#Side Stone Diamond Engagement Rings | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thelostconsultant · 6 months ago

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Double surprise

pairing: Lando Norris x reader

summary: Lando wants to surprise you, but in the end you surprise him too.

Lando could tell Max was already planning to bang his head against the coffee table, but it honestly wasn't his fault. Maybe he was terrible at making decisions at the moment, yes, so what? It's not like he had anywhere to rush at this time, and if he was a true friend, he would stay to provide emotional support.

Because Lando was preparing for something big, and the first step was asking a jewelry store employee to jump in the hotel he was staying in with a bunch of engagement rings. If he showed up in the store himself, social media would be full of pictures within a matter of minutes. He didn't want to ruin the surprise. And it was also much more comfortable this way.

“Lando, just pick the third one. You said it yourself, that's her style,” Max tried.

With a thoughtful hum, the Brit picked up the said piece and took a better look at it. “Yeah, it's true, but,” he began, then came to a halt as he grabbed the last one the jeweler showed him. “I don’t know, the first one is a classic, but what if she prefers something modern and trendy?”

The jeweler watched him in silence, the patience of a saint radiating from his smile. He had been there for two hours now, it was already nine in the evening, but he not once made a comment about still being there. “Which one is closer to what she usually wears?” he asked softly, trying to guide him towards a decision.

Lando thought for a moment. “The classic one,” he replied while he took a closer look at it again.

One big, round white diamond with two smaller stones on its side, completed by a yellow gold band. It was clean. Nice. Something simply elegant for her. But then he glanced over at the other one and saw the curved white gold band with a big, pear shaped yellow diamond, and a voice in his head told him that was the one. People would go insane over it when you shared it on social media.

He looked up at the jeweler with a thankful smile, then turned to Max. “All right, I'm buying both. She'll get the trendy one, but if she doesn't like it, all I'll have to do is pull out the classic option. She can even wear whichever she prefers depending on the day,” he explained his master plan.

Max let out a sigh of relief and mouthed ‘finally’ under his breath, while the jeweler clapped his hands together and closed the box with the rest of the rings. Meanwhile Lando had a huge grin on his face, clearly satisfied with his decision. He solved the problem. Sure, it took two hours, but he wanted to pick the perfect ring for you.

Since he specifically asked for rings already available in your size–which he only knew because he stole one you wore on that finger–he kept the chosen ones and said goodbye to the jeweler after paying for the items. Once they were left alone, Max picked up the rings and took a closer look at them, carefully examining every centimeter, every curve, and every stone. As if he was waiting for approval, Lando raised an eyebrow at him.

“Good choice if you ask me. Seeing her disappointed in your taste wouldn't make you feel good, even if she said yes,” Max said with a short laugh before putting down the jewels.

Rolling his eyes, Lando stretched his arms above his head and fought back a yawn. Media day always took a lot out of him and today wasn't any different. Add the stress of making the right decision and he felt like a truck had hit him. “Thanks, mate,” he told his friend.

“When will you ask her?”

“She arrives tomorrow, so I guess I'll get it over with as soon as I can. I need an extra boost for qualifying,” he added with a laugh.

Max gave him a ‘good luck out-qualifying me’ look, but Lando was too hyped to notice. So he let out a sigh and decided to voice his only concern. “So you want to get this over with? Sounds romantic.”

“You know what I mean,” Lando said defensively, giving him a disappointed look that was mixed with the hurt feeling because he dared to joke about him not being serious enough about it.

“Well, tell me how it went.” Max patted his friend on the shoulder before standing up, then watched him with a small smile. “But I'm proud of you. She's nice and has a good influence on you… You chose wisely.”

“Thanks. See you tomorrow at the track?”

Max nodded, then he raised his hand to wave him goodbye and left the hotel room. This left Lando alone with his thoughts, and he began to wonder if he would succeed. The two of you had been going through a bit of a rough patch lately, and he told you this trip was all about fixing that. You would join him for the race weekend, then you would stay in the area for a little trip, just the two of you, away from curious eyes.

His mother told him this plan of his might backfire, because you weren't entirely pleased with him right now, and who knew, maybe you would consider this a way to force you to stay in this relationship. He obviously didn't want you to feel that way, but he didn't want you to leave him either.

His phone buzzed next to him, and when he took a look at it, a wide smile grew on his face. “Hello, beautiful,” he answered happily.

“Hey, you have a moment?” you asked him hesitantly.

“For you? Always.”

There was a short pause, he could hear the traffic in the background, but before he could ask you where you were, you took a deep breath and began to talk. “So I said I'm gonna arrive tomorrow, but I won't.”

Lando felt like he was stabbed in the heart, like the air had been knocked out of his lungs. “What do you mean you won't? You promised to come here, you can't just back out of it! Unless it's a family emergency. Is it a family emergency?” he asked, barely able to hide the anger that latched onto his voice.

You remained silent for a while and he silently cursed under his breath. How could you do this to him? You had agreed you would join him two months ago, there's no way you couldn't plan that much ahead back then. But then you let out a laugh, one of those adorable laughs he loved so much, and his anger disappeared at once.

“I'll send you an address. Get in the car and meet me there,” you told him.

“I'll be at the track all day and you arrive in the morning, don't tell me you won't–”

You cleared your throat to interrupt him. “I was talking about now, you muppet. Or are you about to sleep?” you asked him teasingly.

Lando huffed and rolled his eyes. But then it struck him, you were talking about now, you were talking about him driving to that mysterious location, which meant… “Wait, you're already here?” he asked you.

“Just meet me. There's something I need to tell you.”

And with that you ended the call. He didn't have the brain capacity to stop you, and it didn't occur to him that he could have called you back. Instead he stood there, staring at the screen of his phone until the notification popped up. He put the address in the search bar and checked the map. It was close, only a fifteen minutes drive from his hotel.

Without hesitation, he grabbed his keys and headed to where you were apparently waiting for him. He was already standing in front of the elevator when he realized he left the rings in his room, and he didn't want to leave without them. So he ran back and picked up the two boxes, putting them safely in his pocket.

After a car ride that seemed painfully slow, he finally arrived at his destination. According to your message, you were right here, but when he looked up, he noticed it was a private clinic. Hoping this was the right address, he went closer to the door and it opened right away, so he went inside and tried to figure out where to go next. This place was huge, and at this time it felt like he was in The Walking Dead.

“Mr. Norris? Please, follow me,” a woman in her thirties told him with a polite smile, gesturing towards the elevator.

“Where are we going?” he asked when the door closed behind them.

The woman only watched him with a mysterious smile, probably perfectly aware of what was happening, but she didn't say a word. She probably promised to keep your secret, which was nice, but also extremely annoying. Why in a clinic? Did something happen to you? But you sounded happy, surely everything was okay.

Before they stopped, the woman handed him an eye mask and asked him to put it on. At this point he didn't dare to ask questions, so he did as he was told and followed her guidance after the elevator came to a halt. After she made him stop, he heard a door open and he was soon pushed ahead to enter.

He waited. Someone would hopefully come over to tell him what this was all about, and until then he decided to remain silent. And then he felt soft fingers trace his cheek, only to find the edge of the mask and slowly pull it off his head. There you were, happy and in one piece. With a smile, he was quick to pull you into a hug.

“I missed you,” he whispered as he kissed your head then buried his face into the crook of your neck. “What are you doing here? Or rather, what are we doing here in a clinic?”

“I have a surprise for you,” you purred into his ear, and he could feel your nails scratch the skin on the back of his neck as you spoke. It felt nice. He missed this.

For the first time, he took a look around the ultrasound room, and when he noticed the posters on the walls, his suspicion began to grow. “Wait a second,” he began as he took a step back and looked you in the eye. “Are you…?” He pointed at your abdomen with a raised eyebrow.

With a laugh, you took his hand. “I am. Eight weeks in,” you informed him.

For a while he was staring at you with a dumbfounded look on his face, but then he stepped closer to pull you into a passionate kiss. What started out as something serious soon turned into a series of giggles from the both of you. Lando was the one who pulled away, suddenly remembering something.

He excused himself and stepped outside for long enough to find the main ring’s box in his pocket, then returned with his hands held behind his back. There was no plan, at least not for these circumstances, so he had no choice but to improvise. You looked confused and he had to flash a smile at you to let you know it was okay.

“I… You know… Damn it. Okay, so there was a plan, I promise, but you didn't really leave me a choice. Pick a hand.”

“What?” you asked with a confused look.

“Choose a hand. Left or right?”

You let out a thoughtful hum, visibly thinking about the answer. Then you flashed a wide grin at him and said, “Right.”

It was in his left hand, but nevermind, he grabbed the box with his right one and held it out for you. “This is yours,” he said nervously.

The shocked look on your face made him worry, but it slowly melted away as you slowly opened the box and saw the ring inside. You took it out to take a better look at the piece of jewelry, and soon a smile grew on your face before you finally turned to him.

“What do you say?” Lando asked.

“You didn't ask me anything.”

With a roll of his eyes, he reached out to take the ring and took your hand as well. “Will you marry me?” You nodded without hesitation, tears already forming in your eyes, and he quickly put the ring on your finger before you could change your mind. He kissed you again, but he could tell you were looking at your new ring behind his back. “You like it?” he asked once he pulled away and took a look at it as well.

You nodded. “It's beautiful.”

Lando reached into his pocket for the other box, and showed you his plan B. “If you'd prefer something classic, here's this one too,” he explained.

“You're insane. One ring is more than enough,” you told him with a laugh.

“Well, I know how many shoes you have, this can't be any different.”

With a playful laugh, you slapped his arm. “An engagement ring is different, trust me,” you said as you leaned closer. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He looked around and motioned towards the machine in the corner. “So… Are we here so I can take a look at my child?”

You nodded and went out to ask the doctor to come in. Meanwhile Lando couldn't help but think about how much organizing it must have taken to get this ready, but he was honestly grateful, because it was a big surprise. A big and amazing surprise. This was one of the reasons why he loved you so much, and all he wanted was to make your life as good as he could in return.

#lando norris x you #lando norris x reader #lando norris #f1 x you #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1

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elysianightsss · 9 days ago

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WHERE THE LONELY ONES ROAM | PART ONE

“Can I have a glass of water?” You chirp from the hospital bed, pillows all fluffed and propped up for your comfort. He nodded grabbing the empty plastic cup from the bedside table and leaving the room.

John he said his name was, you were so confused as to why you should care after waking up and being told by the nurses you had been in a serious car accident. Your husband, he had claimed he was and though you were exhausted, you had been ready to argue that was impossible but he flashed his wedding ring that was silver just like the rings around your finger.

The diamond engagement ring and wedding ring fit perfectly, he pulled them off and on the inside rim was your initials and his engraved with a date, your wedding day he told you. You suppose that was enough for you, besides he seemed so sweet and caring. So comforting and husbandly, why would you try to argue against his words.

He stayed by your side as the doctor came to tell you that you’re suffering with amnesia and it was unlikely your memories would return. John relaxed at this, which you didn’t quite understand but maybe he was just relieved that nothing was broken. Just a cut on the side of your head and memory loss.

After being discharged with like a billion different pill bottles, he took you ‘home’, a large, cabin like house miles away from civilisation. A regular sized garden and lots of trees surrounding the area, the only way to leave the place safely seemed to be by car. Not that that should be something you need to worry about, your husband should protect you.

He carried you inside and placed you on the softest sofa. The living room looked lovely, pictures of the two of you in pretty patterned frames you’re sure you must have chosen given they’re suited to your taste. Though you notice a couple look a little distorted from close up, maybe it was the way the photo was taken or the lense? Or maybe it’s just old, you tell yourself.

John is in the kitchen, you can see him through the alcove that leads into the mid century modern kitchen. It’s designed once again to your taste, you hope your husband hasn’t just catered to you in this big house and he’s sprinkled somewhere in the architecture too.

He’s sorting the pills you were given by the hospital, reading the bottles intensely before moving onto the instructions and schedules for each one. You feel as if you’re not allowed to move from the position he’d plonked you in though he never specifically said those words to you. It’s a feeling deep in your gut that if you stand without asking for his help, he’ll be angry with you.

So you ask, he turns to you and grins? “You don’t need to ask to move around your own house, love. Unless you need help,” he says coming around the kitchen island and through the alcove into the living room, stopping right in front of you. He hovers over you, blues gazing into your eyes “then ask as much as you’d like.”

You nod slightly feeling a little like prey under this clear predator's stare. “Will you show me where the bathroom is?” You don’t remember where it is no matter how hard you try. John holds his hand out to you and though you hesitate, you take it. He leads you up the stairs and to the second door on the right, opening the door you find yet again an unfamiliar room but you thank him nonetheless.

He stays standing there even when you walk inside and close the door you don’t hear any receding footsteps. Shrugging you head over to the toilet to pee, as you sit you take a moment to look around the room. It’s only a small bathroom, a walk-in shower to the left or the toilet and a bunch of counters with a built-in sink to the right of you.

There are little things about yourself that you know, that are set in stone even without your memories and knowing you’d never like a house without a bath in it is one of those things. You loved a bath after a rough day at work…

Work. You stand quickly, finishing your business and washing your hands. You basically burst out of the sliding barn like door. John looks at you surprised though he remains quiet, is patient as you struggle to find your words.

“Work?” Is all you manage but he seems to understand, his pupils dilating unnaturally to where you feel a shiver run down your spine.

“You quit your job two years ago honey.” John says almost robotic, it seems rehearsed and cold. But you accept it. He starts to walk away when you have another thought.

“What about my family? I must have some right?” You try to grab onto any thin veil of hope that you have someone else out there other than a man you don’t remember.

John turns back to you, once again seeming robot like, “You have a brother who lives far away, I’ve notified him of what happened, but love, there’s no guarantee he can make it here because of work.”

“No parents?” You question confused, it makes John sigh with a shake of his head and a quiet ‘no’.

According to your husband you were an orphan, but that didn’t expunge the feeling of love and affection you seem to know you had growing up. A kind of love you don’t receive from a sibling.

He simply shakes his head once more. John holds his hand out to you and though you hesitate, you take it. He leads you into a bedroom, “This is our room.” He tells you letting go of your hand and watching you take it all in. This room is not catered to your taste but it looks like he’s tried to change that.

The dark blue paint has a few painting hung here and there, a dark oak wardrobe and matching queen sized bed. What peaks your interest the most though is the big glass window. John shows you how it opens up onto a balcony, you can see forest upon forest up here. There really was no other way to leave here safety.

“What’s my brother’s name?” You ask turning to John who smiles a little at your question, seems to be the only one that hasn’t irked him so far.

“Simon.” He replies softly, “Come on let’s go back in, it’s freezing this time of year. Should even have some snow over the next few weeks.” He tells you wrapping an arm around your shoulder to guide you inside.

John cooks dinner for you both and while you sit in the cozy dining room eating, all you can think about is Simon. Your brother who you don’t remember. You can’t wait to meet him, you refrain from saying this to John. He seemed annoyed when you originally asked about family. Maybe he and Simon don’t get along? You’ll have to find out from your brother, you suppose.

You offer to do the dishes but John stands firm on no. He does them quickly and efficiently, placing them away in the correct cupboards while you watch on silently. John doesn’t ask you if you’re comfortable sharing a bed with him, after all he is technically a stranger to you. It’s the only thing that has truly bothered you since you have woken up.

He simply gets into bed next to you, kissing your hairline and asks you if you need anything before he goes to sleep. You say no and hear the ruffle of the sheets, feel the movement of him turning over and soon you hear snores. It’s only at this point you notice your shoulders have been tense this entire time, only when knowing he’s unconscious do you relax enough to fall asleep.

The peace doesn’t last long, nightmares plague your mind. A man with you, you’re happy. A fight. Running. Driving. Then a car crash. Glass and metal flying everywhere. You’re upside down but still strapped into your seat. Warm blood dripping up your head. Footsteps. A light being shone in your eyes. The hospital. Beeping. Shouting in the distance. A big bang.

Then your eyes are shooting open with a scream slipping from your lips, vision blurry, you’re hyperventilating. Blue eyes come into view as arms wrap around your body. “Alright sweetheart, you’re okay. You’re safe. It’s okay I’ve got you.” The man comforts you and you have to ask panicked what his name is.

“It’s John, it’s me honey. It’s John.” He repeats it twice, nothing but patience in his voice.

“John.” You say loudly in between breaths.

The tendrils of panic wrap around your limbs, tightening at the same time John starts to rock you in his hold. He whispers calming words in your ear but they do nothing for the state you’re in.

“What the fuck.” You shudder, feeling like the ground is shaking beneath you. It’s like a dark cloud falls over your eyes as a ringing begins in your ears. Walls colliding in your head, you’re scrambling to understand, pulling open every file that’s been shut away in the far corners of your mind for this man, for this house, for this life.

For you.

It’s too much with too little information, you can’t do it. You don’t understand. Your brain trying too hard until everything goes black. Once again you hear the beeping of a machine, the fuses of a doctor M something. You hear a concerned voice you don’t recognise….

“Sweetheart?”

You startle because you don’t know who that is calling you a sweet little pet name, you flinch because you’re not in the hospital like you were two seconds ago. You feel a scream build and bubble in your throat because how the fuck did you get in the kitchen with a ruggedly handsome man stood in front of you looking at you expectantly as if you had the answer to the question he was asking.

Staring into his hypnotising blue eyes you couldn’t help but think, did it really matter? Your conscience needed to shut it because of course it mattered. He was a stranger no matter how good looking.

“Honey is everything okay?” You blink at him too in shock to form words.

The man moved towards you and as much as you want to flinch away, to run, you’re rooted to your spot. He’s so close you’re breathing the same air, he lifts his large, silver wedding ring wrapped around his fourth finger, hand and presses it to your forehead bringing his other hand to press it to your cheek.

“You don’t look so good love.” He’s probably right, “you’re burning up.” You did feel like you could throw up, “let’s get you to bed, shouldn’t have been trying to do the dishes anyway. C’mon now easy does it.” He breathes and picks you up, your eyes glance over his shoulder as he opens the fridge grabbing a cold bottle of water.

You look over his shoulder to an open recipe book on the kitchen counter. It’s not yours. It’s your handwriting on the pages but not yours. You don’t own a recipe book and never have, you liked to wing it. Yet you can see when you’ve noted ‘needs more cinnamon’ on one of the pages. The curves and winds of the letters, it’s your handwriting.

You get carried up the stairs and into a bedroom, placed carefully on a big bed that felt like a cloud. “I’m gonna grab a cold flannel for your head, be right back sweetheart.” He leaves and despite the wooziness that begins to seep into you, you manage to look around.

The room looks well organised, a bathroom just opposite the bed where he went, soft bed sheets, photos everywhere, one that catches your attention the most is a photo by the side of the bed with a picture of you and the man that’s in the bathroom both smiling and looking happy. The blue photo frame says ‘My John’ at the bottom in big white block letters.

“John.” You mutter just as you read it.

“Yeah love?” The man that carried you upstairs comes back with a flannel in his hand. He looks at you expectantly just like he had downstairs.

“I-I’m tired?” You choke out sheepishly.

“Are you asking me or telling me?” He grins cheekily before coming over to you and pressing the flannel against your burning head, “You had another episode honey. Asking or telling, I think it’s best you sleep.”

“Episode?” You don’t understand. Twinges of panic start to explode into something more, you feel like you need air and you can’t get it. Your hands ball into fists, squeezing around nothing. Your shoulders are ridged the way your brain is, it feels like it’s not longer working, that you’ve short circuited. It’s not right. Something is not right.

You’re pulled out of your frenzy by a bark, it’s makes you freeze eyes flitting to the perpetrator. A dog. But you don’t own a dog. “Easy Bear mums okay.” John soothes him, but the dog Bear, tilts his head as he sits in the doorway to the bedroom with a frown. A gurgled grumble comes out from him as he stares at you.

You turn slightly to look at John who’s already looking at you, his ocean eyes swirl with emotion. You recognise them, you remember them. They must be safe, he must be safe. Out of everything that doesn’t sit right, that doesn’t seem right, that’s out of place, he seems right. He’s what you remember. He must be safe.

“Okay sweetheart, you know I don’t like it but it’s probably best for you to take the medication Dr MacTavish prescribed you.” You watch almost as if it’s in slow motion as he grabs a small white cardboard box with blue and yellow stripes on it. He opens it and pulls out the familiar plastic tray with foil covering the top. He pops one of the bumps and pulls out a light blue pill that looks tiny in the palm of his hand.

“I don’t condone this.” He mutters to himself but it’s loud enough that you hear it though you don’t say anything. “But maybe it is what’s best for right now like he said and who am I to argue with a Doctor.” He scoffs but smiles at you from where he’s sat next to you on the edge of the bed.

If he couldn’t argue with a Doctor, then you couldn’t either you suppose. You look into his eyes again. You remember them, you should trust what you remember. Nodding a little you take the pill and pop it in your mouth. It’s bitter and the chalky residue it leaves on your tongue makes your face scrunch up with disgust. John passes you a bottle of water and you move quickly opening the lid and chugging some of it.

“Good girl. I know that wasn’t nice but you did good honey. You need to lay down now, Doctor MacTavish said you’ll feel dizzy and most likely sleep straight away.” He explains, his voice soft despite the perpetual gravely undertone to it.

“Okay.” You snuggle down into bed, gripping the soft covers almost oblivious to the fact you’d just taken a drug offered to you with no explanation. A dizziness sweeps over you like alcohol suddenly hitting you all at once and then you’re out like a light. John’s smile disappears from his face the moment he knows you’re asleep. He chucks the pills haphazardly onto the bedside table before getting up.

“Watch her.” He commanded as he walked past Bear, the dog staying in place as John walks out of the room and down the stairs starting on the dishes you’d been arguing about minutes ago.

As he scrubs it feels like meditation to him, scrubbing and scrubbing the dishes clean. He wants to do this to your mind, wants to scrub all your memories clean and start over but he knows getting Johnny to perform a lobotomy on you like he suggested would only hurt him to see you in pain. Not worth it.

He can make this work, he planned it down to the last minute detail. And so far it’s working perfectly. No lobotomy needed. Hopefully it should never have to go that far.

John finishes the dishes, does the laundry, ignores the text from Simon asking when to come over, hoovers the living room and puts dinner in the slow cooker before going to check on you. Bear hasn’t moved from his spot, something John praises him for with a pat to the head. You’d turned in your drug induced sleep, the duvet pulled up under your chin while you lay on your side looking more peaceful than you had all week.

He stares down at you. It feel wrong when it’s like this, when you’re not awake and distracting him. When he can hear the all the thoughts swirling, he can hear the voices, the screams, the gunshots… it’s all too much.

You quiet the noise.

“I hope one day you understand…” he sniffs, eyes stinging, wiping a tear from his cheek, “and I pray you forgive me.”

To be continued…

Taglist | @ry-kage @silverxxs-world @cringeycookies @skyfire93 @piconico17 @evans-dejong

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clawsdevour · 4 months ago

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hq charas proposal + rings hcs

wc: 0.6k content warning: all fluff!!, reader x all hq charas, not proofread

.⠀✶;..

-the type to believe in 'the bigger the diamond, the bigger the heart' as in their love for you. the really don't care about how it the ring may be perceived by others because they won't know how much they love you enough to find you the biggest diamond in store.

"okay.. um. OH MY GOD! i think i just saw a squirrel," while they point somewhere behind you, struggling to get onto one knee before you whip your head around to see the love of your life with one knee on the floor. "i lied there was no squirrel.. but i never lie about how much i love you, will you marry me?"

charas: hinata shoyo, bokuto koutaro, tanaka ryunosuke, nishinoya yu

─

-the type to get you a diamond-encrusted ring.. hear me out okay. not the ugly tacky ones but a simple one where it's just tiny diamonds all over where you can wear it with every outfit. even though it's already encrusted with multiple diamonds.. they believe you're more than just that amount on the ring they proposed with.

"This ring may not seem like much when it comes to diamonds. But it somewhat expresses at least a quarter of my love for you. I promise to continue making you the happiest you'll ever be whenever we're together and add to the diamonds on your finger along the way. What do you say? Will you marry me?"

charas: osamu miya, daichi sawamura, oikawa tooru, atsumu miya

─

-the type to propose to you with an elegant but extravagant ring that has three stone diamonds in the middle. they think that two more on the sides of the middle are better than just one and that it just matches how they saw you more. either way.. the way they perceive you doesn't change but the love and adoration they have for you which increases daily.

"love, ever since i met you that day. all i could see was you looking down at me from above as i slid a ring on your finger. all i could think about was how i wanted to be the best man you could ever have.. please, will you marry me?"

charas: kuroo tetsurou, yaku morisuke, sugawara koshi, iwaizumi hajime

─

-the type to find a sleek and elegant ring to do more than one with a diamond. something about the easy-going and smooth design drew them in, similar to your promise rings when you first starting dated had nostalgia washing over them while they went shopping for your engagement rings.

"this might not look like much... well, that's because i wanted them to look like the rings we had when we first started dating. the promise rings were already like wedding rings. the spark of joy i felt when you wanted to match something so symbolic in a relationship had ideas of being bonded together for life running courses in my head. so why don't we get them permanently and.. get married?"

charas: kita shinsuke, kageyama tobio, tsukishima kei, akaashi keiji

─

-the type to purchase a simple regular diamond ring.. however, a very valuable one that made their bank account gulp. either way, they still swiped that card because they know that the amount they're spending isn't even enough to match the amount of love they have in store for you.. or even your wedding night. everytime you'd question them how much they spent on your ring, they're definitely brushing it off.. never letting you know.....

"wow.. i don't even know what to say but marry me, please. since day one i couldn't take you off my mind. all i could ever think about was having a future with you in it, right next to me. please.. will you do the honors of marrying me?"

charas: sakusa kiyoomi, kenma kozume, suna rintarou, ushijima wakatoshi

masterlist here

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missradiantjewels · 11 months ago

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diamondsluvore · 1 year ago

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Discover a world of timeless sophistication with our exquisite collection of side stone engagement rings. Each piece is meticulously crafted to accentuate the center stone, adding a touch of brilliance and allure to symbolize your love.

#Side stone engagement rings #Side stone diamond rings #channel set engagement rings #platinum diamond rings #engagement rings for women

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decorisdiamonds · 1 year ago

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Side stone engagement rings are not just stunning pieces of jewellery; they are reflections of a couple's unique journey and their commitment to a shared future. Whether adorned with classic diamonds, vibrant sapphires, or lush emeralds, these rings encapsulate the beauty of love's multifaceted nature.

#side stone engagement rings #side stone diamond rings #emerald side stone engagement rings

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kadwrites · 1 year ago

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desperate measures | T.S

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summary ; you finally take on the role of the tommy's bride-to-be.

warnings ; arranged marriage trope, typos? , idk, slow burn.

a/n ; let me know what you guys think! , also , i wanted to ask if you guys would want smut in this series? idk lmk

goosebumps prickle your skin all over, your eyes are glassy when you look down. thomas shelby is down on his knee, kissing your hand.

"tommy..." your voice is softer than you thought it would be

"ya need to be proposed to right? to be engaged?" he pulls away , his thumb slightly caressing your knuckles

neither of you have moved, you just look at each other.

you chuckle again, your eyes go to the diamond ring that rests on your finger "tommy, it's perfect."

"i wanted it to be perfect."

your heart feels like it's going to explode, maybe celest was right, maybe he isn't all that bad.

he stands up, your hand still in his "now we're engaged" he's still giving you that soft smile.

"we are." you can't help the smile that's on your lips

after he left, you hear the sounds of your friends stampeding down the stairs, as if they knew something has happened. anna helps renne down the stairs.

"let's see it" renee has a hand behind her, supporting her back and a hand on her belly, looking at you with genuine joy and excitement.

you move your hands, showing the big diamond ring, the ring shines and as soon as everyone sees it, they all gasp.

"he went down on one knee..." you whisper as you look at it, recalling what had happened, still smiling. you couldn't stop smiling, even if you tried

fiona is screaming and squealing , madeline is grabbing your hand and looking at the stone

"oh my god"

"he did what?" fiona says , her voice loud as she stares at you excitedly

anna giggles, looking at renee "who would've thought thomas shelby had it in 'im aye?"

abraham is also there , standing next to anna "that's a big fucking rock" he mutters.

"i know" you couldn't believe it either,

"oh my god, it's gorgeous" celest whispers as she stares at the ring, a hand over her mouth "let me see, let me see"

you push your hand in front of her and she takes it in hers eagerly "good lord, this must've cost 'im a fortune"

"god i'm still shaking" you laugh, your hand is unsteady "i almost dropped face first into the fucking floor." you can almost still feel his lips on your skin.

the butterflies in your stomach were still there whenever you'd remember that moment, even days after.

oliver had dropped you by tommy's office, you both needed to go over some things for the party, and you needed to go see a seamstress that'll be making your engagement dress, tommy is coming along to pay.

you walk through the halls that are now familiar to you, heading for his office.

"congratulations" the blonde woman spoke with a smile,

you stop walking, is she talking to you?. you turn and look at her "um thank you."

"i bet it took a lot of convincing aye? to finally give ya some sort of ring, some sort of.... acknowledgment" her voice is so sweet you almost wouldn't catch the malice in it "how sweet of 'im, he was willing to do something like that"

"excuse me?"

"i suppose he felt like he was lookin' for a woman who was not as ... demanding perhaps ?" her head tilts to the side "desperate times call for desperate measures"

you compose yourself, somehow you kept your anger out of your voice "ya don't know what you're talkin' about , miss carter. if i was you, i'd keep my mouth"

"oh please." she rolls her eyes, a mocking laugh is accompanied with it as she leans back in her chair "mr shelby is a good man, with a good heart, he probably did it out of pity." she coos "ya two hardly look like a couple."

"ya mind repeating those words to me, miss carter?"

tommy moved so quietly , you didn't even know he was standing beside you until he spoke.

"mr shelby..." she tries to smile, she stutters

he was watching, he always somehow is. he watched you walk, watched how you responded to her, how you held yourself.

"start talkin'." his voice was cold, it was ice cold.

her eyes widen, she licks her lips nervously "sir"

"she said that we don't look like a couple, that you're marrying me out of pity" the words that polly spoke to you, that first time you ever came here were ringing in your ear.

"is that so?" he didn't take his eyes off of her "is that so , miss carter?" he repeats.

she doesn't respond , she's just looking at him as if she wanted the earth to part and swallow her whole.

"and i'm sure that it doesn't look like i fucked 'er till her back gave out last night but looks can be deceiving, aye?"

with the way he spoke, even you almost believed him.

you held back a laugh, you tilt your head , mimicking how she spoke to you not even two minutes ago, with a small smirk on your lips. was it petty that you enjoyed this? probably, but you didn't really care.

his words did have an affect on you, but you pushed those thoughts to the back of your mind.

her eyes dart between you and him, she tries to speak but he stops her

"i will go out with my fiancée, and when i come back i better not find one fucking trace of ya in this place."

your eyes snap to him, watching him now.

"i'm not the good man ya think i am, not to the likes of ya. the only reason i'm being forgiving today , is because my bride is next to me. next time , i wouldn't be so charitable."

he turns, his hand rests on the small of your back, taking you with him. you give the woman one last glance before you go.

she looked as if her blood stopped flowing, as if it froze in her veins ,her eyes still stuck on where tommy was.

taglist; @tardisloverz , @optimisticsandwichgladiator , @theshelbyslimited , @illuminwtesz , @goldensunflowe-r , @gruffle1 , @warrior-of-justice , @mgdixon , @babayaga67 , @goblinjnr, @justaproudslytherpuff , @budugu , @twlegit , @amberpanda99 , @aesthetic0cherryblossom , @capswife , @lets-turn-and-burn , @affabletimelady

#kadwrites #tommy shelby x reader #thomas shelby x reader #thomas shelby imagine #tommy shelby imagine #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders fanfiction #thomas shelby fanfiction #tommy shelby fanfiction

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sequinsmile-x · 2 days ago

Text

400 - Part 1

My 400th Hotchniss fic

Part 1/2

-x-

Hi besties,

It feels absolutely bonkers to say, but this is my 400th Hotchniss fic!! I am so grateful for this corner of the internet, and I appreciate each and every one of you more than I can say. I've made some lifelong friends in this fandom, and I am grateful every single day that I randomly thought "huh - both of them are really hot" when I started watching CM back in lockdown in 2020 and never looked back.

Since this is my 400th fic, this is as unhinged as you think it's going to be. Part 2 will be up in the next couple of days <3

As always, let me know what you think!

-x-

Warnings: pregnancy, canon typical violence, Aaron Hotchner whump, angst

Words: 5k

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Tick.

She focuses on the sound of the clock hanging on the nearby wall, the repetitive, mechanical sound something she could hold onto. She twists her wedding rings side to side in time with it, the diamond of her engagement ring a dull thud against her skin with each click. It’s a habit that had long replaced her picking at her cuticles, the press of cool metal and stone against the pad of her thumb and forefinger instead of broken skin and blood. It was a much needed reminder of her and Aaron’s love for each other, for the family they had built from the wreckage of their pasts.

Tock.

She has to remind herself to breathe. Everything that usually comes naturally, that she does without thought, feels hard. Impossible. As if her body was slowly shutting down, as if the reality of what was happening was slowly catching up with her. She sucks in a breath and it catches on her ribs, sticks against them in a way that hurts, and it stutters back out, her chest barely rising and falling as she does her best to not draw too much attention to herself.

Tick.

She flinches when JJ places her hand on her arm, a friendly attempt at comfort the very thing that might tip her over the edge. The final push over the precipice she’d spent days scrambling to hold on to, everything she felt shoved down deep in her gut, buried by making sure the kids were okay and trying to make sure that they weren’t worried, weighing her down until her grip started to slip.

“Em-”

“Please don’t,” she says, pulling her arm away so fast she thinks it should hurt, but she can’t feel anything. She looks up from the floor, unaware she’d been looking down in the first place, and her eyes meet JJ’s, “I…” she clears her throat, everything she wants to say stuck in her throat, “Please don’t.”

Tock.

“Mrs Hotchner?”

She almost flinches at the use of her married name and she reminds herself that she’s here as Aaron’s wife, not in a professional capacity. She stands up, her hands shaking as she runs them down her shirt, her hand lingering just a second over her stomach. She tries, but fails, to remember the name of the doctor who’s standing in front of her, her mind too occupied by everything else, by the weight of the preemptive grief she can feel on her chest. She knows she’ll never forget her face, that it would be painted in her memory for the rest of her life, bold and chillingly bright for a moment she’d sooner rather forget.

She’d been the person to deliver bad news more than once, had been this person in other people's lives, and the thought of it makes her feel nauseous.

“Are you ready?” Emily asks, and the doctor nods.

“Em,” JJ says from behind her, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“I have to know.” She nods, even though she isn’t sure, and she turns back to look at the doctor, hoping she doesn’t see the shake in her voice, “I’m ready.”

___

Three Days Earlier

“Mama!”

She smiles as she rolls onto her back, opening her bleary eyes as tiny hands press against her face, her hopes of another few minutes in bed gone as her 2-year-old climbs on top of her. Lucas curls up in her arms, his dark hair tickling under her chin as she pulls him closer. Aaron’s side of the bed is empty, the warmth still lingering on the sheets letting her know he hadn’t been gone for long, the roar of the shower in the ensuite telling her exactly where he is.

“Morning, sweet boy,” she says, kissing the top of his head before she tilts her head to look at him. She runs her knuckles down his cheek to chase a smile out of him, something that had worked since he was only a handful of weeks old, and she couldn’t help but smile back. She gently pokes his nose, her nose, and her smile gets wider, “I seem to remember you going to sleep in your own bed last night.”

“I like big bed.”

She hums and kisses his forehead, “I know, baby,” she holds him closer, content to spend some time with him before the day starts. Before she and Aaron have to go to work and the boys have to go to school and daycare, “Why don’t we snuggle for a little bit whilst Daddy showers?”

He nods against her, “Yes, snuggles.”

She hides her smile in his hair and breathes him in, the strawberry scent of his no tears shampoo washing over her, “I love you, Lukey.”

“‘ove you, Mama.”

She runs her fingers through his hair and hums to him, the tune she can’t name drowned out by the shower until it switches off. She smiles when she hears the ensuite door open just a couple of minutes later, and she looks up as Aaron walks into the bedroom, a towel wrapped around his waist as he dries his hair with another.

“Morning,” he says, smiling at the sight of them together, “I can’t believe I went to shower and came back to find you in bed with another guy.”

“And a much cuter guy at that,” she chuckles and tickles Lucas to pull a laugh out of him too before she looks down at him, “Why don’t you go make sure Jack is awake for me?” She says, sitting up to help him back down onto the floor, “It’s almost time for breakfast.”

Lucas nods and starts to toddle out of the room, “Hi Dada.”

“Hi buddy,” he says, reaching down to ruffle his hair as he walks past him and out into the hallway, already calling out Jack’s name before he’s out of the room. Aaron turns to look at his wife, his smile slipping as she groans when she climbs out of bed, “Are you okay sweetheart?”

“I’m fine,” she says, her hand on his arm when she makes it to his side, “I wish your youngest son had my respect for a few extra minutes in bed, but I’m fine.”

Aaron chuckles and reaches for her hand, linking their fingers together before he leans forward to kiss her, “I’ll get dressed and then get the boys started on breakfast whilst you get ready.”

“Thanks, honey,” she hums as she pulls back. She squeezes his hand, takes a moment to feel the familiar press of his skin against hers, how the gaps between her fingers seemed to have been made for his. She’d always loved his hands, loved the strength he carried in them but how gentle they could be, how the callouses on the pad of his thumb were rough against the skin of her wrist as he traced it back and forth over her pulse, forever chasing the beat of her heart every chance he had, “I’ll meet you downstairs.”

“Do you want your usual breakfast?”

She nods and smiles gratefully before she turns and walks into the bathroom, rolling her neck to stretch it out as she goes. She lingers, takes her time washing her face until she hears Aaron leave the bedroom, his voice as he talks to the boys getting quieter as he gets further away, his footsteps on the stairs signalling that she is finally alone upstairs. She blows out a slow breath and opens the medicine cabinet, her eyes immediately seeking out the pregnancy test she knew was hidden behind her unopened box of tampons. She presses her lips together, desperate to contain her excitement, to try and tamper it down until she had confirmation that her intuition was right.

They’d been trying again for a little while, just long enough that she was starting to doubt it would happen again, but then she started to notice symptoms. A familiar exhaustion she’d felt when she was pregnant with Lucas, and a type of nausea she’d felt then and once before. She hadn’t told Aaron her suspicions, hadn’t wanted to get his hopes up with hers, needed one of them to have both of their feet firmly planted on the ground whilst she got carried away with fantasies of adding to their family.

She rips the box open, excitement that feels dangerous thrumming beneath her skin as she pulls the test out. Her stomach flips with something more than nausea for once as she hears her husband and sons laughing downstairs, the thought of another laugh she didn’t know yet joining in with them warming her from the inside out.

___

By the time she gets out of the shower, she’s missed two calls from work. She tries to call back but can’t get hold of anyone, rolling her eyes when she gets Clyde’s voicemail when she tries to contact him as a last resort.

She left the BAU shortly after she and Aaron told people that they were together. It was practical for more than one reason - it helped them get around any issues within the FBI’s rules about inter-team relationships, and it helped her get the new start she’d desperately needed. Clyde’s offer of a job was as needed as it was timely, and although she turned down his offer of going to London, she’d accepted the moment he said there was a role in DC waiting for her if she wanted it.

There were moments at first when she’d wondered if she had done the right thing. When she’d lay in bed and miss Aaron being next to her. The days he was away and out of her reach, when she couldn’t keep him safe, long and drawn out. But then Jack would sneak into their room, he’d slip under the covers and snuggle up to her and he’d whisper he was glad that she was there, and she knew she wouldn’t go back.

It was something that was only solidified when she found out she was pregnant with Lucas. Her need to never make the same choices her mother had, to ensure that her children never thought her job came before them, strong enough that she now worked part time. On the days she didn’t work she’d take Jack to school and spend the day with Lucas before she picked Jack up again, making small talk with the other parents as they waited for the kids to come out. It was ordinary and beautiful and hers, and she was endlessly grateful for the balance she’d found.

She smiles as she turns sideways to look at her reflection in the mirror. She smoothes her hands over her stomach and sighs happily, her lips pressed together as she thinks about how their family is going to change again. How the tiny dot of a thing growing beneath her skin would disrupt their current normal, throw everything into the air again and disrupt their lives in the most incredible way.

She sighs as her phone rings again and she picks it up, barely dragging her attention away from her reflection as she answers it, “Prentiss.”

She listens as she’s told about an urgent case. Several senators had received threats and one of them had been sent a package with a bomb that had thankfully not detonated. She sighs, knowing she’s in for a long day, but she can’t help but smile to herself when she’s told they’ll be working with the BAU because of the urgency. She hangs up and gets ready quickly, ignoring the roll in her belly as nausea climbs up her throat.

“Not now, baby,” she says, rubbing her stomach, “Daddy doesn’t even know about you yet.” She presses her fingers against her lips and swallows thickly before she heads downstairs, smiling softly at her husband when he meets her in the hallway, his expression stern in a way that only meant one thing, “Pen called you about the senators?”

He nods, “Apparently they need as many agencies involved as possible.”

“Are the boys done with breakfast?”

“They’ve eaten and they are dressed,” he replies, “According to Lucas I didn’t cut his toast the ‘right way’, but we got there in the end.”

She hums and straightens his tie, “The trick is to put it on your own plate and let him eat it from there,” she presses her lips together to contain her smile, happiness almost threatening to burst out of her as she thinks about what he doesn’t know yet, “Honey-”

She’s cut off as his phone rings, and he groans, “Sorry, sweetheart, one second.”

She nods as he answers and steps away, and she walks into the kitchen, smiling at Jack as she finds him loading the dishwasher, “You didn’t have to do that, sweetie,” she says as she walks past Lucas in his high chair, pushing her fingers through his hair as she goes.

“It’s okay,” Jack says, smiling as he turns to look at her, “I like to help.”

She runs her fingers through his hair, “I know you do,” she says, smiling when he dodges out of her way a little. Now he was 10 he was on the edge of finding his parents uncool, testing the boundaries for the first time every now and then before he’d remember how much he loved a hug from either one of them, “Go brush your teeth, Dad and I both have a case.”

“Okay Mom,” He nods, smiling at her as he wraps his arms around her waist for a moment, “Love you.”

“Love you too,” she replies as he runs out of the room and she turns her attention to Lucas, smiling as she lifts him into her arms, stamping a kiss against his cheek as she settles him on her hip, “What’s all this about you giving Daddy a hard time over breakfast?”

“I like Mama toast.”

She chuckles, “I know you do, baby.”

“Sorry, sweetheart,” Aaron says as he walks into the kitchen, shaking his head at himself as he puts his phone back in his pocket, “What were you going to say?”

She opens her mouth, she almost tells him, but she stops herself. She didn’t want this to be news they exchanged in a rush, something they only had a second to celebrate before they had to get on with their day, the case they’d both been called to looming over them. She wanted to take her time, to let the happy news sink in and watch it sink in for him too, to see the smile spread across his face and press her thumbs against his dimples as she kissed him.

“Nothing that can’t wait,” she says, stepping forward to stamp her lips against his, “I’ll tell you later,” she bounces Lucas on her hip, drawing a giggle out of the little boy, “I’ll go help this one brush his teeth and then we need to get going.”

Aaron smiles and kisses her and then Lucas’s forehead, “I’ll make sure Jack is ready for school.”

She nods and walks out of the kitchen, listening to Lucas’s chatter the entire way, unaware that by the end of the day, she would wish she’d told her husband that they were going to be parents again.

She’d find herself wishing all kinds of things, but mostly that he’d come home safe to her.

___

She was furious at her husband.

She watches in disbelief as she sees him on the news, his face plastered over every TV screen in her office and the bullpen around her, as he purposely put a target on his back. She calls him the second she’d finished watching the interview, his proclamation that he was personally going to make sure the perpetrators of this attempted terrorist attack were found still ringing in her ears.

He answers the phone almost immediately, clearly having been expecting her call, and she closes her office door behind her so no one on her team hears her shouting at her self-sacrificing idiot of a husband.

“Hi Em.”

She chokes on a laugh, “Hi? Is that all I get?” She asks, shaking her head as she sits down at her desk, “I just saw you on the news. A little warning would have been nice.”

“I know, I’m sorry sweetheart,” he says, “Part of the profile for these guys is that they hate authority. The director was pushing us to put something out there so we didn’t have a chance to share cross-agency before we spoke to the press.”

She scoffs, “I’m not talking as a member of another agency, Aaron,” she says, “I’m talking as your wife. You…you put a huge target on your back.”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. Someone had to do it.”

She hums, “And it just had to be you?” She quips, her anger extinguished by the way he sighs down the phone, guilt poured over it because she knows he wouldn’t have made the decision lightly, “Just…be careful. Please. For me.”

“I’m always careful.”

She chuckles and shakes her head as she rests one of her hands on her bump, “Sure, honey,” she looks up when someone knocks on her door, “I should go.”

“Me too. Love you.”

“You too,” she replies, waving one of her agents in as she hangs up, “Where are we up to?”

It’s a long day, and she’s exhausted by the time she gets home. It’s later than she liked to get home, and she’s not surprised to see Aaron isn’t home yet either. She smiles gratefully at Jess as she tells her that the boys have had dinner and Lucas is tucked up in bed. She promises Jack she’ll watch a movie with him and heads upstairs to change into something more comfortable, yawning as she sends Aaron a text to ask when he’ll be home too. She frowns when the text doesn't go through, a flash of anxiety rolling through her that she tries to shake off. She sends JJ a text instead, sure that Aaron’s phone had simply run out of battery, and she sits on the edge of the bed, taking the first moment to herself that she’d had all day since Lucas had slipped into the bed next to her.

She jumps when her phone rings and her anxiety returns in full force when she sees JJ calling. She answers quickly, her heart sinking into her stomach when she hears Henry and Will in the background.

“JJ?”

“Em, is Hotch not home yet?”

She swallows thickly, “No…he isn’t,” she hears how JJ hesitates, her lips pressed together as the silence that follows frays her nerves, every one of them unravelling like thread, “JJ…what’s going on?”

JJ sighs, “Emily, he sent us home 2 hours ago. I left at the same time as him. I followed him out of the parking lot.”

Emily sucks in a breath and presses her fingers against her lips, a failed attempt to push back the nausea she can feel climbing up her throat, “He should be home by now?”

“He should be home by now,” JJ confirms and Emily closes her eyes before she looks up at the ceiling, stopping any tears pressing at the back of her eyes from falling.

She didn’t have time to break down.

“He put himself in danger, JJ. He…what if something happened to him?”

“I’ll call Pen and the others,” JJ says, “See if we can track his phone or something. You stay there, stay with the boys. I’ll call you when I know something, okay?” She says, and Emily nods, not realising she hadn’t spoken until JJ continues, “Em?”

“Yes, sorry,” she replies, blowing out a breath, “I’ll be here. I think his phone is off. When I sent him a text it didn’t go through.”

JJ is silent for a moment before she clears her throat, “I’ll call you, okay?”

“Okay,” she replies, unsure how her voice is steady when it feels like the ground beneath her is anything but. “As soon as you can?”

“As soon as I can.”

When she hangs up and the room falls into silence she drops her phone onto the bed. She leans forward and rests her elbows on her knees and her head in her hands, “Damn it, Aaron.”

“Mom?” Jack calls up the stairs, his voice light, free of the knowledge that his father was missing, and she was going to make sure that remained the case until she knew more about what was happening, “Are you ready?”

She stands up and clenches her fists to stop her hands from shaking. She couldn’t fall apart. She wouldn’t allow herself to. She blows out a shaky breath and ignores how it catches in her chest.

“Coming, sweet boy.”

___

For three days there is no news. Three, long, agonising, days.

She does what she always told herself she wouldn’t do - she lies to her children. She tells them Aaron is away on a case but that he’s busy so can’t call like he usually would. She isn’t sure Jack believes her, but he doesn’t say anything, and she’s grateful that Lucas is too young to understand. She tries to work, but Clyde doesn’t let her. He calls and tells her under no uncertain terms that he better not get a call to say she’s in the office. She finds herself strangely grateful for it, unsure that she’d be able to concentrate, that she’d be of anything other than a hindrance in finding her husband.

On the third night, just after Jack is in bed and she sits on the couch, the house so quiet she almost wants Lucas to wake up so she has something to distract her from Aaron’s absence, there’s a knock on the front door. She knows it’s JJ without looking, because she’s the only other person she knows who would understand not to ring the bell with a sleeping toddler in the house. She opens the door, her grip on the handle tight as JJ and Penelope smile at her from the porch and something about the kindness painted across their faces makes her angry.

“What’s happened? Have you found him?”

JJ hesitates, “Why don’t we come in-”

“What happened?” She insists, stepping out onto the porch, pulling the door almost all the way closed behind her to ensure neither of the boys overhears anything if they come looking for her, “Is he…” She drifts off, unable to put it into words, the thought of losing him so overwhelming she feels lightheaded.

Penelope swallows thickly, “We…we don’t know.”

She chokes on a sound somewhere between a sob and a laugh, “What do you mean you don’t know?”

It comes out angrier than she intends it to, but she can’t help it, everything she’s tried her best to not feel for days burning her from the inside out.

“There was an explosion,” JJ explains, “the same kind of bomb sent to Senator Powell. There was a body found and…” she swallows thickly, her eyes shining with tears she’s trying and failing to hide from Emily, “And the body had Aaron’s badge and gun with it. They are working on the identification.”

She sways this time, she knows she does because both of them step towards her, their hands out in front of them to steady her, but she shakes them off, her hand against the wall behind her as she steadies herself.

“I need to see him.”

“Em…” JJ shakes her head, “The man’s face has been badly burned. It’s not possible to-”

“I need to see him,” she says, cutting over JJ as she looks at Penelope, “Can you stay with the boys? They don’t know Aaron is missing…if…if one of them wakes up-”

“I’ll just say you’re at work.”

Emily nods her thanks and looks at JJ, “I’ll just grab my bag.”

___

“Mrs Hotchner?”

She’d been the person to deliver bad news more than once, had been this person in other people's lives, and the thought of it makes her feel nauseous.

“Are you ready?” Emily asks, and the doctor nods.

“Em,” JJ says from behind her, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“I have to know.” She nods, even though she isn’t sure, and she turns back to look at the doctor, hoping she doesn’t see the shake in her voice, “I’m ready.”

They are led into a quiet room, and Emily’s breath catches in her throat as she sees the body on the gurney, the stark white of the sheet lying over it making her pause in the doorway before she steps through. JJ stands next to her, and for the first time, Emily is grateful that she’s there, that she isn’t alone. The doctor looks at Emily, waiting for her okay, and she nods.

She gasps when the sheet is pulled back, the smell of burnt flesh overwhelming as makes her stomach lurch. It triggers a memory, makes her chest burn and she rubs at the phantom ache she immediately feels in the long healed brand mark. When she blinks she sees Ian, sees the warehouse in Boston and smells her own flesh burning.

She blinks against and sees Aaron’s face, his eyes wide and unseeing, the golden flecks she’d always loved dulled. Tarnished by whatever had happened to him. She opens her eyes and looks at the body again, sucking in a breath as she has to look away from the burned face down the body, her gaze lingering on his hands.

“Em, if you can’t-”

“It isn’t him,” she says, talking over JJ’s attempt to comfort her, and she swallows thickly as she looks back up at the doctor, “He’s taller. And his hands are…” she presses her lips together to try to stop the shake in them, everything she’d spent days ignoring climbing up her throat, her eyes fixed on hands she does not recognise, “Aaron’s hands are bigger. You can wait for the dental records if you want, but trust me. It isn’t him,” she looks between her friend and the stranger whose face she’ll always remember, “Excuse me.”

She walks out of the room, her vision blurred with tears she didn’t think she can hold off anymore, and she carries on until she’s outside, the fresh air and everything she didn’t want to feel hitting her all at once. She captures a sob with her hand, attempts to muffle it as she leans against the wall, the roughness of the brick against the palm of her hand barely registering. It wasn’t him. He wasn’t dead, yet, or as far as she knew.

It wasn’t him. But where was he?

She throws up, couldn’t stop it if she wanted to, tears burning tracks on her cheeks that feel permanent as she gasps and tries to catch her breath. She wipes her mouth with the sleeve of her jacket and swallows thickly, the burn in the back of her throat a welcome distraction.

“Em?”

She turns to look at JJ, “I’m okay.”

“You’re not,” JJ says, and she places her hand on her back and leads her over to a nearby bench, “I wouldn’t be either,” she digs through her purse and pulls out a pack of gum, “Here you go.”

“Thanks,” Emily says, her hand shaking as she takes a piece, “Mint helps,” her lips tremble as JJ looks at her, the unasked question painted across her face, “I’m pregnant.”

JJ nods, “How far along are you?”

Emily laughs humourlessly and shakes her head as she chews the gum, wiping tears from her cheek. “I don’t know. I only found out the day Aaron…I found out that morning,” she places her hand on her flat belly, “He doesn’t even know. I didn’t get the chance to tell him.”

She wishes she’d told him. Wishes she’d taken the second they had and let him know they were having a baby so that if the worst happened, if she really never got him back, she could tell her son or daughter that their father knew about them and was excited to know them. She felt guilty for taking that from Aaron, for not giving him the chance to know he was going to be a father again, and she felt guilty for feeling like she was giving up on him by thinking that way at all.

“I won’t tell anyone,” she assures her, and she reaches for Emily’s hand, squeezing it gently, “Em-”

She shakes her head and wipes away tears that are immediately replaced, “It isn’t him, JJ. I know him. I’ve held his hand more times than I can count and-”

“Em,” she repeats, squeezing her hand again, “I know.”

Emily furrows her brow, “You do?”

JJ nods, “After you stepped outside the dental records came through. It isn’t Aaron.”

Emily sobs again, her ribs aching as it forces itself upwards, and she covers her mouth, “It isn’t?”

“No. It flagged up someone from the military database, I’ve sent his details across to Derek. He’s looking into it,” she smiles sadly, “Looks like your obsession with Hotch’s hands paid off.”

“Yeah,” She nods and wipes her cheeks, “I guess it has,” she blows out a shaky breath and shakes her head, “Where is he JJ? If he isn’t…” she drifts off again, “Where the hell is he?”

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