeah,” Maisie said, then snuggled down into the bed. “Why Mummy?”

“Because Mummy was the perfect person to become an angel,” he said, laying back down and trying not to close his eyes. “This way she can look after you all the time, even when she’s not here.”

“She’s never here.”

“Exactly, but she’s looking after you even now.”

Maisie seemed to consider this - she was silent for a while. So silent that Harry nearly dosed off again.

“What are we doing tomorrow, Daddy?”

“Um…I was thinking we go shopping. Get you some nice food. Get you a new school uniform. Yeah?”

“Okay.”

“But we need to get some sleep to do that,” he said. “Otherwise we’ll be too sleepy. So try and get some sleep now, baby.”

“Okay,” she said.

Finally, with Harry gently caressing the top of her head and softly soothing her into her dreams, she fell back into unconsciousness, and Harry, relieved, copied.

“Daddy, look!”

Maisie let go of his hand to run over to the toys, pointing to a cuddly Mickey Mouse sat on the shelf.

“May,” he said warningly, hurrying after her. He was wearing a cap and sunglasses in an attempt to disguise his identity, and he didn’t want to attract any unnecessary attention by having a child running around in the supermarket. He followed her and took her hand again as she examined the cuddly toy.

“Isn’t he great?” she said, beaming up at him.

“You can put it on your Christmas list, maybe Santa will get it for you,” he said, grinning.

She pouted.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he said, winking at her. She giggled. He and Maisie had always had a playful father-daughter relationship. She liked to tease him, and mock him, and so he returned it. She found it hilarious. “Do you want some sweets?”

“Yeah!” she said, immediately forgetting about Mickey and running off in the other direction.

“Maisie,” he said instantly, and she froze. “I told you, don’t run off. Hold my hand.”

She reluctantly slipped her fingers back through his, but she basically dragged him to sweetie aisle, where she then spent ages picking between Haribo Starmix or Haribo Tangfastics. Harry grinned.

“Well, how about we get Starmix for you and Tangfastics for me?” he said, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah!”

“But I have to have some too,” he said. ‘They’re not all for you, okay?”

“Maybe,” she said cheekily, then giggled at the outraged expression on his face.

“You little-“ he began, then started tickling her - although she instantly screeched hysterically, and he stopped. “Shh! I told you, we need to be quiet in case someone spots Daddy.”

“Sorry,” she said, taking his hand once more and quietly skipping along as they moved to the next aisle. Harry was looking at health drinks when his phone started ringing.

“Who’s that, Daddy?” Maisie asked, as he balanced the basket on the crook of his arm and frowned at the screen.

“It’s just Edward,” he said. “Wait here, May,” he added, as she made to wander off, then he answered the call. “Hello?”

“Harry?”

“Who else?”

“Is Maisie with you?”

“Yeah, we’re in Tesco’s right now.”

“Okay, when you get home we need to talk.”

“Um…okay? I’ll have to bring Maisie though-”

“No, it’s okay, I’ve spoken to William. He’s going to go round yours and sit with her while you’re gone.”

“You told William?”

“To be honest, Harry, I expected him to already know.”

William was the only other person in the world, aside from Edward, Eve’s family and a handful of Eve’s friends, who knew that Maisie was Harry’s daughter. William had never met her, though, so Harry’s first thought was how Maisie would react to being left with a strange man, regardless of whether he was her uncle or not.

“Okay Maisie,” Harry said, once they’d arrived home and had put the shopping away. “I need to go and speak to Edward now.”

“Can’t you speak to him on the tellyphone?”

“I can’t, he wants to see me in person. So my brother’s going to come and look after you. Uncle William, remember me talking about him?”

She hesitated, then nodded. “I fink so.”

“Good, well he’s going to come and sit with you for a bit while I’m gone, is that okay? Will you be okay with that?”

Maisie shrugged, then nodded. “Okay.”

“Thanks, darling,” he said, kissing the top of her head. “I just need to wait for him to arrive, and then I’ll go round and see Edward.”

“Edward’s scary,” Maisie said.

“Edward?’ Harry said, frowning.

Her ginger head bobbed in a nod. “Yeah, he looks really mean.”

“Nah, Ed’s nice,” he answered, turning the TV on for her. “But I guess he can be a bit strict. He can get angry sometimes.” He trailed off, then made a face, making her giggle. “Don’t be scared of Edward, he’ll be nice to you.”

There was a knock on the door. Harry hurried to answer it.

“Hi,” William said, raising an eyebrow.

“I wanted to tell you that she was coming to live with me,” he replied in a rush. “But I didn’t have a chance-”

“Don’t worry about it,” William said, grinning. “I’m just happy for you. I mean-“ His smile disappeared. “-the whole thing is terrible. Edward was telling me earlier.”

“Do you know what he wants to talk to me about?” Harry asked, as they made their way through the apartment.

“No clue,” William said, and then they stepped into the living room.

“Maisie, come here,” Harry said tentatively, and as the little girl clambered off the sofa, he added, “This is Uncle William.”

He watched William’s reaction - of course, he’d seen pictures of her before, so he wasn’t surprised by how much she looked like Harry, but he was shocked by how pretty she was. She was a very pretty little girl, she would be envied for her hair when she got a bit older, and she was very cute. Her eyes were very big and very blue, and they were also very wide as she peered up at William shyly, moving towards Harry to reach for his hand.

“Hey Maisie,” William said, crouching down so he was on her eye-level. He held out a hand. “I’m your Uncle William.”

She hesitated, then shook his hand. “Hello,” she said, in her lisp.

“I’m glad to finally meet you,” William said gently, smiling at her. “Your daddy’s told me lots about you. He said that you’re very pretty, but that sometimes you’re a bit naughty.”

He said it to make her laugh - she smiled sheepishly, and he chuckled.

“Just a bit naughty?” Harry quoted, grinning. “She’s the worst.” He winked down at her, and Maisie giggled lightly. “Okay, you alright if I go now, Maisie?”

She nodded once. “Bye Daddy.”

He bent over and kissed the top of her head. “See you in a minute, baby.”

Harry had no worries about leaving Maisie with William - he knew his brother would do everything to make her laugh and make her comfortable. That left all the space in his head to be concerned about Edward, and what his secretary had to say to him.

Edward was sat at his desk in his office, and he looked up as Harry entered.

“What’s up?” Harry asked. “What’s so important?”

“We need to talk.”

Harry collapsed into the chair opposite him and raised an eyebrow, then laughed. “Seriously? Every time someone has said that to me, the conversation that followed did not end well.”

Edward laughed too. “I know, don’t worry, you’re not in trouble. We just need to discuss things.”

“About Maisie?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Hit me.”

Edward hesitated for a few moments, appearing to consider his words, then said, “You need to tell your family.”

Harry sighed; he’d been repressing those thoughts, just trying to enjoy his time with Maisie. “I know.”

“It needs to be soon,” Edward added. “How long do you think Maisie can live here, with you dropping her off at school every day, before the press start to catch wind?”

“I know,” he admitted, biting his lip.

“And your family must know before the press do,” he said.

“Yeah,” Harry said, then ran a hand over his face. “I truly don’t even know how to tell them. They’re not going to be happy.”

“I don’t know, sir,” Edward said. “All they need to do is spend five minutes with Maisie and she’ll wipe away all their doubt and ill-feeling. You know that.”

Harry was biting his thumbnail. He nodded absently. He hadn’t wanted to think about any of this yet, he was still trying to get used to having Maisie with him.

Meanwhile, back in the apartment, Maisie and William were sat on the sofa. Maisie was very shy now that Harry had gone, and so William tried to talk to her to get to know more about the little girl who was his niece.

“So Maisie,” he said, then looked at the TV screen. “You like Spongebob?”

Maisie nodded. “I like Squidward. He’s funny.”

“Squidward? The grumpy one with the big nose?”

She giggled, a high-pitched, musical sound. “Yeah.”

“Has Daddy told you about me?” William asked gently, curious.

“He said you’re his brother,” she said, still watching the TV.

“I am, I have two little kids of my own, your cousins,” he said, then pulled his phone out of his pocket. “This is George, he’s just a little younger than you, he’s three, and this is Charlotte.” He flicked through the pictures of them, smiling. “Oh, that’s my wife, Kate.”

“The princess!” Maisie cooed, looking delighted.

“You recognise her, huh?”

“Mummy said she was a real princess,” she said.

William watched her for a while. “Maisie, do you know who your Daddy is?”

“Mummy said he was a very important, famous person,” she explained, with a lisp. “He’s a prince of wales, so he’s only a prince when he’s in Wales.”

He laughed lightly. “Well, actually, Maisie, it’s probably best that you know. Daddy is actually a prince of the whole country. His grandmother - and my grandmother is the Queen.” He searched on Google – because it was quicker than trying to find one in his photos – for a picture of The Queen, and showed Maisie. “You know who this lady is?”

“The Queen,” Maisie said, throwing her arms up in delight at knowing who it was.

“Yeah, she’s mine and Daddy’s grandma,” he explained gently. “That means she’s your great-grandma.”

She stared at the screen for quite a while, then said, “Okay.”

He chuckled lightly. Maisie probably had no idea the importance of all this. “So my grandma is the Queen, and my daddy is going to be king one day. And then after my daddy, I’ll be king.”

“And then George?” Maisie asked curiously. He was impressed she’d remembered George’s name.

“Yeah, after me it’ll be George,” William said, grinning. “So you’re in a very important family, you know.”

Maisie turned back to SpongeBob, confused but too shy to ask him. William decided he’d probably told her too much to take everything in, so he sat back into the cushions and watched the show too.

“I love Patrick,” he said. “He’s just so funny.”

“He’s really silly,” Maisie agreed, with her lisp. William laughed, looking at her for a moment. She was so small, very tiny really, and very pretty with long auburn curls that fell over her shoulders. She looked like Harry, but at the same time she didn’t. She had some other features in there, features that must’ve been Eve’s. William wondered how Maisie was coping with losing her mum.

“Do you miss your Mummy?” William asked.

“Yes,” she said. “But Daddy said she was specially chosen to become one of the angels in Heaven.”

“Yeah, it’s a very special job,” he said gently. “My mummy was chosen too, mine and Harry’s.”

“Daddy told me,” Maisie said. “He said that your mummy was taken when you were nearly adults.”

“Yeah, we were both teenagers,” William said.

“Was your mummy a princess too?”

“She was,” he said, smiling. “She was the best kind of princess because all she wanted to do was help people, just like your Daddy does.”

Maisie was silent for a little while. “If Daddy’s a prince, do I need to curtsey to him?”

“Oh no, he’s only a prince to people who aren’t royalty,” William said, struggling to explain it in a way that would make her understand.

The sound of the front door opening sounded and Maisie jumped off the sofa, squealing in delight. “Daddy!” she cried, running out to greet him.

“Hey, May-May,”he said, scooping her into his arms and blowing raspberries on her cheek. Her giggles met William’s ears, and then Harry appeared in the doorway, Maisie sat on his hip. “Maisie, why don’t you go and choose a DVD to watch?” He placed her on her feet and she darted away. “How was it?”

“It was good, I was telling Maisie all about our family,” WIlliam said, then looked apprehensive. It only just occurred to him that maybe Harry was planning to do that. But Harry looked relieved.

“Thanks, I forgot I need to do that,” he said, then ran a hand over his beard and sighed. “Shit, William, there’s so much to do.”

“I guess Edward wanted to talk about a lot, huh?”

“I need to tell all the family, and quickly, because we’ll need to announce something before the press can figure out who she is. And I have no idea how the family are going to take it. I can hardly just phone them up and go ‘oh, by the way, Pa, I’ve had a daughter for the last four years’, can I?”

“Well, I’ll help you out as much as you can,” William said, then smiled. “I’ll look after her whenever you need me to. Me and Kate.”

“Have you told Kate?”

“I haven’t, can I?” He looked unsure. “I wasn’t sure whether it was still a secret from everyone.”

“Go ahead, that’s one less person I need to tell,” he said, sighing.

“Just get these next few weeks out of the way, of course it’s going to be tough,” William said, patting his shoulder. “But then you’ve got her forever now. Think of all the fun you two can have once everything is sorted out.”

Harry half-smiled at that. “You’re right. Thanks, William.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “Anyway, I’ll leave you two to it. Maybe you both could come over tomorrow for dinner? It’ll let us introduce Maisie to Kate and the kids.”

“Sure,” Harry said, sparing him a smile as his brother left the apartment. Maisie returned then, the Disney film Tangled clutched in her left hand, her cuddly Rapunzel doll in her right.

“Daddy, can we watch this?!” she asked excitedly, holding it up in the air.

“Only if we duet all the songs,” he said playfully, racing her over to the sofa. “I’ll be Eugene!”

She giggled delightedly. “And you need to be Pascal,” she cried. “Do the funny tongue thing!”

Harry laughed once, moving his face very close to hers and poking his tongue out quickly like a chameleon. She dissolved into giggles, making him chuckle.

As the film started, he pulled her onto his lap and cuddled her close, wishing that everything could just be sorted so that he could enjoy his new life with his daughter without the rest of his life getting in the way.