#THEY ARE SO!!!! I love mixing my hyperfixations

[ally1uvsu]

Breathe. | Choi su-bong (Thanos) x Nam-gyu

Summary; Where Nam-gyu basically has a breakdown inside the bathroom followed by huge dysphoria and the person he least expects talks him through it all.

Info; Gender dysphoria, trans!Nam-gyu, it’s like one of my hcs pls don’t attack me, anxiety, panic attacks, mentions of death (avrg squid game behavior), drugs, mentions of blood, idiots in love, kissing, actually js fluff mixed w angst, Nam-gyu w sensory issues if you squint!!, self-harm but without necessarily cutting, suicidal thoughts, bathroom fight shit doesn’t happen for their sake, they’re both emotionally constipated, Thanos just being Thanos honestly, coming out of the closet, unbinding, bruises, cuddling, acceptance, probably ooc but again who cares, just tbh actual tooth rotting comfort for our boy<3

Notes; I think writing became sort of a hyperfixation.. it’s so bad I gen can’t sleep so here you go goobers! Also don’t attack me for the trans nam-gyu hc I js saw that man and I was like; ‘this one’s going to my big hcs list’..

Nam-gyu has been feeling shaken ever since they came back from that stupid mingle game, sure, he was high off his mind just like Thanos was but.. he wasn’t sure why he felt so shaken up. The blood tainted his once pristine white sneakers, making him grimace as he remembered the pools of blood on the floor.

Fidgeting with his anxiety ring, Nam-gyu bit the inside of his cheek as he pushed the bathroom door open. He could still very clearly hear the screams and shouts of the people dying outside, the cries piercing his soul. He cursed under his breath, leaning against the sinks.

It took him a bit to realize his hands were fucking shaking like hell. He brought a hand up to his hair to tug on it, feeling that desperate urge again. But he stopped, instead, he kept his gaze down on the sink as that same hand that was once meant for his hair turned the tap on.

He splashed cold water onto his face, once, twice, thrice. And then with the support of both hands, he looked at himself in the mirror, he still had fucking blood smudged on his face. His stomach churned, the back of his hand wiping the blood away, completely forgetting about the tap, rather, he just let the water keep running.

Nam-gyu couldn’t help but stare at himself in the mirror, had the drugs seriously worn off that quickly? No, he didn’t think so. Maybe the real problem was him, he hated feeling affected by that stupid fucking game.

But of course he was the problem, it wasn’t a surprise. From a problem to another, as quick as it came, his thoughts began scattering, his hand fidgeting with his ring viciously as he tried to will his body and mind to calm the fuck down.

Again, Nam-gyu looked at himself, really did. And he cringed at the sight, some of his hair was sticking to his face, he looked exhausted, which was no surprise. And then finally, his gaze focused on himself overall, most importantly, his features. He remembered Thanos, hell, he was so.. masculine.

It wasn’t only his personality, but his looks. Compared to how he looks, Nam-gyu looked horribly like a girl, something he despised to be or even think he would ever be. But in this moment, he just knows he looks like a girl.

Nam-gyu cursed under his breath as he ducked his head down, nimble fingers tightening around the sink as he tried to at least regulate his breathing, but he felt sick to his stomach. Not only because of that stupid round but because of himself.

The way he looked made him want to carve himself out, maybe get out of this skin somehow that seemed to trap him in a place where he felt like he was constantly going to lose his fucking mind.

He shivered, fuck, when had he gotten so cold? The feeling wasn’t exactly unwelcome, anything rather than this was.

He swallowed hard, feeling the itch on his skin. He got that whenever he was in moods like this, it’s as if his body knew he wanted to claw himself out of it, it was ironic.

Nam-gyu felt nothing short of pathetic, and yet he began itching his skin. He damned himself for not bringing a small knife with himself, it could have done wonders to what hems feeling right now.

The itching just intensifies, it begins to hurt. But it’s a welcome feeling of pain. His mind drags him to the lifeless corpses he could see through the slit on the door, eyes glazed and blood seeping out of them as the gunfire ceased.

Nam-gyu could feel his vision get blurry, slowly, reverently but surely. He bit down on his lip, the hand that wasn’t viciously scratching his arm as if to try to get himself out was clenched in a fist, his nails, albeit short, dug into his skin.

He was crying again, Nam-gyu hated feeling like this. Hell, he hated everything. He just desperately needed to get out, or maybe all he needed was a bullet in his brain, out there he was nothing and in here he was worse than nothing. Maybe he could steal a pill or two from Thanos to calm his nerves, but it didn’t feel ideal, especially when he became sober so quickly.

His mind felt hazy as he furiously scratched and dug his fingers and clawed at his skin in his arms, he couldn’t see because his eyes were so damn foggy. He couldn’t hear anything since the only thing he could hear was his heart beat thudding strongly in his ears, a sickening reminder he was still alive and would be inside this fuckass body.

He bit his lip to stifle what he guessed was a sob, his hands were shaking again, and Nam-gyu felt like he couldn’t fucking breathe. His chest felt heavy, too constricted to suck in too much breath, the exact amount he needed.

He winced as he moved, the pain finally seeping in. He remembered binding tightly before leaving to this place, so.. he probably hasn’t taken this stupid binder in three days straight, oh, Nam-gyu bet this would do a number on this situation.

A quiet sob left his lips as his legs wobbled, doubling over while one hand still held tightly onto the sink, the water still running. His legs felt like jelly as his hand went to his chest, this was pure fucking torture at its finest, even though this was his own fault.

The reason why he’s like this right now is because he isn’t a fucking boy, Nam-gyu gritted his teeth. He would be able to breathe properly if he was a boy, he wouldn’t need to bind his stupid chest if he wasn’t a boy, he wouldn’t need to cry himself to sleep or fight with internal transphobia if he was a boy, Nam-gyu was just playing a boy, he realized. Or maybe it was just his mind speaking.

He only panicked further when he couldn’t breathe properly anymore, he was practically wheezing. And he was alone in the damn bathroom.

But not for long, really. Because Thanos apparently couldn’t leave people fucking alone when they took too long. Thanos, as always walked in carelessly, not noticing the scene at first.

"Hey, Nam-su, you were taking forever, bro. What else could be better than talking to the great Thanos?" But the next moment, Thanos knew something was off. First of all, he didn’t get a reply, and second of all, he could hear quiet sobs.

His gaze darted around until it fell on a familiar bob, Nam-gyu was sunken to his knees, shaking. Visibly crying and wheezing for air, Thanos didn’t know how to react. He was never good at comforting people, and wasn’t the best with making them feel better through words.

And yet, either way, his feet unconsciously moved to Nam-gyu as he crouched down in front of him. The other man seemed too caught up in his panic to notice, so, gently, Thanos reached out very slowly and wrapped his hand around Nam-gyu’s wrist.

The eyes that met his own were all familiar, but also weren’t. Nam-gyu had a huge ego and was a huge goof, but now.. Thanos couldn’t help but frown as he saw the tears clinging to his eyes as they slipped down, collected on his chin and then fell. His gaze was wild, hell, almost even scared. Thanos was definitely sure this was the closest to frightened he’d ever see Nam-gyu get.

"Nam-gyu, hey, hey man look at me." Thanos said as he held the other’s chin, it was almost scary how he was shaking so badly. "You need to take a breather, you look like you might run out of breath." Thanos said, but it didn’t do anything. Goddamn it, Thanos hated not knowing what to do, hated feeling powerless.

"I c-" He heard Nam-gyu choke out, was he trying to say 'I can’t'? Thanos was worried as hell, he couldn’t understand shit while his friend was nearly out of fucking breath.

Nam-gyu’s hand clawed at his chest, as much as he felt scared to come out, which mingled with his whole anxiety, Nam-gyu felt like he was being tortured. And thankfully, Thanos got the hint. "Is it something wrong with your chest?" He asked as he saw how Nam-gyu seemed to try to get something out. So instead of questioning, he shut up and began taking the tracksuit jacket with the other’s number off. Then, his shirt.

Thanos could easily tell Nam-gyu was almost afraid of this, he was hesitant, tense, even. But if this was cutting off his air supply, Thanos would have to get whatever this dude was using or wearing off.

His lips parted in a small 'O' as he caught the sight of a chest binder, but he brushed it off, now wasn’t really the time to be shocked. "You need to get this off before you pass out or some shit." Thanos said, and Nam-gyu just nodded, feeling lightheaded already, sobbing hurt, trying to suck in a breath hurt like a bitch.

He turned around with his back to Thanos as he felt the other unclasp the binder, his hands were too shaky to work something out, and he felt instantly relieved, like a pressure in his chest was gone, but he still couldn’t properly breathe. But before he could ponder on it too much, Thanos was already speaking up.

"Try to match your breathing rhythm to mines, in and out very slowly." He finally said, and Nam-gyu complied. After what felt like five minutes, Nam-gyu finally had managed to breathe. Calming down as he let out a shuddering sigh, sniffling and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. Great, now he had a headache and he felt pathetic.

He had forgotten about his binder, though. He was snapped out of it when Thanos began awkwardly talking; "You uh, really shouldn’t use that thing for too long. It was too tight, dumbass." The words didn’t have his usual bite to it, he seemed almost.. worried, as if he would be, Nam-gyu thought.

"What else would I wear, then, genius?" He snorted, actually caught off guard when he felt his shirt slip back on and the sound of a jacket unzipping. He turned around to see Thanos handing him his jacket, for some reason it was somewhat baggier than his own. Or maybe Thanos was just looking for an excuse for Nam-gyu to wear it. Either way, he was quick to put it on and zip it up. Maybe he was right, plus, Nam-gyu didn't want bruised ribs.. more than they already were. And his chest really wasn’t that hard to hide either way, Nam-gyu was just a bit paranoid over it, and binding felt more safe.

He sat down and leaned against the wall with his head tilted back, he felt exhausted, really. The silence became somewhat awkward with a tinge of comfort. "I’m not going to judge you, you know that, right?"

Nam-gyu paused, finally catching Thanos’ eyes. "You don’t have to lie if you find me a freak, I mean, hell I’d understand if you didn’t want a fake b—" Before the final words of the sentence could even tip off his tongue, Thanos shushed him.

"Do not say that, you hear me?" Thanos scoffed. "To me, you’re still the same crazy junkie who gets me, I’m not about to kick you out." Nam-gyu felt a weird flutter in his chest and maybe more weight being lifted off of his shoulders.

"I don’t see you any differently from how I used to." Thanos added, averting his gaze. "So, you’ll still give me the pills?" Nam-gyu added jokingly, but deep down he was being slightly serious, as much as he relied on Thanos, those pills kept him somewhat more sane to not hurt himself. "You never change, do you? I would call you a drug addict but I’m nowhere better."

Nam-gyu sniffled, ducking his head down as he let out a quiet smile before looking back up again, and then, their faces were a bit closer than he initially thought they were. And Thanos was looking at his lips. And then the next second, he felt his lips on his own.

They were slightly cracked, chapped against his own as he kissed him back, nothing too rough or demanding, it was pretty.. gentle. His lips felt sweet, and he found himself leaning into it, it was weirdly calming. Soothing to his soul in a way he didn’t quite dislike.

And yet, the moment was just ruined by a guard knocking on the door loudly declaring the lights would shut off soon. They both broke away, and Nam-gyu shoved his binder somewhere inside his pocket, ignoring how it appeared like a bundle inside of it and cleaned his face, following right behind Thanos who went in front.

As expected, most players were already in bed by the time they were there back, Nam-gyu really just felt the need to knock the fuck out, it felt like the only thing that would really calm his headache down.

As they walked towards their designed bunks, Nam-gyu held onto Thanos’ pinky finger, letting the other just lead him, really. He didn’t think much of it when Thanos finally lay down and motioned for him to do the same.

Nam-gyu lay next to Thanos with his back pressed to his chest, closing his eyes that were so heavy that he thought he might as well fall asleep standing up. He felt one arms around his waist, and one on his hair, deftly twirling a strand. It was easy to lull him to sleep, he was already pretty much exhausted anyways.

Maybe Thanos wasn’t the worse person in the world, in the end.

I wrote this while half asleep and while I did my biology work, srry for anything. Also I am not transgender so forgive me if I did anything wrong, I didn’t mean to be offensive in any way!! Anyway, enjoy<3

[moons-among-distant-stars]

HI!!!!! SORRY IT'S TAKEN ME SO LONG TO RESPOND!!!! BUT I STARTED READING CHAPTER 1 OF OTC TODAY SO I THOUGHT I OUTA RESPOND!!! SPOILER CUT

ooooo yayayayayay im so excited to meet them!!!

aaa im so blinding normal about sif being the sheep!!! cause ya!! ofc he wants to follow!!! ofc he doesn't want to lead!!! the universe Leads!!! we can only Follow!!!!

:((( they can fit so much shame... they need a hug

staaaars starsabovee you best not!! you better not!!!

so fair!!! love projecting stuff on to my favourite characters it's the best (shoutout my own ocs that are like a part of my soul)!! also as a sidenote fuck the capitalist and ableism-upholding notion that like we are self dependant day-to-day? like no we're not?? at all??? and we shouldnt be!! we shouldn't be expected to be!! that's not how humans were built!! we were built for community and support!! anyways ramble over, 7 YEARS??? okayokay i'll trust

hehehehe sif's just silly like that, definitely not because their whole childhood and life and people and culture was erased via wishcraft

OOOOO i wanna know the name!!!! (also i like Kaia! good name!)

I AM IN YOUR WALLS!! CAUSE IT'S COMFY!! SNACKS!!

hehehehe always the last to realize!! and she's so real for that (she's just like me fr)!

oooo okay okay thank you!!! i am not french (i do speak some but it's bastard french, not even quebecois, worse) so i cannot say nothing!! ooo siffrin hazelnut!! w/ calling them saffron that would be sillier, siffrin aveline saffron hazelnut

so siffrin's always been making a home in the house of change, fucked up that vaugarde's house probably reminder him of home while he still remembered home

oooooo lucien florist has islander decent!!! and is a florist!!! w/ the king flower dialogue that's interesting!!! cause in vaugardian culture you only give someone a flower if you like them but in islander culture you can give a flower to anyone who's important to you, i wonder if there's flower language in islander culture!! i wonder what amount of islander tradition got mixed into coastal vaugardian customs!!! i love cultural exchange in worldbuilding!!

DDDDD: how could you do this to me (i will i will, in time lol)

ooooo very interesting!!! are they like bird feathers?? like what kind of bird would they be closer to? (so i can visualize) ooo genetics okay okay trust

YESYESYES!!!! YAAAAAY ISLANDER EUPHRASIE!!!

oooo okay okay!!! im so here for that!! UGH i would actually sob if like the hairbrushing scene he asks mira for help! i would sob at the tenderness of her picking through his feathers, his shame, his self hatred, his last connection to home

THEY DO!!! YAY!!! hehehehe i love that, just a very much no touch stay away :D also it'd be funny if pre the party finding out about sif's wings they just assume that's when he gets his period and so at first try and bring him some stuff to help and he's like ?????

OOOO YAYAYAYAY I CANT WAIT!!!

WOAAAAH i wanna see loop's wings!!!!! :O that'd be so cool!!!

SO TRUE i also hear everyone's voice as the jello stream voices, like i don't hear written things in ppl's voices really but i assocciate them w/ those voices!!

i... i may try to do a shitty little sketch mayhaps.. i do have time this evening, fair warning i am not an artist im just so very normal about these characters (not hyperfixated at all idk even know what that is)

but happy holidays!! and a happy new year!!!!

(also if you want my thoughts on OTC i will happily give my silly little thoughts i've been writing down)

HELLO HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVE @moons-among-distant-stars I COMR WITH A PRESENT.

OTC/DEISY RAMBLING!

im not warning for spoilers because im too tired to do that LMAOO but im putting most of this under the read more

So i saw one of ur reblogs to my reblog of ur reblog (a lot of reblog there) and i was like. Im gonna ramble again!! Mostly ab Sif’s wings!! So ya!!

No, Siffrin does not like his wings. They view them as a burden, as he can’t use them to fly, glide, or anything, and for other reasons. One of those being the fact that it’s a connection to the King, as he has wings too. But, it’s also not just with the fact that they’re just there, no, it’s also appearance wise. Their wings have shades suspiciously close to the shades the King’s wings once were before he was frozen in time. I WONDER WHY!! bats my eyes at you aggressively

Siffrin has trust problems when it comes to his wings, too. He’s so ashamed of them that he doesn’t let anyone outside his family see them, and even then that’s iffy on some days. Only a select few can even touch their wings without asking, those people being Isabeau, Loop, Colette, Léonce and Lucien.

Due to this hatred for his wings, Siffrin hardly takes care of them on some days. The only reason he does on most days is because Odile told him to, and Siffrin’s a sheep most of the time, not a shepherd (ouch, sorry Siffrin… LMAO). And when they don’t want to, then Léonce and/or Loop help him with it.

Sure, Isabeau thinks Siffrin’s wings are very cute, and yeah, it helps a little, but it doesn’t fix Siffrin’s insecurity and loathing of them. Siffrin’s self-hatred runs very deep, but, if you want a good side, it doesn’t run so deep that Siffrin would consider getting rid of them. That’d be severing one of the last links he has to his home, and that’s the last thing they want to do.

A. TIME FOR FLUFF!! Grabs you by the shoulders. Since Siffrin has wings, that means that normal clothing… really wouldn’t work for him. Before the events of IBaS,iTaT!ISAT, Siffrin stuck with cutting wing holes into his shirts, but after the loops, Isabeau began helping Siffrin with that, so now, most of Siffrin’s shirts and such are made by Isabeau. Isabeau has offered to do the same for Loop but Loop very quickly denied it and said they’re fine and they don’t need anything when they can steal from Siffrin. Which… is true. They do that sometimes LMAO.

Im giving you more fluff to balance out the angst. I did some thinking a few days ago and decided THIS!!!: Siffrin washed up in Vaugarde at 16 and Léonce found him (already canon) - they very very likely legally adopted him (translation: she did) since he was a child at the time and yk that child needed a guardian, (and fuck, sometimes he still does have you SEEN the stuff he gets into sometimes?) and well, they stuck to her like glue. Léonce’s last name is Aveline, and by proxy, that became Siffrin’s last name. So, technically, Siffrin does have a last name, which is Aveline. I really need to write a scene where Léonce full-names Siffrin in a tone of an annoyed mom 💀 (“SIFFRIN AVELINE.” LMAOO)

Due to the loops, Siffrin totally forgot about this until he went to Kaia with the party. Then he remembered. He has yet to even bring it up with the rest of the group but Odile has pieced things together based on observations of how Léonce treats Siffrin god awfully like a child of her own… so has Isabeau… but the others remain unknowing LOL

OKAY END OF YAP. IF U HAVE ANY QUESTIONS SURROUNDING THIS AU PLS PLS PLS ASK ME I WANT TO YAP MORE.

[trollex-is-gay]

Completely forgot to follow up to this post but HERE WE GO !!!

Also buckle up this post is long bc if there's one thing I will not do it is make brief post. Also I have a lot of opinions on this.

First off I have to put the one that's been on my mind the most: I think Velvet and Veneer would get on great with Electra but specifically two different versions of him. Velvet would vibe with pre-2018 rehaul Electra and Veneer would lean closer to post-2018 rehaul Electra. Both versions are major huffy puffy rich divas who don't like things not going their way, but post-2018 holds a slightly more mellow tone to him while still being just as much of an antag as his colorful counterpart, which I thing matches Velvet and Veneer pretty well. Idk if anyone else has noticed but Velvet has brighter and more saturated eyeshadow than Veneer in their final fits, at least it looks that way to me. Pictures for reference it makes more sense this way:

Second I have to mention one that's stuck to me hardcore and that's Poppy and Pearl but SPECIFICALLY post-2018 Pearl. Any possible starlight express fans seeing this post might think pre-2018 would be more sensible bc they're both pink but the thing is they have major personality contrasts. I think that post-2018 Pearl would get on better with Poppy because she has a younger and more peppier feel to her than her counterpart does, what she lacks in color she makes up for in being So Incredibly Confused all the time and honestly she just radiates Poppy to me far more than pre-2018, so yeah I think post-2018 Pearl would be good friends with Poppy. Hell great friends even. Though I ALSO think that Poppy would get along great with Rusty because he's a very excitable character and he has the EXACT determination and drive to succeed that Poppy has, the biggest difference between them though is that Rusty is a lot quicker to give up, he's got support but where Poppy has an entire kingdom at her back Rusty only had a handful of people and only two of them were complete steady support (I'm not knocking the Rockies bc their advice to him was genuine but hey read the room he knows the system sucks). Though on that note I think Rusty could get along good with Branch too, probably a tad bit closer with Poppy but they'd both be his pals in my eyes.

Poppy how come u get two cool train friends who happen to be a couple!!

Next up, I really do believe that both Greaseball and Flat-Top would get along with ALL of the rock trolls. But like specifically the rock trolls. Genuinely. Flat-Top would be more receptive to all of them while Greaseball would be less inclined to get personal with a lot of them and would chill better with the more titular guys like Barb. Flat-Top is just generally very punk and wild while Greaseball is very self-confident. I don't know how well Val and Flats would get on but I do believe he and Riff might get long better than he would any of the others. Greaseball would however get along best with Barb and mostly tolerate the others, maybe he'd enjoy Demo's company, but DEFINITELY not Blaze Powerchord. GB and Electra's rivalry is canon proof that diesel CANNOT STAND people as overconfident as he is.

^^^ pictured Barb and GB being silly because Greaseball's a self-absorbed dude and Barb is aggressive but what they have in common is they're actually goobers and few people truly see this. This is also part of why I think they'd be friends.

SAME PICTURE. Flat-Top is the brick truck on the left btw.

Anyway that's all I have for now it's like almost 11:50pm but I hope you see my vision and I hope I can convince people of each fandom to take a peek at the other bc as a trolls and starlight express fan I think these fandoms should have way more overlap, they're both goofy silly pieces of media that get looked down upon by the people outside of them for being fun and whimsical. Solidarity and all that.

[minxinq]

tsubaki is like a deer in headlights

[squidflavoredsoup]

pony butcher

[akemima]

Made Wally as my favourite Louis Wain painting! :)

(og painting below) (tw cat looking w big creepy eyes)

[aroacespacerock]

DEAD BOY DETECTIVES IN MY DOOM PATROL!!!

I’d seen some gif sets of these guys before, but I’ve loved seeing the doom patrol interpretation of dead boy detectives for myself. I’ve seen their own show, and while I prefer the cast in that one, Ty tennant and Sebastian Croft have been great in the roles as well!

obsessed with how Larry immediately clocked them as gay for each other

ALSO: “psh, I don’t need him to protect me” (Edwin)

“I’d do it anyway” (Charles)

screamed. Actually died.

[lunarharp]

kitchen of witch hat vibes

[halastar05]

Thoughts on Mastermind

(So yeah spoilers ahead)

So after letting my thoughts on the episode settle a bit and giving myself time to analyze, I have a LOT to say.

So first of all… yeah I think this is officially my new favorite Helluva episode.

I think this episode was pretty well paced (a little fast, but there was a LOT to cover) and also did a surprisingly good job at balancing the drama and humor. Also obviously ADORED the IMP found family showcased in this episode, they were entertaining in the first scene, and heart wrenching at the court.

Now for a bit more analysis, the way they handled the writing was REALLY interesting here. While first watching the episode, I was a little confused about Andrealphus’s plan, but after thinking about it… it’s scarily clever.

He knows that Stolas is smart in his own right, if he straight up brought him to court, he’d find a good way to argue. He knows how to work this type of stuff as shown in Oops. But if they brought in only Blitzø, they knew Stolas wouldn’t see until the broadcasted execution. He would have no time to form a concrete rational plan, Andre wants him to either act irrationally, or make himself look like a fool and incompetent. No one knows exactly what he’ll do, but Andre is giving Stolas as little time as possible to think it out. The hope is that he acts as irrationally as he has before.

And even if Stolas didn’t come, Andre purposely tries to make Stolas seem weak and somewhat helpless, incompetent. All the while he makes himself look an almost better version of our favorite bird. His backup plan is to make Stolas look incompetent and vulnerable, while it may be less immediate, with Stolas’s already somewhat declining reputation, this would make it easier for him to take Stolas’s title.

And despite being EXTREMELY irrational, Stolas did a pretty good job with his plan in my opinion. First of all, he brought ALL the theater kid energy in the song (which was an absolute banger by the way, I don’t care how cheesy the Stolitz part was I LOVE CHEESY) and did a great job playing the part. To me, this is proof that he had finally started to realize the classism. This is the type of part you can only play by understanding it even if you don’t necessarily believe it. He plays up the the classism and distaste for imps, he uses the fact that the other royals see them as useless and incompetent. And honestly, I think it was smart of him to be so vague in the song. Once again, he didn’t have a lot of time to think this through, and he somewhat used this to his advantage. Being vague added an air of mystery and made it seem like more of an unpredictable threat. He’s building up the fact that this mastermind has a dangerous plan, something possibly having to do with taking over the mortal realm. And then when he reveals himself to be the “mastermind”? Well of course he wouldn’t expose any of his “future plans”, Stolas is playing as someone who just wants the recognition and to be feared. Someone arrogant, feeling offended that an imp was getting the credit for his crimes. Claiming he has more planed while not naming those plans makes him a threat and will draw away almost any blame from Blitzø.

And of course this plan is impulsive, but he barely has any time to plan. He arrives right before the axe is about to come down on his lover’s neck. His only goal right now is making sure Blitzø stays alive. In the song he even acknowledges how impulsive it is to throw everything away for this idiot he is still frankly mad at. But he’s learned he can choose his fate, and that’s exactly what he’s doing.

And of course I ADORED the Stolitz in this episode, they were both so perfectly dramatic and the absolute SOFTNESS in the last scene had me making absolute demonic and feral noises. But, despite this somewhat being a closure to the season 2 Stolitz drama (however we do still have Sinsmas) I’m happy they’re still leaving room for more angst even with them now being able to properly blossom. This episode did an EXCELLENT job at showcasing the classism via the unfairness of the court case, so it feels fitting that at the end the power dynamic almost switches. Blitzø is now a celebrity amongst imps and lower class demons, while Stolas essentially lost everything, including his daughter. And while I definitely think this is setting up for angst in at least the next episode (in which I very much think they’re going to go and try to save Octavia from her bitchy mother), this power dynamic is going to feel different, because while there is still somewhat a power dynamic now, there is also a much larger level of understanding between the two of them. They now feel more capable of facing this together, there is less doubt of feelings. I’m REALLY excited to see how they handle this, and yes I also am an absolute sucker for hurt/comfort.

Those are most of my major thoughts in this episode. I loved every single part of this beautifully dramatic episode (yeah I expectantly loved Vassago) but most of the other things I would bring up have already been said. Plus this post is too long so yeah that’s it for now.

[tullecake]

HI HELLO just so you know if you ever end up making an au or a crossover for Zack&Ray and Shadow&Maria you have at least one person interested in that!!!!!

wayyy ahead of you >:D

[scificrows]

Is there a 300 page essay about Murderbot's armor (specifically the opaque helmet) as a not-so-subtle metaphor for masking in a clearly neurodivergent character already? Because I need it.

The way Murderbot is unvoluntarily without its opaque armor in All System Red in front of the crew (i.e. unmasking) and appears surprised at its own strong facial expressions and other people's reaction to it? The vulnerability that comes with that and how Murderbot spends pretty much the rest of the book wearing or actively missing its armor which keeps it safe from the mortifying ordeal of being known (yet sometimes other characters suggest it might help for it to not opacify the helmet in order for others to see it as a person and to trust it (and in the end idk if it would have achieved the rewards of being loved by its humans and have had its needs met if it hadn't unmasked in this relatively safe environment sometimes)).

Also there's the whole avoiding-looking-directly-at-people-and-using-drones-instead thing which Murderbot usually hides using the opaque helmet, but whenever it doesn't have that people notice it and many react negatively/confused. I think that's a whole neurodivergent-applicable situation in and of itself? Like damn

And then Mensah encourages Murderbot not to wear armor on Preservation station since it would not need it there, Murderbot is hesitant but ends up not wearing any (like 4 books later when we finally get to that bridge) (going for the comfortable clothes it chose for itself instead, with very strong feelings about the whole being able to make choices thing that I cannot go into further at this point because I would absolutely end up BITING SOMETHING OR SOMEONE).

And I'm not going to advocate for unmasking all the time in any setting because hell no, sometimes it absolutely sucks and people are irritated by Murderbot's now visible quirks and are afraid of what they don't know, but many GET TO KNOW Murderbot better and because there are other people that make sure Murderbot is safe and respected and are willing to get people fired for it if they disrespect it (Pin-Lee my beloved) Murderbot can experiment with this situation without being exiled to some abonded part of a planet and other people are forced to spend enough time around ot to learn to respect it and even like it. I just....... It must be so scary and Murderbot is handling so much at once and in this essay I will

PS sorry this is a disorganized mess but so am I and I have so many Thoughts and even more Emotions and so little patience.

[mishalikessoundsandcolours]

For some reason this song title reminds me of The Man Who Fell To Earth in a way

Like partially it's because of the word 'subterranean' since Bowie's track Subterraneans from Low was initially written when he tried to do the soundtrack for tmwfte and other than that it's just the feeling of the song ig? I know it's not what it's really about, that was just my first association, it is really beautiful though (me and my piano teacher went on a tangent about Radiohead today so that's what I've been listening to all evening lol)

[overlordneptune]

Listen I know it’s not my best work but I had to finish at least ONE of my halloween sketches, right?

…it’s still Halloween somewhere, right?.?

Oh well!

Point here is, I think Simon listens to vocaloid and Athena already has the Akita Neru side-ponytail so it’s only fitting.

[escxelle]

just thinking out loud but someone should totally make a wangxian stardew valley mod

[unlucky-lemon]

I love gems new dredge theme mostly cause I love dredge but if you think that means i'm not gonna draw her as a caribou anymore you are dead wrong

you can pry deer gem from my cold dead hands and even then i will drag you to hell with me

[whatareyoudoingwithamaserati]

Do you have the links to ashswag on internet archive ? (Hyperfixation has gone brrrr recently lol) ¤3

I can do you one better, and link you over to the lifesteal vod archive! It is honestly a godsend in the age of streams as lost media, and the archivists have my heart

You should be able to cell search if you’re in desktop, but mobile can be a dick about it, so if you’re not in the mood to column sweep:

House arrest vods one and two

He did WHAT to the mothership???

Zam gets sent to hell

Genesis SMP (one, two, three)

Kaboodle SMP (one, two, three, four, five, six)

KabSMP with lifesteal near the end

PVP legacy with a bit of gensmp at the end

PVP legacy part two electric boogaloo

Their health is linked?!

Lifesteal season five (one, two, three, four (marriage edition))

Minecraft singleplayer

Skyblock randomizer with Zam, Redd & KyleEff

Lifesteal public