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kaspbrak-tozier-reddie · 5 years

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Band of Toziers - 4/?- ao3

Pairings: Reddie, Storis, Byler

Words: 14.5k

Preview:

- The Losers come over as soon as Eddie send them a text, with a 'Code WTF?!' - The Party drive up to Derry to meet Richie after Mike sends them all a text Just a sappy chapter on Mike, Boris and Richie meeting the Party and Losers Club.

We're now getting some Reddie, Storis and Byler stuff now ❤

Notes:

Because there are two Mikes, I'm calling Mike Wheeler 'Mike' and Mike Hanlon 'Michael', when the two are in the same place. If I get lazy or lose track, I may refer to both by their surnames just to lessen the confusion.

This does jump from boy to boy, so I'm sorry but it should get better. I've never done this sort of thing before.

An hour after Eddie had sent a 'Code WTF' (Unique situation - changes per person), Bev rushes over. She doesn't bother with the front door and jumps in through Richie's bedroom window.

"Uhhh, did you make a clone machine?" Bev asks as soon as she picks herself off the floor. She eyeballs the three Richie's in the room, noting the subtle differences between the 3 and picks out her Richie, the only one with the bad eyesight. The other two look like weird variations of Richie's personalities.

Happy Richie:

Okay, now she's reaching, but that's just the vibe he gives her.

Emo Richie:

Fall Out Boy,

My Chemical Romance, and

Panic! at the Disco.

maybe industrial

maybe a plug

double lobe

Bev's reaching, but she wants to have fun before they come by and trash her judgement.

"Hi I'm Michael, but you can call me Mike," the one dressed in bright colours says, holding out his hand towards the young redhead.

"Hi, Mike," Bev replies.

"I'm Boris," the emo looking Richie says.

"Hi, I'm Beverly, but please call me Bev," she replies. Her strong demeanour falters into shyness. Nothing about this is okay. Why hadn’t Richie told any of them about his family?

”So, uh, I’ll explain when the others get here,” Richie says.

As they all wait for the rest of the Losers to arrive, the 5 of them sit in absolute silence. Bev is confused, watching as the three Toziers interacted with each other just by eye glances. She noted a heap of similarities in their demeanours. "Weird right?" Eddie asks.

"Yeah, and here I thought one Richie was enough," Bev replies.

Richie's bedroom door swings open and in walks the rest of the Losers Club. "SUP FUCKERS?!" Bill screams as he enters, then he sees the 3 Toziers sitting around Richie's desk. "Oh shit!" Stan, Ben and Mike spot the 3 Toziers in the room. Completely disregarding Eddie and Bev who are chilling by the window.

"Richard, did you finally make that cloning machine? The one you've been talking about?" Stan asks.

"Nope," Richie replies. "This is my twin brother, Mike." He gestures to the identical twin in the bright clothing, "and this is our cousin, Boris."

As Boris looks at the rest of the Losers, he locks eyes with a blonde-haired boy. He smiles slightly, at him, and the boy smiles back.

Now was Richie's introduction of the Losers, all groaning in dread

"Guys, this is Big Bill, our ring leader. If he jumped off a cliff, he'd expect us all to follow," Richie says as he hugs the leader.

"This is Haystack, he's a gifted poet. It got him a girl that's way outta his league," Richie points to Bev and tussles Ben's hair.

"This is Mike Meyers, you know, that dude from Austin Powers. Mike's our nerd, he lives in the library."

"Finally, we have Staniel or Stanley Urine, either one works. He likes watching birds, at first I thought he liked watching girls but I found out he meant the actual animals. So I promise, he's not a creepoid."

Mike and Boris laugh simultaneously.

"Ignore him," Stan says. "I'm Stanley Uris, that's Mike Hanlon, Ben Hanscom and Bill Denbrough." Stan throws a quick smile to Boris before looking away, blushing.

Beverly catches it in her peripheral vision. Stan's demeanour changed as soon as he saw Boris. "Eddie, do you know if Stan had a crush on Richie at some point?" Bev asks the hypochondriac. Eddie feels a pinch of jealousy running through his veins but still thinks upon it. He wasn't subtle with his feelings, but if Stan did have a crush on Richie, it would've been subtle. The hypochondriac tries to get into Stan's mind but comes up blank.

"I don't think so, why?" Eddie responds.

"I swear I just saw Stan blush."

Eddie sits upright and looks directly at Stan. He tries to hide his jealousy, and takes his time before saying, "Richie?"

Bev shakes her head, "Boris."

Eddie wants to laugh, that can't be right. Stan is emotionless and often talks about dying or birds. So, it can't be true, that Stan blushed, Bev must've been seeing things. But then he sees it for himself, Stan is laughing with Boris, his cheeks are bright red but he doesn't even care. He elbows Bev and gestures to Stan, she smirks, then turns back to Eddie. "So, what about you and the Trashmouth? Told him yet?"

"No," Eddie lies through gritted teeth. He has to talk to Richie about it first before they tell the Losers.

"So, Mike, you seeing anyone?" Ben asks Richie's twin.

"Yeah, my best friend, Will Byers," Mike replies.

"Gee Rich, step up your game and ask out Eddie," Bill says.

"I thought that - " Mike sees Richie shaking his head; he doesn't continue.

Much like Eddie, Richie wants to wait until he has spoken to his hypochondriac boyfriend.

Richie listens in on Mike, learning about his group of friends. Like Richie's group, they have a name for themselves. Instead of the 'Losers Club', Mike's group calls themselves the Party.

There's a shit ton of similarities between the two groups that Richie realises as Mike explains. The Party sit in Mike's basement playing Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) and the Losers Club sit in an underground bunker (clubhouse) doing god knows what, mostly drinking and playing 'truth or dare' or 'never have I ever'.

Then as Mike starts explaining his friends, Richie quickly learns that Mike's their ring leader like Bill's the Losers Club's leader.

Will sounds a bit like Eddie;

Dustin = Richie;

Lucas = Stan;

Jane = Ben;

Maxine 'Max' = Bev; and

Steve = Mike.

Richie got all of that just by Mike's descriptions of his friends. It amazes Richie, sometimes, how fast his mind works. Maybe it also has something to do with his undiagnosed ADHD.

"Anyone want anything to drink?" Richie asks, they all said 'yes'. "Eds, can you help me?"

"How many times, Richard? Don't call me 'Eds'!" Eddie responds and gets up, following his tall boyfriend down the stairs.

"Hey, Boris, can I talk to you for a second?" Beverly asks the 'emo-looking' Richie.

"Yeah, okay," Boris replies, he gets up from his seat on the desk and sits on the window sill, beside Bev.

"Do you like Stan?" It catches Boris off guard, it stammers a little. "It's just, he's been blushing like mad and he never really does that." Boris looks towards the blonde-haired boy for the umpteenth time today.

There are several things that Boris notices about the bird expert. The way he stands when talking to people; perfect posture. His hand gestures as he speaks. Boris is not one to believe in 'love at first sight' but he thinks that he can let this one slide. There's just something different about Stanley compared to Theo. He started to like Theo a few months after they started to hang out, maybe it was the drugs or the alcohol but he's been sober for 48 hours now. He hasn't had a craving for weed, coke or alcohol since he laid his eyes on the blonde-haired boy.

Beverly nudges Boris, "you're staring," she states. "I can hook you two up if you want?"

"No thank you, Beverly. I need to get to know Kolibri first," Boris says.

"'Kolibri'?"

"It means Hummingbird in Russian." Boris removes himself and goes back to join Mike and the others.

Bev just lets it sink in, 'Hummingbird'. Why did he call Stan a Hummingbird?

He did make Stan laugh before; it makes sense. Maybe.

Stan looks over to Bev, she quickly signals over. He mutters a quick 'sorry' to Mike, and pads over to Bev. "You called?" Stan says.

"Do you like Boris?" Bev asks, cutting to the chase, she's not in the mood for that airy-fairy bullshit.

"No, maybe, yes? I don't know," Stan sighs.

He too isn't one to believe in 'love at first sight', he finds it bullshit. But he couldn't explain his feelings about Boris any other way.

"He called you a hummingbird, in Russian."

"It's the way I laugh, it sounds like I'm humming." Stan smiles and blushes. Beverly had only ever seen one person do that, and that was Eddie whenever he spoke about Richie. With Eddie, it was a sign of embarrassment and shame because of the bullshit lies Sonia fed him. But Stan? Stan's is because he's shy, he's opening up to Beverly about something that he would normally go to Richie for. Richie would make a joke, to break the tension, but would 100% support him.

"Is it weird? He looks so much like Richie, I need to talk to him." Stan gets up and goes downstairs to where Richie and Eddie are pouring everyone a drink.

"Richie, Eddie, can I talk to you both ab - " Stan cuts himself off as he walks in on Richie and Eddie kissing. "Never mind." He does a 180 and heads back to the stairs.

"Wait!" Richie calls, "We'll explain just tell us what you wanted, please."

"Okay, I'll go first," Stan says, he sighs, "I may have developed some sort of crush on your cousin." Eddie's jaw drops; he didn't misread Stan. Richie smiles, which freaks Stanley out. "Why are you smiling?"

"Because it's cute!" Richie exclaims.

"But he looks like you! I just don't think - "

"You worried you'd get feelings for me or something?"

Stan pauses for a bit and looks at the ground. "I don't know, maybe. You both look alike, he's basically like you. So's Mike."

"Stan, look at me." Stan moves his head up and meets Richie's eyes. "Look me dead in the eyes and tell me that you only see me as a friend."

Stan looks to Eddie, who's still got his lips parted. The blonde boy smiles momentarily at Eddie, then looks back to Richie. He searches Richie's face, looking at the similarities between Boris and him; physically. Okay, so Richie's kinda hot, Stan thinks, but as he gets to the personality, Boris is more chill and conventional. He isn't spontaneous like Richie is.

Richie is bothersome, his jokes are appalling and not to mention his flirting with Eddie. Considering what Stan just saw in the kitchen, he's hoping that Richie will be less vexatious. But then again, even before Eddie, Richie was annoying. Who knew a 5-year-old could be that irritating? Also, he's astonishingly intelligent, barely has to study for anything and will still pass with flying colours (it'll be interesting to see what he'll be like at college). Stan's spent too much time with the trashmouth that he's not fully attracted to him, besides his looks. But that's because Boris, who looks a lot like Richie, opened a floodgate.

"I like you as a friend," Stan says, staring at Richie.

"Also, Stan, please don't say anything to the others about Rich and me, please," Eddie says.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Kaspbrak," Stan replies and grabs a tray off the bench.

The three boys carry up a tray each of the drinks, for the Losers, Mike and Boris. Richie gives Stan a wink and shoves him lightly into Boris, causing him to fall directly into Boris' lap. Stan gives a tight embarrassed smile at Boris before giving Richie the middle finger, to which, Richie responds with his own.

Mike watches from the sidelines, looking between both Richie, Stan & Boris. He nudges Michael, "Does that normally happen?" Mike asks.

"Hmm, no, Stan and Richie say one or two words to each other. Then just stare," Michael replies. "Richie smiling at Stan? That's not normal."

"When Richie tried to set Stan up with Greg, he smiled exactly ... " Bill trails off and looks directly to Stan, who, by the way. hasn't bothered to remove himself from Boris' lap. "Oh."

Even Ben and Bev notice the smile that Richie is giving Stan, whenever their eyes lock. Everyone in that damn room can see that Richie and Stan are best friends. Mike Wheeler thought that maybe Richie and Stan hated each other but that smile; that god damn smile ... It's living proof that Stan likes Richie's opinion. Because Richie and Stan are best friends.

Bev walks over to the three boys, leaving her boyfriend with Richie and Eddie. "You know, Stan told me that he needed to speak to Richie," Bev says.

"That makes no sense," Michael says. "Stan has never once asked for Richie's advice."

"Whenever Richie and I have our smoke sessions on Fridays, he tells me if Stan had spoken to him," Bev explains. "Not to mention, Richie goes to him before he comes to me."

"Wait, wait. Does that mean that Stan found out that Richie was gay before you did?" Bill asks. Bev nodded. "If you knew for a whole 5 months, Stan knew for what? 5, 6? Months?"

"8, actually." The boys' jaws drop; Stan had kept a secret for 8 months and said nothing?

It puzzles the Losers as to why the two-act like they hate each other when, in reality, they're the best of friends.

Mike is just listening in by this point when he starts to get a little bored - he's not going to lie. He decides to talk with the others on the opposite side of the room.

"How's it going, Mike?" Eddie asks.

"Good, good. This is the chaos that I miss," The Party's leader says. "It was before we met Jane and Maxine, it was just us boys."

"Chaotic as fuck?" Richie chimes in, Mike laughs and nods his head. "Say, Mikey, invite your friends up. We've got the room and I'm sure mom won't care. If not, we can chill at Mike's farm."

Mike shrugs and pulls his phone out from his pocket. He opens the Party's group chat inviting the Party up to Derry.

**** **** ****

A few hours later, the Losers, Boris and Mike all head down to the clubhouse. Showing the two newcomers the ropes. As per usual, Eddie and Richie sit in the hammock, just not head to toe like normal. More like sitting side-by-side, cuddling. "Say, Koromyslo, you and Edward? Yeah?" Boris pipes up. Richie ignores the question, only focusing on the unknown word that sounds a Russian translation of sorts.

"What's a 'koromyslo'?" Richie asks.

"Rocker," Boris says monotonously. "So you and Edward? Yes?" Stan giggles.

"You fucking snitch, Stan!" Richie yelps.

"I said nothing, you two are so obvious!" Stan laughs. "You always sit head to toe. Now you're cuddling?"

"You're insufferable," Richie mutters.

"He isn't denying it," Beverly says. "Did you two finally admit your feelings?"

Richie rolls his eyes and looks at Eddie, the boy beside him nods head slowly with caution. The Trashmouth cups Eddie's face in his hands and kisses him. He goes to lean down a little more, trying his best to get in a comfortable position but accidentally leans too much into Eddie. The hammock rocks dangerously and tips the two boys out.

Richie's glasses are just millimetres from falling off his face and are held up by Eddie's shoulder. Quickly fixing them, he looks up to see Eddie straddling him. "Well, I like this view," Richie says. Eddie groans in disgust.

Why? Goddammit, Richie! Eddie thinks to himself

"Come on guys! Leave this place for our innocent childhoods!" Ben groans.

Eddie pushes himself off Richie, dusting himself down before holding out his hand for Richie. "Damn, then I can't tell you ... eh, who am I kidding? I've jerked off to the thought of Eddie's mom down here," Richie says.

"BEEP BEEP RICHIE!" All 6 Losers groan and Eddie punches him in the arm.

"Why do I like you?" Eddie mutters.

Richie looks somewhat offended but knows that Eddie is 100% joking. The two reposition on the hammock and Richie leans over to grab a comic book. His backpack sits by the wooden post that's barely within arms reach. Bev watches on, silently hoping that the hammock tips over again; that would be priceless.

Mike and Boris watch the Losers Club sit around minding their own business. Richie and Eddie are reading a comic together, while Stan is bird watching, from a hole in the ceiling. Bev, Ben, Mike (Hanlon) and Bill are playing cards quietly by the swing.

The only sounds that can be heard are the rustling of pages turning; rope squeaking, as the hammock rocks gently; leaves rustling above them, and birds chirping.

Suddenly a buzzing noise interrupts the silence, every head in the underground bunker turns to Mike. He pulls his phone from his pocket.

"Hey, babe?" Mike answers.

"We'll be there in like a day. We're catching a flight now," Will says on the other side of the call.

"Okay, see you tomorrow, Will. Love you."

"Love you too."

Mike hangs up the phone. "What?" Everyone goes back to what they were doing, leaving Mike to his thoughts.

"It's 6 pm, guys," Bill says.

"Crap! Mom's not going to be happy! I'll be grounded for sure!" Eddie says.

"You're staying at mine, remember?" Richie says as he helps Eddie out of the hammock.

"Shoot, sorry, Rich."

"All good, Eds."

Mike follows but looks back to Boris, who's waiting patiently for Stan. The Wheeler boy sees something in his cousin's eye; a look that he's seen today and every day, for the past year. It's the look of love, no doubt about it. He climbs up the corroded aluminium ladder where Richie and Eddie are waiting. Mike feels a slight wind change and sees Eddie shiver. As if on intuition, his brother wraps his arms, tightly, around the hypochondriac. "Hurry, you two. Eddie will get hypothermia!" Mike calls.

"It's not that - " Stan emerges from the bunker and immediately gets hit with the wind change. "Never mind, it's a wee bit chilly."

Boris quickly hoists himself up and shrugs off his leather jacket, enveloping it around Stan's shoulders. The boy blushes ferociously, as he tugs the jacket's opening together, he leans into Boris for extra warmth.

As the 5 of them walk up to the streets of Derry, Mike feels like he's 5th wheeling, slowing down his pace to walk behind the couples - one couple; Richie breaks his awkwardness.

"I was thinking since your friends and boyfriend are coming tomorrow, what if we go on a camping trip? The 6 of us? The week before we're set to go to college?" Richie says.

"Hang on Rich, 6 of us?" Stan asks.

"Well, wouldn't want Boris to be 5th wheeling now, would we?" Richie replies, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Yeah, but why me?" Stan states.

Richie simply points to the leather jacket that's enveloped around the blonde's shoulders. Stan reddens again, leaning into Boris to conceal his embarrassment, but that only makes it worse.

**** **** ****

The following day, Mike awaits the arrival of his friends. All but Dustin and Lucas were coming, due to last-minute college plans and family vacations, the two couldn't make it; but Max, Will and El are coming. The three of them are catching a taxi into town. "When were you friends supposed to get here?" Maggie asks Mike.

"9 am," Mike replies, still pacing impatiently. The clock on the wall reads '11 am', the Party is 2 hours late and Mike's starting to worry. "Maybe their flight's delayed."

Maggie nods, hugging her second son briefly before heading off to work, leaving Mike and Richie alone, in the kitchen. The Wheeler boy checks his phone again for the 10th time within the past 20 minutes, still no messages from his friends. Richie makes another cup of coffee for himself, putting himself in the way of Mike's pacing line.

"Check the Snapmap," Richie says, getting annoyed with his brother's pacing.

"I don't have snap chat, and neither do my friends," Mike replies.

Abruptly, a boy comes down the stairs in nothing but boxers, huffing out in annoyance. Boris could hear the two of them, all the way upstairs. He's usually a heavy sleeper so how the fuck is Eddie still asleep?

"What even is social media?" Boris replies groggily.

"Did you seriously just get up?" Mike ripostes.

"Yes, now quiet. I need my normal 4 cups of coffee before anyone talks to me," Boris says and grabs the pot of coffee, pouring it into a mug that he pulls from the cabinet above. Richie and Boris leave the kitchen to wake up elsewhere, allowing Mike to deal with his chaotic crisis.

Finally, 3 hours later, the Party shows up, "What the hell?" Mike says as he stands on the bottom-most stair. "Where have you guys been?!"

"Our taxi broke down, we had to walk all the way here. No reception." Will puffs out.

"Mike, who's at the - oh, hello," Richie says as he goes down the stairs. "I take it, you're Will." Will just about faints when he sees Richie and it doesn't help that Boris exits from the kitchen, causing poor Will to faint.

Richie yells for Eddie with his 2 fanny packs (that he no longer uses) but still has first aid supplies.

The feisty young lad comes bounding down the stairs with a cold and wet cloth. "Well, lay him down," Eddie says. "And Boris, Richie, mind if you leave the room? I don't want him to faint again." The trashmouth and the emo leave the room, while Eddie tends to Will.

"Richie wasn't kidding," Mike says.

"Yeah well, you pick up a few things when your mom makes you think you're sick when you not," Eddie retorts; he turns his head to look at the girls. "Hey, I'm Eddie, Mike's told us all about you."

"I'm El, and this is Max," the brunette says. "Who were those boys?"

"The one with the glasses is Richie, my boyfriend and Mike's brother. They had no idea that the other existed until yesterday." Eddie explains. "The other, dressed in black, is Boris, their cousin. He was adopted by a Russian family when his parents died. His story is super morbid."

Will stirs on the couch and Mike rushes to take Eddie's place beside Will, keeping the cool cloth on his head. "What happened?" Will asks.

"You fainted, guess my brother and cousin are a bit too much," Mike says. "You okay?"

Will nods and Mike leans down to peck his lips.

"Don't worry, I'll bring them out, just don't faint on me again," Mike says.

"Wouldn't dream of it," Will replies, the boy spots Eddie in his peripheral vision. "I'm Will Byers."

"Eddie Kaspbrak," Eddie replies and takes the cloth off Will's forehead.

Mike walks back out with Richie and Boris; the two boys behind him, scratch the backs of their heads nervously as they are introduced to each of the Party members. So as it turned out, Mike and El dated before Mike got with Will. It had taken El moving away with the Byers for Mike to realise that he wasn't in love with El, he was in love with Will. "I had spoken to El, about it," Mike says, "thankfully she was understanding."

"We were better off as friends anyway," El states.

It's awkward for a moment, and Richie thinks of a good icebreaker. "Shall we head down to the quarry?" Richie asks.

"Where Koromyslo?" Boris asks.

"You know where we were yesterday?" Boris and Mike nod, "It's a few yards further, it's where we like to go swimming."

"Ahem!" Eddie fake coughs.

"Sorry, most of us, like to go swimming. Eddie hates it because there are germs," Richie fixes. "But, babe, let me just say that there are germs everywhere you go, including a hospital."

Eddie rolls his eyes. "If we're going, we need swimwear," Eddie says. El and Max look at each other, "Shit, Richie maybe we should go and get Bev."

Richie whips his phone out and immediately starts texting the redhead and not even 2 minutes later, she's bursting into the Tozier residence.

"I heard two gals needed swimmers," Bev says. "Hello, I'm Beverly Marsh, the only girl in the group of 7 dirty annoying, chaotic boys."

"Piss off Marsh, I just wanted the swimmers. You're not coming," Richie spits, then starts laughing and as does Bev. "Sorry, she can be a bit of a handful sometimes. Ignore her, she's just happy that she has other females to talk to."

The redhead sticks her tongue out at the trashmouth, only to get a middle finger in return. "Well Bev, I'm Maxine, Max for short. And this is El," the other redhead says. "I think we're going to get along just fine." Bev leads them up the stairs, letting the 4 boys wonder what the fuck just happened.

"Girls." They all said simultaneously.

**** **** ****

As the lot of them finally made it to the quarry, they are aced with the massive cliff. "Is it safe to jump?" Max asks.

"We do it all the time," Richie says.

"Yeah, after Bev constantly shows us up," Eddie replies and on cue the redhead pushes past everyone, jumping straight into the murky green water below. Boris goes next, somersaulting into the water.

"Oh come on!" Richie cries and goes to do a run up.

"No! Don't you dare, that's dangerous"' Eddie says sternly, Richie gestures to Boris. "You're clumsy and idiotic; he's probably done a heap of practice. Do. Not. Do. It."

Taking his boyfriend's advice he just does a basic run and jump, landing feet first in the disgusting water below.

Since Eddie is left with the newcomers he links them up, standing in between El and Will, taking both their hands in his and guiding them forward. Mike spits out the shitty water that got into his mouth and as does Eddie.

Boris, Bev and Mike immediately start to splash each other and wrestle, in the water; while Richie sits on the sandbank to get to know the others a bit.

Max starts off, talking about how she beat Mike's highest score on an arcade game. It was the initial reason as to why she thought Mike hated her. ' 'MadMax' beat my high score '. Richie and her, got talking about skateboarding, he had always wanted to try it but never got around to it. "I'll show you, I taught El not too long ago and now she's a pro," Max says.

"Well, in that case, sign me up," Richie replies.

El's next. She had fled the orphanage when she was 12/13, she met Mike, Dustin and Lucas in the woods one rainy night while they were looking for Will. Richie starts to laugh as El said that Mike hid her in his basement for a solid few months without no one knowing besides Dustin and Lucas.

Before Will can say a word, Richie feels cold water on his now partially dry hair. "You're dead Marsh!" Richie bellows.

"It wasn't Marsh this time," Eddie teases.

"I don't care that I love you, you're going down Kaspbrak!"

Will, Max and El watch on as Richie and Eddie tackle each other, laughing.

#reddie #storis #byler #richie x eddie #eddi x richie #stan x boris #boris x stan #mike x will #will x mike #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #stanley uris #boris pavlikovsky #mike wheeler #will byers #it chapter 1 #it chapter 2 #the goldfinch #stranger things

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league-of-light · 6 years

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Week 4 Pick’em

Look, I know I’m late on the picks this week. I wanted to get them in yesterday, but other things came up and I didn’t get to it. I’m sorry, ok? To make up for it, I have written quite the long pick’em for this week. I’m not entirely sure if I will be able to make them this long every week, but I think I should be able to.

Why would I spend all this time writing the pick’em? Great question. Isn’t there a more productive use of your time? Probably. Will, you’re moving next week, shouldn’t you be packing or something? Are you just spending way more time writing picks as a means to delay the inevitable anxiety you’re going to feel about starting a new job and moving? Do you think this is the healthiest way to deal with that? Psh, you’re not my therapist.

Anyway, here goes

Yerboi vs Brenner? I hardly know’er

This Will vs. Brenner bout, should be promotionally billed as “Chronically Injured and Underperforming” vs “Complete Lineup Ineptitude”. Both teams come into Week 3 at a resounding 0-2, and are looking to get their season on track after some of high profile trades in the first couple weeks of the season.

There are always big expectations when you make a trade in Fantasy Football. Typically speaking, you hope and expect that the players you got are going to outperform whomever you traded away (or at the very least perform somewhat similarly). Unfortunately, that won’t always be the case. Sometimes there are weeks like last week, where JuJu outscored T.Y. Hilton and I am forced to sit there and reflect on how I would have won if I just kept JuJu. Other times, there are weeks like this week, where Brenner ensures he doesn’t have to deal with the emotional trauma of a trade gone awry because he benches the players he traded for. (No there aren’t, this literally never happens)

I pick myself, simply because I don’t think I’ve actually ever seen a team projected to score as few points as Brenner.

Story To Watch: How quickly it will take Drew Brees to score more than the 3 points Brenner got from Tyrod Taylor. My guess is 4 plays.

Tangiphil vs Hewie and the Hashslingers

After a fairly explosive first week of the season, we can all finally exhale — Phil’s team is bad again. Shockingly, his 3-headed Running Back Monster is down a head. Unlike the legend of the Hydra, instead of another head growing in it’s place, Phil decided to chase last week’s bench points and play Nelson Agholor. If you check his bench this week you may notice Joe Mixon outside of the IR slot, Isaiah Crowell’s wasted 18 point TNF total, and another Jets receiver. That’s right folks, it’s week 3 and Phil is already in midseason form.

But enough about Phil. Steve is 2-0 and I expect his win streak to continue this week. In my humble opinion, his team is underprojected with only 98 points, as Big Ben, Melvin Gordon, and Marvin Jones all look poised to be playing catchup in potentially high scoring games. Look for Steve to hopefully rise in the power rankings after squashing Phil.

Story To Watch: He may be the second head of a three two-headed running back monstrosity, but Adrian Peterson is going to look more like Mike Wazowski than James P. Sullivan this week. The Packers offense comes to FedEx Field with an offense that looks like two-day expedited shipping, while the Redskins offense has been looking like the Pony Express. Game script gets away from the ‘Skins and they abandon the run.

Kyle vs Sean

Close to half of this league isn’t from Rockland, so I’m going to use this opportunity to tell a story. To the hometown heroes - some of the overarching details may be incorrect, but I don’t care I have the talking stick. If you want accuracy you can write the damn blog post next week. Anyway, in sixth grade every middle school student has to take World History. The curriculum is geared towards ancient civilizations, and a decent chunk of time is spent on Egypt. As such, every year there was (is?, not sure if they still do it) a grade-wide Egypt project where students had to use their knowledge of Egypt, make something, and showcase it to the class. Think of it like a science fair, but with crappy Egyptian dioramas instead of baking soda volcanoes. Since I was a bright eyed ambitious young man who loved art and mythology, I knew I would do great on this project. I chose the ambitious task of making a sculpture of Horus, the Falcon-headed man prince of the Egyptian pantheon. It wasn’t long before I realized my doodling skills didn’t translate well into making 3D models, but I was in far too deep. I molded the clay as best I could, and then “accidentally” left it in the oven too long so it burned to a crisp and was nearly unidentifiable. Needless to say, I didn’t do very well on that project.

Why am I telling you this? Because look at Sean’s team. Does it look real good on paper? Sure. Does that mean he is likely going to win this week? Probably. But has his overconfidence blinded him into creating a team made of glass with absolutely no depth in a 16-team league? 67%, yes. (Because that is the grade I got on the project.)

Story to Watch: Alex Collins has become the running back equivalent of Hillary Swank. Hot or not? Stay tuned this week and find out…

You Guys Again vs. Johnson Ertz

The moment you’ve all been waiting for is here folks. I…..I can’t believe it’s finally happening. After almost two full years, the day has finally come. Dylan Feldman vs. Dylan Costa are facing off in a fantasy football matchup which I am officially dubbing “The Battle for the Right to be Called Dylan in the Fantasy Football League Group Chat” (and since we love our acronyms here, aka TB4TR2BCDITFFLGC). Two Dylans enter, only one Dylan leaves. This matchup is arguably one of the most important matchups we have ever seen in this league, and has a chance to change the history books forever.

Unfortunately for Dylan Costa, his squad isn’t exactly striking fear into anyone these days. I’ll have to go with Dylan Feldman, but his lineup has more red letters than Hester Prynne after an all weekend slumber party at Arthur Dimmesdale’s Dimmesdale Dimmahome.

Story to Watch: With the return of Aaron “I smoke Marijuana so Bowers thinks I’m a bad person” Jones coming back to Green Bay, Jamaal Williams’ usage should be monitored. As the kids say, he hasn’t been very good over the past two weeks, and Aaron Jones is ready to come in blazing *~!420!~*

Bearkley vs. Watch Me

Imagine my shock when I saw I won the bidding war for Ryan Fitzpatrick. I immediately rushed to find the owners of the Tampa Bay WRs so I could celebrate our good fortune as Fitzmagic showers us all with fantasy points. Now imagine my shock when I saw Samantha has benched Chris Godwin, not only a rookie (we all know my irrational hype with rookies), but a rookie whose name is lit a combination of God and Win. I don’t know about you, but doesn’t it feel like Samantha has renounced God and doesn’t want to win this week’s matchup?

On the flipside, Nico runs our Dungeons and Dragons group, and if the 80s taught me anything it’s don’t feed weird aliens after midnight, and that D&D is for devil worshipping heathens. With any hope of good Christian fun squandered for this matchup, it really is anybody’s game. I want to believe in the underdog, but more favorable matchups lead me to believe that Nico will pull out the W.

Story to Watch: Saquon Barkley caught 2 of 6 targets week 1 against the Jags. That number increased to 14 of 16 targets last week as Eli Manning completely lost interest in holding on to the football for more than 1 second. Is it possible that Saquon receives 28 targets this game as Eli Manning has to look JJ Watt and Jadaveon Clowney in the eyes?

Washington vs. Walshington

I want to take a second here and pour one out for Walsh, who didn’t answer my trade offer or my text message regarding Dalvin Cook and Allen Robinson. Walsh, you took an injury bullet for me and I will forever be grateful. It’s appropriate that I mention taking a bullet, because rumors have it Frank Gore was actually there when the first metal bullet was shot in 1425. Between Gore and Kerryon Johnson, Walsh will be lucky if he gets 14.25 points from his running backs this week.

Andy surprisingly continues to ride or die with Andrew Luck, despite Luck being unable to throw the football more than 15 yards. At this point I assume he is just taunting Arielle with Bortles on his bench, and we have to assume that if Bortles continues putting up 30 point games, eventually Andy might start him. The biggest story on this squad is how Andy managed to get two of the best big play boom or bust WRs with John Brown and Will Fuller, while also having Amari Cooper and Mike Evans. That’s a solid receiving core you got there pal, and I just want you to know I see it and appreciate it.

Story To Watch: C’mon, it’s Philip Lindsay. Every week it’s Philip Lindsay. Everyone loves a hometown hero and I have greatly enjoyed watching this kid ball out.

Bowers v Arielle

I’m high on Dylan Leone Arielle’s team this year. How could you not be? It was drafted by a man who has $45,000 in fantasy football great young woman who has shown her commitment to the league. For whatever reason, ESPN’s site stopped working just as I was going to look at this matchup, so unfortunately I am going to have to give an abridged write up of my pick. I have played these teams back to back so you would assume I know who is on their rosters, but I can’t remember anything other than Russell Wilson and James Conner on Arielle’s team, and Golden Tate and Kirk Cousins on Bowers’.

Based on this limited memory alone, I suppose I am going to pick Bowers in what will likely be another close matchup for the Reikland Reavers

Story to Watch: The story of life as I take this momentary absence from ESPN’s Fantasy Football to reflect on the finer things in the world. Like Yahoo Fantasy Football.

Jason v Harnsowl

ESPN is still not working for me, neither on my phone nor my computer, so I can’t really give much analysis here. However, not much analysis is needed. Unlike his godless sister, Jason is a man of faith. And if George Michaels taught us anything, it’s that you gotta have faith. You gotta have faith, faith, faith. Carson Wentz returns this week and I don’t care whoever Harnsowl is playing, it doesn’t really matter. I mean, as far as the matchup is concerned it might matter, but emotionally speaking, Jason has already won this week.

I can’t be expected to pick a winner in a matchup that already has a winner, so instead I’ll take this time to remind you to spay or neuter your pets. Bob Barker used to do a fantastic job of reminding the American people to do so, and if I am being completely honest I just don’t think Drew Carey delivers the message with the same panache. Like sure, I know Drew still says it at the end of the show, but does he really even believe it? Only Drew can really answer that question, but if I had to guess I would bet $100 $101 Drew. While we’re on the topic, if any of you ever manage to go on Price is Right and you do that thing where you bid one dollar higher than someone else did, you can consider our friendship over. Not only is it the worst strategy ever, it’s also rude as hell to the other contestant. In some cases I’m sure the people legitimately don’t know what to bet after someone else bet around the same thing they did, but for the love of God at least bet like $10 higher so there is some tension in the room.

But yeah, back to football, I pick Jason

Story to Watch: The next episode of Price is Right, Monday September 24th

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sheusedtobesassier · 3 years

Text

Day 10,785

172 days until I hit my thirties.

So. An assortment of 172 good memories from my twenties.

001. Addey hype mumbo jumbo singing along with Moana before she was really talking.

002. Being asked to say the big thank you at SOE graduation.

003. Isaac’s face when he peeked at Omar’s new shoes at the East Towne Starbucks.

004. Drinking Mike’s honey moonshine while we played Euchre in his starry cicada humming backyard.

005. Taking Mama on the water taxi rides when she visited me in Chicago.

006. Grandma Kathy calling me, “My pink haired granddaughter.”

007. Sneaking into camp with the Hines girls to write up collaboration glass bottle poems in the Prayer Chapel.

008. The slow and steady hike up to the Hollywood sign.

009. The night I kidnapped Mini Farm kittens to snuggle for a movie and accidentally left the gate open releasing the rest to the Wisconsin wild.

010. Sunday afternoon sipping Stella Artois in the perfect sunny front room of our Albany Park apartment.

011. Zoë giving me all her wallet cash so I could buy bare minimum groceries.

012. Taking turns reading The History of Love aloud in our Winter Staff Forest Springs apartment.

013. The Halloween/Hillside round of Murder in the Dark with All Stars only.

014. Acting a fool in the unfinished Lodge room filled from floor to ceiling with Tempur-Pedic mattresses.

015. Doug lounging in the giant crate of laundry bags in the laundry room.

016. GUBS INSIDE JOKES.

017. St. Patrick’s Day 2021, hahaha.

018. Beyoncé: Lemonade in the empty downstairs apartment with Mary.

019. Accidentally getting kayak drunk from a backpack bottle of Ménage à Trois.

020. Daylight skinny dipping with Amber to inaugurate the new pool.

021. The perfect stray cat that came around the second half of 2018.

022. Renate being the first to cry with me post breakup. Bill supplying sparkling water to prevent dehydration.

023. Doing drag makeup in Bekah’s bathroom while her and Marissa giggled at each other in the tub.

024. Every kitchen island conversation I’ve ever had with Steve Hines.

025. The perfect colors the night we snuck up on the helicopter landing pad on that Dallas hotel.

026. FACILITATING THAT SAME WEEKEND’S GAME OF ASSASSIN, BEFORE IT GOT UGLY.

027. Becoming buddies with all four Williams brothers.

028. When Mercy told me I’m her favorite Williams brother.

029. Hahaha the Camp Clean Up I put Elliot on my crew for my own amusement and told him his only responsibility was to walk around with me the whole time.

030. The time Blaine and I were avoiding the long lunch line together and Nimanim was like, “Wait so this is like an actual friendship huh?”

031. Tanner enthusiastically reenacting Gandalf’s YOU SHALL NOT PASS as I came up the path.

032. Will realizing I’d Facebook stalked him without sending a friend request.

033. Magically finding Pop Rocks the morning of my perfect 22nd birthday.

034. My perfect 26th birthday weekend in Minneapolis with my dreamy local girl gang.

035. Tauri’s blossoms on the Sky Lodge trees in the spring.

036. Encountering and becoming completely enthralled by the Enneagram.

037. OLIVIA FUCKING GATWOOD APPRECIATING MY PINK HAIR.

038. Clementine von Radic writing that Greyhound always loses her luggage too.

039. My stretch of obsession with Hemingway’s love interests.

040. Becoming friends with Fat Boy Tucker pup.

041. Becoming friends with rescued best dog Star girl.

042. The night Doug was my ride from the airport and he pulled his truck over so we could take a good look at the gigantic moon.

043. That hilarious flirtatious moonlight wander of the horse trails with Omar and Edith and Caleb.

044. Jake Nelson giving me a surprise scoop of chocolate custard as a peace offering after his grumpy bedtime attitude.

045. THE DISCOVERY AND CAPTIVATION OF HADESTOWN.

046. Getting to have Alia in every day for a while there.

047. Les Mis at Overture Center because Ally bought our family tickets.

048. Pat Coakley telling me I don’t know how special I am.

049. Spit handshake with Janelle swearing we’ll never think any boys are cooler than we are.

050. Marissa picking me up without explanation to take us on a quiet sunset drive of her favorite county road.

051. Jayden imagination playing with Blue, Guy, and a motorcycle for a whole night then waking me up with them the next morning.

052. Genevieve asking to borrow my lavender romper for her rehearsal dinner.

053. Getting to be Cali’s sidekick the week leading up to her wedding extravaganza.

054. Houston YMCA hallway phone call from Justin’s dorm room asking me clarify which of the boys was Nick, Schmidt, and Winston.

055. The absolutely ludicrous old woman I got drunk with in the Amtrak dining car.

056. The absolute ludicrous glass skull light up cocktail I drank at Freehand’s hotel bar.

057. When Dan Hartke told me I’m a mother hen.

058. When the most beautiful Sora from Korea told me, “You always flowers.”

059. Hannah’s hand me down Steve Madden sandals.

060. Runaway trips with Amber Bamber to watch Shakespeare in the woods.

061. Storytelling with Jack Thomas.

062. Drunk bar darts after Corn Fest with Marissa’s gang.

063. Leaving the reception with Emmy to go curl up in Amber’s bed and giggle about how it was the last place she slept as a virgin.

064. The night Riana and Zoe and I took turns putting our heads out the car windows to howl like wolves.

065. Falling asleep on the couch with Zelina and Chelle beer buzzed watching Jersey Shore.

066. That perfect little basement Thai place a couple blocks from Emmy’s apartment dorm.

067. When Dan forced me to get out of his car and left because I’d annoyed him too hard on our library trip.

068. Vicki suggesting we go live together overseas.

069. Depop photoshoot with Taurilyn.

070. Mykenza bluntly declaring true things I couldn’t confirm or deny.

071. Norm announcing to the full room he was teaching that I was a rascal.

072. Zochella.

073. Noah Gundersen and Brett Dennen at The Majestic.

074. Every damn time we ate beautiful food at High Rock Cafe.

075. The nights I felt capable at TOCHI.

076. LENA DUNHAM’S GIRLS.

077. Jordan suddenly ballroom dancing Genevieve around the kitchen.

078. Staying up late crying to my mom about trying to take good care of the lesbian teenagers at Sky Lodge.

079. The night Caleb very suddenly showed up with a bowl of sangria then tried to leave a dozen times but we convinced him to stay.

080. Rachel swearing that the man in the Wrigleyville bookshop had love at first sighted me.

081. Making the list of how many musicals I’ve been affected by.

082. Discovering weirdo La Llamada then driving straight to Carlsons’s to immediately watch it again with them.

083. Writing heartfelt correspondence back and forth with Kat for a few years.

084. All the funky cards I’ve received from Amber.

085. Finding that PERFECT dress at Goodwill for Tauri’s Winter Ball.

086. An actual friendship with Paul Bierdeman.

087. COUNSELOR MEETINGS.

088. The night Emily Holverson and I stood outside the Lodge trading sincerity about Sky Lodge and the complications of ministry.

089. Blunt conversations with Josiah, hahaha.

090. The Lower Lakeview round of Murder in the Dark when I killed every single person playing before anyone could call, “Dead body!”

091. When I suddenly caught him listening to my singing in the tunnel.

092. Putting together outfits from Lolita’s wardrobe.

093. Driving into such an unexpectedly lush part of Missouri.

094. A nighttime surprise of Big Ben and The London Eye and Buckingham Palace and St James Park in the falling snow.

095. MY PERFECT ABODE IN ST. LOUIS, MO.

096. OUR PERFECT ABODE IN ALBUQUERQUE, NM.

097. Becoming one of Steve’s best friends.

098. The evening Elorine and I didn’t go with and REALLY talked.

099. THE UNDENIABLE INHERENT GOODNESS OF MERRY’S KIDS.

100. Farrell’s crying apology on the sidewalk outside of Maple.

101. Alex’s irregular sudden extreme compliments.

102. The females I’m close with over the internet due to mutual admiration.

103. Lars from Hinge, hahaha.

104. Sitting at the end of a long table with Janelle making a napkin list of our all time favorite manic pixie dream girls.

105. The handful of LotR marathons we’ve accomplished.

106. When Kat told me she understood the Harry Styles crush but that maybe he wasn’t right for me.

107. Reading so many Donald Miller books and getting others to read them too.

108. Kisses on the cheek from Esther.

109. Getting raspberries for Mike’s turtles as an apology for making death threats.

110. Tipsy dancing alone with my eyes closed for like a hundred songs at Sheryl’s Club on New Years 2021.

111. The flattering comparison to the wonderful Harley Duke.

112. Aw omg, our happy hammock stacks at Observatory Hill.

113. Telling slumber party stories on stage for Women’s Retreat.

114. BEING THE MIME FOR LIFE GROUP’S FAVORITE.

115. Fatigued watching The Kissing Booth and laughing harder than ever.

116. Spastic goofing around with Ashley AND Brittany the day we moved Amber into her new home.

117. Sitting on my closet floor showing crying Riana baby videos of singing piano playing Janelle.

118. Giggle running through Piggly Wiggly parking lot at closing with Rene with like $400 of alcohol on Ally’s birthday.

119. Fireball shots ALL NIGHT with Jeremiah and his uncle on Christmas Eve.

120. Listening to the delicious details of Emmy’s Europe romance.

121. Zion giving me his Adidas crewneck as sentimental goodbye gift.

122. Arguing with Austin over our differing zombie apocalypse ideologies.

123. Drunk Discord/Among Us with Hunter and Bekah and Nick and Marissa.

124. How soft Kenny’s absurd speeches made my heart.

125. MINUTE LONG VOICE MEMOS STACKS WITH ROSIE. ♡♡

126. Listening to Lizzy McAlpine in an afternoon candlelight bath.

127. Listening through John Mayer’s The Search for Everything mowing the ball field.

128. Emotionally painting my old house in Birmingham.

129. Being really damn good at that Heads Up game with Omar.

130. Compiling worthwhile stuff for Foreman training.

131. GROWING MY PLANTS.

132. The stretch when Bryanna was usually wrapped in my blanket.

133. Talking about going to Colorado with Alex.

134. The notorious reputation of knowing everybody at CCCA.

135. GETTING ALL DRESSED UP FOR DINNER THEATER.

136. Calling Ally from a parking lot at Emmy’s bachelorette party because I was SO CONFIDENT I was a hot person that I had to talk to her about it.

137. Playing the stupidest laughingest game of The Floor Is Lava with Jackson when I came to visit them all in Dallas.

138. Feeling really really really at home in my apartment at Sky Lodge.

139. How Ryan Boon would struggle to talk through his laughter.

140. Belonging to myself at Fiddleheads Coffee in Cedarburg.

141. THE UNDENIABLE IMMEDIATE CHEMISTRY BETWEEN ME AND COURTNEY HART.

142. Big Falls County Park. Every time.

143. Kayaking down Blue River with Duke, Jeremiah and Addey, Hunter, and Hunter’s friend.

144. That perfect burger at Pier Burger in Santa Monica.

145. Riding The Brown Line down to The Loop and all the way back up.

146. Aw. Welp. Every lengthy truthful phone call with Sam.

147. The four seasons I was compiling four second videos.

148. Ashley’s and my perfect roommates stretch, featuring our perfect couch.

149. The night we forced so many to come to our Blackfish showing then sign our petition opposing Sea World. Hahaha. #emptythetanks

150. The night Ben and I sat in the corner giddy burning through TriBond cards.

151. The night I showed up at Doug’s and Lueck’s door losing my damn mind over The Dress.

152. Community Soccer at the local elementary school gym.

153. Frigid stranded in the Chequamegon National Forest with Mary and Caleb on our return drive from our nightmare trip to Duluth.

154. The final night of being “cats in a bag” sleeping in Janelle’s bottom bunk.

155. Filling up the broomball courts under a negative degrees meteor shower.

156. Getting another wonderful summertime of Delala.

157. The Sunday service the pastor wouldn’t quit snapping his fingers and a bunch of us were txting each other like, “OMFG NO AHHH HOW DO WE MAKE HIM STOP????”

158. Oomph. The perfect veggie omelette (no cheese) at Sparks.

159. Dad’s soft voicemail about his admiration for Adele.

160. Their neighbor lady Maddie’s outfit for the Christmas cantata and her disappointment with the unfamiliar song selection.

161. Raquel’s completely irresistible fun streak.

162. Listening to folklore with Jayden and the girlies first thing when I woke up every morning for a while there.

163. Going through Met Gala looks cuddled up with Omar.

164. The way it felt reading Anthropology of an American Girl.

165. The giant primary colors crochet blanket mom made for me.

166. Noah scooping me up in that hug in the Waterloo parsonage kitchen.

167. When Omar completely surprised me with what he can do to a piano.

168. Deciding I am a Pinot Grigio girl.

169. Omfg, the Nest Night we intensely debated our way through a Staff Wives wrestling bracket.

170. Dismantling multiple purity talks and dress codes like it’s my calling.

171. Laying on blankets in the middle of many fields in different places for the sake of being very very very very sunkissed.

172. Regularly running into Bill at Kwik Trip.

#personal

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inawickedlittletown · 6 years

Text

Walking The Wire (25/?)

Summary: Tony Stark always knew about Peter Parker. He didn’t know that Peter was going to get superpowers and become Spider-Man, but he always knew about Peter because Peter was his son.

This will span from pre-Iron Man up through the rest of the MCU (eventually including Infinity War) and will be for the most part canon compliant except where I’ve taken some liberties and interpreted canon a certain way.

Pairings: Pepper/Tony, Tony/Steve (endgame), Tony/Mary (past)

A/N: If you want me to tag you when I post new chapters let me know. This fic is also on AO3

I used Collider’s MCU timeline to stay canon and the title of this fic is an Imagine Dragons song that is just so fitting for Peter and Tony

Masterpost

Chapter Twenty Four

Pepper was almost a little surprised that Tony had kept her specific access code working on the workshop keypad except that she really wasn’t because Tony probably still considered her one of his best friends just as Pepper knew he held that title for her. Aside from going to the tower for SI business, she hadn’t entered the tower since the break up and definitely not the penthouse, and walking into it felt strange since Tony had remodeled it yet again and none of it looked like it did before. She also had to note that Tony had made things more to his liking rather than hers. It didn’t look bad. It reminded Pepper a little of the Malibu house.

The workshop was still mostly the same and when Pepper stepped inside, Butterfingers actually greeted her and the other two bots followed. She touched each of them and then looked towards Tony who wasn’t alone. She would have expected Bruce, but he was still nowhere to be found as far as Pepper knew, so instead it was Steve.

Steve had stood up from the futon that hadn’t been there the last time Pepper had been in the workshop. She suspected its addition had something to do with Steve’s presence.

“Good afternoon, Ms. Potts,” he said with an easy smile and a nod.

“I didn’t expect you here, Captain,” Pepper said but smiled at him nonetheless before she turned towards Tony who probably hadn’t even noticed that she was there.

“Just keeping Tony company,” Steve said and sat down again. He had a sketch pad in one hand and a tray with art supplies.

“That’s nice of you,” she offered and then walked towards Tony and touched his shoulder but he didn’t react and Pepper hadn’t expected him to.

“It has not even been an hour, Steve, no cheating,” Tony said after a moment proving to Pepper that Steve was probably spending a lot of time in the workshop with Tony. It was something to think on later, though, because that wasn’t why Pepper was there. She touched his shoulder again.

Tony turned. “Oh,” Tony said when he saw her and then dropped whatever tools he’d been using on the table and grabbed her into a hug. “Pep, what are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you were coming. I haven’t seen you in a while.”

Pepper let her arms fold around Tony. It felt good to know that Tony was over them and over their relationship enough to just welcome her back gladly. For a moment, she didn’t want to give him the news except that she had to because even Tony would notice that they were footing the bill on a funeral.

“I didn’t know I was until earlier today,” Pepper said as she pulled away from him.

Tony frowned at once. “What happened?” he asked.

Steve got up to join them and Pepper didn’t mind that Tony had his support. It was good. Tony would need it -- he needed someone that would stick around and that cared. Pepper took a deep breath.

“Peter’s uncle died yesterday. He was shot in the chest and didn’t make it to the hospital,” Pepper said and tried not to think about the phone call that she had received from May Parker who had told her through tears and sobs.

“Shit,” Tony said at the same time that Steve said, “how’s Peter?”

“May said that Peter was with him when it happened,” Pepper said. “He wasn’t hurt but he was with Ben when he died. May said he was distraught.”

“Damn,” Tony said, “he seems to have the worst luck in the world. Absent father, step-father dies, now his uncle dies. That aunt of his better stay in perfect health.”

Pepper could tell that it pained Tony to know that Peter was in pain and she watched as Steve reached out to Tony and placed his hand on Tony’s back and Tony just leaned into it before glancing towards Steve and giving him a soft and open look that made Pepper pause. This was not at all how they had interacted the last time she had been around the two of them.

“We have to -- we should send something. I don’t know flowers? Maybe food? And we have to cover all the bills. Everything. The funeral, whatever the ambulance and the hospital cost. They shouldn’t have to worry about any of that. I don’t even -- should I reach out to Peter? Will it matter?”

“Hey, hey, calm down,” Steve said and then turned towards Pepper as if waiting for her to make the decisions and she supposed that that usually did end up in her hands.

“Write to Peter but just don’t make it harder on him,” Pepper said, “I already told May not to worry about anything including the funeral.”

“This is why you’re the best, Pepper,” Tony said and smiled at her but she could tell that he was worried about Peter.

The funeral felt like it was happening in some other plane, as if Peter were just viewing it from afar and not actually there are all. His mind kept wandering off to the day that Uncle Ben died, and he couldn’t get rid of the image in his mind of Ben on that cold hard asphalt and the blood everywhere.

Peter had come to at the hospital with a nurse hovering over him and telling him that he had suffered a panic attack. It had taken a long moment for Peter to ask after Uncle Ben and even longer for the words “he died, there was too much blood loss, but we tried everything we could” to register.

He didn’t calm down until Aunt May arrived to get him and to hear the news for herself and Peter didn’t even know how he could look at her, especially when he remembered that he could have stopped the robber and that he had the means to stop him and just didn’t. Except that May just hugged him tightly and let him cry and she cried too and when they headed home they didn’t say anything and they stayed in the living room together for a long time just holding each other and Peter almost let the guilt fade away.

The next day he woke up on the couch alone and he almost wanted to believe it was a nightmare, except that Aunt May was crying in the kitchen.

“He said to tell you he loves you,” Peter said, then.

It set her off again, but she hugged him and Peter found himself crying too and somehow it felt good to let it out.

At some point Ned and his mom appeared with food and flowers and hugs. Peter just didn’t know what to say or how to act, so he just didn’t try. Ned just sat with him and it seemed to be enough.

Later that night he received a letter that someone must have personally dropped off.

Dear Peter,

I am so sorry. I don’t have the words to express how sorry I am that you are going through this except to say that it is extremely unfair. From every story that you told me about your uncle, I know that he was a good man and a man that loved and cherished you and that should have remained with you longer. You know well, far better than most unfortunately, that loss is a part of life. It doesn’t make it easier to accept. I know that no words will make a difference in this moment and I’m sorry for that too because if I could I would make all of it better for you without much prompting but that’s impossible.

People like to say that time will dull the pain and eventually it will become easier and in some ways that is true. You know both of my parents are dead -- have been for a long while now and I still feel sometimes like I missed out on a lot with them and that they should have been here for my accomplishments and yet I was able to keep going and keep being me and doing everything I could to not stagnate because they were gone. You need to grieve and to feel the loss, but do not let it consume you. Be sad. Be angry. Be anything you want to be, but be you and be the person he wanted you to be.

If you need anything, anything at all, I am here for you night and day whenever you need to talk or to just scream into a void. Remember him fondly and remember he loved you because that is the best and only thing left to do. He’s with you in all the ways that you are like him and in everything he’s taught you. One day the pain won’t be so sharp and you’ll look fondly on the time you spent with him.

Take care and give your aunt my condolences,

Tony Stark

Peter tried not to cry on the letter, but a few tears did fall on the paper. He just couldn’t help it, not when Mr. Stark made him feel like he actually genuinely cared and understood.

May didn’t tell him that Mr. Stark had paid for the funeral and that he had been responsible for all the other little things that made their life that much easier like all the meals that were delivered and the woman that showed up to clean the house and even the planning of the funeral. She didn’t tell him until the day of the funeral when everything seemed just a little bit too expensive for them to have been able to afford and Peter had to ask about it because it was something he noticed in order not to focus on Ben.

As Uncle Ben was lowered into the ground, Peter tried not to cry. Aunt May’s hand was tight around his hand and Peter knew deep down that he could have prevented this. It was not only Uncle Ben that had been shot that day, either, and Peter could have stopped that guy. He could have made it harder for him to hurt anyone and not doing so made him just as guilty.

He and May stepped forward to pick up some of the dirt and throw it in over the casket and as Peter threw his fistful he swore to never not do his best to help anyone that needed it. He was going to become Spider-Man.

Tony wore a disguise to the funeral and kept himself near the back. He wanted nothing else than to try and offer Peter any comfort that he could, but he also realized that he couldn’t and probably shouldn’t. Instead, he watched May hold his son’s hand and he tried not to dwell on how much his boy had already lost. Steve who had gone with him had held his hand instead and Tony couldn’t help but feel grateful to how much of a steady presence Steve had become.

Later, he was in the tower and Pepper who had stuck around for the funeral appeared in the kitchen while he prepared a cup of coffee.

“I don’t think this is the best time to tell Peter, but it might do him some good if he knew he had a living father.”

“He doesn’t need that on top of everything else,” Tony said, “maybe in a few months when Ben’s death isn’t as fresh. How’s May?”

“She’s doing as well as she can right now. I think having to be there for Peter is helping.” Pepper had reached out to May again a few times and would continue to do so because Tony just didn’t feel comfortable when he and May had never had the same rapport that May and Pepper did.

The next few weeks were odd. Tony hadn’t known Ben Parker personally, but he had essentially been his son’s father and raised him so in a way Tony felt a little bit like he too had lost someone important in his life. He definitely felt the pain for Peter too at losing someone so important in his life and it wasn’t too surprising when he didn’t receive any letter or email back from Peter. Eventually, it became something he didn’t dwell on too much because there were other things. Hydra was still active.

The Avengers were chasing leads on Hydra operatives and so Steve had gone on some mission chasing a lead. Tony was a little bit worried about it because he had only taken Sam with him.

So, Tony worked on B.A.R.F. It had been obvious to him after visiting the old house at Christmas that he wasn’t over the death of his parents or probably a number of other things that had happened when he was child and then Ben dying had truly reminded Tony of the fact. To try and re-imagine them felt like the best therapeutic way to deal that didn’t include finding a therapist that wouldn’t spill all of his secrets. Sam had been some help in looking over how Tony intended the project to work and adding his own input in what might actually make a difference from a psychological standpoint.

Tony planned on showing it off at the MIT presentation that he’d agreed to attend. He couldn’t remember the last time that he had actually gone back to his alma mater and he was looking forward to giving back to those kids whose ideas would change the world. The September Foundation had been one of many charities that his mother had started and been chairman of and Tony was proud to keep them going. The foundation funded scholarships every year, but Tony was making one change this year and doing more than just scholarships because getting those brilliant kids through school wasn’t enough when they couldn’t find jobs or get the funding they needed for their ideas.

Pepper had even agreed to go with him and do her part in representing the business side of Stark Industries. They didn’t want to say it, but this was also a bit of a headhunting trip because they wanted to expand on a few fields mostly to do with medical equipment and there were some promising kids graduating soon that Tony had his eye on to snatch away from other competing companies.

Chapter Twenty Six

#Peter and Tony fic #iron dad and spider son #mcu fic #iron dad fic #peter and tony

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ethanalter · 7 years

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Ben Barnes on breaking bad in 'The Punisher'

Ben Barnes as Billy Russo in The Punisher. (Photo: Netflix)

Warning: This post contains spoilers for the second half of The Punisher‘s first season.

When Ben Barnes accepted the role of Billy Russo on The Punisher — the new Netflix series starring Marvel’s famous gun-toting vigilante, Frank Castle (Jon Bernthal) — he knew that a dark future awaited his character. After all, in the comic book realm, Russo frequently dispenses and endures punishment as the gruesomely scarred villain, Jigsaw. And though the show changed some details about Billy’s origins — making him Frank’s longtime friend rather than his longtime nemesis, for example — his ultimate fate wasn’t likely to be altered. So for Barnes, the question wasn’t “Will Billy break bad?”; it was “When will Billy break bad?” The show’s producers didn’t mind making him wait to find out. “They were fairly clandestine even with me about any sort of twists and turns,” the British actor tells Yahoo Entertainment. “We were shooting Episode 5, and I was thinking to myself, ‘Is there going to be a turn? Is it going to happen?'”

Turns out that Barnes had to wait only one more episode. At the end of the sixth hour, “The Judas Contract,” Billy emerges as one more member in the conspiracy that odd-couple allies Frank and Micro (Ebon Moss-Bachrach) are working to unwind. That revelation sets the two on a collision course that ends with Frank essentially creating the man who will become Jigsaw.

We spoke with Barnes about the scene that reveals Billy’s true nature, and why his memorable role as Logan on Westworld made him a better bad guy.

Yahoo Entertainment: Were you excited to play the moment where it’s revealed that Billy has been part of the conspiracy against Frank all along? Ben Barnes: We did a read-through of each episode before we started filming them, and I remember the read-through for “The Judas Contract” very specifically. Our showrunner, Steve Lightfoot, was there, and so were some of the executives from Marvel and Netflix. We finish reading the episode, and there’s the reveal of who Billy’s in league with. I remember Steve going, “Billy Russo, you dirty, dirty boy.” I just looked at him and went, “You wrote it!” [Laughs] They were quite excited about that turn because after that point, Frank Castle is battling the powers that be in a more general way, as well as his inner demons and stuff. So it’s nice to get a little bit more specific about it. The truth is that there’s not really any kind of a traditional big bad [guy] in the comic book sense in this particular series. It’s an origin story for both of the characters in a way. While they’re at odds by the end of the series, they haven’t become each other’s nemeses yet.

Once the reveal happened, I wanted to go back and rewatch Billy’s scenes up to that point to see how that reveal was teased in your performance. Obviously, I did know it was coming, and I was asking all sorts of questions about my involvement in things, but they wouldn’t tell me exactly what they had planned for the future. I would want to know what my involvement had been in Frank’s past — I needed to be up to date on that stuff at least. So when I’m playing my game of cat-and-mouse with Dinah Mandi [played by Amber Rose Revah], I could sort of pick and choose as an actor what moments are feeling a little more genuine or whether he’s a ruthless liar through and through. I thought it was interesting to see for the first time in a Marvel series such a slow burn in terms of character. You genuinely don’t know what side this person is on.

What sort of discussions did you have with Jon Bernthal about how much Frank knows, or suspects he knows, about Billy? We had a lot of discussions about their pasts, and we actually shot some scenes that may be being saved for any future seasons that might come about. There was exploration of their history as friends, and we see them together as partners and as “Uncle Bill” in terms of his relationship to Frank’s family. In a lot of these universes, the “villain” has done something that’s wronged the hero in such a way that can never be forgiven, but in Billy’s case, a lot of the other characters have done much worse things in terms of organizing the massacre of his family or trying to keep him at bay. I think that Billy’s betrayal is only keeping information from him, which in the grand scheme of the Marvel universe is not the worst crime that’s ever been perpetrated. However, because of their closeness and their brotherhood, it seems so much more.

Barnes with Jason R. Moore in The Punisher. (Photo: Netflix)

And for my money, Billy is actually kind of broken from when he’s a boy, so Frank is the one man he has respect for. He sees something of himself in him, and I think that’s what makes the betrayal sting for Billy too. Because when you’re playing these characters with such different shades of morality, it’s important in portraying that character to believe everything I’m doing is absolutely on the level. I actually feel a bit sorry for Billy in certain circumstances. What he’s doing is out of self-preservation and love, and it might be for the wrong, but I wanted to play it that he cares very deeply about Frank. I don’t think the story really works unless Frank holds a special place in Billy’s life.

In a sense Billy is already broken, so his final transformation into Jigsaw — when Frank slices his former friend’s face on glass — is a case where he finally looks on the outside the way he does on the inside. Yeah, absolutely. I sort of saw it in stages, like a game of Jenga. Billy was essentially orphaned and abused as a child, and that’s corrupted him a certain way. But from being in the military, he’s built up this kind of incredible mask, which is based on the way he looks, the way he dresses, and the way he treats women. It’s all this giant mask, so the idea of the shattering of that mask is the final thing in terms of losing how he sees himself. That’s part of the idea of using mirrors in our version — as this cautionary tale of narcissism. And that’s stacked up against the idea that he could have brain damage in some way, which they mention in the last episode. I have no idea what they’re going to give in terms of how the Jigsaw character will be revealed, but I certainly have my ideas about how it could work, and how he could be a more traditionally threatening figure in the Marvel universe.

How important was your role on Westworld in terms of transitioning from the heroes you played early on in your career to the more villainous roles you’re playing now? It looks like you’re really enjoying being bad. It certainly helped prepare me in terms of the boldness of my choices. Earlier on in my career, I felt like if any accusations were leveled at me, it was that my performances were a bit traditional and what people were used to. So I made a decision that I’m just going to be a bit braver, and I think that Westworld allowed me the opportunity to do that — to really kind of stretch my legs in terms of mischief. Obviously, the two characters are very different; Logan is more of a pain in everyone’s neck. One thing I asked is that he never say something that wasn’t true. There was one line where he had to [lie], and I told [the writers], “It’s really important to me that Logan never lies.” He’s weirdly a bit of a moral compass for the real world, I think. Of course, I have to be on his side because I have to play him! But yeah, I did want to take some of that momentum through to The Punisher and be a little more broken and evil and malicious. I’m having fun pushing where that can go.

Will Logan be back in Westworld‘s second season? I am back a little bit in the second season, which is not something I necessarily expected! But I am back, and I will say that everything that I’ve encountered so far is different. I have not read full scripts or anything, but it’s certainly flipped me upside down in terms of what I was expecting from the series. No one’s going to be disappointed in terms of it pushing the envelope!

Season 1 of The Punisher is currently streaming on Netflix.

yahoo

Read more from Yahoo Entertainment:

Review: ‘The Punisher’ makes ultraviolence seem inevitable

Review: ‘Marvel’s Runaways’: Cool teens versus villainous parents

6 things to know about ‘Godless,’ Netflix’s star-packed limited-series western

#_revsp:wp.yahoo.tv.us #ben barnes #hbo #westworld #_author:Ethan Alter #netflix #jon bernthal #_category:yct:001000086 #_uuid:925f8cf5-ff9a-31c6-bccf-5fc98fdbf0a3 #_lmsid:a0Vd000000AE7lXEAT #interviews #the punisher

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hotdogjumpingfrog5 · 7 years

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It’s Strange - Chapter 6

Previous Chapters: Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five

The person turns around, which reveals to be Beverly.

“Oh, hey guys.” she smiles

The entire group stares at her behind Bill

“Y-You’re b-b-back?”

“I am,” she says, “Me and my aunt came back from Portland two days ago. I was hoping to run into you guys if I came back to the same spots. I never forgot about any one of you.”

Ben ran up to her and gave her a hug, he never thought he would ever see again, and was overjoyed to see her face again “So good to have you back, Beverly!!”

“I’m glad to see you too, Ben!” Beverly responded, while hugging back

Bill sighed, then had the courage to ask her another question.

“A-A-Are you c-c-coming back to s-s-s-school with us?” he asked

“We only got here last week, and we’re literally on the edge of Derry and Hawkins,” she says, “I should be back to school in another week or so.”

“Oh yeah,” says Bill, “W-We’d l-l-like you t-to m-m-meet our other f-f-friend,” says Bill, “S-She j-j-joined us l-l-last w-w-w-winter.”

“Aka my sister.” says Eddie

They both looked at each other, and exchanged grins

“Hi.” Ella greeted

“Hi.” Beverly responded

The other losers were dumbfounded, and didn’t really know what to say to her, it’s been over a year since they last saw Beverly.

“And I’m glad to see the rest of you,” she said while hugging them, “Stan, Mike, Richie, and Ella, glad to meet you too.”

“Guys, it’s really fucking cold out, why don’t the eight of us go to the arcade or see a movie or some shit?” Richie suggests

“I agree,” said Stan, “I think a storm is about to pick up, it’s starting to get really windy out.”

“Black Moon Rising came out a few weeks ago,” says Mike, “We should see that.”

They all come to an agreement, and make their way to the local cinemas.

When they get there, they are a little over an hour early, the previews not even started yet.

Bill, Mike, Ben, Eddie, Richie, and Stan are sitting in one row, while Beverly and Ella sit in front of them, not wanting to take up that entire row, besides, the pair of them already seemed to like each other, as they been chatting for a while.

“Ugh, they haven’t shut up since we got here!” says Richie

“Do you even know what they’re saying?” says Stan

“No, they sound like chipmunks from a distance,” Richie responds, “They’re just…girls.”

“And what the hell is that supposed to mean?” says Eddie, “I don’t blame you though, Rich, try living with El. Whatever, I’m going to run to the bathroom for a minute.”

He watches Eddie head out the door, then looks down at his popcorn, and proceeds to flick the pieces at them. Then looks at Stan, to see his reaction.

“Really Richie?” Stan says, annoyed

“Yeah, that isn’t very nice.” Ben says

“Damn right it isn’t!” says Beverly, turning around. Her and Ella trying to remove the popcorn off their clothes and even pieces that happened to go down their clothes. “Ella, has Richard been annoying this entire time I was away?”

“Mhmm.” Ella mumbles.

“You like it.” Richie smirks

Third day of February, and Mike sits in class next to Dustin, Will and Lucas.

“So, what are your guys’ plans for Valentine’s Day?” Dustin asks, remembering that the day is approaching soon

He could tell by the look on Mike and Lucas’ faces that they had a few plans to spend time with their special ones, since they were the only ones taken out of the four of them.

“Me and Lucas will be going on a double date together for dinner.” says Mike, “Other than that not a lot.”

“Yeah, and perfect timing too, as it falls on a Friday!” Lucas says happily

Dustin looks down, wondering what he did to not have anyone yet.

Mike notices the expression on his face and gives him some advice.

“You’ll find someone eventually, I can promise that.” Mike convinces

“Yeah Dusty,” says Lucas, “I’ve told you that before, it just takes a bit of time.”

Uh huh, I’m so damn sure about that, heard it all be fucking fore. Dustin thought.

“I’m not doing anything that night, both of us can hang together if you want. I’m sure my mom won’t mind.” Will tells him

Dustin agrees, he wouldn’t mind spending time with a friend to take his mind off the fact he’s single. He could tell Will didn’t really care about being single, unlike himself.

“Oh wow, two freaks making plans to go on a date with even freakier freaks, and looks like we got toothless and zombie-boy going gay for each other!” Troy butts in, while shoving past them.

“Leave us alone.” Lucas orders, not wanting to be bothered with him and James.

“Midnight, you make me sad. Sad that you and your ginger girlfriend have no souls.” Troy snickers.

“Oh yeah, frogface, your girlfriend’s sister is a massive slut by the way!” James chuckles

Troy gives James a punch in the side, and says “Shut the fuck up, James, I do the talking, you do the laughing. Got it? Good.”

He turns around, disgusted by the sight of them.

“As I was saying,” Troy says hotly, “Frogface, I heard your sister and your freaky girlfriend’s sister had some great fun with each other. Oh yeah, how many people did that Evans girl fuck? Last time I heard it was up to 110.”

“Why don’t you shut the fuck up, Troy?!” Mike thrusts his fist on the desk, “Nothing you say is ever true.”

“Even if it was, why did you choose to tell us about Nancy and Cathy?” Dustin asks, annoyed

“Figured you’d love to hear,” Troy says slyly, “It’s a shame you didn’t die, zombie-boy, your family are insane psychopaths. That explains very well why you’re so quiet. Just waiting to secretly commit a school shootin-”

Dustin kicks him in the crotch, twice, before he could finish.

Troy clutches himself in pain, unable to move or say anything.

“Look, I’m not in the fucking mood today,” Dustin snarls, “You piss us off or any of our other friends, we will definitely get Eleven and Cathy after you. Got it? Now stay the fuck away from us.”

They limp away in pain, too afraid to even tell on them.

Mike, Lucas, and Will look at Dustin, and his eyes are like a wild man, and Dustin is glowering into space, not looking at them.

“I think he’s in a bad mood.” Lucas whispers, and Will nods

“Yeah, let him cool off for a bit.” says Mike

February 13th, 1986.

Steve, Johnathan, Nancy, and Emma sit together in the cafeteria for lunch.

There are a few moments of awkward silence, and each of them telling each other what’s on the go, their plans, etc.

“So, I guess you guys have big plans for tomorrow?” Steve asks Johnathan and Nancy

“Yep, we made reservations for this expensive restaurant downtown of Derry.” says Nancy, “The Boardroom I think it’s called?”

“Yeah, I think we’ll spend the night in town,” says Johnathan, “There’s a hotel next to it.”

“You both make such a lovely couple.” Emma grins

Nancy and Johnathan accepted the compliment, while smiling.

Steve looks over at the rear doors of the cafeteria, and notices four strange looking girls push open the doors and enter. Emma takes notice too.

Nancy and Johnathan turn around to see what they are looking at, and see the lanky figures enter.

The four girls take notice of them, and walk in their direction.

Emma’s nose begins to run all of a sudden. She grabs the tissues next to her, and luckily the running of the nose ends.

They stop there, right next to their table. Just staring at them.

“Hi, can we help you?” Nancy asks, kindly.

“Hello.” says the leader of the group, whose voice sounds masculine. “I am Hillary Bordeaux. And these are my friends; Catherine Hockstetter, Bethany Hughes, and Victoria Critch. We are from Texas, we currently live about an hour and a half outside of Derry-Hawkins.”

The four of them look at the four girls strangely, the leader standing about 5′8″ or so, an overweight girl with black hair, standing about 5′10″. Then there’s a blonde girl, about 5′9″, who is really quiet. And the most sinister looking and creepiest of them all, a dark haired girl, who is way above average height for a girl, over six feet, and really skinny.

Nancy, Emma, Johnathan, and Steve stare at them, not knowing what to do or say. There was now an awkward silence. Emma’s gut instinct was telling her there was something terribly wrong. They looked more like men in disguise rather than abnormal looking girls or transgenders. Their hair does not even look like hair, more like wigs.

“Do you know where Billy Hargrove may be?” “Hillary” asks.

“Don’t know, don’t really give a fuck. Don’t know who that is.” Steve says, sluggish.

The four of them’s facial expressions began to change. Their excited looks turned into a more annoyed, vengeful stare.

“Hey, big eyed, dark haired girl. With the emo dude next to you,” says “Hillary”, “You look a lot like…you know what, nevermind.”

The other three girls snicker, while looking at the four of them.

“Are you related to Beverly Marsh by any chance?” Hillary asks Emma, “We’ve heard spicy rumours going around about you.” she says, while licking her lips.

The three girls behind Hillary begin to burst out laughing, and Emma tries to keep her cool. She knew who Beverly Marsh was, her sister Eleven had recently met her when she moved here, though Eleven was very indifferent about her, kind of like she was with Max.

“Those are not true rumours!” says Steve

“Bethany, get over here. Now.” Hillary demands.

“Bethany” walks over to Emma, and lets out a gigantic belch in her face. Emma cringes, and makes the most disgusted look.

“Huh. Guess not then.” says Hillary, “Whatever boys, I mean girls, let’s go.”

With that, they go out the opposite doors from the other side of the cafeteria. The four of them sit there, clearly weirded and freaked out by those strange looking girls. Something about them wasn’t quite right. They looked unsettling to look at, and they sounded so…gay. They looked more like men in disguise rather than those other trannys. In fact, they gave such a creepy vibe, none of them wanted to bump into them again.

“That was weird…” Johnathan mumbles.

They all agree, and eat their food in silence, wondering what or who the hell they just encountered.

Steve sighs, trying to change the subject.

“Hey, Ems?” Steve asks, sheepishly

“Yeah?”

“Are you…doing anything tomorrow?”

“After school I’m running errands with my mum and sister at the shopping centre outside town.” Emma responds, while biting into her pasta, “Then we’re going out to have Chinese around 6:30.”

“Oh…okay.”

Steve looks over at Nancy and Johnathan, whose facials expressions are telling him ‘She’s clearly not interested’

About two minutes later, as they are about to get up and leave, Carol and Tommy block their view.

The four of them ignore them, but Tommy and Carol don’t seem to be taking no for an answer.

“It’s a shame to look at the four of you,” Carol laughs, “You guys are trying way too hard. It’s quite obvious that none of you are-”

“It’s quite obvious you’re a bunch of idiots.” Steve interrupts

“Don’t talk to my girlfriend that way.” says Tommy

“He will talk to you guys however he wants.” says Johnathan

“Johnathan…” Nancy mutters

“You both abuse women and children.” says Carol, “Nancy, you know it. And Evans, I heard your count this week was 17 guys. Covering yourself up isn’t going to hide the fact you are Derry-Hawkins biggest slut, and you know it.”

Tommy laughs like a schoolgirl at what Carol had said, while the four of them were just appalled.

Emma’s eyes fill with anger, and she stands up.

“Look, none of what you said is true.” says Catherine, annoyed, “Steve and Johnathan would never hurt anyone.”

“Oh my god! Evans, stay away from me or you’re going to give me an STD!!” Carol says loudly

People begin to stare over at them, the occasional laughter or snickering could be heard in the cafeteria, but quickly carrying on with their own business.

Emma’s eyes begin to turn black, rage boiling inside her.

“Why don’t you or Billy ever listen to me??” Tommy whimpers

“Because you can’t fill my needs and I’ve been doing Billy behind your back!” Carol yells

The whole cafeteria gasps

Emma sees someone with a bowl of soup, but makes it fly out of their hands.

“Hey!”

Then, it pours all over Carol. She shrieks, and the entire cafeteria turns to stare.

Laughter rings through the cafeteria, Carol looking angry as hell

“Strike three, now we stay the fuck away from them!” Tommy says angrily

“You guys are fucking TRAITORS!!!” yells Carol, frozen in the same spot

That doesn’t stop people from looking and snickering at Carol from a distance.

“Can’t wait for this year to finally be over, so I never have to see any of your faces again!” she yells at the four of them, then looks on to the rest of the cafeteria, “And the rest of you!! Can’t wait to get out of this fucking town away from everyone in Derry-Hawkins!!! Arizona, California, New Zealand, where ever I get fucking accepted, as long as I’m far as hell from everyone in New England!!! I will never come back!!!!!!”

With that, she storms out of the cafeteria, along with everyone looking at her as if she has four arms, a random guy calling out “No one cares you clown!”.

Everyone resumes back to their chats and food, trying to forget about psycho Carol.

“Think she’ll ever bug us again?” Steve chuckles

“I have high doubts.” Johnathan smirks

As the four of them head outside, they decide to go for a walk on the trail behind the school.

Johnathan noticed some fabric off the path, and pointed it out to everyone

They all walk over, and they find female yoga pants, four pairs of blouses, one skirt, and four wigs.

They knew those strange girls that approached them were wearing those exact same clothes.

All paralysed with fear, and worried that those strange girls might be watching them, had fled back into the school, and even looked behind them after to school to make sure their cars were not being followed by strange looking people.

Next Chapter: Chapter 7

#stranger things #it movie 2017

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succulentsstars · 7 years

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Deleted/Unlisted Video notes

So a few months ago, I came across a list of some unlisted and deleted D+P videos and decided that for my own personal interest as well as some others’ perhaps, I might take some notes. Though I initially tried to keep my personal opinion out, I️ eventually gave in So if you’re interested- here it is! Unlisted/Blocked Video Notes Phil- 79 Dan- 36 3 videos a day average 23 a week AT LEAST 2005 38 uses for a cushtie Feb 7 P- 18 D-13 • Never uploaded to YouTube • Mother in kitchen • Hedgehog and lion (not the) on bed • Buffy cutout • Cream corner couch • In childhood home • Unknown ‘girlfriend’ • Dad at computer • W/ four friends. Guy and three girls. • Girl w/ pixie cut • Girl with eyeliner • White Calvin Kline underwear • Girl w/ eyeliner again • Turtle? • Guitar red • Another unknown girl • Another unknown girl • Unknown guy • At some sort of pool? 2006 Awaiting the Tide Feb ?? P-19 D-14 • First vid uploaded? • Beach setting • Black hair/short/spiked • Plays Micheal • Mellisa • Louise • Argue over Phil • Terrible acting • “Sorry girls I’ve chosen Daniel” • Licks horse?kangroo? (Donkey) • Blue walls/living room? • Blue carpet • In Phil’s childhood home living room • April Harper • Victoria Maclean The game- a short horror film set in future March 12 P-19 D-14 • Described in Tatinof • Hair getting longer • In Phil’s uni room • Picture wall • Kill bill above Phil’s bed • Lesbian couple • White Levi’s shirt • Door has bathroom like handle • Rooms numbered • Door to left of entry hall, then switch back staircase • They all come out of this door, maybe this was Phil’s room? • Other door on left between Phil’s door and staircase • Shower labels • Shower room separate from sink (to left) • Downstairs door? • At least three levels • Sink on second level across from stairs to right is shower • Two doors? To right of shower on wall • Three girls and four boys? (Including Phil) • Entry hall has at least two doors on left and at least one on right • Third level- two doors on left • Door across from stairs leads to bath (room) and closet? • First door on left third floor is bedroom • Kitchen is on first floor opens up to other area with lots of doors? Concrete floor • Fiona Sheldon- one of two lesbian couple, dark brown, long dark brown hair, brown eyes? • Pete tannion. Thin glasses, slight under chin beard. Thick eyebrows. Light brunet • Cat Lofthouse. Little bigger, shoulder length mid brunette hair • Rob Davies. Mid brown hair, half bowel ish hair, thick ish glasses • Tessa Blake. Other lesbian. Short dark brunette hair • Andy Day. Played killer. Really spikey hair brunette. • Andy helped Phil write it My first videos Aug 13 P- 19 D-15 • Complication • Someone taking shots? • Kitchen • Four girls in their house living room- big tv, white flap curtains, dark green walls? • Two walking outside by fence • Unidentifiable song • Other room w/ computer in corner • Karrina and Phil • Pool • Mum/ family at Grand Canyon • Australia • Martyn! • More shots • Australia • Kangaroo • Laughing with Ella in house bedroom Kerrina visits my House Sept 21 P- 19 D-15 • In Phil’s childhood home • Orange Jacket • Black hair getting longer • Starts in oranger and yellow striped room with multicoloured bedspread • Fancy glass and wood front door • Grey car out front • Kerrina dirty blonde with over shoulder length hair • Yellow armchairs in living room (2) facing tv • Yellow couch to left, facing wall • Blue pool table behead a chair • Phil can juggle (sorta) • Playing bubble bobble • Phil bossy with game • Jeremy Kile show • Old phone flip phone • Finding ringtone • It’s a lion • HUGE backyard? • Fenced in by orange wall? • FUCKING PALM TREES ON RIGHT • stone walkways in fountain?? • Door covered in pictures • American flag on ceiling • Looking out at backyard from room • Window across from door Strange Dreams (Episodes 1-5) 18 Nov P-19 D-15 • ‘The mystery lion’ • Rapid voices • Almost bald? Guy in glasses/ black winter clothes • Phil has long hair • In green shirt • Steve the giraffe • In Phil’s childhood home • In bedroom • Buffy stickers in door • ‘The journey’ • Phil in hoodie • Room change • ‘Wake up’ • In bathroom • Wooden door • Old camera • Coming up stairs into hall • Into multicoloured bed room • Ian? • ‘Dreaming’ • ‘Man from future’ • Glass room W/ houseplants plants • Me and Anja Test My Camera Dec 27 P-19 D-15 • Phil likely visiting family on Christmas vacation • Filmed Christmas Day • Hair not nit to shoulder • Bw striped shirt+ black jacket • Hold wall • Anja- hair lot like Phil’s- Black, fringed • Window from Pinof! (Crappy church window) • Camel • Definitely in Phil’s house • In hall • Simon the camel • Photo with door to left of window in hall • Pressable screen?!? Omg! • Weather in 1242 haha • “Very welcome...Phil and Anja are going to shout happy Christmas now” “child” omg Phil’s mum calling him child I love her • To Alex • Barking at you? • Bye • Going to play board game now, rapido 2007 Car Journey to Leeds Feb 4 P-20 D-15 • New Year’s Eve • Dark hair, styled shorter • Mark is driving • Dark b hair, bowel ish cut • Raining • Emily is back left- shoulder length straight platinum blonde, somewhat round face • Victoria is back right- wavy brown hair thicker eyebrows. From awaiting the Tide videos • “Hello Philip” • Emily Resolutions “eat less crap do more exercise get with less dickheads” • Mark- “your grandchildren are going to see that Emily” • Phil says Emily and Victoria going to kiss • At midnight • Now! • No • We’ll have you having sex on the back of the ** in no time • Mark roar like a lion • Emily’s going to kiss Phil • YESS! • Wait no I’m going to change that • Phil in green tee shirt • They do little kiss • Highest motorway in world • Yesterday is calling me Big Ben strikes 12 Mar 1 P- 20 D-15 • In front of Big Ben on corner of road going towards it and road going past it • In London • It’s 12 • Slightly longer hair • White shirt with black stripes on sleeves • Freind with glasses who looks like mr sersion • Ian? • Maybe Pete Tannion his roommate? Awaiting the Tide 2 Mar 1 P-20 D-15 • Michael- Phil • In yellow diagonal stripe tee • Hair covering neck • Melissa and Louise • Episode two return to the beach • Pans over flower bed • In orange stripe room • Palm tree • Has sunglasses folded in shirt neck • Singing along to perfect day? • Outside house? • In glass greenhouse thing • Tv in there • Redish wood house • No it’s Phil’s fence • Filmed at Phil’s house • Louise has dog grey? Biggish lion, turtle?, and rabbit? Stuffed animals • Wearing old reindeer antlers Phil had on facebook profile • Sitting with Melissa in living room? With dark wooden doors? And green couches and curtains • Hold hands and skip • Fancy place with hill overlook, pillar like fence, Roman • At top of Phil’s yard- upward hill to right • Old lady? His grandma? • Care home?? • Room with yellow bed sheets • Fake gun • In yellow sitting room- not Phil’s house? • “I care about Micheal so much but now he’s with Daniel” lol • Haha terrible acting • To be continued • April Harper • Victoria Maclean- went to Leeds • • Phil’s Video Blog- 18th March 2007 Mar 18 P-20 D-15 • Hair almost brownish? Maybe camera • Green green hoodie • I’m back at home now • Thanks for all the giraffe names • Cuts to pic with Phil and giraffe (at uni) • Prize is amazing • His pet goldfish Nemo- covered in black splotches • Laying in tank • People kept saying it’s going to snow • Just a bit of snowflakes • Have to get on plane on Tuesday • Anxious • Sick of winter weather • Going to Florida • Mother’s Day • 1 year since first vlog • Lol bad editting • Haven’t changed much • Videos too long • Gets animal- lion • Grandma visited- shows her • Welsh in her head- doesn’t know it • V old • Gives thumbs up 10/10 grandma • Martyn visits • In glass room • VC? What it means • It snows!!! • Grandma there next day • Wow pics of subscribers • Have a great waster • • Florida One- Intro and Gatorland Apr 7 P-20 D-15 • Brownish hair • Down to neck • L blue shirt • Arrived in Florida- at house • V white • Shows street • Looks like typical neighborhood but nice and with palm trees • Shows house • Not one in 2017- only one floor • White Mini Cooper??? • Ian has come on holiday with us • Short short brown hair, thin glasses • Lake behind house • Mum and Dad! • At Gatorland • At squirrel paths • The sun is too hot Florida Two- More Gatorland Apr 8 P-20 D-15 • Same day • “Yes!” With Mom • Shows Dad and Mom lots • Steve Jenny Sarah susa • Feeds llama • Ian scared • At show Florida Three- Horror Movie Trailer Apr 8 P-20 D-15 • New day • Phil in Forrest green tee • We’re going exploring • In cap, Gatorland? • Orange yellow sunglasses • With Ian • Only? • Wading through Forrest and falling • ‘The trees have ears’ • “Probably gonna die out here” Florida Four-Old town, hair dye, strange dream Apr 9 P-20 D-15 • Old town is amusement park • Ferris wheel opening shot • Sky dive? • Red truck parade? • Hula dancer • At gift shop • Someone thrown from bull ride • Ride like wimpy kid movie • Rocky on tv • Pointing camera in mirror • Yellow tee with Florida • Baseball cap • Ian walks in- dared to dye his hair blonde • Black and white filter-blogs about dream • Checks himself out in camera hello • In my garden having picnic- room was glowing, ran over my video camera (he’s vlogging with) started to melt ran over- room started shaking big flash of light “oh god I’m going to die” then woke up in strange room got dragged out by man and Phil had red tattoo on arm. Man told him to get in line getting scanned green or red- shooting red people. Phil got green- he’s troop leader, got star. Blackness out window. In lecture room “welcome to new age of humanity” realest dream • Wants to go back • Sounds like Dan lol • Ian is ginger-y • Phil put in text it was ginger • Little giggle Alligator eats raccoon Apr 10 P-20 D-15 • Unlisted • Same yellow shirt? • Brownish long hair • Alligator in our garden- Liam • Jumped out of lake and ripped raccoon in half • Birds watching • In Florida House • Alligator flinging raccoon • Probably unlisted for violence Florida Five- Disney Mouse Ears April 10 P-20 D-15 • First shot in car • Orange tee shirt • Making faces • Drive through Disney gate • “Disney World” • Zooms on Ian • Walking to Epcot with parents and Ian in front of him • Orange shirt says dp haha my emotions • “I’ve put on this orange T-shirt to distract people from Ian’s hair” aww he’s so cute • “Cheers Phil” • The Seas with Nemo and Friends • Caption says ‘worst ride EVER’ aw :( • Ian says his experience is rubbish • In space ride? • ‘We got bored of America’ ‘so we went to Japan’ • Watching drum show • Koi pound • Phil in wizard hat • Ian in bob Marley Mickey ears • Phil in hatter hat • Ian in pirate hat • Phil in... spider hat??? • Mom in Minnie ears and Dad on top hat w/ ears lean in together • Holy cow all these hats • Finally settled on pirate • “We’ve become a family of mice” • “Are you filming?” “Yes” “ask me something” “phil?” “Yes?” “Do a micky Mouse impression • Idk what he says • ‘Oh my god’ • Wearing swim shorts • Attacking elephant statue • Meal of salt • Ian try’s to cut it • Fireworks display • Over lake??? • Showing obscure stuffed toys • Dinner noises in back Florida six- who is right?! April 11 P-20 D-15 • In green striped polo • Tan wall • Sitting in bed? • No hands so must be on tripod • Hi • Me and Ian didn’t agree on a lot of things on holiday- let us know who’s right • Mouths I’m right • This room really echos • What is size of platepus • Phil thinks it’s smaller • Different shirts • Phil green with star • Penguins (emperor) Ian-4 ft Phil-1ft • ‘I saw Davey ***?” ???? • Most haunted real? • Phil thinks fake • Phil likes Ian’s hair- Ian doesn’t • Phil’s shoes • Don’t even bring the shoes up • Ian hates them • “The best shoe ever” • Other than that we’ve got on this holiday • Phil punches Ian The tornado and the Comic Book April 30 P-20 D-15 • Opening shot of tornado white in yard • Just looks like dust • Sunny day • In a car • With Ian • Lol his blonde hair • Him and Ian making animal noise in car • Green and white baseball cap with diamond? • Wow I️ didn’t even notice how light his hair has gotten WOW • Written on paper “Ian is a liar you don’t need a gun to kill him” in all caps • Phil slashs paper across his neck • Denny’s • Orange world pass by • Celebration Ave • Driving • “I️ was the only survivor of the tornado encounter” • Tells Ian he’s supposed to be dead • “Sell my body to strangers on the street to make a living and maybe eat the occasional pigeon” • “This is my final broadcast, goodbye everyone it’s been fun” • 1974-1948-1963 • First bomb has hit New York • “Drive Sebastian DRIVE” @ his Dad Phil’s wilding lol • Rorr • Phil’s Dad says something • Someone’s being arrested lol • Steven Speilburg is on a cloud • “Give me your money or dragon will die” • ‘Dad told me to calm down’ written on screen wow it’s so weird to think of Phil as teen • Boring tv • Bites lip • About maths • Parents talking indisctiily • He gets it wrong and everyone laughs • His mom suggests two times table • I️ love his mom • • Alternative Muse Trailer- MEWS Sept 15 P-20 D-16 • Starts w toys • Narrator? Professional • “Coming soon the amazing new album from MEWS • Meowing Muse songs • Sounds kind Phil • Cuts to Phil and Ian in his bedroom meowing and laughing • Phil’s hair is p black again • Phil laughed • They kept laughing • “C’mon, meow- seriously” • There’s literally Buffy everywhere Phil is the real stalker here • Weird ceiling pattern • At home Christmas Monkey December 23 P-20 D-16 • Four people • Phil- hair black and shoulder length • Ian??? Or Pete • Girl in red with long aburn hair cat??? • Guy with duty blonde buzz cut • Ian in antlers • One word stories about monkey • “And-the-monkey-lived-happily-ever-dead” • Probs in dorm 2008 Coin of Destiny Jan 9 P-20 D-16 • Still stock cabin image with title written • Blonde guy??? • Holding duck • Knock at door • Pete comes in • “Hi Jake, tommy” • At dorm??? • In room ugh light blue walls and pool table and jaws poster • Nvm it’s Phil’s house • Coin- endless fortune or pain • Tosses it • At Phil’s house • Phil and someone??? • Stroking things plus noises • Welcome to year 3000 • Heads • “Lucky child” lol • Other guy on hall floor? • Idk him???? Latino looking • In tan room • Ian saves Jake • At gate of destiny • Blonde girl (don’t know???) • Welcome to the gate of eternal destiny • His hair is so long fml • Guy shows up to kill girl Ian saves her • Ben Dawson as Jake • Emily pepperday as gatekeeper • Mark hesketh • Stephan claxon • Danish Mahmood • Filmed at 3 am aww my B.B. • “I️ love you guys” I️ love you Phil Prague #1- Arrival Jan 13 P-20 D-16 • Opens on empty train platform outside • Three guys (or girl one w/ long hair) • “We’re just waiting for the train everyone’s a bit bored” • One guy is doing this dance thing and jumps into the other’s arms • Hangs down • Starts doing sit ups and makes a kissy noise • Guy hold him pretends to slap his face • Jumpcut to room • Guy w/ black long hair dancing • Steven • Omg Phil’s hair is down to shoulders • Pretty black • Wearing blue hoodie • Room is small • “Got our own bathroom so no sharing with scary men” • Likes painting on wall (rose) • Phil bonded with Andy on the plane • Ian • Little quiz for people at home • Andy or Phil? They are facing back • Andy is one w/ long black hair • Lion hate • Ian reading paradise bar card • Sexy women on it • Private dance, go go dance, lap dance • Whistle • Maybe he’ll visit Tomorrow • Describes day • Phil didn’t like English pub at first • Angie made the lion hat • Steven posed naked with lion hat over his crotch • Shows actual picture • Andys in bed Ian’s asleep • Slow mo jump • Everyone has own twin bed Prague #2- Exploring Jan 13 P-20 D-16 • Opens on town/city • We’re in old town square • Gothic towers • Really big Christmas tree • Astronomical clock • ‘Anticlimax’ in text as clock goes off • Going to top of tower • Phil looks like snape with a tan scarf lol • View from top • Tower has the highest suicide rate in Europe • Phil runs up to camera and says fascinating • Steven sniffing maniquen • Zoo on her head • Wow so pretty • Soldiers • Do a little skip • Harry and Hermione good graphite drawings from ootp • Picture slideshow • Show with clown dude 20 Days Mar 8 P-21 D-16 • Text ‘20 Days’ • Sped up • Math socks • Hair v long and black • Got to write 1000 words in 24 hours • Opens textbook and flops his face into it • At college? • Has hiccups • Someone films him flipping pancake • Shirts keep changing • Feather woman • Going in car wash at night • Hanging upside down • Had little blue haired figure ‘I don’t want to write another 2000 words’ • Matching couple going down stairs • Fiona- brown hair with bangs • And Seth • We’re going shopping together • Ill • W coffee • Lion • Outside in fenced in • Wow 20 Days went by fast • I️ think I️ need to start appreciating each day • What are you doing today? • Maybe..you should.. do something memorable • =] Zac Efron for President April 9 P-21 D-16 • Hello • Sea blue shirt • Weather channel saw his last video • Give us sunshine again • Andrew somethings video • He got jones soda • I’m unidentified place with white • It’s can • Angry • He’s in Florida • New tshirt • Went shopping during rain • Got matchy watch • A lizard climbed the tree outside didn’t film it • Badgeline • Zac efron for president • On button • Sea monkeys Katie sent • Ling ling painted lion • Wow this vid is so cringe lol AmericanPhil April 15 P-21 D-16 • Phil is doing American accent • Watching baseball and drinking Gatorade • Holy cow it sounds so weird • Oh it’s another dude speaking • I️ think? • Totally awesome The sliver button May 3 P-21 D-16 • I️n Florida still • Duvet in background • Shiny button on house plant • Somethings coming • Has scarf on head • Change in dimension • Black white now • 1000s of people all watching • I️ can see your eyes you’re all staring right back at me • Sock puppet • Not again • On flip phone • No orange button • Stop watching video • Fake crying • Selfish people • Sock eats him • Never be able to understand what you’ve just done • Entered vid in competition • *competitiom cancelled Sock perfection May 8 P-21 D-16 • Still in Florida • So excited • Are you ready for something exciting • Shoe sock • He’s so happy omg • Red striped shirt Stuff #3 May 25 P-21 D-16 • Text- ‘there was a folder on my computer called ‘stuff 3�� it contained 15 videos and one song’ • I️ challenged myself to make a montage in 10 minutes • Girl saying hello Philip and something about a flip • Dark blue room with guy in red sweatshirt walking away • Anja roaring • Someone in glassed in pool • Phil’s mum is filming • ‘It’s a video’ • Aw she’s so cute • Looks like pool from 2017 Florida trip with dan • They stay in same house! • Red sweatshirt guy ‘You’re editing this film not me’ • Phil in purple tee in front of bushes • Clip of Phil wearing watch • Family • At his dorm with Christmas tree • Clip of guy? • His giant Backyard • City? • I️ am sat on the floor DANGER! June 20 P-21 D-17 • Essay- got a 53% • Upset • Fiona’s Birthday- video • Ben’s Birthday • Booked place with sauna and stuff- recommends • Messy room- dorm?? • Hair is lots shorter • Slightly lighter? • Sped up footage of party • Shot glasses?!? • Girl and at least three guys • Standing in a kitchen • Singing happy birthday • Two girls- four guys • (5?) • Phil likes house • People playing twister • Swimming pool • Ping pong and pool table • Three people dancing on balcony • Girl squished her boobs • In swimsuit • The happening- thought it was going to be really cool • Didn’t like it too much- awkward • Nobody talks like that • Pops pink balloon with hands • Fake cries • Mom is from north- Dad from down south • Mix of two • *accents • Does north accent Curious Mico Aug 10 P-21 D-17 • Hair getting longer • Blue shirt • Orange and wears a tie question time with Mico • Has red guitar • Real? • I’m his brother’s room at moment • Martyn- sure he’s been in one of my videos before • Pic of martyn skateboarding • Weirdest thing in room- loud koala alarm clock • He has new has • Bell- rang it in shop and got shouted at • At the moment really likes mire cats • And polar bears • Marks cat • Cute laugh • 4 In morning about to go to bed • Look down and he stepping on Mouse • Cats are vicious killers • Superstition bc Mom • Fingernails, shoes • Don’t say “I️ hope you die on your birthday” • Makes weird noises • And it noises people • Footage breaks down • “Rest in peace Mico” Dude, an amazing forest hurricane! Oct 5 P-21 D-17 • Other people • Wearing shirt from profile omg first one I️ recognized • Three people- two guys and girl- all long brown hair • Zebra • “We call a zeebra a zebra” “REALLY?””Yes, you were wrong” • Holy cow the girl looks/sounds kinda like Cat (caterific) • Central Park • Doing story • Umbrella • We’re in New York • In band • John • Space exhibition- which was boring • Snacks- discussing biscuits • Abbry • Nvm two girls • At natures museum • It’s a squirrel pig • Re: The BEST advice Oct 27 P-21 D-17 • Close up on face • Purple shirt • ‘Hi andrew’ • ‘My name’s Phil, I’m from England’ • We say the word like this • SORRY • Growls 2009 AmazingPhil Big Brother Audition Jan 13 P-21 D-17 • At home- in his bedroom • Wearing cat whiskers • Omg • Hi- meow • My name’s Phil I’m a boy and I️ make video diaries on YouTube • Jumpcut to lobster • Bare chested- towel tied around shoulders • I’ll join the gym at university • “And then I’ll be irresistible” • God he’s hot • Christmas vacation • Feels need to tone myself • Used to talking into camera • Likes lions • Like these shoes • Like these boxers- musical note ones (Dan has worn them fml) • Doesn’t want to be put with annoying famous people • “So please pick me” • “And I️ will give you a kiss on the face” SNOW April 29 P-22 D-17 • Snow filter • Animals noises • Red shirt • Just making faces ☠️ April 30 P- 22 D-17 • Purple ish footer • Amazing eyes • I️ can hear a noise • I️ can hear someone coming closer and closer to my room • Filter switches • Puts string in mouth • Screams with beep • Pretends to die Bradley Sept 22 P- 22 D-18 • Been really long time since video • Doing American accent • Get naked • BW shirtless jumpcut • Lessamazingphil everyday • Went to wales • Thought he was was going to get serial killered • They were driving • Moving ball of fluff • With friends • Badger • Never seen badger • Badger through itself in front of car • Killed it • Haunted by badger and ferret • Bought glasses today • Called Seth • Checker shirt change • Actually blind • Bradley gave eyetest • Eyelid rape • American cup • Lol it’s a yellow solo cup • Going back to Florida in April • Parents want to get house there • Used to this face • Twice a year in flordia • Writes “a really freaky woman has moved in” • “Hello, I️ will be here for two weeks” • Writes- ‘she keeps her butter in the cupboard • Moving out on Wednesday • Moving back to Manchester forever • So he’s still at uni rn • Going to become a man • Love you all a lot • Battery died • Lion and lioness • Green grapes Flashing Images Sept 25 P-22 D-19 • Text ‘this video contains flashing imagines’ • Flashing images set to music • Most seemed to be filmed at his home • Guy walking down street • Cards • Calculator • Notebook • Buffy on tv • Inverted colors • Pill • 8 ball • Young Phil? • Screen splits several times • Hands with oilers, hourglass, smashing, knife • All footage is ten years old OHHH (1999) I️ like fire and petrol Nov 5 POST 10/19/09!!! P-22 D-23 • In room at house • Got hit by firework as child • Stupid friend called Katie • Picked up unused fireworks and put them in fire • Afraid of fireworks now • Love smell of bonfires • Weird • Aftershave would wear • Fireworks and scooters direct- shop in his town • Now we can ride the scooter to the fireworks display • Back roll OMG • Got purple face mask in P.O. box • Thanks • House made weird noise • Mattress on side?? • American candy- livesavers • Smell • Mickey Mouse boxers • Medium so rly big • Parents said if you don’t have job by November kicking you into the street • Actually just advised him • Haven’t done • Not sure what he’ll be • Brain heart surgeon • Physic? • Now kiss me • Vet • Tatoo artist (only face whiskers) • Lion tamer • Long tongue • History folder- doodles • Didn’t care for history • The final quack • Apartment red filming in Ireland • Woman at airport made him cry • Lioness is pregnant • ‘But you only licked my chin’ • The were on laptop keyboard • W/ Stephan • Apple computer • Set • Wearing suit w/ purple tie • Fake cuts off head • HICKEY on his left between shoulders and neck • Dan was last with him nov 1 • 5-10 Days ago Dreams of the future Nov 22 P-22 D-18 • Meows • Sorry I️ haven’t been around much • Hair down to ears • Wearing jacket he wore for Halloween • Life has been crazy • Cutest face now • Entered video into contest • Dan’s in the competition • Cut to Pinof • Dan saying ‘should I️ have a sex change’ • After you vote for me pleaseeee could you vote for him as well? • Cleans screen • Double screen • Takes photo • Idk if I️ told you but you look really beautiful today • Talk to past • 2047 • Dino dream • We all sleep in xxx chambers • Robots everywhere • When I️ like something it makes me do this *shirt sparkles* • Blue polo ish shirt btw • Not actually human • Show you inside of my head • Cut to flashing images video • Gives me ability to travel trough time • Red- he’s not who he says he I️s • Colors invert • Music kicks in • Travel into past and warn you • I️ have been on this planet for thousands of years • 2047 • Red shirt (with sharpie streaks) no shirt • He has your soul now • I️ warned you to stop watching • End of our story • Like dreams not all stories have a happy ending • Wraps up glove in Black • Going to return to my mind now • I️ want to wake up • His eye Captain stress relief December 5 P-22 D-18 • Stop motion w/ lion • For giffgaff • Mobile network • 18th time filming • Lion hasn’t been talking to him • Guy in bubble wrap • Captain stress relief • Have a cheeky pop and relax • Popping medley • I️ don’t see this as a job I️ see this as my life • At Phil’s house • So high up • Wearing cat sweatshirt/jacket • Another dude in phils living room Have a bear exam coming up • Mom • I’m so stressed with all this cooking • In kitchen • Giffgaff to hire (V DAY VIDEO- FEB 13- P-23 D-18) My fish died :( Mar 1 P-23 D-18 • Bed made • SAME SHIRT AS VDAY • SAYS ARFF OK YHEN • jackienchan • Dad displayed fish body outside conservatory window • We need to mourn him Phillip • 100,000 subscribers • Self conscious • Clip of HI IAM PHIL WELCUM TO MAH FIRST VIDEO BLOG • shudders • Imagine if you all were in the room with me • We’d probably die • Didn’t know peeps • Karen sent him peeps • Christmas trees • Very sugary • Very nice • 6 1/2/ 7 • He and dan tried making American pancakes • Cut to clip of them • Clip of it snowing • In orange room now • Today’s draw Phil Naked • Him riding a cow in space • Mating call of camel • ‘Hey do you want to head up to the bedroom..’ • Prize time • My soul • Boxers • He and Dan semi finalist • In video contest • Halloween’s mirror self of them OHai Mar 30 P-23 D-18 • Purple graphic tee • Cat whiskers • Close to camera • In bedroom • Haven’t made video here since Christmas • Say hello • Going on boat tomorrow to Isle of Man • Isn’t most exciting place • Buy ds and Pokemon to play • Hasn’t played Pokemon since Pokemon Silver • Asleep and kept hearing door bell in dream • Actual doorbell • Ran downstairs • Was excited for big package • Pokemon platinum • Game is small compared to old box • Can’t play bc no ds • Plays with slinky • Thanks everyone who helped by watching captain stress relief • But DANIEL • (Danisnotonfire) • He’s in Twitter part of contest • Help dan out • Giving away crazy prizes • Yawn • Going to bed at odd times • Doesn’t know how he coped when he went to Australia • Do you like these videos? • I️ will appear in your bedroom BOAT APOCALYPSE Apr 14 P-23 D-18 • In room but sitting at Pinof angle • Back from Isle of Man • Black polo • Hope the Easter bunny was kind • Never want to see white choclate ever again • ‘It’s your favorite’ • Had couple of Easter eggs before going on boat • People suck everywhere • Didn’t throw up • Dana gave him Easter egg • Real bird egg filled with chocolate • Looking at apartments in Manchester • Want to get one with really high skyscraper • Pretend everything is mine • Creepy guy breathing in his ear on bus • Don’t like people breathing in his ear • Got red photo camera • Penguin mating call • Ds arrived • Shows other side of his room • Big lion on chair • Draw Phil Naked • Him on a unicorn • Starts singing always I️ want to be with you • Apartment red • He and Steven • Lion family Swine Flu May 6 P-23 D-18 • V day shirt • Not in room • Feel like you and me should be pillow fighting in slow motion in our underwear • Thatd be hot • Tried to make video outside • Think he’s in Florida • Mosquito down his shirt • In geeze? Bottom corner of Florida • 8 hours to get there • Only eating trail mix • Too sacred to go into sea- idk why I️ developed sea phobia • Snake or alligator • Sea panther lurking • Bought grow your own aquarium • Only thing I️ shop that not shell • Shell jigsaw • Hammock jumpcut • He has swine flu • Guy with green t shirt on plane coughed • It’s been 3 weeks • Got sonic boxers • Fish in house • Pinof 2 • Own tv show on apartment red PRIZES July 8 P-23 D- 18 • Crawling forward on bed • Lion tee shirt • Patch beard • Facial hair grows weirdly • Nvm not lion shirt but black • So this video is about PRIZES • We the Kings day in the life • Announcing winners • Sending postcards to address • Permission to scrape out his eyeballs • Phil I️D.C. About contest • Something exciting in September • Clip on repeat EEE • Only good things can come out of a Moomin box Viewer Mail! Louder! Aug 30 P-23 D- 19 (As I️t is exactly same as listed video, no notes) SUPERNOTE 2010 Oct 4 P-23 D- 19 • Omg Dan is here • In new apartment • On black couch in front of microwave • Dan wearing red sweatpants and has bracelets • Phil in blue polo and black jeans? • Readyness face • Making mouth movements at each other • Big breath in • Dan counts down on fingers • Singing notes • Contest • Dan has v relaxed face • He lasts 42 seconds • Phil lasts 52 • D “holy crap what the fuck, freak” • Dan makes squawk noise • Wave goodbye • Dan starts again and Phil shoved his face • Screams in Phil’s ear • Dan and Phil get down! Oct 30 P-23 D- 19 • Dan fake playing video game • Phil sitting behind him • Dan wearing twilight shirt • Phil in yellow shirt • I️ heard if you say this thing 3 times into a mirror something scary happens • Dan replies sarcastically ‘ooh what is that then?’ • Bleeding llama dance party • No summos ancient Japanese wolf demon • Please it’s Halloween • Phil groans and gets up and goes to bathroom • Starts to say I️t • “Phil no think about this for a moment” • Scary imagines flash • Dan and Phil standing in front of balcony doors • Dan is taller than Phil omg • Stop motion • Dancing • Cycle • Phil eventually puts on wolf mask and mauls dan • Runs to camera • Happy Halloween • End screen 2011 Has WINNERS Mar 5 P-24 D- 19 • Dan and Phil • Terrible sound • In new apartment • Phil in red tee Dan in grey sweater and llama hat • Half full Ribena in back • Co judge: dan... the llama • Emotional piano music • All so good • I️ wish I️ was creative • D- so was I️ • Rachel triops queen and three year old daughter • Dan thinks they’re gross Phil likes them • Bonus chance for Simon • Dan does little swaying dance • Runners up • Dan will make sure Phil contacts people • Salad fingers character • But good • Dan likes text • Girl we met my chemical romance • With pink hair • Dan rolls eyes at Phil giving career advice • Jumpcut after dan plays with balls • 7 evil ex’s- dan is Ramon of flowers??? • Dan rawring at Phil • Dan should be art teacher • Dan says he should be everything teacher • Final fantasy character • Phil grabs Dan’s face when he’s annoyed • Don’t grab my face • ‘Personal bubble’ • Rude • Dan playing with bracelet • Secret unlisted video • Llama head butt • Don’t know how to stop camera Totoro Winners! June 5 P-24 D-19 • Phil wearing purple New York shirt • Dan wearing grey sweater • Terrified dan • Giraffe scared Dan • Not just creativity • Whisk face giraffe • Hard choosing • Goat • Dan scared of giraffes forever • Michael eagle washing machine • All these get small rotor is • Giraffe pocky • Wonder why Phil likes I️t • Hippo ice cream • Phil wants to eat I️t • Mural on side of his house of octo sloth • Dan likes spaghetti panther the best • Sitting on left side of tv • Tv is on • Fair amount of Knick knacks • Unbridge on unicorn • Fair amount of jump cuts • Phil just finished portal • Dan calls for taxi?? • Ultimate winners • Someone calls dan • Hello? Hello? • Jump cut he’s not on phone anymore • Phil loves disturbing • Dan says we a lot • Dan goes to get his taxi • Twerks in camera • Phil says no • Gives rec for vid • Unidentifiable song find I️t Speaking fail Aug 10 P-24 D-20 • He’s going to be doing an official apartment tour on his channel • Over and over • Red button up plaid • In bedroom • Keeps messing up DOG-A-LIKES! Oct 7 P-24 D-20 • Last day before Florida • Dan can’t fit in fride • Heat wave • Dan’s butt after heat wave • What dog is each person • Phil • Dan • Peej • Lion • Charlie • Chris • Idk why I️t made Chris so fat • Phil and Buffy baby • Phil and pikechu baby • Cookies and cream straw • In tv room • Drinks milk • Check out vyou • Clip of Phil eating after camera stopped • Bonus Phil mail 3.5 December 6 P-24 D-20 • In bedroom on side of bed • Lots of stuff • Camera and IMovie lost his footage • Red shirt • Jade sent him letter with draws (and cat whiskers) • Red panda stamps • Phil can’t wink • Wearing shorts • Heart hands • Timothy get downstairs right now • Going to read story in bed tonight • Likes to read before bed • Pocky • Promises he reads all letters • Final fantasy music? • Thank you for the sexy story as well... • Fake eyelashes maybe for philippa PROJECT FOR AWESOME 2011! somewhereto_ Dec 17 P-24 D-20 • Eating out of advent Callander • Sitting in chair in front of tv • Christmas tree up • Sonic shirt • Juggling polar bears • Walking down street • Omg this is where the cuts where he swears come from • Looks like mike from stranger things lol • Helps find people find space to do things • Draw Phil Naked • Snowed today • Dan saying it’s a blizzard harry in background 2012 LETTERZ Jan 25 P-24 D-20 • Sitting on bed longways • New covers • Jacob mask • Wearing blue orange and white bracelets- silly bands? • Wearing tie • Indigo shirt • Jesus stamps • Watching you since 2009 • I️dead to prank dan • Hide alarm clock in his room- that’s a good one • Working on that • I️ went cross eyed for you I️ love you that much • And now even moar • Red curtain • Now In living room • Sitting at breakfast bar • You should visit Canada someday • Likes the name Hope • Cara lee is a cool name • Wearing lion hat • ‘I’m sorry don’t stop watching the video because I️ did that’ • 8 years old viewer • WHOLLY SHIT ITS TIFAS THEME • SHITTTTTYTTT • shirt change • Doesn’t like colored pencils FANK YOU Jan 30 P-25 D-20 • Not at home • At parents house? • Grey plaid shirt • Bday thank you • Had a really nice day • Guinea pig • Mom made him cactus garden • Mapless chocolates • Shaver bc his broke and stubble growing • Didn’t know what to ask for for his bday • Sexy socks • Chocolate tasting club • Dad wrote ‘have a nice birthday or ill eat your liver’ • Spiked himself on cactus • Final destination • Go to bed • Should do updates more • Mysterious news AmazingPhil Next Vlogger May 6 P-25 D-20 • Jacob mask • Kill Bill poster above his bed now • My name’s Phil and I’m known as AmazingPhil on YouTube • From Manchester England • Vlogs, comedy sketches, interactive vid, and lions? • Loves interacting with people all across the world the most • In future wants to keep doing what he’s doing • Get better at editting • More interactive • Life vlogging • Juggles apples • Yeah I️ can’t juggle But what’s the catch!? May 23 P-25 D-20 • In another dudes house? • With Alex Day • London • Says London accent • Offers with price • 5 million will you shave off all body hair forever • Phil would for month or year • That’s mental no • Phil would for a billion • Saturday • Lose laugh or read minds • Phil seems flirty • Draw time • Bored on train Phil wrote these QUESTIONS! and a pickled shark Sept 10 P-25 D-21 • London apartment !!! • Side channel vid • Pinof 4 tomorrow filmed • Need questions • Usually uses formspring • In room? • Shark HO HO HO Dec 25 P-25 D-21 • At parents house • Tan room on couch • Take break from eating to wish happy Christmas • Puts on antler • HIS BEDROOM IS TAN • Not couch bed • Tetris alarm clock • At 6:30 when filming • Or is that his alarm??? • Dog puppet • Radio 1 website • 9 pm • Working on show all of December • Interacting on bb1 twitter • Going to eat and go into food coma • Goodbye guys oh dear • DAN IN RELFEVTIOM OF ALARM on computer • Ewatching? • Or Phil’s background 2013 HAIR MODEL! May 7 P-26 D-21 • Deleted • Finally feeling like summer • Mouse situation • Mouse in our house • Mouse cam • Their tv • Time to get cat • Weird woman • Hand first • Would you like to be a hair model • Different hair styles • Nial mask • Homeless guy saying I️ wonder who would win in a fight between you two • Phil wins • Lemon phone case • Jack Howard is avoiding haircut • Asking phone genie • Who in avengers? • C’mon Thor (Phil is so gay for him) • Black widow twins • Mcr in background • Names all Tom • Knows his middle name • Mum uses full name when he’s in trouble • Why is there a dying rabbit on my bed • I️ May tell u about someday • Interrupt this video for announcement • Danni boi jumps in (literally) • You just broke my bed • Radio Show nominated for award • People’s choice • London edition Ditl if they win • Grandma and dog vote • Phil was wearing pj bottoms while Time 2014 Dan and Phil LICK RACE June 16 P-27 D-23 • Sky shirt • Dan in horn hoodie • Usual spam emails • Hello Phil from Oreo • Lick race • Free double stuff Oreos • Nice angle • No teeth just tongue • Need a dispute to settle • Mail button • Phil is heavy sleeper • Ah domestic • Not answer door from more • But wait there’s more • Loser face decorated • Dan takes hello kitty mug • Dan has powerful younger • Phil sliding I️t over tongue • Dan slow powerful licks • Work out • So good at ice lollies now • Dan wins • Dan draws lick off • Sprays Phil’s hair • Ok I’m to go now • Dan licks camera Welcome! Sep 8 P-27 D-23 • White background • Probs in house • Wearing dan and Phil T-shirt’s • Dan in black and Phil in purple • Dan and Phil • Official worldwide dan and Phil shop • Posters • Llama and lion • Stationary sets • Dans ear 7cm long • Please stop that • Up there somewhere • Newsletter • Thanks for supporting • Phil’s heart hurts • Get that checked out • Should we go make some videos • Or eat • Dan laughs at the end god that was awkward Thank you! Sep 8 P-27 D-23 • Same setting as last • Dan- hello valued customers • If you’re watching this means you bought something • Or someone just sent you link • Phil hugs camera • To late now they just should enjoy the embrace • Go before • Super cringe sPOOPy Nov 5 P-27 D-23 • Darkness and flashing • Flashlight • 1D poster • Close up on Nial • Phil ‘rahhh’ • Sitting on toilet probs The Dan and Phil ADVENT CALENDAR Nov 17 P-27 D-23 • In gaming room • Phil in Jake sweatshirt • Dan in black T-shirt • Hello disciples of the Dan and Phil newsletter • No • We’re calling them that it’s my turn • So much worse than buddies • Didn’t know if we were going to do this if not • Hilarious • Phil wanted to • Bigger than looks on camera • Dan has big head • Had chocolate tasting • Strange moaning noises • Photo booth challenge behind each • Chocking on chocolate • Americans don’t have • Another joint • All get a bit fat together • Yayyy CHRISTMAS MERCH!! Dec 5 P-27 D-23 • In Christmas jumpers worn in dirl • Hello Christmas elves • Missed opportunity to say ho ho hello • Live in same • Follow newsletter • Do I️t • Please • Please • Working for long time • Best thing ever made • Calendar • Don’t spoil I️t • Customized dates • Twiiter plans • Pixal t shirt • Phil likes galaxy coat • Dan likes dinosaur • And Phil’s Pizza tshirt • Dan should put I️t on • Dan says not to look • Don’t want you to see my nipples • Phil covers his eyes • Phil sings sexy music • Dan thinks it’s cool • Dan is smiling to much too fake • Wrapping paper • Gift card • Dan doesn’t trust relatives • Put lot of love • Festive make over • Lots of gaming videos • Ho ho ho Phil closes in on camera Christmas one word story game! Dec 17 P-27 D-23 • Sitting on gaming couch • Dan in Santa hat and earrings and black Santa sweater • Phil in reindeer and purplish patterned sweater • Reindeers don’t say ho ho ho • Ahhh • Greetings and ah • Man named Jerome who killed Santa and wore his skin while visiting children • That was terrible idea HAPPY NEW YEAR! Dec 17 P-27 D-23 • Bonus video • In gaming room • Jellyfish tee • Dan in black • Purple Pokemon pillow • Merry eve • Phil what was your favorite thing of 2014 • Meeting Kylie benoge • Hanging out • Amazing video • Australian slang • Worst thing- • Either being stuck on rollercoaster or squirrel • Dan smiling • Best • Nick jonas hug • Body warmth • Worst • Buying leather t shirt • Regrets • Enjoy hanging out with robots and hover cars in future • Both give thumbs up 2015 ZZZZ Jan 28 P-27 D-23 • In gaming room • Door open • In gaming room • Pikacu pillow and green one • Phil in logos shirt • Dan in black tee • Dan does double peace signs in opening • Phil does single wave • That was weird • Dan and Phil sim buddies • Do something for people who have trouble sleeping • We both stay up too late on the internet • Like miles or owls • Bedtime story game • Ahh • Filter • One night in florist land there was a little squirrel called Herbert. Herbert’s face was swollen bc he licked a bee Herbert is sad bc of his face as he won’t be able to ask Susan to prom remember that faces are not important and dogs are loyal • THAT WAS GOING SOMEWHERE • ALL YOU HAD TO SAYIS WHATS INSIDE COUNTS AND YOU SAID DOGS • Dan is wild • Why are you wearing pyjamas • Bc it’s bedtime • Phil walks away • What a disaster • Sorry Ring Ring Roulette 2! Feb 15 P-28 D-23 • In gaming room at an angle • Phil in gray space shirt • Dan in alien shirt • Hello dan and Phil games sims buddies • Awkward • Need to stop that • Randomly call people using • Using our dan and Phil sim • Mailbox you have called not available • Hello? • Is this mainly? • Starts crying • Oh my fuck • Hi this is Dan and Phil • I’m amazed • How long have you watch vids? • *gargled answer • Dan would win in fight to death • Do you have any pets • Cat called salemgaylord something • Dan likes lazy fat cats • Phil would like a unicorn • Give us best unicorn impression • Lovely to speak to you • Thanks for getting out Dan and Phil sim • This has been amazing thank you • Both wave to phone • Dan mirroring Phil THANKS! Mar 2 P-28 D-23 • In gaming room • Poke ball and crash bandicoot pillow • Phil in owl sweater • Dan in black shirt and grey hoodie • Touching • Hello sim buddies • Wanted to make video to say thank you on sim adventure • Controlling our lives- pic of running • Sneaking things into our tweets • Phil tweet- “some days you just feel like a moist diplodocus. Put on a snazzy outfit, go to the zoo and have a feelsposion over a capybara.” • Finally getting Dan to change his icon • Cat whisker and eclipse shirt • Yep that finally happened • Dan found I️t fun • Dan senses you all strange texts • Won’t randomly call you... for now • Phil summerize this entire thing with one noise • Brleee! • Beautiful ^_^ Mar 12 P-28 D-23 • In gaming room at weird angle • Dan in Eye shirt • Phil in some graphic tee (white) • Hello sim buddies • Night (completely dark) • We’re waiting and we’re ready • Sounded creepy • Randomly dialing • Dan had huge ass smile on his face • Not available • Sh sh • LAUREN • Hello? • Um yes • This is Dan and Phil • Oh hi • Answer I️ wanted to hear • Refreshing for like hours • Do you have any pets • Dog called chip • Cross terrier • Do any tricks • Jump cut • Probably a cat • Nothing more exotic? • Bearded dragon not baby dragon • Impression • Phil does impressions • 11/10 • Hello internet • Phil waves at phone again • Lauren was nice • Asking people to do phone impressions isn’t good etiquette • Phil asks Dan to do impression and he does aww |||RRR||| Apr 1 P-28 D-23 • Even weirder angle in gaming room??? • Dan in skull shirt and Phil in red plaid • Hair is flipped ohhhhh • “Are we not going to call them dan and Phil sim buddies this time?” • Sim friends • Mobile isn’t available • On toilet or something • Man’s voice • Is this Chloe • Not your sim • Man’s voice • Unicorn impressing • Barry • Thanks Barry • That wasn’t Chloe... • Nicole • This is Dan and Phil • I’m just sat down • No just sitting • Have a snake • Bella • Hiss • Since 2010 watched videos • The Pinofs are favourites • Happily sitting • She’s so chill • Hello internet • Phil wants a snake • Didn’t wave • Dan in blue dining room chair DAN AND PHIL SHOP ‘END OF SUMMER/CLASS IS STARTING AGAIN AHHH’ COLLECTION Aug 22 P-28 D-24 • Pixal fade in • Crash and flappy bird pillows • Dan in b tee w pocket lion • Phil in mint green lion pocket • Hot new season • End of summer/class is staring again season • Such a long time • Lllama lion t shirt • Rubbing my boob • Text ‘wow it’s like a little trip to 2011’ • Debuted piece of jewelry • Whiskers necklace • Phil wears I️t • Put I️t over face and look like u have whiskers • How amazing is that • Collabed with spiral backpacks • Pixal and Galaxy • Phil will use galaxy • Worked rly hard • Bye • Pixal fade Dan and Phil Merch EXPLOSION 💥 Nov 18 P-28 D-24 • In gaming room • Dan in fringe sweater • Phil in tour t shirt • Flappy bird and crash pillow • Dan’s voice bad bc tour • Attack on Titan Phil sings • Most merch ever • V busy this year • This guy • Dan does dance • Phil wants explosives makes dan edit • Rolls eyes • Didn’t know it’s coming • 2016 Calender • Work Calander • Strippers • January sailors • So sorry • Phil’s fav aug • Fireman • Police is most suggestive • Photos regret • Sweater is by artist • Black tee • Prodigy and 5 secs of summer • Tours on back • Tour tee • New poster • Next chapter • Advent calander • Good chocolate • Festive morphs • Wait for each day • Thanks to Martyn • Newsletter • Hope you’re having a fab day 2016 New Merch! CALENDERS AND SPACE! Nov 18 P-29 D-25 • Both in galaxy merch • Dan sweater • Phil tee • Gaming • Crash pillow and flappy • Boy do we have a thing for you • Sit down • 2017 calander • At movies • Dan likes marvel January • Phil looks better than Chris • That’s bold • If you worked out.. • Phil jumped for hogwarts • Sorry for sherk July • Stare at us all the time • New galaxy merch • Dan likes design • Dark space • No ugly dan and Phil anywhere • Darker back pack • So many secret flaps • Shame is strong • I️ don’t want your head on my boobs • Crime against Christmas • The big C • Snapchat filter dan and Phil • You sneaky lil shits have I️t don’t deny • Horrifying • All out now • It’s cool if you don’t • Newsletter • First spamming in comments section • B b b B.B. bye • — — — — - Dan — — — 2006 Bower’s Castle Highscore B Dec 28 P-19 D-15 • On Dan’s MySpace • In living room • Yellow walls • Red carpet • On May • Fire place • Big old tv in corner • Starts w him walking on mat • Black socks and some sort of black sweatpants • V blurry • Black shirt • Ddr • Looks shorter • Uh let’s see • Ooh • Six misses only six • High score see 2009 Did you order some sex? Nov 3 P-22 D-18 • Wow link was broken • Same angle as hello internet • Tv with drawers • Shirt or something on top • Body bag still hanging from door • Hey everybody • Excited voice • YouTube actually removed for shocking images • Penis 3 ft long flowing blue • Rectal exams are so saintly • Text ARE YOU SRS • rant • New angle • Hair almost looks black • Sitting • Black long sleeve v neck w/ leaves? • Vloggy break from professional normal videos • Back from Halloween gathering • Met lots of people made friends • Got far too drunk *small laugh* • Looking down • This internet thing is crazy • New angle • White pants • Pulling them down • Blue underwear • Sorry didn’t make this vid yesterday • Tree fell on train tracks and he was standing there for ages • Your free socks are in the mail rn (butterfingers subscribers) • Bc that’s what I️t said- SOCKS • not secks • What kinda pervert would say that • Side note • How do you mail sex to somebody • Knocking on window • In mask and hood • Window door • White • Uh hi ups • Why you at the Back door • Free sex right to this house • BEND OVER • Looks at camera • Clip of him zooming in on screen with text ‘it’s over 5000!!’ • *dies* • Look what you did! • I’m going to get a not shit camera • You piece of crap (camera) • All see my hidious face in high quality *groan* • Follow me on twitter for interesting things I️ did • Woke up • Eating toast • Making orange squash • Kitchen is mess • So having a crap • Red underwear • Tmi • Dailybooth for naked photos • Has princess ketchup and kittens unrest • Stick finger YouTuber eating Google’s ass • Pure and innocent soul • Lazy Belemic • Smile • 10 points if you get that joke • So many jumpcuts • Proper video with tassels and everything • Heart hands I️ PUNCHED A BEAR IN THE FACE P-22 D-18 • Same angle but sitting • Hey guys • White ball by drawers • Joker tshirt • Echoy • Me and Amazing Phil in competition on clipstar.com • Votes money as prize • Amazing subscribers • Vote for me • Says via like vIa • Might not even have weekend job in few weeks • If he wins will buy camera • Committed to YouTube • Yellow carpet • Lexis videos • 90% so my audience is female • Doesn’t matter • I️t doesn’t matter if you’re 12 call me • Wink • Insecure • Radiating masculinity • Get back male audience • Puts on flannel • Manly cracked shirt and ginger facial hair • Man things • Beer out of special beer glass that’s not my dads • Eating raw meat • Biting Deer • Watches the football • Camping other week • Loincloth and pointy stick • Puts on bear costume • I’ll nut ya • Sigh • I️ don’t think this is working • Stick to sarcasm and humiliating myself What did YOU get for Christmas? Dec 25 P-22 D-18 • In room with Christmas blanket • Gradient small tree • Wrapping paper • Waking up • ITS CHRISTMAS AHHH EEEEE • not one of those people who hates Christmas bc I’m rly cool • Love Christmas • Fav day • Divine advent calander • Religious • Glory to god in highest etc • Inflict Christianity on me • Actually potrey Jesus family from Middle East • Not white • You to post video respond • Portal to Christmas memories • B/w jumpcut in muchdash • I️ got a *miidle finger* kill yourself f*ggot • Got- pants, socks • Truffle chocolates • Maltesers ‘so beautiful’ • Indoor fireworks • Evil laugh • Orange M.D. more chocolate? • Movie ‘Australia’??? • Loves I️t • Bailey alcohol • ‘Goodbye liver’ • Lol Christmas jumper • Shit ones • One solution puzzle? • Shirt grey • Book • Plaid pants • Sorry Mom never buy clothes for me • Twilight • Get out • Pretty awesome • Kill Bill- fav movie ever • Money • PHILS TOY • Goddam tonbury! • Hugs camera 2010 hi there Feb 27 P-23 D-18 • Holy fuck he’s in India • Birds in the background • OMGOMGOMG • Red t shirt • Towels over raining • Blue wall • Channel is danisnotintresting • All 8 hundred and something of you you super sneaky detectives • Am in middle of holiday in India • Palm trees and animals • Not horrible winterness I️ left behind • Drum • Hotel-PRESA di GOA • Bedroom- white sheets, dark, posts w curtains • WiFi • People talking in background during WiFi clip • Shirtless filming in mirror • Bathroom lighting is attractive • Breakfast area- outside grass hut roof things and chairs and tables • Swimming pool • Lagoon color surrounded by trees and some pool chairs- empty • Actual hut house things • Stone monkey on roof • Gardener watering plants • Black dog • India’s pretty cool • Nice and hot • Nice to wear shorts again • View from airplane • Back in UK now • Now can make more vids • See you all soon • *kiss* muah Aeroplane Adventures- with danisnotonfire Feb 28 P-23 D-18 • Unlisted but Danni BOI has made I️t unavailable I️t looks like • Ralph Lauren polo • Vlogging in mirror on plane • Hello and welcome to aeroplane bathroom adventures with Dan • Snuck into first class toilets • Lots of stuff • Giant • Airplane toilets scare him • Create black hole in room • Flushing toilet Uncle Ken Apr 14 P-23 D-18 • Note- unlisted for being generally awful but I️ won’t private I️t for archeological reasons (wtf does that mean?!?) • In grey sweater vest thingy • Better quality • Only the yellow wall as background • Just blog for first time- for many reasons • Wants to talk • Looks white • Where is his channel going • Style • Suck at posting regularly • Worst at doing anything • Idea sheet • Has to be five minutes epic • Twilights last • Video everyday in April • Considering I️t doing • Checking websites till dinner • Playing rock band till he goes to sleep • Singing bad romance • Maybe in aug • Going to Portugal with Phil in few days • Expect vid • In Manchester for next week • Mom got log cabin for garden • Outdoor shot • Lots of trees • Path to cabin • Staying at grandparents overnight • Weird shuffling noises outdoor • Door freaking open • Gown standing in doorway • Uncle was watching tv downstairs • Pretends to be sleep • 3 minutes I️t watches him • Rape me in sleep • I️t left after watching grandparents • He • Come upstairs now to uncle • Oh that’s uncle Ken • Relative of yours you haven’t met from up north • Dementia • Comment below • Had nice Easter • Bye bye LETS HAVE A QUICKIE Apr 30 P-23 D-18 • Black tee • Sitting on side of his bed • Waredrobe • Quickie vid • Interactive truth or dare next vid • 2nd channel suggests • Pick most entertaining • Some things that I️ wouldn’t pic • Not doing naked handstand on motorway • Oww... • Chocolate • Birds outside • Returning to dailybooth • Neglected I️t for last three months • Sign up • Fav online community • Phil stuffy ‘prized!’ • LucyX won peace of hair • Won competition for gimp • Shout out Phil for no dance vid • He was lazy • Shot Pinof 2 • Omm nom nom nom • Bloopers • Shut up at helicopters outside E3 2010! L.A. Vlog June 17 P-23 D-19 • In hotel • With Phil • In grey graphic tee • Phil in l blue polo • First few days for trip to La • Phil forgot they went to Disneyland • How could you forget we went to Disneyland • (Day 1) • Clip of coaster • Space mountain was awesome • Met American friends • More friendly than English people • Toy story 3 tournament • Is really good • Phil seems kinda out of I️t • Tron bags • Clip at Disney • Dan ‘tron bagssss’ • Someone legend of Zelda t shirt • Molly • Has tron bag • Blonde • Might wear I️t every day • Phil in purple • Dan in vest and twilights last • Phil is on light bike • World of color thing • Mufasa dies nvm rainbow • Going to make him remember • Segway tour • Venice beach tour • Dan loved I️t • Why don’t you get bike • Cut to shots • With blonde girl and dude • Dan segwayed wo hands • Pj? • Qued waiting for cirque de sol • Weird shoulder pads robes • Jump cut • Crazy • Kinect • Phil got to see press conference • Tonight get to see you story 3 • Best week ever • Funky playing around that wave been doing • Peace sign and three finger • Small world about to have soil ruptured • Phil roars SELF MUTILATION Jul 18 P-23 D-19 • In room on bed? • Grey patterned ish shirt • Worst habit • Suit on door • Cuts to him throwing off leopard print underwear and stabbing his dick • Wearing llama shirt in jumpcut • Leave spot on face alone • Dan has to remove I️t • Tiny red spot on face • I’ll just v subtly • Black screen screaming • *five minutes later* text on screen • Condiments and beef jerky on face • Over jumpcut with joker shirt • Going out tonight don’t want anyone to see • Side eyes • Add so reasons why Dan’s a fail • PO box • Danisnotonfire PO box 3612 Workingham RG40 9JL • England • Ik my subscribers • Don’t actually send me dead babies or underwear • Rawr argblarbleawblrwarblgablrbleweblbll Jul 26 P-23 D-19 • holy fuck Jamaica • ITS THAT ONE CLIP • plays with hair- look- wave- holds nose close eyes- splash underwater- opens eyes briefly while coming up • Wearing earrings Extreme Tubing Fail Aug 1 P-23 D-19 • ITS ANOTHER JAMAICA BLESS • people on tube • So after seeing that do you want to do I️t Phil? • Phil is so soft omg • Yeah • Two others on boat • One looks like driver • About to die • Girl • Dan likes I️t more than Phil • Both fall • Basically me and Phil died • Dan elbowed Phil in face Pelvic Thrusts Aug 12 P-23 D-19 • Danosaurs • L blue t shirt • In bedroom • Quick vloggy vid • Updated on life • Shit at vlogging • Kittens out shit • No scirpt • Just notes • Jamaica was fun • Not live in country with incests • Phil and him have bites everywhere • Everything wants to kill you more than people • To vids v proud of • We spent days editting them • Watch I️t again • Mortal combat scene was funny • Summer in city last weekend • Meet up in field for three days • Like 50 lovely people • Jonny Barum • Gave I️ Love you robot shirt • Intoxicating when gave I️t to him • Also a youtuber • He’s lovely • Charlieisso cool • It’s a hair flip • Phil is moving out • To own flat in Manchester • 14th floor • Looking forward to shooting vids there • Dump all my shit in his house stay there all time and eat his food • Truth or dare next vid • Outside with public • Send in YouTube message do t clutter comments • Fuck a duck • Promised people he would spon • Get featured uk • Spon • He’s made 4 vids without putting them up • This vid has gone but to shoutouts • Pelvic thrusts to make up for I️t • Bunch of perverts • I️ will upload 7 minute videos bc I’m awesome text at the end watch dan talk about a competition you helped him win Oct 5 P-23 D-19 • In bedroom at corner • Wearing grey vest thing and white t shirt • Spent long time editing • Uploading whatever to channel • Don’t expect good things • Invisible friends • Omg the editing • Clip star finalists • Vote for him and Phil • Terrible text • Win prizes for free • One of 30 postcards • Signed worn topman boxers • Steven Phil and His script • Pic chosen in glitter pen • Return to dailybooth • Vid of him and Phil dancing • Better channel layout • Happy dan full of smiles • Happiest Dan in world • See you guys soon University Life Oct 21 P-23 D-19 • In uni halls • Not askaban • On bed • Heart dude • Then Edward • Confusing 3 week’s • Settled • This place is actually beautiful • Joked I️t wold be horrible • Scenic window view • Piping in building • Vintage prison feel • No window kitchen • L shaped lounge • Fridge for 12 people • Exposed brick work • Hard working convicts that built this place • Zooms on someone on computer • Through window • Hello • Creeper text • Rly like room • Bat and gym and shops • Closest halls to lecture • Roll across halls in pjs • Marelyn drew his room across from rape factory • How does smoke say rape • Zoom on papers • Intense parting every night • Earlier this week • Him playing wit hair • Someone knocks on door • Hey what you doing • YouTube thing I️ do • Rightttt ok I’m I’ll leave you to I️t • Dan slaps his face • Forever alone meme • Thumbnail • Lesbian action • Sorry but he did try • Knocks on girls door • V pretty girl- purple nails, brown hair and tanned skin • Lizzie and Ellie upstairs • Indian accent • Wants to speak to girls • What do you want to speak to girls about • Oh I’m just making a video • Girl in grey beanie • Nicer room • Hi are you busy • No • Can you be thumbnail of my vid • Hot girl looks p uncomfortable other looks ok • V attractive • Take of all clothes and make out • Serious? Yes! • What are you filming • I️ tried • Post vid response • Showing uni halls • Aww kitty! • Hello! • What are you trying to say the game? 2011 Dan Mail Jan 16 P-23 D-19 • At uni • Sweatshirt grey • Guys aren’t fans • Periodically make them • Some text • T shirt • Dan is not on fire t shirt • Dead babies and underwear on paper • I️ love you Dan raffe • Drawing • Sticks up drawings on wall • Likes every time of music • Loves moulin rouge • Loves edge cronicals • Fav color gold • Bumto fav drink? • Can’t write back • Will email • Sabrina • PlZ don’t put glitter • Hello kitty • Team Jacob • Make twilight vid • Native American likes • Basketball bracelet • Matt Belemy heart hands • Pokémon drawing • Toy zebra • Unfold letter • Huge letter • Chain cow • Paper crane • Short attention span • Can’t say happy birthday to everyone • Silver candle • Evie • Freddie off skins • Big compliment • Hawaiian Punch mix • Lava • Kiss marks on envelope • He likes native Americans • Dan get the hula hoops off Phil • Condoms • Put butterfly tattoos on face • Earrings • Friend walked in on him in bathroom • Drink not for him • Dramatic music • Tampon with his face and Phil’s face on I️t • Few of them • Disturbed • Scared • Stains • Horror laughs • Beheaded doll • Decorates Wall • Heart hands • Why the hell have you watched • Space background • Shorter in future WORLD’S FASTEST COIN STACKER Feb 23 P-24 D-19 • In uni I️ think • Uni sweatshirt • Long time no see • Had haircut • Likes I️t • Guinness world record tried to get him to break his record • People cried over him cutting hair • He hated his hair • Phil wanted Dan to say he spent previous night asleep on someone’s floor so that’s why he looks like dying monkey • Me Phil Bryony Ed • (Paper lilies and eddplant) • Other non internet people • Omg that hair... • Fastest stack of coins • After ten minutes of practice • Dan’s teem has spit shirts • Phil’s has stripes • Phil’s stack falls • Then Dan’s • He blames everyone in room • Acted humble but I️t wasn’t ok • 38 secs • Phil is confident he can beat him • Dan says Phil is just a jumble of nerves • This is hilarious • Dan’s falls • 31.617 Phil has new record • One good thing has to happen to Phil in his life • Dan was happy for him • Shot to him crying on bed • Compete against roger black • Olympic • Fastest one handed toilet tool • Ik I️ look retardo • Cocky • Katie weasel • His roll failed • Dan disqualified • Final fantasy music sad • Never wipe him again • V sore loser lol • Went home last week • Suitcase full of letters • Falls off chair Dan Mail 2 Mar 3 P-24 D-19 • Uni • On red spinning chair • Necklace thing? • Can’t react • Happy birthday changes camera angle • Happy birthday at this point • Good friend who showed the video • Now he never has to do that again • Never not show a letter • Pink llama • Llama hat • Cool girls always wear them • He can’t bc he’s boy • In vid he will • Dan mobile drawing • How hair is? • Straighten I️t • Dan and Phil in lot of things • Says envelope weirdly • Dancing in underwear in pic • Naked playing xbox drawing • Talented creeper • Has to stop recording every letter • Retarded • Good work my minions- for laying down • Prize for whoever finds how many time he says awesome and incredible • Hello kitty • Silly band (OMG) • Justin Bieber stickers • Guessed Indiana • Looks like brendon urie • Seeing panic in April • I️ pad but didn’t have any spare ones • Kristen Stewart disabled face • Porn • The game • Fussing over camera quality • Teacher thought she’s weird for thinking microwave is onomatopoeia • Will there be Pinof 3 • Kisses from Bulgaria • Bebe from Bulgaria has friend • Summer time or vampire money fav song on album • Ties up hair • Looks like troll • Likes my dimples • Nickname- bear SCREAMMMMM • Placenta fav word • Pandas over koalas • Fav yougurt vanilla • Dogs over cat • Plays piano, drums, ocurina? • Oh dear another box... • Lots of love and blood • Another decapprd doll • Actual placenta ? • Another vid later • Updated wall • In apartment red • Tv episodes • Fiesta music • The game on his door PSYCHO FRENCH TEACHER Apr 22 P-24 D-19 • In dorm • Twilights last shirt • Danacodes • New series • 16 • Gcses • Thought he was good • Doctor brown • New teacher • Not mister- doctor • Woofs and meows • Friend joe • Dog biscuits in drawer • Broken cds • Coffee cups disappear • Dan saw coffee cup • 20 dirty coffee mugs • Everyone looked • Locking people in cupboard • Singing alpha theme song • Translate in French • Csi • Had clothes in drawers • All go home bc dr brown • Runaway teacher • awkward silence • I️ was abused as a child • Vanished • Hilarious teacher • Got C • Sadness • Pom bear massacure was good (last video) • Excited from Easter Dan Mail 3 May 11 P-24 D-19 • I️ love you robot shirt • In dorm • Sunglasses they fall • Conclusion to trilogy • Sorry for being ugly • Other idk • Summer here • Wasp • Guess 13 minutes • Cool names • John and Susan • Star sign is Gemini • Such a strong man • Never throws away • Likes girl band kpop • Another boy yayyy • Not going to small things • Drops camera • Also lovemaking wrist accessories • Danmark • Plays wow • Another boy yes • Card that represents maturity • Where’s free socks? • 2005 on MySpace likes into shakari • I️ must be depressed • Ninja Jew • Tongue tattoos • Does one • Fire • Banana trumpet edit fail • Handlebar mushdash would suit him • Fantasy about you in bed bath fantasy about cutting him open while naked Phil watches tied up • Bra • Playboy perfume • Valentines cards for him and Phil • Would be breaking guidelines if shown • Creepy doll with hair • O_____x • Next dan mail at home bc he’s going home for spring break • Text saying it’s now may 11 and already filmed I️t • Delia Smith Gamer girls are HAWT June 7 P-24 D-19 • At Phil’s place • Graphic tee • Bi annual vlog • Raped and pillaged by vids • Filming at his flat for no reason • Background boring jazz I️t up • Gets pillow • Hair at lion mane • 2nd June finished exams • Woke up in morning of each exam and wrote notes • Don’t-do-don’t deserve to pass • Paying to procrastinate • Good luck! • I️t only gets worse as u get older • Last year in La... • Don’t like Wii U • But u probs don’t care • Do girls like games • Mario with grandma • Guitar hero is good • Question applies to boys too • Going to be 20 • Tramantic • Complete child • Youngest youtuber • Still young and pretty • Vyou • Redesigning website • 5000 unanswered • Going back soon • Video ideas • Would you rather • Him and friend playing • Don’t know you friend will be lol • Phil • PHIL IS WEARING CORNIELA SHIRT I️ THINK • mildly sexual • Ask me ask me ask me! • Byeeee • Totoro dancing • Delia Smith I️ Am Mexican Aug 15 P-24 D-20 • In Phil’s place • In black couch • Time machine • Was in Sicily for two weeks • Zelda? Watercolour shirt • Shorts • Looks black/ Mexican • P offensive • Jumpcut to his room • Clothes everywhere • Filmed two things at Sicily • Snorkelling • Jumpcut • Bright blue trunks • Music • Evil Black Sea urchins • Death balls • Last day at catacombs • Dead bodies • Freaky but awesome • Wall of dead babies • Reading festival • Reading and Leeds • Every year at end of August • Wristbands • Been for last four years • Doche patrol • Thin wrists so they make him look less like Ethiopian orphan • Nice to have color • Pictures • With two guys and girl sitting at knees • Other dude • One guy has purple hair • Tents • Best moments in live • Good camper • Did I️ mention I’m going with Phil • Come stalk me • Looking forward to mcr • Muse is reason he and Phil had to go • Twilights last • 10th anniversary • Origin of symmetry his and Phil’s all time fav album • Highlight • Lost Dan Mail 4 video file • Comment best live bands • Muse, arcade fire, the prodigy, rage against machine, panic • Shorts • Red pants • His and Phil’s new apartment • Gif of him on breakfast bar • Bloopers • Traditionally Aeroplane Adventures 2- with danisnotonfire Sept 15 P-24 D-20 • Saying title • Zoom on face • Had cold which is why he sounds like duck • Chris and pj • Chris won contest • Phil next to Dan • Free seats • Cheese tray and chicken salad • Lemon scented hand towel • Free champagne • Phil laughs • Phil shouted at him for blowing bubbles • *embarrassed Phil wishes I️ didn’t exist • Coffin toilets • Us four are least business class people • There is not enough business in this class • Theo pthetis • From dragons den • On same flight • Phil pointed I️t out • Anticlimax • In robe endscreen • Music EPIC PRANK OFF! Dec 1 P-24 D-20 • In room at new apartment • Bright blue shirt • Wirrow drawing above bed • Blue stripped pillows • Tv in side • Guitar hero stuff • Other side of bed • Video contest • Prank off • From mr wiggly things • Don’t prank pets • Pillow on door and Phil walks in • Phil wearing plaid blue • Do you want a Ribena- yeah please- shoots him- • On laptop • Party popper • Phil in shower • Robert Patterson • Porn on computer • Salt in coffee • Their laughs sound same aw • Dribbled all over himself • Goes to get dan • Washes out mouth • 500 pounds • 5 best get Danisnotonfire tshirt • Powder in Phil’s hair dryer • On same side of bed • I️ hate you • Worst day ever • Making sequel to this called death of Dan If Dan was a Suerhero.. Dec 21 P-24 D-20 • On couch against wall • Party tricks • Flip wrists • Dining room table • Pick up chicks • Hippo noise • Film chronicle shirt video contest • Satrodophone poke song • Polar bears on face • Phil says he isn’t talented • Llamas kill everyone • Famous places • World becomes llama • Calming music at end 2012 Narcoleptic Laptop Feb 3 P-25 D-20 Deleted PRANK WINNERS! Deleted danisnotonfire Next Vlogger! May 6 P- 25 D-20 • Sitting on bed, camera is facing door • Joker t shirt • Bulky computer • Black comforter • Blue, black, and tan ish pillow • My name is dan • Known as Danisnotonfire • Made YouTube account 2006 • Oct 12, 2006 • Was 14 years old (haha same as me!) • And nothing I️ could do about I️t • British from Workingham • Currently lives in Manchester • Tell people stories of horrific experiences to himself • Near death experiences- Jamaica jumping off cliff clip plays • Cut to Manchester uni sweatshirt annoying people in cinemas • Time mum red browsing history • Llama hat in that • Vlogging communicates with people on personal level • When he says he stabbed someone bc no left hand scissors an gets comment ‘FAG’ • User blurred out • Think got wrong one • PaigeeStudd- basically saying I️ feel you • Makes I️t worthwhile • Channel is support group for people who hate peoples • Excited *effects* about next vlogger take vids to next level • Tapes lamp shade to ceiling for lighting • Better vids to laugh at • Danisnotonfire outro SuperNote 2012- THE LLAMARMY Oct 1 P- 25 D-21 • Black screen w/- “we are interrupting the normal Dan broadcasting schedule.” • Woah Dan this isn’t a Thursday • In living room • Eclipse shirt • Thursday still happening • Looks bare- old shelf • Team captain of supernote 2012 • Wearing bracelet? • Ended up winning • 2008 • YouTube community • Longest note out of mouth • You guys if want to join my team • Sexy, sad, manly • Video response • Police car outside • Team name: llamarmy • P big deal • You guys post vid responses, bullying him in comments, edit his face onto giraffes • Sweatpants grey • Longest note, llama hat and danasaur t shirt • And personal note • Others win totoros and wrist bands • Wow old vid • Phil comes in • Wearing grey make videos everyday shirt • Aww Phil looks so cute • Phil’s going to win • High five that hurts • Phil wearing llama hat • Phil lower note • ‘Dan you are so hot’ written below • Dan lasts longer • Underdogs • Get lots of people • Deadline Oct 31 • Danisnotonfire outro • Galaxy end Life’s Unanswerable Questions Oct 12 P-25 D-21 • Collab with Alex day • Wearing multicoloured tee • Sitting in front of fire place • Tetris lights • Hello internet • Unanswerable questions annoy • Found website in comic sans • Erradicate I️t • He likes to share opinions • What came first chicken or egg- egg • Tree would make sound • Bothers him • Ate tounge what would taste like • Tried to fail and succeed what have you done • Dan answers with sandwhich • Color is mirror • I️t has no color • Chameleon • Car at speed of light turn on headlights • Paradox • Can guy names nick have nickname • 4 out of 5 diahrea enjoy I️t? • Marsquakes-no • What is the speed of dark • Why can’t woman put mascara on with mouth closed • Dictionary in dictionary? Yes • What is meaning of life • Sirens • Best way to lose weight- cut self in half • Dan believes in aliens • Aliens aren’t going to look weirder than jellyfish • Bus driver closedoor • Can cry underwater • How old would you be if didn’t know your age • Someone vanished w/o trace how do people know missing • Timmy for a decade • Don’t try to get people to like you for the wrong reasons • Outro • Sexy endscreen dance • More interesting than space endscreen Men vs Women Dec 8 P-25 D-21 • On couch • B/w Brit flag pillow • Camp and grey t shirt • Earrings that are multicoloured • Which sex has is harder • Cat ears • Carrie • Opinions aren’t meant to be taken seriously black screen • Hit I️t rn • Getting kicked in balls or giving birth • Rly hurts • Guys never ask to be kicked in ball again • Squeezing watermelon out of ass • Dan wasn’t aware girls couldn’t lie on front • Nipples are useless • Joy of lactation • Man can’t have multiple orgasms • Sucks • Men get arosed and no one knows • Old ladies read 50 shades • Think grandma • Men can pee standing up and that sucks • Girls can multitask • What is so bad about periods • Don’t get into argument • Don’t ask if I’m Period • Dan had done that • Bleeding out of penis forever • Women live longer • Men don’t understand women have I️t harder • Women win • Debated in comments • Both sexy endscreen 2013 GOOD NEWS EVERYONE Jan 12 P-25 D-21 • In living room • Black long t shirt • So cold • Spicky jumper from topman • Jump in jeans • Repression how hardcore he is while life • Ryan from X factor wearing I️t • Burn I️t? • Mouse in bedroom • Trying to catch I️t humanity • BBC radio 1 • Phil comes next to him • Phil’s been making him not swear • Every Sunday unless they get fired • Watch entire show • 7-9 pm • Phil in blue sweashirt • Schedules • He’s loosey goosy uploading • Shit looking photos need more of • YouTube angry mob • You tubers don’t follow through • Dan Unspecific • Video on school • Never really talked about • Have nice day unless I’m Jamaica then I hate you bc you’re warm • Endscreen zooming on house objects w/ sexy music 2014 Dan and Phil SIM SURPRISE PHONE CALL! Dec 18 P-27 D-23 • In gaming room • Dan in horn hoodie • Phil in purple sh jumper • No pillows in back • Surprise calling random person • Phil is scared • Awkward on phone • Oh my goddd • Person is freaking out • Casey • Was just doing hw • English hw about them • How much she fangirls about them • Did you see photo of dan at bbc in Dino onesie • Not saying I️ hate but that was terrible • Told Phil about cat dying on YouTube • Watching for 2 Years • Collab- so many favs • Fav animal llama • Sorry about Phil • I️ need to tweet about this • That was so funny • Animal impression helps • Maybe next victim 2015 HOW TO PARTICIPATE IN THE DAN AND PHIL TOUR Oct 4 P- 28 D- 24 • Sitting in theatre looking behind chairs • Lots of stuff on stage • Rehearsal space • Dan in eclipse • Phil in constallion lion • 5 days • More tickets • Oct 8- Nov 4 • Danandphilbook.com • Want audience participation • Come hour early • 7 sec, weird kid, isg, crafts • P.O. box videos from back in day • Might not be able to keep I️t • Thinking about people from rest of world • Dan winks • Phil does I️t too to help 2016 HOW TO PARTICIPATE IN THE DAN AND PHIL TOUR! April 19 P-29 D-24 • In dressing room • From 360? • Dan in plain black t • Phil in show attire • Sup-a-de-fiddle • Dried mango • Cool creative ways • Arrive early • 7 sec, • Show box • Weird kid, show examples • Craft examples • No bigger than medium otter • Can’t keep them • Phil said mems • Chow • For now • Was that necessary? HOW TO GET INVOLVED IN #TATINOF Aug 12 P-29 D-25 • In same room • Oh it’s same video lol

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writingishard-loverandloser · 7 years

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Hey could I get a match up for it and stranger things? I'm like 5'3" and bi. I've boy short, bright blue, and and deep brown eyes with big glasses. I've asthma so I don't really play sports but I'd love to. I love drawing and making things and reading. Holy shit I'm a fucking nerd. I'm usually labeled the mom friend and care alot about those I'm around. I'm very protective but also terrible with feelings lol I've been told I'm a flirt but also and angry chihuahua who can stop cursing lolol

First of all you’re like the Reddie love child we’ve all been looking for and I love it.

IT:

I ship you with Mike!

God we would love his smol fiery mouthed chihuahua. You and Mike met when you were riding home one day. You say Mike getting beat up by Bowers. It was just him but by how bad Mike looked you guessed that the others were there earlier and Henry just stuck around to kick Mike while he’s down. Of course — being the decent person you are — you couldn’t stand for it. “Hey, Bowers! Cut it the fuck out you freak!” Bowers turned around and sneered at you, “Why aren’t you a pretty thing. Maybe I can have some fun with you instead of the low life.” “Do not fUCKING TOUCH ME!” Right after you screamed Bowers fell face first onto the ground, behind him a bruised and bloodied Mike stood over him holding a large stick. “Thank you...” “You too...” Needless to say the two of you felt a strong connection after that. You’re actually the reason he got so into books. The two of you would read the same book then have in depth conversations about it once you finish. You’d always ride your bike to his house after school and draw while he finishes his chores. Your excuse was that you like the landscape but really you’d take any excuse to be around him constantly. Your sketchbooks are filled with cute drawings of him and his animals. Mike always knew he cared about you he just wasn’t sure how much he really did — since you guys met and started hanging out before the IT summer. When you all were in the sewers at IT’s lair he noticed how protective he was, how close he was, how his heart started pounding whenever you shifted your stand slightly away from him out of fear of you wandering, how when Bowers attacked him you were the thought in the back of his mind that made his will to live even stronger. He didn’t feel that with any of the other Losers. A few weeks after everything was over he told the other boys about it during a sleepover at Bill’s house. Richie laughed in his face, “You like her, man!” “No… no she’s my friend. You’re all my friends.” Richie scoffs, “Who’s the first person that comes to your mind when you wake up in the morning?” “Y/n…” Stan injects, “What about when you go to sleep?” “Y/n…” Ben smiles, “Do you want to sing but throw up all at once?” Bill adds, “D-d-does your stomach tie into knots when she l-laughs.” Eddie gives him a knowing glance, “Does your heart to backflips and breath catch in your throat when she smiles?” Richie smirks, “Does your groin start to tingle when she stands close to you?” “Richie!” He laughs, “Do you do any of that stuff when it comes to any of us? Or even Bev?” Mike blinks and shakes his head. Richie grins, “Well there’s your answer!” Mike stands up slowly, “I, uh… I have some place to be.” Stan winks at him knowingly, “We know.” With that Mike smiled at them and ran out the door. MEANWHILE: Bev had just convinced you to let her look through your sketchbooks and she can’t stop smiling, “These are fantastic!” You smile shyly, “Thanks.” “But like all of them are of Mike…” You guys widen a bit and heart lurches. She smirks, “Do you like him?” “Fuck off! Of course I don’t! We’re just friends.” Bev gives you a look, “Just friends don’t draw just friend in flowery heart crowns sitting on your porch.” Oh shit. She’s got you there. “If you like him why don’t you just tell him?” Bev continues. “Easy for you to say,” You scoff, “Every boy in town has liked you at some point. You’re pretty and smart and—” “Stop. I’ve seen the way he looks at you.” You bite your lip, “Really?” Bev smiles, “Go get him.” So you run to his farm. By the time Mike got home you were asleep in a pile of hay in the barn with two sketchbooks on your lap and a origami heart in your open hand. Mike smiled softly and picked the sketchbooks up from your lap carefully sitting beside you. You never let him look through your sketchbooks for now painfully obvious reasons. He couldn’t help grinning as he flipped through the pages. The pictures gave him confidence — some proof that you like him too. He was halfway through the second sketchbook when you opened your eyes. Horrified and embarrassed that he was looking through the last thing you’d want him to see right now. “Oh God…” You gasped sitting up, “I can explain those. You see— I— I just—” You sigh in embarrassment and frustration. Mike open his mouth to speak but you cut him off. “I like you a lot okay?!” You blurt out, “And I made this for you,” You hold out the origami heart, “I’m terrible with this stuff I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t feel the same way I just love you a—” Mike cut you off with a kiss. Your eyes widened but them you melted, leaning into it. “I love you too,” Mike whispers, pulling away.

ST:

I ship you with Jonathan!

The two of you are hella compatible. You have similar interests but your personalities are just different enough for the two of you to benefit from the relationship. The two of you met in woodshop. He was having trouble so you helped him and made sure he didn’t fail the course. Neither of you had too many friends so you kinda stuck by each other. You were at his house a lot and his family loved you. He introduced you to different music and you introduced him to good literature. You and Will bonded over art and would draw and listen to music all the time. Joyce just loved that her oldest hs somebody. You were sweet and protective — you remind Joyce a lot of herself when she was younger. When Will disappeared you were there. You knew that Joyce and Jonathan would be destroyed so you needed to be strong. You let Jonathan talk and cry — even if you weren’t sure how to comfort him it was comforting for Jonathan just knowing you were there. You lost your shit when Steve started harassing him in the school parking lot. Screaming profanities he didn’t know existed. When Will came back you gave Jonathan space and time — something Nancy couldn’t — you knew he needed time to settle back into things about you knew it was comforting for him knowing you’d be there. And you were. Jonathan and you were back to normal in no time with the exception of Nancy. He started to see you in a new light during this time. You were strong, smart, caring, protective, creative, beautiful, funny, and the only person outside his family willing to wait for him. You waited. And got along with his family like they were your own. You noticed him acting slightly different around you but didn’t let it bother you. You were spending a lot more time at the Byers’ house when Will started getting worse. You wanted to help him. You knew Joyce and Jonathan mean well but you also know how suffocating they can be. Helping Will escape is one of your many hobbies. You and Will were sitting on his bed drawing when Will suddenly spoke up, “Do you like my brother?” You froze for a second before responding without looking up, “Why do you think that?” “It’s just… the two of you are always around each other. He cares about you a lot. He’s always talking about you,” Will glances up at you, “And I’ve seen the way you look at him.” “You’re a very observant kid,” You comment in a slightly annoyed tone. Will chuckles, “Thank you.” Will really made you think. You and Jonathan have been there for each other for a while. And you knew you both cared about each other… but you guess there’s something else there if a part of you melts whenever his soft brown eyes been yours. When everything went to shit — Will’s a spy, a creature’s after Hawkins again, everything is more dangerous than ever before, and now Jonathan has to leave you to go burn out Will while you stay with Steve — Jonathan couldn’t let anything else happen without letting you know. Before he got into the car he ran back and kissed you. It was explosive, powerful, electric, soft… it was everything. “He pulled away breathless and rested his forehead on yours, “I love you…” Joyce honked the horn of the car to tell him to hurry up, “I have to go. Don’t die.”

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schraubd · 7 years

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I'm Sick of Smug-Takes on Berkeley Offering "Counseling"

Former Breitbart editor Ben Shapiro is coming to campus this week. Shapiro will be followed this month by Ann Coulter, Steve Bannon, and Milo Yiannopoulos, as part of a Berkeley "free speech week". In a long email outlining the various campus policies that would be in place to facilitate all these speeches (and as I've consistently argued, having been invited by authorized community members they do have a right to speak free of censorship or material disruption, though of course not from non-intrusive protest or criticism), Executive Vice Chancellor Paul Alivisatos mentioned that, among other things, counseling services were available for any students who felt "threatened or harassed simply because of who they are or for what they believe." And the internet went wild. I don't need to collect links -- here's an example, but they're not hard to find. Across the entire political spectrum of the mainstream media -- you know, center-left to hard-right -- there was near-uniform glee in dumping on coddling Berkeley administrators and infantile Berkeley students who need counseling just because they're hearing "ideas they disagree with." I cannot tell you how sick I am of hearing this. It's lazy, it's a cheap shot, it's intellectually incoherent, and above all it's mean-spirited. Berkeley isn't wrong here. And it's detractors are showing more about what's missing in their character than the most stereotypical Golden Bear hipster. For starters, Berkeley is a big place. It's total enrollment is over 40,000 students. These young people come from a range of backgrounds, and at any given time across that 40,000 there will be persons who are struggling, or experiencing crises, or feeling threatened, or any other permutation of personal circumstance and emotional troubles you can imagine. I've already written recently about how all of us -- self-satisfied declarations notwithstanding -- intuitively understand how certain speech can truly wound deeply, in a manner which we can all empathize with. That doesn't mean we ban it (and offering counseling doesn't "ban" anything), but it does mean that there's a genuine phenomena that we can and should attempt to address So let's be empathic. Let's imagine, amongst Berkeley's 40,000 students, that there is a student who is struggling. Maybe he's away from home for the first time and having difficulty adjusting. Maybe she feels in over her head in classes, finding that work that got her an A in high school is barely scraping a C at Berkeley. And then let's add more to it -- maybe he's just found out that he's now at imminent risk of deportation from the only country he's ever truly known. Maybe she's found out that, though she proudly served her country and is a veteran of the American armed forces, the President of the United States publicly declared her to be a burden on the US military who should never have been allowed to wear the uniform. Now let's remember who Ben Shapiro is.

Ben Shapiro thinks that trans individuals suffer from a "mental illness" and gratuitously misgenders them for the primary purpose of causing offense. He refers to DACA as President Obama's "executive amnesty". Pretty much the only reason his isn't an avowed member of the alt-right is that they happen to hate him too. He's not an intellectual. He's not one the great thinkers of the right. His oeuvre, his raison d'etre, is to be a hurtful provocateur. That's what he brings to the table.

And let's be clear: this, the above, was why Ben Shapiro was invited to Berkeley. It wasn't because he offered "a different view." And it certainly wasn't because of the intellectual candlepower he has on offer. The people who invited Ben Shapiro to UC-Berkeley did so because of, not in spite of, the hurt he will dish out to already-vulnerable members of the community. The students I outlined above -- already struggling, buffeted by political dynamics which very much are designed to dehumanize them -- now have to reckon with the reality that a non-negligible chunk of their colleagues are glad they're feeling that way. They actively want to accelerate the process. They'll go out of their way to invite speakers to reiterate and emphasize the point.

Honestly, I don't blame them if they could use a venue to talk out their feelings a bit. It strikes me as spectacularly uncharitable, a colossal failure of basic empathy, to think otherwise. Then again, what is our polity going through now but a colossal failure of basic empathy?

After the election, I made a similar comment (which I cannot find) when people again made fun of college kids who expressed deep hurt and fear upon the election of Donald Trump. This, too, was attributed to fragile millennial snowflakes who don't know how to tolerate hardship. And I remarked that the man now faced with being expelled from the country is not scared because he's frail, and the woman who was the victim of a sexual assault is not despondent because she's weak-willed. We've seemingly moved past "don't punch people who think you're subhuman" (okay) to "don't be sad that people think you're subhuman" (really?). Some are arguing that the real problem with offering counseling is that it doesn't teach the kids "resilience". First of all, I wonder what they think goes on in counseling sessions -- my strong suspicion is that they are precisely about fostering resiliency so that students are better able to cope with such annoying trivialities like "I may be torn from the only home I've ever known at any moment and a sizeable portion of what I thought was my community will cheer as they drag me off." The objection here isn't so much to lack of resilience as to the university having the temerity to try and teach it -- like objecting to wilderness training because shouldn't real men already know how to survive outdoors? Second, it is hard not to hear in this objection a deep resentment at the fact that today, even now, some people still do proactively care about the feelings of others. The argument seems to be that "fifty years ago if someone felt marginalized on a college campus nobody gave a shit. Today, some people -- including a few holding administrative positions -- do care, and for some reason that's a step backwards for society." One can hear more than a little of the typical mockery associated with using therapy of any sort -- though I admit I hadn't heard it manifest this overtly in some time -- which suggests that only persons of pathologically fragile mental composition could ever need something as lily-livered as counseling. Again, I find this argument hard to relate to, seeing as its genealogy is so thoroughly bound up in nothing more complicated than pure cruelty. Shorn of the feelings of superiority it generates, can anyone actually defend this? Others complain that students shouldn't be going to therapy in response to such speech, they should be responding in other ways -- debate, protest, donations, activism, any thing else. Of all the objections, this is the one that is the most difficult to credit. Does anyone think that the only way Berkeley students will respond to Ben Shapiro's speech is by going to counseling sessions? That Friday morning, all 40,000 of us will march into whatever center houses our mental health professionals and demand to be soothed? Of course not. Of course there will be debate, and protest, and donations, and activism. And you can bet that however such actions manifest, people will still find a way to denounce the entire response tout court -- unjustified actions like violence, yes, but also silent protest, but also waving signs, but also pure condemnatory speech (especially if that speech dares use the dreaded -ism or -phobic suffixes). Finally, let's dispense with the notion that this is all being triggered by students who can't tolerate "ideas they disagree with." For starters, it's notable that while Alivisatos' email does not in fact refer to any speakers in particular, everybody simultaneously assumed they were talking about Ben Shapiro while at the same time being aghast at how anyone could possibly need counseling after hearing Ben Shapiro. Me thinks they protest to much. But more to the point: Berkeley regularly hosts speakers who will present ideas many on campus will disagree with. This week, David Hirsh is giving a talk on "Contemporary Left Antisemitism" -- surely, many on campus would resist his conclusions. Later this term, National Review editor Reihan Salam will be speaking on immigration policy -- with no known objections or protests planned. So the problem isn't ideas people disagree with. The problem is Ben Shapiro, and Ann Coulter, and Milo Yiannopoulos. One doesn't invite them to campus because they're presenting important ideas which need to be reckoned with. There are plenty of conservatives who fit the bill, and when those conservatives show up they are typically met with little fanfare. But if you're inviting this contingent, you're doing it because you like hurting people. That's their comparative advantage, that's the thing they can offer over and above all of their competitors. It neither bothers me, nor surprises me, nor offends me, that this offends certain students. If some portion of those students are in an emotional place right now where they feel like they need counseling, I encourage them to get it. If others want to protest the speech, I support their right to do so within the parameters of the law. If still others want to attend the speech, or subject Shapiro to harsh questioning, or pen scathing op-eds in the Daily Cal, I applaud them all for it. And each of these options got pride of place in Alivistos' email. All of these are valid responses. None of them are worthy of scorn, none of them signal any deficiency in our student body. What is far more worrisome is the reaction of the so-called "adults" in the media, who have grown so fond of bashing kids-these-days that they've seemingly forgotten the need to reason, much less to empathize. via The Debate Link http://ift.tt/2xjwwVY

#academia #Berkeley #College #free speech #psychology #youth

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theyearoftheking · 5 years

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Book 2: ‘Salem’s Lot

Success is my only motherfuckin' option, failure’s not Mom, I love you, but this trail has got to go, I cannot grow old in Salem's lot So here I go is my shot Feet fail me not 'cause maybe the only opportunity that I got

-Eminem, Lose Yourself

The mere mention of ‘Salem’s Lot has had my brain playing this song on repeat for weeks. And after reading ‘Salem’s Lot, I’d like to point out to Eminem that it’s actually quite difficult to grow old in ‘Salem’s Lot. You’re more likely to be turned into a creepy vampire than grow old and die of natural causes in The Lot. But I feel like if I were to ever address this with one Marshall Mathers, he’d punch me in the face. So I guess I’ll just rest comfortably with my superior Stephen King knowledge.

This was my first reading of ‘Salem’s Lot, and while I enjoyed Carrie; I feel this was the book that made the Stephen King “style” a thing fans are all familiar with. I’m not going to dive into the entire plot and every character, but the format of the book, and the relationships the characters form will be familiar to all King fans. Let me explain.

Part One: The Introduction

The book is divided into three parts. In Part One: Marsten House, we learn about the lovely little town of Jerusalem’s Lot, and start feeling a creeping sense of dread every time the Marsten House is mentioned. We don’t know why we feel creepy dread quite yet, but the feeling is lurking in our stomach like a slimy gas station burrito. We also experience a meet cute between Ben Mears and Susan Norton. Ben is a writer, hanging out at the park, trying to forget all the negativity and bad juju he experienced the first time he lived in ‘Salem’s Lot. But now he’s back, living at Eva Miller’s boarding house, working on his next novel. Susan sees him in the park, and just so happens to be reading one of his books. She asks for an autograph, and he inscribes it, “For Susan Norton, the prettiest girl in the park...” The rest is history. Well, vampire, bloodshed history. But romantic history none the less.

Later on, Ben Mears references The Haunting of Hill House, which was an inspiration for this novel. He tells Susan the subject of his newest novel is, ”...it’s about the recurrent power of evil...” Art imitating life, ammiright, Steve???

Part one also gives us our first (of three!) Wisconsin references. Ben decides to hit up the local watering hole, Dell’s, where he runs into fellow boarding house resident, Weasel Craig. To hear Ben describe it, “...his breath alone could have made Milwaukee famous.” I mean... we do love and brew a lot of beer in this city. But you can imagine my disappointment when in the next paragraph, Weasel orders a pitcher of Budweiser. Gross, Weasel, You deserve to be taken out by those vampires.

Part one continues to give us plenty of local color, and describes the residents of the town (spoiler: don’t get too attached to any of them). Part one ends with some creepy goings-on at the cemetery, and some children disappearing, and later re-appearing in slightly alarming form. Oh, and a lot of bodies at the morgue start disappearing. Never a good sign.

Part Two: The Dread Explained, and the Start of Shit Going Sideways

Part Two: The Emperor of Ice Cream is when the beat drops. But before all of that, we have our final two Wisconsin references. King twice mentions a Packers Patriots game everyone in town is anxious to watch. Ok. I have questions. So many questions. How did Steve decide on this particular football match-up? We’re not division rivals, we don’t even play in the same division. The Packers and Patriots play each other once in a blue moon. Wouldn’t the Bills or the Jets have been a more sensible selection? Maybe the Dolphins? Maybe they were good back in 1975? I don’t know. I do know I personally love Packers/Patriots games because I love seeing Tom Brady pout like a little bitch on the sidelines when our inconsistent defense shows up and decides to tackle him. Repeatedly. It’s a miracle Brady doesn’t trip over that lower lip more.

But I digress. Part two is where shit really starts to go wrong, and we understand the problems plaguing ‘Salem’s Lot are the result of a powerful vampire, Mr. Barlow and his keeper, Mr Straker, moving into Marsten House. That’s right... it’s a vampire book, kids. These two keep a low profile by buying a creepy old murder house, and running an antique store full of old junk in town. As you do.

King holds true to a lot of the traditional vampire stereotypes: they only come out at night, they are burned by sunshine, they sleep in coffins or boxes, they need to be invited in, and they can be repelled by a crucifix or some holy water. No glittery, pretty vamps here. Sorry, Twilight fans. This probs isn’t the book for you.

Part two of the book is filled with creepy passages full of suspense. You know, those parts when you find yourself cringing and chanting, “No! No! Don’t crawl into the creepy old murder house during the day! I don’t care if you think the vampires are sleeping! This isn’t going to end well!” I know most people have those moments when watching movies... but this book (and King in general) usually brings out all the creepy, cringy feels for me.

So, Ben, Susan, and their ragtag band of friends begin to understand the vampire problem, and realize they need to address it before everyone in town either flees, or becomes part of Barlow’s vampire army. One member of their merry band of vampire killers is a little boy by the name of Mark Petrie. Mark lost two of his best friends in the initial round of vampire attacks, and feels guilt about this. If they weren’t on their way to his house to play with his models, maybe they wouldn’t have ended up as part of the un-dead. As a result of this guilt, Mark wants to help the grownups fight the vampires. He’s a bad ass kid. I hope my kid would behave the same way if we were fighting a vampire onslaught in Milwaukee.

King best sums up their crew of vampire killers as, “An old teacher half-cracked with books, a writer obsessed with his childhood nightmares, a little boy who has taken a post-graduate course in vampire lore from the films and the modern prenny-dreadfuls...”

Accurate af.

Part Two ends with a passage I have to share... “The ordinary fellow isn’t half so leery of the superatural as the fiction writers like to make out. Most writers who deal in that particular subject, as a matter of fact, are more hardheaded about spirits and demons and boogies than your ordinary man in the street...”

Part Three: The Real Action, All the Deaths & the Conclusion

Part Three: The Deserted Village wraps everything up. Almost all the residents of ‘Salem’s Lot are turned into vampires, including almost all of the vampire hunters with the exception of Ben and Mark. They ‘nope’ right on out of ‘Salem’s Lot and head for Mexico. Because they’ve seen some shit, and they need to live in perpetual sunshine where they never have to fight vampires again. Only, Ben can’t stop reading the Portland Press-Herald and realizes shit is getting real in Maine again, and they eventually need to go back. Poor Mark; it’s bad enough he lost his friends, had to stake both his parents, and killed the vampire’s keeper. But now he needs to go back? Ugh.

Part three also gives us two coveted Dark Tower references (because, The Beam).

“Ann Norton drew the .38 from the pockets of her wrapper like some creaky gunslinger from beyond time...”

Oh snap. It’s coming. Da da chick, da da chum!

I’ve also failed to mention much about Father Callahan. He was the Catholic priest of ‘Salem’s Lot who suffered a vampire bite despite his crucifix and holy water bath, and was last seen on a bus getting out of town, drinking cheap truck stop liquor. But we’ll see him again. ‘Tis ka.

All and all, a very satisfying book, and I’m very glad I’ve finally gotten around to reading it.

In summation:

Total King Wisconsin Mentions: 4

Dark Tower References: 2

Book Grade: B+

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books:

Salem’s Lot

Carrie

Next up is The Shining; which is perfect since Wisconsin is expecting its first major snowfall this weekend. Fun times.

Until next time- long days and pleasant night, readers!

Rebecca

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weekendwarriorblog · 6 years

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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEEKEND MARCH 8, 2019 – CAPTAIN MARVEL!!!

This is a big weekend for Marvel Studios, as they release their first superhero movie with a female protagonist -- not counting Elektra (thanks for the laugh, Max Evry!) -- and the question is not whether it will make $100 million this weekend but how much MORE than $100 million it will be making this weekend. But that’s a question to be answered over at my gig at The Beat and it will be answered in about an hour...

CAPTAIN MARVEL (Marvel Studios/Disney)

Directed by Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck (Half Nelson, Sugar, Mississippi Grind) Written by Boden, Fleck and Geneva Robertson-Dworet Cast: Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson, Jude Law, Ben Mendelsohn, Djimon Hounsou, Lee Pace, Annette Bening, Gemma Chan, McKenna Grace, Lashana Lynch, Clark Gregg MPAA Rating: PG-13

I’m not sure how much more I have to say about the latest Marvel movie after writing about it extensively for The Beat. (You are reading my Box Office Preview there for all the stuff you used to read in this column about the wide releases, right?)

I am greatly looking forward to seeing this on Thursday night for a number of reasons and none of them are due to “old white man hater” Brie Larson, who I used to have respect for until she decided to attack me and my livelihood and ability to get work.

That said, I’ve been waiting for directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck to break out and do a big studio movie for many years, as I’ve been a fan of theirs since Half Nelson and have spoken to them a number of times including one of my favorites of theirs, the road trip movie Mississippi Grind, starring Ryan Reynolds and Ben Mendelsohn, who played a much nicer and more sympathetic role in that then he has portraying the villain in many studio movies since then.

I’m also looking forward to Captain Marvel since it introduces to the MCU the idea of the alien races, the Kree and the Skrulls, who have played such a large part in some of my favorite Marvel Comics storylines, including the “Kree-Skrull War” from The Avengers, which certainly could be something being set up in the MCU. I also loved the Skrulls as Fantastic Four villains, and here’s hoping that with the new Disney-Fox merger, we might actually see a GOOD Fantastic Four movie one of these days (or a crossover with Avengers even!)

Anyway, we’ll see whether I feel like writing a review for this on Friday after seeing it on Thursday night, but it’s really tough to be fair and impartial when the star of a movie has already gone out of her way to write you off, due to your gender, race and age.

More importantly, let’s get to some…

LIMITED RELEASES

One of the best movie out this weekend is Oscar-winning Chilean filmmaker Sebastian Lelio’s new movie GLORIA BELL (A24), starring Julianne Moore. A remake of his 2013 Spanish language film Gloria, the filmmaker behind A Fantastic Woman makes his English language debut with Moore playing the title character, a lonely older woman dealing with family issues who goes out dancing on Friday nights in hoping of meeting men. On one such night she meets John Turturro’s Arnold, and the two of them fall into a romance that runs into issues when he finally meets her kids and ex-husband (Brad Garrett). Although I never did see Gloria, I was pretty blown away by how Lelio told this story, and Moore gives one of the best performances of her career – YES, MUCH better than her Oscar-winning turn in Still Alice. I know that A24 brought the movie to TIFF last year, but for whatever reason, they decided to hold it until March… just like Brie Larson’s Free Fire, ironically enough. Personally, I think Moore has a real chance at another Oscar nomination, but having a movie released so early in the year will make it tough, sadly. I was really able to relate to this movie more than I thought I would but mainly to Turturro’s character.

Another film worth seeking out is Vincent D’Onofrio’s second film as a director, the Western THE KID (Lionsgate), as in “Billy the Kid,” played by Dane DeHaan. The “kid” in the title is also teenager Rio, played by Jake Schur, who is on the run with his sister (Leila George) trying to get away from their abusive uncle (played by Chris Pratt!) Along the way, they meet Billy the Kid, as well as Sheriff Pat Garrett, who has been sent to capture and try Billy. It’s opening in 250 theaters on Friday, so it won’t be too hard to find, and I’d love to say more wonderful things about it, but I’ve been embargoed. I hope to have an interview with D’Onofrio soon over on The Beat!

Another film worth seeking out is 3 FACES (Kino Lorber), the new film from Iranian filmmaker Jafar Panahi (The Circle, Offside), who has been banned from making films in his home country but continues to find a way to make films anyway. This one received an award for Best Screenplay at Cannes last year and has played Toronto and New York Film Festivals before opening at the IFC Centeron Friday. Panahi also stars in this drama along with Iranian actor Behnaz Jafari, as they go on a road trip to help a girl whose family has forbidden her from attending a drama school in Tehran, encountering various people along the way. The film continues Panahi’s exploration of combining his personal life with dramatic storytelling in the real world, which I haven’t really enjoyed as much as his straight dramas.

Opening at Metrograph is Black Mother (Grasshopper Films), the new cinema verité doc from filmmaker and photographer Khalik Allah (Field Niggas), which combines portraits of denizens of Jamaica shot on 16mm and HD with audio recordings of them talking about life in Jamaica. It’s a really beautiful film, and this is from someone who generally doesn’t care for cinema verité docs, but this really is a compelling film that’s worth seeing.

Oscar winner J.K. Simmons stars in his wife Michelle Schumacher’s second film I’m Not Here (Gravitas Ventures) playing Steve, as a lonely man who is haunted by memories of his past locked into the objects and sounds around his house. The film also stars Sebastian Stan, Mandy Moore, Max Greenfield, David Koechner and Harold Perrineau, and it opens at New York’s Village East, Los Angele’s Laemmle Monica and in other select cities this Friday. (Simmons and Schumacher will be at the Laemmle for a QnA on Sunday evening.)

Opening at New York’s Quad Cinema Friday is Giacomo Durzi’s doc Ferrante Fever (Greenwich) about novelist Elena Ferrante, who has made waves both in Italy and in America, thanks to a few independent publishers.

Gabrielle Brady’s directorial debut Island of the Hungry Ghosts, winner of Best Documentary at last year’s Tribeca Film Festival, will open at Astoria’s Museum of the Moving Image. It focuses on the residents of Christmas Island off the coast of Indonesia where asylum seekers are held in a high-security detention center and counseled by trauma therapist Poh Lin Lee.

Since I haven’t had a chance to see JC (All Is Lost, Margin Call) Chandor’s new movie Triple Frontier, starring Ben Affleck, Oscar Isaac, Charlie Hunnam, Garrett Hedlund and Pedro Pascal (Narcos) as Special Forces operatives planning a South American heist, I don’t have much to say about it, although I’m sold based on the premise alone. It’s opening In New York and L.A. on Wednesday in single theaters in both places (Sorry, Steven Spielberg!) but it will stream on Netflix a week later on March 13. Maybe I’ll write more about it next week. Maybe not.

Opening at the Film Society of Lincoln Center is the late Hu Bo’s An Elephant Sitting Still (KimStim) which played at New Directors/New Films in 2018. It involves a teenager who accidentally injures a bully and interacts with various people who are dealing with their own burdens. Actor Zhang Yu will be making appearances before and after screenings including a reception before the 6:30pm screening on Friday.

This week’s Bollywood offering is Sujoy Ghosh’s BADLA (Reliance Entertainment), starring Taapsee Pannu as a young entrepreneur who is locked in a hotel room with the body of her deadl lover, so she calls upon a prestigious lawyer (Bollywood vet Amitabh Bachchan) to figure out how she ended up in that predicament.

REPERTORY

METROGRAPH (NYC):

Ringo Lam X3 continues through the weekend, while Raul Peck X2continues with a screening of Murder in Pacot (2014) on Saturday. This week’s Late Nites at Metrograph is Fassbinder’s Love is Cooler than Death (1969), and the weekend’s Playtime: Family Matinees is 1982’s The Last Unicorn, an animated film from Rankin and Bass that was co-created by the Japanese anime studio Topcraft, who went on to form Studio Ghibli – you’ve probably heard of them. The voice cast includes Mia Farrow, Alan Arkin, Jeff Bridges, Angela Lansbury and Christopher Lee, and it’s probably a bit of a lost classic.

THE NEW BEVERLY (L.A.):

Weds and Thursday is the Billy Dee Williams cop double feature The Take (1974) and Nighthawks (1981), and then on Friday and Saturday, the Bev double features One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (1975) and Arthur Hiller’s The Crazy World of Julius Vrooder (1974) (a movie I’ve never even heard of!). Sunday and Monday’s double feature is two Paul Wendkos films, The Case Against Brooklyn and Tarawa Beachhead, both from 1958. On Saturday and Sunday, the Kiddee Matinee is the Australian horse movie Phar Lap (1983) while the midnight offerings this weekend are Kill Bill Vol. 2 on Friday and The Groove Tubeon Saturday. Grindhouse Tuesday is back with the “Bruce Li” double feature of Soul Brothers of Kung Fu (1977) and The Image of Bruce Lee (1978), movies made after Bruce Lee’s death. (If I lived in L.A., this is where I would be on Tuesday night.) The high school comedy classic Clueless (1995) will screen on Tuesday, as well.

FILM FORUM (NYC):

Starting this weekend, the Greenwich Village theater presents a new 4k restoration of Jack Clayton’s 1959 film Room at the Top, which won Oscars for screenplay and actress Simone Signoret and was nominated for Picture, Director, Actor and Supporting Actress (for Hermione Baddeley’s 2.5 minute appearance in the film). It’s about a working-class guy who sets his sights on the daughter of the boss.The weekend’s Film Forum Jr. is Joe Dante’s 1993 film Matinee, starring John Goodman. Also, author David Thomson will present a screening of Joseph Losey’s 1963 film The Servant on Sunday.

MOMA (NYC):

New month, new Modern Matinees series and for the next two months, it’s a doozy with Modern Matinees: B is for Bacall, showcasing the fabulous filmography of Oscar-nominated actor Laure Bacall. This week, they’re screening the 1954 film Woman’s Worldon Wednesday, Howard Hawks’ The Big Sleep (1946) on Thursday and 1947’s Dark Passages on Friday. (Note that most of these movies will be rescreened later in the series in case you miss them this week.) Also this week is the series William Fox Presents More Restorations and Rediscoveries from the Fox Film Corporation, which features lots of movie from the ‘20s and ‘30s, many of them accompanied with live piano. Wednesday is Hangman’s House from 1928 and 1920’s Just Palsand Friday is 1929’s The Cock-Eyed World and Me and My Gal (1932), and there’s more on Saturday, Sunday and next week. This is a busy time for MOMA as they’re also presenting Carte Blanche: Mariette Rissenbeek on German Women Cinematographers, which mostly features films from the last 15 years but many which never have received U.S. theatrical releases.

EGYPTIAN THEATRE (LA)

Big weekend for Albert Finney fans as Albert Finney Remembered presents a few fantastic double features including Two for the Road (1967) and Alan Parker’s Shoot the Moon (1982) on Thursday, the Coens’ Miller’s Crossing (1990) and John Huston’s Under the Volcano (1984) on Friday and Tom Jones (1963) and Tim Burton’s Big Fish (2003) on Sunday. The Egyptian’s big event for the weekend is the 7-movie day-long Boris Karloff-Bela Lugosi Movie Marathonon Saturday, which will include Frankenstein, Dracula but some lesser-seen classics like The Raven (1935) and more. If I lived in L.A., this is where I would be on Saturday.

AERO (LA):

The AERO continues its Hitchcock, Truffaut and Jones series with double features Hitchcock’s The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956) and Truffaut’s 1968 film The Bride Wore Black (which I’ve actually seen fairly recently!) on Friday, and Rear Window (1954)and Mississippi Mermaid (1969) on Saturday. The theater will also have an all-day screening of Sergey Bondarchuk’s 7-hour epic adaptation of War and Peace (1967) in four parts with two brief intermissions.

QUAD CINEMA (NYC):

The Quad’s still a month away from its 2-year restoration anniversary, but they’re reshowing Bertrand Blier’s Going Places and Luis Bunuel’s Tristana this coming weekend. The former is also part of Amour or Less: A Blier Buffet, a retrospective of the French filmmaker who I’m not even remotely familiar with. (Sorry!) They’re showing eight of Blier’s films before the new 40thanniversary restoration of his 1978 film Get Out Your Hankerchiefs opens on Friday, March 15.

IFC CENTER (NYC)

While Weekend Classics: Early Godard seems to be taking a weekend off, Waverly Midnights: The Feds is screening the Wayan Brothers’ White Girls (2004) in a 35mm print! Late Night Favorites takes a break from showing Ridley Scott’s Alien (which celebrates its 40th anniversary this month!) to show David Lynch’s Eraserhead (1977).

BAM CINEMATEK (NYC):

Premiering at BAM on Friday (as well as the Laemmle Glendale in L.A.) is the U.S. premiere of a restoration of Franco Rocco’s 1980 film Babylon, which was banned from the New York Film Festival and never released in the United States. Written by Martin Stellman (Quadrophenia), it stars Brinsley Forde from reggae group Aswad as a dancehall DJ who fights again racism and xenophobia in Thatcher-era London.

MUSEUM OF THE MOVING IMAGE (NYC):

See It Big! Costumes by Edith Head concludes this weekend with screenings of Hitchcock’s The Birds (1963) and Marnie (1964).

LANDMARK THEATRES NUART (LA):

The Nuart’s Friday midnight screening is George Miller’s Mad Max: Fury Road Black & Chrome Edition (2015).

STREAMING AND CABLE

Season 1 of Ricky Gervais’ new series After Life will debut on Netflix starting Friday, but there are also a few new movies including Clark Johnson’s Juanita, starring Alfre Woodard as the mother of three who goes on a trip to Montana, plus there’s Conor Allyn’s Walk. Ride. Rodeo., an inspirational drama that tells the true story of Amberley Snyder, played by Spencer Locke from the Resident Evil series, a 19-year-old rodeo rider who barely survives a car crash that leaves her paralyzed from the waist down. So yeah, Netflix is even trying to sidetrack Brie Larson’s Captain Marvel rerelease with other female-led films just like they’re going to try to derail Warners’ Shazam! with Brie Larson’s directorial debut Unicorn Store next month. The struggle continues.

Now available for digital download is Joe Eddy’s Steve McQueen biopic Chasing Bullitt (Vertical), starring Andre Brooks as the legendary actor who in 1971 makes a deal with his agent to let him choose his next acting gig if he finds his Ford Mustang GT 390 from Bullitt. Also available digitally is Dallas King’s action-thriller Kiss Kiss (Cleopatra Entertainment) that follows four strippers who go to a wine tasting that turns into a female fight night. I didn’t make this movie up, but apparently, it’s counter-programming to Captain Marvel.

LOCAL FESTIVALS

On Thursday, the Museum of the Moving Image is presenting the 6thannual Philip K. Dick Science Fiction Film Festival with two programs of short films. Also on Thursday, the IFC Center will kick off Canada Now 2019 with Nicholas de Pencier and Edward Burtynsky’s new doc Anthropocene: The Human Epoch, another globe-crossing from the duo behind Manufactured Landscapes. There will also be other Canadian films that have played in various film festivals north of the border.

Oh, yeah, also South by Southwest is happening in Austin, but I’m not going, so…

That’s it for this week. Next week, Captain Marvel will probably be #1 again, but there are a few other movies hoping at least for second place.

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go-redgirl · 4 years

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Remarks by President Trump During a Roundtable on Transition to Greatness: Restoring, Rebuilding, and Renewing | Dallas, TX whitehouse.gov ^ | June 12, 2020 | President Donald J Trump and others

Gateway Church Dallas Campus Dallas, Texas

3:43 P.M. CDT

THE PRESIDENT: Nice place. Wow. I’ve been hearing about this one. Great job. (Laughter.) Great job. Thank you very much for being here. It’s an honor. And very important time in our country. A lot of things are happening. And I think when it all ends up, it’s going to end up very good for everybody.

It’s an honor to be at Gateway Church with the Attorney General — our great Attorney General, William Barr. Thank you. (Applause.) And my friend, Ben Carson, who’s done a fantastic job at HUD. Secretary. (Applause.) And a young star, Jerome Adams, General. Where is Jerome? Jerome? (Applause.) Along with a lot of my friends out in the audience. In fact, a lot of the great political leaders from Texas, I see. Some great, great friends.

And I want to thank you all for being here: faith leaders; members of law enforcement, so important. We want law and order. We have to have a lot of good things, but we have to have law and order. (Applause.)

Got to have some strength. You have to have strength. You have to do what you have to do. And you look at a Seattle — we just came in; we just see over the screen, and we’ve been hearing about it. Bill and I were talking about it: the law and order. Look at what happened in Seattle: They took over a city. A city. A big city — Seattle. Took a chunk of it — a big chunk. Can’t happen. That couldn’t happen here, I don’t think, in the state of Texas, could it? (Laughter.) I don’t think so. (Applause.) I don’t think so.

So I want to thank Pastors Robert Morris and Steve Dulin. They’re great people. (Applause.) Great people with a great reputation. I have to say that. Great reputation. And Gateway Church — the team has been incredible in hosting us.

And I’d now like to ask Pastor Morris and Bishop Jackson to lead us in prayer. Thank you.

PASTOR MORRIS: Thank you.

Lord, we need you. We need you at this time in our country. And I thank you for our President. I thank you, Lord, for our leaders. I thank you, thank you, thank you.

I know in the Bible that, when something was emphasized, it was repeated: “holy, holy, holy.” Thank you, thank you, thank you, Lord, that we are about to bring tremendous progress to a problem that’s been here for a long time. And I thank you for this administration. And, Lord, we pray your blessings and your guidance today on this meeting, in Jesus name.

BISHOP JACKSON: Father, we thank you so much for what you’re doing today. You have revealed so many things that are untoward, even evil. But we ask, according to Isaiah 50, verse 4, that you would give us the tongue of the learned that we should know how to speak to the heart of this nation.

Give us a word in season to Him that’s weary, and waken us morning by morning, God, that we would hear and speak. We have a great, courageous President who’s a problem solver. And let him speak as your mouthpiece and act as your instrument. And we thank you for this time. Amen.

AUDIENCE: Amen. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much, Bishop. Thank you. Thank you very much. I want to thank you, Bishop, and thank you very much, Pastor. That’s great. And we’re going to be discussing some pretty important things today, I think. It’s all important, but the timing of this is very appropriate. This was set up, actually, a long time ago, but the timing is very appropriate.

We are here to listen to community and faith leaders — going to be hearing from a lot of the good ones; some of the great ones, but a lot of the good ones — and to present our vision of advancing the cause of justice and freedom.

From day one, I’ve been fighting for the forgotten men and women of America, and I think we’ve been doing a great job of it. We’ve been doing a lot in many other ways, but it gets lost a little bit sometimes. Bishop, you know that. It gets lost. We’ve done so much. And a lot of the things that we’ve done that we’re very proud of gets lost. Like, we got criminal justice reform passed, and they’ve been trying to do it for many years — (applause) — and they haven’t been able to do get it passed.

We secured permanent and record-setting funding for HBCUs. That’s historically black colleges and universities. (Applause.) It’s all done.

We created tens of thousands of jobs with Opportunity Zones. Tim Scott. And we had a great senator from South Carolina that many of you know. He came with an idea, and I thought it was a great idea, and we got it done. A lot of people said that could never happen, but nobody thought it would be successful like it is. Tens of thousands of jobs and investment in communities where that money wouldn’t go.

And we achieved the lowest black unemployment in the history of our country, prior to the plague coming in from China. (Applause.) And we’ll get it back again soon. It’ll happen soon. That’ll happen very soon.

In recent days, there have been vigorous discussion about how to ensure fairness, equality, and justice for all of our people. Unfortunately, there are some trying to stoke division and to push an extreme agenda, which we won’t go for, that will produce only more poverty, more crime, more suffering. This includes radical efforts to defund, dismantle, and disband the police. They want to get rid of the police forces. They actually want to get rid of it. And that’s what they do, and that’s where they go. And you know that, because at the top position, there’s not going to be much leadership; there’s not much leadership left.

Instead, we have to go the opposite way. We must invest more energy and resources in police training and recruiting and community engagement. We have to respect our police. We have to take care of our police. They’re protecting us. And if they’re allowed to do their job, they’ll do a great job. And you always have a bad apple, no matter where you go. You have bad apples. And there are not too many of them. And I can tell you there are not too many of them in the police department. We all know a lot of members of the police.

I was listening today; a friend of mine was on. A very important person said some of the best people he’s ever met are policemen, law enforcement people. And they’re taking care of people that, in many cases, they never even met before, and at great danger, at great risk. They get shot for no reason whatsoever, other than they’re wearing blue. They get knifed. You saw that the other night. It was a horrible thing.

But there is no opportunity without safety. In Chicago, 48 people were shot, and 18 people were killed in one day. Sunday, May 31st. Think of that. Forty-eight people shot; eighteen people killed. You don’t hear about it too much.

Every child should be able to grow up in a safe community, free from violence and fear. They’ve taken a lot of the police protection away in Chicago, and they have great, great police in Chicago. I know Chicago very well, but they’re not allowed to do what they can do better than anybody. They could do the job very easily.

Americans are good and virtuous people. We have to work together to confront bigotry and prejudice wherever they appear. But we’ll make no progress and heal no wounds by falsely labeling tens of millions of decent Americans as racists or bigots. We have to get everybody together. We have to be on the same — the same path, I think, Pastor. If we don’t do that, we have — we have problems. And we’ll do that. We’ll do it. I think we’re going to do it very easily. It’ll go quickly and it’ll go — it’ll go very easily.

We have so many different elements of strength in this country. We have such potential in this country. We have the greatest potential. We have the greatest country in the world. But we get off subject. We start thinking about things that don’t matter or don’t matter much. And the important things, we don’t even discuss. But we’re here to discuss some very important things.

Today, politicians make false charges, and they’re trying to distract from their own failed records. They have some very bad records. And these are usually the ones that cause the problems or can’t solve the problems. These are the same politicians who shipped our jobs away and took tremendous advantage of all Americans. But African American middle class — so much of that wealth and that money and those jobs went to China and other countries. And they get trapped. They get trapped. They get trapped in a government morass. They get trapped in bad government schools.

So I’m going to be announcing four steps to build safety and opportunity and dignity:

First, we’re aggressively pursuing economic development in minority communities. We’re doing it very powerfully. We’ve done it with Opportunity Zones, but we’re going to go above that. At the heart of this effort is increasing access to capital for small businesses, and that’s with minority owners in black communities. And we’re going to get it done, and it should have been done a long time ago. It’s been very difficult — very, very difficult for some people. It’s been unfairly difficult.

Second, we are confronting the healthcare disparities, including addressing chronic conditions and investing substantial sums in minority-serving medical institutions. We have medical institutions in some areas of our country that are a disgrace. I was going to say “not up to standard.” They’re much worse than “not up to standard.” They’re a disgrace. We’ll take care of it.

Third, we’re working to finalize an executive order that will encourage police departments nationwide to meet the most current professional standards for the use of force, including tactics for de-escalation.

Also, we’ll encourage pilot programs that allow social workers to join certain law enforcement officers so that they work together.

We’ll take care of our police. We’ll take — we’re not defunding police. If anything, we’re going the other route: We’re going to make sure that our police are well trained — perfectly trained, they have the best equipment. (Applause.)

Some of the things that we have heard — because I know a lot of the people in the audience, and they’re professionals at what they do, and they’re successful people, and we’re hearing things that are not even thinkable. I didn’t even hear — I’ve never even heard of this before last week. It was like — it started about a week ago, where I heard they want to close up all police forces. That’s what their attack on a very liberal governor in the state of Washington is: “We want the police force closed.”

It’s not like they want to, sort of, bring a little money into something else; they want it actually closed. I’m thinking, “What happens late at night when you make that call to 911 and there’s nobody there?” What do you have — what do you do? (Applause.) Whether you’re white, black, or anybody else, I mean, what do you do? You’re dialing, and there’s somebody breaking into a house, and it happens to be a violent person. There are violent people around, Pastor. Even you will admit that, right?

PASTOR MORRIS: Yes.

THE PRESIDENT: We want to think the best — (laughter) — but you have some very violent people. And when they’re breaking into your house at 12 o’clock in the evening, and you’re sitting there, and you don’t have a police force, they’re actually think- — they’re actually talking about not having a police force. Well, that’s not happening with us. We’re going to have stronger police forces because that’s what you need.

In Minneapolis, they went through three nights of hell. And then I was insistent on having the National Guard go in and do their work. It was like a miracle. It just — everything stopped. And I’ll never forget the scene. It’s not supposed to be a beautiful scene, but, to me, it was — after you watch policemen running out of a police precinct.

And it wasn’t their fault. They wanted to do what they had to do, but they weren’t allowed to do anything. It wasn’t really their fault. But they were running down the street. They weren’t allowed to do what they’re trained to do. And they took over the precinct. They burned it — essentially burned it down. I’m pretty good at construction. I want to tell you: That was almost what we call a complete renovation, if you’re lucky. (Laughter.)

And it was a very sad thing. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like that.

But we are very proud of the fact that I called — I said, “I’m sorry. We have to have them go in.” And they went in, and it was like a knife cutting butter — right through. Boom. I’ll never forget. You saw the scene: on that road, wherever it may be, in the city — Minneapolis. They were lined up. Boom — they just walked straight. And, yes, there was some tear gas and probably some other things, and the crowd dispersed, and they went through it. By the end of that evening — and it was a short evening — everything was fine and you didn’t hear too much about that location having problems anymore; they went to other locations.

And the same thing would happen. As an example, Seattle would be so easy to solve. It would be so easy to solve. We have a governor here of a great state; it’s called Texas. He would solve it very easily — (applause) — as would — as would other of your — as would other of your political leaders, including your lieutenant governor. They would solve it very easily.

It’s — a lot of it is common sense. I don’t even think it’s courage. I think it’s probably more courageous the other way, because I wouldn’t want to be doing it the other way. It’s very unsafe.

So I just want to tell you that we’re working on a lot of different elements having to do with law, order, safety, comfort, control. But we want safety. We want compassion. We want everything.

What happened two weeks ago was a disgrace when you see that. What happened on numerous occasions over the last two weeks — people were killed. A number of people were killed and it was very, very terrible and very, very unfair. A number of them were police officers. And it was a very unfair situation. We don’t want to see that.

And with strength, you wouldn’t even have that. They wouldn’t be in a position to do the kind of damage that they’ve done. They’ve destroyed people. They’ve destroyed businesses. They’ve destroyed African-American-owned small businesses that, hopefully, they’re going to come back. We’re providing funding for a lot of small businesses, and hopefully we’ll be able to get everybody online and get funding to be able to open up their stores and their small businesses again.

But we’re working to finalize an executive order that will encourage police departments nationwide to meet the most current professional standards of force. And that means force, but force with compassion. But if you’re going to have to really do a job — if somebody is really bad, you’re going to have to do it with real strength, real power.

And I said — and people said, “Oh, I don’t know if we like that expression.” I said, “We have to dominate the streets.” You can’t let that happen, what happened in New York City — the damage they’ve done. You have to dominate the streets. (Applause.)

And I was criticized for that statement. I made the statements, “We have to dominate the street.” And they said, “Oh that’s such a terrible thing.” Well, guess what? You know who dominated the streets? People that you don’t want to dominate the streets, and look at the damage they did.

So I’ll stick with that, and I think most of the people in this room — maybe every person in this room — will stick with that. And we’re doing it with compassion, if you think about it. We’re dominating the street with compassion, because we’re saving lives and we’re saving businesses. We’re saving families from being wiped out after working hard for 20 and 30 years. I saw the one woman: She worked 35 years building a store, and in one night, in was totally wiped out. It’s terrible.

And, fourth, we’re renewing our call on Congress to finally enact school choice now. School choice is a big deal — (applause) — because access to education is the civil rights issue of our time. And I’ve heard that for the last, I would say, year. But it really is; it’s the civil rights issue of our time. When you can have children go to a school where their parents want them to go. And it creates competition. And other schools fight harder because, all of a sudden, they say, “Wow. We’re losing it. We have to fight hard.” It gets better in so many different ways.

But there are groups of people against that. You have unions against it. You have others against it. And they’re not against it for the right reasons. They’re against it for a lot of the wrong reasons. And we’re going to get that straightened out. Now, we’ve done a lot of it. We’ve had tremendous success with choice.

We had choice in a lot of ways. We also have choice in the military. You know, before I came here, the vets would wait on line, Pastor. They’d be waiting — you — it wouldn’t be acceptable to you. I know it wouldn’t be acceptable to the Bishop. I know it’s not going to be acceptable to you. They’d wait for four or five weeks to get on line — a vet — where they were sick. They were feeling badly, and they’d get on line, and they’d say, “There’s a six-day wait, sir.” “There’s a two-week wait.” “There’s a one-month wait.” And you’d have people on line that weren’t very ill, and they’d be terminally ill before they got to see a doctor, and they’d die.

And for years and years, they’ve been trying to get Veterans Choice. That means if you can’t get to a doctor reasonably quickly, you go outside, you go to a local doctor around where you live, and the government pays the bill. And, by the way, it sounds expensive; it’s very cheap, by comparison. It’s actually much better. Now, most importantly, we take care of our vets. By far, most importantly. (Applause.)

But it’s one of those many cases where it’s actually less costly and better. Sometimes you’ll see a building — it costs less money than another building that costs more, because the one that built the one that cost more, this one looks better. The one that’s cheaper, it looks better. They say, “How much more did you spend for that building?” Actually, we spent less. You can do that. It’s called: “You have to know what you’re doing” — (laughter) — if you know what you’re doing. That’s only good for the real estate people in here, of which there are plenty, by the way.

So I just want to thank everybody. This is a tremendous place. This is a great city. This is a great, great city and with tremendous people and tremendous pride. And I say the same for the state of Texas. You know, your governor came to me, and he said — when you had your bad hurricane two years ago, I gave so much money to Texas. More — he kept coming: “More.” (Laughter.) “How about here? How about…”

So, finally, you know, though, we took good care of Texas. Is that right?

PASTOR MORRIS: Yes, sir.

THE PRESIDENT: We took such good care of Texas. They were looking for the next hurricane. They said, “When’s the next hurricane?” (Laughter and applause.) But they had a big one. And they say you had the largest water dump ever. It just didn’t stop. It came in, and you thought it was gone, and then it went back out and it reloaded, right? And it happened three times.

And your governor came, and he wanted to build a barrier so that water would hit the barrier, it wouldn’t come into certain parts of Texas. He called me, he said, “Sir, I just have one more request.” This is after we gave $28 billion. So, $28 billion. I mean, we watch the pennies, but when it comes to Texas, we don’t watch them too closely, okay? (Laughter and applause.)

And he said — Governor Abbott — he said, “Just one more request, and it’s a very small one, sir. We have a way of building a wall. It goes up and down. It moves with the tides.” I said, “That sounds expensive to me.” “It moves with the tides, and it’s not a lot of money. Could I ask you to do me one small favor and approve it?” I said, “How much is it?” “Sir, it’s only $10 billion.” (Laughter.) And I said, “Start working on it.” Right? I said, “Start working on it,” because we can do things to get rid of those.

You have some — you get hit pretty hard here. They get hit pretty hard here, don’t they? Were you affected very much when you had — during the hurricanes itself?

PASTOR MORRIS: We had a lot of people who were displaced that came to this area.

THE PRESIDENT: Yeah. Well, we took good care of everybody.

PASTOR MORRIS: Yes, you did.

THE PRESIDENT: So, I just want to say this is one of my favorite places. I know we’re doing very well here.

During the last process, they kept saying that Texas was too close to call. And friends of mine in Texas would say, “It’s not too close to call. You’re going to win in a landslide.” And I said, “Well, they keep saying…” — (applause). They had — one man got on television, actually, and he said, “I don’t know where you come from, but I don’t think this is too close to call. I think he’s going to win by a lot.” We won by a lot. It was eight o’clock and the polls were closed. And they said, “Donald Trump has won the state of Texas.” (Applause.) And he said it simultaneously. So —

And we’re doing good here again, but, you know, one of the things, I have to say — because this is big oil territory — I think we’ve done a fantastic job with bringing back the oil in a rapid fashion. That looked pretty bad. That’d look pretty bad. (Applause.)

You had a case — you had a couple of hours where if you bought a barrel of oil, you bought it for $37 — as if they gave you $37. Okay? There’s never been a thing like that ever. And now I see that it’s getting close to $40 a barrel and you’re back in business, and we got it done fast and we got Russia together with Saudi Arabia, and they cut production. And they got it back fast, and we’re very, very proud of it.

The supply changed rapidly with COVID-19, or whatever you want to call it. I had never heard so many names. You have about 30 names you can call this thing. (Laughter.) All I — I call it “the plague from China.” (Laughter.) “The plague.” (Laughter and applause.) And it’s not good. And it’s not good. And it’s — it could have been stopped. It could have been stopped in China, but they decided not to do that. And we’ll have to figure that one out, won’t we?

So I just want to thank everybody very much for being here. This is a very spectacular place. And I want to introduce Attorney General Barr and Secretary Carson to say a few words, along with the Surgeon General, who has been a real young star in the administration. And, please, if I could, Bill? Take over, please. Thank you very much.

ATTORNEY GENERAL BARR: Thank you, Mr. President. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you.

ATTORNEY GENERAL BARR: Thank you, Mr. President, and thank you for convening this discussion. And I’d like to thank the many impressive leaders — civic leaders, religious leaders, and colleagues from law enforcement — who are here.

That ghastly spectacle in Minneapolis was really jarring to the whole nation, and it forced us to confront and think about, reflect on longstanding issues in our nation. Those issues obviously relate to the relationship between law enforcement and the African American community.

But just to step back a little and take a broader view initially, I’ve been thinking about how do we achieve the full American Dream for all communities. African American communities, all communities. And one of the reasons I’m proud to serve in this administration is because I think the President is moving forward on the critical elements necessary to provide and ensure that opportunity.

First and foremost, economic growth. Without growth, there is no opportunity. Second — (applause) — second, education. I think Condi Rice said a few years ago it’s the civil rights issue of our time. Because without a good education, they are not allowing our young people to seize their opportunities and pursue their dreams. (Applause.)

And as the President mentioned, it’s only by empowering parents and giving them the power to choose the education for their children that we’re ever going to be able to obtain that.

Third, I think, is moral discipline. And our young people, they have to have the discipline to seize the opportunity, to make momentary sacrifices for later gain. And traditionally, that has come — and people can find it, perhaps, from many sources — but traditionally that has come from religion, which our founders believed was the foundation of our republic. And — (applause) — and we — we have to stop policies that undermine religion or relegate religion out of the public square. (Applause.)

But now I get to my job, which is safety. Without safety you cannot have progress. You can’t have a life — a decent life in a community. And, you know, this was struck home to me 30 years ago when I visited Trenton when I was Attorney General last time, and I went to a small barber shop in an African American neighborhood. And there were people there in their 60s and 70s, and they said, “Mr. Barr, we’re in our golden years, and we are living behind bars. Look down the street. All the bars are on our windows, and the criminals run free on the street.”

Now, we’ve made a lot of progress since then; the crime rate has been cut in half. And a big part of that has been improvement in policing, and the progress we’ve made in policing, and, yes, the progress that police have made — police departments have made in building relationships with the community.

I think law enforcement has understood for a long time that there is distrust in the African American community toward the law enforcement system. And when you reflect on our history, you could understand why: Because for most of our history, just up until the last 60 years, the institutions in this country — the laws and the institutions were explicitly discriminatory. There was not equal protection of the law, by law. And it’s only been since Jim Crow that our laws have been changed to provide for equal justice.

And what we’ve had, really, since — and so the Civil Rights effort, up until that time, was to tear down institutions. But I don’t think now is the time to be tearing down our institutions, because we’ve been on a march for the last 50 years of reforming our institutions, and we don’t need to tear them down. We have to be mature about this, and when we see problems, we have to redouble our efforts to reform our institutions and make sure they’re in sync with our values.

And I don’t think anyone who’s honest would deny that we’ve made a lot of progress in policing over the last 50 years. And, in fact, you know, one of the things about this episode in Minneapolis was how fast both the state and federal law enforcement responded to — to dealing with — with that action.

So I think that, while we saw something very bad, it has helped perhaps galvanize the will of the country to bring good out of that. And we can’t let that incident obscure the fact that progress has been made; that policemen are, by and large, by overwhelming majority, good, decent people who care about their community and put their lives on the line for us, their neighbors. (Applause.) And we can’t lose sight of the fact and can’t let this event obscure the fact that the — the real oppression and danger to our communities comes more from violent crime and lawlessness than it does from the police. (Applause)

Now, we’ve never — we’ve never had — we’ve never had a President who is more committed to reforming law enforcement. And he’s done that with the FIRST STEP Act and with the first police commission since Lyndon Johnson. And I’m very optimistic about, you know, what we’re going to be able to do — given his leadership, but also given the leadership of our police forces, which around the country increasingly have become better and better led.

And the — I think the police profession is itself committed to addressing the issues that we saw in Minneapolis and completing the process of professionalizing policing in this country.

And, as the President said, we’re working on a number of things through the commission that he set up and also through an executive order to propel that process even faster by looking at how we can encourage the adoption of guidelines about the use of force that are acceptable, both to the community and to the — and to the police profession, but also to encourage certification of police forces, and also through such activities as increasing grants to encourage the use of co-responders.

More and more, our police are being asked to deal with problems that — that, you know, hasn’t previously been the problem of law enforcement. They have to deal with homeless people. They have to deal with a lot of mental health issues. They have to deal with, you know, drug addiction, the drug addicts, and so forth. And providing some additional support to the police in these areas is going to be important.

So let me just say that the Department of Justice is committed to support the President’s efforts here, do all we can to bring good out of this bad incident.

Thank you. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you, Bill. Thank you.

Surgeon General, please go ahead. Do you want to go?

SURGEON GENERAL ADAMS: Secretary Carson is going to go.

THE PRESIDENT: Go ahead. Why don’t you go, and then Ben will go? Is that okay?

SURGEON GENERAL ADAMS: All right.

THE PRESIDENT: Good. Go ahead.

SURGEON GENERAL ADAMS: Well, thank you, Mr. President. I appreciate it. (Applause.) Thank you, everyone, for coming today. Thank you to the panelists.

I just want to start off by saying that many people across the country and across the great state of Texas are hurting right now due to the tragedy that occurred to George Floyd. And I just want to extend my condolences to the Floyd family and to the entire Texas community, because I know that you all live together, you work together, you play together, and you hurt together here in Texas. And so, I want you to know that I feel that for you. (Applause.)

The President asked me to give you a quick update on America’s COVID-19 response. Thanks to cooperation with state and local partners, we’re making progress against the virus — we are — and towards a safe reopening.

Through strong public and private partnerships, America has now done more than 20 million tests. And that number is a big number. It’s not just about the number; it’s also about how many of those tests are coming back positive. We have a positive rate under 6 percent nationally. And from a public health perspective, if we’re under 10 percent positive, we’re doing a good job.

So there’s a lot of challenges out there, but I want you all to know that we are moving in the right direction. The data shows that we are moving in the right direction as a nation.

And this has happened, in part, thanks to opening of over 500 community-based testing sites through the work of private sector partners and the United States Public Health Service, which I helped lead with Admiral Giroir. Seventy percent of those sites are in CDC-designated vulnerable areas. That means that we’re taking the testing to those who need it the most, to those who are most at risk. We also have testing at 92 percent of America’s community health centers, which predominantly serve low-income areas and communities of color.

We’ve helped equip our frontline workers, our healthcare heroes, with 94 million N95 respirators, 149 million surgical masks, and more than a billion gloves. And a large proportion of those supplies, at the President and the Secretary’s direction, are going to nursing homes.

And I just want to — I see the governor over there. I want to give you all a shout-out. Texas has led the way in nursing home testing. A hundred percent of their nursing homes have been tested. They’re leading the way in testing people in corrections facilities. Over 95 percent of people in corrections facilities have been tested. And that is something you all should be tremendously proud of. (Applause.)

And these efforts have allowed states to proceed with a safe reopening, while we work with states to monitor the incoming data. We know we’re going to have clusters, but while we respond to spikes, and we adjust policies as needed.

But I want you to know that safe reopening is crucial for other areas in health too. We need Americans to be able to return to cancer screenings. My wife just finished cancer treatment. If she’d had to wait six months to get her cancer screened, she might not be here today. We need people to get their surgeries. We need people to get their vaccinations. 4.2 million children are behind on vaccinations now because of the COVID closures. We know every 1 percent increase in unemployment equates to a 1.3 percent increase in suicides. 1.3 percent increase in suicides.

So we want to reopen safely. We also have to remember that being shut down has health consequences beyond COVID. We know that being out of school is bad for your health. We need to get our kids back in school safely. (Laughter and applause.) I have a 15-, a 14-, and a 10-year-old. And so, can you tell I’ve been saying that a lot? (Laughter.)

But we know that COVID-19 has a tragically disproportionate burden on communities of color: Black Americans hospitalized at 4.5 times higher rates than whites; hospitalization rates 3.5 times higher for Hispanics than whites and five times higher for American Indians and Alaskan Natives.

The fact is this virus is exploiting and exacerbating preexisting health disparities. And these disparate outcomes and opportunities for health are, in part, the anger, the frustration, and the fear that we’re seeing manifest in protests around the country.

And that’s why it’s important for people to know that, beyond talking about the problem, at the President’s direction, at Secretary Azar’s direction, HHS and the White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council, or WHORC, are focusing resources on minority communities.

HHS recently allocated $15 billion to Medicaid providers and $10 billion to safety net hospitals, both groups of providers that disproportionately serve Americans of color. And I spent the last 10 years working at a safety net hospital –Eskenazi Hospital in Indianapolis. I can tell you those are the places that are doing the work. Those are the places that, at President’s direction, we’re focusing our resources towards.

We’re working with a consortium — with the consortium of black medical schools to fund and scale local efforts in communities that, again, reach communities of color. CDC now requires all testing data reported by states include information on race, ethnicity, and zip code so we can continue to further refine and focus our strategy on the hardest-hit communities.

CMS is deregulating telemedicine to make ongoing care for many medical conditions safe, accessible, and convenient for the patients and for healthcare professionals. Again, we can’t afford to let people continue to go without their care. And the administration’s emphasis on public-private partnerships is allowing us to progress towards a vaccine and treatments at a record pace as a part of Operation Warp Speed.

I want to add that SAMHSA has just funded three community behavioral health clinics right here in Texas with the CARES Act funding. Some of your congressional representatives are here. I want to say thank you to you all for passing that and to the President for signing it to address COVID-19 and behavioral health needs. These facilities integrate mental health, substance abuse treatment, and physical healthcare in one setting, and provide 24/7 crisis intervention services.

Another notable Mental Health Awareness Training grant is in Austin, where funds are used to train community health officials, including law enforcement. And we have many of them in the crowd today on recognizing signs and symptoms of mental illness and mental health crises, and how to help an individual who’s struggling. That’s all part of — of reform. That’s all part of reform in the positive direction, giving our frontline workers the tools and the training they need to be able to take care of these difficult situations.

As Mayor Sylvester Turner said at George Floyd’s funeral, we must encourage business leaders to invest in our underserved communities. And that’s what the White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council is all about. I have a upcoming Surgeon General’s report on community health and economic prosperity, which aims to mobilize businesses to invest deeply and over time in the health of their communities.

Finally, to focus on chronic conditions that disproportionately impact black and brown people and may worsen because of COVID, Secretary Azar has instructed my office to accelerate the release of two calls to action: the first on maternal health — addressing the fact that women of color suffer more complications and a much higher risk of dying around childbirth. Black women are four to five times more likely to die around childbirth than white women. Native American women are more likely to die around childbirth than white women. And that’s after you control for income, after you control for education, after you control for every known factor that we — that we have.

My second call to action is on hypertension control for all Americans. Hypertension is common, it’s costly, and it’s treatable. And yet, control rates are low and stalled, especially in communities of color.

So I just want to close by saying that, as we reopen, the basic public health recommendations we’ve emphasized remain important. We flattened the curve, but that doesn’t mean that COVID has gone away, that it’s any less contagious, that it’s any less deadly to vulnerable communities.

So if you don’t want to listen to me, listen to Hall of Fame pitcher Nolan Ryan. Nolan Ryan filmed a PSA at the governor’s direction. And he said, number one, wash your hands. Wash them more than you’ve ever watched them before in your life.

Number two, follow your local and state guidelines around social distancing. This virus likes to spread person to person. So the more we can keep distance between people, especially people we don’t know, the harder it is for this virus to transmit.

And number three — this isn’t me speaking; this is Nolan Ryan, Hall of Fame pitcher here. (Laughter.) When you’re in a public place where it’s difficult to keep a distance, like the grocery or pharmacy, the CDC recommends wearing a face covering to protect your neighbors in the event that you have COVID and you don’t know it. Up to 50 percent of people who have COVID are asymptomatic.

So thanks to the hard work of so many healthcare and public health professionals and the commitment of the American people, I want to reiterate, because you don’t hear this enough, that we are making huge progress in the fight against COVID-19. And as a member of the task force, I can tell you that we frequently talk about the great work Texas has been doing up until this point to keep the people of Texas safe, to keep the most vulnerable members of their community safe. And with every American’s help, with your help, Texas, we’ll keep making progress. We’re going to beat this virus.

And thank you for the opportunity, Mr. President. Thank you, Texas. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much, Surgeon General. Thank you. (Applause.)

Ben Carson? Please, Ben.

SECRETARY CARSON: Okay. Well, thank you, Mr. President, for your leadership and your courage. I don’t know of anybody who could stand up to all the criticism you get every day, 24 –(applause) —

THE PRESIDENT: Do we have a choice? Thank you.

SECRETARY CARSON: You know, our nation is continuing a path of renewal and recovery from the coronavirus pandemic. But since the beginning, the President has talked about being a champion for the forgotten men and women of this nation. And that’s exactly where we’ve been concentrating. And it’s been an honor to serve in an administration with that goal. And I’m excited to see America beginning to bounce back.

The infrastructure — the economic infrastructure of our country is very strong, secondary to the abolition of multitudinous regulations and targeted tax cuts. It’s still there. That foundation is there, and we will be able to get back on that track pretty quickly.

But to help speed this rebound, the White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council was formed to really help the long-forgotten communities achieve economic opportunity. And it has been refocused, at your direction, to help America’s hardest-hit communities achieve economic recovery, overcome health disparities, and thrive through educational and workforce advancement.

Now, to stimulate economic development and entrepreneurship, the council has worked to set aside additional payment protection funding for our nation’s low-income minority communities and provided technical support to help these communities to access this funding. They have stated that, during the first round, the money wasn’t getting to them. We are addressing that, and I want to thank all the different agencies. Virtually every governmental agency has contributed significantly to refocusing and addressing these problems.

The groundbreaking initiative known as Opportunity Zones, which encourages long-term investment in the forgotten communities, will also be expanded to include more of the underserved areas.

Another major initiative — improving health and public safety — comes with several administrative and legislative proposals. For example, we believe both telemedicine and increased use of mobile care can be major catalysts in our mission to overcome health disparities in underserved communities.

Those are things that can actually be done very rapidly to bring healthcare to people who’ve previously been neglected. And to further this effort, we’re also committed to reforming the infrastructure of our public health data system, addressing chronic conditions in at-risk populations, and working to address food insecurity in underserved communities. That means healthy foods at reasonable prices that are accessible.

But one of the things that I just mentioned — the data collection — we have 50 states and we have territories, and Washington, D.C., and we have all of those many different healthcare collection systems. And we are working to homogenize all of that. And we’ll make it much easier for us to identify quickly health issues and to be able to address them very quickly.

Other legislative proposals, such as advancing national broadband access and investment in minority-serving medical institutions, will also play a major role in improving the wellbeing of these forgotten communities. Making sure that we have broadband access will give access to remote learning.

We will have the possibility of taking the very best biology teacher, and instead of putting them in front of 30 students, putting them in front of a million students, so that those students who have been neglected during all this time and relegated to places where they’re not getting an appropriate education will be able to access those things.

But to guarantee the fruits of these efforts and that they’re long lasting, we understand the need to go for it with a long-term view through our focus on education and workforce development. Education and workforce development is what leads to real independence for people.

And the council supports empowering disadvantaged students with dual-enrollment opportunities, the creation of new short-term education and career pathways, and increased access to capital for our nation’s HBCUs.

School choice measures, presidential scholarships, and Second Chance Pell grants to reintegrate formerly incarcerated individuals are initiatives that will prove valuable investments in our country’s human capital. And we must remember these innovative new approaches in education and workforce development are nothing less than an investment in our future.

We only have 330 million people in this country. Sounds like a lot of people, but compared to China, it’s a quarter of what they have; India, it’s a quarter of what they have. And we have to compete with them in the future. So we need to develop all of our people.

And, you know, education, in particular, played a big role in my development. I was not a particularly good student — and that’s putting it mildly. Everybody thought I was stupid, except my mother. (Laughter.) She was always saying, “Benjamin, you can bring home much better grades than this.” But I would agree that I could, but I didn’t.

But interestingly enough, you know, my mother studied the homes of the — that she cleaned as a domestic. She came from nothing — my mother. Twenty-four, children, got married when she was 13, dire poverty, discovered her husband was a bigamist. But she was still smart enough to study those people who had these beautiful homes. And she figured that the reason they did so well is because they were well educated and they read a lot, and they didn’t watch a lot of TV.

So she came home and imposed that on me and my brother. (Laughter.) And we were not happy campers, let me tell you. If it were today’s world, we would have called social services and they’d taken her away. (Laughter.)

But — but what a difference it made, you know, starting to focus on education, starting to read books, to read about people from lots of different backgrounds — entrepreneurs and scientists and explorers and surgeons. And I begin to recognize that the person who has the most to do with what happens to you is you. It’s not somebody else. And nobody can stop you once you decide that that is the case. (Applause.)

And that’s why, with the council, there is so much emphasis on education, because it doesn’t matter where you came from — you get a good education and you write your own ticket. And we must reject those people who are trying to prevent school choice, who are trying to prevent the presidential scholarships, all the things that are there to empower people. And you will see a lot of that coming out of this administration.

And, you know, these investments and innovation give me a tremendous amount of hope for the future of this nation. Mr. President, under your leadership, I’m confident that the American people will emerge stronger from this pandemic and more determined than ever. And we, the people, will recognize, despite all the forces to the contrary, that we are not each other’s enemies. And — (applause) —

THE PRESIDENT: That’s great. Thank you, Ben. Boy, that was pretty good. Standing O for Ben. (Laughter.) He’s used to that. He’s used to it. Great job, Ben. He’s done a fantastic job at HUD, I have to tell you that.

How about Scott? We’ll go quick, Scott, so we get — we’ll get something, but Scott Turner is — (applause) — he’s a star. He’s a young star. Go ahead, Scott.

MR. TURNER: Well, thank you, Mr. President, and thank you for your leadership and giving me the opportunity to shepherd the White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council. And — (applause) — so, thank you.

And it’s also been a great joy to work on a daily basis with Doctor and Secretary Ben Carson. And so, Dr. Carson, thank you for your leadership and your trust and confidence in me.

I just want to deliver some good news, along with Dr. Carson and everyone on the panel. You know, oftentimes, you don’t hear about the work of Opportunity Zones, but the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act that the President signed into law in 2017 created the Opportunity Zone initiative. And the President created the Opportunity Zone Council. And that council was made up to take 18 agencies — 15 federal and 3 state and regional partners — and move in a singular motion to direct resources into our most distressed, vulnerable, forgotten communities.

And with this — (applause) — and that is — it’s a tremendous time. And so our agencies on the council direct these resources. And we found 270 action items to go directly into distressed communities to help the vulnerable people of America. And we’ve built tremendous coalitions, partnerships on the ground. We’ve been to over 60 cities. I’ve been to every one of them over the last year to visit people on the ground — education leaders, faith leaders, community leaders, business leaders, elected officials, Democrat and Republican.

See, the thing about poverty, it doesn’t care what party you are. The thing about revitalization, it doesn’t care what party you are. We’re coming together as a people for the good of the community.

And, oftentimes, you may not hear about this, but we sit and convene in such as this, with all of these stakeholders at one table to have the hard conversations: What is the pain of the community? Why is the community distressed? And what can we do together — both black and white, Democrat and Republican — and come together for the good of this community, for long-term sustainability, for generational impact?

And because of that, because of these partnerships, because of this collaboration together — and many people, all at this table, have been working together to bring about generational impacts, so long after we’re gone and history tells the story.

The Opportunity Zones is more than just a program. It’s more than just a concept. It is a mission that is to outlast all of us.

And I tell you that as you’re here — because a lot of times, people see a government program assistant check the box. This is not a government program; this is built from the grassroots, from the bottom up, to affect the people in America. (Applause.)

And lastly, Mr. President, I will say tens of billions of dollars have been invested inside of Opportunity Zones, public-private partnerships: Erie, Pennsylvania; St. Louis, Missouri; West Dallas, right here in my great home state of Texas; and other across the nation. Much money coming into our distressed communities.

And I say all that to say: Even though you don’t hear about it often, we have put our hand to the plow and our feet to the ground. And all of these things were done prior to COVID. But I want you to know that right now and post-COVID, that our spirit remains the same, that our heart is set, our face is set like flint, our mission is not done. But we’re going to need all of you to pray for us, to walk with us, to convene with us, to invest, to teach.

And so, Mr. President, thank you. Dr. Carson, thank you. And to all of my colleagues at the table, thank you for your support. It’s been a great honor. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much. That’s great. Thank you, Scott. (Applause.) Thank you, Scott. Great.

You want to go? Want to say something? Please, Pastor. Please.

PASTOR MORRIS: Well, thank you, Mr. President. I just was thinking about that, 30 years ago, I was serving as associate pastor at a small church. And I asked Bishop Harry Jackson to come and teach us on race relations, to teach us what we didn’t know, because we don’t know what we don’t know. And now, 30 years later, Bishop Harry and I are sitting on each side of the President of the United States. (Applause.)

He was concerned about healing a problem that we’ve had in our nation for a long time, but not just addressing one part of the problem, but housing — we have the Secretary of Housing, Education, Justice here. Attorney General Barr, thank you for being here. Thank you, our great governor, Governor Abbott. And I believe that we’re going to work together, and we’re going to see freedom and justice for all in America.

Thank you, Mr. President.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much. I appreciate it. (Applause.) Thank you very much. Great job you do here too. Great job.

Jack, go ahead. Please.

MR. BREWER: Thank you, Mr. President. Thank you, Pastor Morris, for offering your church. I think, right now, like any other time in our nation’s history, we need God. (Applause.) I’m praying to the Holy Spirit to put words on my mouth right now. And I want our nation to hear me: We need the fear of God. (Applause.)

Mr. President, you’re the only Republican I’ve ever voted for. (Applause.) And I don’t just say that to make you feel good. Honestly, I — that’s not my goal, man. I’m saying that because you stood up for the Word of God. And as believers, as the church, we have to pray for our President and have his back. When you raised that Bible up after those folks burnt that church — we are in a spiritual warfare. (Applause.)

We cannot fight this battle with flesh and blood. We cannot fight this battle with politics. You cannot politicize oppression.

I grew up right down the street. I looked at skinheads in the eye at 13 years old. My black father went to a KKK rally to protect me. I know what racism is. So when I hear words get thrown out about white supremacy, it eats me up, because these men aren’t white supremists [sic]. That’s not what they look like. I’m telling black kids across America right now — we always hear we don’t have black leaders: Look at this table. (Applause.) We are not as divided as our politics suggests. We are not as divided as our politics suggests.

But I’ll tell you what: This President — when I walk into my prisons, I’m blessed. I teach, in prisons across our nation, men who are broken — the most broken men in our country. Our Bible teaches us to serve those in prison. Our Bible teaches us to serve the poor. And when I walk into my class and I say, “Guys, raise your hand if you’ve gotten your sentence reduced from the FIRST STEP Act,” and every single one of them raised their hand. (Applause.) That’s because of you, Mr. President, and that’s because of policy.

But you’re brave enough to go against what everyone else has said about you. Now I’m calling on you to do more. We have a real issue in our country. And the root of it — let’s not get our eye off the enemy — the root of it is fatherlessness. (Applause.) Our kids don’t fathers.

Attorney — AG Barr, you said it earlier; you talked about pulling God out. Do we talk about education? Well, 71 percent of those kids that drop out of high school don’t have a father in the house.

We talk about criminal justice reform. You’re five times more likely to go to prison or have a run-in with the police department if you don’t have a father in the house.

We talk about healthcare. You’re four times more likely to live in poverty if you don’t have a father in the house, which means you’re going to be sicker.

We don’t have to keep looking for the problem when we see it. Now it’s time for Americans of all color — I’m calling on my white brothers and sisters; I’m calling on my Spanish brothers and sisters: Get out of your bubbles. Go into the communities that are underserved, and let’s do what Jesus told us to do. (Applause.)

We can bridge this gap of fatherlessness. All we got to do is go out of our bubbles, go bridge the gap with these kids, teach them what you teach your kids. We all have rooms in our homes for a couple — couple of boys that come in and play with our sons and daughters. Let’s bridge the gap through love and through being what we all know we are. And that’s one America. God bless America.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much. (Applause.) Anybody like to speak? Please. (Laughter.) Anybody? Who goes after that? (Laughter.)

MR. DOUGLAS: Mr. President, I’d like to speak. My name is Will Douglas. I’m the owner — (applause) — thank you. I’m the owner of Crimson Care Pharmacy Group here in Dallas, Texas, and I’m also a Republican nominee for state representative here in Texas. (Applause.)

First of all, I just want to thank your administration, as well as Congress, for getting the PPP loans, speaking on behalf of my pharmacies, as well as a dozen or so other pharmacies here in the state of Texas that benefited from those. Because of the PPP loans, I was able to not have to let any of my employees go. And, in fact, I was able to hire additional employees, because our business model had changed overnight. No longer could customers come into our store; they were having to go through the drive-through, which created a whole litany of other — of other issues. So — so, for that, thank you.

The reason why — or the reason why I’m running for office is because, to me, capitalism is the most important thing. Capitalism has created this bastion of free market enterprise that we have here in Texas, with Dallas being the crown jewel. And I’m afraid that we’re going to lose that system that lifts people out of poverty.

I was on a call with — with leaders in the black community here in Dallas the other day, and one of them said something to me that that has stuck out — or that did stuck out, and I can’t let it go. And that’s that — I think he said it was an African proverb, but that a child that is not embraced by the village will burn that village down just to feel its warmth.

As Republicans, we have to find ways to make capitalism embrace the people that it’s left behind. Because if we don’t, the next time, it won’t just be villages and businesses that are being burned down, it will be the system that has lifted so many people out of poverty. (Applause.)

MR. SMITH: So, Mr. President, I’ll be — I’ll be short. I just was going to say that — thank you so much for your leadership. And I think the infrastructure that you’ve presented today is going to help a lot of people. It’s going to touch businesses like William. It’s going to keep community safe with the partnership of these law enforcement officials and the partnership with these ministers that we have and advocates, like Jon Ponder and Jack Brewer.

And so, over the next couple of weeks, I think the American people look forward to seeing the wealth of executive orders that you’re going to issue on justice, and on economic empowerment, as well as legislative asks that we’re going to make to the Hill.

But we all need your help — every locality, every group or organization — because it’s really about bringing this all together — together. That’s the secret ingredient. And it has to start at the local level. It starts at the local level because you are closer to the people. (Applause.) And we want to create that infrastructure and give you the tools to help you do what you do best, and that’s help people prosper.

So thanks again, Mr. President.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you, Ja’Ron. Thank you very much. (Applause.) Thank you, Ja’Ron.

MR. FRAZIER: Mr. President, I’d like to say thank you for putting this together, putting this together in our state of Texas, and right here in Dallas.

A lot has happened in the last week. I’m one of your officers here in Dallas. I’m also one of your commissioners on your law enforcement administration with the Attorney General Barr. I can’t thank you — (applause).

I also have to say thank you to our great governor and our leadership that’s sitting right there. Without them, we don’t make this state — we don’t make this state great. (Applause.)

We’ve had some challenges because of what’s happened with COVID. But I want to give you an update of what we’ve done on the commission so far, where we’ve had nine full hearings throughout this entire time. That’s 35 panels, 125 witnesses, 190 written statements that are from individuals and interest groups. Our civil rights and community engagement organizations that we’ve asked to attend have no-showed. And those are the ones who can make the biggest difference when you’re putting together any type of reform, because they need to be the voice to come tell us what we need.

Law enforcement today is not what it was yesterday. In my 25 years, we’ve watched it propel to where our training is what we need the most. And with this bill, you’re going to see — or with this commission, you’re going to see so many reforms come out of it. It could not have come at a better time.

We can’t take back what happened in Minnesota. Not one officer that saw that — or federal officer that saw that — said that was the right thing that happened. That was — that was — it was — it was malice, and none of us — we condemn it. If I could have trade places with Mr. Floyd, I would, because I would die for everyone in this room, because that’s our job. And — (applause) — if I could trade places with any one of those officers who were there, I would have done that too, because I wouldn’t have let that happen.

And I have to say this to the citizens that we serve and the citizens that are listening: We see you, we hear you, we are with you, and we’re going to make this better. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much. Thank you very much.

MR. PONDER: Mr. President, I just want to thank you for your leadership, echoed in the sentiments of some of my colleagues up here today. Thank you for your stance on criminal justice reform. Thank you for not forgetting about the forgotten people. Thank you for your commitment and your support to the men and women of law enforcement in this country. And it is so, so very important.

My name is Jon Ponder. I’m the CEO of a ministry called Hope for Prisoners. And what Hope for Prisoners does is we work with men, women, and young adults that are exiting different arenas of our judicial system to provide the supportive services to help them to be able to successfully reintegrate back into their home, back into the workplace, and ultimately back into the community.

And, Mr. President, thank you for coming out and attending the graduation ceremony for those 31 men and women who were released from prison. I cannot tell you the wind that was beneath their wings because you came and spoke life into them. And they’re on a whole new (inaudible) of life right now because of that. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Great job. Great job. That’s good. Great job.

MR. PONDER: One of the huge components — this is why I’m so supportive of your stance on law enforcement, because one of the key components to this reentry mechanism that we built up is our partnership with the police.

Our local sheriff at Las Vegas, Nevada, has given us close to 100 volunteer police officers that are mentoring and training men and women coming home from the prison system. And, sir, never before in the history of reentry, nowhere on this planet, to this magnitude, have the men and women from law enforcement come alongside formerly incarcerated folks and helped them to successfully reintegrate back into the community.

That is just further evidence that we serve a gigantic God that wants to bridge the gaps. (Applause.) And in that, that is why that is so important — because what God wants to do, the Bible calls it the “repairer of the breach.”

See, in communities across our country, there is such a disconnect between law enforcement and people from this segmented population. But when we’re able to come up with very creative ways to bring folks together — because, if you think about it, all across the country, in that disconnect, people do not trust police. Do you know why? Because they’re not in relationship with them. And in what relationship could you ever have trust, unless there’s life rubbing up against life in the spirit of complete transparency, that we have more in common than we have differences. And out of that transparency, build the relationship. And out of that relationship, it gets established trust.

It is something that Second Chance employers have absolutely fallen in love with. When you can tell — you know, tell the employer that the person that’s coming, that just came home from prison, that the mentor is a captain of the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department — that begins to just open doors. So I thank you for that.

Looking so very forward to, you know, the direction that we’re going. And on behalf of the men and women who are incarcerated, right now, in our prison system across the country, thank you for creating that atmosphere for them on the inside. But I know that you have dug the trenches to create an atmosphere for them once they get released. So I thank you for that.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you, Jon. Very nice. Thank you very much. (Applause.) Very nice. Great job you’re doing, Jon. Great job.

Please.

DR. ARMSTRONG: Thank you, Mr. President, for putting this together today. I’ve learned so much from these men and women on this stage. I really appreciate that. Thank you for — you know, my name is Dr. Robin Armstrong, and I’ve — I’m a physician, and I’ve had an opportunity to treat many, many patients with the plague from China. And it’s been — (laughter) — and — with the COVID-19. And so we’ve had a lot of opportunity.

Thank you so much for breaking down some of the regulatory barriers in the FDA to allow us to use medications like hydroxychloroquine — (applause) — and to use medications like remdesivir and plasma infusions and all of those medications that are coming online now. Thank you so much for that.

You know, it’s been — I had the opportunity to — we had a nursing home in South Texas that had an outbreak of COVID-19. And we saw a lot of nursing facilities around the country that were having horrible outcomes and many deaths. And what we decided to do was commit to this facility and use a medication that you are familiar with, hydroxychloroquine. And we saw tremendous outcomes. (Applause.)

And it was — with the help of — with the help of some of our elected officials, our lieutenant governor, and a state senator, we were able to get access to those medications. But one of the more frustrating things I’ve seen has been the resistance of some of the regulatory agencies to be more open to using that.

I believe that — I certainly know that COVID-19 has significantly adversely affected the African American community. And I really believe that had there been more of an openness by the regulatory agencies, certainly by our medical boards all around the country to use medications like hydroxychloroquine, I believe more lives could have been saved.

THE PRESIDENT: Right.

DR. ARMSTRONG: And so I really — I want to thank you for bringing that issue to the forefront because I believe that it — it did give us more access to medications.

And so — and so, it was helpful for us. I believe it saved lives. I believe we could have saved more lives. But I just want to thank you for the work that’s been done.

You know, regulations — and you’ve really broke down a lot of barriers and regulations. And in the business community, certainly I would appreciate your — what you’ve done on attempting to repeal Obamacare and all the efforts you’ve made towards that. That’s certainly going to improve access to care.

And so, I just want to thank you for all you’ve done, but we need to do a lot of work going forward to make sure that we minister to those who are most vulnerable. And so we really appreciate that.

Thank you for all of the work that Secretary Carson has done and Secretary Azar has done and our Surgeon General here has done. Thank you for allowing them to have the freedom to be able to innovate and do things and look at the data and make decisions. And so we really appreciate that. And thank you so much.

And physicians are very supportive of you. We’re really supportive of everything you’ve done to help bring this very inexpensive treatment to the forefront. And so thank you very much. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much, Doctor. Appreciate it. Thank you.

Please.

CHIEF DOOLEY: Mr. President, thank you for this opportunity. I’m humbled to be here. I’m Chief Dooley, Glenn Heights Department. My experience is based on serving in a large department and a small department. And I can tell you that there is some phenomenal police work being done out here across the board — across the board.

But there’s also some inconsistencies in our procedures, our policies, our hiring practices, our termination practices, our disciplinary practices. And I strongly support the need for standardization based on best practices for all police departments in our country. (Applause.)

I thank the President for his foresight, for making these things come to happen. I know they’re coming, and we need it. We are a country of very good departments, but we need to be a country of great departments. And this message today is about the transition to greatness. We have an opportunity in this country to transform the future of law enforcement.

But we need to make sure that we have a relentless pursuit of dedication to public service at all times and at all levels, specifically national consistence policy on use of force — every chief would be in support of that; mandatory participation on a national use for database — use of force database — yes, it needs to happen; development of natural — national statements for discipline and termination of police officers — that needs to happen; development of a public — a police officer decertification database — yes, we need to be able to get those bad apples out of our industry so what happened will never happen again. (Applause.)

We need to enhance the police leadership and culture, and it starts at the top. We have some great leaders in this country, but we can always be better. We can always continuously improve. We need to implement improved recruitment, hiring, and promotion practices that are dedicated to having officers that are relentless- — relentlessly pursuing the service of not the community, but our community. It’s about — no, not dividing us, but uniting us and understand that we come from the community.

We need to enhance the ability for police agencies to implement effective discipline. We need to make sure that we have policies that establish a framework for a community policemen engagement that fully embraces that police officers serve, protect, and connect everyone in our community so that we all can become better.

We need training. This is not the time to defund police departments. (Applause.) When an organization or a business is struggling to be better, now is not the time to take away those resources. You provide them, and you hold them accountable, and you set expectations, and you — and you manage them so they can be better. That’s what you do. We need more training. We need more specific training that’s dedicated to service of those that — everyone we enact with on a daily basis: those that are homeless, those that suffer from mental illness, those that suf- — that need food. Okay, we need the training to be able to connect those people we interact with with those that can provide those services. That’s what we need in this country.

I want to end with just these few thoughts. I have a very simple saying to my officers — that we serve, protect, and connect, and together is better. And as I look around this room, I know that together we will become better, and we will take this country to great levels under the leadership of Donald Trump. (Applause.)

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you, Chief. Thank you. Thank you, very much. (Applause.) Thank you very much. That was beautiful.

So it’s time to say goodbye, but we’ll be back. We’ll be back. And I just want to thank — Bishop, you’ve been my friend for a long time, and I appreciate everything you’ve done and everything you’ve said.

BISHOP JACKSON: Thank you.

THE PRESIDENT: A great unifying source of strength and everything else, and I appreciate it very much.

BISHOP JACKSON: Thank you. Can I add one last thing before you leave?

THE PRESIDENT: Please. Please.

BISHOP JACKSON: I’m tired of people blaming the current administration and others in our generation. These problems began many years ago. (Applause.) And what has been exciting to me is it was the church that began the abolitionist movement.

THE PRESIDENT: Yeah.

BISHOP JACKSON: It was the church and whites and blacks working together that started the NAACP. It didn’t have a black leader at the beginning of time. It was the church that led through in the Civil Rights movement. So I want to offer you my support in these listening sessions, in that the church needs to come together. I believe we can unify better than any group.

And what we’re looking for you to do is to give structural guidance, which you’re working on, and you’ve — you’ve already brought forth some amazing things. But I want to affirm that Democrats can’t kneel down and wear Kente cloth and stop black pain. Republicans can’t take some one-time act and stop black — black pain. But I believe we’ve got a man here who’s courageous enough to begin something that’s tough, and that we’re going to, this time, heal.

And so, I weep over this. I pray for you, as you know.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you. I know.

BISHOP JACKSON: And we believe that we’re going to get it right.

I got to say one last thing. Being a — I lost my late wife a couple years ago. I found out, in dealing with her, that sometimes you just got to listen, feel her pain. If you try to fix it too early, you’re going to make a mistake. Your listening sessions are wise because it’s going to give that cathartic process a chance.

So I don’t want to take up too much time, sir, but I wanted to say that. The people here, I challenge you Christians — black, white, Asian: Let’s come together, and let’s provide a safety net, and then we’ll work with business, and then we’ll work along with the administration. But don’t push them out here up front, and say, “Fix it now. Fix it now. Fix it now. Fix it now,” because it’s never worked that way. Thank you, sir.

THE PRESIDENT: Thank you very much, Harry. Appreciate it. Thank you very much. Thank you very much, Pastor. Fantastic job you do. Thank you, everybody. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you.

END

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