#So if this looks messier than usual. Don't worry about it

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

Resonance

[pretty-little-mind33]

James Potter x slytherin!fem!reader

Summary: Playing Quidditch against your secret boyfriend is usually fun…

Genre: Fluff/hurt and comfort <3

Warnings: rivalry, chaser!captain!james, chaser!captain!reader, secret relationship (previous enemies to lovers), injuries, swearing, protective!james (my baby), short-ish

JAMES POTTER MASTERLIST

It had begun innocently.

You and James had promised not to tell anyone about your relationship for one week. Only that week turned into another, which eventually turned into four, and now it's much too awkward announcing to the entire school that you've been dating James Potter—the same boy you have publicly spent years saying you couldn't stand—for almost six months.

So, you never did, and neither did he.

However, the upside of your little arrangement was that now Quidditch is endlessly more entertaining.

"You ready, Cap?" Anne, your seeker, asks as you secure your gloves around your wrists. You nod and pull on the straps tightly. This is possibly the most important game of the season and you're determined to win.

You drown out the crowd's cheers when you mount your broom, adjust your hair, and fly up to where your lovely boyfriend is waiting for you to shake his hand.

James looks handsome, with his messy curls messier from the wind, and your heart flutters unintentionally. "Y/l/n," he says and balances on his broom as he grins.

"Potter."

He holds out his arm and looks around at his team and then at yours. "Good luck," James says and you know him well enough to hear his sincerity.

You take his hand, your breath hitching when his thumb caresses across your knuckles. It's such a quick brush you almost think you'd imagined it, but then James sends you a smile—that smile—and you know you hadn't imagined anything.

You drop his hand but return his smile. "May the best team win," your voice is smooth and you hear James chuckle as you fly away from him. You don't dare look back as you hide your smile and nod to your teammates.

The game starts normally, but as time progresses it becomes obvious this particular match is more competitive than usual. James's players become more flustered as the game continues, but you don't concern yourself with them as Slytherin is in the lead. Which, to your dismay, is more uncommon than you would like considering James's team is talented.

Annoyingly talented.

However, you should have been concerned considering when Danny Shepard hits the bludger directly at you out of pure anger, you're unprepared.

The front of your broom shatters from the force and you let out a loud scream when you jerk to the side, your broom malfunctioning as you plummet to the ground.

You can hear some of your teammates call out your name in worry but when you fall onto the grass and roll into the sidelines of a muddy ditch. Your eyes water as a piercing pain makes your head pound.

"Y/n!" James's calls and when you sit up, you see him land on the ground. He lets his broom fall without a care and sprints over to you. He kneels next to you and gently holds your head up, "Shit, shit, shit, shit," James sounds terrified. You blink. The world around him is spinning and his features are blurry.

"Help!" James screams and your heart leaps. What the hell is he doing? Everyone will know. You try to shake your head to tell him to shut up but you just wince in pain. James loops his arm around your back and concern etches his face when you cry out in pain from his movement.

You don't remember much after that. Just that some teachers and your teammates had rushed to your side to make sure you were okay. You weren't. You remember some of James's friends had to hold him back when the teachers hurried you to the Hospital Wing.

However, you wake up to him next to you. James is still in his Quidditch uniform, his head in his arms, his arm crossed beside your hips, as his chest lifts and falls lightly.

You blink, adjusting to the dim light from the lamp, and your shifting must wake James up because he looks up. Sheet lines are drawn on his cheeks and his voice is hoarse when he mutters, "Baby?"

"Hi," you whisper, forcing a small smile.

It's as if his entire face brightens and in his excitement James jumps up and wraps his arms around your shoulders. "Merlin, you're really okay! I was so worried," his voice sounds tense and when you wince a little, he moves back like he'd burned you. "Sorry, sorry," he blushes pink and slumps down onto the chair again.

"It's okay, Jamie," you smile at him and then ask, "What happened?" You look around you. It's dark outside. You must have been passed out for a few hours, at the very least.

"Shepard aimed his bludger at you out of anger," James hurries to explain, "He's off the team. Definitively. No arguments."

You smile at him a little but ask the important question, "You continued the game, did you?"

James nods solemnly, "Yeah, we did," he pauses as if debating something, "Gryffindor won," he says after a moment. Your eyebrows scrunch hearing him and you groan, cursing. James is quick to hold your hand. "But you'll beat us next time, lovie. It was such a close game."

You roll your eyes at him, turning your head to bury your face into your pillow. "You're such a twat," you whine and then look up at him through your hair, "this is why I disliked you."

James's smile falters, seemingly a little hurt. "I'm being serious! You played well. Your entire team did," he whispers, stroking his thumb over your hand.

You snort, "Oh, I know you're being serious, James. You're too kind. It's infuriating."

"Would you rather I rub my win in your face?" James asks with a raise of his brow. You sit up and glare at him. Admittedly, James has never been humble about his team winning a game but this was different.

You're his girlfriend now. His injured, and incredibly competitive, girlfriend.

"Well, nothing would have stopped you before," you say and James rolls his eyes. He leans in closer.

"Well, back then, I wouldn't have cared that one of my players hit you like that."

You send him a suspicious look.

"Okay, I would have cared, but not this much."

You smile. As much as you hate James for his undeniable chivalry and how annoyingly kind-hearted he is, if he wasn't then he wouldn't be the person you loved. And oh boy, do you love him.

"I want everyone to know about us," you say suddenly. James's eyes round like saucers. His hand finds yours and he tilts his head like a puppy, an endearing confusion gracing his features. He squeezes your hand in his.

"You must have really hit your head hard baby–"

"No," you interrupt him, your voice coming out stern, "I'm ready. I'm not ashamed. I've never been ashamed. I just didn't want anyone to know because if they did then they'd meddle, and if didn't know then you were mine. Only mine."

A smile curls James's lips. "What's changed?"

You look into his eyes. "Well, now I want everyone to know you are mine."

James raises and eyebrow and he chuckles. "So basically, you're claiming me?"

"Yeah, I guess I am."

With a smile, James nuzzles into you and then kisses your cheek, right under one of your bruises. "Good, because everyone already knows about us. When you passed out, I made too much of a scene and the game was up," he says sheepishly, "It's all anyone is talking about apparently."

You giggle as his breath tickles your skin and you hold his nape. "Fucking let them, I don't care. All that matters is that you're mine."

"I am yours," James confirms into your ear, "Wholeheartedly yours, Y/n."

[leah-lover]

Little helper

lucy bronze x reader ( smut 18+)

Summary: you help Lucy with her frustrating about leaving Barcelona.

Content: spanking, daddy kink, strap-on sex, aftercare.

Ever since you and Lucy came to London she has been different. Her step is heavier, her sleep is messier and she is much more quiet than usual. You knew that leaving a club that she loved so much would haunt her. She loved Barcelona with all her heart. She adored the weather, the city, the team, and all the relationships she formed there. For you it hasn't been any different. Sure you missed Barcelona but not as much as Lucy did. After all, as long as she was with you you were happy.  You tried to talk to her about and to get her to share her thoughts with you but to no resolution. 

With the days progressing she only got sadder. She hasnt ignored you or your needs but she felt a little different, a little colder. Your heart ached for her and your brain hated her stubbornness and needed to always seem like she was okay. 

Today was no different than the past week.  Usually, she would get from training, go sit on the couch and wait for you to join  her with dinner in hand. She would cuddle with you, kiss you and sometimes have sex with you. But today you were determined to change her mood. As soon as she sat on the couch you took off your apron and your oversized t-shirt to show a set of black laced lingerie. You put your hair in a ponytail and headed staring to the living room. Once you got there you stood in front of her and knelt between her wide spread legs. She looked at you amazed and surprised. Her eyes scanned every inch of your body hungrily from your eyes to your chest to your core. She then leaned forward and gave you a sweet kiss. 

“ What did I do to deserve this?” she whispered a meare inch from your face. “ you have been sad lately and i thought since you didn't want to talk about it,  you can take it out on me?” you answered while looking at the floor, your submissive instincts kicking in.  “ Is my little girl worried about her daddy?” she teased. “ Yes, very much. I want to please you and make you feel better.” you whisper while still looking at the floor beneath you. 

Lucy then lifts your head up by your chin and takes your lips for a lustful kiss. “ I don't know if I can do this little one. Daddy is very angry today.” she admitted once you two separate. 

“ But daddy I can take it. I can take everything. I want to make you feel better.” 

“ I don't trust myself today. What if I hurt you?” you never heard lucy say that before a little part of you got scared once you heard her say this but you need so badly to make her feel better. 

“ You wont hurt me daddy. I trust you.” you reassure her. She stayed quiet for a minute. 

“ giving you a spanking would make daddy feel better.” she said. You immediately get up from your position and go to her lap. She gives you a pillow to put your head on. “ if you need me to stop, safe word.” she demanded. You nod in response. “ use your words little one.” 

“ Yes daddy.” you respond while you situate your head on the pillow. Her hands roamed every inch on available skin on your ass before the first hit. It was painful but it made your core flutter. 

Then came the second hit, the third and the forth. Your ass was pink, your skin was on fire, and your new underwear was damp. The room  echoed grunts from Lucy after each spank, hisses of pain from you, and occasional whispers of “ thank you daddy.” By the 10th spank,  your core became needy and the hisses of pain became moans. “ is daddy's little slut turned on? Did you want to be spanked so badly?” she said in a condescending tone. She didn't leave you time to answer, she gave a much stronger spank to which you responded with a pornographic moan. 

Lucy’s focus was on your ass. Every  spank was powerful, she didn't stop until she reached 40 spanks. By then your ass was red, your eyes were filled with tears, and your moans turned into cries of pain. At the 40th  spank she froze and closed her eyes. The echo carried your muffled cries. A few minutes later, she helped you straddle her lap. Your ass was in the air because sitting on it would be painful. 

“ You did soo good for daddy little one.” she said while wiping your tears away. “ Daddy feels so much better. I am not angry anymore.” she confesses. She then takes your lips for a much softer and more intimate kiss. You stay silent. The skin on your ass was burning and your core was needy and sensitive. “ Daddy thinks her good little girl deserves a reward. What do you want us to do?” you didn't usually choose what to do so you froze for a second. While you were thinking, Lucy's hand roamed your back and took off your bra. 

“ I want you to make love to me.” you whispered. She kissed your lips again, then moved on to your neck where she left shallow kisses. 

Lucy was aware of what your choice of words meant. You didnt ask for her to “fuck you” or for her to give you her “ cock” you wanted her to make love to you. She carried you to the bedroom and put you on  the bed slowly so as to not irritate your already sensitive skin. You watched as she went to the closet and came out wearing nothing but your favorite strap. She immediately went to work worshiping your body and giving every inch of your skin a passionate kiss. The silence in the room quickly turned into a symphony of moans coming from both you and her. When she arrived at your core. She found your pussy dripping with arousal. She came back up  to you and gave you another kiss. “ If I had known a spanking would get you this wet, I would have done it a long time ago.” you couldn't think about anything but her cock at this point. “ I need you,” you whispered. She immediately started to duck you after that. Her thrust was slow but fulfilling. She didn't leave you as her lips found a spot to bruise your neck. 

“ I am so full. I want to come.” you whisper in between moans. You felt lucy smile against your lips.  “ whenever you are ready.” Lucy loved to edge you but since this was a reward she wanted to make it easy on you. She kept her thrusts deep and slow which quickly made you cum. Your legs started to shake quickly and your head was deep in your pillow. A few minutes later Lucy came too in the same intensity as you. 

She stayed inside you for a few minutes until you both came down. “ stay still, I am gonna go get us a glass of water.” she said as she kissed your head. She then came back witha cloth, a bottle of lotion and 2 bottles of water. You were quiet, your brain still fuzzy from what just happened. She cleaned you up and handed you the water. “ turn around for daddy to apply the lotion on you.” she demanded. “ Daddy, I need to cuddle with you.” you answer shyly. 

“ We will , princess but I need to apply this first.” Getting you to do anything after you just had sex that didn't involve cuddling was a challenge for lucy. “ The quicker you turn around the faster we can cuddle. You comply angrily and let her apply the lotion on you. She does so in a sweet manner leaving a kiss when she was done. She found her place next to you and you cuddled to her side. You practically layed on top of her so that your ass can heal at night. 

“ Thank you for tonight my love.” 

“ You can always talk to me, you know.” 

“ not today, maybe tomorrow.” you saw her eyes closed as she drifted asleep. 

[stawbeemilk]

⤷ insecurities they think are beautiful; part 2 – hq

✩ characters: various

✩ warnings: none

✩ a/n: i've been super busy with work but i'm finally back! i decided to write a part 2 to this bc i've been feeling pretty down lately. but yeah these are once again all things i personally struggle with or have struggled with in the past ◡̈

⭑ bare face

every time he gets the opportunity to see you without makeup, he swears he feels his heart beat twice as fast. of course he appreciates all the time and effort it takes for you to do your makeup, but he just thinks there's something so intimate about seeing you fresh out of the shower, your hair still damp and your face entirely bare. he doesn't miss the way you tend to avoid eye contact, how you shy away from him and subconsciously try to hide your face, and it makes his heart sink because how do you not realise how cute you are? his favourite part of the day is waking up next to you and getting to see your pretty face, imperfections and all— it never fails to make his heart flutter.

⤷ hinata, fukunaga, iwaizumi, tendou, suna, osamu, ennoshita

⭑ messy hair

he thinks your unruly hair is adorable. he knows that it can sometimes make you feel a little self-conscious, worrying that you don't look presentable with your hair a mess and finding yourself becoming frustrated with it because of how long you spend trying to style it in the morning, but he loves the way it sets you apart from everyone else. he might occasionally tease you about it, but it's always intended to be lighthearted and he never means anything by it. likes to ruffle your hair for his own amusement, making it even messier than it is already and enjoying the way you pout at him and try to smooth it down.

⤷ kuroo, tsukishima, matsukawa, yaku, akaashi, daishou, hoshiumi

⭑ beauty marks

he finds himself drawn to the pretty marks on your face, unable to take his eyes off you because you're so beautiful. whenever he goes to kiss you he always starts off by letting his lips trail over the points of your face where your marks reside, before softly pressing them against your own. he loves how unique they make you look, and he thinks they compliment your features perfectly. it makes him so sad when he sees you trying to cover them up with makeup, and the fact that you don't see them the way he does genuinely hurts him. he loves the idea that your beauty marks are where your lover kissed you the most during your past life, and he likes to kiss them in hopes that he'll be leaving those marks on you in your next life too.

⤷ sugawara, kai, oikawa, tanaka, konoha, kita, hirugami, asahi

⭑ cellulite

he loves to randomly grab your thighs at any chance he gets, enjoying the way the supple flesh feels under his palms. he thinks you look amazing in thigh high socks and cute little skirts, and whenever he sees the small amount of pudge at the top of your socks he'll definitely have a hard time keeping his hands to himself. to be honest he probably didn't even realise you had cellulite until you pointed it out to him, too preoccupied with how absolutely gorgeous you look to notice such a small detail. reminds you that it's completely normal and natural, and will reassure you that he thinks it's beautiful as many times as it takes until you start to believe him.

⤷ daichi, bokuto, yamamoto, kyotani, atsumu, nishinoya, meian

⭑ being thin

he honestly can't understand why you don't like your body, because in his eyes you're literally perfect. he knows that you tend to wear baggier clothing most of the time, the loose fabric swallowing up your figure and concealing the parts you dislike the most about yourself, but he would be lying if he said he didn't love those days when it's really hot outside and you opt for something that's a little more revealing than usual. he adores the way tighter clothes look on you, and the way they show off and accentuate your beautiful figure. he thinks you look so pretty and delicate, and the fact you're smaller than him makes him swoon.

⤷ kageyama, kenma, hanamaki, sakusa, yamaguchi, goshiki, kunimi

⤷ please do not repost my works on any other sites!

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

You and Eddie get into an argument about the girl he's giving guitar lessons too. Angst, misunderstandings and bad communication ensues.

Warnings. Mdni. 18+ only, angst. Miscommunication and misunderstandings. Idiots in love. Jealousy.

💞

You and Eddie had been together for a few months and up until this point you had never had a cross word.

He had been giving some girl guitar lessons, her name was Britney and she was gorgeous, amazingly cool and hilarious.

Tonight you had walked in on them laughing together and looking all cosy. Something in you kinda broke inside, it was ridiculous because you knew Eddie would never cheat, but you still felt your stomach bottom out.

Hearing Eddie gush about Britney and how metal she was and was like a rockstar on the guitar didn't help either.

You weren't proud of it but you were quiet and a little less warmer than you'd usually be and when Britney made excuses to leave, you were left wracked with guilt.

Eddie had rounded on you asking ''Why were you being such a bitch?" and that had made you even more pissed and the argument ensued.

"I'm sorry that walking in on my boyfriend looking so fucking cosy with someone else put me in a bad mood" you bite back at him and Eddie's big brown eyes darken in rage.

"You're being fucking ridiculous right now you know that?" it hurt hearing Eddie say that and you lashed out without thinking about what you were saying.

"Oh so I'm ridiculous because I hate seeing some girl make gooey eyes at my boyfriend, I'm such a bad girlfriend for being a little bit wary" Eddie shakes his head and the temperature in the room turns colder.

"Or it's obvious that you don't fucking trust me. So if you don't trust me then what's the fucking point?" your breath hitches and there's a deep pit of gloom and dread, in your stomach.

"Are you breaking up with me?" you whimper and want to take back everything you said, tell him that of course you trust him but you're so stunned, your heart is breaking.

Without another word you storm out before Eddie can confirm your worst fears.

❤️

Instead of going home you go straight to Nancy's who immediately digs out some ice cream and let's you cry out all the heartache, you both stay up most of the night but end up crashing around 5am.

Nancy is ready up and getting ready for school, you have the worst headache and just want to sleep a little longer so she leaves you to sleep, brings you up some pancakes and freshly squeezed orange juice that Mrs Wheeler kindly made up for you.

In return you help her around the house, trying anything to take your mind of your heartache about Eddie.

When Nancy comes back home she gently explains that Eddie has been calling you and is worried that you haven't answered.

"I think you need to listen to what he has to say honey, he looks a wreck, I think he's driving Mike and the rest of the kids here after Hellfire so if you want to wait"

Nervously you nod and try to calm your anxious mind that Eddie is going to break up with you for good.

By the time that you hear Eddie's van and he's parked outside, you're on tenterhooks. Eddie looks like he's barely slept, his hair is messier than usual and he has the saddest look in his beautiful brown eyes.

That look makes you want to burst into tears there and then. You hate that you're the cause.

"Sweetheart, I'm so sorry, his voice is rougher than normal, his hands are shaking and you reach out to steady them.

"I'm sorry too Eddie. I was a bitch and rude and of course I trust you, I trust you with my life and I hate that I made you think otherwise" his eyes fill with pain and he swallows.

"I shouldn't have called you a bitch. I've been a mess since you left and I was worried as shit when you weren't answering your phone, Mike told me you stayed here last night with Nance so I knew I would come here as soon as I could"

The tension slowly begins to leave your body and you feel soothed as Eddie pulls you in his arms

"Also Britney has just started dating Gareth, she was learning guitar to impress him and I was teaching her how to play his favourite song."

Fuck. "I'm so sorry Eddie" he softens and kisses your forehead.

"Even if she was interested I don't care. I'm not interested in her. How could you think I'd want her or anyone when I already have the most amazing, beautiful princess"

A warm fluttery feeling pools in your belly and you cuddle into Eddie and peer at him sadly.

"I just got insecure when you talked about how badass Britney was on the guitar and how metal she was" Eddie strokes your cheek and you melt into his touch.

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I didn't realise that was bothering you. Honestly yeah she's metal and pretty badass at the guitar but she's not you. She's not the one I'm head over heels in love with. You are"

"Oh" well shit, you'd definitely fucked up and misread everything. This is the first time Eddie has said I love you. It's a big deal for him, you know that and it is for you too.

"I'd never cheat on you or hurt you princess, I'm so in love with you" Tears roll down your cheeks and you kiss him fiercely.

"I love you too Eddie, I should have tried better at communicating with you" You sigh and cuddle into him, feeling calmer than you have in days.

"We both should learn to communicate better" he corrects you and you nod. It feels like a weight has been lifted of you.

"I really should apologise to Britney too" he hums in agreement.

"She thinks your really cool by the way and she put up with me constantly gushing about you"

Shit. Yeah you definitely have to apologise. In fact you make that your next mission first thing on Monday morning.

For now you were just going to bask in Eddie's love for a little while.

Britney as it turns out is a total sweetheart about the whole thing when you speak to her first thing on Monday and excitedly tells you about her dates with Gareth and how she played him the song Eddie taught her.

Not only do you gain the start of a friendship with Britney but you and Eddie are more in love than ever.

🫶

[bedsyandco]

part two of that luke and violet blurb please

𐙚 ─── pairing: violet kingston x luke hughes

𐙚 ─── summary: in which violet sees luke with another girl and leaves the party without him, breaking one of their rules and he goes home after her . . . part 2 of this

𐙚 ─── word count: 1.4K

𐙚 ─── a/n: i’m so obsessed with them helpppp

"what are you doing here?" violet asks, gently closing the door turning to look at luke as he leans against her dining room table. his curly hair looking a little messier than usual, as if he's been running his hands through it all night. or maybe someone else has... violet thinks bitterly, swallowing the pit in her throat at the thought.

he doesn't like it when people touch his hair, but he doesn't stop her as she walks closer, slides perfectly into the space between his legs and runs her fingers through his curls. they just stand like that for a few minutes

"stop that, I'm mad at you, and you're distracting me," luke mumbles gently removing her hand from his hair and squeezing it before letting it drop at her side. his gaze catches on the "L" necklace laying against her collarbone, and he adjusts it, letting his fingers hover a few seconds longer than necessary. when his eyes roam down to his hoodie she was wearing, along with what he presumed was those almost non existent sleeping shorts she liked to wear by the way her toned legs were on display, he lets his head drop back with a sigh

"don't stand this close to me either. three meters at all times until we're done talking," luke says pushing her hip away softly and making his way across the room and violet's lips quirk up slightly in amusement

"is this enough distance for you?" violet asks teasingly, a smirk painted on her lips and a glint in her eye, as she hoists herself up onto the dining room table, legs dangling off the side and luke ignores the way that smirk seems to shoot a pang straight to his heart and his dick. this girl is gonna be the end of him, he knew it the day he met her.

"how did you get home?" luke questions knowing he drove her there and none of the guys left the party which means she either got a ride from someone he didn't know or took an uber home. both options he wasn't exactly thrilled about. especially since he would've jumped at the opportunity to come home with her and escape nina's claws digging into his bicep

"I walked," violet mumbles softly, knowing he's not gonna like the answer

"say that again? I must have heard you wrong," luke says, a frown between his brows

"I walked," she says again and Luke only stares at her for a few seconds, not wanting to speak out of anger

"does your safety mean nothing to you?" he says a few seconds later, and violet sighs

"the party was like ten minutes away from my apartment luke. the chances of anything happening to me-"

"weren't zero. I don't care if the chances are 0.00001%, if there's ever a chance of anything happening to you, you never put yourself into that situation willingly," luke says, heart beating faster at the thought of what could've happened to her

"so I just shouldn't cross the road or get into a car ever again?" violet asks, making the point that there were never situations where you were 100% safe.

"don't get smart with me. you know you made a stupid choice tonight. you were drinking. it was late. you didn't tell anyone that were leaving or where you were going. you were vulnerable vi and you put yourself in a dangerous situation you didn't need to be in. not to mention you broke all of our going out rules. I spent a good twenty minutes looking for you. I texted. I called. nothing. I was worried out of my mind on the way over here," luke says and violet swallows thickly, feeling bad for worrying him.

"I didn't think it was that big of a deal. I didn't think you were gonna notice anyway. you were preoccupied so I left-"

"preoccupied?" luke asks, stepping closer and violet can tell he's close to losing the patience he's tried so desperately to hold onto the entire time

"with nancy, or nicole, or whatever her name is," violet says and realization dawns on luke as he walks over to violet standing between her thighs this time as she lifts her head to look at him

“are we done talking? this isn’t three meters,” violet says but her words get caught in her throat as luke’s hands rest on her bare things, squeezing gently

“you left because I was talking to nina?” luke asks

“nina, that’s the one, I really thought it was nancy,” violet says but luke doesn’t crack a smile like she wants him to.

“you were jealous,” luke accuses and violet scoffs, not meeting his eyes but he catches her chin, tilting her head back up so their eyes reconnect

“you left because you were jealous. admit it,” luke says, hand sliding to her cheek and she fights the urge to lean into it

“fine. I left because I was jealous. are we done arguing now?” violet asks and luke drops his hand, sending her a look she can’t decipher and walking towards the front door

“what are you doing?” violet asks, a hint of panic obvious in her voice as she realizes he’s leaving and she jumps off the table taking a few small steps and he sighs, turning back to her and walking until she’s in reach, cupping her cheeks gently between his palms

“I’m not doing this with you. I can’t. You made it perfectly clear last time that nothing serious was gonna happen between us. That you weren’t willing to risk it. I heard you loud and clear and I understand. And while I’ve been perfectly okay with accepting whatever you were willing to give me, I’m not gonna wait forever for you to change your mind,” luke says and violet frowns

“I never asked you to-“

“I know, but acting jealous when another girl flirts with me at a party is sending me mixed signals,” luke says and violet sighs

“I wasn’t trying to do that either. You know how I feel about you. I don’t say it because I can’t give you what you want. But you know. And I’m also aware that it’s unfair of me to ask you to wait until I’m ready to take that leap with you one day, when I might never be ready. Which is why I don’t expect you to wait. You’re free to flirt with as many nina’s as you wish. But I can’t stand there and watch it happen. That’s why I left. Because I know you have every right to give your heart to someone else, but I just can’t stand idly by and watch you do it,” violet says, a faint layer of tears misting over her eyes and luke shakes his head

“how you can say things like that when the only thing keeping us from being together, is you kingston. How unfair is it that even when you leave the room so that I’m able to give my heart to another girl, it walks right out the door with you. No matter how close or how far apart we are Vi, my heart and my head are always with you,” luke says, resting his forehead against hers and gently kissing her nose

“man this sucks,” luke says taking a shuddering breath

“I’m sorr-“ but luke’s lips on hers stop her from finishing her apology

“don’t apologize. not for this at least. I don’t like your reasoning, nor do I agree with it, and I pray like hell every day you’ll change your mind, but that doesn’t mean I don’t understand it. you can apologize for putting yourself in danger tonight though and for watching one tree hill without me,” luke says and violet laughs softly against his neck where he head is buried

“how’d you know? and I thought you didn’t like the show,” violet teases and luke sighs

“I just don’t like the crush you have on that Nick guy,” luke says

“nathan,” violet corrects and luke huffs

“nick. nathan. nancy. nina. all semantics.” luke says and violet laughs softly

“I totally understand if you don’t want to after everything that happened tonight but will you stay the night?” violet asks, resting her chin on luke’s chest and he wonders if she knows he can never deny her anything.

“yeah, but only if I get head and back scratches,”

“deal,” violet promises, kissing his chest before dragging him to bed.

[running-on-coffee-and-anxiety]

Notice But Hoping For The Best Part 4

Mister Lancer is the first person to truly say something is wrong with Daniel Fenton. That boy was never the most attentive student- He was loud and prone to goofing off with his friends in the back, though he wasn't too disruptive- but he was a good student. If it was a topic he was passionate about, such as science- something he certainly got from his parents- or when they covered the stars? He went from being a good student to one of the best, though he never quite beat his older sister Jasmine's performances.

Which was why the change was enough to spot and be a cause for genuine concern; at least, now it was. Though it may not seem like it, and though he may struggle to be unbiased, Lancer truly cared for his students. So when Danny started turning in work with poor handwriting that was at times hard to read, he started grading harsher. When he started sleeping in class, he made sure to wake the boy up and at the very least give him a mild verbal slap on the wrist. It seemed like the youngest Fenton was randomly deciding to slack off, which Lancer would not tolerate in his class!

Then the worry started to set in as his condition slowly, day by day, ended up deteriorating. At first, it was the messier clothes, the food-stained shirt and poorly tied shoes. Alright, miss Manson was probably the one behind his style, then, and her family randomly deciding to extend their trip meant clothes likely weren't Daniel's first concern. But then it became more serious, looking like he was struggling to brush his hair before coming to school, small tics with his hands- well, usually only his left hand- that he quickly pressed the other hand to suppress and hide, and random twitches that seemed to be focused more around his left side, but were echoed- albeit much weaker- on his right as well. The fact it seemed to coincide with the decreasing quality of his handwriting was very telling, and the fact the deterioration started when the ghosts began attacking... It was easy to sense something was going to break soon.

The break was both sooner- and more literal- than expected, when they were doing a lab for science class. Everything was going normally, Lancer wasn't paying close attention to anyone in particular, he simply happened to glance over at the youngest Fenton. Because of that, he was the only one to see his arm spasm, his fingers twitch and open reflexively- unwillingly. It was the breaking of the beaker that made everyone else turn to look after that. "Danny, clean up the glass and see me after class- and for the love of Shakespeare, don't handle any more of the glassware." He almost felt guilty after seeing just how close to tears that boy was at the order.

Daniel looked like he'd just predicted yet another ghost attack as he stood by his desk after class. Usually it would be a lecture, a detention, some form of punishment- but not today. Given who his parents were, what their jobs were and the fact the Fentons were targeting the ghosts with so much aggression- they were zealous in their work even before, but now there was a concern this was something much more personal. "Calm down, you're not in trouble-" Perhaps he had been a bit too harsh, given how the dark haired teen suddenly relaxed, as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. "-we just need to talk about something."

Asking about what had happened with the ghosts and what sort of injury they had caused Danny felt personal. Especially since his parents were so aggressive about going after the ectoplasmic creatures now. Lancer knew he needed to be diplomatic about this, for once carefully selecting his words. "I won't ask for any details, but clearly something has happened." It seemed his student was growing anxious again, but he continued. "I have been harsh due to believing you were slacking off, but if this is a genuine problem, it's my job as an educator to make sure any special requirements you have are met. Now, the ban on you handling glassware will exist and stay in place-" There was an almost painful look of loss in Danny's eyes at that. "-however, you will be given paper assignments you can fill out instead of doing the lab. Partner with someone and watch the experiment, then fill out the sheet your given. Every time you submit a written assignment, I would like you to stay back and help me read it; your handwriting is like another language to me. Understood?" A nod. Daniel was never this silent... It was disconcerting. "Good. You're dismissed." The only words were a mumbled 'thank you' before he left. It was almost... Heartbreaking.

Lancer noticed, he would try to assist, but he could only hope for the best. After all, the Fentons were taking care of things, and while they were... wild, to put it mildly, they were good people. Of course they'd get their son the proper care.

Previous Next

[ssa-atlas-alvez]

Pancakes Solve Everything (Spencer Reid x Reader)

This is a part of the christmas exchange! This is a gift for @c-m-stuff I hope you like it! @cmgiftexchange

Happy holidays! I hope you like it, this is the first thing I’ve written in a hot minute and the first fic I’ve posted in ages aha! Also, I hope you don't mind, it came out a little more gender neutral aha

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, drunk-ish (not really),

You sigh, running a hand over your face as you turn to Spencer. “I'm worried about Olivia,” 

Spencer paused his making of his coffee and turned to you. “Me too.” 

You look at him, dark rings around his eyes, hair slightly messier than usual. The stress made him look a few years older.

“I don't think that Ryder is a good influence,” You said, grabbing your favourite mug from the cupboard. “She's changed since they started dating.”

“I know. I had Garcia look him up but she couldn't find anything.” Spencer admitted.

“You ran a background check?” You asked with a soft laugh.

“Hey, I want to know who our daughter is dating.” Spencer said. “Besides, nothing came up. Yet… I've asked her to dig a little deeper.”

You huff a small laugh, “And if nothing turns up on Garcia's deep dive?”

“It has to be him.” Spencer says, shaking his head. “She was fine until she went to college and met him,”

“Don't get me wrong, we all partied in college- well, you didn't, you were like nine though so that doesn't count-” 

“Hey, I was fourteen-”

“Nine, fourteen, same thing,” You shrugged, “But anyway, we all party in college, but it was supposed to settle down and, well… it's not settling.”

Spencer sighed, resuming his coffee making. “I think we need to talk to her,” 

As if on cue, your daughter stumbles through the front door. Drunk. “Hey guys,” She says, giving a small wave as she continues to stumble pass you.

“Maybe when she’s sober,” You said, turning back to your husband - who gives a tight nod. “I’ll help her into bed - but I expect you to be getting the pancake mix out of the cupboard while I do so.”

“You got it Chef,” Spencer says with a laugh.

You rolled your eyes with a smile as you made your way to your daughter’s bedroom. Whilst she didn’t live here during college, you made sure to leave her room so she could come back during holidays and after college - if that was what she wanted.

You gently knocked on the door, “Olivia? Honey?” You call out gently. With yet another sigh, you open the door. 

Your daughter was already asleep, face down on her bed, still in the clothes she left in last night. You decide to take her shoes off first, placing them at the foot of the bed. You then place a pillow under her head and a blanket over her body. Next was grabbing the trash can from her bathroom and placing it close to her at the side of her bed. With one last look at your daughter, you head back into the kitchen, leaving the door slightly open in case she needs anything.

“She’s out for the count,” You said, plucking your now full mug from the counter. 

“Already?”

“She was already asleep when I got there,” You say, taking a sip. Spencer shot you a worried look. “It’s alright, Spence, we’ll sort this out. She’ll be okay,”

“I don’t think she should be with Ryder anymore. I know she’s an adult, but…”

“But you’re her dad and you can’t help but worry?” You asked, a small smile playing on your lips, despite the situation. “I know. We’ll sort it out, I promise.” 

“I know we will,”

Your daughter woke up a few hours later, walking into the room silent but groggy as she poured herself a cup of coffee - sitting down at the breakfast bar. You and Spencer shared a look as you rose to sit opposite her.

“Olivia? We need to talk-”

“I think I need help,” Olivia said softly, cutting you off. “I- I don’t think I want to act like this anymore and I think I need help in stopping,” 

Spencer nods, “That’s good, it’s good that you’re reaching out,” Spencer replied, taking her hand softly, giving it a small squeeze. “We’re you’re parents, we’re here to help you,”

“Thank you,”

“We’re here for you, every step of the way,” You said placing your hand on her arm, “I love you,”

“I love you too,” Olivia said with a small sniff. There was a moment of silence, “I think I should break up with Ryder,” 

You both nod, “Whatever you think you need to do for you, sweetie,” You say, voice soothing.

“You guys aren’t mad?”

“You’re an adult, Olivia, but you’re young and we all make mistakes, we all fall down rabbit holes, it’s about accepting help to climb back out,” Spencer says.

“Your father always has such a way with words,” You joked lightly, Spencer and Olivia both huffing small laughs. “Right, who wants pancakes?”

"Pancakes?" Spencer raises an eyebrow.

"Yes, pancakes. They solve everything."

"I can't really argue with that one," Spencer says with a nod.

Soon enough, you were all sat with a mound of pancakes each.

“Are we going to address the elephant in the room?” Olivia asks nervously.

“Yeah, you did way too many pancakes,” Spencer nodded.

Olivia huffed a small laugh, “I meant about the whole acting crazy at college thing, but you did go overboard with the pancakes.”

“Hey, I stress Cook, leave me be.” You laughed. “And we can talk about the college thing whenever you'd like, if that's right now, we can talk now. If that's after pancakes, we can talk after pancakes.”

“Is now okay?” She asks softly.

“Of course.”

“I want to break up with Ryder.” She says, twirling her fork. “I've been wanting to break up with him for a while, but I've been… worried about about it.”

“What's made you worried, sweetheart?” Spencer asked.

“I don't want to be alone,” Olivia says, “I know that sounds stupid-”

“It doesn't sound stupid at all.” You're quick to reassure her. “You're young, you're learning. Your Uncle Derek running into a door and forgetting to kick it is stupid. You're experiencing the world as an adult for the first time.”

Olivia and Spencer both huffed a laugh at the reminder of Derek. “I'll tell him that at work on Monday,” Spencer teases.

“Yeah? Also tell him that he may be your work husband but you're my actual husband so he needs to stop stealing you for cases,”

[maryannecrimsworth]

Little Spider Show

Part 1 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10

Guide for tormented hearts

Pairing: Wednesday Addams x Selective mute Reader

Warnings: anxiety crisis; another bullying(I mean, revenge) scene;

Summary: You are not the one who forgets. Not when they called you worthless for no reason and made you vomit in the middle of the hallway. So as soon as you woke up and your brother unlocked your cell, you knew exactly how to take revenge. Your plan was going to work perfectly — until Wednesday sat beside you. But you had no idea that her plan would be so much better than yours.

Hank was staring directly at you when you sat up inside the cage. You were still dirty and wearing Nevermore’s uniform, but you felt great. Your head was light and your eyes moved softly, none of it hurt nor ached. Even your jaw and teeth, which used to be sore every time you woke up, did not hurt at all. Seriously, you were smiling before you met your brother’s gaze.

"Good morning." His voice was low. Too low. Hank has gotten tired of asking how your night was and how you were feeling, so he always remained in silence as he unlocked your cage. Was it a good night or bad one? "Are you going to school today?" His tone was soft. So soft. Hank only spoke like this with students and fragile people. He wouldn't speak with you like that. Unless the night was terrible.

"Yes. " Your throat was dry and your voice was hoarse but you kept going. "Are you not?"

There were dark circles under his eyes and his hair was messier than usual. Hank walked away from you, pacing loudly and slowly around the room while his hands ran through his hair frantically. "I know about yesterday." You swore a hairball fell from his head. "I will talk with these girls and I—"

"Wow, Enid really deserves the 'gossip queen' title, doesn't she?" You walked over your closet. "It's alright, Han, we know this would happen sooner or later."

"No!" He retorted. "No, none of it is supposed to happen. I promised you that I would keep you safe and—"

"We are fucked up, Hank." You turned towards him with your clothes in your hands. "We are odd and devilish and there will always be these stupid people to bother us." Hank swallowed dryly because of your words, guilt heavily falling upon his shoulder. "And it's fine by me. I'm safe. I like Nevermore." You smiled at him. "Don't get involved, please. I can handle it." They would pay for it, you thought, but your kind smile did fool Hank. 

"Okay." He sighed. "Okay, go take a bath and brush your teeth. We're having coffee at the Weathervane."

X

“What is it?” You asked as Hank delivered you a hot mug. The liquid was light brown with a bit of cream on top of it — this was not your order. You're supposed to drink milk, pure milk, as you have done your whole life.

“Latte.” you snorted and pushed the mug away. “What?”

“Mama said I can’t have coffee.”

“Mama can rot in hell, Y/N.” His dark voice startled you. “Sorry. Look, she never wanted you to have coffee because you are more useful asleep. You were more useful.” You could see Hank scolding himself internally. “Try it. I’m sure you’re going to like it.” Hank winked and you said nothing. “It will help you to stay awake longer.” 

This argument was enough to make you grab the mug and drink it all at once. Your whole face turned red as some of the boiling liquid ran out of your lips.

“I burned myself.” You whined, painting and cleaning your mouth with your sleeve. 

“Of course you did.” Hank pulled your ear. “You moron.”

X

The morning went on without much problem. You could swear someone roared behind your back but, as always, your focus remained on the teacher speaking, not on your incredibly pleasant classmates. The Biology and Chemistry classes passed smoothly: you held your pen with one hand and your notebook with the other, writing diligently so as not to raise any worries from your teacher. But, your notes had nothing to do with the words on the black board — you were writing down all the items you needed for your plan, not caring much about the ionic bonds and mammals. 

Until the lunch break, you needed to gather, somehow, a ipecac leaf and find a plant dehydrator. You figured you might have luck if you took a trip to the greenhouse, even though your brother had forbidden you to go there. Well, the worst that could happen to you was another pull on your ear — so you decided: you would go to the greenhouse, you only needed to wait for the bell to ring again and then sneak out the class. 

You smiled to yourself and closed your notebook when a pair of eyes made your skin burn. You lifted your head and looked at the teacher. 

“Our next exam is going to be a pair research.” He said, probably not for the first time. “Are you comfortable with your pairing?” His eyes dropped to the figure sitting beside you. You followed the teacher’s gaze and — you held your breath instinctively — Wednesday Addams was staring at you this whole time. Why haven't you been left alone this time? You had been released from pair work from the very first day. And it was just a research paper, you saw the topic written on the board, you could do it all by yourself and— wait, why wasn't Wednesday blinking?

“Be careful what you wish for, Mr. Torres. The mad scientist and her little helper puppy can become the duo of your nightmares!” The class laughed because of that same shrill voice of yesterday. So…you supposed you were the puppy? 

What was this girl's obsession with calling you a dog? It was your brother who trained werewolves! 

“A mad scientist usually has a monster at their disposal.” A cold voice struck back and everyone turned to its owner. Of course Wednesday wouldn't keep it shut. “I can confirm it.”

Some students squealed and laughed at the expression of fear that made the shrill-voiced girl pale.

“Silence!” Mrs.Torres tried to regain control of the class.“Mrs. L/N?” You tried to look up at the teacher again, but everyone’s gaze was on you. The laughter did not stop and the whispers grew louder as Wednesday kept sitting gracefully by your side. She was all that: confident, scary and strong-minded — while you could not even force yourself to answer the teacher. An expectant silence dominated the room as the professor's eyes remained on you. “Are…you…comfortable…with…your…pairing?” He asked ridiculously slower, as if you had some kind of retardation or deafness. Now the entire class looked at you as if you indeed had it. Even Wednesday’s gaze got bewildered as your sweat started to drop on your desk. 

Of course I’m not comfortable, I am never comfortable with these purple-dressed teenagers around me.  

You tried to swallow the knot that came up in your throat, but the movement made you cough instantly. Your mouth and throat were so dry that a painful itch spread all over your neck and you weren’t able to breathe anymore. Your whole body was shaken by the coughing as you covered your lips and sprinted out the room. 

You heard loud laughs while you rushed down the hallway, looking for the nearest toilet with the air being violently expelled from your lungs. Your abdomen and chest were already shaking with spasms by the time you broke into the restroom and sank your head into the sink. You turned on the tap and drank the water in quick sips, guiding the water to your lips with your hands. 

Your face and vest were already soaked when the bell rang loudly through the whole school. Fuck. The lunch break. You lost the opportunity, you couldn't make it to the greenhouse. Your plan was ruined. No one was going to take revenge today. Perhaps it really was a dish that should be served cold.

“L/N.” Speaking in coldness, guess who followed you. Your cheeks were still wet as you turned to Wednesday. In fact, you didn't want to, but she keeps coming up beside you and you can't stop yourself from turning around. “You ruined my message.”

Oh, fuck you. And you ruined my plan, so we’re even. What about it?

You stomped over the door and tried to close it. 

“This is the female restroom.” She noted, her fist closed around the knob as your hand pushed the knob on the other side. You tried to slam the door one more time, but she held it open. “It is you who should leave.” So you did. You wriggled out of the doorway, without even touching Wednesday's uniform, and stepped back into the hallway. 

The hallway now full of students heading to the canteen, talking and laughing and walking together in these huge packs of purple people. Someone stepped on your foot as you tried to control your breathing. It didn’t even hurt, but you walked back in reflex and your back hitted someone. It hitted Wednesday. 

"Follow me." She said after unseaming the small crease you made in her skirt. 

She paced determinedly down the hall and you followed, soon reaching the quad full of students. Curiously, she stopped and stood at a distance from the tables and the water fountain. Silence filled the space between you and you found yourself obliged to analyze her face after explanations. Her eyes wandered precisely through the quad, following a moving-target as a twist took over her lips. A smirk?

A loud scream made you look away: and then you saw. Oh, what a beautiful image you saw! The shrill-voiced girl was screaming for her life in the middle of the courtyard. A dozen spiders emerged from her plate and were now crawling up her chest and face. None of her slaps and screams stopped the arachnids from stepping over her skin. Now, all eyes were on her and everyone within thirty feet could hear her screams for help. 

Your plan might have been ruined, but Wednesday’s plan was way more satisfying.

You laughed delightedly as the girl squirmed on the floor, a loud, husky laugh coming from your lips that made Wednesday's little smile grow. She watched you attentively as your eyes gleamed because of the scene in front of you.

You were having the time of your life before a voice emerged from behind.

“Y/N.” 

It was Hank. Fuck.

X

“You’re walking on thin ice with the principal, Wednesday.” Hank said from behind his desk, his hands sunk into the wood. “You've already been suspended once, and I’m not sure if you will get away with this little spider show of yours.” Hank stared down at her, who was sitting beside his brother with her typically straight posture. Her hands were on her lap and her knees were knit together, her chin up in defiance. And you were mirroring her posture without even noticing. Hank tried to not gasp at you as he went on. “What was that for, after all?”

“They’ve ruined our correspondence.” She told him coldly. “Now I’m late.”

It was a weird deal they had. Like, Wednesday would only go to Jericho with Hank or then driving his moto. They also shared these secret, encrypted notes in the meantime. Was it a mystery solving competition? And she was now late with the riddles? It sounded like something Hank would do to keep a friend out of trouble. He used to do it with you. 

"Bullshit. You avenged Y/N, didn’t you?” Wednesday shifted slightly on her seat because of Hank’s words. “We’ve talked about this, corbeau, you can’t keep righting wrongs around here.”

Corbeau? Was she a raven? A psychic? Is that why Hank always grits his teeth around her? His curse gets worse around psychics. 

“Then you should perform your function properly and take care of these miserable beings.” You looked at her with widened eyes. “They’re bothering your brother and you did nothing.” Why was she bothered about it? She doesn't even know you. 

“You exhaust me, Wednesday.” Hank sighed, with his slumped shoulders and slow hand gestures accepting the defeat. So…they were friends? Hank has never lost an argument so quickly. 

“Did you know about it, Y/N?” After almost an hour scolding the Addams, he finally turned to you. “Did you plan out this thing together?” 

You shook your head and Hank frowned. Yes, you answered, and you could feel Wednesday's eyes on you. 

You were lying, of course — you had no idea about what she intended to do nor why she did it — but you adored it and you wouldn’t let her be penalized alone.

“So it's decided!” Hank did not seem happy. “You two will assist the school clubs for the next two weeks.” It didn’t sound bad. “And apologize.” Now it sounded horrible.

Wednesday fought back again and their discussion restarted. You didn’t really pay attention to what they were saying — you knew your brother wouldn’t go back. So your fingers went down your jacket as well as your eyes, and you began to twist the buttons of your clothes as the discussion dragged on for another half hour. 

A thud then came from the door behind you and you noticed Hank was gone. In an impulsive movement, you grabbed a paper and a pencil from your brother’s desk as Wednesday headed to the door. 

She was already leaving when you held out the paper for her. Please, turn around, turn around and look at—

“I—” Your voice got stuck in your throat as your mind ran widely in thoughts. What are you supposed to say? Could you say anything to her? What if you got it all wrong and she still wanted to kill you? Did she want to kill you in the first place?

Thankfully, your stutter was enough to make her turn her face toward you and see the paper in your hand. This time, you delivered the message without being crushed or wet.

Your note only said:

'Thank you.'

Then you ran away.

Taglist: @i984 @toournextadventure @cursedchar @aroaceanxietylemon @tundra1029 @efectoangel @sweetaimu @colezb @tnnadia @elduster @rainbowsixreader

[ovwechoes]

I love your writing! can you do one with Mauga and roadhog please...? 🥺

Chainbreaker / Mauga x Roadhog Headcanons (SFW) I've never seen this ship before, so I'm happy to write for them. Thank you for the ask and they're below the cut, enjoy!

How'd they meet? What were their first impressions of each other? They probably met whilst Mako was assisting Jamison on a heist, and Maugaloa was on a mission with Talon. It was as though fate crossed their paths, even when at first Mako didn't take a second look at Maugaloa, not considering him important enough to think twice about. It wasn't until Maugaloa had to speak to him first, that their bond grew more. With Mako's assistance and compliance, Maugaloa was able to successfully complete their mission and that's what initiated him to ask for Mako's contacts, so that if he needs any further help he can call on him. With some reluctance, he provided, thinking that it might help him and Jamison come into more money in the future. 

Who confessed? How did it go? Maugaloa definitely did, after months of silently pining for Mako without any idea of how he felt for him. All he knew was that he wanted the feelings gone if they were unrequited, and so the confession happened when he asked Mako if he was free to speak to him, and meet him at a dodgy location. It didn't help that when he got there, Mako wasn't wearing his usual mask, meaning he knew this wasn't a work meeting but something else. It's weird how much Maugaloa felt as though Mako could see right through him, and could understand him better than he could himself. The confession was messier than any he had in the past, full of stutters and ‘let me rephrase' from Maugaloa, with Mako listening in silence. When done, Mako said he felt something but wasn't sure what it was, and asked for some time to consider things more before giving an answer. It made Maugaloa feel anxious, worried that he was buying himself time to ghost, but after 2 days of conversations with Jamison and consideration of what this would mean for him, Mako accepted his confession but asked that they keep things slow, not rushing anything. Thus, the relationship started completely different to any that Maugaloa had experienced before, and he was thankful for that as it made things feel meaningful and different between the two of them.

What's their favourite attribute about each other? Mako likes Maugaloa's confidence, and appreciates how he knows he's everything he gloats about being and will happily flaunt it. Usually, he finds people like Maugaloa conceited, often seeing their words as a cover up for their lack of abilities, but with Maugaloa this is completely different for him. It's something Mako can appreciate, and he likes being with someone he doesn't have to parent through insecurities (like he has to with Jamison). Mako's own self confidence has only grown throughout the relationship, and he views their time together as valuable for this reason. Maugaloa, on the other hand, loves the pride that Mako takes with his heritage, and his indigenous routes of Australia. He enjoys how much confidence Mako has about this, and how happily he'll stand up for his roots in the face of racism or xenophobia. It's something that Maugaloa's struggled with in the past, often not understanding why it was happening and internalising it when he was much younger. So, having a partner that understands the pain from the rude comments and racism, and yet still holds so much love for their cultural roots is important for him. It's made him feel seen, and comfortable with him as though he could scream that he's indigenous and wouldn't be hurt in the process because Mako would protect him, just as Maugaloa would protect him.

Do they go on holiday? If so, where to? I like to think they do, or at least make plans to meet in the middle of their own missions and work obligations, so that they can spend time with each other as much as possible. They don't care where they end up finding themselves, as long as they're with one another it doesn't matter. They've often been to Belgium, Sweden, New Zealand, Singapore, and Taiwan. They love exploring new places away from their own homes, and like to explore new historical places that they never expected - but the actual location doesn't matter to them. For Mako, he only cares about convenience with getting to said destination, and Maugaloa only cares about what excuse he'll make for slipping out of Talon's sights for the next couple days.

What do their friends and family think of each other/their relationship? Mako would've only told Jamison about the relationship after asking him if he should explore his feelings for Maugaloa properly, or not bother. He values his friend and work partner's opinions, even if they're scattered and overdramatic. It's important for Mako to have acceptance from Jamison, though, and he would want to feel supported and able to come to him if problems arise. Jamison was over the moon, happy that Mako finally let someone else into his heart. He was slightly jealous, though, as if he was the child of Mako watching them meet someone new that would take all their time. It was something he got concerned with at first, but when he finally met Maugaloa and he joked that Jamison was like their child, it made him feel better about the issue. He appreciates how Maugaloa doesn't judge them though, and the humour that Maugaloa shares with Jamison. On the other hand, Maugaloa would tell Moira and Sombra about the relationship - he would tell Sombra because eventually, without a doubt, she'd find out anyways and he would only tell Moira because Sombra would come to her first when finding out about the relationship. By telling them both, it was killing two birds with one stone. He wasn't concerned about their reactions, opinions, etc. and he believes that his happiness comes before their approval, not needing them to validate his decisions as if he isn't smart enough to consider them before enacting them. However, they were supportive and more so curious about how Mako would even like Maugaloa back, using this new information to tease him relentlessly. Though, they do cover for him on the off chance that he slips out at night from the Talon HQ, as he's proven loyal to the organisation so they're not worried about what might happen whilst he's spending time with Mako.

[ask-obey-me-boys]

How would the brothers react to Autistic MC?

He knows about Autism and how it affects humans . Will try his best to make you comfortable. He will explain things to you no matter how many times you ask him . He will talk to Diavolo about your condition and how it could affect your performance at RAD.

He doesn't know what Autism is and you'll have to explain it to him. At first he would tease you for some things but the minute you tell him, he's gonna be your personal bodyguard. He will throw hands for you.

Honestly Levi is lowkey autistic too. So when he hears about your condition he's gonna be like omg same pinch bestie! He understands that you might find it difficult to interact with other people or take time to understand things because he goes through that too. Oh you don't like the bright lights in his room? He's turning them down just for you.

He's studied a lot about human mental health and conditions. He knows about Autism the best and so he's gonna try and help you with your difficulties. Oh you didn't understand this thing? Don't worry he'll explain it to you till you get it. Smacks Mammon if he's being too loud because he knows that Loud noises might make you uncomfortable and so he's gonna try and keep his cool as well.

Asmo is a really expressive person and he often talks about things to you, that includes him crying his heart out because he broke his nail or because his hair doesn't look good. And you just don't know what to say to him and that's gonna make him more upset because why aren't you giving him all your attention and comforting him. Asked Solomon about it and got to know about your condition and there he is, trying to make you be more expressive and how to handle other's feelings because who is better than Asmo about these things.

Explain it to him #2 . He was already protective of you now he's gonna pay extra attention to you. No mc you can't bite Little D, he's not tasty, trust him he's probably tried it before. Beel is not that expressive about his emotions and he sometimes takes time to understand things himself, but he's gonna try his best for you.

One might think he's Autistic too but no he's just emo. He probably knows about this stuff, what else do you think he did all that time in the attic other than sleep? He will act like he doesn't care, but What do you mean the lower demons that were poking fun at you for being slow in understanding things were found in the HOL backyard? The attic looks a little bit messier than usual? Hmm? Is that a knife Belphie? A bloodied knife?!

[channiebelly]

hello so i have a request please, if you’d be willing to write so joshua gets homesick and misses american food, and the member of your choice sees this and so starts cooking american foods for him all the time causing him to gain weight from the sudden influx of greasy and fattening foods 😌 ok thank you!! welcome to our lil community!

oooh this is such a good one!!! can't believe i just wrote over 2k words in one sitting. i hope you like it :D

warning: stuffing, weight gain kink.

ship: joshua/chan

word count: 2.1k

Joshua has been sad lately; it's been very obvious.

He's been staying inside a lot more, and he just has a dejected air around him, not the overall cheerful vibe he's usually known for.

"Joshua, is everything okay?" Chan asks after visiting his apartment one day. Joshua is dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie and his hair doesn't look like it's been brushed in days.

"I'm fine," he says.

"No, you're not," Chan replied. "You're always there for me, so let me be there for you for once. Please tell me what's wrong." Chan takes Joshua's hand in his and pats it, trying to be comforting.

"I miss America. I miss my friends and my mom and speaking English and the food."

"Oh, Josh," Chan says and he pulls Joshua in for a hug. Joshua goes lax against him and hugs him back tightly. Chan can feel how sad he is just from that. "Let's hang out tonight."

-

The next day, Chan hatches a plan. He can't bring Joshua's friends or family to Seoul, and his English is terrible, but he can do something about the food.

Chan isn't a great cook, but he's okay. He spends all day watching videos on how to create the perfect American burger and then he takes himself off to the supermarket.

"Back again?" Joshua says when he opens the front door of his apartment. He's wearing the same clothes as yesterday and his hair is even messier.

"I'm going to make you dinner," Chan says, lifting up the shopping bag he's carrying.

"You don't have to do that," Joshua says. "I can cook for myself."

"I want to," Chan says. "Just relax."

Joshua smiles and lets him in.

Cooking goes a lot better than Chan expected. The videos he watched were very helpful and he manages to make an amazing burger, if he does say so himself. It's very large, because he knows that American portions are massive and he uses tons of sauce. He pairs it with a similarly large glass of pepsi (with a straw for the restaurant effect). He wanted to add fries too but he doesn't own a deep fryer so they would never taste authentic.

He puts it on the dining table and calls Joshua over.

"Wow, Chan, this looks amazing," Joshua says, looking genuinely awed.

"I know it's big, so don't worry if you don't finish it," Chan says.

"It's perfect," Joshua sits down. "Are you going to have any?"

"Ah, I have dance practice tomorrow so I can't eat anything too heavy. I brought a salad over."

"Fair enough," Joshua says and then he starts eating.

They keep up a steady conversation through dinner and soon Joshua has finished the burger and the drink.

"Wow, hyung. I didn't know you could eat that much!"

"It's my American training." Then, to Chan's surprise, Joshua leans back in his chair and starts rubbing his belly. His hoodie is oversized, so it is only now that Chan can see full Joshua's belly is. It's distended and has formed a small dome, replacing Joshua's usually flat stomach. Joshua groans as he does so.

"I brought dessert too, but we don't have to eat it if you're full." Chan had initially brought the icecream and toppings for Joshua to eat another night, but suddenly he's curious about how much Joshua can pack into his stomach.

"Maybe in a little bit, I need to digest this first." Joshua groans as he gets to his feet. "I forgot what it's like to feel this full. Why don't we watch some TV in the meantime."

They sit on the couch and Chan cuddles into Joshua's side.

An hour or so later, Chan thinks that Joshua has forgotten all about the dessert, but he hasn't.

"Is that dessert still on the table?" he asks.

"Definitely. Let me go get you a bowl," Chan says.

"Thank you Channie."

Chan goes into the kitchen and finds a big bowl. He'd found a picture of an American ice cream sundae online and he was determined to recreate it. He adds three big scoops of ice cream, covers it in a thick layer of chocolate sauce and then adds crushed nuts and sprinkles before topping it off with a cherry.

When he takes it out to Joshua, his eyes widen.

"Wow, Chan. That looks incredible. Thank you."

He takes it out of Chan's hands and immediately startes to eat it.

It's gone before Chan can blink. Wow. It was massive, Chan was not expecting that.

Joshua leans backwards on the couch and starts rubbing his belly again. Chan stares. He kind of wants to touch, but he doesn't want to cross a line.

At the end of the episode, Chan gets up to go home.

"Thank you so much, this was so nice of you. I feel a lot better now," Joshua says. Chan wants to be able to respond properly, but all he can think about is how he can see Joshua's full stomach through the hoodie now. It's only small, and you wouldn't know to look for it if you hadn't seen how much Joshua had eaten, but it's definitely there, pushing the fabric of the hoodie out.

"Anytime, hyung," Chan says. And he flees.

-

It becomes a common occurance. Chan comes over two or three nights a week to cook for Joshua and then just hang out.

He tries lots of different American foods, different styles of burgers, pizzas and even pushes himself to make harder things like ribs. He buys a deep fryer at some point so that Joshua can have the proper side dish of fries with every meal. Chan knows how important side dishes are.

Chan even starts adding more elaborate desserts that he'll bake at home before going over, things like cakes and pies. He's becoming a very good chef.

Everytime, no matter how big the meal is, Joshua finishes it. It's honestly amazing. Chan has to stop himself from sitting and just staring while Joshua eats. And then Chan is treated to the sight of Joshua rubbing his full belly with no shame. Chan can see just how big Joshua's belly is able to stretch and how little it moves when Joshua pushes his fingers in to try and relieve some pressure, showing just how full he is. And Chan might be going crazy, but he thinks that Joshua's stomach is getting bigger, but it's hard to tell when Joshua always wears baggy clothes.

Joshua moves slower when he's full, and he sits down on the couch slowly, as though he's afraid of jostling his stomach too much.

One night, after Joshua somehow manages to eat a full pie, Chan offers to rub his belly for him. Joshua agrees, and then for the first time Chan has his hands on his belly.

He's surprised just by how full he is. Chan doesn't apply too much pressure, but he can tell that there's almost no give to Joshua's stomach. It's also bigger than he thought. Now that he's able to map it out with his own hands he's surprised by it's width and just how far it bulges out.

-

After a few months of doing this, Chan shows up to Joshua's house again, this time with a heavy chocolate cake he was especially proud of, as well as a plan to make barbacue wings.

Joshua is wearing the same hoodie he wore the first night Chan came over. Except this time, Chan can see Joshua's stomach pressing against it before he's even started eating. And this time it's not subtle. Anyone who saw Joshua would be able to tell he had a belly under there. How did he not notice how big Joshua was getting?

Chan feels a rush flood through his body. He did that to Joshua? He's been feeding Joshua so well that he's developed a permanent belly that anyone can see? He wonders if Joshua's noticed. He doesn't seem to embarrassed about it.

Chan goes to the kitchen and begins to unpack. Joshua usually hangs out there while Chan cooks, just chatting. He stopped asking if he could help after being refused a couple of times, and now he just accepts being pampered.

"Hold on. I'm going to go change into a t-shirt," Joshua says.

Chan is surprised. Joshua runs cold; he's almost always wearing a sweater.

When Joshua comes back wearing a white t-shirt, Chan is treated to a view of just how much Joshua's body has changed. His arms are bigger, almost filling out the tshirt, and his belly is pushing against the t-shirt so much that Chan can see exactly where his belly button is. The waistband of his sweatpants is stretched out almost as far as it can go, and the drawstring is just dangling. There's no need to tie it when Joshua's tummy is keeping them held up.

Chan doesn't notice that he's staring.

Joshua laughs awkwardly. "This?" he says, placing a hand on the underside of his belly and jiggling it slightly. "You've been feeding me well. And I've been hungrier recently, I think."

"You look good, hyung." He does look good. The weight suits him well, and he's been smiling more. Chan is happy that he can do this for him.

Joshua blushes, a response that Chan never thought he would get from him. "Thank you." Then he takes his seat and Chan goes back to cooking.

Joshua finishes all the wings and fries easily, as well as two massive glasses of pepsi. This is no longer a surprise to Chan. But this time he asks for dessert straight away, while they're still at the table.

Chan brings the cake out and Joshua fawns over it, telling Chan what a good job he did. Chan cuts him a big slice, which Joshua finishes, so Chan cuts him another one.

And then he's done. He leans back in the chair and does his usual routine of rubbing his belly, except this time, Chan can see exactly how full he is and how big his stomach is. It looks heavy and packed full, and when Joshua gives an experimental jiggle, it barely moves. The jiggling causes the tshirt to ride up a little, and Chan is treated to a flash of the smooth, taut skin of Joshua's underbelly. He even thinks he spots a stretchmark.

They move to sit on the couch, and Chan rubs Joshua's belly. He doesn't even have to ask anymore if Joshua wants it. Now, Josua just accepts it.

After a few episodes of the show they're watching, Joshua speaks up.

"Is there any more cake?" Joshua asks.

Chan is in shock. He's hands are currently on Joshua's belly, he can feel how little room he has.

"Of course," Chan says and he gets up to grab Joshua a slice.

Joshua eats it quickly and then asks for another one, and then another. By the time he's done, only a quarter of the cake is left.

Chan has never felt Joshua more full, and he's breathing shallowly.

"Sorry, that cake is just so good," he says. Chan keeps rubbing big, soothing circles into his belly, feeling the slight gurgles of his stomach.

"I'm happy you enjoyed it," Chan asks. "You can save the last piece for tomorrow."

When it's time for Chan to go home, Joshua is still groaning from fullness. Chan tells him that he can stay on the couch, but Joshua insists on walking him to the door. Chan watches as Joshua struggles to his feet, taking a couple of tries, and then as he keeps rubbing his stomach as they walk to the door.

"Good night Chan," Joshua says.

"Good night Josh." And then Chan gives Joshua's stomach a pat. "Good night Mr Belly."

"You brat," Joshua says. They're both laughing.

As Chan walks home, he wonders how big he can get Joshua. He doesn't think he's outgrown any of his clothes yet. Maybe that can be Chan's goal. His private goal, Joshua doesn't have to know.

The next morning, Joshua sends Chan a picture of him eating the cake.

Thanks for breakfast!

Oh, this will be easy.

[theaceofflamesposts]

Thatch - 49, 59, 63

49. "C'mon, I'll show you how to dance." 59. "I like the way your hand fits in mine." 63. "Wait, don't pull away... Not yet."

For: Sefona

You’ve never seen men that dance the way they do on the Moby Dick before. It’s not just movement to noise – some of it is, sure, just arms around shoulders and swaying while they sing (often off-key at this point because they’re a bit drunk) – but proper dancing. Izou is at the centre of it, moving perfectly with the beat, sometimes on his own but occasionally with others too. It’s kind of fun to watch how flushed Ace gets when Izou does something like dipping him. Haruta is light on his feet, and some of the men who were Spade pirates under Ace prior to joining Whitebeard are also great dancers. Cornelia and Deuce in particular, but for a big guy Skull is also pretty good at keeping rhythm.

Marco usually waits patiently to join in until he sees a place to dance with both Ace and Izou at once, and often Thatch joins in like the four of them just know how to move in sync with one another. You wonder briefly if the dancing helps with being able to fight together. Mostly you just like the joy they all seem to show with one another. You’re not sure where Thatch is yet, but a presence just behind you to your left solves the internal query a moment later.

“You never join in.” He says, studying you quietly. His hair is a little messier than usual and it makes you want to run your fingers through it until it’s loose and hanging free. Maybe later.

“I – I don’t really know how to dance.” You confess, cheeks getting warm. Thatch just smiles at you though.

“Come on. I’ll show you how to dance.” He offers you a hand, and although you glance nervously at your dancing crew mates, you slide your hand into his. Thatch beams as he leads you closer to all the others, tugging you in closer to him until you rest a hand on his chest. His free hand drops to your waist before he leans in.

“Don’t worry about anyone else, just follow my lead okay?” Thatch murmurs soothingly, and you nod, curling your fingers around the hand you hold a little more tightly. Luckily the song playing at the moment is a little slower, so you don’t trip over your own feet as you try to relax and just go with the flow. Luckily the cook is patient, and you can feel him pressing you a little closer as you continue.

It only takes a couple of songs before he has you dancing just as fast as anyone else there, laughing softly sometimes as he adds a dramatic flourish. While sometimes another crew mate will spin you away for a jaunt, you always end up back in Thatch’s arms, hand linked firmly with his. 

By the time the music begins to wind down, you’re exhausted, yawning widely and about ready to head to bed. You look up at Thatch and you’re about to say goodnight when what almost looks like panic flashes across his face.

“Wait, don’t pull away… not yet.” He says, and you don’t, instead you almost melt against him. You lean in and rest your head against his shoulder, afraid something is wrong and wanting to wordlessly comfort him. Thatch makes a soft sound and just holds you, your linked hands down by your side. He’s well aware of a gaggle of division commanders watching expectantly and knows chatter will have spread all across the ship by morning. But you don’t seem to be aware, or at the least, if you are you don’t seem to care so Thatch tries to ignore the feeling as well.

“Are you okay?” You ask after a little while, pulling back just enough that you can look up at him. Your gaze makes Thatch’s breath catch in his throat, and his cheeks go slightly pink. He lifts your hand to his mouth and places a light kiss on it. 

“I’m fine.” He promises. “I just – I like the way your hand fits in mine.”

[namorslutfanfiction]

As time goes on the more disgusted I am becoming with Elena. She keeps getting caught in lies ON TOP OF providing no proof of these allegations still. She’s getting called out and exposed left and right and yet still keeps adding mkre lies on and deflecting. Do you think she will ever come clean or just keep lying. Or will she just stop talking about it all together and let it die down then keep playing victim when she’s called out on the bullshit? It’s like she got what she wanted, attention and a reaction, people looking at Tenoch on a bad light. It’s sick.

I think ultimately, Elena is getting what she aimed for, attention and a smear campaign against Tenoch. I don't think she will ever come clean unless there are legal repercussions.

It's been all but proven that she lied about the 'other women' telling her their negative experiences with Tenoch. She fabricated all of this to try and deflect from her past actions and use her victimhood as a vehicle for people to rally beside her.

It's honestly disgusting. From the more things that pop up from her past, I think it's safe to assume that she is a pathological liar with a violent streak. She is lighter skinned so she has that privilege as well as having connections to politics. Her family has also been revealed to have had major issues in the past.

Elena is grasping at straws now that people are actively refuting her claims and showing support to Tenoch. Some of these stories about how great Tenoch is seem almost too good to be true. But they usually come with pictures which help their validity.

Ultimately the damage has already been done. Tenoch has had to step out of a project, defend his personal actions, and been removed from promotional content for a new project. All we can do is continue to spread the positive stories of Tenoch and those people who have refuted Elena's claims. We can also continue to spread the evidence of Elena's fraudulence. I think she may try to wait it all out. but who knows.

She's already started preemptively blocking Tenoch stans who have never directly interacted with her, so she is taking time to see what the 'opposition' is doing. The recent move to focus on her acid case and ignore any mention of Tenoch definitely seems like deflection. But also if she really was telling the truth I don't think she would have worried about people mentioning him.

Sorry my brain is all over the place. This has turned so much messier than I expected.

[wetcatspellcaster]

Honest Lie - 6, 22, 25

6. What do you need to write? Is there anything special you need to do/have to help your creative flow?

Honestly, this is an interesting question for this fic specifically, bc my writing usually comes from a place of... pure fucking spite lmao. If there's something I don't like enough, I want to fix it (in Bleeding Heart, it was all the early access bullying lol). An Honest Lie is weird because I actually really like the Astarion canon storyline - though I can't speak for patches. So in this case, what I need to write, is a few weeks of getting depressed from my angsty as fuck AU, and then I come here to be cosy and promise my OC the world :')

22. Does personal experience ever inspire your fics? What about this particular fic?

Crying. killshot.

The fun thing about me, is that I don't consider any of my OCs self-inserts or related to me at all(this is no judgement to self-insert OCs, I simply do not consider myself hot enough to hold a candle to the imaginary women in my brain and thus, I admire anyone with the confidence).

...And then I go into therapy, and my therapist asks me about my writing, and then they give me a long hard look and I say "oh, no, I get that look, but it's not me, you see. because this girl is hot :) and pink :)". And then my therapist looks at me some more.

which is a bit of an overshare, but basically it turns out that every fic I write can be archaeologically surveyed about a year after I write it for the personal experience it actually entails (yes, I'm extremely worried about Pieces).

luckily, Rosalie is 2yrs old, so I have done that work already! and oh boy, does that make writing An Honest Lie fucking weird at times!

I've been pretty open that Rose was my pandemic OC. I didn't write her based on my own pandemic experiences - it was actually that two of my friends at the time were agoraphobic, I was anxious, and I liked the idea of a magical cure for both of those things, in the form of the tadpole. But since I wrote the first fic with her, I have realised a lot about myself: I have recovered from an acute self-hating depression, and I have received an autism diagnosis, all of which seem relevant to the Masker Extraordinaire.

If I was to pinpoint the exact piece of personal experience here, I think it's the irrational fear that all recovery can be undone in an instant. That is the worry that motivates a lot of Rosalie's character. Like Rose, I really fear the moment where my progress is exposed as a lie, or the risk that one thing will tip me back into my worst moment without me having any control over it. I don't think it will happen, but I do feel like that possibility haunts my choices and my everyday life!

25. Is there anything you would change about this fic? Why/Why not?

Weirdly... I'm not sure if I'd write it? which is a depressing way to answer this question. I like it as a project, but it's a little different than my approach to other fics - it feels messier as a story. I mostly started it bc people asked for a continuation of my first fic, and I have a lot of love for A Bleeding Heart... neither of these are good motivations for a whole new fic lmaooooo. But now that I'm here, I wouldn't change anything. I've accepted it's going to be a messier, more self-indulgent project, and that while it doesn't come from my usual urge to fix things in a story, which means I have less prompts going forward, instead I just have to fully enjoy the bits I love.

behind the scenes fic asks!

[horeformilfs]

I don't know how to be okay

Helena Bonham Carter X Fem!Reader

TW: Smoking, Fighting, SH, Eating Disorder, Talk about SA, Abuse

------------------------------------------

"But that's what you don't understand Helena, I don't know how to be okay," You scream as tears stream down your face. "Then let me help you, please," She says as she tires to come towards you. "No, I can't be helped, all I'm going to do is hurt you, I don't want that to happen," you say, as you walk to the front door and put on your coat.

She didn't move, she didn't try to stop you because she knew that you couldn't be stopped. When you were in this headspace the best thing to do was to give you some space to sort things out for yourself even though she didn't want to. You walked out the door and down the long driveway looking back to see Helena stranding in the doorway. 

It had been a few hours since you had left Helena's house and your phone had multiple missed calls and unread texts. You clothes now scattered on the floor of your bathroom as you stepped into the steaming shower, hoping the water would be hot enough to make you feel something.

After around 20 minutes of sitting on the tile floor of the shower you quickly washed your hair, wrapping yourself in a towel after turning off the water. 

Once in your sweats, you grab your cigarets, lighter, and book and make your way to your balcony. You take a seat on the couch and your cat Bella (yes you guessed right if you were thinking bellatrix) joins you on the other side of the sofa. You light your cigaret and inhale the toxic chemicals as you start reading your book. 

An hour passes, then two, then three, once you finish your book your have also managed to go through almost an entire pack of cigarets, with two left you decide to light them and put them out on your skin, burning yourself in the process.

You did not care that you were hurting yourself though because you didn't feel anything at this point. You body was littered with scars, burns, and bruises from your anger towards yourself and nobody had ever seen them, not even Helena.

You finally went inside twenty minutes later, the clock on the wall read 4:50 am, after finally checking your phone, you saw you had over twenty missed calls from your lover and thirty unread texts.

You looked at the messages from Helena but decided not to respond. You didn't know how to explain to her how hard it was for you to feel negative emotions and the toll it had on your mental and physical health. You finally went to bed around six o'clock in the morning and slept for almost a full twenty-four hours. 

Over the next week you did not look at your phone you figured that Helena was done with you. Somewhere deep inside your heart you knew that she wasn't like that, but from your past experiences, some part of you felt like it was true. During the week you didn't eat, overslept, and never once let yourself cry, even though you needed too. All you wanted was to be with Helena but you felt as if it was over. 

It was around midnight when you heard a knock on you apartment door. You didn't know who it was so went to the door and opened it. Standing on the other side of the door was Helena. She looked like a mess, her hair was messier than usual, eyes bloodshot and puffy, and she looked like she hadn't slept very much.

"Helena, what are you doing here," you asked surprised at the visit. "I needed to see you and make sure that you were okay," she responded moving to hug you, but you back away. She looked sad and confused at your motion and asked if she could come in and you agreed leading her through your living room to your balcony, taking a seat on the couch.

"So why are you here," you asked after she sat down. "Because I was worried about you and wanted to make sure that you were okay and safe, that's all I have ever wanted," she said looking at you with a sad look. "But why, I'm not worth anything and I know that you know that too, so please spare me the bullshit and tell me why you're really here," she just looked at you, heartbroken to hear that that is what you think of her and yourself.

"Darling, why on earth would you think that, I love you so much and I know that you know that," she replied moving to face you. "I just...never mind," you say turning away from her. "No Y/N, please don't shut me out again, I know that you have your troubles but I want to be there to help you through them, I want to be the one that you go to when you need to talk or to just be held, all I want is for you be alright and that may not be everyday and that may not happen for a while, but please, I'm begging you, let me support you, I can't see you hurt like this." She said.

All you could do was look at her, You didn't know how to respond, no one had ever wanted to stay with you once they had found out but you could see that she was telling the truth. 

After a few minutes of sitting in silence you finally spoke. "Alright, I will tell you, but I don't blame you if after you hear what I say you leave me," all she did was nod her head. "Well if I'm starting from the beginning, I was born in another country and was adopted, my parents used to hit me when I was little, but they deny every doing it, so that's part of the reason why I don't really like being touched or why I flinch when you try to hug me, but I'm like that with everyone, so don't think that it's you. Then I was sexually assaulted twice, I tried telling the school about it when I was 14 but the didn't believe me. The second time it happened I told my parents and my mom asked me what I was wearing and if I had given his any sign to show that I wanted it, which obviously isn't true. 

I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety later that year and after that I was in and out of hospitals. Then, earlier this year after being in a program I was finally diagnosed with social anxiety, PTSD, and BPD," you say finally looking at Helena, who had tears streaming down her face. "Darling, why didn't you every tell me this," she asked wondering why you felt as if she couldn't be trusted.

"I don't know, it's just, anytime I told someone, they would leave me, think that I was too much to deal with or would want friends that didn't have any mental health problems, so after a while I just decided to keep it to myself and not tell people that I got close to, in fear of them leaving."

"Well you don't have to worry about me leaving, because I'm here by your side the whole way, I don't care how much you try to push me away, I'm not letting go of you, you are so special to me and I hope you know that," she said as she pulled you into her lap. You flinched at first, but quickly relaxed, wrapping your arms around her waist and placing your head on her chest. 

"I would like to more about how your diagnoses effect you, if you're willing to share that with me," Helena asked breaking the silence. You gently nod your head, taking a deep breath, while mentally preparing yourself for the conversation. 'When it comes to BPD, I have a hard time expressing my emotions in a controlled safe way and tend to feel emotions very strongly, which can lead to negative coping skills like, self harm. I tend to cut or burn myself when I fell strong negative emotions because I feel as though it is my fault that those emotions are even present in my life."

"I also engage in a lot of black and white thinking, which basically is a thought pattern that makes people think in absolutes. For instance, you may think you are either always right or the world's biggest failure. People with Borderline Personality Disorder also tend to have unclear or shifting self-image, unstable interpersonal relationships, mood swings, impulsive and self-destructive behavior like I mentioned before, a fear of rejection or abandonment, self-harm and suicidal tendencies, like the cutting, explosive rage which for me can mean punching or breaking doors or walls, feelings of emptiness, and a loss of touch with reality, which for me is dissociation which is a way the mind copes with too much stress, or in my case a traumatic event," you explain as Helena listens closely, encouraging you to go on. 

"When something traumatic happens, our body tends to have a fight, flight, freeze, or fawn reactions. The fight response is your body's way of facing any perceived threat aggressively, flight means your body urges you to run from danger, and freeze is your body's inability to move or act against a threat. Fawn is your body's stress response to try to please someone to avoid conflict." You tell her.

"In my case, my initial instinct was to freeze, it is sometimes described as a 'mental escape' when physical escape is not possible, or when a person is so emotionally overwhelmed that they cannot cope any longer. I couldn't get away from the person who was hurting me to my brain switched off in a sense, I felt as if I was disconnected from my body or as if I was just observing what was happening. I think that hardest part of all of this is realizing that none of it is my fault, and when I realize that it is true I will be better equipped to cope with the feeling from the trauma." 

Once you had finished talking you sat in silence as you looked at Helena, you couldn't tell what was going through her head. "I hope you know that I'm never going to leave you Y/N, you are so brave for telling me and I hope you know that you were amazing to trust me. Mental disorders are difficult things to process especially when they are just thrown at you and no one has explained what any of it means to you." She says

"I have to say that I am beyond proud of you for being able to talk to me about his and I hope that you know that I will always be here for you, now that I know about this, we can work together on a way for you to let me know when you are feeling worse so that I can be there to support you when you need it. I know that you may feel like I'm going to leave you because everyone else did, but I promise with all of my heart that that is never going to happen, I love you so much and all I want is for you to be happy, healthy, and safe." You knew that she was telling the truth and that made you feel safe. You stayed in each others embrace until Helena spoke up. 

"Little one, I know that you had mentioned some self- destructive behavior before and I want to make sure that all of those, whether they are burns or cuts are clean and take care of. Do you mind if I take a look at them," she asks in almost a delicate way, as if not to frighten you.

You silently agree getting up and leading her from the balcony of your apartment to the bathroom. You sit of the counter as she grabs the large first aid kit under the sink. She can see that you are growing more and more visibly anxious at the thought of her seeing your body but reassures you that there is nothing to worry about and leads you through an exercise to control your breathing.

"Everything is going to be alright little love, I want you to focus on keeping your breathing normal alight, do you think you can do that for me," she asks as she takes some of the needed materials out of the kit. You nod your head, letting her know that you agree with what she had said.

"Alright now love, I'm going to have to take off your sweatshirt in order to see your arms, are you okay with that," you nod your head, but she did not want that response. "Darling I need you to answer me with words." "Yes, I am alright with that," you reply as you continue to focus on your breathing. 

Helena makes quick work of washing the various wounds on your arms, never once making you think that she was at all mad at you. Once they were clean she let you hop in the shower to wash up since you had neglected to do so for a few days, while you were showering she picked up your room and the kitchen, and grabbed you a fresh set of clothes and one of her sweaters that had her perfume on it.

You hurried to get dressed not wanting to keep Helena waiting any longer. After finishing in the bathroom you made your way to your room where popcorn, your favorite candy and The Corpse Bride were ready for you to enjoy. You knew that Helena did not like to see herself in movies but when it came to animated ones she let it slide.

You quickly made your way to her, wrapping your arms around her, engulfing her in a hug, words could not describe how you felt at that moment, that fact that she took the time to do that for you was amazing and you loved every part of it.