#THE CRINGIEST SHIT IS SUDDENLY SO HOT

[echoesofadream]

i need him oh my god everyone i need him

[faerielleart]

who is here for a really bad and random high school au that is completely self indulgent yo

in which levi loses a bet with erwin and mike and is forced to audition for their school’s production of les misérables, he tries to mess up the audition but somehow he still sucks less than everyone so he ends up getting the part of marius??? and he can’t quit because it will influence negatively on his grades??? idk imagine levi reading the script without knowing shit about the play and reading all the cheesy lines for the first time and him hating every single thing about this situation until the first day of rehearsal where he meets the person who will play cosette, his weird schoolmate hanji who shares some classes with him who is always spending time in the school laboratory to do experiments and shit and oh. Oh.

at first dude wants to Scream because he just can’t bear the thought of acting like a booby who is madly in love (quoting old les mis memes from years ago here) with this wEiRdO who somehow has a pretty fucking amazing voice and wow maybe this weirdo,,,,, isn’t a bad weirdo. how bizzarre

Maybe just maybe as the days go by they start spending time together because hey! Looks like they are polar opposites but at the same time they have SO! MANY! things in common!!! and they eventually use rehearsing as an excuse to spend even more time together! and they bond over the fact that they’re supposed to play characters who are SO distant and different from how they are irl and levi finds out that hanji tried to audition as a joke but got the part bc she can actually S I N G like an angel and has a really solid head voice and range despite being a mezzo and cosette needing a soprano bc her parents forced her to take lessons, while levi despite having a decent singing voice actually had to have the songs lowered a lil bc bby is a baritone in a tenor role and has never had lessons and can’t support all the notes but fear not! Hanji offers to teach him some tips and tricks and whoops now they’re spending even more time together

And maybe just maybe it becomes easier for levi to sing “in my life she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun, and my life seems to stop as if something is over and something has scarcely begun”, maybe it comes natural for levi to stutter his line in “a heart full of love, a heart full of song, i’m doing everything all wrong” because?? he is looking right at hanji’s really pretty brown eyes and he can’t concentrate?? and he hates feeling like this lmaooo like sweaty palms butterflies fast heartbeat,,,,, boi is in love and he doesn’t realize it he just thinks he’s constipated

anyway let’s spice shit up and add erwin to the mix! erwin knows hanji, they’re childhood friends and they actually met through their singing lessons, the dude who was going to play enjolras gets idk chicken pox and the director is frantically looking for a substitute, levi wants to get back at erwin for making him audition in the first place (it’s all in good faith tho it’s a joke and they’re best friends dw he just wants to have a lil revenge) and suggests erwin, not knowing that he and hanji know each other and that he actually has been trained in singing so yeah erwin gets called for a last-minute audition and dude SMASHES it the director’s crying tears of joy they found their authentic tall hot blonde enjolras who looks like he’d be a great commander and people would die for him (;DDDDD) and during rehearsal levi finds erwin and hanji chatting like old friends!! and dude’s like wtf do u know each other??? and hanji says hell yes we studied together since we were children :D and just because i am huge huge erumike trash lemme say that mike got a lil part bc they needed ensemble members and he got to play grantaire so yeah enjoy both e/R and erumike there we go erwin gets to act with his boyfriend!! and they both watch levi and hanji during rehearsal and see how they obviously pine for each other but are far too oblivious for their own good so they decide here and there that they must get those two together bc it’s exHAUSTING to watch them stare lovingly into each other’s eyes and hold hands and kiss and then brush it off saying “it’s just acting we literally have to play a couple”

anyway the day of the show is here ladies and gentlemen levi is nervous af but doesn’t show it, he has to act like a lovesick fool in front of the whole school, the students, the teachers, the parents, EVERYONE and oh my god i hate it here might become his gratuation quote but all he needs is hanji backstage who squeezes his hand and whispers “can’t wait for you to sweep me off my feet shorty” which is extremely cringy but hanji did it on purpose just to see levi get embarassed and he does lmao so yeah the show goes amazingly! levi went flat a few times on the higher parts but it’s totally normal bby’s not trained and he did great everyone praise the birthday boy he deserves it

it’s after the show that things get a lil sad for our boi bc now he doesn’t have to rehearse anymore and is afraid that hanji won’t spend time with him anymore bc the show’s over :(( but fear NOT hanji plans on glueing herself to his side for the rest of the schoolyear and until they graduate and even after that and years later they’ve graduated college they’ve been living together for a while and they go to see the actual show on bway done by professionals and hanji acts weird all evening and OH as they’re going home she stops in the middle of the streets and whips out two lil matching rings,,,,,,, and says the cringiest cheesiest fucking thing in the world that has levi groaning and facepalming,,,,,, hanji says “will u be the marius to my cosette” and yeah levi just sighs and puts the ring on his finger and they smooch under the moonlight aw isn’t that CUTE and they lived happily ever after victor hugo is smiling down at them from the afterlife and patting himself on the back for helping them get together

NOW THERE’S TOO MUCH FLUFF AND I NEED ANGST TO BALANCE IT OUT so imagine this is also a reincarnation au and whenever levi sings “empty chairs at empty tables” he gets a weird feeling in his stomach and he gets really emotional singing “oh my friends my friends forgive me that i live and you are gone, there’s a grief that can’t be spoken, there’s a pain goes on and on” and “oh my friends my friends don’t ask me what your sacrifice was for, empty chairs at empty tables where my friends will sing no more”?? He blames it on the character getting to him too much but then he sees the scene where the students sing drink with me and the lyrics “drink with me to days gone by, can it be you fear to die, will the world remember you when you fall, could it be your death means nothing at all, is your life just one more lie” sound really familiar and resonate with him somehow as if he heard similar words somewhere else already, he sees erwin playing enjolras and being a commander giving orders and singing “let others rise to take our place until the earth is free”, he sees the scene where all the students get shot at the barricade and die one by one and he feels his head pulse and he has the strongest feeling of deja-vu and suddenly everything goes black and he wakes up in the infirmary with a very worried hanji sitting on a chair beside him and he really can’t explain what happened except that he feels like he just woke up from a very long dream and he feels like he fought through a battle and hanji just waves it off as him taking the stanislavski technique a bit too seriously for a high school play but the feeling doesn’t really ever go away and sticks with him even years later whenever he hears les mis being mentioned

[animentality]

it’s baffling to me that tumblr and other degraded areas of the internet have suddenly decided that 14 year old girls writing gay fanfic and drawing gay fanart of two fictional men is equivalent to guys who demand their girlfriends make out with other girls cuz it’s “hot” or constantly beg for hot FFM threesomes on Tinder. 

How fucking often do you really think a teenage girl is going to pressure an adult/ teen gay couple to make out in front of them? 

What, at a con? You’re more likely to run into a furry with nipple clamps and a dog collar. Also, it’s a fucking con, no one with any social grace goes to a con. 

What, in public?

How many gay men in the world of gay men have ever had a girl, or even a grown ass woman, come up to them and said omg you two are so hot? Let me watch you two FUCK. 

Basic human behavioral etiquette would step in, I’d fucking hope. 

At a bar? 

Maybe it happens, but most women, when they know a man is gay, are gonna say aw shucks. 

I don’t have the fucking stats, but I’d wager more straight men would beg lesbians or even straight women, to make out for them than women would ever do vice versa. 

Is watching guys make out so universally popular to all women ever that it’s going to oppress every gay man in existence? 

I don’t get it. 

I don’t get this sudden reactionary hatred. You remember 2005-2014 yaoi fandom where girls said some of the cringiest shit ever about how hot it was when two guys make out...and now you’re like that’s WRONG.

And sure, it is. 

But ye of little mercy. 

Those were fucking teenage girls. With a smattering of cringier adults, sure, but for the most part, teenage girls who had just been exposed to an alternate form of sexuality, who had mostly grown up in Western spaces and grown discontent with the trappings of boring heterosexual relationships in TV shows that consisted of hot guy and his hot sexy lamp of a love interest. 

Additionally, some of these girls exploring gay content found that they weren’t straight, and different gender identities as they grew older. 

That cringy boy x boy yaoi lemon culture at least had the effect of showing young explorers of the internet that here’s storytelling, but if it was more suited to this specific taste you never knew you had. 

And then they grew up. 

(And maybe not all of them grew up, maybe, but that’s not the point.) 

The point is you assume this weird niche internet thing is somehow mainstream and a big Problem. 

It’s fucking not.

It’s bigger than it used to be, sure. 

But i’d argue in most spaces, including this one, no one says “omg my sexy gays” anymore. 

And if they do, other people will typically say hey we don’t do that anymore.

It’s just so dumb to me. 

You’re going to act like the internet “fetishizing” gay relationships by drawing a lot of Kiribaku medieval fantasy AU is more harmful than executing gay people, corrective rape, bans on gay marriage and gay adoption, honor killings of gay relatives, etc., all that shit? 

Or are you gonna say, well, not WORSE THAN, but still bad- 

I’m sorry, how? 

Again, how? 

If it makes you uncomfortable, if you’ve had an instance where one woman made you feel gross cuz she was fetishizing your boyfriend and you or whatever, or straight women immediately assume you’ll be their gay best friend, YEAH.

I agree, cringy as fuck and annoying and bad.

But what the fuck is this tumblr trend of equating social awkwardness and shit like that to just, Homophobia worldwide, in general? 

Even in America, there are a lot of places where they don’t serve gays, where you can’t walk hand in hand with your gf or bf safely. 

And I can guarantee you that those evangelical Christian moms throwing tomatoes at your house are not the fucking same as teenage Tumblr girls obsessed with destiel. 

Really. 

It’s fucking baffling to me. 

[binniedeactivated]

That whole denying them bc of race or career issues is a really good angst prompt...just saying👀👀

a/n; this was way past due so I hope my precious bby forgives me <3 @crocsonkrocsjams (based on her)

𝐁𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞. || 𝐡.𝐤

─▸🖤 ❝ @[@𝐛𝐮𝐠𝐬𝐛𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐲𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠.. ]

✎𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐡𝐞𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐚𝐢 𝐱 𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧!𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

✎ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞, 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭

✎ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭; 1.3k

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐞? 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞? 𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐫?

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒; 𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐞

he rushed through the streets like a madman, coddling snacks in his hand while trying to shield his face. no, it wasn’t cold outside.

heuning kai just didn’t want to be seen.

it was already late in the night, he snuck out of the hotel rooms and who knew where the saesangs were hiding. they could’ve jumped out of a bush and snapped his picture in a heartbeat. but kai was determined to get to her house and he refused to deny the fact that he was thinking about her all day.

throughout the whole world tour even, He’d been anticipating touring the United States for this very reason. The goodnight and good morning texts, flirty messages and emojis just weren’t enough. He couldn’t wait to see her and he hasn’t seen her since the last time Tomorrow by Together toured the US.

and that was years ago.

he quickly fixed himself up a bit and made his way up her apartment stairs with his heart thumping obnoxiously in his chest. he didn’t wear anything too fancy, an oversized hoodie with baggy jeans and sneakers maybe, but that was just how their relationship was. they never had to dress up for one another.

finally making it to her door he knocks softly. kai’s mind ran wild. he was almost shaking with anticipation until she finally unlocks the door. his smile was wide and he hugged her gratefully. and she looked just as beautiful since he last saw her. deep sea green eyes, almond colored skin and gorgeous fluffed brown hair.  

hesitantly but surely she hugged him back. she couldn’t deny the fact that she was happy to see him.

“kaia,”. he started, “you look so pretty”. he complimented while towering over her thick five foot five frame. she was wearing a black graphic band t-shirt and some simple spandex shorts. just something comfy for the night since she normally slept naked. but none of that would be happening while kai was around at least.

she mutters a small thank you while he takes his jacket off. 

“why are you acting so shy? you didn’t miss me?”. kai teases. 

“of course I missed you. How was the show?”. 

“it was nice you should’ve came”. 

she rolls her eyes playfully, “you know damn well I’m not getting caught up with you and your crazy fans”. 

kai laughs while swiping his thumb over her cheek softly. “aren’t you my fan too?”. 

she stifles a blush. in a way she hated how flirty kai was but loved it all at once. she smiles instead, “what snacks did you get us?”. 

“all of your favorites. I got those hot chips you like from the corner store down the street”. 

she furrows a brow, “corner store?”. 

“yeah”.

“you went to the corner store by yourself at this time of night? why didn’t you tell me I would’ve came with you”. 

he pinches her doughy cheeks as if she were a child. “aw was my little baby worried sick? i’m a big boy I can handle a corner store at 2am”. 

“oh yeah? and what if someone tries to rob you? what’s your next move?”. 

kai sucks his teeth and walks to plop himself down on the living room couch.  “as long as they don’t rob me of your love!”. kai shouts in the cringiest voice possible. she laughs, “kai!”. 

“then I’m fine!”. he continues like the silly boy he was. “seriously if you don’t hurry over here I’m stealing your honeybun”. he threatens while digging through the white plastic bag for it. she rushes behind the couch to try and snatch it from his hands but nevertheless kai moves away from her instead. 

“kai you better not!”. she shrieks playfully and kai laugh hysterically, “oh! is this hot cheetos too?”. she makes her way to the other side of the couch to try and snatch it from his hands that way but no matter what he’d always raise the bag higher, away from her short arm’s reach. 

“come on kai give it back”. she reaches desperately, not realizing that kai had her right where he wanted her. 

“give me a kiss and I’ll give it back”. he grins. 

she laughs, “boy! give me my snacks back”. 

he puckers his lips while grabbing her body and wrestling her to the floor. “please kaia please please please give me a kiss!”. he whines into the crook of her neck. she yelps at the sudden shift in positions. 

“why am I on the floor?”.

“because you’re being mean to me”. 

“you’re the one holding my food hostage”.

he shadows his lips over hers suddenly making her heart thump. it isn’t like she hadn’t kissed him before but she always got the same spark whenever she did almost as if she first met him. 

“just one?”. he raises the intonation in a question like manner without really asking a question, he just went for it. 

he sparked the flame between them both layering his delicate lips on hers with his arms caging her body. as soon as she felt his lips she hated how she instantly thought about when he’d be going back. when it was time for him to leave and go back to korea leaving her lonely once again. so for that very reason she kisses him harder hoping it would be enough to suppress the emotions she felt in his absence.

kai raises her chin a little deepening the kiss loathing in the softness of her lips and the unyielding love that ran through his veins. if the boys found out where kai was he’d be a dead man. but it was anything for her. absolutely anything. he caresses her cheeks, unapologetically using his tongue whenever he got the chance. 

her stomach churned beneath him. she was nervous and kai was eager. sometimes she felt so out of place. what was kai doing being with someone like her? kissing her? loving her? 

was it worth it?

she falters. kai detaches his lips from hers slowly and carefully wondering what was wrong. he kind of already had an idea though. 

“you know I love you, right?”. 

she nods, “I know kai. and that’s the problem”.

“why is it a problem?”.

“was it a hassle to get here? don’t you ever get tired of hiding?”. 

kai shakes his head, “it’s not that I’m hiding it’s just--”. 

“you’re hiding me? right?”. 

“what are you talking about baby? where’s all this coming from?”. 

“I don’t want to be the one that ruins your career kai. i wouldn’t be able to live with myself”. 

“you’re not ruining my career. Idols date all the time so what?”. 

“yeah sure, idols date all the time. but they don’t date black or brown people kai”. 

“why are you making it about race? you know I don’t care about what color you are”.

“but the media does”. 

“so?”. 

“so what do you think that means for you? you’ll get shitted on by the media, you’ll get lectured and in trouble by Bighit-- i don’t want any of that to happen”. 

kai sighs and intertwines his fingers with hers, kissing the back of her hand. 

“we’ll be fine I promise”. 

“but for how long? it’s only a matter of time before you get caught”. 

“why are you being like this? when we first started dating we talked about this and we both decided that we didn’t care about what anyone has to say about us”. 

“well I care now kai. your group is getting more known which only makes you a bigger target. you’re their maknae, the baby, the innocent boy who does no wrong. this type of shit can tear your image down beyond repair”. 

“i don’t care about any of that”.

“how? you worked hard to get where you are didn’t you? not every teenage boy with a passion for singing and dancing get to debut under one of the biggest companies in korea”. 

“why do you care so much? do you not want to be with me or something?”. 

“kai I love you but I’m not worth it. who am I? just a black/mexican girl living in this small town-no one knows my name, I’m not rich, I get lonely sometimes, I’m bigger than most girls---”. 

“i don’t care about that stuff so stop it. why are you belittling yourself like that?”. 

“because why do you even love me kai? what is it? am I ‘exotic’ to you? are you using me to make yourself seem more open minded? Am I one of many colored girls that you mess with while you’re touring?”. 

“stop fucking talking like that. you know none of that is true”. 

“I don’t think we should keep continuing this”.

kai could feel his heart shatter at the sound of her words. “what?”. 

“I don’t know about this relationship anymore”. 

he searches in her eyes desperately trying to find a clue. “what don’t you know about it? we love each other so we should be together no matter what anyone has to say”.

“not at the expense of your career. maybe, maybe someday we can make this work but definitely not now”. 

kai swallows the lump in his throat, “so that’s it? you’re not even going to fight for us? after everything?”. 

she shakes her head. “not right now kai. just not right now”. she mumbles meekly. kai could feel the fresh hot tears well into his eyes. he was angry and confused but most importantly he was blinded by love. he couldn’t believe she was willing to throw away everything they built just to protect his image. especially when he didn’t even care. 

he got up from the floor and slid his jacket back over his shoulders trying to hide his tears and frustration as best as he could. as bad as she felt in her heart she felt like it was the right thing to do. either this, or she was going to have to face the harsh treatment from the public when they found out their precious heuning kai was dating a brown girl. 

but even her own heart broke at the sight of kai’s tears. 

“I’m only trying to protect you kai”. 

halfway out of the door already he sniffled before he replied, “protect me or protect yourself?”. 

“kai i’m sorr--”. 

“no. I’m sorry for thinking that you loved me just as much as i loved you. thinking maybe you’d be fearless for me just as fearless as I am for you. you think I care that you’re black kaia? do you think that I care that you’re from a town in the middle of nowhere, that no one really knows who you are, that you’re thicker than most girls and look nothing like the girl idols you see on tv? I don’t care about any of that shit. you’re beautiful and you have a heart made of gold and that’s all that matters to me. you love me so perfectly. you love me how I want to be loved and that’s what I love about you. you think you’re just a worthless being but--

but I love you because you’re so much more than that”.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #238

“crimson calligraphy written on the trees, creature from the grave, headless and hellbent for me.”

Have you ever played golf? Like, mini-golf. Is there a lake near your house? No, but there's two small ponds down the road. Have you ever made your own pizza or pasta dough? No. Have you ever watched an entire season of a tv show in one day? Uhhhhh how long are the first few seasons of Supernatural? Because Jason and I fucking binged it, and I honestly think that's partially the reason I don't even enjoy TV anymore. Like I liked the show, but jfc it became torture at some point. Not his fault at all, I just never pointed it out. BUT ANYWAY, it's definitely possible we did. What did you have for dinner tonight (or last night)? A ham and cheese hot pocket. Do your parents do things that ‘embarrass’ you? This is so mean, but my mom makes the cringiest jokes and such imo that gives me mad secondhand embarrassment. Do you like any Bon Jovi songs? Yeah, a decent handful. Who was the last person you were in a car with? Mom. Do you give people second chances? Ha, more than "second." How’re things between you and your most recent ex? We're totally great. Really as if we didn't even break up, considering I mean... nothing emotionally has changed. We just know that being together right now isn't the wise decision. It's frustrating as hell, though. We've already established we're not going to "wait" for each other, but neither of us are actively looking for a new partner, either. I want her, and from what I can tell, she wants me, too. We kinda just... don't talk about how unfair it all is anymore because we both get too upset. I was even supposed to go up there with her and her fam for her birthday and Christmas, but that's changed because she and I agree it's too soon after splitting, making it only more difficult to be around each other. We'd want to cuddle and kiss and such by instinct, so we're trying to wait until the wound isn't as fresh. Though honestly, I don't know how visiting period would go consider as said, there has been zero change in romantic attraction. Ugh yeah I just hope she figures out what she wants and all and we can get back together. Have you been to a wedding this year? No. I'm going to my half-sister's next year, though. Are you an aunt or uncle? Yes, and another niece is on her way. :') Do you expect to be married in the next two years? Probably not. What season is your birthday in? Winter. Have you ever been hunting? Fuck that shit. How often do you walk around barefoot? Always in my own house + in other houses if I'm allowed to take my shoes off. When you eat take-out, do you just eat it out of the containers provided? Usually, but it does depend on what food it is. Ex., those little boxes that have rice in them from Chinese places? I'm using a bowl. From the container is just messy. Would you need to sleep with someone before considering marrying them? Nah. Do you carry condoms? No. Would you date someone who has a hearing aid? ... Yes...? "No" is just... so rude?? Like that is something the person absolutely cannot help, nor is it a HUGE thing. It's just a hearing aid, dude. How organized are the files on your computer? Pretty decent. Folders and such. Could be better still, probably. Have you ever been to a strip club? Nah, not my scene. Have you ever brought home a stray animal? Pleeeeenty of cats. Are you physically strong? No, especially not my legs. I've got a newborn fawn's legs, jc. Still working on building the muscle back up. Would you date someone with braces? Oh my god, fuck off. Yes I would. I was the person with braces dating someone without them, so 1.) I obviously can't say shit, 2.) they're taking care of their goddamn teeth, and 3.) I dunno, wearing braces has no goddamn impact on personality???????????? Does scuba diving interest you? Not to an incredible degree, but it'd be cool. Would you ever ask your parents for relationship advice? Maybe for certain topics. Do you think people look up to you? Y'know that "oh no hunty WHAT is u doin" meme??? That's me if someone does. How often do you have trouble sleeping at night? *blinking* There are people who don't??????? Do you blush easily? Ohhhhhh yes. Do you get angry at yourself or at others more often? Hm. Not sure. Can you name five current world leaders? AHAHA nope. How many times have you had the flu? Zero. Do you think imagination is valuable? Oh hell yes. We would be NOWHERE CLOSE to where we are as animals without it. Who or what are you most impatient with? I don't know. When was the last time you mowed a lawn? Never. Have you seen all of the Star Wars films? No; seen only the first three with a friend and saw zero appeal. He didn't either. How about all of the Harry Potter ones, so far? I haven't even seen one. Jason and I started the first one together but. Paid way more attention to each other than the movie lmfao. What part of the newspaper do you typically enjoy reading? None. I collect my school's papers now though 'cuz I'm the photographer for it. :') Have you ever made a website, even a simple one? Four that I remember. The ancient and now-defunct ones were back when I think this site called Wetpaint was a host for simple sites, and a lot of us RPers posted our mob info and stuff there. I had one for Talons, one for Connrads. Ha, out of curiosity, I think I looked for them not all too long ago since I never actually deleted them, but I think the site itself was re-purposed. NOW, I have a Wix site for my photography, and then Kalahari Manor is a ProBoards-hosted site. Which was better: your childhood or your teen years? Jfc, childhood. Teen years were a chaotic and rancid cesspit in terms of mental health. What was your reaction to your first time falling in love? I truly imagine that realizing I was *in love* with Jason surpassed what a high probably feels like lmao. What does it take for someone to win your heart? I'm actually putting thought into this one and I think what appeals to me in a person most is just being friendly with a good sense of humor and obvious, shameless concern for others. AND JFC, HAVE EMOTION. Don't be a brick wall with me. Lacking an emotional side, positive or negative, is such a turn-off to me. I'm not attracted to robots. Being a gentle person is important, and for me personally, you need to actually act like you're into me. Not just between us. Do not make me a secret. AND BE CREATIVE AND WEIRD AND FRESH!!!!!!!!!!! There's nothing wrong with more "vanilla" people, but just for me myself, I need someone who stands out for some good reason. lol okay this answer's actually getting kinda long, I'll stop. There's a number of ways. What is one thing you would rather be doing? Ha ha yo real talk, Sara and I are getting all emotional and deep into our relationship, platonic or romantic, and I want me and her in her bed right now tearing each other up alsdkjfla;kwejre I love her a lot ok. When was the last time you changed your mind about something? OKAY SO I started a new birth control, right? It. Sent. Me. BACK. With my PTSD. How? Idfk, but I was suddenly obsessing over Him again, badly. I stopped that shit, and wha'd'ya know, two days later, I'm like "lol wtf I don't want him why did that just happen hunty was u ok????????". SO YEAH, that was a trip. Do you know anyone with a lisp? I'm not sure. Possibly. How much weight can you lift at once? No clue. Not a lot. Do you ask guys out, or wait for them to ask you out? I've never asked a guy out, but I wouldn't say I wouldn't. Do you like the last person who showed interest in you? I love her. Describe the last person you stared at? I have no idea. Do you like dating one person at a time, or multiple people? I'm personally monogamous. Have your experiences made you more or less sympathetic to others? MORE. Do you find smoking unattractive? I do. Have your parents ever searched your personal belongings? Mom has. Where did you get your last bruise from? ... Well. This is uh. Awkward. Tying into when I was on that medicine that made my libido fucking uncontrollable (thank the fucking lord I'm back to normal), my breasts are lookin rough, sister. Are you looking forward to anything? Nothing in the VERY near future, I think. A bit further off, Christmas. I can't wait to see the kids so excited again, and for once, we come together as a true family. Plus my #1 wish is to have my Mark tattoo improved at an amazing parlor, and I'm pretty sure that'll be happening, just obvs. not on Christmas Day itself. I'll just be fuckin STOKED when I *know* it's happening. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Yes. How much money did you spend today? $1.25 for something from the vending machine. I didn't have breakfast, so I was really hungry. When you’re bored in class, what do you usually do? Try to not doze off. If we're not doing anything, then I'll play around with my phone. Have you ever had a song stuck in your head for more than a day? Oh, definitely. Ever walked into the guy’s bathroom? HA as a stupid elementary school with her friends, we sure did during a work day (my mom used to work with special ed kids at school). We thought we were soooo rebellious. How many wives or husbands do you want? One. What happens if you fall in love with your best friend? Ha, did. I still am, and we hope to be back together someday. Has a teacher ever flirted with you? Not that I know of. Thankfully. Is it okay for friends to kiss each other, as friends? It's not my thing, but sure, if it's consenting and both are aware it's platonic. Do your wishes ever get granted in the worst way possible? Probably in some way at some point I don't recall. How do you feel about your naked body? NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO Have you ever been called obnoxious? I don't think so, anyway. Do you wish you had a bigger family? No. Which friend would you kiss full on the mouth, no questions asked? Sara. Can you do a split or stick your foot up next to your ear? Nope. When was the last time you complained about something? I was venting some mild frustration to Sara earlier tonight. What is your favorite color combination? Favorite is probably pastel orange and light blue. Love it. Then there's pastel pink and purple. Okay pretty much any combination is about the pastels When was the last time you spoke in front of a group? A month or so back when I had to do my Lifeline presentation in FYS. Do you like group projects, or do you prefer to work alone? I strongly prefer working alone. There's no disagreements, compromises, incompetent partners, etc. Have you ever been told you were going to Hell? Yup! (: Indirectly, but. How did you respond? I don't recall, but I wish I did. Who is the most argumentative person you know? She's not in my life anymore partially BECAUSE of that shit. Do you know anyone who is crazy about proper grammar? Yes, but she has OCD as a valid reason. I'm pretty particular about it too to a degree. Who was the last person to make you feel special? Oh my gosh, my therapist told me she was so proud of me and the progress I was making that I just entirely lit up and became a total beaming ball of giggles and "thank you"s. Would you feel funny if you kissed somebody of the same sex? No, I'm bi. If your best friend grabs your hand, what do you automatically do? Squeeze it. What’s something you can cook or bake like a pro? Cheesy and spicy scrambled eggs, man. Also known as the only thing I can properly cook lmao. Do you tend to flirt a lot, even when the person isn’t single? Fuck no, if they're not single. I'll flirt with my s/o when I see it appropriate or relevant, and in a case where we're both single, I'd be very subtle about it because shy. What’s something that you think is really cute? Off the very top of my head, the Ewoks from Star Wars, oh my fucking god. They were the only thing I enjoyed in the movies. What’s a pretty bird? I mean... pretty much all of them. BUT, can we take a moment to appreciate the bearded vulture? like???? they're fucking BADASS???????????? Besides sleeping, what do you do in bed? Almost... everything. It's the reason I endured/am still recovering from muscle atrophy in my legs. Have you ever hacked into somebody’s account? Playfully, back when that was a thing for friends to do and post lovey-dovey stuff about them everywhere. Megan and I, and I believe Mini and I as well, did it to each other. Possibly more. Is having to pee really badly worse than being really thirsty? Oh hell yes it is. The former can get to a point of hurting. Have you ever touched a Qu'ran? No. Do you love animals more than most? Oh definitely. Why do you eat fast food? It's easy to grab when on the run, and Mom has almost zero time to cook. Then we both have school. Most often I just warm things up in the microwave or grab something substantial enough in the fridge. Is there always going to be that one person you and a friend makes fun of? I guess you could say indirectly, yes. Just something she said in a certain way became an inside joke. Her as a person, no, I wouldn't do that. What is a bad habit of yours that you’re actually trying to fix? Having terrible eye contact. I have a very hard time maintaining it, but I've been trying to keep that weakness in mind when talking to people. Do you write out your feelings? That's one reason why I take these surveys, yes. Do you have bills to pay yet? It's embarrassing that I don't. Not saying like, I want to pay bills, what madman would, but I do want to feel more like a proper, independent adult. Will you be changing your hair any time soon? Not the style, but one thing I'm asking for Christmas is a professional to dye my hair silver. I say pro because my hair does NOT hold color, and because of the bleach needed, Mom's concerned I'll damage my hair if I put my trust into anyone less qualified. Does your mom have a celebrity look-alike? I don't think so, but she looks UNCANNILY like her firstborn daughter. It is SCARY. Is there something you wish you could learn to do? There's loads of stuff. Probably above all, cook. Or stop procrastinating. If you could be amazing at ONE thing, what would it be? Drawing precisely what I see in my head. Because of how important they are to me, I would pay BIG FUCKING BUCKS to get how my 'kats look onto paper. What do you wish people would pay you to do? Complain about my weight. :^) I'd be able to just pay for surgery to fix that within a day. Do you take good pictures? I personally think I do. I mean I wanna be a professional photographer. How would one go about impressing you? It depends on the subject and difficulty of whatever. What probably impresses me most would be someone maintaining a mature, peaceful attitude when there is reason to act otherwise. Self-control, that's it. Do you automatically apologize if you walk into somebody? Duh? Tell me a memory of this summer: It was fucking scorching and I hated every minute of it. What’s something that you don’t need, but really want? Hmmmm. OH, HELL YES. IF I had the proper body to even remotely pull them off, I. Would wear. NOTHING. But corsets. Jesus FUCKING Christ they are so hot. What do you draw more than anything else? Just about all I draw is meerkats. What’s the most favorite class you’ve ever had? The Digital Photography course I took in high school. Or Art Honors my junior year. I really enjoyed the stuff I made. For each person you’ve kissed, describe your feelings in one word: Jason: melancholy; Tyler: dramatic; Girt(?): loyal; Sara: ideal. How do you react when you trip or stumble? Gasp and carry on. If it was a more serious trip, I look around at who saw. Are you good at “biting your tongue”? NO. Why do you love the one you do? She's been there for me without fail, has undying faith in me, supports me through everything, is honest, she's funny and very unique, her adoration for animals shows a great level of compassion, she trusts me so much despite her history, she stands extremely firmly for what she sees as right and wrong... okay I can honestly write an essay on why I love her. Would you rather get [another] tattoo or piercing? GIMME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 THE TATTOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111111 Do you have long or short legs? I'd say they're normal, idk. When do you listen to Nickelback? *shrugs* When I wanna? Would you rather make the first move, or your crush? Them. I'm shy.

[curly-q-reviews]

VALENTINES DAY SPECIAL

Below Her Mouth, 2016 (dir. April Mullen)

WARNING SPOILERS AND LOTS OF SEX TALK AHEAD TREAD WITH CAUTION

HEY Y’ALL we interrupt the regular programming for a special feature!!  i always like to do a lil valentines day special viewing for the sake of being festive and for once ive actually gotten some dating action in my life so i was in the mood to watch some sweet romance and then review it for ur reading pleasure (emphasis on the PLEASURE ehugeguehgehgeugeghe) (assassinate me now i deserve it)

to preface this, i am VERY gay.  well uuhhh bi but a very GAY bi u know??  basically i curse my attraction to men every waking moment of my life.  ive known about this since my last few years of college and am out to basically everyone whos important, and a lot of my friends are lgbtq+ so u know its official and everything.  i dont really claim to be a Gay Expert  cause i actually am still lacking a lot of uuhhh physical experience if u catch my drift HOWEVER like a true scholar i have done my fair share of research.  which mainly includes watching really shitty lesbian movies and mocking them (and every so often watching a rare Good Lesbian Movie and crying A LOT). 

if u are of sapphic inclination as well then u probably already know the kind of reputation lesbian romance movies have overall, the prime examples of which would be movies like Room in Rome and Loving Annabelle.  these movies all seem to have one thing in common, and its that the directors and writers have no goddamn clue about how to write a convincing and authentic lesbian romance.  u also always get the sense that the male gaze is the one being prioritized cause theres always PLENTY of gratuitous sex and the romance part itself is uuhhhh never really developed well or thoroughly enough at all.  these movies are usually about a straight girl who discovers her affinity for the feminine when she meets a total stranger and suddenly cant stop thinking about how much she wants to bang her.  and then in-between all the banging they somehow find the time to fall madly in love with each other but the straight girl just CANT cause shes STRAIGHT or she has a FIANCE or her PARENTS wouldnt approve or whatever the fuck the conflict of the day is and either it ends with them never seeing each other again or with the straight girl coming to terms with her not-straightness and ***follow her heart*** or whatever

really the only lesbian movies i can recall actually enjoying would be Pariah (PLEASE check this movie out its so heart-wrenching and beautiful and its like a majority-black cast!!!) and Blue Is the Warmest Color (this one i loved at first but the more i reflect on it the more problems i find with it, ESPECIALLY with how much sex is in it).  and then The L Word is a stellar tv series up until like the last few seasons which are trash but otherwise it was a great watch for me, especially while i was still figuring things out.  i feel like there are more that ive seen that were pretty good but i cant think of them at the moment WHOOPS LOL

so with Below Her Mouth i was apprehensive but hopeful going in, although i had heard rumors that it was Real Bad.  and u know i shouldve listened to those rumors and not bothered with this movie cause WOW its bad!!!  script is TRASH, acting is TRASH WITH FEBREEZE SPRAYED ON IT, and it looks like an artsy pretentious film student shot it.  natalie krill had maybe one good acting moment in the whole 90-minute run time and erika linder is really really hot and those are the only two good things i can think to say about this

fuck ok uuhhh i guess ill talk about the main characters cause OH WOW theyre basically two walking talking cliches.  jasmine (yes her name is jasmine that totally doesnt sound like the name of a character in a porn at all) is our Token Straight Girl who has a fiance and is a fashion editor.  she first sees our other romantic lead while working on the roof of a house next door to hers.  shes ur typical Lesbian Romance Movie Butch, too cool for school and unable to commit to anyone ever and is kind of an asshole but somehow this is supposed to endear u to her.  oh and guess what her name is.  just guess.  ill give u a few minutes.

DALLAS ITS FUCKING DALLAS HOOWEE WHAT A SHOCKER

the first thing we see of dallas, and this is also the first fuckin shot of the movie, is her uuhhh scissoring her girlfriend???  humping her?????  i really dont know what shes trying to accomplish but shes clearly not having any fun while doing it and her girlfriends like “i love u” and shes like “im moving out bye” and thats it

real compelling i know

so jasmine and her bff manage to stumble upon the lesbian bar in town (which dallas calls a girl party???  why??????) where dallas meets her and proceeds to be completely and utterly creepy in ways ive only ever seen men be which is the first indicator that the person who made this movie, april mullen, is maybe not gay at all (or maybe she is and just has horrible taste?? idk man).  but somehow the creepiness is a real turn on for ol’ jazzy and they start making out IMMEDIATELY but then jasmines like “i have a fiance gotta go!!!!” and yeets herself out of the situation

but of course this is a lesbian romance so u know they meet up again and proceed to have like half an hours worth of steamy gratuitous porn-style sex.  there was a lot of strap-on action involved and a lot of bizarre scissoring that i dont even think i can call scissoring cause it was more like they were just weirdly bumping their vagoos against each other and somehow that was getting them both off.  like sometimes the sex scenes in this movie bordered on tommy wiseau levels of weird. 

oh and of course the fiance finds out about this secret love affair but WOW do they really do this in the most dramatic and unintentionally hilarious way possible.  he literally comes home early from his business trip and walks in on dallas going to town on jasmine with a strap on in the bath tub, like theyre ferociously going at it.  i swear to god i felt like i was watching a comedy at times with this movie

piggybacking off of that, jesus christ this script is bad.  ooooohhhh its so bad.  dallas is given the cringiest tough guy lines, like shes drinking beers with a friend and the friend is like “oh man i gotta catch up to u” and, hilariously, dallas is like “you cant catch up cause nO oNe WiLl EvEr CaTcH mE” and i almost choked on my own saliva.  oh god wait heres another zinger, so when she first meets jasmine shes like “do u come to girl parties often (again why the everloving FUCK is she calling it a girl party????)” and jasmines like “i don’t come at all” and the next thing to come out of dallas’s suave sexy mouth is “TeRriBLe NeWs CaN i ChAnGe ThAt FoR yOu” OH my GOD

and good god shes so creepy.  like some of the shit she pulls is borderline sexual assault.  her and jasmine are just at a bar chillin and dallas reaches down and im like “oh ok shes gonna like put her hand on her knee classic move” but NOPE OH NO she just makes a beeline STRAIGHT for jasmines crotch IN THE MIDDLE OF A BAR!!!  THERE ARE PEOPLE AROUND!!!!!!  OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

at one point after another round of passionate lovemaking dallas brings jasmine back to her house and theyre in dallas’s truck and they just??  slap each other???  for no reason?????  except for True Love i guess????????????

jesus.  just.  this was an experience.  i would say dont bother watching it but i did at least have fun making fun of it so if thats ur sort of thing knock ur socks off, its on netflix.  but wow this basically fits the stereotype of a lesbian romance movie PERFECTLY, and when u really break it down its just a fancy porn.  i wouldnt even say its a porn geared towards actual wlw cause theres so many elements about the sex scenes that reminded me of the kind of lesbian porn thats made for straight men to jack off to.  0/10 BAD BYE

well shit ok i hope u all had a great valentines day!!  im gonna go start a roofing business in the hopes that i end up working on a roof of a house thats right next to a really hot straight girl with a fiance so i can try to finger-bang her in the middle of an occupied bar wish me luck!!!!!

[resconarchive]

prinxess's rescreatu rant

Hey all (+Riyo), it's prinxess. I found this blog today, which naturally means I spent the next 5 hours flipping through the archive lol. This was supposed to be a short post but plans never go as expected (Warning: this is LONG). If you know me, you’ve probably seen me try to talk about this stuff in the SB—which rarely goes well, haha. I’m going to word vomit on three main things: Res’s “first come, first serve” issue, Staff/ShoutBox Culture, and my own mistakes.

This isn’t Voice of God. I’m just a flawed 20-year-old who feels compelled articulate her thoughts at least once somewhere.

I accept responsibility for what’s written below.

1. Early Birds Get the Worm

Nice names are Res’s lifeblood. The aim of the game is to accumulate as many as you can. It didn't start out that way but that’s what it's become; it's human nature to want what your peers want. We enjoy having valuable things—the proof is in the pixels. But LOL good names are now worth 1B tu? This is why people are so upset with the site. If you made an account in 2006, quickly hatched three creatu named Diamond, Emerald, and Sapphire, and didn't log in again until now, your account would be worth more than someone who joined a year ago but has put in hundreds of hours into the site.

1B is pretty abstract, so I'll offer a cold splash of in-game reality. 700M = $100

Many of Rescreatu’s issues writhe around one malignant crux: its “first come, first serve” groundwork. Meaning, if your account isn’t old enough to be sent off to grade school, then you are out of luck. With everything. If you weren’t there when you could fish tier-1 names from the Atquateen Forest, if you weren’t there during the mass graveyard purges, if you weren’t smart enough to buy valuable names en masse for cheap from naive tweens 8 years ago, you’re out of luck. Unless Mr. Moneybags disembowels him/herself into your hands, you will never measure up to the sheer wealth of a select few old users (Gunmetal, Fleur, etc).

The visible wealth disparity is unreal. It’s kind of cute—there’s this ritual where when a newbie appears in the SB, older users flood them with tu and lovely creatu because they know baby bambi can’t make it on their own in modern Res. But what about the invisible users? The 99% who never set foot in the SB? Imagine you’re twelve, creating an account for the first time. You’re given XYZtu (aka not enough) to start off with. Hatching pets is fun. You like finding clothes for your avatar in the trash. A while later, you become interested in buying more creatu, so you fiddle around with the Creatu Search. And... you realize that the only good rwns are in the 20M+ range.

Actually no—a few weeks ago, a user called prinxess went through the entire directory, cleaned out most lower-priced RWNs, and stuck them in her shop at mark-up. But hey, she left “Blisters” and “Introspective” for you.

There’s nothing to do on Rescreatu except lord your cool names over other users. Nothing else... except... wait. Isn’t the Kir Quest about colors, not names? Which brings me to my next point. Years ago, blondes were worth 700k, and albinos 3M. Players back then threw these cheap creatu at Kir and rode the Uldavian Express to higher Rounds at mach speed (there are 5 Rounds now. each need an additional 120 creatu/points to access). Nowadays, albinos are no longer stocked in ranchers—period. I’m talking chimbies and meragons, not even seasonals. To use myself as an example, I restarted Kir a month ago (I was only at 25 points, Round 1). I’ll be the first to admit I wasn’t being 100% efficient with my tu, but within a few days, I managed to add an additional 23 creatu to that number. At the cost of nearly one billion tu. 95% of which went towards beans.

If you’re a newbie with a dream of earning a Cyancu Nest, you need to give Kir 180 creatu total. That isn’t just hard—it’s straight-up impossible. From a cost/benefit standpoint, if you do not already have a substantial amount of Kir points, do not touch the Quest. Instead, buy the prize shop items from other users.

Because, let’s do some math. 180 (creatu) x 7,800,000 (price per bean) = 1,404,000,000tu.

I swear on every god out there that, overall, you will not just be spending 7.8M per creatu.

Cyancu eggs are selling for 500M each/1.5B for a nest, pretty close to that mythical 1,404,000,000 number. Just buy the egg.

A staff member once told me, “The Kir Quest is supposed to be hard.” Fair enough. The original purpose of the Quest was to fix Res’s overpopulation problem. Make higher colors valuable again. But now we’ve swung hard towards creatu extinction. The fix is relatively simple. Have Kir ask for blondes/albinos less often. Or increase the likelihood of hatching colors. Should be a simple coding tweak.

Side-note: With beans having become an integral part of Rescreatu’s ONLY real continuous Quest, why are they still cash shop items? People love to tout “but the site needs money to run”. How about put out a better product instead of squeezing users with Stockholm Syndrome/a gambling addiction out of more pennies? Actually, not pennies, it’s serious cash. The next promo is $100 for 3 retired CS eggs—a promo which was supposed to be in December, but moved because the higher ups thought users would be too strapped for cash during Christmas.

2. Staff/Culture

Hopelessness makes the newer users leave. Staff corruption poisons the rest. I’m not involved in current Rescreatu politics, but in the past it absolutely was a thing. Even with generally loved and respected staff members.

 I don’t want to disclose too much information, but since I’m old and weary, I’ll say that (without asking for it) a substantial boon was thrown my way because I was friendly with a member of staff. They are still highly regarded within the community.

14BM was unabashedly shady. One day, I announced I was selling a name on the SB and got in touch with a buyer. During our back-and-forth rmailing, 14BM rmailed me to say one of us had “accidentally hit the report button” which pointed her to our conversation. She warned me the other user was ripping me off, and that she could give me a better offer. Not very professional behavior, in my honest opinion.

Way back when, BillyBob was abusing glitches.

A name appeared in anon-staff’s Showroom one hot second after the person it belonged to was banned for “using a bot to find eggs.” Anon-staff had previously asked if they’d ever sell the name and they had said no. Shady.

Real talk. A staff member told me they don’t even care if you use bots, just as long as you don’t find enough seasonal eggs to ruin the market. I think anything above 40 is considered suspicious. Nevermind if you actually have no life and want to search for eggs for 48 hours straight.

There were way more corruption incidents, but those were so long ago I barely remember them. As for current staff, I can’t speak for them. Honestly, I can’t tell who most people are anymore because of all the username switching lol. There’s this ridiculous implicit rule of “don’t ask what someone’s username used to be” around Res. Like hello? That makes no sense. Not only do they retain their unique pets, but really, if someone hated you, a simple change of username isn’t going to make them suddenly forget who you are. Similarly, the whole idea of a new username being “a new start” for the user is frankly hilarious. Especially when you act no different.

That’s unfortunately just the start of my issue with Res’s “nice” culture. I’ll call it by another name: suck-up culture. It’s this omnipresent force of saccharine sweetness that’s nearly alive from how many people are hooked up into it. Plenty of users are genuinely nice, I won’t knock that. But damn, when a staff member/older user/wealthbag comes on the SB? It’s a vicious competition to prove how close they are are with that member. Immediately, there are “glomps” and “huggles” and “we’re married!/best friends” as if they actually give a shit about the other person. You do not. I know you do not. Everyone knows you do not. You’re just trying to get free things—and hey, it’s not a bad move, since those users are generally the gifting type. Oh. The cringiest thing is when a fan gives a popular user a cheap present, so the popular user will feel obliged to give them something in return—hopefully a better something. Machiavelli must be rolling in his grave.

This sugary behavior has somehow infected staff as well. I find it doubly disgusting because I can’t even call them out on it.

“<3 oh sweetheart, just so you know, what you’re doing is called spam. [link to rules] please take a look!! :333 ^_^”

“ *pops in* haiiiii guys, sorry to bump in but could you please take this convo to rmail? :3 *hugs* squeeeee <333 *hopes you dont hate me* ”

Like, fucking Christ. I can feel their phantom arms around me in my sleep. Can anyone speak normally anymore? Does everything need to be qualified with butterflies, sunshine, and overtures of love?

Back to the subject of staff... that issue is multifaceted. First, it’s a weirdly cyclical thing. Notice how newly chosen staff are almost always friends with current staff? I don’t believe I’ve ever seen some anon that’s never visited the SB become staff purely on merit (save for artists/programmers). But I could be wrong. Anyway, users inducted into staff are usually already one of Res’s wealthy elite. I can only speak for the trend I’ve noticed over the years, but A LOT of people become staff as a status symbol. Some also do it because they’re invested in the site and want to make it better. The two aren’t mutually exclusive. You can want to help while liking the boost in popularity at the same time. The real issue with staff is how they are compensated. Getting paid in credits (cash points?) actively increases the wealth disparity in the site. There’s a difference between giving someone 100 dollars versus a handful of credits. If someone handed you a hundred dollars, would you use it for rent or on some virtual name tags? Without this choice, staff are essentially forced into one course of action: buy credit shop items, put these items in their merchant shop, sell them to users, rake in tu. Or just sell cp for tu.

Rescreatu doesn’t use their staff properly. I’m referring to writers and artists. There are hundreds of wearable items available, but dressing up an avatar to look forum-fancy isn’t the purpose of a pet site. It’s a nice feature. But I didn’t join Rescreatu so I could play dress-up, I joined for the pets, for the battle arena, for the story of it all. Writers, I feel, are the most wasted of all. Does anyone actually read the stories in the books? Does anyone buy books, even? Res should take their talent and invest in proper story lines. They have six writers right now. Come on. Put up a good kidnapping site-wide story involving Xoria and Loyna. Get a competition between Scria users and Reiflem users going. Maybe the story could be Quest-style, with the users voting on how the story moves with their tu. Do something!

...Because this site also needs a tu sink. Desperately. Contrary to popular belief, the Kir Quest isn’t a tu sink, it vacuums money up to the top dogs of Rescreatu. You buy 10 beans—where are you getting these beans? More than likely, it’s from a staff member selling 70 of them in their shop. IRL right now there are 4 users selling beans: Feather x34, Isolation x30, Umbreon420 x1, Phos x36. Nothing against these users—in fact, I like them, but do you notice a trend? What do staff do with all this tu? They buy names at premium prices because they can afford to.

Q: Wait, prinx. If you just paid real money, you could have lots of tu too! A: My honor code forbids me from validating freemium games

Q: But, prinx. Why don’t you just become staff?  A: I tried when I was 13 but they didn’t accept me ): Probably for good reason.

It’s shocking that the stock market hasn’t been removed/tweaked yet. It shouldn’t be possible to buy 50,000 stocks of FAS for 400k on Sunday, and sell that for 20M one week later. This is another reason why names are considered the real currency on Rescreatu. Their value increases along with the inflation. It’s the only safe investment you can make.

3. Me

So, my long-winded rant is out of the way. Above, I mentioned I’d like to apologize for myself, so here I go. For context, these past few months I’ve been trying to get rid of my RWNs through forum auctions. In the latest thread, I stuck in an umbrella clause basically saying that I reserved the right to pull whatever bullshit I wanted, which I used, without warning, to tack 1.2B Autobuy options to the names. Half my reason was I was being egged on by a friend to do it. Half was because I just didn’t care. Never in my wildest dreams did I even imagine one person would actually go for it, let alone 3. When I opened the thread the morning after, I felt dread. My actions understandably upset quite a few people. I acknowledge that what I did was unprofessional. I regret it, and I’ve learned a valuable lesson.

In general, I’ve spent my recent years on Rescreatu being rude and abrasive. Trying to tie 14 year old staff in logic knots, picking at overly sensitive members, engaging trolls, the works. I’ve been throwing angsty melodrama around like glow-sticks at an EDM concert, and it isn’t fair to the newer members who have no memory of Res’s past.

This post clocks in at 2.5k words. The only reason I’ve written so much is because Rescreatu means/meant so much to me. For all its faults, Res somehow just works. Maybe because it encourages addictive behavior. Maybe because of the community. Whatever it is, it’s helped the site escape multiple waves of peril that would’ve killed any other. For that it deserves some applause. 

If you want to contact me, rmail me or email me at blu.moon.dragon@gmail.com. I don't bite

Peace.

[mangon3cta]

FWU (NCT Part 2)

Genre: idolverse, angsty sorta, smuttish

Word count: 2.7K

also, i do make some of the nct members look mean and rude in this but like its just fiction so....

You had a breakout in the morning. You sighed, not wanting to get up and face the boys after what Mark told you last night. This day is not gonna get any better, you thought, climbing out of bed and observing the bumps on your forehead. It was better not to cover it up like you usually did, you just didn’t find it so important right now. 

Whipping your hair into a messy top bun, you didn’t even bother changing out of your pajamas before entering the dining room. To your horror, the members were already up and dining, and they all turned to look at you as you stepped in. 

You attempted to look somewhere else but it was impossible for you to avoid contact since there were so many pairs of eyes piercing into yours. The only thought you had was to pretend you didn’t know a single thing. But that backfired on you as well. 

“Can I sit here?” You asked Johnny with fake cheerfulness. Without looking, he  nodded and you sat down beside him. “Its really hot today, right?” No one replied and you reached over the table to grab a piece of toast. Thankfully the younger boys weren’t around. 

“The dream babies must be working so hard!” You exclaimed while buttering you toast. You tried to act normal, but on the inside you were close to having a panic attack. “I hope it really pays off, Jeno was so excited for this comeback. Promotions should end soon, right, so hopefully they get some rest.”

“You talk a lot,” Taeil suddenly said. It was like the room had unanimously stopped breathing. You glanced at Taeil who was sitting a couple chairs across from you. You felt alone here since Mark was away with the rest of Dream.

“Yeah...I know,” You laughed softly. “I guess I’m-”

“And why do you call them dream babies, you know, they aren’t babies and thats the cringiest thing I’ve ever heard.” 

You felt your heart drop. You always called them babies, why was it such a problem now. Oh, right. You looked around the table, making contact for seconds with each member. 

“I’m sorry you don’t like it,” you said quietly. “I thought it was cute.”

“Just cut the crap, Y/N,” Ten spoke up. “You don’t have to act like that, we already know everything.” You aren’t the type to take shit from anyone and that was one of your best and worst qualities. 

“You already said that,” you replied sharply. “I’m not brain dead, I knew what you meant.” 

“Are you seriously going to start with me right now? You’re going to act like that?”

You scoffed. “What do you want me to say? I’m not just going to...” You faltered, suddenly aware of they eyes on you again. You stood up. “I’m sorry. I guess you all hate me then?” You caught Sicheng’s gaze for a moment and nearly burst into tears. 

“I  never meant to hurt anyone, I was just having fun. It’s just who I am. I’m sorry. I’m sorry to all of you. But if it makes you guys feel any better, I already told my dad I wanted to move out. So I’ll be doing that.” You flipped around and ran to your room. It was actually the manager’s - your dad’s - room but he pretty much gave it to you. 

Your bags were already packed and everything. You just had to wait for your driver. It wasn’t easy sitting alone in your room when your routine usually started and ended by hanging out with the NCT members. 

There was a knock on the door and Mark stepped inside. Seeing him comforted you a little and you managed a small smile. “I heard what happened this morning.”

You looked down at your lap. “There’s no way I can live under the same roof as you guys anymore. I totally humiliated myself and it’s all my fault. I’m sure they don’t want me here either.”

Mark stat quiet for a while and then spoke softly. “They don’t hate you, Y/N. They just didn’t like what you did.” You didn’t reply, unsure of what to say. You didn’t want to defend yourself because that would just be an excuse and what you did could never be justified. 

“You know, you are one of our closest friends...you’ve been with most of us since before debut and helped us through a lot of things.”

You laughed to yourself, thinking of the days when you helped Yuta and Sicheng study Korean, and the time when Johnny taught you some dance moves and you broke your wrist in the process. 

“Y/N, Ten hyung really likes you, he likes you.”

You scoffed. “That doesn’t really make me feel better. It makes things worse actually.”

“Well,” Mark said, picking at a thread on his jeans. “I would be really mad too if I was in love with you and went and screwed around with other people after...you know.” He blushed and you smiled slightly. Mark held your gaze. “All I’m saying is that...maybe a simple apology will do.”

“How am I supposed to apologize to any of them, they all hate me!”

Mark shrugged. “Like I said, they don’t hate you. They’re all ready to forgive you. Just don’t leave.” You gave in. Mark was right. You should at least give it a shot. 

You talked things over with your father and told him you had a change of mind. He was pretty annoyed but he couldn’t deny you. The first person you decided to apologize to was Ten. It didn’t take long for him to forgive you. 

“I just thought it was only me,” he said, laughing softly. “But I forgive you.”

“I’ll change,” you told him, smiling. Ten stepped closer.

“It’s just that...I’ve always really liked you.” He didn’t continue. Instead, his fingers cupped your chin, pulling you into a kiss. You gasped against his mouth. This was unexpected. But you didn’t want to be rude. You kissed him back with the same vigor.

After that, it wasn’t hard to apologize to the other boys. Taeil was nice(er than usual), Taeyong almost ignored but you did aegyo to make him pay attention and Jaehyun was quick to forgive you. 

By the next week, it was almost as if nothing ever happened. And you were grateful for that. But you couldn’t forget. Not while you were now with Ten, but you still catered feelings for Sicheng. 

"Jagi!” Ten barged into your room after dance practice while you were seated on the couch, texting an old friend. He wrapped his arms around you, snuggling his face in your neck. “Mark said he was gonna bring me bread sticks to eat.”

“What’s up, baby?” You asked, kissing his head and then drawing your attention back to your phone. 

“Who’re you texting?”

“A high school friend. We haven’t talked in ages.” You let out a giggle as Ten nibbled on your ear lobe. 

“Ask her who her NCT bias is.”

You laughed and did as you were told. “Who wants to know?” With a wink emoji was her reply. You closed your phone and set aside. Someone really needed your attention. Ten was like this at times. And it was really cute, but also a tad bit annoying. You didn’t mind. 

“Looks like your day didn’t go so well,” you whispered against his hair. Ten just hummed into the crook of your neck. He was practically laying over you on the couch. 

“I just missed you today.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, twirling your fingers into his soft brown hair. “Well, I’m here now.” Ten shifted a little, getting into a more comfortable - and intimate - position. 

His lips were trailing kissed down your neck and across your shoulder, biting into your skin ever so softly. Eventually, his hand had made its way in your jeans, his fingers playing at the hem of your panties. 

Butterflies erupted in the pit of your stomach while you knew it was wrong, but you couldn’t help yourself. A part of you wanted to stop him while the other went, oh what the hell, why not indulge him? 

You moved your hips slightly so that Ten’s hand was just ghosting over your center and just as a soft moan left your lips, the door opened and you were brought back to your senses.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” Mark exclaimed almost dropping the plate he was holding in the process. Ten was startled as he quickly pulled his hand away from you and you sat upright, hoping Mark didn’t see all that.

“It’s okay,” you said, purposefully enunciating your voice. “We weren’t really doing anything, you can come in.” Mark stepped inside, his face red with embarrassment. 

“Hyung, you wanted these so I just came to give them,” he said, handing the plate of bread sticks to Ten. “I’m really sorry, I should’ve knocked, I just wasn’t thinking -”

“Mark, calm down,” Ten laughed upon seeing how flustered he was. “It’s fine.” Mark just gave you two an awkward smile before leaving the room. Ten turned to you. “He’s such a cute kid.”

You giggled. “Anyway, don’t you have something to do?”

“Nope,” Ten grinned, his lips hovering over yours once again. “I’m free for the rest of the day.”

You had never been to any of NCT’s MV shoots before so this was a first experience for you. Ten wasn’t around since he wouldn’t be part of this comeback. Despite how many times they had to repeat the choreography, it seemed really fun. Donghyuk seemed to be having the most fun; fooling around with the other members and pretty much causing a ruckus. 

The director summoned everyone over to the computer to check how the scene turned out. Sicheng stood behind you as you enjoyed how great the first part of the video looked. You felt him rest his head on your shoulder. This wasn’t new since you were close with almost all the members, they’ve all done it before; mostly Jisung and Donghyuck though. 

But this time it felt different. Sicheng’s braids tickled your neck and you surprised yourself by turning your head and connecting your lips. You realized what you had a second too late and Sicheng had already stepped away, looking around to see if anyone had seen. 

You went red, cursing yourself for being so careless and thoughtless and stupid. “I’m so-”

Sicheng stopped you. “Not now,” he said, looking away. “Later.” You felt uneasy. How could you have messed everything up? Again. 

The two of you did talk it out later, but you knew this would haunt you during those times when you’re alone. You tried to shoo it away. It was just an honest mistake, right?

For a while you did forget, but every time you looked at Ten, the thought would come back to you: you cheated on Ten even after you told you had changed. So you decided to just pretend everything was okay. It could work. 

“You’re going to sleep this early?” asked Ten, walking into your room. You rolled around to look at him. 

“I didn’t sleep last night so I feel sleepy, what’s your problem?”

Ten laughed, climbing over you. “Whoa, baby, I was just asking.” You smiled. How could you not after him calling you baby in that - that voice. Ten leaned his head down, kissing you, and then tugging at your bottom lip. He was always so demanding. One of his best traits. 

“Stooooppp!” You giggled, hands cupping Ten’s cheeks to keep him away from your face. “My lips are getting sore from you kissing me so much!”

Ten leaned down more, his lips right next to your ear. “You’re a fucking tease,” he whispered, his hands bunching your shirt at your waist. “You know you like it, so stop pretending.” You bit your lip as your hands snaked up his thighs, slipping through the bottom of his shorts. 

“Wow, dance practice really payed off,” you said softly. “You’ve got some nice thighs.”

“I’ve got something nicer between them,” Ten smirked, his hand guiding yours up his thigh. Before he could stop, you pulled your hand away, suddenly pushing him off and sitting upright. Ten raised his eyebrows in surprise as you sat on the edge of the bed, avoiding his gaze.

“Hey,” he said softly, moving to sit crossed legged beside you. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” You didn’t say anything, just staring at your lap in discomfort. “We don’t have to do that, you know. Heck, I don’t even want to if you don’t want to.” When you still didn’t reply, Ten breathed out, lifting your chin up to face him. 

“Baby, I’m really sorry,” he said almost desperately. 

“Ten, I kissed Sicheng,” you blurted out. It hurt too much to keep it in any longer than you already did. Ten’s eyes got bigger and he looked betrayed for a second.

Then he said. “It’s okay, it was just an accident right?” You shook her head and the tears just came rolling out. You hated it, you didn’t want appeal to his guilt just by crying but you couldn’t hold it anymore. 

“I did it on purpose.”

Ten stood up. “What? Why?”

“I’m really really sorry. I didn’t mean to, I just had feelings for him for so long and it was just in the heat of the moment.” Ten looked like he didn’t know what to say. 

“Wait, let me get this straight. You like Sicheng?” You nodded, sniffing. “But you’re with me?”

“I mean...you didn’t really ask me to be your girlfriend, you just sorta assumed-”

“Are you fucking serious?” Ten cut you off immediately. “You’re really going to play the victim card?”

You stood up, facing Ten. “No, baby, I was just saying...”

“Don’t call me baby. And don’t start with me. You’re the one who couldn’t even tell me no when you liked Winwin all this time and made me look like a fucking idiot.”

“I’m so sorry!” You cried, furiously wiping away your tears. “I really am. I just thought I’d start to fall in love with you or something. What I did can’t be excused.” You were never good with words and your thoughts were running faster than your mouth could form complete sentences. “Listen, its my fault. Not Sicheng’s, he didn’t even kiss me. He said he didn’t want to as long as I’m with you.”

“You said you changed, Y/N, but I don’t see it,” Ten said, his tone imitating hurt and disbelief. “Who else have you kissed?”

“Ten, please, it was-”

“Hmm, I’m gonna guess...Mark? You two have been hanging out more than usual.”

“Don’t bring Mark into it, please!” You begged furiously. Ten seemed unmovable. And he wasn’t the same lovable and affectionate Ten he usually was. “He’s just my friend.”

Ten scoffed, almost red with anger. “Yeah so was Taeil hyung, and Taeyong hyung and Jaehyun before you went and fucked all of them.”

“I didn’t...” You stepped closer and cupped his cheeks. “I’m sorry, please don’t talk so loud.”

Ten swatted your hands away. “Why so no one will know that you cheated on me with Sicheng?” His voice became louder on purpose. “I assure you, everyone will find out soon enough.” He made his way to the door but you got there first, hand on it so he couldn’t leave.

“Ten, please, I’m so sorry.”

“No, you’re a fucking slut.” You gasped at his rude words and even though you knew it was true, you couldn’t stand being called that. Ten opened the door to see Johnny and Mark standing at the doorway.

“What is going on here?” Johnny asked, concerned. 

“Ask her,” said Ten coldly. He glanced at Mark. “Oh look, its your boy toy.”

“Don’t call him that!” You exclaimed, pushing him back in anger. Johnny got in between you two. 

“That’s not cool, Ten.” He said. Ten stormed away and Johnny followed him. Mark turned to leave as well, but you grabbed his wrist.

“Mark, please don’t,” you whispered, tears streaming down your face. Mark looked ashamed, but he slowly pulled his hand away. 

“I don’t want to,” he said quietly. “But I just can’t defend you anymore.”

yooooooo

there wasn’t supposed to be a part two but part one had such a shitty ending and it looked like you guys wanted another part too. i just needed the closure so here’s the less shitty part two. idk if there should be part three, but if u guys want one then just send me an ask !!

!!psa!! i don’t write smut so like if any of these seems lame or cheesy its bc i’m not used to it lol

[cuccofarmer]

I’VE FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT.

The present differences between One Piece pre- and post-timeskip – A One Piece Essay.

With One Piece’s Dressrosa arc finally wrapping up last year, there has been a collective sigh of relief as the longest running story has ended. The complaints, from what I saw, stemmed from the fact that pacing was a dramatic issue during Dressrosa and its overall length led to a huge loss of interest. Personally, I loved Dressrosa’s story, but I wholeheartedly agree that it was a total struggle to stick out. This was the arc that broke me. I saw the light and switched to reading the manga which is a million miles better, by the way. Despite all the superiorities in the manga, it still suffered from a multitude of similar problems as the anime.

This drove me to try and find out why I still felt a whole inside my heart even while reading One Piece. I had to think long and hard, and dug through the internet to find a lot of other opinions on the matter. I came to the conclusion that, since the timeskip, the overall thematic feel for our favourite pirate anime/manga has just changed drastically. I know this isn’t anything new, quite the contrary and don’t get me wrong I love One Piece a lot and still find joy in following the story.  

Search your mind and think back. Can you remember the good ol’ days when five intrepid kids (yes kids) got on a dingy little ship with dreams and ambitions that they could only wish to achieve? Good, because for many that is what made them fall in love with One Piece. I remember when I started watching all I wanted was to be on that ship with them. It made you feel part of something, like you were really on deck with the crew as they made their way from East Blue to the dreaded and mysterious Grand Line. Even following that, the crusade through to Alabasta, trying to save their very own princess. The diabolical Sir Crocodile, with his hook made of gold and his fearsome sand abilities. Remember as the crew faced off with Baroque Works and found the reason for their fighting.

Oh boy, and even Skypeia. I hated Skypeia for a long time because it was hard to get through, but I can tell you the second time I watched it I found a lot of reasons why it was good. The intrigue, the exploration, the mystery behind the missing island, and by far the best part of that arc, the Almighty Eneru (or Enel for those who prefer). Man was he as good villain. You could argue he was horrible, but just think of his motivation. How evil and power-mad can one man get? All it took was Luffy’s perfect counter to put him in his place.

Then to my favourite ever story arc in all of One Piece. It is so hard to beat Water 7. It had so much good shit crammed into it. Even more surprising if you combine Water 7 and Enies Lobby together as the saga it comes close to the length of Dressrosa. So why is it so much better? For many damn good reasons. Remember when the crew lost Robin, only to find her supposed betrayal? Good Lord was that heartbreaking, even though you knew she would come back there was a tiny part of you that was still secretly worried. There was that deep-rooted connection to each crew member that you didn’t want tainted. For me the defining moment of this saga was when the Strawhat pirates stood at the gates of hell (or Justice if you like), and stared death in the face when they were toe to toe with Cipher Pol 9. Enemies who could swat them like flies and yet they found the strength to beat them against all the odds, even if it meant sacrificing their humanity. Goddamn motherfucking Sniper King. That’s all I have to say.

Thriller Bark had that stink of adventure all over, however slow it was, so you could put up with the crew being duped by an idiot, Moria’s god-awful laugh, and the cringiest moments of Perv-salom. There was a mystery to be solved and a treasure to be found. There was something lacking though. How come Zoro and Sanji were missing for so long? Surely our two favourite hot-heads weren’t captured by the enemy? Well they were, and for one good reason: they needed to make room for the rest of the crew. At this point in the story we had eight crew members with the ninth one being introduced. How much time can you devote to NINE main characters? Five is perfect, six is fine, seven is manageable, eight is pushing it, but nine? It’s one hard task to make sure nine dang Strawhats have the same amount of development.

Luckily the plot went elsewhere at this point, we saw the crew split up and the focus was all on our meat-loving captain. Ace in danger? We better get going! So we couldn’t dwell on the fact that suddenly we were seeing so much less of our favourite nakama even when the crew was all together.

Then you hit the timeskip. Finally our Strawhats are all back together again! This should be a cause for celebration. Except something wasn’t quite right. Who’s this fishman poser? Why is he just a copy/paste Arlong? Luffy’s super duper strong now! Can’t he just squash him? Why do I care about a goddamn goldfish lady? Shira-who? Show me more nakama adventure! Wait what? Sanji’s decommissioned? You’re telling me I waited all the way through Amazon Lily to Marineford and now my favourite goddamn cook is in a fucking coma? I say nay!

Do you remember when Zoro used to smile because he was happy, not because he was sadistically going to cut someone to ribbons? Do you remember when Nami’s character was something more than fan service? Do you remember when Usopp fought through all his fears to look his enemy in the eye and stand his ground? Now he’s just played for laughs. Do you remember when Sanji was suave and collected and not a quivering heap in front of every lady he met? Do you remember when Chopper could ACTUALLY FUCKING DO SOME DOCTORIN’. Now he’s just a squeaky merchandising ploy. Do you remember when Robin, my favourite Strawhat, would ACTUALLY FUCKING DO SOMETHING – LITERALLY ANYTHING AT ALL. Do you remember when Franky didn’t completely look and act like an abomination? Me either, Franky never got that much screen time did he? And Brook, poor skeletal Brook, I hope you get some sort of development, man. It looks promising in Whole Cake Island, you might actually get some real badass action.

Above all, Monkey D. Luffy, when did you become such an idiot. Sure he was always a dolt, but now he just meanders through the story, punching anything in his way. The stakes aren’t as high anymore. Who knows what training the Dark King gave Luffy for two whole years? Hody Jones was a scrub. Caesar Clown was a scrub. Doflamingo was a Hannibal Lecter level badass mo-fo. I bet you he owns that Pulp Fiction wallet, but jfc a build up of close to 200 episodes? Like I said, I am trash for One Piece and the storytelling is still fucking prime. So I’ll keep going, especially since Whole Cake Island has given us a lot of promising material, maybe the first bit we’ve had in the New World.

Here endeth my essay on One Piece. Conclusion? We have become detached from our favourite characters. Through some fault in the story, a by-product of having to fit so much in each segment, we have lost a lot of what made us fall in love with it in the first place. We used to be so lucky we had heroes who we could identify with, who we could journey with. Nowadays we have these super-cool, super-badass pirates, but they’re untouchable. I just wish we had some semblance of the good ol’ days. Maybe I’m just being spoilt.

Also the animation is shit now.

Peace out, I love y’all. TLDR: Pre-Timeskip was better because the characters had more development and were more relatable whereas now they are super-powered infallibles.

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