#So this podcast scratched a longtime itch

[cosmermaid]

#dracula: the danse macabre#Mina and Dracula's relationship in this podcast is crazy#They're enemies#They have such divorced vibes without any of the romantic history#They enjoyed wielding power over one another and it sounded so kinky#They're mirrors to one another#Also I just need to add#His actual wife was murdered because she stood up to a powerful and cruel monster in defense of an innocent#So like#Mina might be his type#Now is he her type no I don't think so#But let's be honest Mina#You felt really good treating him like a dog and getting him to beg#...In retrospect your marriage to Jonathan suddenly makes a lot of sense#But also I do have to wonder#Does some part of Jonathan live on in him?#Because if so that might be a contributing factor#Listen they make me crazy#I need about ten more seasons of them#I want to see what the hell this dynamic grows into

Potentially heartwarming Dracula: The Danse Macabre thought: Dracula will now get to experience the sunrise and the day-lit world again for the first time in centuries, thanks to his connection with Mina. Also, if she saw him in her mirror, staring back at her, does that mean he too gets to see himself for the first time in centuries through her eyes?

[spookshowcinema-blog]

Library of the Damned: Servant of the Underworld

Welcome kiddos to Library of the Damned. Remember books? Those things the other kids used to throw at you in school? The magical well from which movies and TV shows emerge? Well it turns out that they’re pretty great. Who knew? So in addition to Podcasts, Movies, and Comics, we’ll be taking a look at the oldest and classiest medium there is, Literature! Today’s feature: Aliette de Bodard’s  Servant of the Underworld .

Servant of the Underworld is a (wait for it), “Meso-American Fantasy Noir” (ooh, it gives me goosebumps every time I get to type that out) set in a fictionalized version of Tenochitlan, the capital of the Mexica empire. “But Mateo”, you say, “why are you covering a fantasy novel on a horror blog?” Well, A. Fuck you. My Circus, My Monkeys.  And B. Have you read anything about Aztec Mythology?

If you have, congratulations! We can probably be friends! If not, well I can’t blame you. Aztec Mythology is some of the most brutal and intense mythos floating out there in the stratosphere, and it has been pretty much ignored by Western Fantasy Fiction. In a world where every kid in America can name at least three norse gods right after they finish watching Hercules on Blu Ray, the Myths and stories of the Mexica remain untapped.

If it sounds like I’m about to start frothing at the mouth and start screaming about the lack of representation of Meso-American Fantasy Fiction, it’s because I probably am. So before the men in white coats put me in a straight jacket and throw me in a padded cell, let’s dig into Servant of the Underworld!

In Servant of the Underworld, we follow Acatl-tzin, the High Priest of the Dead. As the High Priest to the God of Death Mictlantecuhtli, it is Acatl’s responsibility to determine cause of death as well performing the holy rituals to send the dead safely into the underworld. When a powerful priestess is seemingly killed and his brother is framed for the crime, Acatl is tasked with hunting down the culprits and clearing his brother’s name. Over the course of his investigation, Acatl runs afoul of demons, interrogates capricious Gods, and quite possibly saves the fifth world.

This book is good folks. Like really good. It’s so good that even though I’ve got it on Audiobook, I want to rush out and buy it in hardcover so that I can give it a place of honor on my bookshelf. I want to lend it to everyone I know who reads books. I want to lend it to everyone I know who doesn’t read books! I want to read overblown think pieces written about that trend on facebook. I want to geek out about its TV adaptation and listen to weekly episode recap podcasts about it!

I like it, is what I’m saying.

What makes this book so good? A lot of things, but we can basically boil it down to two key traits; quality and rarity.Quality pretty much speaks for itself. Servant of the Underworld is a well written novel with solid prose and solid pacing. More specifically, it’s an excellent example of the Fantasy Noir Sub-Genre.

Fantasy Noir is a peculiar sub-genre. The two genres it’s meant to combine don’t seem like natural bedfellows in the same way that other popular cross-genre mashup do. I’m talking mainstays like the action-comedy and Fantasy-Romances. But when you look at the international success of series like “The Witcher” and Terry Pratchett’s “City Watch” books, it’s clear that there’s something in the genre that resonates with readers.

For its part, Servant of the Underworld scratches both the fantasy and noir itches nicely. Like any good noir the stakes start out small and spiral outward to greater and greater levels. As it’s not bound by the constraints of reality, the stakes end up at world ending proportions, a nice touch that puts the “vast” in noir’s vast conspiracy. As a fantasy novel, Servant of the Underworld paint a rich and vibrant world of blood magic and sacred ritual. The magical and social laws that govern this world make sense, and feel fresh to longtime readers of the genre.

Rarity, on the other hand, is a bit less self-explanatory. Remember how I warned you about frothing at the mouth and the men in white coats? Well this is where that might happen. Rarity, in regards to Servant of the Underworld, refers to the fact that aside from its own sequels, there really isn’t another book like it.

Fantasy is a genre that’s dominated by European folklore and mythology. Fantasy Novels are jam packed with aged Wizards and illustrious Elves, filled to the brim with rosy cheeked Dwarves and savage Orcs. We can thank Tolkien and his seminal Lord of The Rings series for this. For better or for worse, his books served as the backbone for what the Fantasy genre would become.  

This status quo isn’t typically a bad thing. The familiar is familiar because it is comforting and enjoyable. But we’ve gotten to the point where European Fantasy worlds are not only the norm, but the only option. Fantasy is meant to be a genre made of impossibilities, a well infinite realities and endless wonders. And yet, rather than a countless cavalcade of new ideas, we find a ceaseless stream of variations on the same old idea.

Servant of the Underworld is the best Meso-American Fantasy book I’ve ever read. It’s also the only Meso-American Fantasy book I’ve ever read. I want to read more like it, and right now those books aren’t out there. Let’s change that.

[musiccomplin03]

The Jim Henson Workshop goes for a hard R in The Happytime Murders trailer: Watch

If on your commute to work today, you stopped in you tracks, paused your podcasts, and thought to yourself “you know, I'd really like to see a puppet achieve a roping orgasm before my week is over,” that's an extremely specific and weird thought to have, and also, the first red-band trailer for The Happytime Murders is here to scratch that particular itch.

In a world where puppets and humans coexist peacefully (and otherwise), private investigator Phil Phillips (longtime Muppets puppeteer Bill Barretta) finds himself chasing after a serial killer who's executing onetime cast members of the popular '80s show The Happytime Gang, and other puppets as well. Paired with the intrepid LAPD Detective Edwards (Melissa McCarthy), the unlikely team has to work its way through a criminal underworld full of puppet sex workers, puppet drug dealers, and indeed, puppet murderers.

Needless to say, this long-gestating and clearly R-rated project is a far cry from anything the Jim Henson Workshop has ever released to the public before. Not surprisingly, it took a while for the project to come to fruition, so so it's a treat to finally see director Brian Henson's demented creation heading for movie screens, where it'll almost assuredly be the future subject of a news story about a disinterested parent dragging their poor children to watch consenting puppets bone.

The Happytime Murders will bounce its way into theaters on August 17th. The cast also includes Maya Rudolph, Joel McHale, and Elizabeth Banks.