#Spartans already make me emotional but FUCK man

[oasisofgalaxies]

Im so very normal about John halo

[akai-akai]

this is all over the place I'm sorry, but bear with me.

"suave, intimidating lieutenant simon" "quiet war-hardened mysterious simon"— NO

Simon Riley is a DORK.

Like imagine this big ass war-weathered 6'4 lieutenant who weighs over 200 pounds and has the build of a Spartan and a downright terrifying reputation. He's all aloof and intimidating and unapproachable and then at the most random of times, he rattles off the stupidest pun ever and just... Pretends nothing happened. Continues his day while some poor recruit is left wondering what the fuck that interaction meant.

Give me Simon Riley who mulls over which corny line to say in that subtle thinks-he's-the-funniest-man-alive tone. Does that dumb little ₕᵤₕ ₕᵤₕ ₕᵤₕ when he's especially proud of the fuckery that just came from his mouth. Then gives a look that says "they'll never believe you" and walks off.

And when he has his mask off when it's just him and the boys, he gets this little quirk in his lips as he comes up with a new one and gets ready to deliver it. And if he receives an equally hilarious unbearable one back, his lips will stretch into a rare, crooked downturned smile, a tiny flash of his teeth— barely noticeable— showing through a small part in his lips, where scarring has given them an irregular shape and they don't quite seal together.

Or sometimes (usually) he'll receive an exasperated, agonized groan from Johnny, and his nose will scrunch slightly, eyes crinkling and the corners of his lips twitch, and he's so satisfied with himself that Johnny can't even be mad.

Other times, it'll be with a completely straight face, voice devoid of all emotion as he spells out yet another twisted pun and Johnny pinches the bridge of his nose and wonders what the hell is going through Simon's mind when he says shit like this. ("this one's great, I should say it. I'm gonna say it. I'm saying it.")

Johnny is his usual victim, and occasionally Kyle, so they're somewhat used to it, but the first time he drops one of these on the captain???

John thinks he's lost his fucking marbles and later checks Simon's file to make sure he didn't have any flags in any recent military-mandated therapy appointments or psyche-evals.

Johnny and Simon will be quietly coexisting together, like sitting in Simon's barracks while Simon does his tedious post-mission paperwork and Johnny attempts to nap on Simon's bed. Except he can't fucking nap because as soon as he begins to drift off, Simon's clearing his throat and Johnny just fucking knows it's coming.

"Don't," he'll try to say, but Simon's already opened his mouth to speak, it's happening.

"What do you call kids in the military?" No response. "......Infantry."

Johnny promptly stuffs Simon's pillow over his head, huffs, and considers chucking the pillow at the other man's thick skull.

NSFW:

When there's finally a moment of privacy and Johnny is balls deep and patiently waiting for Simon to give the go-ahead to move, but then Simon pauses and catches Johnny's eyes and Johnny will give him a "please no" expression, but then Simon's lips twitch and his mouth opens and— Oh, oops! Sorry Simon, Johnny didn't mean to move his hips like that and ruin your definitely-hilarious joke and replace it with such a scandalous sound.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

he's so funny I love him. this is probably out of character to some people, but it just scratches my brain.

[bloodgulchblog]

Alright fuck it, s2e1 liveblog.

I'm watching this with people later so the goal is just to get through it enough to sate my impatience, so I'm back to ye olde standby of watching it at high speed with subtitles on. (...Only I guess I'm gonna be slowed down by making comments, huh?)

Spoilers and uncharitable opinions and unfunny jokes will follow.

Not going to talk about stuff in the episode opener until it comes back bc there's not enough to say anything about.

5 minutes in and we're already doing whatever this is huh?

6:30 - Alright okay, fuck, Vannak took his spine pellet out and gets to have one (1) personality trait and it's animal facts and I kind of don't hate that. TV Chief is very unlikable but characters like Kai and Vannak playing the angle of having very youthful quirks bc having emotions is new is cute.

~10:00 - I have nothing to say yet about spooky shapes in the fog but I think this shot of Chief back to back with a marine is fun. Also I wonder if Corporal Perez (this character) will still matter 5 minutes from now.

Also looks like the foggy sword fight from the trailer is here, too difficult to get any kind of cap that doesn't suck out loud. I'm thinking about how I heard someone making a big deal about how Season 2 feels "less like a video game" (whatever that means), meanwhile "fog full of stealth sword guys trying to kill you" feels very very video game level.

~13:00 - Man, and I really thought that sword fighting stuff in the trailer was a solid indicator they were dragging Thel 'Vadamee into this mess. Hey guys look, Arbiter's in this season. 4,000 of him!

Additionally, if a bunch of people decide this is a ship the fandom owes me twenty dollars.

~15:00 - Congrats to Perez for surviving five minutes. Also, we're still doing whatever this is:

16 minutes in we finally get the show's opener. (It has the Halo in it now, I don't think it was there before but let's be perfectly honest it's not like I cared a lot.)

~17:30 or something, reminded once again that a lot of people are attracted to this actor

Also guess what, Keyes is an Admiral now I guess????

Do we think he still gets to get eaten by the Flood eventually? Do we think the Flood will even be in here? Place ur bets at the counter.

Anyway, they're basically diving into a big timeskip here where a bunch of planets have been glassed since last season (including Madrigal). This whole AU is weird to the bone in terms of how its timeline is shaking out.

Anyway anyway, aww here we go

"I'm not here to replace Dr Halsey, I'm here because I believe in you!"

Ohhhhh he knows all the Spartans' names already, ohhhhh they want the audience to like this mf so bad, they want it to be such a tweest that he sucks shit-

Moving right along, at 22:30 we have the Rubble having a crowd decide whether various refugees should be spaced or taken into indentured servitude, because of course we do.

tl;dw the nebbish redhead knows where Catherine Halsey is and there's a big bounty out for her and he's trying to use it as a bargaining chip to not die and everyone thinks that's very funny, also Soren is here. I guarantee he decides to go after her, but first we have to have a scene cut back to whatever TV Chief is doing.

Man I'm really noticing they haven't shown the weird ridged rubber tech suit yet this episode, I wonder if they decided to replace it.

Anyway here's Perez, I still think they want people to start shipping:

Then Jimmy Rings has a meeting with tv show's new guy they want you to like so bad.

Also he says "The O-N-I" like a complete tool. (This is how you know he sucks.)

And while I'm talking trash about him: Ackerson stop flirting, didn't they tell you nobody's allowed to be gay in Halo? Get your shit together.

Thus ends the dream of the funniest possible universe where we just had Cortana: The Show forever. Someone get the penny whistle. My heart will not go on. 😢

Fuck, I was doing timestamps, right? I'm like half an hour in.

THEY STILL WANT YOU TO THINK ACKERSON CARES, BY THE WAY, IN CASE YOU DID NOT NOTICE

They're laying this on so thick so fast there's no way he's not a shitweasel in this AU, but also that would be the funniest possible thing to me.

(If anyone ships this, the fandom owes me forty dollars and therapy.)

ANYWAY... Action figure time. (Remember to boycott Jazwares!)

Soren's kid is playing with a MASTER CHIEF ACTION FIGURE and being weird, meanwhile Soren's wife is calling him out on shit and reminding him that refugees being turned away is, you know, bad.

Congrats to Soren's wife for continuing to be the most unexpectedly sympathetic supporting character I guess, but they made Soren so unlikable off the 1st season it's hard for me to feel investment of any kind here.

35 minutes in: the Spartans are watching a space TV broadcast. They have Ca-ADMIRAL. Admiral. Admiral Keyes presenting the Colonial Cross to Corporal Perez for blah blah blah you saw the start of the episode. The shape of the ceremony and the hovering tv drone thing are obvious H2 references.

(Does this mean Perez is our Sergeant Johnson now? Vote with your phones.)

Get your face out of here, Ackerson, I know what you are.

Oh god there's another team of Spartans (Cobalt) and having adult Spartan-IIs call each other names like children is fucking weird.

Aaaaand tumblr is capping the number of images I can post here and I'm still only about half way done. Fuck. I am not doing this this way for Episode 2 I can promise you that.

(Also hey look the tech suit is back, I guess Silver Team doesn't use it so much anymore to show you they're more human now or whatever?)

[welcometogrouchland]

sorry if I'm bothering you but I FINALLY FIND SOMEONE ELSE WHO PREFERS FTF BUT PURELY BECAUSE OF OUR LOVE FOR WILLOW (we're the only ones right about her) like yeah, it's DEFINITELY not a perfect episode but IT'S ABOUT THE CHARACTERS. and I LOVE TTT TOO BECAUSE OF LUZ but tbh I didn't like being in the fandom when TTT came out because THERE WAS SO MUCH STUFF ABOUT HUNTER, TO THE POINT WHERE PEOPLE THOUGHT HE SHOULD BE THE MC AND NOT LUZ??? I love my boy but I felt overwhelmed at all of this so him not getting too much in FTF was fine for me :)

Firstly, I'd like to say YES!! FOR THE FUTURE SOLOS!!! LITERALLY SOME OF THE BEST CHARACTER WORK, ART DIRECTION, SOUNDTRACK, BOARDING, HUMOUR AND HORROR IN THE WHOLE SHOW!!!

Secondly I'd like to say that this is SUCH a can of worms that I've held back on talking about for A While™. Tbh it kinda feels like u read my mind I was literally thinking about this this morning.

(BIG ASS RAMBLE UNDER THE CUT. I AM NOT JOKING THIS POST IS SO LONG IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY)

Both episodes are really fucking good, both on their own merit and when you take into account the circumstances under which they were made. I do not want to labour this point. I hate pitting two bad bitches against each other.

I AM however interested in investigating why, when two episodes are of similar quality, but with different priorities and focuses and (for lack of a better word) Vibe™ does the fandom demonstrably prefer one over the other?

Thanks to Them is BIG on plot. It's big on "establish what the kids have been doing, introduce Lore and Mystery, do the possession, fight the bad guy, get back to the demon realm, bada bing bada boom!!". I don't think it's nearly as relentlessly paced as some people think, and I think there are definitely emotional moments to be gleaned out of characters who AREN'T Luz, Hunter or Camilla- but overall it's similar to the most plot focused episodes of season 2. Your knock knock knocking on hootys doors and your hollow minds.

But for the future is a lot more concerned with character. Everyone gets some small moment to shine, though you're correct in saying that the focus is mostly on Luz, Willow and then probably the collector. But Camilla, Gus, Amity, Hunter, King, Eda and Lilith all get more emotional depth in a few lines than like. Willow did in half of thanks to them. even Belos gets more screentime this ep than he did in thanks to them, screentime that's much more illuminating (do love the moments he had in thanks to them but they weren't huge character moments really, just him villain-ing it up).

Less plot stuff happens, if you count the main goal as "get into the titans skull" then that's only introduced about a quarter of the way through the episode, whereas "get back to the human realm" is established as the goal of thanks to them in like. Negative screentime lmao. You basically know it's the goal coming in because you've watched king's tide already. For the future isn't like this!

And I GET IT MAN! checking in on the YouTube progress bar at the 3/4 of the way through elicited pure fear in me! But I feel like the fandoms fear of plots going unresolved and questions going unanswered has created this. Like. Attitude that the episodes need to be completely spartan or they're wasting time.

Like, with bringing back Boscha and Kikimora. Some people consider that a waste of time because they weren't Big Bads in seasons prior, meaning they should be low priority and don't belong here. And ppl are entitled to feel that way!

But I don't think you can call them wasted! Or irrelevant! I think the writers put a lot of work into making their storyline fit with the themes of the show! I have an essay I may never finish in drafts about this but- one of the most popular aspects of seasons 1 and 2 was the whole corrupt government storyline, which reached it's climax in king's tide but still had no resolution, same way hexside had no resolution from what happened after labyrinth runners. The writers combined these storylines by showing how hexside wasn't going to become a mini dictatorship like the isles old system (hence the title of the episode, changing things for the better "for the future"). That's efficient storytelling! Combining two plots into one in order to resolve both at the same time!

But people don't take this as an example of efficiency because it's not Lore or Plot based. And I think that's a real shame.

Both episodes have pacing and balance issues but I don't think one is especially egregious compared to the other? Nor do they have more pacing and balance issues than say, Clouds on the Horizon, which I'd say is one of MY least favouritely paced episodes of the show. Maybe thanks to them just had more novelty factor because of the setting (not to mention it probably benefitted from having one less subplot to juggle, but eh)

And about the fandom response after each episode....yeah. yeah.

I love Hunter. He's my baby. My scrimblo bimblo. He is like my twin brother. Literally. For reasons I cannot begin to explain here, hunter the owl house is like my twin brother.

And in all fairness to the fandom, plenty of people are normal about him. I know this because I've curated my experience to entirely be the people who are normal about him.

But the people who are not normal about him...my god.

Tbh I think this issue of focus actually lands on why I prefer for the future to thanks to them (THOUGH AGAIN. THEY BOTH SLAY)

The ending of thanks to them was so abrupt and emotionally charged that it felt like a betrayal, almost. The show went so hard and so fast that afterwards there was no breathing room and I didn't fully trust the show to be able to pull back afterwards. I thought either Hunter is going to eat up more and more screentime next episode by having to deal with the implications of every that happened five minutes from the episodes end, or they are literally never going to touch on him again. The ending of thanks to them was SO MUCH in so little time that I literally could not fathom a middle road.

Whereas the ending of for the future was a lot more. Aha, eureka! Moment to me. Like "OHH so that's what we're dealing with next episode!!! Nice". There was excitement and yeah, fear that things wouldn't land, but overall there was more trust in me. And of course, they did find a lovely medium between it being the Hunter show and addressing his trauma adequately. His arc was very emotional and satisfying this ep, without the borderline hard-to-enjoy turmoil that the ending of thanks to them put me through lol.

But I think, to some people, the sheer angst of thanks to thems ending was more emotionally rewarding than the well paced stability and slight ominousness of for the future. They felt that episodes end was too "mid". Too soft. The end of the show needs to go all out all the time, so this episode that focused more on emotional arcs and early season callbacks and payoffs is weak.

And to be honest, maybe my analysis here isn't as in-depth or as in-touch with fandom complaints as it could be! I've generally avoided the people harshly criticizing for the future because I like it when fandom is fun. I don't like watching one of my favorite episodes to date get dunked on. But that in and of itself (combined with the leak situation) has led to an inability to really Go All Out with fandom engagement rn. It's a struggle!

I've seen people describe for the future as en episode where Everything happened, and yet nothing happened. I get why! I personally prefer it to thanks to them because I feel like too much happened during that episodes climax to the point where it didn't even feel like the episode had true resolution.

But also, I get that for a lot of people, it's not even about construction. It's just about expectation and preference. People weren't expecting hexside, and when they got it, they got upset. People weren't expecting Willow, and when they got it, they didn't like it. And I get that. Really I do.

But this show is so fuckin wild. It does so much and throws so many curve balls at you. Never the big twists either, always the shit u don't expect. And it's great. I've honestly grown really fond of the way this show pokes me in the ass with something I didn't really expect or consider.

Not everybody is though and like. That's fine. But I do wish sometimes people would just. Kinda. Let it go when something goes in a direction they didn't expect. Because I didn't expect the direction FTF went in at all and I loved it once I stopped to think about it. But that's just me.

I think this is only like. 25% a direct response to things you said in the ask, so to conclude by answering/engaging with your ask point by point:

Willow stans and For the Future stans unite. This is our nation. Also shout-out to the fellow willow understanders I am mutuals with/follow you guys were really keeping us going in the pre for the future times

It's not a perfect episode but circumstances considering, it never could've been, and I'm okay with most of the ways it falls short. I'm also fully willing to hold out and see whether or not watching and dreaming rectifies any of my complaints, considering several of the issues I took with thanks to them were solved this ep, lol

Luz and Camilla literally stole the show in thanks to them and while I understand that the ending of that ep was very hunter centric, hence the hunter centric fandom atmosphere afterwards, I do prefer the environment in fandom rn that's appreciating this mother daughter duo rn

Hunter is not a main character imo. Not because he couldn't be but because his story is rendered infinitely more interesting when he is a supporting character. It's one thing to tell us that Hunter lives for other people and is made to forever be a second- best underling. It's another thing to show us this with his narrative role as the ultimate foil. He Is Better Off This Way. Also this point is dumb but I fully believe Hunter would be miserable as a main character. He does not want this

Also Luz is genuinely one of my favorite main characters in television. Maybe ever. If I start talking about her we'll be here all day. Just look at literally anything sepublic has written about her it's all on point

For the future had the perfect amount of Hunter content tbh. No episode should have more or less. I'm banging my gavel like a judge decreeing this to be so

[feilien]

 “You are, if you think this rooftop is deserted. You don’t think you just managed to sneak up on me, did you? The only reason you took me by surprise is because I expect to be watched; I just didn’t expect it to be you.” No, Zane certainly wasn’t a sixteen-year-old boy anymore, that much was obvious. But he sure as hell was acting like one, taking unnecessary risks and apparently not thinking things through. Hell, sixteen-year-old Zane had been smarter than this. It was irritating, infuriating even. Zane might be the enemy, but that didn’t mean Long Zhi wanted him harmed, let alone dead.

 I came here for you. He hated the way those words made him feel. How they instantly made him weak all over again, willing to throw caution into the wind and give in to whatever it was they used to have. He wanted it again. More than words could ever describe. But he, too, was no longer a sixteen year old boy. Instead, he was a grown man who still paid for the mistakes he’d made back then. Who still paid for the mistakes he made now. Xiao Dan’s patience would run out eventually, if Long Zhi didn’t wise up and act the way he was supposed to act. He couldn’t keep falling into old habits, even if those old habits had been the best thing that had ever happened to him, and probably ever would. He had top stop falling into this trap. He wasn’t supposed to be prey, he was supposed to be the fucking predator.

 When he felt Zane’s hand around his arm, Long Zhi froze for a second. It felt as though he was struck by lightning, and for a moment he was willing to be struck again. But then he came back to his senses and, after turning back around to face Zane, spartan kicked him with more force than necessary to put distance between them. He needed it to keep a clear head, to stop making stupid decisions that would only make things worse than they already were.

 “What do you fucking think, Zi Xin? Do you think you could ‘keep tabs on me’ if I had told them anything at all? Do you think you could prowl around the way you are if they even had an inkling you’re back? I know you seem to think you’re this big, invincible badass now for some godforsaken reason, but you’re not. You’re one man against a fucking army. We have numbers. And a lot of them are skilled fighters, skilled killers. If they as much as even picked up your scent, you’d be surrounded before you knew what happened.”

 Taking a step towards the other, Long Zhi balled his hands into fists to hide the slight trembling of his hands. Trembling from anger, from pain, from all of the emotions Zane’s reappearance had violently brought back to the surface after Long Zhi had so carefully buried them all as deep down as he could, aware he could never truly get rid of them no matter what.

 “You want to know what I told him? What I told Xiao Dan? Nothing. Because, despite everything, I was stupid enough to want to protect you. I looked him in the eyes and told him I let my target get away. I told him I was incompetent, a failure, and I paid the price for it. I paid the price for nothing at all, because you insist on acting like a fucking fool. You will get yourself killed, Zane. And me right along with you.”

       Matt's scolding was frustrating to listen to and Zane offered nothing but a roll of his eyes. Matt didn't know that Zane had been forced to viciously kill four of the Black Dragon Clan's men alone when he was sixteen, nor did he know of all the people he'd killed since. He wasn't about to tell him, either — Zane had nothing to prove.

       Aside from that, of course he wasn't stupid enough to let himself get caught in enemy territory. Despite how many people he may or may not believe he could hold his ground against, he wouldn't risk it. His death meant he couldn't give his father the vengeance he deserved and that simply wasn't an option.

       He watched Matt closely as he disengaged, seeking a towel and his forgotten shirt. Zane took note of the way he moved, the areas he seemed to favor, every inkling of weakness. He was trying to figure out where the worst of the damage was. Part of it was a habit, a means of survival that he'd learned to hone on the streets. It was in case Zane was forced to use Matt's injuries against him, but ... he was also trying to put together the string of events in his minds eye.

       He felt both relief and disappointment when all that skin was again shrouded from view. However, when their eyes met and Matt saw a flash of what Zane was truly capable of, he'd taken a step back. Good, he thought, ignoring the painful sting in his heart. He should be wary of me. If Matt ended up giving him no other choice but to treat him like an enemy, his fear and weakness would be useful.

       The mere idea of that made Zane sick to his stomach.

        ❝Despite what you think, I'm not an idiot, Matt. That's why I'm standing here, on a deserted rooftop, talking to you. I'm not a fucking sixteen year old kid asking to be taught basic self defense anymore.❞ Zane hadn't intended to argue against Matt's scolding words, or his apparent belief in Zane's percieved incompetence, but ... it was difficult to hold back when Matt kept making the dig.

       No one did anything to me that I didn't deserve. Like hell, Zane wanted to argue. Matt deserved a hell of a lot better than whatever controlling, torturous nightmare he was currently living. A heavy sigh escaped him and he shook his head, eyes briefly closing. ❝I came here for you,❞ he rasped, instantly regretting the way it sounded. I was worried about you. I wanted to make sure you were okay. I know you're not okay and I hate feeling helpless all over again. ❝You found our safehouse, I have to keep tabs on you now. I noticed something was wrong ...❞

       Zane gritted his teeth and closed the distance between them, one hand shooting out to curl around Matt's arm before he could go back to what he'd been doing. Again, he sought Matt's gaze and again he was far too close, closer than strictly necessary, but ... he wanted to be closer still. ❝Listen. I need to know what you told them.❞ Given they hadn't hunted him down yet told Zane that Matt hadn't said much, if anything at all, but ... he had to know for sure. Again it sparked a painful blaze of hope in his chest.

[quinntamsin]

"Quinn." "Yes, Aurora," she asked the AI. An image of a cyan woman appeared in her HUD, dressed in a glowing pulsating knee length dress. "There are signs of Banished in the area, we are currently being tracked." The Spartan sighed at the words, and reached for her sniper rifle. "I hate Brutes."

Sorry, this took so long, depression is a real bitch. But’s discuss the POVs and my reactions to them from Halo Season 1 - Episode 5 “Reckoning”

---

Cold Open: Years ago, on Eridanus the Monster Haley visits the Reach for Life project. And we can see her zoning in on John as special. We can already see the almost stepford-like glance she gives her husband. Yup, he knows she's gonna be stealing kids! Dr. Keyes: We switch to Keyes, her father has taken command over the Eridanus defense. Kai and Keyes appear on friendlier base as she exits. Again getting ignored by momma, because neglect is still abuse. Keyes is gushing over the new discovery, and finds out she's off the project. But, she's obviously, figures out her dad has a big stake with Halsey. You can see her thinking as well as dealing with her emotions. Haley: Sing with me, HALEY IS A MONSTER BITCH! This entire thing, just keeps getting better and better. Looks like Adun, her assistant, is a out to get everyone killed because they didn't think to do further research on the fucking material. John-117 Master Chief is back to his stoic HELMET wearing self. (Seriously, people we don't need to see his face).  John having seeing trauma and worse from his past, is quiet. Cortana seems to be unable to reach him, and he's actively disassembling in front of Haley. Chief reunites with Kai, and she gives her the reality of her new feelings. He grounds her, and she questions it, and Cortana pushes Chief since he's being a moody helmetless asshole. John confronts Captain Keyes about Haley, and you can see it in his eyes. He's haunted, maybe John will pick up on it. God, I hope he does. John should kick Adun right now, but he's too busy staring at the larger part of the keystone. Our boy knows he's been fucked with, and he goes to the machine to learn even further. He jumps at Halsey, which she fucking deserves, and is then shut down Data style by Cortana. Ha Kwan: Rebel Girl is off in the middle of the desert on Madrigal, only alive from our assassin because Soren is a total bad ass. I think she's starting to realize, hopefully, that she's not as combat capable. And, yup, she's left behind because now she owes Soren. Seriously girl, you need to learn proper combat training and how to actually deliver. Kwan, girl, you seriously are living in a fantasy world. Sigh, like, I get it that she's almost dead, and her family was killed before her. But, again, I said she's delusional. Kwan, just doesn't grasp the level of consequence, and how life can just smack you. Hopefully, she learns something, she needs to get it through her head, that you have to make retreats to make gains in the future. And she runs' off, never mind. Soren returns, and there's no Kwan, the man is outright irritated. HOpefully he can track Rebel Princess, and doesn't kill her. At least, she's wait, nope she is. Holy shit, she got the drop on a Spartan. Now if only she could use that fucking knowledge, and stop getting OTHER people killed.  This fith was fucking amazing, and honestly, WE can see why they gave the Spartan's their pellets. Kai-125: Silver Team is prepping for the upcoming defense and further exploration of the ruins. Kai asks questions and receives a pretty blunt military level rebuke from Vannak. I do like how our girl is questioning the military indoctrination she's been put under. Kai is a little unhinged, she's questioning shit, and while I disagree with Chief punishing her, I am curious if this will provided another Kaiyes moment! Makee: The blessed one appears back on madrigal, and is leading her Elite cadre to search for what the UNSC already knows. The Elite seems to question her, but is far more respectful than one might think. Ah, time for more infiltration, and hopefully Chief doesn't fall for it. Conclusion:

WE finally got some action! I get, we were sepnding time setting it all up, but finally seing Jackals and Grunts in action! I have some more ideas for a Kaiyes, scene, and wow, if you haven’t read it, check out my Drabbles on my second favorite Halo OTP here!

[cherubcow]

“Invincible”, Season 1 (2021) Review

Somehow both very cool and very fucking stupid :D

About Created and written primarily by Robert Kirkman (principle writer for The Walking Dead comic and TV show), this Young Adult cartoon basically synthesizes a number of comic book characters (e.g., Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, Hellboy, Wonder Woman, Gambit) and tries to balance their heroism with cynical twists and dark realities. It's an exercise like Brightburn (2019) in that it mirrors existing comic writing all too closely in order to make violent twists. The cool stuff arrives pretty much immediately. You can tell right away that the physics have some level of realism, and it quickly gets serious because of this. The easy comparison would be to The Boys (also by Amazon, also about violent heroes, and also very well-produced). So, if you like The Boys (2019–), you'll probably like Invincible only a little less.

(( Some spoilers but nothing too specific ))

Wrong Focus But, the stupid stuff comes from the same error that the Kick-Ass movie (2010) made: it focuses on the wrong person(s). In Kick-Ass, the error was focusing on.. well.. "Kick-Ass", an irredeemable loser and waste of screen time. Invincible makes the same mistake, focusing on.. well.. "Invincible", a (so far) irredeemable loser and waste of screen time. So, despite its virtues, this show cannot escape that it made the decision to go for the Young Adult viewing demographic. It reminds me of Alita: Battle Angel (2019) in that way too: some very cool adult concepts ruined by the dramatic devices of unrepentant teenage stupidity and irrelevance. I didn't even like that stuff when I was a teenager, though Jordan Catalano gets a pass.

Main Cast and Characters The supporting characters were also very stupid. The most annoying was definitely Amber Bennett (voiced by the otherwise cool Zazie Beetz from Deadpool 2 (2018) and Joker (2019)), 

who is supposed to be attractive somehow to Mark Grayson ("Invincible", voiced by Steven Yeun, who played Glenn on The Walking Dead) 

despite the fact that she constantly judges him, fails to understand him, often fails to give him any kind of benefit of the doubt, and continues to scowl at him and be hurtful towards him even when she has information that should change her outlook towards him. And because she is part of the love triangle shared between herself, Invincible/Mark, and "Atom Eve"/Samantha (voiced by the awesome Gillian Jacobs from Community (2009–2014)), 

audiences simply have to bear with it that Amber's annoying character will be present and wasting time until Mark can realize that Amber is in fact toxic and that Eve actually understands him and can improve him in more positive directions. That love triangle should have been a 20-minute distraction, but I'm guessing that it will eat up a season or two more, especially if the writers become cowardly and fail to change things for fear of messing up a perceived "winning" formula. In my ideal story line, they would skip ahead 10 years, drop the teen drama, the love triangle, and the stupid jokes and have Invincible and Eve paired in defense of Earth, with the main tension being from their worry that the other would be horribly gored in front of them during lethal fights against cosmic enemies ;)

Aside, I am aware of Amber’s motivation for being a bad person, I just think her justification is not based in understanding, empathy, and a regard for the gravity of Invincible’s situation. In a strict political sense, Invincible should not commit a lie of omission by keeping her in the dark about his identity — even if for the “noble lie” reason of protecting her — but in a real sense, he is a fucking teenager who just developed his super powers. For her to pretend that he should reveal his entire identity to her — a potentially transformative and even dangerous decision — after a few months of teenage romance paints an absurd portrait of her mind. It does, however, align her with Omni-Man, because where Omni-Man forces Invincible to become an adult in the fighting sense (pushing with full force early on), Amber forces Invincible to become an emotional adult by getting him to understand that toxic people such as herself need to be given boundaries — and he needs to learn to clearly delineate and communicate his real desires. By knowing that he does not want Amber, people who regiment his free time, or people who do not suit him, for instance, he can realize why Eve was an obvious decision: Eve understands, can make time when they have time, and will let him find his decisions. Part of a coming-of-age story tends to be realizing what one actually wants, and Invincible’s hesitation in telling Amber his identity shows that he does not truly want her. This separates Invincible from, say, Spider-Man, who avoided telling Mary Jane his identity not because he did not want her but because he wanted at all costs to protect her.

The next most annoying character has to be Debbie Grayson (voiced by TV-cancer Sandra Oh and who luckily was not animated to look like the real Sandra Oh and who should have been voiced instead by Bobby Lee due to Lee's successful MadTV parody of Sandra Oh). 

Debbie basically fills the role of Skyler in Breaking Bad, except that Debbie's character tends to be slightly more understanding before her inevitable and toxic Skyler-resentment and undermining behavior. Despite having an 8-episode arc of change, Debbie's character flips too quickly and lacks the empathy and Omni-Man motive-justifying that would make her interesting (the comic's development may vary). For instance, if she refused to believe that Omni-Man meant his own words, that would make her empathetic and perhaps virtuous even if misled, but instead she dropped their "20 years" of understanding after viewing Omni-Man in action, which makes her appear shallow, easily manipulated, and unsympathetic. That was a definite "Young Adult" genre move because it shows immaturity by the writers to break apart a bond of 20 years so quickly. Mediocre teens might accept such a fissure because their lives have not yet seen or may not comprehend that level of time, but adults know that even long-standing and problematic relationships (which, beyond the lie, Omni-Man's and Debbie's was not shown to be) take a lot of time to break — even with lies exposed.

Omni-Man The biggest show strength for me was of course Omni-Man, who in a success of casting was voiced by J.K. Simmons in a kind of reprisal of Simmons' role as Fletcher from Whiplash (2014). 

The Fletcher/Omni-Man parallel shows through their being incredibly harsh but extremely disciplined and principled, forcing people to become beyond even their own ideal selves (this via Omni-Man's tough-love teaching of Invincible — comically, Omni-Man was actually psychologically easier on Invincible than Fletcher was on Whiplash's Andrew character). Despite the show's attempts to villainize Omni-Man, he, like Fletcher and also like Breaking Bad's Walter White, becomes progressively more awesome, eventually representing a Spartan will, an unconquerable drive, and a realistic and martial understanding of a hero's role.

To the show's credit, while it wrote Omni-Man to be outright genocidal and from a culture of eugenicists (again, Spartan), they could not help but admire him and his "violence" and "naked force" (for a Starship Troopers reference), giving him a path to redemption. That redemption comes in part because — despite the show's attempt to be often realistic and violent — its decision to be directed at young adults via dumb jokes, petty relationship drama, the characters’ reckless lack of anonymity and security in their neighborhood (loudly taking off and landing right at the doorstep), and light indy music also made the portrayed violence far less literal. With a less literal violence, the real statement becomes not that Omni-Man really did kill so many people (though he certainly did kill those people within the show's plot) but that he was symbolically capable of terrible violence but could be reformed for good. That's the shortcoming with putting violence under demographic limitations. If it's a PG-13 Godzilla knocking down cities, the deaths in the many fallen skyscrapers don't matter so much (the audience will even forgive Godzilla for mass death if it happens mostly in removed spectacle), whereas if it's Cormac McCarthy envisioning a very realistic fiction, every death rides the edge of true trauma.

By showing light between the real and the symbolic, it is much easier to identify and agree with Omni-Man. For instance, when Robot (voiced by Zachary Quinto of Heroes and the newer Star Trek movies) 

shows too much empathy for the revealed weakness of "Monster Girl" (voiced by Grey Griffin), the audience may have thought, "Pathetic," even before Omni-Man himself said it. And this because Omni-Man knows that true and powerful enemies (including himself) will not hesitate to use ultra-violence against these avenues of weakness. "Invincible" can make his Spider-Man quips while in lethal battles, but he does so while riding the edge of death — something that Omni-Man has to teach Invincible by riding him to the brink of his own.

Other Cast/Characters and Amazon's Hidden Budget It was impressive how many big-name actors were thrown into this — a true hemorrhage of producer funding. Amazon has so far hidden the budget numbers, perhaps because they don't want people to know that the show (like many of its shows) represents a kind of loss-leader to jump-start its entertainment brand.

Aside from those already mentioned, the show borrows a number of actors from The Walking Dead (WD), including.. • Chad L. Coleman ("Martian Man"; "Tyreese" on WD),

• Khary Payton ("Black Samson"; "Ezekiel" on WD),

• Ross Marquand (several characters; "Aaron" on WD)

• Lauren Cohan ("War Woman"; "Maggie" on WD)

• Michael Cudlitz ("Red Rush"; "Abraham" on WD)

• Lennie James ("Darkwing"; "Morgan" on WD)

• Sonequa Martin-Green ("Green Ghost"; "Sasha" on WD) 

There were also connections to Rick and Morty and Community, not just with Gillian Jacobs but also with... • Justin Roiland ("Doug Cheston"), who voices both Rick and Morty in Rick and Morty,

• Jason Mantzoukas ("Rex"),

• Walton Goggins ("Cecil"),

• Chris Diamantopoulos (several characters),

• Clancy Brown ("Damien Darkblood"),

• Kevin Michael Richardson ("Mauler Twins"), and

• Ryan Ridley (writing)

That's a lot of overlap. They even had Michael Dorn from Star Trek: TNG (1987–1994) (there he played Worf) and Reginald VelJohnson from Family Matters (1989–1998) and Die Hard (1988), and even Mark Hamill. Pretty much everyone in the voice cast was significant and known. Maybe Amazon got a discount for COVID since the actors could all do voice-work from home? ;)

Overall Bad that it was for the Young Adult target demo but good for the infrequent adult themes and ultra-violence. Very high production value and a good watch for those who like dark superhero stories. I have heard that the comic gets progressively darker, which fits for Robert Kirkman, so it will likely be worth keeping up with this show.

[bloodgulchblog]

Author's notes:

Some thoughts I had about what kinds of things I think factored into that situation for Chief (pasted from me chattering on discord), blah blah blah usual disclaimers about how I'm just some nerd not the final authority on this character but I am strongly opinionated:

This man has absolutely been screamed at so many times in so many worse ways, git gud.

Hyper aware of that if he fucking touches an ordinary person too fast the wrong way he can very very very easily kill them.

Hyper aware of what him doing violence on a non-enemy means and how it endangers him and other Spartans (especially given Del Rio was so kind as to remind John he might be considered a dangerous antique.)

Del Rio's position was already unpopular aboard the Infinity (you get the Marine chatter of them all being like lol what the fuck old man?) and the second Del Rio lost his composure it was over for him. The bridge crew's big silence no-confidence vote there at the end is devastating. John's not great at conversations and people but he's been living in command chains and leading teams his whole life. Instincts.

He was Very Busy and if a course of action wasn't going to help him continue with his immediate concerns (Didact and Cortana) it was going in the nice little containment box where John stores all his emotions anyway.

I also think he genuinely just…. only very rarely is angry enough to experience a violent impulse at all, and if he does he doesn't act on it. 1) Enormous well-trained thoroughly disciplined self control, and 2) John cares so very little about himself and his own feelings that it's actually hard to make him that kind of angry by getting in his face or insulting him cause it just… doesn't… work that good on him?

Chief, how did you get through interacting with Del Rio without punching or strangling him once?

I can't afford impulses like that.

And I didn't need to do anything physically to work past Del Rio anyway.

He'd already lost that crew.

[poisonheadcrabsalesman]

More therapy thoughts part 1/?

Behavior Theory Frameworks/Conditioning and What the fuck does Master Chief talk about in therapy?

Ramblings below - like a lot, like I spent too much time writing this and you should not read this

Behavioral Theory could work well as a framework with rehabilitating Spartan IIs if the case worker focused on Operant Conditioning Theory and Cognitive Social Learning Theory, which I talked about in this ask because I think I’m funny and this blog is an archive of me applying human behavior theories to video games.

Spartans have always been taught the mission comes first! Always! The 2s are indoctrinated from age 6-14 and then have that reinforced the rest of their lives. From the beginning they are taught to push themselves to the limits, earn their food by winning, form bonds with teammates but be ready to sacrifice them for the mission. The whole lives wasted vs spent conversation between John and Mendez after the augmentation surgery!

What the UNSC/ONI wants comes before their lives, the lives of other soldiers, civilians, AI etc. This constant conditioning of expectations and rewards has created the norms cemented in their minds. This becomes standard operating procedure.

Spartans are also an entirely separated social group, other people have made really great posts on how they are Othered and have their own way of communicating with body language. ODSTs hate Spartans, marines see them as cyborgs or saviors, and while they’re allies, Spartans are not seen or treated as human, by literally everyone. They are a means to an end, with the original goal being to maintain the UNSC’s position of power and crush the insurrectionists in the outer colonies, but uh oh Aliens!

Maybe the 2s aren’t as expendable as the 3s but the mindset and reinforcement of “mission first, people second” being repeated their entire lives is going to stick. So is the constant mistreatment and abuse from their fellow soldiers and handlers. 

Addressing the cognitive distortions that come from their upbringing while also balancing the fact that Spartans are so fundamentally different from the way they developed to survive would be so much work, especially considering how much information on them is given to their therapist.  The main distortion I would apply is minimization, making large problems small and not properly dealing with them, and specifically for John, personification, accepting blame for negative events without sufficient evidence. 

Like these are grown ass super soldiers who can kill you in less than a second and calculate the amount of gravity in a room on the fly but then also can flounder when trying to comfort civilians or make small talk because their experiences and values are so alien to adults who had more developmentally “normal” lives. 

Literally applying therapy to Spartans would be like, what was done to you was wrong, the ends do not justify the means, you were children and the adults in your life failed to protect you. You are a human person who is fallible and did the best you could with what you had. And the Spartan would say, “sounds fake but okay, can I pass my psych eval and go back to war now please?”

Jumping back to Behavior Theory

Different approaches to therapy under the Behavior Theory umbrella help modify negative behaviors with treatments like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Dialectical behavior therapy that teach individuals adaptive coping like emotional regulation, distress tolerance, cognitive distortions, and interpersonal communication. And that’s just one framework under the umbrella of human behavior theories.

Social work therapy is different from psych as it approaches individuals with heavily researched, evidence-based theories and frameworks in a holistic viewing of person-in-environment, instead of a strong focus on internal psychology. 

Social work looks at all the interacting systems, environment, history, and internal and external factors affecting an individual. One of the most useful frameworks is the Biopsychosocial-Spiritual Frameworks (BPSS) when helping a client. It helps with identifying all the intersecting factors, both risk and protective, that shapes a client’s lived experiences. The most important thing to remember is that the individual is an expert in their own life, they know their experiences best.

The hardest part is applying this to Spartans because they Are So Fucked, their lived experiences, their environments and systems and institutions interacting with them, and the amount of their personal information that is probably so classified.

BPSS is a tool to help social workers assess individuals and their situations by collecting info that is related to the presenting issues and current and past circumstances. Info like medical history, hospitalizations, substance abuse, mental illness, personal relationships, family history and background, culture and norms, education, legal history, spirituality and participation etc. is all under this framework. 

For Spartan 2s most of this info is lost or classified and helping someone who has repressed every negative emotion they've had for the sake of the mission would be so much to unpack but that’s also why you’re reading the mad ramblings over an over caffeinated nerd on the internet.

Life Course Theory which looks at developmental milestones and the individual’s experiences versus the socially expected markers, how do you apply that to children who were taken and have lived such different lives? 

While early adolescence is when “normal” development of thoughts of self and identity take place alongside the physical changes of puberty, Spartans were being turned into emotionless calculating weapons. Sorry John, no forming a sense of identity and peer bonds for you, go kill that Watts guy who betrayed us and joined the insurrectionists. 

And now that I’ve gone this insane and opened 2 whole textbooks up, let’s get to Master Chief thoughts. If you’ve read this far thank you, I swear I’m normal, 2020 has just been a weird year. 

Why the fuck did I think I could write a therapy fic on a guy with 20 minutes of actual dialogue across almost 2 decades of games?

I make fun of him and call him a himbo, but he’s smart, he knows he’s being used and there is resentment there that’s been building for years. 

There’s also decades of trauma and combat experience, physical, and emotional abuse, the lack of a support network,  lack of an identity, the biological factors and aftermath of the augmentations and injuries he’s received, a whole lot of grief and self-inflicted guilt. 

The loss of a third of his peer group with the augmentation surgery, Sam’s death, the loss of Reach (the only place he’s considered home), Keyes, the Pillar of Autumn crew, Miranda Keyes, Johnson, Cortana. He cares about the marines who fight with him!!!

He just stands there and takes it and rarely snaps, and even then it’s just small cracks on the surface with fissures running deep. The few details I will pull from Halo 5 are Blue Team’s reactions to John pushing himself so hard from the beginning of the game, and the literal crack in his armor from the fight with Locke. Like dude.  

John’s a leader and will get the mission done but he tugs on the leash. He’s earned enough of a reputation and uses it to get his way.

Halo 2’s “Permission to leave the station” with Mr. “I’m going to hand deliver a bomb to the fusion reactor of a covenant supercarrier and hope my friends catch me”. 

Halo 4 is when we see him say no to a superior officer and then 5 is him going AWOL. Palmer literally points out that no one is going to stop him.

Halo 5 kills me for many reasons but John bringing up Halsey and what she did to him and also pointing out that he knows Halo 5 Cortana is trying to manipulate him with psychological tactics hurts. 

He knows what’s been done to him!

I cannot remember which book it was but John isn’t used to working alone. He literally takes fire because he was expecting someone to have his back! 

He’s lost without Cortana! She was in his brain! Y’all! I played Halo Combat Evolved on the original xbox when I was like 8 and I knew these two were meant to be together. From the moment they met they had great chemistry and relied on each other! Cortana literally goes after people who have it out for John! John wants her approval and shows off for her in one of the books. 

I’ve already written too much here but like all of the games have John showing off for Cortana, making dry jokes, jumping out of things he shouldn’t. 

The whole point of this rambling is to try and get my thoughts about how to approach John’s character under control.

And that’s the thing. He’s lost control. He’s lost people, he’s losing his position and being phased out as an aging spartan, a relic. John’s used to following orders and making some decisions on the battlefield but it was always short term.

He has no identity beyond being a weapon. Complete the mission, clear the LZ, get put in cryo. Rinse, repeat. 

The timeline of the games are what I'm most familiar with but with the comics and books too it’s one long run from Halo 2 to Halo 4. Cairo station to the Dreadnought to the crash landing to Forward Unto Dawn to Requiem to “The Didact is Dead but not really but we’ll deal with him off-screen”.

I know Hood apparently gave John R&R orders before Halo 5 that he ignored and kept running himself into the ground. This is a man who has to keep moving and keep being useful. 

I imagine him giving in and seeking help as a last resort to fix any problems he has with performing his duties rather than helping himself be healthier. 

Any professional he sees is going to have to approach him like they’re approaching a self sacrificing feral cat, with lunch meat and quiet. This man needs to have his support network closer, set up long term goals, and do some serious, and most likely incredibly painful, self reflection on where he’s come from and where he wants to go. Get him out of that tin can and into therapy. I don’t have a nice neat ending because this was a ramble and also therapy is not neat and tidy. Thanks for reading my words about mr halo

[ninjakitty15]

Chapter 19: Good Impressions (Loki x OFC Pairing)

I looked in the mirror and couldn't help but grin widely, baring my teeth even as a sense of giddiness filled me. It was very rarely I ever actually dressed up or even really did much to prepare for an upcoming battle beyond gathering power, planning and making sure I had all my war ducks in a row, this was extra but it was the good kind in my opinion.

"You know...I read that the Spartans, the fiercest ancient warriors our world had at one point, would pretty themselves up before battle and spies from enemy lines that caught them doing that would overestimate them. Apparently real men don't wear makeup into a war," I told Loki who walked up behind me, watching me check myself out. "Funny thing is in this country and probably a lot of other countries today have this thing called war paint which might not make them look fabulous like a Spartan but it might as well be makeup as it's primarily worn on their face."

"I remember the Spartans, Odin was impressed by their tactics and way of life, especially their stand against the Persians, the odds weren't in their favor and yet somehow they gave them hell before defeat," Loki recalled.

"Quality over quantity," I added. "Those people were literally born to be warriors, only the strong babies survived the first of many tests they were forced into." I combed a hand through my hair, considered messing it but decided against it. "I used to be more of a silk or velvet kinda girl but I gotta tell ya, I'm really digging the leather. It's fashionable, it's sexy even, and it's pretty decent armor, I mean it's no breastplate or Kevlar vest but those are a bit too obvious and that's the last thing we want right now." I took a few swaggering steps, glancing at my backside curiously to see how it all fit together.

"You're enjoying this entirely too much," he mused.

"I know it hasn't been that long since we met, but are you really surprised at this point?"

"No, not really. How long are you gonna fawn over yourself in the mirror before we actually put this plan into motion?"

"Relax, I got this. I just gotta get a few things down pat before we jump head first into this oncoming shit storm." I grinned again. "What's the hurry?"

He watched me, a glint of amusement in his eyes as he shook his head at my antics. "You got the smile right and I'm not sure how you were able to copy my walk so quickly but the humor needs to change if you insist on chattering before things get started."

"But...humor is why I'm still kicking," I protested. "And it's a far cry from your own, which mind you I'm glad you have any at all, some other gods can't seem to grasp that concept despite being eons old. Still, it's a lot more...eloquent than I'm used to."

"Then perhaps don't say anything at all."

"And leave you to do all the talking, hell to the no, spank you very much."

"What's wrong with me doing the talking for once?" he crossed his arms in challenge and arched an eyebrow, daring me to answer.

I gave the god an unapologetic and unamused look. "I'm not the only one that's been muzzled here, maybe your brother was onto something when he did it to you."

"How dare you? You take that back right now!"

"Or what? Whatcha gonna do, huh? Take your shot, green boy, you got me deadbang."

The sound of someone clearing their throat loudly interrupted our usual bickering match and we both turned to see a half amused half arachnid smirking at us with his unnaturally muscular arms crossed as well. "You know this is technically playing with yourself, right? I mean if that's the case, could you get a room that isn't the only bathroom in the apartment, please?"

"How long since this plan was in motion did you wanna use that joke?" I teased the kid.

Peter shrugged and pretended to look bashful but now that he too was throwing in dirty jokes, the facade of him being an innocent kid was now out the window. "You sure I can't tag along?"

"Kid, you got your own enemies to fight and this might be a bit above your skillset which means if you tag along theres much less chance of you coming back."

"But you could just bring me back yourself, right?"

I scowled at his optimism. "Doesn't work that way, I only bring back the ones that can't pass on on their own and want another chance at tying up loose ends, and you better not be one of those people, you're a kid, which goes against my personal code of bringing back zombie kids, that's just fucking depressing having an army of rotting midgets."

Peter sighed in despair and slumped his shoulders. "I never get to do anything fun."

I rolled my eyes at his whining. "I'd also be held responsible for letting you come with and I kinda don't want to be hunted down by a team of go getters and fancyass technology, no spank you. I already have Hydra for the latter. So do me a favor, sit your five dollar ass down, before I make change."

Peter scoffed at my implied threat but stopped bugging me, it might have been his plan that could get the odds in our favor but it sure as hell wasn't his fight and I had no intention of dragging another cute super powered person into my personal vendetta. "Aunt May says you can come back anytime, just give one of us a heads up next time...and maybe something that gets black bloodstains off any surface just in case."

I would've blanched if I wasn't pale already. "Oh no, did I ruin something, I can pay for that."

"No no, just, I think she thinks you'd only come here if you're in trouble like you were this time and she's worried you might miss a spot next time if that's the case, normal blood you can just use hydrogen peroxide, but I'm not too sure it works on corpse blood."

"Noted and tell her thanks for everything, same goes for you of course since you were the one to let us in before she agreed to it. And also not informing the A team, that's important...you didn't tell them right?"

"Not like they take me all that seriously or even answer my calls if I did," Peter muttered. "You're all good there, promise."

"Excellent! You stay sharp and cute, the second either of that fails, you're fucked."

"Thanks, I think."

"Right then." I turned to Loki with another smirk. "How's this for a first impression?" I asked in smooth sorta British sorta something else accent.

He scowled at me but couldn't complain it seemed. "I'm getting the sense you've been working on that before this came to pass."

"Anyone can do an Avenger impression, hell anyone can wear their costumes, right Peter? But I'm not about the hero life, so why waste time on them when I've been giving it all to you?"

Loki was silent at this and it was Peter that actually responded to me. "That was actually really sweet."

"You say that like it's a surprise, physically dead here, not emotionally dead, thank you. My heart hadn't reached that stage where it becomes calcified like a fetus that won't leave its womb."

"You always have the oddest choice of metaphors," muttered Loki. "So you have the walk, the voice, the smile even though I'm not sure that's even necessary at this point."

"When are you going to prepare for the plan then?" I challenged. "Go on, see how well you know your part."

"Don't you worry about my side of the plan, I've been doing this sort of thing for the sheer fun of it long before you decided to do it out of sheer boredom."

I snorted and rolled my eyes at him. "Yes, we're all very aware of your old age, you don't have to remind us like we have to remind you, old man."

"Ye of little faith," he mocked, earning a bar of soap flying at his face he was lucky enough to duck. "Your aim needs improvement."

"I'm sorry, did you actually want to be hit in the head by something solid and hard and not a pillow, because I missed on purpose, you cotton headed ninny-muggins."

"Seriously, is all you two do bicker at each other?" asked Peter.

"Well I mean you wouldn't let us have any real adult fun while we crashed here so we gotta get that pent up energy out somehow, right?" I reasoned.

"She's not wrong," Loki agreed.

"Besides, no one's getting hurt from it, I'm convinced this is our own special way of showing we love each other without being a bunch of saps. I'm 99 things but a sap ain't one."

"What's wrong with being affectionate?" asked Peter, almost sounding offended.

"That implies I have more emotions than I'm willing to admit to anyone including myself, I'm generally not ok with having that much feels." I grinned, slicked back my hair again before doing a little dance for funsies.

"I'd refrain from doing that little jig when the plan's in full swing," warned Loki though he was still smiling in amusement.

"Oh but I like this," I purred with the accent again.

The smirk on his own face twisted, like I said something that somehow offended him and all his ancestors and pissed him off or deeply upset him. "Don't make me take it away from you till right before the fight starts."

"Oh come on, maybe you just need to hug it out and join the fun, bring it in, big guy." I opened my arms wide for emphasis. "There's no better love than self love."

He rolled his eyes at my stellar pun and green magic rolled over him as he changed into character. "I bet you were just dying to make that joke."

I stared at him and it was my turn to glare. "Was that your attempt at a dead joke? Oh hun, you gotta do better than that to fit the bill."

"Don't patronize me, woman, I wasn't even trying then."

I walked over and patted his cheek just to mess with him. "Sure you weren't. Do me a favor and work on that but also turn around for me."

"Why?"

"Just...do it."

He did begrudgingly and I frowned upon studying his form thoroughly before he faced me again. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, you got it right, it's just...I didn't realize it looked like that and now I'm suddenly an insecure teenager. Peter, is this how you feel all the time because, dude, this really sucks and I feel for ya."

"You say that like you were never one yourself," Peter noted.

"I know I was but like, I don't remember what it was like then, I couldn't tell you what I was like as a teen."

"Why not?"

"No memory of it, at all."

"You mean like it was so long ago that you can't remember that far back or lots of stuff happened during it so fast that it's all a blur."

"I mean it's not even accessible, it's gone from my mind completely."

Peter frowned, probably trying to understand what I was getting at. "Amnesia?"

"Mindwipe."

"Like Bucky Barnes?"

"No, that's brainwashed...wait, those do sound synonymous, damn, hadn't even thought about that. Brainwashed is basically having your mind overridden and reprogrammed, there's memories there but they're not real ones. Mindwiped is just nothing there to reprogram at all."

"Did Hydra do that too?"

"No, Hydra can't touch this, something they need to have programmed in their heads for all the times they tried and failed any of their aims when they had me. I can't tell you the who, but I can tell you it was painless and done willingly and without regret."

"You chose to have memories taken from you?"

I nodded simply, unable to elaborate as per the deal.

Loki, knowing there was some things I couldn't talk about for reasons he wouldn't know until hopefully later, chose to cut in then. "I think that's enough curiosity for now, we should get going and finish the plan you concocted for us."

I smiled thankfully at Loki and nodded in agreement. "Yes, of course.  Parker, if I don't make it back by tomorrow...just wait longer."

"Stop teasing the child, Nell, you could be really testing his patience with your antics and we wouldn't be welcomed back."

"You wouldn't, I would because I'm a delight to be around." I strutted after him anyway and he shook his head and beckoned me out of the bathroom and unfortunately out of the apartment.

"The Hydra agents and people that turned on you would say otherwise."

"The Hydra agents don't even know what joy is, the only time they're smiling is when they think they're about to take over the world and people are dying around them...the traitors are just pussies which means it doesn't take much to make em weep."

"Again with the metaphors."

"Maybe you should start taking some notes, eh? Give you a head start seeing as I'm all caught up on my end, unless you got something to add there?"

"Well you still haven't proven you can get the mannerisms right and mannerisms maketh men."

"But we are not men..."

"No, we're immortals."

[slash-em-up]

Marry Your Monsters pt. 4

Husband and wife get reacquainted... biblically. Very NSFW!!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sleeping in Jesse’s embrace again was beyond comforting, and Miranda was incredibly reluctant to leave, even when her stomach or bladder needed relief.

She’d spent the better part of her pregnancy without someone there to anchor her, and she resented her body’s betrayal at making her leave now that she had it.

Jesse took her periodic departures in-stride and did little more than turn in the bed and drape his long arm back over her when she returned.

The analogue clock on the wall read 10:17 when Miranda woke to find herself alone in the cot. Whether that was AM or PM was harder to determine; but her internal timer said it was probably night.

Running a hand through her hair, Miranda scooted to the edge of the bed and reached for her purse, pulling the leather bag to her and rooting around for a hair-tie.

Locating one, she quickly put her blonde bob into a tail and meandered through the small room towards the bathroom.  

Damn, her back ached.  

She’d never take being able to bend over and crack her spine for granted ever again once this little terror was out of her.

Splashing some cold water on her face from the faucet, she took stock of the spartan quarters. There was no mirror in the bathroom, oddly enough – the medicine cabinet was laid bare, but filled with everything you might need for first-aid.

Which turned out to be very useful a few moments later, as Jesse strode back into the room with blood on his hands.

“Jesus, Jesse... are you ok?”

He shrugged before crossing behind her, still reluctant to have her look at him head-on.

He ran his hands under her arms, pressing lightly to her sides in an effort to distract her with his touch as he turned the faucet back on, running his knuckles under the stream.

“Did you punch someone? Fuck – you're bleeding pretty bad... Let me tape that...”

Miranda could feel Jesse’s chest expand and contract against her as he huffed in amusement.  

He’d often joked that she was like a mother-hen, and she continued to prove his playful teasing completely accurate as she inexpertly placed some gauze and surgical tape around his wound.

His long fingers wrapped around her hand for a light squeeze before coming up to tug at her ponytail questioningly.

“I had to get that rats nest out of my face for a bit... I didn’t see a blowout salon on my way in, so get used to it.”

In response, Jesse slid the tie down - freeing her locks before running one large hand across her scalp.

Miranda shivered a bit at the light scratch of his blunt nails against the back of her neck.  

It had been so long since anyone had touched her like that, that even the smallest hint of the passionate caresses they used to share was enough to fluster her.

She audibly gasped – the noise echoing through the small room – as Jesse’s hand moved to gently curl around one of her breasts through the thin linen of her dress.

Miranda’s back stiffened at the contact, causing Jesse to withdraw immediately.

A soft “No...” left Miranda’s lips at her husband's retreat.

Jesse paused – hands hovering by her sides – ready to remove himself completely at her prompting.

Slowly, her hand left its place clasping the sink, rising to guide the strong hand in front of her to one of the straps of her dress.

She licked her lips, listening to the heavy breathing of the man behind her.

Guiding his fingers, Miranda helped him lower the black fabric, baring one of her shoulders to his gaze.  

His chest rumbled with a silent groan, making her smile.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Needing no further prompting, Jesse made short work of the rest of her top and she leaned her head back into his chest at the feeling of the cool air on her breasts – heavier than Jesse remembered as he once again cupped them in his palms. A lovely side-effect of pregnancy.

Her nipples pebbled as the A/C turned on above them.

Miranda moaned and ground her hips back against him as he pinched and worried her soft, sensitive skin.

Jesse was delighted with her reaction – he'd always loved playing with her tits; but whether because of their time apart, or the additional sensitivity of her condition, Miranda was nearly panting from how wonderful his hands felt.

He’d deny it until the day he died; but having a gorgeous woman come apart in his arms – at his touch – while his face was the shambles it had become, was cathartic.  

And he was determined to express his appreciation by making his wife cum as hard as she could.

One part of him was furious that he couldn’t bury his face between her thighs or suckle at the milk starting to well from her breasts; but he pushed that aside in favor of ripping the seam of his wife’s dress until she stood nearly naked in a pool of black.

Maybe the underwear she was currently sporting weren’t the sexiest he’d ever seen her in... but the way she was panting and rubbing her thighs together, desperate for any bit of friction, made her more attractive to him than ever.

She was still turned against the sink; but he could see one curious blue eye peering at him over her pale shoulder.

He wished she knew how widely he wanted to grin as he slowly slid her panties down her hips, making sure to run his thumbs over her ass as he went.

She’s always been his queen; but standing before him like this she was closer to a goddess. All those supple curves softened by her pregnancy; sensitivity heightened until she nearly wept for his touch...

He wished he could marry her all over again.

Jesse was still trying to determine why Preston had brought her here – knowing the man, it wasn’t for anything good; and likely it would have been better if she’d stayed exactly where she had been – for both of them... but fuck if he wasn’t ecstatic when she pushed her hips back with a whine, moaning at the feeling of his erection against her.

Reaching back, he quickly undid the ties holding his hospital gown together and let it join the remnants of her dress on the floor. If he couldn’t get his mouth on her then by god, he was going to get as close to her as he possibly could, in whatever ways he could.

Miranda whimpered as he bent her further over the sink, constantly mindful of her stomach, making sure the precious bump wasn’t pressing against anything harmful.

He didn’t even need to prompt her to spread her legs; she wanted him inside her, connecting them both in ways deeper than words ever could.

Though tall for a woman, Miranda still needed to hoist herself up on her toes to get her pelvis closer to Jesse’s - no mean feat with the extra weight around her middle.

The slick running down her thighs cut short any teasing Jesse might have started at her desperation, but he couldn’t resist running one of his hands between her legs – feeling that warm velvety softness tremble and give beneath his roaming fingers.

“Jesse... Please!”

She writhed and moaned as he slid one, then two long digits into her dripping hole – prepping her for his cock.

Her insides gripped his fingers tightly, holding him in as if her cunt had missed him just as much as she had.

He curled his body over her, pressing his chest to her back and inhaling the sweet smell of her sweat – her sex – everything uniquely Miranda.

This new position gave him space to curl his fingers inside of her and rub at that delicious gland that made her buck and cry out as he pressed it mercilessly.

She was gasping like she did when she was getting close to her finish, and Jesse refused to stop until she did.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Miranda went rigid and her breath caught as Jesse brought her to orgasm.

He hadn’t even touched her clit, the bastard.

His wrist rolled in time with her hips, keeping constant pressure on her g-spot until she was sure she was about to black out from pleasure.

She batted at his hand until he let up and as she sucked in air like a drowning woman he pressed his mask lightly back into her hair, inhaling deeply.

“...Fuck...” Miranda gasped.

She pressed herself into a standing position, and Jesse moved to accommodate her; backing up and turning ever so slightly as she moved to face him.

His remaining eye was blown wide, and his considerable erection pressed eagerly against her with every inhale.

She brought up her hand to caress the side of his neck, and after a moment of hesitation he softened into her touch.

“I want to ride you... I want to watch you cum inside me... please...”

Jesse paused, considering.

Damn, he could never deny her anything...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Fucking son of a bitch...”

Preston muttered the insult under his breath as he raised the glass of ice up to his jaw.

The bruise from Jesse’s fist driving into his face was already looking pretty spectacular and would probably only get worse – but it was proof-positive in his mind that Jesse was losing his touch.

Going soft.

Even taking liberties with a woman like his wife shouldn’t have driven the man Preston had kiss-assed to for years into such a public and emotional explosion.

Though Preston had to admit, Miranda was a fucking wildcat, even with that nasty parasite growing in her.

Lowering the tumbler, Preston zoomed in on the naked bodies moving together on his computer screen.

His eyes flicked over the scene as he quickly unzipped his pants and palmed his cock.

Jesse Cromeans was finished.

He just didn’t know it yet.

[buttsonthebeach]

For the director’s commentary thing: The entire Ch 15 of Reckoning. The juxtaposition during Solas’ lead up to having to go back to the roll of Fen’Harel got me so emotional. The contrast between hating/loving the power and detachment that comes with what much be done. I’d love to know more about what you feel his thought process would be after the events, the temptation of just existing neutrally after unleashing so much hell on these asshats. It’s awesome, please give me more!

AHH yes this is a good one!! Thank you for this ask! Commentary below the cut!

I do have to start with Ellana, because rereading this opening had me laughing:

Ellana was certain that war was mostly paperwork.

Paperwork, and a worry that gnawed its way into her bones. A burrowing insect like the kind that destroyed aravels and trees. Tiny and unstoppable and devastating.

If her time as Inquisitor started to convince her of these things, her time as High Commander of Enasan only solidified it.

(High Commander was a stupid title, and she hated it, but she also understood its political necessity. She outranked all of the field commanders, but while her role was primarily political, she was not royalty. Enasan was a republic. She'd lobbied to be called regent, but was overruled.

"Regent makes it sound like you are waiting for something," Arlanal pointed out. "Like you are waiting to step aside."

I am , Ellana thought.)

But while her time as Inquisitor had at least featured long stretches in the field, where she could loose her frustration and fear through her arrows, this war had been nothing but talk for her. Aside from that initial foray to the mountain pass where the first true battle of the war took place, she had not been in the field for more than an hour or so at a time. And even those forays were spent at a distance from the fighting, watching through a spyglass. And they were blisteringly quick visits. Ellana never thought she would dislike the Crossroads, but she hated how quickly she would go from her office in the capital to some outpost or fortification or battlefield. At least when she was Inquisitor she had the leisure of those long rides, or hikes, just her and her companions, where she could shed as many of the layers of her title as she dared.

Now there was no reprieve.

This whole fic was an exercise in “how far can I push my characters out of their element” in a lot of ways, and I think this is probably one of the clearest moments where you see that for poor Ellana. I also have to say that her internal commentary on the title High Commander is a direct nod to me figuring out what her title would be, since President sounds far too modern, but it still couldn’t be a title associated with royalty. I started with “Commander in Chief” and then worked back to something that sounded more fantastical.

(Also, poor Ellana, trying to wriggle her way out of every title she has ever been given. That’s why I bring it back in the epilogue, and say that the titles Mamae, vhenan, Hahren Ellana, and Mamaela are the only ones she truly accepts)

Once I established the idea of paperwork, of how different this war was from the other wars Ellana fought in, how helpless she feels, I could keep coming back to that idea to build up the sense of tension within her, as I did right before she blows up at Solas: 

She’d flung the paper but it was not an arrow. It did not fly straight and true. It did not give her the physical release of her bow. The physical release that had been lost to her for two decades and more. The sense that she could fight. That she could pick up a weapon and do something about the dangers that surrounded good people, people who did not deserve it. That she could protect people.

Now all she had was another stupid title, and paperwork.

Then I had to make sure that she was so tunnel-visioned on all of those issues that she wasn’t paying attention to any of Solas’s more subtle cues that he is also suffering under their personal helplessness. Ellana is usually very attuned to the emotions of other people, and Solas by this point is usually far more open with her, so it was interesting to write those short little exchanges where she comes in, vents, and he only has two or three words for her, and she isn’t thinking straight enough to understand why that is. It was so important to me to show that even a good marriage, even one that has lasted a long time, still has failures in communication.

I’m also following a very typical writer’s trick that I learned in my upper level fiction class in college, which is to do things in threes to get maximum impact, which is why we get three snippets of Ellana venting and frustrated and Solas seemingly unaffected before we hit the scene where she finally loses her temper:

Solas snorted. “Would you be served by my anger?”

She wanted to strangle him.

“At least I would not feel alone in my anger if you seemed to feel - something!”

But as she said the words, she turned, and saw his face, and it was the face of the man she loved. And it was raw with pain and rage.

“I would think that you, of all people, would know not to accuse me of having no feelings just because I am hiding them.” His words had an edge she hadn’t heard in - gods, in years.

She was a fool. A temperamental fool, no better than the squabbling youth who’d been hauled before her Keeper for picking fights with other youths who picked on her for the darkness of her skin.

Ellana’s temper is something we see less and less of as she gets older in the series, and it was also important to me to point out that as she is subjected to this immense pressure and helplessness, she’s going to start resorting to behaviors she used in the past, even as far back as her childhood.

I also did my best to show that Solas is cracking here through how I wrote his dialogue - he ordinarily speaks very smoothly, in long, well-thought out sentences, but here I broke up his thoughts frequently, showing his agitation:

“You hand me papers like the one you handed me tonight,” he did not look at her as he said it, but she winced at his choice of words. As she always was, she was embarrassed by her loss of temper already. “And I see the number of the People we lost, and I think of how many I could have saved with a single spell. I am not all that I once was, but I am not helpless, and yet this war has made me feel only that. And yet none of this is your problem, and so I should bear it, and see this through - but - vhenan - if we lose this war - if we lose our daughter - while I sat by and did nothing -”

He’d turned back to face her as he said the last of those words, and there was no mask at all anymore. There was only her bondmate, as sad and lost and angry as she was. Her frustration with him loosened more. She was not as alone as she thought. Solas did not have the paperwork (the fucking paperwork ) or the responsibilities she did. But he carried the same helplessness. They were together in that. She stepped close to him, and pulled him down, and kissed him hard.

"Let's go," she said when they parted. "And let's stop being helpless."

And at the end of the section we get one more repetition of paperwork as the symbol of everything Ellana hates - I didn’t count, but I think that is also the third one, tying back in to that rule of threes - and oh my god I just realized that I themed this entire chapter around the word helpless as well which ties directly back to The World Turned Upside Down and Ellana’s role as Eliza. Wow. I didn’t even realize I was doing that.

As far as the next scene goes, where we switch to Solas’s POV, I was drawing on two main things - the idea of Solas as a weapon, which it seems like he was to Mythal, and which Ellana is now seeing him as, and the scene from 300 where Gorgo sends Leonidas to Thermopylae with the words “come back with your shield, or on it.” I always loved that scene because you can see the love in their eyes, but neither of them can acknowledge it physically or verbally, because they are political leaders, and because it’s not actually what Leonidas needs in that moment. He needs to be treated like another Spartan.

That’s how we got to this line:

“Come back to me,” she said, her voice quiet but her tone firm as steel. “That’s an order, Dread Wolf.”

And Solas, smart cookie that he is, does not miss what she really means here:

For more than twenty years now he had been the peacemaker, the partner, the father, the scholar. But Ellana had not called him vhenan, or even Solas , as he left. Ashara was not there to call him Papae . No. Ellana had called him Dread Wolf. And that was who he would be today. He would again where the mask of Fen’Harel, He Who Hunts Alone, the Bringer of Nightmares. Because that was what his people needed of him once again.

It felt better than he wanted to admit.

In terms of tension building, we get several more instances of the rule of three here - first with three times that the altar to Mythal has mattered in this series: Flemeth showing up in DA:I, shattering the last of Ellana’s faith in the gods, Solas and Flemeth meeting at the end of DA:I, and then Solas and Ellana meeting there during Body of Knowledge when she has considered leaving him. Then we get another repetition of three with one of my favorite headcanons/pieces of Solas meta, which is that Solas’s life is shaped by three women in this series: Mythal, Ellana, and Ashara.

Then we get three repetitions of the phrase “Go. Hunt. It is time for justice,” with the final repetition catching even Solas off guard, as he says he thinks the last word might actually have been vengeance. That ties into a great piece of meta we’ve heard about Mythal - that while she did once represent justice, she may have been corrupted over the millennia into vengeance.

I relied on all three of those repetitions, each of which is also somehow related to three, to build and then release the tension of Solas finally arriving at Shalasan and unleashing hell. Of course, we’re also relying on several things I’ve set up throughout the fic and even back into the previous fic - like how Solas knows it is not really Mythal within him, just as it is not really Falon’Din within Ashara - but on a sentence level, those were the tools I relied on to make that scene happen.

I also have to shout out my two deliberate Hamilton references here, for fun: “You cannot be everywhere at once, Dread Wolf” and “Why are you telling me this?”. I am a sucker for sneaking them in everywhere :)

Oh man, I missed the second part of what you asked! In terms of his thought process after, I think Ashara is the thing that immediately grounds him and reminds him he can’t give into this side of himself totally. That’s why it was important to me that she is the first person who goes and sees him, that he leans on her just as much as she leans on him in that moment. He can risk the rest of the world seeing him as a monster, but he can’t risk his daughter seeing him that way, so he always has to come back.

Thank you for the ask!!! it was such fun to go back through that chapter.

[selkiewife]

Harlots 3x07 Liveblog

Part 2 (Part 1 here)

Spoilers Below

TW: abuse, violence, past abuse, slavery

Fanny is so done with Rosamund 😂

Ughh I don’t like Harriet giving Hal a cut of her money... at least she talked him down and maybe he will find Jack? I doubt it though. We’ll see...

Honestly I’m done with you too Rosamund. Also don’t threaten Nancy. Thanks.

It’s so interesting to see Lucy Wells play against someone like Kate. Or when she had a scene with Amelia last season. She still strikes me as like the “sweet naive” girl. But then when she comes face to face with those other characters she seems as tough as Mags and Charlotte. It’s always so jarring- but in a really good way.

Ok the best delivery of the episode just went to Lydia and Blayne:

Lydia: We should keep our enemies close. Blayne: We should keep our enemies dead.

I love Lucy in menswear and this surprises absolutely no one... oh God she’s bringing up the Spartans. Damn woman.

Whoa! Did Lucy just steal that horse or was it hers? Because being a horse thief is not a good thing if you are already going to debtors prison. Didn’t they hang horse thieves? You gotta respect it though- she’s a real Wells woman.

Omg Lucy saying she needs to see Charlotte 😭. Give me more of Fanny and Lucy my HEART.

Oh good I think that was her horse after all (shut UP about the horse, selkie)

Oh wow- the sex worker that should have been Prince Rasselas has been in love with Fredo this whole time! Aww. I think I got that feeling in another scene with him as well. For a show that moves as break neck fast as this one, they certainly hire actors who can deliver the emotional weight of a story in like 3 seconds 👏 👏. You’ve done well, lad, even if I don’t know your character’s name and you’re not Rasselas.

Oh Lydia saying Kate reached the “pinnacle” of their profession. She’s so proud of her. Lol I’m sure something sinister is about to happen but I feel happy for them for a minute.

Omg Emily so wants to believe that Hal is “a good man” but I noticed that he did not respond when Emily said “oh, then you are trying to dupe the Lord?” He lies by omission a lot- like when he made Emily believe that Isaac killed Charlotte.

Lydia and Nancy! I’ve been waiting for this. And... it’s fucking heartbreaking. A little worried that Nance told Lydia she has killed but that threat felt good. Also so happy we know more about Nancy’s childhood in the workhouse 💔 

I knew Harriet did the right thing by making Knox feel guilty! I really hope they get Jack back next episode, but I like that they seem to be continuing this story into next season - because it definitely needs more time to do it justice- just like the Spartan thing spanned two seasons.

I don’t care what anyone else says, this scene between Nance and Isabella is GOLD. “Are you completely cracked?” “Not in the least.” The timing is hilarious.

My new sexuality is Lady Isabella Fitzwilliam saying “I hope it fucks him. Right up the ass.”😂

Mad respect for Kate “I’m the rescuer” Quigley. Bring that bastard down.

YES NANCY! Ah!!! She hit him right in the face! Lady Isabella kissed Nancy everyone!!! Kate’s acting here is beautiful. I love that the kiss happened and Nance’s reaction was completely in character. Ughh. I need to write an entire post breaking that moment down now.

That’s right, stand up for yourself Fredo. Now go find Not-Prince Rasselas and be happy! Also loved Elizabeth’s line delivery about having the utmost respect for people like her son and Croft.

Ughhh... things were just going so great and now Lydia had to see Croft and Fredo. What the hell. No.

Oh man.... Emily and Hal just got WAY too Nancy and Bill Sykes for my liking...

Oh Lydia... fuck this. Wouldn’t it be amazing Lydia, Kate, Lucy, Nance and Isabella all banded together to bring him down? Not that they would all magically become friends, but just that they would realize the necessity of taking out that evil. Lydia doesn’t need Blayne now that Kate’s got the Prince’s ear. Bring the mother fucker down together.

Hopes for the last episode:

Jack Lively will be rescued but Harriet and North will continue their mission to save others.

Emily will get away from Hal. 

Nancy will have an emotional scene with Lady Isabella where we will find out even more about her past. Lady Isabella will talk about how Charlotte helped her to be emotionally brave and will help Nancy to do the same. Nancy will end the season COMPLETELY SAFE, ALIVE, AND NOT ACCUSED OF MURDER.

Blayne will be brought down or severely weakened by Kate and the dream team (Lydia, Nance, Isabella, Lucy.)

We see a glimpse of Prince Rasselas at the Molly House in the last montage (since it is finally safe for him to return.)

We all find out that there indeed will be a Season 4 and Violet and Amelia will be back for it.

Hey, it probably won’t happen, but a girl can dream.

[riddleredcoats]

So I just finished AC: Odyssey...

I have thoughts...Many, many thoughts. 

(This is mainly for me so I can remember what I loved about this game when I replay it, or when my friends buy it and I don’t forget anything, but anyone wants to discuss Odyssey is 100% welcome)

Spoilers!!

We’re I’m doing this in parts.

1. The overall

Man, I always loved Greece, I always wanted to go to Greece and I always loved  Greek history... This game only made love it more and it actually made me look up price flights to Greece  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This game is really, really cool in that aspect - it made me feel like I was there, enjoying the sun, beaches, the killing bears/sharks/fucking boars. It looks amazing, the graphics are awesome and the views are to die for. Aesthetic 10/10

The boat mechanics are practically identical to Black Flag - but hey, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it. But the lesbian crew? perfect. talented. inspired. worth the 35$ I paid for the game alone.

The music is decent, but the sea shanties deserve a soundtrack of their own lbr. 

The fighting was really fun, the movements fast and the animation was distinct, really fun feel.  (full disclosure I played on easy settings, cause I enjoy feeling like my character is a badass that can just walk into any fight and you know what, that’s exactly what I got, some enemies fell down with one blow. Super fun experience. Next playthrough Imma do a higher difficulty tho.)

2. The Family Storyline

I actually finished this one pretty quick. Everyone came out alive and well and living on the Adrestia. It was good drama, and I really loved Myrrine - she was incredible lbr, the only woman who can make Kassandra do anything with a single look.

I kinda liked Nikolaos too, in a weird way - even if he’s still an asshole. Spartan’s determination to have/be the best Nation was eventually its downfall, so I think it fits Nikolaos...He is a shitty father, he’s a good Spartan.

 Stentor is kinda meh, but his little spats with Kassie/Alexios are golden.

Deimos!Alexios is such a little shit, and his VA does a good job of portraying the asshole/bad guy, even if there were 1 or 2 cringe moments.

Barnabas is the only valid father figure in the game, there I said it! Y'all can @ me.

Herodotus is the weird and yet boring uncle. I approve of him and anyone who even looks at him funny will have to deal with me. 

Phoibe... Oh, Phoibe. The only moment where I actually felt a tear slide down my eye. I was emotional in other parts, but Phoibe’s death murdered me. 

3. The Cult of Kosmos...

I just wanna say to the asshole who spoiled me who the Cult Leader was... Fuck YOU! I mean honestly, it was a really cool reveal! Luckily he only spoiled it for me when I had done everything with Aspasia and I thought I’d never see her again, LMAO.

So yes, I saw Aspasia and I immediately fell in love with her. Like the second she walked into the scene I was hers. Just like that. 

I already knew of Aspasia - the real one - and like, it never even occurred to me that she might be the Ghost... Real!Aspasia was such a badass woman that needed no man but fell in love with Perikles and I never ever would have suspected her.

That final scene I have 2 complaints:

Why isn’t there an option to talk about Phoibe? I feel like it would be important and the forefront of Kassandra’s mind when she saw Aspasia again.

Aspasia sounded a little crazy? I mean I get HER, I do. The world was a mess - and let’s face it, it still IS - and I get her motivations and ambitions but her voice, her tone was too...dreamy, crazy? The VA for her was super good throughout the game, but I wonder what that part might have sounded like played differently... I dunno, it was hard to take her seriously. But I did let her live (and I kissed her...I am only human after all.)

4. The ‘’Atlantis’’ storyline.

So um... Kassandra dies, which, OUCH.

That part where she speaks Ancient Greek as she dies practically stabbed me in the heart lbr here, cause I imagine she hasn’t really spoken it for soo long (and no one has spoken it in so long). So, she says a prayer for herself cause she knows no alive knows how to do it the proper Greek way and I just... sobs. And as if it isn’t enough she just sounds so tired, so defeated, as if seeing humanity making the same mistakes over and over again broke her a little bit.

Loved going around Greece and fighting all the myths. ISTG, it was honestly one of the most fun parts of the game. The Minotaur is my fav, the aesthetic of the labyrinth was everything and Ardos was such a cute/asshole kid. Really liked the ‘’Medusa’’ too, but more the fighting it part -  it required a little more brain than the others - but that sick looking forest was 10/10.

Pythagoras was an asshole, but I knew that in fifth grade when I had to learn his fucking theorem.

Now we wait to see what Layla does with the staff. It will probably break me and I won’t be able to look at Herme’s staff the way ever again...

5. The Romance...

Kyra was my favorite romance in the game, their scenes were romantic but with a little air of tragedy still. It was well done, really. And the characters - Thaletas and Kyra - felt as if they had a little more thought put into them than some others. 

I really liked Roxana too. They were adorable, by far the best ending for any romance that I saw. 

Odessa was the only one I didn’t romance, mainly cause she gave weird vibes... 

Yes, I felt weird vibes with Odessa - who arguably also ends up with a decent romance ending - but not with Aspasia? I’m hopeless. My love for slightly evil women will be the end of me. I’m at least 30% sure I’ll end up unknowingly married to a serial killer...

But my favorite pairing for Kassandra tho? Aspasia. No doubts, no regrets, no takebacks. Everything about them is bathed in history, drama, and attraction.

We all agree that the first time Kassandra sees Aspasia, she basically has heart eyes. Right? That scene was so gay, I felt straight in comparison... And Aspasia was practically eating her alive with her stare. 10/10 sexual tension. 

The dynamics are really interesting... They both want the same thing but feel there are different ways to get it.  Yes, I know Aspasia was in the Cult that put everything in motion but like that the beauty of it. Aspasia knows its wrong, she knows she did wrong (and she probably wasn’t in the Cult when they interfered with the Oracle to throw Alexios off the Mount Taygetos). 

Also, Kassie is Spartan and Aspasia is Athenian (technically). Two lovers -  a Spartan and an Athenian - in the Peloponnesian War? Yes, please.

So, Drama? Double Check  

The Kiss. Like, don’t get me wrong I loved it and I definitely kissed her (#noregrets), but I wish it would have a little more build up

[sirrobin126]

This is going to be long as hell. 

Okay, so ages ago @thiievesandbeggars​ gave me a massive ship hc ask meme thing and I’ve finally done it, after adding bits and pieces every so often while I was studying. Most of it is going to be under a cut because it is, honestly, hella long.

Also, yeah its for Mionel in case you somehow didn’t guess that already.

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle?

Martha’s a very affectionate person and quite a touchy person. She doesn’t hide that or hold herself back when she cares for someone. Lionel is…new…to the concept of selflessly giving physical affection that leaves him vulnerable. That being said, although he doesn’t initiate cuddles to begin with, he is very into them when they happen. Martha can often find herself glancing at the clock on the wall and like half-regretting starting a Lionel hug when she had things to do that day. But she never really regrets it because he hugs like he hasn’t touched another person in years, even if they were together that morning. Martha swears up and down she saw him wipe a tear away once after an extended cuddle period but Lionel insists he just had a bit of kryptonite in his eye.

Who is the little spoon?

Martha, she is little and likes being the little spoon. She was used to it with Jonathan, who of course was a big strong loving protector man, and she just feels safe and comforted that way. I wanted to be cheeky and say Lionel, but I feel like he’s just too into looking at Martha, too set on protecting her from the outside world, and too uncomfortable being that vulnerable to turn his back on her.  

Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  

Look, from the very moment they decided that maybe they could become a thing, and Martha indicated that she was open to a real relationship with him Lionel had to physically restrain himself from immediately pulling her close to him and kissing her like the world was ending. Every so often when they’re together Lionel will just get this wave of, ‘this is her, she’s here, there she is!’ and if they’re somewhere where it’s not ideal to start making out he will be in a state of absolute suffering and hold her hand, or touch her waist or trace his finger over her shoulders, because, there she is, with him.

Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?

I mean, Lionel is a very dirty old man, with a very varied sexual history, and a very skewed sense of “the appropriate” (see: naked at work and fucking Lex’s girlfriend). He wouldn’t do anything that made Martha uncomfortable, but he does linger at the boundaries of acceptable behaviour.

How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?

Like I said, a Lionel cuddle is difficult to start, and even more difficult to end. He’s not like, good, at judging how regular humans interact with each other, and he is not great at being a reasonable person. It’s fine when they’re sitting on the couch both reading or whatever and cuddling, but it’s not quite as fine when Martha has to get to the farmer’s market in five minutes but she just heard Lionel calmly exhale and felt his shoulders drop in relaxation which he never does and damn that’s nice but also if I don’t leave right now Helen McGregor is going to get to those good Rutabagas and take them all like she always does.

Who gives the most kisses?

They both like to, but if we’re talking not necessarily sexual kisses, its Martha. She kisses when she sees him. She kisses when she leaves. She kisses when she has to get up and go to another room. She kisses when she just feels a swell of affection or emotion come over her. Lionel loves this, because its not like she’s trying to get anything from him, or trying to make him do anything, she was just doing something and thought she’d let him know that she cares about him and then move on. Its not a super familiar feeling for him so he is disproportionally charmed by it.

What is their favourite non-sexual activity?

Probably discussing life philosophies and morality, or at least, that’s what they seem to spend a lot of time doing. They also like going to the theatre (Martha likes musicals, Lionel likes the opera, and they’ll both watch plays quite happily). Also book club. (Their book club is only the two of them, they alternate who gets to choose the book, they have a lot of variety)

Where is their favourite place to cuddle?

I wanna be cheesy and say the garden where they had that first convo but like, if Lionel has the choice between being outside and not being outside, he will choose the latter. So, I imagine they’ve set up a joint study for them both so they can both work on their individual stuff and still be together, and there’s like a bookcase and a nice couch where they can sit when they’re not working.

Who is more likely to playfully grope the other?

Lionel. Although, I don’t know if playful is always the right word to describe it. Cause that implies that its just a joke, and while he may play it off like that, if Martha took him up on it he would be immediately dtf, like just, on a moment’s notice.

How often do they get time to themselves?

Not often, which is why they have to find spaces they can be in. They both have jobs that are really intense on their time, although Lionel has a bit more freedom in that regard because he can choose to take days off at a time if he wants (and go stalk a teenager to find out what they know about aliens). But even though they’re officially a thing now, Lionel still keeps a little bit of distance from her working life to avoid giving her detractors any more ammunition to throw at her about being in the pocket of big business, which, is so absolutely not true that it’s laughable. Martha may try to find compromises and may treat business v politely, but if they tried to manipulate her into going against the people’s best interest she would shut that shit down quick smart. If anything, big business (Lionel) is subject to her demands way more. But, she’s concerned about what they would say, so Lionel doesn’t turn up to her work anymore than anyone else’s spouses (despite his natural tendency to butt in and interfere everywhere he can).

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children?

No. No, no. Even though they’re a pairing of the man who can’t help but have children, and the woman who wants to adopt every sad looking child that walks past her, they’re both past the point where they can spend another eighteen years raising a child. Also they have very different ideas on what having children is for, you know: love and support vs power struggles and passing on a legacy.

If so, how many children do your muses want/have?

Martha has one, Lionel has had four that we know of.

Who is the favorite parent?

Martha is everyone’s favourite parent. I mean, come on.

Who is the authoritative parent?

Authoritative or authoritarian?

Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school?

Martha is tough but fair int his department, she’ll always want Clark to go to school, but she will take into account how tough things can be for him sometimes and cut him some slack. Lionel is more of the Spartan method, if you can sneak out of school and not get caught, go for it, excellent. If you get caught though, he won’t swoop into to save you unless it going to negatively affect the Luthor reputation.

Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around?

Martha isn’t constantly baking for nothing you know.

Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children?

Support or brag? Lionel turns up to Lex’s chess matches the same way Lucius turns up to Draco’s quidditch. Because he thinks he has some skill at it and wants to reap the benefits of that in a place where he can be recognised for his son’s achievements. He’s a bad dad.

Who goes to parent teacher interviews?

I mean Lionel went to them but goddamn, someone trying to tell him how to raise his kids? That did not go down very well. He did listen though in case there was anything there he needed to throw back in Lex’s face when he was thirty during an unrelated argument. He is not a good father.

During middle school, Martha of course was like, deep in the pta, and she ooooowns the fucking bake sale/school fete. Alice from down the road tried to take the crown a few years into Martha’s rule. This would have been fine with Martha if Alice had been nice about it when she decided that she was going to take care of the bulk of the organising and give Martha “a little stall for your cookies and things”. But Alice wasn’t nice about it, and Alice hadn’t communicated with her and had ignored Martha’s further questions. So it just couldn’t be helped that Martha made her stall bigger than the allotted space, because her question about space was never answered. She couldn’t help if it was decorated to the nines, more than any other stall (Jonathan spent a sleepless night glueing, and hammering and painting the stall’s wooden beams). She couldn’t help if she baked her fucking ass off and made confectionary creations the population of Smallville had never even heard of. She also couldn’t help that when she arrived at the fete, Alice’s organisation skills were poorer than average and Martha happened to have on speed dial every bouncy castle, entertainer and activity provider, with whom she already had a good relationship. She couldn’t help that everyone referred it to as Martha’s event. She couldn’t help that Alice was so embarrassed that she didn’t even show her face at the next pta meeting and meekly accepted whatever job Martha deigned to give to her the next year, which Martha gave her with a polite smile and excellent line of communication of course.

Martha later told Lionel that story when they were working together, as a metaphor for a business thing she was trying to argue with him about. Martha was a little embarrassed of it when telling it, but Lionel had to be excused after hearing how Martha absolutely destroyed her competitor and could be found running cold water over his face in his private bathroom before he could even think about facing her again.

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice?

Lionel is the more dramatic and emotional one so obvs him, when like, the mildest inconvenience happens to him, he stubs his toe and threatens the doorframe. But when Martha raises her voice, shit’s gotten real, and you best go over exactly what you’ve done to push her to the edge.

Who threatens to leave but never actually does?

Lionel’s not usually one for empty threats but goddamn he knows nothing better is ever going to happen in his life than Martha Kent. He’ll bluster and give his speeches and talk about how his philosophical point of view is right and correct and other opinions?? Never heard of them?? and he’ll say I might as well leave but he doesn’t even touch the door handle.  

Who actually keeps their word and leaves?

Martha. She’s not one to go over the top, she’s not one to overreact, so if she says she’s going to leave, things have probably reached a real breaking point. She’s probably thought it all out and considered it inside before you ever hear about it.

Who trashes the house?

Depends whose house they’re at, neither of them would trash the others stuff. I can see Lionel’s office just littered with paper and shit that he’s torn up in frustration. But Martha’s more likely to turn to the oven and angrily bake for about 24 hours until she calms down so the house is just covered in passive aggressive cupcakes that Lionel won’t eat out of spite.

How often do they argue/disagree?

Not actually that often. The points I made above are honestly rare cases with them. Like, when it comes to bickering then yeah, all the time, you can’t have two such different people, who are also very clever, together, and not expect half their conversations to be a debate of some kind. But those kinds of debates are playful, they’re not the end of the world and they’re also littered with Lionel making puppy dog eyes at Martha that she won’t concede his point and Martha loudly wondering how a man who is so smart can be so goddamn stubborn and single-minded. If it’s something important that Martha feels strongly about then Lionel will usually defer to her opinion and do his best to fight for whatever it is she wants, but Lionel’s an opinionated guy too so when their fundamental views of the world clash that’s when there are teething problems.  

Who is the first to apologise?

Martha is the first to apologise if she thinks he was really hurt by the things she said. Lionel is the first to apologise if he’s had a little time to let her viewpoint sit with him and he’s come around to it. Which is a privilege he bestows on Martha and Martha alone. He’s never apologised first to anyone else in his life unless he had a motive behind it. Lionel also apologises biggest and with flowers, whereas Martha’s is more of a frank face-to-face thing that acknowledges his feelings but doesn’t budge on her beliefs. Lionel would rather forget the whole argument and move along without getting into it.

Sex:

Who is on top? Who is on the bottom?

Bold of you to assume either of them would limit themselves to one position or the other. If you asked Lionel he’d say he was a top, if you asked Martha she would tell you that it was a very inappropriate question and she wasn’t going to answer. In her head she would say top as well. In reality they do much more sharing of both positions.

Who has the strangest desires?

Look, the strangest desire between either of them is that Martha looked at a smarmy, arrogant, casually ruthless, workaholic mess of a man who had done his level best to build his company at the explicit detriment of her town and neighbours and still went “Oh fuck, he’s hot.”

Any kinks?

Have you see Lionel? You take one look at that man and tell me he doesn’t deserve to be kinkshamed just for the general way he is. Lionel has both a praise kink and a love of being threatened. He likes a bit of ruffage, he likes to be tied up, he likes to tie people up. He’s not averse to hair pulling, he likes potentially dangerous settings, and anything with the threat of being caught thrown into it. He’s a dirty old man.  

Who’s dominant in bed?

In general, Lionel, because he’s got that whole ‘I am the deciding factor in the events of this world and master of the universe’ thing going on that he’s pretty committed to. With a lot of partners he’s very dominant, but if you know how to play Lionel he can switch to sub so fast you get whiplash. You just have to be able to follow through with your dominance or Lionel gets very smarmy and condescending and generally becomes an arrogant nightmare to deal with. Martha and Lionel don’t play into a lot of the dominance dynamics tho, it’s not usually been Martha’s speed.  

Is head ever in the equation?

If I ever publish my fanfiction you’ll know it is.

If so, who is better at performing it?

Lionel has had, a lot, of practice.

Ever had sex in public?

Lionel definitely has. But the closest the two of them came together was when they got drunk and made out in the coat room of a very important fancy party that Martha was super nervous about. Also on Lionel’s private plane, which Martha considers public but Lionel doesn’t.

Who moans the most?

Martha is very vocal, to Lionel’s absolute delight. Lionel moans too but he’s a bit more of a talker, to the surprise of no-one ever.

Who leaves the most marks?

Martha's got longer nails, so she occasionally leaves claw marks down his back which Lionel is very into. Lionel can give hickeys like a goddamn teenager, and he’s a territorial show off, but he doesn’t do it often because he’s above that thank you very much.

Who screams the loudest?

You better believe he’s doing his absolute best at all times to make her scream.

Who is the more experienced of the two?

Come on, he’s been a serial philanderer and an absolute horndog for decades. She had flings before, but honestly, Martha’s been with the same man since she was in her early twenties.  

Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?

They would both scoff if they ever heard that question asked, and each would assume the answer to be obvious. However, for Martha, this is a lot more adventurous and wild than she’s used to so she considers it the former. For Lionel, he doesn’t usually get this intense level of intimate romantic connection during sex so he definitely considers it the latter. They think they’re on the same wavelength.

Rough or soft?

Depends what they feel like. When rough, Martha gets to play into that dangerous aura Lionel’s got going for him, when soft, Lionel gets to consider what an angel she is at least once per second.

How long do they usually last?

Hey, I’m not going to say anything, but they are getting up in years.

Is protection used?

God, you know, for a man so cautious and meticulous in his planning, so paranoid and careful, he sure does have a lot of illegitimate children.

Does it ever get boring?

No, how could it when the whole relationship always feels new. They only have a certain amount of time together, and they’ve lived without each other for so many years that every word, every feeling, every touch is as exciting as ever. Also, Lionel voice: Martha Kent is a beautiful angel and I should be shot if I ever don’t think that in her presence.

Where is the strangest place they’d have sex?

The plane was pretty strange for Martha. Lionel’s giving it a while before mentioning any other strange places he would be into. His office for one, and also he has this thing about maybe churches, but he’s not going to push it.

Sleeping:

Who snores?

Lionel used to, but he got a very expensive operation to stop that because goddamit no ones gonna think he’s not perfect all the time. Martha snores but only after she’s been drinking, something Lionel found out about the first time he had to put her to bed drunk, because she’s so tiny but she was so difficult to move and he found it equal parts hilarious and adorable.

Do they share a bed or sleep separately?

Oh my god, if you think Lionel is going to ever not sleep in the same bed as Martha when he has the opportunity then you do not know Lionel Luthor.

If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?

Lionel likes to think of himself as a solid oak tree, lying there while Martha curls around him, which is true, sometimes. Lionel can also be classified as a bit of clinging vine, wrapping his arms around her as they falls asleep.

Who talks in their sleep?

Lionel is really bad for it. No-one has told him that he sleep talks, which he does, badly, but usually he falls asleep after everyone else so unless you wake up before him you don’t hear it. He will mutter anything from non-sensical sentences, to entire monologues and have fights with opponents about the stupidest thing. He doesn’t know he does it, he wakes up mad at people for dream reasons but he doesn’t know that he was actually fighting them. Martha mentions it off-handedly one day that he said something funny in his sleep and Lionel is just like ??? w hat. And Martha’s like, yeah you know, you were talking about this thing. And Lionel just, fucking, goes into this spiral of have I been giving away my plans for years? What is this betrayal of my own body?

What do they wear to bed?

Well, according to the comic, Lionel defs sleeps shirtless, if not entirely naked (This is the hill I will die on). I think he sleeps in nothing but expensive silky boxers, or silk pyjama pants. I think Martha wears cute patterned pyjamas.

Are either of your muses insomniacs?

Lionel has the most trouble sleeping, but he kind of ignored that it was a problem and started to think of it as a feature of his superhuman personality. He just started kind of working instead of sleeping and called it a day. He convinced himself that he had moved beyond regular sleep patterns and went to sleep late and woke up early every day, not quite connecting it with the giant crashes he would have every so often that he would put down to substance or alcohol related reasons, not considering that the crashes happened to coincide when work was particularly stressful and big deals were getting done. This was because his stress got worse than normal during those periods and his body had to finally give up and crash. Lionel just figured it was a product of business and that it would make him stronger, because he is an idiot with no capacity for self-reflection. As he got well into his 50s, he started sleeping in more because he still had trouble falling asleep but because his business was so stable and set up he just decided that as CEO he got to have later mornings than everyone else. That allowed him to finally get the amount of sleep regular people do, and also it feeds into his superiority complex and vanity that he is allowed to do something his employees can’t.

Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?

Martha was kind of horrified by Lionel’s terrible sleep patterns and the fact that he didn’t seem to see a problem with it, so she originally gave him some herbal remedies and tried to get him to like meditate and stuff, but when she realised that wasn’t going to work, she had him go to the doctor. So now he has a pill he can take if he’s having a particularly bad night, but they often sit untouched in Lionel’s bedside drawer because what, he’s going to sleep when he has work to do? I think not.

Who wakes up with bed hair?

Martha. It’s not like ridiculously bad, but its certainly a lot more wavy and unruly than when she combs and straightens it for the day. She doesn’t mind spending a little bit of her morning doing her hair, she doesn’t wear a lot of makeup or jewellery so doing her hair is kind of a nice morning ritual that she can spend time on now that she doesn’t have to be out in the field at a godforsaken hour anymore.

Lionel’s haircare routine happens at night, because he wants to wake up and essentially be ready to go. That wild look his hair has is actually carefully cultivated to look like that, and is helped by a humidifier he keeps in the bedroom, and the silk sheets and pillowcase he has is as much for his hair as his body. He also has a leave in conditioner and oil for his beard. Unfortunately when he has short hair it’s significantly harder to tame and so he will wake up with a few stubborn cowlicks that stick straight out from his head that he either has to leave like that or wrestle with (depending whether he is good or evil at that point)

Who wakes up first?

Martha, she’s been living on a farm for nearly forty years, and she’s got her morning “get ready and make breakfast” rituals set in. She just feels more ready to face the day when she’s had an early morning, like there are so many more hours of sunlight in which to get things done and be productive. When she sleeps in she always feels like she’s missed out on something.

Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?

Martha was always used to making breakfast while Jonathan was setting up for the day, and she likes cooking so she continues to do it. The first time she made breakfast in bed she made two plates of food and brought them back up and they sat in bed and ate them and although Lionel winced he didn’t say anything about food that might get on the silk sheets. So she does it sometimes and every time Lionel is very thankful and charmed but also like, these are very expensive silk.

Lionel has before made a big production out of breakfast in bed tho, like on Martha’s birthday he had a very fancy breakfast made at an upscale restaurant at Metropolis and transported to Smallville and brought it up to her on an eating tray that sat on a mini-table and there was a rose on it and a very nice looking, suspiciously present, cloth napkin that went over her legs (and the silk bedsheets). The most surprising thing of all was that he managed to wake up before her and set it up. Of course, he just didn’t sleep the night before but he’s not going to tell Martha that, and anyone else who helped is sworn to secrecy. He thinks it was a perfect surprise but Martha did wake up whilst people were still downstairs and Lionel was furiously whispering trying to get everything together, but she was kind enough to pretend to be asleep and wake up astounded at Lionel’s entrance.

What is their favourite sleeping position?

Lionel is him on his back with Martha curled up next his chest. Martha’s is on her side as the little spoon, with Lionel’s arm over her.

Who hogs the sheets?

Asleep and half-asleep Martha is nowhere near as patient and considerate as awake Martha, so if she gets cold during the night she will just pull as many blankets, or a Lionel, towards her as she needs. Similarly, if she is too warm, she will have no hesitation to throw the blankets off her and either pile them on Lionel or throw them on the floor.

Do they set an alarm each night?

Martha doesn’t anymore but Lionel does, his alarm clock is a radio that plays a Metropolis news channel for him to wake up to and immediately get the latest news and information about whats going on that he will need for the business day, even on the weekends.

Can a television be found in their bedroom?

Lionel hates watching television in the living room so there’s no way he has it in his bedroom. He’s a big fucking snob and he definitely thinks he’s better than tv. He hates that there are some things he kind of likes to watch (discovered in the long hours fixing clocks and setting up charities in his guest house at the mansion). He considers these quiz shows and murder mysteries beneath him, but if Martha’s watching he’ll act like he has no choice but to sit down next to her and watch as well. The only thing he watches voluntarily are the news and maybe nature documentaries, if he’s had a few drinks. He can’t watch history or science documentaries because he just becomes the embodiment of the “i know more than you” meme. Drunk Lionel is definitely the type to talk to his tv.

He’s also the biggest hypocrite about plebeian interests because he is an internet hound. He’ll turn his nose up at people that get all their info or entertainment from the news, but you try and pry that phone out of his hand, and see what happens. He’s always checking for updates and alerts on his phone and computer.

Who has nightmares?

Martha has always had a pretty standard mix of good and bad dreams. After Jonathan died they got worse, and often it was dreams that didn’t seem like nightmares at the time. But, just at the point in the dream where she was talking with Jonathan, or they were working the farm together, or they were having their anniversary dinner and he apologised for being late, she would wake up and for a moment she would still be in the world of the dream before remembering. Every time it was like losing him over again. It was the hardest immediately after his death. Then, as time went on and she started seeing Lionel, she found that although she kept having these dreams, it wasn’t as crushing to wake up from. She started seeing it more as Jonathan still watching over her, coming to visit her while asleep, joking about whatever was going on in her life and bitching about whatever thing Lionel had just done. Martha is still torn between thinking that it’s just her subconscious finding a way to work through problems she’s having, and really believing that Jonathan has found a way to still be with her.

Who has ridiculous dreams?

Lionel’s dreams are hectic as hell. He’s always late, he’s always chasing something, and he always has shit to collect. He’s had a lot of fucked up shit happen in his life, the feelings from which he’s repressed the fuck out of, so his subconscious feeds him a cocktail of high octane emotional anxiety. However, because his brain is a dick, it associates these emotions with the most whack scenarios that Lionel will never take seriously. How exactly is he supposed to connect the guilt and fear born of real serious actions and behaviours, to the fact that in his dream he and Richard Nixon have to collect every VHS copy of Jane Fonda’s original workout series and goddamit they’re already behind schedule! He has tried to induce lucid dreaming before, so he can make use of sleep time instead of wasting it like everybody else, but part of the process included keeping a dream journal, and after the fifth time he had to write down that he tried to get Darth Vader’s autograph (despite never having seen a Star Wars film) he just got too paranoid that someone was going to read about his stupid dream cycle and somehow use it against him. He burnt the book. Lionel also doesn’t have nightmares often, his regular dreams are stressful enough, but when does they are pretty goddamn harrowing, so, on par, he’s mostly okay with the ridiculous stuff most of the time.

Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?

Martha is the most active sleeper. Lionel’s a bad sleep talker in the first hour of sleep and closer to when he wakes up, but for the rest of it he’s dead to the world. He has such a tough time getting to sleep that when he’s in that rem cycle he is fucking out of it. Martha is a lighter sleeper and so she’s more likely to spread out or roll over or push Lionel closer to the edge and leaving him with a little sliver of space and she’ll have most of the bed for her own even tho she’s usually right up next to Lionel and the rest of the bed is untouched territory.

Who makes the bed?

Martha, or Lionel’s cleaner. It depends whose house they’re at and whether Martha managed to get to it before the cleaner could. Martha hates making any more work for the cleaners, and anything she can do herself she does. She begrudgingly acknowledges that in a place the size of the Luthor Mansion a cleaner is probably a good idea, but she feels very bad if she’s not doing her best to do all the stuff she can to reduce the cleaner’s work. Lionel does not understand, because he’s paying for someone to perform that service and that’s their job that they’re getting paid to do. Also, he probably wouldn’t care if the bed was made or not, unless it was for like the express purpose of taking someone to bed and having the room all done up nice and impressive. Otherwise it’s like, I could be working.

What time is bed time?

For Martha, bedtime used to be 9:30pm, only now she’s has a very bad influence on her time, and her work starts later, so there’s no set bed time anymore. She and Lionel will stay up much later than they should, but can you blame them.

Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?

Lionel, defs, he’s the grumpiest in general so the very idea of having to sleep makes him mad.

Work:

Who is the busiest?

Lionel is a workaholic with a huge number of interests and schemes that he needs to keep an eye on. He’s always got at least three things he’s actively working on in his head whenever he’s doing a single task. He also makes a habit of physically going out to places and doing things that a CEO doesn’t need to do. He could just delegate it to people while he sits in his office, but Lionel spends as much time out of the Luthorcorp building as he does in it. Martha finds her work very rewarding, and she works hard to help the people of her state and community, but she’s been around a bit now and knows the importance of a home life balance in addition to work. Lionel’s still unfamiliar with the concept.  

Who rakes in the highest income?

Look, I’m gonna give you three guesses.

Are any of your muses unemployed?

Nah, are you kidding me. Lionel goes weird if he’s not employed, boy starts fixing clocks and bringing out his multitude of very random but inexplicably mastered hobbies. Catch him in the studio painting full size realistic portraits and recording his one man jazz album as he asks you to pick a card to show off his excellent sleight of hand. Martha is also now reluctant to retire or leave her job, because she really feels like she can make a difference where she is. Also, she’s good at it.

Who takes the most sick days?

Ironically, Lionel. Like he’s the biggest workaholic and works works works forever. But he’s also an obsessive fuck who needs to take off days at a time to figure out why this teenager that his son is tangentially friends with is in a specific place and what they know about aliens. He also needs to very dramatically show up in places where people don’t expect him (when he could have easily sent an email) to complete his enigmatic image.  

Who is more likely to turn up late to work?

Lionel. He owns the company. He’s always been able to decide when turning up to the office is less important than intimidating or seducing someone somewhere else.  

Who sucks up to their boss?

;) ;) ;)

What are their jobs?

Lionel is the CEO of LuthorCorp, Martha is a Kansas State Senator

Who stresses the most?

God, they’re both stressers, Martha when she’s worrying about Clark and whether people are in danger or emotional turmoil, she’s very empathetic and cognoscente of the different things people are going through. On the other hand tho, Lionel’s body has known no moment of relaxation in his life, he gets massages not as a luxury but as a necessity or he’d snap like a brittle toffee next time someone brought him news he didn’t like.

Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?

They enjoy them for the most part, there’s always stress and frustrations that come with it, and Lionel’s job does have an inexplicably high risk of the CEO being hurled across various rooms, but ultimately, Martha’s in a position to affect change and put her education to good and effective use, and Lionel is his own boss and has power, money and influence on his side.  

Are your muses financially stable?

They’d better hope so because Lionel is not going back to a lower Momme count on his sheets, he’s earned it dammit.

Home:

Who does the washing, takes out the trash, does the ironing?

Lionel hires a lot of people to do the jobs he doesn’t want to. Pretty much all housekeeping in the Luthor Mansion is handled by staff, to Martha’s embarrassment. Like, she understands that this is a contract and people get paid to clean and do housekeeping but she can’t stand the idea of making more work for them so she always keeps anything she’s doing at the mansion pretty tidy so as not be like Lionel and just leave things around, knowing they’ll be put straight for him. She won’t hear of him hiring anyone for the Kent farm or the place in Metropolis tho. And she has gotten him to do housework before, just by being matter of fact about it. She was baking once and noticed that the bin was full so she asked him to take out the trash like it was an everyday occurrence (you know, like regular people) and Lionel was halfway to the garbage bins outside, holding a trash bag before he stopped and was like ‘wait - I have people for this’.

Who does the cooking?

Martha is a happy baker, a stress baker, an angry baker, a bored baker, the woman likes to bake and she is damn good at it. She’s also just an excellent cook in general so she does a lot of cooking for the two of them. Of course, she doesn’t do it all the time because she has a demanding job that often causes her to stay late at the office, so Lionel’s chef also does a good part of the cooking.

Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?

Lionel is lucky not to be banned from her kitchen without supervision. He treats cooking like a battle and the kitchen like a chemistry set. He got very pissed that cooking wasn’t something he was immediately good at, even though the first time he tried he was attempting stuff way too advanced for someone who probably hadn’t set foot in his own kitchen since 1983. After he failed the first few times he read a hell of a lot of books and did a lot of thorough research (you know, like a normal person) and made it his obsessive priority to get good. Yet, he still doesn’t have the magic touch Martha does and he won’t believe her that she just does what feels right. He could be a cordon blue chef by now and Martha ‘the recipe is more of a guideline’ Kent’s food would still come out better.

Who is messier?

Lionel, because he has the luxury of being messy and knowing that it will all be put straight by the time he comes back to it, but all his important and classified stuff is sorted and locked up of course. He’s not necessarily a naturally messy person tho, and if he didn’t have someone picking up after him he would get a lot neater quick smart because he doesn’t like living in a chaotic environment even tho he himself embodies chaos. Martha knows there is more important things in life than spending a lot of time cleaning up, and she has the patience to put things back as she uses them instead of rushing off to do something else immediately. She tries to tell Lionel its more efficient that way but he just can nOt expend those extra few seconds to clean up after a task, he has a new thing on his mind and he needs to get to it.

Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?

Lionel may be messy, but hell if his suits are going to pay the price for that. They’re going to be handled well and treated like the precious materials they are.

Who is the prankster around the house?

Martha, just because she can get away with it. Lionel never suspects her, she’s the one person he has a complete blind spot to when it comes to expecting tricks or betrayal, so she’s the one person who can get one over on him just by pretending to be in earnest. Of course he reacts in the most betrayed and offended fashion. One time Martha made him that fake food, like eggs and chips that actually turn out to be peach yoghurt and apples and Lionel eats it and just, gives her the most puppy dog hurt, lost expression. But Martha won’t acknowledge that it was a trick. She’ll just be like, no I just think you need to eat more fruit, even though it was obviously meant to look like eggs and chips.  She catches him playing a very sad song on the piano later when she’s in earshot.

Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?

Martha will and then she’ll get flustered and have to retrace her steps from when she came home and then find them beside the spice rack, or under a couch cushion. She eventually finds a bowl to put her keys in and puts it on an accent table near the door so that she won’t have this problem anymore. She has to train herself to put it there everyday but soon enough it becomes routine. Lionel, who has very different connotations for sets of keys in a bowl, does a small double take every time he sees it for the first little while, he doesn’t tell Martha why. Lionel never loses his keys because he has a driver to take care of that for him.

Who mows the lawn?

Lionel has mowed the lawn exactly once. Martha made a passing comment about the classic housewife looking at the hot young gardener or pool boy trope, and Lionel kept teasing her about it. Eventually, when the latest housekeepers were on vacation, he took the opportunity to make the joke a reality and Martha sat, sipping a cocktail and laughing as Lionel, in jeans, with a flannel tied around his waist and no shirt on mowed the lawn. She enjoyed herself and he was very happy about that but mowing the lawn was the most boring experience of his life. He didn’t think to bring headphones for music or radio, and the noise was too loud to hear himself think. He just kept looking over at Martha the whole time to stop himself going haywire with the repetitive work. Martha tipped him $20.

Who answers the telephone?

Lionel is constantly getting called, and constantly answering the phone. If its not Martha’s cell, its usually safe to assume that its for Lionel, as different people are trying to reach him at different places. Martha doesn’t really like talking on the phone, she likes talking to people in person and always gets nervous something is going to get miscommunicated over phone conversations.

Who takes the longest to shower?

Are you kidding me, that man needs a hell of a lot of time to apply every cream, shampoo, conditioner, and then aftershave that he has, in the correct order, for maximum aesthetic and image. He has a waterproof radio in there and Martha bought him a set of shower pens so he would stop running out every few seconds to write something down and then getting back in. His shower set up now looks like another office, if its a waterproof shower gadget, Lionel probably has it.

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem?

Nope. 

How many cars do they own?

Martha doesn’t know, and she doesn’t really want to know. She only needs one and if he even thinks about buying her another one she’s donating however much he’s going to spend to every charity within a fifty mile radius. Lionel has twelve. 

Do they own their home or do they rent?

They own their various places. Martha after having paid off the mortgage with Jonathan over about thirty years, Lionel just buys things when it strikes him. 

Do they live in the city or in the country? 

They move between places, because Smallville is Martha’s home base, and Lionel has a lot of history and investments in the town so they do still stay at the manor, and the farm, even though both of their jobs are based more in Metropolis, so they also spend quite a bit of time at Lionel’s apartment in the city. 

Do they enjoy their surroundings?

They’re both city kids at heart but Martha loves her home, and she feels protective and defensive about her town. 

What’s their song?

Not in-universe but: ‘Two less lonely people in the world’ (all Air Supply songs are Mionel songs, I don’t make the rules, don’t @ me)

Of course, if you actually asked them then, ’Salut d’amour’ Lionel would tell you, ‘La Fleur Que Tu M’avais Jetée’, he’d think to himself. Martha’s would be a lot less symbolic, it would be something that reminded her of a time with Lionel, something playing on the radio early on in their relationship, or song in a musical they went to see that Martha saw him enjoying and thought about how handsome he looked when smiling. 

What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Lionel pines something awful. He is insufferable to be around when Martha is out of town on business. Martha texts him all the time tho, because she likes to comment on things she sees and the people that she meets. When Lionel’s away on business he emails practically every hour, you’ve seen that man’s emails, always about five when one would do. Martha is better about the separation than Lionel, except at night. She really hates sleeping alone, whereas Lionel is really used to it so it doesn’t bother him as much. 

Where did they first meet?

So many years ago in the front of Jonathan Kent’s pick up truck. Nobody would have known it at the time, but they would both have one of the most profound impacts on the other’s life. 

How did they first meet?

In a high octane situation where both of them were worried about whether the boys in their arms would be okay.

Who spends the most money when out shopping?

Lionel has expensive taste. And he likes to buy expensive things. If there’s two versions of the same thing he wants to buy, but one is $1000 dollars more expensive, well, say hello to your new fancy toaster Mr Luthor, it has 8 toast slots and 100 settings and you’ll never use it but, by god, you own it.

Who’s more likely to flash their assets?

Is this a trick question? The man’s a compulsive show off. 

Who finds it amusing when the other trips over?

Martha. Not because she’s mean, or because she finds people hurting themselves funny. If he actually hurt himself she wouldn’t laugh. But like, it’s Lionel Luthor. He’s not supposed to trip, and if he does, he looks at the floor like its been plotting this very moment for months and he’s going to revenge himself upon it. Lets face it, that’s funny. 

Who pays the bills?

Much to Martha’s chagrin, she does have to concede that its kind of nice not to be worrying about how she’s gonna stretch the account month to month, but she doesn’t let him pay for everything, and gets very uncomfortable when he buys too expensive things. Lionel just gets frustrated that she won’t let him pay for more, he has all this money damn it, how else is supposed to show his love? Open and honest communication? Bah, unnacceptable. 

Do they have any fears for their future?

Yes, like, absolutely. They both know how quickly shit could go downhill if there isn’t someone (Clark) combatting the threats trying to take the city and town down all the time. 

Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?

Lionel, by a mile. He likes doing fancy rich people things, and he’s good at showing affection via buying shit, so this is kind of like a romantic and thoughtful version of saying I love you, with money. He just likes to see her happy and treated like a queen. He would buy her a goddamn throne to sit on if he ever thought she’d accept that. 

Who uses up all of the hot water? 

One of these people is rich and has been inconsiderate for a very long time, one has not. I’ll let you work it out. (For real tho, Lionel has a back up water heater for sure)

Who’s the tallest?

Okay well this isn’t a hc, more of just a fact that Lionel is taller and Martha is tiny and its adorable. 

Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?

Martha. Lionel, of course, has entered other people’s showers, but usually as he’s in the process of seducing (and probably having another illegitimate child with) them, so the first time she popped in the shower and actually started, you know, showering, he was caught off guard. Like, um, you- you know I’m in here right. He quickly understood the value of such intimacy, but he still does tend to get handsy. 

Who wanders around in their underwear?

Lbr, everyone at the Luthor mansion has seen more of Lionel than they ever should have. If he’s fixating on a thing sometimes he doesn’t get dressed before working on it, meaning that at particularly stressful times you could often walk into a room and see Lionel in just a robe and boxers (if you’re lucky), speaking orders into a phone. Of course, he wouldn’t be caught dead like that for an outsider to see, only family and staff (who all have some, probably illegal, non-disclosure agreements binding them), and he would demand to be notified immediately if the mansion was getting a visitor so he could put on a suit that costs more than their house. 

Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?

Martha, she’ll chuck on music as she’s working on stuff and have fun with it. Lionel doesn’t sing to the radio, but he does conduct an invisible orchestra when he’s listening to his records. 

What do they tease each other about?

Lionel teases her about her farm habits and vocab she’s picked up over the years, she teases him about how he doesn’t understand how regular people live. He teases her for how she never sees the plot twist coming in a tv show, and she teases him about how paranoid he got the time the waitress gave him his coffee and he seriously considered it might be poisoned because, and she quotes “Her smile was off, she smiled at me funny.” “Lionel stop looking at her. I can see you using your peripheral vision. Oh my god, put the cup down before they ask us to leave.”

Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?

Oh my god, Lionel has the widest fashion sense possible, any time Lionel is not dressed in a three piece suit and overcoat he is wearing something disastrous. Like, credit to the man that he found a look that both works for him and is socially appropriate in the workforce, but his non-thousand-dollar-suit fashion sense can be daggy as fuck. Like, have you seen that man not in suits? His comfortable clothes are terrible sweaters and bad pants (Pls don’t get me started on John Glover’s own terrible pants). If Lionel wasn’t oppressed by the world’s sense of what is appropriate fashion, he would be unstoppable. Flare trousers? Collars as high as they will go? Does it make me look like a dramatic fuck, check, then yes. 

Lionel is 0-100, he is either dressed to fucking destroy in suits that cost more than your house, or he looks like the middle class dopey dad from a bad 90s sitcom. And if Lionel wasn’t so concerned about how people perceive him and how his look affects other’s attitudes he would channel that instinct for thousand dollar clothes into something truly hideous and I would be living. 

Do they have mutual friends?

No, they come from a very different circle of friends. They also have very different experiences of “friends”. For one thing Martha’s friends aren’t usually considering a plot to kill her in the back of their minds when they see each other. 

Who crushed first? 

Lionel has been gone since the day he first set eyes on her, he just didn’t know it at the time.

Any alcohol or substance related problems?

Lionel drinks more than he should, and he’s done a lot of stuff during his life. He was a high flying businessman in the eighties so you do the math. He also smoked well into the nineties until he quit, not because of all the health PSAs, but because he didn’t like that his craving for a cigarette kept taking him away from work (also someone jokey said the tobacco controlled him once and that spun around in his head until he couldn’t take it). Lionel liked to do addictive things to prove to himself how strong he was when he kicked it, which was honestly playing with fire because he has a very obsessive personality but, fuck, you try and explain that logically to him. Good luck. 

LuthorCorp buildings also now have very draconian smoking rules, not because of health and safety or government requirements but because Lionel is petty and full of spite and he better not see you light up, and better not smell so much as a whiff of tobacco on you. He was presented with a conscientious business owner award from the Metropolis anti-smoking lobby which of course he accepted graciously with lots of platitudes about civic duty and moral compasses, and inwardly mocking every person applauding him. His picture hangs at their office which he enjoys immensely. 

Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?

That’s neither of their style really, they prefer to drink in the house rather than go anywhere. If anyone’s drunk at 3am its probably Lionel in the study with a half finished bottle of whiskey dictating his ideas for his novel into a tape recorder, or shouting the correct answers at the contestants on wheel of fortune. His novel ideas are incomprehensible, but his WoF answers are usually correct. Once he even rang into the station when the host gave a false answer and forced them to issue a correction. He had no recollection of this event the next morning. 

Who swears the most?

Lionel. I think Lionel went through a phase of being like, swearing is beneath me, it is only for those of a low and uncouth vocabulary, and I shan’t be one to use it. But then like, he just has too much anger and too much spite to be able to contain in polite words, and so I think he absolutely swears a lot to himself in private because shit goes wrong and he is not about that, but he still contained it when talking to people so they wouldn’t think he’d lost control. 

Martha had to curb any swearing in the house because she had a very fast, smart child with sensitive (if not super at that point) hearing who could pick up and parrot anything she said back at her. They never heard the end of it the day Jonathan broke his wrist fixing the barn roof and quite understandably swore black and blue. Clark ran around the house for days after, cussing up a storm and it took a concerted effort to get him to stop. 

[talesmaniac89]

The Costume Party

Summary: Dean x Reader - Dean and the reader go on a hunt at a costume party, where Dean has to deal with his jealousy as the guys can’t seem to keep their eyes off the reader.

Triggers: Jealousy

Word Count: 3671

Y/N = Your name ¦ Y/H/C = Your Hair Colour

---

“Remind me again… Why are we doing this?” You asked under your breath, tugging at your costume before reaching out and ringing the doorbell. Your eyes leaving the door to glance over at Dean. His cowboy hat slightly hid those gorgeous green eyes of his as he adjusted his holsters and smiled wryly.

 “It’s our job,” He said as he looked up, tipping the cowboy hat towards you with a crooked smile. The gesture making you roll your eyes as you looked from his cowboy costume and down at your own Poison Ivy choice. Damn it, all the damned leaves were tickling your bare arms and honestly you missed your comfy cotton t-shirt. But, it was a costume party. And to fit in you had to dress up. With a sigh you glanced up at the still closed door, waiting for someone in the house to notice the doorbell over the loud thumping music from inside.

 “Our unpaid, thankless job you mean?” You said, the sarcasm dripping from your painted lips akin to the poison that was the weapon of choice of your costume character. You loved what you did, you were a hunter - which meant you saved people. But, hell, normally you didn’t have to wear a green corset to do so. “Oh joy…”

 “Yeah…. That one,” Dean chuckled as the two of you shared a wry grin, just as the door opened to reveal a man dressed as a typical Hollywood-esque zombie. Shouting over the music to apologise for not hearing the bell as you twisted your smiles to instead just look happy and maybe slightly tipsy before you entered the door into the Halloween party.

 Someone within the house had messed with forces they shouldn’t have. All in the spirit of Halloween. Which might be why you had such a bleak view of the holiday. For some stupid reason there was always someone that thought that old creepy book with incantation would make for good party games or, like in this case, thought that old cursed object would be a perfect halloween decoration.

“Damn… What was it we’re looking for?” Dean asked, leaning close and speaking the words directly into your ear to be heard over the music. The close proximity of those full lips and the slightly woody, smoky scent of the hunter sending involuntary sparks of electricity through your body and into your heart. Of course, by the boyish grin was a clear indication of the hunter knowing exactly why you were there as you laughed along with him.

 There were masks, everywhere… People wearing them, on the walls, hell, even the decorations had masks on. And it just so happened… The damned cursed item was, you guessed it, a fucking mask.

 “I guess we’ll just have to go with the process of elimination,” You said, giving an overacted sigh as you looked around the room, accepting a bottle of beer from Dean as you kept glancing at the already drunk partygoers. The glass bottle was wet and cold in your hand from the already melting ice in the bucket Dean had swiped them from. “I’ll start… We can rule out the horse mask on the dude in the corner,” You added after a grateful smile and a quick sip of beer.

 “And the feathery purple mask on the girl on his lap… Unless the demonic masked cwarriors had a flair for the dramatic,” Dean supplied, teasing a small laugh from you as you continued your cursed mask version of where’s Wally whilst walking among the busy crowds at the party.

 Sure, it was a hunt, and both of you knew the importance of retrieving the mask. But, hell, it wasn’t as if the mask had killed anyone as of yet. It normally only did so after several days, and never when anyone but its owner was around. You might as well enjoy the little time alone you were getting with your crush in the midst of the loud Halloween crowd. No matter how hard enjoying yourself could be when the crowd around you only seemed to be getting louder and wilder with every new song.

 What was it that made people wearing costumes act so strangely? Was it because they got to pretend to be someone else for a while? Hell, if someone had decided to wear the mask and was acting strangely in some way, would you even know in the already drunk crowd?

 ---

 “I think we should split up, we’ll cover more ground that way,” You finally said with a sigh after a preliminary walk-through of the ground floor had yielded little result other than some drunk guy spilling some of his drink on your corset. Yet, no answer came from the older hunter, making you turn around to face him and figure out why he was so strangely quiet all of a sudden after having filled the whole evening with jokes and puns about costumes and masks.

 Turning, you caught him glaring in the direction of someone across the room. The sight of his set jaw and burning green irises enough to make every muscle in your body tense. That was the look of a hunter. Meaning, he’d found something. Turning your head in an effort to follow his line of sight you saw nothing out of the ordinary at first glance. Speaking up as you turned back to face him and looked away from the small group of guys gathered by the wall he had been glaring at.

 “Did you find it?” You asked, unable to hide your excitement at the prospect of leaving the party behind and finally being able to breath again once the costume and corset came off. But as Dean quickly tore his eyes off of whatever he had been glaring at he shook his head with a sigh.

 “No, no sign of it…” He said, his voice still thick with some unidentifiable emotion that sounded suspiciously like anger. “Sorry, did you say something?” The hunter added, his eyes remorseful for his momentary lapse into… Something… You still couldn’t identify the reason for his glare as you looked in the direction of the group that had held his attention before you spoke up.

 “Let’s split up. We’ll cover more ground, and once we find it, we can text each other to meet up,” You said, looking back up at the cowboy-clad hunter and repeating your original idea. Already pivoting to take a step in the direction of the kitchen as you expected nothing more than an easy yes from the hunter. After all, it wasn’t that dangerous of a situation. You could deal with the drunkards, and the mask was not a threat until someone was left alone with it.

 “No way (Y/N), it ain’t safe,” Dean grumbled, his words stopping you as you looked back at him, raising an eyebrow at the cowboy before making a point of looking around at the drunken masses. “I mean… We don’t know everything about the mask, better we stick together,” He added when he saw your confused look.

 You shrugged and started walking together with him through the rooms again. You honestly didn’t see the danger. Not when you could pretty much kick the ass of everyone in the room. But hell, you weren’t gonna complain when his suggestion let you walk side by side and share a laugh with the damned sexy hunter. The perks of the job and all.

 ---

 “Hey there, think I would survive a kiss?” The slurred words came after your second round around the house party. The clearly drunken man dressed as a gladiator took an uneven step towards you as he smiled at his own ‘genius’ pickup line. Clearly a reference to your costume. “I think we should give it a go… For s...psy… science,” He slurred as he stumbled close enough for you to smell the whole brewery off of him.

 As you wrinkled your nose in disgust, at both the excessively heavy smell of liquor as well as the awful lines you took a quick step backwards. Readying yourself to turn him down and send him packing. Yet, before you could tell him off, Dean had stepped between you and the drunk Don Juan, blocking him from your view with his broad back straight and tense.

 “Dean, it’s not worth it. And gladiator boy, thanks, but no thanks… Go sober off,” You shot out before the two of them would start comparing testosterone levels. Pulling at Dean’s arm, you sighed and rolled your eyes at the clear macho display in front of you as the gladiator and cowboy squared off. “What the hell Dean?” You added with a final tug on Dean’s arm to make him turn to face you again.

 “He was being an asshole,” Dean grumbled, the dark look in his eyes not fully having the time to disappear before they met with yours again. His glare softening quickly as he refocused his attention on you instead of the drunken man. “Sorry,” He added sheepishly as you set your eyes on him, giving your best impression of Sam’s bitch glare.

 “I could’ve handled him myself Winchester,” You said with a sigh, the worst of your annoyance fading when the hunter threw you a boyish grin.

 “I know… You kick ass. Sorry, I guess the case has me acting a bit tense,” Dean said, finally returning to his bright self, though you could tell that he was still wound somewhat tightly. Like he was ready to spring into action at a moment's notice. “Let’s look in the next room,” He added with a quick glance thrown over his shoulder where the gladiator was leaning against the nearby wall, still looking in you direction.

 Placing his hand on the small of your back, Dean led the way towards the door and another crowd of party guests, as if he was whisking you away from the spartan. You wanted to stay annoyed, or at least once more push your “I am woman, hear me roar and fucking demolish everything” thoughts, but the proximity of the hunter made that hard.

 The heat of his hand on the small of your back thawed the butterflies in your stomach, bringing them back to life as your heart thumped along to the heavy bass of the stereo system. Having Dean Winchester that close was like wrapping your mind in cotton. Only the sound of his voice, the feel of his skin on yours and the waves of safety blanketing you seemed able to break through the chaotic mess in your head.

 Over the years you had started falling for him, harder and harder. These hunts that only included the two of you were always the hardest. Usually when Sammy was there, it was easier to keep things platonic. But when it was the two of you… Damn it… You couldn’t even stay annoyed at the adorable bastard. Not when you knew, deep down, that he was only looking out for you in his own clumsy way.

 Dean Winchester always felt he had to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. And that included keeping the few people he let in close to his heart safe. Even from perceived dangers. He knew very well that Sam, Cas and you could protect yourself. Yet he always tried being your shield. Never letting you step in front to protect him instead.

 Sure, he might be wearing a cowboy costume, but to you Dean always seemed to try to act like a superhero. A knight in jeans and flannel. Giving up everything for those around him. His heart too big to let others carry any of his pain in fear of hurting them. And you loved him for it, albeit silently, though he could sometimes annoy the hell out of you.

 Like right that second, you noted. As you watched Dean’s whole body tense up again. His eyes hardening and jaw locked as he wrapped his arm fully around your waist before speaking up over the music towards the man you hadn’t even seen reaching out for you. Damn it, so much for hunting reflexes. Dean’s arm around you had you on cloud nine to such an extent that even a civilian could sneak up on you. The kid seemed to be a few years younger than you and clearly had decided to go the killer clown route in his costume choices and he wasn’t the first one of the night. It was probably a good thing Sammy hadn’t come along.

 “She ain’t interested,” Dean barked, before the guy could even speak up. The drunk guy’s eyes widening as they left your corseted cleavage to look at Dean’s arm around your waist instead. His hands shooting up in a sign of surrender as he stepped quickly back, nearly falling over in his two sizes too large clown shoes.

 “Sorry dude, didn’t know” The clown said, his words apologetic, though you honestly didn’t need to hide behind Dean to put a kid in a clown costume back in place.  

Raising an eyebrow at the annoyed, yet clearly over-protective tone in Dean’s voice you tried to catch his eye from where he was still busy glaring at the clown. Damn, you’d think the drunk civilian was a Rakshasa instead of just a party boy with the added social lubrication of a few drinks too many from the way Dean was looking at him.

 Sighing you tugged at Dean’s arm, unwrapping it from your waist before using your hold on his wrist to force the hunter to follow you over to a relatively more quiet part of the party. Keeping silent on your full walk over until you finally pivoted on your heel to turn to face him, letting your (Y/H/C) hair whip around with you for added dramatic effect.

 “What’s your problem Winchester?” You said, your voice more tired and annoyed than actually angry as you let go of his wrist to fold your arms across your waist. “You know I can handle myself,”

 “I don’t have a problem, they do,” Dean said his voice still deep with some unidentifiable emotion as his green eyes burned like a forest fire. Unlike last time, Dean seemed unable to quickly let go of his annoyance with the drunk man. His words coming out rushed as he continued speaking before you could ask him to clarify. “They think they’re good enough for you. They won’t ever be…”

 The hunter caught himself a moment too late. The words were already out as his sentence died down and his eyes widened in shock at what he had just said. If you didn’t know better, it would have sounded to you as if the hunter was jealous. But… That couldn’t be true. Could it?

 “Dean… What’s up? You’re not making much sense,” You said, trying to urge the hunter to continue as he cleared his throat, the fight finally leaving him completely.

 “Nothing… I mean, I just think you deserve more than some drunk guy hitting at you at a party,” Dean mumbled, his words barely eligible through the chaotic mess of people talking and the loud music of the party. Still, you caught them clearly. “I’m just sayin’... You deserve a good man, one that can make you happy. Not like them, and not a hunter either. Someone real, good, and safe,” He continued, clearly noticing your incredulous look as he kept digging the hole deeper for himself.

 Though you found his protective nature endearing at most times, you couldn’t help the annoyance you felt bubbling to the surface. Sure, it wasn’t his fault. He cared for you, as a friend, and he didn’t know how much it hurt to hear him say you deserved someone who wasn’t him. Not when he was all you could think about.

 “I deserve to be happy!” Unable to stop yourself you felt your hands curl into fists as you spat out the words. The words seemed to leave you on their own, leaving you powerless to stop them as annoyance turned into a pained anger at his words. “I know I have to give up on you, but that doesn’t mean I don’t wanna be happy!”

 “Wha…” Dean’s stunned silent look and the breathless half-question that left him, was enough to make you catch what you’d just said. Your anger-fueled words had basically been a confession of your feelings for the hunter. A shitty confession, but a confession nonetheless… And after you’d managed to keep them hidden for years, misguided protective feelings would be the end of you. Typical.

 “Shit…” You groaned, trying to figure out how to explain away your words. To at least keep the hunter as a friend. You knew Dean, you knew how hard things hit him. The guilt for breaking your heart would surely weigh him down and destroy your easy friendship. That fear had kept you quiet for years. What the hell was in the beers at this party? Some kind of fucking truth serum?

 “What did you just say?” Dean’s voice was low, but in your panic of trying to find a way to suck the words back in the rest of the world had gone static and quiet. Only your own frantic mind and Dean’s words could break through as you looked for the right words to say. Opening and closing your mouth before deciding to take the cowardly way out and just push it all back down. The hunter’s choice. Don’t deal with the emotions, just push ‘em back down and bury ‘em under enough bodies to make everyone forget you even had a heart.

 “Look, just forget it. Let’s find that damned mask,” You said with a sigh as you turned to run away from the conversation you honestly didn’t think you could ever have. Not without your heart suffering the consequences. And hell, even if you had to have it. You definitely didn’t want to have it at a drunken house party surrounded by people dressed in costumes who were busy taking part in some seasonal mating dance. With a cursed mask on the premises as the cherry on top.

“No, I’m not gonna forget it and that mask ain’t going anywhere,” Dean said, his voice taking on a nearly panicked tone as he reached out and stopped you from running away from your own mess. “What did you say (Y/N)?”

 “Dean…” You hesitated, unwilling to look up at him as you instead focused on his cowboy boots. Your mouth dry and throat burning as you tried to figure out what you should say. Should you come clean? Tell him you’d loved him for years. How standing shoulder to shoulder with him through several apocalypses, as a hunter had made you fall harder for him than you ever thought possible? What would happen then? Would you have to leave the bunker?

 “Please, please tell me I didn’t hear you wrong,” Dean’s voice nearly broke over the words when you didn’t speak up. The pleading, nearly sorrowful tone to his voice making you finally look back up where green eyes were watching you carefully. A small hopeful light brightening them, though you could see that hope wavering more for every second you kept quiet. ”Look, (Y/N), I admit it… I’ve been a jealous bastard all night. It’s just… You look so gorgeous, and I mean… I’ve loved you for years. And I’ve never worked up the courage to say anything. Yet these guys think they can just…” Dean was rambling. You knew it, he knew it… And as his voice finally died down with a sigh you couldn’t help yourself. Smiling at the adorable dork of a hunter in front of you.

 “Took you long enough Winchester,” You said with a laugh, reaching up before the last hope in his eyes was extinguished and pulling at the lapels of his black shift as you lifted yourself up to give the man a soft kiss in lieu of an answer. “You didn’t hear me wrong,” You mumbled against his lips, your own smile brightening as you felt Dean’s full lips spread into a happy smile before his arms wrapped around you and deepened your kiss with a hungry need.

“Should’ve dressed as batman,” Dean mumbled once you parted to breathe as his arms still held you close. Though his tone was light and joking you could feel his heavy heartbeat matching yours and the small quiver of nervous elation in his voice. “Then we would’ve matched,”

 “Nah… I like the cowboy costume,” You laughed, giving him a quick peck on the lips before making a show of pulling slightly away from him to give him an appreciative once over. Damn, the man really could pull off the cowboy look. “You look good,”

 “Yeah?” Dean gave you a boyish grin and tipped his hat. The last of the slight worry and pain in his eyes gone after your whispered confessions to each other during your desperate kisses. Finally the hunter was back to the man you loved, his green eyes warm and bright like a summer’s day as he lifted his eyebrows in a show of hiding his own bashfulness.

 “Yeah, y’know what they say…” You said, letting your words die out with a teasing grin as you waited for the hunter to take the bait. Which he oh so willingly did.

 “What?” He asked, once more pulling you closer, as if he couldn’t bear to be away from you anymore.

 “Save a horse… Ride a cowboy,” You said, holding back your own laugh until Dean’s surprised half cough, half laugh pulled you along with it as it vibrated from his chest and into your body.

 “That can be arranged,” He chuckled, lifting your head by your chin before cutting short your bubbling laughter with another mind-numbingly soft kiss.

 Sure, it was a thankless, unpaid job… But it sure as hell had it’s benefits.

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