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angrydykeboy · 1 year ago

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angsty barbie draft, chapter 1

There's not enough angst in the glorbie tag yet so i'm creating some content. let me know if you like it and there might be a chapter two, in isolation rn so who knows. Basically Gloria and her mother have words with one another. CW for homophobia, side bangs, and child neglect.

Gloria's hair wouldn't sit right. Usually it behaved better but today she didn't have time for her full routine. Between literally dragging her thirteen year old out of bed, forcing clothes on her, and then cleaning up breakfast, she didn’t get a chance to take a breath until she was waiting for her mom to answer the door.

Usually Barbie helped in the mornings, did the cooking while she wrangled Sasha but she'd burned the eggs twice before Gloria pulled her away. Barbie was way too nervous about the day, and even while they waited on the porch she wouldn't stop biting her nails, a new habit Gloria would lecture her about eventually.

Even Sasha seemed on edge, slamming away on her phone like she had to text nuclear codes. Gloria didn't even have the time to blink these days with her new job, and these two looked like they were about to spontaneously combust.

The door swung open and her mother swept Sasha into a hug. Sasha, allergic to all human contact, didn’t even complain. She laughed and hugged back. They were laughing together.

Her mother, as usual, looked ridiculously put together: hair neatly styled out of her face, dyed so there aren’t any of the gray strands Gloria’s working with. Her blouse wasn't even wrinkled.

Her mother caught sight of Barbie and set Sasha down. “You must be Barbara,” she said. “Keith’s sister-in-law? Right?”

Gloria held her breath and Barbie smiled and held out her hand. “Absolutely, it is such a pleasure to meet you.”

Gloria’s mother pulled her into a hug too, scoffing at the outstretched hand.

She'd begged Barbie for weeks leading up this, and Sasha had fun coming up with Barbara’s whole background, going over flashcards over dinner. It was just how her mother was, Gloria had explained. The lie was necessary, at least until her mother got to know Barbie, which would be never plus ten years.

“Come in, come in” Gloria’s mom beckoned them inside. Gloria nodded at her as she passed and went to set her bag down on the couch.

“You were a little late so you missed the lunch I prepared but I was able to give it to my neighbor. She’s such a dear, she’s an artist, you’d like her, Sasha,” her mother continued. “But I’m so glad you’re finally here. Gloria, get some of those boxes out of the attic, will you? I was hoping you could go through them before you left.”

Gloria gave the best smile she could muster. “Sure, Mamá.”

“They might be heavy—where is that Keith, his sister could come but he couldn’t?”

“Work emergency,” Gloria said. “He said to send you his best.”

Her mother waved a hand. “He works too hard! I’ll send you back with some food for him. He could probably use some decent home-cooking for a change. Barbie how are you so thin? You too Sasha? Does your mother ever feed you?”

Sasha and Barbie both laughed and Gloria tried to laugh too, letting out a “nice one mom,” before heading to the attic to lift the boxes down herself.

They were mostly old photos, a few report cards, her CD collection, she flicked through them for awhile, sneezing occasionally from all the dust. It was nice getting some peace and quiet in her old room though. Her mother used it as a yoga studio now, and all of Gloria’s stuff was packed away. All waiting for her to go through and throw it away.

“How are you?”

Gloria looked up, catching sight of Barbie and smiled, perhaps for the first time that day. It’d only been an hour or two but she missed her, like always.

“Hey Barbie, I’m okay. This is just,” she exhaled, “a lot.”

“I came to check on you,” Barbie sat beside her and put a hand on her back. “Anything good?”

“Just some old stuff, nothing interesting,” Gloria held up a report card. “I got an A in math my freshman year.”

Barbie took it from her, examining it. “It’s crazy you have all these memories and this whole life, it’s like you’re a million people all at once.”

“What? High school?” Gloria shook her head. “All those hormones with also the worst sense of style of your life? Trust me, you dodged a bullet.”

“Maybe,” Barbie said. She pulled out another photo. “Hey who’s this?”

“Rodrigo, my first boyfriend,” Gloria looked at it. “We were cute together. I only started dating him to piss my mom off but she loved him.”

“So it’s a thing?” Barbie asked. “All daughters try to piss off their mothers?”

Gloria frowned. She’d—she’d had a reason. It wasn’t just angsty teen stuff like Sasha, it was real. It mattered.

“I don’t remember Sasha with that haircut,” Barbie said, pulling another photo out.

Gloria wore a cheesy smile at prom, arm around a pimpled kid who was too tall to also be skinny, and had a side bang that covered one whole eye. Underneath her big poofy purple skirt were likely her favorite pair of purple hightop converse she wore everywhere when she was seventeen.

Gloria laughed, “it’s me, look.”

Barbie gaped at the photo. “But you’re wearing smudgy eyeliner!”

Gloria nodded. “Yup.”

Barbie laughed. “Oh, I am so showing Sasha this!” She bounced up and Gloria ran after her, following Barbie’s giggles down the stairs where Sasha and her mom were hugging on the couch.

“What’s—what’s all this?” Gloria asked, coming to a stop at the bottom of the stairs.

“Mom,” Sasha beamed, her eyes shining a little. “I just came out to Grandma!”

Gloria’s stomach dropped. “What?”

“She said she loves me no matter what, and even wants to meet Jade. Can I bring her next time?”

“Um—“ Gloria stared at her mother, who was also beaming, at Sasha, “Great. Yeah.”

“Sasha, look at this photo your mom and I found,” Barbie bounded forward, and the two of them started laughing, talking excitedly with Gloria’s mom, and Gloria could only stare at her mother.

“I’m sorry what?” Gloria stepped forward. “That’s it?”

Her mother blinked at her. “What?”

“Mom, it’s fine,” Sasha said. “We’re not in a Hallmark movie, I didn’t want her to make a big deal out of it.”

“You’re cool with it?” Gloria asked her mom. “Really? Just fine with it now?”

“It’s 2023,” her mother said. “Who am I to judge?”

“You said it was fine, Mom,” Sasha cut in. “Do you have a problem?”

“Of course not,” Gloria said. “Sasha, I love you no matter what. You know that. I’m just a little confused as to when this happened.” She gestured to her mother.

“When what happened?” Sasha demanded.

“You can’t talk to your daughter that way,” her mother said. “They’re born that way.”

“Since when do you quote Lady Gaga?” Gloria demanded. “You’ve hated gay people since I was fifteen. You wouldn’t even let me play Ricky Martin at my quinceñera!”

“I don’t have a problem with the gays, I love Ricky Martin, and Lady Gaga,” Her mother crossed her arms.

“Is Ricky Martin gay?” Barbie whispered to Sasha.

“I have no idea who that is,” Sasha responded.

“So it was just me then?” Gloria asked. “Sending me to live with Abuelita and telling me not to come back without a boyfriend was what? A whim?”

“Whoa, Mom, what?”

“Do be dramatic. I sent you to live with Abuelita because you were forgetting your Spanish,” her mother waved a hand. “It was only a month.”

“It was three years,” Gloria said. “I had to switch schools, you didn’t even call me on my birthday!”

“Enough,” her mother said. “It’s all in the past. Let’s just focus on Sasha, huh? This is her moment.”

Sasha looked between them and Gloria tried to take a deep breath, tried to ground herself.

“You’re right,” Gloria swallowed. “Sasha, congratulations.”

“Right,” Sasha said. She looked at Barbie.

“You have a lovely home,” Barbie said.

Gloria’s mother smiled. “You are just as sweet as your brother. See, I knew you would marry into a good family Gloria, I can’t have been that terrible. You met a good man, like I said you would. And now you have Sasha.”

“What does you sending her away have to do with Sasha?” Barbie asked. Genuinely too. Gloria wanted to hug her.

“Did you really send her away, Abuela?” Sasha asked.

“Of course not,” her mother said. “Gloria, look what you’ve started now. All daughters hate their mothers, Sasha.”

Gloria looked at her phone. “It’s almost four, I have to be back home to start making dinner.”

“Let me grab you the plate I saved for Keith!” Her mother rushed to the kitchen and Gloria grabbed her bag.

“So we’re not getting takeout like usual?” Sasha asked.

Her mother came back in with the plate, handing it to Barbie before giving Sasha another big hug. Gloria headed out to the car before she had to watch it.

When the two of them got in Barbie was still holding the plate. Enchiladas. She’d literally never made Gloria enchiladas once, not even when she was a kid and her mother still spoke Spanish around her.

Gloria took the plate from Barbie, getting out of the car and slamming the door behind her. She got why Sasha did it, it was satisfying.

She walked to the driveway where the two trash cans were waiting for the garbage truck.

Barbie and Sasha watched her walk back, empty handed.

They drove in silence for a while, Gloria gripping the wheel with white knuckles. She felt Barbie’s and Sasha’s eyes never waver, burning a whole into her rapidly graying head.

“Did Abuela really send you away?” Sasha asked again.

Gloria took another deep breath. “Is anyone else starving? I could really go for some baleadas. Let’s go to a grocery store on the way home.”

Grocery shopping was silent, not like Gloria expected it be talkative but Barbie and Sasha were making eye contact the whole time as Gloria looked up the recipe.

“I’ve never had baleadas before,” Barbie sounded the word out carefully as they walked down the ethnic food aisle.

It was mostly Asian with a few cans of refried beans at the end that Gloria grabbed. She'd never noticed how lacking their local grocery store was. It had to be stocked better than this, right?

“What is it?” Barbie asked.

“What? Of course you've had them,” Gloria waved a hand. “I make them all the time.”

“They’re like soft thick tacos with sour cream,” Sasha explained.

“I made them like a week ago,” Gloria said.

“That was like, my tenth birthday,” Sasha said.

“No, there was three of us, Barbie had to have been there,” she said.

“It was Dad,” Sasha said.

Gloria knit her brow. “Oh, you’re right. I guess it has been a minute. Hope I still remember it!”

She tried to get chipper for the ride home but even Barbie was dubious, and refused to play along.

She went straight to the kitchen and got to work, blasting Selena as loud as possible. They stayed quiet all through dinner, even though Gloria totally crushed it. The food was fucking fantastic.

“You know what’s overrated?” Gloria asked around a bit of the taco. “Yoga. It’s not even actual exercise it’s just really sweaty and smelly. What do you think is overrated, Barbie?”

“High heels?” Barbie suggested.

Gloria nodded. “Totally, high heels suck.”

“How about skipping therapy,” Sasha said.

“Great Sasha, thanks so much,” Gloria threw down her napkin.

“Calling it like I see it,” Sasha said.

“‘Thanks for spending an hour on this meal Mom, this was really delicious Mom—‘“

“So I’m supposed to thank you for keeping me alive?” Sasha asked.

“God would you give it a rest?” Gloria asked. “For just two seconds imagine what it would’ve been like for me, and just imagine you were someone who felt grateful. Ever.” She stood up. “I’m going for a walk.”

She left but it was only minutes later that Barbie was at her side, as usual.

“I can walk ten feet behind you and pretend we’re walking separately,” Barbie said. “If you want space.”

Gloria smiled and took her hand, pushing down the butterflies she always got. “Thanks for coming.”

“Sasha’s just confused,” Barbie said. “She’s not trying to stress you out or anything.”

“I know,” Gloria said. “I just don’t need anyone telling me how to live my life right now. Not with Keith gone.”

Barbie hummed and they took a couple blocks in companionable silence, listening to the sound of distant cars along the highway.

“You never told me that stuff about your mom, living with your grandparents,” Barbie said. She squeezed Gloria’s hand.

“Abuelas are important,” Gloria said. “I didn’t wanna ruin it for Sasha.” She sighed. “I guess I failed at that too, huh?”

“What do you mean?” Barbie asked.

“I don’t know,” Gloria sighed. “Failed at being a daughter, a wife, and now mother? It’s like—what’s even the point.”

“You have not failed at those things,” Barbie stopped her. “You go to that house twice a month just to do chores while Sasha gets to have fun. You’re a great daughter. And Keith and you separated together, so that you both could be better parents. You haven’t failed at any of those things.”

Gloria shook her head. “I’m not sure my mother would agree with you.”

“Who cares what she thinks, she’s the failure. You’d never send Sasha away just for liking girls like she did.”

Gloria stepped back, moving her hand away. “What? I don’t—I don’t like girls.”

Barbie’s eyebrows furrowed. “But she told you not to come back until you got a boyfriend, wasn’t it because you liked girls?”

“I mean then,” Gloria said. “It was just a stupid phase in high school. Like my eyeliner.”

“Do you think it’s like eyeliner for Sasha?” Barbie asked.

“That’s different!” Gloria said. She was shouting. Why did all these deep breaths feel like she was hyperventilating? “That’s different.”

Barbie’s eyebrows stayed furrowed. “Can you tell me how it’s different?”

“I had a husband, I have a kid,” Gloria said. “I’m just a mom.”

“You’re not just a mom,” Barbie said. “You’re Gloria.”

Gloria swallowed.

“You can be anything,” Barbie said. “That’s why you’re one of the best toy designers at Mattel. That’s why Sasha always write about you when they ask her to write essays about who her hero is. That’s why only you were able to stop Ken. Who cares what your mom thinks?”

“Does Sasha really write about me?” Gloria asked.

“If you tell her I told you she will literally kill me,” Barbie said. “But of course she did. You singlehandedly saved Barbieland. You’re my hero too.”

“We saved Barbieland together,” Gloria said. She took Barbie’s hand. “Thank you. I needed to hear that.”

Barbie squeezed her hand. “Anytime.”

The familiar butterflies came up, and Gloria tried not to squash them, just this once. “You mean that?” She asked.

“Of course,” Barbie said. “Forever.”

Gloria leaned against her as they walked, and wondered.

#glorbie #gloria barbie #barbie 2023 #the barbie movie #sasha barbie #gloria x barbie #barbie x gloria #glorbie fanfiction #it's good shit guys okay #read it please it would make me happy #i've looked over it now twice so there should literally be zero errors #i'm too much of a chicken shit to post this on my main tumblr so hopefully you guys like a side blog #putting yourself out there is scary

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mooremars · 1 year ago

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Visual Things In Camelot That I Love and Need Documented for Reasons:

Act 1 Scene 1: A hilltop near the castle at Camelot

• The first time I saw all the knights coming up over the back of the stage I gasped, it just sets the epic tone very well

• The entirety of the physicality of I Wonder What the King is Doing Tonight, instantly endearing how funny it is

• Arthur trying to hide when he sees Genny coming and then doing a very bad job sneaking away

• Genny making her stabbing motions on the bench in the Simple Joys of Maidenhood

• The look Arthur gives at the audience when Genny asks for his help, just the most incredulous thing

• This is the beginning of Arthur pushing his hair back constantly and I genuinely love this choice it just feels right

• Genny running around trying to escape Arthur's singing

• Tiny Genny walking around Arthur and 100% of her is rage while she names French poets

• Phillipa Soo doing the most absurd poses and face while she's hiding when the knights find Arthur and freaking out that he's the king

• It's hilarious and you can't even see it from plenty of seats but rest assured her limbs are climbing that little wall between the floor and the stage with enthusiasm

• Arthur's king posture, like obviously we see him first hiding in a tree and he's loevable for that but then we see him in king mode and you're totally in

• Also the look they share at the end of the reprise

Act 1, Scene 2: The King's study - one month later

• Arthur's discomfort that you read so clear when Genny calls him Your Majesty

• Arthur's face when Genny asks about courtesans, like he is so distressed

• Genny's little motion of some other place when she talks about extra women, unexpectedly funny

• And then his face so aghast as they talk about his legal right and how he thought she knew he was a decent fellow

• Genny's smirk when she says she can convincingly imitate Merlin mocking Arthur

• Arthur's joy and delight describing the eagle, he looks so boyish and it really sells him as a young king

• Arthur sarcastically walking around the room and making a show of it

• Arthur collapsing on the floor after he cynically proposes that human nature is bad like a toddler having a tantrum

• Then Genny regaly sitting down next to him

• Them pacing around together coming up with the round table, like obviously the point of the stage is that actors are supposed to move around each other in a very specific way but something about the way Arthur and Genny walk around the room/each other, it conveys how in sync they are mentally

• They more excited about the ideas and start walking faster and getting closer then walking away and I am bad at describing but it's good

• And their faces as they get more excited by the ideas, such nerds for good governance

• Arthur miming a round table

• When he almost kisses her at the end and stops himself

• The way they look at each other when he invites France and also when she says she knows he's a decent man, like they are so in love already

Act 1, Scene 3: The countryside outside of Camelot - six months later

• Like 99% of the Lancelot performance is his smug face and chest puffing

• It's so funny

• Every movement is so dramatic in C'est Moi and the scene that follows

• Blustering around the stage - while Arthur is literally unconscious - ranting about his devotion to Arthur and swinging the sword around

• Him dropping to the ground to apologize in the most dramatic way and then trying to do it again when Arthur mentions it again

• Arthur's motion for up you go like this performance has so much humor, it completely makes the show work

• The way Arthur puts his hand on Lance's shoulder and like stage whispers in his ear to tell him to keep the whole almighty favoring him bit to himself

• And then Arthur running back to stop him from continuing the song, a horrified run is not a thing I knew you could convey on stage but here we are

• There are images of Lance's armor but it blinding you in the face is its own experience

Act 1, Scene 4: A park near the castle

• The Lusty Month of May is masterful in every way

• Most of this is out there so all the amazing choreography and Phillipa Soo jumping around the stage are preserved thank goodness

• But but but, the knights thinking Genny has overheard them and waiting in dread and the moment she just pulls out the flowers is so funny

• Their faces go from terror to confusion so fast

• Also this is like extremely present throughout the show but the knights are doing the thing where they're having a philosophical discussion and pacing back in forth on the diagonal of the stage and I love this style

• The dress and flower crown, just perfect I want to be her

• Her face when Pelli mentions Morgan, oh the heartbreak

• But then when Arthur arrives and she starts playing with his buttons while asking him to stay for lunch, the cutest

• And then Arthur's face when Lance says that he doesn't think Genny would be interested in state matters, and really his face when Lancelot says most things in this scene is just a constant oh no

• The way Lance looks up and down the knights and says with work they can achieve a standard, what an asshole

• Take Me to the Fair is just genius

• Genny's pose trying to seduce the knights into being inspired to fight for her and their confused looks as they say they too want to impress the king, comedy gold

• Genny's various pretending to be crying, attempting to touch the knights while hiding her distaste for them, the dramatic movement when she's asking the knights to injure Lance in various ways

• The way she turns her head back when she sings Frenchman to Sagramore

• And all the little breakdowns are great but the disconnect him, vivisect him, open wide him, sub divide him one

• And then her fucking skipping around the stage with Lionel at the end, so so funny

• Every time Phillipa Soo jumps up in delight is a delight

Act 1, Scene 5: The King's study - the night before the tournament

• This scene is Lance's best look, fight me

• The hair up is a personal problem for me

• Also maybe Arthur's best look? I have to ponder that one, he has some solid outfits and crowns

• Arthur's proud stance when he tells Lancd that Genny wrote the treatise

• Genny and Pelli getting excited for Lance's defeat, giddy schoolchildren

• Speaking of giddy schoolchildren, Arthur's when he thinks there a book and then realizing there is not is very good and then he does it all over again

• The look between them when Genny basically dares him to command her to withdraw her permission and he says nothing

• Arthur looking lovesick holding Genny's flower

Act 1, Scene 6: A grandstand - the next day

• Arthur and Genny looking regal as hell, contenders for favorite costumes

• Arthur and Genny's faces as they watch the first two fights, he's so done and she's so rooting for Lance's downfall

• The sword choreography during the tournament, specifically Arthur and Lance fighting

• Arthur taking off his coat and his crown, why does this live so deep in my brain

• Seeing Arthur as a king not just of ideas but of combat skill, I just like it is why

• Arthur handing his sword to Lance when he starts his little baguette tactic

• And Arthur casually sitting down on the bench and grabbing the two swords and then Lance catching the second sword

• The two swords part is all perfect

• Again, the sword choreography is brilliant

• Obviously everyone looking at each other at the end of the scene

Act 1, Scene 7: The castle terrace - on the evening of the same day

• Genny's turn to the audience as she refuses to tell Lance he's being invested

• Also her dress is gorgeous

• Everyone looking and not looking at each other, everything is loaded in this one

• Like breaking news Phillipa Soo can fucking act, everything she does in Before I Gaze at You Again is masterful

Act 1, Scene 8: The great hall - on that evening

• Genny's outfit in this deserves a special special callout

• Arthur looking at Genny looking at Lance, is too much

• Arthur flinging off his cloak

• You can feel the anger in his body language so much

• Everything is on his face in this scene and it hits so hard

• He's just pacing around the stage by himself, it should be this compelling but it is

Act 2, Scene 1: The castle courtyard one year later:

• Genny running off during If Ever Would I Leave You and then coming back

• Also her dress is again stunning, back in France blue for her song with Lance

• I mean I don't have a lot to say because I feel like it's all in the delivery for Lance but it's a stunner

• Mordred skulking onto the stage from the stairs near the front and then flipping off his hood, so dramatic

• Mordred slamming his hands down on the bench when Pelli tells him to come back tomorrow, if the hot topic goths only knew about him...

• Arthur's smug look back at Mordred when he kills the whole secret thing

• Arthur's face when Mordred is being a little shit and he says "no you idiot"

• Another great Arthur outfit

• Mordred yelling fidelity at the direction Arthur exited from

• The entire Seven Deadly Virtues staging is fun

• They love a bit of choreography on a bench in this show and I agree, it's great

Act 2, Scene 2: The King's study

• Everything surrounding and including What Do the Simple Folk Do

• Not to start near the end but Arthur and Genny's dance is the cutest thing on this earth and when Arthur puts his hands on Genny's face at the end and is two seconds from finally kissing her, I am deceased

• Aaron Sorkin please, you have money and influence, let me have video of that dance

• They start out sort of awkward and then get into a rhythm when they're spinning each other around and squeeling as they make their way around the stage, so pure

• Specifically Arthur's little bow and Genny ignoring him so he just follows and when she spins him in and all the twirling

• Also his face when he tells her that she should absolutely not have encouragement at whistling

• And then back at the top, Arthur's face when he says he likes seeing Genny riled up, like he is just so into her it's unbearable

• The visual of them playing chess, Genny reading and Arthur pacing just makes their relationship feel so lived in and special

• They're both just acting the shit out of the whole scene

• But specifically their faces as they discuss Morgan and that they're business partners, and that Genny is sad sometimes are a million tiny heartbreaks

• And how she asks about Morgan and he just starts doing chess again before he answers, really the fact they're carrying on their chess game between lines

• The way Arthur looks at Genny when he says he name right after they discuss his obligation to Morgan and when he starts on his ill-fated love confession

• He looks so pleased with himself when he says business partners and like he shouldn't be but

• And even more specifically Phillipa Soo's face when Arthur says they're more than king and queen, she's so hopefully and I swear she shifts forward in the chair and then her face when he says business partners is soul destroying

• And then Arthur slapping his head into his hands when he realizes what a fuckup he's just perpetrated

• Every tortured facial expression as they fail to connect, as they say the wrong thing or push the other away breaks my heart

• Arthur and Genny's faces when Mordred says Lancelot is the queen's protection for that evening, like burning house this is fine meme in real life

• And on a better note, Arthur's that's an interesting question look, like his desire to engage with confusing things is very endearing

• Also some more good outfits

Act 2, Scene 3: The home of Morgan Le Fey/Guenevere's Chamber/ Castle corridor - on that evening

• The entire staging of Fie on Goodness

• Okay Aaron Sorkin, also this one please

• You know better make it a full performance, I'm actually thinking that I need everything on this list and that seems easier

• Specifically the way the actors move on and off the stage, both to the backstage and up and down the stairs by the front of the stage on either side, in and out of light

• I wish I could watch this number and hear the choreographer talk about specifically this scene because it feels like maybe there's also some purpose to who's still on stage but in shadow but it's hard to tell while it's happening

• Like Mordred is in the middle of some of the Arthur/Morgan parts and it made me curious

• The knights' shadows on the giant stage adds so much to the vibe like awards for whoever figured out the lights for this magnificent number

• And the way they're swinging around the furniture to transition between the Morgan and Arthur, the knights, and Lance and Genny

• It gives everything such urgency and movement and this frantic energy that matches the building tension

• The way they change the projections too, the bricks for the castle and the vines for Morgan

• Morgan's performance is so different from everything everyone else is doing and as soon as she walks on stage, the vibe changes

• And it shifts Arthur too, finally seeing him with the only person in the show (except Merlyn maybe, sort of unclear if he already knew him but wasn't his teacher or not but I digress) who knew him before he was king and he becomes angrier and rougher around the edges

• Also specifically when she says I don't give a damn and strolls offstage again is so good

• Genny pacing furiously while she tells Lance about what Arthur is doing and then her face when she agrees that Arthur doesn't see her as his wife, you can see her resolve snapping

• Modred being pushed off stage on the table

• Morgan spinning her globe(? okay it isn't but I can't remember what that thing is called) as she leaves gets me every time

• Arthur's face as he realizes what's happening and then his desperate run out

• This scene is an immaculate masterpiece

• In general the ways the actors moved around the stage was phenomenal. This is not something I generally notice but since there's not a ton of dance-y dancing in the show, it really stands out how perfectly everyone is traversing the giant stage

• Also the way they move in and out the scenery is an extension of that where it's all just fluid and natural

• And this is the finest showcase

• And knockout performances by Phillipa Soo and Jordan Donica in I Loved You Once In Silence, the pain and guilt is just so apparent

• Lance grabbing the sword

• And slapping Mordred

• And then her ladies in waiting(?) pulling Mordred off Genny

Act 2, Scene 4: The trial/The Battle

• The staging of Guenevere also has burrowed itself into my brain

• It's so much more still than Fie on Goodness and the dread of that is so effective

• I don't even have the words for Andrew Burnap's performance, on some level he's not doing much as far as movement or expression as they wait for the verdict but also he's doing everything

• I would personally like a full commentary from the director and actor and writer so they can explain to me exactly what's going on in Arthur's head during this scene because damn so much is happening

• And everything you hear on the cast recording that he says is acted so well and intensely when you actually see it

• The way he grabs the paper after Pelli gives him the guilty news is a heartbreaker

• Mordred's glee just absolutely shining through and then the way he storms out once he's been banished

• Mordred walking up to the sword when Arthur draws it and taunting him about not being barbaric and when he puts it down, you think it worked and then

• Arthur fucking choking Mordred holy shit

• The dressing of Arthur in the armor which again is so quiet and simple but conveys the shift so well

• He's not a king making laws to improve the world anymore, he's a commander getting ready for war and his entire demeanor shows that

• We've heard of Arthur who's faced armies and glimpsed it slightly in the tournament but you finally get that his mind too comes with steel

• When the knights circle him and they all kneel and cross themselves

• Again just so somber like we all knew this story was not going to end well for these characters but you forget and here it finally clicks back in

Act 2, Scene 5: Outside Joyous Gard - on the eve of war

• Again an everyone's faces problem every moment of the scene

• Lance and Genny kneeling when they show up, like they've caused a whole damn war but they still gotta kneel before the king

• And obviously it's them but when they flip off the hoods, it's still a moment

• Arthur not looking at Genny when he says he'd burn her himself if it would stop the war

• Arthur and Lance saying their goodbye and then him walking off

• Genny falling to her knees when she begs to come back and die is unfair

• And then Arthur offering his hands and helping her up

• Arthur and Genny are in clear pain every single second and same

• Arthur looking at audience instead of Genny while he confesses his love

• And then they're standing facing the audience instead of each other while they have the whole discussion, until Genny finally reciprocates

• The pain on his face when he says that he's the king and she would have had to pretend

• Genny trying to leave and then when they look back at each other and run to each other

• The hug, it's such a good hug, they hold on so tight and it breaks me

• And then the kiss, romantic as hell

• Looking away from each other when she finally has to leave

• Arthur trying to get himself back under control

• And then the way his face shifts when he realized Tom has heard the stories of Camelot

• You can see on his face when he decides to tell Tom all the stories were true

• Arthur is very cute with Tom, leading him around under his arm when he says he's not ready in particular

• Then everyone remaining walking off stage is incredibly epic and triumphant and hopeful

#I am aware this is an unhinged thing I have done #this is not dialogue or delivery it is just things that you see #and yet it's still distressingly long #Charlotte for ts #people probably don't even use ts anymore but that's the tag I used ten years ago when I started this blog #so too late to change it now #This Barbie can't shut up about Camelot #Camelot Musical #maybe time to be unhinged about the music and book next #we'll see how little self-control I have #this is just so much what is wrong with me #and then I have more thoughts somehow???#gotta expel all the thoughts before I have to go into the office this week because I have to appear normal and competent

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