#THINGS ARE GOOD I MOVED TO NORWAY LOL

[islandiis]

[He grins!!! as he's pulled in. Cautiously as ever, he wraps his arms around Aleks.]

Yeah... "duty calls", isn't that what they say? I think that's the saying. Things have been... [There's a pause, but then he decides to just shrug.] Okay.

How are things with you? Are you keeping well? You're eating enough, right?

@islandiis replied to (x)

[He shuffles his feet, awkwardly.] I have socks for you, too. It's been a while!

You know me, can always use a good sock.

[ pulls him in, ruffles his hair ]

Been a minute, that's for sure. Where the Crown wants you to go, well... You go. How's things?

[bp-zb1fics]

My heart keeps on

pairing: na kamden x secret s/o reader

pronouns: none used

genre: canonverse  (finale), angst ish, fluff

tw/tags: long distance relationship, very emo in general, a lot of tears LIKE A LOT, you surprise kamden twice, citing ep 12 as my ref for all this, kinda secret relationship, realities of dating a trainee/idol, reunions so more emo, cuddles, cheek kissing, using a pic as a page break, yes the title is fr kam’s rap in switch ty for noticing 💜

wc: 2178

summary: kamden hasn’t seen you in over a year. you surprise him.

a/n this was supposed to be a gift fic for 101 followers but y'all are 200 now 😭😱 omg so thanks so much for supporting my little blog!!! I know this took a little longer than expected so thanks so much for patiently waiting! 💜Special thanks to the anon who sent me an ask about missing kamden and especially to @seok02 for giving me the motivation to finish this fic and kinda just helping me with the overall process 💜💜💜

check my pinned for more fics!

“Star Creator, we always thank you and love you!”

They wrap up the pajama party livestream, thanking the staff and staying to chat as the cameras are switched off. (Or so they think, lol)

“The vibe was pretty good,” Kamden tells Matthew. The other boy agreeing instantly.

“I think we were able to show new sides of ourselves.”

Suddenly the staff play a recording, surprising them all. It’s video messages from Star creators all over the world for them to watch. Kamden grabs a fluffy pillow as he watches everyone slowly get emotional. Seungeon cries. Zhang Hao cries. Yujin cries. Almost everyone is crying. 

Kamden gets a message from a fan in Norway, which is pretty cool. Then, something he never expected happens. He recognises your voice before he even realises it’s you.

“Kamden, annyeong~”

The pillow falls off his lap.

It’s you. It’s really you. You who he hasn’t been able to video call in a few days because of practice and your schedule and the time difference. He almost calls out your name but it sits tight in his throat, unable to reach you. 

You’re on screen, wearing one of the shirts you’ve stolen from him, holding onto the plushie he bought for you at that silly little shop after you insisted it looked like him. God, he hasn’t seen you in over a year.

“Dude, you okay?” Jay asks him softly.

He must look like an idiot, eyes blown wide, mouth slightly open, hanging onto every word that comes out of your mouth.

“I’ve been watching Boy’s Planet since the teasers were released. And you’ve always been my favourite.”

Kamden knows. You’ve been spamming your chat with him with all these little clips from the PR videos to the behind the scenes footage. Screenshots of you voting for him on the Mnet+ app, comments you’ve left on his fancam videos, even the funny memes you found of him on Twitter all greet him when he opens his phone after practice.

Hope my favourite trainee is doing well and staying healthy! Take care of yourself and know I’m always rooting for you! I love and miss you so much! Hoping for your debut!

Your messages are his favourite. And speaking of:

“I’ve made a little compilation of photos right here. I hope you like how I decorated them, I really tried my best~”

All the trainees ooh and ahh over the handmade album you bring up to the screen compiled with photos of him from the program and cute little notes and stickers. Kamden can’t move, can’t talk. 

Because that’s your album, the one you had insisted on starting when he and you began dating. He knows that if you flipped to the other pages, it would be full of photos of both of you, dates, anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, awards that either of you might have won, events that were important to you or him or both of you, everything carefully labelled. It was one of your favourite things to print out all the photos and he’d help you decorate them.

He can’t believe you kept that up after he left for Korea.

“You’ve stood out to me in every performance. You’re so talented and so many people are cheering you on so please remember to have confidence in yourself.” Your voice wavers a little towards the end of the sentence and as slight as it is, he catches that. He knows you.

Kamden only registers the wetness on his cheeks when the tears are already going, fast and furious. He reaches up, trying to dab them away gently with his sleeve. On screen, you blink rapidly and he knows you’re trying your best not to cry either. Even thousands of miles away, on a video you probably recorded weeks ago, you and him are still in sync. Maybe the rest of the trainees don’t see it but he does. Of course he does.

“I hope you take care of yourself always. Make sure to eat enough and get enough rest. I’ll be voting for you everyday so just do your best in practice and performing and us Star Creators will take care of the rest. We’ll support you so you can achieve your dream of debuting~”

To everyone else, you were just a particularly supportive fan. But to Kamden, you were his person, the one he was devoted to and he can’t help it, sobbing a little into his sleeve. Several pats on the back as the other trainees around him try to comfort him. He can’t help but cry even more. Why were you so far away? Why couldn’t you be here where he could hug you and kiss you and just be with you?

“Na Kamden hwaiting! Saranghae~”

That’s it. He turns and buries his face fully into his hands as if doing that would soak up all the tears that won’t stop coming. Matthew and Jay have scooted over, voices overlapping as they rub his shoulders and back and ask what’s wrong. Even Zhang Hao’s hovering a little on the side, equally concerned.

Maybe he’ll say something later, when there are no mics and no cameras. He’s been training for years and you’ve both agreed that in a career like the one he aspires to get into, keeping it quiet would be the best. Idols don’t date. Idols don’t have a significant other in a whole other country that they call when they can find free time. Even when it comes to casual conversation where there isn’t a camera directly trained on them, Kamden just doesn’t say anything.

They do ask him later. And when he says you’re a close friend he hasn’t seen in awhile, their faces light up in recognition. He leaves it at that.

You walk into the arena with a little trepidation. 

It’s all been a blur. Packing your things, flying to Korea, meeting up with Kamden’s mom and brother who have been kind enough to get you a ticket pass for the family section. Of course, he has no idea you’re even here.

You’re quite a bit more nervous about surprising him than you thought. While you’d give anything to see him again, it was a little risky in such a public venue with so many people watching and cameras everywhere filming almost any angle. Maybe you can be discreet enough if you do break down but Kamden’s on stage, the spotlights bright and on him. Fans are probably filming him on their own devices.

At this point, you’ll just have to trust your boyfriend to keep his reactions to a believable level. You don’t stand too close to his family, trying to keep your distance but also staying near enough that you’d be in the same general direction if Kamden glanced your way.

You end up on the side, along with a few other people who seem to be dressed as discreetly as you, masks on too. The looks you exchange seem to come to a general understanding of why you’re all here and who you’re here for.

Kamden doesn’t notice you when the Top 18 first file in. You don’t expect him to but you see him though. There’s a growing knot in your stomach, emotions welling up from actually seeing him not through a screen but so close that you could walk on stage and touch him. You don’t do that, of course. But still, he’s so near that it almost hurts not being able to throw yourself into his arms for a hug.

You’ve wanted this so much, especially after more than a year of not seeing him. But right now, you feel frozen. You only watch as they start getting into positions for the signal song. Fans are cheering, even the family members and friends of the trainees are calling out words of support. Still, your voice sticks to your throat, as much as you want to shout out, something keeps you from doing it.

Good thing Kamden’s brother does it for you. It probably surprises you and his mom more than it should but who can blame you when he almost never does that? Kamden’s surprised too, maybe it’s a twin thing but he immediately stands up straighter looking for where his brother’s voice is coming from.

And then he sees you.

His eyes meet yours and they widen considerably. His mouth even drops open a little. You’re smiling so much and you’re sure it shows from how your eyes crinkle, just a little glossy. But you’re not going to cry just yet. Instead, you wave at him. He can’t do much more than give a little wave back before they seem to be ready to start filming. 

Suddenly, your heart feels just a little lighter. You step back and watch him dance the signal song. You’ve seen him do it a thousand times, every time you stream his video. It feels so surreal, being able to see it like this, right in front of you. When the song ends, you see his eyes flick back in your direction, searching for your face. When he finds it, his expression brightens.

It’s amazing, watching someone you love do what they love. Sure, you’ve seen Kamden dance, you’ve gotten him to sing and even rap for you a little before. But it’s different with the stage and the lights and the crowd and he looks so comfortable there. You laugh when you see the Jelly Pop teaser, maybe you’ll get him to wear that dress again, just so you can get photos. The final song is almost bittersweet and you try your best but a few tears do slip out.

He’s messaged you about barely making it to the finale, you’ve monitored the program, watched his rank. You both know his chances are slim. But they’re possible. Still, he’s told you that he’s prepared for the equal possibility of not debuting. His company should have plans, he assured you. You watch him walk over to every one of his fellow trainees who’ve made it to debut, offering hugs and congratulating them. And as the number of spots dwindle, you keep your hopes up but you begin to accept it as well.

By the time they’ve called third, you watch as he walks over to Matthew, one of the trainees he’s closest with from what he’s told you. Maybe he lingers a little longer. Maybe you catch his eyes as he looks over. Hwaiting! You mouth, shaking your fists a little in encouragement. The emotions are swirling inside you. When the camera pans over to him, he’s teary eyed, covering his face the way he always does when he gets like that. You can’t help it. The emotions are starting to spill over and you breathe between the occasional tears.

After they announce the ninth place, everything suddenly starts moving so fast and so slow. They wrap up filming. The audience begins to file out. The cameras switch off one by one. You go backstage.

When he walks in, mic gone, still in that uniform that you keep teasing about, you don’t hold back. His arms wrap around you and you fall into him, holding him so tightly you wish you didn’t need to let go. And then both of you start crying.

“I missed you so much, Kam.” You’re holding onto the fabric of his jacket, gripping at it so desperately you’re almost afraid it might rip.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” He manages, his head somehow buried on your shoulder, tears soaking the cloth of your shirt.

“Surprise?” It comes out weak, a little shaky as you both laugh brokenly through your sobs.

“I can’t believe you’re here.” He holds you even tighter, like he’s afraid you might fade into thin air.

“I’ll be here for a while.” You tell him. “I wish I could’ve come sooner but-”

“It’s okay seriously, you’re here now.” If he squeezes you anymore, you feel like your heart might burst. “I’m so happy to see you.”

He goes back with you. There’s few brief introductions to Jay and Matthew and a few other trainees he’s grown close with, nudges and knowing looks and raised eyebrows. But it’s nothing to stress about, you manage to make it back under the radar.

You feel him watching you as you grab a few more things from your suitcase after both of you have showered and you’re wearing another one of his old shirts. Before you know it, your legs are tangled together, your head resting on his shoulder, your hands intertwined. 

“I don’t want to sleep,” he says quietly. “I don’t want to wake up and find out this is a dream and you aren’t here.”

“You aren’t dreaming, Kam.” You reassure him, lifting your head to kiss his cheek. Even in the privacy of this room, he blushes.

“Even if I didn’t make it, at least I have you.”

“You do, Kam. You always do.” And you know he will make it, one day.

[pseudophan]

you didn’t go to tatinof?

nooo and it's my greatest regret in life :( i lived in norway when the tour started and like i COULD probably have gone if i wanted to like i think my mum would've turned the world upside down to make it possible but i was so depressed back then i didn't even consider it a possibility i was just like oh guess i'm not seeing them. cause they hadn't announced any (non uk) europe dates. and then by the time they did go to europe i had moved to england 😭 and again i probably Could have gone but i was too caught up in the insanity that was my mum being willing to move to fucking england to even consider asking her like heyyy can we um... travel to see dan and phil on tour lol.......

i did follow most of the tour closely online though. i believe i started this blog right after the uk leg had ended? if i hadn't i probably would have avoided any news about what was happening at the shows cause i was so sad about not going, but because this silly little blog for whatever reason got kinda popular really quickly i got really obsessed with keeping up with it. which was both a good and a bad thing, good cause it made me enjoy the whole tatinof era a lot more but bad cause it made me even more jealous i wasn't going lol

that being said i did see them perform the internet is here live at the boncas! so i feel like i caught the most important part, y'know?

[bootsandsugarr]

Song of the day༄

Today has been so windy! very annoying for my fringe havers out there, I know y'all get me. It has also been such a good music day! It's been an exploring genres day so it was a struggle to decide which one I wanted to pull from. However, luckily enough this song covers a few of the bases. It also happens to be super nostalgic and beautiful.

I've been really interested in nautical stuff recently, anything nautical i'm heart eyes with right now. It's not really a new thing of interest for me, just revisiting. The imagery in this song is very heavily nautical.(it also talks about wind, so perf.)

And when that foghorn blows I will be coming home, mm-mm And when the foghorn blows I want to hear it, I don't have to fear it

Van Morrison is a big one for my family. My dad is very firm in his belief that Morrison is the best musical artist to come out of Ireland. I think I agree... but that is not to understate the other greats.

I was listening to a lot of my folk music today, I missed you Jim Croce. Picking a favorite genre is near impossible... BUT if I had to pick I think it would be folk. I love you folk I love you folk acoustic I looove you I love you sea shanties I love you literally every subgenre of folk.

Back to the nautical... I've been thinking about how I want another tattoo and I was thinking it would be nice to get one of the lighthouse I stayed in, in Norway! This is the lighthouse in question btw:

It was so fun I really miss those trips. This time was when we were stranded because of a storm. None of the locals wanted to come pick us up because of the conditions out there. Speaking of the wind today, I seriously have never felt wind like I did on that island. It was so impossible to walk, the strength of it was so incredible. We had to walk so far down to use the bathroom, like an actual hike. So every time you needed to go you had to face the storm in full gear. There were so many sheep, one big mother sheep chased me. We had to start rationing food and chocolates lol. Which objectively sounds scary and a lot of people had breakdowns but I thought it was so much fun. It was one of my favorite things the whole year Stuff like this makes me feel like I need to move back. It was such a special experience, I've been reflecting upon it a lot recently. That trip really stuck with me, it was so beautiful. I miss my friends from that class too. I was in nature all the time, all the time whether i wanted to or not. I miss it so much dang it I think this is my sign to go back. Back then i almost strictly listened to folk acoustic so I also associate this music with those long haul trips.

Something about living on an island+lighthouse really intrigues me. I need to go to a lighthouse ASAP, maybe I'll try and go to one this weekend.

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Hi there! As someone who really enjoys your Lords Of Chaos content, do you think you could write a male reader who’s Oystein’s identical, more introverted and less metal crazed artsy twin brother catching feelings for Pelle, the pretty boy from Sweden who likes dead things lol? I’ve seen the twin fic ideas done with Rory’s other characters, so I’m putting a lil spin on it. The two managed to bound over drawing and enjoying each others works. And one day, reader works up the courage to drive out to Mayhem’s practice place/house for Pelle’s birthday with a dead rabbit he found the road as a gift and just blurts out his feelings for him quickly. Then tries to leave out of embarrassment, but Pelle stops him and tells him he likes him too? They share a kiss, only to realize the rest of the band was watching the whole time. Who are very happy they don’t have to witness the two of them pinning for each other anymore, and Oystein jokingly threatens Pelle to not hurt his brother or else, cause we love good protective siblings in this house. Reading your fics have helped brighten my day when I’m feeling down, and I hope you have a good 2024 :)

- Two artists -

warning ; fluff, comfort, kiss

Info : Thank you dear anon for the request I know I had it for a few months but now I had finally time writing it. Have fun reading and have a good day too ;)

masterlist

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They were more different than sun and moon than day and night than anything they both were. The family got used to joking around in the early years, even allowing the kids to pretend to be each other and enjoying their little jokes when it worked.

But the older they got the more obvious it became how they developed Euronymous as he would call her summoned himself to the devil, to metal music, dyed his hair black and drifted off into something none of his family really understood.

What everyone initially thought was a phase quickly turned out to be something he was absorbed in, something he would do his whole life. 

In contrast, his twin brother's natural brown hair was not loud, but quiet, almost leisured, not extroverted, but introverted and not into loud music. His creativity is in painting and not in music.

But the two quickly realized that they would both make something in their field that would change the world, or at least Norway, in one way or another, 

When Euronymous moved out of the house and left the room to his brother, he knew that he needed it more for painting. He devoted himself to his art studio and only saw his older twin from time to time. He won a painting competition in the city after a night out and Euronymous got one gig after the next, slowly but surely, with his band.

They both continued to develop and yet they always stayed in touch. If it wasn't phone calls, it was the brown-haired one's semester break meeting, who, when he wasn't visiting their shared family, visited his twin in the light wasteland.

The red quarry they had acquired was a little artistically stimulating, at least in one way or another. A view shared by someone from Mayhen's band. The blond singer Dead, who had joined the band just before the vacations and seemed to be the dark angel of music.

At least for Euronymous it was something that could take him to the top of the world. But for his brother, the blond was more not only on an artistic level as his muse but also as someone who painted himself, someone who shared such a passion.

That when they all met, they got into one or two discussions about drawing, painting and the most diverse motifs. Motifs that were close to the heart, like the blonde in the brown-haired man's heart. Something he didn't want to admit at first, something he didn't want to admit to himself. But in the end he had to realize that he had lost his heart to the singer and artist.

A fact he tried to keep secret but beyond his knowledge the black circle already had a hunch. Every time they met, they saw the blond drawing a portrait of something that was not his friend and band founder as they initially thought.

While Euronymous caught his brother reading occult books about death, which was not only extremely unusual but also true books that belonged to Dead. 

But all this culminated in one thing the brown-haired man knew he had to do. The birthday of the blond singer and the one he had lost his heart to. 

The silver car drove along the country road towards the house, fingers tapping nervously on the steering wheel, ,,A present," he muttered over and over, thinking of something to give the blond. Around one of the few bends and then his eyes caught sight of the snow-white rabbit lying on the road in front of him.

Hastily getting out of the car and picking up a blanket, he took the cold, stiff animal and put it in his trunk, a satisfied grin playing around his lips, ,,That's perfect," he muttered before pushing the accelerator and driving towards the house at a rapid pace.

It was only moments later when he found himself in the party that the music rang in his ears and he would have preferred to run out again rather than stay here. The quieter, more classical music was much more appealing to him, but the blonde liked the voice in the song and that was why he was here for Dead.

Moving forward, he pushed his way through the crowds of people who welcomed him and his grinning twin who pushed him towards the rehearsal room with a slap on the shoulder before the door closed behind him. ,,Dead? All the best-I've got something for you," he mumbled and saw the blond look up from the gift table, body color adorning his pale face and a slight smile playing around his lips.

,,You're here... thank you," he murmured and approached the brown-haired man who held out the gift to him, his gaze searching for his love. Before he took a shaky breath there was no other way, he had to do it now or he would never dare and would end up embarrassing Dead.

,,De-Dead I have to tell you something the gift, the painting the conversations I like it and I like...you what I want to say...I love you" he stammered his feelings for the blond his heart was beating up to his neck and he was afraid he would choke on it, his cheeks were heating up and he wanted to run out.

Dead, who looked from the rabbits to the other, seemed overwhelmed by both gifts. He was about to run to the door out of fear when he was suddenly held fast, the white rabbit still clutching Dead's hand.

The bright eyes full of devotion suddenly came true, ,,I-I like you too!" he shouted over the music as a smile appeared on the other's lips. He loved him too, loved him back and returned his feelings.

Dead gave the rabbit a grin that seemed genuinely pleased with the gift before pulling the brown-haired man into a careful kiss. He tasted the alcohol, the beer the blond had drunk, the sweetness of the snack it was sweet and intimate.

Suddenly a giggle was heard before the door opened and the band stumbled in at their feet. ,,At last!" Euronymous shouted to his twin and his singer and the others in the band congratulated them and only now did it come out that apparently they had all just been waiting for the moment. The moment when they had to strike.

As they extended a congratulatory beer to the brown-haired one, the black-haired one took the blond one aside. ,,You know that I value my little brother and you too, but I hope you know that I wouldn't hesitate to shoot you sooner than necessary," he warned with a smile before he put the blond in a headlock and rubbed him over the head until he protested and broke away.

,,Come on, let my muse live!" The brown-haired man shouted and patted his brother gently on the shoulder before he pulled Dead close again and gave him another soft kiss while the band had an even bigger party. A party in which satanic powers met two artists united in love - there had never been anything more unequal and epic.

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@icarus-star

[cuttingpenisblackmetal]

murdermag! set during doomstar requiem, during the 'partying around the world' phase. tw: torture, everything that happens in doomstar requiem.

read on ao3

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 11:46:

>hey i know this forum is capital d DEAD but uh… anyone seen the news about toki wartooth?

METALDEATH492 posted 11:53

>lul what news? i thought he was MIA

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 11:54

>that's what i mean dickface. where the fuck is he?

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 11:55

>isn't he at some metal retreat in finland? learning the art of troll summoning

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 11:55

>i heard he moved back 2 norway 2 become a priest

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 11:57

>knew it, nobody knows anything except for stupid rumors… u r all so gullible idiots

METALDEATH492 posted 11:58

>NOBODY knows where he is, that's why he's MISSING idiot

C4NN1B4LC0RPS3 posted 00:01

>my band teacher said he's finally recording his solo album. all toki. it's gonna be called "toki is the king" it's going to blow dethklok out of the water :P

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:03

>LOL ur band teacher is full of shit

C4NN1B4LC0RPS3 posted 00:05

>xD you are so stupid. my band teachers cousin met toki at a wedding once and he told her all about the album. ill show my signed copy to u dildos when he releases it next month o_-

TAMPERINGWITHUREVIDENCE posted 00:09

>i heard hes in hospital cuz a clown tried to murder him

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:14

>You're all wrong. Toki's been kidnapped by the terrorist organization known as the Revengencers.

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:17

>2edgy4me

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:20

>He was kidnapped at Roy Cornickleson's funeral, along with Dethklok's new producer, Abigail. He's being held prisoner, waiting to be rescued by Dethklok.

TAMPERINGWITHUREVIDENCE posted 00:21

>pics or it didnt happen

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:23

>sickpuppy.jpg

>sickpuppy2.jpg

>sickpuppy3.jpg

/

The artificial light of the phone's screen burns into Murderface's eyes. He's aching for need of sleep, aching because he's been staring at this screen for hours, aching because he's two weeks into a bender and plastered to a sofa in a shitty hotel. His fingers move of their own accord. He clicks the link.

/

[The first image is almost too dark to discern a figure in-- there's some sort of basement, lit only by a thin sliver of light illuminating something on the floor. A chain. The chain leads to a dark and indeterminate shape on the floor.]

[The second image shows the distinctive shape of an emaciated human body. Tattered funeral clothes. Long brown hair bunched up around a face, arms wrapped protectively around a head. Badly-mended hole in a stomach sunken with hunger.]

[The third image shows half of his face. Only half of it. It's unmistakably him. His eyes are closed. He finally looks like he's at peace.]

/

TAMPERINGWITHUREVIDENCE posted 00:27

>holy shit dude

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:29

>fake

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 00:29

>is he dead?

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:30

>He is alive and well. I have been taking good care of him. I feed him once a day and give him treats when he's been a good boy.

TAMPERINGWITHUREVIDENCE posted 00:32

>this is so fucked up

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:33

>guys this is so fakety fake fake xD

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 00:34

>o_O

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:34

>I can promise that it's not fake.

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:35

>i can literally see the pixels from your crappy photoshop job dickface…

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:36

>sickpuppy.wav

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:39

>Oh, I think he's awake. Does anyone have any questions for the elusive Toki Wartooth? He's usually quite media-shy. I wouldn't waste this opportunity.

/

He knows he shouldn't click on it. His finger freezes above the screen. In the other room he can hear the soft moans of some woman Skwisgaar's taken to bed, Nathan's thunderous snores. Pickles has been in the kitchen smashing mugs for twenty minutes. He wants them to see him. He wants them to berate him for looking at a fan forum, for thinking about the thing they've all agreed not to think about. He wants them to stop his fat ugly finger from pressing on that link.

/

[The camera is shaking. He's awake, there's a glint of white eyes behind one of those long arms. The sound in the video is scratchy, but a soft whimper can be heard above the static. A gnarled hand reaches out, takes one of his shoulders, rolls him from his side onto his back. The hole in his stomach gleams wet and red. His eyes go wide, but he does not resist, does not try to defend himself. He brings his arms around his head. Between those biceps-- the glint of a chain around his neck.]

/

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 00:43

>well that escalated

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 00:44

>WTF

BATFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:45

>pff guys its from some russian horror movie, that doesnt even look like toki, look at the cheekbones

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:45

>Ask me to do something to him. You know you want to.

METALDEATH492 posted 00:46

>GUYS. stop feeding this troll. its just some fucked up freak getting off on a weird fantasy

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:49

>stick your finger in his mouth

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 00:50

>eww lol thats gay

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 00:51

>wtf happened to my thread lol

METALDEATH492 posted 00:52

>too many horny gay freaks follow this band, its ruining the scene, dethklok made metal gay

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:53

>your mom made metal gay to me last night

METALDEATH492 posted 00:54

>that doesn't even make sense

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 00:54

>get a room guys

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 00:55

>i hope tokis okay O_o wtf happened to his chest?

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 00:56

>he got stabbed by all that gullible they found in ur moms house

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 00:59

>sickpuppy2.wav

/

Murderface knows what he's going to see before he sees it.

/

[A long finger, sharp-jointed, a lattice of fine scars criss-crossing the top. Familiar. A pair of thin lips yielding obediently when it parts them. The camera is very close to his face-- his grimy, gaunt face-- in one of his crystal-blue eyes the iris has been ripped open. Sharp teeth close gently around the intruding finger, but then that head turns away, trying to resist the invasion. The video cuts.]

/

MURMURMURMAIDER posted 01:01

>uhh guys maybe someone should call the police? this looks legit…

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 01:01

>what. the. fuck.

BATSFJORDSLUT8 posted 01:02

>hot

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 01:04

>No police.

>If anyone other than Dethklok comes here, I will kill them both.

>Check this out.

>sickpuppy5.jpg

/

Murderface recognises the knife pressed to Toki's throat. He is about to do something very stupid.

/

[His eyes are closed again, his bottom lip pinched between his teeth. The knife digs into the skin just above the metal collar.]

/

PLANETPI55 posted 01:06

>Magnus u fuck that's my fucking knife

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 01:12

>Hello, William.

LIGHTNINGHORSE posted 01:13

>this is getting 2 weird 4 me

METALDEATH492 posted 01:14

>wait… @Hammertime1234 ur magnus hammersmith? are u fucking kidding me

PLANETPI55 posted 01:15

>FUCK UUUUUUUUUUUUUU

/

>You have one (1) private message request.

/

"Murderface," Pickles slurs from the kitchen. "Come help me smash these fuckin' mugs…"

/

HAMMERTIME1234 sent 01:18

>Toki says hi, by the way.

>Do you have anything you want to say to him? He misses you very much.

PLANETPI55 sent 01:20

>u r one SICK individual. are u fucking GETTING OFF on this?? u twisted fucking homo

HAMMERTIME1234 sent 01:25

>hellowilliam.wav

/

"Murderface…" Pickles stumbles into the living room. He's so drunk he has to cling to the wall to stand. "Get off your phooooooone for once… you're always on that fuckin' internet an' shit…"

Murderface doesn't hear him.

Magnus' face is only half in the screen. He looks bad, really bad-- Murderface knows a manic episode when he sees one-- his eyes are wide and blown, he's shaking, the camera's focus is all over the place. He's doing his best to aim the camera at himself with one hand, while with the other he's trying to scrape Toki off of the floor. Toki, tough-as-nails Toki, is resisting-- curling up on himself, rolling to his side, swatting weakly at Magnus' arms. There's a voice in the background, a woman's voice, 'Magnus, leave him alone, come on…'

"Don't be like that, Toki," Magnus' voice is that soft, manipulative purr he once reserved for Murderface. "Your friend's on the phone. Don't you want to say hi?"

Toki's eyes widen. He turns his head, his body slackens-- Magnus takes the opportunity to slide a hand beneath him. The image blurs with movement, and when it steadies, Toki is in Magnus' lap, his head lulling against Magnus' shoulder, one eye closed, the other half-open. Magnus' face is buried in filthy hair, but his eyes loom perilously white over Toki's head.

Murderface sits up.

"Go on," Magnus murmurs. "Say hi to Murderface."

Toki blinks. He looks confused. His brow draws together. How has he lost so much weight? How long has he been captive?

A woman's voice, off to the side: 'Magnus. You're being a dick!'

"Hi, Moidaface…" Toki says in a thin voice.

The video cuts.

/

PLANETPI55 posted 01:42

>nathan should have KILLLD u

>sick fuck

>sick twisted FUCK

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 01:44

>Jealous?

>I'm taking requests all evening.

>I'm running out of ideas. Give me something new to do to him.

PLANETPI55 posted 01:46

>i want NO part in ur twisted homoerotic games

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 01:48

>You're the one making this gay.

>As usual.

>I bet you'd love to see me stab him again.

>If you know what I mean.

PLANETPI55 posted 01:49

>fuck magnus dont

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 01:50

>Then come GET HIM

>This is YOUR fault

>If YOU came to SAVE him none of this would be HAPPENING to him

>YOU are the one doing this William

>I've been thinking about why you haven't come to save him. You know what I think? I think you want this to happen to him. You want to do to him what you did to me. Stabbed in the back and left out in the cold.

>That's why you're looking at this forum. Isn't it? You're getting off to those videos.

>Admit it, Murderface

>Admit it to me

>I'll give you a nice reward if you admit it

PLANETPI55 posted 02:03

>you're one sick bastard u know that?

>kill yourself and i mean it

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 02:12

>giftforwilliam.wav

/

Murderface's hands move towards the link without his mind's consent.

Someone else's hand closes over the phone.

Murderface turns around and sees Pickles. Pickles does not look drunk any more; his eyes are wide, his face is ashen, so pale that it's grey. "Dude," Pickles says hollowly, "Don't."

Murderface wrenches his phone away. His finger goes for the link.

"Don't!" Pickles barks, smacking his hand so hard that the phone goes flying. "Don't you dare open dat!"

"Fuck off!" Murderface yells back, slapping Pickles' arm away from him. He jumps off the couch and grabs the phone. The screen glows like fire against the darkness that surrounds them.

/

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 02:14

>Just remember that you're doing this

>For every day you don't rescue for him

>For every hour you let him rot here

>That's your hand in the video

>I told him you asked for that one

/

Charles is never in his office these days. He's in Mordhaus' control centre, sitting in his dumb glowing chair, and he looks awful. Even through the video link he looks awful. He looks more tired than Murderface has ever seen him, and the red lighting does him no favours. Then again, he seems immaculate next to Pickles, who is sitting next to Murderface and shaking like a less seasoned alcoholic, hugging his bottle of bourbon to his chest as if it's a teddy bear. Compared to those two Murderface can't fathom how bad he must look. He is, after all, the ugly one.

Charles' expression is unreadable as he browses the files Murderface has sent to him. Not a single muscle twitches. Pickles and Murderface sit too close to each other and, as they've always done with all their problems, they wait for him to solve it.

Finally Charles puts the phone down. "Excuse me for a moment," he says. Then he steps out of view of the webcam, and Murderface hears over the speakers the faint sound of someone retching.

When Charles returns he is noticeably paler. "Well," he says, in a strained voice, "The time stamps confirm that Toki is still alive. That's good information to have."

"Dude," Pickles says anxiously, "Can't you like, I dunno, hack the mainframe on these? Use some computer guru wizard shit and find out where he is?"

"Yeah, get that fat virgin on it," says Murderface. "Hack the fuckin' mainframe and find this sick fuck."

Charles pinches his nose. "I have explained the issue to you before," he says patiently.

"So? Hire one of them hacker dudes, I dunno, shit! Shit! He's right there, do something!"

"As Magnus so helpfully reminded you," Charles said, "If anyone other than Dethklok comes for them, he will kill both Toki and Abigail. After seeing these, I would suggest we don't call his bluff."

Murderface knows an expression of disgust when he sees one. Charles is looking right at them and his eyes are pure revulsion. Fuck, our manager finally hates us. They deserve it. The shame is unbearable.

"But-- but--" Pickles' voice has climbed an octave. "He's right there!" he wails, ramming his fist down on the keyboard of Murderface's laptop. "He's right there! We can see him! Why can't you go get him!"

"I'm afraid I can't answer that, Pickles," said Charles in a thin voice. He left unstated the obvious: only you can.

With a wordless cry of despair, Pickles hurls his bottle of bourbon towards the wall. It crashes into one of the doors, and the feminine moans, which have thus far provided an unsettling backdrop to their argument, cease.

"Oh, God," Murderface groans, moments before--

The door slams open. "Will you SHUTS DE FUCKS UP OUT HERE?" Skwisgaar shouts. He hovers in the doorway like a blond, naked wraith, his hair everywhere, his eyes blown wide.

"Will you MIND YOUR FUCKIN' MANNERS?" retorts Pickles. "People are SLEEPING out here, Skwisgaar!"

"Oh fucks you to hell," Skwisgaar snarls.

"And you better not be on dat crystal meth again--"

But the door slams shut. Pickles lets loose a shout that sounds far, far too close to a sob, and without explanation, storms off.

Murderface is left before the judgemental stare of their weary and hateful manager. His phone remains clutched in his hand.

"… Well," says Charles, without patience. "Is this everything you wanted to show me?"

Murderface looks down at his lap, at the phone. He's closed the forum at Pickles' demand but it would only take a few clicks to have it back open. His fingers twitch.

"I'll leave you to it--" Charles begins, moving to cut off the video link.

"Wait," says Murderface. "I, uh."

"… What is it?"

"So you were like… pals, with Magnusch, right? You guys, uh, you palled around."

Charles narrows his eyes.

"I was jusch wondering if he ever… told you a certain schomething about… you know. Him and me."

"We, ah, knew each other before I took on my managerial role," says Charles cautiously. "But he never disclosed anything… personal."

Murderface leans into the laptop; he pushes his fingers hard against the spikes of his phone, until he feels blood welling out of the pads. "Well," he mutters, "Magnusch and I had a… we uh, we kind of had a thing. Y'know."

"Er."

"I'm not schaying it was kind of a gay thing, but… wait, we have manager-client confidenschiality, right? You aren't gonna tell the guys about thisch?"

"I won't tell anyone, but--"

"Cause they might take it the wrong way, y'know, they might be jealousch or somethin'…"

"William, I have work to do, so unless this is--"

"I'm just schayin', I was schpecial to Magnus," says Murderface quietly. There's blood trickling down his knee and he feels like he's at confession, he doesn't want to say this but it's welling out of him anyways. "We just always had schomething. Like Nathan and Pickles, or y'know, Skwisgaar and-- and-- what's-his-face. It's just a little schomethin'… special. Between us. You know?"

"Do you have a point?"

"It should be me down there," Murderface admits.

Charles closes his eyes. "I would advise you not to be too… jealous, of Toki's predicament," he says, voice strained.

"I'm not jealousch," Murderface lies. "I just--"

"Uh-huh."

"I can't schee him again. I can't schee Magnus again."

Charles' face is an unyielding stone. "You've all made that very clear," he says, with no grace, no understanding, not a shred of sympathy. "Good day."

The screen is cut before Murderface can beg him to stay. The dark screen reflects his ugly mug-- his hair dry and filthy, his face bloated from excessive drinking, his eyes puffy. Flabby and cowardly and despicable. Why was he even surprised that Magnus hadn't wanted him?

The phone was still in his hand. He knows he shouldn't do the thing he does next. He opens his browser.

/

HAMMERTIME1234 posted 04:23

>Well. I assume you won't reply to me.

>That's too bad.

>I miss you.

>Goodnight, William.

>goodnightwilliam.wav

/

For once Murderface shows an ounce of common sense. He does not open that file.

He finds a bottle of whiskey in the kitchen, lies down beneath the table, and drinks himself into a dreamless sleep.

[dearmrsawyer]

am decidedly not leaving bed today!! i feel like i've been run off my feet the last few weeks and i don't need to go anywhere or do anything today so i will not :) yesterday i hosted a fundraiser for the Cancer Council, an Australian org that does tonnes of things like fund research, offer support services to people with cancer, educate and train educators. Last year i hosted it with one of my colleagues but she did a lot of the heavy lifting. This year she's on maternity leave so i did it myself and it was v successful!! We raised over $500 :) So i am feeling v pleased and tired.

i have been thinking about my general state of being and that although i often feel like there is a LOT going on in my day to day i do think that so far this year i've been in a good place. last year was mostly about sitting in a ditch of despair sdfklkdl but the composition of my life this year has been such that i haven't been in that place. what a treat! also my house has not flooded 3 times in the last 6 months so that is certainly nice!

i've had a bit more regular contact with some of my close friends. every month i Zoom with Ellen, my friend from Norway. She's my OG online friend, we met in a Lost forum when i was like 14 LOL, we started doing regular Zooms during covid but have had a good run going lately. Although we did miss the last one because she's hecticly working on her thesis, but regardless it feels like we've been built such consistency and its so good to have that monthly check in. I've also started going out to dinner once a month with my IRL best friend, who i think i saw a grand total of 3 times in 2020-2022 lol, and THAT has been so nice. Human connection outside my household! Who would have thought!!

Also i have not been to so many live events within a 6 month period since like 2018?? All those postponed showed finally caught up with me lol. In Feb i saw Harry with my best friend and the Vamps on my own (i love a solo concert experience), in March I saw MCR with my best friend, in April I saw an Aussie comedy duo called Lano and Woodley with my family (they're like the root of mine and my brother's sense of humour) and in May i saw Kisschasy with an old highschool buddy that I still talk to a lot when i get my act together and reply to his whatsapp messages rip. So much to do!!!! I think of all the shows, my fav night this year was definitely with the Vamps, i just love them. They are so fun to share a room with, their show was so small and at a venue i love/feel comfortable at, and it was their 10 year greatest hits tour so they played all my old favs :') I love them. I do feel like i need a rest from 'events' for a bit now 😂 but it was so nice to have things on the horizon and to get dressed in clothes I haven't worn for 3 years and even to be overwhelmed by uncomfortably large events in the company of friends lol.

Oh I also finished preparing my garden! I haven't planted anything because timing-wise it just worked out that i didn't finish until a couple of weeks ago, and with winter around the corner i don't particular want to set up my garden right now. But it's all dug up and ready to go, so i've laid tarps over it and it will be ready when Spring comes :) I'll need to order some good soil and then pull out my seeds that I have from before we moved. I'm not sure they'll still be good? But we'll see what happens! I can just buy new ones if necessary. So i'm really excited that the second the season is right i can just GET GOING!! No more waiting around for the rain to stop so that i can pull out the forest of weeds, no more STUPID rose bush roots in the way, it will be go time babey.

I have been reading a lot this year, I don't think it is a coincidence that my mind has been more able to manage absorbing books now that i don't feel i am in a ditch of despair lol, my 2023 brain is like perhaps we CAN do more than passively absorb shows we've watched twenty times. i mean we are still doing that in spades for sure, but looking at words on a page for recreational purposes does not feel like too much work! our weekly afternoon tea's at work are currently book-focused too, each week someone picks a genre and we all talk about a book in that genre that we love. Me and one of my colleagues are compiling the list of books mentioned every week and sharing them on Teams as a record, its been soooo fun. The last 2 weeks were scifi and fantasy (aka what i care about) and I chose the long way to a small angry planet and The Princess Bride. Next week's topic of biography though so my run of luck has come to an end sjkdgjkdf but its been vvv fun to basically have a blook club every week! I'm hoping i get picked in the next couple of weeks so i can choose LGBT+ books a) bc it will be Pride month and b) bc i recently read that is how it always is and LOVED it so much and am v interested in what recs my colleagues will have in that genre, but there are a couple of other people that i reckon could choose that if they're picked first (which i am ay-okay with) so my backup genre is books that have adaptations (so i can talk about six of crows 😈)

anyway its chilly and i will be reading fic in bed with Sawyer for the remainder of today, what more could one want

[pynkhues]

Okay here is my argument for Kim Possible being satire so sorry for how wordy this is in advance. This is based off of the four techniques of satire being exaggeration, incongruity, role reversal and parody. I think Kim Possible uses exaggeration, parody and a little role reversal within those.

Kim Possible would be parody of most superhero shows with slight role reversal in the parody. Most superhero shows with teenagers have them being much more adult than the average teenager. Kim Possible is very rooted in her being a regular teenage girl. Her power is that she’s an insanely good cheerleader and smart which is implied to be a genetic gift from her neurosurgeon mom and rocket scientist dad. Typically these teenagers are plagued by emotional turmoil by feeling the weight of saving the world, often in secret, while a running joke on the show is Kim seeming to find the insane things she does not a big deal or emotionally damaging. Kim relies on emotional support from her parents and talks out problems with them. She doesn’t keep it a secret and asks for understanding from her family, friends and squad when saving the world interferes with her life. She attends school which also never seems to actually happen in superhero shows. Kim isn’t treated any differently by her peers and is even consistently fighting to be seen as cool by Bonnie. She doesn’t fit the weird nerd (Spiderman comes to mind) or effortlessly always on trend (Alisha from Misfits) that teenage superheros often seem archtyped into.

There’s also an episode where Ron gets studied bc they think his “Ronness”is the key to Kim’s success. They don’t believe that Kim could just be that competent without a secret advantage which they first think is Ron and later Rufus. It shows that adult professionals are literally more willing to believe in the skills of a naked mole rat than a woman.

They also exaggerate the typical male/female hero dynamics with Kim and Ron’s relationship, as discussed earlier. I think their relationship really showcases how often we force women into being the mature ones by making her so competent and him so goofy. However, they also subvert this by having Ron be genuinely emotionally supportive and intelligent. There’s episodes where he encourages Kim to be more authentic to herself. He also never belittles her achievements and is truly her loudest and proudest supporter. He frequently sincerely compliments her. He listens to her issues and is emotionally vulnerable with her. There is some role reversal here with Ron almost playing a typical damsel in distress by needing saving from Kim, being her biggest hype man and by being the person that in many ways keeps Kim grounded. I think the episode where Ron moves to Norway shows how much Kim depends on him to meet her emotional needs and without him doing so she’s unable to focus as completely on the mission at hand.

Anyways. I may be completely wrong or off base. I’m in no way an expert on heroes, narratives, gender, satire, tv or even Kim Possible. Just some high thoughts that I really hope somebody out there will enjoy, lol! Very sorry if this was dumb or disappointing but I love your blog so much and always enjoy your takes on everything. 🤍

(x)

It's not dumb or disappointing at all, anon! I loved this analysis, and particularly loved the way you unpacked a range of superhero tropes and looked at how Kim Possible subverts them. You're really making me want to rewatch the show, haha.

It's an interesting one to look at too, because there have been a lot of superhero parodies and satires out there, but they tend to lean hard into a really mean humour. Like stripping the polish from characters like Superman and Batman can only be done through exploring the toxicity of fame and power, and I love your point about how in many ways Kim Possible does it by instead exploring the space for emotional vulnerability and honesty in a way that most traditional superhero narratives eschew. It makes it feel a lot more unique and in many ways more original than shows that have even come after it, and it'd be a really interesting exercise to compare it broadly to other parodies.

Thanks for sharing!

[hopewritcs]

Hopper x reader #4 my favourite number thank you 🥰

“LIKE IT’S JULY.”

pairing: jim hopper x f!reader

song: norway.

notes: me tryin not to make this a sad hopp fic despite the song bein somewhat sad bc all these songs for hopp requests wind up being sad ( sorry i listen to a lot of sad music friends lol ). anway i hope u liked it !! set pre & throughout canon !! though it’s explained in canon reader and jim have quite a bit of history, and the effects of canon events play into everything ! 

word count: 1.8k

part of spotify wrapped drabble night : accepting ! 

You were a fan of the summer months. Summer always meant something was going to happen--while for some people it meant peace and time away from work or school, for you it had always been a time of change in your life even on top of all the normal “summer” things. 

Post graduation from college you had moved to a new town in the middle of the summer. 

At the age of twenty-three you had met someone in that town who changed your life, his name was Jim Hopper. 

But life wasn’t kind to you and Jim. 

After dancing around each other for long enough, eventually he got married and you moved away from that place ( in summer, once again ). 

You thought of him, of your time spent with him. Those summer nights that felt like they were the beginning of the rest of your life but you couldn’t bring yourself to say so to him. But he’d moved on, and you could only stare at the phone number still etched in his handwriting in your notebook, as if a memory of it all. 

Losing touch with him, and trying to move on with your life, you didn’t realize you’d accepted a job in his hometown of Hawkins until you met someone who mentioned him -- and at that point you just did your best to hide the fact you knew the man they were talking about. 

They say it’s a small world, but how small did it have to be for Jim to show up back in his own hometown for good right when you felt like the place was finally your own. You’d wished for him to be right there so many times, that seeing him show up was almost like one of those daydreams. 

It was summer when you saw him again, of course. 

He was just settling back into town, and Joyce was telling you that he had lost everything -- he was just close enough to daydream about, but still out of reach. 

He didn’t see you, really see you, until July of that year. You’d been involved in a small fender bender and the police had been called to the scene and Jim, despite being the Chief of Police, had been the one to show up. He nearly dropped the notebook that was held in his hands when he realized who was standing leaning against the car that had been hit.

He thought he’d left you behind all those summers ago. 

“Y/N?” Jim asked, blinking as he flipped through the notebook to look at something other than you. 

“Hey Jim.” He realized then, with the ease of how you spoke to him, that you knew he was in town. That you weren’t surprised to see him there. That your guard wasn’t thrown like his was. 

He was fucked. But damned if he was going to show any sign of it. 

It was easy to fall back into a friendship with Jim Hopper, because despite it all -- the time, and the years, and everything else -- both of you felt as though you were still friends. It was everything else that was going to be harder to get back. Figuring out if it was even something to get back, that was another question. 

Of course, you wanted to. The summers you had spent with him all those years ago weren’t for nothing -- but you had both changed and weathered with the years and time you had spent on your own, you had to know what was going on. 

It was July of 1983, nearly four whole years after Jim moved back to Hawkins and the two of you had begun a friendship again before you kissed again.

It had been a simple morning, you spent a lot of time with Jim. Dancing around your feelings once again, both of you. Despite both of you at separate times confiding in Joyce-- 

“I don’t want to fuck it up this time, Joyce.” Hopper had said days before the kiss. 

“What if I’m wrong and I wind up looking like a fool if I say how I feel?” You had said the night before 

--and while she was a good friend to both of you, she was a little sick of listening to your complaining instead of doing something about it. 

The morning was spent at the Hopper cabin, because you’d brought over food and welcomed yourself in like you did every so often to make sure he was taking care of himself. 

What Jim had originally meant to be a kiss on the cheek, as your head was turned to make the coffee for the two of you, had turned into a kiss on the lips as you’d turned your head to ask him a question. 

The first I love you was said in August of that same year, at the Byers’ house during a small get together that you had forced Jim to go to. 

He was clearly uncomfortable in the setting, a mixture of teens as well as their parents, but he was going for you, which was nice. 

It was, in fact, the exact phrasing that he had used. He handed you the drink he’d gone to get for you and when he came back to the corner you’d been waiting in he shook his head, taking a sip of his own beer, “Can’t believe the things I do for love.” 

You nearly choked on the sip you were taking and turned to look at him. His own eyes were wide, like he couldn’t believe he’d just said that out loud, but he knew he couldn’t just shrug it off. 

You leaned in and kissed him. “We can leave early, grumpy, cause I love you too.” 

The summer of 1984 was spent with you, Jim, and El as you helped him hide her in the cabin--the two of you were living together at that point. You didn’t know what to do with the cabin, but you had El help you in attempts to redecorate it...as best you could.

“Are you really this attached to the cabin?” you asked one July night, sitting on the porch with Hopper and El. “I’m just saying we could look at houses just a bit bigger and still this far out in the woods if you want to be far away from the rest of the world.” 

“Are you saying there’s not enough space?” Hopper asked, looking at you over his cup of coffee. 

You and El shared a glance from under the blanket you were sharing and then both turned to look at him. 

“Okay it’s...” Hopper trailed off. 

“Small.” You suggested.

“Tiny.” Eleven added. 

“Cozy.” Hopper finished his thought, rolling his eyes at the both of you. 

You sighed and unwrapped the blanket from your shoulders before turning to El with a smile, “I think we’ll tackle this another night, let’s get to bed.” You stood up, and held a hand for her to take before walking to the door and then turning back to look at Hopper who still sat on the porch steps, “You coming to bed, grumpy?”

Hopper grumbled, standing up and turning to look at the two of you. “The cabin is just fine.”

You nodded, “Of course it is.” When he was close enough you leaned up and gave him a kiss before walking into the cabin with El and pushing Jim toward the kitchen. 

“This conversation isn’t over!” He called after you as you walked with El to her bedroom. 

July of 1985, you stood in Starcourt Mall with everyone but Jim was pushing you away from it all--he wanted you with El, away from everything where it was safe. 

Promises made in the food court of that mall before the rest of that night raged on that you never thought would be kept--promises of a future you didn’t expect to come true when the only people you saw come out of the mall were Joyce and Murray. 

July of 1985 he’d promised to spend the rest of his life with you. 

Summer of 1986 was something you were not looking forward to. You were no longer counting down the days to summers like you used to. It seemed as dreary as any rainy day to you, and you hated it. 

Hawkins was no longe the place you wanted it to be, and you’d moved last summer to California when Joyce had. You’d been with the kids--with El-- more, but work consumed a lot of your time--you tried not to think about everything. 

Summer was coming, it was already the March break for school, and you’d planned to spend it with El, but you’d instead been contacted by Owens. You didn’t know how, exactly--he wasn’t exactly someone you would call a friend or a foe entirely. But that’s how you wound up going with him and El. 

Which is how you wound up in the midst of everything, yet again, with no idea what to do or how to get yourself and El out of this. 

God, all you wanted was Jim and to be counting down the days to summer. Not to be in some van speeding down the highway trying to get to Hawkins and worrying about everything else. 

When it was all over, and you had somehow wound up back at the cabin, you looked over at El with tears in your eyes but a smile on your face. 

The damned cabin. 

You couldn’t escape it. Back where you started, and everything just reminded you of him. 

El had gone off into her room, and you were moving things around in the living room. When the door opened, you assumed it was one of the other kids, so you turned to ask them for some help.

There he stood, in the doorway of the cabin. You’d barely held back your tears earlier and now, looking at him, you knew you were going to cry. “Jim?”

“Hey, Y/N.” He spoke quietly, moving toward you. When he got to you, you pulled him into your arms and held him close. 

“Not fair,” you mumbled, muffled by his chest and the tears you were attempting to keep at bay. “You totally had the upper hand on me and knew I’d be in here didn’t you?” 

You could hear the smile on his face, “Had to get you back for all those years ago.” 

When you pulled back and looked at him, really looked at him, you saw that there were tears in his eyes too. “I so hoped you would come back, I didn’t want to believe you were gone.” You leaned into him and kissed him. Like it was the first time, like you were twenty-three again and it was the first summer you’d met. 

Maybe the summer of 1986 could be something good if you had Jim back by your side. 

[naurufan999]

I recently moved out of the student village and into my own little hybel. Not sure what that is in English. But this means I finally can hang things on the walls!!! So I went to my parents to get my good stuff. Of course I had to bring my best Nauru poster back.

Sorry for the weird angle, this flat is quite odd. And small!

This one is my favorite. From the 'we're still a bit goth but now we have a stylist' period. lol. The album reminds me now a bit of Editors or White Lies. Plasma is still my favorite. The middle time going from darker to their more poppy material.

Top to bottom, left to right: Jens, Onni, Jan Fredrik, and "Akki".

I'll show more things once I pack out my stuff and get it in order.

And yes, as you see I still use DVDs. Netflix in Norway is not very good because we have to wait for whatever gets subtitled even though everybody here speaks English!

[floralcrematorium]

💕 - You've got your choice of one pairing you can canonize, but you've got to come up with how you choose to do it. Which pairing do you choose and what's your game plan for how it happens?

👶 - Which nation do you think would make the best parent?

👄 - Which nation do you think has the most fitting voice actor? Whose voice do you think doesn't work?

Thanks for the ask! Also help, I get rambly again

💕 - You've got your choice of one pairing you can canonize, but you've got to come up with how you choose to do it. Which pairing do you choose and what's your game plan for how it happens?

I answered this one for CanUkr! You can read it here. I'm not sure who else I care enough about/know enough about the relationship to canonize. I'm not ride or die about any of my ships and I wish I was as unhinged as other people. I wanna be known as the ___ person for something

👶 - Which nation do you think would make the best parent?

As much as I love the FACE fam dynamic, in canon Arthur and Francis are terrible to and for Alfred and Matthew (I say this having watched that one World Twinkle episode last night).

I don't think I can answer this one for nationverse to be honest. I'm inclined to say Yao regardless, though, just because he's seen. it. ALL. He's equipped for So many situations, however I don't see him wanting to become a parent if you consider age as well as however you perceive his relationship with Japan. Yao's in his Childless Wine Aunt era.

I have two answers for this I think?

Single Answer: Denmark. Surprising choice. I think of all the Nordics, he would be the most equipped to deal with a Child (cough, Gutters, cough). I think a lot of people are big fans of Sweden as a father figure to Ladonia and Sealand. In examining his relationship with Iceland, I think Sve is a wonderful older guardian, but I think communication may not be one of his strong suits. The same goes for Fin -- I think He can be excitable, fun, and patient, but he's be better suited for an older kid. He's like. The cool uncle who shows you heavy music, lets you take a sip of his drink, and has eclectic hobbies. In my eye, he's also a people pleaser and is also someone who prefers to save his own problems for later to help someone else. He'd get too exhausted. Now, Norway as a parent? Moving on. I'm not including Ice in this. He's not necessarily a teenager in my eyes, but he's my age whereas with everyone else I see being a bit older human-age wise. Ice isn't in the spot to be considering parenthood -- he's got his own stuff to figure out (not in the Moody Teen Way that is so often relegated to him). I also think Ice values his personal time and needs time to recharge. So this leaves Den. I think Den can be,,, wild. He can be irresponsible and obnoxious, but I think he's someone who knows how to tone shift depending on who he's with. I think like Fin, he's like a fun and excitable to a kid, but I think Den is someone more willing to put his foot down when the child's best interest is in mind. But to be honest, all of the Nordics are best suited to be uncles you visit for a weekend rather than parents in their own right.

As for a ship? My answer is: CanUkr. Surprise surprise. I think they're both patient people who also know when to put their foot down (both of them deserve to be assertive, damnit). Kateryna would be a terrifying force in the event of misbehaving children, but she's someone who would know what he child needs/wants. I also see her being like my grandmother -- My grandmother is constantly trying to take care of us and provide the things for us she never did. Matthew is the kind of parent who would invest time into his kid's hobbies. They're not Fun™ parents, but they would be able to raise a functioning and good human. I trust them not ruin a person, lol.

👄 - Which nation do you think has the most fitting voice actor? Whose voice do you think doesn't work?

I don't really have a favorite voice, but I'll tell you one thing. Todd Haberkorn HAUNTS ME. The Hetalia English dub being my first ever anime has POISONED me because every time I watch a new anime I hear a familiar voice and go on Behind The Voice Actors to figure out where I know them from, and they've usually voiced someone in Hetalia (hi, I watch dub for most anime because I can't watch watch something and I have to have it on in the background while I draw or game). Todd Haberkorn is someone I can recognize instantly and he haunts me. I don't dislike him whatsoever, but like. It triggers some sort of response from me and I'm expecting HWS Italy to come running at me full tilt.

As for a voice I don't like... Denmark. I don't think I like either of his voices? I just went and checked how he sounds before and after his VA change and thought I liked his old voice more than I actually do. I'm not sure how he's supposed to sound in my head, but neither of his voices do it for me.

I also still can't get used to England's new voice in the dub. I know why his VA had to be changed, but because he's had two new VAs, the difference is always startling.

Also okay, I lied, I just rewatched the "Every Time Norway Speaks In Hetalia" video. My favorite is Norway. I have no good reason. I genuinely don't. I know a lot of aspects about Nor aren't popular with Scandanavian fans, but his voice is a guilty pleasure of mine. I have no good reasoning for why it appeals to me other than It Just Does

Hetalia Asks

[nicegaai]

I MAXED OUT ON READMORES for my first nor/ice thoughts post so im starting a new one lol

19. nor will never let the brother thing go SPECIFICALLY because it makes iceland uncomfortable. hes amazed that ice didnt think they were related at all,, think is a strong word. it was denial, 0 logic. iceland doesnt really want to kiss him again now tbh ......... not that hes less into him. hes just confused. is this still a good idea? psych, it was always a bad idea, idiot. but he does have the okay to try again............. but he cant !! its too soon!!!!!! uwahh ..!!!

20. next time they see each other (world meeting?) nor has a lot of teasing material and it is unbearableeeeee. he doesnt even have to say anything he just has to look at ice. he is riding the dna test victory high for at least a year. even better though, he has a trump card to really freak him out. all he has to do is kiss him and it would be so so so so funny for real. he waits for a good private moment bc hes not crazy enough to do that with witnesses. people are still talking about their dna test being in the news they'll approach nor or ice with that as a small talk opener at the nation function so much. after the first few times nor is sick of it (but he hates social events anyway). iceland is somewhat better at surface level smalltalk schmoozing but he DOESN'T want to think about that test at all. its so unfortunate for him. they both leave early, theyre like wow everyone's after us ab the test, wanna get out of here? and end up walking back together. theyre in the conference hotel elevator together and its silent and nor leans over and gives him a big ol kiss on the lips. the first time since new years. catches ice way off guard, and they bicker about it, norway thinks it was comedy gold, and iceland is mad. he gets so mad that hes gonna kiss him again but harder. thatll show him. theyre already on the way to empty hotel rooms umm 😳 iceland isnt prepared to go all the way but they kiss and grind like idiots and dont talk a lot. iceland has more riding on this than nor and hes veryy nervous so nor goes at his pace. afterwards. umm. hmmmm. its late but not that late but neither wants to move. or talk about it. they curl up together and sleep

[nordic-language-love]

how did you come to decide to move to Japan? from me it seemed so sudden lol. don't get me wrong it's fucking awesome and inspiring you did that, but I experienced it in a way where one week you were just stressed and exited to go to Norway to Bergens test (or what was it called) then started learning Japanese and the next day you were just announcing you moved to Japan :D

In any case I love following this journey of yours. definitely makes me want to take my language learnings more serious because compared to you I can't even say its a hobby lol :D

lots of love to you 💜💚💜💚

Hi there!

Basically when I first started doing my TEFL course I looked into opportunities to teach abroad, and one website mentioned that Japan had a pretty good salary for TEFL teachers (it lied lmao). I'd just got curious about Japanese at that time (this was late 2020). Long story short, I sort of accidentally ended up applying for a job, got accepted, felt like it was meant to be… and turned it down. For reasons that I don't particularly care to discuss on this blog. It sucked, honestly, to the point I ended up going to the therapy for it.

Fast forward to July 2022 and the recruiter got back in touch with me to say Japan was opening its borders and was I still interested in the job. Discussed it with my boyfriend and we came to an agreement, and so this time I accepted it. There was a lot of paperwork and it was a very sensitive subject at home, and I couldn't quite believe it was actually going to happen, so I didn't really want to talk about it much here in case it fell through (although I'm pretty sure I was talking about it as early as September?)

Why Japan? Well… I wanted to experience a new culture, and Japanese culture is pretty damn far from British culture. And one of the things I figured out in therapy is that I'd got to a point in my life where I didn't know who I was or who I was trying to be and I was desperate to just. get some fucking space, frankly. I felt like everyone had expectations of who I was supposed to be and they were all just too much and I felt so lost and hopeless. I couldn't trust anyone - not even myself - because everyone told me everyone else was gaslighting me, manipulating me, trying to make me what they wanted me to be, and that any thoughts I had were some deep-ingrained trauma or an idea someone else had put into my head. Coming to the other side of the world on my own… none of the chains that held me down are long enough to reach me here. I finally feel like I can breathe and grow again. To learn about who I am without other people's expectations or needs weighing upon me. Sure, it didn't have to be Japan, but it was the opportunity I had.

And hey, there's no minimum requirement to say you study language as a hobby! Obviously I have to be serious about learning Japanese given I live here, and I'll never experience the culture properly if I can't speak the language. As for learning Norwegian, it became like, a part of my identity haha. And like I say, I was hugely struggling to figure out who I was, so I clung to it like driftwood in a stormy sea. It was the one thing I could firmly say was me, a part of myself that I discovered and I fostered and nurtured, something that no one had manipulated me into doing, a path I'd chosen to walk because it was what I wanted. So you're comparing your hobby to my lifeline. You study languages as much as and in a way that makes you happy and fulfills your needs!

Thanks for the question! Sorry the answer became an essay 😅

Curious anons get in my ask box!

[residentraccoon]

Eurovision 2023 Top 37 (updated)

1. Latvia - robbed, underrated, slept on and other similar adjectives, I love this song so much and you know this already, moving on

2. Moldova - I cannot not sing the chorus without doing the T pose dance, thanks Pasha 💖

3. Slovenia - like I said before their performance makes me smile like an idiot every single time, their joy is infectious

4. Serbia - bro is a whole mood the whole performance, I love his stage presence a lot

5. Portugal - retro upbeat folk song my beloved how can I not love this

6. Czechia - yes my girls sing it bring the girl and slavic power

7. Australia - dad electro rock let's go

8. Finland - me yelling cha cha cha eyyyyy everyday had become part of my routine ever since the ESC season

9. Estonia - so proud of the top 10 result idc if it's a bAlLaD this was a gorgeous moment

10. France - a chanter la grande franceeEEEEEEEE-

11. Malta - I'm in this song and I don't like it

12. Georgia - It's just so powerful. Thing is known

13. Austria - someone please get poepoepoe and zero dot zero zero out of my brain thanks

14. Iceland - girl is a huge ray of sunshine man how I wish I was this energetic 🥲

15. Spain - 10/10 vocals and such a moment

16. Lithuania - prosciutto tuto yea I know it's such a stupid joke but I can't not make it

17. Armenia - how does she know what I want in a future lover? Bc SAME

18. Norway - she really is the queen of kings

19. Germany - last place?? smh

20. Azerbaijan - this was so sweet and underrated, and I'm so happy that Azerbaijan chose something that's not artificial and safe for once

21. Belgium - yooo the bop, I especially love how at the beginning he got so much shade but in the end he got top 10, yes dude prove the haters wrong

22. Netherlands - preferred the old version, the new one sounded so...dead

23. Cyprus - sounds very Imagine Dragons-ish but I like it, yeah

24. Sweden - I really have no strong emotions about this but I acknowledge Loreen's amazing showmanship and voice. It just doesn't stick with me for some reason sorry :(

25. Romania - he was done so dirty #justicefortheodor

26. United Kingdom - a very competent girl bop that I could enjoy a lil, to my surprise. But those vocals just weren't it...

27. Ukraine - yo that stage show was actually sooo good!!

28. Albania - Turkish soap opera intro let's go

29. Switzerland - okay bro I got it you don't want to be a soldier

30. Italy - lovely voice but does it fall flat for me after a while...

31. Israel - yeah no I don't want to see you dance sorry

32. San Marino - ngl I do find myself humming this at times I have to admit it ain't THAT bad

33. Denmark - Dude was really struggling with those notes, it was a pleasant moment and that's about it

34. Greece - it was just good

35. Croatia - grew on me JUST a bit. Still won't listen willingly to this but I don't feel like I dislike it as much as I did a few months back

36. Ireland - the performance was so...empty

37. Poland - now you're better so low lol

[starryoong]

15 questions tagged by @xsideeffectsx ᥫ᭡

1.are you named after anyone? my mum named me after a norse god if that counts?

2.when was the last time you cried? I genuinely don't even remember.. depression, my beloved

3.do you have kids? no, and I don't want any either

4.do you use sarcasm? *bites back the snarky remark I had on the tip of my tongue* yes :)

5.what's the first thing you notice about people? usually, their humour? it's easier for me to converse with them if I feel like we're vibing

6.what's your eye color? blue/grey!

7.scary movies or happy endings? both? depends on the mood I'm in tbh

8.any special talents? I don't think so? I'm apparently good at folding clothes? is that a talent outside my job?

9.what are your hobbies? listening to music 24/7, writing and reading, art in different forms, music journalism, making way too many playlists, tidying (come through double virgo placement)

10.where were you born? a tiny town in the middle of bumfuck nowhere in norway, haha

11.do you have any pets? my family has two dogs, a dutch shepherd and a belgian shepherd, and two greek land tortoises! I'm hoping to buy my own dog this year 🥰

12.what sports do you play/have played? I used to do gymnastics for 5 or so years, and then started dancing when I was 10(?) which I stopped when I moved abroad when I was 16

13.how tall/short are you? 164cm on a good day (shut up snowy I can hear your snicker already)

14.favorite subject in school? Norwegian and English, psychology entered the bias line when I started it in high school

15.dream job? I wanted to become a vet up until I was 15 and realised my math problems were too severe for me to get into the field (found out said math problems were undiagnosed dyscalculia last year at the age of 23 after being made fun of by teachers all my life for being dumb which is fun!).

Then I wanted to become a touring live music photographer / journalist until I realised my severe anxiety and neurodivergent brain fucking loathes uncertainty and changes in routine lol.. I always had a hope of becoming a writer since I was a wee one though, I'd say I'm working on that goal as we speak..

Now I genuinely don't dream of any job, I just want to have a stable, safe job that allows me to comfortably live my life.

‎♡‧₊˚✧ ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა ✧˚₊‧♡

no pressure tags: @bbyquokka@j-0ne25@winterfloral@snow-pegasus and anyone else who wants to do it! 🫶🏻

[deep-hearts-core]

(tonight we're gonna party like it's) 1999

god damn i haven't done one of these in a while. its charlotte nilsson time baybee

Lithuania REAL SHAME about this staging. it's a nice song and aiste has a great voice clearly but she doesn't have the right kind of stage presence for this. the dancing around that she was doing didn't feel right for this genre, it was discordant and distracting. also the pink lighting didn't work. if i could go back in time and fix this i'd tell the lithuanian delegation to keep the camera close on her upper body at all times.

Belgium nice song nice voice well staged but she's too damn quiet. i can't really hear her. especially at the beginning. sad bc i have no other complaints about this one except for maybe "is that guy blowing into a horseshoe crab?".

Spain she's a good singer so it's a shame about that dress. also, the verses are kind of boring and i only really enjoy the chorus. also, i keep misremembering this song as having the tune of a bosnian song called "zena svijetom upravlja" or something like that that a friend of mine submitted to a tumblr fancontest forever ago. also also, did i mention that dress? distracting.

Croatia love the "ah-ah-ah-ah"s in the chorus. favorite thing about this song. (maybe because that's what's familiar because that's the thing that everyone puts in the fourth place compilation recap vids or whatever). she looks nice in that dress i guess but something feels kind of off with the staging. i can definitely tell that this followed immediately after dana international. there's something in the way she's moving that's making it clear she's trying to imitate dana in some way.

UK i love this one!! love a girl band, the main singer is really good, and those silver outfits are great. that "say it again, say yeah" is the most catchy/memorable line i've heard so far tonight that i hadn't already seen in a recap video. unfortunately one of the girls was a little pitchy in the high harmonies and that got on my nerves a little.

Slovenia i mean i don't love it but there's nothing to hate about it really. she sounds good. nice classic eurovision ballad.

Turkey this is every turkish entry ever, right? it's not bad really it's just not my speed. i spent most of my time watching this thinking about danish barbershop quartet the clementones and admiring the stage, because this year's stage is cool. more on that later.

Norway ngl kind of disappointed? the dance routine was good, i guess? idk it's not my kind of song and he wasn't great vocally. and that shirt wsa sort of. a choice. didn't work imo.

Denmark you can always count on denmark to do a good happy duet with a guitar. love this. if they hadn't fucked up that very last note this would have been absolutely perfect to me. <3

France like if that song "free fallin'" got eurovision'd.

Netherlands early dutch country is also every eurovision song that follows it for the next like 5-6 years, more at 10! nah but it's alright. and she's pretty, which helps. the song started before she started singing and i was like "?? this is gonna be so good?" and then i remembered it was the netherlands and my expectations instantly went medium. lol.

Poland great belt on this man. not like a literal belt but like his voice near the end when he's belting his high notes, that's good. good tone. song's ok i guess.

Iceland this song slams and i fucking love it in studio but the staging was... a little too over the top, tbh?

Cyprus her voice isn't a good fit. the slow start goes on for just a little too long and she's just kind of shrill.

Sweden it's good, i can see why it won, but her outfit is just so MUCH. i hope it was a candidate for barbara dex. the eyeshadow. the flesh colored fabric underneath the pretend crop top. no thank you charlotte.

Portugal not bad. rui bandeira is kind of a guy who looks like a girl who looks like a boy iykwim. idk it kinda sounds like all the other ones.

Ireland this song is too low for them and it does funny things to their tone quality. too much vibrato.

Austria she's cute, i like the guitar line, this is very radio-friendly and american in a way that allowed me to like... yes tune out but not tune all the way out and just kind of vibe.

Israel it is a sign of how brainpoisoned i have become that i saw a quartet of guys on the stage and thought, "ah yes, the guy in the different shirt is the lead, he has the tenor and the bass on either side of him, and the other guy is the bari". i'm in hell. good song though. i mean i guess. why is it happy birthday?

Malta their harmonies aren't really locking. given, i have a much higher bar for that these days due to the aforementioned brainpoison, but still, some of these chords are heinous. also the song is just sort of not good.

Germany song is alright except for the bridge which is unnecessarily cheesy. i mean, even for the thing that it is, which is a eurovision song.

Bosnia & Herz d... dino merlin? idk this one is weird, they're like conjugating french verbs or something and also this one was muted in the video archive i had and the dino merlin official youtube upload had terrible audio quality so i feel like i can't really judge it

Estonia the onstage aesthetic vibe of this is beautiful, and i like the song, too. it's a shame that it's not a good vocal fit for evelin. a clear precursor to randajad and good use of the stage too.

My top 23 1)Denmark 2)Estonia 3)Portugal 4)Iceland 5)Sweden 6)Austria 7)Belgium 8)Poland 9)Israel 10)Germany 11)UK 12)Slovenia 13)Spain 14)Croatia 15)Ireland 16)Turkey 17)Netherlands 18)Lithuania 19)Cyprus 20)France 21)Norway 22)Bosnia 23)Malta

shoutouts again to my friend rachel's prefsorter, because we can't always have gerbear

Miscellaneous commentary the little cgi tour of europe at the beginning was cute. but also very funny because of how squished together and contiguous everything was. lmao @ the host greeting the "distinguished guests" and everyone there in nice clothes. like wow the contest has changed in 20 years obsessed with these postcards btw. cartoon eve fully tits out. jesus represented as a hot guy in a suit. joseph and his brothers singing in barbershop harmony. the baby moses video game. priceless recaps are so short? i already have a hard time remembering how each song goes but like the recap snippets help absolutely not at all lol at the sun prop. it was a really excellent stage, honestly, a lot of contestants were able to use it really well, but after last year's debacle i just kept giggling whenever i saw the thing move. overall like...it's hard to judge the songs in this era, it's hard to rank them, because really i don't like most of them? like they just aren't really my style. i feel like for many of the 90s rankings the margins between songs are going to be very thin and i'm going to have trouble remembering a lot. i don't listen to a lot of 90s music so it's like... ok? sure? do i even know if this is good? no i don't!