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collaredsoldat · 2 months ago

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Domestic Winter Soldier / Soldat Stuff

warnings: PTSD | Slight self-harm | Mentions past abuse

a/n: Idk I wanted to write this because he deserves some love even when he's the soldier. Various hcs about domestic life with the Winter Soldier. Actual fics in the works. I run four blogs so I try to balance it all. Not edited ignore mistakes.

Soldat is a little awkward with home life at first. He isn't sure what to do, being free from constant control isn't something he can easily adjust to.

He looks to you for commands all the time. Can he sit? Can he go to the bathroom? Can he sleep? Can he eat? Every little thing he does. You have to reassure him that he doesn't need to ask permission for anything, but he still does.

He sometimes gets snappy at you, since he still can't decide whether or not to trust you 100% or not. He can't understand why someone is being so nice to him.

Sometimes he accidentally breaks something and he flinches away from you, or he hides out of fear. You have to coax him out, telling him it's okay and that you're not going to hurt him. He always hesitates.

He struggles to sleep so he comes into your room most nights and stares at you or roughly shakes you to wake you up. "Can't sleep." he speaks lowly, and he grunts and climbs over you into your bed, never waiting for a response. At first he sleeps away from the door, but as time goes on he moves to sleep closest to the door in case any unlucky person breaks into your apartment.

Very much like a cat, he stays back but when he wants attention he sort of just...flops near you and demands it by laying on you somehow, or sitting super close so your bodies are touching.

He watches you cook a lot. He sits down at the counter and watches or he stands over you and watches. Sometimes you have to pull him away from the stove because the oil will burn him and he doesn't bother moving away on his own.

He's much more curious than you'd think. He watches you do a lot of things, almost as if he's never seen anything like it. Something as simple as brushing your hair or doing laundry, he's mesmerized by it.

When he's not watching you do something, you notice that he just stares a lot. He always watches you, at first out of uneasiness, but then...just because. He's always watching you, almost like he's worried you'll disappear.

You help him shower, he doesn't like touching his scars. He tries to rub them away, and he's tries to claw his metal arm off. So you help him clean to prevent him from going into one of those episodes of hurting himself in that way.

He used to get aggressive when you came around him when he was naked, treating you like some big threat, but you realized this was something more than just fear. It took a lot for him to get comfortable enough to allow you to touch him in the shower/bath.

For being so heavily trained as the best assassin, he's quite accident prone. Nothing major, but enough to warrant some kind of care. He feels a little confused whenever he gets hurt by accident, like he never expected the corner of the table to leave a small cut on his flesh arm. He focuses too much on things he knows hurt, that other things go unnoticed.

He learns to cook with you some days, he was tired of just watching. It's a good way to show him you trust him too, letting him handle things like knives or sharp objects without worrying he will hurt you.

You learn he really likes pie. Apple pie especially.

You also learn the alarm on the oven is too loud for him so you use your phone instead.

If you bring him out with you, he's very protective. His head is on a swivel, constantly observing everyone around you. He stays glued to your side, not letting you take many steps away from him.

Gets overstimulated easily.

Sounds that are similar to a blender or electricity freak him out. A bug zapper is also a sound he hates.

Some foods he looks at with newfound curiosity, like he hadn't seen them before. There are things he doesn't even recognize, newer or modernized things, he didn't know what to think. What the hell is an air fryer? How do you fry with air??

Get one and watch how he looks at it with amazement and confusion.

He seeks out spaces where he can be alone a lot, he needs space sometimes and you understand.

During bad episodes he sometimes disappears from your apartment, making you panic a little each time. You find him in alleys or the streets from time to time, he never wanders too far. You are worried sick but your priority is to get him back home.

It's hard for him to show it, but he does appreciate you and everything you've done for him. He gives you hugs from behind a lot, sometimes he whispers a word to you, but mostly he's silent.

He likes puzzles. He likes putting them together. Maybe because he himself feels like there are so many pieces of himself missing and it's satisfying to fill a picture.

One thing that calms him down are fresh cookies. Chocolate chip cookies fresh from the oven, he can go from high strung to calm and docile.

He hates porridge and/or oatmeal. It's too similar to the things he was forced to eat in HYDRA. Tasteless slop, he can't stand the texture.

He loves when you brush his hair. His scalp is sensitive since he had his hair yanked and pulled so much, but you're always gentle. He loves feeling your fingers run through it and it puts him to sleep within minutes.

You're the only one who can touch his scars. Not that he is close to anyone else, but he doesn't fight you when your hand roams over where metal meets flesh.

Watches over you when you sleep a lot, his eyes glued to the door and his ears alert to every single sound. He stays up until he literally can't keep his eyes open.

He's very attached to you and never wants to leave you, ever.

Dividers by @/strangergraphics

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #the winter soldier #the winter soldier x reader #winter soldier #winter soldier x reader #bucky barnes comfort #winter soldier comfort #bucky barnes x you #winter soldier x you #james bucky barnes x reader #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes imagines #blythewrites⛓

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curlycow01 · 6 months ago

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Only you

Pairing: Winter Soldier x Reader

Summary: You and the Winter soldier escape hydra together, and feelings for each other are revealed along the way

Meanings: солдат - soldier

Series Masterlist

Read part 2 here

Out of all the test subjects Hydra gave the serum to, only you survive. You and Soldat were the perfect soldiers of Hydra, their greatest weapons. They brainwash you both, but they overdo yours, and break your mind, making you forget all the memories pre serum, the life you previously had.

Hydra sends you both on missions to assassinate high level targets and you both end up saving each other's lives a lot of times, creating this weird dynamic. Even through the fragments of your mind, you seek the Soldat's presence, his powerful stance and intimidating silence, drawing you to him as your only sense of comfort.

No matter how many times Hydra wipes his memories, his feelings for you don't go away. When he realizes he cares about you, he's determined to find a way to save you.

Decades pass and one day Soldat returns from a mission. Looks like he didn't complete it as his metal arm had sustained heavy internal damage. He seems a bit off as you observe him from a corner. Alexander Pierce enters the room and asks him for the mission report.

The soldat doesn't reply, lost in thought. Pierce hits him on the face, the sound echoing through the room. You feel a flash of anger. "The man on the bridge" he says quietly to pierce, his face having a genuine expression of curiosity. "Who was he?"

"You met him earlier this week on another assignment." Pierce answers. "I knew him" Soldst's voice had a hint of faraway recognition. Pierce is clearly not happy. "Your work has been a gift to mankind. You shaped the century, and I need you to do it one more time." he takes a small pause. "If you don't do your part I can't do mine, and Hydra can't give the world the freedom it deserves.

The Soldat's face was sad, he pressed his lips for a second before speaking in a defeated tone "But I knew him" Pierce sighs in frustration and gets up from the chair. He looks at him for a moment before turning to the scientists "Prep him" One of them spoke up "But he's been out of cryo freeze too long." "Then wipe him and start over" Pierce answers.

Your heart skips a beat as you hear those words. Pierce leaves. the scientist push Soldat back in the chair. Machines attach themselves onto his head, cackling with electricity.

You grip the railing tightly as his horrific screams echoed through the room, his naked chest heaving with heavy breathing. Guards come and escort you elsewhere, but his screams were still ringing through your ears.

Hours later

You opened your eyes and stepped out of the cryo freeze, to see the scientists panicking and few armed guards shuffling around uncomfortably.

The head Doctor spoke up "This doesn't change anything. We still have one supersoldier left. The Asset's failure, though frustrating, is not a complete disaster. Captain America is dead. The collision of the helicarriers killed both of them."

Your blood runs cold as the sentence sinks in. A small gasp escapes your lips at the fact that he's gone. He couldn't be, you didn't want to believe it. The Doctor notices your gasp and turns to you with a darkened expression. "Look at this" he says in a mocking tone "You've grown feelings for him, have you?" he scoffs " Having emotions makes you weak. We've lost the Soldat, but we can still use you, make you the next perfect soldier"

You're frozen in place as the Doctor reveals the truth. "Wipe her" he commands the guards in an emotionless voice. You're still rooted to the ground as the guards approach you. They roughly push you into the chair and lock restraints around your wrists.

Your heart is thundering in your chest as the electrocuting machines on either side of your head are switched on with a small hum of electricity. Adrenaline courses through your veins as the contraption starts coming close to you. You shut your eyes tightly, bracing for the pain.

You feel the cool metal closing around your head for a second, then a huge wave of blinding pain shoots through you, it's like the voltage of an electric chair dialed up to 11. Your cries of pain fall on deaf ears, and you barely survive the first wave. Tears streak down your cheeks as you waited for the second wave. But it never comes.

You slowly open your eyes, still blurry with tears. You can't hear much due to the ringing in your ears, but you can make out that the machine's stopped. A loud crash breaks through the ringing, and you try to blink away the tears to see what's going on.

You see the soldat plowing through the guards and the terrified scientists. The way he was landing his punches was in pure rage, nothing like you've ever seen him before. You try to move, but you were tightly bound by the restraints. Your breathing was still ragged, the first wave left you with little energy.

Gentle fingers brush against your cheek, you snap your head from the restraints to see your savior. "солдат?" your voice is low and hoarse as you gaze into his piercing blue eyes, which were laced with concern. "Bucky" he says as he starts freeing you from the restraints.

You try to stand, but your knees were wobbly, Bucky swiftly grabs your arm to steady you. His eyes scan you for any other injuries. "I should have gotten here sooner" he says grimly, his hand wrapped around yours protectively. "They said that you died" you say slowly, looking up at him "They said the crash killed you, but you survived. Why didn't you run?"

"I couldn't leave" Bucky answers, his gaze softening as he continues "Not without you. Not when you were still trapped." His metal arm reached up and brushed some hair that had fallen over your face, this action made your stomach flip. The atmosphere between you two changed.

"So, uh" you say awkwardly, breaking the silence "Where do we go now?" "I have a place in Romania. We should be safe there." He answers.

"Great" You're trying to sound like you're okay, even though you were anything but okay on the inside, all of these emotions swirling inside of you. He could never know you think he'll never feel the same

You started walking to the exit, but Bucky caught your arm. You turned to him "Aren't we leaving?" He took a deep breath before speaking "Before I killed the Doctor, he said that you had grown attached to me and" he paused for a moment and blinked slowly "that you had feelings for me"

Your breath slightly hitched as he finally learnt your secret. "He also tried to insult you, but I snapped his neck before he could finish the sentence" Bucky takes a step closer to you. "Is that true? That- that you have feelings for me?" he asks slowly. You only nodded, not knowing what to say.

"How long?" As you're thinking what to say, you suddenly realize that he's standing close to you, his lips only inches away. how you would love to- woah. Wait a minute. You snap out of your thoughts and rasp out "A while"

His flesh hand reached out and lightly traced your jaw with his fingers "Why didn't you say anything? he asks softly. You hesitated for a moment "I- I thought you didn't feel the same, because hydra removed emotions-" "Hydra couldn't take away this." He interrupted. His hand stilled and pulled away from your jaw. "They couldn't take you away from me. They didn't change the way I feel about you."

His metal arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him. Before you could realize what's happening. his lips were on yours. Your lips perfectly molded his, moving in sync. His other hand moved to the back of your head, pulling you closer and deepening the kiss.

His muscular frame covered you completely as his tongue brushed against your lip, silently asking for entry. You parted your lips slightly, allowing his tongue to slip inside. His tongue danced against yours as his hand moved through your hair.

You both pulled away after a few moments for air. Bucky's metal arm was tracing circles on your hip. "I'll never let them hurt you again" He whispers "I'll always keep you safe." He looks at you with utmost love and affection in his sky-blue eyes.

"Do you think we can make this work?" You whisper back, taking his hand in your own "The world won't accept this. They won't accept us. "Screw the world" Bucky replies firmly and squeezes your hand in reassurance "I don't care about the world, what they say or want, I don't." He intertwines his fingers with yours.

"I only care about you"

#winter soldier x reader #the winter soldier #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #winter soldier fanfic #bucky barnes fanfic

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samodivaa · 1 year ago

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You Are Art

Request : College!Bucky x Artist!Reader where Bucky is a nude model partner for life drawing.

Warnings - smut, soft sex Words - 2.3k AN - Me personally, would draw Soldat. ;o

All art is a kind of confession, more or less oblique—because one eye sees, the other feels. And the human form that you need to draw will include a physiological precondition that is indispensable—intoxication, lust. If you can say your feelings for him in words, there would be no reason to paint him—you wouldn't have asked him to be your model.

Bucky grows pale as death, he gazes into your eyes with a strange, wild, reproachful look as his lips tremble and vainly endeavors to form some words, then his mouth twisted into an incongruous smile. “Should I…undress now?” His face gave evidence of suffering. You are considerably amazed. “Yeah if you are comfortable? Does something worry you?” “I have scars” Bucky says all this perfectly seriously, and without the slightest appearance of joking, indeed, he seems strangely gloomy.

“There is no need to-”you say, seriously and with deference.

Never judge a work of art by its defects―Washington Allston “I want to, I promised you”

He interrupts suddenly, with a look of weariness, focusing on his lungs, on his ability to take a deep breath, to soothe with oxygen as the word rolls off his tongue. He is a handsome man, rather stout, with a very polite and dignified manner. He is always well dressed, and his clothes are always exquisite. Your conscience very soon informs you that is the proper narrative to tell. You met in the first semester, he is a business major looking to commission an artist for his project. You admit, that among the many silly and thoughtless actions of your life, the memory of that encounter comes prominently forward and reminds you that it lay long like a stone on your heart—ever since that, you stayed friends—it makes sense, doesn't it? For him to return the favor. There are a few seconds of dead silence before he goes to your small coach to undress. You eyes are flashing in a most unmistakable way, lips were all quiver as you observe his back muscles flexing. You try to speak, to reassure him, but can’t form words, a great weight seems to lie upon your breast, suffocating you. He’s quite tall with broad shoulders and an athletic physique that even his leather jacket cannot hide. You lick your lips, trying to quench the mental thirst for him—his belt clattering noisily as he unbuckles it, popping the buttons of his jeans open, followed by the low purr of his zipper coming undone, he drifts his hands down his sides and hooks both thumbs into his jeans, sliding them and the boxers down his legs. There is a frightened feeling, which makes him scowl and feel ashamed while removing his jacket and shirt until he is fully naked.

As you sit, your eyes turn to the blank canvas, squinting at it in the dwindling light, trying to concentrate. Then you gaze out the window, study the way snow clings to the spruce beside the building, and wonder how you will manage on your own once you have received your degree. With a sinking heart and a nervous tremor, he finally turns to face you. “So you just want me to sit here?” he whispers at last, drawing his breath with an effort, his nerves are terribly overstrained by now. He is sober, but the excitement of this chaotic situation—the strangest day of his life—has affected him so much that he was in a dazed, wild condition, which almost resembles drunkenness “Okay I will just sit here”

Bucky sits on the bar stool that is next to your canvas and his eyes fall upon yours, stop short, grow white as a sheet, and stares motionless, it is clear that his heart was beating painfully. He is gazing intently, but timidly, for a few seconds. Suddenly, as though bereft of his senses, he moves a bit, putting his hands on his tights. He knows that he won’t get hard—worry empties any dirty thoughts he might have. You are mesmerized by the tiny flecks of indigo in his blue eyes—you can drown in those eyes and it wouldn’t be the worst way to go. His beautiful features offer themselves to your gaze as you trail through them, annoyed at how attractive he looks—putting your mind into a darker cloud of irritation. In spite of this scornful reflection of his current mental state, he is looking cheerful as though he is suddenly set free from the terrible burden of worry and he gazes round. “Just don’t move I need to start with the sketch” You crack your fingers nervously before picking up the piece of charcoal—you stare at him, mentally measuring the propositions which helps you with the composition and scale. As an artist, you dip your brush in your own soul, you paint him with love—but you love him beyond words, beyond paint. And you hope Bucky will feel that once he sees the finished art. “Just tell me when you need a break” “Yeah, okay” he answers firmly, after a brief pause. Your voice is positively reflecting a sort of radiance on his face. You think, staring at him deliberately, that it is just another life painting, simply that's his body, his face, that are his eyes, his nose, and yet at the same time, It's a miracle, it's an ecstasy. And your only concern is to capture his beauty. “It is turning out amazing” you continue, pursuing the whirling ideas that chases each other in your brain “You are art, Bucky” He feels a hammering in his head and a faint smile shows on his face. His eyes are riveted upon yours, at first reluctantly and, as it is, resentfully, and then more and more intently.

Why isn't he saying anything? Did you need to say that out loud? The one time you try to implement that you like him and… So you torture yourself, fretting with questions, and finding a kind of enjoyment in it. And yet all these questions are not new, but suddenly confronting you, they are old familiar aches—it grips and rends your heart—maybe he just sees you as a friend.

It tortures your heart and mind, clamoring insistently for an answer, but you don’t dare turn your eyes to him for several moments. Bucky’s heart is beating violently, and his brain is in turmoil. At that moment something seems to sting him; in an instant a complete revulsion of feeling comes over him. He suffers passively, realizing that his cock is getting hard, but that he must do something, do it at once, and do it quickly.

“Can we take a break now?”

“Of course” you are bewildered, and stare at him open-eyed. You spot it, you can’t miss such a big dick. He gets up and goes to sit on the couch, covering his private parts with his jacket. His thoughts stray aimlessly…he finds it hard to fix his mind on anything at that moment. He longs to forget himself altogether, to forget everything, and then to wake up and begin life anew.

“Things like that happen all the time, no need to be embarrassed. It is nature” Bucky ponders and rubs his forehead, strange to say, after long musing, a spontaneous and by chance, a fantastic idea comes to his mind—to be honest with you. “It is not because of nature” he says all at once, calmly, he has reached a final determination. That answer agitates you, but you keep uneasily seeking for some sinister significance. You get up, slowly moving closer to him, standing in front of his sitting form. Bucky looks at you, your yellow dress of some light silky material, but put on strangely awry, not properly hooked up, and torn open at the top of the skirt, full of colorful stains, close to the waist. You stare straight at him. For one instant, the look on your face, in your eyes, has him puzzled— then he recognizes it. Curiosity—you are shocked, stunned, or thrown into a maidenly fluster. You are curious, you want to hear more, searching his eyes, but couldn't read his thoughts beyond the fact that he is considering you, considering what to tell you. “It is because of you” He stills, but his confident smile doesn't waver.

There is no going back as he removes his jacket, inviting you to madness, to sit on his legs. The sight literally steals your breath. His defined body, his creaminess of his forehead and cheeks, and the determined line of his jaw, the soft vulnerability of his lips, slightly parted. You see the scars on his legs, but your gaze is more drawn to the long block stranding out from his pelvis.

The gorgeous curves of your body somehow delineated beneath taut fabric, his eyes wonder shamelessly to your pink lips simply begging to be kissed. Their shape is etched in his mind, he wants the taste to be imprinted on his senses. "Here? You want me to sit here, on your lap?" The word, weak though it is, accurately reflects your disbelief. Your legs feels suddenly heavy, drowsiness comes upon them.

"Right here. Right now.”

At this time, the setting, his words and the whole picture are so truth-like and filled with details so delicate, so unexpectedly—it leaves a powerful impression on the overwrought and deranged nervous system. You straddle him, knees dug into the couch beneath you, the solid columns of his thighs hard against your soft limbs. Bucky adjusts his hold as his hands slide about your waist, beneath your dress. You gasp desperately, clenching your hands on his shoulders, fingers sinking deep.

Then he lifts one hand, sliding one finger beneath your chin.

Your sensitive skin comes alive to his touch. He tips your face up so that your eyes lock on his with heavy lids, watching flaring passion light your eyes. Sparks of pure innocence and want flashes in the depths as he gently kneads, then sends his fingers of his other hand to glide over your silken back. Desire heightens, needs escalates—and he is in no rush, you are too important to rush—conquering your senses and body is not all that he wants. He wants you forever and even though he doesn’t have the talent of art, he has the one of love.

He takes possession of your lips, your mouth. His hard lips move on your, and you soften, not just your lips, but every muscle. Slow heat washes through your body. When he pulls back, you swallow, and drag in a desperately needed breath. It is all pleasure, simple love—you become softer—he becomes harder, needy. The touch of his eyes, the touch of his hands. Art. As he is savoring you again, the softness of your mouth is his to enjoy, you feel his desire, the hard, throbbing length pressing against your panties. The softness of your thighs pressing firmly on both sides of his legs as you slowly grind against his cock and you can feel him attempting to buck his hips up to meet yours. The tension, pouring off him in waves, eases, just a little. He sighs, and rests his forehead on yours. Your innocence is addictive, entrancing.

Bucky shivers, eyes shut tight―he lets a low, wickedly teasing laugh. “I love you”

His lips brushes your in an inexpressibly tender caress. You kiss him, sliding your hands up, framing his face, so you can let him know―let him feel―your response to his words.

“Are you okay with doing it like this?”he murmurs, his tone deep. You gaze at his eyes, slowly nodding. "Good" The word is a feral purr then his hand slid lower, to lightly caress, with just the barest touch, the sensitive skin, moving the panties aside and rubbing his fingers along your folds, stroking and sliding slowly into you. Sweet pleasure washes through you, making you moan softly. His thumb presses your clit, moving in slow circles as two fingers slide deeper, finding the spot that makes you tremble. There it is.

“I want you inside me, please” The smile on his face, curving those fascinating lips―you are flushed yet so bold with words. He withdraws his fingers. You lift your hips as he tugs and shifts them until he is aligned, but you don’t wait as you sink on his cock to the hilt. A muffled groan escapes your lips as his length stretches your walls and you move your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, rocking slowly onto his cock, the head of it hitting your deepest places. Bucky’s hands travel to massage your breast, eliciting unexpected loud moans from you. His eyes locked on your face. “Don’t slow don’t, keep on riding me”

He states, his voice very low, it sends a most peculiar thrill through you, he grabs at your hips, impatiently thrusts up hard into your core, urging you to continue. The sound of skin slapping against skin echoes around the small studio as you keep the moderate pace.

“I will come, Bucky” You keep on hitting your cervix as your trusts become harder, your nubile breasts swing with the force of your body rocking. An impossible pleasure goes through you, cumming violently, your throbbing walls milking his cock as he keeps on trusting through your orgasm, moaning before filling you up with his cum.

“I think that sex is a form of art” You kiss him long and soft, and when you pull yourself away, you touch his mouth with your fingers. “I suggest you not to think more, Bucky”

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x you #bucky imagine #college!bucky #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #request #bucky smut #bucky barnes smut

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loveisanimaginarydagger3000 · 2 months ago

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The Soldier Of Death (7)- Recruitment

Natasha Romanoff X Super Soldier Reader 18+

Summary: Soldat Smerti. The Soldier of Death. You were the perfect weapon: loyal, obedient, and merciless, or so Hydra thought. What happens when these traits are put to the test? Your captivity in the Avenger's tower and the presence of a redhead makes you realise you didn't have to be a monster. The question was though; Did Hydra make you the monster or were you always one?

This fic will contains dark themes. Please read these warnings before starting any of these chapters: graphic descriptions of murder, violence, gore and torture, heavy angst, mental issues.

Please consider these warnings before reading

Word Count: 2.7k

General Masterlist | The Soldier Of Death Masterlist

Chapter Warning: Dark thoughts, anxiety, brief reference to torture

—

"You wanted to see me?" Natasha says as she strolls into Nick's office, him requesting her presence as soon as possible. The redhead ditched the mission reports she was doing to come and see the Director, having a feeling this was something far more important.

"How are things progressing with our Soldat Smerti?" he asks as his eye is trained on her, his expression blank as he doesn't want to give away his ideas. Natasha also keeps her face stoic as for some reason the name he called you bothered her, did he not see that your name was Y/n on the file she submitted?

"She's open to talking more, still very hesitant and cautious but that's understandable for someone who's been institutionalised for a large amount of time, especially someone who was maltreated," Natasha replies, having spent more time with you over the last couple of weeks, still delivering your food but also trying to get you to talk more, expressing how you weren't going to be hurt here.

"You have taken a liking to her," he says, a little out of nowhere, catching the redhead by surprise. "You would have made your assessment by now but you seem to be waiting for something," her jaw clenches subtly, not liking how somehow this man was always able to have some sort of read on her. "What are you waiting for?"

"She wants to accept our offer," Natasha answers honestly, the man's smile sneaking onto his lips as his own plans were falling into place, the assassin unaware of his ideas. "She's just scared."

"Do you think she could be an Avenger?" He asks and she pauses for a moment, thinking carefully about his question. She could see that same glint in your eyes that she had when she was first rescued from the red room, that hopeful glint that you would be able to be more than what they made you, but at the same time the fear of betrayal hovering at the back of your mind.

"In time, yes," Fury moves to stand from his chair, moving to lean against the front of his desk while Natasha stands in front of him, her arms crossing over her chest as the man ponders for a moment.

"Why are you so sure about her?" Natasha watches the man's curious gaze, his hands resting against the wooden desk as the redhead responds to her boss.

"When Clint didn't take his shot against me in Budapest, he told me that he had this gut feeling about me, that I could be more than what they made me," Fury listens with interest at Natasha's words, remembering the mixed emotions he felt that day when Clint disobeyed his orders but helped saved what would soon become one of his most valuable agents. "I have this same feeling about her," she confesses and the man knows not to take this lightly, the Russian never letting her emotions affect her work, renowned for her professionalism.

The room lingers in silence for a moment, both figures letting the weight of the situation settle before Fury speaks up, a plan having formed in his head.

"Talk to the team about her being potentially recruited, see what they make of it," he says and Natasha is a bit suspicious as to why she was doing it, Fury normally taking the lead on these types of situations.

"What are you going to do?" she asks and he just chuckles at her scepticism.

"I'm going to talk her into accepting our offer," he says, the smile now visible on his lips as he sees the small one tugging at the redhead's lips, "See you soon Romanoff."

***

"He wants to do what?" Steve's tone laced with disbelief as he braces his arms on the kitchen island, having just finished making a smoothie after his morning run.

"He wants us to give her a chance," Natasha answers, the super soldier letting out a sigh before taking a large sip of his drink, the rest of the team gathered in various places around the common room, listening in to the conversation.

They were all up to date about you, brief knowledge of your past and known abilities being sent to them all in your file once you were brought back into the base and put in the glass cell. They knew you were powerful and loyal, so the question was would you be able to betray Hydra and trust them.

"Why should we do that? She's done nothing to prove she won't just try and kill us all," Steve says, still bitter about the pain in his side, multiple ribs having been broken during the last encounter with you, the moment where you almost decapitated him also being added to the list as to why he wasn't fond of you. "She's powerful and dangerous," he says, caution in his tone as he tries to get his point across, "She's also clearly not in control."

"She needs our help," Wanda cuts in, taking a few by surprise as she tended to stay quiet during conversations like this, only speaking once someone asked her opinion. "We can help her, that's what we do right? As Avengers?" Her words settle in a few, Natasha smiling at the brunette woman and nodding her head subtly in appreciation.

"I can't believe I'm going to say this," Tony says, finally speaking up which was unlike his character, normally first to voice his opinion in literally anything. "I agree partly with the old man," he says, earning a disapproving look from Steve at the nickname, "We can't be sure it's safe. Statistically, the chances of her losing control or hurting one of us is extremely high."

"See someone who agrees-" Steve tries to say, being cut off by the billionaire.

"I haven't finished Capsicle," he says, a mocking smile on his lip at the other nickname he called Steve who just glared at the man. "But since when has anything we have done been safe?"

"That's because of you Tony," Steve mutters, "You're the one who always puts us in these situations,"

"Last I recall, you were the one who wanted an ex-hydra brainwashed murderer to join our team, what's different about this one?" Steve's jaw visibly clenches at Tony's description of Bucky, the brown haired man making a valid point though. You were extremely similar to Bucky, if they could help him, why couldn't they help you?

"Bucky's different," he grits out, defending his best friend while everyone else in the room notices the tension rising in the atmosphere. "I know him."

"Knew," corrects Tony, "You knew him, Hydra changed him."

"This isn't about Bucky," Natasha cuts in, not wanting a proper fight to break out between the two, the billionaire lacking the care of stepping too far over the line, Steve being far too defensive about his friend. "Look at the facts, yes she's hydra but how many of us here have a past we want to forget, we want to put behind us? She's no different to some of you when you first joined, so why should we put that against her?"

Everyone listens as Natasha takes control of the room, Clint hiding a smile at his best friend and noticing this was her moment with you. She wasn't taking her shot with you just as he did her.

"As Steve said, she's powerful, we need that if we want to stop Hydra and any other threats."

"Since when did you do the speeches Romanoff," teases Tony, already making his mind up about his stance on your potential recruitment to the team. "How about we have a vote?" he says, using his typical cocky voice to get the other's opinion, "Who thinks Y/n should join?"

In his usual manner, Tony playfully raises his arm, making a show of himself before looking around the room to see who else agrees. Wanda raises her arm up shyly, Natasha doing so more confidently, just not as dramatically as the billionaire, Clint also raising his hand up as he trusts Natasha's gut feeling about you, the rest of those in the room, being Steve, Bruce and Vision, Sam and Thor currently not available, keeping theirs down.

Steve goes to protest, but the sounds of footsteps can be heard, interrupting the conversation.

"Well, I'm glad the vote went in our favour," Fury says as he strides into the room with authority, the room going quiet as they see you standing by his side, face stoic to mask your nerves.

Everything was so loud, the electricity buzzing around the room, the tv playing in the corner, the sounds of fists clenching, bodies tensing, hearts starting to race, it was all too loud. It was overwhelming. Steve's heart in particular started to pound against his rib cage, the memories of your last encounter causing him to be tense and on edge, your gaze meeting his blue for a split second before flickering away.

They think we're a monster. They're scared and they should be.

Taunts the darkness, your mask slipping for a second, showing a brief sense of doubt behind your eyes before your face returns to being stoic, mind fighting the gnawing corruption and forcing it to be silent.

"Meet Y/n, your new teammate," Fury says nonchalantly but also in a tone that leaves no room for argument, a few shocked faces as Natasha said potential teammate, not someone who would be joining instantly.

"Fury..." Steve's voice dies out with the glare sent his way, your eyes fixated on the view out of the window, everything else seeming to fade away.

The compound overlooked acres and acres of field and forest, the sun gently shining down onto the grass causing it to look vibrant, the simple sight of nature almost a phenomenon to you. Too busy staring out of the window, you miss the small smile that creeps up on Natasha's face, Fury going to have a private word with a few of the team while you slowly made your way towards the windows.

You could feel a few people staring at you, your mind trying to stop the racing thoughts and focus on calming down, not wanting to have some sort of panic attack from all the attention on you. You had to block out the incessant heartbeats, the signs of their fear and tried to focus on the steady one nearby. Only once you turned your head did you realise that it was Natasha who was calm, casually walking up to you as you turned your head back to admire the view.

"It's beautiful," you whisper, not used to having such a clear view of outside your surroundings. You were used to concrete walls surrounding you, or even glass ones in a secure room, not the large windows that practically filled the entire wall, displaying the wonders of the outside world.

"It is," she murmurs back, turning her gaze from you to back outside. The others watched from the distance as you two stood near the window, Natasha talking to you while you made sure to memorise every detail you possibly could about the view. "What made you accept the offer?" she asks, curious as to what Fury must have said to you to get you to finally accept it, her emerald eyes scanning over your relaxing features.

Before you can reply, the sound of Steve's voice becoming louder interrupts the moment, Fury's stare hardening at the super soldier.

"This is going to go wrong, it isn't the right move," he says in warning before grabbing his smoothie and leaving the room, shaking his head as he enters the elevator, "I thought we did things as a team Fury, made decisions together."

"You did and you were outvoted," Fury replies and Steve just scoffs at the idea they were using a random voting method to decide your place on the team. He doesn't bother arguing back, letting the doors shut, Fury dismissing everyone and asking for you to join him in the kitchen, away from everyone.

"Remember our deal," he says, tone serious as he addresses you, "Any indication that you're not being honest with us, and you're straight back in a cell, don't make me have to do that Soldier." You nod in understanding, eyes flickering over to a glass on the table, your reflection staring back at you.

What have you done? This was a trap.

Get us out now. If you don't do it, I will. I won't be merciful.

The darkness claws at your mind, your stare going blank for a second as Fury continues to talk to you. The man notices how you seem to grow distant for a second, blinking before returning your attention towards him.

"I will leave you to adjust to everything," he says, catching the nervousness in your eyes and assuming it was from the new environment, not your broken mind. He knows it will be hard to adjust, but he has faith in the rest of the team to help you, especially after the talk he just gave them.

With Fury gone, you're left to sit alone, basking in your thoughts as Natasha holds back with Wanda, watching how the witch seems to be able to hear some of your thoughts while also keeping an eye on you, reading your body language.

Your leg bounces steadily, fingers gripping the glass a little too tight, her brows furrowing at how anxious you seem, never having showed signs like this when you were with her in the cell.

They're always going to be scared of the Soldat.

They sneer, your fingers loosening around the glass as you can feel it straining, about to shatter, the darkness laughing at the close call of losing control already.

You're going to snap. Lose control. This will all be for nothing because I will get out. I will get out and do what needs to be done.

You remain quiet, not in the position to be able to snap back at the darkness, letting them taunt and tease you, trying to get you to lose your composure. You had to learn how to deal with them, how to keep them under control, otherwise they were right. You would snap.

I can't wait to watch the life drain from their eyes, to watch them suffer.

Your jaw clenches painfully, their words purposely trying to rile you up, to prove Steve right that you were dangerous, but you don't react as Natasha comes to sit next to you. She sees straight through the small smile you send her way, Wanda having quietly told her that your static-like mind was growing louder and you needed some sort of distraction, and decides to inform you of the plan for the rest of the day, Fury having told her before he left.

"You've got a busy day ahead of you," she teases softly, emerald eyes matching her tone as she watches you fight yourself internally, your gaze eventually turning to meet her gentle one. "I'll show you around the compound first, then it's medical tests quickly and then showcasing your skills so we have a better understanding of your abilities, is that alright?"

"Medicals?" you say, hesitation evident in your eyes, Natasha's gaze going to your fingers , how they subconsciously trace your veins where you were most likely tested on before.

You can remember the agony you felt from all the injections they forced into you, the searing pain that felt like it was burning you from the insides, test after test, torture after torture, you didn't want to go through that again.

"We just check your vitals to make sure you're healthy," she explains, still watching how your fingers moved to trace a scar instead, your mind still processing something.

"Would I be alone?"

"I'll be there with you," her tone reassuring, the redhead noticing how you visibly relax, hands dropping to your sides to rest. "Now come on, we've got an entire compound to go around," she says with a playful smile, standing up from the chair and motioning for you to follow her, ready to give you a tour of hopefully your new home.

#marvel fanfiction #natasha fanfic #natasha romanoff fanart #natasha #natasha romanov #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fanfiction #natasha romanoff #black widow x reader #black widow #super soldier reader #tw torture

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mrsbuckybarnes1917 · 4 months ago

Text

4: DAYBREAK

Chapter 3 <MASTERLIST > Chapter 5

SUMMARY: Even the Winter Solider needs to recover and recuperate and it gives you the opportunity to discover that there is a man behind the Asset.

Word Count: 4.2k

Warning: SMUT: PinV, unprotected intercourse, creampie — If there is any more you find not listed here please be sure to let me know so I can add it.

There were times when the higher powers of HYDRA took pity on their soldier, giving him time outside of cryostasis. Maybe it was kindness, but you were convinced that it was a reluctant act to protect the welfare of their most prized asset. Allowing the assassin time outside the chamber to refuel and regenerate his body. You had been given instruction to watch the asset, ensure he was fed and monitor for signs of ailments and malady. Karpov had no concerns regarding your physical safety, interested only about preserving his precious weapon. Not once did he contemplate the soldat’s mentality.

You were there when he rose from a fitful slumber at the crack of dawn. It seemed as though his body had forgotten how to access the deeper levels of sleep. He focused his gaze on you as you entered the room, watching as you placed a tray of food on a small table across from him. He seemed different, more present, as though the natural REM cycle of sleep had restored something of himself. However, it didn't seem to have cured his issue of staring, his eyes unblinking as they stayed fixed on you.

As he stared, you noticed more details about his face, the small scars on his cheek that you hadn't noticed before. The way his eyes gleamed in the light was haunting. He seemed like a different person, his focus wasn't as intense or as intimidating. The soldier seemed calmer, more relaxed.

He stood up from the hard wooden frame which had been installed against the wall, fixed to avoid it being used as a weapon against his captors. His eyes darted between you and the door and for a moment you wondered if he was pondering escape. If he was, you were no match for him physically, except for the power of speech. You waited for a reaction, but none came. Only then was it that you realized that he was checking for the presence of others.

“It's just me,” you said in Russian. “Dobroye utro.” (Good morning.)

He blinked, surprised by your use of Russian.

To your amazement, he smiled. “You speak Russian,” he observed.

"Just practicing a few words. Was it that bad?” You blushed, taken aback by his interaction. It wasn’t as though he hadn’t heard you use Russian words before. Did he remember your previous interactions?

He shook his head. “No… no, it was good.”

The way he was staring at you, you could tell he was telling the truth. Did he have the ability to lie? You were surprised by the normality of his speech.

"How... how’re you feeling?"

This might be the first conversation you'd had with the soldier. It felt strange, since you had seen each other naked now.

He looked down for a moment and when he looked back up at you, he seemed a little sad. He shook his head a little. "I'm fine... just wondering why you are being so nice... is this to trick me, like one of HYDRA's games?”

“Game? No game.” You shook your head. “Just doing my job.”

He paused for a moment, his thoughts seemed sluggish and his words slow to form. “Why do you talk to me in Russian? It’s… forbidden. Only the handlers speak to me in Russian.”

“You didn't have any problem speaking to me in Russian last night.”

A hint of a smile graced his lips, and let out a breathy sigh.

“Last night was… really good.”

“You’re a lot more talkative this morning.”

“I had a good night…" He took a step closer to you, his eyes never shifting from yours.

“Oh really?”

“Really.”

He moved in close, his face just inches from your, his perfect pink lips before your eyes, ripe for the capture. His hands gripped your hips, holding you in place. Anticipation swirled through you, your breath catching as you waited for his next move. A small, confident smile played on his lips as he leaned in even closer. He was close enough to kiss, his hands resting firmly on your hips as he held your gaze. The intensity of his stare left no doubt about his intentions - he was going to take your lips, and there was no hesitation in his mind. Your body buzzed excitedly, your heart pounding, desperate for his kiss.

"Wh-what’re you doing?" you asked, knowing full well what he wanted, you wanted it too.

You closed your eyes. When his lips finally met yours, the kiss was fierce, filled with unbridled passion and desire. It was as though you'd unlocked something that had lain dormant inside him for years. His lips move with yours, his metal hand wrapped around your waist, the other one coming up to your neck, pulling you even closer to him. You felt the firmness and warmth of his chest as he held you close. Of all the things you had shared with him in the short time you'd known him, this was the most intimate.

You felt a sense of power in this moment, a sense of comfort, he was giving you something that he had never given anyone else. His hands moved down to your backside as the kiss grew more intense, and you could feel his heart thumping in his chest. You placed your hands on his pecs, free from its usual protective leather, his finely chiseled chest felt solid under your touch.

There was something about the forbidden nature of your relationship that was thrilling, the danger of your actions, the uncertainty of the Soldat’s intentions, the unpredictability of his behavior had awakened a salacious beast inside you and it was hungry for the man before you. His hands squeezed your back and broke away from the kiss, taking a few ragged breaths, before pulling you up against his body again. His breathing was heavy and his eyes were shut tight, almost as though you would disappear if he dared open them. He held you for a few moments in his grip as he leant close and whispered in your ear.

"Your lips are... addictive.”

“Is that why you kissed me?” you asked.

“No, I wanted to know what you tasted like.”

“What do I taste like?”

“Kak moy.” (Like mine.)

You blushed, grazing your teeth over your plump lower lip, trying to hide your smile. He kissed your neck, moving to your earlobe, kissing and nibbling. He murmured something against your ear, so low that you almost missed his words.

“You drive me... insane…”

“And you're going to get us both into trouble.”

There was a playful edge to your voice, he couldn’t deny that he loved the danger. “I'm afraid I'm willing to take that risk... with you…”

His words had your whole body on fire. And you noticed how different he was from his normally stoic demeanor. The passion that burned inside of him seemed to be overflowing, he seemed more wild here than you’d ever seen him. And the more you watched him in this state, the more you wanted him. His hands gripped you tighter as he pulled you in, not letting a moment pass that he wasn't touching you. His voice came out in a soft murmur, low and barely audible.

“God... just touching you, your skin... I can't get enough. You make me feel alive for the first time in my life.”

All you could do was close your eyes, the feeling of his touch, the way he spoke to you and the desperation behind his words made your whole body tingle. It felt like he only needed you, you felt wanted, not as something to possess, to control but to love. His lips were on your neck, slowly making their way to your earlobe, your body was on fire, your heart was ready to explode out of your chest. This was something that felt so right, but also felt forbidden for him, to feel and to want. Your lips found his again as you kissed him passionately.

The man who was usually so strong and rigid couldn't keep himself from you, he clung to you as if you were the only thing keeping him grounded, he was mesmerized by the sheer passion of the moment.

Something felt different about him and you found it more thrilling than before. Your soldier was finally waking up and losing all control. He had no care for anything that might threaten the two of you, all he cared about was holding and kissing you. He was consumed by the fever that had taken hold of his body, blood pumping like crazy, heart pounding so hard you could feel it throbbing as his hands squeezed your body tightly to him.

“What do you want from me?” you asked, breathlessly.

He paused for a moment, breathing heavily. “You.” His whole world was centered around keeping you close

“Why? Why me?”

He kissed your neck again, whispering in a soft voice. “God I don't know... you just… there's something about you... something that drives me... I don't know how to explain it.”

“You're not what I thought you would be.”

He pulled his lips off your neck for a few seconds to answer you. “What... did you think I would be?”

You shrugged. “Cold.”

“Maybe I am… except with you.”

His flesh palm felt like a blazing furnace against your waist but there was a tenderness to his touch that you hadn't anticipated. If anything, the soldier had the ability to take what he wanted. You didn't stand a chance against him physically but you knew you had the real power here. You couldn't help but kiss him back, melting into his arms. You found yourself wrapping yourself around his neck, relishing in how his hard body felt against yours. His grip around you tightened, holding you so close, like he was afraid he might lose you. You were his anchor. A connection to a reality he lost touch with so long ago but this time he couldn’t… wouldn’t let go. He wouldn’t fall again.

He kissed you hard, like he couldn’t get enough. Every touch was to commit you to his memory. It sent a shudder running down his spine and his body almost trembled. The loss of control he felt in this moment was completely different to the emptiness that washed over him when Karpov recited those dreaded words. Soldat welcomed the helplessness that his body experienced with you and he was deeply aroused by the idea of surrendering himself to you. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't keep his hands off you, the way you felt in his arms was intoxicating. As you wrapped your legs around his waist, his embrace lifted you clean off the floor. You were his lifeline, his connection to the living world.

His hands were all over you, pushing you down on the bed, delving under your clothes, pawing at your skin like a starved creature. His roughness, his loss of reserve should have frightened you. Truth be told, the whole situation scared you a little. You had never dreamed that this man, this empty tin soldier was capable of such primal passion. But despite your fear, it excited you. He was unlike anyone you’d ever met before, there was a fire burning inside him that lit up his eyes. There was no limit to how far he would go, he had no control and no desire to hold back, every touch had meaning, every kiss had power, his body weighed you down but he pulled you to himself, it's almost as if he was trying to consume you into his body.

There was a certain edge to his actions that were almost desperate, he wanted you so badly that nothing else in your life seemed to matter in that moment. His fingers balled into fists in the thin material of your freshly pressed jumpsuit, and looking directly into your eyes he tore it off your supple frame. The sound of ripping fabric made you shudder with desire and shiver as the cold Siberian air assaulted your uncovered skin.

“Kotyonok,” he hummed into your mouth as he brought one hand between your thighs. Nimble fingers danced over your sensitive flesh, all the while continuing his ministrations with his perfect mouth, tasting your skin. The whimpering moans that tumbled from your lips were out of your control, as was the rest of your body, your clasp on his hair tightening and your pelvis lifting into his covered erection. Instinctively, your legs opened, knees dropping to the side, giving him full access to your core.

You were completely powerless in his arms. He had stripped you down to nothing but his fingers were still caressing your skin, there was a certain kind of urgency as if he knew the two of you wouldn't be able to enjoy this for long. He was devouring your body with his eyes, taking in every small detail that he ignored before, even a tiny scar from your childhood that he never paid attention to previously seemed like an important discovery. He pushed between your legs slowly and carefully, his touch was light as if he was scared to hurt you. Your toes gripped into the sheets as a soft moan escaped your lips.

He let out a small groan as you brushed against him, the sensation nearly sending him over the edge, his breathing shallow and raspy. The way he was grabbing you and holding onto you, you could feel his whole body throb, the fire inside him burning hotter than ever.

“Please.” The plea fell from your lips involuntarily.

Winter froze for a moment, just to look at you. To marvel at the fact of your existence in his life. You were spread bare and unbound just for him, exposed nipples hardening into perfect peaks in the Siberian air, your bra having been quickly shed. Your knees were hooked around his hips, and you dared to meet his eyes, half-lidded and dark with desire. For some reason you trusted him and he found it exhilarating. He ran his finger tips between your breasts, over the curve of your belly, watching closely as you closed your eyes and arched up into his touch with a whine of unadulterated pleasure. His flesh hand pulled apart your clothing further and for a brief moment, you wondered how you would explain your attire to Karpov. The moment was very brief, as your soldier pulled aside the thin swatch of fabric of your soaked cotton panties. The warm scent of your arousal drew him in like a moth to a flame. You were irresistible.

“Tak milo.” (So sweet) He popped his index finger into his mouth, sucking on it like a lollipop, twisting his tongue around it, relishing in your flavor. He needed you, he wanted to taste you so badly, but there wasn’t time. Soldat swiped his fingers across your drenched pussy, collecting the outcome of your arousal before pushing his hands into his pants and coating his rising cock with your essence.

Boldy, you pushed aside his hands and eagerly unbuttoned his pants, spurred on by the salacious smile encouraging your actions. He reveled in the way you took charge as you pulled down his pants and his massive erection sprung free. You gasped. Was it bigger than you remembered? Or was just being at eye level with his cock making you feel small in comparison? But HYDRA had not raised you to shy away from anything, even something as insurmountable as Soldat’s soldier. You licked your lips with the intent of taking him into your mouth, but you were distracted by a faraway noise.

Your startle didn’t go unnoticed.

“Smena karaula,” (Guard change) he reassured you. “The guards.”

You had noticed the guards as you’d entered the wing but they seemed so far away, but the distant clacking of their shoes reminded you of the risk you were taking.

“Don’t worry, they are leaving.” He followed your gaze, tilting his head and listening intently.

“How do you know?”

“They always sound that way during the change.”

“You sure?”

“Da. Ne volnuysya, Kotyonok. Ya pozabochus' o tebe.” (Yes. Don't worry, Kitten. I will take care of you.)

You frowned in confusion at his words. “Maybe we shouldn’t.” Despite your fear, or maybe because of your fear, your pussy throbbed impatiently. Were you getting off on the risk of getting caught? Were you so enthralled by your soldier that you would risk your life just to have him?

The sound of approaching footsteps didn't matter to you, it might have mattered before, but the touch of Winter gave you this overwhelming feeling of being wanted. Something about him brought out your inner wild side, something about him made you want to take risks you'd regret later. The heat was rising between you both just from being close, your eyes locked onto his. Winter gave you that sense of safety and security, like you could be yourself and not have to worry about anything, just enjoy this moment.

“Kotyonok?” He leaned down to capture your lips in a searing kiss.

Did the assassin have the ability to kiss away your fear? His hands roamed over your body, stoking the fire within you, threatening to consume you both, burning away all thought of the threat that loomed nearby. His lips dulled your thoughts and instinctively you reached out to touch him. Soldat let out a shuddering moan as you wrapped your fingers around him.

“Feel good?” you asked, tilting your head.

He licked his lips, hooded eyes opening to look at you before fluttering back closed as you pressed your thumb harder against his tip.

“I asked you a question, Soldat.” You used your other hand to grip his chin gently.

“Da, fuck yes. Feels so .. s-so good, tak khorosho.” His voice became deeper, trailing away from him the more he talked. His words faded into nothing but loud moans.

You couldn’t believe how alive he looked, his skin flushed and his eyes dark. You’d always considered him handsome, but for the first time, you thought he looked so fucking pretty, as he came undone on top of you. His matted hair was stuck to his forehead as sweat glistened all over him. The intensity of his touch, the passion in his eyes both spoke of a man who had known pain and loneliness, but who had found solace in your arms.

Your breathing was erratic, you moaned brazenly as his cock slid through your fingers. You wanted him, despite the danger, despite his magnitude you relished the challenge. You glanced at the door, but his titanium digits were quick to guide your face back towards him.

“Ya sobirayus' sdelat' tebya svoyey.” (I'm going to make you mine)

Your eyes were locked on his, you couldn't look away. You didn't want to look away. His kisses and the sensations they brought had your body shaking, his fingers wrapped around your waist, holding you tight, his other hand was gripping your thigh. His touch was intense, and he was being bold, something he'd never been before. Each touch of his seemed to push you closer and closer to the edge of insanity. The risk of someone walking through that door and finding you both was nothing compared to the pleasure of just letting go and submitting yourself to his desire.

“Inside me,” you demanded, spreading yourself open to him. “Now, I need you now.”

“Da, Kotyonok.” He kissed you again and you can feel him up against you, firm and warm.

The tip of his shaft teased you, taking a moment to slide over you, brushing against every part of you that was aching.

“Vy zadayete temp. YA v tvoyem rasporyazhenii. (You set the pace. I'm yours to control.) I'm yours.” He grabbed your arms and rolled you on top of him.

You slid your swollen lips along him for a few moments, savoring his heat and the way his cock pulsed against you. Every now and again his tip grazed your clit until you wanted to beg him to fill you up, until you’re almost cumming from the briefest of contact.

“Ne drazni menya, Kotyonok.” (Don’t tease me, Kitten.) His hand settled on your hips. “Should I beg?”

You were loving having your way with him, and he let you, as long as it involved him somehow. The feeling of his tip rubbing against you sent shivers up and down your spine and had your eyes drifting shut. The feeling of being on top of him, the dominant position over him just heightened the pleasure you were feeling. You didn't want him to beg for you, although if he did, you'd do anything he told you to do. Your mouth opened to speak as you felt his finger tips touch your waist and your clit.

“Ty takaya chuvstvitel'naya, Kotyonok, moya krasotka.” (You’re so sensitive, Kitten, my pretty girl.)

In that moment, the way he said those words made you melt inside. You still didn't understand Russian, but you understood him. A soft moan escaped your lips as your eyes opened only to meet his once again. The intensity of his touch was more than you could bear but you needed it more and more, the deeper into it you went. Your breath was quickening, you were losing all control.

“Tebe nravitsya, kogda ya prikasayus' k tebe zdes'?” (You like when I touch you here?)

You nodded, your eyes drifting closed as the pleasure became overwhelming, you were already at the edge and he knew it, and so did you. You were breathing heavily, your body throbbing from the rush of his hands sliding up and down your body. He kept his hand at your waist, your hip bones pressing into his hand giving him all the control he needed. Your body was coiling, his touch was like an addiction, the more you got the more you needed.

“More? Please?” His voice came out in a whisper, using English for once, moaning as you took him deeper. He wanted to feel your pussy wrapped tightly around him so badly, he wanted you to squeeze his cock until he was completely empty. “Pozhaluysta, Kotyonok (Please, Kitten). I want to be inside you.”

Your eyes flared open when you heard those words, there was something in his voice, a hint of desperation that made you weak. Every inch of you was begging for it. You leaned down to kiss him while your legs straddled him firmly, while his hands moved to maneuver your hips. Your hand guided him to where he needed to be, his palm came to rest on yours, helping you, making the movement more erotic, more intimate.

Were you really doing this? Were you really fucking the Winter Soldier? His length stretched you until he was filling you completely. A whimper escaped your mouth at the same time an involuntary grunt fell from his. Was this real? You looked into his icy blue eyes for confirmation.

“Ty ne perestaval dumat' obo mne so vcherashnego dnya, ne tak li?” (You haven’t stopped thinking about me since yesterday, have you?)

Your breath caught as you gazed into his eyes, captivated by his magnetic presence. Since your first encounter, he consumed your every thought, his allure bordering on obsession. Your body reacted in kind, the intensity of your desire causing you to moan uncontrollably. His hands gripped your hips, perfectly positioned to command the force and rhythm of your shared movements. Passion and desperation fueled the fervor of his touch.

“Ty menya portish', Kotyonok.” (You’re making a mess on me, Kitten.)

The more he moved, the more you wanted him. The more he took, the more you melted into his body. Your body was throbbing and your heart was racing, and all you had were incoherent noises coming from your mouth. When it got to be too much, you leaned in close to him and spoke.

“Please!” you begged, breathless. “I need you, fill me up, please.”

“Ostorozhno, Kotyonok.” (Careful, Kitten.) He pulled you down towards him, claiming your lips with his, swallowing the volume of your pleasure.

It was so much all at once, a wave of pleasure washed over your entire body and you were shaking. But there was a look in his eyes, a look you could have gotten lost in. The way he pressed his fingers against your lips, the way he begged you to be quiet. His mouth covered yours and all you could hear was his breathing getting heavier. He was so vulnerable with you, so trusting of you. And that thought made you want to scream. He made you lose all control.

It felt like a rush. It was all at once and you were left panting, completely exhausted and utterly speechless. He was still underneath you, his breath was heavy and his eyes were closed. He looked peaceful underneath you, almost like he trusted you to take care of him. In return, he had you.

Chapter 3 <MASTERLIST > Chapter 5

#winter soldier smut #bucky barnes smut #winter soldier x reader #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier fan fiction #bucky barnes fan fiction #winter soldier x you #bucky barnes x you #behind blue eyes

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iwasmadetobeasoldier · 29 days ago

Note

*duck-walking EXTREMELY fast around his apartment*

//okay, I can definitely see that//

..uh, whats that?

#the winter soldier #bucky barnes rp #marvel #Soldat speaks #Soldat answers

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griffin-girl-r · 1 year ago

Text

You're not mine (Part 2)

Created: 10.10.2023

Finished: 15.11.2023

Edited: 15.11.2023

Age: 15

Word count: 2,793

Warnings: Abandonment, Pain

Request: Yes (Wattpad user)

Pairing: WinterWidow

Soldat = Soldier

Part 1 , Part 3

—

"Very good, soldier." A voice interrupted the brief silence that had fallen over the room "You have finally completed your training and you're now ready for a very special mission."

The man stepped forward, allowing himself to get a better view of the subject in front of him in the dimness of the room.

You lift your head, every breath coming out in labored breaths, as you took in the sight of the agent in front of you.

Today's training session has been more intense than any other one, demanding you to overuse your powers.

"And what that might be?" You breathed out, straightening your back

The agent smirked "Oh, I can guarantee that you'll love this mission." He sang

"Then I am ready for any mission the organization has for me." You replied, intrigued by all the mystery of this upcoming mission

"That's what we love to hear." The man declared "Then it's time for you to know the target of your mission."

The agent lifted his hand and held a file up, extending it for you to grab.

"You have all the details here." He declared

You curiously opened the file and peeked at the first page inside of it.

You swallowed the lump that formed in your throat unexpectedly but you tried to maintain your composure as the reality of your actions and the identity of your supposed target settled in.

"I can't." You mumbled, your voice betraying your inner turmoil, as you quickly passed the file back to your boss "This wasn't the deal."

The agent chuckled.

"This was very much the deal, young soldier." He coldly replied "As I can remember, this was the plan you asked our help for."

A shiver ran down your spine and the rhythm of your heartbeat quickened its pace.

"No." You hesitantly shook your head "I said I needed help to take my revenge on her." You explained "Not on all of them. Not on him."

"But why stop there?" The agent raised his eyebrow "Why would you want to take your revenge on just one person when you can take it on all of them?"

"Even if it was true, the others are still my family." You reasoned

"Your family?!" The agent shouted, immediately silencing you "Must I remind you that this so-called family of yours abandoned you, that they threw you away as if you were mere trash?"

"It doesn't matter, Sir." You held your ground "I am not going to kill the Avengers."

You blinked.

The agent grabbed you by your vest with such force that, for a second, you weren't able to process what was happening.

"Listen here, Y/N." The agent mockingly whispered your name "This is HYDRA, not that joke of an agency called S.H.I.E.L.D. you grew up in. Your mission is to kill all of the Avengers, starting with those traitors who are now called Natasha Romanoff and Bucky Barnes. Am I clear?"

"Sir..." You tried to conceal the fear you were feeling, failing miserably "Sir, this went too far. I'm sorry but I can't." You shook your head

A shout was heard and your body collided with the cold floor as the HYDRA agent pushed you with all his force.

"Y/N Yelena Romanova." The agent shouted "You have been ours long before Natalia Romanova decided to play pretend that she can be something she was never meant to be." He hissed "A mother."

You kept your mouth shut, too afraid of saying something that might anger the agent more as he continued speaking.

"She stole you from us, gave you another name, just for you to return on your own will to us and ask us for help to get your revenge on her." He reminded you "We took you in, trained you, gave you powers, all just so you could make her pay and now you dare to reject the opportunity to kill them?!"

"Sir, I just..." You tried to defend yourself

"Shut up!" He ordered "I am going to give you three hours to think about your answer just to show you that we can have some understanding towards our subjects and when I'll summon you back to me, I hope I won't regret giving you a chance."

You nodded "Yes, Sir!"

"Now disappear." He pointed with his head towards the door

You stood up from the ground and dusted your clothes before making your way to your assigned room.

~~~~~

Your heart pounded in your chest as you sniffled your fear away.

This was what you wanted after all.

This was what you needed.

You needed revenge and this was the only way you could achieve your goal.

Machines hummed and buzzed around you but you tried to not mind their noise as you were keeping your calm demeanor as a façade to protect yourself.

"Alright, subject." A man dressed in a white coat looked at you "Are you ready for this?"

You nodded, determination shining in your tired eyes "As ready as I can be. If this will help me prove to my mother that I can be useful too, then hurry up and do it."

"She's ready." Another man's voice was heard from somewhere inside the room but you couldn't tell exactly who spoke as the restrainents that kept you glued to the cold metallic table stoped you from looking

The man with the white coat pressed a few buttons and in a fraction of a second, pain flooded through your body as waves of electricity swirled around you, sending shocks flooding through your body.

Time seemed to stay still as you screamed out in agony out of pure reflex, your body spasming with each shockwave you received.

In that moment, buried memories resurfaced inside your mind.

You remembered the happier times and a pang of sadness weighed heavy on your heart.

But just as the good memories came to the front of your mind, so did the bad ones, reminding you of the true reason why you came to HYDRA for help.

The Avengers hate HYDRA and HYDRA hates the Avengers.

You hoped that by joining and serving the rival organization, you could make Natasha realize how wrong she was for treating you like she did.

You hoped to make them feel betrayed and rejected.

Just as you felt.

Darkness enveloped you, and your weakened body stopped spasming, but one thing remained clear as daylight to you.

You will take your revenge on your family for their betrayal by serving their greatest enemy, HYDRA.

~~~~~

You stared at the cement ceiling of your cell.

Your thirst for revenge was just as present as it was four months ago when you joined HYDRA.

The agent was right.

You wanted to kill the Avengers and make them pay for all of your suffering.

But still, one thing made you hesitate.

You sighed.

A memory of a smiling Tanya came to your mind and you remembered that she was as innocent as you were in this whole ordeal.

She deserved to grow up surrounded by the love of her parents as she has never done anything else other than loving you like her older sister who you actually were.

Then you thought of Bucky and the last memory you shared with him.

That fateful night, he had bought you a journal, hoping that it would help you manage your feelings better if you wrote them on the paper.

Comparing him to Natasha now, you realize that he was more of a parent to you than Natasha ever was.

How are you supposed to kill him?

Your door burst open and a security agent, who is in charge of maintaining order, walked inside your room.

"The boss calls you to him." He announced in a bored voice

You nodded "Tell him I am coming."

You stepped in the silence of the private office, allowing your senses to highen, as your eyes darted aimlessly around the room.

"I have been waiting for you." The voice of the man who had been in charge of your training was heard "Welcome!"

"I would thank you, Sir." You put your hands behind your back "But here doesn't exist such thing as being welcomed anywhere."

The man laughed.

"I see you learned the lesson." He smiled pleased "I hope you bring good news to me."

You kept quiet for a few moments, searching for a way to put your decision into words in such a way that HYDRA wouldn't decapitate you in a matter of seconds.

"So?" The man asked again, impatient

"Sir..." You began, taking your time to form every word that came out of your mouth "I am forever grateful for the chance you offered me and the resources you put at my disposal to achieve my ambitions."

The man slightly smiled, knowing that he had won.

"The Avengers have done me so many wrongdoings that I lost count of them." You continued "And after the time I have been granted to carefully choose the course I want for the next events to take, I came with the answer."

The man in front of you leaned backward in his chair, his body visibly relaxed as he waited for your final decision.

"I will..." You took a deep breath, steeling yourself "Not kill the Avengers, Sir. I am sorry, but I can't. They're my family no matter what."

The HYDRA agent shot up from his chair as his eyes went wide with shock.

"What did you say?!" He shouted, completely taken by surprise by your decision

"I said that I will not kill the Avengers." You repeated "I meant it when I said that everything has gone too far, Sir. Yes, I did want to take revenge on them, specifically my mother, but killing them was never my intention. All I wanted was to make them feel betrayed and hurt by becoming a HYDRA agent. Nothing more, nothing less."

"You foolish, lab rat!" The man sneered and pointed his finger at you "We created you! If you're here today it is all thanks to us! Our scientists were the ones who were in charge of creating you out of almost nothing! Now you dare defy us? You have the audacity to bite the hand that fed you?"

You looked around the room, trying to avoid the man's furious gaze.

"Please understand, Sir." You tried to reason "My heart and conscience don't let me murder the persons that saved me from hell and I realized that I made a mistake to return to the hell from where I've been rescued all these years ago."

The man calmly hummed "Hmm, so that's what you call it? A mistake?"

You braced yourself for what could happen next as you watched the man wave his hand at the shadows behind his back.

"I would call it a blessing." He said "You returned where you belong. To your true family and if your feelings stop you from taking action against your kidnappers, then we will help you gather the courage you need."

You shook your head, understanding what the agent's words meant.

"No..." You breathed out fearfully

But it was already too late.

Tanya sat on the carpet placed in the middle of the living room, playing with her toys, as she tried to distract herself from all the yelling that was happening in her surroundings.

"I am tired of your ignorance!" Bucky shouted at his wife, after he came back from another failed search mission where he tried to find you

"I haven't done anything wrong!" Natasha yelled back, her brain blocked in a phase of denial

"You did!" Bucky shouted "You did! You drove our child away! How could you do something like this, Natasha?!"

Natasha froze in place as her shoulders fell down.

She couldn't believe what she just heard Bucky say.

She refused to believe it.

"Natasha?" The woman asked hurt "Since when I am 'Natasha' for you?"

"Ever since Y/N went missing because of your recklessness and pride." Bucky shouted "My Natalia would have never done that to her own child. So, therefore, you are not my Natalia. You are not that girl I dreamed of having a family with."

"James, please." Natasha whispered, tears forming in her eyes "I am still the same Natalia you met so long ago."

Natasha reached to grab Bucky's hand but he pulled it away.

"Don't touch me." He said in a raised tone

Natasha sighed disappointed and nodded, pulling her hands back.

"You're mad." Natasha said "I get it."

"Mad is far from how I feel right now, Natasha." Bucky lowered his tone "I feel desperate because I am unable to find the child that has been entrusted in my protection and who knows where she is right now and what happened to her. She's just a child. You are the only one who failed to see this."

"James, just give me the chance to explain myself." Natasha pleaded "I beg you."

Bucky shook his head.

"I don't know what you have done to my Natalia but you are not the girl that made me remember how it feels to be human again." The man took a few steps backward before rushing out of the room, leaving his wife behind

Natasha fell on the couch, letting out a deep sigh, as she placed her head in her hands.

Tanya, that have been silently observing the argument between her parents, stood up, her toys forgotten on the soft carpet as she walked towards her mother.

"Mama?" Tanya cautiously called her mother

"What is it, baby?" Natasha sniffed, raising her head to look at her daughter

"Why hasn't Y/N come back yet?" Tanya innocently asked, still struggling to grasp the complexity of the situation "Is she still mad at us?"

Natasha thought about how to explain to a 5-year-old what was happening.

"I think she still is, Tatiana." Natasha lifted Tanya and sat her on her lap

"And Papa is sad because he couldn't find my sister, isn't he?" The little girl questioned sadly

Natasha guiltly nodded "Yes, sweetheart. That's why Mama and Papa are fighting."

Little Tanya looked down at her lap, her tiny eyebrows furrowing, as her mind tried to put her feelings into words.

Natasha gave Tanya time to speak at her own pace, not rushing her.

After a few minutes, Tanya looked up again at Natasha with eyes filled with tears.

"But Mama..." Tanya's high-pitched voice trembled "Why did you make Y/N go away? She is my sister. You never get mad at me cause I am your baby but Y/N is your baby too and you made her feel very sad. You always made her cry and I miss playing with her. She's the best big sister in the whole world."

A stray tear fell down Natasha's left cheek.

"Can you bring Y/N back home, Mama?" Tanya sniffed "Can you not get mad at her always? If Tanya is Mama's baby, then Y/N is Mama's baby too."

"I'm not sure, baby girl." Natasha let out a shaky breath, realizing her mistake "Mama messed up big time when she scolded Y/N/N."

"I know that Mama did bad." Tanya said "But Y/N is ours and she's my sister. She needs to live here with us."

"And she will, baby." Natasha said determined "I promise she will."

Tanya snuggled closer to Natasha's chest and sighed contently.

"I love you, Tanya." Natasha quietly declared

Tanya kissed Natasha's cheek before she quickly stood up and ran upstairs to her room.

Natasha stared at the open door that Tanya just walked out through, deeply lost in thoughts.

Her talk with Tanya had helped Natasha realize one important thing.

That Y/N was her baby no matter what and that she had made the biggest mistake in her life by doing what she did to Y/N.

And yet one question remains.

Where is Y/N?

"Soldat!" A voice said "Your orders are to kill the Avengers, our greatest enemies, and I want the heads of the traitors known as Natasha Romanoff and Bucky Barnes."

The man looked at the masked soldier he had created with pride, knowing that now, they would be invincible.

"Do you understand the command?" He asked sternly

"I am ready to comply." An emotionless voice replied

You stood tall, the black suit and gray vest you were wearing appeared even darker in the shadows of the private office as the mask that covered more than half of your face, perfectly concealed your identity.

The man smirked and pointed with his head towards the door.

You turned around and started walking.

Your mission?

To kill the Avengers.

—

Permanent taglist: @lizlil , @natsxwife , @froufrousnowman , @dannipotatoo , @ravensinthedaylight , @justarandomreaderxoxo , @theunchosenonee , @lovelyy-moonlight , @circe143 , @observeowl , @darkstar225 , @mmmmokdok , @halstead-severide-fan , @daggersquadphantom , @cherlenovix , @youralphawolf72

Story taglist: @graciegoeskrazy , @superforgottensoul , @marvels--slut , @louxbloom , @aubs444 , @notmeellaannyy , @amxrist , @k4t13l0u1s3 , @easybakeoven7 , @jackiehollanderr , @kaylaromanoff17 , @alldaysdreamers , @leoniaaasworld , @finleyfray , @almosttoopizza ,

#mama nat #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x daughter!reader #natasha x daughter!reader #natasha's child #natasha's kid #natasha romanoff x teen!reader #natasha x teen reader #natasha x baby!reader #winterwidow #bucky barnes x daughter!reader #bucky barnes

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brnesblogposts · 7 months ago

Text

monster in his nightmares

pairing bucky barnes x reader

warnings ANGST!!!

a/n can you guys let me know if you can click on my master list and are directed to my fics because it’s not working for me.

reblogs appreciated if you enjoyed !

You can’t breathe, you can’t breathe. Your neck is being squeezed so tight your vision spotting as panic takes over.

“Bu- Bucky” You whisper as best you can in broken breathes, he doesn’t know he’s doing it. He never does, his nightmares are vivid and so real to him and he can’t control his physical reactions, tears are rolling down your face as you move your hand to grip his metal wrist and try loosen his grip, you don’t want it to have to come to violence but the fear you might die and the fear he’d spend the rest of his life feeling guilty for something he couldn’t control- you start kicking him, kicking and hitting. Wake up, wake up you think to yourself

‘No. Stop. Please. Dont put me back in the chair, dont wipe my mind again’ Bucky thinks to himself in a panic as Hyrda agents push him back, how did they find him? how was he tricked into being taken again and now his memory wiped of everything he loves- his memories of you- ‘No.’ The thought of losing you is enough to make him push through and use all his strength, he takes his metal hand and wraps it around the nearest agents neck, it call kicks off into a frenzy then but he fights through it, he watches as the life drains out of the agents face.

“Bu- bucky?” What? No they don’t- they call him soldat- who’s speaking, who’s kicking him? this man he’s strangling sounds like a woman? odd. what’s happening?

He’s in a room, it’s dark. He’s on something soft, a mattress? They don’t give out those in Hydra so he can’t be back with them, who’s underneath him?

“You’re okay” Strangled sobs, you don’t know how much longer you can hold on. “Bucky” You all but desperately whine, that’s when he really wakes up.

Bucky shoots back quickly sitting on his knees as you take in deep breathes of oxygen and rub at your aching throat, he’s bewildered, did he? He hurt you. He hurt his doll.. He jumps off of the bed and backs away, he’s shaking, sweating, he’s starting to violently sob as reality comes crashing down. He almost killed you.

You finally get enough air in your lungs to notice Bucky is gone, you sit up and your heart breaks as you see him sitting against the wall on the other side of the room, looking at his metal hand like it’s a weapon, like he’s sickened by the sight of it. Getting up slowly you approach him and crouch in front of him, at the approach of your hand he flinches.

“No” That one word holding so much pain.

“Get away from me, I- I don’t wanna hurt you anymore Doll” He’s not looking at you, he can’t. If he sees the state of your neck, the bruises he’s left-

“Bucky” You whisper quietly as he shakes his head again, it’s hard for him to comeback down from nightmares but you don’t know what to do in this particular situation, he’s never hurt you because of them before, not this bad.

“It’s not your fault” You reassure him, not expecting an answer but you hope to get through to him, that the reassurance and love you show him right now will help him see he’s not the man in his nightmares.

“I know you didn’t mean to hurt me” You say as you sit down across him him still giving him space as he holds his head in his hands and cries.

“I’m okay” You don’t care how long you have to sit here, as long as Bucky needs you’re gonna be there for him.

You sit in silence for a few minutes and just watch him as he takes some deep breathes, a technique he learnt in therapy, you get up and grab him some water leaving it by him for him to take in his own time, he does eventually and takes small sips.

A record is playing softly in the background he notices, one of his favourites. He senses your presence, he knows you’re there but he doesn’t understand why. He almost killed you, why aren’t you running away from him?

“I-i’m dangerous, you should get away from me-” He wont meet your eyes.

“I trust you, Bucky.” You don’t know what else you can say to reassure him, he just needs time to come down from this.

“How?” He looks at you now, grimacing as he sees the bruises on your neck. “How can you trust me, look what I did.” He’s so ashamed.

“You didn’t mean to. You were having a nightmare, we can work this out, we can talk to some doctors and see how to get your physical reactions to nightmares under control Buck. If you think i’m leaving because of this you’re wrong. I’m fine, you came out of it and i’m okay” Tears build up behind your eyes but Bucky is so fragile and vulnerable right now you’re trying to be strong for him.

He stares at you for a few seconds, his eyes wet with tears and his face one of shock horror, you can’t hold it back anymore you start to tear up.

“I’m so sorry you have to go through this, I wish I could take it all away, I really wish I could.” You reach your hand out in hopes he’ll let you have that little bit of contact and he does, he takes your hand albeit cautiously and at the contact you start to cry harder.

“You don’t deserve any of it, Buck. You never did. You’re the best man i’ve ever met and your heart is so pure. It makes me so mad to think about what you’ve been through and how it will stick with you for the rest of your life. It’s fucked up and I wish- I wish I could- I want to kill everyone who has ever been bad to you or used you.” The frustration of having to watch Bucky suffer the severe PTSD that he does hurts your heart, it causes your chest to actually ache because he is so sweet, so gentle.

“Don’t cry” Bucky says in response as his heart is being ripped out of his chest at the sight of you so upset. “There’s no need to cry” Despite everything he’s been through seeing you even just the tiniest bit upset hurts him more than anything ever could, so it’s for that reason that he looks past the fear he’s holding and leans forward to pull you into his chest.

You instantly curl up, this is so grounding for Bucky, feeling your heartbeat against his, your skin on his skin, it’s so intimate for him in times like these where he’s taken back to times when he never received simple love like touch, now more than ever he cherishes it.

“Buck-“ You croak out as you kiss his face all over, trying to show just how much you love him. He shushes you and rocks with you, his head clearing and eyes drying up. Your presence alone does more than therapy ever can.

So you both sit there for awhile, the only sounds to be heard is the both of you breathing. You stroke comforting hands up and down Buckys back and through his hair, he relaxes into your touch, into the moment, present. No longer stuck in his nightmare he’s now in a dream, being with you is a dream.

After awhile you speak up “Do you want to go back to bed? Or we can go into the living room and watch a movie or a tv show? Whatever you wanna do” You would do anything for him to be okay, you would take his trauma and deal with it yourself if you could if you knew just for a second that he would finally be at peace in his own mind.

He thinks for a second, contemplating.

“The beds kind of- it’s- too fresh in my mind you know? You can go back to bed baby i’ll go to the cou-“

“No” You cut him off “I’m with you, i’m not leaving your side.” He smiles because he’s grateful for you, with that he stands up, you still clinging to him like a koala and moves the both of you to the couch laying down with you on top of him.

“What do you wanna watch?” He asks.

“Anything you want, whatever is gonna make you feel better” Your hands are in his hair again.

He puts on a lighthearted sitcom that makes the both of you laugh as he strokes his hands up and down your back soothing not just you but himself, the contact keeping him in the moment. That’s how the both of you spend the next hour or so before you hear Bucky snoring lightly, finally sleeping nightmare free and you join him, ready to comfort him should he be woken up again.

—

a/n i started writing this a few weeks ago and then i got busy and then i fixated on something else but anyways i finished it! kind of hate it now tho but i haven’t posted in awhile,

taglist- @ktgsoul @orihimi-19 @mostlymarvelgirl (let me know if you wanna be added to a permanent bucky taglist)

divider by @/cafekitsune

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kisses4tom · 5 months ago

Note

Sooo, since we got Uncle Billy do we now get GirlDad!Tom ?? I’ve looked high and low for a Tom X Reader family story😂😭 your writing is amazing <3

ᡣ𐭩 DADDY TOM

───────────────

YAYY FINALLY SOMEONE REQUESTED THIS!! 😭 I've been dying to write something like this since I have already made an uncle tommy hc! and thank you so much ml 💕

I think we can ALL collectively agree that Tom would be the BEST girl dad, right? 🌚 so the baby will be a little girl!

also I'm gonna make this a teen pregnancy (18), so from the very start up til now!

───────────────

when he finds out he would probably freeze for a moment before finally reacting (gotta soak it in yk)

he would be happy but shocked and confused at the same time

scared not to be present enough because of tour and the band

he would always kiss and touch your stomach

he'd cry when hearing the baby's heartbeat to the doctor 🥹🫶🏻

"I want the baby to be healthy, but if I had to guess I think it's a boy" (he 100% wants a girl)

idk I feel like he would call the baby "kleine Prinzessin" (little princess) or "kleiner Soldat" (little soldier) !!

when you go into labor he tries to keep his cool but deep down he's in full panic mode

the first time he met/held her it was like love at first sight for him even if he didn't quite know how to act since he never really had any past experiences with babies

he's very careful and gentle with her

always holding her

he would attack her with tickles to hear her little laugh

kiss attacks also

playing with her all the time

he wouldn't essentially spoil her (that's uncle Billy's job 😉) but he definitely gets her most things because he can't say no to that little face!

likes holding and showing her around: "look who's that in the mirror? it's you!"

definitely hiding her from the media

yet he LOVES talking about her in interviews!

though very very VERY rarely he would bring her out on stage and hold her like mf simba when she was about 1/2

his heart is always full whenever she's around

he would kneel down to talk to her‼��😩

always pushing her stroller or carrying her on his shoulders

don't ask me why but he'd get into play fights with her at the dinner table 😭 (especially when she's still learning to talk so she's speaking gibberish 😭)

he loves to take her baths and put fun toys in the tub

finds her extremely adorable in everything she wears

he'd give her his yellow dog plushie‼️😭 currently sobbing

I feel like he would try his best to let the baby's first word be "papa" 😭

when she's older he would start being more himself (so talk about things freely and make dirty jokes all the time)

he's not a regular dad, he's a cool dad! 😏 (please get the reference 😭)

he'd give her the talk 🫢🐝

he would pick her up in weird ways and make her laugh (like upside down etc lmfao 💀)

would let her do his hair but not his make-up

like I said in my uncle Tommy hc, i feel like he would love to play with the toy kitchen for some reason idk 💀

he's the overprotective girl dad FOR SURE (AND ITS THE HOTTEST AND CUTEST THING IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE)

he'd go down the slide with her 😭

at lunch/dinner he would always sit next to her

looooves when she's at their concerts and would ask Bill to dedicate her a song (especially her favorite)

he'd definitely write her a song too

he would make her try to eat a lemon 😭🍋

it's important to him that she has a good bond with her uncle Bill and the boys too! (uncle Georg and uncle Gustav 🥹)

"Y/n she looks more like me than you, gotta be honest"

he would give her what he didn't have growing up (if you read Bill's book, like I have, you'll know)

he wouldn't let anybody hurt or say anything wrong about her

hype man fr

high-key a very chill and permissive dad

he would make sure she knows her worth and to always be herself, without listening to what others say

always saying that she's the better copy of him

since he had her young, people (maybe even teachers at parent teacher conferences) mistake him for her brother and it's needless to say that he's very flattered while his daughter is just like 😐

they have a great bond

LITTLE FUN FACT‼️ Tom said in his podcast that if he ever has a daughter then his dream is to name her Nala like in the lion king movie 🤭😭 crying rivers rn part 2

your daughter tags along on tours, especially because it's very important for Tom and she loves it (idk if I already said this but oh well lmfaoo)

I have a feeling almost all her friends have a crush on Tom (i know i would 😋)

Tom is such a basic dad istg, he does bbq every sunday

if y'all ever become parents a second time then he would definitely have a happier reaction than the first one, yet he would be scared to take care of two little creatures~

his fans always ask about her during meet and greets and give her little presents, which he appreciates a lot

your daughter is pretty much popular in the entire fanbase you guys have and is considered a "lucky charm" from the band

Tom would give her the longest and most comforting hugs known to mankind

he'd make her a memory book with Bill 😭

and he'd give her some old goodies of his!

like some of his old clothes, hats, glasses etc..

overall he's the best dad and UGHHFHSJENF I cry just thinking about him not having any biological children :(

i hope you enjoyed this !! 💕 (also i apologize for any spelling mistakes but your girl over here is too lazy to re-read 🤪 love y'aaaallll)

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towelenjoyer · 6 months ago

Text

Dating your colonel was definitely against the rules but who could resist when the 6'5 foot man looked like he was going to cry because he was "ruining a three year friendship".

König held an almost wilted bouquet of flowers, apologizing because it's been so long since he bought it and pondered over asking you and today is the last day he has with you before your mission.

"Soldat, I have thought about this for a while now, Schatz", the petname sat heavy on his tongue, awkward as he tries to formulate and speak his words properly.

"I need you, romantically, much more than just a friend although fear to ruin this- great friendship and partnership burns me, this soul craves lifetimes with you", he speaks and stammers as if his heart isn't beating faster than that one time he screwed up a mission years ago as a rookie.

He hands the bouquet to you momentarily with slow, precise, and hesitant hands before quickly deciding against it and snatching it out of your hands, throwing it away somewhere into the woods, eyes lost and deep in thought as he holds his hands together, you can tell he was trying so hard not to run away from you, from this.

The behemoth of a man was so soft on base specifically with you, sure he was quieter and calmer than on the battlefield on base with his team but just with you he let himself be a bit more. Loosening his jaw, untucking his shirt, and letting his eyebrows unwind as he asks you what movie you've downloaded and are watching on your small burner phone.

His hands and heart itch to bound over behind you, to wrap his arms around your waist as just to watch the dumb comedy movie with you, trusting you with his sleeping body once he grew tired just as he has trusted you with his life on the battlefield.

His eyes widen with childlike glee as you accept his albeit shitty confession, a slight crinkle in his eyes visible through his mask as you take his hands in yours, a smile visible on your eyes the same as his before the giant man leans down to press a clumsy yet brushing kiss to your lips, too desperate to acknowledge the fabric between your lips.

#konig cod #konig x reader #konig call of duty #konig mw2 #konig #könig x reader #könig cod #könig #könig call of duty #könig mw2

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collaredsoldat · 2 months ago

Text

Winter Soldier Post!HYDRA Headcannons

a/n: I was writing something earlier and it made me want to write this. It's just a random collection of headcannons I have. You bring him home after he escapes HYDRA. You have your hands full. Unedited.

Following the events of the movies, let's pretend you bring Bucky home after CATWS. He's still the soldier. He's still Soldat. And Soldat doesn't speak. In fact he is silent for days. Uttering nothing, not a peep.

Soldat is silent, watchful, wary. He doesn't like being approached too quick. He stays in corners. He stays in small spaces. Being too exposed now makes him feel anxious. He reacts with aggression if he is anxious.

You learn all this.

He also becomes visibly irritated when he feels confused and stressed, which is pretty much constantly.

He needs you to order him around, which sounds harsh but the sudden change of environment and treatment is really confusing for him. He is too fresh from HYDRA to immediately just heal. That's now how it works. This kind of trauma doesn't just go away. This man is so severely mistreated, you aren't even sure where to start.

Simple things like telling him to shower or sleep. Otherwise he stays up for days and refuses to do anything. Free will is such a foreign concept to him.

Re-feeding and giving him nutrients and fluids is a nightmare. Luckily, you had a medic friend who could look at him without the involvement of the government since he was in hiding for now. You got all the supplies you needed, but it was still a hassle. His options were very limited when it came to food. Oatmeal, mashed potatoes, applesauce, things like that. He could barely stomach anything more solid than that.

He sits still for the IVs, but sometimes he doesn't and he puts up a struggle, assuming it is some kind of drug to manipulate him. You just have to stay close and talk to him so he pays more attention to you than what your friend is doing.

He got sick a lot. You had to be careful about that. Too much food made him sick, his body wasn't used to it.

He also was having difficulty remembering you and where he was, the fact that he wasn't undergoing constant brainwashing made all the chemicals go haywire. It made his moods unpredictable. He had aggressive bouts, though he never harmed you badly, he would grab you if you got too close out of instinct and fear.

He often broke down and during these times it was a gamble whether or not he'd let you around him. He felt so pathetic and small and horrible, confused and unsure for the first time in decades. He was used to being mindless besides the orders barked at him. Simple, easy, all he had to do was listen.

But now, things were different. He was no longer being kept in a shitty cell or in an icebox. He wasn't tortured daily, he wasn't taken into rooms where agents were greedy with him. He wasn't hurt. And...it confused him even more.

You notice he sits strange when he does. He doesn't like to sit for long. He says it hurts. He prefers to stand. You don't understand until later, and you do your best to help ease his pain.

He didn't understand why you didn't hurt him. Why you didn't hit him. Sometimes he hit himself when he felt like he deserved it, each time he felt a pit in his stomach when he saw the disapproving look in your eye and listened to the scold that came after. You were gentle...but firm. He could not hurt himself. That made him bad. Disobedient. Disobedient soldiers are punished. It was a cruel cycle that ran in his mind. You had to be the one to stop it.

When he did speak, it was simple Russian phrases. Yes, no, he addressed you as handler, his responses were monotone and recited. He had been trained not to speak. That wasn't what he was supposed to do with his mou-

Enough. The memories are invading again.

You could tell when he zoned out into his episodes, his eyes became glossy and he seemed to become a zombie. You sat him down somewhere quiet and stayed with him. Sometimes he didn't want to be touched, sometimes he let you. But you had to be careful, you never wanted him to be uncomfortable or make things worse.

It was a tender thing. But it was something you were more than happy doing.

After a few weeks he seeks you out more often. He stays close by, he even sits close to you or tries to get your attention. He's still quiet, but he speaks more now. Even in english, which you find a relief. By you you've learned the short Russian phrases he spoke, but it was good he spoke english too.

He starts to hang closer to you, he stays out of his 'hiding spots' in your home and stays around you more often. He sits on the couch beside you, starting to seek you out. It's a positive sign he's growing more comfortable.

He doesn't like being alone for very long. If you have a job, it might be hard for him. You try to get one where you can work from home, otherwise he is very anxious and clingy when you come home from your shift.

The spare bedroom is his, but he often finds himself migrating to your bedroom through the night. He needs your presence, he needs to know he's not alone. The silence is deafening, and knowing your body is beside him is comforting when he sleeps.

Speaking of, he starts off on the floor. It's a little heartbreaking, he sees the bed as a test, an awkward thing he doesn't want to sleep in. So he starts on the floor, then you move the mattress off the bed to the floor, along with some pillows and blankets. That seemed to help condition him to an actual bed before he eventually sleeps in yours with you.

You know recovery and his healing is going to be a long, bumpy road, but you are just happy he sees you as protection and comfort, and his trust is slowly building with you.

Thanks for reading.

Dividers by @/strangergraphics | Images from Pinterest

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #the winter soldier #the winter soldier x reader #winter soldier #winter soldier x reader #james buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #the winter soldier x you #winter soldier x you #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes imagine #captain america the winter soldier #blythewrites⛓

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