#Soooooo sick I don't have the energy for it

[kakusu-shipping]

1, 2, 4, 11, and 18 for the end of year asks? :0

Aaah thankyou Echo!!! This post might be long, please forgive me!

1. Did you add any F/Os to your list this year? Were they from new media or just a newly discovered love?

Here's every romantic F/O added to the list this year, or at least that I can remember adding this year. Years are long and my sense of time is very warped so it may not be fully accurate.

Most are from new media, or just new parts of media, like the end of the Owl House and the New Pokemon Games. The ones that are new loves from re-visits are Heracross, Smeargle, and Keckleon from Monster Mind, Mario and Luigi from Super Mario, Makarov from Fairy Tail, and Jill from The Wayward Children series.

Though Mario and Luigi are also what I consider my first F/Os, they weren't officially on the list until the movie came out, so I'm counting them in the 2023 yearly wrap.

2. Did you reconsume any of your F/Os’ source media this year? How did you feel about the rewatch/listen/read/etc?

I rewatch Assassination Classroom every year in March and it makes me cry every time. I also replay Hatoful Boyfriend and Holiday Star every December for Kazuaki and Hitori, watch Baka and Test sometime around late Summer most years to ease my seasonal depression, and rewatch Mushishi at least once a year.

Other than that, nothing super meaningful. I rewatched a few LPs of Mario games, replayed through Paper Mario myself, watched Romantic Killer again, Reread Manly Appetites every other month or so, watched The Cat Returns once or twice, played more Pokemon, Restarted Monster Mind (still haven't finished it), and skimmed the Ouran Manga at the library while waiting for them to replace the volume they're missing.

HOWever, this latest reread of Down Among the Sticks and Bones is what got me to finally put Jill on the F/O list, so that feels worth mentioning. I love that book <3

4. Was there anything on your blog that you were particularly proud of this year?

No, not really. My drawings were all very incomplete and sketchy this year with long gaps between them, and my writing really flaked off suddenly, I haven't written more than a paragraph at all this year.

I wouldn't say I'm particularly proud of them, but I did really enjoy making moodboards last month and am kind of waiting for my health to settle so I can get back to them. Making stuff for other self shippers is a lot more fun than writing/drawing for myself atm.

11. Was there new media for any of your F/Os this year? If so, what was your opinion on it?

Yes FNaF Help Wanted 2 came out and gave us New Sun Content and I LOVED IT!!!!! He's such a bitch!!!! A shit!!! A snobby theater kid!!! He's so controlling and harsh I LOVE him <3 So happy to know more about him honestly and that he's not all UwU Caregiver that the fandom made him. I like soft characters, but he's a HORROR character he needs to be a little fucked up!!

18. Did you have a favorite trend in the selfship community from the past year?

I'll be honest, I don't pay much attention to what other people in the selfship community are doing. I follow the tags but if there's like a popular trend thing going around, I miss it every time.

My LEAST favorite right now though is the whole "Stolen from an Anti" thing. I have no qualms about stealing posts it's whatever, but I hate when it's says that in text at the bottom of the post. Just tag it as such so I can filter it please

[silverzoomies]

Angels

peter maximoff x reader

warnings: peter being a goober, he watches porn for like half a second, it's highkey a stranger things crossover, my dialogue is goofy as hell

word count: 5,240

a/n: had a lot of fun with this one !! a while back, my buddy @quickandsilvers (now deactivated, and i can't find their new acc) requested a fic where he works in a video store and makes a fool of himself. i think i strayed from their prompt a lot, but i hope they don't mind. sorry about the stranger things crossover !! it happened naturally while writing it, and i couldn't stop thinking about steve and peter interacting. lol

Like a responsible adult, Peter spent the span of an entire month “studying” for his GED final. His rapid fire attention span made focusing a tough feat, even past his years of high school age hyperactivity. Which was the very reason he had to study so friggin hard for his GED in the first place. Peter never graduated high school. And because he never graduated high school, he didn’t really know what real studying was. “Studying” for him mostly entailed speed reading, once or twice over. Before he called it quits and bolted away to do…Peter stuff.

He was honestly really proud of himself for sticking it out, though. Much to his mother’s most pleasant surprise. Peter carried a perfect attendance streak through all his classes. A wildly stark contrast to his self proclaimed, unmatched ditch streak back in high school. In hindsight, that wasn’t something worth boasting about.

But all his hard work and bonafide effort proved supremely disappointing…when he flunked the final anyway.

Peter’s chest ached, as though someone tore his heart out, stomped on it, then double tapped for good measure. In a fit of unbridled frustration, Peter raced across the entire planet to burn out his rage. His blood boiled hot in his veins. After circling the globe about a gajillion times, he finally skidded to a stop. Somewhere in Indiana.

His clothes were all tattered and covered in holes. Burned from supersonic force. The soles of his favorite shoes turned to ash, crying smoke like a bonfire. Painful blisters littered his feet. But in his defeated haze, he couldn’t find the energy to care. Barefoot and blistered, Peter walked to the nearest payphone, his head tipped back in shame.

He could only imagine how devastated his mom would be.

It broke Peter’s heart, knowing he’d have to call her and ruin her day. After she promised to take him and his sisters out for a celebratory dinner. All you can eat Chinese! - she said. Being on the receiving end of bad news was one thing. But delivering said news to one’s mother - after an entire lifetime spent letting her down? That sucked unimaginably more.

At the payphone - after tossing his desecrated shoes in the trash - Peter hesitantly brought the handset to his ear. Deep breath in. Now, breathe out. He leaned against the glass of the phone booth. Over the line, his mother’s voice lost all liveliness. And a moment later, Wanda took over instead, sounding majorly peeved off. She threw all kinds of accusations at him - Did you even try, Piet? I thought you were taking this seriously! You said you studied! You totally dashed mom’s hopes!

Peter rolled his finger through one of the holes in his Queen shirt. Mannnn. Friggin sucks. He got that one from the totally sick Hot Space Tour. He even took Wanda with him, and they had the most righteous time. With her so disappointed on the phone like this, it hurt to recall any fond memories. Peter pinched the bridge of his nose. He tried cracking a half-assed joke to lighten the mood.

“Soooooo…no Chinese tonight then?”

Yeah, nah. Sis didn’t take to that one too well. Peter hated arguing with her, but the two spat back and forth for about five minutes. Peter bumped his head against the glass as his stress ran up to mach ten. Gathering whatever patience he had left - a microscopic amount, at this point - he apologized, told his sister he loved her, and hung up. Once he stepped outside of the phone booth, he heaved a long groan.

Peter’s fingers twitched at his sides. Taking a quick glance upward, he noticed a nearby video store. A Family Video, nestled in a strip mall next to an arcade. Narrowing his eyes, Peter chewed his lip in contemplation.

And he made a supremely stupid move.

A millenia passed since Peter gave into his klepto compulsions. Maybe old habits die hard, as they say.

At the Hawkins PD, the chief lingered nearby in a rickety, metal chair, a cigarette dangling from his lips. The night seemed to drag for eons, as Peter paced barefoot in restless circles…within the confines of a lonesome jail cell. Since Hawkins was such a small town, hardly any of the feds were familiar with the X-Men. Mutants were a rare commodity. They sooner thought Peter was a hobo the chief picked up off the street.

Come next morning, Peter got an earful from Chuck. Thankfully, the generous prof forgave Peter for his colossal fuck-ups. He even paid Peter’s bail. And while the speedster felt even more sick with guilt because of it; he was grateful he wouldn’t have to spend another second in nowhere town Indiana.

Tormentous boredom aside; for some reason, the place gave Peter the creeps.

Falling victim to his own compulsions proved a major setback on all fronts. After Chuck chewed Peter out over the phone, he broke even more bad news. Apparently, the Family Video manager made a major stink about Peter’s thievery. Even called in a complaint to Xavier’s school. The guy went so far as to blame mutants for their “dishonesty.” A completely baseless generalization. All because of some dumb knucklehead’s reckless behavior.

Chuck convinced the asshole to let Peter off the hook. Only if the speedster made up for it by working a summer’s job at Family Video. A short-term punishment. At least until Autumn, when Peter got another shot at his GED. The professor basically grounded Peter from X-Men stuff. Awesome. Heck, technically, he grounded him from the mansion altogether. Cool beans. Thumbs up. Hunky dory.

Hell no. Peter was an adult. Not a teenager who needed to be disciplined after disobeying papa’s orders. He didn’t even really have a papa. In fact, papa disappeared off the face of the planet just a few years back.

Peter digressed. Whatever, right? Grown men messed up all the time. So what if he made a few minor missteps on the road to personal development?

And he would’ve argued these points, had something in Chuck’s honest voice not guilted him into silence.

Hopefully, he wouldn’t have to wear a stupid vest or anything.

The sweltering hot month of June.

Quicksilver should be out kicking ass, causing trouble, stealing hearts (playing video games, tampering with tech, being a total nerd).

Instead, he found himself leaning on the counter of a Family Video register in Indiana.

Peter had never worked an everyman’s retail job in his life. And holy smokes, was it slow. The days ran slower than a sloth in cement shoes. At any given moment, Peter swore he was nanoseconds away from dying of boredom. Literally. Call him melodramatic, but the monotony of day-to-day living sucked the speedy soul out of him. Only a few weeks passed since he “joined the Family Video team.” But all he ever did was idle behind the counter like a chud, gorging on snacks and watching MTV.

Whenever the news reported another X-Men victory, achieved without the help of the team’s one and only speedster; Peter felt the urge to run around the globe again. All he wanted was to shake off his temperament until his legs gave out. But alas. His feet stayed planted on freshly mopped linoleum, in the confines of VHS rental hell.

On the flip side, at least his new shoes were still intact.

Peter spent his days doing mind-numbing activities like reorganizing shelves, sorting movies by genre, and mopping floors. Playing with the label maker was kinda fun. Totally not even a little boring. Nope. Peter never daydreamed some psycho might rob the place, just so he’d have an excuse to be Quicksilver again.

Why would he? When he could play with that sweet label maker.

Yawn.

Thankfully, he wasn’t completely alone. Not that he minded much either way. Solitude and Peter went together like Han Solo and Chewy. But another guy worked the same shift as Peter. Some dude named Steve, with great hair and a metric fuckton of pins all over his vest. He swore up and down, his friend Robin insisted he cover himself head to toe in them. Because something something “chicks totally dig a guy with accessories.”

Peter never met Robin, since her hours were all jacked up. But judging by the Rainbow Brite, Care Bear, and Garbage Pail Kids pins all over Steve’s vest; Peter knew she had to be pulling her pal’s leg.

Which…alright. Cool. He could respect that.

Steve was a decent enough guy and super chill to talk to. He got along great with the group of hellions who always came in, looking for nerdy flicks like Clash of the Titans. Peter once spent a whole afternoon debating Star Wars logistics with them; arguing whether or not Ewoks had any justifiable place in Return of the Jedi. But, come on, those fuzzballs were kinda cool.

And Peter refused to admit he had a few Ewok figures in his collection back in Westchester.

Neither Steve, nor his munchkins seemed to have any qualms about mutants. The only thing he ever bitched about was Peter’s effortless ability to stay in tip-top shape.

“It’s so bullshit, man.” He blatantly complained, “You can pig out on Twinkies all day and still look like that. What does your metabolism run on? Jet fuel?”

Peter’s beady eyes darted swiftly back and forth, across the pages of Lord of the Rings. One of Steve’s little minions gave the speedster a used copy. Worn at the edges. Barely held together by the spine. Peter hadn’t read a real book by choice since middle school. As he skimmed through it at a remarkable pace, he spoke through a creamy bite of Twinkie.

“Flux Capacitor.”

Shame. Sucks for Steve. The dude was obviously good looking. But he somehow fumbled his attempts at flirting with cute chicks. Not to mention, his opportunities came so few and far in between, with Peter there to steal the show. And while some small-town ladies had a tendency to scrunch their noses and sneer at the presence of a mutant - others recognized him as a hero. One of the X-Men. On the rare chance a cutie walked in with her besties following along; they sometimes whispered amongst each other.

"Isn’t he with the X-Men?” “Oh my god, he is!” “Which one is he?” “I think he’s the fast one.” “How fast is he though?” “Oh, he’s, like, so mega fast. Like a speeding bullet on legs.” “Whoa. He’s kinda cute.” “What do you think his calves look like?” “I like his hair.” “What’s he doing here in Hawkins?” “Do you think he’s undercover?” “He looks so ripped.”

Chewing his gum and secretly listening in, Peter cheesed a grin from ear to ear like a doofus. And he soon fell into a shameless habit, letting awestruck girls cop a feel of real, superhero muscles and speedster calves. Hard as vibranium, vascular like Commodore 64 wiring.

What?? Give him a break! Back in Westchester, girls never gave him a second glance.

The endless quiet and steady pace of everyday living drove Peter up a freaking wall after a while. A month in, he felt himself going stir crazy. Peter continuously thought about zipping out for a quick run. One whole second tops. Just to make a break for a slushie at the gas station down the street. Steve even swore he wouldn’t rat Peter out if he bailed and came back. Cuz, like, seriously…who would notice?

But in the back of his mind somewhere, Peter heard Chuck’s voice. A guilty reminder to slow his roll. Stop and smell the roses. The speedster had his impulses, sure. But he wasn’t so weak willed. Peter knew, deep in his heart, he could do better. Hell, he was better. A true master of self control. No problem-o.

Except…he totally wasn’t.

Hand to god, Peter was, and would always be a colossal jackass.

He affirmed this brutally honest fact with himself the first time he met you.

That night, the store seemed like a barren ghost town. Not a customer in sight. Most of the town’s locals were out having fun at a traveling carnival. Steve even took the day off to chaperone his hobbit posse. He stopped by just to give Peter his pin-covered vest, and left his esteemed colleague to stew in his own boredom. Wasting away behind the counter, restless as ever; Peter dreamed of carnival funnel cake.

And why not sneak away for a quick sec? Just to grab himself something sweet. He liked to think he earned it.

Peter zipped to the carnival, paid for some funnel cake, tied Steve’s shoelaces together, and returned to the store in a flash. Leaning comfortably back on a metal stool; he stuffed his gullet with fried delights. Sweet, doughy goodness. Powdered sugar coated his fingers and dusted the corners of his mouth. Peter kept his legs hiked up, dirty sneakers crossed on the countertop. Whatevs. He’d wipe ‘em down before he closed up shop in two hours.

His lidded eyes gaped lazily at one of theTVs hanging from the ceiling. Peter shamelessly watched a wildly inappropriate porno. A filthy flick he snatched from the restricted section and popped in. Partly out of boredom. Mostly out of morbid curiosity. Angels of Passion. Peter sat through an hour of hilariously raunchy scenes - all featuring steamy, angel hanky panky. Talk about divine intervention. He snickered to himself as heat pooled in his cheeks.

A blonde bombshell gyrated her hips in some dude’s lap, rolling her bush, bouncing to the beat of a catchy, unidentifiable song. Her explicit moans echoed lewdly over that earworm of a tune. Jesus, she was really going for it. Looked like she, uh…liked it, actually. Blood in Peter’s cheeks rushed south at warp speed. He felt a familiar tightening in his groin. With funnel cake crammed between his powdery lips, he adjusted himself in his jeans. Smearing powdered sugar carelessly over his crotch.

And he nearly choked to death when a voice he didn’t recognize called his name.

“Wow. Quicksilver? Is that you? Whatcha watchin?”

Oh. Oh, it wasn’t just his name name. But his hero name. Peter whipped his head around, his dark eyes widening as he met yours. Brows raised. Gazing humorously at him as though he were a bozo. Just his luck. A random customer - a very cute customer - picked the most optimal time to walk in. And there he was, the X-Men’s famous speedster; covered in powdered sugar, cheeks puffed like a chipmunk, Care Bear and Rainbow Brite pins all over his vest, a stiffy in his jeans, a nasty porno playing in the background.

What a huge lamebrain, you probably thought.

Peter blinked, and so did you. Time seemed to stretch in a long, awkward moment. Someone should honestly just shoot him and be done with it. From his perspective, an hour passed before he got his shit together. But from your perspective, he was there in a second. Leaning casually over the counter on his elbow, his other hand on his hip. The TV blared reruns of MTV music videos, with Madonna singin’ loud. The very same TV you caught him watching dirty movies on - just for the hell of it. Purely for entertainment’s sake, mind you.

And bizarrely enough, your expression held no judgment.

Furrowing his mercury brows, Peter wiped the last trace of powdered sugar from his lips. He cleared his throat and gave you a careless nod of his head. Stay cool. Stay collected. It wasn’t like his mom caught him with his pants down or something. He put on his best customer service smile. A grin so fake, his dimples vanished into hiding. Time to get the ball rolling before he lost whatever dignity he had left.

Peter hated Indiana. Like, really hated it.

He spoke fast, the words tumbling past his lips at the speed of light.

“That?Thatwasnothing.” Peter blurted out, his mouth running a hundred miles an hour. His fingers tapped anxiously on the countertop. Your curious gaze flicked down to them, before looking into his coke-brown eyes again. His face erupted in flames as he kept rambling, punctuating each sentence with an uneasy laugh, “I wasn’t watching anything. Just some lame religious documentary. Y’know. A real snore fest. I swear, I was this close to takin’ a nap.”

You laughed.

No lie, he wasn’t expecting you to laugh like that. The sound sliced through the tension in the air, catching him off guard. Peter’s breath caught in his throat. He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing. His forced smile curled up involuntarily, revealing his dimples for real this time.

“Yeah? Huh. For some lame documentary, you looked pretty into it. I’m surprised you heard me at all.”

“Eh, you’re not wrong. Puts a whole new meaning to goin’ heels to Jesus, doesn’t it?”

You let out another laugh, and your voice cracked. Blush creeped over your face from the neck up. A surge of shyness overtook Peter. Running a hand up through his hair, he searched for any words to say. And then he remembered he had a job to do.

“Anyway. Sorry. Can I help you with something?” Peter smoothed out his (Steve’s) vest, brushing powdered sugar from it like pesky snow.

“No biggie, dude. Just wondering where your horror section is.”

Peter arched his brow, “Horror, huh?”

With a cheeky smirk, he disappeared, leaving a swift gust of wind in his wake. You gasped a small peep. Pressing your hands to the counter, you leaned forward as though you were looking for him. He took the opportunity to admire your ass from where he stood between the aisles. Politely, of course.

“They’re over here.” The speedster called from his spot, keeping himself nonchalantly propped against a stand of horror mags. Your gaze flitted down to the Walkman hanging at his hip. His easy going stance made you laugh yet again - man, you made him feel like the king of comedy. You made your way to the horror section. Peter kept his eyes on you while you glanced over the tapes, “You lookin’ for anything in particular, orrrrr…”

“Nope, just looking.”

“Just looking. Got it.” Peter clicked his tongue, nodding, “Cool. Well, if you need any recs…I mean, I’m kind of a movie aficionado, so…”

“Oh, you are, are you?”

Aw, you actually humored him.

“Pfffbbt. Yeah. My twin sis is, like, super into sitcoms and stuff. But I’m the movie guy of the family.”

“And what kinda movies do you like?”

Peter didn’t miss a beat, “Star Wars, definitely. But I like Bladerunner too. ET. Robocop. Alien. Oh! Rocky’s awesome too. Scarface. I can do a crazy good Tony Montana impression. Clint Eastwood movies are cool. Conan the Barbarian. Can’t get enough of Arnold. And I’m not sayin’ Flash Gordon’s my favorite, but-”

You gaped at Peter like you saw him get hit by a car or something. He stopped himself short, pausing as he named off movies on his fingers.

“What? Not a fan?”

“Not a fan of wh-”

“Flash Gordon?”

“Is that what you said? I didn’t understand a single word of that, dude!”

Oh. Guess he got a little too amped up. The apples of Peter’s cheeks turned pink. Scratching the back of his neck, he sheepishly laughed.

“Sorry, uh…lemme start over…I like Star Wars.”

“So do I! I love Star Wa-”

Peter raised his head, fixing you with a squinty eyed, analytical look - mostly playful. He quickly cut you off again.

“What about Ewoks?”

“They’re like little teddy bears! What’s not to love?”

Points for you, cute, mystery babe.

“Oh, bitchin’. Yeah, uh-”

And like a huge doofus, Peter leaned a little too hard against the magazine stand. It tumbled to the floor as he knocked it over unintentionally. Catching himself, he flashed his teeth in a humiliated smile.

“Uh…I totally meant for that to happen.” He clarified.

Even though you laughed yet again - and sounded so, unfairly cute too - Peter vanished to the restroom to smack himself in the face a few times. Returning only to clean up the fallen magazines. Another microsecond later, he appeared behind the counter. At the register again. His summer hellscape. Purgatory.

And for now, after making such an ass of himself, he’d leave you be. Let you come to him.

You eventually did.

“Just these.” You muttered bashfully, sliding a few tapes across the counter.

Peter glanced up to look at you every few beats. Tapping away at the keypad, his agile fingers danced across the keys with finesse. And despite the speed at which he normally worked, there was an unmistakable lag in his movements. Almost deliberate. He took special care as he typed your information and logged your rentals. It was as if he prolonged the interaction on purpose, drawing out everything at a leisurely pace.

Very unlike Quicksilver.

You eyed the pins all over his (Steve's) vest.

"Nice pins." You said.

"Thanks. Care Bears are the shit."

You held back another giggle, covering your mouth to conceal it.

“Say, uhm…forgive me if I’m being too nosy. But what are you doing all the way out here in Indiana, Quicksil-” You paused, tilting your head innocently to the side. Your eyes squinted into thin slits as you read his nametag, “Peeeter? Peter, yeah.”

Peter flashed a lazy, cat-like grin, snapping his fingers and throwing a finger gun your way.

“Bingo, you got it. But, yeah, everyone else calls me Quicksilver. Except for the oldies who have no clue who I am. It’s insane being recognized sometimes. Cuz I’m just a glorified track-and-field star who ended up a wage monkey, I guess. The job sucks ass, honestly.” He chuckled, leaning against the counter, resting his weight on an elbow, “As for what I’m doin’ here? It’s top secret X-Men business.”

“Ooooh! What, like…some kinda covert op-”

“Covert operation? Yeeeeeaaaaaahhh…nah, I’m totally messin’. Let’s just say I got into some trouble and this is my punishment.” Peter chuckled softly, glancing at the films you picked out. His eyes widened as he scanned the titles, letting out a low whistle, “H’oooh. Some pretty gritty stuff here. These are brutal. Blood, guts, limbs flyin’ all over the place. You tryin’ to give yourself nightmares?”

“Eh, it’s all fake anyway. Just cheesy, dumb fun.” You giggled, taking the horror flicks from him. A jolt of electricity shot through him as your fingers brushed his own. The contact was brief, but it left a flutter in his stomach he couldn’t shake. Parting your pretty lips, you teased, “They’re way more interesting than any lame, religious documentaries.”

Peter raised a brow and gave you a bemused look, your playful comment catching him by surprise. He crossed his strong arms, restlessly tapping his finger against his bicep.

“Mhm. But that “documentary” had some pretty hot angels, not gonna lie.” He joked. Peter smirked, his eyes flickering up and down, giving you a quick once-over. He snapped his fingers again, keeping his tone casual, “Hey, speaking of, are you gonna be wingin’ it back to the pearly gates anytime soon? Or are you stickin’ around for a while?”

Aha! So, you weren’t immune to his natural charm. Your eyes shot open, your blush sending a righteous wave of satisfaction buzzing through him. Peter pressed his tongue to the inside of his cheek and wiggled his brows. His confidence soared beyond the stars. Shrugging off any remnants of awkwardness, he eased himself back into a state of carelessness. You broke into another cute giggle fit.

You scratched the back of your neck, looking bashfully down at your shoes.

“Nice save. I think that one actually made me blush.”

Peter blinked laxly, drawing out a satisfied hum. 

“Oh, yeah, it did for sure. Looks cute on you. What can I say? I aim to please.”

A warm smile graced his face as he slid you the last tape.

“Flash Gordon?” He asked.

If you blushed any more, you’d probably explode.

“I couldn’t keep up with the way you were talking…but you mentioned that one. You said it was one of your favorites, right?”

Peter’s heart skipped a beat.

The banter between the two of you seemed to flow so naturally. Time lost all meaning. And as the minutes passed and you said your goodbyes, moving towards the doors; Peter’s foot tapped at a frenzied pace. A powerful urge to chase after you swarmed him like a pack of angry bees. He knew he wouldn’t be staying in Indiana for much longer. Only a month more, at the most. But, man…there was something about you.

Ah, screw it. Act now, face the consequences later.

A fwip, and Peter materialized before you at the doors. You stumbled back and erupted in another surprised squeal. His hands instinctively reached out, grabbing your shoulders to steady you before you fell.

“Sorry! Sorry. Uh, any chance you’d wanna stick around for a while longer? It’s just so dead here tonight. We could kick it back, chill, and hang. And fingers crossed, I promise I won’t make you watch any weird, religious docs or nothin’.”

Miraculously, you agreed. Peter couldn’t believe his luck. And he spent the remaining few minutes of his shift, along with the rest of that night, hanging out with some cutie he met on a whim.

Maybe Robin was right. It was the vest, wasn't it? Chicks were totally into guys with accessories.

The impossibly hotter month of July.

Some might call Peter a little irresponsible. And true to form, he was. But you were legit the most fun thing to happen to him in months. Up there with the bitchin’ funnel cake he swiped from the carnival, the same night he met you. He hadn’t stopped thinking about it since. Both you, and the funnel cake.

Carpe diem or whatever.

In the cramped shadows of a video store supply closet, Peter pulled you oh-so-close against his body. Hot as hellfire. His heartbeat ran on bubbly fumes of anticipation. Peter’s chapped lips confidently claimed yours, a moment after you gave him a bashful peck and confessed the cutest thing ever-

“Pleaaaase don’t go back to Westchester!! I really really like you. I think you totally rock. I’m gonna miss you too much if you leave.”

D’awww. You were all soft on him. Your pouty lips and innocent eyes made his chest warm and tingly. Peter never imagined someone could win him over so easily. But after the front doors chimed, and you walked into the store wearing a Grace Under Pressure shirt - of which you told him you wore only because he got you into Rush; Peter thought he heard wedding bells. But, oh���wait. No. The doors chimed again.

Peter felt his resolve instantly weaken around you. Whatever aloof front of speedster confidence he held onto seemed to melt away. Mostly. Partially.

In the closet, he grinned into the kiss, tasting your giggles on his tongue as he coaxed you into something deeper. You were such an undeniable sweetheart. A ray of sunshine, casting light on the most boring summer of his life. Clinging bashfully to his intense kisses, you followed the motion of his tongue. Your own tongue raveled delicate threads with his. Overzealous, he tangled those threads in frantic knots. Peter breathed the softest groan, running strong hands down your back and just above-

Passionate rock songs rang out love ballad riffs in his head, and the music halted to a disappointing stop when - all at once, a veil of blinding light washed over you both. Moment ruined. What asshole would even dare? You pulled away from his kiss, but an eager Peter chased your lips. He only stopped himself once he noticed a figure looming in the closet doorway. Steve looked unamused, holding a broom and dustpan in hand.

“Can I help you?” Peter sarcastically quipped.

“Really, man? Really?” Steve scoffed, cheeks pinkening. Clearing his throat, his dark eyes shifted. Away from the couple getting a little too cozy. He stated in a matter-of-fact way, “FYI, you’re still on the clock, yanno? Jesus.”

“Jesus? I’m flattered, Harrington, but you can just call me Peter.”

A soft snicker erupted from your swollen lips. Your small hands curled shamefully into Peter’s work vest, narrowly avoiding the band pins stuck in the fabric. Ultimately, you failed to keep your giggles at bay. Peter always had a way of making you laugh til you cried. His own hands rested just above your booty, a centimeter away from some spicy grab action. Damn you, Steve. Damn you. Teasing an indignant sigh, Peter reached out to lazily snag the door handle.

“Ever heard of knocking?” He joked before easing the door closed, sealing your cute chuckles inside.

The icy cold, freeze-your-balls-off month of January. Post New Years.

Bundled up in a warm, turtleneck sweater and matching, black jeans; Peter cozied up next to you on the sofa. At his mom’s place, Wanda was perched comfortably on the floor. She kept her back against the foot of the couch close to Peter. In one of the loveseats, Lorna sat with her legs tucked under her. A blanket draped over her small frame. The faint hum of infomercials in the background went ignored, as Peter fell into a long winded info dump about the Lord of the Rings.

Peter’s mother padded into the room from the kitchen. A hand-made shawl covered her shoulders, knitted by Wanda and given to Magda as a gift. Carrying several glass bottle sodas, she passed one out to each of her kids before delivering the last one to you. Magda breathed a chuckle. She noticed the way you narrowed your eyes, as you struggled to follow Peter’s speedy rambling. His family seemed to have no problem keeping up. They understood every word, without asking him to stop and reiterate.

Lorna rolled her eyes affectionately. Wanda gazed up at her brother like he held all the secrets of the universe - and she wanted the details on every single one.

When Peter’s rambling eventually ceased, his mother asked him if he had any plans for the future. He poked inside his empty box of chow mein with a pair of chopsticks. A bit embarrassed, Peter grinned. Now that he finally scored his GED - he knew exactly what he wanted to do. He just hadn’t told anyone aside from Wanda yet. She patted Peter on the knee. A gesture of encouragement, pushing him to open up. With a timid sigh, he confessed - he wanted to teach at Xavier’s.

He got a big ol’ hug from mom for that one.

When she left for work, Peter snuggled up on the couch with you and his sisters. You were all crammed in like warm penguins on a chilly night. Until Peter randomly pushed himself out of the pile. He stumbled forward, checking his watch. Waving his soda in your face, he winked.

“Babe, hold this for me? I almost forgot I wanted to do something.”

Before you could ask, he zipped away and returned in a nanosecond. Peter threw himself into the cuddle puddle.

“Where’d you even go?” You asked, scooting aside to give him more room.

Peter snatched his soda and shrugged, lazily smirking.

“Dropped by Family Video. Tied Steve’s shoelaces together.”

[lincolndjarin]

where i've been, where i'm going.

｡･:*˚:✧｡

hello lovelies!

soooooo...... i was gone for like two months. weird. i don't really have a good excuse for what happened it was just a lot of change in a short period of time and i needed to get used to it.

i realized the job i was at was making me miserable. i didn't want to do anything i enjoyed. all i wanted to do when i wasn't working was lay in bed, it was a bad place for me to be but that had been my job for six years and i'm 22.

so i put my efforts into finding something i wanted to do and last month i started my new job as a preschool teacher!

for the last month i have been miss lexi! (first name reveal, i will still be using my pen name though lol.) and for the first time in my life i actually like my job. with the new job, it took me a few weeks to settle in. even though i love it, it did leave me extremely tired (and sick but that is to be expected lol) for a while. as of this last week, i have finally started to get my energy back and i am so excited that i finally have time for my hobbies.

here's the part that is actually relevant to my writing and the future of my updates.

i loved writing. and i still do. this is not me quitting or no longer writing.

but in order for me to continue loving what i do, i need to write what makes me happy and what i am invested in. which is why i think it's for the best that i put every now and then on hiatus.

i loved working on and writing it but a lot has changed in my life and i just don't think it's right for me to work on right now, i don't know when i'll start it up again or, if i'm being completely honest, if i'll start it again. i will try to at some point but for now in order for me to start writing again it needs to be something that i am 100% invested in.

so what does that mean for what ill be posting????

i dont know!

but i know that i'm going to start writing again. at my own pace, and it will be something i love and i hope that you all love it as well. it will still be pedro because i cannot out grow that man lol but i'll just have to see where my writing takes me. i'm hoping to have something new for you all within the next week but i'm not going to rush myself, i do my best work when i don't put pressure on myself and if i am making and sharing something i want it to be the best thing i am capable of.

i love you all, and i'm incredibly grateful for everyone who's checked in on me and i hope that i can continue to create enjoyable stories for all of you. <3

[mars101]

Act 7: -> Scene 1: traitor...

WRITTEN PART -> (1.1k) -> literally only one ss after

the music was booming as yin entered the small courtyard, cheers ringing in her ears as friends surrounded her, eager to congratulate the bride.

“Yin!! Oh my god, baby, you're so cute!”

Y/n walked over after Yin walked away from the crowd, her hands reach up to her cheeks, and a peck is planted on them. A lipstick mark is left behind on Yin's cheek.

“mom!!~”

“Oops sorry Yin hehe. Do you know where your friend Sunoo is? I need someone to help bring out our karaoke speaker so your aunts and I can ‘preform’ in a bit”

“why not me?? i can help”

Y/n playfully smacks Yin's shoulder, “Baby it's your own party. I can't make you do that”

“it's not that you ‘can't’, you don't want me to do it”

y/n then notices sunoo from afar and rushes over to him as yin is pulled away by friends. she's dragged onto a table by yuna who's having the time of her life dancing to the song playing.

“wifey~ come on and dance! your mom made some drinks at the bar, and they are soooooo good”

yuna handed yin her drink with a wink, “yuna, my mom said no drinks so that i'm not hungover tomorrow..” said girl, put the glass to yin's lips while turning her head looking at y/n, “shes not looking hurry!”with this information, yin grasped onto the glass and quickly threw her head back so the smooth drink slid down quickly before her mom noticed. she removes it from her lips with an exaggerated sigh and raises her arms with a cheer.

Miyeon's voice is heard over the speaker, “Ladies and few gentlemen!! Presenting.. for one night, and one night only-”

“Because that's all the energy we've got left!”

“Speak for yourself!- Coming back after years awayyyy~ Welcome… The Dynamos!!!!”

within the cheers that arose as y/n, miyeon, and jiwoo re-entered the courtyard (they walked out to put on stage outfits and make a dramatic entrance), yin was the loudest as she’s always wished to watch her mom perform again after finding old clips from her aunt’s camcorder.

Y/n smiled and winked at Yin as she got into position.

“Super trouper lights are gonna find me”

“But I won't feel blue~ Like I always do~”

“Cause somewhere in the crowd, there's you~”

Excitement was shared through-out the crowd as the music started again and the three ladies started to sway side to side, Sunoo on his phone recording the whole thing making sure to catch the reaction of Yin who had the brightest smile on her face.

”I was sick and tired of everything when I called you last night from Glasgow”

“All I do is eat and sleep and sing. Wishing every show was the last show”

“So imagine I was glad to hear you’re coming, suddenly I feel all right”

“That’s our song!” A man said as he looked to the two others behind him while sticking his head out to hear more.

“Your song?”

“Says who?”

Younghoon, Hyunjae, and Juyeon were heading up the stairs on the hill to reach the small courtyard. The latter having seen bright lights from his boat and wanting to check it out.

“Tonight the Super Trouper, beams are gonna blind me.”

“But I won't feel blue, like I always do~”

“Cause somewhere in the crowd there's… you.”

Y/n's smile wavered as she caught sight of the three men in the back of the crowd. Her eyes darted from the men to her daughter back and forth, scared of the chance that Yin will look back and notice her three possible fathers.

“So I'll be there when you arrive. The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive”

“And when you take me in your arms and hold me tight. I know it's gonna mean so much tonight~”

The mother and daughter each blow kisses to each other as the chorus of the song repeats.

“Tonight the super trouper, lights are gonna find me-”

“They're here, look. look right.”

“Shining like the sun. Oh my god. Smiling, having fun. Feeling like a number one~"

Y/n and Miyeon mumble to eachother as Jiwoo, or Chuu currently, takes the center part. She takes the bachelorette onto the stage by the hand and makes her dance.

“Tonight the Super Trouper, beams are gonna blind me.”

“But I won't feel blue, like I always do~”

“Cause somewhere in the crowd, there's Yin!!”

As the music stops, Yin is pulled into an embrace by her mother as her friends cheer for her. Behind them, Miyeon tells Jiwoo about the three men who appeared.

“They're here! Back of the crowd- No wait!-”

“excuse me! the three men over there! this is a private celebration. if you're looking for the bar, it's over there-”

“oh shit-” yin finally notices the three men and tries to ignore the fact that they're all glancing at her mom while awkwardly apologizing.

“Baby, We'll be back. Just need to get out of these tight and uncomfortable outfits into a tight and comfortable outfit”

the girl nods as her mom and aunts go through that back door again. she jumps off the stage to her friends who have a look on their face.

“yin.. i don't care if your wedding is tomorrow you are dying tonight! what are they doing here??”

“i didn't invite them?? you and yuna were with me the whole time. plus this is my bachelorette party, i do really want to find out who my dad is but this is the last event that i would even invite him to.”

“so that means…yuna…”

karina and yin turn to yuna and their shoulders drop as they look at her in disappointment.

“??? don't look at me what?? yin, you were in the shower with me. i never use my phone in the shower-”

“okay babe, i think you need to reword that a little..”

“yeah yeah moral of the story, none of us invited them and me and yin showered together”

“no we didn't?—”

“so now what?”

karina fakes a thinking motion before point straight at yin, “you. go ask them.”

“huh?? ask them what?”

“ask them if they want a slice of lemon or lime with their drink- yin are you kidding me? ask them why they're here!”

“fine.. but one shot before i go ask”

“yin!-”

synopsis = a day before her wedding day, Yin decides to find her father so he can walk her down the isle, the problem? There's three candidates: Lee Juyeon, Kim Younghoon, and Lee Hyunjae.

author’s note: "you're late" "you're late" nuh uh 🤭🤭 who said that? 😒😒 i did nuh uh nuh uh 😁😝😁😝 im not late nuh uh hehe haha im not late you're late ahahaha 😆😆😆 so silly so silly so silly

last/next

masterlist

taglist:

@boomhoon , @sanasour , @loonaluvz , @jaerisdiction , @cowsmicwu , @jundundun , @piripurora

[squarebracket-trickster]

Thumbprint Tag

Rules: look back on your work, both past and present, finished and unfinished. What are five to ten narrative elements or tropes that continuously pop up in your work? Give a list of these things!

@on-noon don't mind if I jump on your open tag. I can get soooooo weirdly specific with this...

Oh yes, and I am going to carry on the open tag. Anyone that wants to join may.

Read More because oddly specific requires lots of words--

A female character from a very disadvantaged background (see political prisoner, indentured servant, peasant, enslaved person, poor etc.) who has an unlikely meet cute with someone (male) who turns out to be extremely privileged (see royalty, crazy rich etc.). They become friends. One day she has a really rough day, ends up sick, and he takes care of her (like makes her meals, rubs her shoulders, holds her hair when she throws up etc.). They don't end up dating until a while after this happens. If I had a nickel for every time this shows up in a story I'd have dollars by now.

Two or three female characters that my straight-ass spends years trying to ship with every palatable male character in the story to see if I can make them date. After years without success I finally realize that these characters are lesbians and they were made for each other. When their story arcs get finalized into canon they have an epic friends-to-lovers slow burn romance.

A main female character that, in hindsight, should have been my clue that I had ADHD. Re: talks too fast, says the most random shit, won't shut up, sits weirdly in chairs, really good in a crisis, always waving her hands when she talks, sensory issues galore, no eye contact, last minute queen, always has a song stuck in her head, can list 50 digits of pi but can't remember why the fuck she just walked into that room, and most importantly, me saying about this character, "I feel so relaxed when I write/daydream about her. It's like a release. Like, I can finally be myself and do all the things people think are annoying, but everyone in her life thinks she's funny and likes her energy." Like, you might as well have written MASKING ADHD directly across my forehead.

A monarchy that becomes a republic by the end of the story because I want to write about attractive princes and badass queens/empresses but I am also an anti-monarchist...

A character who was based off an irl friend that lost relevance in the story and got written out, only for me to eventually drift away from that friend or discover that they weren't the friend I thought they were.

Long rants about whatever topic I am learning about in uni at that time (assigned to a particular character for plot reasons). This week's rant was on Populism...

A couple that I decided could never be a couple because the power imbalance and political nonsense was too problematic, who ended up becoming a couple anyways because I have no self-control and them being together was just so *feels*. When all is finalized into canon, these couples get a glorious enemies-to-lovers slow burn that lasts several years and plenty of denial (in homage to my own feelings on the subject).

That moment when a character takes off their disguise and reveals that they are, in fact, a princess, goddess, secret agent etc. in order to save someone's life.

Idk what some of these say about me. idk if I want to know...

[vyvesvi]

saw all the ep 3 performances but not the actual ep lol.

voting list (week 3)

all of these girls are criminally low compared to how they performed imo.

first round commentary (copied from my twitter 🫶🏿)

1. team: hard

my winner(s): like 6/7 but emma jaoying & P.AMP stood out, it's a shame geumhee was hidden for her high note

this team is great but who decided the concept/outfits 😭

2. team: 7 rings

my winner(s): WANG KE (and vita)

the other girlies didn't stand a chance against wang ke this was legit brutal 😭 i do wonder if they were all comfortable with the concept though, this doesn't seem like something liliana wouldve chosen?

also rei is my girl but this performance doesn't play to her strengths at all im devastated 😭

3. team: one more last time

my winner(s): DUNA, rose

duna's experience really shone through, plus she fits this concept super well. very glad she got center. rose also did super well, i only wish she had the second main part 😭 praying this saves her

devi also did great, but i don't think this'll be enough unfortunately:/

4. team: i like you

my winner(s): zoi, TEGAN, tk

i had to think about this team bc once again, so insanely hard to pretend this is live. zoi was just good onstage, tegan has that voice, and tk surprised me. they clearly want preemy gone tho i hate it hereee

5. team: kick back

my winner(s): QIAO YIYU

honestly i love love love this team composition but i don't think the stage really showed their strongest points...i think a different wayv song would've made all the difference tbh

6. team: booty bomb

my winner(s): yeham, coco, MAO XIUTING

tbh there are some people here with lots of screentime who i don't understand the hype for, although both of them did better than their auditions. anyways yeham!!! she barely got screentime apart from her lines but i loved her voice with this concept tbh, it added a much needed freshness? brightness? to the performance. i need to see a full stage ver with no cuts though

7. team: love destiny 2

my winner(s): PANGJANG (everyone did well though)

pangjang just has the voice, what is there to say really. i feel soooooo bad for ninnint, she did well but this was really not the song for her. fly high girlie 😔✊️

8. team: play with me

my winner(s): YEAN, elyn, caith

seoyeon has greater ability than a lot of the contestants but her energy really isn't there to the point where i can't help but wonder if it's on purpose...?

9. team: i'll do it how you like it

my winner(s): ?

the chaba krista rjing vocal meal in the beginning was so sick omg

the rest of the performance didn't really click even though no one was bad at all. need maliya to be saved though like that's a Face

picking a winner is tough for this team because you have some singers who can't dance/perform & some dancers who don't sing as well. in truth pream, rjing, xueyao, and maybe maliya are the most balanced, but xueyao in particular didn't really stand out. pream stood out because of her center time, but this is far from her best (her presence is usually a lot stronger). maybe id go with rjing? but id need to see a full stage with no cuts

10. team: pieces of love

my winner(s): KITTIE

you have to suspend your disbelief a bit with these shows but i couldn't even pretend this was live & it's so distracting 😭 yuan ke & jessica are my next picks but i need them to focus more on facial expressions

my top 9?

honestly i've had a really hard time coming up with a group, if only because i genuinely like 47ish of the contestants (others i dont like or simply don't know). also, i do think it'd be nice for most of the group to be thai. i scrolled through the contestants and just picked the first 9 that i saw who made me go "yeah, you" lmfao and this is what i ended up with:

yean feels virtually indispensable at this point. she can dance, she's a great pop vocalist, and she can fit any concept. the show is also very on her side.

wang ke's performance in 7 rings convinced me of her star power (honestly she's been hit or miss to me until this point). wang ke didn't need to be the best singer or dancer to stand out on stage, it's her energy that really sets her apart and that's a hard skill to learn.

tegan...she's just a surprisingly strong contestant. i wasn't really a fan of how she acted during the theme song arc (all 7.5 minutes of it, lol) but i do understand that she was trying to lighten the mood. from the theme song to round one she showed that she really could hold her own on stage if she put her mind to it. other factors: star quality, demographic appeal, growth idolism, unique tone/strong vocals

rose is my underrated pick. she has a great voice and i think she can be styled to fit a number of concepts. she hasn't gotten much screentime, but i really hope she makes round 2, just to force the show to show more of her strengths. in some ways she's a little bit filler here, but i think she's necessary for the group to gel

ruan, our summer dream center...idk i just like her a lot. she suits different concepts and is super super hardworking & serious about this, while also being really kind. i want to see her learning/speaking more thai and english hopefully!

qiao yiyu is a talent & demographic pick (and one of my overall main picks at this point) she's another member who i see as indispensable. she's a main dancer who can fit multiple styles (but she's also for the girlies). in this pic she kinda looks like yuqi? lmfao

p.amp, my other totally biased pick 🥲 she's so gorgeous onstage and has so much presence i don't understand why the masses aren't seeing her 😭. she's a filler visual here but hot take, we don't need a wannabe gangsta rapper who can't dance self proclaimed quote unquote "real rapper" in the lineup when so many gg raps are pre-written and last for max 4 lines. p.amp can do it while dancing, being charming, and looking hot. i rest my case

geumhee is my pick of the csr members, although duna's rank is the best & seoyeon is the one getting a storyline. geumhee would be slightly filler here, but her singing ability would make her a lead vocal, and he experience and preexisting intl audience would make her indispensable. tbh she's the first member i personally noticed in csr, but i think that csr could live for a couple years without her and then benefit from her return.

mingming is good, although im generally on the fence about her. she has great lead vocal potential and is very likable. i kind of think the mindy members will be fine if none of them make it, but i do feel her voice is a little wasted there.

nationalities: 4 thailand, 2 china, 1 usa, 1 japan, 1 south korea

other contestants to consider:

pailiu! i really like her (and she's currently rank 2) but im not seeing a group that she fits into in the top ranks. maybe if maliya, jessica, xueyao, yuanke, p.amp, jaoying, etc were a bit higher. it's too soon to tell though i suppose

elyn's (#1) fanbase is really showing out for her considering the relatively minimal screentime she's had. her vocals aren't as strong as rose's, but she could potentially replace her in the lineup and add more (in terms of fan loyalty & demographic appeal).

emma not making my off the top of my head top 9 was really unexpected! i make the top 9 and then went wait where's emma? i think i would replace mingming with her, although honestly? emma's a star and should probably try to go to a company with some power, like perhaps yuehua china. for a survival show group, it's good that she stands out as an individual but in terms of cohesion...eh. she couldn't be filler, but she also probably couldn't be the star with the rest of this lineup. it's tough

absolutely LOVE krista's voice, but the reason i stopped voting for her is that she is kind of an absolutely miserable dancer. the great part is that she's super young, and can train to work on her dancing & her stage presence + facial expressions. krista (and others) make me wish that chuang was like produce japan, where the funding company (there lapone, here ryce) takes on trainees from the show for future permanent or temporary groups. krista would be a great candidate for that.

kitty, natty, & jaoying i noticed for the first time this round. i don't have much to say but they would be very solid filler members (not a drag, btw). im looking forward to seeing more of them!

yuan ke & wan yan jiayi are growing kind of indispensable if they want to have a foothold in china it seems. my personal pick would be yuan ke, but i think jiayi is moreso on the rise.

TBH i have 21 more contestant photos saved but let me just move onto another potential top 9

all i did was replace rose & mingming with elyn & emma, which brings the nationality count to: 2 thailand, 3 china, 1 japan, 1 usa, 1 malaysia, 1 south korea. see but now i'd say they need at least one more thai member! now sort of i want to put jaoying in over elyn lol. oh well 🤷🏿‍♀️

[linabirb]

HI LINAAA!!! Multitasking today, 💌 and for the questions, 9 20 25 27 please!! <3

HI HI TARUUUUU

you're such a kind and sweet person?? like you're so nice to talk to and you always have something interesting to say! i love how passionate you are about your interests and it's always so fun to hear you talk about them! you're soooooo talented and your art skills are getting better and better at such a high speed like i'm genuinely impressed SLAY!! your writing is so soft and nice to read, like it has this comfy and cozy vibe! your blog themes are always so pretty too and they're so edible! i love how aesthetically pleasing they are! you're very squishy :] also azulchi best enemies to lovers slow burn otp we love to see it

for the ask game:

9. do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)?

i-i don't have one actually 😭 vil wouldn't be happy to hear it, but skincare and caring about my looks in general is just.. too exhausting and i don't have time and energy for that (dyeing my hair and painting my nails is a whole different thing). i might do a face mask if i feel like it, though my only motivation for that is that my cousins got me a lot of products like that for the new year, so uh. yeah! (also my mom was shocked when she found out that i genuinely don't know how to use like. almost all of those products. sorry mom my art and edits may look cute but my irl self is just. a gremlin JSJKDKSKLSL)

20. favorite disney princess movie?

the little mermaid, frozen and the princess and the frog!

25. would you say you have good taste in music?

probably?? but ngl i have a habit to just. listen to like ten same songs on repeat until i literally start feeling sick. and a lot of my favorite songs are just songs that i used to listen to back in early 2010's so.. (also god i hate how when i find a really cool song and i'm like OOOOHH I LIKE IT I'M GONNA ADD IT TO SO MANY PLAYLISTS- and then i see that it's like. a tiktok song. and i'm not special for finding it and almost everyone is listening to it rn and making edits with it.)

27. what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

it really depends on the weather! but when i go out, i often wear a black sweatshirt with a cute frog on it, red and green plaid pants with some chains on them and neon green sneakers! when i'm at home though, i usually like to wear like. really huge t-shirts. i'm wearing one rn actually and it's pink :]

[katbrando]

[ questions are from this post, answered 1-10 here ]

11-20 - ATTRACTION

🔹 First impressions of each other? for me: "sick, this guy loves animals and handles them with a lot of care, so he must be a decent guy" and for him: "what a shame that this girl is so painfully quiet and shy because she's really quite the looker" LMAO

🔹 How close were you as friends before you got together?  pretty damn close!!!! i'm demisexual so it takes a large amount of trust and familiarity with someone before i can develop feelings. at the start of our friendship i call him "dude" and "bro" (still do sometimes) and tbh the 'best friends' aspect of our relationship is still very prominent

🔹 Who fell for the other first? diego LMAOOO he's weak for a girl who bites back at him and can match his energy, which is something that's easy for me once i'm close to someone.. one day i jokingly told him to shut up and jabbed him in the ribs and he was like "oh shit 😳"

🔹 What initially attracted you to them versus what they were attracted to?  besides his charming personality and beautiful accent? im a sucker for that pretty face of his 😩 his short stature is soooo charming too.. seeing him in normal clothes outside of work was also a Big source of attraction. for him i'm sure it was initially the fact that i was playing hard to get HJKFDHKGS he loves a good challenge

🔹 How do you match up with your first crushes? he doesn't line up with my first crush at all LOLLLL he's a dude and he's an asshole (affectionate).. i probably don't line up with his either, if he can even remember who his first crush was (he's had many 💀)

🔹 Your top 3 favourite things about them versus theirs about you. omggg :')) his determination, his sense of humor, and his loyalty, for sure.. for HIM i think he probably likes my silly goofy nature, the amount of care i have for people (esp him), and my stubbornness (even though it conflicts with his fairly often)

🔹 The physical traits you love of theirs. literally Everything!!! but his BEAUTIFUL eyes oh my god... so sharp and bright ugghhh.. also his hair, it's so messy and pretty, very similar to mine just a little longer 🥰 his chest and thighs and of course his A S S, it's so perfect and takes a strap so well

🔹 The personality traits you love of theirs. i basically listed them in the other question but yeah idk he's just so goofy despite appearing so intense and mean ??? he's funny but also he can be so cliche in his romantic gestures, he's very very caring as well, it just takes a longass time for him to reach that point.. but once he's there, he's there for good 🥺 also i love his attitude... it's honestly very attractive when he's having a fit and bickering with me, oof

🔹 How publicly affectionate are you? Is it cringe, embarrassing or do you love PDA? superfans of PDA tbh... well, mostly him HJKFDS i like it in theory but i'm very shy by default and hate people looking at me.. but also the idea of him being possessive over me in public is soooooo 😩 so he can go ham, i don't care.. and it's nice to feel loved enough to a point where he doesn't care what other people think

🔹 Is sex important to this relationship? Why or why not? y e s ..... he has a high sex drive and it's hard to match that sometimes, but he's aware of it and makes a point to pay attention to my comfort levels and to please me as much as he possibly can.. and tbh i'm very much into the idea of him having the time of his life so even if i'm not necessarily dead-set on getting off, i love being able to experience all of it with him 🥺 he's just so beautiful and perfect and the way he's putty in my hands absolutely wrecks me, i can't help it

[kurai-hono-blog]

venting ahead

I feel so deeply unloved that i literally just want to bash my head against a wall just don't stop till my brain is mush JUST so I dont have to feel like this anymore. My parents- the people I have to live with becoz I work close to home are nothing but neglectful pieces of shits. Cannot be bothered abt my health until it gets worse enough to require hospital care and then ONLY care about the bill and my recovery UNTIL they have to pay the bill. Aftercare or preventive care can go fuck themselves. Any thing and I mean ANYTHING I ask for is asking for too much from people who are soo busy dealing with their own adult problems (they don't have that much going on, but they never solve any of their own problems just complain about it till it piles up and LOOKS like a lot of problems).

I have always been independent because I wanted to be nothing like them. But even the most independent people need loving, need someone to fight for them. I can never have that with them or anyone else in my life for that matter.

I am loosing interest in everything i loved and cant muster energy for anything new. I hate how the person I am always becomes reduced to a scared crying kid just trying to survive whenever I come back home. It's why I left for college. It's why I applied for job in a different state. Rotten luck that they had another office in my city otherwise I would have moved out already.

I crave love sooooooo badly right now- the kind that only someone living close to you can provide. I neeeed someone to take care of me when I get sick/injured no matter if I can do it on my own. I need someone to cook for/with me because they want to make me happy, not because cooking is a chore that just has to get done. I want someone to be happy for my success and cheer me on instead of casting doubt if I so much as stumble in life. I need someone to listen to my issues and actually change their behavior instead of just apologising and making the same mistake again and again.

I know life is more about just your parents and there are more good people out there. But I don't think I have much strength in me to get to them If I am walking around a hole this big where my hearth should be. And I will most likely have soooooo many behaviour issues by then that it won't even matter becoz I wont even be able to hold onto any meaningful relationships just like I couldn't in college or school before that.

I don't know when I will quit living but I think it will most likely be voluntary death and If it happens while my parents are still alive- I bet they will still grieve while not having a clue about what caused it.

I hate that I live in a culture where dating is frowned upon, so I can't even search for this love outside. Funnily enough I might not even wanna look for it even if I could. Cause the disaster that was my childhood has taught me that your partners will only ever hurt you. So I don't even feel love towards anyone until they show me love again and again. Like I am some sort of feral animal. And all the people I have met so far don't have that kind of patience, they just wanna get laid.

[trolagygirl2022]

Hi Mimi, it hasn’t been long so I discovered your account but I love it already. I noticed before I began following you you’d do astrology and tarot games. Would you ever do those again I’d love to participate.

Hi! I'm quite sick atm plus I have a lot going in my life rn! (traveling in a few hours, moving, etc) soooooo I honestly don't know LOL. I'm bored so I might be able to do an exchange game in a while from now but right now I barely have energy 😪

[ayamisc]

Catching the Flu, and the 1st Week of Collegio

(c) Miyazaki Hayao, Kadono Eiko (Kiki's Delivery Service)

Soooooo..

as you all know. i've had a REALLY busy sched this past month now.

and…

well. common sense really.

no break.. no rest = lesser immunity = easier for you to get sick

and as such. i caught the flu. grrrr.

got it from my dad actually. X(

anyhow. so.

started not feeling well around sunday night…slept it off thinking i just needed rest. we all did.

monday morning…. i'm freezing like hell in the 80F temperature….yes, it's raining..but still it's hot.

so. i feel like crap all morning.

then drank medication. then went on the 5hour trip by bus to go back to the city coz i had school the next day. grrrrrrrrrrreat.

add to the fact the bust i rode on was aironditioned. EVEN GREATER. -_-

so yeah. me = feeling crap. arrived around 8pm.

slept. then woke up at 5….. to see nothing prepared for my 1st day of college. hell, i don't even know where my classes are….. and i didn't even have the energy to get up the bed.

i went to school anyway, strictly following the every 4-hour medication treatment..even at school.

so, tuesdays for me end at 5:30pm.

again, arrived at the house at 630 then ate dinner… and slept again.

again, no time to prepare. sooo beat up.

wednesday. i wake up..and wait. i don't have any voice. at all. ever greeeeeeeeat. -_-

so i go to school again…. and same routine goes for next 2 days.

thursday afternoon, i start feeling better…. and actually had time to look at what i put in my bag for school…but still. dead beat since tues and thurs… i get off at 530…. and i'm HELLA tired.

so. now friday. yes. break. rest. AMEN.

…oh and did i mention coughing is sooooooooo goddamn annoying? o_0

….at least i have my voice back, right?

PS for all you other Narutards there. …wtf KAKASHI. don't you DARE follow the road of my other fave characters!!! ..and while Kakashi made me..cry…. Haruhi made me smile…no..scratch that. she made me laugh out loud..wahahaha

blink ..the end….

PS. This blog was originally posted on DeviantArt.

[pompettepink]

SAY IT AGAIN!!!

Because actually not only has this been a thing since jfashion started trickling into international communities, but this has absolutely EXPLODED in commonality since musically turned into tiktok and started bastardizing everything and anything fashion related

I've seen MULTIPLE girls being ran off that app for committing the crime of being a fashionista of color. And being light skinned has NOT saved these girls either, so you can imagine how much worse it is when they're darker

Maybe this is just the corners of the internet I run in but nobody every tells a white woman she's too pale to pull of jfashion. Not even in communities like gyaru where tans are expected have I seen a white woman be told that she's too light! (Lizzie Bee is seen as the queen of gyaru, has anyone every told her she's too pale to pull off agejo?? Meanwhile people practically trip over themselves to tell black girls that they're too dark for sweeter gyaru aesthetics or that they should just stick to yamanba and even recommend B Gal to them!! Like WHAT!?)

And God forbid these women do interviews or Q & A or give a style history or dress up for the camera. They'll 100% of the time get hit with "this is pure misinformation! I don't think you've been in the community long enough to speak about it! You're fake! They don't do this in Japan!" Actual clown shit!! Japanese aesthetics manifesting themselves differently across the world DOESNT mean the person is a complete fake! It's like you said, some styles aren't active and people evolve. Ganguro and Cult Party Kei are both low key "dead" in Japan, but the girlies over here still wear it and they wear it in their OWN way but still keep the SPIRIT of the fashion!

People really do get soooooo hateful when they see black and latina girls doing anything kawaii dolly jfashion lifestyle related, but they never keep that energy for white girl. And this isn't me saying to take cheap shots at white girls so don't go there

But what I AM saying is that people only show up to criticize white women in jfashion when they're actively Asian fishing or being perverted and nothing else. What we should be focused on is leaving the paper bag test behind!

You guys don't come for white women and you guys don't come for racist jfashion communities the way you do for brown girls. That's not an argument, it's an observation

It's tired and I'm sick!!

you know, i find it kinda sus that "interviewing non japanese people" becomes a problem when its black and latina people being interviewed. if the fashion is no longer active in japan, what is there to do about it. the international community remains an alive, evolving thing.

also, i did love in mori kei the fact that we dont have a specific word made up to insult people who do it "wrong" (subjective), like, say, lolita. so how about lets not start one now???

.

[barbatos-the-loyal-butler]

.

[floralbfs]

missing the times in elementary school when exam season was my favorite time ever because there was no homework, no stress and just free time

[pan0ramy]

a summary of @therealjacksepticeye’s spider-man interview

[blackvahana]

Here's the logic:

I heavily associate them and seljies already with a certain unincarnated self. I just don't know how much of that is literal and how much isn't literal. I'm sick of Fiction over my life, I'm sick of being like "here's me I'm this!" and it's just. fictional understandings of what I am. Then again, all identities are part fiction and roleplay lmfao

Lev is clearly the one putting this in my head and pushing me to it and. I trust him to know wtf he's doing

There's something about Carrion Crow aspect here. That aspect was involved in the weapon I made, it's clearly time to stop ignoring it. Carrion Crow: The Black Hole over the battlefield, the immense pull down into death, the influence of Death (Lev but also me) over fights. The Singing Void. The Black Hole: Nataraja, lord of the dance, the one who's song we are all brought to dance to, the ruler of consciousness and magnetism and. other things

Madness. Absolutely. uh. it. well. Thinking about that time I was like a mile away from one of Lev's body and was luring his consciousness into my mind, ie bringing him into unreality bc my. energy. does that by attaching to peoples Consciousnesses and bringing them in

Ahhhh the Almadia is involved. that huge body I have on the Outskirts, the nursery of this universe. That's slightly.. interesting and I'm gonna need to see that in person bc that's heavy and fucking big info against my the "don't bark if you can't bite" rule, not gonna say what I can do if I can't back it up

It's just... Been something I've related to for so long and I never admit it. Choral singing emanates from me. Madness draws inwards - so does Sleep. so does Day. So does Night. So does so many parts of me.

The way I kill things on the astral by lulling them into bliss lmfao and they don't fight back and don't know they're being killed that's. what the fuck do I think that is? Lmfao?

And I want to say "but I do this with auras and bodies and shit" first of all feels soooooo good to have the a-ok to work song into this. Holy shit! I think this may tame Madness if I can tune it to song! Second of all. sorry. what do I call reality working for me? The Choir. next question.

Do I really have to finally confront the Siren thing